Leaderboard

Chapter 92: Long Days GARY LOOKED THOUGHTFULLY at Beth, “I could probably walk Beth through it? It’s only the attaching it on now?” “Beth, please?” Carly asked. “Where were you when he did this to me just now…?” She laughed nervously. “Sure, I’ll be a good girlfriend and be the one to touch your new no-no parts.” As Gary lifted her, she realized Carly was actually shaking some and felt a bit bad about the joke she’d just made. “It’s okay,” Gary told her. “Normal to be nervous about this kind of thing, Carly.” He handed the device to Beth and walked her through the process. When they were done attaching it, he gave her a diaper, and she also diapered her boy… girlfriend. “There, all done!” she said as she pulled his arms up to a sitting position. They were both tiny compared to the Bigs, but he was about the size an older toddler or preschool child of hers would be to her. “Thanks, sorry I freaked out,” he told them. “You just got those parts, I can imagine not wanting them touched!” Gary laughed. “Come on, let’s get you two out there! Sebastian is probably ready to go nuts by now.” Carly felt the stupid PooPloder as she walked, just like Beth. She’d noticed they seemed different sizes, so while hers wasn’t the same size, she could feel it against the bodysuit and the diaper, smashing it into her through the covering. Reminding herself not to press the button on accident, even if they weren’t armed already, they made it to the scene. “Okay,” Sebastian said, “Let’s just film some playtime first here?” “Umm… what do you want us to do?” Carly asked. “Did you ever play tea party as a kid?” Charlotte asked. Carly blushed again, the prettiest color of red at that! “I take it that’s a yes?” She smiled, “You must have sisters?” “Three of them,” her boyfriend replied. “Ah, perfect then!” she said. “You two have a tea party for about fifteen minutes; we’ll film it, and then we’ll get on with the script.” “You’re kidding, right?” Beth asked. “How else are we getting playtime recorded?” Sebastian asked with a shrug. “We may not make you do it for fifteen minutes, but we need to get footage from a few perspectives.” With a sigh, Carly grabbed Beth’s hand, and they found a couple of dolls apiece, a stuffed animal each, and a virtual tea cup set. Somehow, the next fifteen minutes became thirty minutes, as Carly decided to have fun with it, and the whole thing became a complete silly college fest! Their dolls began describing relationships they were in, but a little bit too deep of a level of knowledge for a kid. The crew was in hysterics as Carly described how one doll’s boyfriend just couldn’t perform well enough, and another doll had a tragic love life with a garbage plant manager. “We can never put that in the film with the audio,” Charlotte said, still wiping tears from her eyes thirty minutes later. “No, but we can all know what goes along with the footage when we see the montage!” Will said. “Conn… Carly, brilliant work. I’m beginning to think you need to rethink the math stuff and go into acting for real!” I FOUND MYSELF laughing with everyone else and shaking my head, feeling the shorter hair sway differently as I did so. “I appreciate the sentiment, but I much prefer the idea of being in the director role… or creating the technology itself we’re using.” Sebastian nodded, “Okay, time to get back to work here, everyone!” A call was made for the part of Scene 19 we were filming. “Arm PooPloders!” “Armed!” Moments later, there was the call to action on the scene I had wanted to skip! I began holding one of the dolls against my stomach and making faces. Beth said, “What’s wrong, Bree?” I forced my face to look momentarily surprised and lost, “Bree?” Looking up at her, she smiled at me, “That’s your name, silly!” I did my best to give the tiniest smile, “I like that.” “What’s wrong? Mommy calls that a potty face?” I squirmed a bit on the floor where I was sitting like I was holding in a bit of poop, “Umm...” She laughed at me, “Bree! Just use your diaper, silly!” When I looked at her skeptically, she added, “Potties are boring; playing is much more fun!” “It’s gro…” I started to say when she squatted and activated her PooPloder. I wrinkled my nose as if I could smell it, “Callie, did you just?” She didn’t answer, though, just intentionally falling on her butt and squishing it as she brought a teacup to Professor Tilly’s mouth. Then she looked at me and smiled, “Poopy!” The next part wasn’t supposed to wait, so I began, “I...” Even as I bent my own knees and activated the PooPloder. I could feel a good chunk of the fake poop on the outer edges of the little body shaper, and the stickiness on my legs felt horrible! I didn’t even have to act to feel disgusting right then! “Eew…” I said quietly. Right on cue, Charlotte entered the room. She wrinkled her nose and said, “Pee-eew!! It smells like a stinky baby in here!” Beth rocked the diaper back and forth and shook her head, “Nuh-uh, we don’t stink like babies, Mommy!” Charlotte pulled the ultimate diaper check, pulling the dress out of the way and the back of her diaper open. She sighed, “Well, you certainly do, Callie!” As Charlotte started to pick Beth up, she pointed at me, “Well, so does Bree!!! She’s stinky too!” “Oh?” She grabbed Beth’s hand instead and came around our tea party setup to me. She let go of Beth’s hand then and picked me up, bringing my bottom up to her nose and sniffing. Right then, I didn’t have to fight to make sniffles or tears; the whole thing was genuinely mortifying. Charlotte carried me over to the changing table and then, “Well, it looks like you’re right, Callie! Brianna is a stinky baby, too! Let’s get both baby girls in nice clean diapees, then we’ll go get you your din-din!” There was no real reason to film the entire cleanup. Still, they put the camera by my head for the shot, and Charlotte used eight wipes to get the mess cleaned up before placing a new diaper on me. I walked to the side and held on to one of the stuffed animals we’d been playing with as Beth endured the same change. “Come here, you,” Charlotte said as she placed Beth on her hip, then picked me up and carried me on the other hip down the stairs. “Cut!!!!” “Thank god!” Beth said beside me. I nodded, “Please tell me the shots were good enough that we don’t have to do that again?!?” Charlotte looked down sympathetically at us as she placed us on the ground. “Sebastian, review the footage with Will quickly; I’d also rather not have to clean up that Pooploder crap a bunch more times. It doesn’t smell, but I swear it kept sticking to my hands worse than any baby poop ever has!” “You should try wearing it,” I told her deadpan. “I’m so glad those weren’t invented when I had those moments in my shows…” she said. “Then what did you guys do in that…?” Beth started to ask. “Oh, Sebastian, make sure you check,” Charlotte ran after him. “Somehow, I think that was going to be an embarrassing answer?” I asked. “Maybe…?” Unfortunately for the three of us, there were two more takes of the scene that we had to make before we were able to move on! Camera angles, minor timing issues, and one time a stray glance of a crew member in the main shot had unfortunately meant getting a growing familiarity with the awful stickiness of the poo in the PooPloders! BETH SAW THE crew had been at it for another six hours after lunch, and it was 23 O’Clock. With only a few more hours to go until they needed to get Connor’ home’ – or at least off-campus- it seemed unlikely they would get everything filmed. Fortunately, things had been going a little smoother, and most scenes were taking two or fewer takes. They had just filmed her being put to bed, and she was done being filmed sleeping for the moment while the action focused on Carly. They restarted the scene as Charlotte gathered a onesie-clad Carly in her arms. She couldn’t help but be jealous watching Charlotte hold her as she wrapped her in a light blanket and said, “Here, hand me your baba.” Carly tentatively handed the bottle to Charlotte, who placed it on a small end table they’d added beside the rocking chair. She took the time to tighten the blanket around her and put her in the crook of her arm like she was an infant. “What are you doing?” Carly asked nervously. “Feeding you your baba,” she smiled down at her. “Bu…” Carly got out as the nipple entered her mouth. This was the fifth time they’d done this little piece, and each time they’d had timing issues. Carly held off nursing for a long moment before starting to drink the liquid even as Charlotte rocked the chair. Charlotte said, “I know you want to be a big grown-up again, and I promise you will be, eventually. Right now, you’re going to be my little Bree. Enjoy letting go a little, Sweetie.” As she finished her line, she paused for a second and began singing a simple Lullaby. Carly’s eyes went closed, and then she went limp. Charlotte giggled, “They’re right; Mommy’s milk does it every time!” “Cut!” “Carly, you didn’t really go to sleep on me, did you?” she laughed. For her part, she sat up, “No… though it was close! Right now, though, I need a bathroom!!!!!” Beth watched as Charlotte carried her quickly to the dressing room and hoped she’d make it. I COULDN’T BELIEVE how quickly the urge to go potty hit me!!!! To her credit, Charlotte practically ran with me to the bathroom, but when she pulled up my dress to remove the diaper, I grimaced and said, “Stop…” I couldn’t hold it any longer and felt it just flow and flow out of me. Fortunately, Gary had made the call to pull the control panty off of me after the PooPloder scene because I didn’t even want to think about that mess! ‘I can’t believe I couldn’t hold it?!?’ This was one of my first genuine accidents where I felt like I was a Little… and very much the baby so many Bigs saw Littles as! I did my best to breathe and not cry, but I couldn’t hide the face of shame I wore. “I’m sorry,” Charlotte said, even as her hand was under my diaper. There was no way she didn’t know what had happened. “I should have gone after the last take… I just figured I could still make it this last one. Those four bottles of liquid, fake milk or not, all had to go somewhere.” She gave me a hug, “Sorry, Connor… You don’t normally have problems?” She asked. I shook my head, “This is one of my very few genuine accidents, actually,” I said through my teeth, as I did everything not to break down! She gave me a moment, squeezed me again, and asked, “Are you finished? I can take this off, and you can sit on the potty and be sure?” I sighed and shook my head, “Trust me, it’s all in the diaper…” “Well then, let’s get you changed; we’re almost done for the day with you guys.” “I’m glad to hear that. These longer days in this dimension are a killer on this project!” “What do you mean?” She asked as she pulled the tapes open. “Well, we have eight hours less in our days in my dimension.” “When do you get everything done?” She asked, surprised. I laughed, “You know, there’s some truth to that!” I did the math in my head; it was now almost 24 O’clock, and we started at 8 O’clock with filming. We’d already put in a sixteen-hour day and planned to film three shorter scenes before Beth and I left. That didn’t include the two scenes they would catch up on after we left! She was just using a wipe gently on my bottom when the door opened, and Beth came in. “Oh, sorry…” she stammered. “It’s okay,” Charlotte said, “We’re all actresses here, just getting Carly back and ready to go for the next scene.” Beth’s eyes caught mine, and I knew she had to know what we were dealing with. She mouthed, “Sorry” to me. With as many scenes as we still had to film that day, I had no choice but to pull up my big girl panties and get back to work. Metaphorically, of course! Our waking up and breakfast scenes went quickly in one take for the most part. We had to divide up one part of the breakfast feeding scene for camera angle issues. To my amusement, the eggs they gave us were genuinely just cooked in an attached breakroom AmeniTea, our crew had just discovered would take meal points or their equivalent of a credit card. The stupid, dull, curved plastic baby spork things were just about impossible to use to scoop them up, but I made sure that I kept my face and bib pretty much perfectly clean. Beth didn’t try that to my amusement, and true to her character, Charlotte had to clean her up! Our final scenes of the day were at the daycare, and I think both Beth and I hated them as much as anything! Every part of the room was actually sized for me perfectly! It was a rare place in this dimension I could say that about. Unfortunately, even though Beth was taller, she still could sit in the chairs and not look too awkward or big for them! The crew made fast work of the scenes, and we were soon down to the final two small parts we were filming that day with us. Right then, we were in a circle for story time, and someone had found the genuine children’s story, The Little Who Couldn’t. Isabella did a way too convincing job of reading it right then. It reminded me of a lady who did preschool lessons online back home and posted them. I’d been stuck watching them enough with my baby sisters years ago that I was sure this girl could pull the same trick! We got to learn all about a Little who successfully graduated high school and then failed at every other adult thing she ever tried. She couldn’t pass college, she couldn’t be a secretary, she couldn’t be a police officer, she couldn’t be a construction worker, she couldn’t be a waitress… and on it went. The character got more and more upset until right before she discovered what she could be! Mommy’s precious baby girl! ‘Sarah’ walked in as the final page was turned. I wanted to vomit and had no issues with the acting of standing up and going towards her. Right then, ‘Callie’ leaped past me though and wrapped her in a hug. “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” Beth jumped up and down like she was an excited preschooler. “You’re just in time! The Little is about to be adopted like Bree!” I cringed at some of the ‘extra’ lines suggested to Beth on the previous take. She did it quite well, though! Charlotte asked, “Huh?” “It’s the Little Who Couldn’t Mommy!” She smiled, “It’s the best story ever!” Charlotte looked confused then, “You mean the Little Who Could?” I sighed and moved closer to her, “No, she means Couldn’t...” As I said, Isabella held up the book, showing the page that showed the woman being held in her mommy’s arms and fed a bottle. “Oh...” she shook her head and muttered, “Seriously?” Looking down at me, she gently reassured me with her hand on my head, “Well, I need to take my two little girls on a special adventure now. You ready to go?” “Please!” I practically begged, even as Beth acted like she wanted to go back. Fortunately, she guided us both out. “Cut!!!” “How was that time?” Charlotte asked. “I think that’s a keeper. Let’s finish this car scene, and then the kids can get out of here!” ‘Kids?’ I thought nervously. We changed the settings to move to the car outside the daycare, and we filmed walking out to the car. I did my best to act like I needed to go to the bathroom badly and blushed when Charlotte squeezed and checked the back of my diaper after buckling Beth in. “You’ll be fine,” she smiled at me as she buckled me inside. After getting inside the car, she started the car on autopilot before turning the seat around and looking at us through the screen above our seats. “Callie, we’re going to take you to Grandma and Grandpa’s tonight.” “Really? Grandma and Grandpa?!?” Charlotte continued, “Uh-huh, we’ll drop you off, and you get to play with them all night tonight! They’re even going to take you to the playground and then to Crazy Fun afterward for pizza.” “Yay!!!” “Umm… Mommy? Can we please stop by a potty?” I didn’t even know why my character would be dumb enough to ask that question now! “Remember, Brianna, you’re both taking a vacation from the potty. Just use your diapee like the good baby you are!” “Please?” Charlotte started to respond, “N…” but then seemed to remember she needed something. With a sigh, she shrugged, “If you can hold it a while... maybe?” Charlotte turned around in her seat and checked on the cars driving. I squirmed more then and made a pained, gassy face, even as I knew a camera was zooming in on my facial expression. “Cut!!!” Sebastian said. “Let me look real quick back at the footage.” Meanwhile, Beth and I were freed from the car seats. “I hate being stuck in a car seat facing the back seat, even if it’s not real!” Beth complained quietly to me. “I hate the whole Littles are stupid thing. That earlier book made me want to go on a rampage…” She laughed, “It was pretty horrible!” “Okay, Connor and Beth, that’s it for you two. Great job today! Go get changed out of costume and get out of here. Be back here at 9 O’clock tomorrow so we can finish your last four scenes,” Sebastian said with a smile. “Got it,” I said, leading Beth out of the stage and to wardrobe. “Everyone else, we need to get the office setup and let’s get Scenes 22 and 27 completed. That will get us caught up from Wednesday’s fiasco! Almost done today!” +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Thanks for reading! Please press the 'Like' button and leave me a comment! After this week I'm hoping to get into a bit more serious of a rhythm of writing again. I'm working on Chapter 110 right now, hoping to wrap up at least another chapter or two today! I will post another chapter on WattPad this week since they crossed 5k likes yesterday. I'll post it here as well as long as this post gets 25+ likes. (You all were falling behind this weekend 👿 ) Thanks again for reading my works! Please consider purchasing a copy of my completed works from Amazon if you enjoy them! Having a small source of extra income there helps me keep the spare time to write for you all! If you have purchased them, please be sure you've clicked the five star review option! (You don't have to leave a public comment that others can see) http://amazon.com/author/babysofia

Seventy-One I still hadn’t completely recovered from my run-in, and subsequent conversation, with Pizza Girl–Paige, apparently–as I returned to the table a few minutes later. There was a fresh diaper under my pants that was more than likely poorly taped up, but short of calling Lyndie into the bathroom to help me, there wasn’t much I could do about that. As it turned out, it had been a good idea to change myself when I had. The old diaper was in far worse condition than I even realized. There was even a small wet spot forming on the back of my pants–one that, thankfully, nobody else had been aware of. “Ah, here he is,” Lyndie said upon my return. “Did you fall in? You were in there for a while.” She knew damn well what I was doing in the bathroom–everyone at the table, save for Caleb, did. Always a kidder, that one. I sat down with a sigh, my new diaper crinkling under my bottom–hopefully not so loudly that anyone else heard it. “I fell in,” I nodded. “Took me a while to swim out, but I finally did it.” “Clark? I want you to meet my friend Caleb,” Ava said. “Caleb? This is my good friend Clark.” We both stood simultaneously, shaking hands across the table. “Ah yeah, Clark,” Caleb said. “Ava mentions you all the time.” “Hopefully not because she’s cursing my name,” I said. I couldn’t help but notice that Ava’s cheeks were blushing a little. “Quite the contrary,” he said. “I’ve only ever heard good things about you. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” “Likewise,” I said. I was tempted to add that I had heard good things about him too, but I didn’t really know anything about him at all. “Oh,” Caleb said, his eyes lighting up. “Actually, Clark, I owe you a huge ‘thank you.’” “Uh, you do?” “Yes! I guess, a while back, you had mentioned a show that you liked to Ava. Mythical Knights of Far Earth. I initially wasn’t interested in watching it, but she had it on everytime I visited her apartment, so I kind of got sucked into it. Now I absolutely adore it!” I could see that Ava’s cheeks were getting even pinker. I supposed that Caleb didn’t know the rest of that story–that when I told Ava about that show, we were in a park together in the middle of the night. A few minutes prior to that, we had been making out and feeling each other’s diapers. We had talked about how I wished my chastity cage could’ve been unlocked. “That series is hard to watch anymore,” I said. “I don’t think it’s streaming anywhere.” “Oh, well, I bought the DVDs online,” Ava shrugged. “Actually…I think I ordered it not long after you told me about it.” That probably cost her a pretty good amount of money. I had a small scratch on one of my discs and had once considered replacing it, only to be put off by the ridiculous prices the DVDs were fetching on Ebay.” All I really felt was regret. I sometimes wondered if I would’ve done things the same way if I could go back to when Mommy asked if I wanted to move in with her. Maybe I’d have said no. Or, at the very least, I’d have said yes, but with the caveat that I needed to stay in touch with my friends. But it wasn’t Mommy who kept me from them. That was all me. “Well, I’m glad you love the show,” I said to Caleb, quickly flashing a smile as to not let on that I was starting to feel a little down again. “For the record,” Lyndie said, “I hate it. Whenever Ava puts it on–and it’s pretty often–I need to go find something else to do. Clarky, I didn’t know that you were to blame for this.” “W-well, Clark might have introduced me to it,” Ava said, her cheeks maintaining their redness. “But I do like the show a lot.” I’d kill for a one-on-one conversation with Ava about the show. I want to know her favorite character. I want to know what she thought when Dargus Rhatborne jumped into Szar’s mouth. I want to get her opinion on who was the better Truthsayer: Bruck or Mija. And I wanted to have that conversation while my cock was deeply embedded in her pussy. Instead, she was having those conversations with Caleb. And, eventually, he’d be the one fucking her while singing the battle song of the Forever Thieves. “Hey,” Evan said to me, bringing me back to reality. “Guess who I just saw a few minutes ago.” I’m pretty sure I could already guess who it was. “Uh, who?” “Pizza Girl.” Simultaneously, Lyndie and Ava laughed and repeated the name: “Pizza Girl!” “Who the hell is Pizza Girl?” laughed Caleb. “She delivers pizzas,” Evan shrugged. “We didn’t know her name, so we just called her Pizza Girl.” The laughter died a little, everyone else realizing that it wouldn’t be possible to explain why that was funny. It’d be a story involving adults wearing diapers, and being dared to expose oneself to a stranger–things that Ava probably wasn’t ready to tell him much about. “This pizza isn’t bad,” Caleb said. “But if you really want to have some good ‘za, you have to go down to Market Street. There’s this fucking incredible place over by the train station. I’m telling you–best pizza in the whole city.” He continued talking, seeming to be working his way down a list of memorized bullet points about what made this other pizza better than what we were eating now. I stopped paying attention pretty quickly, and I could see that Lyndie had checked out too. She shot me a smile that helped to comfort me some. I didn’t like Caleb. I didn’t think he was an awful human being, by any means. He wasn’t a dick and he had never once been unfriendly. He just wasn’t my type of person, I didn’t think. Also, it probably didn’t help that I saw him as an obstacle standing between Ava and I–but I tried my hardest not to let that weigh on me. Still, I tolerated his company for another hour or so, before Lyndie finally decided to rescue me. “Well, it’s been a good time. But, Clark, I’m thinking I should probably get you home.” “Y-yeah, that’s a good idea.” “It’s almost Clark’s bedtime,” Lyndie said to Caleb. It had the cadence of a joke, but it was actually much closer to the truth. “Well, of course,” he responded. “I don’t want to get in the way of that. Be sure to read him a story before he goes night-night.” It was funny, sure, but only because he didn’t know why the rest of us would think that it was funny. We said our goodbyes. I promised Evan I’d stay in touch. I shook Caleb’s hand one more time. I hugged Ava–our hug lasting a little longer than I expected, with each of us seeming slightly hesitant to be the first to end it. And then I was being driven back to Mommy’s house again. “So,” I said, finally breaking the silence. “That was Caleb?” She shrugged. “That’s him.” “Do you like him?” “He’s fine.” “Just fine?” She shrugged again. “I dunno. You met him. He’s nice enough.” I wanted to continue my interrogation, but it seemed better to drop it. No amount of talking about him was going to change how Ava felt–and she seemed to be smitten with the guy. You could see it in her face whenever she looked at him. “I saw Pizza Girl,” I said to Lyndie, changing the subject. “Yeah, I think I saw her once or twice too,” she said. “I mean, uh, I talked to her.” Her eyes grew big and she laughed. “Really? You didn’t tell me that.” “I know. I didn’t tell anyone. She gave me her number.” “Clarky, are you pulling my leg right now?” “I’m serious! We ran into each other in the hallway where the restrooms were. It was so fucking weird too. Like, we’ve never really talked to each other before, you know? But she looked so happy to see me.” “Yeah, well, she’s not going to forget the face of the guy who answers the door in a diaper.” “That’s just it! She wrote down her phone number for me, right? But she also wrote this little note.” “A note? Well that’s fucking adorable. What did it say?” I opened my mouth to recite the brief message from memory–it had already been burned into my brain–but I just laughed. The note had just been another absurd moment in a long, long, sequence of long events that had started when I randomly encountered Ms. Heller one afternoon, long ago. “Was it a joke?” Lyndie asked, a little confused by my giggle-fit. “N-no,” I said as I tried to compose myself. “Actually, there’s something else I need to ask you first. Before I tell you about that note.” “Okay?” “Do you think Ava and Caleb are going to, uh, date?” Lyndie sighed, her head bobbing from side to side like she was having an internal debate about how honest she wanted to be. That, in and of itself, was probably the answer I was looking for. “I think you just witnessed the start of their first formal date, Clark.” “Huh?” “You and I left. Evan was going back to his apartment. That just left the two of them. Maybe they’re going back to our apartment. Maybe they’re going to go do something else together. But I’m pretty sure their night isn’t over yet.” I felt despair wash over me, settling in the pit of my stomach. I had been right there–right next to her–tonight, and yet I was ultimately powerless to do anything to interfere with her and Caleb. “It’s not a bad thing,” she said. “I know you like her. And I know that she likes you.” “She liked me,” I corrected her. She laughed and shook her head. “Clark, don’t be a stupid baby–as hard as that might be. The world didn’t stop when you moved in with Ms. Heller.” “Yes, yes,” I muttered. “I know. I think about that everyday.” “I see two possibilities: The first? You might not like it, but they might end up together. They’re cute together. I can tell that he likes her, and that she likes him. And all you can really do is be happy for her, in that scenario.” “Of course,” I said, begrudgingly. “I know that.” “The second is that somewhere, down the road, the two of them don’t work out. Maybe that’s a week from now. Maybe that’s years down the road. But even if they did split at some point, that’s not a guarantee that…” “I don’t really like either of these possibilities.” “The point that I’m getting at,” she said, “is that, no matter what, you’re probably not helping yourself if you put all your eggs in her basket. Because, you know, she might be lending her basket to Caleb.” “Is ‘basket’ a euphemism for her…” “It’s just a bad analogy,” she said. “Besides, are you even in good shape for a relationship right now?” No, probably not. “Alright, alright. Point made.” “You have to learn to crawl before you can learn to walk,” Lyndie said, snickering immediately after. “I can crawl just fine.” “My point is that you need to worry about yourself first. Then worry about romance and love.” I laughed. “Okay, but, let me tell you what this note said, now.” “Go for it.” “It said–and I’m not making this up: If you wear your diaper, I’ll wear mine.” “Wait. So you’re telling me that Pizza Girl also wears diapers?” I shrugged. “I mean, that’s what it sounds like, right? What are the odds of that?” “What if…she was just inspired by you.” “What do you mean?” “Like, she saw you in a diaper, right?” “Twice.” “Right. And she liked what she saw and decided to get some for herself.” “I dunno…” “What if, like, you’re becoming a folk hero, of sorts? I mean, think of how many people have seen you in your diaper, right? Maybe some of those people walk away from that thinking that they need to get some diapers for themselves. You’re like, uh, Clarky Diaperseed or something–planting a kinky idea in susceptible minds.” “Maybe…” “So…you’re going to call her?” I laughed. “In that moment, I was so sure that I would. Especially after reading her note.” “Well sure. If she wears diapers, too, you don’t even have to grow up all that much first.” “I guess, yeah. But…I think you were right earlier. I’m probably not ready for a relationship right now. I have to, uh, learn to crawl so that I can walk. I should probably talk to Mommy, too. Before I do anything else.” “She’d be supportive,” Lyndie said. “I’m sure of it.” I’d like to think that she was right. I wasn’t a prisoner or a hostage. I willingly came to live with Mommy. I willingly chose to put my life on hold to experience this lifestyle. I had no fear of Mommy denying me the desire to start taking control of my life again. No, what I feared was that I would break Mommy’s heart. As Hillary seemed to have once before. “How’s your diaper doing?” she asked. “You managed to avoid humiliating yourself with stinky pants in front of everyone else–which only makes me think that you’re overdue for a smelly bottom.” The greasy pizza had been working its magic in my digestive system. Something was cooking, she was right about that. “It’s good for now.” “If at all possible, do you think you could hold off on pooping your pants until we get back to the house? I’d rather my car didn’t smell like a dirty diaper for the next few days.” “I’ll do my best,” I shrugged. “No promises though.” I did wet myself before we pulled into the driveway–a rather heavy wetting, though one my diaper should’ve been more than capable of containing. Except, I could feel the wetness spreading to other parts of my pants where the diaper wasn’t. A leak. I wasn’t all that surprised–I was never very good at diapering myself even on the best of days. Diapering myself in a dingy pizza-shop bathroom, my mind clouded by Paige’s note? Forget about it. “I’m wet,” I announced as she pulled up to the house. “Very wet?” I nodded. She shrugged. “No big deal. We can take care of that inside.” “I, uh, might have leaked…” She sighed, shaking her head. “You know, I had been considering getting some sort of car seat for Bradley, back when he was visiting me. Maybe I still need to get one.” “Don’t say anything about that to Mommy,” I said. “She’d buy one for me in a heartbeat.” “She really would,” Lyndie laughed. “But wouldn’t that be so fucking cute? Her pulling up to a drive-thru window with you in the back, fastened into an oversized car seat, wearing just your thick diapers?” My cock strained against its cage. Yeah, I liked that idea too. She felt the seat where I had been sitting with the palm of her hand, assessing the damage. “A little moist, but not as bad as it could’ve been. Someday, when you have an income of your own, maybe you can detail my car for me?” “Yeah, sure,” I laughed. “But you’ll have to remind me.” “Because you think it’ll be so long until you’re an adult again?” she smirked as she walked towards the front door. “I dunno,” I shrugged, following behind her. “How hard do you think it’ll be for me to just…grow up?” We were stepping through the front door now, and she immediately pointed up the stairs–signaling that before we did anything else, she’d need to change my diaper in the nursery. Good timing too, I thought. There was a heaviness in my bowels. If my diaper was going to be changed anyways, it probably made sense to save her another diaper change later. “Honestly, I don’t think it’ll be as hard as you think it is,” she said. “You crawled around on your hands and knees and filled some diapers for a few months–it’s not like you were in outer space and needed time to acclimate to the planet’s gravity again. You could probably walk out the front door tomorrow and join the masses if you really wanted to.” She made a good point. I sometimes got it in my head that I was a literal baby–or something similar to one. Even in my most infantile headspaces, I was still just playing a character. I was pooping. I felt my cheeks parting as a soft mass was slowly pushed out into the back of my diaper. The fact that it was so quiet almost made it seem more naughty to me–Lyndie probably wouldn’t know it was even happening until she could smell it. “Can I be honest with you for a second?” Lyndie asked as we approached the steps. I tried to hang back for a second, hoping she’d start walking up before I did–but she paused too, waiting for me to head up first. I felt my face tightening as I pushed a little, freeing the last of my load. “Y-you always are anyway,” I answered. “Go for it.” I sighed and started walking up the stairs–the back of my diaper packed full now. I felt like it stuck out in Lyndie’s face as she trailed behind me. “You’ve been spoiled,” she said, starting to ascend the steps. “You were lucky to find someone like Gabby, who had the means and the time to spend doting on you. But I’m not sure that was actually a good thing for you. This is the part of your life where you’re supposed to be out in the world. Learning from your mistakes. Finding yourself. You’ve just been hiding from it.” It didn’t happen often–but once in a while, a messy diaper just felt good. Like, not just ‘good’ in that big-baby-who-likes-poopy-diapers kind of way–but in a stimulating sort of way. It was the way the load had filled the back of my diaper, and the way that it pushed against my ass with every step. It caused my cock to swell in its cage–as much as it could, at least. A little noise escaped my lips–a faint whimper of pathetic pleasure. “I don’t begrudge you for living this life for as long as you have,” she continued. “But the longer you’re here, the harder it’s going to be for you to…” Her voice trailed off, and I could hear her sniffing the air. “Oh, Jesus. Clark, did you just poop yourself?” “Uh…” Somehow, her acknowledgment of it only made it feel even better. She sighed. “You know what? I take it all back. You’re a baby. A baby for life. There’s no coming back for you.” We cleared the steps and headed down the hallway. The nursery door was just ahead of us. It was so close–but it felt so far away too. It was the feeling of my diaper, combined with Lyndie’s reminder that I was a baby, that was helping to suck me into a very tiny headspace all of a sudden. I took a few more steps forward, but I decided that I didn’t want to walk anymore. I stopped, and dropped to my knees. “Clark? I still have to change you. So don’t you dare…” It was too late. I flopped backwards, landing on my dirty bottom, feeling an oozing squish between my skin and the diaper. I opened my mouth, but only to groan as I shifted my ass back and forth on the carpet, each movement sending pleasurable pulses up my spine and into my brain. “Are you serious right now?” Lyndie sighed, rolling her eyes. “Fine. Whatever. You might as well finish what you started. Go on. I’ll wait.” She towered above me, arms crossed in front of her as she looked down at my feeble attempts to grind my dirty diaper to a climax. There was a part of me that was ashamed–or, at least, a part of me that knew I probably should be ashamed. The rest was just drinking in the moment and getting drunk from it. A minute later, my caged cock was spitting up into the thick padding. “Do you even want a life where you can’t do that anymore?” she asked. All I could do was shrug. It didn’t seem fair that I had to choose.

