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I know that feeling. I FINALLY got the VA to send me Megamax USA V2 diapers. I requested 2 cases per month, but they're sending me 3! The weird thing is when I reorder them I get nothing for like 10 or 14 days. Just long enough for me to forget about them. Then out of the blue they just show up at my door step. It's a wonderful surprise.

Yesterday was a great day.  i came home from work to find two packages on my porch.  I bought a bag of CutieplusU pink diapers and a bag of cutieplusU blue diapers.  Next week I should get a case of Forsite AM/PM diapers with 3 extra diaper samples from Healthwick.

Hypothermia 

Chapter 8: Heart-to-Heart Tales of the Sanctuary: Book 1 - Denial – LittleFallenPrincess     “Wait, a phoenix? Are you joking? Those aren’t real!” Lucy replied, upon hearing the same story I told Susie and Beth. I still wasn’t up for telling them all myself, thankfully I had Susie speak up for me, telling them everything I had told her. “I’m not joking. That’s what Bea says she is. And you know Bea isn’t one to lie about things. Apparently there are only a few of them left.” “So you’re not a slut… and you’re not a badass?” Nia asked, crassly. I just looked at her, with me probably looking visibly upset, before walking away. And as I did so, I heard Vic scolding her, “Nia… Keep that pretty mouth of yours shut. If you can’t say anything nice during this difficult time, maybe you shouldn’t have speaking privileges…” The short ‘meep’ afterwards indicated that Nia was going to behave from now on. But for now… I needed some space.   Clambering under the low door frame to the little plastic play house that was set up in the playroom of the Sanctuary, closing the door behind me and sitting down on my padded backside, I knew this place would be my own little safe space away from everyone’s stares and judgements. Even knowing this side of me now… they wouldn’t expect to find me here. It was always my secret little area to hide out in if I got overwhelmed, as people only usually use this for events. Most of the time, if people are hanging out at the Sanctuary, they jump straight into the ball pit. For now, I just needed a bit of space to myself. All those people… even if they were there to help Sera and me… it was all a bit too much for me, especially when I’m feeling so vulnerable. It was the way they all looked at me after I told them not only about Sera, but the fact that I’m a little just like them… it was like they were looking at a stranger. This… this is why I was hesitant to tell anyone. This is why I kept a secret for so fucking long. Because as soon as they find out I’m a different person to what they thought… they change. They no longer see me anymore. They see the person who was lying to them, they see the person they never got to know… even though they did! I’m still me… I just… I’m just good at pretending to be strong, is all. And as the weight of everything came crashing down, the overwhelming sadness smashed into me, causing me to tear up instantly, sobbing uncontrollably into my arms as I sat there, hugging my knees, pressing them as tightly as I could to my chest. Pain wracked my body as the weight of the loss of my girlfriend finally hit me. All this time… I was sorta in shock… I just assumed… I just… I assumed that Beth would help. She’d find out what it was that was preventing Sera’s rebirth, fix it, and I’d be back to cuddling my girl in no time. But… this… all this… I wasn’t ready. I had dreamt of telling everyone everything. I had envisioned it all, planned it, but there was no way I was ready to enact any of my plans. I needed time to build up the confidence and motivation to tell even one person, and here I am now… and everyone knows. At least my friends anyway. And then it dawned on me… what if Beth is not able to identify what is going on with Sera? I’m just… a bit lost. What if… what if I don’t get her back? What if she’s lost to me? I couldn’t go on without the love of my life… As panic began to set in, and my heart was beating a mile a minute… there was a hollow thud at the door to the large plastic house. “Bea…” I’d know that snarky voice anywhere. “Leave me alone, Nia…” I replied, snapping back at my friend. I pushed a plastic play chair up against the door to block her from getting in. “Let me in…” Nia replied, as she tried to forcefully open the door, but finding it stuck. “Nia… leave…” I growled, pain in my voice. The rattling of the door stopped and everything went silent for a second. “Not a… fucking…” Nia barrelled through the open window, crashing face first to the soft play flooring. “... chance…” “Nia, I’m not in the…” “Beatrice… I’m serious. I’m not letting