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I can´t agree with you. Yes he has choose not the best complains, but you have the full picture. 1. His mother is controlling. 2. His father is passive. I think he couldn´t learn to tell his problems and feelings. 3. He is in a room with his mother, crush and a peer. He is embrassed, angry, ashamed and has a lot more emotions swirrling inside, not only in this moment. If you are so self-conscious you can´t think objectiv. 4. For his parent his feelings doesn´t matter or why his condition get worse. If his mother care, she would take him to see a doctor, or try to communicate with him etc. I have a controlling mother too, my father is always annoyed and uninterested. My father only "cares" if he try to get out of a fight with my mother. If you call anger as care? I haven´t learn to communicate my problems and hide them. I try to downplay all my problems and can´t trust other to help me. I need to be perfect and need to solve my own problems. I see a lot of me in him. Sometimes i wish he would take more drastic methods to tell the others what he feels about the whole situation. -
By Kitty Angel · Posted
More like cutting to a different plot thread, I think. Or leaving a cliffhanger 😛 If I was cutting to commercials, I think I'd be posting a chapter of The Littlest Spy (which has been waiting a while because I didn't want to interrupt the flow of this section). I think it's harder to be sure what to post when it's going to be several chapters of Gabby at work, then a bunch of Gabby and Ffrances, then a whole bunch of Tess at school. It feels like I should try to interleave them so the people who are only reading one don't feel neglected; but that's less than ideal for people who are reading both. Ah well… nearly time to start Act V, which comes with a completely different set of issues 116. My Confession I stared in shock. I’d spent a lot of time today to bring me and Ffrances closer, building something special to make our relationship perfect and hold our family together. What could have happened to give Ffrances second thoughts? It wasn’t the first time that she’d slapped me, but normally I could tell that she meant it affectionately. This time it wasn't some kinky game, I knew that she was angry. The way she walked away made me think that she didn’t even want to see me, which was a completely new feeling. I knew that she had to have misunderstood something, but I couldn’t guess what. And if I didn’t know what she thought I’d done, how was I supposed to think of a good explanation? I shook myself out of my stupor long enough to step inside the kitchen and close the door behind me. I didn’t chase after her yet, but thought hard about what could be wrong while I took off my coat and shoes. There was only one conclusion I could come to; and it was one that I should have seen coming, if I’d just thought about it. Ffrances could track me. There were apps on my phone to control a bunch of remote control vibrators and similar toys, so that Mistress could tease me wherever I happened to be. And that was a lot of fun, but it also meant that many of those apps would give her some kind of status report; like whether my phone was in do-not-disturb mode, or driving mode. She would know when I was in the car or when I was at work, and I guessed that she might be able to find out where I was in more detail than I had realised. It was entirely possible that she had seen me in Moistville, at the end of a day when I’d told her I would be coming straight home from the conference. She could have been here waiting for me, when I didn’t respond to her messages, and then she checked with some piece of technology and saw that I was in a bar in a city an hour’s drive away. What would she have thought? Did she think I was deliberately neglecting her? I knew that I would have to find some kind of explanation. But what? I couldn’t tell her the truth; so I’d have to make something up in order to calm her worries until the big day. But what could I say? My mind was whirling, trying to find the right idea that I needed. But everything seemed too trite, or not believable. Really, I needed to know just how much she knew. Was she just mad that I was home later than I had promised? That was hard to believe, because I’d left work without helping with any of the cleaning up. Even offset by sinner and an hour each way to Moistville, I still wasn’t much later than I would have been coming straight home at the end of the day. Was it because I hadn’t heard her messages? Was it because she’d found out I went to Moistville; or because she knew that I was in a bar? The answers I needed to give her would be very different in each case. Or it could be something else entirely. Had she heard that I’d gone to Malarkey & Sons without her? I would think that was a good thing, trying to get on with her friends so that perhaps they could be our friends. It was something I should have done a couple of years ago; but maybe it would seem weird because I’d chosen a day when she wasn’t there to introduce us. But if that was the case, maybe I could spin it… If I got to know Isaac better as a person first, and could call him a friend, then it would be easier to calm my paranoia when