I Don't Fucking Know. I held it together until I left the beach house. I held it together until I signed off on some of Erik's new paperwork. I held it together as I answered a few texts. I held it together until I made it to my room, and then I couldn't hold it together anymore. I started to cry. To really cry. I didn't sleep at all that night. Maybe that factors in a little bit. Is that a mistake? Is any of this? I don't even know anymore. I'm so fucking tired, and I'm so fucking scared. Because I don't know what is right or wrong. I get a wish. Justice reminded me to send it to the Magistrate, so that when it all went down, I'd be okay. I'd have everything I wanted. What I want was Judith. But how could I ever make up for all this? Even if I were to erase her memories, or mine? What would that guarantee? If she didn't have the trauma I'd caused, or the fetish I gave her, or the months of conditioning, would she ever love me? Could she ever even like me? And what about me? Before I met Judith, I hadn't wanted any of this. Was it because of the way we bonded? The way I played with her mind? The way I trapped her and tricked her and lied to her? Could I ever really love her, as her own person? As something other than what I made her? I keep going through it, over and over and over. I keep wondering what I could have done differently. What if I didn't reset Judith? Or what if I never used the marker that first time? What if I didn't lie about the hospital and the beach house? What if I saw my therapist? What if I never took Ai's case, or Bala's? What if I didn't let her have five of those free sex things, and last night never happened? What if we never kissed? What if I never let her write those letters to her dad? Would she have still wanted to write letters to me at Academy B? Would she have thought of writing me a letter last night too? Would she be powerful enough to break through the laws of physics that governed the Memoriam, just enough to slide a letter under the door? I found it on accident. I was meeting with Justice in the cafeteria and my feet went the long way around, out of habit. I almost didn't see it on the ground, in a white envelope. I almost didn't think to pick it up, but I thought Erik dropped it. I almost didn't read the front of it. Maria. And I almost didn't open it, because I was too fucking scared. But I did. Maria, I know there's something going on. Something big, right? And I get the feeling I'll never see you again. I hate that feeling. I hate to think that this letter is all there is left of you. But, well... I know you're lying to me. I've known for a long time, since... gosh, I don't know. Remember when we had our fight, and you left for a week? Things felt different after that, and I started to snoop. But I didn't like what I was finding. I didn't like thinking that everything we had was a lie. So I'm not going to think that, okay? Because the truth is, no matter what mistakes you've made, I still trust you to do what's right and good. Even if you haven't done that historically. Every day is a new chance to make the world a better place, and you've made my world a million times better. I know you don't believe me. I know you think I'm just saying this stuff, because you're really the only person I know anymore. But I promise. I feel at home here, not because this place looks like my family's beach house. But because there was the promise of you. So, I promise you... things will be okay. We'll be okay. See you soon, Nana. I love you. ~Judith Levin I shook my head. How? How could she still think like this? How can she have faith in me? Sure, she doesn't know the extent of what I've done. But come on! I'm just not a good person! I'm just not good! Why do you think I want this world to be different? Why do you think I need to change the entire fucking universe? Because, how else am I going to be a good person? How else can I change? According to Judith... just by trying. Just by doing what is right and good. How could that possibly make up for all the bad I've done? How can I justify all this, unless I get to the end? Unless I unravel everything and start from scratch? That's the only way to be better. That's the only way to be different! Right? Isn't it? I thought so. I've thought so for so long. And now Judith comes along, and I see the way she believes in me. The way she believes in everything. She wants to care just because she wants to. She wants to believe just because she wants to. But that isn't enough! Not for me! Not for normal people! We aren't angels! We aren't special! I'm not special... I'm not... How can she think I am? I don't... understand... anything... "Maria?" Justice got up from her seat and looked at me. With. Um. Concern? I don't know. My head was spinning. "Hey, Maria, are you okay?" Justice asked. She took a step forward but I shook my head. I folded the note and shoved it in the pocket of my dress. A nice dress. Not scrubs. Because I'm not a nurse anymore. Not anymore. "Sorry... I didn't sleep well," I said, taking a seat. Justice hesitated, then took a seat too. "Is this because of Ai?" Justice asked. "I didn't have anywhere else to put her." "Ai?" What the fuck did she have to do with anything? "Yeah? I transferred her here yesterday. Your signature is on the papers." "The... papers..." That thing Erik needed me to sign? I wasn't even reading it. Then... "Ai's here?" "Yep, room twelve. We just needed her out of the way while we set up for Eden." "Eden." Right. We decided on that name months ago. The new world. Eden. "It shouldn't be long. A few weeks, maybe a month. We are prepping the Star." "So... we decided?" I asked. "Who is going to be God?" "Her name is Ayoka," Justice said. "She was at Academy A. Top student. Highly responsive to praise. She's perfect. Just wait until you meet her." "Ayoka..." The name of my soon-to-be maker. Not many people can say that. "Yep. You're going to introduce her to Bala, and we'll go from there. Honestly, I'm feeling really good about this." "Yeah..." "You sure you're alright, Maria?" The funny thing is, if I knew more about Justice, maybe I would have been honest with her. Maybe if I hadn't forgotten everything we had, I would have felt like I could have leaned on her a little. But I didn't. So I shook my head and faked a smile. "I'm okay." I was always a very good liar. "Well, get your stuff and let's get out of here," Justice said. "And don't forget your marker. I've collected all the others, and Eli is meeting us there." "Yeah, uh. Let me get my bag." I agreed to meet Justice out front of Academy M and made my way back toward my room. The long way around. I stopped at Judith's door and checked her monitor. She was sitting in the living room, watching Oliver and Company. I put my back to the wall and looked up at the ceiling. I'd never see her again... It was selfish to go in there. It would only hurt both of us. But one more look at her, one more kiss, one more touch... I could let her leave. She could run. Maybe find a way to escape rapture. But not even an Arcana could do that. Even if she could, I didn't even have time to explain, let alone point her in the right direction. The right direction. I looked down the hall. It was empty. Everyone was evacuating Academy M. There was no point running any of the Academies anymore, now that we had what we needed. I reached forward and touched Judith's door. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry I'm not a better person. You deserved a better person." I kissed the front of her door, leaving a smear of red lipstick. Then I turned and headed down the hall. I'm not special, but Judith is. And if Judith thinks there's something good about me, then maybe I'm the one that's wrong. I slid all the sliders on my tablet to one side and clipped the marker to the top of it. The cap started changing colors, vacillating between every shade of the rainbow, even as I disconnected it. The marker was hot to the touch, and I had to quickly slide it into my breast pocket before it hurt my fingers. I dropped my tablet on the ground without a care and shoved open the last door in the hall. Room twelve. I was accosted by bright green trees and bushes. Thousands of flowers. Millions of them. A veritable forest, right out of a fairy tale. And in the center of a clearing, right in front of me, was a bed. On it, sound asleep, was Ai Sinclair. I took a few steps forward. The trees seemed to bend away from me in fear. I approached the little bed, framed in hard wood and vines of unusual flowers. Ai was dressed in a beautiful blue gown, dripping like waterfalls over the sides of her altar. She looked so peaceful, so serene. I stepped up to her and brushed the hair out of her face. Short hair. Hair I'd cut. Then I slapped her. Not hard. Just gently, on the cheek. "I could kill you a million different ways right now," Ai said under her breath. "Do it then, and get this over with." Ai's eyes blinked open and she looked up at me. Then she sat up. And as she did, the flowers began to wilt. The leaves fell from the trees and the wood began to rot. The whole world around us fell apart. Then, it was gone altogether. The dark gray grew brighter and brighter. It was just us, dressed in matching white dresses, in a vast sea of white. The only discernible feature was the altar Ai was still sitting upon, speckled with budding seeds. “It was bold of you to come here," Ai said, because it was her world. She had control over everything in the Memoriam. Her Memoriam. "I wanted to talk," I said. "Right. And reset me again? Mind-wipe me? Turn me off? Well, you did it. You finally found a place I can't escape from. No matter what I do. No matter what I make." That was because Judith was the access point, a security feature. Also, one of the reasons it was so important that I keep her in check. As long as she felt she couldn't leave, then no other candidate could leave either. The Memoriam was Ai's playground and her tomb. "No, Ai," I said. "It's over. The Academy has what it needs." "The Star, the Chariot." "So you remember?" "Kione helped," Ai shrugged. "With everything she taught me, you can't reset me anymore. I remember everything. I remember everything you did to me too." "Yeah, and you know..." I sighed and crossed my arms. "I'm sorry. I'm... actually sorry." "Bullshit." "I thought what I was doing was right," I said. "I thought it was necessary. I still do, kind of. I feel like... nothing can change unless everything does. That the whole world is so big and impossible. That I'm so... impossible..." "Well, I hope your new life is as shitty and awful as this one was," Ai said sharply. "Yeah, I deserve that, I guess." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the marker. Ai visibly stiffened. She could have tried to take it from me, but coming anywhere near that marker was dangerous for her. So she kept her cool. "I'm not going to hurt you," I said. "I wanted to ask a favor, actually." Ai glared at me. She didn't believe me. She never believed me. Why would this be any different? I sighed. "To be honest, I'm scared," I said. "Because we're all so erratic, as human beings. Because everything we want can change so quickly. But we change so slowly. I've been wanting to be a better person for years, but I feel like today is the first time I might actually be. Because I'm sorry. Because what I did to you was wrong, and... and my intentions aren't an excuse. But I want to make it up to you, if you'll let me." Ai didn't say anything, so I held up the marker and kept talking. "Usually we use the markers to work in our favor, but I think I can do the opposite. I think, the way I set this one up... it can help you fight against the Academy." "Or kill me," Ai said flatly. "Sure, or kill you," I sighed. "But I'm hoping it's the first one." Ai stared at me for a moment, crossing her arms. "Why do you want me to help me all of a sudden?" "I have no fucking idea," I said, angry at myself for my own inconsistencies. My whole life, I had been afraid of doing the wrong thing. I didn't want to make any mistakes. I didn't want to learn to be better, because I wanted to be the best at everything right away. But the only things I was ever good at were hurtful. Lying. Manipulating. Twisting the world to fit my narrative, to make me the hero. Everything I did had a reason, a purpose. Everything I did was worth it. I thought Judith was a mistake. I thought letting her write those letters was a mistake. I thought her kissing me was a mistake, and showing her any kind of true emotion was a mistake. I thought loving her was a mistake. But if I never did those things, then I would never have learned. I would never have realized that things didn't have to be like this. "Maybe people who would do this to people," I said, “people like me... we shouldn't be in charge of the new world." "And I should be?" Ai asked. "Absolutely not," I said sourly. "But you're the Magician. If anyone can make a difference this late in the game, it's you." We were both quiet for a long time. I uncapped the marker, still swirling with colors, and nearly dropped it from the heat. The tip was a metal ball, strung together with wire and coils. The space around it - even in Ai's Memoriam - was distorted and fractured, like broken mirrors. We both stared at the marker, then at each other. "Well..." I said. "What'll it be?" With a deep sigh, and with a clear mind, Ai took a step toward me. And in return, I took a step toward her. That step was the biggest I have ever taken, and the biggest I'll ever take. A step toward something harder, something scarier. A step toward betterment. [End]

All Hortensia could do when she opened her eyes was cry. She couldn’t move. The pain was intolerable. She had tried to sit up, but it felt like everything was ripping open inside her. She could feel something warm and thicker than urine sliding in between her butt cheeks. Blood. Fear gripped her. All she could picture was a nappy full of gore. They had tried to hide it from her, but she had seen. It had bled a lot when she had scratched the odd lump she found open a couple of nights ago as well. “Miss Honey!” She cried out. Her voice had a panicked whine she didn’t recognize. Miss Honey bolted up, took one look at her face and lunged for the pill bottle. “Water…water…I’ll get you some more.” She ran to the bathroom and came back with a little cup. Hortensia raised herself to her elbows and swallowed the pill down. “It broke open! I’m bleeding!!” she cried. Miss Honey ripped the blankets off her and yanked the nappy open in the back before letting it slide back into place. “You’re okay, sweetheart.” Miss Honey said softly behind her head. “You’re not bleeding anymore.” “But I can feel it! It opened up when I tried to move!” “It’s not blood, it’s alright. You’re okay.” It’s not blood. It wasn’t, there’s nothing there. “Were you able to get any sleep?” The woman's hand had begun stroking her hair. Hortensia shook her head, too busy trying to fight back down the frightened tears to answer. She must have dozed off at one point because Miss Honey had no longer been reading to her, but had been asleep beside her. Most of Hortensia’s night had been spent listening to Miss Honey talk in her sleep. In any other circumstance it would have been amusing. Matilda hadn’t been kidding. You really could have a whole conversation with her in her sleep. “I’m sorry.” The hand that had been running through her hair was yanked away. “I promised I wouldn’t push myself on you and here I am doing just that.” “Do I have to go to school today?” Hortensia asked into the pillow. “It really hurts!” “No, honey, don’t worry about school right now. You need time to heal.” Hortensia let out a relieved breath. She had been dreading school all night. How could she be expected to sit still in a hard plastic chair all day? She could hardly push herself up. “Do you want to try getting up?” She did not. She shook her head and closed her eyes. “You need to get cleaned up sweetheart, you can’t stay like that. It will only make it hurt worse.” Hortensia grimaced and pulled the blanket up over her head. “Tell you what, let me go say good morning to everyone and call the school. Then I’ll come back and we’ll get you in the shower. How’s that sound? It’ll give you a chance to get your bearings a bit before we get you on your feet.” Hortensia grunted in acknowledgement. Anything so she could go back to sleep. “Don’t fall asleep; I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Sure. Sure. “Tens, sweetheart. It’s time to get up.” The blanket was pulled off her. Hortensia’s eyes slowly opened. “You don’t want a rash on top of everything else.” Psh. A rash. What was a rash compared to everything else? “Give me your hand. We’ll take it nice and slow.” Reluctantly, she grabbed for Miss Honey’s offered arm and pulled herself into a sitting position. “That’s it. How do you feel?” “Dizzy.” Hortensia mumbled. The infernal burning had turned into a dull ache. “Hold onto my arm, you’re almost up. Take your time.” As Hortensia was making her way to her feet, she was aware of more warmth accompanied by a faint noise, like a wet gurgle. She could feel the color draining from her face. She let out a strangled cry. Miss Honey’s eyes darted left and right, searching for the source until they finally fell on her. “Are you sure it’s not blood?” Hortensia asked in a small shaky voice. “It happened when I tried to get up.” “Doctor said that could happen if you strain.” Miss Honey said gently. “I wasn’t pushing it out!” “No, not straining to go, but straining your body, like if you cough or sneeze. The muscle in charge of keeping everything… contained needs a bit of R and R and is taking a little break. I know it’s out of your control right now.” “I can’t go to school like this!” “I told you not to worry about school. One thing at a time.” She was led by the arm into the bathroom where Miss Honey turned on the faucet. She stared at her for a moment as she shuffled around. “Do you think you’ll need any help?” Hortensia remained silent. It was a simple question, but she couldn’t get herself to say no. Her mind had gone blank. She didn’t want to make a decision or answer any questions, she just wanted to go back to bed. “Tens?” She could feel her eyes begin to well with tears. “It’s alright, honey, let me help you.” “I want to lie down.” Her body felt heavy and sluggish, like she was moving underwater. She felt her shirt get lifted over her head, leaving her standing naked except for the soiled nappy. “Soon. You don’t have to take a full shower, I’m just going to rinse you off. It’ll be real quick. See? Look at this.” Miss Honey eagerly pulled the shower head off the holder. “They make detachable ones now!” “Yeah,” Hortensia mumbled as Miss Honey let it dangle on its cord. “We had one at the house. I had to hose Matilda down with it.” “Hmm, maybe we should get Matilda to come clean you up, seems only fair.” “No!” “I’m only joking.” Miss Honey said gently. “I wouldn’t do that to you.” Hortensia watched her dig around in a couple cabinets before tearing a plastic bag off a roll. “Go on and step in.” She clung to Miss Honey’s arm for balance as she slowly lifted a leg over the rim of the tub before repeating the process, wincing with pain as she did so. Miss Honey held the bag open in front of her. Hortensia stared at it, then up at the woman who flashed her a sympathetic smile. “For the nappy.” Hortensia reached for the tabs and froze. Another gory image crossed her mind. Panic welled within her and she shut her eyes, sure now more than ever Miss Honey had lied to her. Her throat constricted with emotion. “Do you want me to do it?” Hortensia nodded her head, eyes still shut tight. She heard the crinkle and rip of the tabs. “Oh, this isn’t bad.” “Is there blood?” “Is that what you're afraid of?” “I’m not scared.” Hortensia said, though her voice came out sounding meek and fearful. “There’s a little bit, but it’s nothing like it was.” Miss Honey said. “Do you want to see?” Hortensia shook her head. She could hear crinkling plastic before feeling warm water begin to spray at her waist. “Does the water feel okay? It’s not too hot or cold?” “It’s fine.” Hortensia mumbled. Miss Honey turned her this way and that, but Hortensia still refused to open her eyes. “Do you want to try going potty?” Hortensia thought of the toilet, imagined sitting on it, imagined organs coming out. “No.” she whimpered. She was starting not to care if Miss Honey thought she was being childish. She wished her curiosity hadn’t gotten the best of her when Miss Honey collapsed. She had nearly lost it herself. She had even puked all down the front of her gown. “Are you sure? You were dry. You must need to pee.” She did. The running water wasn’t helping. She let out another scared whimper and nodded. “That’s what I thought. I’ll dry you off and you can sit on the toilet for a bit.” She adamantly shook her head. That would make her organs come out easier. “Are you hurting too much for that?” She nodded. It wasn’t a complete lie. It did hurt, but the pill had kicked in now. It didn’t eliminate the pain, but it took the edge off, made her feel less like she had taken a jagged knife up her arse and more like she had had the biggest, dryest shit of her life. “It’s alright, you can pee there, just, can you turn to the side and squat down? I don’t trust that booty of yours. Hold on to the railing with your other hand. That’s it. You can open your eyes, there’s nothing to be afraid of, sweetheart.” Hortensia shook her head again and slowly lowered herself down sobbing as she did so. She had only meant to pee, but her back end had relaxed as well and she could feel it burning as it exited her. Hot blood. She began to sob harder. “It’s okay, you’re okay.” Miss Honey kept whispering. “It’s only liquid. You’re not hurting anything. Go on and let anything that needs to come out, come out.” She was too afraid to push. What if a piece of her was only hanging by a thread? What if that was all it took? What if she started pooping out an intestine? She had to feel herself just to be sure nothing was hanging out, letting out a hiss of regret. “No, no. Don’t touch. Try and keep your hands off. I know it’s hard when you know you’re not supposed to.” Hortensia slowly opened her eyes and stared up at her. “There’s those pretty blue eyes. It’s okay. Are you all done?” Hortensia nodded and pulled herself up. Miss Honey rinsed her off with the shower head one more time before shutting off the water. She dried her off with frantic speed and led her back to the bedroom. Probably afraid I’m going to shit on the floor, Hortensia thought. Yep. She was pulling out another nappy and motioning for her to lie down. The other ones were better, she mused. These reminded her of hospitals and old folks' homes. What was that word Matilda used to describe old people? Geriatric. “Do you want to put your medicine on, or do you want me to do it?” Hortensia motioned for her to do it and closed her eyes. Bed. Her eyes popped open as Miss Honey began applying something cold somewhere she was just told not to touch. She’d do it herself next time. “This is Lidocaine, it’s going to help take away some of that burn.” She felt the sprinkle of powder before the sides came up. Now she could go back to sleep. “Do you want to come downstairs or do you want to sleep?” Hortensia slowly rolled over into her sleeping position. “Sleep.” she said into the pillow. There was added weight to the mattress as Miss Honey sat down beside her. She opened her eyes and stared up at her. “Can I ask what’s scaring you at this moment?” Miss Honey asked. “It’s dumb.” “I very much doubt it's dumb if it got you this worked up.” “I-I keep thinking it’s blood and intestines coming out.” Hortensia admitted. “I saw, last night, after you fell.” “Oh, sweetheart, no, that’s not dumb. That scared me too. And when you said you thought it had opened up and was bleeding… I’ve never been so happy to look down a child's pants and see poo.” Miss Honey said with a smile. Hortensia let out something between a laugh and a sob. “If it makes you feel any better I don’t think...” Matilda wandered into the room. “You can poop out your intestines.” she finished. Matilda stared at them with a look that said what conversation did I just walk into? “Your butt hole can turn inside out.” Matilda offered. “It’s called a prolapsed anus.” “Matilda!” Miss Honey hissed. “Not the time!” “You’re the one talking about pooping out organs! And it’s not like we're eating.” Miss Honey sighed and shook her head before whispering, “Get some sleep. I’ll be back to check on you in a bit.” … Jennifer was about to ask Matilda how her night was when Hazel appeared at the landing. “Daddy’s making breakfast.” She screamed up the stairs. Jennifer winced. Too early. How could such small kids yell so loud? Breakfast was a sweet gesture, but Jennifer didn’t think she could eat. Her stomach was still churning after dealing with Hortensia. She was proud of herself for not gagging in front of her. It wasn’t Tens’s fault Jennifer was squeamish. She sighed. She survived her first poopy nappy, she just didn’t think it would be for a pre-teen. “I’m not hungry, but thank you.” She said when she sat down at the kitchen table. Brian was at the stove making everyone pancakes. “How is she?” He asked. Jennifer put her head in her hands and shook it. She was so terrified of seeing blood she kept her eyes shut and cried the entire time. Her throat constricted. “She’s overwhelmed.” Jennifer managed to croak out. Brian sat back down at the table and let out a heavy sigh. “I couldn’t stop thinking about Hazel last night.” Brian said softly. “Who am I letting around her? Do I really know them? It wasn’t just The Neighbors, it was her moms best friends.” I’ve had to rely on people to watch her a lot this year. To think it was the person you trusted the most.” “I suppose that's why Eve’s pointing the finger at you, easier to believe it's a stranger.” “Pointing the finger about what?” Matilda asked. Jennifer went quiet. Little ears were listening. “About what?” Matilda asked again, more frustrated. She didn’t like being treated like a child. But this wasn’t something she was going to share with the kids. “Eve thinks she picked something up while she was staying with us.” Jennifer said. “But I think she picked it up from the neighbors. If she picked it up there, that means she gets to live with us.” “But what if she got sick here?” Hazel asked. Her eyes locked with Brian’s. “Then someone’s going to die.” She said softly. Brian chuckled nervously. “I believe it. You were pretty angry last night.” They could hurt her, but touch her children and there would be hell to pay. “But don’t worry, we know she didn’t get sick here, because the test shows she has had a history of getting sick at home.” “That’s sad.” Brian said. Matilda wrinkled her nose. “Is this what’s been making her poop her pants? Your room smelled like a barn.” Jennifer scowled as the girls giggled. “Matilda, I need you to be mature about this.” She never thought she’d be telling Matilda to be more mature. “Tens is very sick and can’t help it. She needs our love and support right now.” “Okay.” Matilda mumbled. “And whatever happened between you two. I need you to let it go.” Matilda remained silent. “I’m serious. She really needs a friend right now.” “Fine.” Matilda grumbled. "Do you think Hortensia will want any pancakes?” Brian asked. “Oh, no, she’s slee-” “Yeah.” Jennifer snapped her head up to find Hortensia standing in the kitchen entrance wearing a very mismatched skirt and blouse from her closet. “What are you wearing?” Matilda giggled. “I don’t have any clothes.” Hortensia said. “I’m not coming down naked, so I guess I’m a teacher today.” “A blind teacher.” Matilda giggled. Jennifer was surprised she had come down at all. She looked wobbly on her feet, with a glazed look in her eyes. “I thought you wanted to sleep.” she jumped up and offered her her seat. Hortensia slowly eased herself down. Jennifer heard a soft crinkle and breathed a sigh of relief. That was her favorite skirt. “I heard there was food. I’m starving.” Hortensia mumbled. “Haven’t eaten since yesterday.” “Yeah, that’s how breakfast works.” Matilda snorted. “Of course you’d come down for food.” “Meant lunch.” She sat hunched over, eyes closed, head held up by her palm. “It’s hard to talk.” “You can take my seat.” Brian said, returning to the stove. “How many would you like? Three? Four?” “One.” Hortensia said. “I thought you said you were starving?” Matilda scoffed. Jennifer frowned with concern. She had seen Hortensia eat. She had been feeding her all summer. It was like feeding a horse. “Are you sure you only want one?” she asked. Hortensia nodded. “How about two? Do you think you could eat two?” Hortensia shrugged. “Two it is.” Brian said. “Jenny?” “Fine, I'll eat one.” “Two it is.” Brian repeated. When he set a plate of them down in front of her she nearly gagged. They had large brown spots all over them. Not the best morning for chocolate chips. “They're good!” Matilda exclaimed. And they were. Jennifer set her fork down with a groan. “I haven’t had this much sugar for breakfast since the time Matilda tried to roofie us.” Jennifer said. “Umm, what?” Brian asked. “You know, when she mixed in those edibles. I told you the story.” Brian’s lips creased into a tight line as he avoided eye contact. “That’s not what ‘roofie’ means.” He whispered the rest in her ear. Nope. Nope. That’s not what happened. But there was something about that… Her vision began to swim. He was handing her a flask, telling her to drink it. “It’ll help you relax. It’ll hurt if you don’t relax.” “No, please don’t!” He grabbed her by the back of her hair and pulled her head up. He began to pour something like extra bitter grape juice in her mouth. She swallowed it down and choked. “I just wanted you to get me out!” she cried as she backed up as far as she could away from him. “I’ll get you out, I just want a small favor first.” “Jenny?” Brian asked. “Are you okay?” “Yeah, yeah. I just ate too much.” Jennifer said. “I think I need to sit on the couch for a bit.” She looked over at Hortensia’s plate. She had barely eaten. “Did you not like them?” “You nearly licked the batter bowl last time I made these.” Brian said. “Wasn’t hungry after all.” Hortensia mumbled. “Do you want to go back up stairs?” Jennifer asked. Hortensia shook her head. She looked like she was going to drop. “Do you want to come sit on the couch with me?” Hortensia nodded. “Yeah, let’s go sit down.” She grabbed her lightly from under the arms and helped her to her feet. “Why are you making that face?” Matilda asked. “Cause it hurts.” Hortensia grumbled. “I thought you were sick.” Matilda scowled. “Matilda, can you get the dishes, please.” Jennifer asked to distract her. “Can I use my powers?” “Yes, fine.” Matilda let out a woop and dishes began to fly. “That never gets old.” Brian said. “It does.” Several voices said at once. Jennifer stopped in her tracks. Her living room was full of ghosts. Jacob, Amber, Billy, and three boys she didn’t recognize. They all stared at her expectantly, in various stages of thereness. All the boys were transparent, but both Billy and Jacob seemed to be barely visible, almost blinking in and out of existence. The only one who seemed the most whole was Amber. Jennifer wondered if it was because she was the most recent. Had time taken away the other's lifeforce? “It’s a little crowded here.” Jennifer mumbled. “What?” Matilda asked. She looked around the room. “There’s no one here.” Her face fell. “Are you telling me to leave?” “No. No, sweetheart, you’re fine. Why don’t you put on a movie for Tens. Something happy.” They had been collecting more and more family friendly VHS tapes from yard sales. Didn’t want another episode of walking in on the kids watching Silence of the Lambs again. She had had to explain to Hazel it wasn’t actually about baby sheep. Matilda had been sent to her room for putting it on knowing full well it was not a farm movie like Babe or Charlotte's Web. “Land Before Time?” Matilda suggested. “That’s not happy.” Hortensia mumbled. “Not Littlefoot's mom. That makes me cry.” Hazel said. Matilda’s face paled. Of all the movies she could have picked… Jennifer dug through her stack of videos. Fox and the Hound? No, not the scene of Todd being left in the forest. Charlotte’s Web? No, she dies and the babies leave him. The Never Ending Story? That gave Matilda nightmares about horses for weeks. Homeward Bound, Forrest Gump, Air Bud. Why were all these so depressing? “The Princess Bride, Hook or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?” “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!” Hazel exclaimed, jumping up and down as she karate chopped the air. “Hey! Settle down!” Brian said, walking in from the kitchen. “Let Hortensia pick since she’s not feeling well.” “Nightmare.” Was all Hortensia had managed to get out. Nightmare Before Christmas it is, Jennifer thought, looking for the case amongst the pile she had amassed over the summer. She looked down and groaned. “Girls, you need to rewind the tapes after you finish watching them.” She slipped out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but that too was unwound. She slipped it in the VCR just in case she got it backwards, but the credits popped up on the screen when she hit Play. Matilda bent and picked up The Nightmare Before Christmas. “Race you.” she said, gripping the tape in both hands. “Let’s see who's faster, the VCR or me.” Jennifer’s eyes flickered to the eager faces, both living and dead. She hit rewind. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles won by a landslide. Matilda couldn’t use her powers without moving her eyes. They kept going round and round with the tape. Hazel, Matilda and four dead boys sat on the floor in front of the telly. “You can stretch out on the couch if that’s easier for you.” Jennifer said, taking a seat on the couch. “If you put your head in my lap you can lay down.” Hortensia seemed to weigh her options before slowly easing herself down. “There you go.” The girl leaned against her shoulder, but seemingly ran out of gas and stopped. It didn’t look very comfortable, so Jennifer re-positioned her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder so that she was cradling her against her chest. Hortensia’s eyes had closed and within minutes, she had fallen asleep in her arms. She absentmindedly brushed her fingers through Hortensia’s hair as she studied her features. She thought of the girl trembling in fear in her bathtub and sighed. Matilda had gotten bored with the movie and had wandered away, Brian was asleep in the armchair, but Hazel and the ghosts were watching intently. Amber was sitting on the arm of the chair beside him staring longingly at her daughter. It was the first time Jennifer had seen her not preoccupied with the only two living people who could interact with her. She was different from the other ghosts, she was still non corporeal, but she could interact with objects and touch her while the others could not. “Hey, Hazel.” Jennifer said. The girl bent her head backwards to look up at her. “Why don’t you go get in your daddy's lap.” The little girl stood and catapulted herself into Brian. Not quite what she had meant. Jennifer winced as Brian let out a startled cry of pain, but she couldn’t keep the amused grin off her face. “Hi,” Brian said. Hazel was giggling but suddenly stopped. “It got cold all of a sudden. Is the AC on?” He asked. Jennifer shook her head. Amber was trying to hold them both. His face suddenly fell. “Is it okay that she’s getting into that stuff?” Jennifer looked away from the bittersweet scene and followed his gaze. Matilda was sitting cross legged on the floor going through the contents of a bag. Hortensia’s hospital bag. She was reading through the after visit summary. “Matilda! Get out of there!” Jennifer shouted, but the look on the girl's face told her it was too late. She had already seen. “That’s not a stomach virus.” Matilda said. “No, it’s not.” Jennifer said softly. “Get out of that stuff, come sit with us.” “What-” Matilda started to ask, but Jennifer put a finger to her lips and pointed at Tens, who was fast asleep in her arms. Matilda stared at the two of them for a long time. “Does this bother you?” Jennifer asked. Matilda was silent for a moment before shaking her head. Jennifer scooted over as much as she could leaving a small gap between her and the armrest. She patted the spot, Matilda stared at her for a moment before laughing. “I’m not going to fit.” But she climbed up anyway and made herself fit. Jennifer put an arm around her and held both girls tightly against her chest. “How?” Matilda whispered. “I don’t know.” Jennifer whispered back. “Hasn’t she said?” “Let’s not talk about this.” Jennifer said. Brian stretched before meeting her eyes. “I’m going to do that test today.” Brian announced. “Would it be too much trouble to leave Hazel here with you? I know you have your hands full.” “Not at all.” Jennifer said. “What test? I like tests.” Matilda said. “Only you.” Hortensia mumbled, eyes still shut tight. “I don’t think you’d like this test.” Brian said. “It’s a medical test.” “Oh.” Matilda said.. “Do you really have to stick a q-tip in your ure-” “Okay, no more of that topic.” Jennifer said. “I knew I shouldn’t have let you read Carol’s old textbooks.” “Yeah, that…that’s umm…” Brian scratched at his head before shuddering again. “Unsettling.” he mumbled. “I like knowing stuff.” Matilda said with a shrug. “I know you do, but it’s a very inappropriate topic for you to be spouting off about.” Jennifer said. “Especially at your age, and in front of the other children.” She waved her hand amongst the sea of confused faces. “Hazel is a child, not children.” Matilda said. “Remember what I told you about keeping topics age appropriate.” Matilda rolled her eyes. “And not asking Brian inappropriately personal questions.” “Fine.” Matilda grumbled. “I think it’s a blood test.” Brian said before adding. “I hope.” His eyes darted from Jennifer to Hortensia. “Is that what they stole my blood for?” Hortensia mumbled. Brian visibly relaxed. “Maybe.” Jennifer said. “Are you going now?” “Yeah, best to get it out of the way. Peace of mind,” he looked around the room. “For everyone.” Jennifer wanted to assure him she didn’t think it was him, but still, she’d feel better about his presence around the kids with hard evidence. Her mind had been haunting her with “what iff’s” since she heard of Eve’s accusations and it scared her. Scared her that the possibility of Brian being a predator had never crossed her mind even once. She really had sent someone else's child off with him without a second thought. No wonder Eve was angry with her. Would she have thought twice about it if it had been Matilda? When had she let her guard down so much? Because he had kids? Or was she just being biased because she had fallen in lo- “What?” Brian asked. “What’s that face for?” “N-nothing.” She said quickly. She busied herself by kissing each girl's head. Once Brian had let himself out, and the movie had ended, Hazel’s attention had turned back to them. “Where’d daddy go?” Hazel asked. The girl had been so transfixed with the screen she had tuned out Brian’s goodbye’s and explanations. “He has to go get blood work done.” Jennifer said. “He hopes.” Matilda snickered. “Why?” Hazel asked. “To make sure he’s not sick.” Jennifer said. “Why?” “Because Tens is sick and we need to know where it came from.” “One time, this girl came to Sunday School sick and she got everyone else sick too.” Hazel shared. “It’s important to stay home if you're not feeling well.” “I hate church.” Hortensia mumbled. “They make me go.” “Was never a fan of it myself.” Jennifer admitted. “You’d never know Miss Trunchbull was deeply religious, but she was.” “The pews hurt my butt, and it’s boring.” Hortensia mumbled. Jennifer patted her back. She finally didn’t say arse. Small miracles. “Are we going to school today?” Matilda asked. “Not today. You girls might be doing school work at home, or Hortensia will be joining us in my office.” “Why?” Matilda asked with a frown. “Because she’s not feeling well and it hurts her to sit.” “Syphilis doesn’t hurt.” Matilda said. “Faker.” “There’s sores in my butt.” Hortensia said softly. “They hurt.” And on the front. “Matilda,” Jennifer hissed. “She is not faking it. And how would you know if it hurts or not?” “Sure.” Matilda said unconvinced. “Because I read. The sores aren’t itchy or painful.” “It does if you scratch it open.” Hortensia groaned. “It’s infected.” Jennifer said. How she had even found it in order to scratch it open Jennifer couldn’t understand. It was a knuckle deep, at least. No way she had found it wiping, like she had said. But would Jennifer have been able to get her out from their care in time if she hadn’t been in pain? Probably not. “Oh.” Matilda said. “Your infection…got infected?” “Something like that.” Jennifer said. “Let’s not talk about this right now.” Not in front of Hazel. “I’m sorry I laughed at you for getting a tube up your butt.” Hortensia lamented. “It hurt so bad!” “Why’d you get a tube up your butt?” Matilda asked, face wrinkled in disgust. “Remember what happened when you were constipated?” Jennifer whispered. Matilda shuddered. “What did they do that for? We all know you can poop just fine.” Matilda snickered. “Stop it.” Jennifer hissed. “Miss Honey fainted.” Hortensia said with a soft chuckle. “You did?” Matilda asked, shocked. “Why?” “I, umm, got a little woozy.” She figured it was a mix of seeing the blood and hearing Hortensia screaming in pain. “They put it in wrong and cut me.” Hortensia said. “A whole bunch of blood came out.” Matilda’s face paled. “That’s because you jumped when they put it in. It’s a very sensitive area. The slightest thing could open it up, that’s why it’s important to lie still. ” She held up one of Hortensia’s arms, which was covered in bruises from the Iv line. “How many times did they try to put an Iv in before they got it?” “Twelve!” Hortensia hissed. “And were you lying still and letting them try?” Hortensia grumbled under her breath. She’d take that as a no. Thankfully, the subject had soon changed. Jennifer was in the middle of listening to Hazel’s description of her classroom when she felt moisture on her arm. She looked down and found Hortensia’s face buried in the crook of her arm. She had either fallen back asleep and started drooling or… Jennifer could see her body violently rising and falling with choked sobs. “Honey, are you okay?” Jennifer whispered as she rubbed her back. “Do you need a change?” she asked after a pause. Hortensia shook her head. “Did the pain pill wear off already?” She looked at the clock. She couldn’t have any more for at least another hour. Again, she shook her head. “Would you tell me what’s wrong?” Shake. “Matilda, could you take Hazel up to your room and play?” She watched as the girls slowly ascended the stairs and turned her attention back to the distraught lump in her lap. She had started off leaning against her chest, but over the course of the morning, she had slowly dragged herself into Jennifer’s lap without her noticing. All promises of Jennifer keeping her hands to herself had gone out the window. It had been a dumb thing to say anyway. Hortensia wasn’t an adult who needed space, she was a child. A broken child who needed to be loved and comforted. “Please talk to me.” Jennifer whispered, running her fingers through Hortensia’s hair. “E-e-e-very-thing’s a-a-always m-my f-f-f-ault!” Hortensia sobbed. “No, Tens, this isn’t your fault.” Jennifer said softly. “It’s my fault for picking at it! It’s my fault it bled! It’s my fault they couldn’t get the Iv in!” “Sweetheart, I wasn’t blaming you. I just wanted you to understand why you need to stay still. I know it’s hard to do when you’re scared. I’m sorry I made it seem like I was blaming you.” Hortensia didn’t respond, only cried until she didn’t have the energy left in her to cry anymore. “You’ve been strong for so long.” Jennifer whispered when Hortensia had finally settled down. “How have you been keeping this to yourself all this time?” She didn’t answer. “When I was only a few years older than you, I asked a very large man for help. Instead of rescuing me, he took advantage of me.” Jennifer explained. “What do you mean?” Hortensia mumbled. “He raped me, and the person who was supposed to look after me let him.” Jennifer said. “Does this sound anything like your situation?” Hortensia shook her head. “So Cynthia wasn’t letting Aiden…” Hortensia shook her head again. “I wasn’t raped.” Hortensia said. Jennifer shut her eyes. Hortensia didn’t understand. She was in denial. “Whatever he told you, whatever he made you believe to get you to agree, it was still rape. It’s called grooming.” Hortensia shook her head. “They got it wrong. I wasn’t raped. I’ve never been raped.” Jennifer frowned. “Sweetheart, even if you agreed to have sex…” The doctor had told her it was definitely an adult. “I’ve never had sex.” Hortensia said. “I didn’t even know what sex was until Mrs. Rodgers gave me that talk.” she shuddered. “Tens, you don’t need to lie anymore. You’re not in trouble, you’re safe.” “I’m not lying! I- I don’t, I don’t know what’s going on!” Fresh tears were sprouting in her eyes. So Jennifer did need to explain. “Tens, you have a sexually transmitted infection. Those sores came from someone else who has sores. Their genitals had to have come into contact with yours. And no, you couldn’t have gotten it from a toilet seat or bath water. Whether you agreed to it or not, they are in the wrong. An adult did this.” Hortensia looked confused. “I didn’t.” Hortensia said. “What about when you were little? When you told people Aiden…” Hortensia shook her head. “I was stupid and didn’t know what ‘rape’ meant. I had heard the word and asked mom what it meant. She said it was when someone touches you when you don’t want them to. Aiden was tickling me and I didn’t want him to…” “And no one explained?” “Everyone started making a big deal out of it. I was too scared I’d get in trouble to explain. Mom took me to the doctor, and they said it didn’t happen. Then I had to go to church for counseling, and they said I had made it up because I was upset over dad leaving us.” “So then Aiden…” Hortensia shook her head. Jennifer wasn’t sure she believed her. Was she protecting him? “Tens, I’m going to be blunt with you. Someone raped you, repeatedly. We know this for a fact, there is no mistake.” “But…no. I couldn’t have been. I’d know.” “Yes, honey.” She could hear the phone ringing. “I need to get that. It’s probably your mom.” “Don’t tell her.” Hortensia mumbled into Jennifer’s arm. “She already knows.” Hortensia reluctantly wiggled out of her lap and Jennifer raced upstairs to get the cordless phone. She winced as the prerecorded message played from the jail. It was Eve alright. She accepted the charges and tore the phone away from her ear. “JENNIFER! WHERE IS MY DAUGHTER?” The voice on the other end of the line screamed. “She’s here.” Jennifer said once she thought it was safe to put the phone to her ear again. “She’s with me.” “And your boyfriend…?” She growled. “It isn’t him!” Jennifer defended, but stopped. “He’s getting tested now. He’s not here. I’m not taking any chances.” “You keep him away from my daughter!” “Eve, it’s Aiden.” She said softly. “Is that what she told you?” Eve demanded. “Well, no, but-” “It’s. Not. Aiden! You think I don’t keep an eye on who I let watch my only daughter?” “I-I’m not saying that, but-” “He tested negative.” Eve said. Jennifer felt her stomach fall. If not him…who?