you be alone right now. Come the fuck here so I can hug my fucking friend.” Her crassness was weirdly comforting… Climbing to her knees, she opened her arms up, indicating to me to crawl over and hug her. But I wasn’t in the mood for any of her bratty bullshit right now. “Leave me…” before I could finish my sentence or object, she leapt forward, wrapping her arms around me and hugging me tightly. There was something oddly… comforting… soothing… and warm… about her hug. It was like being hugged by clouds and rainbows and happiness. Which… wasn’t like her. Her hugs are great, don’t get me wrong, but they’re a bit more… intense… usually anyway. This was different. But in a nice way. So with my face buried into her shoulder, my eyes closed by still streaming tears, I embraced the warm, comforting hug by my friend, wrapping my arms around her. But something felt off. There was something in the way. I tried connecting my hands around her back, so I could squeeze her as tightly as she was squeezing me… but there was something blocking me. “Nia… I…” And as I pulled away, I was nearly blinded by a dazzling light… and something I never expected to see on my demonic friend’s back…   “Nia…” “Umm… yeah?” she replied, sheepishly, trying to avoid eye contact as she just sat there in front of me, as if there wasn’t a giant red flag on her back. “What… are… those…?” “I… ugh, I fucking hate when this happens…” she growled, seemingly frustrated with herself. “Are those… WINGS?” I sat back in shock, pointing at the dazzling white feathery wings that were clearly attached to my friend’s back. “I… maaaaybe…” “They’re not demonic… wait… ARE YOU AN ANGEL AGAIN?” “I… maybe? I’m not sure.” “Not sure? How does that work?” “Look, I saved Vic ages ago, and something felt… off. And once I fell in love with her, my memories have been returning, albeit slowly. Then when I saved Vic again during that whole Lucy-Hunter bullshit months ago… and then brought Fiona back from the brink of death… I’ve had this… issue. They keep appearing when I don’t want them. They’re annoying, I have to keep them hidden like all the time, and I have to be extra careful getting close to people… as evidenced here.” “Nia, you’re talking about them as some kind of ‘divine STD’…” “They pretty much are!” she snapped at me. “Do you… not want them?” “NO! I like being my demonic self. Sure, I like having my memories back, and I like being on speaking terms with my family again, even if it’s only some of them. And I love that Lucifer is back in my life again without having to pretend to be my boss. But these things… I don’t want!” “Did… did you get anything else? A halo perchance?” “Bea… Do you seriously think we have halos up in Heaven?” she asked, rolling her eyes at me. “I… well I don’t know!” “Look, something has happened. Whether it’s Dad trying to be nice seeing as I broke his stupid curse… or if he’s being an asshole… or if it’s someone else entirely… I don’t know. I just want these things gone.” “Who else knows about them?” “Lucy. And… that’s it. Though Fiona and Avery do know about my ability to heal…” “Wait… what ability to heal?” “Oh… right… we never said how badly Fiona got hurt did we…” “Nia…” I growled at the girl, making her eyes widen in fear. I’ve still got it, it seems. “Look, she was nearly about to see our deathly associate… and I had to do something!” “And you healed her? How did you know you could do that?” “I just… had a feeling. I can’t explain it!” she shrugged, pouting, her angelic wings relaxing outwards in response, as if they were reacting to her emotions. “So yes… I brought her back. Sorta. Kinda.” “And then…” “And then the wings popped up shortly after! I’m going crazy, I don’t know what to do about them.” “Why haven’t you talked to your Mummy?” “Talk to Vic? Bea… you know what she’s like. The moment she finds out about this… she’ll bury herself in research, and you know how bad she gets when she does that.” “She does like to focus on something. It’s why I was so happy when she had you to focus on, it was a lot healthier for her,” I replied, smiling. “Exactly! And if this ends up being something big and serious and potentially world ending… I don’t want her anywhere near it! The more she researches… the more likely she’s going to be in danger.” “You think these wings are going to lead to something catastrophic? Why do you think that?” “Oh come on… when has anything like this happened without it being followed by some big fucked up thing that threatens the fabric of the universe?” “Nia… that’s only in stories and TV shows… it never happens in real life.” “EXACTLY! No angel has ever lost their wings then regained them again. Lucifer was the only one with wings, but she didn’t