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    • She poops herself on the street and feels the need to play with her shit inside her pants
    • Chapter 34: Miss Sparkles Elysium – LittleFallenPrincess -------------------------------       “Wait… so I get hormones…?” I asked Ceres, once the ‘board’ were out of the room, leaving just me and my Nanny alone together. Of course I had replied to them with ‘as soon as possible!’, to which they smiled and nodded, then walked out. “Don’t trans people have to wait years just for a first appointment?” “Sweetie, stop talking about yourself as if you’re not one of them. You can accept it now.” “I… oh… yeah… I’m still doing that, aren’t I?” “But yes, from what I know, and from what I’ve been reading up on over the past week since the incident… you’d normally have to be on a waiting list for years. Oh god… the horror stories I’ve read about the whole process whilst researching… well I guess there’s another upside to being kidnapped by some cute Scottish girl working for some shady organisation…” she replied, smiling at me, her cheeks turning red. “Honestly even if it’s just for this… worth it. But then I also got my own cute Scottish Nanny out of it…” “I still can’t believe I only have one baby to care for from now on! I think it’s only fair that I lend the other Nannies a hand here and there though, seeing as I won’t have my hands full all the time.” “Yeah that makes sense. Plus I know the secret behind this place now, so I guess you don’t have to be super strict or anything with how you look after me.” “Sweetie, you are here to get better. You’re still my top priority. I’m not letting my quality of care suffer just because you know how screwed up this place is and know some of its biggest secrets.” “So… when do I get hormones?” I asked. “We’ll do some blood tests today. I think Joy will want to speak to an endocrinologist for a specialist's opinion on how to go about doing all this, and then hopefully… within the week?” “That’s amazing!” “Let me just…” Ceres pulled out her tablet to check something, and she looked… surprised? “Oh… that’s good…” “What is?” “I… look, I know it’s still early days. And I think Joy will want you to go through lots of therapy before then… but it appears they’ve approved funding for… surgery?” “Wait… what?” “If you want it, of course. There’s a note attached. I’m to ask if that’s something you’ve ever considered?” “Which surgery? FFS or bottom surgery?” Yes… despite having doubts about even being trans… I have done my research. And I was sure that if I ever did get the courage to come out and transition… I’d get both, assuming I could afford it or wait that long on the NHS… “Just says… ‘surgeries’. Wait… bottom surgery is kind of obvious, but what’s FFS?” Ceres asked, confused. I forgot, Joy probably knows a little about trans people’s healthcare, but does Ceres even know another trans person or what they… we… have to go through? “Facial feminisation surgery. They alter specific parts of your face to make it look more feminine. Hormones do a lot already… but sometimes you want or need that extra bit of work…” “Well I think you already look hella feminine. But is this FFS something you’d want? I’m sure they’d fund it if you requested it.” “I… Maybe?” “Well I’ll put in a request for it. You can always change your mind later on. I assume that is something Joy wouldn’t mind you having done before the end of your stay here. I think they plan for what you call ‘bottom surgery’ towards the end of the third year maybe.” “Something to look forward to I guess… or it gives me time to change my mind if I decide it’s not something I want… honestly I never thought I’d ever be at this stage of coming out, let alone talking about surgery options!” “I think they’d give you these options even if they didn’t feel really guilty about putting you on the wrong side for a year.” “They didn’t do that. I just… didn’t tell them…” I mumbled. “I know, baby. But it’s okay. Right. Well Joy is going to come over soon to visit you, have a word with you about everything.” “And I can apologise to her…” “Sweetie… You don’t need to, but I’d like to think I know you enough by now. And if that makes you feel less guilty, go for it. After that, I know a few of the girls have been asking to see you as soon as you wake up. Especially Ella…” “Can… Can I have visitors today?” “I’ll let a few see you today, but we’ll space the rest out over the week, just so you can keep recovering. That fair?” I nodded and smiled back at Ceres. “Th… thank you for this.” “For what?” she asked, confused. “For being so supportive. And lovely. And sweet. And…” Ceres bent over and kissed me on the cheek, cutting me off before I continued. “Sweetpea? You’re a precious little angel and I promise you then and I will promise you again… I will keep you safe and I will do everything in my power to make you happy. And now I can see the wonderful little girl in you… I know how to do that. You’re going to be my little princess. Seriously, I can’t wait to start dressing you up and showing you off!”   