Chapter 5: About That Favor I woke to the sound of claws being dragged across wood. Chester was scratching at the door, his paws all the way past the doorknob. The cat was a master of breaking into my bedroom. Getting out of it, not so much. He dropped his paws to the ground, turned around to glare at me, and let out a loud, high-pitched meow. I rolled over as if to move to the side of the bed, only to find myself completely tangled up in a sleeping bag. I looked around for my friends – Angie and Emma – but they were nowhere to be found. But I was on the floor in a sleeping bag. And I only slept in those during sleepovers. So where exactly were they? Oh, wait. The events of last night came back to me. The struggle to get my bladder to release. The flooded sheets after I had finally managed to trick it into letting go. Having to knock on my parents’ door to inform them of the supposed accident. Mom setting up the sleeping bag for me on the floor. Chester meowed loudly at me again and then resumed his scratching at the door. It was only slightly better than having to listen to chalk on a blackboard. I scrambled out of the sleeping bag. Better to let him out quickly than have Grace, or worse, Jackson, open the door for me and discover that all my bedding was missing. I’d have a hard time coming up with a good explanation for that, along with why I had ended up on the floor in a sleeping bag. I cracked the door open just enough for Chester to squeeze through into the hallway and then closed it right away. I stretched my hands in the air. I always felt so stiff after sleeping on the floor. How long had I slept in, anyway? I grabbed my phone off of where I had left it on the floor next to the sleeping bag. I tapped the screen. Already 10 a.m. I had really slept in. But that made sense with how late I had stayed up. I scrolled through my notifications. There were a half-dozen messages from Angie and Emma, ribbing me for how late I had slept in. Both of my friends had been up earlier, discussing what our plans would be for the day. They had come to the decision that they wanted to go to the mall. I agreed that it sounded like a bunch of fun, but aside from needing a ride, none of our parents were going to let their middle schoolers stay at the mall unchaperoned. I highly doubted that any of our parents wanted to spend time at the mall this weekend. And there weren’t any other good options at the moment. Emma’s older sister would sometimes be willing to go along with us, but she wasn’t getting back home from college for a few weeks. Angie didn’t have any siblings at all, so that wasn’t of any help. And Grace, well, she worked very hard to avoid spending any more time around my friends than was absolutely necessary. I wasn’t even going to bother asking her. In most other things, Grace and I were on good terms as far as sisters with a five-year age gap between them could be. We both had inherited our parents’ red hair, and I was practically a younger mini-me of my sister, everything else diverged from there. I was the athlete of our family, taking more after my dad in that regard. I mostly stuck to playing soccer, at least competitively, but I was always the first girl picked for any of the activities during gym class. If only I had managed to get Dad’s brains as well. I wouldn’t have any trouble doing math at all. Grace was much more artistically inclined. She planned to major in graphic design at college. I did like to doodle myself, but only as a distraction during boring school lectures; nothing that ended up in my notebook could exactly qualify as art. I grabbed a change of clothes so I could get dressed in the bathroom after the shower. Jean shorts and a tie-die shirt were the plan for today. Even though I had showered in the middle of the night, I still needed to shower again this morning, as I had only gotten under the water to briefly clean off the urine that had gotten all over me from intentionally wetting the bed. I texted my friends that I would check with my mom about the possibility of going to the mall but told them to not get their hopes up. I suggested going over to Angie’s place, which was closest to the neighborhood park, to kick around a soccer ball for a bit if the mall plan didn’t work out. With my clothes in hand, I hesitated in front of the bedroom door. Now was yet another moment of truth. I would have to walk out into the house with the full knowledge that Mom knew that I had wet the bed last night. There wasn’t any reason to think that Dad didn’t know either. If he somehow hadn’t managed to get a glimpse of my wet pajamas last night, Mom would have certainly filled him in on all the details of what had happened. I’d vastly underestimated how uncomfortable that would make me feel. But I could at least take solace in the fact that Mom hadn’t seemed upset at me in any way, and she had handled that late-night bedwetting episode with the expertise of someone who wasn’t out of place in that situation. I stepped out into the hallway. No one was in sight. I speed-walked toward the bathroom. <><><> There was a lingering smell of scrambled eggs when I walked into the kitchen, but any hopes for a late breakfast were dashed by the empty pan on the stove. “Good morning,” Mom said. She was sitting at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee and a now empty plate of scrambled eggs set to the side of the book that was propped open in front of her. “Morning,” I replied. “I had meant to save you some,” Mom said. “But I think your father ate them. He thought you were going to sleep in all the way till lunch at this point.” “That’s fine,” I said, even though my stomach was telling me that it would have liked some scrambled eggs. There was nothing out of the ordinary about that brief exchange, but something still felt off between us as I left the kitchen and walked over to the family room. Mom knew. She didn’t know the real secret. But she knew a secret. It felt as though that one act of pretending to wet the bed had irrevocably altered things between us, a situation that made me feel more uncomfortable because it couldn’t be acknowledged at the moment. “About time you’re up,” Grace said as I walked into the family room. My older sister turned to look at Dad. “You always give me such a hard time about sleeping in. And I’m always up in time to at least eat breakfast.” Dad opened his mouth slightly and then bit his lip. Yeah, he definitely knew as well. I had already come that close to having my secret come out. “Good morning to you, too,” I muttered to my sister as I sat down on the couch and slid my phone out of my pocket. I sent a few more texts to my friends while trying my best to ignore the show that Jackson was watching on the TV. Mom joined us a few minutes later. She gave my sister a look, and Grace went off to the kitchen. Dishes were her chore, after all. Mom glanced to make sure that Grace was out of earshot before turning back to talk to me. “There’s some laundry for you to grab from the basement.” “OK.” I figured that’s where my bedding would still be, as Mom had taken in downstairs to get washed last night. I went back to looking at my phone. “Maddy,” my dad said. “Yes?” “Your mom asked you to do something.” No, she didn’t. She just said my bedding was in the basement. Oh. It hadn’t dawned on me immediately that she had said that to let me know she expected me to go and deal with it right away. Why couldn’t she just tell me what she wanted directly? “Oh, yeah. I’m on it.” I stood up from the couch. Then, I remembered there was something I had told my friends I was going to ask Mom. May as well get it over with. “Hey, Mom, can I ask you a question?” “Sure.” “We were wanting to go to the mall after lunch.” Mom didn’t need an explanation of who I was going to be going with. That could only mean Angie and Emma. “You think you could take us?” “Sorry,” Mom said. “But I’m taking your brother to a birthday party for one of his friends from school. Maybe another time.” I looked over at Dad. “It is a nice day out.” I just stared at him. That wasn’t an answer. Dad finally elaborated on his response. “That means I’m sure there are better things to do than stay inside all day.” “Fine,” I said in defeat. I trudged off toward the laundry room. “Oh, and Maddy, don’t forget to clean the cat litter while you’re down there,” Mom called out after me. <><><> I decided that I was glad we only had one cat as I finished scooping out the litter box. I wrinkled my nose as I tied up the bag and tossed it into a garbage bin. Still, it certainly beat having a dog. No way was I going to go around picking up poop off the ground every day. With that chore done, I turned to the more embarrassing task. My bedding was still in the dryer. It must not have finished long ago, because the sheets were slightly warm as I scooped them up into my arms. Grace was still washing dishes when I came up from the basement. Thankfully, she was too focused on her task to turn and look at what I was doing. I knew that part of the family room was also visible from the top of the basement stairs, but I intentionally didn’t look in that direction. I couldn’t bring myself to make eye contact with my parents, not as they knew exactly why all the bedding had needed to be washed this morning. Jackson was too busy watching Saturday morning cartoons to pay any attention to me, and he was too young to draw any inferences from seeing me carry my bedding back to my bedroom so soon after having gotten out of bed. I walked as quickly and as quietly as I could to the staircase that led to the second floor. I shut my bedroom door behind me and dropped all of my bedding in a heap on the floor. I breathed a sigh of relief. How many more times would I need to go through this charade? Were my acting skills up to the task? I think I had Mom and Dad fooled so far. I’d gone off script last night with my inability to tell my parents that I had wet the bed, but that only added to the obvious shame that I had to have been showing. They had to have believed it was a real bedwetting accident. But how many nights and days were going to have to pass before this could settle into what would be a much simpler routine? Faking bedwetting while wearing a pull-up was going to be a lot easier. These late nights and sneaking around to bring my laundry back to my bedroom weren’t going to be sustainable. I needed pull-ups. And I needed them now. A thought did cross my mind. Maybe after one or two more nights of bedwetting, if my parents hadn’t purchased pull-ups for me by then, I could go ahead and ask them to get some for me. But that wasn’t going to happen. If I wasn’t even capable of verbally admitting that I had wet the bed, there was absolutely no way that I could somehow manage to ask them to purchase pull-ups for me. Besides, I had already ruled out that course of action. I couldn’t give them any hints that I somehow wanted to wear pull-ups. But there wasn’t any other option of getting pull-ups other than the path I had already set myself on last night. Plus, the worst of it was already over. I wasn’t going to have to do anything tonight that I hadn’t already proven that I was capable of doing. I knew I could make myself pee in bed. I knew I could endure the humiliation of walking over to my parents’ bedroom to inform them of the accident. I knew I could get past the embarrassment of having to help my mom strip off the bedding and hand her my wet clothes to bring down to the wash. I could deal with needing to bring my bedding back to my room while trying to avoid catching my sister’s attention. All I had to do was keep my eye on the prize. I crawled onto the uncovered mattress and leaned over to where I had peed on the bed last night. There didn’t appear to be any obvious stains. I leaned in and took a sniff. Didn’t smell bad, either. Whatever cleaning stuff Mom had used obviously worked well. What was it that she had said last night? Oh yes, that it hadn’t been the first time when she had needed to get up in the middle of the night to deal with a wet bed. I suspected some of the cleaning solutions might be leftovers from when Grace had been a bedwetter herself. I had just finished making the bed when there was a knock at the door. I knew it was my sister. Jackson would just burst in right after knocking, and my parents would announce that it was them. “Come in.” “I can take you to the mall,” Grace said as she peered her head in through the open door. That got my attention. But that raised a whole host of questions. Chiefly, why in the world would my older sister volunteer for a task that she disliked so much? Grace stepped into the bedroom and shut the door behind her. “So,” my older sister said, lowering her voice to just barely above a whisper. “About that favor I wanted from you yesterday.” --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com

Chapter 26: Gumdrop Little in Love 2 – LittleFallenPrincess As I listened to people talking in the hallway, at the front door, I sat in my playpen in the living room, happily playing with my toys. They were talking a lot out there, which was weird if they were here to see me, as I’m in here! But then Mummy said it was probably all our new fun stuff that is arriving, as well as my playdate! So why isn’t she just letting them in? I squirmed about on the floor, my padded butt squishing as it moved back and forth. I couldn’t remember going, but I was definitely wet now, as it felt soooo good. Which made it hard to focus on the adults talking out there. I think I heard Mummy say ‘She’s at work’, or somefing. Then a bit of arguing back and forth. I don’t like arguments. People shouting makes me upset, and the more they argued, the more I wanted to cry. This continued for a while, before it all became a bit too much for me and I burst out in tears, wailing loudly. “LIV?” I heard a very loud voice ring out, followed by a lot of banging and heavy footsteps. It sounded like… fighting? I couldn’t tell as I was still entirely focused on my crying right now, I was too overloaded and everything was wrong and I just wanted my Mummy! “LIV! Thank god…” A darker skinned man walked in, followed by a couple of other grown ups. The man had his hair pinned up like Mummy does to me sometimes, an he looked very strong! The woman next to him had really red hair and she looked like she could have been an actress; she was so beautiful! And then the third one looked older, but she was like one of those mean Doctors who give you the jabs and stuff, though her face looked kind… she was probably one of the good ones who gives a lollipop afterwards. “Olivia?” The Doctor-lady bent down by the side of the playpen and looked directly at me. I nodded at them. “Well she’s more with it than Amber was… is. I think her nanites lessened the effects on her brain.” She said to the other two. “So does that mean her safeword will…?” Said the redhead. “Let’s see, shall we? Olivia? Gumdrop.” “Gumdrops? I wan gumdrops!” I replied, clapping my hands excitedly. I love sweeties! Wait… when did my words make sense? “Shit.” The strong man said. Mummy says that’s a bad word though! “Maybe it takes time?” The beautiful woman suggested. “Maybe. We need to get her to my hospital.” Doctor-lady said. “What about Charlie?” “What I gave her was enough to knock out even Malcolm. She’ll wake up with a headache, but she should be fine.” “No Doc… I mean what should we do with her?” “Oh… bring her with us, obviously. We have some Amazon-sized rooms available. We need to find out what happened to her and see if we can’t fix whatever it is.” “Dibs on Olivia…” The redhead said, laughing at the guy. “No, I’ll take Olivia. You two grab Charlie.” Doctor-Lady replied, standing up and bending over with her hands out. “I… umm… where’s Mummy?” I asked, feeling scared by these strangers intruding into my home, especially without Mummy here. “She’s feeling really sleepy right now, little Princess. She told us to take you to my building.” She replied, picking me up with no effort and holding me close to her just like Mummy does. “What about Mummy? I don’t wanna be away from her…” “She’s coming with us, don’t worry. You can stay with her the whole time!” “I can? Do I still get sweeties?” “You do!” The Doctor-Lady smiled at me as she carried me out of the living room, quickly covering my eyes for some reason as we got close to the front door. “Malcolm is going to get you some whilst I give you a checkup.” “Do I get a lollipop afterwards?” “Someone loves her sweeties, doesn’t she? Okay. You get gumdrops for being a good girl, then a lollipop for the checkup. Deal?” “Deal!” I replied, giggling, as the Doctor-Lady uncovered my eyes to see Mummy sleeping in the big man’s arms. “Mummy sleepy!” “Yes she is. Don’t worry, she’ll be well rested once your checkup is complete.” The man said, smiling at me. Something about his face made me feel like I could trust him, so I let the nice Doctor-lady take me in the car to wherever they were taking us. I just hope they have clean nappies there, as I feel like I may leak soon… “So Charlie is in room 49. Olivia is going to be with her, otherwise she may become agitated and lash out. Can you set up a playpen and a little’s bed while I get in touch with a colleague?” The Doctor-lady said to another Doctor. Though this other Doctor was… a lot smaller. “Can do. I can’t believe I didn’t cotton on to something being up. I tried texting for our missed appointments… even tried calling. But I figured she would be busy with her job…” The small Doctor said. I swear that small Doctor should be in nappies like me, she looks jus like a baby! “Ellie, it’s okay. None of us saw the signs. Something happened to Charlie and she kept us all in the dark about what was going on.” “Think we can fix them both? You said their special nanites aren’t even working as intended.” Ellie asked. “I’m going to get a blood test done on both of them, I also want a full body scan and an MRI.” “I can arrange all that. You said you needed to get in touch with a colleague? Will they be able to help?” “I hope so. It’s just if I can manage to get in touch with them…” A lot of time passed before I saw the Doctor-Lady again. She gave me a quick checkup, then placed me in a playpen in Mummy’s room, the one where she was sleeping at the moment, and after giving me my sweeties and lollipop… She left. Then over the course of the evening, a bunch of people came in to see Mummy and me. The big strong man came in a few times, I think he was outside most of the time watching over us, like a knight protecting the Princess and Queen. The redhead came in a few times, trying to talk to me, insisting that I was some kind of grown up like dem? But most of what she said sounded like nonsense, so I focused mostly on my toys. The baby Doctor, Ellie, came in a couple of times, buh she looked terrified every time she looked at me. I dun think she likes me. A couple of nurses came in at some point too and took Mummy and me to some big machines that we were placed in one at a time. They also took some blood from the two of us, before bringing us back to our room. A couple of other babies dressed like grown ups came in, insisting they were my friends. I’m not one to turn down friends to play with, so I tried my best to encourage them to come play with me… but they didn’t seem like they were in the playful mood. Then as my tummy started rumbling and the cravings for milk started to kick in, the Doctor walked back in, along with the redhead, the strong man and the baby Doctor. “So… good news is that it isn’t a pathogen. There are also no signs of any nanites in either system, outside of their unique ones. There was nothing in their blood work, so Charlie must not have been exposed to anything biological.” “That was even a possibility?” The redhead asked, looking really worried all of a sudden. “I thought that maybe she had been exposed to something that may have sent her maternal cravings off the charts. It’s a theory I’ve been considering, regarding why so many Amazon women are so baby-crazy. I thought that maybe whoever attacked Charlie, must have sent her cravings off the charts somehow.” “So you’re saying this is an attack? Someone did this to her?” “Mummy was… attacked?” I asked from the playpen as they all turned around and realised they hadn’t been as quiet as they had intended to be. “No sweetie… someone mean did something to her but we’re going to fix it.” The Doctor-lady replied, instantly making me feel more at ease. I didn’t want anything bad to happen to Mummy, and now they can fix her… “So what is it that caused this huge personality change?” The Doctor-lady was about to answer, when the door opened. “Hypnosis.” A new voice came from the doorway. Everyone turned to see another baby-sized person in the doorway. Whoever this was, everyone seemed excited to see as they all rushed over, giving them hugs and saying how good it was to see them. I couldn’t see who it was from here, the grown ups were blocking my view, but eventually the baby-sized person walked through the small group and stopped at the edge of the playpen, before looking down at me with disappointment. She… she looked just like me! “Hey sis. Been a little while.” She whispered down to me. “Don’t worry, I’ll get you back.” “How can an Amazon be…?” The man in the background said, before being cut off. “LIBRA.” The redhead answered, as if she had some big revelation. “Oh shit, yeah… they had the tech. That’s how Madison was…” “We must have a mole somewhere. Leaked the design of our device. Then one of Liv’s political rivals must have used it against her.” “Then Charlie used the brute force hypnosis to get past Liv’s nanite protection.” “I did a bit of research into this brute force hypnosis your people created. Nasty piece of work. No wonder my nanites couldn’t fix it straight away.” The little in front of me said. “As for Charlie… I’ll need a bit of time. I have no idea how hypnosis affects an Amazon’s brain.” “So you can fix them both?” The Doctor-lady asked, sounding hopeful. “Regarding Charlie… I’ll try my best. Liv just needs a new patch, thankfully. I assume before you said the safeword, she couldn’t speak?” The little asked, the one who said she was my sister. “I… umm… we didn’t notice. She was speaking to us… oh! But that was after we had used the safeword.” Doctor-lady replied. “Yeah, I checked the logs, they had attempted to repair the damage done, but could only fix so much. It may take a bit of time, a few days at least, but I think I could create a patch for them that will repair all the damage done to her.” “So she’s stuck…?” “As a regressed little for a while? Sadly… yes.” My sister sighed. “Well in the meantime, I’ll try to wean her off milk, as the blood work suggested that Charlie had stopped taking the pills a while ago, and that Liv had traces of the hormone in her system.” “Eve? Do you still have that system set up for me?” The little asked her. “The research one? Yeah. I’ll show you. Malcolm, can you keep an eye out outside, make sure no one else sees her like this? Claire, can you…?” “Already too late about her being recognised. Word is she’s spreading like wildfire on social media. Your girls are trying to do damage control, turning the public’s target on her attacker, whoever that may be.” Claire replied. “What about LIBRA?” Malcolm asked. “They are aware of it, and are trying to do something, but I’ve been here with you lot, so I’ve only had brief updates from them. Either way… I wouldn’t trust them right now, considering we most likely have a mole. So let the girls work on damage control. Malcolm, can you help me take care of Liv? She can be a bit of a handful, if I remember correctly.” “I… sure. Never thought Liv would end up like this again.” “I did. Your world sucks.” My sister replied, rolling her eyes. “‘Kay, everyone has their jobs. I’ll show Faith up to the research room, Malcolm and Claire look after Olivia. Ellie, can you go help my girls with protecting Olivia’s reputation?” Ellie, the baby Doctor, nodded and walked off first, followed by the Doctor Eve and Faith. Malcolm and Claire remained and waited for the door to close, before sighing. ======================================================= See? I'm not that bad! Also yay, Faith! If you haven't seen, I'm now up and running on Subscribestar! (Sorry for the reminder again, trying to get my subscribers back after the Patreon rubbish!) Hoping to start the new SubscribeStar exclusive short stories with a trial run in January! if the first commission goes well, I'll see how many I can handle per month (thinking about 2 per month. These stories won't be posted here at all.) ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my patrons for their support over the past couple of years! Seriously, your support meant the world to me, and I hope to be set up somewhere new soon. New chapters of Little in Love 2 every Wednesday/Sunday! Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post! Thanks!

That hairy leg……can’t help myself. A furry incontinent man is my dream partner!!

It will interesting to hear how your first day back at work went. You’ve jumped into the deep end of the incontinence pool and will have to learn how to swim in a hurry. It took me years to learn all the nuances of managing incontinence.

