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Chapter 109: Throw “YEAH? I NEEDED to get back here in time?” I said, feeling exposed and embarrassed in front of my former nest mother right then. “Well, you’re here, and I’m in luck that I get to change a much prettier Little than I usually do!” She picked me up before I could warn her about me probably leaking but quickly carried me to a small changing room on the first floor I didn’t know existed. She used one hand to unfold a disposable changing pad. She placed it on the metal changing table and laid me on it. “You soaked through your onesie and skirt,” she said as she flipped it up. “Here, sit up for a second,” she told me. I rolled upward, and a second later, she pulled the jumper over my head and then the onesie to leave me only in the sagging and soaked diaper. “Umm… what am I going to wear?” I asked her nervously. “Don’t worry, we keep a few spare things in here for this type of emergency,” she assured me. “Let’s get you out of that soggy diapee first, though!” I really felt that Lilly did a better job of changing my diapers. However, Mackenzie was still better than several changers I’d had. She was gentle, wiped me thoroughly, and dressed me in a spare diaper from my backpack. “You don’t have a spare outfit in there, do you?” I blushed, “I used it this week already?” “That’s fine, we’ll just use a spare shirt here,” she told me. I watched her dig through a bin for a moment before coming out with what looked like a simple pink sweater at first. Once she pulled it over my head, I realized the arms had several rows of ruffles by the wrist. Even with the top being too large, it barely covered much more than the top of my diaper! “Sorry, no leggings or pants; we’ll just have to get you up to your nest. You’re wearing a diaper anyway,” Mackenzie told me as if that excused my nude legs! “Let’s just get up there quickly?” I asked. She smiled, picked me up, bounced me up and down, and then carried me out of the room. The temperature in the lobby area felt like it dropped thirty degrees from an open door to the outside. Several other Littles were coming from a common area on the first floor then and seemed to all stare for a second before looking away. I blushed and felt like my face was probably as hot as the sun! Fortunately, the elevator trip, plus her long legs, had me to my new nest pretty quickly. “Hi Mackenzie! Did you catch a stray of mine?” “This fish wasn’t in the water, but I thought I’d bring her to you?” “Thanks! Looks like she had a wardrobe issue - what did you do with her wet clothes?” “Here,” she said, handing her a clear bag. “I almost just put them in the laundry chute, but since you kidnapped her from me, I figured we’d make sure they knew the clothes belonged to your nest.” Mackenzie hugged me, “It’s good to see you, Carly! I’ll make sure I get down here to see you some other time. Be good for Miss Lilly!” She placed me on the ground, patted my exposed diaper, and walked out. Lilly giggled at me, and I noticed Ava and Mia looked like they couldn’t decide whether to laugh at me or feel bad. For my part, I just walked to my stuff and found a pair of black leggings. It wasn’t worth changing the top in my mind when I’d be putting on pajamas in a little bit. I had to admit with leggings on to cover my bottom half, I was pretty comfortable since the borrowed top was really soft! I found myself working on homework and trying to get ready for one of my first tests that was coming up on HoloTheory the next day. I had a good, solid grasp of all of the material so far, but I wanted to review all of the new terms and jargon that were used in the class. By the time I’d also done some brief studying for my intelligence class and math, it was nearly three hours after I’d returned. I stood up to walk to find Lilly for a needed diaper change before calling it a night! BETH WAS BLUSHING as she entered the dorm. She quickly sucked her coat off so she didn’t have to worry about anyone wondering about it. She folded the wet spot inside after taking a quick sniff and noting there was a residue of Carly on it. She groaned, and Nikki gave her a little smirk as she traveled up the stairs to the dorm. “Why don’t I take your coat? I’ll wash it at my apartment tonight?” “I can just put it in the laundry here?” Beth started to say. “You know the laundry is analyzed, right?” “Huh?” Nikki shook her head, “You’re so smart on some things, kid…?” “What do you mean?” “Someone about fifteen years ago figured out when they installed the auto laundry features for the dorm that they could also be clever and make sure no one was hiding bedwetting from them?” “You mean…?” “Yes, if you have any clothing in the wash that has a too-high urine concentration, you’ll be closely watched.” With a sigh, Beth handed her the coat, “Thanks for washing it then…” “Do you have another in case it doesn’t dry tonight?” Beth nodded, “It’s supposed to be a bit warmer tomorrow anyway, so I would probably have switched to a different one anyway.” “Good,” she told her. “This date tomorrow?” Beth blushed and smiled at the same time, “Yes?” “Would you mind if I triple-checked Carly’s plans? I don’t want to overstep, but I also want to make sure it’s a safe trip for you.” She did indeed feel a bit smothered by that but nodded anyway. “Sure, it seems like she did a decent amount of work trying to plan it already?” “I’m sure she did, knowing her family. No need to risk her missing something, though!” “Fair enough,” she said. “You’re not going anywhere else for the night?” Beth shook her head, “I have a test tomorrow in calculus I need to finish studying for.” “Okay, I’ll see you in the morning then,” she told her. “See you tomorrow,” Beth said, closing the door behind her and latching the deadbolt shut. She sighed, squeezing herself in a little hug, then changed into a comfy pair of pajama pants and a light purple top with a circuit diagram on it. Lance had given it to her for Christmas, and she appreciated its nerdiness. Dressed more comfortably, she pulled out her tablet and the review guide that her professor had kindly provided their class for the test the next day. She was about to the point of screaming about one problem when her phone suddenly rang. She stood, found it, and when she saw it was her mom, she answered with the holoprojection function, placing it on the desk in front of it. “Hi, Mom,” she said. “How are you doing, Sweetie?” She shrugged, “Ready to throw my tablet of calc work into the wall?” “That sounds normal,” her mom laughed. “The only person I know who didn’t absolutely hate that class was your dad.” Beth shook her head, “Carly is just as bad!” “How is she taking everything?” “Huh?” “The fact she’s stuck as a girl?” Her mom said. “Oh, that…” “That? It was supposed to be a temporary thing for the film? Surely she’s a bit upset, at least, at being stuck as a girl? Your dad would have been devastated?” Beth nodded, “Carly is fine with it, Mom. Actually, she’s better than fine with it, I think.” Her mom gave her the stare that always felt like she was opening her brain up and stripping out the knowledge from it, “She wanted to be a girl?” Beth sighed, “Yeah, I think so?” “Well, what about your relationship now?” Beth shrugged, “Seems fine still?” “You’re okay with going out with a girl?” Her mom asked. “You never seemed like you had a thing for girls before?” Beth shook her head, “I don’t have a thing for girls in general; it’s just Carly?” Her mom cajoled her into more information as their conversation went on about things she would never discuss with her dad. Eventually, she made her excuses and said, “I need to finish studying; give everyone my love?” As the line cut, Beth felt more drained and relieved to have spoken with her mother. Looking at the clock, she decided to hit the restroom and resume her studying. When she was past the point of getting anywhere, she went to the restroom again to clean her face and brush her teeth before climbing into bed and being tucked in by Rachel, who seemed to suddenly appear at bedtime each night. “Good night,” Rachel told her as she turned off the lights. I WOKE UP the following day with a swim with Lilly and Mackenzie before finding my way to breakfast and classes. Computational Intelligence was interesting that morning. I made some notes on some ideas I wasn’t sure Mom knew about yet! Our professor was currently involved in some research that furthered Grandma’s work in the field, and she was making some impressive gains in how the AI chunked new knowledge. Her thinking patterns seemed to be heavily influenced by her own kids’ development, which I found kind of intriguing! I walked to my Holofield Theory class and crammed a few last minutes of studying before the room was packed. Our professor passed out the same style of tablet we’d taken our placement tests on that first week. I appreciated that I was given a smaller one than my neighbors, though! “You have the full class time for this exam. We can work with you if you need additional time, but in my experience, you either know this material or you don’t,” Professor Davis told us. I nodded. To me, this was more of a memory subject than a ‘work it out’ subject like math or programming. “Just one other note, due to some issues I’ve had before, I would ask that you please not leave the room until after you complete the exam. You’re welcome to go before I activate the test and come back if you need to use the restroom, but I’ll collect your tests otherwise if you need to leave.” I squirmed at that, wishing that going to the bathroom was even a realistic possibility for me! “Well, at least I can just go…” I thought to myself even as several girls excused themselves from class, and one boy then. My diaper was a little damp, but I was pretty sure it would hold up until lunch based on how little I’d drank that morning. “Okay, I’m going to activate your tests now; they’ll start when they return. Good luck!” Immediately, my screen lit up, and I began working on answering questions about a subject that would have sounded like gibberish to me a few weeks ago! BETH HAD SPENT the morning when she woke up doing some last-minute cramming. She’d even made Carly quiz her on a couple of formulas before leaving her at her first class and heading to her own. During her Logic class, she discovered there would be a project due in that class in another week as one of her five grades. Fortunately, it seemed straightforward and not too time-consuming! Her professor annoyingly went over time by a few minutes. Since she was sitting inside a row, there wasn’t a good and tactful way to leave until he finished! She was a little worried that Carly wasn’t waiting for her or at her classroom until she checked her message and realized she’d hurried to her next class to cram for her own test. “Everything okay?” Nikki asked her. “Yeah, just was a little nervous for a second that Carly wasn’t here. She has a test in her next class, though, so she hurried there to do some last studying.” “I don’t miss being in school,” Nikki told her as she walked beside her. Beth laughed, “Aren’t you basically back in school now since you’re with me all the time?” She looked up at Nikki, who made a cringing face like she’d smelled something bad. “Well, at least I’m not taking the tests?” “Don’t remind me!” Beth said. She had to appreciate that the chill of winter had taken a break that day. It wasn’t nearly as cold as it had been the past couple of weeks. “I wonder if this warm weather is going to last long?” Nikki asked as if reading her thoughts. Beth shrugged, “Not sure, I was thinking that though? It’s been frigid the past couple of weeks!” They didn’t have much more time to talk before Beth led them into Marconi Hall and down the hallway to the small lecture hall where her class was held. She took a quick moment to detour into the restroom first and thought, ‘I hope Carly’s diaper lasts through this class?’ Once she sat in her class, she took a moment to pull out her notes again for her calculus exam. When her professor began class, she couldn’t help but note that it would be a long day before they wrapped up! “Okay, don’t forget that we have a test next Friday in this class…” he droned on as Beth made a note in her calendar about yet another test in the next couple of weeks! ‘Classes don’t seem so bad at the beginning, but then they just start piling up tests and projects!’ she griped. Her calendar was filling up, and it was still several weeks until midterms! She checked her messages as she left class and was a little concerned that she didn’t see one from Carly. I WAS MAKING quick work of the exam as it went through everything from the absolute basics we’d started with. The first question asked us to describe the particles involved in the projection of just the images. A follow-up question began to ask how you would manipulate the particles, and things continued on in that manner for thirty questions. About question thirty-one, I checked and saw there were a total of sixty, so I was halfway done! I was completing question forty-eight a half-hour later about the proper way to orient the projector lenses when I felt my stomach rumble. ‘Hush, I’ll feed you after this,’ I said, figuring it was just hunger since lunchtime was coming. Question fifty-three was a more theoretical-based question and asked about the proper formula for calculating the intersection of the particles of light with the stasis field you needed to generate. Fortunately, I remembered the formula, so I was writing it with the stylus even as I felt my body give off a little bit of gas in a fart. “Gross!” I heard someone complain a row away. I blushed but continued to work. ‘I hate that I don’t have any control over anything now!’ I thought to myself. The only warning I had before something happened now was when my body would decide to crouch, seemingly on its own. ‘Hopefully, it holds off until after this test!’ I grimaced a moment after finishing the fifty-fourth question as my insides seemed to twist some, but then there was a sense of relief in my body. I finished fifty-six before I heard, “Did someone just poop themselves?” From a girl a couple rows back. “Ladies and gentlemen, you must remain quiet through this exam. I will not warn you again.” “Professor, how can we concentrate when there’s a poopy-pants here?” The girl pushed back. “Breathe through your mouth,” he suggested and glared at her. I pointed my eyes back at my paper, but not before noticing he looked straight at me with a sympathetic glance. “Can I at least change her diaper?” The girl asked. “I’m sure it’s not comfy for her, and it’ll at least move the smell away from us?” “I told you, no one can leave the room?” He said, and I sensed he was trying to make excuses. “She’s just a Little, I’ll change her behind your desk?” “I don’t…” I felt a nervous feeling in my stomach, but I also knew it was kind of rude to force people to smell my poopy diaper for the rest of the test. “Fine,” I said, “I have a spare diaper in my bag. Are you sure you want to?” I looked up at a tall brown-haired girl who smiled, “Sure!” The girl clambered down the steps and had me in her arms almost before I was ready. “By the way, I’m Harper,” she told me. “Carly,” I said quietly. She nearly pushed Professor Davis to move out of the way, and I was at least grateful the room had been set up like a regular lecture hall that day. That meant a large desk in the front of the room blocked the view of anyone seated in the rows. “Do you have a changing pad?” She asked me quietly as she sat me down. I blushed, but I dug through my bag and handed her the changing pad, a diaper, and some wipes. “Well, at least you’re a prepared little girl!” She patted my back, “Let’s get you out of that icky poopy diapee!” “Please keep quiet,” Professor Davis asked. “I’m just changing her diaper?” “Quietly,” he insisted. She shook her head and unfolded my changing pad, then laid me down on it before pushing the skirt up and out of the way. With a few pops, the onesie was opened up, and then she tickled my stomach for no reason. I fought back a few giggles, “Please don’t?” “Fine…” she said. “Don’t get your panties in a twist… oh, you won’t wear those,” she smirked. I couldn’t tell if she was being cruel or just trying to be funny… “Don’t quit your day job,” I groaned. A moment later, she pulled the tapes open and used the used diaper to scrape some of the muck off my butt. “Eew,” she complained a moment later, and I watched her use a baby wipe to wipe her hand up before resuming the cleanup on my bottom. She used quite a few wipes to gently but quickly clean me up. Satisfied, she rolled them up in the old diaper and taped me in the new diaper, buttoned my onesie, then sat me up and handed me the diaper. “Go throw your diapee away in the trash can and get back to your test, sweetie!” I wanted to gag as she handed me the balled-up diaper! I could see brown stains on it, and I did my best not to throw up as I walked it to a trash can by the door. I found my pack of baby wipes in my bag and wiped my hands with one before returning to resume my test. Thirty minutes later, I was grateful to have pressed submit and escaped the room from my classmates! I felt a little guilty as I passed by the trashcan and could clearly still smell the contents! +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Thanks for reading!!!! Please press the 'Like' Button and leave me a comment! The real world is hitting hard right now, and I'm hitting a lot of hours at work beyond normal right now. I'm hoping to get to some more writing on this this weekend so I can get back ahead. I'm being beaten up by my stress enough that we'll see what happens. The good thing is at one post a week I do have 16 more weeks written already, but I would prefer to return to two a week. We'll see what happens, though... Thanks for your patience and understanding!

Chapter 22: The Night Before I returned downstairs to find that Hannah had resumed watching the movie without me. Like before, she was sitting on the floor. Emma remained absorbed in her smartphone on the couch. "You were in the bathroom for a really long time," Hannah said as I took a seat behind her on the couch. Emma groaned at her cousin's lack of social etiquette, though she still didn't look up from her phone. I didn't respond at all to Hannah's comment. Anything she might think I had been doing in the bathroom was better than what I had actually been doing. I hoped that I had managed to put everything back into the suitcase exactly like I had found it, and that the pull-up I had tried out wouldn't show any signs of having been worn. I wasn't able to pay attention to the TV. It didn't matter that this was my favorite of the Harry Potter movies. I simply couldn't sit still and focus on it. The diapers I'd discovered in Hannah's suitcase both worried and intrigued me. Why was it that she would need to wear those to bed rather than the pull-ups? There was only one explanation that made sense. The pull-ups must not work well enough for her at night. There was no question from when I was holding the diaper that it had significantly more absorbent padding, but it seemed to follow that it would be more effective at absorbing urine. But I struggled to understand why that was the case. The pull-ups seemed to work perfectly fine for Hannah during the day. Or did they? When Emma had mentioned that her cousin had peed all over the couch the other day, I had simply assumed that she must have not had a pull-up on at the time. But what if that wasn't the case? What if she had been wearing the pull-up, and it hadn't been able to completely absorb the accident? Maybe those pull-ups didn't work one hundred percent of that time? What would that mean for my own fake bedwetting once my parents got the pull-ups for me? I, of course, would be wetting them, but what would happen if they leaked all over the bed? I couldn't see my parents wanting to continue getting pull-ups for me if that were to happen. They wouldn't see them as having any value if there were still wet sheets to deal with, anyway. Would I end up needing to wear diapers as well if I were to continue faking the bedwetting? And did I want to wear diapers rather than pull-ups? That was a question I didn't know the answer to at the moment. I hadn't ever remotely considered the possibility of wearing a diaper rather than a pull-up outside of the makeshift diaper I had attempted to make for myself once a couple of years back to disastrous results. Would a diaper feel as good as wearing a pull-up? Would it feel better than wearing a pull-up? That wasn't a question I could answer without having tried one on, but there hadn't been an opportunity to do so. From the windows looking out over the backyard, I could see that the rain hadn't let up a single bit. I checked my phone. The forecast said the downpour wasn't supposed to stop until sometime overnight. The movie finally came to an end. Hannah wanted to move on to the next one immediately, but not before taking another toilet break, as her watch had just gone off a couple of minutes earlier. "I need to put my foot down," Emma said, though she remained seated on the couch with her legs curled up to the side. "I'm not watching another one of these movies this weekend." Hannah was gone a lot longer than before. It was hard to tell since it was raining, but I thought I could hear the sound of someone going upstairs and walking around. When she finally returned, she didn't take kindly to Emma's decision to move on to any activity other than watching the next Harry Potter movie. Hannah stomped her feet and ran off when Emma refused to hand over the TV remote to her. Hannah returned a few minutes later with her mom, who tried to helpfully suggest that perhaps we could make some TikTok videos with Hannah instead. That seemed to test Emma's limit on wanting to do anything but watch another Harry Potter movie, but she agreed. There was still another hour or so before Mom was going to come and pick me up. We managed to get a couple of someone choreographic dance videos made that Emma promised Hannah that she would post to her account, though when Hannah went off to use the toilet again, Emma whispered to me that she was going to delete it all once Hannah was gone, saying that she didn't want to ruin the vibe on her account. The doorbell rang a few minutes later. It had to be Mom coming to pick me up. Hannah stayed behind in the living room as Emma and I went to the front door. Mom was chatting casually with Emma and Hannah's parents in the entryway when we arrived. "Are you excited about summer break?" Mom asked Emma. "I will be when Angie is back from her road trip," Emma said. "I'm looking forward to the sleepover on Maddy's birthday." Mom nodded in response to Emma's statement and shifted her gaze over to me. And just like that, I was caught. Mom wasn't supposed to have known that I'd already invited Angie and Emma to have a sleepover on my birthday next weekend. "Where's Hannah?" Emma's aunt asked. "I don't know," Emma said. "Maybe in the other room." "Can you go grab her? I'm sure she'd want to say goodbye since we're leaving early tomorrow morning." Emma trudged back off toward the living room. I caught her rolling her eyes once she was at an angle where her parents couldn't see it. A little while later, there was a loud patter of feet running along the wood floor, and Hannah sprinted around the corner. I couldn't help but once again find my eyes drifting down to her waist. As she came to a stop, her shirt lifted up briefly, giving one final half-second glimpse of the pull-up beneath her shorts. "Bye!" Hannah said with a wave at me. And just like that, she was done, having turned back around to sprint off toward the living room. We continued to make small talk about plans for the summer for a few minutes, and then it was time to head home. I closed the door behind me after getting into the passenger seat, bracing myself for an awkward conversation. Mom turned on the ignition without saying a word and watched the rear-view camera as she carefully backed out of the driveway. Once we were out on the road, the questions began. "Why does Emma think there's going to be a sleepover on your birthday?" she asked. She had me there. It was stupid bad luck that Emma had thought to say anything about that to Mom. Mom had shot down the idea of an all-nighter, and she had made it clear that she wasn't going to OK the idea of a sleepover unless the anti-bedwetting pills had worked. I really didn't want to answer Mom's question, even though it wasn't as though she likely knew the answer already. "I told Angie and Emma that a sleepover was the plan for my birthday." "Madelyn, you know that I had said that wasn't an option unless we managed to figure out what was happening with the bedwetting." I nearly did it. Even though I had planned to bring up the topic of pull-ups tomorrow, I nearly went forward with the speech I had rehearsed about how it might be good to try them. But I instead fell back on a more vague excuse. "I just figured that maybe the doctor would have something that would stop the bedwetting so I could still have the sleepover. I didn't want to tell them that I couldn't do it." "That doesn't leave a lot of time," Mom said as we turned onto the road that led back to our house. "I want to make sure any solution actually works before letting you do a sleepover. Maybe it would be best if we just postponed it. Your friends can stay until it is time to go to bed. It's not as though you'd really miss anything while being asleep." That was the last thing I wanted, especially after having already told my friends that a sleepover was going to happen. "Please don't tell them that it is canceled yet. I don't want them to think anything is wrong." Mom was silent for a bit as she pulled into the driveway and waited for the garage door to open. "That's fine for now," Mom said at last. "But if we don't find a way to deal with the bedwetting before then, it isn't going to work to have the sleepover." <><><> Another night. Another set of pills to take before bed. At least this was going to be the last time. Despite my pleas to get out of taking the pills tonight, Mom insisted that I should give it one more try before going to the doctor's appointment in the morning. "I don't want you staying up too late tonight," Mom said. "The appointment is first thing in the morning, so you need to make sure you set your alarm for eight." Great. Pills. No more water for tonight. No chance of peeing the bed this evening. And I had to get up early in the morning. I held out my hand, and she dropped the two pills onto my open palm. I grabbed a glass with a small amount of water in it from her as well. Mom watched as I popped both of the pills into my mouth. I resigned myself to the possibility of dealing with an actual headache tomorrow morning as I began to raise the glass of water to my lips. Some loud yelling in the distance – which sounded like my younger brother, Jackson – suddenly grabbed Mom's attention, as she turned around to look in the other direction. Mom's back was turned as she headed down the hallway in the direction of the tantrum that Jackson seemed to be throwing. That wasn't common behavior for him, but when it happened, it usually took both of my parents to rein my six-year-old brother in. This was my chance. I pulled the two tiny pills out of my mouth and placed them in my pocket before quickly chugging down the small glass of water. With my plans for the evening suddenly looking much more positive, I didn't throw a fuss at going to bed earlier than I normally would have on an evening during summer break. I made sure to use the toilet while my parents were helping my brother get ready for bed, making sure they would know that any bedwetting would be happening in spite of all the precautions that were being taken. I flushed the two pills down the toilet, watching carefully to make sure that they didn't resurface. The best part about having avoided taking the pills tonight was that I wasn't going to have to avoid drinking anything afterward. My mouth had been so parched the past several nights when I had gone to bed without sneaking a drink from the sports bottle I had tucked away in my bedroom. Alone in my bedroom, I raised the bottle to my lips. I couldn't believe that I was somehow actually excited about the idea of drinking lukewarm tap water. The likelihood of being able to wet myself in bed tonight allowed me to manage to set aside my disgust at the bitter taste of the water. The problem of going to bed this early was that I still had plenty of time to kill before midnight. I tapped open the web browser on my phone, trying to recall the name of the website Hannah had mentioned reading those Harry Potter fanfiction stories on. I couldn't recall the exact name, but a quick Google search of the acronym she had mentioned brought up a link to the website. I tapped on the link, and then I groaned as a new pop-up appeared on my phone, one that was unwelcome but familiar, a message that the website was blocked due to the parental restrictions on my phone. Well, that was just great. Defeated, I set my phone down on the bed. It wouldn't be the first time that an otherwise appropriate website had been mistakenly blocked by the software. If it was something Hannah had access to, I couldn't imagine that it was actually anything that bad or inappropriate. I would need to ask Dad about the website tomorrow, and he would be able to update the permissions on the parental controls like he had done for me before, though perhaps I should consider coming up with a reason for wanting to access the website other than wanting to read Harry Potter stories. A sense of melancholy struck me as midnight approached. This might be the last time of wetting myself like this. Going forward, I would be wearing a pull-up to bed every night for the foreseeable future. I had first wet the bed nine nights ago. And tomorrow I would be going to see a doctor. I was amazed at how quickly everything had progressed. I'd tried to put off thinking about what the doctor's appointment might mean for me in the morning. What tests would they end up running? What theories would they have for why the bedwetting might be happening? Was there anything I had done that might cause them to suspect that I was actually wetting the bed on purpose? One thing was clear. Regardless of what happened at that appointment, I was going to need to find a way to broach the topic of pull-ups with Mom tomorrow. With any luck, tomorrow night, I'd be going to bed while wearing a pull-up identical to the one of Hannah's that I had tried out earlier today. Having managed to avoid taking the anti-bedwetting pills, I didn't have to struggle at all to manage to wet the bed, and I took in the sensation of the warmth spreading beneath my waist. Even though everything had gone right so far, even though I was still completely on track for my plan to succeed, another thought began to fill me with a new worry as I lay on top of my thoroughly soaked bedding. What if the pull-ups didn't work for me? --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Chapter 24: The Only Other Option I hated everything about going to the doctor. I tried to avoid thinking about what this doctor’s appointment was going to entail as I got ready for the day, but nothing I did was able to prevent my thoughts from drifting back to the subject. There were the normal fears: needles, all the ways I’d be poked and prodded, the way that the general atmosphere of the hospital always seemed to unnerve me. But there were also some fears that were specific to this occasion: I had successfully tricked my parents and older sister into believing that I was genuinely wetting the bed. But what would happen when my situation was examined by a professional? I had a sudden fear that they would be able to see right through the façade. Could there be something about the way I had gone about faking my bedwetting that would clue a doctor into the fact that it was all a lie? The one good thing was that I wouldn’t be needing to take those anti-bedwetting pills anymore. It shouldn’t have taken as long as four days to convince Mom to give up on them, but when she got me out of bed this morning, the sight different sheets than I had on the bed the night before was all the confirmation she needed that I had wet the bed and changed my sheets overnight. I didn’t bother with faking a headache this morning. And I didn’t have an actual one, as I’d managed to fake taking the pills the night before. I fiddled around with my breakfast as Mom focused on getting Jackson ready for his first day at his summer camp, sipping on a glass of orange juice while nibbling on a piece of toast with cinnamon butter on it. In the background, Mom was chasing Jackson around, prodding him to finish getting dressed and packed. I wasn’t normally all that enthusiastic about breakfast, but today, I didn’t feel hungry at all. My stomach felt all jittery, and while the upcoming appointment was weighing heavily on my mind, it wasn’t the only thing that was making me nervous. I was going to have to bring up the topic of pull-ups with my parents soon. I couldn’t hold off for much longer, not if I wanted to avoid having the birthday sleepover get canceled. I stared down at the kitchen table. There wasn’t any way I could eat anymore. I went to dispose of my half-eaten breakfast. I dumped my half-piece of toast in the trash, but Mom caught sight of what I was doing before I could pour out the rest of my orange juice in the sink. “Madelyn,” Mom said. “You need to finish your orange juice.” I paused with the glass of orange juice held over the sink. “But I’m not thirsty.” “I poured a full glass for you because Dr. Mathorn said he wanted to make sure that you were hydrated for the appointment. Now, please finish it because we need to be out the door in a few minutes.” I retreated from the sink and finished the orange juice, as Mom had asked. Why would Dr. Mathorn care how much I had to drink for breakfast? <><><> It was a bit of a relief that we had to drop Jackson off first before we needed to be at the hospital for my appointment. I sat in the car while Mom took Jackson inside to drop him off at his all-day summer daycare camp. I remembered the summers when I had been forced to do that every day. Sometimes, it had been fun. We took cool field trips to museums or amusement parks. But there had been plenty of other times when I had been forced to take part in group games or activities that I had no interest in. I’d rather be at the park playing soccer with my friends or curled up at home reading a book. “We’ll be at the hospital in about ten minutes,” Mom said once she got back in the car. “It will be in plenty of time before your appointment.” The silence in the car as the ride to the hospital began was deafening. On any drive longer than a few minutes, Mom typically had music playing, usually from some musical. Today there wasn’t anything coming out of the speakers. I thought it perhaps was because she wanted to talk about the upcoming appointment, but the next few minutes instead passed by in silence as I texted my friends. I mentioned that I had a doctor’s appointment I had to go to, mostly because I wanted someone I could complain about it to, though I played it off as a standard check-up. Both Angie and Emma were also excited to hear the news that I was allowed to stay home by myself during the summer, but disappointed by the restrictions my parents had still placed on me. Emma texted, asking if she could come over after lunch to hang out. I promised Emma that I would ask, though I didn’t think I was going to like the answer. “Can Emma come over after lunch? Please?” As happy as I was that my parents were now entrusting me with the responsibility of being able to stay home during the summer by myself, there were a couple of downsides to it, namely the fact that I wasn’t supposed to have anyone over or be at my friend’s place without their parents or adult siblings around. That wasn’t to say that I wasn’t going to enjoy my time alone. Between having as much time as I wanted to read Harry Potter without being accosted about the lack of diversity in my reading habits and being able to have more chances to experiment with wetting my pants, there was plenty to occupy my time. “That’s not going to work today,” Mom said. “Your sister is going to be gone all afternoon, and I’m heading off to work once the appointment is over. I wasn’t intending to take the whole day off.” “But Mom, that’s going to be boring. Can’t my friends at least come over some of the time? That can’t be any worse than letting me have the house to myself?” “We’ll see how the first few weeks go,” Mom said. “Then your dad and I could perhaps talk it over and see if that might be allowed.” I resisted the urge to argue further. That was probably as much of a concession as I was going to get. I passed on the bad news to Emma and received a bunch of sad-faced emojis in response. <><><> The last time I had seen our pediatrician had been at the start of the last school year, when I had gone through my normal physical required for the soccer teams I played on and had also gotten up to date on my shots. The only good thing about that last appointment was that Dr. Mathorn had reassured me that it would be several more years before I would need any additional vaccinations. That was far enough away that I didn’t need to worry about it for now. I took a seat in the waiting room as Mom got in line to get me checked in. We had arrived about twenty minutes early. I scanned the magazines stacked on the table next to me, trying to guess which one might have some ads for diapers or pull-ups. After flicking through the pile of magazines, I came across a parenting one. I looked over to where Mom was standing in a long line. I had plenty of time to browse and then put it down before she got back. I did manage to come across a few advertisements for baby diapers, which had me reflect again on the strange white diapers I had discovered in Hannah’s suitcase, ones that had two tabs on each side rather than one, but there weren’t any ads for the bedwetting pull-ups. I did stumble across an article discussing late potty training, but unfortunately, there wasn’t enough time to read it, as I could see out of the corner of my eye that Mom was at the front of the line. I reluctantly set the magazine down and pulled my phone out of my pocket. Mom came down to sit beside me a minute later, grabbing the same parenting magazine that I had previously been reading. I waited anxiously as a nurse occasionally stepped out of a door and called someone’s name. I breathed a short sigh of relief each time it wasn’t mine. I was so not ready for this. After about ten minutes, the nurse again stepped out into the waiting area. “Madelyn?” <><><> The first parts of the appointment were no different from past check-ups. I was weighed and had my height measured. I was a little disappointed to find that I wasn’t five feet tall just yet. I still had another inch to go for that. And according to the scale, I weighed ninety-six pounds. Then there was the exam room to deal with. The nurse led Mom and me in and had me take a seat on the paper-covered exam table. She listened to my heartbeat and then took my blood pressure with that uncomfortable cuff that went around my arm. Nothing was said yet about the reason for the visit while all these tests were underway. I sat silently while the nurse types some details into a computer. “I’m going to go and grab Dr. Mathorn for you,” the nurse said. “She’ll be with you shortly.” Then, it was just Mom and me in the room together. She was sitting in a plastic chair off to the side while I remained at the exam table. Mom gave me a reassuring smile as I looked over at her. I tried to mentally prepare myself for Dr. Mathorn’s arrival. I couldn’t have her thinking in any way that the bedwetting might not be genuine. I nearly slid off of the exam table in surprise as the door to the exam room swung open without a knock. I smiled nervously as we all exchange some pleasantries. Dr. Mathorn took a seat in front of a computer and pulled up a chart with my medical history. “I see you are going to be turning thirteen this weekend, about to be a teenager. That’s so cool. You have something fun planned for your birthday?” The difficulties I often had with lying hit me right there. “I was wanting to have a sleepover…” My voice trailed off. While that still was my plan for the coming weekend, sleepovers weren’t something that bedwetters went to typically, at least not in my family, and certainly not without something like medication or pull-ups to keep the issue hidden and managed. “Of course,” Dr. Mathorn said. “I can see why that would be more of a challenge. Your mom did talk with me about the reason for this visit.” I winced as I bit my lip a little too hard in nervous anticipation of what she was about to say next. “Your mom mentioned that you’ve had some recent issues with bedwetting. Is that right?” There was no need to fake how embarrassing and humiliating that question was, but that was the price I had agreed to pay in order to get those pull-ups. I tried to conjure the feeling of the pull-up from Hannah’s suitcase. I had worn it just the day before. If I could just get those pull-ups for myself, all of this humiliation would be worth it. I couldn’t bring myself to say anything in response. I looked down at my lap and nodded. Mom saved me the difficulty of needing to give a full update on the status of my recent bedwetting. She filled Dr. Mathorn in on all the details: when the first bedwetting accident had happened, how frequently it had been since then, the unsuccessful attempts they had taken so far to try to get the accidents to stop, our family’s history of bedwetting. I finally managed to look up about halfway through Mom’s speech. Dr. Mathorn was just nodding along as Mom talked, as though the subject of bedwetting was something she came across on an everyday basis. Dr. Mathorn turned to me once again after Mom had finished with her very thorough explanation of the past week-and-a-half of my bedwetting. “Plenty of kids wet the bed – even some adults,” Dr. Mathorn said. “Even though it is more common in elementary age kids, it still does happen with kids around your age as well.” Next came a whole litany of questions for me: Did it hurt at all when I peed? Had the color of my urine changed at all? Had I had any accidents in the day or had any times when it felt like I had to urgently rush off to the toilet? Was I waking up a lot at night? How much was I drinking before bed? Was I having trouble falling asleep? Had I been happy at school? I answered all the questions as truthfully as I could, even the ones that didn’t seem to make all that much sense. It wouldn’t do to get caught in any unnecessary lies, but so far, the questions, if a little awkward, had been pretty straightforward to answer. Still, I found that I wasn’t quite able to meet Dr. Mathorn’s eyes as I answered all of her questions. The gentle interrogation continued for a few more minutes before arriving at a surprising – an even more awkward – question than the ones that had pertained directly to the bedwetting and my peeing habits. “From my notes from your last visit, you hadn’t gotten your first period yet. Has that changed?” “Um.” It wasn’t as though I didn’t know what Dr. Mathorn meant. My health class the year before had provided way more information than I would have wanted to know, and I figured that a little more than half of the girls on my soccer team had to deal with that affliction that came from growing older. “No,” I said at last, followed by the only question that came to mind. “But why would that matter?” “That’s not something we’ll know until we’ve got all your tests taken care of. There are a lot of things that could cause bedwetting to start, and puberty – hormones and the way your body is changing – could be one possible factor.” Tests. I took a deep breath. What tests? <><><> If I had known that faking bedwetting would have resulted in needing to have my blood drawn, I might not have been brave enough to go through with it. The testing area was on the main floor of the hospital. I had trailed behind Mom on the way to it like a prisoner heading to the gallows. The worst part of it was that Dr. Mathorn seemed to have implied that there was going to be more than one blood test that would be required. At least the chair to sit in during the blood draw was comfortable. It was soft and allowed me to lean back quite a ways as I set my feet on a footrest. The nurse who would be drawing my blood rested her hand on my arm. “I’m going to need you to relax. Why don’t you look off at the picture hanging in the hallway? I’ll count down when I’m ready.” I tried to follow her advice, focusing my gaze on a painting of a mountain landscape in the distance. “Three.” “Two.” And then the needle was in. I gasped audibly as the nurse poked me. She hadn’t even waited until saying “one.” That was not fair. “You poked me early,” I protested a few seconds later after the blood draw was finished. “That’s because you were less tense then. I don’t think you’d want me to have to try again if I missed your vein the first time.” As the nurse placed a pink Band-Aid on my arm, I admitted to myself that she had a valid point. <><><> Next, it was time to pee in a cup, and I understood why I had been required to have a full glass to drink along with breakfast. That test was easy enough to pass, though it again made me worry about what would happen when my blood and urine tests came back and showed that there wasn’t anything noticeably wrong with me. What exactly were they hoping to learn from those tests? I managed to fill up the plastic cup nearly all the way with any difficulty. I’d gotten better at making my body need to go whenever I wanted to over the past week or so. I didn’t even need to hand the cup back to the nurse. There was a discreet hole in the bathroom wall to slide the cup of pee into afterward. But that wasn’t the last test. I followed Mom down a couple more hallways to the final exam room, where they did an ultrasound of my bladder. I saw some black-and-white images flash on the computer screen during the process, but I had no clue what they meant, and the technician doing the ultrasound said we’d have to wait to talk with my doctor afterward. <><><> Dr. Mathorn was waiting for us in the exam room when all the tests were finished. “We can rule one thing out right away,” she said as I once again took a seat on the exam table. I tried to decide whether that would be good news for me or not. “Some of the results we can get back right away,” Dr. Mathorn said. “The lab technicians ran a test of your urine, and it came back negative for a UTI, which isn’t too surprising since you weren’t showing any other symptoms for that. There’s a more thorough test they’ll do later that takes a few days to get results back, but I’m not expecting it to say anything different.” I tried to look relieved, as if I wasn’t completely aware of what the test result was going to show. “So, what do you think the issue might be, then?” Mom asked. Dr. Mathorn swiveled in her chair to face Mom. “There are a number of things we might look for in a situation like this, where bedwetting is starting for a teenager who hasn’t had any previous issues. We’re going to test for diabetes as well as any other medical conditions or illnesses that could be causing complications. There is your family’s medical history to consider since there is a genetic component to bedwetting. And given Maddy’s age, it could very well be an issue with hormones that may resolve itself on its own in a matter of weeks or months.” Dr. Mathorn turned to face me. I again couldn’t quite manage to look her in the eye. “I know it is frustrating, Maddy, but I don’t think we should worry about it much until we’ve got the test results back and have a better sense of what the next steps should be.” “But what should we do in the meantime? Are there other medications we could try?” Mom asked. That caused me to groan loudly. I was annoyed at how Mom kept avoiding the obvious solution, but I hadn’t intended to noticeably complain about it. “You didn’t like the pills you used the past few days?” Dr. Mathorn asked. “No, they gave me headaches, and they didn’t even work at all.” “That’s OK,” Dr. Mathorn said. “We won’t make you take those pills again. And for now, I think it would be best to wait until we get the test results back – it shouldn’t take more than a week – until we think about trying other medications.” That was it. We were back to square one. The question was now on the tip of my tongue. All I had to do was ask. Surely, pull-ups would be an acceptable choice for now if there weren’t any other options to choose from. It was so obvious that pull-ups were the right decision to handle my bedwetting at this point. Why was it so difficult for either of the adults to bring it up? I swung my legs back and forth. The exam table was tall enough that my feet didn’t come close to touching the floor. I wanted to ask the question. What was stopping me from doing it? I just couldn’t get the word “pull-ups” past my lips, so I asked something else instead. “But what about the sleepover?” Dr. Mathorn looked as though she was about to say something, but she paused as Mom answered my question first. “I think we’re just going to need to skip sleepovers for a little while,” Mom said. “I’m sure it won’t be long before you get better.” “There is something that could help with that,” Dr. Mathorn said tentatively, as if not wanting to upset me. “It’s not something you have to try, but there are other kids, some of them your age, in fact, who find that it helps to wear some protection to bed.” --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Chapter 23: The Little That I Know Three Years Ago I now knew for certain that there were no pull-ups or diapers in the house. All I had managed to find were a bunch of Jackson's old baby items, but pacifiers and bottles held no interest for me. I may have wanted to wear diapers, but I didn't have the slightest interest in behaving like or being treated as a baby. There was so much that I didn't know and very few means of attaining the information that I sought. My fixation on pull-ups ebbed and flowed for the following year after I first learned about those bedwetting pull-ups from my cousins. It wasn't as though there was any point where I didn't want to try to wear one, but without any actual ability to do so, the desire would fade out of mind for weeks or months at a time until something would occur to spark those urges again. I would catch a glimpse of an advertisement for diapers on the TV or in a newspaper. I would be at the park when a toddler would run by with the waistband of a pull-up clearly sticking out the top of their shorts. I would overhear some of my mom's friends talking about struggles they had with getting their toddlers to potty train. And then my mind would be back at it again, fruitlessly searching for information until I once again gave up hope of ever getting my hands on pull-ups of my own. <><><> My mom kept me close at hand when we went shopping for groceries. Jackson was still young enough to sit in the cart, facing Mom as she pushed it down most – but not all – of the aisles in the grocery store. To my dismay, there were a number of aisles that we never seemed to go by anymore, ones that I wished I had paid more attention to previously but that had been before I had known what I wanted to look for. Slipping off to check out the baby aisle was never an option. Mom preferred that I stay within arm's reach of her at all times. I had to make do with attempting to discreetly peek down the baby aisle as we went by, taking in its distinct scents. But it was hard to make out much from a distance. There were so many brands and styles, and I wasn't sure exactly what I was looking for. That changed one day right at the end of summer break, several months since my interest in pull-ups had begun. One of my mom's co-workers was having a baby shower for her first baby, which she was expecting in a couple of months, and Mom needed to pick out some diapers and wipes as a present. I found myself standing smack dab in the middle of the diaper section of the baby aisle, completely overwhelmed by all the options, brands, and styles. All the bright colors and smells made it hard to concentrate on what I was looking for. I needed to find something that was meant for older kids my age, not toddlers or preschoolers. There were regular diapers and pull-ups and ones that seemed to be a mix of the two. On a few of the other packages where information about the sizing was available, it was again clear that none of the products were remotely close to my size, as if that wasn't clear from the age of the models on the front of the packages. I began to wonder if that scene with my cousins a few months back had actually been real. Could it have just been something that I dreamed up in the boredom of that vacation? Then I saw a package. There was a picture of a sleeping girl on it, more than old enough to be my age. Could that be it? But then I saw the phrase "nighttime underwear" beneath the brand name. That didn't make any sense to me. Why would they be selling underwear for girls in the baby aisle? That was just plain silly. "Maddy," Mom said. "You need to keep up with us." While I wanted to see if there was any other information to glean from the package, I didn't have any choice but to obey Mom as I turned around and dashed ahead to catch up to her shopping cart. What exactly did that package mean by "nighttime underwear," and why was it located in the baby aisle close to all the diapers and pull-ups? It would be a long time before I walked through the baby aisle again. <><><> An indoor water park in the winter made for a perfect vacation. Grace was busy lying on her stomach on one of the poolside chairs. Teenagers were weird. It wasn't like she could catch a tan inside. Mom was at least reading a book while reclining in her chair. Dad was munching on some snacks, keeping an eye on Jackson and me from off in the distance. I was playing with Jackson in the kiddie pool. The warm water only came up to our ankles, but there were tons of fountains, sprinklers, slides, and water toys to play with. Above us was a bucket connected to a swivel. It gradually filled with water before tipping over and emptying its contents onto whoever might be unlucky enough to be standing beneath it at the time. Jackson found the idea hilarious. Though for him it was more amusing when the bucket of water was dropping down on my head rather than his. I knew better than to look up to try to see if the bucket was close to overflowing. I had made that mistake once and wasn't interested in making it again. At this point, my hair was already thoroughly soaked, so there was no use in fussing over yet another bucket of water pouring over it again. The small clang the bucket made as it began to tip was the only warning I got. I closed my eyes and shut my mouth as the warm water – at least it was warm water – poured over my head. I opened my eyes to the sight of Jackson giggling and pointing at me like a maniac. "OK, it's your turn now," I said. I stepped away from the spot under the basket and motion for Jackson to take my place. It seemed to take the bucket a little under a minute to refill before soaking its next victim. But my eyes drifted away from Jackson. Her top was a normal swimsuit, but around her waist was an uncovered swim diaper, blue with a picture of a mermaid on it. It was absolutely mesmerizing. Jackson yelled at me to pay attention to him, and when I looked again in the direction the girl had run off in, I had lost sight of her. I knew that I wouldn't fit in a swim diaper made for a baby, but the site of the swim diaper still stirred up that longing that had gotten tucked away for a couple of months. Since that disappointing trip through the baby aisle, my interest in diapers had dropped off. With diapers on my mind again, I couldn't help but notice them everywhere I went at the water park, and over the course of the long weekend, I spent much more time playing with Jackson than I normally would have, much to the delight of Grace and my parents. It wasn't so much that I cared to spend time around my brother, but being in the kiddie pool gave me a chance to catch glimpses of diapered kids as they splashed around in the water, wishing all the while that it was me who was wearing those diapers and pull-ups instead. <><><> I learned not to leave the room during commercial breaks. I didn't care much about the cartoon show that my brother was watching on TV. I found it difficult to concentrate on my book with all of that background noise. Ever since coming home from the water park vacation, I had been obsessed with learning as much as I could about pull-ups and diapers, and I had discovered an easy way to do so. I endured the annoying shows my younger brother watched for one, and only one, reason. The programs geared toward kids his age often featured advertisements for pull-ups and diapers. I had become familiar with the names of all the brands and the different types of pull-ups and diapers they would sell, and all the new features they were constantly adding. I peeked at the TV over the top of the book I was reading. A new commercial break had just begun. The first two advertisements were disappointments. The first was for a cereal brand I absolutely detested. The second was for baby formula. A few commercial breaks had passed by already without any of the advertisements I had been looking for, and I was beginning to wish I had just spent the morning reading in my room instead when the next ad caught my eye. One of the brands I was familiar with was advertising a new type of pull-up. A boy and a girl around Jackson's age were both going through the routine of getting ready for bed with their parent's assistance. There was the familiar scene of the closeup shot of them sliding the pull-up over their waists. And then the lights went out, and the designs on the pull-ups were glowing in the dark. But I knew by now not to get my hopes up. The kids in the advertisement were Jackson's age. No matter how cool those pull-ups looked, they weren't for me, either. The ad continued by showing how to activate the pull-ups first by holding them under a light. The advertisement was over all too soon, and Jackson's show resumed. But instead of turning back to my book, I thought over again about what I had just seen. This didn't confirm that the pull-ups I remembered my cousins' wearing were real, but it did confirm one important detail. There were pull-ups made specifically for use during the night. I wondered again about the brand of nighttime underwear that I had seen in the diaper aisle nearly half a year ago. There was a word I had learned in class the other day. It was really long, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to remember how to spell it. The concept of the word – euphemism – was also hard to grasp, and the idea that a word might not mean what it actually meant was simply too confusing. It didn't seem right. It was so much easier when people simply said exactly what they meant, rather than the opposite of it. But it was like a lightbulb had gone off in my head. Could nighttime underwear actually mean something entirely else? I tried to recall the name of the brand I had seen that day in the baby aisle. It took several minutes for it to come back to me. I had to recite the alphabet silently in my head several times before I remembered it. I whispered the name of the brand silently to myself over and over again, like a mantra. With the name of what I was looking for now in mind, I kept my eyes peeled for any glimpse of it, but several more months passed by without any additional luck. I managed to catch a glimpse or two – or at least thought I had – of the packages of so-called nighttime underwear in the baby aisle. But that was only for seconds and from a long distance, so I wasn't able to glean any more information than from the time I had spent first looking at it. My remaining options were highly limited. There was absolutely no scenario in which I would look up that brand on the family computer or tablet. I couldn't have my parents question why I was seeking out that information. I knew instinctively that they would not approve of this quest. There was no way that query would escape Dad's notice, and I had no desire for the questions that would surely follow. And despite my continued vigilance in watching ads on the TV, I never managed to come across one for that nighttime underwear. <><><> About a year had passed now since the day I had worn pull-ups My biggest fear was that I was growing. I was quite a few inches taller than a year before. I wanted to believe that they made pull-ups for teenagers, but without any direct evidence to confirm that, my worry was that I would eventually get my hands on the bedwetting pull-ups, only to find that I had done so too later and would no longer be able to fit into them. I was once again on the alert for any information I could find about that nighttime underwear brand. It was a week after my tenth birthday. To celebrate, I had gone with Emma and Angie to an indoor trampoline park. I had put the thought of those pull-ups out of my mind for a while, as I hadn't recently come across any new information. The allure of the TV advertisements had faded. It was just the same old information re-packaged in different ways. Yes, I would still look up at the TV at the familiar sound of certain jingles, but I no longer went out of the way to stay in the living room as Jackson watched the TV. The smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies wafted upward through the air and to the second floor of the house. I followed the irresistible scent downstairs as it grew stronger and stronger until I came across a bunch of cookies spread out on old pages of yesterday's newspaper on the dining room table. To my disappointment, my parents only got the newspaper on Sunday. Mom said the only reasons she got it at all was for the advertisements that came tucked inside it, though all I cared about was pulling out the comics section from the middle, often wishing that I would be able to get the comics from the middle of the week as well. Mom was in the kitchen, putting one final batch of cookies in the oven. She gave me permission to eat two – and only two – cookies. I stared down at the newspaper pages as I tried to determine which two cookies were the biggest. None of the newspaper articles carried any interest to me. Reading the news was something that adults did. However, the newspaper pages also included a section with advertisements for the local grocery store that Mom preferred to shop at. There were ads for a variety of baby products. I glanced over at them, not really expecting to learn anything that I already didn't know. There were headings for different products that were on sale: wipes, formula, diapers, and pull-ups. I turned my attention to the images in the pull-up sections, which, according to the ad, were on sale for fifteen percent off this week. And there it was. The picture was tiny, but unmistakable. It was the same package of nighttime underwear that I had come across so long ago in the grocery store. And there was no mistaking what it actually was. It couldn't have been an accident that it had been listed in the pull-ups section. I squinted down at the newspaper as I removed a couple of cookies and put them on my plate. There was some tiny writing on the package, but it was indecipherable with how small the picture was. The text next to the advertisement said that the sale included small through extra-large sizes, but I knew better than to let that phrase get my hopes up. I had seen a couple of ads for extra-large pull-ups before, only to find that this just meant they were for preschool-age kids and not toddlers. I poured myself a glass of milk in the kitchen and slowly ate my cookie while considering this new revelation. I realized that the most important thing I had learned wasn't that these nighttime underwear were actually pull-ups. That was a discovery I had made on my own a few months back. No, what I realized was that there was another potential untapped source of information about these pull-ups. From then on, I made sure to skim through all the advertisements in the newspaper. These special bedwetting pull-ups didn't show up often, but each time they did, the same problem remained as before. The information contained in the ads was minimal, with nothing to suggest whether I would still be able to fit into these pull-ups or if I had already outgrown them in the past year. There wasn't any information about the weight ranges or clothing sizes that the pull-ups would fit. But with the confirmation that these pull-ups existed, I found it impossible to put the topic out of my mind. After that moment, not a single day passed where I didn't think about what it would be like to be wearing a pull-up once again. But actually getting my hands on one of those pull-ups seemed like an impossibility for the time being. It wasn't likely that I would be visiting those cousins anytime again soon, and I didn't know of a single other kid my age who was a bedwetter. It was time to take matters into my own hands. If I couldn't get a diaper of my own, perhaps I could make one for myself. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