I saw him flirting with my fiancée. But then… what if Ffrances had heard from someone that I brought Kernigan there without telling her? I was sure that if she’d known he was going to be there, she would have wanted to meet him as well. But that wouldn’t merit a slap, would it? There was no way I could be sure. I needed to know how much she knew about today, and what exactly she was mad about, so that I could put together a story to calm her down. And there were too many things that she might or might not have heard about; things that would make all the difference. So I would have to wing it, and just hope that I could come up with something believable on the fly. The TV was still on; playing silently. Flickering images illuminated the lounge in a complex dance of shadows. I guessed that Ffrances was planning to carry on watching something later, but right now I guessed that she was just waiting for me. There was no sign of Tess either; I wondered what she was up to. Could she have gone to bed already? The absence of her flask from the fridge suggested so, but it was still a little early for her to be sleeping yet. Maybe she was still down after her afternoon with Spike; if she’d ditched the predator it might take her a couple of days to get used to the change. I knew that I should talk to her; if I could comfort her then it would make it easier for her to heal. If nothing else, I could help her to have a little accident and feel like a baby. Regression would be a big comfort, even if she was too nervous to ask. And I was sure that in the circumstances, her previous demand that I check with that boy would no longer apply. I carefully unlocked her bedroom door, trying to make no sound, and started to ease it open. I didn’t want to disturb her if she seemed to be sleeping peacefully, but if she was restless she would surely benefit from someone to talk to. “Gabby!” Ffrances’s voice startled me, and I almost lost my grip on the door. “Tess is trying to get an early night. Might be an early start tomorrow. You need to talk to me first.” She reached past me to grab the door handle, and closed it sharply. I wanted to tell her that I needed to check on my baby; but I could see from her body language that Ffrances wasn’t about to tolerate any kind of disagreement. This was her most dominant persona; but not the fun one. She didn’t say anything else, but grabbed my wrist and strode towards the stairs. She almost pulled me off balance, and I found myself struggling to keep up with her, but there was no way I could have fought her now. Despite the difference in size, she was just too strong for me. “Your colleague called,” she said as she dragged me back down the stairs. “He thought you’d be on the road because it was only five minutes after you left that they realised. And they didn’t want to call your mobile when you’re driving, because you seemed tired already. Asked me to tell you when you get home that you need to respond to his message. In case you didn’t check your work email once you got here.” “I was…” I started, and then hesitated. She knew what time I had finished work, so she knew that it had taken me hours to get home. I wondered what this message might be; but then remembered that there was one more work order I would need to sign before the landscaping department could come in and clean up any mess left behind by all the celebs and their trailers. That was one thing I wouldn’t have been able to delegate, so the email was probably from Ken or Jessop. It could wait, so long as I returned the document with a digital signature before midnight. I sat down on the couch and made a mental note to check those messages before bed; while Ffrances turned the lights on low and sat down opposite me. “Something you’re embarrassed to tell me?” she said, and I knew that I was already digging myself a hole, not even sure why. “I wanted to tell you that before we deal with the problem. So that I don't forget later. And if it’s important, I will try to remind you. But you’re trying to think of a lie, aren’t you? I can tell from your body language. Which means that your delay getting home involves something you don’t want to tell me about.” “I wouldn’t–” I started again, but fatigue was still eating away at my brain. It was the worst possible time for an interrogation. Or the best, I guessed. But Ffrances surely knew that, and I knew that there was no way I would be able to hide anything from her if she really thought it was worth digging up. “I don’t mind you having secrets, honey. We’re not joined at the hip. So a couple of questions. Be honest with me, and I won’t need to ask the rest. Are you cheating on me?” “No!” I practically yelled, automatically starting to get out of my seat. Then I glanced up towards the ceiling, hoping not to hear that I’d woken Tess. “No, I would never–” “I know. You couldn’t fake that kind of surprise. So I have to wonder why you would feel the need to hide it from me. Is it something you regret, or that you think you’re going to? Are you ashamed of where you’ve been today? Is it going to hurt anyone? Or have you done something that I’ll disapprove of?” “No,” I said more firmly as I sat down again. “I really hope I won’t have a reason to regret it. It’s not