Hey everyone! Really sorry about the lateness of this post. Yesterday was at least fine, but I might have pushed a smidge too hard and just didn’t have the mental power at the end of it all to do much with this story. That being said, this is now definitely the second to last chapter of this story. So, barring any unknown complications, the final chapter will be up tomorrow. You’re all basically spot on with the academy’s position in the government. You’ll see it more in the Height War and Halloween stories at the very least I write eventually, but most Bigs in my canon get very desperate to have Littles. There’s even a possible disease I have in the works that is basically the opposite of maturosis. As such, the government pretty much gives the academy cart blanche with some of these things. Also, I’m just going to say right now that there is not a satisfactory ending to Georgette’s arc in this chapter. There’s some resolution, but there’s honestly just more cliffhangers for now. It’s a spoiler, but I just wanted to be upfront about it and note that her story arc continues in the final chapter, the next story in this trilogy, and even the Opening (yes, if you can recall, she is the CEO of future Diamond Technologies that was featured there and the mother of a future board member in Project Nurture). Next, I’m still contemplating what my next story will be. A few of you have commented, but as a reminder, this is the final time you can make your suggestion to me if you haven’t done so already. I will also announce my next story when I post the final chapter, which again, will be sometime tomorrow. Anyways, I hope everyone enjoys this next and penultimate chapter of this story! Chapter 18: The Tasks of Aftermaths I was a broken teacup. I felt I had been picked up as shiny and delicate perhaps, maybe even chipped before from just some time under a bit of stress, but now… I felt someone had dropped me completely and broken every fiber of what I was. I was still me of course, but after three weeks of enduring the treatments that Georgie heaped and tested upon me, I felt that I was no longer the same Little. Georgie had explained to everyone about my T5 retrovirus as her cover story for why I had changed so much so quickly. It was a legitimate virus, but after only twenty minutes of Samantha taking me back under her care when she had gotten back, she knew it was a lie. Under an hour later, the whole family knew as well. I suppose things like that start to become obvious when you come back, and your Little messes themselves helplessly in your lap during a good long cuddle. To say she and everyone else were furious afterwards though was an understatement. “I just can’t believe this is happening,” Harriet huffed as we all waited outside for the judge’s deliberation. Oppy sighed. “It’s a lot, but I think things might soon be turning around. There is something funny about all this…” She then suddenly trailed off, and I quickly noticed that Samantha was glaring back at her. Once again, I felt like they were in cahoots with each other. Harriet and the rest of the family likely saw as well, but just left it alone. Whenever those two schemed, you either knew and helped them, or didn’t for a good reason and stayed out of their way. For my part, I just humbly sat next to Samantha as she continued to stroke my back. I was disheartened to hear that despite her literally telling me that the academy was involved, Georgie would be tried in the normal governmental law system of Libertalia. Despite Grossman and Franklin, the academy did tend to rule more in favor of Littles. I was feeling helpless enough as it was, but all this certainly wasn’t helping… nor did it with my anxiety. Since the interview 43C period, I had started to become very uneasy in my own life. Nurple, Stripe, and the family, particularly Samantha, had enormously helped me cope whenever I had an issue. Most of their methods only seemed to further plunge me into the more extreme aspects of Littlehood, but I just wanted relief, so I would take anything they threw at me. Now, though, due to the substance on the ‘thumb suck balloon,’ I was doing just that to do a little of my own coping with my anxiety. The action just started off as something my mind would mindlessly do at first. I kept waking up after any nap, exhaustive episode after another round of testing, or even from my sleep, but then it progressed to my unconscious mind during the day as well. When Georgie first caught me doing it, she was elated, and I blushed about ten shades of red. When Samantha had caught me last week, I was mortified, but strangely enough, after taking my thumb out in shock, by then, I desperately wanted to put it back in. Since then, the urge had only gotten worse. To my relief though, the inner chambers of the judge that was hearing if this mess was even a case, then opened. Several members filed out, but finally, one stopped in front of us. Her pressed pantsuit and detailed but subtle makeup told me that she was our advocate during the hearing. “Norris family I presume?” “That’s us,” Oppy confirmed grimly. The woman sighed and I could feel the air go out of the room. “I’m afraid the judge won’t see the case. He’s very firm on this, but I’m afraid there are factors beyond our control at play here.” It was not the news we wanted to hear. “How can that be?” Harriet burst out. “I mean… look at him. Percy is a Little!” The advocate quickly looked at me and then seemed to become very uncomfortable. I of course knew what Harriet was trying to say, but the advocate barely knew me. She was court-appointed, and to point out that I was a Little around here was like saying the sky was blue. In this society, and even my own definition for a while now, I was a Little. What Harriet meant to say was that I was now more of a regressed Little instead of how I used to be. Still, the advocate nodded sadly after probably figuring out what Harriet had actually meant. “Yes, and I’m very sorry about that. I’m very pro-Little myself, but the law is the law. Percy here is a Little and by such definitions, Georgette took care of him in Miss Norris’ absence as best as she saw fit. As of today, there are still no firm rights for Littles unless it comes to bodily harm or kidnapping. Neither of those occurred, but also, due to previous rulings after the Height Warm, right or wrong, a Little’s mental fortitude is weaker than a Bigs and therefore is easier to break. As such, Georgette cannot be prosecuted.” “Then we will appeal that decision,” Oppy said defiantly. Samantha only gripped my hand tighter. She had taken it after the initial ruling was said out loud. It was a little too tight for me, but I didn’t complain. She probably took it for my comfort, but at this point, I felt it was more for her own. “That’s well within your purview ma’am,” the advocate noted. “Knowing your reputation, I wouldn’t doubt it, but at this juncture, I can only wish you the best of luck. Maybe something will change in the courts, but for now, this is the ruling.” After that, the advocate and Oppy talked a little and the rest of us mulled about the ruling and I got several more apologies from the family. Each had expressed their guilt to me since the revelation of what happened occurred with Georgie, but today, they seemed more resigned than as defiant as before. “I’m sure we’ll get her next time,” Luna offered, but I could see that their tail and ears were slumped downward in sadness, and in all likelihood, doubt over their own words. While Harriet and Luna were talking to me, another crowd shuffled by, and one even hit a returning Samantha from the restroom. She had checked my diaper beforehand and noted that it likely could hold up until we got home. They had been upgraded again to be slightly thicker and definitely more absorbent. Due to their new Little classification, this now meant they were decorated with cartoon characters from one of the shows that I now actually enjoyed instead of the previous geometric shapes, but I just took it in stride. If nothing else, I was just glad that further embarrassing leaks were less likely… To me, it was now one less thing to worry about. Regardless, the hit by that particular person in the crowd spun Samantha a bit. I could tell she was a bit dazed and saddened by the ruling as well, but she immediately seemed to perk up. She almost called out to the individual that had hit her, but they had seemingly dissipated back into the crowd. Oddly, she then rushed over to us and motioned us to leave quickly. I just went along with everything and made sure to hold her hand as we navigated through the crowds. Once outside and to our cars through, Samantha stopped everyone and pulled her other hand out of her pocket. Inside it was a crumbled-up note. “What is that?” Harriet asked, looking down at the paper Samantha had just revealed to us. “The person that bumped me… it was a handoff…” Samantha said quietly. She then handed it to the group. It missed me, but Samantha quickly noticed and kept her voice quiet. “It’s about the hearing… it says we can prosecute Georgette further, but she’s being protected…” “What?” Oppy asked in disbelief. “What does that even mean? You think she’s an informant?” My mind quickly reeled and thought back to what she had informed me the last night. I had told everyone even, and while it seemed to cool tempers and ensure no physical harm would come to Georgette, they were still mad that she would agree to the deal from Franklin in the first place, hence why we were at court today. Still, her deal and her regret over her role with my further regression, at least to me, made the idea of her role as an informant seem less crazy. From what I could tell though, I seemed to be in the minority. “I don’t believe it,” Luna said adamantly, “and I don’t care. She tried to hurt Percy. There’s nothing more to it…” “Agreed…” Harriet said, her fists practically white knuckling from the rage I could tell she was holding back. She would have been a great hunter, but according to Samantha, she was already likely going to be one of the top new recruiters graduating this year. “I don’t think I would care even if she was helping the president.” “As much as I want to be non-violent…” Samantha continued, her rage just as visible, “I agree. She hurt a member of this family… she hurt Percy…” Oppy sighed heavily. “Maybe, but still, honey…” Oppy began, her wizened words punctuating through all the anger of the family right then. “I think it would be best to keep the note in mind. We might have some options open to us now, and you just never know when they could come in handy.” After that, tempers seemed to die down and it was agreed by all that we should all resign back to Oppy’s house as usual. There, everyone had either planned a small celebration, or a consolation get-together for me if the hearing didn’t go well. As Samantha buckled me into my car seat, I could definitely see that it was going to be a consolation party for everyone else as well. Arriving at the house, Samantha first went to change my diaper back in Chelsea’s still-present nursery. I guess I had been dribbling a bit for a while now as I was quickly declared as ‘soaked’ even through my new diapers. It was a bit embarrassing, but like other things, I was just grateful I wasn’t messy… yet. The consolation party then proceeded and there was just more discussion about everything that had happened in general. I heard conspiracy theories and rumors regarding just about everything, but I had just resigned myself to sitting on the playmat on the floor with both Chelsea and Ditzy and tuned them out. It was just easier that way sometimes. While we were at court, a neighbor that Oppy had known for years had been watching over the two. After Georgette, she was immediately let go as Oppy’s babysitter and she no longer even trusted the service she worked for. I could see the pain in Georgie’s eyes of her betrayal a few days later but considering that I only wanted to suck my thumb right then, I still couldn’t feel too bad for her. On a brighter note, while Ditzy was still drooling all over herself, Cheslea had been approved to once again grow up. The process was apparently grueling and even agonizing to a degree though. At one point, Oppy informed us that Cheslea was basically feeling that prickingly pins and needles sensation one gets after a body part of theirs had fallen asleep… except that it was happening in her brain. After looking it up one day when I just couldn’t find it in myself to watch another cartoon about a dancing bear, I found out that after even a single treatment, some had the mental capacity to then opt out of further treatments. It meant they would be in a state of regression in some ways for the rest of their lives, so Chelsea had been continually checked with to ensure she was still okay proceeding or if she wanted to stop. She never did, and if I had to take a guess, it was likely because with each treatment and awakening, a little part of her would come back if it could. “P… Per… Per-cee…” Chelsea said with difficulty. I stopped parading Nurple around for a moment and looked over to the former mighty Big. “I… I sowwy…” Her words hung in the air with a heaviness I still didn’t expect from the woman before me. For almost as long as I had been here, she was basically an infant in all manners of that word except for in her size. I had seen her run around and not wanting to get dressed, I had seen her coated in carrot puree, and I had even grown almost used to the idea of her just squatting and going whenever she had to. She still did that… well, because apparently, those muscles atrophied a bit much, but still, I was finding it hard to say anything back to her. “I… sowwy, Per-cee… I wassa bad Big to you…” she confessed. Again, I struggled with my words, but I managed to finally find a few. “It’s okay, Chelsea. I’m not mad at you… not anymore really.” Chelsea then oddly looked ashamed. I thought maybe she could use a diaper change, but she just looked back up at me and sighed. “Sammy nevuh told you… did she?” I wasn’t sure what she was referring to, so I shook my head. “She’s a good sistah…” She seemed to be heavily contemplating something, but like my Nurple, she pulled in her doll closer to her body. I guess after so many months of having it as an outlet of safety, happiness, and security, she still naturally gravitated to it more. “Back at da con… Sammy didn’t wan’ to take you at first…” Cheslea explained. “I changed her mind…” “Oh…” I wasn’t really sure how to act with this new information. Maybe I would have been upset six months ago, but now… Samantha had been one of my biggest allies and advocates here. Maybe if Judge Grossman had taken me instead, I would have felt differently, but I couldn’t really say I hated where I ended up… despite some of my more recent issues. “You did what most do around here,” I tried to explain to the struggling and still heavily mentally regressed Big before me. “You may have been an influence on her, but she still went along with it. I would be madder at her, but I forgave her a long time ago. I’m not sure if you saw all that though. It was when…” “I saw evwy…” she groaned and massage her mouth for a minute. “Sowwy… hard ta form words… I saw it all…” “Oh…” Chelsea didn’t say she had processed it all, but clearly, she could remember everything from it. I wonder if she felt shame for anything or if she had passed it off as a medical thing beyond her control and nothing else. The Chelsea I had first met of manicures, midriffs, and mimosas would have likely rather died than continue after all that if she remembered it. The Chelsea before me though, the one with diapers, a pink dress, and her hair now done in a ponytail and bow rather than pigtails… I wasn’t so sure about. I had been so focused on Chelsea that I hadn’t even noticed the family above us had stopped talking and was now looking and listening to us. “I didn’t know that, Chelse…” Samantha said glumly, shocking me a bit from her sudden statement. “Why didn’t you say anything to us before now… or even to Percy just today?” Chelsea looked down and seemed very ashamed. “I didn’t wan’ you all ta know… I was em… emba… embar…” “Embarrassed?” Oppy finally added to help her daughter out. Chelsea nodded quickly. “Yeah… you try rememberin’ all dat… I don’t think I’ll ever see a pool da same way again…” Oppy blushed and seemed filled with regret. “Sorry about that… I had instructions from the academy, Chelse… I would have taken you to Nana’s old cabin on the lake up north if I could… but it was part of your specialized protocol two…” Chelsea scooted over, a distinct crinkling echoing throughout the room and then nuzzled against her mom’s leg. It seemed pretty childish, but many online had noted that those recovering from protocol two, even if they opted for all the painful treatments, could still have lingering effects… years after or even permanently. “Iss okay, mommy… mom…” Chelsea quickly blushed, but Oppy only brushed her daughter’s hair gently and looked back at her with an expression I could only identify as care and love. “Thank you, honey. It means a lot to me for you to tell me that.” Their little moment lasted a little bit, but Chelsea then turned back to the rest of us who were just enjoying the tenderness of it all. “I wanna say sowwy to all you as well…” Everyone immediately tried to stop her, but she just held up her hand calmly. “Pwease… I wassa bwat…” She continued to blush at her mispronunciation. I couldn’t blame her, but I also remembered that only a little over a month ago, we were praising her for saying even single syllables to identify us by. “I took you all fo’ gwanted an’ dwagged you thwu so much… I… I’m sowwy…” She drooped her head in shame, but Harriet quickly spoke up. “It’s okay, Chelsea. You might have been all that back then and more even, but none of us are perfect.” She then paused and looked a bit saddened herself. “Especially me…” “You da bess!” Chelsea said in a clear effort to cheer her old friend up. They were closer in age, and I had found out that they were really only a few years apart at the academy. In fact, Chelsea might have even been punished more if she hadn’t been so fresh in the field. “I couldn’t say it befo’, but congwats on bein’ a recwuitah… Buh pwomise to juss be bettah dan me… or dis be you.” She then flipped up her dress and showed off her diaper underneath. We all laughed at that, but I could also tell that she was definitely still recovering. I knew Oppy would help her out like she did with everyone else. At the end of it all, I was still a little upset with her previous actions, but each day since the consolation party, I had felt that feeling recede even more. She was family and said sorry to me after all… that had to count for something. In the weeks that followed, February approached and then flew by faster than I ever could have thought possible. Samantha seemed determined to be packing for something and I feared another trip. Not that I would have to spend another session with Georgie, as Oppy wouldn’t take no for an answer when Samantha had tried to think of other options, but I knew I would have been genuinely lost without her by my side. The blanket she had given me was amazing and I felt it was one of the few reasons I didn’t crack by the end of my time with Georgie, but it was no substitute for the real deal. Still, my nerves played havoc, even as Samantha noted that she was only ‘being prepared.’ Two weeks into the month though, I was lying on the floor in Samantha’s office back at the academy. I was guest lecturing today, one of my final times actually, but I was still mournful over my new bracelet. Despite lecturing, being a Little here, I still required a wristband to be on academy grounds when not in daycare like the others. With a recent surge in Little desire, it became even more pressing now for my own safety. Still, the wristband was a reminder of two things. The first was that I was now rounding almost a full year since I had last seen Earth and come to this dimension where I received my first on my second day here. The con where all this had started felt so long ago now, particularly as I was now coloring on the floor in my caregiver’s office when a year ago, I was in an office of my own. Secondly though, was that after returning after my time with Georgie, my wristband now sported a single green stripe. It wasn’t the two that Ditzy had been given, but mine now matched Derek’s. I could still comfort myself in the fact that I didn’t have two, but it wasn’t much. Of course, Derek would now be classified with two stripes himself after his abuse of the Tabers milk. I truly wondered if I could even call him my friend now with his level of regression unfortunately, but again, I had one consolation with my friends; DB’s and Melley’s caregiver had finally and fully stopped with their dosages of the Tabers milk the other day unexpectedly. I soon found out why. Samantha had stepped out of the room briefly later that afternoon in between classes and I was back on the floor. The Bigs in class had asked some brutal questions, and I weathered them brilliantly in my own opinion, but now was my time to relax. I was even getting a little sleepy, but Samantha’s borrowed tablet helped stave off my exhaustion… for now. I was watching a Littles program dedicated to the animals of other countries when an ad soon came on. ‘Stupid ads even in this dimension…’ I tried to click away, but then quickly realized that it wasn’t an ad for any type of new soap or car. It was actually a news story being circulated around instead. “Breaking news…” the perky redheaded Big woman began to announce. “Tabers milk has been recalled completely from all markets after several incidents with Littles occurred last Tuesday.” My heart leapt for joy. I wasn’t sure if others would recover, but at least they wouldn’t be getting any worse. I wondered how Georgie and her father were doing and if I even had something to do with the recall. I listened intently to hear more. “According to insider sources and eye-witness testimony, the ingredients can be a substitute for a fast-acting regression serum. While many hailed this as a miracle, three Littles were critically injured when they wandered off from their caregivers after being unexpectedly and quickly regressed. All three are okay but authorities may seek…” “I don’t care, Tom! You can’t do this!” I heard Samantha shout from outside. I immediately dropped the tablet and rushed over to the door. Samantha sounded agitated but also a little frightened even. She was my caregiver, but I needed to protect her. As I neared the cracked open door though, I stopped briefly and began to debate with myself. ‘Samantha said to stay put… she said there are dangerous people out there and that I’m safer in here. This also seems personal maybe…ugh! What do I do?” My head flipped back and forth at least six times, enough for me to not hear the conversation outside, but I eventually decided to only listen in and maybe just take a peak or two. “… you have no choice, Sam,” Judge Grossman pointed out. “Well, she does,” Reddington noted, a sinister laugh at the back of his throat coming though. “She doesn’t have to like that outcome and some things will get broken, but she has a right to exercise that option.” “Sure, Red,” Samantha scoffed. “Lose any more of your precious hunters lately?” I heard him grumbling but his relative silence other than that was very telling. “That’s what I thought. Now, I did my part last month. I agreed to it. I did it. It was dirty and low, but we had a deal. One last job for you all and that was it.” “Well, we’re altering that deal, Sam,” Judge Frankling sneered back at her. “Or would you prefer that your activities in Europa get a little more light shined down on them? What would dear old Oppy say of what her daughter did?” he asked mockingly. “You leave her out of this!” I could hear the fear and anger start to build up in her tone. I grabbed Nurple from the floor and held him close. My thumb nearly itched I wanted to suck it so bad right now, but I frustratingly always seemed to sort of space out if I did though. All this was clearly too critical of information to submit to my stupid new urge, so I resisted and continued to listen in. “Then help us out,” Judge Grossman then offered, clearly the more level-headed of the group. “You do this for us… and we hold our end of the deal up. It’s very simple and even just a repeat of last year.” “But he’s different. I’m different…” Samantha paused for a moment. “Heck, you all even made sure my sister is different now. I don’t even have a partner anymore to go with me. How can I possibly pull off what you’re asking? Last time was a single Little each. Now you want four per recruiter?” “Exactly, Sam!” Reddington thundered. “I knew you could count. Wasn’t sure if your sister had rubbed a little off on you. She can count past four now, right?” “Quiet, Red!” Judge Franklin surprisingly fired back. I bolted to the crack in the door and looked out at the posse surrounding Samantha. I was half-expecting to see Reddington suddenly wallop the judge beside him, but instead, he just took a step back. “Good… now,” he turned back to Samantha, “this is why we want him to go along as well back to Earth.” ‘Oh no…’ “But he got hit by that tramp, Georgette…” Samantha tried to defend. “He’s not the same as a year ago. He might not make it back.” “Such a shame,” Judge Grossman said, actually sounding a little saddened over the news. “He’s stronger than you think though, Sam. Give him a chance, and besides, we only want him to advise you.” “But that’s betraying Earth!” Samantha shouted back. I even took a little step back from her displayed fury, but I managed to re-step back into place. “He knows now! I told you all that months ago and you didn’t care then, but now you should.” “And why should we care?” Franklin unapologetically asked. “He’s your problem over there. Keep him in line and then bring him back safe. What harm could Earth possibly do to him more than what’s already happened over here?” Samantha sighed. “If you weren’t such a high-born little priss, it would be a wonder you ever made judge…” Franklin seemed so stunned right then, that Samantha had just enough time to continue. “You idiots. This is Earth and now you want Percy to advise me on potential targets to take back here!” ‘I knew it!’ I didn’t want to have been right on my guess that they were talking about me, but there it was. ‘Earth… one year since…’ It was my home, and I was human, but I felt so conflicted. Having practically no family back there anymore, my connections were dwindling each day, or at least in comparison to the massive growth I was experiencing on this planet and dimension. At the same time though, I would always be from Earth. I would always be reminded of it even, so all this just felt like a massive burden. Samantha was clearly on my side, but it was hard not to feel that sometimes she was the only faculty member who actually was. In my moment of apprehension and conflict though at that door, suddenly, a moment of clarity washed over me. Perhaps it was a surge of emotions to defend the woman who was risking so much for me to remain free and out of the true reach of the academy, but maybe it was something more… primal… loving even. Whatever it was though, for Samantha’s sake, I knew I had to swallow my own fears or doubts right then, and listen back in. “There’s no gray area here,” she continued gallantly in my defense. It was hard not to care for her even more right then. “If he did this, he literally would be betraying his own kind. I mean, I know how I would feel about that, but how would you all feel?” The three looked at each other, but Reddington and Franklin just shrugged. “Your problem… not ours…” Judge Grossman acted differently though. “Pay no attention to them, Sam.” She scoffed. “You are right… they can be idiots sometimes.” I could see that Samantha was just as shocked as I was, but Grossman just continued. “Get him to see reason here. I mean, Georgette might have whacked him, but he’s still mentally there when it comes to these things. His lecture today showed me that if I didn’t know it already…” “You saw?” Samantha asked warily. Judge Grossman nodded her head. “I see most of them online via the web camera you have there for remote or sick students to view later. If this academy wants to interact with Earth more and even advise the government on the Little situation in the coming years, we need to know humans and those lectures are just perfect for that…” It was now Franklin’s and Reddington’s turns to seem shocked. “Still,” she continued, “I know it will be hard, but I’ve seen the burden he carries about knowing about protocol one. Tell him… hmmm…” she seemed to be thinking on the spot, but finally, I saw the light of an idea behind her eyes. “Tell him that he does this… you are both free… not even protocol one anymore. Forever…” Judge Franklin immediately seemed to try to protest her deal, but Grossman just held her hand up in defiance. It was so sudden that I thought she was about to slap him, but regardless, her quick gesture stopped him cold. “So, Sam, do we have a deal?” Samantha seemed hesitant once more, but ultimately nodded. “I’ll tell him that. It will help, but I can’t guarantee anything.” Franklin then seemed to get his nerve back. “Think of something, Sam. I don’t like this new deal, but you’re smart enough to convince Percy of anything and we need this surge of Littles from Earth. You can do this.” He then scoffed. “You know, it’s even one of the reasons we didn’t deny your sister’s regrow application or didn’t regress you on the spot originally.” Samantha seemed to a second to process it all, but just nodded and backed closer to the door. Fearing the conversation would end soon, I shuffled as quietly as I could back over to my tablet and brought up a game of popping balloons. It was honestly fun, but it was just loud enough to ensure that I couldn’t have heard of anything if someone else looked in, but also quiet enough that no one would be suspicious of the game just suddenly turning on. Soon, fortunately only Samantha wearily re-entered the room and looked over at me. For my part, I knew the burden she must be carrying then, so I just did my best to smile at her. She smiled back and eased down to the floor with me. She exhaled loudly. “Percy… you’ve been asking if I was leaving for another mission. I wasn’t sure I was, but I had my suspicions.” She sighed. “Well, now I know I’m going, but this time… there’s something different. This time…” “I’m coming along with you,” I interrupted. The shock on her face was priceless and worth my interruption alone, but I had my reasons for springing it on her. She was burdened enough, and I want to take the load off where I could. “I listened in… at the door… just a little…” “Oh?” Samantha questioned, almost as if she was finding out that I was confessing to eating a cookie from the jar in the kitchen I wasn’t supposed to. “I heard yelling… I wanted to help… I know I’m not supposed to leave the floor, but I heard the deal… so, I’ll go…” Samantha smiled but then seemed pained for a moment. “But Percy… it’s back to the con… the one where we met an all… so, are you sure? I can find a way around this.” She then began to panic and sputter out a whole bug-out idea. Apparently, she had been thinking about all this for a while. “We’ll get Oppy and everyone else. I heard Gaule is very liberal. We can go there. It’s beautiful and I even know a place where we can stay. Water, gardens, trees, picket fence… its all so wonderful and great and free. I actually saw it last month when I…” “Woah!” I said, reaching out to her and rubbing her leg to ease her obvious anxiety over this. From everything that had happened in the past year, it was actually quite the reverse of our positions for who was comforting who. “I’ll still go, Samantha. That deal is too promising to not take.” I then stood up defiantly and was about a second away from striking a superhero pose with my hands on my hips. “When do we leave?” Samantha giggled a little at first, but then immediately scooped me up and gave me a long cuddle. After everything that had been going on, I think it was exactly what we both needed right then. “Soon, baby. Soon…” We then stayed like that for a while. I wondered what she was thinking, but my own thoughts were very clear to me. Everything was being set up just how they wanted, and we were going back to where we had first met, and all this mess had started. “From what I knew, I no longer believed in just pure coincidences.” See, after finding out that Reddington had such an issue with our family and was the one to set up the con in the first place, I felt that the whole thing was a set up. Obvious choice to find willing Littles? Yes, but almost too obvious. To me, it felt like leading a bunch of lions to a buffet of zebra meat and then not expecting them to chow down. It was frankly hard for me not to imagine a scenario where any Big wouldn’t be tempted by everyone there rocking their onesies and padded posteriors. So, now going back to where it all began, I felt I could be forgiven for thinking that all this might have been a trap. It puzzled me though and I wondered how it would work this time. ‘Would I be getting a new brother or sister?’ I internally shook the thought out of my head. ‘No, idiot. There’s the whole one Little per Big rule, but then what if not that?’ I tried to think hard on it, but about the only thing I managed to do from all that mental straining was almost fill my diaper up right then and there. That was the last thing I wanted. I wasn’t sure when the next con would be and I wasn’t even sure what was happening, but right then I felt I should only have one goal in mind. Regardless of how I felt about Earth and being from there myself, I knew then I had to help Samantha in any way that I could. I had thought about it for a while now, but I was truly part of the family, and now, people in this academy were threatening it. It wouldn’t stand, so regardless of whether it was a trap or not, I knew I had to go help them with whatever I could. Something had to be done about the academy for sure, but for now, helping my family was my priority. So, with a sigh and a quiet suck of my thumb in resignation over what I had to do, I knew I didn’t know it all, but I at least knew one part of my future for sure now. Next stop; the convention.

Non-contoured diapers are pretty simple as @ValentinesStuff mentioned. You can add extra layers in the middle or not. For basic sewing skills, look for videos on youtube about making baby diapers and scale them up. The plastic pants are a little more tricky and I'd suggest you use one you already have that fits well and take it apart. You can use that as a pattern to make your own. Youtube is your friend for this also. Most of what's available is for PUL fabric, but you can do the same thing with other waterproof type stuff as well. I've converted to cloth for most of the time, but I prefer the contoured diapers. I'm working on a design to make my own and when I have something that works, I'll post a message about the results. Unfortunately, I have several projects in front of this one, so it could be a while before I can spend some time on it. In the meantime, here's some links I've run across in my research for flats and prefold: Babykins has flat prefold diapers AdultClothDiaper.com has a selection of LeakMaster prefold and flat diapers. Angel Fluff has a wide selection of prefold in flannel and gauze as well as birdseye flats

Thanks to @beallucanbfor adding $10.01 to the pot!