lose them, she always had them! It was one of Dad’s little jokes on her. Now here I am… regaining my memories… getting my wings back… becoming…” Nia began to pretend to throw up, before looking at me with a grin. “Becoming an angel…” “Is that a bad thing?” I asked, not understanding the problem. “I… no… but I mean… I like being me.” “Well… I can understand that.” “Yeah… speaking of which… Since when were you a subby little baby? Also… may I say… daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!” Nia said, really emphasising that last word as she winked at me. “You make one hot little…” “I… shush…” I blushed, unable to process this. I was used to Nia flirting with me. But that was the other me. Domme-y me. “Seriously. If I wasn’t taken, and I wasn’t a ridiculously subby little shit… I would domme the everloving fuck out of you!” “I… sorry for not telling you about me sooner.” “I’m not mad, Bea. You kept it a secret from everyone, hun. And you did a damn good job… which just makes me worry for you more. Losing someone like that… I know what it does to someone. Especially a little. Us littles tend to feel things a bit more… intensely. And with the whole autistic thing too? I’m surprised you’re not a complete mess.” “Internally, I am.” “Then let us help. However we can.” I could hear the empathy in her voice. It was weirdly comforting. Weird because it was coming from this little demon brat. “You’re just like your sister, you know…” I smiled warmly at her. Nia looked confused, but flattered at this compliment. “Lucifer? How so?” “She also got super protective when she found out I was autistic.” “Wait… she knows?” “Three people did. Beth, Lucifer… and Sera.” “This Sera… she must be special, eh? If she captured your heart… and made you lie to everyone…” “She didn’t make me lie. I chose to. She told me to open up more… but…” “It’s scary, huh?” “You get it. You were the brat of Hell…” “Hey! I still am!” “Yeah… but letting yourself be vulnerable… to be little… It takes a lot. Especially after so long putting on the tough act.” “It does, yes. So you’re going to sit here with me, and tell me all about your lovely girlfriend to help calm you down. Then we’re going to go back in there, we’re going to get your girl back from wherever she’s gone… and we’re going to have a fucking tea party!” “I think she’d love you…” I smiled, reaching out and squeezing my friend’s crimson hand. Nia just grinned in response. “Hey… what’s not to love?”           ===================================================== If you want to read a month in advance (that's 8 chapters), or just want to support me and my writing, you can do so through Subscribestar! 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Richy's processing is completed and he is sent home. We then move three years into the future to find that his sister has a big day ahead of her as we see what Richy's post designation life looks like. ---  I am only able to write as much as I do thanks to the generosity and support of my subscribers. Writing is my only source of income and it is because of these people that I am able to do that. It allows me to keep the lights on and puts food in my fridge. My subscribers get early access to all my stories, and access to around 30 EXCLUSIVE stories that are only available for my subscribers along with other benefits. If you are interested in supporting me and getting these benefits please consider checking out one of my subscriber pages. Thank you ❤️  https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy ---  “Guards!” Brianna called out, “He’s ready.” “Ready?” Richard repeated. “To be moved to the pen.” Brianna smiled. “Oh.” Richard was struggling to keep up. There were just too many thoughts going through his brain. “Here. Put this on.” Brianna carried over a plain red t-shirt. It was very similar to the one Richard had seen on the other person that had been designated Baby when he had been in the queue. It was awkward. Richard hadn’t let someone dress him for as long as he could remember. There was more than a little fumbling before the shirt was pulled over his head and down his body. Predictably, it didn’t cover his diaper. His diaper. HIS diaper. Richard found the words swirling around his head as the guards stood by the open door waiting for him. Brianna helped him off the table and he could immediately feel the difference to what he had been wearing previously. The padding pushed his thighs apart and when he moved, he could feel it all rubbing against him, which wasn’t to mention the noise. Each crinkle was deafening. “Could you take him to the pen.” Brianna asked the guards. Richard had his arm taken by one of the guards and he was led out of the nurse’s