The next couple of days were remarkably normal. All three of the roommates stayed very focused on their coursework and social activities. Poor Teddy, unfortunately, had to do so with a very sore backside. He was still fidgeting in class on Wednesday night. The swelling had subsided, but the bruises were deep and unrelenting. And the crappy classroom chairs were less than forgiving. Towards the end of class, Ted winced as he shifted in his seat. Looking up, he saw Ashley staring daggers at him from across the room. Blushing he looked down at his laptop and furiously pretended to take notes. He looked up a moment later to find Ashley still staring at him. He tried to remain still, but there was just no way of sitting comfortably with such a sore bottom. He wasn’t sure why, but Ted felt certain that Ashley could tell exactly what was going on. When class ended, he bolted for the door, to avoid an awkward confrontation with Ashley, and he nearly ran all the way home. --- Earlier that same evening back on Columbia Ave., Lara eagerly opened a box that had arrived that afternoon. She tore at the tape and dumped the contents on her bed. Her mouth fell open. Before her was a bag of large diapers in pastel blue, adorned with a cute repeating print featuring baby bottles, pacifiers, teddy bears, and diaper pins. They looked just like baby diapers. Only they weren’t for babies. These diapers were huge, sized to fit an adult. Definitely the just right size for her friend Teddy. Lara giggled, then aggressively tore open the plastic packaging. Finally getting her hands on one of the oversized Pampers, she marveled at it, squeezing the diaper and unfolding it. “It’s so thick!” she mused in her head, happy she had opted for a brand billed as “overnights.” Needing a reference point, she grabbed on of the Goodnites from under her bed, Lara lay the two garments side by side. There was absolutely no comparison. The bigger diaper several times bulkier than the pull-up. It was obviously far more appropriate for the type of accident Teddy had on Saturday night. Lara slid her hand down her pants as she began to imagine Ted clad in the puffy blue diaper… Her fingers found the target as she visualized his thickly diapered bottom upturned and over her knee… She rubbed herself as she pictured him standing in the corner sucking on a pacifier… “Pacifier!” Lara’s eyes shot open as she whispered the word aloud. She hurried to her desk, opening her laptop to retrieve the search history from Sunday night. Keeping one hand between her legs, Lara worked the mouse with her other. She greedily filled her online shopping cart with every item that caught her eye - onesies, footie pajamas, cute diaper covers, pacifiers, bibs - all in Teddy’s size. A sudden tap on the door made her jump. Lara slammed her laptop closed and pulled her hand from her pants just as Stacey opened the door. “Hey La, you in here?” “Oh… ahem.. uh yeah,” stammered Lara. “What the…” Stacey gawked at the open bag of diapers on Lara’s bed. “What…” Lara’s mouth went dry. She was flustered, embarrassed, and still aroused. Stacey picked up a diaper from the bed. She erupted in laughter. “Baahaha! What the hell!!” Lara laughed, a little nervously. “Where did you get these?” Stacey said, holding up the diaper and wiping her eyes. Lara shrugged, trying to look innocent. “Ha… internet,” she said, hooking a thumb casually at her laptop. She did a double take, wishing she hadn’t called attention there. “Oh man,” Stacey kept laughing. “You weren’t kidding about getting him something thicker.” She squeezed the diaper, sizing up its bulk. “I just started poking around online, and came across these. I couldn’t resist…” Lara trailed off a bit, again nervously looking over at her computer. Stacey picked up on it this time. She looked over at the laptop, back at the diaper in her hand, then at the bed. She dropped the diaper on the bed and picked up the Goodnite. Eying the pull-up momentarily, Stacey quickly looked back over at Lara. Lara crossed her legs and her face went pale. “What were you just doing when I came in here?” Stacey asked directly. “I wasss just on my um computer,” Lara said, failing to sound confident. “Doing…?” The color returned to Lara’s cheeks in full. She felt them flush as she looked at the floor. “I was um… you know,” she smiled nervously and nodded toward her crotch. Lara didn’t mind admitting to masturbating. She and Stacey had always been open and positive about their sexuality. Self love was not among the spankable offenses in the house rules. “I see,” said Stacey, tapping the pull-up against her palm. “And I assume that means all your homework is done?” Lara fidgeted and look at the floor. Masturbating while putting off school work was, in fact, a spankable offense. But just a hand spanking. A quick warmup as a reminder to get back on track. “No… it’s not done yet,” Lara said, in her best broody teen voice. “Here I was coming to say that I thought we could skip our Wednesday appointment this week,” Stacey chided. “Ugh.. fine, let’s get it over with.” Lara stood and approached the bed. “Yeah, you get yourself over my lap. And while I spank you, you can tell me more about these hilarious diapers,” said Stacey. “And… maybe you can tell me why I see a couple of these Goodnites in your trash can?” She tossed the pull-up back on the bed and sat down. Lara blushed as she bent over her friend’s knee. Relieved to be able to hide her face, she thought back to how she had been enjoying her Goodnites the last few days, just as she had on Sunday night. It was a turn on to be sure, but she wasn’t exactly eager about admitting as much to her roommate. Still, as she felt Stacey bare her butt, Lara knew better than to lie about it. Lara yelped as sharp smack landed on her naked bottom. “So…?” Stacey asked as she spanked her friend again. “When you suggested we get a pack of pink training pants, they were for you, huh? Not for Teddy?” “Well… they were gonna be for him…” Lara hesitated. “Ow!” She yelped as Stacey landed a hard smack. “But I decided to try one on the other night and… ow!!” Stacey started spanking in earnest. “And it felt good?” “Ohh! Ow! Uh.. yeah… ow! Yeah it kinda uh… oww!! It turned me on!” “I see,” said Stacey, pausing momentarily and resting her hand on Lara’s pink cheeks. “And these big baby diapers? Will you be trying these on too?” Lara felt a wave of indignation. “No way! Those are just for that little bed wetter downstairs.” Stacey laughed. “If you say so.” She resumed the spanking, warming Lara’s cheeks evenly. “Either way,” Stacey lectured, “you should know better than to have any naughty playtime in your little pull-ups before your homework is all done.” “I know…” pouted Lara. She lay still, taking her punishment. There was only a mild sting, and she began enjoying the warmth that grew in her butt and spread to her crotch. Stacey paused and rubbed Lara’s rosy backside. “Alright, I think that’s enough.” But she held Lara in place across her lap. “Although, I have been thinking…” Lara whipped her head around, suddenly very concerned for her exposed rear end. “What??” she demanded. Stacey continued rubbing, furthering stimulating Lara’s arousal. “Well… I think maybe, what we did to Ted… it was just a little,” she hesitated searching for the right word. She settled on, “unfair.” Lara wriggled a little on Stacey’s lap, attempting to stand. Stacey held her in place and spanked her once. “Ow hey! Speaking of unfair…” Lara fumed. Stacey ignored her protest and just continued with her line of thinking. “I mean, he definitely got what he deserved. It was his choice to go through with the party. And he suffered the appropriate consequences.” Stacey tightened her grip around Lara’s waist, resting her free hand on her thighs. “But we set him up. We’re at least partially responsible.” “So… what exactly are you saying?” Lara had a pretty clear idea of where Stacey was going with this, and she didn’t like it. But she wasn’t in much of a position to argue, still bent over Stacey’s knee. “I’m saying I feel guilty about what we did,” retorted Stacey. “And,” she continued, with three gentle swats to Lara’s butt, “I should think you likely feel the same.” It was definitely more a statement than a question. Lara took a moment to think. As much as she was enjoying tormenting Teddy, as much as it turned her on, there was no denying that Stacey was right. They had acted cruelly toward their friend, and had yet to face any consequences. “Ugh… you’re right,” Lara groaned, her tone again resembling a troublesome teenager. “So what’s our punishment?” “Well, we were only half responsible, if that…” Stacey said. She had clearly given this some thought. “I think the strap is appropriate. Maybe half a strapping? Three strokes each?” Again, Lara wanted to protest. But Stacey’s grip around her waist seemed to keep tightening, and her tone was very authoritative. As the more dominant of the two, Stacey’s word was usually law, and Lara knew it. Lara sighed. “Fine…” she begrudged. “Good,” Stacey said as she smacked Lara’s bottom hard. She stood her up and handed her the pull-up. “Why don’t you finish up with whatever … ahem … I interrupted, then meet me in my room for a real Wednesday appointment.” Lara blushed as she took the pull-up. She felt so small, with her pants around her ankles, her rosy bottom exposed, a thin diaper in her hand. It was strange and embarrassing, but arousing. A smile curled in the corners of her mouth. Stacey spanked her one more time as she turned to leave. “Oh and keep that little diaper on when your done. I wanna see how cute it looks on you.” Lara just panted. She waited for the door to close, then slipped on the Goodnite and got back to business.

With the traumatic escape room finished Sam and her friends go back to the lodge. But what has the day's events done to their relationships? --- My writing is my passion and my income. I'm only able to write as much as I do because of the wonderful support from my subscribers. With the ABDL purge on Patreon hurting my income dramatically I have set up a couple of alternatives. If you enjoy my work and want to support me there has never been a time where I need it more. For $5 you can see every update to my stories one week before anyone else and for $10 you get early access PLUS access to 50+ stories EXCLUSIVE to subscribers. There are other rewards and tiers available including discounted commissions. To find out more please consider visiting one of my subscription sites. Prices, rewards and everything else are the same across both https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy Thank you for reading and supporting me and my work ❤️ --- They walked back to the lodge. To be more precise Amy, Chrissy and Nina walked back to the lodge. Sam spent the whole trip in Nina’s arms and despite the embarrassment she still occasionally felt there was no place in the world she would rather be. By the time they were at the front door Sam was leaning forward with her head resting against Nina. There were no plans for the rest of the day other than hanging out and having fun. The girls all retired to their rooms to chill out for a while. Sam was placed on Nina’s bed, the taller woman then laid flopped down and laid on her back. After a second of hesitation Sam crawled next to her and curled up between her body and her arm. “I think I’m going to have a nap.” Sam said with a yawn. “Sure, I’ll be out of your hair in a minute.” Nina said. She went to stand up but Sam reached an arm across her, the message was received and Nina laid back down again. In silence the two women cuddled for a few more minutes before Nina sat up. Sam was already half asleep and with the free space Sam slid up the bed. She felt the warmth of where Nina had been laying, she could smell her intoxicating smell. “Have a good rest.” Nina said. Sam slipped under the covers which Nina pulled up and over her. Sam smiled as Nina stayed another couple of seconds to look down at her. Finally she turned away and Sam was left alone in the bedroom, she very quickly fell asleep. When Sam woke up ninety minutes later her first thoughts were of pure panic. For several long moments she replayed the morning in her head and felt embarrassed by everything that had happened. She cringed under the covers and wondered how she kept letting this happen, how she kept thinking it was OK to act like a child. But then she remembered Nina’s reactions to it all, how she had helped and made Sam feel so much better about everything that had happened. She slowly emerged from her cover feeling happier. Nina was right. Normal was overrated and if she could accept Sam for who she was perhaps Sam should be more honest with herself. Sam pulled the covers down. Having napped in her clothes she was feeling rather warm so she lowered herself down off the bed and undressed down to her diaper. It crinkled comfortingly around her waist as she walked around to her clothes, she was about to pull out some new things to wear when she paused and looked into the mirror. With her diaper on display Sam didn’t feel the expected embarrassment. Instead it felt… normal. It felt like that was how she was supposed to be dressed. She felt safe and secure, a lot of the anxieties she often had seemed to fade away. She went back to the clothes she had just taken off and put her shirt back on. Leaving her skirt on the floor she walked to the door and after a last minute wobble pulled the handle and opened it. Sam heard the other three talking but as the door swung open they stopped. Sam’s heart was hammering as she waddled out of the bedroom with her baby diaper on full display. The shirt covered the top of the waistband but most of the rest was completely open. Sam could see the girls looking shocked as she walked around the couch. “Hey, Sam…” Chrissy said with a frown. “Hello.” Sam replied. She acted as if nothing was unusual about this. Unlike the other two Nina was smiling and leaned down to help Sam up on to the couch. It seemed like the more Sam accepted her limitations and the diapers she was now wearing constantly the more confident Nina was becoming. Sam sat on the couch with her legs crossed leaving her diaper a little more hidden. After staring for a few seconds Amy and Chrissy looked at each other and then back to the television they were watching. After the initial awkwardness things started to settle down. Before long the four of them were talking and laughing as usual. After watching a film they played a board game and by the end of that it was like Sam had always openly been in diapers, no one paid it any attention. “What are we doing for dinner?” Nina asked as the afternoon turned to evening. “I’ll order in some burgers.” Chrissy said as she picked up her phone. No one was going to complain and about half an hour later the doorbell rang as the food arrived. Chrissy went to pick it up whilst the others started for the table. Sam dropped off the edge of the seat and felt like she needed to pee, she didn’t even hesitate. Standing suddenly still Sam relaxed and instantly felt warmth spreading throughout the padding. She closed her eyes as a small smile crossed her face. It was a feeling Sam had quickly learnt to enjoy. When she pushed aside all of her emotions she could concentrate on the pure physical sensations. The relief of emptying her bladder, the feeling of the padding expanding, the warmth spreading from front to back, it all felt really nice. Sam slowly opened her eyes and saw Nina was watching her with her eyebrows raised. Sam ducked her head like a puppy being caught doing something naughty. When she looked back up she saw Nina give her a quick smile and head to the table. The smile made Sam’s heart melt. Unlike any of the other times she had used her diaper there was no doubting that this wasn’t an accident. The bathroom was right there and completely unoccupied but Sam had chosen not to use it. She could pretend she wet herself to avoid wasting the diaper but that would’ve been a lie and she didn’t think anyone would buy it. As Chrissy walked back in with the food Sam hurried across to the table. The expanded disposable rubbed against her thighs with every step, she didn’t know how obvious it was that she had wet herself but she definitely felt like she was waddling more than before. She had some difficulty climbing on to the chairs at the table until Nina helped by lifting her up, something that was becoming a very common occurrence. For the rest of the evening Sam remained openly diapered. If the others hadn’t noticed that she was wet right away they certainly did when they went back to the living room to play some more board games and watch television. Yet again, any shock Chrissy and Amy had about the wet diaper seemed to gradually disappear. Sam was struck by just how weird it was that everyone was so quick to accept all this. She wondered if her friends secretly thought she was a baby despite her protestations in the past. There was a brief flare of annoyance before she remembered how she was dressed and everything that had happened. She was in a difficult place. As much as she still wasn’t overly keen on being automatically thought of as a helpless baby just because of her size when Nina put her arm around her shoulders Sam couldn’t resist snuggling up into her as the diaper blossomed with fresh warmth. “We should probably head to bed.” Nina said a little while later. Sam had been leaning against Nina’s side and only realised she was half-asleep when she was moved slightly. She slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes. It was fully dark outside now and Sam stretched as people started tidying up the empty chip packets and candy wrappers left on the table. Nina stood up and after leaning side to side to stretch her back she turned to Sam. Without hesitation Sam smiled sleepily and lifted her hands towards her crush. Nina didn’t need much encouragement to lean forwards and lift her from the couch. Sam sighed happily as she was carried by Nina into the bedroom as if it was something they had done a thousand times before. “You’re going to need a change.” Nina said as she put Sam down on the bed. Sam quickly lowered herself off the side of the mattress as Nina started taking off her shirt and pants. She dropped to the floor and crouched on to her hands and knees with her big padded rear in the air. Sam reached under the bed and pulled out a new disposable. She noticed that the packet was nearly empty, she was shocked to consider how many diapers she must’ve gone through. Sam stood back up and turned around with her new diaper in both hands. She was clutching it so it covered the top of her chest and the bottom of her blushing face. She swallowed nervously when she saw that Nina had stripped down to just her bra and panties, she felt herself stirring within her currently soaked underwear. She was beyond beautiful. “Yes, you’re going to need that tonight.” Nina said with a wry smile. The previous Sam would’ve thrown the diaper to the ground in anger at the assertion. She would’ve refused the padding regardless of how convenient it made everything and she wouldn’t have spoken to Nina for days, maybe weeks, afterwards. But this Sam was different. Instead of descending into a furious anger Sam she instead felt herself turning to jelly. For someone reason when Nina said these things it made her feel embarrassed in a way that made her tingle. With trembling hands she extended her arms and held the diaper out towards Nina “You want me to change you?” Nina asked. She didn’t look surprised. Sam quietly nodded her head. Her cheeks blazed but she wasn’t going to deny her feelings. She did want Nina to change her, she wanted Nina to look after her completely and forever. It wasn’t anything she could vocalise though, she hadn’t grown that comfortable with herself yet. Nina reached down and took the diaper. Sam played with her fingers nervously before turning around and scrambling to climb back up on to the mattress. She struggled until she felt Nina’s hand on her soggy padding, it gave her just the added impetus she needed to get up on top of the bed. She laid down with her feet pointed at her crush and smiled nervously. This still felt so naughty. “Hard to believe tomorrow is our last full day here.” Nina said as she bent over to pull off the tapes of the wet diaper. Sam thought about Nina’s words. There was a certain fear that came with the idea of leaving Midforest. Would everything go back to how they had been before she came here? Did she WANT it to go back to how things were? Everything that had happened at Midforest felt like it was in a bubble of some kind. It didn’t feel like it was part of her real life and that as soon as the bubble burst everything would be undone. She’d go back to being ultra-defensive of her size and suggestions of being little, maybe even Nina would lose interest once they were back around other people again. Sam fretted nervously as she was placed in a fresh diaper and taken to her crib. --- If you want to find out what happens next you can do so RIGHT NOW at either of the following links: https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/lplyymi677/chapter/39d53e11-d6f4-496c-9875-8622cbb569b0 https://subscribestar.adult/posts/1275559

Sorry for the delay again. I guess I should not write checks that I can't cash when it comes to self-imposed deadlines on posting chapters that I have not even begun to write yet. I probably should have said in my first post for this story that there will be some strong language in this story at times. If I had to give this story a TV rating overall, it would be TV-M for language. Other than that, I would consider it SFW. Chapter 7 I woke the next morning to Rachael asking if I needed more morphine. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I nod yes. Rachael injected me with the syringe of morphine, and another syringe of the nausea medicine, and started my feeding tube. I turn to my left to see that both my parents are already here. My attention snaps back to Rachael saying, “Will, you have a busy day ahead of you, let’s go ahead and get you weighed and measured.” “OK,” I said. I started to slowly get out of bed and my dad was already by my side to get my I.V. situated and helped me to my feet. I felt a weakness in my legs and was struggling to move this morning more than in the past few days. My mom, seeing me struggle, asked, “Will, how do you feel this morning?” I said, “I just feel really tired and weak.” “I'm sorry you feel so bad, hopefully, the doctors at the Mayo Clinic will help you get better soon,” my Mom said. “I hope so too,” I said. We made our way to the nurse station and Rachael weighed and measured me. Before my dad could ask Rachael said, “Alright Will, you weigh a 112 pounds and are 5 foot 4 and ½ inches tall this morning;” pausing for a second, she said, “We should be getting you ready for transport in the next hour or two. I will come check on you in a little bit to flush your feeding tube and get you ready.” I slowly make it to my room with my parents on either side of me. I gingerly get back into bed as my mom plugs my I.V. pump back in for me. My mom turned to me and asked, “I was going to pack up all your belongings to bring to the Mayo Clinic with us so you don’t have to worry about it while being transported there. Is there anything other than your backpack and toiletries that I am missing?” “Besides my stuff on the table, that is everything,” I said. She said, “OK, I will make sure I have everything to bring to the other hospital for you.” I said, “Thanks, I'm going to go ahead and brush my teeth before you pack everything up.” I got back out of bed as my mom unplugged the I.V. pump again for me and slowly made my way into the bathroom. I quickly brushed my teeth and as I was brushing my teeth, I noticed that my nails were very long. Looking in my toiletry bag, I found my nail clippers and was able to get my nails down to a manageable length. I sat on the toilet seat, pulled my socks out, and saw that my toenails were in need of trimming too, and decided to trim them while I was at it. I came back out of the bathroom to my mom waiting to help me back into bed. Once getting settled in bed I watched as my mom started packing all my belongings up. My dad then spoke up saying, “Will, is there anything in particular that you want to watch on TV?” “No, not really,” I said. My dad then said, “Sports Center it is then.” I lay in bed half-heartedly watching TV and dozing in and out of consciousness. Sometime later, I was alerted to Rachael walking into the room. “Alright Will, I’m going to flush your feeding tube and disconnect your I.V. to make it easier for being transported to the Mayo Clinic,” Rachael said. I nodded and watched her flush my feeding tube, disconnect my I.V., and throw everything away. Rachael then said, “Someone should be here soon to bring you downstairs to an ambulance for transport.” I said, “OK” “Will, I hope they find out what is going on and you get better soon,” Rachael said. “Me too, sorry about the whole bathroom and pain medicine incident the other day,” I said. In a serious voice, Rachael said, “Will, that was nothing to be embarrassed about, I have to deal with a lot worse and would not be a nurse if I could not handle it.” I said, “OK, thanks for looking after me.” “Certainly Will,” Rachael said with a smile. My mom then chimed in, ”Thank you, Rachael.” “No problem, I hope you all have a better week this week than last,” Rachael said. Around 15 minutes after Rachael left, an orderly came into my room pushing a wheelchair. He asked, “Are you William Gauss?” I said, “Yes.” “OK, I’m here to bring you downstairs for transport,” he said. I nodded and slowly started getting out of bed. My parents were already up and by my side. My dad hugged me and said, “We should be at the Mayo Clinic shortly after you get there. I love you.” My mom then hugged me and with a kiss on the cheek said, “I love you, sweetheart, we will see you in a little bit.” As I was sitting down in the wheelchair I said, “I love y’all too.” My parents both waved to me as I was being wheeled out of the room. The orderly wheeled to the elevator and we rode it down to the ground floor. He then pushed through the back of the emergency department to what looked like an exit. Waiting for me at the exit was a stretcher and a tall paramedic wearing a dark blue uniform with EMS patches on the shoulders of his sleeves. As the wheelchair came to a stop he said, “You must be William Gauss, my name is Matt and I will be your ride to the Mayo Clinic.” I nodded and he and the orderly helped me out of the wheelchair and onto the stretcher. As the orderly was leaving, Matt turned to me and said, “I’m going to strap you down so we don’t have to worry about you falling off the stretcher during transport.” I nodded and Matt processed to run a strap over my sternum, my waist, and then my thighs. Matt then said, “You're all set, let's get you loaded up for transport.” He pushed me through the double doors and out into the bright Arizona sun. As my eyes adjust to the harsh light, I see the ambulance parked about 30 feet from the doors and a short Latino man also wearing a paramedic uniform walking towards us. As he met up with us he said, “My name is Ernesto and I will be your driver today.” They both loaded the stretcher into the back of the ambulance and as it was pushed all the way in I could hear and feel what must have been it locking into place. As Matt was getting into the back to sit beside me, Ernesto said, “We should have you at the Mayo Clinic in about 30 minutes, if you need anything let Matt know.” He closed the back doors and a few seconds later I could hear what must have been the front driver door opening and closing. Moments later I could feel the ambulance start moving forward. Matt turned to me and said, “Do you prefer to go by William or Will?” I said, “Will is fine.” “Alright Will, just relax and we will have you there in no time,” he said. Nodding, I relaxed my body against the restraints and let my mind wander as I felt the movement of the ambulance and the sound of the tires against the road. Sometime later, I felt the one thing that I didn’t want to feel on this trip, I had to poop. Thinking to myself ‘CRAP!’ as I turned my head to Matt. I asked, “How much longer until we get to the Mayo Clinic?” Matt said, “About 10 more minutes, is there something wrong?” “I have to go to the bathroom really bad,” I said. Matt then said, “Try and hold it if you can but if you have an accident it will be OK.” I nodded but turned my full attention to holding back my bowels. The minutes seemed to drag on as I put all of my energy into clenching my butt cheeks together. I felt the ambulance turn and with that motion, some poop slipped out; moments later the battle was lost as I felt my body force the rest of my bowels out. I could feel it spread out all over my bottom, moving up my lower back, forward in my underwear covering my genitals, and down my thighs. I turned to Matt with flushed cheeks and said, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hold it.” Matt gently placed his hand on my shoulder and with a look of concern and pity, he said, “It’s OK Will, as soon as we get to the hospital, we will help you get cleaned up.” I nodded but looked away in shame, as I lay in what felt like a gallon of pluff mud and smelled like a paper mill. A couple of minutes later, I felt the ambulance come to a stop, and moments later, Ernesto was opening the back doors. Matt hopped out the back and they both pulled the stretcher out of the back of the ambulance. Matt took over and quickly pushed me into what I imagine is the ambulance entrance to the emergency room at the Mayo Clinic. As we make our way through the double doors into a hallway, we are met with an average-height Latino woman with shoulder-length hair, in gray scrubs. With a smile, she approached us and said, “You must be William, my name is Rosie and I will be your nurse.” I just nodded and looked down at my lap. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Matt gesture to Rosie and they both stepped away to have a quiet conversation. A few moments later, Rosie walked back up to me and said, “OK Will, Matt, and I are going to take you straight to your room on the stretcher, once there, I will help you out of your clothes so you can take a shower.” I just nodded and continued to look at my lap. A second later, Matt was pushing the stretcher and following Rosie down the hallways. After a few turns and trying my best to avoid eye contact with passers-by, we arrived at an elevator. We got on the elevator and luckily it was only the three of us, but in the enclosed space, the smell was back with a vengeance. A minute later we were off the elevator and going down another hallway. After passing what I assume is a nurse’s station, I was wheeled into a room. Matt immediately started undoing the straps, while I saw Rosie place what looked to be a large incontinence bed pad on the floor beside the stretcher. Rosie and Matt then helped me off the stretcher to stand on top of the pad. Rosie said, “Matt, at the nurse’s station, is cleaning supplies and you can throw the fitted sheet away there.” Matt said, “OK, Will, I hope you feel better soon.” Matt rolled the stretcher back out of the room and shut the door behind him. Rosie then turned to me and said, “Will, your clothes are a lost cause so I’m going to cut them off of you and then help with a rough cleanup before letting you take a shower.” In a quiet voice, I said, “OK.” Rosie took some scissors out of her pocket and then cut the pants leg of my sweatpants from the waistband all the way down to the cuff. My pants were discarded in a pile between my legs and then she did the same with my underwear. She grabbed a bunch of large wet wipes and then began to wipe down my back, butt, legs, and embarrassingly my genitals too. She let my hospital gown fall back to my knees again and then said, “Let's go into the bathroom so that you can get into the shower.” I followed Rosie into the bathroom with flushed cheeks and she started the shower, then said, “Alright Will, there is soap and shampoo in the shower already, towels and washcloths are right here,” pointing to the towel rack beside the shower, “you can leave your gown on the floor and I will have another gown and socks for you on the counter waiting for you by the time you are done.” I nodded with my cheek still flushed from what was one of the most embarrassing moments of my adult life. Rosie walked out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. I immediately stripped out of the gown and threw it on the floor, then pulled my socks off and threw them on top of the gown. Testing the water with my right hand, I stepped into the shower once the temperature was warm enough. I let the water cascade down my body as I watch as slightly brown water goes down the drain. Once the water was relatively clear, I took a washcloth and soap and scrubbed my body thoroughly from the neck down. Once the soap was rinsed off, I turned the water off and grabbed a towel to dry off. Stepping out of the shower, I see that Rosie has left the new gown and socks on the counter. I put the gown on and struggled to tie the ties in the back. After finally getting the gown on right, I sit on the toilet seat lid to put on my socks. I stepped out of the bathroom to see that my parents made it here. My dad walked up to me with a pair of folded pajama bottoms and underwear, and said, “Well, I always said you were full of crap when you were a teenager, but I never meant literally.” My mom quickly shouted, “George!” Smiling at my dad trying to make light of an embarrassing situation, I said, “I'm surprised that my eyes haven’t turned brown yet.” With a chuckle, he handed me the pajamas and underwear, and I turned back around to head into the bathroom. Closing the door, I slipped on the underwear and as I was trying to guide my feet into the pajamas, I lost my balance. Like a sack of potatoes, I landed straight on my left shoulder and yelled out in pain, “MOTHERFUCKER!” As I am lying on the floor in pain, my dad comes rushing into the bathroom. “Will, are you alright!” my dad said in a scared voice. In an angry voice, I said, “Yeah, I just lost my damn balance trying to get dressed.” “Let me help you and get you into bed,” my dad said. My dad then put a hand under each of my armpits and lifted me from the floor to my feet. He then helped me pull my pajama bottoms up to my waist. We walked out of the bathroom with my dad having one of his arms wrapped around my torso, guiding me to the bed. Looking at the bed, I see that the covers are pulled back and there is an incontinence pad lying over the fitted sheet. Thinking to myself, ‘I guess they don’t want to chance it after my grand entrance,’ I get into bed and pull the covers over me, hearing a slight crinkle from the pad as I shift around to get comfortable. I looked around the hospital room and saw that it was not much different than the room at St. Luke’s. The room is a little bigger, and there is a couch that is up against the windows to my left, a recliner directly to my left that my mom is sitting in, and a straight-back chair to my right. As my dad was taking a seat on the couch, my mom said to me, “Will, I know you are not having a good day today. I just wanted to let you know that I called the math department and spoke to someone named Amy. I let her know what was going on and that you were at the Mayo Clinic. She said that she would talk to all your professors and let them know. She also told me not to worry about your assistantship either. Depending on how long it takes for you to get better, she said that we could do a medical withdrawal and you can return either this summer or fall if need be.” With a sigh of relief, I said, “OK,” pausing for a second, I asked, “What are you doing about work?” “I’m taking PTO right now, but if I have to, I can file for FMLA and get up to 12 weeks off. But don’t worry about me and since your father retired early last year, we plan on staying here until you are better. I already got Stanley to check on the house for us and get the mail. Just worry about you right now. OK,” my mom said. “OK,” I said. A few minutes later, Rosie walked in carrying a bag of fluids, a bag for my feeding tube, and a couple of syringes. Setting everything down on a small table to my left, she said, “Will, I’m going to start your noon feeding and start you back on fluids. How are your pain levels right now?” “The morphine is starting to wear off and it probably doesn’t help that I fell on my shoulder early,” I said. With a look of concern, she said, “You fell, what were you doing to fall?” I said, “I was trying to get dressed and lost my balance.” She then said, “I will be right back,” and walked out of the room. A minute later, Rosie was walking back in. “Will, with you falling earlier, I am going to have to classify you as a fall-risk patient. Can I see your left hand?” I held out my left hand and Rosie put a bright yellow plastic bracelet around my wrist with the words ‘FALL RISK’ written boldly on it. Rosie then said, “Please make sure someone is with you anytime you need to get out of bed. If your parents are not here, please press the call button and someone will be here as soon as possible.” I said, “OK.” Rosie then turned to my parents and said, “Please make sure you help Will with getting dressed, or me or another nurse could help. We do not want him to get hurt.” My mom responded, “Of course, his father will help from now on.” Rosie turned her attention back to the table of supplies and started to hang the I.V. fluid bag and feeding bag. She hooked the fluids to my I.V. and connected the feeding bag to my feeding tube. She then took the two syringes and injected them into my I.V. After throwing the two empty syringes away, Rosie said, “Your team of doctors should be seeing you in a couple of hours. Let me know if you need anything in the meantime.” On that note she walked out of the room and with the morphine taking full effect, I fell asleep. I woke up to my mom lightly shaking my shoulder and saying, “The doctors are here to see you.” I look at the foot of my bed and see three doctors. The first one is a woman who looks to be in her late thirties with long blonde hair and blue eyes. The second doctor is a tall man in his early forties, that looks to be Indian with short black hair and brown eyes. The third doctor is a short man with balding brown hair and brown eyes, that looks to be in his fifties. The Indian doctor spoke first and said, “I’m Dr. Kutner and I specialize in diagnostic medicine.” Pointing to the woman on his right, he said, “This is Dr. Cameron and she specializes in autoimmune diseases.” Pointing to the man on his left, he said, “And this is Dr. Taub and he specializes in genetics.” Dr. Cameron then asked, “Will, we have been reviewing your case and would like for you to go over your symptoms with us again.” I then spend the next ten minutes going over all my symptoms and what has happened to me over the past week. Dr. Kutner then said, “I'm going to do a physical exam of you, is that alright?” I said, “Sure.” He proceeded to listen to my heart and lungs and poke and prod all over my body. At the same time, Dr. Taub turned to my parents and said, “You all must be Will’s parents?” My mom responded, “Yes I’m Elana, and this is his father, George.” Dr. Taub said, “I wish we could be meeting under better circumstances, but it is nice to meet you all.” Dr. Kutner, now finishing his exam, stepped back and said, “Will, I not seeing anything abnormal in your physical exam and your lymph nodes feel normal which confirms that we are still most likely not dealing with an infection.” My dad asked, “What is the plan for figuring this out?” Dr. Kutner said, “We plan on drawing some blood samples today to begin running tests. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day for Will. He will have a full body CT scan and X-ray done, to see if anything changed since his last. He will also have an MRI of some key areas of his body and I will be performing a biopsy on a few of his joints tomorrow afternoon.” Dr. Cameron followed up with, “With the blood samples, I will start looking at other types of autoimmune diseases that Dr. Wilson could have missed and with tomorrow's tests, could shed light on which direction we should be looking in.” “With one of the blood samples, I will start sequencing Will’s DNA, and see if there are any genetic abnormalities that pop up. Hopefully, if there is anything to find, we can find it quickly, but with how large the human genome is, it could take some time,” Dr Taub said. “I will be supporting both Dr. Cameron and Dr. Taub, but I also will be exploring other avenues in trying to diagnose what is causing your symptoms. Do you have any questions?” Dr. Kutner said. I said, “No.” “Get some rest, Will, we will see you tomorrow,” Dr. Kutner replied. As they were walking out of my room, my mom said, “I feel better already after meeting the doctors.” My dad then said, “Yeah, it seems like they have a game plan together and are attacking this from all angles. How do you feel, Will?” I said, “Better, I still hope they figure this out quickly.” A moment later Rosie walked in carrying a caddy of empty vials, and what looked to be a needle and tourniquet. Walking over to the right side of my bed, she sat the caddy on the bed beside me and said, “Will, it seems that the doctors want a lot of blood samples, I’m going to draw blood from your right arm, OK.” I nodded and held out my arm and Rosie tied the tourniquet around my upper arm and began to draw vial after vial until the whole caddy was full of blood samples. After throwing the used needle and tourniquet away, Rosie said, “That should be the last of the blood samples that they would need today. I will be back at 6 to start the last of your feeding for the day and give you more morphine if you need it. Let me know if you need anything else before then.” Rosie walked out of my room with the caddy in hand and it did not take me long to fall back asleep. I woke up twice before the night, one to go to the bathroom with the help of my dad, and the other to get more morphine and the last feeding of the day. I fell back to sleep shortly after getting the morphine. I woke up to it being dark outside and my joints screaming in agony.