shameful, and I would never hurt anyone. Especially with this. Everyone involved is happy with what they’ve gotten out of it. And I really hope you’ll like it.” “Sounds like you’re planning me a surprise party,” she said with a laugh, and she couldn’t have known how close she was to the truth. “You know my birthday is still months off, right?” “Yeah,” I mumbled. And I realised that the easiest way to end this line of questioning would be something like the truth. Maybe I should have thought of that sooner. “I wanted to surprise you with something nice. And this particular… It’s like a narrow window of opportunity. Maybe even a once in a lifetime thing. And if I know you as well as I want to, you’ll love it.” “Then I won’t ask any more. I do still trust you, I like surprises, and I’m sure it will be wonderful if you’re planning it so far in advance. I’m sorry. But given the circumstances of this conversation, and your nervousness, I felt it was necessary to be sure.” “I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to take so long. They said I could go home early because I’d been working hard, but I didn’t realise how tired I was. I didn’t realise how much I needed a break, and I thought I had time to drive up to Moistville and sign something. And then I was asleep on my feet, so I went to get dinner and a coffee. Maybe napped a little in the booth at a nice little bar, that might be why I didn’t hear your messages. But then it was late, and I still had to get home… I should have known my limits. By the time I realised I was going to be late, I couldn’t do anything about it. And if you knew I’d finished work early, you could have been worrying. That wasn’t fair, so I really am sorry about that.” “I would say that if you’re organising something you think will make me happy, you don’t need to apologise. But really, don’t put yourself in danger. Even for me. That’s a serious thing. It’s not my place to reprimand you for that, but you need to take care of yourself. Promise me you won’t do that again.” “I promise,” I said. “Sometimes I need someone to tell me I’m pushing myself too hard. And I’ll do my best to listen when people are saying that. And other things, I guess. Since I started thinking about this… present… there’s a few times I’ve realised that I’ve made things harder for myself just because I didn’t hear people saying things that didn’t fit in with how I wanted to see the world. I need to think about other people’s judgement, and other people’s feelings as well. And I promise, if you tell me what I need to do, I will seriously…” I hesitated, and took a deep breath. “Not obey you without question,” I said, and wondered if Ffrances would be as surprised by those words as I had been when the thought came to me. “Following Mistress’s orders is fine in the bedroom, but for stuff like work-life balance, and serious decisions, I need to actually think about the choices. But if you tell me I’m too caught up in my own world, I promise that I will think about it. Reconsider my assumptions, kind of thing. I’ll try harder to consider that I might be the problem. And you’re the person I trust most to tell me when I need to step back and take another look at the situation.” “Thank you,” she said. “That does mean a lot.” “Like Tess,” I said, and tried to hide a little internal smile at how easy it was to segue into the questions I wanted to ask without giving the impression I knew that her little groomer had been here. I had to show that I had no idea anything had happened to sour their relationship. “When we told her that regression might help her take a break from the stresses in her life, even if she doesn’t want to. And she said only if her friend agrees that she needs it. He’s her touchstone, and you’re mine.” “Yeah,” Ffrances nodded. “Well, I’ll try to keep you on a healthy path, just as long as I can believe there’s a good person in there behind all the delusions. And that brings me back to what I needed to talk to you about. Before this evening’s events changed the subject.” “Okay. So what’s up? Why the slap? Have I been ogling one of your friends without noticing, or something?” “I’m sorry about that, but I really was mad. It’s been simmering away for a while now, and I needed to take some deep breaths and count to ten before I confronted you. But you’ve given me a little more hope now that even if it’s the worst thing I imagined, you might try to redeem yourself. Whether that’s even possible I can’t be sure, but knowing that you’ll try is a good first step. And you need to know that I’m serious.” “Okay,” I said. “Like I said, I need to know when I’m in the wrong. I don’t want to hurt my family, and I do see you as my family now. If I’ve made a mistake, I swear I will do whatever I can to fix it.” “Okay. So just answer me honestly, if you can.” “Yeah?” “What the hell did you tell Spike?” Do you think Gabby will have the right answers? Is she going to come clean so the final act can be reconciliation and redemption, or is she just going to double down? And if she wants to make amends, do you think she'll be able to? -
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Where abouts in London are you? I'm in SE London... ❤️
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