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Bettypooh

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Bettypooh last won the day on May 13 2018

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About Bettypooh

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  • Birthday 08/18/1958

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    60

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  1. ALL people who do not fit into society's norms should at least understand what that is like and extend whatever courtesies they think appropriate for them and their kind to the other different ones who are not in the social norms either. To do any less is to be a hypocrite which is universally held to be a bad thing It's equally hypocritical to act as if you're accepting or supporting someone just for appearances sake, only to abandon them when you feel that profits you better Nobody should get what they themselves aren't willing to freely give to others. As to Pride events, their original concept has become blurred and in many places commercialized too Part of the problem is that there was never a set of rules or limits defined on how they should be done- only suggestions given allowing local organizers who may have other agendas to do what they please under the "Pride" banner. I have seen the results of that first-hand and from long ago where one event I helped organize had commercial booths allotted based on certain people's personal connection to them even when other similar companies were even more LGBTQ friendly. In other words politics. I stood against that but I was essentially out-voted. After some years of seeing how all that was going and getting more common I stopped volunteering and assisting with that event I've learned long ago that without enforced rules or limitations the end result is always chaos and with that, failure. Conversely I've also been part of a organizations start-up where our means of funding was ourselves, and that wasn't enough to do the job, so we had to accept the support and funding of others just to keep the dream alive even when that meant we were collaborating with "bandwagon" people whose motivations were only for themselves and not really for us Thankfully we passed that point and I can still remember when we first declined acceptance of one of those kinds. When that vote went around we were all smiles because we knew that not only had we done the right thing, that also meant that we'd crossed the threshold of success and our little organization would now survive and prosper as it should Beggars can't be choosers and you have to get past begging to truly succeed. There's really no connection between LGBTQ and ABDL save that both groups are not well accepted in society and that some of us fit both groups. In that much at we should at least tolerate each other since that's what we want for our own selves. Bettypooh
  2. I can do anything anyone else can do except swim or wade deeply wearing my diapers, so I can't see how it's disabling. Incontinence could best be described as a medical condition which requires treatment I think. That would still leave diapers covered by insurers but free us from any social stigma or questions regards our ability or lack thereof. My ever-weakening back, carpal tunnel syndrome, and breathing issues are more disabling to me than my lack of bladder control. Bettypooh
  3. @DAQ Humans are odd creatures- we see things which we think we want and try them, sometimes discovering there were other things attached which we hadn't noticed (or didn't give enough weight to) which changes our minds. And sometimes things which were once happy and/or exciting become dreary and boring. But we must try, because we're human. I experienced the downsides of wearing as we all do when we go 24/7, and there was a point where I had to stop and consider whether it was the right course for me. I did need some protection but not to the level of wearing premium diapers which is what I wanted- pull-ups would do to handle the needs. What decided it for me was knowing that my appearance changed enough for it to be noticed when wearing a thicker diaper or not, and I didn't want to be exacerbating that personal issue by switching back and forth. Rather than risk unwanted discovery through variance I settled on a single appearance- diapered- and accepted whatever else came with it. For me it was the right decision; YMMV. After that I went through a period of great happiness knowing that I was finally going where I really wanted to, but in time that happiness changed to simply being satisfied with myself in having done the right thing. There's still a small joy in me when I think about my diapers, but I rarely think about them anymore. I know for certain that it's what I want to do on a continuous basis. Not everyone will be that way. Since you can manage with or without diapers you get a choice, so choose as you will knowing that whatever you may decide it's you who will have to deal with the consequences of your decisions whatever they may be. And that if you want to start back with wearing you already know well what some of those consequences will be which will make dealing with the change easier. It's up to you to make yourself happy, so do what that takes. Bettypooh