Daniel is a young man kept in permanent babyhood. When a chance discovery reveals the truth of the world and his position in it he is determined to "grow up". The question is whether his adopted mother and sister are ready to let him... --- Writing is my passion and my only source of income. If you enjoy my stories you may be interested to learn that you can see every update I post one week before the rest of the world with a $5 pledge on Patreon. For $10 you can see everything early AND 50 full length stories that can only be found on my SubscribeStar and Ream pages! The money I get goes to paying bills and putting food on the table so I appreciate all of my patrons and would appreciate anyone who might be interested in supporting me to check out my Patreon ❤️ https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy --- Training Daniel By Elfy Daniel rolled over and let out a little grunt as he stretched his legs. He could feel the diaper between his legs pushing his thighs apart, the padding was swollen from another night in his ever-present crib. Beneath him, underneath the soft cotton, a plastic sheet crackled as he moved. It was the usual noises of his nursery in the morning. “Wakey wakey, sleepyhead.” That was another familiar sound in Daniel’s nursery. It was his Mommy, Sarah. She was usually the one to wake him up in the morning which was fine with Daniel, it was preferable to his mean sister, Amber. They weren’t his real Mommy and sister, of course. Daniel’s real parents had been killed when he had been very young and it was Sarah, a friend of his biological mother who had taken him in. It had all happened when he was very little so he didn’t have any memories of his parents and his Mommy was never keen on discussing his family. Daniel slowly opened his eyes. The curtains had been opened and he was left blinking in the early morning sunlight as he adjusted to the world. The familiar white bars of his crib towered over him on all sides, above him a mobile which featured various farmyard animals wearing capes like superheroes. Beyond Daniel’s crib was his nursery. Something that hadn’t changed in his twenty years of life. It was primarily baby blue and white. His crib was on the opposite side of the room to the door, behind his head the long changing table stretched out underneath the window. On the opposite side of the room next to the door was his toys. A big chest filled with all the toys that he had accumulated, above that was the shelves filled with books for bed time. By the foot of the crib was the chest of drawers and closet filled with his clothes. “Did you have a good night?” Sarah asked as she stood on the release and lowered the side of the crib. Daniel nodded his head as he rubbed his sleepy eyes. He felt his mother leaning into the crib and instinctively spread his legs for the morning diaper check. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that he was wet. He wet in his sleep every night, it was no big deal. There was something different about today though. Normally Daniel’s diaper checks involved a quick poke and a prod but today his mom’s hand lingered. As he finished rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he looked down at his crotch. His mom’s large hand was massaging the front of the diaper, the wet padding rubbing against his skin. “Mommy?” Daniel asked in a little voice. “That’s right, baby.” Sarah smiled warmly as her hand continued to dance against the padding, “It’s your milking day.” Daniel felt his heart leap a little. He had never been taught things like the days of the week, he never really knew what the date was or even what month fell in what season, he had only really learnt a little about the time of day from watching clocks. No one had taught him things like that, things men didn’t need to know. So Daniel never really knew when his scheduled milking days were, he had to just wait until they happened. The rubbing continued until Daniel let out a little moan and then it stopped abruptly. He sighed, it was always the way. His Mommy and sister liked teasing him at the best of times but it went into overdrive when it was time for his milking. It was as frustrating as it was exciting. They had started around the time he was eighteen and continued seemingly at random ever since. It was one reason he was kind of glad he didn’t live with his actual family because it would make all this a lot weirder! A lot of that frustration was down to the “toy” that was kept almost permanently locked on to Daniel’s private parts. A rubber chastity device wrapped around his penis like a cocoon. It was flexible enough but it prevented him from getting too excited, it meant that whenever he was teased in that area he could only feel a small amount of the sensation. The clear rubber was designed to only encase his dick though, the balls underneath were left uncovered and it was that area that the two women always seemed to focus on when teasing him. By the time Sarah had finished rubbing the front of the wet diaper Daniel was feeling a lot of frustration. His poor little penis strained against its rubber prison without being able to break out. The side of the crib came rattling down and Daniel held his arms out to be picked up by his Mommy. Daniel was clutched tightly to Sarah’s chest as he was taken across to his changing table. It was a little awkward with Sarah’s large chest meaning Daniel couldn’t lay flat against his Mommy. He wrapped his legs around her middle and his arms around her neck. With a grunt of effort Sarah lifted Daniel and sat him on the edge of table. He scooted back and laid down for his inevitable diaper change. He looked out of the window as the tapes were pulled away from the shiny front landing panel. The diaper slackened in stages until the last tape came free and the padding slid down a little. Sarah then opened the diaper up to the cool air of the nursery. Daniel had gone through more diaper changes than he could count. Not that he could count particularly highly, he always started having trouble when it got to double digits and he ran out of fingers to use. Usually the next stage would be the baby wipes but today was milking day and that meant there was a slight change of plans. With a gasp Daniel felt his Mommy gently rubbing the skin of his ball sack. He was always kept completely shaved down there for hygiene reasons and his skin was baby smooth. He closed his eyes as felt his Mommy’s fingers, they were so delicate at times it was hard to feel that they were there at all but the electric excitement was always present. “Do you like that?” Sarah asked happily. Daniel nodded his head. It was embarrassing but he couldn’t deny how it made him feel. Perhaps it was because his milking days often seemed so distant to one another but every time someone touched him between his legs it felt incredible. It was no wonder men were kept in diapers, they had to keep this whole area locked away in case someone brushed past them by accident. For several minutes Daniel was left writhing on his changing table as he was fondled by his Mommy. He wondered if other men had such strict milking days like he did, maybe he was one of the lucky ones and some people didn’t get milkings at all. That would be a disaster, it was one of the things Daniel looked forwards to most. “We better get you all padded up before we have an accident on our hands.” Sarah said when she finally pulled her hand away from Daniel’s crotch. Daniel sighed. He almost felt like he could feel his balls throbbing after all the attention, he ached for more but he knew from past experience that he could only expect further teasing until the prison around his penis came off. A fresh diaper was pulled off the small shelf below the padded top. Daniel heard it crinkling as it opened and as his legs were lifted up like they weighed nothing he turned to look out the window. There were a lot of downsides to men being inherently weaker than women but they certainly made diaper changes easier. When Daniel’s hips were lowered it was on to the open padding. The familiar feeling of a thick diaper wrapped up between his legs and over his caged genitals. Sarah flattened out the plastic over Daniel’s tummy and then taped it closed. The routine continued as Daniel lifted his arms again, he was picked up and sat on the edge of the table. With one hand on his chest to stop him from falling Sarah turned to some clothes that she had prepared from the previous night that were hanging over the back of the rocking chair in the corner. “A special outfit for a special day.” Sarah said. Daniel didn’t recognise the clothing. It must’ve been new. Whilst a lot of clothing was store bought a lot of his clothing was also made by his Mommy at home, she’d grown quite good at it but this was clearly one of her creations. Firstly a t-shirt was pulled over Daniel’s head. It was plain white and not particularly notable but the shortalls that came with them were very much created at home. They had once been plain but Sarah had been doing some embroidery. Now the large chest piece, rather than being blank was stitched with the words “Baby’s Milking Day!” “Isn’t it wonderful?” Sarah said effusively as she slipped Daniel’s legs into the correct holes and put him in the infantile clothing. “Yes Mommy.” Daniel said with a smile, “Thank you.” Daniel saw his Mommy leaning down to him and he instinctively lifted his arms. He was picked up under the arms and sat on his Mommy’s hip. He yawned and rubbed his eyes as he was carried downstairs, his legs dangled uselessly as the pair of them descended the steps. With everything in the house designed for the much taller females Daniel had always seen being carried around as a lucky privilege. Trying to climb up or down these stairs would be like trying to scale a mountain. The living room was already occupied when Daniel was carried in. Amber was sat on the couch. She was a couple of years older than Daniel but the differences between them made it seem much larger. She was seven feet tall and had inherited her mother’s large breasts. She was pretty but mean, especially towards Daniel, and seemed to take great pleasure in embarrassing him whenever she got the chance. She always seemed to go even harder on milking days. “You play in your pen alright?” Sarah said as she placed Daniel into the fenced area. She walked over and turned on the television. Bright cartoons starting dancing across the screen, “I’m going to get breakfast ready.” “Yes Mommy.” Daniel replied. As Daniel settled into place in the pen he reflected on life and the society that he really didn’t see a lot of. He was small, even for a male, at five-feet tall he was towered over by his Mommy and “sister.” Women were always taller than men but in this family it seemed to run to extremes, the women were taller than average and the men were shorter. Amber was seven-feet tall and Daniel’s Mommy was eight-feet. The difference in height was only made starker because Daniel was always on the floor. He was too weak to walk and he was kept that way on purpose. He very occasionally saw men walking on television but his Mommy assured him that was the exception rather than the norm. Most men were kept weak and were treated like babies. They also seemed to be kept at home a lot, Daniel had rarely been allowed to explore beyond the backyard. Whilst Amber went to school throughout her childhood Daniel was kept at home, beyond the absolute basics like speech Daniel was kept ignorant. Daniel didn’t like the way things were if he was honest. He always felt so jealous of Amber whenever she went out with friends or to work. His days consisted of sitting around in his diapers, playing and watching cartoons. A monotonous life that was occasionally broken up by special events such as… “Milking day, huh?” Amber said with a sneer, “Lucky boy.” Daniel blushed a little and looked down at the floor. He always felt embarrassed when people brought up his “milkings” even if he looked forward to them a lot. He especially didn’t like when Amber brought it up. Amber stood up and walked around to the playpen’s gate. She helped herself inside and Daniel tried his best to ignore her presence. She walked around until she stood in front of him and put her hands on her hips. Daniel looked at some of his toys on the floor and tried not to let his sister know how he was so intimidated. It didn’t work. Just as Daniel was starting to wonder what was going to happen he felt Amber’s foot against the front of his shortalls. The foot rested on the bulging front of his diaper and he immediately winced, it didn’t hurt because Amber wasn’t putting any pressure behind it but that didn’t stop the clear threat. “It’s a good thing we keep this locked up.” Amber stated as she prodded down with her foot a couple of times, “I bet it would be going off everywhere if we didn’t.” Daniel didn’t think that was fair but all he could do was scoot backwards on his padded rear to get away from the foot. He turned away from his sister with red cheeks and looked over to a simple jigsaw puzzle. He pulled it over, anything to get away from Amber’s mocking. He couldn’t go far, of course, the bars of the playpen made sure of that. “I think I’ll go out for a walk today.” Amber said airily. She made it sound like an idle thought but Daniel knew it was aimed at him, “Maybe meet some friends and go see a movie. Ooh, I hear Damage Limitation are in town, maybe I could score some tickets…” Daniel ducked his head. One of Amber’s favourite games was taunting him by talking about what she could do and what he could not. All he could do was pout and hope his sister got bored soon. When Amber suddenly stepped up to him and reached over his shoulder he was surprised, he nearly fell over as her hand went down to his diaper and squeezed the front. “Or maybe I should stay in after all.” Amber said with a small giggle, “It is your special day after all. Who knows when the next one will be?” Daniel tried to suppress a small moan as he felt Amber’s hand rub against him. The rubber toy encasing his sensitive parts did a good job of stopping most of the sensations getting through but he could still feel the pressure. His balls in particular enjoyed rubbing against the soft and smooth padding of the inner diaper. “Ugh…” A small moan escaped Daniel’s mouth. His little man was trying to stand at attention but the toy made it difficult. It wasn’t painful but it was uncomfortable. “Breakfast is ready.” Sarah called out from the kitchen. Amber withdrew her hand. She laughed as Daniel reached out his hands to be picked up, it would be a lot better than having to crawl all the way out to the dining table. He was disappointed as Amber shook her head and walked away. Daniel scowled after her. He had no option but to get on his hands and knees and scurry out towards the kitchen. Everything was so much bigger than Daniel already but when he crawled around like this it was more pronounced than ever before. He went down the long hallway to the kitchen where Amber was already sat at the table, she was leaning back in her chair and smirking as Daniel came in. He crawled around to his highchair and waited on the floor, there was no way he could climb up into it without help. “Upsy daisy.” Sarah said as she lifted Daniel up. --- If you've enjoyed this and want to find out what happens next you can do so RIGHT NOW on the links below! https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/luzh7bq3yj/chapter/2b197e1d-bf4e-46d5-a3c2-1e93f4a6a0fa https://subscribestar.adult/posts/1268609

Chapter One Fern stood before the rich mahogany door, hand trembling as she willed herself to move. (I’m just going to look. There’s no harm in looking, right?) She rolled her eyes at herself–there was plenty of harm in looking. If her landlady caught her, Fern might find herself homeless within the hour. She didn’t expect Aurelia to be forgiving of a tenant snooping around her bedroom. Fern had found herself a good place–the shared house was practically a mansion, even if she shared it with three other women, and the rent was comfortably within her price range. She was only a ten minute jog from her new job, and her new housemates were friendly and polite. It would be the height of stupidity to risk all that for mere curiosity, and yet… … Two nights earlier “Ah-AH!” Fern jumped, alarmed by the sound. She hadn’t heard anyone come home, but at some point during her midday nap, someone had come in, and they were…screaming? Heart racing, Fern crept to her bedroom door with quick, silent strides. She was still wearing her scrubs from work, she hadn’t taken them off before crashing into her nap. Her socks on the hardwood floor didn’t make a sound, and she held her breath. Could it be a home invader? She heard a loud SMACK! and a second yelp of pain in a different register. Then a voice, loud, stern, and familiar. “I don’t want to hear it–this is what you get when you don’t listen.” Aurelia’s voice, there was no mistaking it. Fern’s landlady, the matron of the house. As confident as she was rich, Fern had never heard the woman sound uncertain about anything, but now her words carried notes of diamond, hard and unbreakable. “Please, I told Leah we shouldn’t, but,” Carolyn’s voice echoed through the house, muted by several walls but no less distinct. “I just–” SMACK! “You are responsible for your own choices, young lady!” Fern built a mental picture as she crept into the hallway, towards the door on the opposite end of the wing. Aurelia had two nieces, Leah and Carolyn, and they’d done something to upset their aunt, something that had pushed Aurelia to hurt them. (Did I rent a room from a monster?) As the smacks and cries of pain continued, Fern stepped up to the door, crouching, peering through the old-style keyhole. It only offered limited flashes of the room beyond, but she saw enough. Two round, pert butts were pointed towards her, raised in the air, displaying bright pink stripes that criss crossed over light olive skin. Heart pounding her chest, Fern could only watch. … Shaking away the memory, Fern grabbed the handle of the bedroom door and threw it open, unable to fight her curiosity any longer. She half expected to find some array of punishment devices laying around the room, but Aurelia’s bedroom seemed remarkably normal…or, at least, normal for someone with her income. A bed against one wall, a private master bath, plenty of space, a shelf stacked with well-loved books. If Fern hadn’t seen what she’d seen, she never would have suspected the truth. Only her spying told her where to look, spotting two pairs of scuff marks on the hardwood floor, pointed towards… She swallowed, eyes raising up to the bookshelf. Walking forward as though in a trance, captivated by the need to see for herself what lay beyond it, she looked over the shelf, skimming titles until she found the unique choice amongst them. Histoire d’O. The title was the only French novel, but more than that, the subject matter couldn’t be a coincidence. Hand drifting up, Fern pulled on the book with a finger. It leaned forward slightly, then the bookshelf swung away from her, revealing the secret room hidden within. … Peering through the door, Fern held her breath, straining to see. Aurelia brought down a cane onto the exposed asses of the girls. By shifting her view, Fern could see that the girls had been stripped and made to bend over, heads down so that their long brown hair dangled almost onto the floorboards, touching their toes, leaving their bare butts completely vulnerable. Aurelia stalked from side to side, striking the two girls without mercy. With every impact, Fern’s heart slammed in her chest, anticipation building. Though horrified, she couldn’t look away, needing to see every mark, every crack of the switch. She craved it. Finally, Aurelia stepped back, her voice as steady and dominant as ever. “That’s enough. Standing.” Both girls stood together, adopting similar postures, their shaking legs shoulder-width apart and their naked bodies facing their aunt. Leah moved to rub at her cheeks, to soothe the soreness, but that only earned her a crack of the switch across her knuckles. Fern caught the flash of a smirk on Carolyn’s lips, the girl’s brown eyes sparkling for just a moment before her expression returned to quiet submission. “We’ve learned our lesson,” Carolyn promised. “We shouldn’t have stayed out–” She froze, swallowing, reacting to an expression on Aurelia’s face that Fern couldn’t see. “Your lesson,” Aurelia explained, snapping her cane in her hand for emphasis, “is not over. I don’t know when Fern will be home tonight, but tomorrow night, she’s been scheduled for a double shift. We’ll have the house all to ourselves, and then we’ll see if you’ve really learned your lesson. Do you understand?” Whimpering, both girls nodded, eyes down, refusing to so much as look at their aunt. Fern swallowed, and she felt immediately that she had to know more. … Stepping forward in a daze, Fern looked at the treasures arranged in the hidden room. It was more than she’d ever imagined. Some of the implements she’d seen before, when–last night–she’d arranged to have her shift covered and snuck home to witness the girls’ promised punishment. Fern had been unable to resist the allure, the need to know, and so she’d made her way back to her peephole, silent as a mouse, to watch the punishment. Two leather benches took up the center of the room. Fern could visualize the images from the previous evening that were now burned into her memory. The outline of two girls bent over them, butts in the air, hands and ankles cuffed in place so that they could not escape their torment. Arranged so that they were opposite each other, the girls gave Fern a perfect peep show. She could see Leah’s face, her narrow brown eyes burning red, tears streaking her makeup, while Carolyn’s exposed ass demonstrated why–bruises mark the skin, a canvas for an artist who worked with paddles and floggers. They’d each been allowed a little slack in the cuffs holding one wrist, so that they could reach out, holding each other’s hands for comfort throughout the torment–their only source of respite as Aurelia struck them, again and again. One shelf was taken up purely by implements meant for spankings. A half-dozen slender canes, some willowy and flexible, others thick and hard. A rain of blows left a dozen parallel stripes of pain on Carolyn’s skin, and each mark is matched by a desperate, high yelp. In contrast, a thick, small leather tool sat all alone, one end weighed down by lead shot. Bruising impacts fell, heavy thuds that forced Leah’s body into the bench. She whimpered and begged in a throaty, desperate voice, but her aunt showed not an ounce of mercy. Heart fluttering as she looks away from the spanking tools, Fern stepped up to a tall steel stand. Two clear plastic bags hung from the top, long hoses dangling below, with valves to control water flow. Still restrained, both girls were helpless as Aurelia stalked around them, holding a pair of identical nozzles that dangled from matching enema bags. The bags sagged on the stand, full of sudsy water, so much that Fern didn’t believe it could all possibly fit inside the petite girls. “Let’s see if you can do better than last time,” she taunted, stopping behind Carolyn and plunging the tip of one nozzle deep inside. Carolyn inhaled sharply, gasping as the enema hose filled her up. Leah took it better, biting her lip and closing her eyes to brace for the penetration. They both held their bodies tight and tense. Their freshly bruising bottoms quivered, knowing that this would only be the start. “One quart each,” Aurelia said, and Fern realized only then that the girls, with their heads low and eyes downcast, couldn’t see how full the bags were. “But–” Leah began. “Shut up!” Carolyn snapped, before the other niece could get them into further trouble. Aurelia smirked and laughed. “You should listen to her, unless you both want to try the full three quarts.” “But that’s–” Leah repeated, eyes widening as she realized her mistake. Carolyn shook her head, butt wiggling slightly in the air, but she couldn’t stop the words after they’d already been said. Aurelia only smirked. “Two quarts it is. Do you want to go for three?” Both girls fell silent. Nodding, Aurelia reached up and released the nozzles. The water lines began to lower, sloshing into the girls, who whimpered as they were filled up with painful, dribbling slowness. She left the girls there, leaving for just a moment. “You brat!” Carolyn snapped, while they had a moment of semi-privacy. “I’m sorry,” Leah whimpered in response, helpless squeaks of discomfort escaping her throat as the enema filled her more and more. “I–I couldn’t help it!” Before they could say anything further, Aurelia returned with a large pitcher, making good on her threat by topping off the enema bags. “If this doesn’t help you learn,” Aurelia mused, grinning wickedly as she watched the two girls squirm and squeak, wriggling their bruised bottoms in the air as water poured into them drip by drip. “We may have to try a more enduring lesson. I wonder–would daily spankings for a week keep you both in line? Or daily enemas?” Both girls whimpered, shaking their heads. “Of course,” Aurelia said, as though they’d answered her. “It should be both! So remember–that’s what will happen if you fuck up again–and that’s if I choose to be merciful.” Back in the present, mind still half lost in the memory, Fern’s eyes fell on the rear-most shelf, and her breath fell still. Upon that shelf, in styles ranging from plain white to decorated and juvenile, were dozens–hundreds, even–of stacked adult diapers. Whimpering as they returned from the privacy of the bathroom after being allowed to release their enemas, the girls laid down, squirming but silent, onto a pair of pads on the bed. Fern’s peephole could just barely see that far to the side, letting her watch as Aurelia wrapped the squirming girls up in their diapers. “Let’s see if you’ll still stay out late wearing these,” Aurelia warned. “Or do you think nobody will notice your puffy bottoms if you go dancing in your miniskirts while wearing your diapers?” Fern moved towards the thick, puffy garments in a trance, reaching out to touch the object of her obsession,, to feel the slight plastic crinkle beneath her trembling fingertips. Near the end of the stack, a pair of handcuffs had been left out away from its home with the other restraints, sitting on one of the diapers. The contrast between the two–a juvenile object of comfort and a hard, sharp tool of bondage–left her feeling dizzy. Her gaze fell over the pair of glimmering steel handcuffs, polished to a mirror shine. She saw herself in the restraints, her own dark eyes enormous puddles of desperate need, her nut-brown skin flushed, sweat beading on her forehead. She felt as though she’d been running for miles, heart beating fast, but instead of fatigue, she wanted something, wanted to– Fern’s eyes widened further as she saw another face reflected in the cuffs, and she spun, yelping in alarm. Aurelia stood in the closet doorway, looking like a Greek goddess of vengeance. Arms on her hips, standing tall, the older woman glared fire down at the trembling Fern. “What, exactly, do you think you’re doing?” ... Written as a commission Two more chapters of this story are on their way soon! If you want to support the creation of stories like this, please consider subscribing or getting a commission. (Or both! One perk of subscription is that you get discounts on commissions!) Subscribe: https://reamstories.com/peculiarchangelingabdl https://subscribestar.adult/peculiarchangeling Commissions: https://forms.gle/3TFz11j3az6HETTBA

After being diapered off and on basically my entire life and missing the days where I'd frequently wet the bed when I was a kid, I decided to just start wearing and using premium diapers 24-7 in December 2023. I also recently started following the 12 month diaper training guide that gets mentioned here quite often and now in April 2024 I'm proud to say that I'm wetting frequently with strong sudden urges but not much comes out and also dribbling involuntarily post void. I also woke up to a wet bed last night without remembering peeing for the first time in many years and I couldn't be more proud of myself. This stage seemed to come recently and out of nowhere for me after only feeling like I needed to pee sooner than before and that was it for a long time. I'd wake up needing to pee, frustrated that my body woke itself up to do so, peed myself then went back to sleep. This is finally starting to change. So don't get discouraged or frustrated if you're trying to accomplish the same thing I have. Be patient, stay hydrated and wet yourself no matter what as soon as you feel the urge to pee. You have to act like you don't have any choice. It's a mental barrier that you must break because we were trained at a very young age that it's not okay to pee yourself. Tell yourself that it is okay even if you think you might leak. I'm Looking forward to continuing down this path and I'm looking forward to the point of no return. To those that think that it isn't possible to make yourself incontinent, my nose and sheets are saying otherwise right now...

A Done Deal Another upsetting night’s sleep – my duvet was bunched up and looked like I’d had a fight with it, the fleecy throw was caught up in some kind of jumble with my pillows and worst of all, my nappy, as it had been for the past few weeks, was soaked. A few months ago a nightmare scenario started where I was either being chased or attacked by something which I couldn’t identify but found incredibly scary. I’d fought this unknown monster, I’d done battle with an unseen force and when, after the second encounter and second soaked bed, my mother (step-mother) had demanded I wore protection until the phase (as she called it) was over, I didn’t like it. I shouted and screamed my absolute refusal, which didn’t go down well as I’d got to the stage (being fifteen) of arguing with every decision she made. That was until dad (Howard) came and ‘had a word’, which has seen me resentfully wearing a thick terry cotton nappy to bed every night since. Dad is a practical man, an intense man; he’s also a very important and busy man and has little time for ‘stupidity’. He listened to all my arguments as to why I shouldn’t wear a nappy and then slowly, but methodically, disassembled each one of my points as either being unreasonable, selfish or simply illogical. He pointed out a nappy was what I needed and so that’s what I would wear. No ifs, no buts, it was all a ‘done deal’, that mother was right and I should “just get on with it”. + My real mum had died when I was barely two years old so I don’t remember her too well but dad had remarried when I was five. He’d actually been seeing Diane for a year before he introduced us and was told that I was getting a new mummy... and new baby brother. She moved in, they married and I now share a house with my step-family of Diane, Richard, who’s nine, William who’s seven and now, eight month old twins, Jane and Alfie. My father is a good man, he’s a pathologist at a lab in the city and we’re close and although Diane is a nice lady, as I’ve gotten older, for some reason I’ve grown to resent her and my brothers and sister. I suppose, because I’m the eldest, it’s fallen to me to look out for my siblings but now I’ve had enough of baby-sitting and being, what I feel is, a general dogsbody. Dad keeps telling me it’s what I get an allowance for but I feel I do more than my fair share of... well... everything. Which I suppose is what has led me to arguing all the time because mum is always at home now with the twins so I’m expected, because dad is out at work all day and has late hours to make extra money to keep a roof over his family, to ‘step up more’. Bloody hell... I do enough around the house I barely get a moment to myself. I rarely get chance to go out because of school work and the family. My mates don’t come around any more because of the constant demand for attention from everyone. “Jason can you do this?” “Jason, can you do that?” “Jason can you do the other?” “It will only take a minute” It never does and once started there’s always something else... it never bloody ends. “While you’re there can you...” The house is a mess and all about the twins; the smell of pee and powder and if the weather’s bad clothes and washed nappies drying on radiators. Constantly being told to be ‘quiet’ because they’re sleeping and because she is always involved with them, I’m supposed to keep my two younger brothers occupied to make sure they do their homework (projects) which I also have by the way. If they need to be at football practice or some after-school activity, it’s me that has to chaperone them. The list never ends and so I don’t get much time to myself. I resent everything and everybody. + Before the nightmares began, and I suppose it linked in to when the twins arrived, I’d begun to have little accidents. What I mean is that occasionally I’d pee in my undies, not enough to cause too much trouble, like stains on my trousers or jeans, but enough for me to know I’d better change my briefs pretty soon. I kept these little accidents secret and was able to deal with the wet undies myself. However, something else seemed to be bothering me and I didn’t know why. I know that with the announcement that twins were on the way, dad, and mum to a certain extent, went into panic mode and I suppose, because I’m the eldest I noticed more than my brothers. I’m of the opinion that the twins were an accident: certainly from just how fraught the house has been since their arrival. Dad already was overloaded with work and now, with extra family to feed and clothe his life/work load is immense. I’m not sure if some of his obvious anxiety has rubbed off on me. We used to be quite a happy little bunch and dad had time for us all. Diane, was also pleasant to be around but now she just gives the impression of being constantly worn out and complains she doesn’t have the time to ‘pretty herself up’ for dad or for them to go out occasionally. As a result her attention has turned to me as the eldest to ‘help out’ but I already did that but since the twins my workload has escalated and I rarely see anyone except at school. It’s as if she’s decided that if she isn’t going to have fun and do what she wants then neither is anyone else. However, somehow with the twins came a number of new friends, mothers all, who pop around and tell Diane what a wonderful job she’s doing, what a hero she is looking after such a diverse family and that it’s quite right to expect me to step up. She’s been encouraged to be ‘the queen bee’ and we’re all there for her pleasure. Well that’s how it seems from the comments I get when they’re all around sipping tea (or sometimes a glass of wine) and complaining about their own lives and how easy men have it. Of course they often bring their kids around and so there’ll be a couple of screaming babies or tots seemingly having a breakdown. + I’m not sure if I could blame the twins on my initial wet pants but I ask myself if all this extra responsibility is the reason I’m seriously wetting at night and have to wear a nappy to keep from nightly flooding the bed. I’m fifteen so of course shouldn’t be wearing a nappy any time, which means I’m constantly in a bad mood. This is not helped by my step mum also being in a very ‘fragile’ mood, when it comes to me. If I’m in a mood, she’s in one. Of course my younger brothers are too young to take on too much responsibility but they get praised for doing the slightest thing and I’m held up to ridicule for complaining about the amount I have to do. As a result my step-mum has it all worked out and it appears I’m there to benefit her decisions. She gets fatigued with the Jane and Alfie, and as dad starts work early, I have to fill in while she’s ‘resting’. As I say, I have to make sure the boys are up and ready for school fully dressed and breakfasted... and have done any homework, which I have to say, at their age is very simple but still it takes up my time and have precious little of it as it is. I’m sick of it but now, because of these unsettling night time activities, which result in my daily soaked nappies, I’m constantly in a state of anxiety. Mum has pulled me up on several occasions about my ‘attitude’ and has decided that I’m just like the twins and need similar treatment. She seems to get a kick out of putting my nappies and plastic pants out on the line next to theirs. It’s embarrassing because it means neighbours know, though suspect, because of my ‘attitude’ towards her, she’s already gleefully told them that she now has to nappy another ‘baby’ in the house. This doesn’t stop my resentment but at least I have my own room where I can occasionally find time and space for myself. However, even that is no longer private as she’ll waft in without so much as a knock and deposit my laundered clothes, and clean nappies, with a flourish and give me a condescending smile as she makes sure I’m aware of the crinkly plastic pants she blatantly puts on the dresser. “Your protection darling,” she announces with a forced grin, “you will let me know if I’ve got yours and the twins nappies mixed up won’t you?” I’ve asked for privacy but she just smiles and whispers that babies who still need their nappies don’t get privacy. Then flounces off leaving me steaming but with nothing I can do about it. At one point I was so angry I told her that I’d go off and live with my grandparents (on my mother’s side) and she just laughed and said that an incontinent teenager is no doubt just what they want in their dotage. He actual words were, “Bugger off then, I’m sure they can’t wait to look after a pants wetting, obnoxious little shit like you.” She’s twelve years younger than dad and has the ability to be as sweet as pie when in public but as vicious as hell if you get on the wrong side of her. Which I have to say has become a great deal more noticeable since the twins arrived. + Dad has quite a liberal, easy-going background where diplomacy, discussion and reason are the way people interact. He has always been there for me and we get on very well. I respect him and listen to what he has to say. I never used to argue with him. Diane on the other hand comes from a family that has a military background, where she and her three brothers were in constant competition for their parent’s approval. They moved a lot from bases around Europe, so were never settled for too long, or there were long passages of time when their father wasn’t around as he’d been posted overseas. I suppose, if there’s conflict and your dad’s involved, that must leave you in a state of nervous anticipation the entire time he’s away. However, in a family of such an abundance of masculinity, the sole daughter had found that by undermining those brothers she often was able to deviously direct action her own way. I’ve never met that side of the family. At the registry office wedding I can only remember dad, her and me, plus the registrar and a couple of witnesses. I gather that because she was pregnant said she didn’t want others to know her ‘condition’ so a big wedding was out of the question. Thinking back, maybe I might be remembering this wrong, but I might have overheard granny telling someone she thought dad had been tricked into marrying her... but I could be wrong. I might have just thought that myself. + Dad had warned me about my attitude towards his wife... I mean... I stopped calling her mum but she wasn’t happy with me calling her Diane so sent dad to have ‘another quiet word’. She insists that Richard and William call her mummy and now when she speaks to me she calls herself ‘mummy’ to me as well. If dad isn’t around I try and fight back but she just tells him when he gets home from work and I’m back in hot water. Then he goes off on one saying he expects me to pull my weight around the house, less back chat, more respect for what she has to do... oh... and act my age. Diane then undermines that by treating me like a little kid. She doesn’t let me forget I still wet the bed so sees me as just a big ungrateful toddler who still needs to wear a nappy. “I wasn’t there when you were a baby,” she gives me that sickly smile, “but there again; it looks like you’re reliving being one. How lucky am I to get to change your soggy nappies?” I seethe with rage but, as she’s holding up my well-soaked morning padding, it’s hard to argue the point. The weird thing is she doesn’t seem that bothered about the wetting because as far as she’s concerned, the bedding is safe now I’m well contained at night. She has said, in one of her less aggressive moments that it’s no trouble washing my nappies as she has the twin’s daily contribution to do anyhow. She makes out she’s a martyr and I’m an ungrateful teen who acts like a toddler going through his ‘terrible twos’. She demoralises me all the time and dad, because he’s so busy and under a load of work-related stress, says “Listen to your mum.” He thinks, because of what Diane has said about me, that I’m just acting out and should be “contributing - not alienating” everyone around me. It doesn’t help that at her insistence either she or dad has to help me with the pins and material to make sure my night time nappy is on correctly, although I suspect it’s more to make sure I wear one to protect the bedding. Yes that’s the other thing, she’s not only convinced dad that I need a nappy but I’m too incompetent to sort it for myself so need supervision. She mentions the extra laundry she had to do when all this first started (‘as if I don’t have enough to do’ she complained to dad) and insisted on not only a waterproof mattress protector but as I’ve said, nappies and plastic pants to act as the best barrier. She convinced dad that I’m too resentful not to try and take it off so she needs to be sure. So, I’m supervised each night to avoid any possible leakage, which in truth they did on a few occasions where I half-heartedly put the nappy on myself. Dad has taken her side in all this (I suppose I can’t blame him too much because I’m fifteen and wetting the bed) and often looks at me as if I’m doing it on purpose... but why would I? + Before all this my bedtime was when I wanted to go, I didn’t have a specified hour but ‘just be sensible’. However, now, because I have to be put in protection she insists I am ready by 8pm (at the latest) because she doesn’t want to be changing me at any time of my choosing. Sometimes, and I’m sure it’s out of spite, she tells me to get ready as soon as I’m in from school as she’s too tired to worry about putting an ‘argumentative teenager’ back in a nappy when it suits him. Dad takes her point and agrees which means often I’m wearing a nappy around the house when I’m still doing chores or worse still, when her friends pop by. I try and escape to the privacy (as if) of my room but that isn’t always possible. I’ve complained that I can’t go out like that but she says that’s up to me. If I want to go out there’s no one stopping me, which is true but how can I go out and meet friends whilst wearing a nappy? My friends haven’t yet abandoned me but I see them so rarely, apart from school, that I might as well be a recluse. As I’ve mentioned, ‘Mum’ on the other hand, has loads of ‘friends’ who also have kids and all seem to congregate at our house. There’s barely a pause in the number of people who are always popping in or ‘just passing’ and of course my nappies are not a secret to any of these visitors. Diane happily discusses my problem as if she’s talking about the twins and though I’ve objected and asked dad to have a word he just tells me to get over it.... “What if they come up with a solution?” and that puts an end to my complaint as far as he’s concerned. So far they haven’t and I don’t anticipate they ever will (find that elusive solution) but it’s an argument I can’t win so the humiliation continues. If I’m in the living room or just passing through she’ll make a comment, or one of her friends will, and, as I say, she always speaks as if I’m a baby, so they do as well. I hate everyone and everything yet still can’t stop this night time flood, which of course makes me even angrier but also makes Diane’s position that much stronger. And if I’m being honest the constant stream of pee seems to be getting worse. + tbc +

Not since I bought the ball gag.