24 HOURS FROM TULSA Oh, I was only twenty four hours from Tulsa Ah, only one day away from your arms I hate to do this to you but I love somebody new, what can I do? Gene Pitney (1963), Dusty Springfield (1964) . . . . Ian leaned back, closed his eyes, and allowed his taste buds to take control of his senses. A pastrami sandwich with all the trimmings was a treat at the best of times, but coming on top of a steady diet of breast milk, it was nirvana. “Real food,” he sighed contentedly, “real food!” When he opened his eyes, he saw that Priscilla was staring at him strangely. “What?” “The look on your face. Ian, your resilience ...” Priscilla shook her head, trying to come to terms with it. “A half hour ago, you were in so much pain that I was fighting to hold back the tears, and there were a couple of times when it took everything I had not to throw up in your trash can. And now?” She continued to shake her head. “Now, here we are, eating a late lunch in my favorite deli, acting as if nothing terrible had ever happened to either one of us. I'm sitting here trying to process the strangest day in my whole life, and I'm not having much luck.” After changing Ian's diaper, she had led him out to her cruiser and driven directly to the deli, parking in the slot reserved for her mother at the rear of the building. Sitting at the small table, sandwiches, chips and beverages spread out in front of them, the only thing that seemed out of place was Priscilla's uniform. In every other respect, they appeared to be a young couple who had taken advantage of a late winter afternoon lull to duck in out of the cold and enjoy each other's company. “I'm afraid it's about to get stranger still,” Ian grimaced. He took a sip of his coffee, and was surprised to see that his hand wasn't shaking. “How so?” Priscilla leaned across the table, drawing closer to him. The intimacy of the gesture warmed her. Ian's smile, she now realized, had always been tinged with sorrow, with regret, the sometimes visible face of a broken heart. She longed to take him in her arms, to hold him close, and somehow to make all the pain go away. “I made love to you without thinking about the consequences. And they're real. Seriously, Priscilla, what I laid out for you wasn't theoretical; it's going to happen.” “No regrets, Ian … for either of us. One of the things I'm trying to process is my feelings for you. I'm nor ashamed of them, and I'm not going to apologize-- to Sarah, or anyone else.” “Good, because I don't want you to. And if anyone asks you straight out, just say da.” Priscilla's laugh was heartfelt. “I'm glad you feel that way because I don't think either one of us could deny it with a straight face!” “My thoughts exactly,” Ian grinned. “So, here's what I'm thinking.” He leaned forward, further closing the distance between them. “The security team will be organized into outer and inner perimeters, and when there are women and small children involved, the standard procedure is to have an all-female team on the inside, led by someone local with police experience. I'm pretty sure that Donnie would agree to make you the principal agent, but it would mean living on site … after completing the standard training course at Quantico, with a bit of supplemental training tossed in to fit the specific situation. The basic course is thirty-three days, and the supplemental would probably occur on site. Think you can live without me for a month?” “How on site is on site?” The twinkle in Priscilla's eyes told Ian that she was already sold, if only for the fringe benefits. “In the bedroom next to the target, which initially will be Sarah. By the way, I expect to be comfortably situated in one of the cribs that I occupied in the psych ward. The odds are good that a bedroom will be converted into a nursery, with me the sole occupant. Could get lonely in there.” The twinkle in Ian's eyes told Priscilla that Ian was not about to end their relationship. “And would this nursery of yours have a changing table, where I could look after you properly?” The twinkle in Priscilla's eyes had turned positively devilish. “Count on it … and perhaps one of those miniature refrigerators to house my ba bas.” His cock was straining to get hard inside its diapered prison. “Well, free room and board … and a course at Quantico would look awfully good on my resume ...” “But can I survive without you for a whole month? You've already made it clear that nobody else on the force would be willing to change my shitty diaper.” Ian was rather glad that the deli was all but deserted this late in the afternoon. “Suzie Marshall might be willing ...” “Can't see Sarah giving her the key. Besides, she probably isn't pistol trained. City girls just don't know their guns.” “Well, I could ask Mom; she doesn't have much to do in December, knows a good pistol when she sees one, and has definitely changed the odd diaper.” “Might make your dad jealous ...” Ian snapped his fingers. “How about one of those cute coeds camping out at the office? Maybe for extra credit.” “Hmm … nope … too late in the term. Sorry.” “Know any nannies packing heat?” “Not really … wait … Harriet's a possibility. She definitely wants to get in your pants, and her uncle is a notorious gangster. She may know what to do with a loaded gun.” “In my current state, make it a double action.” “Cocked and loaded, are you? Ready to fire?” “Not sure about the pin … might need some tender, loving care.” Just needs a little oil … a bit of pampering.” “Pampering is always good ...” Priscilla reached out to clasp the back of Ian's neck, and pulled him forward. “Such a baby,” she murmured, as she kissed him full on the lips, holding him tightly in her grasp. “But don't worry. A month at Quantico will go by fast, and then Mommy will always be here to change your shitty diaper. Da?” “Da.” . . . . “One more stop and we can call it a day,” Sarah announced. She turned around in her seat, and double checked to make sure that Vickie's seat belt was properly fastened. “Where to?” Rita was making her way slowly down the aisle. The accident rate in snow bound mall parking lots was staggering. “Mom says that we need to visit a shop in the northern suburbs. They apparently have a nice array of spanking implements that will encourage our babies to be more obedient.” “Works for me,” Rita shrugged as she glanced in the rear view mirror to see how Vickie was reacting. She wasn't particularly surprised to see that their colleague was staring aimlessly out the window, and paying no attention whatsoever to the frank discussion of corporal punishment underway in the front seat. When it came to paddling the rear end, Rita suspected that there was precious little to be left to Vickie's imagination. “Did you think that she was a bit too cruel,” Rita continued. “Who?” Sarah wasn't sure who they were talking about. “The lady running the store. It's one thing to leave that boy in the storeroom in a diaper and baby pants, sucking on a pacifier, while she rang up our purchase. But taking his trousers with her, and calling his mother to come pick him up? I don't know about that.” “Well, if the mother sent him to the store in the first place, obviously there's no harm done. But if he lied about that … if he's acting out some kind of baby fetish behind her back, it's better for her to find out now rather than later. Rita, you of all people know that reality rarely measures up to fantasy, especially adolescent fantasy. If she indulges him … starts sending him to school in diapers and treating him like a baby at home, he might decide that his fantasy isn't all that he thought it would be, and he'll move on. But if this is what he really wants, either she takes her new baby home and helps him come to terms with his infantile desires, or they end up in counseling. Either way, Tommy comes out ahead.” “I suppose so,” Rita reluctantly conceded, “but I hope that his diaper holds up. When his mother walks through the door, that poor kid is going to pee up a storm!” “They'll probably have to pry his pacifier loose with a crowbar,” Sarah laughed. “And I can't wait to slip Ian's pacifier into his mouth when we get home. It will get a real workout when I'm spanking his baby butt! How about you, baby girl?” Sarah twisted around in her seat, and licked her lips as she thought about what she had in store for Vickie. “You're so naughty that I'm not even going to bother spanking you. Nope. I'm going straight to the paddle, or perhaps I'll graduate to the cane that I'm going to buy at our next stop. Mom says that it might be the only thing that will get your attention. We'll see, baby girl; we'll see. But don't worry! You'll have your binkie to calm your tears!” . . . . Priscilla peeked at her watch, then stood up. “Be right back,” she said; “I'm going to call Mom, and see how things are going on her end.” Waving at the guys behind the counter, Priscilla opened a door marked MANAGER, and disappeared inside, leaving Ian to salivate over the next bite of his pastrami sandwich. While he ate, he was also thinking about his next talk with Donnie Freeman. Ian well understood that it was not in the Agency's best interest to find his daughter, for the simple reason that he would cease working for Langley the moment Linh arrived on his doorstep. When he had refused the latest Polish mission, he had in effect cast a formal vote of no confidence in a community that he had distrusted since adolescence. He was pinning his hopes on the Russians, but he wasn't quite ready to write the DC crowd off completely. Rita, Vickie and Sarah gave him three cards to play in this convoluted game, and Priscilla's admission that they were lovers had just added a fourth. As long as the Agency could keep control, Donnie would have been perfectly happy to learn that he was sleeping with every woman who crossed his path. Sex was merely a means, children the end. Ian concluded that pitching Priscilla to the Agency would be like tossing bloody meat into shark infested waters. The outcome was a foregone conclusion. . . . . “Fantasy Island?” Rita did a double take as she pulled into the lot. It was obviously a shop selling “marital aids,” but with a hardware store on one side and an Asian supermarket on the other, it looked distinctly out of place. “Yep. Mom says that this is the place to shop in the Twin Cities when you're looking for adult toys. Baby girl, have you been here?” Sarah would have bet a healthy sum that Vickie had an account here. After all, her wands had to come from someplace, and if her mom was right, this was the most likely source. “Uh huh,” Vickie muttered. She left it at that. “Well,” Sarah smiled brightly, “let's get you unbuckled, and then you and Auntie Rita can come inside with me, and we'll see what they have to offer!” Vickie waited for Sarah to unfasten her seat belt, and then slid out of the car. She needed a diaper change, and she knew that the shop had a restroom, but she was hoping to avoid the humiliation of being changed in public. She fervently hoped that she wasn't leaking. Vickie's heart sank the moment they walked through the door. She had done business with the young lady behind the counter on more than one occasion. “Victoria! It's good to see you again! And you've brought friends. Welcome!” “Hi, Jessica. Uh, these are two of my friends from work, Sarah and Rita.” Vickie nodded to left and right. “Sarah's in the market for an upscale paddle and a cane. Last time I checked, you had a really good selection.” “Right this way,” Jessica beamed. “Tell me how much you want it to hurt, and I guarantee you that we've got what you need. On a scale of one to ten, think two for an over the knee spanking, four for a ping pong paddle, five for a paddle with holes, and eight for a birch cane.” “Well,” Sarah laughed, “neither spankings nor paddling seems to have got my boyfriend's attention, so I want to move up. I'll need both the paddle with holes, and a cane.” “Good choices! I'd also like to sell you a whip, which comes in at ten, and I'll toss in a mannequin free of charge. If you haven't used a whip before, you really want to practice before turning it loose on your boyfriend. Whips and chains are not for amateurs, but once you master the whip, it will always be your first choice. Does he need a chastity cage?” “Do you sell them?” Sarah was getting really excited. “We have everything from cheap stuff that's good only for a bit of role playing to state of the art, stainless steel devices that can't be defeated, and with locks that can't be picked. Absolute control is guaranteed, or your money back!” “Fantastic! Show me … show me … show me! The best that you've got!” Jessica opened a case near the cash register, and brought out a life size replica of the male genitalia, and a small but brightly colored cardboard box. Opening it, she placed a ring and sheath on the counter, with a key that was already attached to an odd shaped lock. Reaching back into the case, she hauled out a small plastic piece whose purpose was anything but obvious. “Here's how it works,” she explained. “You squeeze the guy's balls inside the ring, and ratchet it closed, just like a handcuff. You want it tight, but not so tight that it cuts off circulation. Then, you slide his penis into this sheath; the best way to go about it is to tie a piece of string behind the head with a slip knot, and ease it into place. Next, slide this plastic cover into place on top of the penis; it will prevent pull out, which is the only thing that can defeat the device. Line up these two holes and these two pins like so, insert the lock, which is housed inside the ring, turn the key, and pull it out. That's all there is to it. Just ice his penis down first; the maximum length the cage will take is one inch. Oh, and for permanent chastity, just fill the lock with solder. Give him a choice between permanent chastity and a whipping, and I guarantee that he will beg you for the whip.” “Wonderful! I mean, really … wow! Thank you so much for your help; you've really got everything that I need. Now, could you do me a favor? My baby girl probably needs her diaper changed. If I get her diaper bag out of the car, do you have someplace I can change her?” Jessica looked around, not catching on to what Sarah was talking about. Then she stole a glance at Vickie's bottom, and broke out into a big smile. “Oh, yes, Sarah, changing your baby's dirty diaper won't be a problem. You can use the storeroom; there's a work bench in there that will nicely serve as a changing table. By the way, I'm Jessica!” “It's nice to meet you, Jessica … and again, thank you for all your help. Dealing with two naughty babies is really stressing me out, but with your help I'll finally have a fighting chance of bring them to heel.” “It's my pleasure, and if you ever need a babysitter, just give me a call.” Jessica handed Sarah a card with both her home and work telephone numbers. "And if you ever want to have a weekend free, I'd love to look after both of them. This one is such a cutie!” Jessica reached out to tickle Vickie's cheek. Sarah reached into her bag, brought out Vickie's pacifier, and slipped it into her mouth. “Baby girl just loves her binkie,” Sarah declared; “she finds it very soothing.” “Why don't you take her to the storeroom and get her undressed,” Rita suggested. “I'll fetch her diaper bag, and join you in a minute.” “Good idea,” Sarah crowed. “Come on, baby girl, let's go change your diapee!” . . . . When Priscilla returned to the table, she beat Ian to the punch. “Mom's sitting in the school parking lot across the street from your building. She's got a clear view of the entrance to your lot, but she says that the snow is piled so high on one old beater with California plates that she can't see all the way to the end of it. Somebody needs to get out there and clean that rust bucket off!” “I'll mention it to the owner the next time I run into him,” Ian said in his best deadpan voice. “If his girlfriend is the outdoors type, maybe he can con her into doing it for him.” “Might take a bribe.” “Rumor has it that the guy's just a big baby. He might get by with nursing on Mommy's titties.” “Be a step up from the bottles of breast milk that are his daily lot. I know for a fact that he's a tit man.” “The real question is whether he can keep his end up.” “You would have to ask his girlfriend about that.” “The last time I saw her, she had this big shit-eating grin on her face. If I had to guess, I'd say that the guy's got the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval.” “I want to make love to you ...” “We could go to your apartment … no … wait … bad idea. Mom's got your place under surveillance. Really bad idea.” “Yeah.” Ian let out a deep, regretful sigh, and slipped out of Priscilla's grasp. “We should be prepared to back her play. You're a cop, and I'm a secret agent who needs to get his toy back. Who else is in on this gig?” “My boss, Chief Mischof … and he's big on dramatic entrances. Trust me … he'll show up with lights flashing, siren blaring … it's quite a show.” . . . . “Rita, I have to get back to work; remember, through Tuesday next, I'm covering the first half of Heidi's shift.” Sarah was thinking about the tasks ahead. “So, on Friday, the two of you will have to deal with Ian's apartment without me. Can you manage?” “We'll manage.” In her usual thorough way, Rita had already gathered enough boxes to pack up Ian's kitchen, bathroom and closets. She would find out on Thursday whether he had the original boxes for his stereo and TV, or needed replacements. Amos would load whatever she and Vickie left behind Friday night on his truck late Saturday morning, and dump it in her garage to be sorted out later. She would deal with Ian's artwork, far the most valuable of his few possessions, personally. “And will you help, baby girl, or are you just going to get in the way?” “We'll get it done,” Vickie shrugged. “Providing that disaster doesn't strike on Saturday night, are we still planning to tackle my apartment on Sunday?” “Absolutely.” Sarah couldn't wait to see the look on Vickie's face when she discovered that her bed was gone, and realized that she would be sleeping in one of their hospital cribs forevermore. She planned to put the cribs back to back, so that Vickie and Ian could touch and even kiss, but nothing more. With his cock safely locked inside the chastity device, her baby husband would experience a level of frustration that she would alleviate only in exchange for his obedience. She was going to enforce the D/s contract that he had signed-- enforce every word of it. “Jessica's offer reminds me that we do have to think about babysitters for our little ones,” Sarah noted. She was talking to Rita, and making a point of ignoring Vickie completely. “After all, they'll be times when we want to do grown-up things by ourselves. Do you think that Jessica would make a good babysitter?” “It depends on her schedule, but if she's free when we need her, I would certainly try her out. I've been worrying about babysitters because I would expect Ian to try and charm them right out of their panties. Once we have him locked in that chastity cage, a lot of my worries are going to disappear.” “So, you agree with my plan to keep him under lock and key?” “Absolutely. If we're going to have babies, I don't want him touching himself, and I certainly don't want him having sex with other women. We're going to keep him very busy, so he will need to conserve his energy to satisfy us.” “Ian is still my patient,” Vickie growled from the back seat, “and I fully intend to complete his treatment successfully. Both of you have a role to play here, or have you forgotten?” “Not at all,” Rita smoothly countered. “Manny and I will get together sometime on Friday and set dates for the 'diaper your favorite nurse' auction. If the sessions take hold, all three of us will be able to summon Princess Poopy Pants at will. Working together, Vic, the three of us should be able to trigger a breakthrough with less risk than if you try it alone. Once he's stable, we can keep the Princess in reserve to help him through future crises.” “At least once I'd like to repress the Major and allow the Princess to enjoy life for a while,” Sarah added. “Who knows? We might discover that we like the Princess better, and want to spend more time with her!” . . . . “Let's sneak across the road,” Ian suggested. “There's a bank of pay phones off the hospital's main lobby. I'll ring Donnie, and if you want, you can track Amos down in the ER and confirm that everything's ready for tomorrow night.” “Sounds like a plan; let's do it.” What Priscilla really wanted to do was find a vacant hospital room. Making love with Ian had left her horny as hell. Rip his clothes off, ditch the canvas chastity belt, pray that his diaper was poop free, and then make mad, passionate love to the first man to excite her since her brief but torrid affair with her eleventh grade biology teacher. Not for the first time, Priscilla asked herself what the hell was wrong with Sarah. She had somehow latched on to a great guy, and yet she treated him like crap. Did she think that he could be taken for granted because of his diapers? Given that she was sharing him with two of her friends, that seemed unlikely in the extreme. Whatever her motive, Suzie Marshall wanted Ian badly, and Vickie wasn't having it. Their rivalry was common knowledge. Ian had had a brief fling with his department secretary, and neither of them was treating it like some deep, dark secret. The lady running his diaper service was clearly in the market for a husband, and just as clearly believed that Ian would fit the bill quite nicely. Ian was wounded in body and spirit, but he was gentle and loving-- a combination so potent that it amounted to an aphrodisiac. And Sarah hadn't simply spanked him … she had paddled him! What the hell is wrong with this woman? In the lobby, Priscilla assured Ian that she could find the ER without difficulty-- in fact, it had been only two weeks since her last visit, when she and another officer had transported a professor who had collapsed in his office from a kidney stone attack. Amos welcomed her with open arms, and assured her that he had already cached the supplies that they would need for the upcoming drinking contest. He was raring to go, and no, he would not agree to man up and wear a diaper. He wanted to give the other team a fighting chance, or at least the illusion of one. Male pride, Priscilla sighed, stubborn male pride. Still shaking her head, she headed back to the lobby. . . . . “I recognize the area code, but not the number. That you, Street?” “In the flesh, Donnie. Calling from a pay phone in the hospital where Sarah works. Everybody having fun back there?” “At your expense, you mean? Sure. Setting aside the worrisome fact that one of our most senior agents can pick up the phone and call Irina Orlov whenever he feels like it, your love life is the talk of the building. If you're taking pills, the Director wants the prescription. Seriously, Street. Four women? Where do you find the time, never mind the energy?” “No pills, Donnie. Sorry, but it's simply a matter of self-discipline.” “Yeah, right. Cook up something a bit more convincing, and the Director will cover the cost of your honeymoon out of petty cash. By all means, take all four of the lovely ladies with you to Athens, have a heart to heart with Irina, and then move on to that quaint little hotel you told me about on Santorini. Get Irina to give us a bit of raw meat, and it's a legit expense. Gotta keep the bean counters happy, know what I mean?” “Helps to have something to offer in trade.” “How about we loosen the travel restriction for their embassy personnel a bit? Say another fifty miles?” “I'll make the offer, but it would be nice to have some leeway. Say … oh … a hundred?” “We can live with that, but we'd have to have something meaningful in return. And I'm not talking about bathtub vodka.” “About Priscilla … Julia's daughter ...” “Listening.” “Not to get too far ahead of the curve, but we may need a security officer in house. She's the logical choice, and she's receptive to the idea of visiting Quantico.” “Sweet. You sure you can survive without your nanny for a month, plus?” “Not really. She treats me like royalty. Diaper changes are a real treat.” “It's hard to tell on the recording, Street. How did she handle the truth?” “A couple of bad moments, but she hung in there. She gives me hope.” “You got a plan for the encore?” “Saturday night. Priscilla is urging me to do a bit of editing, but otherwise to give the same account.” “Ian, they have to know. There's no getting around this … they have to know.” “Yeah. And one of these days, I need to apologize to Emily.” Ian was badly startled when he felt an arm drape across his shoulders. Mushy poop was exploding into his diaper as he looked to his right. Seeing Priscilla, he grinned with relief, and turned to kiss her lightly on the lips. Priscilla's arm dropped, to wrap around his waist. It felt so good simply to hold him tight. “Got to go,” Ian said as his attention shifted back to the telephone. “I'll call you at home on Sunday, and share the highlights.” . . . . “Am I the only one who thinks that Sarah could use some professional help?” From the back seat, Vickie was watching her colleague exit the parking garage, holding the box containing one of the breast pumps to her chest. “I mean, really, what's she going to say when someone yells out 'hey Sarah, need help? What's in the box'?” “Considering that we're all going to add a full cup size to our bras,” Rita replied defensively, “there's not a lot to be gained by keeping this a secret.” “So, you want us to follow her over hill and dale, all the way to the seventh floor? I can see it now … 'yeah, folks, that's right. We don't have babies. We're not pregnant. But gee, we thought it would be so much fun to breast feed the boy friend that we're all sharing, so the three of us are going into the milk production business'. Think that might get our Director's attention?” “You have a point. Maybe we should come back around … say … 2 AM?” “And in the meantime, have you noticed that I'm sharing the backseat with a friggin' mannequin? A MANNEQUIN? That crazy bitch wants to lock our boyfriend in a chastity cage, keep the key, and graduate from spankings and paddling to caning and … ta da … a whip. Rita, this is nuts! Please … pretty please … tell me that you are not good with this!!!” “Of course not! For God's sake, Vic, calm down! Do I have to remind you that yesterday Sarah had all the keys to your diaper cover, and today I've got one in my purse? Here!” Rita reached into her bag, grabbed the key, and handed it over. “I'll get your diaper bag out of the trunk. Go home. Take a shower. Have something to drink. I'll give you sixty to ninety minutes, then I'll drop by to lock you in a fresh diaper and send you on your way. You are going to Sarah's tonight, right?” “Right. The game plan seems to call for spankings all around, and I've already got a diaper rash. My usual kinky fun this ain't gonna be.” “Not much I can do about the rash. My advice is to keep going with your bratty toddler routine. Sarah seems to be lapping it up, and you've got me convinced that this is the real you!” “Well, of course it's the real me! I am a brat, and I need my mommy. What I don't need is a sadistic bitch ruining my life, or Ian's. This D/s crap has to be shelved until after we've managed his breakthrough. Until then, it's counterproductive.” “I wholeheartedly agree!” “Then prove it.” “How?” “Tomorrow night. Amos and Ian want to tie one on, and Priscilla has set up a drinking contest with a bunch of cops in a bar up northeast. It's pretty much drink until you pass out, and whoever pisses his or her pants first has to buy the next round. The four of us are challenging the best the cops can put up, and Priscilla is going to wear a diaper to give us the edge. But my diaper will be soaked before we begin … unless you come along and change me just before we get started.” “Are you suicidal? Sarah will skin both of you alive!” “Rita, I think Ian is having second thoughts about his relationship with Sarah … serious second thoughts. He's signed on to become her baby husband, not an abused slave. She's changing the rules after the game's begun, and he's not having it. Look, I want the man, not the baby; you can have the baby all to yourself. Push comes to shove, we don't need Sarah. Between the two of us, we can see to all of Ian's needs. So, are you in or out?” “In,” Rita sadly admitted. “But you have to buy me some time to try and sort this out. I'll stop by the bar and change your diaper, but then I'm going to lock you up for the duration. Take your punishment, even if it's extreme. If Sarah does overreact, I can use that to play the honest broker. I don't want to lose a friend, but she's letting her fantasies run wild, and it has to stop. If she doesn't come to her senses and Ian asks for our help, I'll do what I think is in his best interest.” . . . . Sarah was crossing the lobby, heading for the corridor and the elevator that would whisk her up to the third floor. She was planning to activate the breast pump, and make sure that the mechanical beast actually worked. A twenty minute break, which she would take in another hour or so, would give her a chance to try it out. Glancing to her right, she saw a man talking on one of the bank of public telephones beyond the receptionist's desk. Her pace slowed as she looked him over. He was facing away from her, but she would have sworn that it was Ian, although she couldn't imagine what would have brought him to the hospital. Moments later, a young policewoman came into view, her face lighting up with a smile as she drew near the pay phone. Priscilla, Sarah said to herself, remembering yesterday's events. Her name is Priscilla. She watched as Priscilla's arm reached out to grasp the man's shoulders. The man turned, his face startled at first but then settling into a welcoming smile. He kissed her lightly on the lips. It was Ian. Priscilla's arm dropped, to wrap around Ian's waist. Possession. Sarah's world collapsed around her. Blindly, fighting to hold back the tears, the breast pump mocking her every step, she stumbled on across the lobby and down the corridor to await the elevator. Mercifully, it was otherwise empty as she made the brief journey to the third floor, and took refuge behind the closed door of her office. Turning on the radio, which was always tuned to her favorite country and western station, Sarah collapsed into her chair. The breast pump now forgotten, she crossed her arms and lowered her head to the desk. Quietly, she began to sob. Perversely, almost as if a demon was taunting her, a tune began to play softly in the background, a song about love lost, sudden and unexpected … The jukebox started to play And night time turned into day As we were dancing, closely, All of a sudden I lost control as I held her charms And I caressed her, kissed her, Told her I'd die before I would let her out of my arms Oh, I was only twenty four hours from Tulsa ... Soon, Sarah's tears began to flow.

Big thanks to @kasarberangfor filling rhe meter with a donation of $90.69!

Thanks to @DAQfor donating $15!

Tony squirmed, and his stomach was grumbling. "Come on sweetie, drink the bottle!" Ella said. She pulled him closer into her lap, holding him tight. She held the bottle close to his face. He frowned. "This isn't fair Mommy. I don't want another bottle," he whined. "I already can't take any more." She smirked down on him, and bounced him on her knee. His diaper crinkled, and his stomach grumbled again. "I don't remember agreeing to any limit on how much I could feed you. The deal was you had to keep your pampers clean, not that I would then starve you." "But..." he said. She waved a finger at his nose. "Ah ah ah, no whining. You know Baby has to listen to his Mommy, right?" "Yeah..." he pouted. "And that Mommy always knows what's best for her baby?" "Yeah" he said again. "Then baby should listen to Mommy and drink his buh buh. Come on, drink up!" Tony frowned, but opened his mouth for the nip. She shoved it in, and he started sucking. Tony shuffled in Ella's lap, trying to ignore his stomach cramping. He squirmed as if trying to break out of her grasp, though he put no real effort into it. He was dressed in an outfit that was fairly normal for him at home- light purple shirt over a thick white diaper printed with bunny rabbits, pacifier tied on a string around his neck, and hair in pigtails, the only thing that was different from normal is his "Mommy" deliberately kept his skirt and onesies off so he "couldn't hide any accident in his diaper." The reason for that was the thing that wasn't normal for the night, the bet he had made. The bet seemed simple at first. Mommy would put him in his diapers, as normal. He would then be banned from the toilet, which happened from time to time. They had some of their kink friends coming over the next day, and if he managed to keep his diaper clean until bedtime, he could dress in normal "Big boy" clothes the next day for their visit. That came with special privileges. He could finally sit at the dom table, rather then serving them with the other subs. He could drink alcohol, rather then the normal juice and milk his AB sub status left him with. Rather then being teased and humiliated the whole night, he could finally be the one watching the show from a position of control. If he failed and filled his diaper, however, he wouldn't be. Instead, he agreed to let Mommy hypnotize him once the morning before and leave an instruction in his mind, without his knowing what that instruction was. The possibilities left him terrified, if a bit excited. She could make him act like a dog, and bark every time someone new entered the building. She could make him instantly obedient to any command, and get ordered around by the entire group all night. She could make him constantly horny, and eager for any chance and pleasure. The fact that he didn't know was what was most frightening. At first he thought this would be an easy bet to win. However, what he forgot was that the normal rules for when he played her diapered sissy still applied. That meant he had to do anything she asked, including eat or drink anything. So, after his eight bottle of milk, third bowl of beans, and constant force feedings of whatever Mommy found around, his stomach was turning with over an hour left before bedtime. "AH ah, stop squirming sweetie, or I may have to give you a spanking!" "I can't stop!" he replied. "My stomach hurts so bad!" "Then let go. Into your diapie. That's what it is there for," she smiled. "NO! I WILL WIN!" he replied triumphantly. Ella giggled. "That's a really proud way to say you MAAAYY be able to keep your diaper clean, MAYBE, if you try real hard." Tony groaned. His stomach turned, and he heard himself let out gas into his diaper. "EEEP! Mommy! Please no more!" he whined. Ella giggled. "Its ok sweetie, far from the worst thing I've seen you put into your pampers. Now drink your buh-buh." He kept drinking, and squirmed as he clenched to keep his diaper clean. Ella started bouncing him up and down harder, and he felt his innards loosening as he did. "What? Am I not allowed to bounce my widdle baby on my knee? Hear his widdle diapers crinkle? Hear his stomach..." "EEEP! Mommy!" he said as his stomach cramped up loudly. He began to sweat from the effort, and tried to distract himself by drinking the bottle, though the milk only made the feeling worse? "EEERR... ER..." he said, straining from the effort. His stomach grumbled again, and... BLAART! "NO! OH NO! NOT NOW!" He shouted his gut finally opened up and poured its contents into his diaper. Mommy giggled and kept bouncing, and he felt the mess grow and mash into him over and over. It was over in moments, but the damage was done. Mommy laughed out loud as she bounced him again, knowing she had won. "Oh no," he moaned. "Oh yes stinky, that's a full diaper. I won the bet," she teased. "But that's not fair! You didn't say you were going to force feed me all that!" She silenced him by shoving his pacifier in his mouth, which he knew came with the order for silence. "Now now, we both agreed to the deal. You were just so excited about maybe being a big boy for our friends that you didn't think things through, weren't you?" He blushed and nodded. "And isn't it that same lack of thinking and over excitement that explains exactly WHY you're my little sub in diapers and why I'm your mommy?" He nodded again. "Good. Glad you learned your lesson. Now, are you going to finish your buh buh, or am I going to keep bouncing you up and down in your poopy diapers all night?" He groaned. He was full, but the repeated squelching was already making him nauseous, so he sucked and finished the bottle. When he was done, she stood him on the ground and sniffed around him, then waved a hand in front of her nose. "Whew! You really did a number on those diapers. You stink like a sewer! No hiding that, eh?" He shook his head. "Good boy. Now, off to bed poopy pants, and we'll play our game tomorrow." She patted his bottom, giving another nauseating squelch. He looked at her with a pout, and she waved goodnight at him. He waddled toward his bedroom, thoughts about the next day turning over in his mind.

Yes! My libido is still high. I confirmed I have retrograde ejaculation. I messaged with Dr. Ivan and he confirmed I didn't have to wait at all to masturbate and orgasm. So I did that as soon as he confirmed. Nothing came out at all. The orgasm still felt good though. A bit different because I am still sore down there, but not painful. Thank you! I appreciate it. Hi 👀👀 Thanks! I am working from home and taking a rest over the lunch hour. I'm wearing a work shirt and... basketball shorts. Tomorrow I will go back to the office. I always bring a backpack and I am going to pack extra diapers in that. I have to say it has been strange feeling the constant leaks sitting at my desk chair. Yes, tomorrow will certainly be the real test for me as I'll be going into the office diapered for the first time.

I think there's a lot of good stuff (in the midst of a lot of low effort and no effort AI books) on Kindle Unlimited still, here's a few of my favorite authors: Pepper North: Dr. Richard's Littles is still my favorite but they have some pretty unique stuff as well with The Keepers and The Magic of Twelve. Paige Michaels: Works a lot with Pepper North and has the Littleworld (an AB/DL island resort essentially) and Littlecakes series. Amy Cummings: A large catalog of AB/DL romance novels, Mountainville is their current long series but I really like the early stuff they did as well. Elizabeth Chambers: These are my stories so of course I like them, but they are erotic novellas set in an AB/DL Daycare Center (The Padded Princess Playroom), and a college for AB/DL Nannies in Training (Diaper Discipline at the AB/DL Academy) Akumi Alice: Mommy Michelle's Diaper Discipline Store and Diaper Camp for Naughty Adults: One Summer at Moonraven are two books I go back to often. TS Little: Not super active anymore, but I liked the Littles Landing series a lot, it's a bit dark at times though. There's some good shorter stuff as well, but I generally agree that anything under 50 pages is pretty rough or underdeveloped. Still, I keep my subscription mostly for the few authors lited above

The simplest is just a rectangle roughly 36" x 36."

Finale Part 8 thanks for sticking around “Do you want to stretch your legs,” Jared turns toward Kristan. After the people in their row that seemed interested in moving had left “No I will be staying firmly in this seat for the rest of the night,” she says with slight annoyance. “no problem I’m gonna go walk around a bit do you want anything different you didn’t touch the nachos or popcorn.” “um well I would prefer a pretzel or pizza. But it’s not that big of a deal.” She passes her cup. “can I get tropical sprite or like strawberry Fanta instead of lemonade” He shakes his head, “you don’t really need any soda but okay” “apparently I don’t need anything to drink but you asked,” she scoffs. “you made the bed lay in it” he says with a stern look. “whatever” she rolls her eyes “fine, I’ll be right back” he says as he starts walking down the stairs. Kristan looks around the theater at the various people chatting entirely to anxious to stand up and make conversation. So, she sits there scrolling her phone. 20minutes into the intermission Jared makes his way back to the seats snacks and drinks in hand. Kristan reaches out for her drink but he reaches in his pocket and passes her a water. “I asked for a soda” she says with confusion. “I know and I got it. But I think you need some water. So drink that first please.” “I know when I need to drink water and currently I need a sprite. You are not my dad” He mumbles to himself sure am acting like it. “you know what you’re right. Here’s your soda.” “whatd you say at first,” she says with furrowed brows. “Nothing, carry on then,“ he says moving from standing in front of her and taking his seat. With both drinks in hand Kristan concedes and opens the water first. Downing half the bottle. They sit in silence until the lights dim at 6:45. “So excited to finally see this episode in theater,” he whispers. “same best piece of star wars lore in live action ever” The organizer standing at the bottom of the theater again: Alright I see a few seats still empty but text will be rolling in 5 minutes so sit tight. The chatter slowly dissipates until the lights go completely dark and a thunderous applause erupts in the theater. As they watch the episodes randomly cheering for various fight scenes. During the cuts of those scenes Kristan finishes her water and even starts to drink her soda. Jared occasionally glances at her actions surprised that she’s so willing to drink so much considering her predicament. Though the padding between her legs had faded to the back of her mind in all the excitement. But as the episode closes and she absently mindedly picks up her soda actually confused where half the soda had already gone. She puts it back down as the credits roll a few minutes later she feels the full pressure in her bladder. It feels like even the slightest movement would send the flood. The pain was even more intense than earlier. Then it dawns on her that she never actually emptied her bladder earlier either. But it seems she ignored any prior warnings from her body while she watched her favorite episode. Her leg bounced rapidly. Suddenly she realizes that Jared has been talking. “Hey hey are you okay,” he shakes her arm. “no I have to pee,”she whispers as she regains focus into the moment “You can go or do you to go to the bathroom” “I want to go to go to the bathroom but I don’t think I can even get up” “then just go” he whispers in her ear “I literally can’t.”, she says with frustration. “alright alright. Take a deep breath and relax. Stop thinking about it let’s just talk about the show. What’s your favorite part of that episode….. “ They keep talking and eventually she’s distracted enough to even forget she needs to go and then title sequence for episode 6 runs ending their conversation. She’s able to get through about 15 minutes before her bladder is back at full pressure. She stares at the screen intently trying to distract her self but is unable to. Jared catches her legs bouncing again. Whispering in his lowest tone, “just go,” He puts his hand on her bouncing leg to stop it. “I can’t not in front of all these people not in in my pants I… I just can’t,” she whispers back. “You’re thinking to hard but I have an idea focus on the screen okay. “ She nods giving every ounce of attention she can spare back to the screen. After a few minutes she feels his hand on her pelvis. She looks down but he lifts her chin, “screen only” he mouths as he keeps watching the episode too. He places his hand back on her pelvis and pushes down slowly. And with just a bit more pressure Kristan finally feels a warm liquid release into the slowly expanding garment. What starts slow quickly becomes a torrent. As Jared feels her bladder empty, he lets up and holds her hand. She looks at him, but he turns her head back to the screen. Kristan still filling the diaper she is able to actually focus on the screen instead of just staring at it. And as the flow eventually tapers off and she’s left with just the warmth around her bottom. It’s finally clicked what Jared was trying to explain earlier she didn’t need to break her concentration to do it. In this “diaper” she wouldn’t have to stop whatever she was doing for a “bathroom break.” She could just keep going whenever she needed to. Jared takes her hand and gives it a light squeeze. He looks at her with a smile and mouths silently with “you okay now?” she nods, I’m a lot better now, she mouths back. This is it for now.hope you enjoyed it. I know it took a bit to get to the diapers, and the falling action was pretty short for it to take so long to get there. But i feel like a journey is important sometimes. If theres interest (or if i'm bored enough) I may explore this relationsip further it will remain nonsexual. but tata for now

Posting your phone number online in a forum like this is not wise, presents risk.