room. It was like trying to walk with a pillow between his legs, he kept trying to squeeze his knees together only to find that the diaper blocked that from happening. He was made to waddle back towards the lobby and, for a heart stopping second, thought he was going to be paraded in front of everyone else. Instead, the guards opened another door that led to a large room to the side of the lobby. Richard found a playpen with five other adults in it. All of them looked distressed. Outside of the pen there was a glass wall, and on the other side of that… “Oh God…” Richard moaned. He ducked behind the guard, desperate to not be seen. The other side of the glass partition was a lot of people, mainly couples, looking in and smiling. As Richard was led in, he saw that a lot of faces turned his way and he had to quickly drop his gaze to the ground as his face blazed from the humiliation. He didn’t understand what was happening, it was almost like a zoo. The gate to the playpen was opened and Richard was given a little push in the back to make him toddle inside. He turned around to see the gate being closed. The guards left the room shortly thereafter. Richard looked up at the glass again. It was strange he could see people talking to each other, laughing, smiling, pointing Littles out… but he couldn’t hear anything. “Help!” Richard shouted, “Help!” There was no reaction from the people on the other side of the glass. His shoulders sagged and he turned away. He wasn’t even sure what help he could expect. He had been designated Little and that was all that mattered. No one could do a single thing to help him. Richard slumped to the ground and looked around at what he now realised was a playpen. The space was large, and amply equipped with toys, which seemed somewhat optimistic if the current inhabitants of the playpen were anything to go by. There were five other people, all separated from each other as if they were each worried they might catch something. There was another young man on the far side of the pen. He had a red scarf around his neck and seemed almost comatose. Presumably the shock of having his life ripped away from him. There were two women, both looking morose and with scarfs around their necks, it took Richard a second to realise, because one had her back to him, that they were twins. Another young woman was against the side of the pen with her legs drawn up and hiding her face, which also unfortunately exposed more of her diaper. The final young man was nearest Richard. He was sitting with his legs open idly batting a ball back and forth looking strangely less affected than everyone else. Richard scooted a little closer to him. “They can’t hear you.” The young man said without looking up. “Huh?” Richard grunted. “The people, the… Bigs.” The man said with a sigh, “You were shouting. The glass is thick and soundproof.” “Why are they even there?” Richard asked as he tried to pull his shirt lower, “I’m Richard, by the way.” “Charlie.” The man replied, “And they’re there to adopt us.” “A-Adopt… but my parents…” Richard stammered. “Relax. Not all of us.” Charlie said, “Just the ones with red scarves.” Richard looked around the pen again and saw that there was a very clear difference between those with the scarf and those without. He suddenly realised that describing the pen as being like a zoo was wrong, it was more like a pet shop. The Bigs were prospective “parents” choosing Littles. “There seems to be a lot of us.” Richard said, “I thought it was only a few people who were designated Little.” “Yeah…” Charlie shrugged, “I don’t know. Maybe it’s bad luck, maybe they lie about the figures to stop young people rioting. Who knows…” Richard slumped down. He found himself subconsciously checking for a red scarf even though he knew he wasn’t wearing one. It must’ve been a good sign. Surely it meant that his parents hadn’t abandoned him… yet. “You seem very calm about all this.” Richard said. He was aware that he wasn’t screaming anymore either, he was exhausted from the struggle up to then. “Meh, I kind of expected it.” Charlie replied, “Not too bothered, to be honest.” ““Not too bothered?”” Richard repeated with a frown. “Yeah, it could be worse.” Charlie shrugged again. Richard was starting to regret talking to Charlie. At first, he thought he might have someone to share his pain, now he felt like he was talking to someone who had lost their mind. This was the worst thing that could’ve ever happened to Richard, and he was pretty sure the rest of the people in the playpen felt the same way. He decided that Charlie was probably lying to himself to get through what was happening. Before Richard could work out how to reply, or if he even wanted to, the door