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By Kitty Angel · Posted
111. My New Best Friend The drive down to Greater Ashfields was a long one. It wasn’t actually that far, but I knew that the traffic through Raybridge would be bad because they’d been digging up the main street the last time I passed through. It wasn’t normally something I would think about unless I was in a hurry, but somehow I didn’t want to be held up here. Some part of me was worried about some rabid fan seeing Kernigan, even though I knew how irrational the fear was. The man was a recluse, after all, and even a fan as obsessive as Ffrances didn’t have a clue what he looked like. Still, I didn’t want to be sitting in traffic with him in the truck. Reaching the bottom of Oak Road I could already see a chain of brake lights in the distance, even at this time in the evening. I muttered something under my breath that I wouldn’t want to repeat, and then turned off towards Crooklands Village. “It’s a busy town?” he asked, brought out of his reverie by the suddenness of my movements. “Not really. Greater Ashfields is the main town in these parts, but I think if you wanted a serious day out shopping you’d go farther afield. It’s getting pretty late now, I’d think we already missed all the commuters going home, but it seems some people didn’t manage to escape gridlock in Raybridge. They’re rearranging the roads, putting in new lights or something, so it’s down to one lane on the main street. And I guess they managed to get in the way of a lot of young professionals heading to Greater Ashfields for a dinner date or something. Don’t worry about it, the country roads will get us there in no time.” “Time enough to tell me more about your mysterious quest?” he asked. “I don’t think most people would go to such lengths to get a new comic, and I knew there must be more that you haven’t told me. So perhaps we could pass the time by sharing the story.” I wanted to say that it was my business; but I knew that he was doing me a big favour here. Even if I’d gotten him the cheese, he was still under no obligation to help me. He was a major celebrity, and I’d come to him asking for help without even being a real fan. So I tried to tell him everything this time. He’d spoken to Ffrances before on some of the online forums related to his work; of course he had. I mentioned that I thought she would be using the username Ephemeral Addict or some variation, and he said that was a name he knew, but he’d thought she was a guy. That made me think a little about how people present themselves online, and I started wondering if that kind of misunderstanding really mattered. But he still wanted to know what I was actually planning; what I had asked Isaac for, and why he might have asked for Kernigan’s autograph in response. So I vaguely outlined the structure of our lives at home: my relationship with Ffrances, and the sudden arrival of Tess when her parents left the country. How we’d been doing our best to act like a family, even when circumstances made it difficult. Feeling that I could trust this man, I even mentioned that Tess was being pursued by a young man with a troubled background, who could only be a danger to her. And then, as we got closer to Greater Ashfields, I told him that I wanted to make sure we were a family; a step towards the life I had dreamed of. There was a long moment of silence, and I didn’t even know what I could say then. But after stroking his chin for a minute, Kernigan nodded. He understood. And with the biggest hurdle overcome, I told him what I was hoping to achieve, and how he could help to bring our family together. He actually laughed when he heard the first plan I’d had in mind; and then he said that it sounded like I was a very thoughtful and caring person. I still couldn’t stop worrying about Tess and that boy; not knowing what had happened yesterday was hurting me. I hoped that he hadn’t upset her too much, but after all my conversations with him I was sure that he would end up pushing her into things that she wasn’t ready for yet. And I thought that the sooner that happened, the better it would be for all of us. But I couldn’t say anything about that now. It came to my mind every time I told someone about our family, but I had promised myself that I wouldn’t mention Tess’s desire to be a baby unless I knew that it would be good for her. That was something best kept private, so I omitted any mention of regression as I told Kernigan about the efforts I had already made to bring our family together. He laughed when I finished the story. He told me that he was sure the symbolism of that particular comic wasn’t really appropriate, but that Ephemeral Addict would probably find it funny. And he said, after a moment’s thought, that he might have another idea that could help me, although he wasn’t sure if it was too over-the-top. I told him that my girlfriend practically worshipped him, so he could be sure that any idea would be appreciated, no matter how crazy. He didn’t say any more, as we were already parking up in Greater Ashfields, but I sensed I had earned this guy’s sympathy. More than just a trade of favours, he actually wanted to see me succeed, and I couldn’t wait to hear what he thought he could do for me. But that would come after our visit to Malarkey and Sons. It looked closed when we walked up, but that was always the case. I could see the faintest gleam of electric light, warm gold, around the outside of the windows. And that told me that if I pushed on the door it would likely open. I pushed. The lights were on inside, dim as