I do love a good cliffhanger. But yes, parents do seem to be fairly normal and supportive. Not the type that are going to force baby someone for accidents like that. They certainly view the bedwetting as a random one-off event, which makes sense since Maddy hasn't has any accidents -- day or night -- since being potty trained. Obiously they'll have to re-evaluate that as Maddy continues to have more "accidents." We'll find out -- at least partially -- in the next chapter. Thanks! She's an important character in the story. I'm having fun with writing an older sibling for the protagonist since I haven't done that in any of my past stories. That's part of what I like about writing this story as well. There's a bunch of different directions it can go, which makes it easier to pull off some surprises.

Effexor (venlafaxine). I've had bouts of ic since I started taking this. It just got steadily worse. I won't know for sure until I come off it.

How about a compromise. In the Diaper Dimension or the universe of Amazons, instead of breast milk, is it too much to ask for a story in which the blonds are pumping out champagne, the phony blonds beer, the brunettes Scotch, and the redheads Irish whiskey?

Even though I live in Illinois there is no way I could afford to go to Capcon. Not to mention it is happening during the time period when my co worker is taking time off so it will just be me on the night shift. So I will probably sleep right through it anyway. However, I hope that you all have a lot of diapered fun together.

While I wear diapers most of the time they are still just part of me. They don't control me (my cat controls me enough as it is). Work is most of my life. However, now that I have moved closer to my mom, older sister, and brother in law I have also learned that family is also mainly important to my overall happiness.

There is a contracting sphincter reflex involved in response to the stimulation of the initial full bladder contraction, allowing us to then make the decision if it's appropriate to pee in that moment or not. This interesting short video highlights this.

Maybe because I can't smell very well, I just don't smell it or I just don't remember. I spent a summer in Arizona working as a ramp agent at an airport. I worked nights, helping park the planes, get the passages and luggage off and clean the inside of the plane and empty the septic tank and refill it with what we call blue juice, which is water and some blue pods that turns the water blue. I'm sure they explained what it all was, but I don't remember it. The job no one wanted was the septic tank because how bad it smelled, even though it was the easiest job. Good thing for, I couldn't smell it. Sometimes I'd get a bad oder, but it wasn't intolerable. So I volunteered every day. My nickname ended up becoming The Lav Guy/Man. One day I had worked 4 hours before my normal shift and I was put down to do the septic tank. When my normal shift started, I was put down to do it again. An hour or two in my supervisor apparently found out I had done that on the previous shift and came and asked why I didn't tell him, he'd have asked for volunteers. I said, why? He wouldn't get any and I'd still end up volunteering and doing it. Besides, for me it was easy without the any drawbacks lol.

Good luck on your journey into a new future. Best regards from Germany

Katie Ann What do you do when you look seven years old but you’re actually a college student in your late teens? For Kathleen’s entire life, she had fought against people treating her much younger than her actual age. Feeling obligated to grow up fast to show people she wasn’t the age of her size, Kathleen never let her inner child out. Tired of fighting against the world, she explores the adult submissive world. What she finds, however, is an enjoyment of regression. Had she made a mistake? Would life be better if she just let people treat her the way she looks at seven years old? By Becky Anne Proofread by Jamie M ©2018-2024 ~o~O~o~ Chapter Twenty-Three: Fastest Prize The following day, the two girls were woken up bright and early by Auntie tickling both of them. Sleep still in their eyes, they went downstairs. Again, like a sloth, to the table for breakfast. A bowl of cereal and some orange juice was set in front of each of the girls, and Katie was handed her pill. After breakfast was done, they were sent back upstairs to change. Auntie followed them to help the regressed girl with her bottom and help the girls get their dresses over their heads in the Curlformers. Stacy worked on putting the supplied white tights on while her friend's bottom was changed. Soon, Auntie helped the girls put a full petticoat over their huge heads, and Katie was putting her tights on while Auntie was busy with Stacy. Turning to the closet in the room, Auntie pulled out, what looked like to the regressed girl, brand new, matching dresses, except one was trimmed in pink, the other in light purple. Taking the pink one out of the clear dress shopping bag and removing the tags, she put it on Katie, then did the same with the other one with Stacy. After buttoning each of them up, she patted each of them on the bottom and told them to get downstairs so that she could work on their heads. Auntie started on Katie's head first, removing the bonnet, before removing the tubes, exposing a head of curly hair. After spraying the girl's head with a nice dose of hairspray, she tied a large pink bow in her niece's hair. She was soon repeating the same stuff with her daughter's head. Soon, Stacy spotted a bow that matched her dress. As Auntie was heading upstairs to join her husband in getting ready for church, Katie asked if and when she would see her Daddie. "He is meeting us at church, sweetie," was offered in reply. The two girls played quietly till it was time to leave for church. Auntie got out of the closet identical white knitted cardigan sweaters for both of the girls to put on. The little blended family then proceeded to head to the car to go to church. At the church, the girls and Auntie were dropped off before Stacy's father parked the car. As Katie walked into the church, she saw her Daddie standing around chatting with other church members with a cup of coffee in his hand. When he noticed her standing patiently by his side, he addressed her, "Hello Princess, did you have fun yesterday?" As he was chatting with her, he was helping her out of her cardigan. Katie started to excitedly tell him about her fun the previous day. When she was done describing her day, she was sent to keep herself occupied with Stacy. Soon, Daddie was ushering both the girls towards the Sanctuary, towards a pew that already had Auntie and Stacy's father in it. Later, after they were released to the children's church, Katie was happy that she was learning the way toward her Sunday classroom. When the small group of young grade school kids got to the classroom, they wondered why the teacher had a package of toilet paper on the table. Heather, who hadn't yet seen the two girls today, asked the matching girls, "Are you sure you two aren't two sisters?" Stacy gritted her teeth from laughing out loud because of being called a twin of her friend, who was actually over a decade older than her. Katie just shrugged and said, "Quite sure, though she makes an excellent sister," finishing with a smile towards Stacy. After sitting next to Stacy, Katie was handed a Halloween-themed coloring sheet. After a short Bible lesson, the children were asked to form groups of three. Stacy and Katie ended up in a group with another girl, whose name was Jennie. Each group was handed two rolls of TP and told to pick one person to be the mummy, and they had five minutes to wrap them with TP. Before it was even over, Jennie, who was the smallest of the three, was wearing both of the rolls. As the first ones being done, they won one of the candy prize categories. After they cleaned up the mess from the game, the children had a small snack before being released from the classroom. Katie led her friend back to their parents in the common room, where they were found with coffee cups in their hands, chatting to other members. Katie Ann let her Daddie know she was out of Sunday School before joining her friend on the bench to chat quietly. Soon, Daddie was escorting the two girls to the parking lot and dropping off Stacy at her parents' car. After strapping Katie in her seat, he started driving towards what she thought was home since she couldn't see her stuff in the back. Once they were home, they went up to Katie's room to change her into casual clothes. Once her bottom was dry, she was changed into a white long-sleeve dress. The dress had an attached black skirt and a black cat climbing out of a jack-o'lantern on the front of it. She then put on the black leggings Daddie had given her, and her socks and princess tennis shoes, while Daddie changed his clothes himself. She sat down on her bed to wait for him to finish while she looked around her room to kill her boredom. Something didn't look right. Something was different. Finally, it hit her. A giant teddy bear was looking at her from one of the turret window seats. Walking over to inspect it, she realized that it would be taller than her if it were standing. As she was looking at it, Daddie asked her, "Do you want to be inside that teddy bear again, Buttercup?" Realizing that was why it was larger than her, her face turned bright red, and she shook her head and said, "Not today, Daddie." "Good, the Bullards are expecting us for dinner," Daddie mentioned as he changed her bow to an orange bow before he led her next door for dinner. During the dinner, the girls were asked if they were ready to carve their pumpkins after dinner. That question caused the group to be rewarded with two excited girls. After Stacy's Daddie had cleaned out the insides of both pumpkins after dinner, the girls, with a painting smock on to protect their clothes, were handed a kid-safe pumpkin carver. They were told to have fun carving their pumpkin. Katie decided to go with a traditional face on the pumpkin, especially after she tried to make the first cut. She jokingly tried asking for a real knife, but both her Daddie, who was supervising her, and Auntie, who was supervising Stacy, refused to provide one. Stacy's Daddie, on the other hand, behind the camera, just chuckled at the two girl's struggles. After the pumpkin carving was done, it was time for Katie to get back to college. The two girls hugged goodbye, and Daddie carried her pumpkin home and set it next to the front door. Daddie led her to the Escalade. Then Daddie helped her in her child seat in the car before strapping her in with the five-point harness. She strained to watch him go to the house and get her stuff out of the house and put them in the back. Sick of having a crick in her neck, she turned to the ever-present bag of activities next to her and saw that the latest Disney Princess magazine was in it. She grabbed it and a crayon, and got comfortable for the hour or so ride to college. She briefly looked up from the story she was reading in it to notice they were on the move. Before long, Daddie was parking his Escalade in front of her dorm before coming over to let her out of her child's seat. Helping her out of the vehicle, they went to the hatch. He handed her the homework bag while he took her clean laundry and set her car bag that he was holding on top of it before closing the back. Together, they walked up the stairs to the third floor before walking into the cluster. Katie Ann tried her door, and she found it locked. While she was digging her keys out of her bag, Tiff greeted her with, "Hello, little sister," while smiling at her hair in curls and an orange bow. Katie Ann smiled back at Tiff while struggling to unlock her door. After she finally got her door open, she let her Daddie in first before following him. He had put her laundry basket on her bed, and she set the heavy backpack next to it. Bending down to hug the little girl, Daddie told her, "See you in two weeks. You will also spend Halloween with me." Nodding, she said, "See you in two weeks." Watching him depart, she set to work putting her laundry and a fresh supply of pull-ups away after setting the activities on her bed. Turning to her homework bag, she set that by her desk before digging out the library book from the bag on her bed. Seeing Tiff was in the common room, Katie leaned against her like she was a pillow before cracking open 'On the Banks of Plum Creek.' The older girl's reaction was to put her arm around the little girl. "Have an enjoyable time with your Daddie this weekend?" the ever-watchful big sister inquired. "Yes, Friday homework; I went with Stacy to a corn maze and picked out a pumpkin on Saturday, today church as usual," was the answer before she returned to her book.

I agree that a 5.000 ml ISO absorbency is enough for any real-world possible usage. What's still lacking is, in many cases, the capacity to absorb fast enough and then to evenly distribute urine on the whole padding before leakage does occur. A dream I have are some new-generation impregnable leak barriers that can fit on any sort of body and do work properly even under pressure (i.e. sitting down) or lying on a side. Another aspect that nearly no one has developed is a system to reduce friction against inner thighs once the diaper gets swollen.

To your knowledge and so far, had the surgery any permanent side effect beyond the urological ones? Is for instance your libido somehow affected or have you experienced retrograde ejaculation? That is, in case you already attempted to ejaculate after surgery at all!

Awww it was such a good story. Don't stop 😊

That’s great to hear. Given your earlier comments about the blockages and such, I thought you might have ended up in an emergency room. I’m sure we’ll all be interested in your experiences with your new condition. Even though I worked at becoming incontinent for many years, I discovered that “wanting” to be incontinent and “being” incontinent are distinctly different experiences.

It is so good to see you back and to see one of my favorite stories continues. I loved how you added the Monchi view here for continuity. Please keep going!

Chapter 91: Twinning I DIDN’T NEED a wardrobe change, but I figured a bathroom break was a good idea. I followed Beth back, and Gary ended up helping me out of the diaper and back in it afterward. Beth was in Isabella’s hands then as they styled her hair to match mine as closely as possible. The dress I wore looked identical to hers, just a smaller size. Both fell to just below our knees, which was unusually long of a dress for an adopted and babied Little. I realized they must have done a cut on Beth’s hair, too, so we matched even there. “You all cut her hair?” I asked Gary as I waited for them to finish. “Will we have to reshoot the other scenes she’s been in?” He shook his head, “She had her hair in pigtails for those, so other than the bangs, you can see nothing different there. It’s been a few days in time since her problem at the daycare. From a continuity perspective, it’s very possible she got a haircut. We’ll just go with it.” I nodded and felt a little more uneasy about the whole thing. “Carly?” I heard. “We’re going to begin filming while they finish with Beth.” Sebastian’s voice came over an intercom in the wardrobe area. “Wardrobe, heard,” Gary called back. “Time to skidaddle?” he smiled at me. I walked up to Charlotte, and she picked me up and stood outside the ‘door’ in the receptionist area. Ava scurried over and brought a pacifier she gently placed inside my mouth. I gave it a hesitant bite and a suckle, surprised by how comfortable it was inside my mouth and fearing it could be one of those inflating pacifiers I’d seen being used. Across from the door was a counter. The side wall showed a door to the daycare, and then the wall to the other side was open for cameras. “Quiet on the set!!!” we heard a moment later before “Action!” was called, and Charlotte entered the door. Charlotte walked up to where Amelia seemed to be chewing gum and working on the computer. “Well, hello there, Miss Ingels! I didn’t know you had another baby girl?” She stood up and greeted us, “She’s so adorable!!!” Charlotte bounced me up and down lightly and ran a hand through my hair before saying, “Well, baby Brianna just joined the family this morning! She’s actually a bit of a surprise for Callie?” Amelia said, “Oh?” with a smile, “She doesn’t know yet?” She almost squealed with glee. “Not yet!” she bounced me again and said, “I’m hoping maybe Brianna can help Callie get the hang of the big girl potty?” “Aww! We have a new buddy, huh?” I knew the script called for Charlotte to blush, but I wasn’t supposed to look at her. I found myself leaning my head on her shoulder as I sucked on the pacifier, though she said, “Yeah.” Amelia squealed, “Let me get little Miss Callie up here to meet her! I love seeing families grow!” Charlotte set me on my feet, and I heard, “Cut!” “How was that?” I asked. “Great, your lines were perfect,” Charlotte joked. “Actually, I loved it when you leaned into Sarah there!” Sebastian said. “Charlotte, did you have any issues? Honestly, I’m okay with that take right now?” “I am, but why don’t we do it again one more time just for safety’s sake. It’s a short scene…” She ran her hand back through my hair again, “Actually… Amelia, you’re not an acting major, but you come across with great instincts. How about we toss the script away and reshoot it without it?” “Huh?” She asked. “Kelly wrote some okay lines, but I think we could do better?” “Okay?” “And you,” she said, “I don’t want you silent the whole time. Callie isn’t going to come out with a pacifier in her mouth right then, so let’s have you without yours, and you actually respond to something?” I shrugged, “Okay? Respond how?” “However you feel in the moment?” Charlotte said. “We may never use this footage, or it may, in fact, be the best thing we shoot?” I nodded at that, “Okay.” “Places!” Sebastian said. Charlotte picked me up, placed me on her hip, and put the pacifier I’d been using in the hands of another crew member. “Let’s try this again,” she said with a smile. The call to action came, and we walked through the doors with me on her hip. “Well, hello, Miss Ingels! And who might this adorable princess be?” She smiled. Charlotte bounced me up and down, “Well, tell her what your name is, sweetie?” I leaned in on her body and said, “Brianna,” quietly. “Oh my, what a beautiful name for such a pretty little girl!” She said with a smile. “And how old are you?” “Twenty-four,” I said. “Oh my gosh! Twenty-four months?!? You’re almost two years old?!?” I blushed at that, even as she reached across the counter and booped my nose. “That’s great! You’re big enough to come here now!” she smiled. Charlotte laughed at that, “Almost, but not quite yet. Maybe in a couple months.” “I didn’t know you had adopted?” Amelia asked. “Just adopted this little princess today!” “Oh my gosh! Congratulations!!! I’m sure Callie will be so excited to have a baby sister!” Charlotte squeezed me tighter, “Well, hopefully, she’ll also be excited to learn how to use the potty with her.” “Oh…” Amelia forced her eyes open. “Do we have a new buddy joining us to help Miss Callie?” “That’s the plan,” Charlotte said. “And she doesn’t know she’s getting a new baby sister?” “Nope, it’s a surprise!” “Oh my gosh! I’ll get them to bring her down so they can meet. I’m going to make sure I can record it, though! I can’t wait to see how excited she gets!!!” “I just hope she gets excited about using the potty,” Charlotte said almost under her breath. “Cut!” I heard Sebastian say. “What did you think?” Charlotte asked. “Much better, that’s what we’ll use!” Sebastian said. “I agree,” Will added. “Is Beth ready?” Sebastian asked over the intercom. “On her way, sorry, the hair took longer to sort out than I expected.” I turned towards the wardrobe area and saw Beth step out wearing the nearly identical dress. The diaper she wore was covered by the skirt, but you could tell by the waddle and the faint crinkling as she drew nearer that a diaper was worn underneath. Anyone seeing us would be sure they saw a pair of sisters. ‘They’d probably think the baby sister was so happy to look just like big sis!’ I thought. “Okay, I know I shouldn’t say this, but you both look absolutely adorable together!” Amelia said. “No, you probably shouldn’t,” Sebastian agreed. “They do look cute, though; it will play well on the camera. Let’s get this show back rolling, everyone. I’m sure Carly would like to return to her normal self as soon as possible, and I’m sure Beth would like to have her hair fixed back to normal, too! Places everyone!” We both nodded and agreed and took our places. When we began filming again, Charlotte placed me on my feet on the ground beside her. The door opened, and a blur ran past, “Mommy!!!!!” Beth said as she ran happily to Charlotte. Charlotte picked her up and said, “Hi, Princess! Did you have a good day?” “Uh-huh!” She said, “We played house today! I got to be the mommy!” “You’ll have to tell me all about it on the way home, but first, I have someone I want you to meet!” Charlotte placed Beth down on the ground to look at me now. Beth said, “Who are you? You look just like me!” I fidgeted but waved and said, “Hi, Callie, I’m Brianna.” “She looks like you too, mommy!” Beth said. Charlotte knelt beside us, placing a comforting arm around each of our shoulders. “Well, she should, sweetie, because she’s your new sister!” Beth, Charlotte, and I had practiced this a little off to the side, and Charlotte had insisted Beth wait about four seconds longer than she thought she should. While she reached that count, Charlotte and I watched her, holding our breath, seemingly waiting to see if a bomb was about to explode. Finally, she began jumping up and down like a little kid with too much sugar in their blood, “Yay!!! I have a sister!!!!!” We were both held in an embrace for a few moments before she ran her hands over her face, then down our backs comfortingly, before she scooped us both up into her arms and held us on either side of her body. “I never had a chance to look at the TykeCare App. Did Callie try to use the potty at all today?” Amelia moved back to a tablet and pressed on it for a second. I knew the screen displayed the stat for Callie for the hours she’d been there. “No, she’s had three wet diapers and one poopie, but no potty tries. In her room, we don’t exactly encourage any, though?” Charlotte sighed, squeezed us both, and then replied to Amelia, “I know they’re more focused on baby care; just checking. I need to get these two girls home, feed them dinner, and let them play a bit before night-night time. We probably won’t return with them until my maternity leave ends.” “Sounds good! Oh, and I’ll email you here in a bit,” she waved her phone. “Bye-bye, Brianna! You’re going to love your new mommy and sister!” “Bye-bye!” Beth said even as we turned to leave out the door. “Cut!!!” BETH SIGHED FROM her perch in Charlotte’s arms as she asked, “Can we be put down for a moment?” Charlotte laughed, “Sure, Beth, my arms will appreciate it too!” Beth was grateful to be on her feet as Sebastian approached the trio. “So?” She asked him. “It honestly was probably better than anything the other groups will do…” Sebastian said. “Which means not good enough?” Charlotte laughed. “Okay, what do we need to do differently?” “Well, first, I think we need to get a couple of the HoloWorkers to watch the meeting and add some ‘awws’ to the mix in the background?” Charlotte nodded, “Yeah, I think this would be too cute to miss.” “I think you also need to just hug Beth on the floor, don’t stand up with her. It was a little awkward with the cameras refocusing on the two?” “Speaking of that, Sebastian, if we’re doing this again, I need five minutes to readjust the cameras?” “Go for it!” He told him. Sebastian looked thoughtful then. “Well, I have a note for what I saw,” Charlotte said. “Carly, you looked way too comfortable when Beth hugged you. Let’s get some awkwardness? Can you make yourself stiff as a board when she hugs you?” “Sure…?” Connor said. ‘Carly…’ Beth yelled at herself. Nothing in the last few hours had done anything to make Beth think ‘Connor’ was unhappy about being changed into ‘Carly.’ If anything, she seemed more relaxed? “Beth, let’s get you a stuffed animal to hold when you run out. I know the script called for Brianna to have a pacifier here, but I don’t want them in the way when she talks. Same for you…” “I’ve got a spare stuffed rabbit in the back?” Ben said. “We grabbed a bargain bin of things from Professor Wyler this week?” “Perfect!” Sebastian said. “Okay then, reset, and we’ll do this again!” Beth sighed but did everything she could to hopefully make it just one more take! Unfortunately, it took three more, and she was dying to use the restroom when they were done. She must not have been the only one because Charlotte and Sebastian had everyone take a break for lunch then. She’d enlisted Charlotte’s help to get her and Connor out of the diapers so they could both use the potty and then joined them for lunch. Throughout the day, Nikki had done her best just to blend into the background. She was always watching, but if Beth didn’t know who she was, she might have thought she was a random AI character. They had been going for seven hours at this point, and she was beginning to feel a little sympathy for the salaries her favorite actresses like Charlotte made! When they resumed filming, they breezed through several scenes with fewer takes per scene than they had been doing. Beth wasn’t sure if that was impatience to be done or just that Sebastian and Charlotte really felt like they were less important. The unfortunate part of them breezing through some less traumatic scenes was that they were also closing in on the worst of them rather quickly! They had just been filmed climbing the staircase to the playroom with Beth pulling Carly along and stopping.” “Okay, this scene will take a bit more setup time here,” Will told Sebastian. “We need to get both girls loaded with PooPloders now.” “Gary?” Sebastian called out. “On it, Seb!” Gary said and then pulled us both into the wardrobe area. Beth had been through the process before, but this would be Connor… Carly’s first time. Gary seemed to be thinking the same thing, “Beth, you want to hit the restroom, and then we’ll get you loaded first?” She nodded, “Probably a good idea!” He smiled down at her, knelt at her level, pulled the tapes loose, and patted her on the shoulder. Go ahead!” Beth wished it was that simple right then, but she had to do a bit of gymnastics with the body suit to keep it out of the way to pee. Even then, a single drop didn’t entirely wipe off when she wiped, making her blush! Carly switched places with her in the bathroom while Gary picked her up and placed a diaper underneath her bottom. “Just a heads up, this one will be a little bit more than the one we used before.” “Why?” She asked. “We need it to look both wet and poopy; we’re also going for a little bigger mess for the cameras?” She sighed, “Got it. Hopefully, we can do this scene once!” He laughed, “Don’t hope too much; it’ll cause it to be fifteen times!” “Bite your tongue…” she told him a little more tersely than he probably deserved. Carly exited the bathroom right as he held the PooPloder in his hand. “What exactly is it?” she asked Gary. Embarrassingly, he stopped doing what he was doing and showed the device to her. “This part will spray a special vapor that will react with the diaper’s absorbent core and make it look like a full bladder of fluid has been released into the diaper. We’re also going to pre-spray this diaper with some of that because Callie definitely wouldn’t last from her last daycare change through then without going a little pee-pee.” It was good that Carly was on the ground; she couldn’t see Beth turning redder than a fire truck right then! “And the other side?” “That’s the poopy side, we place each about where they would come out on the bodysuit, and then it means it looks like a convincingly loaded diaper.” “What’s the fake poop feel like?” Connor asked. “Sticky horrible goop,” Beth sighed. “Let’s get her taken care of, then we’ll get you set, and then you’ll get to figure it out yourself in a few minutes,” Gary said with a bit of a chuckle. “I agree with Beth, though; it’s pretty horrible. The only positive thing is it doesn’t smell.” Beth sat as still as she could as Gary pressed the PooPloder against her bodysuit, and it stuck in place. It was horrifying to be touched there, but she at least knew from the past week that Gary had no desire for anything she had. ‘And I think he’s a good enough guy to keep it professional anyway,’ she had to admit. He was very gentle as he taped the new diaper shut, and she realized it was already treated and expanded from the fake urine. “Eew,” she said. “Sorry,” Gary said. “At least it’s not water or something we poured down there? Or the old days when they would pump you full of fluid and hope you peed when they needed you to?” He had taped the trigger button for her unit inside her palm and covered it with some SkinSync makeup that hid it. “You’re not making this any better,” she told him as he lifted her and sat her on the floor. He laughed good-naturedly then and picked up Carly, standing her on the table first. “Okay, I mentioned I wanted to make sure we just had you wear the diaper earlier so you didn’t have any strikes, but a set of undergarments has to be under this to stick to it. Pull this up your waist,” he said to her. Beth saw what looked like a body shaper handed to her. It was a dead ringer for her skin color, and once it was in place, it looked like she was still naked unless you looked closely. ‘Like mine,’ she admitted. With that, she was pushed onto her back like Beth had been, and Gary started to apply the PooPloder. “Umm…” Carly said as Gary began. “Yes?” “Does it have to be you who does this?” “Pretty much?” Gary paused, “Why?” “I’m just… it feels…” “Violating?” He asked. Carly nodded, and Beth felt her own nod. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Thanks for reading! Please press the 'Like' button and leave me a comment! I am looking for the requisite likes to post on Sunday! I most likely won't have a third bonus chapter this week. After this week I'm hoping to get into a bit more serious of a rhythm of writing again. I'm working on Chapter 108 right now, so I definitely will make it to a full year of posting every week here a few weeks! (First time I've not had a bit of downtime at least at some point!) Thanks again for reading my works! Please consider purchasing a copy of my completed works from Amazon if you enjoy them! Having a small source of extra income there helps me keep the spare time to write for you all! https://www.amazon.com/author/babysofia