Introduction What would happen if, no matter how old you are, your parents found your stash? Well, on an already miserable day, that’s exactly what happened to Tom. How will both he and his dad handle it? Chapter 1 - Rejection ‘Well, thank you for coming in today, myself and the panel will discuss the interview and the recruiter will get back to you in due course’. Tom could see in the eyes of the interviewer it was going to be another rejection. He couldn’t understand it, just over a year ago he’d graduated with a 2:1 in Architecture. He thought he’d walk into a job, but he’d applied to every company he could find, and had 15 interviews never getting further than the second round. He couldn’t understand it, what was he doing wrong? Whatever it was it wasn’t how he presented himself. He looked gorgeous in his grey slim fit suit and smart tan shoes. He is 5’9, short jet black hair, with beautiful bright blue eyes, but I guess it’s what you say in interview which is important, not how you look. He stood up, grabbed his posh leather bag his dad had gotten him for his graduation, shook the panel’s hands and made his way out into the busy London street. No sooner had he stepped out the building a rough looking man bumped into him with a cigarette burning a hole right into the shoulder. ‘Hey!’ said Tom. ‘Fuck off, prick’ cursed the man as he hurried on. It was the final straw, a tear rolled down Tom’s face. He couldn’t take much more of life at this point. Everything was falling apart, or that’s how it felt. 23, no job, no friends who are local, his mum has passed away and he’s still living with his grieving dad Steve. After travelling back by train Tom let himself into the house and rushed straight upstairs to his room. ‘How’d the interview go?’ called his Dad from his study. ‘Crap’ shouted back Tom. Once in the room he started to undress. He hung up his suit jacket and inspected the burn. Maybe it could be repaired? Probably not, now he doesn’t even have a suit if he gets another interview. Nevertheless he took off the trousers and placed the suit in its special bag like always, before putting it in the wardrobe. He grabbed his joggers and a t-shirt and turned to lay on his bed, but as he did, he saw something which made his blood run cold. Could this day get any worse? His worst nightmare was lying in front of him. His heart thumped in his chest as if it was about to exit it. His face flushed red, sweat started to bead on his forehead, panic started to set in. Lying there in front of him was one of his adult nappies, and on it a note. “Hey son, let’s talk, love Dad”. Tom had bought these nappies a few months back from a medical supply company whilst his Dad had been away for work. He’d been interested in them for a while. He’d enjoyed the few he’d tried but he’d not had the courage to wear them once his dad got back. He’d hidden them under his bed in a carrier bag, but clearly his dad had found them. He couldn’t believe it, how could this happen? For an hour he sat there thinking of excuses he could make, plausible stories he could tell. “They’re not mine”. “I’ve been having bedwetting problems”, “I…” none of them seemed convincing. He didn’t feel like he could leave the room. After at least an hour and a half his dad called ‘dinner!’ Heart thumping and head racing he made his way down the stairs. He was physically shaking. When he saw his Dad at the table, he froze. ‘So you don’t think they’ll ask you back?’ asked his Dad. ‘No’ Tom tried to say, but nothing came out. ‘No’ he said eventually in his third attempt. ‘Sit down it’s getting cold’ said his Dad gesturing to Toms dinner. Tom made his way over and sat down in silence. For a short while they both ate, but Tom really wasn’t hungry, if anything he felt sick. He just shuffled his food around. When his dad had finished he reached out and put his had on Tom’s. ‘Talk to me Tom’ he said gently, trying to make eye contact. Tom was physically shaking, he couldn’t speak, he was living his worst nightmare. His Dad lent across to him. ‘I found your nappies mate’ he said. Just hearing that out loud drove through Tom like a train. ‘They’re not mine’ he blurted out. It was like a reflex, he heard himself say it, but he didn’t think he’d actually processed what he was going to say yet. His dad gave him a soft smile. ‘I know they’re yours son’. He said softly. ‘Tell me why’ he asked. Tom put his shaking hands over his eyes, tears now starting to well up. ‘Please talk to me son’. ‘I’m sorry Dad, I’m such a failure. I’ve got no friends, I don’t have any hobbies, I can’t get a job, I’m going nowhere. I’m a disappointment. If mum were alive she’d be heartbroken at what a useless adult I’ve become’. ‘Oh don’t be silly’ said his Dad. ‘You’re going through a tough time, I know, we both are, but you have your whole life ahead of you. You’re only 23’ Tom couldn’t look at his Dad, he still had his hands over his eyes. ‘I just wish things were like years ago, when mum was alive, when I was carefree and….happy’ sobbed Tom. ‘Is that why you bought the nappies?’ His dad asked gently. ‘I dunno, I dunno why I bought them’ said Tom regretfully. ‘Do they take you back, to a happy place? Are they a stress reliever for you or something?’ His dad enquired. ‘I guess so, I’m sorry, I’ll throw them away, please don’t think I’m a weirdo or a sicko dad, please’ said Tom. ‘I don’t, I understand, if they relax you and you want to wear them that’s fine. I wore them myself for a bit when I was your age’. Tom immediately pulled his face out of his hands. That was an unexpected sentence. ‘What?’ Said Tom in shock. ‘I wore nappies as a stress reliever, to regress for a few years, never did me any harm, better than drugs or booze’. Said his dad dismissively. Tom didn’t know what to say, he just stared at his dad in shock, and in a strange sense, relief. His dad got up and gestured to Tom to get up and give him a hug. Tom obliged, got up and put his arms around his Dad. ‘You’re still shaking’ he said. ‘This might be the perfect time for one of those nappies’. Chapter 2 - Relief When Tom went back into his room the nappy was still there laying on the bed. Half of him desperately wanted to put it on the other half wanted to throw it out the window. Eventually the half that wanted to wear it won out and he started to unfurl it. After he’d just had permission to hadn’t he? He slowly pulled down his joggers, pulled down his boxers and sat himself on the nappy. He laid back for a moment and stared at the ceiling. “What am I doing?” He repeated to himself, but his desire to carry on pushed through and he slowly and carefully applied the 4 tapes of his Tena Maxi adult nappy. He slowly closed his legs. The nappy popped and crinkled as it resisted. The feeling was amazing, he could feel the stress of this bizarre day drain away. After a while his dad called up. ‘You can come down you know, I want to watch Traitors’. Tom and his Dad had been watching it on catchup together each evening. Tom stood up, his nappy crinkling, not overly loudly, but noticeably in a quiet room. He pulled the joggers over it and looked in the mirror. It wasn’t noticeable from the front. He made his way down and quickly sat in the chair, so his dad couldn’t notice or tell. Tom was hugely into the Traitors on TV, but his mind was elsewhere tonight. As his dad commented on it, he just managed the occasional “yeah” instead of the usual debate. Eventually it finished and his dad switched off the TV. He looked across at Tom expectantly. ‘So did you put one on?’ He asked. Tom paused for a moment. ‘Yeah’ he said shyly. ‘Feel better now?’ asked his Dad. Tom breathed out slowly. ‘Yeah, I guess I do’. He said eventually. ‘Good’ said his dad. If that’s all it takes to relax you, just wear them son, I won’t judge. ‘Can I ask a practical question though?’ ‘What?’ asked Tom uncertain. ‘Do you, wet yourself?’ His dad asked plainly. ‘No!’ exclaimed Tom, as if it was a ridiculous question. He’d worn three on his own, and it had not remotely occurred to him to wet them. It was just the feeling of the bulk he liked. He wasn’t about to start wetting himself! ‘I mean, it’s not a crazy thing to ask Tom’ his Dad said. ‘You’re wearing a nappy and I ask if you wet yourself’. There was an awkward pause. ‘Well, if you do have an accident, I’ll put some bin bags in your room. Take it off, ball it up, put it in the bag, tie it up and put it outside your door, I’ll get rid of it. Don’t put it in the bins in the house, they can smell after a bit’. ‘Oh for god sake dad, I don’t wet myself!’ Repeated Tom as he got up to leave the room. ‘Hey’ called his dad grabbing his arm. ‘Don’t walk off on me, I’m being understanding and supportive. ‘It was a perfectly reasonable question and I wanted to make sure we have a plan for it’. ‘I know, sorry Dad, it’s just weird that’s all’ said Tom genuinely. ‘I guess I’m just embarrassed, y’know’. ‘Yeah I get that son, wearing a nappy is embarrassing, but it’s nothing to be ashamed of, people wear them for all sorts of reasons. As long as they’re helping you, it’s all good, I’m proud of you for talking to me about it at all and doing what makes you happy. I don’t think I could have handled it so well with my dad if he ever found mine’. Tom thought to ask his Dad if he ever wet his nappies, but it just felt too weird. Chapter 3 - The bathroom problem Tom stood in the bathroom cleaning his teeth, then habitually turned to the toilet to do a wee before getting into bed. As he went to grab it his hand slammed into his pad, not his boxers, opps. He reached inside and tried to pull it out the top, but he’s not that well endowed and it wouldn’t reach well enough even with the nappy pulled right down, he’d just pee all over himself. He tucked himself back down, squatted and reached into a leg guard. The guard was tight, but he managed to get the head out and point it to the toilet. He tried to go, but the pressure of the leg guard was stopping the flow. He squatted even more, and eventually wee squirted out, some in the loo, some up the wall and some in the bath. It was very awkward, and it had made a huge mess, but eventually he was done. He hurriedly started to clean up bathroom. Once in his room, he dropped his joggers, took off his t-shirt and looked at himself in the mirror. Like before, half of him thought he looked good with the nappy on, the other half thought he looked like a freak. For a moment he planned to take it off, but ultimately decided against it, he didn’t have many, he didn’t have any money and he didn’t want to waste it. He pulled on his pjs over the top of it. It took a while before he fell asleep, the feel of the nappy seemed somewhat overwhelming. It was keeping him awake, but eventually he did drop of. … He looked over at the clock with one eye, 3:10am. He woke up for a wee at this time every night. For a split second he thought about going in his nappy, but it was just a second. He made his way to the bathroom, where exactly the same thing happened as earlier, except worse, because this time he was half asleep. Like before he hurriedly cleaned up, to what he thought was a good standard, and made his way back to bed. … The following morning, he woke as usual and made his way downstairs. ‘Jam on toast?’ asked his Dad? ‘Yes please’ said Tom still a little sleepy. As his Dad made breakfast, he turned to Tom. ‘Ok, here’s something I gotta say’. He said. ‘If you’re going to wear those nappies in my house, I’d much rather you wee in it and cleanly dispose of it, than wee all over the bathroom’ he said waving the butter knife. ‘Sorry, I thought I cleared up’ said Tom in a bit of a panic. ‘I just need some practice, sorry’. ‘Tom’s’ dad turned around. ‘If you want to wear, but still use the loo. I’ll get you some pull-ups, but if you’re in those it’s just not really practical, unless you remove it, which of course pretty much ruins it. Tom thought again about asking his dad if he’d wet his, but like before it just felt odd and creepy to ask his dad that. ‘I’ll try sitting next time’ said Tom. Chapter 4 - A Subscription! It may surprise you to know that after his shower that day Tom put on regular underpants. He’d had his fill, in fact for the next 2 days, no more nappy and it was only mentioned a couple of times by his dad, gently enquiring whether he was wearing one or not. That doesn’t mean Tom hadn’t thought about what had happened virtually every waking minute. It was just that after the initial rush it just felt too awkward to go about his normal daily routine at home, in front of his dad, with a nappy on. That initial confidence had been lost. Tom was at his computer at about 11am, his Dad was in his study downstairs working. He’s a self employed accountant, he works from home most days, only occasionally going into the city to meet a client. There was a knock at the door. “Sign here please mate” Tom heard the delivery driver say, before several thud sounds. Tom made his way down curiously. In the hall his Dad was positioning 3 large boxes. ‘What you ordered?’ asked Tom. His dad stepped back with a big proud grin. ‘Open one’ he said. Tom stepped forward and pulled the tape off of the box on top and flapped it open. ‘Nappies!?!’ He said in shock. ‘Why have you ordered nappies?’ Tom said with a look of confusion on his face. ‘Because you told me you like to wear them, so I’ve ordered you them for you.’ Tom looked at the huge pile. 21 per pack, 3 in a box, 3 boxes. 189 nappies! ‘Well how many are you expecting me to get through?’ He asked incredulously. ‘I don’t know, but you save on delivery if you spend over £80 and get 10% off if you sign up for a subscription, so I got 3 cases’. ‘A subscription!’ Tom said almost shouting. ‘It’s ok, I can cancel it, there’s no commitment’ said his dad waving it off. ‘Look they’re there if you want one. You feel stressed, or just want one they are there. Take a pack up to your room, I’ll store the rest in the spare room’. Tom walked up to his room carrying his bag of nappies. He couldn’t decide what he thought about it. It had been great that his dad hadn’t freaked out, it had been a huge relief his dad was so supportive, but buying him 3 cases without asking? As Tom looked at the nappies in the pack on his bed next to him, he had an odd feeling. He wanted to put one on of course, but he also now felt this uncomfortable expectation from his that he would, and that if he didn’t his dad be oddly disappointed that he’d wasted his money. He put the pack to one side and made his way downstairs. He tapped on his dad’s study door. ‘I’ve got to ask dad, why have you ordered me three cases of nappies without asking me if I want them?’ His dad turned around on his office chair and took off his reading glasses. ‘Because son, if I’d have asked if you wanted me to order them you’d have said no, and I know you want them deep down. You can’t afford them, and you’d not order when I’m here even if you could, so I just ordered them for you. Save you the anxiety. You’re under no obligation, they’re there if you want them’. Chapter 5 - No obligation Tom’s days were not as full as they could be. He’d get up, have breakfast and then go on the job hunting sites. If there was anything to apply for, he’d apply for it. Generally though he was done by lunchtime and scratching around for something to do. Today was one of those days, he’d applied for one job, he didn’t really like the sound of it, but it was that or apply for nothing. He went over to the pack of nappies that had just arrived and pealed them open. They were the same make as the ones he’d bought, but these were the highest absorbency ‘Ultima’ version. He pulled one out, and held it. Just holding it in his hand gave him a buzz. He un furled it and felt the contrast been the smooth plastic outer shell and soft padded inside. It gave him a magical, warm and excited feeling inside. He slowly pulled down his jeans, then his boxers and laid himself on the bed. Slowly and carefully he pulled the nappy up snuggly between his legs and securely taped it on. Instantly the day went from empty and dull to a whirlwind of emotion. He no longer felt bored, he felt excited. The nappy, that his own dad had bought him no less, sat comfortably and reassuringly between his legs. He reached down and felt it. The bulk was considerable, his man parts locked away beneath the thick padding. He laid on his bed in just his t-shirt and nappy, just enjoying the moment for a while, before lifting himself up from his dreamlike state to stand. The nappy pushed between his legs. As his walked over to his mirror he could feel its presence with every step. He looked at himself in the mirror. He liked what he saw, he thought it looked both cute and smart all at the same time. … “Knock-knock” ‘Hi son I’m done, fancy a walk?’ Called his dad through the door. Tom dived to the floor to grab his jeans and then tried to pull them on in a panic. As he did, his door started to open. Before long he was standing there in front of his dad, trousers half up in a t-shirt and nappy. ‘Ah, you tried one’ said his dad. ‘Like em?’ ‘Err yeah’ said Tom. ‘A bit thicker’ ‘Yeah, I thought well, if you do wet yourself, these will last you a bit longer’. Replied his dad. Tom didn’t know how to reply to that. His instinct was to say ‘I don’t wet myself’ like before, but in truth he was thinking about giving it a go, given how difficult it was to use the loo. ‘I can’t go for a walk in this’ said Tom, pointing to his nappy. ‘Why?’ asked his dad. ‘Err, why do you think?’ Replied Tom. ‘No, genuinely Tom I don’t know why’ his dad replied. ‘Tell me’ ‘People will notice!!’ said Tom. ‘Who’s going to notice?’ said his dad incredulously. ‘You can’t tell it’s there under clothes’ he said confused. ‘It’s a private thing, no one knows what underwear you’ve got on, get over yourself’. Tom finished buttoning up his jeans. They were actually a little tight with his Tena Ultima nappy underneath. ‘I’m going to take it off’ he said as he started unbuttoning again. ‘Right’ said his dad authoritatively. ‘I’m supportive, but to a point. I won’t have piss all over the bathroom and I’m not having you waste nappies by putting them on, then just taking them off again moments later. They’re expensive. Do up your bloody trousers and stop being silly’ Tom didn’t really know what to say. He stopped unbuttoning. ‘Does it really not show?’ ‘No son, it doesn’t’. Now come on it’s a nice day, let’s get some fresh air. … As Tom walked along the bulk of the nappy was present with every step. Both he and his dad were fast walkers, but in his nappy and tight jeans he was struggling to keep up a little. It was a beautiful day. They went to the park, had an ice cream and on the way back walked past the local pub. ‘Fancy a cheeky pint?’ Asked his dad. They often went into the pup together. ‘Yeah, why not’ said Tom. They both had a couple of pints before it was time to leave. They didn’t talk about Toms nappy at all, mostly about the Traitors on TV. ‘Ok, I’m going to pop to the loo and then we’ll head off’ said his Dad. ‘Ah yeah, me too’ said Tom. His dad stopped and looked at him. ‘You do make me laugh, why are you doing it to yourself? You can’t wee all over the floor in a public bathroom, it’s rude and disrespectful’. Tom looked at him, kinda accepting that he had a point. Whilst it felt so crazy to wet himself, as his dad became more accepting and as Tom was waddling around in the nappy anyway, it felt increasingly silly to not use it for what it was designed for. ‘The thing is son’ said his dad. ‘They deteriorate after 4-6 hours anyway, so you gotta change it whether you use it or not, you may as well use it. Tom stood and waited whilst his dad went to the loo. He was breaking his neck, but he couldn’t go. Something in his brain was telling him no. He couldn’t just wet himself right there in the middle of the pub! As they walked back, Tom was getting increasingly desperate and his dad noticed. Tom was walking quicker and quicker and couldn’t stop grabbing his crotch. His bladder felt like it was going to burst. ‘Stop walking a minute’ said his dad, stopping himself. Tom stopped, the urge unbearable. ‘If you don’t let it go you’ll hurt your kidneys. That’s what I did, it was agony for days. That’s why I’m trying to help you. Just go, you don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me’ With that Tom’s bladder burst, right there in the street. Wee poured uncontrollably into his nappy. He stared desperately at his jeans in the full expectation that wee would be pouring down them, but it was not. What he could feel though was his nappy expanding and getting larger and tighter in his jeans. After what felt like forever, he stopped. ‘Come on then’ said his said. As Tom walked on the nappy felt completely different to before. It was much much bulkier, oddly to him though it didn’t feel at all wet. It had clearly absorbed all the wee and left him dry, which was pretty amazing actually, who’d have thought they’d work so well? It felt so strange yet at the same time so comforting to have had an accident and been protected by his nappy. It also made him feel small, having just stood there in front of his dad and wet himself. As they walked along his dad turned to him and chuckled. ‘So I guess that answers my question. You do wet yourself.’ Chapter 6 - Something awkward Over the next few days Tom had worn a nappy on and off, even when wearing all but a couple of very carefully managed wees has been in the toilet, with great difficulty. He was really conflicted about whether to wear one or not. Even though his dad was fine with it, almost encouraging it, he was still embarrassed to talk about it, and felt a little silly with it on. Things had been reasonably normal. His dad had enquired occasionally as to the state of his nappy, but it wasn’t often. Just things like. “If you’re wet son, don’t forget to change regularly”. His dad had also bought him some powders and creams and impressed upon him the importance of good skin care and hygiene. “Wearing nappies isn’t dirty or gross son, but you do need to up your game on hygiene and skin care” he’d said. … As they sat and watched tv that evening, Tom decided he’d do a wee in his nappy. He stood and after a few odd movements he started to wet himself. ‘Good lad, I notice you’re getting better at that’ said his dad. Tom stood a while longer until he’d finished, then sat back down in his now wet nappy and finally said something that was increasingly bothering him. ‘Dad’ he said. ‘Can I ask you something really awkward?’ His dad switched off the tv and looked at him with suspicion. ‘Okaaay’ he said slowly, Tom took a deep breath. ‘Do you like me in nappies?’ He eventually asked. ‘What do you mean?’ asked his dad. ‘Well, like just then, and other times, you seem to be encouraging it. Like you want me to be in nappies and wet myself and stuff’ asked Tom. His dad moved his gaze away for a moment thinking about what he was going to say. Eventually he returned to Tom. ‘It’s not about me, it’s about you son. I just want you to have what I never had, an understanding parent during this part of your life. It’s obviously in our genes to like this. I’ve passed it on to you. I want it to be as easy and enjoyable as possible for you to go through. Not like my experience. I’d have loved my dad to have accepted my nappy wearing, but I never got it, and I never got to find out what he would have done or said.’ ‘I see’ said Tom. ‘Granddad never knew?’ What would you have wanted granddad to do or say?’ Asked Tom. ‘I’d have liked him to say it’s fine, I’d have liked acceptance, I’d have liked….to have…well it doesn’t matter’. ‘No do say’ said Tom. ‘Heck, we’re beyond holding back aren’t we?’ Tom’s Dad paused for a considerable time. ‘I’d have liked him to change me. BUT that doesn’t mean I’m asking to change you!’ He blurted out Tom sat there, looking at his Dad. ‘Do you want to change me then?’ He asked gingerly. ‘No, No!’ said his dad definitely. ‘That’s not what I meant, I wish I’d not said that’ ‘You don’t want to, or you feel like you don’t want to ask?’ ask Tom. His dad looked increasingly uncomfortable. ‘I can’t do this’ he said starting to stand. Tom grabbed his arm like he had his a couple of days before’. His dad sat back down. ‘What do you want from this?’ Asked Tom. ‘Why are you so supportive? Why are you buying them for me?’ Asked Tom ‘Son please’ said his dad desperately trying to end the conversation. ‘No, come on dad, we gotta have this discussion’ insisted Tom. His dad started to claw at the said of the chair. ‘Because I remember how much I wanted to go back into nappies, and if I’m honest a part of me still does want to occasionally. I remember bottling it up for years, the anxiety of trying it, hiding it, feeling wrong and weird. When I discovered you’d inherited this from me I decided I didn’t want you to go through what I did. I wanted you to be yourself, be happy, fulfil your desires, be content in yourself’. Tom didn’t know what to say. His dad went on. ‘And if I’m completely honest, I want to share in your joy of it, in a way I never got to. Sorry I know that’s selfish, I don’t want to put you under any pressure, this mustn’t be about me’. ‘I really do appreciate that dad, thanks so much’ said Tom as he came over for a hug. ‘Have I got it right?’ His dad asked ‘What do you mean?’ Asked Tom ‘Do they make you feel how I think they do?’ ‘They do make me feel happy and relaxed’ said Tom. ‘A kind of contentment I’ve not felt in a long time’. ‘Then tell me son, tell me why you shouldn’t wear them as much as you want?’ After a long pause ‘When I say I’m not asking to change you, please don’t think it’s because I wouldn’t. If you asked I’d be right there for you, but I’d never put you under any pressure to, you know that don’t you?’ ‘Yeah I know that dad’ said Tom. ‘I’m not sure that’s something I could handle, at least not now’.

I'm back! Thanks y'all for being patient during my hiatus. 💜 It's a Briana chapter, and she's got a sleepover planned with all her Little friends. Exciting! 18 Sleepover It was a gorgeous spring Saturday in the Rasmussen house. The windows were open to let in fresh air and birdsong. The wood floor of the house’s great room glowed in the late morning light, freshly polished. From top to bottom, the house was immaculate, far more so than during a regular Saturday cleaning. This was mainly due to Briana’s and her Round Table's efforts. Briana paced in front of the stuffies lined up on the living room couch. One by one, she inspected the chore each stuffie had been assigned. · Knight Captain Alanna: Responsible for beating the dust out of the rug – done. · Squire Beartholomew: Asked to put out a bowl of chips and a bowl of cut strawberries – done. · Sir Chuck the Giraffe: Charged with dusting the furniture – done. · Sir Mimsey the Bat: Tasked with putting away toys and arranging throw pillows and blankets – done. · Sir Arnold the Pangolin: Trusted to put plastic glasses and a juice pitcher on the coffee table – not done! “Sir Arnold the Pangolin, I’m very disappointed you’re not finished with your job.” Briana shook her head at Arnold the Pangolin. “Luckily for Sir Arnold the Pangolin, your Princess is in a good mood. Plus, there’s still time before our guests arrive.” Briana snatched Arnold the Pangolin up and sprinted to the kitchen. Mindful of her pretty pouf dress with its lace overlay, she and Arnold the Pangolin took the glasses on the first trip and the pitcher on the second. The dress and lace were black, so the grape juice probably wouldn’t stain her if spilled, but it wasn’t worth the risk. She hadn’t spent her morning getting dolled up like a Little version of her gothy mom only to ruin it at the last minute. All chores were finished, and the snacks were ready. There was only one problem – no guests! Frustrated, Briana trotted across the hardwood floors in her brand new black and white Mary Jane’s. The clicky-clack noise her shoes made was enough fun that she didn’t feel like throwing a tantrum when she found Veronica – Briana was merely impatient. “Momma!” Briana hopped on the drawing room’s plush rug, which didn’t make a fun noise but had a delightful squish. Veronica was sitting primly in a black leather armchair with her laptop on her lap. She took an interminably long moment to finish whatever she typed before looking up. “Yes, Baby Bee?” “When’s Grandma going to get back? She’s been gone for ages.” “Michelle had three Littles to pick up, all living in different parts of town. I’m sure she’ll be back any minute.” Veronica smiled. “I’m glad you’re so excited, though. Did you finish all your chores?” “Barely! Arnold the Pangolin was sandbagging again.” Briana did a twirl for the joy of seeing her skirt flare out. Twirling was almost as fun as being at eye level with her mom. It only happened when Veronica was sitting or crouching down, which made it easy for Briana to stay in Littlespace around her mother. Two friends on their way were petite as well, though not as tiny as Briana. Nobody in the whole Graduate school was as tiny as her. Arthur was the opposite of Tiny, which made the ease with which he slipped into Littlespace impressive. Briana wondered if she should have Alanna commend him for it or if he’d be upset to have his size brought up. “Briana, are you listening to me?” Veronica had set her laptop aside and took Briana’s hands, pulling the Little girl into her lap. “Sorry, Mom, I was thinking about my friends. I can’t wait until they get here.” With a happy sigh, Briana leaned against her mom and tucked her head under Veronica’s chin. “I asked if you needed a change before they get here, but I can see you’re too distracted to notice.” Veronica flipped Briana’s skirt up and squeezed the Little girl’s diaper. “You’re dry, good girl.” It was funny how something that had used to bring Briana to tears – being diaper checked – had become such a comfort and reminder of Mom’s love. “Melody is going to play with us, too, right?” Briana squirmed until she had her arms around her mom and gave her a tight squeeze. “They said they would, so it’s a promise, and they have to play with us.” “I’m sure your sibling will happily play with you.” Veronica kissed Briana atop her head. “They said they were looking forward to it. But they won’t be here immediately, so don’t be disappointed. You’ll have plenty to do when Michelle returns with your friends anyway.” “Oh my gosh – I mean Goddess – it’s going to be so fun! Thanks for letting me have a sleepover, Mom.” Veronica got a funny look on her face when Briana invoked the Goddess. She always had a weird look when Briana brought up the one thing in her life that Briana hadn’t yet gotten to experience. This time, it was just a look instead of a swat or a frown. Mom even gave Briana a little squeeze. There could be no better time to ask Mom, especially after Briana had been such a good girl with her chores. “Momma, can I go with you to the next esbat?” “Not the next one.” Veronica put a finger on Briana’s lips to silence her whine. “April’s esbat is scheduled for the end of the month, during the dark of the moon. It’ll be one of our more serious ceremonies, and it won’t be a good introduction to the coven for anyone, especially a Little girl.” “But Momma!” “Let me finish. Beltane will be at the beginning of next month and the perfect time to introduce my bouncy, sparkly daughter.” “Really?!” Briana’s enthusiastic hug squeezed a grunt out of Veronica. “Mom, that’s super exciting! Can Melody come if I convince them?” “Only if they really want to come, and not if they agreed because you were badgering them.” “Melody loves me and you too; they’ll come.” Briana hopped off Veronica’s lap and did three spins in a row, giggling. “Thanks, Mom! I’m going back to the living room, so I’ll be ready when Grandma gets here.” “Don’t forget that your grandmother is in charge of your sleepover. Jane and I will be here, but you’d better not come to ask us for something she’s already said no to.” “Mom!” Briana’s exclamation of shock had little effect on Veronica’s knowing look. Reluctantly, Briana nodded. “That was only one time. But I promise I won’t. Okay, love you, momma. I’m going to watch the door now!” ~~~*~~~ Twenty eons later, or twenty minutes later – who’s to say – Briana heard a car pull up outside the house. An excited squeal burst out of her when the door opened, revealing Grandma and a train of bashful Littles. Grandma Michelle was dressed in a sturdy blue shift dress and looked downright vigorous; her health scare from Christmas seemed well behind her. Briana hugged Grandma, Arthur, Fabi, and Ava, adding a quick kiss to her girlfriend’s hug. They were all dressed Little, too. Arthur was in shortalls that looked like regular overalls that had been cut off and hemmed. He had a backpack over one shoulder and a stuffed tyrannosaurus under his arm. Fabi was in a purple, short-sleeved dress with a crazy amount of lace under her skirt. Her bag was an adorable teddy bear backpack – she had an elephant stuffie clutched in one hand. Ava wore a rainbow tie-dye t-shirt and lime green shorts that didn’t do much to hide her diaper. Her bag was a laundry bag – she looked like she was having trouble managing it, her crutches and her teddy bear Brownie all simultaneously. Briana took Ava’s bag, then Fabi’s and Arthur’s, to not to single her girlfriend out. With an oof from the weight, Briana set the bags by the stairs. “Hi everybody, thanks for coming to my sleepover! We have snacks and juice and anything you want; just ask.” “You’re all welcome to have some snacks, but don’t fill up.” Grandma guided the Littles into sitting positions on the living room rug. “I’ll have lunch for you in a few minutes.” “What’s for lunch?” Fabi asked. “Lefse! You’re going to love it. It’s potato flatbread with butter and sugar.” Briana bounced happily on her padded rear at the chorus of aahs from her friends. “I know you all kinda met at my birthday, but did you get re-introduced in the car if you needed to?” Briana asked. “I can do introductions! Or we can introduce our stuffies.” “We had a chance to talk in the car.” Arthur chuckled. “Your grandma squished us all into the back seat of her car,” Ava said with a giggle. “Also, Brownie has already met your stuffies, but he’d love to meet Athur’s and Fabi’s.” “This is Elle!” Fabi scooted up to Ava, shoving her elephant urgently toward Brownie. “Hi, Ellie,” Ava said for Brownie, waving his paw. “I’m Tommy,” Arthur said in the squeaky falsetto he used for his stuffed tyrannosaurus. Briana giggled and grabbed her stuffed Lioness. “Alanna knows Tommy and Brownie but is very pleased to meet Elle.” “Brownie is a kshatriya, which is kind of like a knight.” Ava declared. “Are Tommy and Elle knights like Alanna is?” “Of course, I’m a knight!” Arthur squeaked for Tommy before switching to his usual bass rumble. “Sorry, Tommy, but you know you can’t pass the qualifications.” With Athur’s help, Tommy had a stomping fit on the Little boy’s leg. “I think Elle can’t pass the tests or whatever either.” Fabi cuddled her elephant close. “She’s not into scary stuff like fighting.” “Then Brownie and Alanna will protect Tommy and Elle if needed.” Briana declared. In response, Ava grinned, scooting over to Briana to bump her hip against Bri’s. The sweet smell of potato pancakes followed Grandma out of the kitchen. Though she had food on the stove, Michelle managed to pour each Little a glass of juice and check their diapers. There were lots of blushy giggles in Grandma’s wake, especially from Ava. When the pancakes arrived, they were as delicious as they’d been the first time Grandma had made them. Savory, sweet, and buttery tastes filled Briana’s mouth with delight and her tummy with warmth. Besides the clinking of plates, the room was quiet as the Littles devoured their lunch. Briana cleared the lunch plates without being asked – because she was the best Little girl ever. While she was doing that, Grandma whisked Ava away for a diaper change, redoubling Ava’s blush. Briana plopped down on the floor between Arthur and Fabi, pulling them both into a hug. “I have to tell you two about something a bit scary that happened to Ava.” Briana was glad to see her friends responding with curiosity rather than nervousness. She had the mellowing power of Lefse to thank for that. “Ava and I were out together the other day and ran into some anti-ABDL protestors. One of them pushed Ava over and hurt her pretty badly.” “What?” Arthur’s jaw dropped, his expression struggling between Big rage and Little Concern. “Is she okay? I mean, she looks okay, but…” Fabi trailed off nervously. “She’s okay now, but it was terrifying; we had to call an ambulance.” Briana sighed. “Don’t make a big deal when she comes out, because she doesn’t like talking about it, but I wanted you to know that mean people are getting aggressive with Littles.” Arthur sighed. “Great, one more thing to deal with in town.” Fabi nodded. “So much for ever going out, now that I’m full-time Little.” “No! We can’t let them win. I have a plan to fix it; we’ll talk about it when Ava gets back.” “Talk about what?” Ava asked, maneuvering deftly on her crutches ahead of Grandma. Briana squirmed out from between her friends in time to pull Ava into a snuggle as she sat. “Fixing what happened to you the other day.” “That reminds me,” Michelle said. “Have you ever heard back from the police, Ava? I know Briana hasn’t.” Ava shook her head. “Not yet, but it’s only been a few days.” “Oh, that won’t do at all.” Michelle pulled her phone out of her purse. “You kids, go ahead with what you were doing. I’m going to give the police chief a call.” Arthur and Fabi looked at Briana in surprise. Before Briana could answer, Ava shrugged at them. “Her family just does stuff like this.” “My family and I have a lot of privilege in this town – and I’m going to put it to good use.” Briana squeezed Ava. “What happened to Ava is not okay. I don’t like seeing protestors or people talking badly about Littles. We’re not hurting anyone. They’re the ones harassing and hurting people.” “What are we supposed to do about it?” Arthur frowned. “It’s not like you can take away people’s right to protest. Even if they’re protesting for something mean.” “Of course not, but we can keep them from hurting people when they do it.” Briana thumped a fist on the rug. “And if we convince people that it’s okay to be Little, they’ll stop protesting alone.” “You’re talking about an activism campaign?” Ava scooted away from Briana, frowning. “Briana, I can’t even see my old friends; I can’t go on TV or whatever!” Fabi whimpered. Arthur kept quiet, but he looked as uncomfortable as Fabi did. “I’m not asking anybody in this room to do public stuff.” Briana looked up at Grandma with a smile. “Well, maybe Grandma. But mostly, it’ll be me and my aunt Kiara – she already said she’d help.” “Then you’re just – warning us that you’re going public about this?” The look on Ava’s face said that they would have to have a big conversation about Briana’s plan. That was okay. Briana knew that she could trust her girlfriend to understand once she explained things properly. “That’s part of it, but I could also really use your help! There’s tons of stuff to do that doesn’t involve showing your names or faces. I’ll need help writing letters, calling people, making lists of people to call, making flyers, keeping track of donations, and all kinda stuff.” “You’ve really thought about this.” Ava looked more thoughtful than uncomfortable – a good sign! “Wow, Bri, that’s a lot. You seem kind of like that day you, um – ran into me downtown and bought me cocoa.” Arthur smiled bashfully. “You mean when I was Big and you were Little? Well, I’m still Little, but I can do this! We don’t forget stuff when we’re Little, right? If anything, I think we understand stuff better.” “I just sit around most of the day when I don’t have a babysitter.” Fabi squirmed, her diaper crinkling. “It’d be fun to have something to do, but I’m not a good organizer.” “You could put letters in envelopes!” Briana grinned to see an eager smile on Fabi’s face. “Yeah, I could! Um, could I put cute stickers on them, or would that mess up the plan?” “That would be perfect!” Briana grinned, reaching out to grab Ava and Arthur’s hands. To her delight, Fabi took Arthur and Ava’s other hands. “We can do this Little-style! So, will you help me, please?” “Of course, we’re friends, right?” Arthur squeezed Briana’s hand. “I’m in for decorating and mailing stuff!” Fabi grinned. “It’s scary that you’re going to be publicly ABDL,” Ava sighed. “If you could be careful when you’re out with me, I’d really appreciate that. Even if it is scary – I’m in.” “Yay! Thank you, everybody! Especially you, Ava, for being super brave. I’ll be as careful as I can, I promise.” Ava rolled her eyes, though she was smiling from ear to ear. “You’re lucky I love you, Looney Tunes.” Briana’s giggle at what she hoped was a new nickname was short-circuited by the phrase immediately preceding the name. “You love me?” Ava ducked her head bashfully. “That just slipped out, but – I guess I do.” “I love you so much!” Briana tackled her girlfriend, giggling madly and kissing her all over her face. Ava laughed back, clinging to Briana until they settled into a loving hug. “I hope I’m not interrupting.” Michelle peeked into the back of Arthur and Fabi’s diapers, getting a squeak out of them. “Ava, I told the police chief that his inaction was disappointing. He knows at least some of the names of people that were protesting, but he didn’t want to bother them.” Grandma tutted disapprovingly at the police chief as she untangled Briana and Ava, checking their diapers in the process. “He’s motivated to bother them now. We should have a name and some charges for the person who pushed you soon, as well as a restraining order.” Ava sighed gratefully, leaning against Michelle’s leg. “Thank you, uh… Ms. Rasmussen?” “You can call me Grandma if you want, dear. All you darling kids can if you want. You’re Briana’s friends, after all.” She clapped her hands dramatically. “Now! You’ve got full bellies and dry diapers. Briana gave me a list of activities for the day, including a movie, a blanket fort, and playing Cloudland. Which would you like to do first?” “We can’t play Cloudland until Melody gets back.” Briana protested. “Then it’ll be one of the other two. We’ll let your friends pick. Ava, Arthur, Fabi, what’ll it be, couch fort or a movie?” “Blanket fort?” Arthur asked excitedly. “Yeah!” Ava and Fabi said together. “Then we need to get the coffee table moved to the side. Some rolled-up mattresses can go in its place. You kids get busy doing that while I get the sheets to drape between the couches.” “Got it, Grandma!” Briana grinned, tugging mightily – and uselessly – on the coffee table. With Arthur’s help, they got it moving smoothly enough that they didn’t spill any snacks. Fabi pulled mattresses into place while Ava rolled them out. The Littles were in a snuggle-pile on those mattresses with their stuffies only a few minutes later. Grandma stretched sheets from couch to couch, pinning them in place. She even put a pillowcase across the entrance between Mom’s armchair and a sofa, making a cute door flap. The inside of the fort took on a dreamy blue and green hue from the sun filtering through the sheets. “Fabi, get the snacks!” Briana fished an arm through the sheet-walls to pull the rest of her round-table into the fort. “This is so fun.” Arthur giggled. “I wish we could sleep under here tonight.” Ava nodded eagerly. “That is the best idea!” Briana kissed her girlfriend soundly on the cheek before looking up to shout at the sheet-ceiling. “Grandma, can we sleep in the fort instead of Melody’s room like we planned?” “You don’t need to shout, Little Rose. I heard you and Ava both just fine.” Grandma chuckled. “Ava’s idea is a great one. We’ll get your sleeping bags in there when it’s bedtime.” Resuming their cuddle pile, the Littles munched on chips and gave their stuffies a dance party. Briana was feeling extra snuggly regarding Ava after her girlfriend’s declaration of love. Happily, Ava was the same. They stayed spooned together every minute that they played in the fort. The sleepover was already the bestest fun since Briana’s birthday and promised to get even better when Melody arrived. Through all the snuggles and laughs they were sharing, Briana’s heart overflowed with love for all three of her friends. Protecting them and their magical time together was more important than ever. Briana couldn’t imagine the kind of person who could object to the fun they were having as Littles – but she knew they were out there. That’s okay! I’ll change their minds as quickly as Grandma changes my diapers!