Ceres didn’t leave me for long, I think she was feeling a little overprotective of me after everything that had gone on, so she barely left my side the whole week, let alone day. At first, Joy came to visit. “So… Rosie, is it?” she asked, raising her eyebrows, holding her little notepad in one hand and her pen in the other, just like she does in our usual sessions. Though this time… I had Ceres with me. Like I said… she refused to leave my side other than to go call people in. I must say… I know it’s such a silly little normal thing… but the fact that this organisation has tablets and hypnosis and tech so advanced it wouldn’t be amiss in some fictional sci-fi story… Yet Joy still opts for using her pen and paper rather than her tablet… just always makes me smile. And it’s not like she’s bad at typing either. She’s as fast as I am at it! But I managed to ask her about it half a dozen sessions in… asking why she uses it. Her response? ‘I like it. Plus my handwriting is barely legible… and whilst I trust Elysium… if anything did manage to get out or someone untrustworthy got in… they wouldn’t be able to read my notes. Sure, I give basic summaries to the board, but anything too sensitive? I speak with them directly about it, with the only paper trail being in my notes.’ Made me feel a bit better about opening up to her about everything honestly, knowing that she’d keep some stuff private, even keeping it secret from the shady organisation she’s part of. But now… it felt like I was under the microscope, and the tapping pen on her notepad didn’t fill me with the same comfort it used to. “I… umm… sorry…” I blurted out. “Whatever for?” she asked. “Deceiving you…” “Hun. You didn’t deceive me. Honestly… if anything you were deceiving yourself. I tried getting you to open up, thinking that gender dysphoria may be one of the things bothering you…” “You did?” “You didn’t notice? But then you managed to evade that so well… too well…” “...Sorry.” “No, that’s on me for dismissing it. I had a feeling you weren’t a typical boy. Hence why I assumed gender dysphoria early on, though I never shared that with anyone here. But you’ve been hiding it for a while now, haven’t you? You’re a pro at doing so, you might say…” “...Yeah…” “Rosie. It’s fine. Seriously. I’m just happy you opened up finally. I hate that it took all this stuff with Jack to allow you to accept it all… but I’m glad you’re finally accepting that part of yourself. Now… I’m going to take some blood, I’m going to ask you a bit about your past feelings regarding your dysphoria… and then we’re going to discuss surgery options and what you hope to achieve from your transition. You’re very fortunate that you’ll be able to get whatever you want here. Before I get started, I just want to confirm… you want to start hormone replacement therapy, correct?” “Yeah…” I said, nervously. It was one thing wanting it. It was another thing admitting to it. I thought once I had come out everything would be easier to talk about… turns out it’s not. “Then yes, we’ll take some bloods now, then we’re going to have a long chat…” So the long chat went on for a lot longer than I was expecting, and I was already feeling tired. I went back into my past, talking about my feelings of dysphoria, when they started, all the stuff you’d expect a therapist to talk about. But without any of those disgusting questions that the NHS asks trans people, ones like ‘when did you start masturbating?’ and ‘what do you think when you masturbate?’ and ‘were you abused as a child?’ Honestly… it’s things like that that made me not want to start the whole gender clinic process. But Joy was very respectful, and we went into great detail. And in the end… I’m more sure than I ever was that I did the right thing and that I’m doing the right thing. I’m to start on HRT by the end of the week, I’m not going to get FFS as apparently I already have ‘a very feminine frame’, and I’ve told them I’m interested in bottom surgery. Normally I’d ask for laser hair removal too… but they already did that to us all at the start of the first year, it just means I won’t have the reverse procedure like the guys will to allow them to grow facial hair again.   “You’re used to having daily naps, sweetpea…” Ceres said, now that it was just the two of us again. “Ah. Yeah. Forgot about that,” I replied, yawning again slightly. “Well it’s naptime for everyone else, so I doubt you’ll get any visitors. How about you rest your head for a bit, then I’ll get Ella to come see you? I think she’s been the one begging the most to come see you. Especially as she’s the only one who knows your secret. The others have theories, and they all pretty much figured out you’re trans… but Ella won’t confirm it. She’s a good friend.” “She really is. Okay then. I’ll… I’ll have a nap…” I said, yawning a little more, as Ceres brought a stuffie over to me, one I hadn’t seen before. “This, little Rosie, is Miss Sparkles,” she said. “Miss… Sparkles?” She was a pink kitty stuffie with sparkly ears and paws. But she also looked well loved… unlike the other stuffies here. All the stuffies we were allowed to play with and snuggle with at night were all brand new. We even got to pick out our own once, where I picked out a cute fox that looked really snuggly. And whenever a stuffie got too ragged from use, it got replaced by a brand new one. This one though… This was well loved and old. “Miss Sparkles was my stuffie.” “Huh?” “When I was a little girl. Not like you now… I never went through this treatment after all… but an actual little girl. Me Gran got her for me a couple years before she passed. I… I want you to take care of her.” “Ceres… I can’t… she’s worth too much to you.” “And you are worth a lot to me. Rosie, you’re not like my other charges. I was with those for three years. They are two of my closest friends now. But you… something about you makes me want to protect you more than anything. You’re special, you know that? So before you say no, I’m trusting you with Miss Sparkles. You keep her safe, and she’ll keep you safe when I can’t do so. She’ll keep your bad thoughts and bad dreams away, and she’ll be a constant reminder that you’re important to someone… me.” “I… don’t know what to say…” “You don’t have to say anything. You just snuggle up with her, get some sleep, and I’ll let Ella see you today. The others will have to be spread over the next week though.” “What… What about Ollie?” “What about him, sweetie?” “Has he been worried about me too? Does he want to see me?” “Ollie hasn’t really said much since the incident. I’ll ask whoever is taking care of him today.” “Oh yeah… he won’t have you if you’re here all the time.” “Yes, baby. He’s been with most of the boys’ Nannies, including some of the third year ones, whilst I’ve been in here. Though after today, he’ll have Diana from now on as a permanent Nanny. Which I think he’ll be okay with. He never really got on super well with me anyway. It was you he bonded with the most.” “I hope he’s okay.” “I’ll check in on him for you, sweetie. You just get some rest and I’ll be back in a bit, okay babygirl?” I smiled back at Ceres, who waved at me, then blew me a little kiss as she left the room, leaving me alone again. And as I snuggled up on my side, snuggling with Miss Sparkles in my arms… I thought to myself… ‘I should find it weird… but being called ‘babygirl’ felt really good…’           ====================================================== So glad a bunch of you got the link to my previous story, the LETO syndicate! And I'm so happy you all enjoyed the big twist. This one has been one I've been extremely excited to post, so to see you all like it makes me extremely happy. But that doesn't mean the fun is over, just because we've had a big reveal. There are still like 30 chapters left, we're only half way there!       Don't forget I'm on Subscribestar! Subscribers get 2 weeks early access to chapters, and exclusive short stories (Nessa's Tale is currently the only available one). The next four chapters of my new story posted on my Subscribestar! ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my subscribers for their support over the past few years! Seriously, your support means the world to me. New chapters of my latest story every Wednesday/Sunday!Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post. And it goes without saying, my story is not to be used in any way to create AI work. Thanks! 
    • This morning before I got out of bed. I still haven’t change my diaper yet and I don’t plan to anything soon. 
    • Sounds like Mercy likes being mommy and daddy's baby girl. Can't wait to see more.
    • My wife is out of town, she knows all about my diapers, but in her absence I took two Senicot pills and oh my goodness is my Sunkiss Masterpiece diaper full, messy, wet, squishy, wow!
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