  4. This is a good question! I worked with a one-armed house painter who could do about anything I could do, just that some things he did in a different way. He didn't consider himself disabled at all even if some people would. And semantics does enter this discussion too. As a whole society we determine what words and things actually mean, yet one's own personal perceptions always remain valid for oneself. You don;'t have to define yourself or accept someone else's definition of you, but you should understand that if their perception and yours differ substantially. Like so many other things in life there is often no clear-cut answer, nothing which can be divided into black or white because it's neither. Society does set a minimum level of what it considers handicapped or disabled, and we have to deal with that when we're dealing society. That doesn't make it right or wrong necessarily, it just makes it how it is. We are free to disagree with society and to try to change things, but in the end it is society which is going to make many decisions for us if we want to be an integral part of it. Which we don't have to do. Diapers and incontinence do not limit me much (almost none actually) and the few ways that they do constrain me are of very little consequence to me. I simply refuse to accept society's standards here on a personal level, but I do make concessions to society in how I deal with this when I'm out in the world. It works, I'm happy with it, and so is society. Bettypooh
  5. When a "mental condition" reaches the point where it's a true illness or disorder, insurance should cover it. But it often doesn't, even when it progresses much farther than that. Insurance is a scam where you are often left having to choose between one evil or another as both aren't covered. And there are many like me who can't afford insurance but make too much to be eligible for assistance; that is the biggest reason I'm for socialized healthcare which covers everything- nobody and nothing goes uncovered for anyone who needs it. I'm happy to buy my own diapers but having some financial help with it would be nice, which is how i think things should be done so that the wearer can decide which product works best for them. Those with no financial ability would be able to acquire something adequate even if not the best. tldr: If a person has a real and true need for something to remain healthy and active in society, then they should have that. It should be seen as a human right. Bettypooh
  6. I've recounted my own story many times but to recap, I tried my best to gain bladder control as a child but couldn't, and nobody believed me when I said I was trying. My early daydreams of being diapered were pleasant and felt proper for me. Perhaps that was a sign of the future... Some of us simply have to be incontinent to gain the full inner peace everyone should have. If you're one of us, you'll soon know it if you begin down the path of desired incontinence, and everything about it will become your own 'normal' being at least accepted if not pleasant, and with much being pleasant about it. It changes your perspective of yourself and you begin to understand that your own happiness isn't tied to other people's perceptions about continence. Rather than having "OMG!" moments you have "Oh well- time to change again" reactions instead when you leak. You will have the deep inner satisfaction of knowing that you've achieved a goal which you know is right for you, and you'll feel happiness every time you think about that. And you'll learn to truly like certain aspects of it if you don't like them already. I'm currently forced into a 'limbo' of minimal diapering, but I can't wait till my situation changes and I can get back to wearing and wetting as I need to do, which hopefully will be soon. Losing my inner peace and self-satisfaction regards my diapering has left me with constant low-level depression but I know it's not going to be forever so I'm managing. Nothing else in this world like a dream fulfilled constantly! Bettypooh
  7. My urine production is totally unpredictable and erratic. I can't find any patterns to it nor any connection to food or liquid intake or activity or weather. It's been like this my whole life. I have no discomfort or irritation passing urine- the discomfort comes from trying to hold it in when my bladder spasms. There are two times I can count on having to pee: on waking up in the morning and after a cup or two of coffee. Otherwise I might pee gallons a day or nearly nothing at all, and I can't tell which it will be until it begins to happen, and that can change as the day goes by. Bettypooh
  8. As I've mentioned elsewhere circumstances beyond my control swept me back to needing bladder control again and I'm there now- as much as my slight physical leakage will allow me to be that is. I'm not happy about that but I've got to survive and it's the only way. What makes it tolerable is that it's not permanent. Like Mark I was well along the way and didn't think it was possible to go back since I was usually not conscious of urine being released. I think the difference with me compared to most is that I didn't follow any plan (like the 12 month one) but simply began removing my conscious attention from anything related to peeing, so that when it became necessary I was able to go back- not that I wanted to. I'm now much like I was when I began needing something more than pads to be safe from wet clothes but only due to uncontrollable leakage due to my weak external sphincter. I can feel when my bladder is getting full again though I can't tell when it's become too full to stop, and I'm using the toilet as I feel that way. Being that all I have is cheap store-brand pull-ups to wear I don't have room for error. Since my bladder muscles hadn't atrophied but only weakened in about two weeks I regained about 80% of my limited control and about two more weeks got back almost all of that. Those who use the 12 month program or any other method which weakens the pelvic floor muscles may not have a similar experience. The same for those who bedwet, as that part is beyond conscious