he had walked through previously opened. Richard looked up to see who the latest poor soul being thrown in with the others was. But it wasn’t another person designated Little, it was two Bigs. It was Richard’s parents. Richard caught a glimpse of them and immediately his eyes filled with tears again. He had a childish want for his mom and dad to fix everything, to tell the government that there was a mistake and that he was a Big. He could see from his mother’s eyes that no such thing was going to happen. Both Richard’s parents had very serious looks on their faces as they walked in. “Oh, Richy…” Davina said with a sigh. It was all Richard could take. He started loudly crying again. He couldn’t take his parents seeing him like this, it felt like the final nail in the coffin. He covered his face and started to wail louder than ever before. He was barely aware of one of the guards opening the playpen gate and his parents coming in. “Come on, son.” William said as he hooked his hands under Richard’s armpits and helped him to stand up, “Let’s get you home.” Richard stumbled forwards and out of the playpen flanked by his parents. His life had been flipped upside down and there was going to be an awful lot of adjusting to come. --- Three Years Later… --- Richy sat in his playpen. His diaper, wet from an “accident” in his highchair during breakfast, squished underneath him. There was a lot of activity in the house that morning. Richy was mildly interested as he sucked on his pacifier. One of the very, very few benefits of his position was the complete lack of stress in most things. He never had a deadline, he never had to look after anything, he wasn’t expected to do a single thing. It had been a little over three years since Richy had been designated Little and his feelings hadn’t changed at all. He saw it as a loathsome experience, a never-ending degradation that he had no choice but to endure. He tried not to think too far into the future anymore, it was liable to give him panic attacks. The worst part of it all, for Richy, as his family insisted on calling him, was watching his parents and sister start to look at him differently as time went on. When he was walked out of the Designation Office it seemed like his parents were as shocked as he was, the drive home had been in near silence apart from his sobbing. Over the days that followed his life was completely upended. There had been a near continuous stream of deliveries made to the house as everything he knew and owned was replaced. With each new baby item acquired, it was like Richy could see his family’s opinion change just a little more. After a few months they seemed to think that him being a Little was completely normal and fine. Richy still fought things, but by that stage his parents were finished with acting like he was an equal. Since then, each day had been monotonous. Richy rarely left the house, which he was grateful for because it was awful being seen as a Little by anyone. He woke up in his crib, had his diaper changed, was fed breakfast, played with toys, had his diaper changed again, ate lunch, nap time, more playing, diaper change, dinner, and then was soon after put back in his crib. It was mind-numbing. Richy didn’t talk much anymore. His parents didn’t like him doing it, anything beyond babbling or basic words would get a stern look. Sometimes, if he really got frustrated and pushed the boundaries, it would end up with a punishment, often a spanking, that left him in tears. He had been rebellious for the first month, he tried to fight everything that changed, but he was gradually worn down. His becoming more docile was sped along when the Designation Office sent inspectors to the home. The inspectors were very serious people. They visited Littles at home and assessed their environment, made sure they were being treated correctly, and made suggestions for improvements. In Richy’s case, they saw his continuing bad behaviour and issued a warning to the family. If Richy’s parents couldn’t get him under control, then he would be taken by the state and adopted by someone who could. That was a terrifying prospect for Richy. As horrible as it all was, it would’ve been worse surrounded by strangers, he was quite sure of that. Kate came into the living room and sat down on the couch. She had her shoes on and was looking at her phone, using her free hand to pick at her lip. She was clearly anxious, and it took Richy a moment to remember why. When it hit him, it was like a freight train. Kate’s eighteenth birthday had been a couple of weeks before; she was going to get designated. Suddenly the clear anxiety on her face made sense, she’d seen what being designated Little looked like after