The Ballet Slippers - Chapter 62 TWO MONTHS LATER Isabelle leaped up and down, as high as she could, her legs extending out beneath her as she launched into the air, and bending as she landed, squatted down. She was simply full of joy. It was the night. The night. And the first part of the show had been wonderful Isabelle insisted on dressing for the part that evening. Jane knew when to pick her battles, and this was not it. Instead, Jaen acquiesced to her daughter's pointing at outfits before the performance which, in the end, was not as ridiculous as it otherwise might have been. Isabelle bent down once more to leap, her pale pink tights stretching comfortably as she did, pausing for a brief moment before her little legs launched her up in to the air once again. Isabelle smiled gleefully as she jumped, her pink onesie, (or as she liked to call it, her "leotard") sporting a slightly darker pink than her tights soaring with her little body into the air. Isabelle smiled as she felt the ground fall away beneath her, feeling as though she might never fall back to the earth. But gravity prevailed. It always did. Isabelle had landed the last several jumps, but when her special ballet slippers reached the floor this time, Isabelle lost her balance and tumbled on to her butt. 'It's no matter'; Isabelle thought, startled but unbothered by the impact. She had become used to falling. After all, balancing was very hard. One of the many benefits, however, was having a soft diaper to land in, particularly when it was already as squishy as hers was. Shaking off the shock from the fall, Isabelle resumed her antics. Isabelle had been feeling restless from being so patient and well behaved, at least in her view, during the first half of the show. So Isabelle continued to move about, taking advantage of the time she had to do so. Shifting her weight off of her butt and onto her hands and knees, Isabelle began to crawl around. The lights had just come on in the auditorium, intermission having just started in the show. Isabelle wanted to jump, move, and dance, just like the ballerinas on state. 'Just like Lola and Dani.' Isabelle had tried to get off of her mom's lap during the show, wanting to mimic the dancers then. But Jane hadn't allowed her, despite her loud - and embarrassing - shrieks demanding otherwise. Now was her chance. Isabelle felt like a real dancer that night, dressed up like a ballerina, in a fancy auditorium, and filled with spectators ready to watch. Sure, the audience hadn't exactly come to see her. But that was beside the point; they were going to get a special performance from Isabelle regardless of what they paid for. 'After all, I am the best in my ballet class!' Isabelle thought to herself. Isabelle began crawling the perimeter of the balcony, assessing what she might do. As she explored, Isabelle wondered about what routines she might be able to do from the floor to captivate her audience. Lost in thought, Isabelle crawled over her discarded tutu, laying abandoned on the ground. Isabelle hadn't been on the balcony five minutes before stripping out of it, Jane rolling her eyes as her daughter pulled the tutu down from her waist, and kicking to the side. Isabelle continued to crawl about, her mind wandering as it often did. The pattern of bunnies and carrots around her diaper was ever so visible through her tights as she crawled. The pink of her tights barely concealing the pattern of Jane's favorite heavy duty diaper to put her baby in, and to an onlooker, it was quite cute indeed. While the pattern may have been slightly faded, the bulk of the diaper was not. Nor was the obvious sag, the diaper already well used by the potty princess. Isabelle paid no heed the bulk which weighed her down. She felt special, being at a real ballet.. Lola had even bought Isabelle a special tiara she could wear for the performance that night. It hadn't left her head all afternoon or evening. If Isabelle had any say in it, it would never come off either. Isabelle truly felt like a ballerina princess. Isabelle eventually grew bored with her floor routine. Isabelle planted her hands on the ground in front of her, and began the herculean effort of pushing off her knees to get her feet on to the ground. With a final shove, Isabelle managed to push her legs up on to her feet, keeping her hands planted on the ground to stabilize herself. For a brief moment, Isabelle stood frozen, her hands planted on the ground, her legs slightly bent, and her diaper very much sticking out. It always took her a moment to stabilize. Isabelle kept her eyes focused between her hands until she was confident she was steady, the mass of her diaper spreading her legs further apart than she considered, and pressed out for her mom to see seated behind her. After her lengthy pause, Isabelle pushed up from her hands, spreading her arms out immediately to maintain her balance, and finally, was standing. Isabelle let a giggle out at her success. Isabelle waddled forward toward the balconies edge, spotting the balcony rail in front of her. Isabelle imagines the railing was like a studio barre, thinking of all the times she watched Lola practice on one when she accompanied her mom to pick Lola up at school. Isabelle wanted to show everyone that she could be just like Lola. Step by step, Isabelle waddled forward, her diaper keeping her legs far more spread out than usual. Finally, after what felt like a marathon, Isabelle reached out, and placed her hands on the railing above her head. 'Success!' Isabelle exclaimed in her mind, allowing another giggle to escape her vocal cords as pride overwhelmed her. Isabelle gripped the railing as tight as her sweaty palms allowed her, though her little hands could barely wrap around the gold-plated railing to really have a grip. Instead, Isabelle more or less placed pressed against it for stability, though at the angle, it didn't offer much. The crown of Isabelle's head barely cleared the top of the wall that the railing was attached to, such that Isabelle was staring at the red fabric in front of her, rather than the audience below. Jane and and Sam had had to take turns holding Isabelle during those portions of the performance Isabelle tolerated so that she could even see. But from this angle, Isabelle could see nothing. 'I want to see my adoring fans!' Isabelle decided, moving her hands from the railing to the gap that existed between it, and the top of the wall of the balcony. With all her might, Isabelle pressed her palms down, attempting to lift herself up. It was no use, however. Isabelle needed to adjust her strategy. In her second attempt, Isabelle bent her knees, wondering if maybe she needed the leverage from her hands, as well as a lift from her legs, to be able to see over. After all, it was really cool being on the balcony; other than watching her big sister and Dani dance, it felt cool to sit in one of the balcony seats, a place Isabelle knew was extra special. Isabelle bent her knees, preparing to launch herself. Ignoring the rumble in her stomach, Isabelle took one deep breath, and started to life herself once more. But something unexpected happened instead. Before she knew it, Isabelle felt herself turned around by her mommy's outstretched left arm. "Belly get away from there. You're going to hurt yourself," Jane said, as she reeled Isabelle in with her left arm, before lifting her up on to her lap. Whether it was shock that her mom could even reach her so far away from the seats, her mom's stern verbal instructions, or that Isabelle had been so completely lost in her imagination, Isabelle froze in her spot. 'I don't wanna not listen to mommy,' Isabelle thought, as she lifted herself back up into a standing position, turning her body to be perpendicular to the railing and her mom. Isabelle couldn't help but smile as she looked up at her mom's warm eyes. Isabelle looked up at her mom, feeling a joy and happiness overwhelm her. But it only got better. Isabelle felt her mom wrap her right arm around her, securing Isabelle in place. Naturally, Isabelle moved toward her mom, her remaining hand abandoning the railing, and with it, the distant thought of her make-believe ballet game. Isabelle completed the journey back toward her mom, resting her weight against her mom's left knee as Jane secured her arm all the way around Isabelle, now playing with her daughter's hair. Isabelle's hands moved up her mom's body, toward her free left hand which had been resting on her body. Isabelle's mind was immediately overtaken by her mom's left hand, and more specifically, one finger, where Isabelle found her little fingers dancing around the new addition to her mom's daily outfit; a massive princess cut diamond ring that was wrapped around her mom's ring finger. Isabelle started to play with the jewel, as she normally did, the the sparkles and refractions shining brightly in the recently lit auditorium. Isabelle had been smiling for weeks about how sparkly the jewel was, wondering if Sam might get her one too if she asked nicely. Isabelle's mind wandered between the sparkly jewel and the ballet as her mom was engrossed in a conversation about nonsense for all she knew. The first half of the show had been excellent; Isabelle got to watch from either her mommy or new daddy's arms, where she had a perfect view of the stage. Isabelle couldn't believe how amazing all the dancers were; she hoped some day she could be as good as they were. But above all, Dani, who was the star of the performance, and Lola, were the best. Isabelle thought it was really special getting to see them both on stage. 'I wonder if they'll ever get to watch me on stage!' But the show only started at 8:00 PM, and it was almost 9:30. Isabelle was starting to get cranky. As she felt her stomach rumble once more, Isabelle shifted her hands away from her mom's ring, and inexplicably, began smacking her mom's knees for the attention she rightly deserved. It had been nearly two months since Isabelle had even been awake this late, and she was feeling out of sorts not being in her routine. Isabelle was tired. Isabelle's stomach continued to gurgle, her hunger having been prolonged much longer than she cared for. Isabelle continued pounding her hands down on her mom, now letting her entire body collapse against her mom's legs. Isabelle settled a bit as she felt her mom's left arm wrap around her body along with the right, but still, her mom was talking to some stranger who Isabelle only now realized had come to their balcony. 'It isn't fair!' Isabelle thought, as her expression turned from happy to sour. 'She's my mommy. I want my mommy.' Isabelle adjusted her tactics. Isabelle found her body slipping off of her mom's knees, and instead toward the empty space between Jane's legs. Pushing the hem of her mommy's dress up, Isabelle's body now rested against the cushioned seat her mom was seated on. 'Now she has to pay attention to me,' Isabelle concluded, as she recognized that she was now six inches closer to her mommy. 'Maybe she just didn't see me before.' Isabelle was wrong. Jane continued speaking with the stranger, the two now laughing. 'Laughing?! Really?!?!' Isabelle couldn't believe her mommy was actually having fun with someone else instead of taking care of her. 'This will not stand,' Isabelle thought, as she began to audibly grumble, building something much louder up inside should it be needed. Without really understanding why she was doing what she did, Isabelle reached her hands up toward her mommy's face, as Jane continued to stroke Isabelle's hair. Isabelle had wanted to reach her mom's cheeks, but they were too far away. Instead, when her hands came down, they landed right on her mom's stomach, the soft and elegant purple fabric of her mommy's new dress soft against the palms of her hands. Still, Jane continued to chat away with her stranger friend, as the volume of Isabelle's whining grew louder. Isabelle continued to act on instinct. As her eyes moved from the profile of her mom's face, they traced down to Jane's soft neck. Her mom was sporting a beautiful necklace ,with jewels that complimented her mom's dress perfectly wrapping around her mom's smooth skin. But that's not what interested Isabelle. What interested Isabelle was what was below the necklace. Isabelle's stomach gurgled again as her eyes lowered a bit more, and were now fixed on her mom's breasts. The world faded away around her as Isabelle's focus became singular, salivating at the mere thought of the only thing that occupied her mind now. The notion that Isabelle had once been disgusted, or even hesitant, to nurse from her mommy was a thing of the past. Nursing had become such a regular part of her routine, Isabelle couldn't imagine life without it. 'Well, there was that one time mommy tried to use that machine to have her milk from a bottle....' Isabelle thought back to that horrid week, which fortunately, her mom had abandoned and resumed nursing Belly as she always had. Unable to wait one more moment, Isabelle reached out, stretching as far as her arms would allow, before her palms came down higher, but still below her Jane's breasts, which only looked more appealing to Isabelle in the gown that blocked them. Isabelle clutched the soft fabric of her mom's dress, and did the only thing she could think of - she tugged. And tugged again. And tugged once more, with all her might, practically pulling her mom's dress off. 'If this doesn't get the message across, I don't know what will,' Isabelle concluded Jane's eyes turned toward her daughter, meeting her desperate gaze. Isabelle smiled; her plea for attention seemingly worked. Jane freed one of her hands from Isabelle's hair, and used it to remove Isabelle's grip on her dress. Isabelle was startled that the first voice she heard was the stranger's behind her, which started with a laugh. "Well, I think I can guess what she's after," the woman joked, as a smile and stifled laugh emerged from Jane. "Oh yes. There is no stopping Belly from drinking all of mommy's milk," Jane responded. "Normally I would have fed her hours ago, so she must be really hungry. I'm sorry." Isabelle wasn't sure if her mommy was talking to her or to her friend, but she didn't care. She was simply relieved that her mom recognized that she was already very late on her feeding. "She must be exhausted too," the stranger continued, as Isabelle felt relief overtake her, her mom picking her up and setting her down on her lap. "Hungry and tired. Bad combination," Jane added, gently moving Isabelle's hands away from the top of her dress where they had returned to tug. Jane paused for a moment, her eyes darting around to assess the privacy of their balcony. In truth, there was some, but not quite as much as she would have preferred. 'I could go to the bathroom downstairs, but its not like there will be a nursing room in the school, so it wouldn't be private there either. The car is far, and a bathroom stall would be uncomfortable.' Sensing her dilemma, Sam spoke up. "Just feed her here, sweetheart. It's not a problem. No one is looking up here anyway," Sam added. "I'll let myself out," the friend started. Isabelle was glad to have some privacy, the act still not one she happily shared in the presence of others, other than Sam or Lola. And rarely, if ever, in public. "Nonsense," Jane interrupted, to Isabelle's surprise. "It's nothing you haven't seen before. Here, can you hold her a second?" "No problem! Come here my sweet Belly!" Isabelle couldn't believe it as her mom handed her off to the stranger, who eagerly took Isabelle up, turning Isabelle's body so they could look at one another. 'There is something familiar about this stranger,' Isabelle thought. 'I've met her before....lots of times even....' It wasn't until Isabelle's eyes met the woman, that she realized it had been Dani's mom in the booth chatting with her mommy. Still, Isabelle couldn't believe that her mom was not only going to feed her on the balcony, where anyone from the audience could look up or down to watch, let alone in front of Dani's mom....Isabelle was struggling; she was hungry. She wanted...no. NEEDED her mom's milk. If she fussed, she might be able to get her mom to move locations. 'But that mean's I'll also have to wait longer to nurse....' Isabelle squirmed as she struggled with her dilemma. Dani's mom simply held Isabelle closer to her body, which immediately put Isabelle at ease. "True," Dani's mom replied to Jane, "though it's been a long, long time since I was nursing either of mins. I am sort of jealous of you, it was such a special time to have them when they're small like this." "Hah," Sam replied, as he stood up. "You say that now, but you should only see the size of some of the poops this little one leaves us. You wouldn't be missing it then!" The three couldn't help but laugh, Jane recognizing how true it was. "Our little Belly is a big, pooping machine" "Oh. You don't get it yet," Dani's mom replied. "I miss it all. Even that," she said, before turning playfully to Belly. "Would you let me change your big poopy diaper if I babysat? Would you?" she repeated, tickling Isabelle's stomach with one free hand. Isabelle couldn't help but release a giggle as she did, unbothered of the content of the conversation. "I'll go refresh our drinks while you feed her," Sam said casually, as he left the balcony and closed the curtain behind him. Isabelle was left wondering why Dani's mom couldn't get drinks while her daddy stayed.... As he left, Jane shifted in her seat, turning her back to the general audience, but not taking much more precaution for privacy than that as she prepared herself. "Can you help me a second, with the zipper?" Jane asked casually, as Isabelle felt herself lifted up in the air, and carried around to her mom's backside. Isabelle watched as Dani's mom unclasped the top of her mommy's dress, and lowered the nearly invisible zipper down a bit. Excitement replaced hunger, as Isabelle felt her mouth begin to water. Slowly but surely, the shame of the prospect of being fed so publicly was dissipating. Isabelle felt herself being carried back down toward Dani's mom's seat, her eyes never leaving her mommy. Isabelle watched, her eyes growing wider and wider, as her mom slipped her right arm out of her dress, holding the strap up with her left arm for a moment, before letting it fall. That action alone wasn't enough to free her mommy's breast, but it would let her easily do so in short order. Isabelle's heart skipped a beat as she watched her mom reach forward for her, as Dani's mom continued to chat with casually, handing her off. "There you go cutie," Dani's mom started, as Isabelle was wrapped up by her mommy. "All ready for mommy's milkies now." Dani's mom said playfully, setting Isabelle down in Jane's lap, before sitting back down herself, and continuing to talk to Jane about their big girls, instead of the baby. But Isabelle caught none of the conversation, and not one word of Dani's mom's remark as she was handed off. Her mind was elsewhere. Isabelle's heartbeat was racing as her gaze never left her mommy. Isabelle watch as her mommy, almost glacially slow, shift her dress around and free her right breast from her dress. It lay inches in front of her, exposed to her wanting lips, exposed to Dani's mom, and indeed, for any onlooker with a decent angle, exposed to them as well. Isabelle thought she'd hesitate. She thought the prospect of nursing in front of someone who was not family would bother her more. Even more shocking, the prospect of doing this in front of strangers, in public, had never crossed her mind as something her mommy would ever do. Something she would ever be asked to do. Something that..... ....That she simply didn't mind doing. More than that. Something she wanted to do. As her mommy put her into position, as the sight of the smallest bead of milk emerged from her mommy's nipple. The bead of milk appeared to grow, and grow, and grow in size as Isabelle's head was lifted up toward that ever growing droplet. And just as she was millimeters away, Isabelle's hesitation disappeared entirely. Instead, Isabelle closed her eyes, parted her lips, and then sealed her mouth around her mom's breast, laying her left hand gently on the side of the breast next to her mom. Isabelle suckled. Suckled. And suckled. And suckled. Isabelle felt joy with every pull of milk as she shared the moment with her mommy, uncaring for anything else in the world. This moment, like every time she nursed, was everything she wanted. The muscles in her mouth worked hard to keep the latch to her mommy's breast, as she worked her tongue around the nipple to free the milk she so loved. Isabelle kept her eyes shut, the world and noise around her muted, falling away into her own perfect universe as she nursed. There was only Isabelle and her mommy. And of course, her milk. "Mine never got that big," Dani's mom continued as the two discussed their parenthoods, now bringing attention to Jane's nursing, and referring of course, with amazement, to the size of Jane's objectively enormous breasts. "Not with with either of mine. Not even close! Is it just more milk production? Does it get more sore? I bet Sam doesn't complain!" she added jokingly, amongst myriad of questions. Jane smiled as she shifted her gaze from her friend down to her breast, where her perfect little girl lay. "I was shocked too, and even asked the pediatrician. You can imagine what an awkward doctor's visit that one was," Jane started with a laugh, before facing her friend again, "because I felt the same way." Jane shifted her free hand slightly so she could stroke Isabelle's cheek, causing her baby to squirm at her mommy's touch. Jane laid furhter back into her seat to get comfortable as she changed her angle to put more of her back toward the general audience, creating an illusion of privacy. If Isabelle noticed, she dind't react one bit. "I felt like I was really packing A LOT of milk, so we asked Dr. Flasky if I should only feed her from one side, or half from each side for my own relief," Jane sighed as she felt indeed felt that relief, at least from her right breast, as Isabelle continued to empty it. Jane closed her eyes for a brief moment, unable to control her emotions as she smiled and felt the burden release, courtesy of her precious angel. "uhmm...Sorry," Jane said embarrassingly, before continuing. "Anyway, Dr. Flasky just said that if she's full she'll stop. So I started doing half feedings on each side about 5 weeks ago, and tried pumping the rest. But she threw a fit, and seemingly kept wanting more. Tantrums every time we tried to use the pumped milk in a bottle. So I just took the doctor's advice and....well she just drinks it all. Every last drop," Jane said with too much of a hint of satisfaction, before turning to her angel. "Isn't that right my hungry hungry girl?" "Wow, seriously?" Dani's mom replied, genuinely shocked that the little girl had such an appetite. "Yup," Jane responded, "not to mention that she's eating solids too, and has quite an appetite for those. I don't mind though. I don't think either of us is ready to start weaning. Not yet, at least." "She's so small you'd never expect it," Dani's mom continued. "Mine weren't such big eaters, which is amazing to think about, because Dani eats more than my teenage boy. I have no idea where it all goes..." "Well, we know where this one's goes," Jane said smiling, tickling her daughter's feet as she could feel Isabelle suckling harder as the stream was coming to a stop. Isabelle suckled away gently as her mom and Dani's mom had been chatting about various things, none of which concerned her. She heard mention of doctors, and eating, but without context, or interest, Isabelle focused on what was far, far more interesting. Isabelle was disappointed as she felt the flow of milk begin to slow, and was lifted up back on to her mommy's lap. But Isabelle had grown used to the process, and she knew it would only be moments of waiting. Sure enough, it was only a few seconds before Jane had shifted her right breast back into her dress, freeing her left, and shifting Isabelle to the other side. Isabelle was soon latched on to her mom's left breast, free to suckle away once again, the thick and heavy stream of milk satisfyingly coating her mouth, throat, and stomach. Isabelle's eyes grew heavy as she worked her lips and tongue. More and more, Isabelle found that feeding from her mom took a lot out of her, and oftentimes, she fell asleep latched. Isabelle didn't hesitate as she released her bladder in her exhaustion, not that she would have considered holding it otherwise, as she lay on her mom's lap. Her diapers never failed her, absorbing the liquid despite already being reasonable saturated. Isabelle felt her mom's hand slip under her diaper, her hand patting rhythmically against the warmed plastic exterior. The comfort of her mommy's hand only caused Isabelle to pee more. But that wasn't a problem. It was never a problem. Isabelle was half asleep, a mixture of drool and milk cascading out of the broken seal of her latch, and down her mom's breast, shortly thereafter. Isabelle caught moments of Dani's mom fawning over her before excusing herself, her daddy coming back and lifting her up, brief images of her mom shifting back into her dress, and one vivid memory of her daddy patting her back before Isabelle released an all too common, loud, milk-belch. Isabelle let her head fall into the crook of her dad's neck, as a pacifier satisfyingly slipped into her empty and longing mouth. Isabelle didn't remember the start of the second half of the show. The last memory she had was of her nuzzling against her daddy's freshly shaven neck, his arms wrapped around her, and the lights in the auditorium fading Isabelle's ear was pressed against Sam's body, as she listened to his heartbeat; steady, strong, and comforting. Isabelle thought about counting the number of times it beat, but there was no use. Isabelle fell fast asleep on his shoulder, and in his arms, before she could muster the count to "one." ************************************ "Entering wreck. Crew, it looks like we're finally going to make it." Investigator Space Captain Isabelle straightened her arms, and like a torpedo, dove down through the broken hole in the ship's hull. In all her years as an Investigator Space Captain for the Rainbow Command, Isabelle had never endured a mission so difficult. Delays, negotiations, atmospheric dangers, all on a distant and new planet, with creatures her homeland could hardly even fathom. A promotion was awaiting her at home. 'Perhaps even Investigator Space Admiral....' Isabelle thought to herself. But that could wait. She needed to focus. 'The mission is not complete yet.' The treasure would soon be hers. "Captain's log. I have finally managed to get back into the ship, with the key in hand. The crew, the greatest in the entire command, deserves all the credit." It was true, Isabelle thought, reflecting on their journey over the last few months. Isabelle turned her body upright and gently kicked her feet as she navigated the ship. She had thought that once she acquired the Clam Conjurer's pearl, all would be settled. Isabelle laughed to herself as she thought about all she, and the crew, had endured since. "Log. At every turn, we were stymied. After the storm was quelled, we had to deal with what is being dubbed as "The Great Freeze," an unexpected climate insurgence caused by the Great Space Penguins of the outer rim." Isabelle recalled how cold it had gotten after the freeze. The penguins were absolutely adorable, even now she could hardly believe the mayhem they had caused. Isabelle couldn't help but smile as she pictured their little heads in their spacesuits. Isabelle was also thankful First Mate Rabbity (yes, he had earned yet ANOTHER promotion) had developed an encased sleeping suit to conserve the entire human crew's - (population, Isabelle) - warmth at night. The soft fleece material even came with a zipper on the back so someone could help her in and out of it. It even covered her feet! "But that was hardly the worst of it Log," Isabelle continued to narrate, as she darted, turn after turn, until she made her way to the room with the secret entrance concealed within. Isabelle's stomach bubbling with anticipation. "After the thaw, we had to deal with the berg crisis. Then the great floods ('How a water planet has floods still escapes me!') And then the Midnight Moon fiasco. There was the Shocking Eel Sitch, the Toothless Shark Tantrums, and even the Mermaid Mumble Mystery that all needed to be resolved so that we could arrive at this moment. And here we are." Isabelle didn't bother mentioning the cosmic pressure system had never relented; it had been well documented already. As had another of Rabbity's inventions. Changing Isabelle had turned out to become an almost full time the task, based on the level of pressure and the amount of V.2 C.R.I.B.s she was going through. It was becoming a burden, on the rest of the crew and was distracting the crew from their duties. So Rabbity came up with another solution. Rainbow Command's newest ships would all be equipped with new robots, dubbed the Maternal Orderly Moisture Monitor Yield and the Diligent Action Diaper Duty Yuck systems. The crew had come to calling them Mommy and Daddy for short. The Mommy system handled the wet C.R.I.Bs, while the Daddy system handled the stinky ones. The Mommy bots were specifically outfitted with nutritional supplements, just in case they were needed too. It had come in handy more times than Investigator Space Captain Isabelle had anticipated. Isabelle had learned to truly love that aspect of the Mommy bots. The solution allowed the crew to return to their essential duties. While the crew ran the ship, the Mommy and Daddy prototypes were free to look after Isabelle. Rabbity was convinced he could modify them to look after more than one human crew member if needed, but said that "it would require at least 9 months of calibration for the Mommy bots could generate the capacity to care after a second human crew member. The Daddy bots, on the other hand, would need a software upgrade akin to a book." Isabelle didn't really understand the technical aspects of it. But it didn't matter. The Mommy and Daddy had both done an excellent job monitoring and changing Isabelle's C.R.I.Bs whenever was needed, wherever was needed. Isabelle was freely changed in any and every location of the ship, as the Mommy and Daddy followed her around and watched over her. Mommy and Daddy were, without a doubt, Isabelle's favorite inventions. "Log. Here we go. The moment we have waited for. Entering secret passageway. Approaching the treasure room." Left, right, right, down, up, every direction; Isabelle made her way back through the ship's secret labyrinthine corridors until she arrived at her destination: the dusty, room, once covered in cobwebs. It was exactly how she left it. With a flicker of excitement, Isabelle pushed aside a the debris from the fallen crate she had seen so many months ago, revealing the chest hidden beneath the planks that had shifted over it. "Chest has been located. Pulling out key to insert." The chest was adorned with the intricate carvings Isabelle had dreamed so often about. In front of her, the chest's golden lock was gleaming in the faint light. With trembling hands, Isabelle reached for the key kept securely in her zipper pouched, and moved it toward the chest. There was no guarantee the key would even work, and Isabelle knew it. All she could do was hope. Isabelle's hand's continued to shake and tremble as the key made its way closer. All the answers she had worked so hard for. Everything she had done, and worked toward, since........ ....'huh...when did this all start again.......' Isabelle found herself asking, as her hand moved forward. Isabelle shrugged it off. It didn't matter how it started. 'Right now....I just...need to know.....know wh-.......know what happened.' Isabelle told herself. Her hand steadied, and moved close to the chest, key in hand. And closer... And closer...... And...... *CLICK* Isabelle heard the lock click, just as the golden lock opened. For a brief moment, the world froze, and nothing happened at all. What happened next, however, was remarkable. The ground around her began to tremble, louder, and louder, until it felt as though there was an earthquake. All around Isabelle the ship began to break apart, falling around her. Isabelle thought about panicking, about fleeing. But for the first time in a long time, she felt so sure. So confident that she would be safe. Confident that what was going to happen, what she was going to learn, that it was going to reveal everything. Before Isabelle could even move, a golden light burst forth from the lock and key, surrounding Isabelle in a golden bubble. Isabelle didn't have the capacity to understand what was happening, or how it was happening. - it was all simply too remarkable to witness. And it was happening - she was part of it. Isabelle watched as the ship continued to break apart all around her, disintegrating, as though it was turning to dust, ang then nothing, disappearing into the water around her. Yet nothing could pierce the golden shield that encased Isabelle and the treasure. they were protected within. It was a remarkable sight, watching as the ship fell away, until it was gone. Just like that. Poof. Suddenly, there was nothing left but Isabelle and her treasure, as the golden shield that surrounded slowly dissolved away, much like the ship had. Nervously, Isabelle reached out to open the chest. But she never got the chance. Suddenly, the chest burst open, a golden light beaming out of it, and shooting up into the sky. The light expanded and expanded in every which direction, spreading as far as the very edges of the planet. Isabelle attempted to shield her eyes from the light, but quickly found that the light wasn't bothering them. With one strong stroke, Isabelle swam up to the treasure, its contents floating up until they were right in front of her face. There it was. The treasure. Smack in the front of her face, floating right there in the oceans of Aquaria, was a pair of ballet slippers. Isabelle's ballet slippers, in fact. Classic point, narrow, medium and square box, stiff, and Isabelle didn't have to guess; she knew they were the perfect size. "What...on...earth...Wha.." Hesitantly, Isabelle reached for the pointe slippers, inching her arms forward through the ocean water slowly as though they were the most delicate shoes in the world. As her hands were inches from the slippers, she felt something and froze. 'No.....its....heat...' Isabelle knew, as the vibrations of the shoes sent waves of warmth through her body. And suddenly, Isabelle understood. It was the ballet slippers. It had always been the ballet slippers. Her ballet slippers. It was the source of it all.

Chapter 25: Brute Force Little in Love 2 – LittleFallenPrincess I sat there, my whole body trembling with fear, as I watched Charlie place the disc into the player. If this worked… I’d… I’d be acting just like how I acted with Madison all that time ago. My adult self would be locked away within me as I filled my nappies, giggling and clapping. And there was nothing I could do to stop it. Whatever was going on with Charlie would prevent her from using our safeword, the one that activates the nanites and reverts any changes made, creating an immunity afterwards. Ever since we learned of the immunity, we started exposing me to various hypnosis, then instantly safewording to revert me back and create an immunity. I mean how else could I stand up on stage in front of hundreds, sometimes thousands of people, and give a speech, if I was at risk of some arsehole coming up and showing me a screen and turning me into a drooling, pants-wetting baby? The reason I got up every time was because I had the safety net of my nanites. But this… this was a new form of hypnosis, and we have no idea whether it’ll need immunising against, or if it’ll even work at all. I guess I am about to find out… Charlie grabbed the remote, grabbed me out of the playpen I had been put in, and walked back over to the sofa, placing me down on her lap and snuggling me. If this wasn’t one of my worst nightmares, this cosy time with her would have been perfect. But not when I’m about to have my mind wiped. I mean… would the safeword even work, if someone does manage to come rescue me? “Comfy, baby?” Charlie asked in that sweet, maternal way. I grunted at her to show my lack of approval. It was all I could do with this dummy still in my mouth. She really didn’t want me talking, so the dummy stayed in most of the day, only coming out for feeding times. I guess she’s waiting for me to be regressed so she doesn’t have to deal with a brat. “Need to go poopy, already?” I pouted and crossed my arms. “Such a silly baby!” She said, squeezing me tighter and lifting the remote control. ‘Here we go…’ I thought to myself, before my mind drifted off, to something I wasn’t expecting to think about as a last minute thought before my mind was wiped. ‘I wonder if Madison really did go through what I’m about to. I hope so… to have her mind wiped, changed… changed… wait… she was hypnotised… or was supposed to. LIBRA has the tech to… Someone must have gotten to… when she was out… a mole… must have saved Madison… I…’ That’s when I had my epiphany. About three seconds before the colourful characters on the screen distracted me. And there went my epiphany. Flushed into the back of my nappy. What was I thinking about? I can’t remember. All I remember is being snuggled up with Mummy, watching this fun show with those silly animal people! It’s a lot of fun, and they are soooo silly! Mummy is silly like that. She likes to blow raspberries on my tummy and do silly voices and noises and stuff when she reads bedtime stories to me! I love my Mummy. She’s all I need. I think I may have had big girl thoughts at one point. But I don’t need them. Not like I need Mummy. “You okay, babygirl?” Mummy said, lowering her head and kissing me on the head. I nodded and smiled behind my huuuuuuuuuge dummy, clapping my mittened hands together and wiggling in her lap. Mummy freed one arm and used it to take my dummy out of my mouth. “How are you feeling, sweetpea?” “Blabahabbabhhaba!” I replied, excitedly. “D’awww, there she is! There’s my little one!” See, Mummy understands me! Why would I need silly big girl words when I only need Mummy to understand me. “Who’s my precious little angel?” Mummy asked in that silly voice she only does for me, before lifting my dress up and tickling my tummy slightly, making me squeal and kick my ickle legs. “Baahhabbaa!” I responded, as I giggled away, feeling loved and cared for. “That’s so much better. Now we don’t need this silly dummy as much. We can use a normal one, now we’re not worrying about a silly so-called ‘big girl’ making a fuss.” “Bahhabbbbbabababbbbaba!” I clapped my hands as Mummy pulled her hand away and wrapped her arm around me again. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you never grow up, my sweet little angel. Though hopefully… that program will have ensured that never happens anyway.” Mummy put on a fun movie for us to watch, one about a Mummy and her bratty baby girl, at least she was before her Mummy tamed her. Much like me! …I think. I’m not sure, everything is a bit hazy. I didn’t really care that much for the movie though, I was mostly just happy being in Mummy’s arms, resting my head on her chest. A bunch of time passed and I nearly fell asleep snuggled up to Mummy, so she said it must be nap time. Which made me super sad, as I didn’t wanna nap! I wanted to stay with Mummy! Thankfully, she knew just what I needed, and took her top off, lowering her nursing bra, and quickly nursed me as I lay in her arms. The warm milk, mixed with the gentle humming and the warmth of Mummy’s body… together helped make me even sleepier. As the warm milk flowed into my tummy, the taste sent tingles down my body… I could feel my limbs get heavier and heavier, until I was unable to move. The heavy sensation reached my eyelids as they struggled to stay open. So whilst I looked up at my beautiful Mama… a warmth in my heart reminded me that… that I was better off this way. With Mama. I awoke in my crib, surrounded by all my favouritest stuffies. But no Mama. So after crying to get her attention, I was ecstatic to see her walk into the nursery. What I wasn’t happy about though… was my early bedtime. “Babhahbaha?” I asked, trying to wonder why I had to go back to sleep so soon after waking up. “You were asleep for a long time, it’s already evening, sweetpea. And newborns need lots and lots of sleep.” ‘Newborn? Is… is dat me?’ I thought to myself as Mummy lowered the crib railing and climbed in, resting her back against the other crib wall. “So I’m going to nurse you again, then put you back to sleep. Got to train little newborns like you to sleep lots. So we’re starting tonight.” Mama announced. Normally, I would have cried a bit and tried to argue against such an early bedtime, but Mama knows best. And if she says I’mma newborn an I gotsta sleep lots… that must be it, right? So I smiled up at her as she picked me up and laid me in her arms once again. I mean… I was going to get nursed again, so it can’t be all bad, right? I love nursing from Mama. Mama proceeded to nurse me as I felt sleepy once again, thoughts about being a good girl and obeying circled my mind, all using voices from that show I was watching earlier. And once my tummy was full and I was feeling blissful once again, I drifted off back to sleep, as if someone had flicked a switch off. “Morning Princess!” Mama announced as she walked into the nursery and pulled the curtains open, letting the sunlight invade my sleepy space. I tried to roll over and get back to sleep, but found my body wasn’t very responsive right now, and the sunlight was still blinding me. So I did what came naturally to me… I started crying. “Aww, Princess… I’m sorry. But you need to get up. We’ve got deliveries coming in a couple of hours and I need you fed, dressed and ready. We’ve got a lot of fun and you’ve got a surprise coming. Or should I say… surprise person!” “Bahahbba?” I replied, my crying stopping at the excitement that I was getting a surprise. I love surprises! “When Marianne comes to deliver the things I ordered yesterday, she’s bringing her little one with her. So you’re going to have a little playdate!” Mummy said, sounding super duper excited about it. Which got me feeling super duper excited, as Mummy always knows what is best for me. So it must be good. I don’t remember Miss Marianne’s little one. I remember a boy… he was a bit taller than me… but that’s all I remember. Something about a Nanny or a toy or something? A ball pit? Problem was, every time I remembered a slight memory of this boy, my head hurt. And the more I remembered, the more my head hurt. So after a few stabbing pains in my head, I just stopped trying to think. I mean… who cares, right? I get a playmate to play with! He can help me play with some of the toys that are a bit too big for me. Mummy got me dressed in a cute pair of shortalls and a pink T-shirt that said ‘Mummy’s little Princess’. Because that’s me! I’m Mummy’s little Princess! Which makes Mummy the Queen! Rightfully so too. Cus she’s extra special and amazing and lovely and perfect and I wuv her. That was after a very icky change, as apparently the milk had ‘worked wonders’... whatever dat meant. Then my Queen Mummy carried me down the stairs to the kitchen, where my throne awaited, the one with the tray and the locking straps. I really enjoyed feeding time with Mummy, she made all the plane and train noises when she brought the spoon full of yummy mushy food up to my mouth, which made me giggle a lot! I swear she even missed a few times on purpose, just to make me giggle. And whilst the brown mush looked yucky, it tasted super good! And Mama said because I was such a good girl eating all my food, I got a bottle full of Mummy’s milk as a reward! Though I suspect I was gonna get that either way… cus I’m a Princess. “Right, let's get you set up in front of the TV for when Marianne and Stephen turn up. We can test a few of the surprises I’ve gotten on the two of you. Oh it’s going to be so much fun!” Using a wipe to clean up my mucky face, and calling me a mucky pup in the process, Mama then took my bib off and threw it in the big swirly machine, before unbuckling me from the highchair and lifting me up into the air and bringing me close to her chest. Whilst I enjoyed the silliness and fun of being thrown up into the air, my tummy did not, as it started making funny noises. “Baubashdbabbbbb!” I cried out to Mummy. “What’s up, baby?” Looking up at her beautiful face with wonder, I smiled and reached up, planting a kiss on her cheek and falling back into her arms, happy that I had gotten to do that. “D’aww… my precious baby. I love you too!” Butterflies fluttered around my tummy as I snuggled my face into her shoulder. This… this was the best feeling ever. “Right, little munchkin, let’s get you in your playpen. Mummy has a lot more work to do to edit her book. I can’t believe I was even writing that rubbish in the first place. This new idea is much better. I’m glad my new publishers saw my potential.” “Blhababmmsba!” I babbled as I suckled on my fist, all whilst being carried into the living room and being placed into the playpen. And so I got to work building my tower… or at least I would have… if my arms and legs would behave. Problem is… they weren’t responding very well. It was like dis morning, when I could barely move. It feels as if all the strength in them has been sapped away. Which is very silly, but I guess I don’t really have any need for it. Mama does everything for me anyway and these blocks are a bit too big for me. Instead, I’ll play with the silly phone and stuff. Oh and the one that spins and makes animal noises! I like it when it goes moo! So whilst I played happily in the playpen, Mama got to work with her computery thingy on her lap and put some cartoons on the TV for me, which distracted me a lot. After another of the episodes finished, and after I had exhausted the fun of the animal noise machine, a ringing noise came from the doorway. “Oh, that’ll be the delivery and your playdate!” Mama said, putting her computer to the side and getting up off the sofa, walking off towards the hallway. I was super excited about having someone to play with. Maybe he can lift the blocks for me instead! That’s when I heard a familiar voice. One I swear I had heard before. Problem was… I couldn’t remember whose voice it was. Or whether it was a good voice… or a bad one… “Hi Charlotte. I’m here to see Olivia.” ======================================================= *sets up a deck chair and grabs some popcorn and waits for the yelling* If you haven't seen, I'm now up and running on Subscribestar! (Sorry for the reminder again, trying to get my subscribers back after the Patreon rubbish!) Hoping to start the new SubscribeStar exclusive short stories with a trial run in January! if the first commission goes well, I'll see how many I can handle per month (thinking about 2 per month. These stories won't be posted here at all.) ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my patrons for their support over the past couple of years! Seriously, your support meant the world to me, and I hope to be set up somewhere new soon. New chapters of Little in Love 2 every Wednesday/Sunday! Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post! Thanks!