control. Emotionally it's been very trying and keeps my depression at the door instead of in the distance. The only thing keeping me sane is knowing that eventually I'll once again have a place of my own where I can be free to wear without worry about any consequences of discovery having any effect beyond that directly.I've always believed that you can do what you have to do if you put enough effort into it (physical limitations notwithstanding) and I am nearly giddy when I think of how great the journey back into full-time wear and use is going to be. Throughout my journey there were many times where needing diapers was a PITA but I accepted that and found it could be dealt with as long as I could afford them. But I never lost my deep desire to be wearing them- not once, and I never will. I'm not happy right now but I'm still in diapers albeit crappy ones, so for now that will do because it must. Bettypooh
  9. Not wise to hold your urine for too long, as that can backflow into your kidneys and poison you. Which I presume isn't fun or enjoyable. And while this method may seem to have merit, it's going to take longer than you want to become effective, and may not become effective at all. My whole life I've had what they now call "Neurogenic bladder" which is where you have symptoms like OAB, SI, and UI happening. In my case what happened is that my detrussor muscle (the one which squeezes the bladder to empty it) would spasm without reason, rhyme, or warning. I spent most of my life either clenching down on my external sphincter to prevent leakage or being ready to do that at an instant. Using a muscle regularly strengthens it, not weakening it, but in time it can more or less damage that muscle rendering it weaker or more to the point limiting it's flexibility to extend and contract as much as it should. So after 40+ years of doing what you propose, I did start to lose bladder control beginning with drippage, going onto spurts, and finally with both reaching a level where pads would not handle it anymore and I had to begin wearing diapers. Which I was sort of OK with being I'm something of a DL, but it wasn't fun having it happen without me being able to do anything to stop it. I'd have to wear to work, to family events, and such whether I wanted to or not. It was nerve-wracking for a couple years till I became comfortable with my constant wearing and discovering that people wouldn't know I was wearing unless I did something to cause that to happen. So yeah, if you want 40 years of trying with no better chance of losing control than any other method then go ahead. Be ready for the consequenses which could even be fatal. It's not something I'd recommend anyone do, especially when the same thing can be accomplished safely in about a year or two for most folks who want that pesky bladder control to go away. Bettypooh
  10. What I've spoken of in my previous response is a legal right, as has been determined by the US Federal Government's Courts. It has nothing to do with "human rights" or any other self-interpreted meaning someone wishes to assign to the word "right". How things are elsewhere I do not know which is why I specified "USA". It is something I've researched well as it had importance to me back when I was actively and publicly advocating for the LGBTQ community to wit: There are still laws on the books in places here which make it illegal to wear clothing of another gender. Our legal system does not prevent them from being on the books or even from having such laws newly-legislated; it only prevents them from being enforced once they are found to be unconstitutional. The ruling which gives us this right was based on someone wearing a T-shirt which had what is generally deemed a curse-word printed on it, which they were prosecuted for. Their argument was that their prosecution violated their 1st Amendment right to free speech, which had already been ruled to extend to the written word. In the decision which cemented this right as ours, the Courts clearly expounded that the right extended to the wearing of any clothing by anyone, and that at a Federal level is was only directly applicable to groups who had been given specific legal protections against discrimination as that is all the US Constitution allowed directly, but indirectly the ruling was also applicable as a limitation on all States who are not as limited in scope of their legal powers. Since a diaper is clothing it is therefore legal and indeed your right to wear one anywhere in the US. Where the States and their subdivisions may enact laws is in regards to legal standards regarding what they deem to be offensive, but only as far as levels of lewd exposure of what they deem to be genitalia and underwear but not to extend any further than that. And moreso there has just been a Supreme Court ruling which says that the right of free speech extends to the use of profane words in public. You'll soon be seeing "Fuck" brand clothing on the racks in stores and in online shops, which further solidifies the prior ruling of clothing choice being a 1st Amendment protected right in the US as the brand name will be visible when worn by design. Personally I don't agree with all of the above but that matters not- this is the law of this land. My own beliefs are that we should be considerate of those we're living with and around, as well as being considerate of how our choices and actions could affect the ABDL community at large. I see no wrong in wearing diapers under clothing even if it is sometimes unintentionally exposed. I'm OK with in-sight wearing in places where such may be expected, such as PRIDE events and conventions related to the subject, and even in areas where the community would be tolerant of it at any time. What I am against personally is when someone wears openly with total disregard of others around them- especially children- or when they expose their diapers intentionally under clothing as a means of causing other people to react to it. TBH I would love to have a world where I myself could wear more openly, but I don't see that happening for me in my lifetime. This paragraph is just my opinion- not a legal allowance or restriction which is what this thread is about- and if you want to you can find all I've spoken about online. Google it as I neither have the direct references anymore nor the desire to spend my limited time digging them up- and I'm not going to argue those points further. I know the truth and you can too. Bettypooh