all, Richy couldn’t blame her for wanting to avoid it at all costs. “It’s time to go.” William, Rich and Kate’s dad, said as he held the car keys in his hand. “I don’t want to.” Kate replied. “I know, sweetheart, but you know there isn’t a choice.” William said to his daughter sympathetically, “I’m sure everything will be fine.” Richy, sucking on a pacifier, almost laughed. They spoke as if he wasn’t there, he knew that his input wasn’t wanted, heck, it was likely to get him in trouble. He wasn’t supposed to care about anything the grownups said to or around him. “Claire said it runs in families!” Kate said with an anxious frown, “I don’t want to… you know.” Kate was sweet, but Richy knew exactly what she meant. She didn’t want to end up like him. Her eyes flitted to his position in the playpen, she no doubt was picturing herself in there with him and how horrible it would be. Richy certainly wouldn’t deny that it sucked, though the company would be nice. “I’m sure that’s not true.” William said. “What if it is!?” Kate exclaimed. Richy watched his daddy sigh and then walk into the room. He sat down on the couch next to Kate and they shared a moment, he put an arm around her waist, and she leaned into the hug. Richy felt very much like he was intruding on a private moment. To make matters worse, his stomach was starting to rumble, and it had nothing to do with being hungry, it would be the high fibre diet he was fed everyday making his digestive system very quick, not helped by three years of ignoring signals that he needed the toilet. “We will love you no matter what.” William said softly. Richy could tell that it was scant comfort to his sister, but he could attest to his parents loving both their progeny. Despite how much harder he had made things for them by being designated Little, they still did their utmost to look after him, even if it meant doing things he greatly resented, even if he was having one of his “tantrums” as his mommy called it. Richy sat up on his knees, half bent over with his butt sticking out behind him. Before he closed his eyes, he saw Kate looking at him with fear, a worry that she was watching a portent of her future. Richy screwed his face up as he pushed with his tummy muscles, a routine he had gone through innumerable times in the previous three years. Nevertheless, it was still a process that brought him immense embarrassment and shame. Each dirty diaper feeling like confirmation of his place as a baby. In front of his dad and his sister, Richy reached out and held the bars of the playpen as he felt a momentary build up of pressure in his bowels. He let out the breath he had been holding as he felt his soft poop easily push out of his body, his mostly liquid and mushy food diet making his waste as soft as his diapers. It was all over after just a few seconds. Richy opened his eyes. Nothing seemed to have changed inside the living room, and yet the sticky feeling in the seat of his diaper told a different story. With a sigh, partly relief but mostly utter humiliation, Richy dropped back and sat on the floor, sinking into the mess he had created and feeling a small shiver go up his spine. His face was a bright red as he looked up at his family members bashfully. Kate looked like she was about to cry. “Oh dear.” William said quietly, “Don’t worry Richy, we’ll get mommy to come change you in a minute.” Richy had assumed as much. He had been very much encouraged not to ask for diaper changes. He was either supposed to get the attention of his parents by crying or simply wait for them to come check him. There was a minute or so of silence. Richy didn’t really know what to do, his diaper was starting to stink up the room, but Kate didn’t seem keen on leaving, he didn’t blame her. Eventually, it was Richy’s mommy walking in that seemed to unfreeze the moment. “Phew, smells like someone is overdue a change.” Davina said as she waved her hand in front of her face for dramatic effect. Richy thought she was exaggerating. It didn’t smell THAT bad, though he had to acknowledge he had become somewhat “nose blind” to himself. Davina turned to her daughter, “You two better get a move on, you know what happens if you’re late.” Kate took a deep shuddering breath and finally stood up. William followed and together they made their way out to the hallway. “Good luck.” Richy said quietly. “Thanks.” Kate replied without looking back at him. There were hugs and kisses before the front door opened, and Kate left the house. Richy stood up and looked through the front window as they made their way down the path, Kate already seemed to have shrunk into herself a little, like a threatened turtle retreating into their shell. He wished her luck. As