Hey everyone! Congrats to everyone for making it to about the halfway point in this story. I feel this chapter is very appropriate to mark that point in this story, but things are about to get a lot more interesting. Also, I just want to note that I could have dedicated a lot of time to this next chapter. Originally, it was going to be three separate chapters, but then I realized that it might get a little tiresome plot wise. In that same vein, I know I could have drastically simplified Emma’s thoughts or language, but that makes for a pretty boring or near incomprehensible chapter, so I elected not to in this case. I think the end result works and makes for a much more interesting read. Also, minor spoiler here, but Dash does show up in this chapter as an actual character. Nancy doesn’t know his name, so he’s not named, but I just want to put it out there. Namely, I want to note it first because considering the number of views this story has already garnered, I’m assuming some of you may not have read my previous story. As such, basically just remember that toys come alive when not being watched. I won’t commit to if its magic or whatever, but keep in mind that toys only reveal themselves to Littles in dire circumstances or when they believe they won’t be noticed. It’s not a big part of this story, focusing on Emma and all, but just in case anyone gets confused, that’s the reason for some elements occurring in this chapter. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 8: Nothingness, a Doggy, and a Bond The trappings of my life soon became just that. I was a prisoner in my own mind. I didn’t want much anymore and everything around me became fuzzy… unclear as to what was going on. At first, I mourned the loss, but soon, I took comfort in the peace and safety my new life afforded me. I knew it was a dangerous path to head down but considering all that had happened and that I now felt practically all alone in this world, it just felt like a good alternative to what could have occurred to me. See, when Littles sometimes ‘break,’ as I did, we tended to go down one of two routes. Most just regressed their own minds and became mentally like babies from then on out. Recovery was possible but challenging and usually a failure. For me, however, I had gone the other way and I had become locked within my own mind. The major problem of this route for Littles was that their already fragile mind often would regress from sheer disuse or the inability to fight off anyone as they approached with something to further harm or regress them. Unfortunately, I was already starting to feel these atrophied effects take hold of me. While I knew that Nurse Bee’s special shot and whatever happened afterward with the pain in my head could be blamed for some of the problems I was now experiencing, I also knew that the more time trapped in my own mind was now severely degrading it. It wasn’t long before my needs became simple. My emotions were always in flux but my communication with them became very limited as well. A gurgle meant I was happy. Crying meant I was uncomfortable. And anything else that occurred outside my mind was just a physical manifestation of my own body. Even my memory seemed to fade with time. Concepts I had known for years all began to vanish. At first, I was so scared. Imagine forgetting your parents’ faces or the home you grew up in. Time seemed to just not matter anymore though, and it didn’t take long for me to not even mind that something was lost anymore. After all, if I couldn’t remember it, I couldn’t mourn it. Holes were left in my memory, but as the holes started to become the majority of what I could remember, one hole was just as sad, or meaningless, as the next. At some point, I just stopped caring. Between that and my near-constant need for sleep and other basic needs, my life soon merged into a routine. By the end of the second day, I had nearly lost all track of time and the only things I could recognize were those things that continued to be mentioned. Daycare, Nancy, Emma, diaper, messy… things like that, but most of those words had little meaning for me anymore. And each time I closed my eyes to sleep once again, I found I was missing more. I knew it wasn’t long before my current life was all I knew. I would live in the moment, not caring about what was next or what had just happened. Every time I had that thought though, my eyes soon closed once more as I fell asleep in my crib. * * * Nancy looked down at me and I cooed over seeing her face again. I wasn’t sure who ‘Nancy’ was exactly, but she was a pretty lady who kept me fed, warm, and clean. To me, that’s what mattered. “Who’s my Little snookums, huh? Is someone ready to go to daycare?” she asked, clearly not expecting a sophisticated answer back. As usual, I cooed back in response. “I’ll take that as a yes!” Her smile was infectious, and she played with my feet for a moment, before picking me up and taking me to the car. I didn’t like the car or my car seat, so I began to fuss. “Oh, honey. I know you don’t like this thing, but I need to get you to daycare and…” Her phone began to ring, and I started to fuss more as she turned her head away from me. “Oh, shoot! That’s work. I’ve got to take this, sweetie. I’m sorry.” She then popped her phone out. “Hello? Yes, Greg. I’ll be there in a little bit… No, I know that you all wanted me there early, but I just can’t with Emma…” Nancy seemed all upset and I got a little upset as well. I had no idea who Greg was, but I just wanted her attention back on me. She tried to play with my feet from a distance, but it just wasn’t the same. Nancy noticed. “Look Greg, I have to go… I didn’t regress her. You think I wanted this? She’s wonderful and all, but…” She looked back at me with a sad face and then quieted her voice. I could still hear her though. “It’s not my fault. The daycare screwed her up and taking care of a near newborn is hard enough. She had a blowout this morning and… yes… yes… I understand. I will be there as soon as I can…” Sighing, Nancy then hung up and turned her attention back to me. “Sorry, baby. I needed to take that but come on. I’ve got to take you to daycare pronto.” Seeing her attention pop back to me, I only cooed again. She smiled and I tried to as well, but I just heard a little farting noise instead. ‘Weird…’ Nancy tickled me a little bit and then left. Just as I was about to cry out though, she popped back in front of me, so everything was good. She even made this big noise with what we were in, and I cooed over the rattling I now felt in my body. Smiling back at me, Nancy turned on some of what she called ‘music.’ I wasn’t really sure what it was, but I just knew I liked it. So, I cooed back at her again. What felt like a thousand years later, Nancy stopped, disappeared for a moment, but then reappeared and picked me up. I cooed at her touch, but before I could really feel her closeness, I was given to someone else. I began to distress a little. “Sorry, Diana for the late drop-off,” Nancy apologized. “She had a blowout and I hate to drop and run, but I’ve really gotta go now.” The woman, Diana I guess, nodded and raised up my hand a little. “That’s okay, Nancy. We’ve got her now. You run off back to your job.” Nancy then waved at us and took off. Diana waved my already raised hand back to her and it felt kind of funny. I felt I had a new ability as my hand flopped about. It was so cool, but Diana stopped and just sighed. “Well, I guess I best get you settled Emma. No need to wait around out here…” I started to distress a bit, but Diana soon started bouncing me a little in her arms. It was actually kind of fun and I cooed a little bit during the process. Before we had even moved much further though, this one tiny person came up to us. “Miss Dee-Dee! Miss Dee-Dee!” she called out. ‘Who’s Miss Dee-Dee?’ Diana looked down at her though. “Yes, Lilly. Is there something I can help you with?” Lilly, I guess, nodded her head and clutched the doll in her hands more tightly. “When’s Emma gonna come back an’ play with us? Is she any better?” Diana started responded back, though I still wasn’t sure what was happening on whether she was really Diana, Miss Dee-Dee, or was just a special person and had two names. ‘Do I have two names?’ Diana shook her head to Lilly’s question. “I’m sorry, Lilly, but Emma here is on a different level than you are now. She might come back, but you need to be prepared that she might not.” Lilly seemed to listen but then quickly looked distressed and tried pulling my foot from her position below me. “Emma! Emma! Please talk to me! Please! You gotta wake up!” Diana moved me away and pulled Lilly away from me before waving over to a new woman. “Easy, Lilly. You need to stop that. There’s nothing any of us can do now, so you just need to accept this. Until then, Miss Mindy here is going to take care of you, okay?” By now though, Lilly was crying, and I started to get a little distressed myself. “Oh dear,” Diana said as she started to bounce me around again. “Guess someone needs their morning nap and a feed.” My cries stopped and I cooed back. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” Diana then waved to Miss Mindy and Lilly as the two hugged each other. Lilly was still crying, and she seemed so familiar, but the prospect of getting fed quickly snapped my mind off the brief thought. That cycle repeated for a long time after. Maybe a year, or a month… a day… actually, I wasn’t really too sure on the who concept of time anymore, but it felt like a long time. Regardless, nothing changed. I would wake in the morning, Nancy would drop me off and would get more upset every day with me, I would come to daycare and go through that cycle, and then I would be taken home where I would go to sleep again. It was all a routine, but a pleasant one at that. My world had shrunk very nicely and despite Nancy and others seeming distressed around me occasionally, I just kind of accepted my life. It felt safe and easy. But I guess life never stays that way though, and soon, I finally felt like I was cracking up. That patchwork-like stuffed dog that seemed somewhat familiar had wandered into my crib in the Burrows room… and yes, I know how it sounds, but I swear they walked right up to me and even spoke to me. I just assumed it was a dream, but he kept doing it with such vigor that it almost frightened me. Stuffy’s are just not supposed to talk. It’s almost a basic law of nature, ‘I think?’ but after a few more times, I kind of just accepted his presence as he snuggled down next to me after trying to get me to talk for the millionth time. I mean, even if I wanted to or could for that matter, what would I even say to a stuffy come to life? ‘Hi, my name is Emma. You are supposed to be an inanimate object and you’re probably possessed or I’m going crazy… more than what’s normal for what I’ve been through that is. Want to be friends?’ Something like that just didn’t happen, and I kinda just accepted the funny-looking but soft stuffy into my life. On top of that though, I began to realize I almost had a superpower of sorts. I couldn’t fly like the birdies outside or be strong like Nancy was, but I heard everything when most people thought I was just a shell of who I was. I was already seeing the stuffy come to life, but I saw so much more as well. I couldn’t really retain anything, but nonetheless, I still heard everything in the moment at least. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Gillies,” Miss Dee-Dee said while the other large scary woman looked down at me in the crib. I had since managed to remember Miss Dee-Dee’s name and I was so proud of myself. It was small, but I felt like such a big girl for remembering that she was called two names. Two was a big number after all. “She hasn’t changed since Tulia brought her in last week.” “Then I want you to do something different with her. Nancy is threatening to sue us or leave, and because it’s disrupting her work, they’re backing her up as well,” Mrs. Gillies, I guess, said harshly to Miss Dee-Dee. For once, I swear that Miss Dee-Dee seemed scared herself. “But it’s not my fault, Mrs. Gillies…” Miss Dee-Dee tried to defend herself. “It wasn’t my medicine that made her this way. It’s Brit…” “It’s Nurse Bee around here, Diana,” Mrs. Gillies rudely interrupted Miss Dee-Dee. I really wanted to defend my kind carer around here, but I could only just coo and let out a little fart instead. ‘It’s so funny when I do that… Miss Dee-Dee always changes me afterward and blows kisses on my tummy. It tickles!’ I paused, realizing I had lost track of what was being said above me. ‘Shoot! She’s saying something again.’ “…I know it’s really hard to work under these conditions, Diana, but we have rules for the staff here as well for a good reason. You know that, or do I have to remind you again?” “N… no, m… ma’am,” Miss Dee-Dee stuttered out. “I don’t n… need a reminder…” Mrs. Gillies smiled and rubbed Miss Dee-Dee’s shoulder. “That’s very good, Diana. It’s for your own good. Trust me. I’ll talk to Nurse Bee tonight and see if we can’t figure out this little glitch of hers. I think I can calm down Nancy and get to accept everything, but I’d prefer not to have to do that for other caregivers. Six Littles ending up like this is too much and you know I don’t like this type of outcome for our Littles.” Miss Dee-Dee nodded. “Yes ma’am. Of course.” Both looked down on me, smiled, and then walked out of my view. I was more than a little confused of what I had just heard, but I felt there was a big problem with someone called ‘Nurse Bee.’ I don’t think that Mrs. Gillies or Miss Dee-Dee wanted me this way, so maybe I had two other people on my sid… ‘Oh! Another toot! Feels so funny! Everything feels so squishy now! Squishy time! Squishy time!’ I cooed a little in my crib. The stuffy dog would be here any moment and Miss Dee-Dee would come back and remove my squishiness and… ‘Wait… wasn’t I just thinking about something that was said? Done to me?’ I really tried to remember, but another little toot came from all my straining to think. ‘Oh well. I guess if it was really important, I would have remembered it…’ So, all that kept happening. I would see something, panic and think about it, but then forget about it just as quickly. I might remember some of it later, which is the only reason that I could retain anything, but the most I could piece together was that Miss Dee-Dee and Mrs. Gillies wanted to help me out and were sorry and Nurse Bee was bad… I guess. Again, all super fuzzy, but like most things, I just had to live with it. It seemed that would be my life forever, but my new stuffed companion apparently just kept coming to me. Oddly, during one of the visits, I swear I heard a voice in my head and life in my limbs for the first time in forever… a week… a day ago? I really didn’t know, but it was there, or at least it was for a moment. I tried after, but only managed to make out another little fart. Now, I had never had a toy before… at least I think so, so I wasn’t sure why I kept getting this strong urge to hug this stuffy that kept dropping by. He certainly wasn’t new, and his stitching almost scared me, but he stuck by me. No matter what; diaper change, bottle feeding, cries… everything. He would always hide when Miss Dee-Dee or Miss Tully came to check on me and calm me down, but he was always back soon after. It wasn’t much, but he was someone I could cling to and rely on to be there for me in this place. So, when he came back to me one day and laid down for a while after I had arrived at the daycare late again, I didn’t really think anything of it, but was just glad he was here again. Almost instantly though, I heard something again buzzing in my head, but unlike the other times, I could almost make out most of the words. “Wake up… wake up… no one is upset with you… you are a good girl… just wake up…” just started playing over and over in my head. At first, I couldn’t make much of it out, but when I concentrated, by the third time it went through my head, I could hear almost as if someone were directly talking to me. Having just woken up from a nap, I could have sworn it was all just part of a dream, but as my eyes began to flutter open more to their still semi-relaxed awakened state, I heard something new this time. “Emma… wake up, Emma. Wake up for me… show me something… please, Emma… I will protect you… I will make it all okay… just please wake up…” I began to get excited. Hallucination or not, the patched stuffy dog seemed to be trying to reach out to me. There was no one else her, so it just had to be him. Being so far set adrift in a world of nothingness, it was something, so when he walked away from me again, I didn’t like it. So, I tried to muster all the strength I had inside and tried to will myself to do… say anything. Finally, I let out an “Uhhh…” The stuffy stopped and looked back over at me. First, I was elated that he had stopped. Even more though, second, I had made a noise. Having basically just been a passenger in my body for so long… ‘Maybe?’ I still wasn’t sure about things like that, but to me, all this now almost seemed like a miracle. I watched as the stuffy moved closer to me. He almost seemed just as relieved as I was, but as quickly as he turned around to see me again, he began walking away again. Not wanting for any of these miraculous new sensations or ability to go away, I let out another “Uhhh…” Again, the stuffy whipped back around to see me. I wanted him to do anything just so I could test more of myself out. Perhaps it was just a fluke, and I had some bad gas, always possible with a Little, but I just hoped it was something more… something longer lasting. ‘Had I finally found my exit from this locked-in state?’ Curiously though, instead of speaking to me, the stuffy only stared back for a while and then began to gather the blanket around me into a large pile halfway between me and the bars of the crib. In an instant, he went from looking at me to disappearing completely. I began to panic. ‘Where had he gone? He was right there! Is he a magic dog? Do I have some special magic dog just floating around and that’s why he can talk, walk, and I can hear him mentally?’ I wasn’t sure at all, but I definitely knew I wanted him back. So, frustrated, I dug deep and let out another “Uhhh…” To my relief, he popped out from behind the bunched pile he had formed. I still wondered if he was a magical stuffy, but I just cared that he was back again. Suddenly, I felt an odd sensation on my face. It was moving, near on its own and felt like it did when I cooed lately, but I still felt confused as to what it was. Seconds later though, my mind clicked into place and a deep memory popped to the surface and I realized I had no reason to panic. I wasn’t in danger. I was just smiling! Everything felt so joyous, and I just wanted to hug my new magical stuffy so badly. Moreover, I just wanted anything to happen to keep this progress going, and as if he could read my thoughts, his mouth slowly opened. “Emma…” My heart leapt for joy, and I felt myself smile even more. My magical stuffy spoke! I hadn’t just imagined it all, and I wanted to see or to hear more, but I was just so happy that a change felt like it was in the air. And, as if all that wasn’t enough, my magical stuffy walked over to me and nuzzled into my chest. Not being able to do much, but still wanting to acknowledge what he had done, I tilted my body a bit right into him. He didn’t say anything this time, but he seemed happy. That happened for a little while longer, but I could see that he almost looked like he wanted more. As if to confirm my theory, he then leaned over near to my face and looked right into my eyes. “Emma… you’re safe with me. I can be your friend if you want, but just please come out of the darkness. Come back to us, Emma…” As if a key had suddenly been turned, I felt new life within me. Sensations I had forgotten long ago came flooding back to me. My eyes, once so lifeless and still except for the keenest of observers, began to open wider as I looked back at my magical stuffy. “Oh Emma…” he said breathlessly. Everything felt so good… so new and exciting. I wanted to embrace it all and to my surprise, I even began to be able to wiggle about as my body started to awaken once more. It still wasn’t much, and I couldn’t win a race against a snail most likely, but even a little bit of something was still more as compared to when I had nothing. It was an absolutely perfect moment and I had never felt such joy in my life, or at least that’s what I assumed right then. But then something clicked within me. Now, just to be clear, as my faint recollections of my past began to flood in, I started to remember the basic stuff first since I had become like this. I remembered names and faces for the first time since all this began. Who they were was still hazy and I maybe could tell you the difference between the days, but the memories were slowly coming back. And while all that felt wonderful, I realized just how boring my life had become. It was a series of feedings, naps, diaper changes, and being hauled from one location to another. In all my memories, I could only remember being in this daycare, Nancy’s house, and her… ‘Car? Yes… car…’ I had the faintest sense there was more to life than that, but it was just beyond my fingertips. Still though, it was there, and it made me want more. Which is when I realized that I used to have more… and lost it. I wasn’t sure, how, why, or when at that moment, but I just knew I did. Seeing myself lying in this crib and being excited to do more than fart or cry was a serious blow to my happiness. My previous wiggles quickly stopped, and though I was getting my memories back, I was still very much the person I had become. So, with my emotions still in flux and triggered so easily, I broke… again. I deeply worried that this new issue would break me as it had before. I felt all the same sensations surrounding me and the loss that each of them meant. Everything felt so distant, but the images were still there of at least who I used to be on a large scale. I couldn’t remember things like street names or where I was a year ago but faces and things that I had done were becoming much clearer, so my loss now felt even worse. And, when all that began to fade again, I panicked even more. Tears flowed from my eyes, and I would have given anything to stop myself. I wanted an out, but I didn’t see anything. I was in the same room and even the same crib with the same sense of loss. I felt myself plummeting toward the abyss once more, but then I opened my eyes, and through the tears, I saw one difference: my magical stuffy. Hoping and wishing beyond and harder than I ever had before, I willed the last of my being into my arms and shot them straight out to what felt like the most recent constant in my life. I could have missed, and everything would have been over… but I didn’t. My hands clasped around his soft fury body, and I brought him right into my chest as tightly as I could. My tears were horrible, and I surely thought someone was going to help me, but no one ever came. Miss Dee-Dee, Miss Tully, or the volunteers here must have been on break or something, but that still left me. My magical stuffy was wonderful, but I just wasn’t sure if even he was enough. Suddenly though, like before, I heard something float through my head. “Easy, Emma… calm down and relax… listen to my messages… feel them… hear them… relax…” Surprised, but so relieved, I could feel my sobs began to fade out of nowhere. I knew it had to be my magical stuffy, and as such, I felt he was truly magical, so I hugged him even tighter. I felt a little fuzzy and sleepy right then, but at least my cries began to simmer. I had no idea what was happening, but as I gazed down to my magical stuffy, I just felt I had finally found the peace I was looking for. Never wanting to part with him again, I hugged him closer with one arm, but curiously, my other snaked up and my thumb planted itself right in my mouth. Never having the strength to do so before or the desire before all this, it was an odd and yet wonderous feeling. I never wanted it to leave my mouth again, but as my eyes drifted closed, I just felt happy that maybe, just maybe, I could find my way back to who I used to be. * * * Later that night, I was feeling much better, especially after I was able to wiggle my fingers after my nap, but back home, I could see that Nancy was in another one of her moods. I had been distressingly ripped away from my magical stuffy when she picked me up and now, amidst all the chaos, I desperately wanted him back. Further, having remembered some of my past now, I sadly knew that today wasn’t the first time that Nancy had come home upset. Remembering other times, I didn’t know much, but I knew I was a burden to her lately with the lack of my current abilities that she now had to deal with. Still, after my bath, I was snuggled into my jammies for the night and brought downstairs by a now calmer Nancy to my relief. I sat on her lap as we watched Squares and Letters, a show dedicated to younger Littles like me. There wasn’t much of a plot, and I drifted in and out from time to time, but tonight at least informed me, when I correctly guessed what a square was, that I was slowly getting better. Unfortunately, in the middle of the show, Nancy got a call, and I was placed into my bouncer carrier seat nearby to still watch the TV. “Yes, hello sir… no sir, I just got home and…” Her face quickly changed to one of concern and worry. “No sir, I didn’t mean to leave before my meeting was over but Emma and… I understand sir but I really need to… yes sir… yes, I understand that Littlecare is important to the company, but I need to find a way to make things work… yes sir… yes sir, I’ll be in early tomorrow morning… goodnight, sir…” Nancy then hung the phone and seemed like she was about ready to cry. I wanted more than anything to comfort Nancy right then, but as things were, I could remember what had just happened and that Nancy was having work troubles, however, that was about it. Right as I thought she was about to burst into tears though, her head snapped towards me. “You…” I had never seen her so angry before, let alone have it directed right toward me. With my newly rediscovered perception of the world though, I was never more scared in this house than right then. “You… you were punished by the daycare. I read the report, and you did this to yourself!” she spat at me. I could see the tears begin to drip down her face and I knew she was just speaking out of anger and frustration over everything, but I was genuinely shocked over what I was seeing now. “Mrs. Gillies said it was an accident and that you really couldn’t be held responsible for your actions, but ever since you came here, you’ve defied everything!” To emphasize her point, Nancy had even thrown her hands up in the air. “I mean, ever since that first day I met you… it’s just all been about you. You never thought any of us Bigs were right, and now, look at you! Probably can’t even tell if you’re wet or messy right now as compared to before. I bet if I checked, not even that long after I just changed you, you would at least be a little wet!” I wiggled just a tiny amount to see if I was wet, but I really couldn’t tell if I was or not anymore. I suspected that would take a long time to come back… if at all. “And now… I’m stuck with practically a newborn! What got into me to take you in? I must have been out of my mind when I did it. I should just return you to the foster home…” She paused and stomped her foot on the ground. “Damn it! They probably wouldn’t even take you anymore. You’re just a lost cause to pretty much everyone now. Ten years ago, newborns were all the rage, but now? I might as well give you freely to the institution up the street!” It was all a lot to process. I could tell this had been building up for some time, but to hear it all in one fell swoop… I felt like right on the cusp of everything turning back to normal between us, now, was crashing down all around me. For all I knew, in a week I would be locked up with the rest of the deformed or mentally damaged Littles in the nearby state institution. I still couldn’t remember much, but Garden Gate Hospital stood out in my mind as a place to avoid at all costs if any of the rumors there were true. So, tired, emotionally drained from my long and trying day, and now verbally assaulted by and scared of Nancy, my seemingly whole world yet who now seemed set on giving me away, my emotions simply gave way. I tried to hold them back but considering the earlier smile I had managed still felt like a miracle, I was useless to keep from bursting into tears. Unfortunately, Nancy was still upset at me and her whole life now. She tried to ignore me at first. She even walked away and plugged her ears at one point, but I could tell it was no use. I could see hatred and desperation in her eyes. “Shut up! Shut up! Just shut up!” she lashed out at me. It was a terrible moment, but even through the blur of my own tears, I could see that Nancy was at her wits end as well and crying herself. For a moment, she even seemed shocked herself over what she had just said out loud to my poor tiny crying form and cupped her hands over her mouth and shook her head. She didn’t mean her words tonight, and I could see it in her eyes. It still didn’t take their sting or the fear they induced away from my heart, but it was something. It was something even more to see though as she leaped out and grabbed me up. “Oh baby! Baby! Please! Shhh, shhh. I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry!” she lamented as she began to rub my back and bounce me around. I wasn’t sure I was emotionally ready to forgive her, but my infantile Little instincts were in the drivers seat still and began to lull my cries away. “Shhh, shhh, honey. I’m so, so sorry, Emma. I’m just so stressed. Easy there. Easy. I’ve got you.” My cries continued to quiet down. “There, there. You’re safe. No one’s going to hurt you. No one’s going to take you away. I was just upset, and I didn’t mean all that.” She then paused and sat on the couch as she transferred into more of a cradling position with me looking back up at her. “I don’t even know if you can understand me. I wish you could speak, but if you can still think, I’m just so sorry.” I probably could have said something, maybe even a ‘na’ for her name by now, but I decided to keep quiet still. I wanted to hear what she had to say first. “I took you in as a friend, but I didn’t think of the future. I should have and that’s on me. You were just an adult in your old life. All our commercials say otherwise, but I could see your intelligence when you read at least… then all that got taken away. Slowly, you turned into this… and I just wasn’t ready.” She paused for a moment and looked away briefly at some of my babyish equipment and toys that now littered her family room. “I should have talked to my friends more about you and what to expect, but I didn’t. I should have talked to my boss more, but I didn’t. That’s on me, and there’s no excuse. Punished or not, you put your trust in me, and I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I still don’t know if you can understand me, but maybe show me a sign if you can? Please, baby… something… anything…” I debated for a second if I should just let her wallow in her torment longer, as words didn’t always heal other words said before, but I saw the genuine look of apology and regret in her eyes. I saw the longing for forgiveness the most though, so, having a little more control over my body now, I decided to smile back at her. Not even questioning my newly required ability, Nancy lit up. “Oh honey! Thank you! I don’t know if that’s maybe even just gas, but I’ll take what I can get. Come here, baby!” She then held me close and began to rock me back and forth as she hummed a pleasant and familiar tune. I couldn’t place it for the life of me, but I was just happy over our shared tiny moment. Everything remained like that in such peace and quiet… but then my stomach began to growl. I just ate when I came home, but I guessed my stomach needed what it needed. Nancy quickly noticed. “Oh! I think someone’s stomach just growled at me, huh?” She then slightly adjusted me and prodded around with my diapered rear. “Hmmm… not messy, and you’re probably not uncomfortable, but what about being hungry? Do you want some food maybe?” She looked back at me and knowing my own needs and having the ability to communicate a little better, I smiled back at her. She chuckled. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” She stood up and walked away from the family room couch, stepping over a few of my leftover items on the floor. “Come on, baby. Let’s get you fed.” I was so happy. We were communicating much better now and Nancy felt like she was finally accepting who I was as a Little now. I wasn’t sure how long the peace would last, and I still had a long way to go myse… ‘Wait… where are we going?’ I watched as Nancy slowly walked me back upstairs instead of the kitchen to fetch me a jar of pureed Littlefood or to warm a bottle up. As we entered my nursery, I at least knew where we were going, but I still wasn’t sure why. Like the rest of my life, as we entered, my eyes were confronted with the notion that my room had changed as well. Unlike other Littles though, whose rooms were changed out of spite or humiliation most of the time, mine was changed out of necessity. The rocking chair was new, but comfortable whenever Nancy read me a story. The books, no longer read by me, or even held by me, had grown simplistic and overly colorful. A changing table, crib, and my wardrobe had all changed as well and everything had now been bathed in pink, purples, or some kind of pastels that blended in nicely. It was a wonderfully comfortable room, but I was still confused why we were up here to feed me. Sitting down in the rocking chair and cradling me back in her arms, Nancy didn’t seem satisfied with my position for far longer than normal. Once she stopped moving me around though, I was too low to be read to, yet too high to be spanked. It was extremely comfortable though, and I felt I could even doze off quite easily, but I still had to question it all in the first place. ‘Had Nancy finally cracked like I did? Couldn’t I have just been fed before she did though?’ As if to punctuate my pressing concern my stomach rumbled again. Nancy smiled down at me. “You know… Mrs. Gillies and I have been talking for a while now. She’s been a big help in making sure you were cared for with your new disabilities, but she’s been slowly suggesting other things that could help us bond better. One, I even bought pills for, but as it turned out, coincidentally, I found out I didn’t even need them a few days ago. I wasn’t sure if to tell you or not, but I think as a kind of recommitment from me to you, I should tonight.” I was still confused, but my eyes bugged out in further confusion as Nancy began to unbutton her shirt. I could feel the heat radiating off her body and I hoped that’s where it would all end. It didn’t though and I froze in shock as she unbuttoned a clasp on her bra and revealed her chest fully to me. “See baby… I’ve been thinking that I should become something more for you. I’ve just been torn between my work and home life lately, but tonight, I realized I really should be focusing on you. You need me right now, and if my job doesn’t understand in this world, I will just find another. After all, it’s not every day I try to start being a mommy to my Little now, is it?” she asked down to me. Her words were full of tenderness and her touch was as soft as ever, but I saw a twinkling of some kind in her eyes. I wasn’t sure what it was at first, but I soon realized that it was desire. She had shown it before, but now, her desire was to care for me and to be my new mommy. Yesterday, I might have just cooed at the idea, but today, I felt very different. Unfortunately, once again tonight, my Little babyish instincts began to take over right then. Maybe it was the smell coming off Nancy or the sight of her exposed nipples, but still without much control over my body, my face began to head right for her chest without question or much resistance. Being fully aware of everything and still feeling that something was off, though I couldn’t quite place it, I could only view my actions as an outside observer in silent horror. See, while my memory was still fragmented, I did remember a few things about Bigs and Littles, namely about breastfeeding. Just the situation in general was the stuff of most Littles nightmares, but there were also several facts about it, all interesting to observe but not necessarily witness firsthand. Chiefly though, I remembered something about the hormones in women Bigs specifically. Breastfeeding tended to form a bond they couldn’t break. It was similar for Littles, but the bond formed in half the time for Bigs. Worse, the bond tended to come with a few side effects, namely a change in the personalities of the women feeding their Littles. As my lips wrapped around her nipple, I could do nothing but watch in terror and panic over what was going to happen next. Horrifyingly, as my still regressed instincts took over, I found myself growing attached to the milky substance now trickling down my throat. It was difficult at first, and occasionally Nancy would wince and tell me “No teeth,” but my body just seemed to want more of the wonderous liquid. For her part, Nancy only just cooed at me and stroked my hair in clear contentment. Buried deep, I felt the liquid almost tasted like a milkshake and was the best thing I had ever consumed, but my newly awakened mind burned with the shock of everything that was going on. Before today, everything seemed boring but routine. I could have mapped the next years of my life out with no problem. Once I had awakened though, everything now felt like it was so up in the air. Nancy seemed so much more set on becoming my mommy, but conversely, I felt certain that I wanted more in this life. I wanted to run, play, and jump outside. I knew my path back was difficult, if not impossible, but my goals were still there. As I began to drift off and Nancy just continued to smile in near pure bliss down at me though, I had no idea if her possible new personality would even allow me to. No matter what, I just felt the tremendous weight of the future bearing down on me and all the uncertainties and challenges I was sure to face. For now, though, I just drifted off as I continued to suck down the creamy liquid.