  11. I can gauge when my preferred diaper is nearing it's limits by how high I feel wetness in back. If you pay attention you'll find certain characteristics with any diaper to let you know something about it's remaining capacity. How far you push those limits is up to you. Bettypooh
  12. I do enjoy my flowers, but all of them are potted. Where I used to live I would occasionally give them their morning water drink pre-dawn wearing a diaper with or without anything else so long as the neighbor's lights weren't on. Can't do that here where I'm at now Everything "diapers" here is highly restricted due to circumstances but when I can get the F out of this place and into one of my own, that's going to change back to how I want it The move did make one flower issue happen. My Mom gave me a pink and white Camellia- beautiful and a rare coloration. It was getting root-bound in a huge pot and there was no way I could deal with it here so it went to my dearest friends house where she gave it a special place in her yard- we planted it together. It's doing very well, she loves it as much as I do, and now part of my Mom is safe and will live on forever where I can go and enjoy it any time I want to Bettypooh
  13. All I can speak of is the US, and while there has been no direct Court ruling I can find, the tone of the other clothing rulings is such that wearing diapers is in itself legal- there are several rulings to base that on where it was found that essentially you can wear whatever clothing you wish as long as it does not directly infringe on the rights of any named protected class of citizens or abrogate laws of common decency. The only questionable part would be whether a diaper is considered to be underwear and whether a communities standards on lewdness regarding underwear exposure would extend to diapers. There are various rulings allowing underwear exposure which in general allow it partially but not fully- those distinctions are made at State and local levels and so far the Federal government has only remanded cases back to States with only Constitutional points noted instead of the actual case question itself. So a diaper under clothing would almost certainly be legal, even if partially exposed, thus wearing it is a right up to that point. It is only the level of exposure, or perhaps whether it is defined as underwear, which might be questionable. It's not a subject and Court wants to deal with but if it were, I'm quite certain that it would be deemed as legal much as we handle it here on this website: No visible 'scat' by intent and nothing implying anything illegal or immoral regarding minors. More than a legal point, this is a point of mostly social acceptance, and in that how a place's laws might be allowed to follow the wishes of that society in general. Being that there are those who medically need diapers there could not ever be a total forbidding of them anywhere, but there could be some controls regarding their use, exposure, and disposal. Should I ever win the lottery I will personally force the question through the Courts to a high enough level that everyone would be allowed the reasonable open wearing of diapers should they wish to because I feel that it's time to get past this and every other form of discrimination based on assumption Bettypooh
  14. I can't speak of bowel incontinence, but life's circumstances have placed me to where I needed to regain all the bladder continence that I could and sadly I have done that. Being strongly willed I managed to achieve the reverse journey in 4-5 weeks. I'm back to the point where I only leak via my medical conditions- OAB, SI and UI- and otherwise I can hold it. The process was gradual and TBH will take a lot longer for most folks. My smallish bladder never much shrunk on my journey which definitely helped but even that can be handled via more frequent toilet use. I am much looking forward to changes in life letting me rejoin my journey. At most I think a couple months more is all I will need to get back to where I can have the peace of mind of wearing and using diapers again as I had been, and that chance at future bliss is one of the few things which has kept me going through this rough patch in life. Bettypooh
  15. Any process of telling others is as much or more self-reinforcement as it is making that discovery easier for them. In actuality there is never anything precluding a complete change in you. I almost fully transitioned to life as a woman, hiding nothing ever, for two full years. Then I ended it with no real consequences to anyone or anything but my feelings. So to consider the same situation for an unseen thing there's even less reason to go there. It's not really going to change things any more than waiting for discovery to tell- all the rest is inside of you already or not. If you're destined to wear 24/7 then you will regardless. If destiny does the opposite to you that can't be changed either. Bettypooh