much as it would provide him some comfort to have his sister in the same place as him, he wouldn’t wish the life he now had on his worst enemy. “Baby, you’re not supposed to be standing.” Davina said after she walked back into the living room. Richy quickly sat back down. The rules stated he wasn’t allowed to stand unless someone was holding his hand. As he landed back on his bottom, the mess in his diaper spread even more causing a shiver of disgust to go up his spine. “Well, you definitely need a change before your nap.” Davina said as she waved her hand in front of her nose, “But I’ll feed you your bottle first.” Davina left the room with Richy grimacing. He always hated when he was left in his poopy diaper for longer than absolutely necessary. He hadn’t yet got a diaper rash, which seemed like a miracle to him, but it still felt so gross. When his mom came back into the room holding a large bottle, she unclipped the lock on the playpen on her way to sitting back down on the couch. She patted her lap and Richy started crawling. It didn’t matter that it had been three years of crawling, Richy still felt embarrassed every single day. He was quite confident he would never learn to not be embarrassed by his position in society. When he was sometimes taken outside, which wasn’t often because of the tantrums he had, he sometimes saw other Littles that seemed very serene and accepting of their lives. He didn’t understand them at all. Richy climbed on to the couch with his bulging diaper swaying behind him. He turned over and laid down across his mommy’s lap, facing the ceiling and with one of her arms cradling his back. He found it difficult to meet her eyes. She had fully accepted and embraced his position, but far from making it easier, it seemed to make Richy feel even worse. In a well-practiced routine, Richy opened his mouth and soon tasted the latex tip of the bottle. The nipple, like the whole bottle, was much bigger than on an actual baby’s drinking device. It had taken some time to grow used to feeling it so far back on his tongue, but it was well short of his gag reflex or anything like that. He started sucking and soon felt cold milk bursting into his mouth. It tasted good, almost good enough to make him forget about the sludge he could feel pressing against his skin in his underwear. “Do you think Katie will be designated Little, baby?” Davina asked. Richy knew it was a rhetorical question. Something his mommy did to occupy her mind whilst waiting for him to fill up on milk. Richy didn’t try to respond, but he answered her in his head. He had no idea if she would be made Little or Big. He had never thought he himself would be designated Little, so he thought he probably knew less than anyone else. “Having two babies to take care of would be difficult…” Davina said idly, “We’re not made of money, your daddy has to work and just keeping up with you can be a challenge. I never expected to have to be doing all of this again. The government keep cutting the subsidies to help with looking after you too…” Richy was hearing things he never usually heard about. His parents usually made sure not to talk about anything grown up around him. It was the first time he had been hearing that his parents might’ve been struggling a little financially. “It’s typical, right?” Davina let out a little laugh and shook her head, “The men in suits create a burden for us and promise to help, and then… Oh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be saying any of this here. Drink up, baby.” Richy was quickly filling up on the milk. He knew it was a special formula, just like the food he was given. All fortified with extra minerals and vitamins which meant he could get by on a mostly liquid and mushy food diet. On rare occasions he was given solid food, as a treat, and those days were like magic. Tasting those delicious foods he used to know rather than the bland baby food was like all his Christmases coming at once. “I don’t know if we could cope with two babies.” Davina continued. She wasn’t looking at Richy, instead staring into the middle distance as she held the bottle to his lips, “We might have to consider…” Davina trailed off. Richy swallowed his milk with increased anxiety, a fresh burst of warmth in his diaper highlighting his fear. Had his mommy about to say that one of them would have to be adopted? Richy hoped not. As bad as his situation was, he didn’t want to leave his family, and he was keen for his sister to stay as well. “It doesn’t matter.” Davina said as she shook her head a little as if coming out of a daydream, “We’ll cross that bridge if we come to it. I’m sure your sister will be fine.” Richy finished his bottle in silence. The