After the highly embarrassing episode in the escape room Sam is in desperate need for a change. Thankfully there is someone on hand to help her out. --- My writing is my passion and my income. I'm only able to write as much as I do because of the wonderful support from my subscribers. With the ABDL purge on Patreon hurting my income dramatically I have set up a couple of alternatives. If you enjoy my work and want to support me there has never been a time where I need it more. For $5 you can see every update to my stories one week before anyone else and for $10 you get early access PLUS access to 50+ stories EXCLUSIVE to subscribers. There are other rewards and tiers available including discounted commissions. To find out more please consider visiting one of my subscription sites. Prices, rewards and everything else are the same across both https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy Thank you for reading and supporting me and my work ❤️ --- “What’s that smell?” One of the children with one of the other groups asked loudly. The room fell quiet as people sniffed the air. Sam was going red and she wished they could just leave. It seemed like Nina was about to steer her towards the exit when a woman in a Midforest uniform appeared in front of them. “I know that smell.” It was Karen. Sam looked up and saw the older woman looking down at her, “Come on, we can get you cleaned up before you go.” “N-No!” Sam stuttered. Sam already knew that Karen didn’t particularly think much of Sam’s opinion. Before anyone could react Sam had been hoisted into the air and held against Karen’s chest, she didn’t need to be able to see behind her to know her skirt had lifted up and was showing the sorry state of her diaper to anyone who looked her way. Sam struggled. She didn’t want to be changed by Karen again. They were finished with the activity and could just go home where she could clean up in peace and, most importantly, alone. She grunted and whined as she tried, without success, to pull herself free of Karen’s hands. “Wait!” Nina shouted. Sam was pressed against Karen’s chest and therefore couldn’t see what was happening. She did hear footsteps quickly run around to Karen’s front stopping the woman in her tracks. Sam was still squirming and trying to get put down. “I’ll take her.” Nina said firmly. Sam stopped wriggling and her eyes went wide. She never in a million years would have thought she would think this way but she really wanted Nina to change her diaper. If the alternative was Karen doing it then Nina it was clearly the better option. For once the idea of changing herself vanished. Sam seemed to just take it for granted that someone was going to do it for her. She couldn’t say she was wholly against the idea if it was someone she trusted. “I couldn’t make you do that.” Karen said, “From the smell of it this is going to be a tricky change. Not something a young woman like you should have to do. If you want to wait I’ll have her changed in just a few minutes.” “It’s not your choice to make.” Nina replied stubbornly. Sam didn’t know whether Nina was arguing for Sam’s body autonomy of if she was saying that she, Nina, was the one making that choice. Sam bit her lip and found that she liked the idea of her friend taking control of the situation like that. It felt like everyone else in the room had disappeared as a battle of wills developed. In truth, everyone was looking at Sam who was giving off the perfect picture of a little baby having her custody fought over by two women. “I’m happy to-…” Karen started. “Hand her over.” Nina said. Her voice brooked no argument. “If you insist.” Karen’s voice was slightly cold. Sam had never been so happy to be picked up by someone. Karen held her out and Nina took her with Sam reaching out her hands like a small child asking to be picked up. Instead of Nina’s chest Sam was sat on her hip. She could feel the poopy contents of her diaper shifting again but she could hardly get dirtier than she already was. Sam could see there were a lot of very confused people. None more so than her friends, Chrissy and Amy, who seemed to hardly believe the bizarre series of events they had witnessed. Despite the embarrassing situation Sam could hardly hide her smile as Nina adjusted her slightly. Sam noticed she was primarily looking at Karen though. “Come on, Sam.” Nina said as if Sam had any input in where she was carried. Nina turned away and carried Sam towards the bathrooms. Like each of the other places with toilets there was a dedicated changing room next to them and Nina was making a beeline towards that door. Sam looked back behind them and was faintly amused to see Chrissy haranguing Karen. “How dare you pick my friend up without asking!?” Chrissy was saying as Amy held her back, “If she wants your help she’ll ask! I’m going to report you to…” Sam didn’t hear any more as Nina carried her into the baby changing room and closed the door. It locked with a click and both Nina and Sam seemed to let out simultaneous deep breaths which then made them both laugh. Sam was expecting Nina to put her down as soon as they were in private but she was carried across to the changing table instead. Sam looked up at Nina with questioning eyes but Nina was smiling, she seemed to know what she was doing even if Sam didn’t. She reached down to the bottom of Sam’s rainbow shirt and after a small pause lifted it over her head. Sam raised her arms to make it easier for her. “You don’t mind me helping you?” Nina asked quietly. Sam shook her head. Far from minding it Sam was excited. With her shirt removed Sam slowly lowered herself down on to her back as Nina grabbed the waistband of her skirt and started pulling it down. Soon Sam was laying on the table in nothing but her heavily soiled padding. She was red in the face and found it hard to look at Nina. It seemed that by “helping” Nina meant she was going to do it all. Sam was surprised to feel very alright with that. Sam heard the tapes of the diaper pull away from the landing zone. The smell instantly intensified to near unbearable levels. The front of the disposable slumped down between Sam’s legs as Nina closed her eyes and looked away, it seemed to be less to do with what the inside of the diaper looked like and more to do with the stink. “Sorry.” Nina said in a strained voice, “I don’t want to make you feel bad, it’s just… wow.” “No, I’m sorry.” Sam replied in a rather dejected voice, “I should be able to do these things without embarrassing myself and you guys.” Sam was feeling rather sorry for herself again. Even if she was a bit more accepting that she was different than she had been at the start of the vacation she still felt that she was a horrible burden. Fortunately it didn’t take long for Nina to recover and start cleaning. Sam felt that mix of embarrassment and excitement that she always seemed to feel around Nina these days. The soft touch of her fingers as she used the wipes to clean her left a trail of tingles. “You’re allowed to breath you know.” Nina said with a smirk. It was only after Nina had mentioned it that Sam realised she had been holding her breath. She let out a deep exhale and laughed nervously. She didn’t think she could be blamed for not knowing how to handle such an odd situation. “I can’t believe I’m letting you do this…” Sam said with a shake of the head. Nina simply smiled as she continued her work. There was a lot to clean up and Sam spent the whole time playing with her fingers and feeling like she should be doing something to help. She wondered what her other friends thought about all of this. She must seem like the biggest baby to them. “It’s actually not as bad as it seems.” Nina said as she gave Sam a last few swipes with a clean wipe and then pulled the soiled diaper away. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.” Sam replied. “No, I’m serious.” Nina shrugged as she taped the used diaper into a ball, “Once the initial surprise passed it was pretty easy. Something I could get used to.” Sam felt herself blushing. Was Nina talking about when she had her own kids or… “Right, I’ll just tape you into a fresh one and we’ll be ready to go home.” Nina said as she pulled a diaper out from under the table. It turned out the changing rooms at Midforest were all well-stocked for diaper changes. As Sam’s butt was lifted into the air she realised she could probably have told Nina this wasn’t necessary and that since they were going back to the lodge she probably didn’t need a fresh diaper. She also realised that she wasn’t saying anything and as she was lowered on to the fresh padding she felt content. A feeling that only grew as the diaper was pulled up between her legs and taped closed. It was a feeling of safety, a feeling that she didn’t have to worry about making it to the bathroom. With the new diaper in place Nina picked up Sm’s shirt and pulled it over her head. It seemed that Nina had taken everything into her own hands. She even helped Sam back into her skirt once she was off the table. “All set?” Nina asked once Sam was dressed. “I think so.” Sam replied. She looked at the door and grimaced, “What will the others think about… everything?” “I think they’ll just be happy that you’re OK.” Nina replied, “And you shouldn’t worry about anything. If they were going to be asses about any of this they would’ve done it by now.” “I guess so.” Sam shrugged, “It’s just not… normal.” “Normal is overrated.” Nina replied, “I’ll show you.” Sam was about to ask what Nina meant but she was already walking over and lifting her up. Sam yelped as she left the ground and clutched on to Nina’s wrists with her small hands. She gasped as Nina spun around and then held Sam on her hip like a child. Sam’s cheeks went pink as she tried to work out how she should react to any of this. “Most people would say it isn’t “normal” to pick up another woman and carry her around like this.” Nina said, “But you just watch me.” Sam was given every opportunity to tell Nina to stop but the increasingly confident woman’s control was intoxicating to Sam. She bit her lip as Nina unlocked the door then she stepped out into the lobby area. Sam saw that Karen and the other employees were still there, in fact, they were welcoming the next few groups who were going into the rooms. On the far side Amy and Chrissy were leaning against the wall. They definitely looked confused about what they were seeing as Sam was carried across the large room. “Ready to go?” Nina asked cheerily. It seemed that Amy and Chrissy were not as prepared to act like everything was normal as Sam and Nina were. To be fair to them, they had just seen their two friends, one of whom had massively pooped herself, disappear into the baby changing room and then come back out with one of them sitting on the other’s hip. It was even more unusual when compared with Sam’s usual disdain for anything even vaguely childlike. “Sure.” Chrissy said. She almost sounded defeated, like she had been trying to work out what had been going on and utterly failed to do so. --- If you want to find out what happens next you can do so RIGHT NOW at either of the following links: https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/lplyymi677/chapter/8fd4aa8f-6392-477b-a352-81d409b477a9 https://subscribestar.adult/posts/1262441

Author's Note: It's been a while, much longer than I would've liked. I've had some things going on in my private life. Now I've finally gotten the free time and the mental and emotional space to start writing again! We've got a few updates left then this story comes to a close. ********************** “Are you sure the babies will be okay by themselves?” Sonja laid Reila down in a red and white baby bouncer then buckled the safety strap. “Of course, darling.” Emma Jean buckled Rachel into a green and white bouncer next to her. “We’ll be just down the hall in the dining room to eat. All the babies are safely buckled in; what mischief could they get up to? Besides, they’re not really alone. Someone’s always watching.” “Oh, like a baby monitor!” Emma Jean smiled at Sonja. “Something like that, yes.” Jill Froste put Jax’s blue booties with rattles sewn on the toes on his feet while he pouted up at his mom. He’d worked hard to get his booties off, then she goes and puts them right back on. The cool playroom air felt good on his bare toes. The thick booties held in body heat and made him too hot. Seven oversized baby bouncers were arranged around a play blanket and the plastic tea set JJ had arranged earlier. There was a bouncer for each baby: Reila, Rachel, Nicky, Jacky, Jax, Lynee, and Junior. JJ proudly sat by her tea set, ready and impatiently waiting to conduct her pretend tea party. Jacky was the only baby who looked happy to be there. Even usually smiling Nicky was resigned to a miserable fate. “You don’t have to play, Nicky. I can easily hold you while I eat like we usually do.” Azrael slid a finger inside his soggy pink diaper to check just how wet he was. “Your diaper can hold some more. I’ll let the milk work its way through your system in case you poop again.” Nicky scrunched his pert button nose as he felt her finger wriggling inside his diaper, squishing the wet padding and brushing over his wet soft skin. A thick layer of cream and powder protected his fragile skin from any rashes. “No. I’d rather stay here and keep an eye on things. JJ’s not so bad. She’s just. Um. Enthusiastic.” Az snorted and tried to adjust Nicky’s skirt but the bouncer’s safety harness kept his skirt bunched up so his enormous diaper was on prominent display. It didn’t bother Nicky a bit. Normally Az wouldn’t care, especially when he was in baby mode, but Rachel and Reila’s diapers were on display to humiliate them and Azrael wanted to make a subtle point that good babies got their diapers covered. Lynee groaned behind her pink pacifier. When Jill had changed her soaked, poopy diaper after nursing her, she had dressed her in a pink velvet dress that matched Jacky’s blue one. “Mommy! I wanna be a big girl! Not a baby!” Jill checked Jax’s freshly changed diaper, making him pout more. She looked up and smiled at her daughter. “Honey, you are my big girl. But you need some baby time, even if you won’t admit it. You regressed so quickly. If you didn’t need it, you would be like Jackie. She’s a mature girl. I can’t even remember the last time she wore a pullup or training panties.” JJ bounced on her knees, so excited and ready to play she felt like she was going to burst. “I’m ready for training panties! I’m gonna be a big girl like Jackie!” She wriggled and squirmed in place, knocking over a plate of plastic cookies in her eagerness to play with all the babies. She giggled and cleaned up. “We’ll see about that. Maybe if you behave yourself.” Jill muttered non-committedly as she checked on Junior. He pouted up at his mother. “I’m the oldest. ‘S not fair.” He and Jax wore matching blue infant onesies with long sleeves and white snowflake prints. Their feet were snuggly warm in blue booties with rattles on the toes. Padded white mittens covered their hands, rendering them completely helpless and infantile. Emma Jean tapped one of Jax’s mittens, smiling down at him. “Such a cute baby boy! Your wittle mittens will keep you cozy warm! And will prevent a repeat of last year. No naughty boys taking their diapees off this year!” “Of course they’re just babies and can’t help it. That’s why we have tools like the mittens to help them help themselves.” Jill smiled down at Junior. Rachel did her best to ignore everyone, sucking resentfully on her pacifier. Sonja playfully booped Reila on her snub nose. Reila floated in a dreamy haze of warm feelings. Induced by the breastmilk? By the close bond such feedings promoted? Both? She had no clue. She was only capable of drifting along in a cloud of contentment. She had whined a little in protest when Mommy laid her in the bouncer, but a shower of kisses soothed her. She barely paid attention to what went on around her. She was so happy just being in Mommy’s arms. Nothing else mattered. Pesky big girl thoughts disturbed her peace so she pushed them away. Why think when just feeling, just existing and basking in Mommy’s warmth felt so nice? Reila couldn’t remember ever feeling so peaceful, so at right with the world. All the horrible things done to her were just bad dreams left forgotten. “The babies are all set. Let’s go. Everyone probably started eating by now.” Emma Jean headed for the door. “Hopefully that means we missed Grandpa Winter’s speech.” Jill made a yuck face that sent Emma Jean into a fit of girlish giggles. Azrael rolled her eyes. “I like his speeches. They’re old fashioned, formal, and start the feast with a proper sense of gravitas.” “Since when do you care about propriety?” Jill raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow. “Since the rest of us don’t like listening to the old curmudgeon.” Emma Jean answered and pulled Jill down the hall before Azrael could reply and start bickering. “Have fun with the other babies Riley. Be a good girl. Mommy’s gonna eat while you play.” Sonja kissed Reila’s forehead. She looked at Azrael and realized she was all alone with her. Az grinned. Sonja dashed for the open door. “Wait for me!” She called out to Emma Jean and Jill. Azrael looked very pleased with herself. Nicky pouted up at her. “Az. Be good.” She kissed both of Nicky’s cheeks then Jacky’s and exited the room with a small, smug smile that left both babies nervous. Az either planned to be an absolute ass at dinner by egging Old Man Winter on, or she just enjoyed people fearing she would be an ass and they tiptoed around her on egg shells. Soon as all the mommies were gone, Rachel turned her glare on Reila. JJ pointed to Rachel and Reila in their red polka dot dresses with the short skirts and prominent diapers. “Twinsies! Big baby twinsies! With matching diapers!” She giggled to herself. Sonja leaving popped Reila’s happy bubble. Where did Mommy go? She wanted her back! Her lower lip wobbled. Before she could cry, Rachel laid into her. Only then was Reila aware of the glares sent her way. “You stupid bitch. Good job. I was counting on you to wise up and get me the fuck out of here. But no, you just had to screw it up. Way to go. Now you’re one of the babies. All you had to do was be nice to me in that awful stroller. Or be nice to the retarded gimp.” She jerked her head in Nicky’s direction. “Something so easy, so simple was too much for you. Fucking moron. I hate you.” The intense raw emotions thrown her way just when she was feeling sorrow and vulnerable after Mommy left her brought tears to Reila’s eyes. Normally she would defend herself and lash right back, giving as good or better than she got. But her anger, like her teeth, were gone. Oh, what had they done to her? Jax giggled, kicking his floppy feet to make his booties rattle. His fresh, dry diaper crinkled noisily and his bright blue eyes glittered with suppressed malice. “Oh, leave the toothless tard alone. Can’t you see she’s going full baby? She’s even letting go of her adult brain and her big girl thoughts. She’s turning into another JJ. Only stupider.” “Hey! I’m not stupid! You are! I’m a big girl! I can go potty! And you’re just a dumb poopy diaper baby!” JJ poked a finger at Jax’s nose then squealed and jerked her hand away when he tried to bite her. Lynne groaned around the big rubber nipple of her pacifier filling her mouth. “Oh, I hope not. One JJ is more than enough.” JJ grinned at Lynne, mistaking her words for a compliment. “Yes! Cuz I’m special!” Lynne snorted and sucked her pacifier while Junior laughed. Jacky stared at Rachel. “Rachie. It wasn’t Riley’s job to save you. You had your chance and blew it as bad as Riley blew hers. You both just have to accept your fates and learn to grow up.” Hazy thoughts and memories rushed back to Reila. Instead of a happy, cooing adult sized infant, she was once again an infantilized adult. But a longing for that state of happy haze filled her and overshadowed her horror and resentment. Did they fuck with her mind as well as her body? Why not? They fucked with Mommy’s mind. “Fak yoo!” The lack of teeth garbled her speech but she could almost sort of talk again! Elation filled her. Her words lacked their usual venom. Drool coated her chin, but who cared. She could talk! “It’s time to play! I wanna play! Mommy said you have to play with me!” JJ whined to everyone. “In a minute. We’re not done yet.” Jax glared at her. “No. Now!” “I’ll tell Mommy who peed in her favorite potted plant. Think she’ll let you stay in pullups?” Lynne threatened. “No!” JJ howled and kicked a foot before crossing her arms and pouting, fuming quietly to herself. “I think we’ve talked enough. Let’s have a tea party.” Nicky spoke up softly. JJ nodded vigorously. “Reila’s finally found some peace. Let’s leave her be.” Rachel turned her glare on Nicky. “You’re only saying that because you can grow up anytime you want. Being a baby is just fun for you. Why would anyone WANT to be a baby? This is why you’re such a fucking tard. Even as an adult, you still gotta shit in a diaper. Is that why you like playing baby so much? Because it lets you pretend you’re normal?” Hurt flashed in his eyes before Nicky lowered his long inky lashes and suckled quietly on his pacifier. Reila should have felt second hand glee at the sight. Here was a kindred spirit who could do what she hadn’t been able to do. Make Nicky cry. She didn’t like Nicky, and didn’t feel particularly bad for him. But at least he wasn’t mean to her like Jax was. Jacky’s bouncer was next to Nicky’s. He reached out and grabbed Nicky’s hand to give it a comforting squeeze. His pretty blue eyes stared in disappointment at Rachel. “You could grow up any time you want. We all can. We’re just not ready. But you’re too stupid to figure that out.” For a moment he sounded as nasty and vicious as Jax. “Now I never wanna hear you or Reila call my brother or my best friend a gimp, cripple, or tard ever again. No more nasty names. It hurts their feelings. No one likes it.” Rachel sneered at him. “What are you going to do? Tattletale? Make us big babies?” “No, you do that to yourself. Leave my baby brother alone.” Junior spoke up, voice flat and quiet. Rachel turned her sneer on him. “I’ll tell my twin. Jackie. And she’s best friends with Azrael.” Jacky wanted to stick his tongue out at Rachel but refrained. JJ did it for him. She didn’t like all this fighting, and she didn’t like anyone making fun of or messing with her family. She was allowed to pick on her siblings; that was different. Junior spoke up again. “Rachel. Reila. Do you want to know a secret? The truth no one is telling you?” “Junior, no!” Lynne looked horrified. “You’ll end up worse than Riley! You’ll lose more than just your teeth!” “Not posed ta tell!” JJ hollered, eyes bulging in shock. “It’s too soon!” Jacky stared at his eldest sibling. Jax stared from Junior to the Rachel and Reila. A slow, vicious smile spread across his face. “Junior is right. They should know. I wasn’t going to go there, but why not?” That smile as he focused on the girls was full of sweet poison. “I wanna know! Tell me! Please! I’m sorry for all the things I said!” Wild desperate hope bloomed in Rachel’s face, matching how Reila felt inside. Reila wriggled, frantic in her bouncer and making it sway with her urgent movements as her arms and legs flopped uselessly about like an infant unable to control them. Her diaper crinkled as she squirmed, too full of emotion to hold still as she silently pleaded for salvation with every fiber in her being. Rachel stared hard at Jax as her hungry pleas died down, replaced by skepticism. “This is another of your tricks. You’re lying. You put Junior up to this. I’m not falling for it.” She turned to Reila. “Don’t listen to them. Jax does shit like this all the time. He’s a manipulator. Worse than any Ruprecht. He’ll get your hopes up then break your heart. He’s sly. The stupid grownups never catch him. That rotten cunt Jackie lets him get away with it. She covers for him. So does Azrael.”

Hi all, I wasn’t sure the right forum for this as it applies to “all of the above” so I apologize if this isn’t the right place. Due to a combination of intentional and unintentional factors I’ve been losing some weight. I tend to be on the cusp between medium and large, and traditionally I size up. But with the recent slimming down I feel like larges are just a tad too large now. This is weird. The diaper looks and feels so much more snug. I’m not used to feeling the tapes (with larges the tapes are over the front panel). So it’s simultaneously thinner and thicker feeling. The real test will be seeing how it holds up.

Chapter Two Fern withered under Aurelia’s glare, and despite being fully clothed, she felt utterly naked. She’d been caught, exposed. Sneaking through her landlady’s private things. It didn’t occur to her that she’d found anything incriminating, that she could accuse Aurelia of anything–in Fern’s mind, her half-formed fantasies may as well have been projected in front of the gorgeous woman before her, and she couldn’t form thoughts beyond her own mortification at being caught. “Aurelia,” Fern began, stammering. “I–I was–” “You were just rooting through my private things,” Aurelia declared, walking forward. She was taller than Fern by half a foot, and her emerald green eyes saw right through Fern’s weak protests. “I let you into my home, I gave you my trust, and you repaid that by spying on me and my girls?” (She knows.) Fern’s throat went dry, and the thought of lying didn’t even cross her mind. She nodded meekly, looking down to avoid the woman’s steely gaze. “Pack your things,” Aurelia whispered, her face only a few inches from Fern’s, her voice quiet and hard, barely concealing her anger. “If you cannot respect me, you are not welcome in my home.” Panic rising, Fern shook her head, stepping back to escape from the woman’s intensity. “No, I–I promise, I wasn’t–I just needed to see!” She couldn’t end up out on the street–she had enough money to get a hotel for a while, and maybe she could find some fleabox apartment to stay in, but… But she didn’t want to leave. “You saw,” Aurelia snapped. “I hope it was worth it.” Fern shook her head again, trying one last time. “Please, Aurelia, I just…when I saw you with your nieces, I…I had to know more. I couldn’t help myself, but I promise it will never happen again, I won’t say a word, I…” Feeling small, she whispered, “I’m begging you.” To her surprise, Aurelia’s face softened by just a degree. Almost smiling, she took a step forward, backing Fern up against the shelf of diapers. “You know, you remind me of my girls.” Fern’s eyes widened. “What do you mean?” “I mean,” Aurelia said, setting her jaw, “that you need someone to teach you a lesson about how to behave properly.” She loomed over Fern, and Fern’s whole body trembled, staring up into Aurelia’s implacable eyes. “If you want to stay,” Aurelia told her, making her words slow and precise so that she could not be misunderstood. “I will need to believe you have learned your lesson, and that you will not break my trust again. You will need me to punish you. Am I understood?” Heart pounding, taking shallow breaths, Fern nodded. “You can ask to stop,” Aurelia continued. “At any time. If you say ‘Red’, I will immediately stop, and your punishment will be over–but if you do so, I expect you to be gone before the end of the day.” Fern nodded again, flushing with fear and anticipation, confusion and anxiety blurring with eagerness she didn’t fully understand. “So, you’re going to take your punishment?” Aurelia concluded. Fern nodded a third time, but that wasn’t good enough. “Be good for me, use your words.” Feeling like she was gasping for air, Fern let the answer tumble out of her mouth, excitement and terror blending as she saw all the implements around her. “I want you to punish me.” Aurelia smiled, showing teeth. “Good. Remove your scrubs, I want to see you.” Hands shaking, Fern never looked away from the woman’s eyes as she worked the buttons of her scrub shirt, letting it fall off her slender shoulders and to the ground. Her pants came next, tugging the waistband over her hips, stretching the elastic past her toned ass until gravity took over and they fell to the floor, exposing bare, athletic legs. Stepping out of the clothes, Fern began to cross her arms over her chest, but Aurelia caught her wrists. “No,” Aurelia warned, sounding pleased as she inspected Fern’s body. “Don’t hide yourself from me.” Lowering her hands to her side, Fern felt butterflies flutter in her chest as Aurelia reached down, undoing her sports bra, revealing firm breasts as the garment fell away. Smirking down at her, Aurelia then moved to Fern’s last layer of clothing, her panties–Fern had chosen a lace pair, pink and delicate, and it wasn’t until this moment that she understood why. She’d wanted this woman to see them. She wanted this woman to take them from her. Aurelia complied, hooking her thumbs into the panties and slowly pulling them down, until they hung around Fern’s ankles, leaving her totally nude in the room full of sex toys. The older woman turned towards her bedroom, strolling with purpose that indicated she expected Fern to follow without question. Fern complied, stepping completely out of her panties, feeling more exposed than ever as she moved into the bedroom proper. Pointing at a spot in the center of the room, Aurelia instructed, “Stand with your hands behind your head. Do not move.” Nodding, Fern stepped up and did as ordered, legs pressed together, frozen in place by the command. “Spread your legs,” Aurelia chided, and Fern obeyed, sinking lower as she pushed her feet apart. Strutting a slow circle around her, Aurelia’s eyes drank in every bit of Fern’s body, from her pert breasts to her smooth, perfect thighs. She reached out, pulling a lock of dark hair over Fern’s shoulder, then squeezing her cheek just to make the girl blush. “You’re beautiful,” Aurelia commented, so confident that it seemed less like a compliment and more like a statement of fact. Stepping behind Fern once again, she ran a fingernail up the girl’s back, starting from her waist and tracing up the small of her back, sending shivers down Fern’s spine. Fern gasped as Aurelia reached up, laced her fingers through Fern’s dark hair and pulled tight, yanking her back in a possessive grip. Lips only inches away from Fern’s ear, Aurelia purred, “I am going to enjoy punishing you.” Wincing and whimpering at the pain in her scalp, Fern found herself unable to respond before Aurelia pulled her to the side, leading her by the hair to the foot of the bed. She yelped, but didn’t even consider asking Aurelia to stop. Using her thick hair as a leash, Aurelia sat on the bed and pulled Fern over her lap, so that her head faced the foot of the bed. She finally let go, but only so that she could take Fern’s slender wrists in her own powerful hand, pinning Fern’s arms to the small of her back so that she could not move or wriggle away. Fern knew what came next. She’d seen it–the gorgeous woman’s hand on the tight, aching bottoms of the girls. And now, she– SMACK! Aurelia’s hand came down on Fern’s bare skin, and she yelped, gasping at the sudden stinging pain. SMACK! A second identical hit came down on her other cheek, leaving identical tenderness behind. She kicked her legs and whimpered. Ten more smacks on each side–each with the same stinging fire and intensity, each making her gasp in paint. It hurt, enough to steal all her focus, so that she could think only about the pain shooting up from her tender cheeks. Pausing for a moment, Aurelia rested her hand on Fern’s bottom, fingernails tracing tiny circles over the tender skin. “There,” she said. Fern sighed in relief. That wasn’t so bad after all, she– “Now you’re warmed up,” Aurelia continued. “And I can start the spanking properly.” Her eyes had time to widen just a fraction before Aurelia drew back and brought her hand down, and Fern realized only then that she’d been holding back. Fire shot up from her ass and she cried out, tears welling up in her eyes. More strikes came down, lightning bolts of pain that didn’t hold back, and Fern began to kick and squirm, body acting involuntarily as she tried to get free of the hold. She couldn’t–Aurelia’s grip was ice and iron, and no amount of squirming could get her off the woman’s lap. Tears began to roll down her face, just as she’d seen on Leah, and she began to beg, though her thoughts were so muddled by pain that she couldn’t form proper words. Babbling, Fern survived the spanking, lasting until Aurelia finally stopped the rain of blows. Even without the assault, her ass was on fire, bright red pain and heat radiating from her, and when a gentle hand rested over her skin, they felt cold and hot all at once. Whimpering, Fern buried her face in the bed, body limp as Aurelia let go of her arms. “Alright,” Aurelia said, calmly, as though instructing a child. “I want you to hold on to the blankets.” Confused but obedient, Fern pulled her arms in front of her, grabbing on. “If you fall off my lap,” Aurelia warned, reaching out to her night stand, though Fern couldn’t see what she picked up. “Or squirm so that I have to stop, we will start over from the beginning. Do you understand?” It took a moment for Fern to follow, to realize what she was being told. (We’re not done.) Swallowing, she grabbed a little tighter onto the blankets, and for Aurelia’s part, she seized Fern’s hair, pulling tight so that Fern was forced to arch her back. WHACK! Fern cried out as something hard struck her–not Aurelia’s hand, but a solid object. Her mind flashed with the array of spanking implements she’d seen, but Aurelia hadn’t brought those with her. She’d taken something from her– WHACK! (It’s her hairbrush,) Fern realized, and that was her last cogent thought before the spanking accelerated to a fever pitch. No more stinging, the new impacts thudded into the meat of her ass, bruising force that never struck in the same place twice, raining down heavy blows that shook her to her core. Fern began to sob, tears flowing freely, the strands of hair not clutched in Aurelia’s grip sticking to her skin as she wailed. At some point Aurelia discarded the hairbrush, reaching down instead for her slipper, a tool that was somehow worse–it flexed, giving it a whip-snap crack with every impact, faster and more brutal than even the brush. She could have ended it. Aurelia gave her that option, but even as Fern reminded herself of the possibility in a fleeting moment of lucidity, she shook it away. Blows rained down until her throat ran dry and her face was streaked with lines from makeup, snot and tears dripping down her nose and chin. The spanking, finally, stopped, and she felt Aurelia’s cool touch against the skin of her back. Fern cried a little longer, breathing heavily, endorphins rushing through her body. She hurt, and yet she felt energized all at the same time, on a terrible precipice, teetering between being able to continue or falling apart completely. “I’m proud of you,” Aurelia whispered. “Shh, little girl. Come here.” Gentle hands guided Fern upright, into a sitting position. Though her bottom ached, burned, stung, felt every miserable pain she could imagine, the soft blankets felt good on her skin, and Aurelia’s touch melted away her worries. She trembled, and Aurelia pulled her into a hug, holding her close. “You’re a good girl,” she praised. “Such a good girl. I didn’t know if you could take it, but you did, so well.” Fern felt a wash of pleasure, goosebumps raising on her skin at the words, body prickling to life. Aurelia’s hug shifted, hands pulling away, and before Fern understood what was happening, she felt fingers against her nipples, brushing and squeezing. Unable to help herself, Fern moaned, pleasure bubbling to the surface at Aurelia’s touch. In just a few seconds, she’d become more turned on than she could remember, just from the gentle, firm, slightly sadistic touch of Aurelia’s fingers on her breasts. Pinching her nipples with one hand, Aurelia’s fingers drifted down, brushing Fern’s sex. She was dripping wet, arousal washing down her thighs, and the parts of her that might have objected were beaten down and too weak to complain. She’d taken her punishment–this was her reward, she’d earned it, and Aurelia’s touch made her moan– “That’s enough,” Aurelia interjected, pulling her hand away, leaving Fern so frustrated she wanted to scream. “Follow me.” Fern was left gasping and exasperated, denied pleasure boiling inside her. Aurelia got to her feet, waiting just a moment for the girl to follow, acting as though she hadn’t just toyed with Fern like her body was remote-controlled. Gathering her senses, Fern scrambled up and after the woman, aware of every motion by how it caused her butt to ache. A stool sat in the luxurious bathroom, waiting for her. First, though, Aurelia passed her a tall glass of water. “Drink. I won’t have you dehydrated from crying.” Fern drank the whole cup in a single long motion. Aurelia’s care energized her, the cool water easing her dry dry throat, and she sighed in relief. When she finished, Aurelia pointed at the stool. “Bend over, and wait.” Fern obeyed, dropping to her knees to do so, kneeling in front of the stool and then bending over so that her body rested atop it, propped up without needing to rely on her arms. The pose left her bottom in the air once more, exposed. Aurelia left her there, returning to the closet of toys, and Fern felt a spike of panic, imagining another spanking, only this time with the canes and paddles she’d seen arranged on that shelf. Little flashes of her nursing experience came to her–it was just blunt tissue damage, bruising. No matter how much it hurt, she wasn’t maimed or permanently injured. She’d likely be left stinging for days, wincing every time she sat, but she hadn’t been hurt in a way that wouldn’t heal, and it was unlikely that even a paddle or cane would cause that sort of damage, not in Aurelia’s careful hands. The idea of another spanking filled her with nervous energy–could she make it through that? Knowing that her body wasn’t in danger, only her pain tolerance and willpower? She wanted to know, and was terrified to try, but she wasn’t going to get another spanking. When Aurelia returned, Fern finally realized why they’d come to the bathroom. The matron stepped around Fern so that the girl could see what she carried: a rubber enema kit and a lengthy hose, the bag larger than the one she’d used on the girls the night before. “We’re going to fill you up,” she warned. “And you will hold it, for fifteen minutes, before you can release. If you let go too soon, we will start over from the beginning.” Fern nodded. “If I can’t hold it, I get another enema,” she confirmed, saying it to herself as much as to Aurelia. “No,” she snapped, crouching to look Fern in the eyes. “We start over from the beginning.” Fern swallowed, fear welling in her eyes as she watched the older woman set to work. Soap and warm water poured into the enema bag until it was half full, which she hung from a shower rod, keeping the nozzle closed for the time being. Turning to move behind Fern, she knelt, searching with the tip of the nozzle. It found its opening, and without any warm up, pushed inside her, filling her up with the length of hard plastic. Fern gasped, and when Aurelia turned the nozzle and released the water, she gasped again. Warmth flowed into her–not hot enough to be a discomfort on its own, but enough that she couldn’t ignore it. She could feel her belly swelling, feel the water stretch her, cramps beginning to assault her as the soapy liquid sloshed inside. Aurelia didn’t do half measures. Seemingly determined to break the girl, she let the water flow until every drop had drained inside the target of her punishment. Fern whimpered, struggling to keep her bowels in check, to keep the enema inside. Cold cramps ran up her body, discomfort from the overfilling, and as the slick nozzle pulled free of her, she almost felt herself lose control then and there. She didn’t–she kept her body in check, though she trembled as she did so. “Get up,” Aurelia told her, unsympathetic to Fern’s discomfort. “Now.” Fern winced as she did so, a hand moving to her belly as the water sloshed inside her. “The corner.” Aurelia pointed. “I want your nose in it until I tell you your time’s up. Remember the consequences for failure, little girl.” Waddling to obey, Fern planted her nose in the cool corner, hands drifting behind her, down to her aching cheeks, wanting to rub away– A hand swatted her tender backside and she yelped, pulling her hands away. “You know better than that,” Aurelia warned. “I–” Fern began to protest, but she was shut down immediately. “Don’t pretend you didn’t watch every second of it. You can’t hide from me. Now, hands behind your head.” Meekly, Fern obeyed, feeling pathetic and small, helpless and in pain, and hopelessly, completely turned on. Aurelia left her there. Fern could hear the woman’s footsteps as she walked out of the bathroom, though the door remained open. At any moment, the older woman could look in and see Fern there, shaking, struggling with the cramps that her soapy enema racked her with, but Fern could not see back, she could only see her own eyes reflected in the smooth, glassy tile wall. She couldn’t deny anything, not to herself, and not to Aurelia, either: She had wanted this. She had craved this. When she saw what was done to the girls, she’d imagined herself in their place, and knew she had to find out what it felt like. Sure, she had the practical motivation–to make it through her punishment and keep her home–but that barely factored into her thoughts anymore. And now, she did, and while she fought to contain the enema that swelled her belly, she found herself dripping, so turned on that she could have climaxed in seconds had she free reign of her body. Even then, she was tempted to reach down and finger herself, but the fear of Aurelia’s watchful eyes froze her and kept her obedient. Seconds dripped by, heartbeats, where she could do nothing except stew in her humiliation, her aches, her stinging pains, and her arousal. She had taken more than she imagined, and yet she wanted more. She wanted– “Is something wrong?” Aurelia asked, behind her, coming from nowhere. Fern squeaked and shook her head. “N-no ma’am!” “Your legs are shaking,” Aurelia explained, stepping forward, grabbing Fern’s ass cheeks with both hands and squeezing. “It’s as though you’re struggling.” Fern whimpered, pain shooting back to life at the woman’s touch, terrified at the thought of losing control. “P-please…” Laughter like silver bells rang in Fern’s ears, and Aurelia whispered, “Your time is up. You can empty yourself and clean up, then I have so much more to do to you.” ... The final chapter of this story is already up in early access for my subscribers! Plus a buncha other early access and exclusive content! Your support helps me write ❤️ https://reamstories.com/peculiarchangelingabdl/ https://subscribestar.adult/peculiarchangeling