Two and a half weeks in and it is insane how unnoticeable it is 99,9% of the time. Only when my half full bladder empties itself when I have been lying in bed on my stomach I can feel the bladder neck repositioning itself around the stent. Apparently the bladder rises a little in the stomach when it's getting full and comes down again when emptying. This causes a little friction with the stent but it is not painful at all. Sleeping with my stent is better than ever before. I usually don't wake up until early in the morning when my bladder decides to contract, causing severe urination. I then have to quickly turn on my back because the front of the diaper is already completely wet. I usually have to change the diaper then, otherwise it is difficult to fall asleep again. Highly motivated by Reddy's story, I pretend that my incontinence is not caused by a stent, but is the permanent result of a surgery. I know I'm kidding myself, but it nevertheless sheds new light on the mental aspect of dealing with incontinence. This is how I hope to find out whether irreversible incontinence is something I want.

Yes i do

Wow. This is a very powerful chapter and so well-written. Great work!

Mistake Twelve Sure enough, Judith kept her word. We destroyed her underwear, and the defeat in her eyes was matched only by the bliss of her orgasm moments before. It was everything I wanted it to be. Over the next two weeks, I got her to use two more of her Get Out Of Horny-Jail Free cards. The first one was an accident: she was feeling a little under the weather, and I went into nurse mode. She asked for it because she said it was the only thing that would make her happy. As it turned out, she'd forgotten to take her antidepressants two days in a row. I switched to a more proactive strategy, forcing her every morning to take her "good girl pill", which would help her obey me. They were still the same meds, but the roleplay engaged her. The second time was on purpose: I told her that I was going to masturbate like a grown up. She was welcome to watch, but she didn't have permission to touch herself. In the end, she wound up on top of Papa and falling asleep on top of him in her wet and cummy diaper. But there was one thing that kept eluding me. If I wanted her in diapers full time, without needing to use the bathroom, then she needed to mess herself. The only way I could convince her to do that was to have my time with her overlap with her need to poop. Unfortunately, she was obnoxiously regular. Once every two days, near bedtime. She never even asked for permission or tried to sneak away. I tried a few different foods to make things less predictable, but she would just wait until I left. I gave her a laxative once, but it took so long for it to work that I was already gone. My "shifts" with her were only six to eight hours a day, and I couldn't make that timetable work in my favor. We had a strong laxative at the Academy, but it was most effective with pink food. And pink food had other side effects. It would make her dumb and docile, and wet herself uncontrollably. It would make her mind mushy and malleable, easy to control. And when it was over, she'd remember everything. It was the last part that was the problem. Pink food worked great for other Candies, but I couldn't put Judith through all that and still keep her trust in me. I practiced with some suppositories, to see how likely it was that I could get it in her ass without her feeling it. The results were very conclusive. Even if I slid one in before testing her temperature with a rectal thermometer, the suppository left a slight feeling of fullness deep in the body. That feeling went away after a while, but not long enough to keep a thermometer in her butt. And anyway, maybe that was too suspicious. In the end, there were only two answers I could come up with. The first was to use the marker. The second was to wait. And I was never a very patient woman. "I think I'm getting this diapering thing down," Judith said, almost proudly, when I entered the foyer of the beach house. It was so cute watching an adult woman express pride in taping on her own diapers. "Lemme see," I said with a smile. "Uh..." Judith didn't think that far ahead. She looked down at her jeans and pouted. "Well?" I asked. "Yeah, yeah, fine..." Judith unbuttoned her own jeans and slid them down just a little. The tapes were in remarkably good spots, and it looked secure. Notably, she was also dry. Our "wet yourself" introductions had become more spontaneous than routine; that game had served its purpose. "Hm... not bad... but..." "But?" "But I think it's a little lopsided. Let Nana change you into a fresh one." A diaper change was the perfect time to put my plan in motion. "It's fine," Judith pouted. "I'm not even wet." "Maybe you're just getting so used to diapers that you can't tell if you're wet?" I winked at her. A little casual gaslighting between friends. Then I took her by the hand and led her into her room. "I still don't think this is necessary," Judith groaned, but she let me lay her down on the bed all the same. It was so routine. Even though I wasn't diapering her on my arrival anymore, she almost always needed a change before I left. Every time she asked to use the bathroom, I would shut her down. So she would wet herself on my command. Today would be similar. She would have to ask to use the bathroom, and I would shut her down. I knew it would be a little trickier when it came to pooping her pants, but I had faith in my persuasiveness. I balled up the unused diaper and threw it in the diaper pail we kept in her room. It was a must-have purchase after she gave up all her panties. Then I unfolded a new diaper and slid it under her butt, holding her ankles with one hand like I always did. I tapped Judith three times on her inner thigh, then pulled the marker out of my pocket. I took off the cap and touched it to Judith's skin. I watched her look of embarrassed boredom fall away, and her eyes drooped a little. Her mouth became expressionless. I reached into the other pocket and grabbed the suppository. One should do the trick. The marker was a powerful tool. If I had wanted to, I could have taken away the feeling of needing to poop. It would come on suddenly and always surprise her. Or I could bond the sensation of pooping to arousal, so that each time she did she would cum. But those options were too disparate from Judith's reality. I'd established a baseline at the beach house, and altering it too drastically was dangerous. Regardless, I didn't need all the bells and whistles Kenzō designed. Judith was already wrapped around my finger. All I needed to do was encourage her to use the bathroom a little, and the rest would fall down like dominos. I unwrapped the little suppository and took out a small tube of lubricant from my pocket. I oiled up my finger and lined the suppository up with Judith's rear end. Slowly, gently, I pushed it inside, my finger sliding in after it. Judith didn't so much as make a peep. I checked my watch. I had to wait a good ten minutes before the sensation of the suppository started to fade away; I'd been testing them all week. In the meantime, I wasn't allowed to tidy anything. Anything out of place, and Judith might notice. So I stood in one spot for the longest ten minutes of my life. After ten minutes passed - eleven, just to be sure - I tapped Judith's thigh three more times and she blinked her eyes open. I continued to diaper her as if nothing had happened. I generously powdered her and pulled the thick padding up between her legs. As I taped each tape, I waited with bated breath for Judith to say something out of the ordinary. That her stomach felt weird, or that her butt was tingling. But she didn't. When I looked up at her, she was looking up at the ceiling. And when she did say something, it was just: "I think you're just doing this because you like diapering me, and not because I actually needed a new one." Thank goodness for the conversation starter, because it helped bring me back into "her" version of events, and not have to focus on pretending like I didn't just spend the past ten minutes outside of her chronology. "Oh, is that what you think? Why is that?" "Because I did a good job!" she said, filled with annoyance. But that annoyance came from pride. Pride at doing a good job diapering herself. So I smiled and told a lie, like I did so many other times. "You're right. I just wanted to change you. You did a great job." "You coulda just asked," Judith said. "I'll keep that in mind. But who knows, maybe soon you won't even notice what's happening in your diaper." Judith rolled her eyes, but she blushed a little. I could tell that what I said had stirred up some uncertainty. Was she really on her way to not caring if she wet herself? It had become so much easier the past few weeks alone. "C'mon. We can watch that movie you wanted to show me." I helped her off the bed and led the way out of the room. "My pants!" she argued. "You only keep your pants if I don't need to change you again, remember?" I teased. "But you said yourself that you changed me for no reason!" "But I did change you. Soooo..." "Ughhhh... fine..." Judith huffed and pouted, but she was used to not wearing pants. A diaper and a t-shirt had been most of her wardrobe lately. She was lucky I didn't put her in more childish clothes. As we made our way to the living room together, I did my best not to look at her as though she were a living time bomb, and thought about how best to leverage the experience. I could have her sit on the floor, playing with her hair when it happened. Or I could have her head in my lap? "I want you to sit on my lap," I said. "Uh, alright. That won't be too uncomfortable for you?" There were a lot of downsides to Judith being a fully grown adult. One of them was that sitting on my lap for too long wasn't comfortable for either of us. "If I get uncomfortable, you can move," I shrugged. "Let me get you a sippy cup first though." Judith sat on my lap and I gently rubbed her back. She finished her sippy cup ten minutes into the movie and I got up to refill it. "You're missing it!" Judith said, scrambling for the remote. "What's so special about this movie anyway?" I asked, halfway to the kitchen, unscrewing the lid on her cup. "It's one of my favorites. I watched it a lot when I was a kid." "Well, if it's important to you, then it's important to me." Which meant I'd have to actually watch the damn thing. I returned to the couch and passed her the sippy cup. She didn't get back on my lap, but she curled up at my side. Okay, so the movie was called Oliver and Company, which was about a cat that joined a dog family or something. It really wasn't that interesting. I never really liked kids movies. "Uhh..." Judith sat up a little, wincing. "You okay, princess?" "Yeah... fine. Um. Keep watching, my favorite part is coming up." There was no way we were making it through this movie. But I pressed play anyway. The cat wound up adopted by a little rich girl. I wondered if Penny had seen the movie; I always thought that when I watched a kid’s movie. The rich girl made a huge mess in the kitchen, and I knew Penny would absolutely adore her. Maybe when this was all over, we could have another movie night with Eli and ———. Thinking of Penny watching the movie made me smile. And that made me think of Judith. I was waiting for her to feel sick and humiliate herself in front of me, but she was actually showing me something important to her. So I decided to buckle in and take it seriously. "This here," Judith said brightly. "This is my favorite song." The little rich girl was playing a song on piano. It was about always being together, her and the cat. We'll always be good company, you and me. I looked at Judith out of the corner of my eye. I thought she'd be happy to hear her favorite song, but she just looked... sad. "That was cute," I told her, when the song was over. "Uhhuh." Judith smiled a fake smile and winced again. "You okay?" I asked. "Yeah, yeah. No. I'm okay." She turned her attention back to the movie. I was right about not making it through the movie. It wasn't even five minutes later when Judith got to her feet. "Where ya going?" I asked. "I can get you more water if you need it." "No, um. I just need to use the bathroom..." "You're already wearing your diaper, sweetheart." I watched her with a little smile on my face. "I... I know that," she muttered, crossing her arms over her stomach, a little lower than her usual pout. She winced again and let out a sharp breath. "So sit back down and let's finish the movie." "No, I... I need to use the bathroom. Like... it's... an emergency..." "Oh no, baby girl, what's the emergency?" I stood up and wrapped my arms around her. Judith whimpered and squirmed out of my hug and I tilted my head curiously. Her eyebrows pulled together as another cramp coursed through her stomach. "I just... need to. I need the bathroom. Not for... diaper things. I'm just gonna..." She stepped around the couch and headed for the bathroom. I didn't even chase after her. "Judith," I said sharply. She froze in place. "Come here." She gave me a pleading look. Then, painstakingly, she walked around the couch. "What's going on?" I asked firmly. "I... gotta use the bathroom..." Judith blushed. "I gotta... number two..." Wow, this conversation really made her uncomfortable. Probably because it's not a conversation you usually have with a partner. It ruins the sex appeal to know that a woman poops. Well, for most people I guess. "Okay? And do you think that the woman you're involved with, that likes when you're helpless and diapered, is going to have a problem with that?" "I have a problem with that!" she said loudly, like the thought hadn't even crossed her mind. "No way, absolutely no way!" "Judith. You're making a fuss over nothing." "If it's nothing, then let me use the bathroom!" she shouted. Then another cramp hit and she whimpered a little. "You tell me three reasons why you shouldn't be using your diaper, and I'll consider it." "You have got to be fucking kidding me." Wow. Alright. I didn't see that coming. In all the months I'd known her, I think I had only heard her say fuck once before. "Wow. I thought better of you." I crossed my arms. Judith stared at me for a second, full of anger and... something else. Disappointment, maybe? Then she turned on her heel and walked away. "Judith," I said sharply, but she didn't stop. She just walked into the other room and I heard the door slam. What was I supposed to do? There was no point in Touching her again, not now. Her body and her mind were different things, and I could only control one of them. I'd have to use another Touch if I wanted to try this suppository trick again, but maybe that was a bad idea... No, the best thing I could do was damage mitigation. The best thing I could do was to prioritize our rapport. "Judith?" I waited a moment or two and followed her to the bathroom, but I stayed outside the door. I didn't have to give her privacy, but it wouldn't hurt to extend a little trust her way. I should have just been more aggressive with the marker. I shouldn't have left it to chance or agency. "Go away," she said through the bathroom door. She was definitely angry, but she sounded tired too. "I just want to talk, princess. Is that okay? I'm your Nurse before anything else, and I want to take care of my patient." "I don't want to talk. Please go away." I stood there for a moment. I didn't want to go away. I wanted to fix things. But part of any war is patience. If I barged into the bathroom now, it would only make things worse. But how was I supposed to make things better? I took a deep breath and shook my head. No, if she needed space she needed space. "Okay... I'll be out here if you need anything." "No," she said sharply through the door. "Leave." Like, the house? Was that really what she wanted? Or was she angry and overreacting? Then again, maybe letting her have her way, letting her tantrum play out, meant she would be more cautious in the future. Maybe I should just go. "Alright baby girl, I'll see you tomorrow then." I waited a few moments to hear if she'd argue, but it didn't seem like she would. So I just left. I watched her camera for a long time. She came out of the bathroom, checked the living room, and went right to bed. Oliver and Company was still on the TV. She ignored me. She told me to leave. I thought I had control over her, that I could make her do anything I wanted. But at the end of the day, I was hardly a voice in her choir. How the fuck was anyone supposed to obey us? Even if we found the Star or the Chariot, how could we trust them? Was this whole plan doomed from the start? I barely slept. I didn't know what to do about Judith. Everything was wrong. Everything I thought was wrong. I could Touch her again, but the suppository was my sixth. Seventh, since technically all Candies are Touched when they arrive. I only had three more, if that. I was so sure that I wouldn't need this fucking marker at all, and now look. Fuck fuck fuck. I could start her over, like Ai. She would forget everything. I could do better the second time around. But that thought made me sick to my stomach. I hated losing. The next day, I went to visit Judith. I hesitated at the door. I didn't have a plan. I needed to assess the situation before I could do anything else. I stepped into the beach house and Judith was at the kitchen island. She looked up at me, but she didn't come running to her usual spot. I faked a smile. "Good morning." "Hey," she said. "Are you feeling any better?" I asked. She shrugged. I hated this. I hated being at the disadvantage. I hated that she was mad at me and I had to dig my own way out of it. "Did you want to talk about it?" I asked. "No, not really," Judith said. I sighed. Maybe this was wrong. Maybe I should just go back to basics. So I set down my bag and put on my best stern voice. "Come here." Judith looked over at me. She hesitated, but she got up. She walked over to me with her arms crossed. Okay, so it was working! But then I noticed Judith's jeans. I'd grown intimately familiar with those jeans, with how many times I'd washed them. I knew what they looked like on her body, and what they looked like over a diaper. And they certainly weren't over a diaper. "You aren't wearing a diaper?" I asked, more confused than angry. "No, I'm not," Judith sighed. "I'm not in the mood." "The... mood?" I was floored. It wasn't a mood thing. Obedience wasn't about moods. She wore them because I told her to, because we had a deal! "I see." I did my best to contain my frustration and bewilderment. "I suppose our deal is off, then?" I shouldn't have picked at the wound, but I was only human. "Yeah, I guess..." Judith looked down at her feet. Neither of us had anything to say for a minute. It felt like we were breaking up, and we weren't even together. She wasn't allowed to do this. Why was this happening? "If what you want is for us to return to a strictly professional relationship, Judith, that's fine with me. But maybe it would be best if I assign you to another Nurse in that case." The threat was a nuclear solution, to be honest, but I was at a loss. "It does seem like such a waste to throw away what we have over something so stupid, though," I added. "It isn't stupid," she said. She spoke plainly and clearly, like she was reading it out of a book. "It hurt. You hurt me. And... I didn't think you would do that. So... fine. Assign me someone else." Judith turned and walked away. I stood there for a moment, dumbfounded. Then I grabbed my bag and walked out of Judith's beach house, and into the quiet, lonely halls of Academy M.

So you might ask (and well you should) what does little Cwithy think of having her poopy diapered bottom placed on a profane altar to have her poopy diaper changed. I suspect she is not a fan. Not that she has a say in the manner. Sworn and Beholden. Plus her mommy is really strong! (side note, those arrows suggest at least one other member of their party... not been able to figure out who that is)

As you can see from their rules I posted above, trans people aren't welcome in this subreddit. This rule was added and then reaffirmed by rather dubious polls. I'm really quite disappointed in this as it's one of the most prominent abdl subreddits and given the number of trans folks in the community I'd have hoped for more inclusivity.

Uhhuh! I don't think every mistake has a lesson tied up in it, but I do think each "mistake" is a chance for growth and learning. I think that Maria is saying these things are "mistakes" is also really important. Like, maybe she can grow too?? That's my thoughts anyway.

There is a whole industry using oil and coal called "petrochemicals" for plastics, medicines etc Also, you can get natural rubber. The alternatives generate far more of the dreaded "greenhouse gases" which are not even a real issue in global climate anyway; they come in a distan third and CO2 is a minor issue. Water vapor is about 1.5 times as strong a greenouse gas and, on average, 10 times more present in the atmosphere. This is just another leftist scam to get more power over persons' lives. we can do absolutely zip about the two major climate controllers which are cyclical in nature and ditto 95% of the CO2 entering the atmosphere as most of it comes from undersea volcanoes and vulcanism is the second most powerful climate controller as to the first, google up "little ice age" and "maunder minimum". And when you get to the point that you are trying to control cow farts becuase of the methane, you have definitely reached the cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs mark on the looney toones graph: Th-th-th-that's all; folks I am getting tired of Protex's antics

I was in the active and reserve of the United States Air Force.

@~Brian~ Homophobia. They are afraid they might be attracted to a "man."

Chapter 50 “You can still change your mind,” Amanda said. Jamie was sitting across from her, purposefully trying to see less little. He even asked Becky to buy him a button down shirt, something he avoided wearing prior to coming to the dimension, but he wanted to be taken seriously. This was his chance to speak up for unregressed littles. “No, I want to,” he said. Not that he wasn’t nervous. “Your pants clean?” “Keep your voice down,” he hissed, “Yes.” “Just thought you’d feel more confident. Class is about ready to start. You ready to go meet Professor Stern?” He took a deep breath and said, “Sure” on the exhale. Amanda moved to picked him up, but he avoided her hands and slid off the chair and on to the floor. “I’d like to walk in.” Amanda shrugged and led him down the hall toward the classroom, staying near enough to help him dodge the bigs walking toward and around him if need be. It wasn’t a busy hallway, but everything hallway seems busy when its occupants toward over you. Amanda held the heavy classroom door open for him. About 15 students were in the classroom. “Dr. Stern,” Amanda said as she put her hand on Jamie’s shoulder, “this is Jamie. Excuse me, James.” Jamie put his hand out, and the professor knelt down and took it. “James. I’m glad you could come,” he said. “Me, too. Thank you for having me.” “I’ll introduce you in a minute, and then you can just take questions. How does that sound?” “Fine. Thank you.” Three chairs were in the front of the room facing in, and Jamie assumed one was for him. Trying to look like Douglas Fairbanks, he did his best to artfully yet manfully vault himself into the middle one. Amanda took the seat next to him. She couldn’t help but smile; she was proud of him and glad to show him off. She’d respected his privacy all semester, but when she spoke up in class, she often used him as an anonymous example. When the last student came in and was seated, Dr. Stern began his introduction. “So with just two more classes to go before finals, I wanted to use this one for a very rare opportunity. We have here James, an unregressed human. James came here at the beginning of last summer and is Amanda’s little brother. He’s here to take questions from us. Let me be the first to thank James for coming today.” The student politely applauded. “So, who has the first question for James?” Everyone in the room hesitated for a moment. Jamie felt more nervous. He’d spoken in public before, but now he felt on the spot, quietly literally a specimen being examined. “Michelle,” the professor said to the first student to raise her hand. “Hi, Jamie,” she squeaked. “I’m so glad you could come to our classroom today. Do you like it here?” Amanda tried to hide a smirk. She’d anticipated someone might forget, within seconds, or otherwise not care, that Jamie was unregressed. Jamie was gracious in his response nonetheless, at least in tone, saying with a smile, “Thank you, Michelle. If you don’t mind, I’d appreciate it if you would address me as James. Only my friends and family call me Jamie.” He paused to see how the group responded. About half the students looked bored. Most of the rest sat up straighter having figured out this was not an ordinary conversation with a little. “And,” Jamie added, “I’d like to begin your question with a question of my own: why are you talking to me like that?” “Like what,” Michelle asked, patiently confused. “Like I’m an infant.” “Oh, well …” “You’re still doing it. I’m not trying to embarrass you.” “This is how almost everyone talks to littles.” “Regressed littles. I have an adult mind. Like yours.” “I, um … sorry. I guess it’s just something I don’t think about,” she said, sounding genuinely apologetic and speaking in a normal tone. “I understand that,’ Jamie said. “Do you want to try asking your question again?” “Um, sure. What do you think of Itali?” “Overall, I like it. It’s taken a lot of getting used to.” “What’s taken the most getting used to,” another student interjected “It’s frustrating a lot of times, interacting with bigs who don’t see humans as fully-fledged people, or who try to treat me like I’m toddler who feelings and opinions can be ignored. If I weren’t a patient and forgiving person, I’d probably have had even more trouble remaining calm about it.” “Can you give us an example?” “A big picked me up one time without asking and ignored me when I told her to put me down … No, not ignored me. More like didn’t hear me.” “What happened?” “Amanda told her to put me down, and then she did.” “Then what happened?” “We ignored her back,” Amanda said with a shrug. A young man in the back raised his hand. “Justin,” Dr. Stern said. “Do you feel like that’s teaching him to be disrespectful of us as bigs?” Amanda and Jamie looked at each other for a moment. Either Justin was speaking in the third person or was bypassing Jamie. “For what reasons are bigs due respect from littles,” Jamie asked calmly, “and why should that respect extend to letting others touch us without permission?” The boy shrugged. “Littles are immature. They’re not as smart. They could hurt themselves. Bigs provide for littles.” “I’m not immature,” Jamie said. “I’m a decade older than you. I’ve had a career, a hard one in which I helped others deal with things you’ve only seen on the news, and I was good at it. I’ve never hurt myself for want of a big to control me. And as for bigs providing for littles, that’s what bigs sign up for when they adopt a little. Perhaps that means a big is due appreciation, but let me ask you this: why should it mean automatic deference?” “Um …” “It’s not because you’re always right,” Jamie answered, “And I’d like to think it’s because bigs are big and littles are small.” “But it’s like adults and kids,” the boy said. “For regressed littles, maybe. I’m not regressed. So why should I respect a person who puts their hands on me or demeans me? You wouldn’t think that if I were an independent little, would you?” “No.” “So, then why?” “Because you’re not independent.” “Still the same mind. And my status as a dependent is between myself, Amanda and our mother. It has nothing to do with any random big I encounter elsewhere.” “Well, it’s just the way things are … that’s how they work here.” Jamie’s eyes betrayed his sanguine expression. “In Aidu they mutilate littles if they don’t want them to walk or if they want one with different genitals or want to add aesthetic features to them. That’s how things work there. So fuck how things work.” “That’s Aidu.” “That’s your species,” Jamie said with a shrug. “Pretty much takes away any general claim of bigs’ superiority to humans, doesn’t it. Anyone else have any questions?” Jamie called on a woman in the back. “So if you didn’t want to be regressed, why did you come here?” A question Jamie had been grappling with for over a year. “A new start … a chance at a better life … a chance to be happier than I could be there.” “Did it work? Are you, happier?” “I’m working on it.” “What would you change, if you could,” another student asked. “There are no public accommodations for littles. I wasn’t allowed to see the art at the museum because they don’t allow littles to walk around. A restaurant insisted we sit in a separate section.” “Littles can get pretty rambunctious.” “I don’t. I guess if I could change one thing, it would be for people to stop seeing us as a homogenous group and start seeing us as individuals. I just want to be treated like James.” “Does he misbehave a lot,” a student asked. “No. I do not misbehave. Do you?” “Bigs can’t misbehave.” “Really? You never do something stupid that you shouldn’t have done?” “What’s your favorite part about being here,” another student asked. Jamie’s eyes turned toward Amanda, and he smiled. “Probably the same as yours. My people.” A man in the back raised his hand. “When you think about yourself before you came here, do you think of yourself as being a little back then, too?” “No. Not at all.” “What’s the difference?” “I was a human there, and I’m a human here. I led a life pretty much like the life of an adult here. I went to work, I ran errands, I paid bills, I tried to forge connections and relationships, and it was hard like it is for everyone. Adulting is hard.” “So what’s the difference then between an adult and an adult who’s a little, according to you?” “I guess … here I don’t have to hold anything in. I get to be honest here. I get to experience all my feelings here. I don’t have to hide anything. I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not. I don’t have to compartmentalize myself into who I am and who I am work and who I am with friends; I just get to be me all the time. And I don’t have to do it all alone. I mean, really not alone. Not just having someone to listen to your complaints, but having people who’ll carry you when you need it, take the burden, really share it all with you. And the good things, too. I get to love with everything I have to give, and I get loved with everything my people have to give. So, if you ask me, a little isn’t a species. It’s a way of being. And it’s better.” “Is it worth it? The things you gave up?” “I got a lot more than I gave up,” Jamie answered. He looked at Amanda. “A lot more. Worth it every day.” ______________________________________________ “Did you enjoy that,” Amanda asked when they were seated in their booth at their favorite TexMex restaurant. “Yeah. It was fun … Justin’s a dick.” “Yeah. But even if you didn’t get through to him you probably did a few other people.” “Dr. Stern’s a nice guy.” “Yeah. He has more experience with more littles than even most people in his field.” “You think any more about changing your major?” “Some. I’m leaning towards it.” “You gotta admit, we’re a lot more interesting that kids.” “You definitely are. What do you want to do when we get home?” “Do you have to study for finals?” “I can do that after you go to bed.” “After we take a nap, will you help me build something with my blocks?” “I’d be happy to.” ______________________________________________ “This is silly,” Jamie said as they waited in line. “Mom will like it.” “And I want a picture, too,” Mel said. “And it’s your holiday,” Amanda reminded him. “And your deity,” Mel added. “Santa is not … after this I’m going to explain Christmas to you guys.” “Next,” said the elf. Amanda carried Jamie up to Giant Santa Claus, who held out his giant, white-gloved hands. “Well, hello there,” he boomed like The Ghost of Christmas Present. “And what’s your name?” “Jamie.” It was still silly, but it was fun, too. Just the ridiculousness of sitting on a giant Santa’s lap. He wasn’t sure he’d ever gotten to do that as a kid. “Have you been a good little boy this year?” “I think so,” he giggled when Santa poked his belly. “Well, I’ll check my list just in case, but I’m sure you have been, so what can I bring you for Christmas?” Jamie shrugged. “I don’t want anything.” “You must want something.” “Give my toy to someone who doesn’t have any.” “Well,” Santa said, a little less jolly but much more happy, “I think I can do that. Now, can you make a big smile at the camera?” He did, and the elf took the picture. “And one more with all three of us,” Amanda asked. “I’d never say no to kids at Christmas time!” Amanda and Mel knelt on either side of Santa, and the three of them got their picture taken. “What do you say to Santa, Jamie,” Amanda asked as she picked him back up. “Thank you, Santa. Fly safe.” “You’re welcome,” Santa boomed, “and thank you, too!” Once Amanda had paid for their photos, which were just as overpriced in Itali, they headed toward lunch, where Jamie was going to set them straight about Santa. Not that he didn’t see how the misunderstanding could happen. “Did you pee while you were on Santa’s lap,” Amanda ask as she patted Jamie’s soggy butt. “It’s tradition,” Jamie replied with a straight face.