nipple, previously clear but now a milky white, was pulled from his lips. He was left panting slightly and could feel the milk weighing heavily in his stomach. His mommy looked at the bottle to make sure it had all been drunk and then placed it on the couch next to her. For a few seconds she remained seated, idly patting Richy’s bulging rear. “Let’s get you changed and down for your nap.” Davina finally said. Richy scrambled off his mommy’s lap. His stinky diaper was stuck against his skin but at least his mommy reached out her hand so he could walk upstairs. It was a lot better than having to crawl. He toddled after his mommy, waddling in the wide-legged way that would be recognisable to any mother with a small child. The shame was still immense, but Richy had learnt not to complain lest he wanted punishment. He was taken up to his nursery, a sight which would’ve shocked him if he went back in time four years and showed himself. He wished he could, at least it might’ve jolted him into action and stopped him ending up where he was. The nursery used to be Richy’s bedroom. When he woke up some mornings, he still expected to see his desk and computer opposite his bed, his consoles in front the television and a mess of clothes on the floor. Instead, he saw the bars of his white crib, the changing table opposite, a box of toys that was open and their contents scattered around the room, and a playmat. The sinking feeling he got when reality stepped in and asserted itself always made him want to cry. In the early days, sometimes he had done just that. “Up you get.” Davina said as she patted the padded changing table. Her other hand reaching to the shelf underneath to pull out a fresh diaper. Richy climbed up on to the table with little difficulty and laid down, sighing as he the humiliating ritual began. It was always the same. A pacifier was placed in his mouth, and he stared up at the ceiling, imagining an alternative world where he had been designated Big. He listened to the tapes of his used disposable get pulled and then felt fresh air as it was lowered. He closed his eyes as he was cleaned. It was particularly bad when it came to what his mommy referred to as his “boy parts.” He was a young man, he had urges which he wasn’t allowed to satisfy, it didn’t mean he never found a way, but it was difficult and if he was caught, he would get in big trouble. All of that meant that, sometimes, when his mommy pinched the end of his penis and used it to make space to clean, there could be a reaction. Richy closed his eyes as he was slowly wiped clean. It always took longer when he was messy. Sometimes, when mommy opened the diaper, the results were so bad she would abandon the endeavour and take him to the shower instead. This time she settled for making some comments about how stinky he was and set about her task. It was a relief, at that point, for the messy padding to be pulled away, balled up, and dropped into the pail at the end of the table. The fresh diaper was slipped underneath Richy and powder sprinkled on top. He sighed and felt pleased to be out of the poopy diaper, trying not to wonder how long it would be before he was in another one. Whenever he started thinking about what his future looked like it made it all much harder to take. He was helped off the changing table and led to the crib, which he climbed into with a pat of encouragement on the rear. “Have a nice nap.” Davina said as she kissed him on the forehead and raised the bars. Richy sucked on his pacifier as he pulled his baby blue blanket up and over him. It was crazy, he thought, just how much his parents, his mother in particular, truly saw him as a baby. As if the day before walking into the Designation Office he had been a mature adult, and the day after leaving it he was a useless baby, like he was a completely different person. He rolled over to face away from her as she left the room, pulling the door to but leaving the baby monitor on. Naps had become part of Richy’s everyday life. He may not have wanted to sleep when he was told to, but his body had grown used to it. He didn’t much want to admit it, but he definitely did get crankier when he missed his nap and spent the afternoon feeling tired and irritable. His last thoughts were of his sister, Katie, who despite his reduction in status had still always treated him a little like an equal. He wondered exactly what kind of relationship he would have with his sister when she returned with her destiny decided. ---  If you liked this update and want to see the next update RIGHT NOW you can do so here: https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/mozb40hx8a1381/chapter/mqdmgyyz79d54f5 https://subscribestar.adult/posts/2540939