Looks like a pacifier addict. https://pacifieraddict.com/

Hey everyone! Sorry for the late posting, but family birthday celebrations and getting sick right after does not make for the best of editing mindsets. For perspective, I wrote the final little bit of this chapter last night, and despite being only about three paragraphs long, it took me almost 40 minutes. Oh well, but the nice thing is that due to a few plans being pushed or cancelled, I should be able to pop out several more chapters in a row. If everything goes how I want it to, this story should be complete by next week sometime. And for those wondering or just reading about the Diaper Dimension, just to clarify, in the DD, it’s often canon for Bigs to go a little crazy with their Littles once they begin to bond with them. Breastfeeding only speeds this process up, and I know most of my caregivers have been nice to their Littles in past stories, but they are usually the exception to the rule. So, before anyone goes to think that Nancy was replaced with a robot or something like that, she was a good person, but bonding with Emma has brought out her more negative personality. I clarify about a few things in this chapter and the next few, so just keep reading and questions will be answered. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 11: Life Can Be Both Terrible and Fun Sometimes A battle had begun in the one place that was supposed to be safe. After so long fighting with mainly Nurse Bee, she was now gone, and Nancy had resorted to other methods to fill in the gaps of her absence. The ‘Tanassum’ crate had contained enough FOY to last up to a year and my nightly absorption of the lighthouse all took its toll on me. If it wasn’t for my renewed progress at the daycare, I had no doubt that I would have ended up back in the Burrows room once more by now. So, yes, I was at least grateful that I wasn’t locked-in as I once was, but now, my progress seemed to yo-yo based on the time of day. In the late nights and early mornings, I was losing progress. Concepts became simpler and lessons just learned seemed to vanish in a puff. During the day though, I surged ahead and struggled to relearn and hold onto what I could. It was exhausting, but I knew I just couldn’t give up. Not now after I had been through so much already. Maybe ten years ago, I probably would have just sunk into the muck of the fate that Nancy now clearly wanted for me. I knew it was her hormones playing havoc with her personality on one level, but that existence didn’t appeal to me whatsoever. So fortunately for me, in recent years with movements like the pro-Little societies cropping up everywhere, more Bigs were becoming amenable to keeping Littles safe. And, while nothing is a guarantee in this society, I felt that Nancy was pushing her luck with how she was treating me. I felt that it was just a matter of time until something happened to change my life, but until then, I just had to endure the cycle. Being Sunday, the weekend cycle was much worse than those days when I went to daycare. There was no reprieve for me or surge of my faculties. From Friday afternoon to Monday morning, it was all FOY shots, lighthouse trances, and Nancy’s little games with me. The games had begun when Nurse Bee was around, but Nancy had amped them to a completely different level now. Anything I did was scrutinized and either praised or punished, accumulating or being doled out right on the spot. Sometimes this meant that I could receive a treat or a massive spanking at night, but both boiled down to just how much of a Little I acted like. It didn’t take long for me to try and emulate being the best Little I could around her, whether I liked it or not. “Morning, baby,” Nancy said deceptively sweetly as she flicked on my nursery lights and came over to me. Her tone was very sweet, it always was in the mornings lately, but I knew by now it was only that way due to her satisfaction that she knew that now would likely be the time I was most regressed for the whole day. As a result of the lighthouse and some lingering effects from nursing from her the previous night, all I really could manage to say back, was “Na-eee,” in my attempt to call out her name and just proceed with the day. She knew what I was trying to say, but she wanted to milk my current state for all it was worth. “Oh? I didn’t quite catch that, honey. I think someone’s just a little too little right now to form any big girl words, huh? Oh well! Mommy’s got you, baby. Let mommy fix everything, okay?” I remained motionless and silent as Nancy soon picked me up and hauled me over to the changing table. Nancy referring to herself as my ‘mommy’ only occurred in private, but it still bugged me. There was a reason she kept that type of name private as technically, she was still only my caregiver based on state law. She hadn’t adopted me, and with some of the new laws, portal Littles couldn’t be immediately adopted anymore. I still had to be under her care for another month at least until something like that occurred. So, until then, she should have just referred to herself as ‘Nancy’ to me. As I was laid down on the changing table and Nancy began to undo my sleeper from last night to get at my likely heavily soiled diaper, I knew the only exception to the general ‘mommy rule’ was if I referred to her as such, as Nancy referring to herself as my ‘mommy’ was considered a breach of consent. Even in this messed up society, consent was getting to be an important notion for factors like that. So, as such, a regressed Little commenting themselves over the title of their caregiver was just seen as cute. “Oh my!” Nancy exclaimed as she began to peel back the layer of my onesie to reveal my diaper underneath. “Someone’s got a smelly tushie. Yes they do! Yes they do!” I squirmed in discomfort over the notion of my once again heavily soiled diaper. Our nightly nursing sessions had essentially pulverized any hope I had of ever getting out of diapers again by now, and part of me had even accepted that, but I still hated how Nancy always made sure to emphasize it. She then patted my butt, and I could just make out the squish down there. “Ooh! Someone made a big old messy for mommy to clean up. I bet you can’t even really feel that though anymore, can you? Can you even smell it anymore?” She grinned and knew full-well that I couldn’t anymore. It didn’t even take long, but when one’s diaper is nearly constantly wet and those types of smells just become your everyday world, one has very little choice but to get used to them. “I’ll take that as a no, huh? Just like a little baby…” I squirmed in hatred of the woman above me and just willed the time away as she proceeded to change my diaper. It was so strange how I once held her in such esteem, and her hormones causing the change or not, I knew she had crossed a line a long time ago. I doubted that I ever really could forgive her for still trying to turn me back to how I used to be. Regardless, some quick wipes and Nancy soon popped me over to the bath. I could at least feel my limbs and neurons firing back again, so I wasn’t fearful of drowning like I used to be but being so naked and scrubbed thoroughly by Nancy with my bath, it was still one of my least favorite activities. I think by now I would probably kill someone or eat the vilest of mush in exchange if I could just be able to luxuriate during a bath once more in life. Instead, I was stuck with the rough-scrubbing Nancy who made sure to still comment on my helplessness and babyish lifestyle every chance she could. Still, the moment was soon over, and after a quick rediapering back in my nursery, Nancy selected out a multi-colored checkered summer dress that barely went down to my knees. Between the high waist and billowing shorter hem of the dress, I knew full well that it would practically be a miracle if I didn’t flash my diapers off at least once today. My only consolation with the outfit though was the frilled straps at the top and the small white sandals she then attached to my feet. Being a Sunday, I knew the park was a guaranteed trip and I knew that I at least wouldn’t be sweating all day. With a little peck on my forehead, Nancy then picked me up and carried me downstairs to my awaiting highchair for breakfast. Of all her new little habits with me at home, this was actually one I didn’t mind too much. When I was just walking about normally, the stairs were a pain, but doable. Now, with my less than stellar coordination and balance plus the addition of my thick diaper, the stairs were one difficulty that I was just happy to avoid now in my life. And that’s I think why all this rubbed me the wrong way. See, my time in this dimension had a severe and profound impact on my life. Whether I wanted it originally or not, I knew that things would never be the same. My attention span had definitely dropped, my reading ability was still subpar, and my potty training… well, there was none. So, I knew I needed help in my life now, but Nancy didn’t want to help me. I mean I guess on one level she did, but she more wanted to control or dominate me now. If she only assisted me in life and occasionally held my hand when I got scared, I would be okay with that type of existence, but scenes like the one at breakfast showed me that she just wanted more power over me. “Open wide, baby. Let Mommy feed you your num-nums this morning,” she tempted me as she waved the purple rubbed coated spoon in front of me, now loaded with a heaping of peach and spinach. The peach addition made it bearable, but Nancy’s baby talk to me made this one of the low points in my day. On the other hand, I knew if I didn’t comply, my bottom would soon find itself red and blistered from even the guaranteed spanking that would follow. Not seeing any other option, I opened my mouth to accept the revolting mush that was my breakfast. “Oh, that’s it. Someone wants to be mommy’ best behaved little girl, huh?” She scooped inside the jar again. “Now, open up for mommy again, baby.” I complied with her demands again, and so the routine went. She would command and I would obey. For someone like the new Nancy, this power dynamic seemed to almost thrill her to no end. For me, it was torture, but for her, it was a game. Often, she would even ‘accidentally’ miss my mouth and smear it with the goop or have it land back down on my now ever-present bib. “All done!” Nancy finally announced as I swallowed the last of the revolting mixture. She then produced a baby wipe and roughly removed the remaining residue over my mouth. “Stop squirming Emma, or should I get Mister Spanky out again?” she asked, her eyes quickly turning fiery, using her name for ‘big sting.’ Not wanting to give her another excuse to punish me, I quickly shook my head and then remained absolutely still. Nancy smiled back wickedly. “That’s a good girl for mommy. Isn’t it just so much easier to do what I say?” I didn’t say a word, but in my head, I just wanted to fight back with all I had. I wanted to leave Nancy for good by now, but for the life of me, I didn’t know how. So, as a result, any hope of escape or transfer to another caregiver was fading a little more with each passing day. My stomach soon wretched as it digested the mush that had been deposited there. Nancy picked me up and plopped me in the baby bouncer she had erected in the family room for me. I could toddle around inside it, but I absolutely hated how my diaper rode up right where I didn’t want it to. Nancy turned on the TV and then looked back at me. “Okay, baby. You finish this bottle and watch your show while mommy goes and eats and cleans in the kitchen. Just cry if you need anything.” Not expecting a response and likely even hoping that I would cry for her, she left the bottle in front of me and retreated back to the kitchen. I quickly began to down the milky substance before me. Despite the mixture being presented in a baby bottle, I eagerly took it to wash down all the filth that remained in mouth. The grainy texture and odd combination of the baby food from my breakfast was a lot to take in at once, but the bottle, filled with who knows what, was at least a tiny reprieve. My stomach soon bloated, and I knew that my currently at least relatively clean diaper wouldn’t last much longer. A short time later, Nancy was finished in the kitchen, and I was done with my bottle. As she prepared for our traditional outing to the park, where Nancy would meet with some of the other strict caregivers she had met since her new persona had emerged, I sat back and watched more of Princess Poppy. Now, I was at least glad I could follow the story plots more than I once did. Before my shot at the zoo, I would only understand about half of it, and my attention would quickly deviate. Lately, it had been one of my few mercies here at home away from Nancy where I could just forget all my troubles, even if only for a moment. “Okay, baby. Daylight is wasting! Come on!” In seconds, Nancy plucked me out of my bouncer and placed me in my new stroller before heading outside. She had purchased the contraption after I started moving around more. Before, she was often too busy, and I was too immobile to really go outside safely. Now, she wanted to show me off to the other caregivers at the park. Since I got freedom out of it, I never put up a fuss, despite the infantile look that Nancy had heaped upon me within moments. Arriving at the park, Nancy unstrapped me and let me run about a little bit. I wasn’t exactly sure of her plan today, but as my bowels clenched and I dropped on all fours, that wasn’t the case anymore. Her plan was simple but effective as my diaper soon sagged and ballooned outward as I messed myself helplessly. Sadly, while before I would have whimpered or even cried, I knew I had no control whatsoever now, so dirtying my diapers was just part of my routine now. I just braced for the embarrassment I knew was sure to come. “Awww, look at that. Babygirl’s makin’ a messy right in her diapie,” Nancy cooed at me as she looked on with a look of absolute glee. She had to clean me up and that was always a nice consolation, but once again, I knew she wouldn’t afford me any dignity in it either as I saw her set the changing mat right on top of the picnic table. As I finished and Nancy soon retrieved me from the ground, I thought back to all the times I once protested this type of treatment. While I always detested the changing stalls, they at least afforded me some privacy. Being out here in the open, I knew that anyone watching would forever identify me as a helpless baby. I guess to some extent I was now, but privacy was something my at least somewhat adult mind still craved. It was one of the few things that I gained back after the shot from Omega Force that I had not enjoyed. A flip up of my short dress and the scritching of the tapes on my diapers was my cue to shut my eyes and just block everything out. Nancy would try to take every opportunity to clean me up and humiliate me as much as possible while she changed my diaper. Closing my eyes though got everything done relatively quickly. If they were open however, Nancy was sure to show me my previously loaded diaper and belittle me as nothing but a baby with her evidence prominently displayed before me. I didn’t want to give her that satisfaction. “Oh! What a big load you deposited!” Nancy exclaimed as she unfolded my diaper down and lifted my legs high to begin the wiping process. Closing my eyes prevented some humiliation, but Nancy’s persistence still shone through more often than I would like. “Such a smelly, smelly little baby I have on my hands. Good thing I got these extra absorbent diapers for you, huh?” I didn’t respond back, and by now, I knew that Nancy didn’t expect me to either. It was almost a bargain between us of sorts, and it was one I respected to the letter. Less interactions with her meant less ammo she could use on me later if I ever made a mistake or broke one of her numerous rules. Still, her heavy use of creams and baby powders didn’t go unnoticed by me, but I just endured it all as she soon wrapped me back up in a thick diaper and helped me sit up. I opened my eyes and was just thankful a crowd hadn’t gathered around this week. Last Sunday, I couldn’t say the same, but from the group of Bigs I had seen Nancy with last week, that possibility had only been a near miss as they were approaching once more. I wondered if Nancy was disappointed that she couldn’t humiliate me in that way this week. It was a small victory to disrupt her likely plans, but it was still something for my fragile mind to hold onto in this world. Sensing the others coming over and the likelihood of them making my life difficult, I knew I had to take my shot in escaping first. “Nancy? Can I go expwowin?” Nancy looked up from her reorganization of my pink diaper bag and gave me a look that almost seemed to scream ‘no.’ Determined though, I added, “It’ll jus’ be neawby. I pwomise.” Nancy sighed but ultimately nodded her head. “Okay, baby. Not too far. Don’t go beyond the playground on one side or the hill on the other. Got it?” I quickly nodded in acceptance of the nice but relatively small area she had give me to work with today. She then helped me off the picnic table, but before I could toddle off and to my freedom, Nancy grasped my shoulder and spun me back around to face her. “No wondering off, Emma. I mean it. Don’t tempt my patience today if you know what’s good for your bum tonight.” I quickly nodded and just as her friends arrived, she smiled and let me go. It was just in the nick of time too as I saw many of the pro-Big women begin to gather around and gossip with Nancy. “Oh my! Did the little miss dirty her britches?” “I don’t understand why you let her run off like that. Immobile Littles are so much better!” “Ever think of taking her to the doctor and getting a few modifications done? I’ve heard it’s all the rage now in Atlanta!” Each of their comments froze me to my core. Seeing their Littles one day was enough to send anyone into a depression of their own. Having been here for years under their sadistic rule, most, if not all, were heavily scarred and mentally regressed. If any of them knew their names, I would have been surprised. So, wanting to stay as far or as out of sight of them as I could, I soon ducked behind some bushes. “Emma…” I spun around and tried to look for the source of where the faint, but clear, noise had come from. For a moment, I thought I was going crazy, but I heard it again. “Emma… go in the bushes, Emma… Don’t worry about Nancy, Emma… Follow my voice.” Okay, now before this world, I would have either been adamantly against going or just straight up run away from something like that happening to me. In a world of seemingly magical stuffy’s, adults being treated like babies, and portal travel though, my imagination and trust of the unexplained or odd was never higher. So, curious, I followed the voice a little more until I came to a different bush a little closer to the playground this time. I then parted some of the branches in front of me and walked into the bush. Inside was cramped for a moment, but to my surprise, the untangled space of the interior soon grew bigger to the point where I could have probably almost stood up. Instead, two clusters of odd-looking leaves and twigs turned around. “Hello, Emma. How are you today?” “Bree!” I shouted in relief over seeing the commander of Omega Force once again. I felt I owed her everything in gaining my mind and many of my abilities back in such a short period of time. The daycare would have eventually worked, but their shot gave me the edge I had needed over Nancy’s sinister plans for me now. “It’s good to see you again, Emma,” she said smiling at me, her camo outfit slightly rustling in the breeze passing through the bush right then. “I see you’ve taken well to our shot… though… maybe not as well as we might have hoped you would have by now.” “All in the clear, ma’am” Martinez noted behind her. He too wore a complete camo suit as he listened in on his radio and used a camera clearly perched above the bush likely to keep an eye on other Bigs and even Nancy for me. “Thank you, Martinez.” She then turned back to me. “So, what’s happening? Can you report anything since we last met?” I nodded and explained everything about what had happened since the zoo. “… an’ Nancy has jus’ been getting’ mo’ nasty to me evuh since Nuwse Bee lef’ an’ then gave her the dwugs.” “Hmmm…” Bree mused. “Our reports said the same, but do you remember the drug she gave to Nancy, and that I’m assuming is now being given to you?” I nodded again. “Yes. Ih was FOY.” I could tell that Bree instantly recognized the name. “I’m sorry to hear that. That stuff is nasty to any Little taking it. Very potent and even a street drug in some forms. I honestly think it’s a minor miracle you haven’t gone permanently over the edge if she’s really injecting you with it every night… and you said nursing as well?” I nodded. “Geez. You must be very tough or have a guardian in your corner somewhere to have been so resistant to all that muck.” I thought back to my magical stuffy, Patch. I knew he had to be behind my near miraculous continued recovery since Nancy had begun her evil work on me. I couldn’t prove it and every time I told someone about him, they just laughed. So, I just stopped telling people directly or even caring about the why at this point. I really just cared that it still happened and kept me sane against what Nancy was doing to me. As long as Patch remained my stuffy at daycare, I felt I was still at least somewhat safe. “And you said earlier that you weren’t sure where Nurse Bee had gone off to?” Bree asked after a moment fo entering a few things into the computer on her wrist. I nodded. “Yeah… jus’ some pwace called Jimbo? Jingles? Juvenile?” My memory was still spotty in places unfortunately. “Wait,” Bree stopped me in mid-sentence. “Do you mean Juventas?” I quickly nodded and Bree’s face lit up. “That’s wonderful, Emma. That’s good work. Very helpful for our other branches to track her down.” I felt so happy to be receiving praise for once outside of the daycare lately. I used to get new compliments and praise all the time from Nancy, but that hadn’t happened in so long unless I had done something particularly babyish. It was still better than her alternative attitude toward me, but not by much, especially when one of those instances was me helplessly going potty in my diaper. “Boss…” Martinez started up, while still watching the little device in front of them. “Nancy has started to look around. I don’t think we have very long.” Bree nodded at her communications specialist and then turned back to me. “I know all this is difficult Emma, but I just want you to hold on. We’re trying to see if we can find a way all around this where we can get you safely out from Nancy at this point, but we keep hitting some roadblocks.” I sighed, but it was still some bit of hope. “Danks fo’ at weas twyin’.” Bree smiled and rubbed my shoulder. “I know all this must be challenging to deal with, and it’s even harder now that Nancy is in her Big psychosis state of mind,” she explained. “It’s not recognized officially yet, but Bigs hormones can go crazy after they bond with their chosen Little. It can radically change their personality, and while some become only kinder and more caring, others can become stricter and more controlling. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you which Nancy has become…” Sadly, no, she did not. Bree then shifted and I could tell that her and Martinez soon had to leave. “You’re doing good work for us, Emma. We’ll work the problem on our end and find you a way out of this if we can.” I wanted to remain strong in front of her, a fellow Little who even pust most Bigs to shame, but it was hard considering Nancy’s strong negative influence in my life. “Iss jus’ weally, weally hawd. I wan’ to be stwong, buh… I jus’ don’ dink dewe’s a way ou’ anymo’…” Bree smiled sympathetically and rubbed my shoulder again. “Have some faith, Emma. There’s always a way out with these things given enough time, but you need to stay strong until then, okay? Can you do that for me?” It took everything I had, but I eventually nodded. “Emma! Emma! Where are you?” I heard Nancy shout angrily from nearby outside the bushes. I turned to see what was happening to see if she was close by but when I looked back at Bree and Martinez, both had vanished into the wild once more. Now determined to be seen again to possibly prevent a future spanking, I crawled out of the bush again. Curiously, there was a ball in the bush that hadn’t been there before. ‘I wonder… did Bree give me this?’ I shrugged my shoulders and soon emerged on the other side with it tightly clutched in one of my hands. Nancy was frantically looking around and soon spotted me. “And just what do you think you’re doing, huh? I couldn’t find you!” She then grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer. “I asked you a question, Emma. Where were you?” My legs trembled, but still holding the ball I had found, I lifted it up to show her my alibi. “My baw… it wolled away…” I tried to make myself look as innocent as possible, and while at first, I wasn’t sure if my ploy was even going to work, Nancy soon backed off. “Hmmm… I’ll give you a strike one for that instead of punishing you today. You better ask me before you disappear again, or you’ll be in a world of hurt. Got it?” I quickly nodded my head before she let me go and walked back off to her cheering and smiling Big friends. Each had seen what had just happened and each seemed proud of Nancy for how she handled it all. ‘Monsters…’ I then walked off and sighed. I wanted to fight back and tell her that she was being ridiculous, but I had quickly learned that was about the second biggest mistake I could have made, beyond running away from home. Any fight in me that Nancy saw was always sure to be smothered out in the most brutal of spankings when I got home. So, determined not to get any more strikes today, I toddled over to the swings and sat down. I wasn’t alone however, for very long. “Heyya. You o’ay?” a Little asked as he sat down next to me. His dark hair and green eyes were very striking, and his tannish white bunny was also very distinctive. I had seen him in daycare before, but he was considered one of the more leveled-out Littles now and had been assigned to the Oasis room with the others like that. I really could only nod my head, but he seemed deadest on trying to help me. “Imma Chawwee… I seen you befo’ at daycaeh.” He then extended his hand out that wasn’t holding tightly onto his large stuffed bunny. I nodded and shook his hand. “Emma. I seen you awoun’ befo’ as well…” We then started to talk for a while, but not long after, the woman Big I had usually seen him with came right over, smiling the whole way. Unlike Nancy now, she was dressed a little more plainly, but there was an intelligence and kindness in her eyes that was unmistakably that clearly marked her as a bonded Big with Charley. From what Bree had told me though, I felt absolutely confident in saying her bonding had manifested the kinder and more caring version though. “Heya Charley,” she said cheerily to her Little. “You and Hop make a new friend today?” Charley nodded enthusiastically and I felt good knowing I had made another friend here as well. “Yeah! Dis is Emma, Mommy. She’s wiff, uh, Nancy… Dat one fwom da ottuh day…” The woman’s eyes grew big, and it was clear that Nancy’s poor reputation now in the daycare had been spreading. Her morning searches of the daycare for bugs and devices blocking my regression were becoming the gossip of town. Some seemed to admire her while others thought she was crazy. It was clear which category Monica fell into. So, it wasn’t exactly surprising when “Oh…” was about all she could say. It made feel so low being associated with Nancy lately, and I guess it showed on my face. The woman’s own quickly became sympathetic and she crouched down and extended her own hand out to me. “Hello Emma. I’m Monica.” I smiled and shook her hand back. “Goo’ ta mee’ you, Monica.” I wasn’t really sure what to say after that though, but I could see that both Monica and Charley were thinking something together. Finally, Monica broke. “I know the type of Big Nancy is, and I’m sorry if I’m speaking out of turn here, but are you okay? Do you need help or anything like that maybe?” Now I really didn’t know what to say. I could lie and go on my merry way, or I could tell the truth and face the consequences. Foster care and being put up for adoption were best case scenarios in that case, but after rumors that Nancy did nothing to stop, I was nearly convinced that any failures or rejected candidates were shipped off to Garden State Hospital. For perspective, Nancy would have seemed like a blessing compared to that truly terrible place. So, determined not to have that happen, I shook my head. “No… I’m okay... dank you dough…” Neither seemed convinced, but Monica sighed and seemed determined to get me to smile. “Well, let’s see if we can’t turn that frown upside down.” Without warning, she immediately started making fun faces at me. Charley soon joined in and wasn’t as good, but in minutes, I was howling with laughter from their sheer silliness. After a little bit, Monica finally seemed satisfied and stood up before rubbing Charley’s back. “Okay, hun. I’m going to start packing up, but I just wanted to give you the warning that we’re going to need to leave soon to get to that play you wanted to see tonight.” “Da one wiff aww da puppets?” he asked, his voice full of hope and excitement. It was almost hard to even remember those feelings anymore. Monica chuckled. “That’s right, sweetie. You just keep talking to Emma for now though.” Her eyes seemed to arc up and down a little bit as if there was some kind of inside secret between them, and while I was a little sad to be left out, I just continued to try and swing. Monica then left and Charley and I got to talking. First, I just had to know about the Oasis room, and apparently, it was completely magical in all its technology and theme. The room was actually two and was split into two themes. The main Oasis room was essentially just a beach and jungle theme with several water features built into the flooring and walls hidden behind a near transparent glass of some kind. Cubbies and other bits of furniture were adorned like jungle trees or rocks and beautiful flowers grew everywhere. Then, for naptime, the lights were turned off and everything changed to an under the sea theme. Trees became coral sprouts and grassy rocks soon looked like they were sunken beneath the waves. I wanted so badly to go, but I knew that would be a long time away… if ever. “So, Hop, huh?” I asked pointed to his ever-present stuffed bunny. For a moment, I thought I swore that I saw him look right at me, and I briefly wondered if he was magical too like Patch was, but Charley spoke back up to answer my question. “Yeah… he’s wike one of bestess fwien’s. He’s jus’ da bes!” Charley then paused and looked over at me with first suspicion and then an odd curiosity. “Don’ you have one?” I quickly thought to Patch waiting back at the daycare for me to return to him. It was utterly ridiculous on one level, but no matter how hard I tried to act mature, I just couldn’t let him go. “He’s… back at the daycaeh…” “Oh…” Charley said, now seeming a little guilty. “You should ask Mrs. Giwwies abou’ gettin’ him to take home wiff you… dey weally can help out a lot… especiawy if youw sad an’ aww…” I nodded. “He’s jus’ so gweat! He’s a doggy and even had widdle wightnin’ bolts on his wegs…” Charley suddenly became confused and then angry. “I used ta have a doggy wik dat too… I woss him…” “Oh no!” I couldn’t believe my ears that a fellow Little could lose their stuffy. I wanted to run off and form a search party immediately. Fortunately, Charley stopped me just as I was getting up. “Iss o’ay, Emma. He was a bad dog anyways…” His once angry demeanor quickly turned to sadness. I didn’t like to normally pry, but still, I just had to know what he was talking about. See, with my magical stuffy, I thought Patch would never be bad in his life. His job was to protect and just be there for me. Like with all stuffy’s… ‘Right?’ Curious, I couldn’t keep it in any longer. “Wha’ do you mean by dat?” Charley sighed and almost seemed on the verge of tears. “He… he huwt me… wike Nancy an’ you. Mommy told me aftuh she foun’ out. By da time we dih… I didn’ even wan’ him back, so no sadness fo’ me. Buh fo’ you, jus’ be caewful…” I nodded but I knew that Patch would never do something like that to me. We shared a bond, and he was practically my guardian in daycare and in my life now. “I’ll wemembuh dat fo’ Patch…” Charley quickly got a look of confusion. “Wai… my doggy was named Dash. It can’t be him, buh’ that iss his name… o’ at weas ih was…” So, with both of us eventually agreeing that it was just another stuffy entirely ‘Right?’, I had a revelation about Charley. He wasn’t the smartest or the nimblest of us Littles, but he had something that others around here sorely had a burning desire for: hope for the future. I knew I had a lot to do in order to figure out the system still and get to where Charley was at in order to have fun in this life. His circumstances were also definitely different than mine, but I also felt I just had to make sure that I avoided all the obstacles wherever possible on the way to that new dream of mine. That was the hope inside of me trying to breakthrough, but there was another side to all this as well I just couldn’t ignore. As we both swung on the playground, for a moment, I had felt a tiny ray of hope in my fight against the dictatorship that had now become my life. Speaking of which though, I then saw Nancy glaring at me as she quickly stomped over to us sitting on the swings. Seeing my time was short, I eased on back into my swing with the push to just enjoy this time as much as I could. So, for now, I just leaned back in my seat and went higher and higher. Seconds later, I was all laughter and joy with my new friend at the park. Life often didn’t come with such surprises as finding a new friend out here, so I just hoped that my nice feeling would last for as long as it could. Considering what was likely to come, I remembered back to what Bree had told me, and eagerly waited for the right time to flee or to stay strong and hopeful as I waited for Omega Force to help me out in their own way. Nancy still loomed in my life, but no matter what happened later tonight though, I was just glad I had met Charley and Hop. It wasn’t even for long in retrospect, but again, it was that tiny something that I felt made my whole life now just a little more bearable. I wasn’t sure what was next, but considering the fiery hatred seething in Nancy’s eyes as she stomped over to our location at the swings, I knew there would likely be another punishment in my future tonight. I just hoped I could hold on a little longer before something truly terrible and permanent happened to me.

