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    For more in-depth critiques of stories and story writing discussion.

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    For any story that uses AI in any significant fashion. See rules inside if you have used AI to decide if your story belongs here.

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  • Posts

    • Dr sent me to make sure UTI wasn’t anything more serious
    • Chapter 15: After drying off from their afternoon at the water park, Marshall and Ryder spent some time wandering the ship. The cruise had felt enormous when they first boarded, but now it felt like they were discovering its final hidden secrets before reaching Avalon.   As they turned a corner on one of the upper decks, Ryder’s eyes immediately widened.   Bright lights flashed through an open doorway. Electronic music echoed down the hallway. The arcade.   “There it is!” Ryder exclaimed.   Marshall laughed.    “I was wondering when we’d find this place.”   The moment they stepped inside, Ryder felt like a kid again. Rows of racing games, claw machines, air hockey tables, basketball shooters, and blinking prize counters filled the room.   The arcade was packed with excited passengers trying to squeeze every last bit of fun out of the cruise.   The next few hours flew by. Marshall and Ryder competed in racing games. Ryder narrowly beat Marshall in a motorcycle simulator. Marshall got his revenge at air hockey. Then Ryder somehow managed to win a ridiculous amount of tickets on a basketball game.   “I think it’s rigged,” Marshall said.   “It’s called talent,” Ryder replied proudly.   Their laughter filled the arcade.   While Ryder was trying his luck at a claw machine, a familiar voice suddenly called out.   “Marshall?”   Marshall turned.   “No way.”   Walking toward them was one of Marshall’s friends, Rubble. The two exchanged an enthusiastic greeting before Rubble noticed Ryder standing nearby.   “And who’s this?”   Marshall smiled.   “This is Ryder.”   Ryder offered a friendly wave. The three quickly fell into conversation. Rubble was easygoing and funny, constantly finding ways to make Ryder laugh. Before long, the three of them were moving from game to game together.   They spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out.   More games. More stories. More laughs.   By the time evening arrived, Ryder felt like he’d known Rubble much longer than a single day. For someone who had been so nervous at the start of the trip, making a new friend felt like a huge accomplishment.   As the sun began setting outside the ship’s massive windows, the three eventually parted ways.   “See you in Avalon,” Rubble said.   “You better be there,” Marshall replied.   Ryder smiled.   “Definitely.”   ⸻   Later that night, Ryder returned to his cabin feeling exhausted. It had been one of the best days of the entire cruise. His muscles were tired from swimming. His cheeks hurt from laughing. His mind was filled with excitement about Avalon.   As he got ready for bed, he looked at the supplies Marshall had given him. He hesitated. Marshall had helped him earlier. Maybe he could handle it himself this time. Determined to prove he could manage on his own, Ryder carefully tried putting one of the diapers on without assistance.   He thought he had done a decent job. Maybe it felt a little strange. Maybe it wasn’t perfectly comfortable. But he convinced himself it was fine. Good enough. He didn’t want to bother Marshall. Not again. Satisfied, he climbed into bed and quickly fell asleep.   ⸻   Several hours later, Ryder suddenly woke up. His heart sank. Something felt wrong.   Very wrong.   As he sat up and realized what had happened, embarrassment flooded through him. His attempt at independence had not gone nearly as well as he’d hoped. Ryder buried his face in his hands. Why can’t I get this right? The thought stung more than he wanted to admit.   He hated feeling helpless. He hated needing assistance. Most of all, he hated the idea of waking Marshall up again.   For nearly ten minutes he sat there debating with himself. Maybe he could handle it alone.Maybe he could figure it out. Maybe—   His eyes drifted toward his phone. Eventually he sighed and typed out a message.   Marshall…Can you come help me?   A few moments later came the reply.   On my way.   ⸻   Marshall arrived looking tired but concerned. The moment he saw Ryder’s expression, his frustration disappeared. Ryder looked miserable. Embarrassed. Ashamed.   “Hey,” Marshall said gently.   Ryder couldn’t even meet his eyes.   “I’m sorry.”   Marshall sighed softly.   “Buddy, stop apologizing.”   Together they worked through the cleanup. Marshall remained calm and patient the entire time. Not once did he criticize Ryder. Not once did he make him feel bad.   When everything was finally finished, the room grew quiet. Marshall sat down across from him.   “Can I make a suggestion?”   Ryder looked up. Marshall rubbed the back of his neck.   “I think we should talk to guest services.”   Immediately Ryder frowned.   “Why?”   Marshall chose his words carefully.   “Because we’re almost at Avalon.”   Ryder listened.   “And once we get there, we’re going to be busy. Early mornings. Excursions. Group activities.”   Marshall leaned forward.   “If you’re staying by yourself and something happens, we’re running back and forth between rooms all the time.”   Ryder’s stomach tightened. He already knew where this conversation was heading.   Marshall continued. “I think it’d be easier if you stayed in my room for the rest of the cruise.”   Ryder’s face immediately turned red. “No.”   Marshall smiled patiently. “Hear me out.”   Ryder crossed his arms. Inside, his thoughts were racing. I don’t want to be a burden. I don’t want people thinking I can’t handle things myself. I don’t want to need help. The words stayed trapped inside his head.   Marshall seemed to understand anyway. “You’re not a burden.”   Ryder blinked. It was almost like Marshall had read his mind.   “This isn’t about you failing at anything,” Marshall said. “It’s about making things easier so we can actually enjoy the trip.”   Ryder stared at the floor. Part of him knew Marshall was right. That didn’t mean he had to like it. After a long silence, he finally nodded. “Okay.”   ⸻   The following morning they spoke with a cruise representative. After listening to the situation, the representative agreed that combining accommodations for the remainder of the voyage made sense. Within an hour, Ryder’s belongings were transferred into Marshall’s cabin.   Watching his things being moved felt strange. A small part of him still felt embarrassed. But another part felt relieved. No more worrying about being alone. No more feeling like he had to solve every problem by himself.   Once everything was unpacked, Marshall flopped onto one of the beds.   “There.”   Ryder sat nearby.   “There.”   Marshall grinned.   “You know what?”   “What?”   “We arrive in Avalon soon.”   That immediately got Ryder’s attention. Marshall grabbed the map they’d been studying.   “Five days.”   Ryder smiled.   “Five days.”   “New places.”   “New adventures.”   “Group Seven.”   “Group Seven.”   For the first time all morning, Ryder laughed.The excitement returned. Avalon was finally within reach.   ⸻   The two spent the next hour talking about everything they wanted to do once they arrived. Then both of their phones chimed at nearly the same moment. Marshall checked his screen. Ryder checked his. Their eyes widened.   GROUP 7: PLEASE REPORT TO THE MAIN LOBBY ENTRANCE.   Marshall jumped to his feet. “It’s time.”   Ryder could barely contain his excitement. All the nervousness. All the waiting. All the planning. It was finally happening. Grabbing their bags, they hurried out of the cabin and headed toward the front lobby. As the crowds of passengers moved around them, Ryder felt a huge smile spread across his face. Avalon was waiting. And whatever adventures came next, he wouldn’t be facing them alone.
    • Dungarees!  I haven't heard jeans called that since I read "The Hardy Boys" books back in the 1960's.
    • If it hadn't been AI, it would be a lot of wear and tear on her diaper!
    • All my freinds family and freinds know i wear cause of medical issues. my late wife and daughter knew i wore it was no big secret. wife new from day one. daughter also wore cause of her medical issues. i got diabetes bad and played havoc on my peeing then broke my lower back and had nerve damage. now i wear 24/7 cause lost the sensation of when i have to go #1 or #2. so its just a normal part of my life now.
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