usual. But somehow even without uncovered windows, you could tell that we were inside the strange store in the evening, at a time when civilised people would no longer be shopping. It felt like some kind of taboo, and I wondered if Isaac would say anything when he saw me. I could imagine him turfing customers out without warning if he thought that they might hang around after the time when he wanted to join his friends in the basement. “My word!” Kernigan gasped. “I’ve seen shops with a theme before, but this is truly atmospheric. Advocate must be a real master of his art.” “I’m afraid I might not have the time for much conversation tonight,” a jovial but weary voice came from between the rows of filing cabinets where this place kept much of its merchandise. “But I would be happy to greet anyone with whom I have exchanged words in another space.” Kernigan chuckled, but didn’t answer right away. I had read enough of his comics to know that ‘another space’ was a kind of alternate world where people with sufficient power could project their consciousness into something like a shared dream. And I could guess based on Ffrances’s comments in the past that some of his fans had taken to using the same term to refer to the online forums where they congregated. I could guess, though it took me a couple of seconds to parse the words, that the name he had used, Advocate, must be Isaac’s online moniker. And so the shopkeeper thought he was talking to a fellow fan who had found this place after reading some of his posts on the net. Which wasn’t too far from the truth, now I thought about it. “I would be glad to meet you too,” Kernigan said. “I had heard about this place, and was curious to see it. It looks just how I imagined, but somehow it also feels real. So I am very glad that this young lady was willing to help me find my way.” “Hi Isaac!” I called out, not sure where his rocking chair would be among the cramped aisles, so waiting for him to find us instead. “I found someone who might be interested in meeting you. Hope we’re not interrupting game night.” “Ah, Gabby! Always a pleasure. I’m afraid Ffrances isn’t here tonight, I think she’s working late, But you’re always welcome to join us.” “Games?” Kernigan perked up, and I could rapidly feel the situation getting out of my control. But if these two got on well, I knew that would just make it easier to get what I was after. “The basement here has a group of friends meeting up for gaming,” Isaac explained, coming around the corner. He looked a little more stylish than usual; maybe he dressed up when his friends were coming round. I hadn’t really noticed before, and that made me wonder how many other things I’d missed. How many of the people I talked to had secrets that I should have noticed? I promised myself then that I would start paying more attention to the people around me, and try to understand them more instead of pigeonholing them into a single defining trait. “Thankfully, the basement isn’t full of coffins. Although some people might say that the people down there now are stranger.” Maybe that would have been the wrong thing to say; I wondered a second later if either of the men might take offence. But Isaac chuckled and nodded. “So, you two want to join us?” he said a second later. “We’re playing quick games this week, a break from all the serious while Ffrances and Luke are away. Starting with Fluxx, which is always good for a laugh.” I thought about it for a second; I didn’t think of Isaac’s friends as my kind of people at all, and most of the games they played seemed to require an encyclopædic knowledge of the rules. But that one, I could probably get my head around. Still, there were more important things to do tonight. I hoped that this brief visit would be enough to convince Kernigan to trust me with a bunch of autographed merch, which I could bring back to Isaac in order to prove my dedication and secure a copy of the Gold Ring comic before Ffrances got her hands on one of her own. A perfect gift, that would remind her just how romantic I could be, and allow me to make all my dreams come true. “I’m sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “I think Mark needs to get back, and there’s probably people calling for me on the radio. I’m supposed to be organising a big conference today, and I’m on-call 24/7.” “Oh, I’m sure we can stay awhile, if we’re invited. And the deadlines aren’t too pressing right now.” I couldn’t believe Kernigan. And I couldn’t believe I’d gotten myself into this situation. I was supposed to be organising a conference, and a big part of that was keeping Kernigan out of the public eye. But instead, I was going with him to a card game party, and trying to keep his identity hidden from a bunch of his fans. What had possessed me to do something so crazy? But every part of it had seemed like a good idea at the time, and I knew there was no way I could back out now. I sent a quick text to James Reznor, asking him to cover for me on the radio because I was off-site doing errands for one of the creatives; which was true enough. I could see a dozen ways this would come back to bite me in the ass, but I still knew it would be worth it. “Yeah, why not?” -
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Second day in a row...zero appetite again! Thought I got past this last month...but the cold front Sunday sent my headache into orbit...and food has been the last thing on my mind.... Forcing myself to eat some milk and peanut butter cookies before trying to go to bed again in a few minutes!
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