Chapter Three Fern leaned against the sink, exhausted and yet buzzing with nervous energy. The tingling aftereffects of her enema still sent the occasional shiver up her spine, and warmth still radiated from the brutal spanking she’d received. Aurelia had devastated her, and yet, she wanted more. The woman–it didn’t feel right to think of Aurelia as just, Aurelia, her name felt too casual, and thinking of her as ‘the landlady’ didn’t feel quite right either–had called this a punishment, and it was. Fern ached, but all the same, she thrilled. Aurelia walked back in, stepping behind Fern, standing over her. They made eye contact in the mirror. Fern, makeup and snot still streaking her face from the spanking, eyes red and full of need, hair frizzy and tangled from being groped and grabbed. Aurelia, clean and perfect, somehow remaining aloof from the grime. She didn’t look like she’d expended any effort at all when she devastated Fern’s body, again and again. “You’re doing well,” Aurelia said, reaching past Fern towards the sink. She picked up a washcloth, dampening it with warm, clean water, and began to wipe gently at Fern’s face. It didn’t take long–a few gentle strokes of the cloth, to wipe away the sweat and makeup, leaving Fern refreshed. Then, picking up the cup, she filled it with water, raising it to Fern’s lips, guiding the girl to drink. Cool, refreshing water ran down her throat, giving her strength to keep going. It felt impossible that such torment and such tenderness could come from the same woman, and yet, if anything, the former only enhanced the latter–in that moment, Aurelia dominated Fern’s world, the source of all her pain and all her gentle, soothing comfort. Once Fern’s care was complete, Aurelia stepped away. Turning, she pointed again to the stool on the floor. “Bend down.” Fern’s eyes widened, and she started to say, “B–” She caught herself before she could finish the word and land herself in further trouble. Dropping to her knees, she bent over the stool, planting her palms on the cool bathroom tile and taking deep breaths to prepare. “The first one was a warm up,” Aurelia explained, “To clean you out. Are you ready for your real enema?” (Real?) Fern’s eyes widened and she squirmed, butt wriggling, giving the woman above her a show. She couldn’t see the bag as it filled up, but she heard the water run, rushing into the bag, and it seemed to stretch on for far too long. (How much is she filling it?) Fern thought, squirming in her panic. When Aurelia told her to hold still, she held still, allowing the nozzle to press deep inside her body. An involuntary moan escaped her lips, and her cheeks burned as she found pleasure in the shame. “The same rules apply,” Aurelia added, as the water began to flow. “Once you’re full, you will hold it for fifteen minutes before releasing.” Fern nodded, taking deep breaths. She didn’t know if she could make it, not really, but she had to try. As more warm water rushed inside her, though, filling her, swelling her belly, a second moan escaped her lips, and she felt moisture dribble down her thighs. The enema hose hadn’t leaked, the wetness came from in front, her pussy dripping with arousal. She heard a sound behind her, a wordless noise of approval from Aurelia’s throat, and her pleasure only deepened. When the interminable flow of warmth stopped, Aurelia gave her a few moments to catch her breath, then removed the nozzle. Fern struggled, holding herself closed, knees shaking as she withstood the water sloshing around. Fingers closed around her hair, and Aurelia towed Fern to her feet, turning her body to face the mirror once more. From a few steps back, Fern could see her own naked body clearly, belly distended from the water, nipples standing hard on her chest, forced to stand upright by Aurelia’s tight grip. “Are you enjoying yourself?” Aurelia asked. Fern nodded, feeling pressure on her hair as she did so. “You enjoy feeling desperate? Struggling for control of yourself?” As Fern nodded a second time, Aurelia’s hands drifted over her, two fingers pinching her nipples, while two more slid down between her legs, teasing her clit with delicate pressure. Even distracted by the enema, struggling to stand upright and keep her bowels in control, Fern gasped. “Please!” “Please, what?” Aurelia asked, teasing faster, pinching and twisting little circles on Fern’s hard nipples, the pleasure threatening Fern’s control over the enema sloshing inside her. “Do you really think you deserve a reward?” Fern shook her head, realizing she would be denied no matter what she said and not wanting to get herself in further trouble. “N-no, I–oh!” “Good,” Aurelia whispered with deep intensity, fingers working faster, rubbing against Fern’s clit. “You’re right, you don’t. You only get this because I want it.” In only seconds, Fern exploded with ecstasy, knees trembling as she squirted into Aurelia’s fingers, sex dribbling down her thighs. She had to struggle to contain the enema, whole body trembling with effort, but that only made the pleasure more intense, fighting with everything she had to experience the bliss and ward off the humiliation in one moment. She moaned without restraint, leaning against the sink for support, chest heaving as she rode it out. Aurelia’s hands retreated, giving one last pinch to Fern’s tender bottom before she stepped away. “Fifteen more minutes,” she said. “Your time only starts once you get in the corner.” Fern caught her breath a moment longer, nodding to show that she’d heard. It was a struggle to move–every step made her feel like she might explode, losing control of the enema inside her, but she made it, pressing her face into the corner. Despite the increased volume of the enema, Fern found that the character of her holding hadn’t become as insurmountable as she’d expected. The encouragement and praise had bolstered her, and her body had already grown more accustomed to the struggles and discomfort she put it through. While the cramps were worse than ever, and she could feel the added weight in pounds sloshing inside her, she could persist. Fern laced her fingers behind her head, took deep, slow breaths, and challenged herself to make it. Even then, a tiny part of her wanted to fail–to see if Aurelia would follow through with her threat to start from the beginning. That terrified her, and excited her, but she felt that it wouldn’t be right. It had been a threat, not an offer, and she wouldn’t abuse the system in such a way. She would be good for Aurelia, she would do as she was told. She thought she heard Aurelia leave, but she didn’t cheat or break. She obeyed, keeping her hands in place, until the woman returned. Finally, she heard Aurelia call to her. “Your time is up. You can relieve yourself, then come to me.” It was a struggle to get on the toilet in time–she’d managed to brace herself in position, but shuffling three steps and sitting down nearly broke her control. Finally, though, the cramps vanished, leaving her feeling empty and exhausted. When she wandered into the master bedroom, dazed but ready for more, she found a white pad spread out on the floor, long enough for her to lay down. A single diaper sat next to the pad, with wipes, powder, and baby oil next to it, all arranged with an obvious purpose. Fern didn’t question, and she didn’t need instructions. She dropped to her knees and then to her hands, crawling forward towards the mat. Laying down, she turned, facing up at Aurelia’s tender smile. “You’re learning,” she praised, smiling as she knelt by Fern. The wet wipes were slightly warm to the touch, prepared for this, and she ran them across Fern’s skin with a delicate tenderness, wiping away any residue from the enema, any sweat from her many punishments, any grime. “Lift,” she instructed, and Fern raised her body so that the wipes could reach beneath her, cleaning her tender, bruised bottom. Fern’s legs trembled slightly from holding herself up, but she waited obediently while Aurelia picked up the diaper, unfolded it, and ran a finger along the inner leg guard to straighten it properly before sliding it beneath the girl on the changing mat. Fern expected the diaper to be taped up then, but Aurelia instead squirted baby oil into her hand, rubbing it across her palms and then massaging it into Fern’s thighs. Expecting this to go the same way as the cleaning, Fern relaxed, until she felt the slick touch of Aurelia’s fingers run over her clit. She gasped, eyes widening, looking up at Aurelia with craving. She didn’t understand why the pain and discomforts had turned her on so thoroughly, but the agonizing spanking and cramp-inducing enemas had left her quivering for this woman’s touch. Aurelia matched her gaze, smirking with her eyes, basking in the power she held. Parting her lips, she instructed quietly, “Beg.” “Please,” Fern began, the words tumbling out of her mouth as Aurelia stroked her clit faster, slender fingers tracing circles around her. Needing the satisfaction, she babbled, “Let me–make me–I want to–” Aurelia slowed down, letting the excitement fade, disapproval hiding behind her eyes. Sinking deeper into submission, Fern realized what she had to say. “I want to be good,” she promised, and the words felt true as she said them. “I want you to teach me my lesson, I want to be put in my place–thank you for punishing me, and please don’t let me forget–aah, ah–” She gasped, words stolen from her throat as a delicate finger plunged inside her, feeling Fern from the inside while her clit burned with sensation. Fern couldn’t think any longer, she could only succumb to the passions that welled up within her, moaning in bliss as she squirted once again, pushed into the most intense orgasm of her life. Collapsing against the changing mat, Fern panted for air, body tingling with sweat and euphoria. Aurelia, smiling, reached for the baby powder, continuing as though this had all been a routine part of her diaper change. Fern’s diaper was already damp when Aurelia pressed it against her, holding it snug and arranging the tapes. It smelled of sex, and the slight damp squish against her pussy told her new things about herself. She didn’t want this to be her last orgasm in diapers. Reaching up and cradling Fern’s face in her hand, Aurelia whispered, “You did well.” Nodding, delirious, Fern asked, “Is that it?” “Oh, you sweet, darling little thing.” Aurelia smiled, both predatory and caring. “Absolutely not.” Taking Fern’s hand, she pulled the girl into a sitting position. Fern stared up at her, feeling the difference in their stature as Aurelia towered above her. “Follow me.” Aurelia turned on her heels, walking towards the door to the hallway. Fern began to stand, but she shot a look over her shoulder and shook her head. “Hands and knees.” Not questioning, not complaining, Fern crawled after her, shuffling on the hardwood floor. The motion emphasized her diaper, causing her padded bottom to wave in the air as she moved, telling her that she belonged like this. It was a humiliating display, parading her utter lack of dignity in contrast to Aurelia’s refined maturity, and as a blush burned on her face, Fern tried to push her bottom in the air higher, to sashay a little more, to show how much she had earned her position here. Helpless and wonderfully defeated, she crawled after her matron as they went out into the hallway and down to the left, towards…Fern’s room. “You may have noticed the mounting points on your bed,” Aurelia explained, leading the girl to her room. “I had no specific intent to do this until I caught you sneaking about, but it seems appropriate, now.” Pushing open the door, she revealed Fern’s bed–Fern’s crib. Her bed had been affixed with tall wooden bars that fenced it in, turning the place she slept into a juvenile cage. One side was open, swung out like a door, and Aurelia pointed. Obedient, Fern crawled in, laying down on her mattress. The blankets reminded her how tired she was, how much she’d gone through. When Aurelia swung the crib’s side panel shut and latched it–locked it, with an obvious, chunky padlock–Fern didn’t mind. She curled up, diaper rustling between her hips. “Rest,” Aurelia instructed, and Fern needed no further prompting before drifting off to sleep. She dozed comfortably–maybe for thirty minutes, maybe for a few hours. When she awoke, it was to the sound of giggling girls, echoing from somewhere else in the house. Aurelia’s nieces were home. Fern sat up sharply. There was a distinct pressure on her bladder, reminding her of the water she’d drank, of the fact that she hadn’t peed since before all this began, even when she released her enemas. Now the locked bars of her crib were a problem, and she reached up, shaking them. “Aurelia?” she called out. To her surprise, the door opened almost immediately, and the tall, powerful woman entered, looking down on Fern. “Yes, sweet thing?” she inquired, moving to the side of the crib. “Do you need something?” “I need to pee,” Fern explained. After her nap, little things like ‘deep humiliation’ felt more important to her. Still, she felt the need to add, “Please, ma’am.” “You saved yourself there,” Aurelia commented. “And, of course, you’re welcome to go.” Fern started to smile, before noticing that Aurelia hadn’t unlocked the crib. “Um…” “What?” Aurelia asked, tilting her head with mock innocence. “Go ahead, use your diaper.” Flushing, Fern shook her head. “I…I can hold it.” “Alright then.” Moving to unlock the crib, Aurelia added, “You will come downstairs and apologize to the girls now.” “What?” Fern squeaked, eyes widening. Aurelia froze, staring harshly at her. With quiet intensity, she said, “I am going to assume you were asking me to repeat myself because you didn’t hear, and that you haven’t chosen this moment to begin sassing me. You will come downstairs and apologize to the girls now.” Burning bright red, looking down at her naked, diapered body, Fern stammered, “Bu–I–” Watching her, Aurelia waited to see what words Fern could concoct. She took a breath, rephrasing her objection. “I don’t know what to say to them.” “You will apologize for spying on their private time,” Aurelia explained. “And promise you will not try to invade their personal lives again. This is not optional, Fern, you violated their trust far more than my own.” Nodding, feeling genuine shame, Fern asked, “May I please dress myself first?” Agreeing to that with a nod, Aurelia unlocked the crib, but said, “Wait here.” She left, returning only a moment later with Fern’s scrubs. Not her underwear–just the shirt and pants. She passed them to Fern, who dressed herself as quickly as she could. It was a paltry uniform. Her nipples brushed against the fabric of the top, the bumps just barely visible if you looked hard enough, and the stretchy pants bulged obviously around the diaper. She would just have to hope it would be discreet enough to get her through the apology. Standing, she watched Aurelia nervously. “Is it obvious?” Aurelia actually laughed, her voice rich and golden, as though she’d been told the funniest thing in the world. “Start moving–and you may walk, if you’d like.” Bright red, Fern walked to the door, acutely aware of every crinkle, every whiff of baby powder, every waddling step. Her anxiety only had time to build as she walked downstairs, wishing her bladder wasn’t full to bursting, making her squirm and whimper as she got to the living room and entrance hall of the home. (Maybe they won’t notice,) she thought as she stopped at the base of the stairs, getting the attention of the two girls. Shifting her weight from foot to foot to resist the ache in her bladder, Fern faced them. They looked back at her, curious as to why she’d come down. Leah spoke up first. “Hiya, Fern–are you okay?” “I…” Fern began, aware of Aurelia at the top of the landing behind her, watching this whole thing. She felt the need to pee burn inside her, and the slight damp in her diaper only made things worse–it felt as though she’d been holding it for ages and was now sitting on a toilet. Her body wanted to go, it felt natural to go, and she could barely convince it to resist. “Carolyn, Leah, I need to…apologize…” Confused, they approached from across the living room. Carolyn frowned. “For what?” “Erm…” Blushing, praying that her potty dance wasn’t as visible as it felt, Fern said, “Two nights ago, I…well, I was home, and you didn’t know, and I overheard something.” Raising an eyebrow, Leah tilted her head to one side. “What do you mean?” “Well–you were with your aunt.” (God, I just need to say it.) Burning with shame, she tried to get the apology over with. “And…well I heard you with her.” “I don’t understand,” Leah insisted, “Can you be more specific?” (How much more specific do you want me to be?) “I heard you both…and, well…” She didn’t notice Aurelia behind her until the woman was only a step away–she’d been totally silent coming down the stairs, but now, as she stepped up to Fern, Aurelia made herself known. Reaching down casually, she pulled down the waistband of Fern’s scrub pants, revealing her puffy diaper and giving the seat a squeeze. “Good job, Fern!” Aurelia praised. “Your diaper’s still dry!” Fern went numb, eyes widening in humiliation as both girls burst into fits of giggles. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t speak, she could only stand there as they laughed, and as Aurelia reached her hand to the front, pressing her fingers into the crotch of the diaper, testing– “Oh, I spoke too soon,” Aurelia corrected. “That’s alright, that’s why you’re wearing it.” Shocked, Fern realized that she’d lost control–her bladder had stopped resisting, and she now flooded the diaper in front of the giggling girls, with Aurelia’s hand there to feel the rush of pee that saturated her padding. Blush deepening, Fern also realized how much the woman’s touch turned her on, even now. As the stream trickled to an end and the girls managed to stifle their laughter, Carolyn pushed the other girl’s shoulder in a playful way. “You’re mean, Leah!” she taunted, adding in a mock imitation, “‘Can you be more specific?’” “I–” Fern began. “You–you knew?” “Of course,” Leah snickered. “Mommy told us once she realized you’d been spying. She says you took your punishment really well, too!” Dazed, Fern almost stumbled, but Aurelia’s arms kept her upright. They’d known all along, she’d never had a chance of hiding, and yet… “Girls,” Aurelia interrupted. “Do you want to help Mommy change Fern’s diaper?” Both of them nodded, both dutiful and excited, and each took one of Fern’s hands, spinning her and pulling her right back up the stairs. One question broke through the noise of confusion in Fern’s mind. “‘Mommy’?” she asked, baffled, stumbling to keep up. Every step squelched her freshly soggy diaper against her, building her arousal a little more. “Isn’t she your aunt?” Smirking, the girls shared a look. Leah offered the explanation. “That’s just what we tell boring people. You didn’t think we were actually related, did you?” “She’s our Mommy, we’re her Little Girls, none of us are legally family,” Carolyn added, filling in the practical details. “We promise to follow her rules, and she takes care of us!” Dazed, Fern waddled after the girls, and soon found herself back on the changing pad, both of them fussing over her. “It’s her first diaper change,” Leah pointed out excitedly, peeling the tapes away. “Don’t be selfish, make sure she’s all clean,” Carolyn replied, pulling two wipes from the box. “It’s about her, not just us.” “I know, but–it’s so special!” Fern didn’t know if her blush could get more intense. Neither girl commanded any authority, they lacked the dominant power of their Mommy, but that didn’t make it any better–it just made Fern feel like their doll, a plaything to be cooed over. Carolyn used wipes while Leah got the baby oil out, though she only gave Fern one mischievous teasing touch before rubbing it in properly. “So?” she asked. “What did you tell Mommy?” Fern frowned. “What did I tell her about what?” Both girls stopped, looking at her. Carolyn spoke first. “Well…are you going to be our new baby sister?” It took Fern’s brain a few seconds to catch up, to understand what was being implied by that. To have what the girls had–all the time, not just for this one punishment. To feel this again. To be a part of what they had. Aurelia stepped into the bedroom, smiling down at her. “You took your punishment very well,” she explained. “If you don’t want to continue, you can put your grown up panties back on, I’ll let you stay until you can find a new apartment. I’ll be sad to see you go, but it’s your decision.” Eyes huge, Fern asked, “But if I do?” “Then, you can be mine. We’ll forgive you for your naughtiness–at least, if you think you’ve earned that forgiveness.” All three women watched Fern, who lay on the floor on top of a half-soaked diaper, naked, bottom bruised, exhilarated. “I…” she began, reeling with the options. Kneeling beside her, Aurelia rested a hand on her arm. “It’s your choice, Fern.” “I want…” Fern continued, shuddering with the thought. “May I please finish my punishment?” Aurelia’s smile broadened. “And what would you like the rest of your punishment to be, baby girl?” Cheeks burning on her face and her bottom, Fern looked down at her naked body, too ashamed to say it. “It’s okay,” Leah promised, squeezing one of her hands. “We ask Mommy for more punishment too–you don’t have to be embarrassed.” “She asks for more punishment,” Carolyn corrected, but her expression softened and she took Fern’s other hand, so that both girls were holding her. “But we know what it’s like.” “Then…” Fern began, humiliation and arousal fighting for dominance in her mind. “I’d like another spanking please, Mommy. Can you use one of the toys in your closet this time?” Standing, Aurelia walked to the bed and sat, making her lap open. “Yes you may. Bring her over here, please, girls–and then you both pick out your favorite toy, so your new baby sister can feel them.” With glee, the girls lifted Fern to her feet, practically carrying her to Aurelia. Fern found herself pushed over her lap, and felt a hand rest on her already-beaten ass while the girls went off to fetch spanking tools. “Are you ready?” Aurelia asked, softly, almost a whisper. Fern swallowed, taking stock of herself. Naked, exposed, and more excited than she’d ever been in her life. Looking over her shoulder, up at the woman who’d come to dominate her, she nodded. “Yes, Mommy, I am.” The End ... That's this story wrapped up - I had a ton of fun writing it, and I hope you enjoyed reading it! If you want to support stories like these, consider donating a couple dollars a month on Ream or SubscribeStar - you get early access, and I get grocery money which allows me to write! 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Here is the first chapter of my brand new LittleMonstrumVerse ABDL story - Arbitrio Sanguinis! My 11th novel so far, and 3rd novel in the 'LittleMonstrumVerse' series I've been writing. Set after the Infernum Infantem Christmas Special, we see my monster universe through another pair of eyes... ones looking for a special someone. Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them. They really help with the motivation to write more! Don't forget you get get 2 week early access (so 4 chapters) to my main ongoing story, if you subscribe to my Subscribestar. Also, please link to my stories rather than posting them as files when sharing with others! Chapter 1: Ennui Arbitrio Sanguinis – LittleFallenPrincess “Luce…?” “Lucy…” “Miss Piddlepants…” “Baby bloodsucker…” “Mushtush…” I could hear them all trying to get my attention, trying to tease me into responding… but I found it hard to break my eye contact with the floor. I was currently winning my staring contest with it, and I wasn’t going to let myself lose now, not this late into the game. Because I play to win… and totally not to avoid looking at all my happy friends with all their happy families and partners… totally not to avoid thinking about how everyone has someone but me… totally not to see all my friends sitting on their Mummy’s or Daddy’s laps… feeling happy… little… loved… Nope. Because that would make me a grumpy sourpuss. And I didn’t want to bring down the mood of the event by telling anyone what was really going on in my head. I had been hiding it for the longest time now and no matter what… I wasn’t going to bother any of them with it. Especially not since that whole awkward Christmas party that Nia had to deal with. I wasn’t going to add to her plate right now, she was still in her blissful post-engagement period where she and Vic couldn’t stop bragging about the proposal or the ring that Nia wore on her finger. Her stupid adorable finger. Totally not salty that everyone I knew was either married, getting married, or getting serious with a partner or partner. Totally not salty at the fact I hadn’t dated anyone in a long time, not since my shitty abusive ex. And no, I’m not counting those few I found online that I stupidly got my hopes up about… only to be disappointed and alone. Totally not salty. Because I can’t be. I can’t ruin this for them. Or bother them with it. I’m already a bother. They’re already so accepting of me, and so nice to me… I don’t want to ever bother them more than I already do. So for now, I’ll continue staring at the floor, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone, making it look like I’m in my own little world, unable to hear them. They’ll stop eventually, then I’ll apologise like I always do, and then they can move on and I can go on… avoiding looking at my best friends in the world because they’re happy and I’m just… un… un… …Unloveable. Thankfully, as predicted, they moved on with their conversation and let me be, discussing a camping trip they were planning for later this year, sometime in late summer. No doubt I’d be invited, but honestly… I wasn’t sure I even wanted to go. Not on my own anyway. It’ll just be the same as these events, they all get super romantic and couple-y… and I’m left on my own… with no dance partner to dance with. That’s all I want in life. Or in my case, un-life. In my long un-life as a vampire, I’ve dated, I’ve found partners… but none of them lasted. At first I tried to protect my humanity, focusing on dating only humans. But the ones who know about our supernatural world aren’t all amazing allies, the few I did try dating early on in my vampiric life… were only out to get turned. They had been familiars of other vampires, and since vampires like to promise to turn them but end up never doing it… they seek outside sources. So of course they all used me to get turned… At least I realised after the first one that I was being played, so that quickly stopped and I moved away from dating humans altogether. Instead I focused on our own community. But this was at the start of the last century… so it was a bit more difficult to find someone. Much smaller dating pools. I tried dating a couple of vanillas… but they freaked out and ran when I started being myself, my more… infantile self… At the time, I wasn’t even aware of this kink I have, or my little side, I just tried dating someone who was a bit more serious than me, and looking back now… yeah, they were vanilla. So I gave up dating monstrum too, well… vanilla ones (though again, didn’t realise until later that they were known as ‘vanilla’, I just didn’t want to date anyone overly serious who couldn’t stand my childishness). Which limited my dating pool even further, as it was shortly after this that I met my ex, the one I ran into again last year. That was a thing, she introduced me to this kink and the world of kink, that’s it. End of story. Nothing else to say. So I gave up dating again, even kinksters this time. For decades I had nothing… no one… at least no one who didn’t abuse me but let’s not talk about those two relationships just yet… then I met Beth. I thought I felt a spark between us… but that ended up just being a best friendship. I’m not complaining, I love Beth to bits, as I do all my friends… but I still wanted that bit extra. It hurt even more when I set her and her wife up together, before Susie had died and got resurrected as a zombie, but I knew they’d be a perfect match. I mean me and Bea had a very very brief thing, but we very quickly realised we weren’t really that into each other and were happier as friends. So around that period of my life I just stopped dating, focusing entirely on making friends… but that didn’t really get me anywhere either. I had Beth and Bea and that was about it. Eventually I’d meet Susie when I went to University, but I still didn’t date anyone. Then Grim and Abby came into my life and I moved in with them. And for the longest time, I’ve kept my sadness hidden inside me, trying to appear as strong as possible to all my friends, so as to not bring them down into my depression and my loneliness bubble. At this point I was sure I’d never find anyone. Nia and Victoria had this amazing backstory about them meeting and getting together. Demons, summonings, cults… I mean Vic even died for Nia, and Nia went to Hell for her… and that’s not even getting into her whole ‘being a fallen angel’ thing. Which I still can’t get over. Freakin’ angels! Susie and Beth too. Susie found out about Beth being a Witch, died, got resurrected, and then got hunted by Death. So Beth created this Sanctuary, a place where monstrum from all over can come for… well… Sanctuary. They can come here to hide out from hunters, they can come here after escaping abusive partners or after humans have found out about them. Or… they can just come for help regarding anything. And Susie and Beth will help them, no questions asked. Like… these two are made for each other, and I love it… but it also breaks my heart that I don’t have an awesome partner with an awesome backstory. Even Abby has her partners, who had both turned up for today’s littles event, both fussing over the very blushy little kitsune. They really treated the girl like their daughter, fussing over her and spoiling her and making sure she’s never wanting for anything. And from how I’ve heard Abby talk about them… she isn’t just using them for her money. Not that she’s that kind of person anyway, but she genuinely loves these two. So whilst she doesn’t have an awesome backstory full of death and sacrifice and love… she has TWO people loving her with all their heart. Why does she get two… when I get… no one. Even Grim is here with his Daddy, for the first time. Turns out his Daddy is very new to all this, and was very nervous about coming to an event, but Grimfang managed to convince his fellow werewolf boyfriend to attend today. They have this adorable story about how they met, sounding like they had met in a freaking romantic comedy. Like… Come on! Where’s my romantic comedy? Where’s my caregiver? Where’s my tale of defying Death for love? No… Instead I was stuck here, in this meaningless existence, slowly dwindling away day by day. It was a struggle to even eat, often my housemates would need to bring me… ‘sustenance’… from our ethical supplier, and pressure me to drink it. Because most days consisted of me getting out of bed (no, I know I’m a vampire, but only old school vamps sleep in coffins), going on my PC, playing games… then going to bed when the sun comes up again. I barely left my room, going back into my old ways, back to before I started opening up. Then Nia came into my life and gave me a little hope that maybe I’d find someone… so I put myself out there… only to be massively disappointed. Then her engagement happened and I got another boost in morale… but so far it isn’t going well. There just aren’t that many single Mummies out there, especially not monstrum ones. So I’ll just continue being alone. Feeling this hopelessness but keeping it bottled up insi… “Luce…” Nia said, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of my seat. Before I could respond, complain… or even react, she pulled me away from our little group in the corner, past some littles that were playing in the ballpit, past Medusa, who was colouring in a picture for her Mummy, and towards the plastic adult-sized playhouse in the far corner. She poked her head in, whilst still holding my hand, to check if it was clear, before turning around and smiling at me. “All clear! Come on, grumpy pants…” She said, pulling me into the playhouse and closing the big red plastic door. “Sit. Now!” I did as she said, and sat in the corner on my thickly padded butt, my red babydoll dress lifting slightly as I took my place, revealing the thick nappy between my very pale legs. Quickly fixing my dress, I adjusted myself so I was comfortable on the squishy play mat underneath me. “So… spill it.” Nia said, sitting opposite me and looking at me intensely. “Spill what? I can’t spill anything, I’ve got a baba…” I joked, trying to move away from the real reason we were in this playhouse right now. “Oi, I’m the one who makes snarky jokes. Stay in your lane, little vampling.” Nia grinned at me. “No, seriously, what’s up hun?” “What do you mean? Everything is fine!” I replied, putting on the best fake smile I could for my friend. “I know I’m still relatively new to emotions and people and everything… but I’m pretty sure I can spot when my best friend is down in the dumps about something. So spill it!” “I’m fine, I promise!” I lied again. “We’re not leaving this playhouse until you tell me what’s going on in that silly little mind of yours…” “Nothing… I…” “Sweetie… don’t you just want to… tell me… everything…?” Nia said, crawling over slowly, her padded hips swaying back and forth as her tail swished about, before she got to me. Lifting her hand, she placed it under my chin and lifted, so my eyes couldn’t break contact with hers. “Come on…” I could feel something stirring within me, as if I wanted to… no, as if I needed to do whatever she said… That’s when it clicked. “OI! NO USING SUCCUBUS POWERS!” I yelled at her, maybe a little too loudly. She instantly threw off this sultry persona and sat back on her padded butt, pouting with her arms crossed in front of me. “Fine! But you have to tell me. It’s in the best friend's rules.” “I… fine. I… I’m just… I’m lonely.” “But we’re all here, having fun! All your friends!” She argued. “Not that way… I’m very thankful for you all… but seeing you…” “Oh.” Nia’s face dropped and she quickly hid her engagement ring with her other hand. “Seeing us all with our caregivers… with partners… Oh hun, I’m sorry…” “Yeah… got it in one.” I sighed. “Sweetie, it’s just a matter of time. You’ll find someone. And I bet they’re gonna be the bestest Mummy ever, making you happier than ever.” “I thought that with my ex…” “Yes, and that was a lesson that will allow you to sense people who are wrong for you from now on. Trust me, your time is soon. Just… keep a little bit of hope, please?” “I… can’t promise…” “Where are you looking these days? I thought you were putting yourself out there again? What about that human you were dating when I first met you?” “Didn’t work out, she ghosted me. And I tried a website for monstrum. That didn’t work out either. People were vampire chasers. Or… the other kind of chaser…” I said, rolling my eyes in disgust. “Oh? OH… eww…” Nia said as she finally understood just what I meant. “Fuck them. That doesn’t bother me. You’re just this really fuckin cool chick who is also my best fuckin friend.” “You do realise that…?” “That Vic would tan my hide if she heard me using this language? Why do you think we’re hiding out in the playhouse? And even if she didn’t… Beatrice would…” “That I would pay to see…” I grinned. “OI! Don’t you start! You don’t know what it’s like to be spanked by that witch!” “No, because I’m a good girl.” My grin grew twice as big. “So am I!” Nia whined. “...Most of the time.” I giggled at my friend, who just pouted back at me again. “Why… Why don’t you try dating humans again? Or maybe ask Beth if there are any other dating websites for us lot?” “I tried dating humans. It’s… not good.” “And humans have changed a lot in the billion years since you got turned into a vampire…” “I’m not that old! You’re way older than me, Miss ‘I’m actually an angel from the dawn of time’.” “Yeah but… for someone so old, I look hot.” She said, posing in a seductive way as a joke. “Agreed.” I said, sticking my tongue out at her and smiling. “Why don’t you try it? For me? Please? I hate to see you so lonely.” “Sorry…” “No! No more apologising! This isn’t your fault, silly girl. Just find a dating website, make a profile, put yourself out there. No, in fact… ten dating websites. We’re gonna find you a Mama, no matter what it takes! Why not try finding a vanilla person and introducing them to this?” I loved Nia’s optimism. It… was actually infectious. I could feel that drive to put myself out there again… and it scared me. But a small part of me was excited that maybe… just maybe… …I’d find someone. ======================================================= So... new story! New perspective! More evil cliffhangers await! I hope you enjoyed this, and continue to enjoy it as the story progresses. I put a lot of emotion into this story, as you can probably tell, and a lot more of myself into some of the characters. But don't worry, there will be a lot of fun too! -------------------------------------------- Thinking of finally opening up short story commissions now too finally, now that my writers block seems to have subsided. If you haven't seen, I'm now up and running on Subscribestar! (Sorry for the reminder again, trying to get my subscribers back after the Patreon rubbish!) ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my subscribers for their support over the past few years! Seriously, your support means the world to me. New chapters of my latest story every Wednesday/Sunday! Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post! Thanks!

You've answered your own question: Burning “good” in the pursuit of “better” is a risky strategy 🤣 In my more cynical moments (and my baseline level of cynicism is fairly high to being with) I suspect that the secret to a successful marriage is low expectations. Whilst I myself know for a fact that I am a tungsten monument to perfection 🤣, I accept that my befuddled beloved may misconstrue her bedazzlement at my wonder as flaws on my part and yet she (largely) overlooks them. For my part, I’ve learned to accept that there are aspects to her that will simply never, ever improve. For example, irrespective of lecture, learnings or lived experience, she has zero mechanical sympathy for any device that she uses and consequentially is continually breaking stuff (cue the standard disclaimers: “It just fell off”, “It was like that when I found it” and “Why does everything bad that happens have to be my fault?”) We put up with each other’s imperfections and look at the relationship in terms of its overall balance sheet. If we’d expected an uninterrupted “hearts and flowers” frolic through a field of perpetual nirvana-like state of bliss the union would have carked it on the first rubbish bin night. The nappies are a huge number in the "debit" column however. She’ll trash a washing machine and a mattress every year and nymphomania sounds like a lot of work to me 🤣 Well it's a bit better if you're not the only idiot on the special bus to crazy town 🤣 I'm trying very hard not to regret it but my beloved has other ideas.

Hey everyone! Yay! We’re now over halfway through this story. There’s a lot more to tell and while some of it will just be going over some of the events I already mentioned in my previous story, I promise there’s going to be lots of twists and turns in store. Went to a Littles party yesterday actually and while that was pretty fun, there was just no way I could edit another chapter in time to be put out before my busy day today. Tomorrow is another busy day unfortunately, and while I will try all that I can to get another chapter out, I might not be able to post again until Monday. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 9: A Healing Fieldtrip Memory can be a fickle thing in one’s life, especially if one suddenly found themselves in the midst of a post-regression and post-locked-in state like I had. On one hand, I was remembering so many things, but I also found that with every pro I found, a con was sure to follow. Remembering that I’m Emma, and it wasn’t just a term to refer to me as, such as ‘girl,’ ‘Little,’ or any other name, was a positive. Feeling like I was called something else at one point and still not remembering it though, not so much. Remembering all the good times with my friends and Nancy felt so wonderful. Remembering how far I had fallen or the new maternal bond that Nancy now insisted we share however, likewise came with a lot of negatives as well. While her temper had improved tremendously, I felt a fear regarding Nancy’s new personality. At first, I thought she would be thrilled as I began to progress in my maturity, but each time I did, I felt a little cloud of maternal yet potent anger hover over her. Even if it was something as simple as crawling across my nursery’s floor one day, I felt like I was in the wrong. In no time at all, I found myself afraid that at any moment, she would snap and try to get me back to where I was as practically a newborn… by any means necessary. Still, while I was at daycare, which soon almost oddly became my sanctuary away from most of my drama back home, I was reunited with both my magical stuffy and my friends. And, if that wasn’t enough, I was progressing much faster here than anyone else had anticipated. I was still in the Burrows room and probably would be for another three months at this rate, but I could tell that I was quickly being retrained in order to go back to the Meadows room one day. While before it felt like a prison, now however, I felt it was a lofty goal for me to strive towards. “Come on, Emma!” Miss Tully cheered from the end of my crib in the Burrows room. “Crawl just a little more for me. Come on, sweetie!” Her encouragement flowed through me, but I felt something else surging in my body lately. It always seemed to be around my magical stuffy, so I figured it was just him working his little powers on me again. I wanted to question it all a little more, but not wanting to deny my little extra help, I had just accepted his seeming magic more and more, regardless of if I wanted to or not. At first, that lack of control sometimes scared me, but I quickly realized it was pushing me the exact amount I needed to be to get to the next step. So, for today as an example, on what was probably the fifth time I was struggling to make it across the crib, I just wanted to stop. Miss Tully freely encouraged me with all her might, but I was dead tired. I could use a nap for sure, and if post-lunch patterns were anything to be believed, a diaper change as well. Still, I tried to move on with all my might, but it didn’t seem to be enough anymore today. Right then though, I heard something float through my head like it had happened on the first day I reawakened. ‘Come on, Emma… come on… just a few crawls more…’ It was strange and almost ethereal with how little it came through, but it was still there. Moreover, I suddenly felt a willfulness in my limbs that almost seemed beyond me. Now, relearning everything that I had once known, that sensation was just kind of strangely common these days, but today, each of my near useless legs began to shuffle back towards Miss Tully. Thinking it was likely just me, Miss Tully cheered me on. “Thatta girl, Emma! Come on! Come to me. That’s it, baby!” Her encouragement felt babyish, but undoubtedly nice. Halfway through, I almost gave up again as my body began to falter for a second time, but once again, another voice floated through my head. ‘Come on, Emma… you can make it!’ It was the last push I needed to get through the final stretch. With almost a burst of energy, my limbs sped, or at least sped up, all the way to the other side of the crib. Miss Tully immediately beamed down at me and gave me a huge smile. “There you go, Emma!” She then picked me up and started bouncing me around. Considering my previous confinement to my crib, these new sensations that I was just freshly remembering again were nearly pure bliss. It was almost unbelievable to go from being essentially just a lump in a crib to being praised for crawling across the very same object. And things like that just started happening more and more to me. It was a grueling process, but not long after, despite a few setbacks every time I left the daycare and nursed from Nancy still, I had already gained the ability to walk when I could at least hold onto something or someone. Fortunately for me, it was just in time to go to on the field trip to the zoo. Nancy had protested that I wasn’t ready yet, but surprisingly, several of the staff members stood up for me, even going as far as to say that ‘it would help my overall progress.’ Nancy didn’t like that at all, but she begrudgingly accepted, which is why I now found myself being pushed in a stroller by Miss Tully. Despite being able to walk long distances now, like would be required at a zoo, something like a stroller was still unfortunately required. To help my self-image and acceptance of it though, I just imagined myself being carted around like I would if I was a queen of some kind. “Lookie, Emma!” Miss Tully shouted out, pointing over to a large bear. “Isn’t he just amazing?” I could only stare back at the bear for a moment in terror. He was at least triple my size and my head could have easily fit inside his tremendous mouth. I didn’t even see his claws full length but considering that just one of them seemed like a butcher knife ready to come for me, I just wanted to keep my distance. Likely sensing my apprehension, Miss Tully moved on and found several other animals I was interested in. Now, despite the details of my life still being fuzzy from before Nancy and Mrs. Tatum’s foster home, I very well knew that I was from a different place than here and hadn’t ever encountered some of the even just common animals to this place. What they saw as the average equivalent of a giraffe, to me, may have been a long dead or just a myth. So, it was no mistake that I was more fascinated with something like a woolly mammoth than a pond of flamingos, despite their double size here. It seemed pretty boring honestly, but when it thundered out its cry and shook the building, I was instantly hooked. Miss Tully, being who she was, noticed. “Aww! Do you like the woolly mammoth, sweetie?” Still unable to articulate more than a few syllables, I took some comfort that I could now speak in full sentences. If someone could understand them was another matter though, so in this case and not wanting to put up with the complex translation process, I just enthusiastically nodded. Fortunately for me, Miss Tully had been taking a special interest in me and was doting her personal attention sole on me today. So, having a free moment and seeing an opportunity for me to interact with the great beast, she quickly rolled me over to the line waiting nearby. It was a bit tedious and I kinda got bored at one point and began to fuss a bit, but finally, it was our turn. So, to better enjoy the experience, Miss Tully unbuckled me and held me in her arms. “Look, Emma. The mammoth is trying to say hello.” Right in front of us and to my utter amusement, I saw the mammoth approach us and wave its long trunk around. It let out another blast, and while several other Littles seemed terrified being so close now, I just giggled and reached out to touch it. It was an annoying habit I still retained from being nearly completely regressed to feel out the world around me, but today, it actually paid off. “Does she want to feed the mammoth, ma’am?” the zookeeper asked us from nearby. Miss Tully looked down at me and seeing my opportunity to interact with something so unique, I once again enthusiastically nodded my head. Both Bigs chuckled and Miss Tully nodded her head to continue with the mammoth interaction. “Yes, thank you. That would be very nice for Emma here.” “Emma… what a pretty name… no doubt short for Emily, huh?” the zookeeper said normally, but also with a strange note that somehow, she was more than a zookeeper. Miss Tully didn’t seem to notice, but as a keen outside observer now from my still static and somewhat regressed mentality, I had started to notice a lot of things. Fortunately, now, I could actually remember what had happened when I did see something. ‘If only I could remember the same with Mrs. Gillies and Nurse Bee…’ It felt important to remember whatever I saw individually between the two of them, but for now, the zookeeper only smiled back and handed Miss Tully a small bag of peanuts. “Okay, Emma. Let’s try this together first.” I nodded, and smiling, Miss Tully emptied a few peanuts into her palm and used her other hand to guide mine underneath hers up to the tips of the mammoth’s trunk. To my delight, seconds later, each of the peanuts was plucked out. Not being able to help myself and finding everything so amusing now, I giggled loudly. “I guess someone liked that, huh?” Miss Tully asked as she nuzzled with me for a moment. Not being able to contain myself anymore, and not even caring that one syllable versus another to Miss Tully would just sound the same, I didn’t care. I still wanted to be heard. “Dah!” Smiling and guiding my hand up once more with some peanuts, I just giggled in happiness as this time, my hand was on top. And again, the mammoth used its trunk and plucked each of the peanuts away. To be honest, it kinda tickled. Satisfied over a successful time seeing the mammoth and other animals of that enclosure of the zoo, Miss Tully used my smiles and limited input to next choose the birdhouse to visit. “Hee!” I shouted out next, hoping to go to one place in particular. As we walked there, we would occasionally see another cluster or two of Littles from the daycare, but today was specifically Littles Day, so everything was extremely crowded as we meandered through the various spaces. To my enjoyment, I even saw Anna and Lilly here today. I waved to both, and while I could still see their sadness and hesitancy over my present condition, I could also see a spark of joy as well. Being told that your friend may never regain their maturity must have been a bitter pill to swallow, even in this society, so seeing me slowly getting better I had to imagine was a big relief. Getting to the birdhouse, I marveled at the immaculate steel and glass structure all around us practically sparkling in the sunlight. It very much looked like one of the old birdcages from the outside, letting plenty of light in on the inside. Dozens of species of birds flocked around and above our heads as electronic barriers kept all the birds inside as extra safety precaution. It was one of the crown jewels of the zoo, which also meant that today, it was very crowded inside. Miss Tully wheeled me through the enclosure, and we saw birds from all over the world. To the east were birds from Asia, the north side had those from Europa, and the west and south sides had a mix of species all over elsewhere ranging from Australia to Metzlum. In each exhibit of the birdhouse, Miss Tully and I saw each of the birds in wonderment, but for me, it wasn’t enough. I was still strapped in my stroller, and I had been getting antsy for a while now. It might have been my diaper riding up or just the straps being too tight, but I wanted out. Miss Tully tried to convince me otherwise and get me to calm down, but she knew a losing battle when she saw one. Quickly being unbuckled, I practically sprang to the near invisible wall in front of me, separating the visitors from most of the birds. I felt I could almost just reach out and touch one of them, but my hand soundly colliding with the barrier was about as close as I got. Unfortunately for Miss Tully’s soon-to-be frayed nerves, a whole mass of other daycare Littles had just arrived at the group and were quickly crowding me. Now, I wasn’t exactly a slouch anymore as far as my physical abilities were concerned, but it didn’t take long for me to give way and slowly be edged away. Not being too tall either, she didn’t see me, and being too distracted by the wonderous birds, I didn’t even realize I was slowly getting pushed away from her. I thought I heard some woman yelling as I moved onto the next enclosure, but it didn’t take long for me to get distracted and see a dodo bird standing right in front of me. He was so goofy looking, and I wanted to touch him. I knew it was impossible on one level, but my still regressed instincts remained a powerful force in my body. Getting a little too close though, the dodo bird flapped away. “Bih!” I cried out before following the fascinating creature. Soon, I was in a part of the birdhouse that didn’t seem to be very popular. The birds were more ordinary and could be even found locally in some cases, so most groups avoided the area unless they were trying to be alone on purpose or were here on a school field trip and needed to complete their mandatory scavenger hunt. I just wanted to see the dodo bird up close coming in here, but soon, something else caught my easily distracted eye. I wasn’t sure of what it was at first, but my eyes were quickly drawn to the shiny nature of the object on the ground. I tried to will every ounce of my body away from the red shiny spot in front of me, but with my regressed instincts and still partially uncontrollable body, I dashed to it as fast as I could. In retrospect, I probably looked like a cat jumping over a laser on the ground, and part of me wanted to groan over my perceived immaturity with something as simple as an object being shiny, but my movements just powered forward. “Shi! Shi!” It wasn’t long before it darted just out of my reach, so, now hooked, I chased after it. “Shi! Shi! Doh go! Nu! Co ba hee!” With my waddled stance, I ran as best I could after the ever-moving dot. A few corridors, down some stairs, and even through a pair of doors. I had no idea where I was, but the shiny dot soon stopped in the middle of the room. Determined to catch my prey, I leaped over on top of it. ‘I got you now!’ But when I uncapped my clasped hands, instead of seeing my prize in all its glory, nothing was there. Frustrated, I could feel a few tears begin to mist my eyes. In desperation, I looked around, but the shiny spot was gone, and I realized two things with a growing sense of terror. First, I had no idea where I was, now seeing that the bright lights of the birdcage were completely replaced by concrete walls and dim lighting. Second, I started to hear noises all around me. I tried to scamper to the door I thought I had come through, but in seconds, the room was filled by at least five people. I feared the worst and that I was now about to be kidnapped by Bigs and sold into Little’s slavery, as had become horrifyingly popular again, but as my scared eyes opened a crack when I wasn’t immediately seized, I saw they were almost all my size. “Easy, easy, sweetie…” the one a little bit out front of the others said as she held her arms up as if she was surrendering to me. “We don’t want to hurt you. We just want to help…” I only could stare back at her, namely her clothing. Tactical gear adorned most of her body and there were some painted shapes on her shoulders I didn’t recognize, but thinking back, they quickly reminded me of what Sarge often looked when Jimmy outfitted him for one of his mock wars in daycare with the other stuffy’s. “Sodoah?” I asked inquisitively. The other members of the group looked at each other questioningly, but the leader came closer to me and stared deeply into my eyes. “I don’t think you’re asking for a soda, and while my friends here think you’re a lost cause, I don’t think you are.” She squinted her eyes back at me as if she was trying to read my mind. It made me a little scared to be honest. “Hmmm… let’s do this. I ask a few questions and you just nod back. So, first, can you understand me?” I wasn’t sure if this was a trick and the guns a few of them carried definitely frightened me, but the leader just seemed to have kind eyes. I wanted to know more about her and who she was, but not seeing the harm in indulging her question, I nodded. Her face quickly lit up. “Perfect. Now, is your name… Emma?” I nodded. “Good. Is your caregiver, mommy, mistress, nanny, babysitter, or foster caretaker named Nancy?” I wasn’t sure about some of those labels, but I recognized a few as belonging to Nancy, so again, I nodded. She grinned back at her friends. “Three affirmations. Is that good enough for you, Martinez?” One of the shorter ones in the back of the group sighed and then rolled their eyes. “Yeah, Bree. It’s enough. Just get it over with so we can get out of here. Netsky is already getting back chatter of a missing Little. This area’s going to be swarming soon.” The leader, Bree, nodded her head and smiled back at me for a moment, before looking extremely serious. “Sorry, Emma. This isn’t personal. We just need you back in play.” I started to question what was happening, but two of the group soon lunged and gripped me tightly by the arms. I felt a sudden warmth in the front of my diaper, but I was far more focused on what my eyes were now seeing as a giant needle headed straight for me. “Way! Way! Nu!” I tried to struggle as much as I could, but I was still no match for any of those now holding onto me. I did everything in my power to resist, but the other member of the group walked right up to me and stuck my exposed upper arm with the shot without an ounce of hesitation. It hurt something awful, and I probably would have screamed out in terror, but the members were well prepared and quickly plugged my mouth with a massive pacifier. Scared out of my mind, I saw as Bree walked closer to me and forced me to look directly at her. Oddly though, her gesture was soft and tender… not angry or brutal as I might expect in these situations. I was so confused what was happening. Bree then sighed. “I’m very sorry. I know that probably hurt a lot, but since I know you can understand me, I’ll just start talking while it takes effect. As you heard, we don’t have much time left together.” She closed her eyes for a moment and then pulled out a photo of Nancy and showed it to me. “This is Nancy, right?” I quickly nodded, but I also started to feel a funny feeling up in my head. Oddly enough, it almost felt… more awake, but the feeling was intermittent, and I really couldn’t tell if there was a pattern to it or not. Bree sighed again and pocketed the photo. “We normally don’t intervene in your types of situations. We wish we could, but we would never accomplish any of our other goals with everyone needing help. Helcats can focus on that portion of Littles.” She then paused and gestured to her friends. “See, we extract or awaken Littles like you to gather information or force actions into play that are beneficial to us in the long run. For you, we need to see what Nancy does with how you are… or at least will be. We believe she is connected with a dangerous figure high up in the pro-big movement.” I tired to rack my brain about who it could be, but I was still coming up blank, even as they removed my pacifier. “Soeee… No can hewp you…” I wanted to say more, but I then realized I actually could say more. The others in the group giggled over my reaction as my arms were set free. Bree smiled back. “Yeah. That’s the drugs working alright. Say you hit your head or something like that when you’re asked later about your ‘miraculous’ recovery, and they should just accept it. It’s the sad positive and negative with them using new experimental super drugs on us Littles. Outcomes can always vary.” My mind wheeled about with what had all just happened, and while my body still felt very much the same, portions of my brain I thought were long dormant, almost seemed to start waking up. My memory sadly was still massively full of holes, but it was a huge relief to feel more or less like… well, me. Still, even with all my relief, I still had one pressing question. “Who aww you?” Bree smiled and helped me back to my feet fully. “I’m Bree, or Briana, but we’re Omega Force. Part of the pro-Littles movement. We want to help bring about…” But right before she could say another word, a loud beeping noise could be heard. “Boss!” the one they had referred to Netsky called out. “Incoming! Suggest extraction in t-minus two!” Bree quickly looked panicked. “Shoot! Faster than I thought.” She looked back to arm and sighed. “At least we got you pumped up, but now, follow us and we’ll get you topside without getting you into trouble.” I was still so confused, but not really seeing an alternative and feeling they knew a lot more than they were letting on, I readily followed them out, and sure enough, I was soon bathed in the relatively still abandoned upper halls of the birdhouse. “Dank you…” I said back. Bree smiled. “You’re very welcome, Emma. Just stay safe but go. Rejoin Miss Tully.” We both waved goodbye at each other, and I went to find Miss Tully once their team was fully out of sight. It didn’t take long before I saw the panic my absence had caused. Security guards were scrambling all over the place and Mrs. Gillies had even arrived on the scene and seemed to really be yelling at Miss Tully. I instantly felt guilty over having wandered off before, but part of me felt everything was justified on my end at least as my brain had never felt better. So, knowing I just had to get this out of the way, I ran over to Miss Tully and Mrs. Gillies. “Miss Tuwwy! “Missus Giwees! I wigh’ hewe!” I shouted out to a clearly panicked duo near some security guards. I expected they would have been positively thrilled to see me again and seeming much better now, but instead, I just saw dozens of confused looks stare right back at me. The questions that followed seemed never-ending and being a loyal person to the Littles apart of Omega Force that had saved me, I didn’t reveal what really happened. Instead, I just made up some bogus story about falling and bumping my head a bit, just as they had suggested, as I tried to chase the dodo bird. Their hope for a simple explanation was my strength and I was just glad that in my new mental state, I could actually use it. So, satisfied at least for now, everyone got on the bus and left the zoo. Once we were safely back at daycare, though, I could see the worried expressions from the staff and even a few of my fellow Littles. Littles simply did not just poof and get better. Fortunately, My Tully and Miss Valerie seemed on my side. “Maybe it had to do with how she was regressed?” Miss Valerie offered up as an explanation. “What do you mean by that?” Mrs. Gillies questioned suspiciously. Miss Valerie almost responded, but Miss Tully stopped her first. “It’s okay, Val. I’ve got this. I need to speak my mind anyway.” After a nod from Miss Valerie, Miss Tully turned to Mrs. Gillies. “We all respect your hiring decisions, ma’am, but’ it’s just that… well, we don’t really know what goes into Nurse Bee’s formulas that she uses.” “Shhh!” Miss Mindy shushed her coworker. “We don’t want everyone hearing about what really goes on here. We’re ‘Little friendly’ but we’re not ‘pro-Little.’ You want to get sued into the ground?” Miss Tully nodded. “Right. Sorry, but honestly though… we really don’t know anything about what she uses. That’s a problem in and of itself, but maybe there’s a half-life to it or something in certain doses or even whatever formula she used.” Miss Tully then looked around the gathered group and frowned. “Where is the good nurse anyway?” Mrs. Gillies sighed. “She’s on leave. Some personal matter. You know my policy not to pry into certain things outside of these daycare walls. She’ll be back tomorrow anyways… I suggest we ask her some questions then, okay?” The rest of the staff hesitated but then ultimately nodded at the notion. Somehow, I doubted that if any of them had objected truly that they would have noted so then. Regardless, Nancy soon picked me up and as soon as Miss Tully whispered something in her ear, I could already see the burning flames nearly erupt out of her head. A silent car drive later and I knew that tonight was going to be a rough one with her. So, I should have known better, but I honestly had to tell Nancy about my day at the zoo. Not the shot part, but definitely all the animal’s part. She may have been going down a dark path, but there was still some part of me that wanted her to know everything about my day. So, I started up, not even seeing the issue with doing so. “We wen’ to da zoo taday!” Nancy halted and her face dropped. I wondered if I had said something wrong or if she had finally snapped, but I knew that wasn’t the case when her face turned into a wicked snarl. “You got better… I thought Miss Tully was just trying to get me to crack, but how?” I yelled. “How did you get better?” Her teeth gritted against themselves, and she quickly thumped over to me and grabbed my arm and looked deeply into my eyes. “This morning… this morning… you were all cooing and babbles. Walking but still a baby… now…” If I didn’t know any better, she almost seemed disgusted with how she saw me now. I was so confused and more than a little scared. “I’m losing you, damn it! You were mine… all mine! And now…” her emotions seemed to quickly fluctuate between sorrow and anger. I almost felt bad for her, seeing how she had finally accepted her new role only for me to already be getting better by then. It was a small feeling, and to be honest, each time I came home to find her angry over my new ability, that speck of sympathy just grew smaller. Her face then swung back to anger, and she seemed to get an idea of some kind. “The daycare… it was the daycare, wasn’t it?” I just stood there like a statue, neither wanting to get the daycare or Omega Force into trouble. I was stuck between lies or betrayal no matter what, but a cold, slithering voice soon froze my heart. “And just what did you expect?” a somewhat familiar voice asked rhetorically from the kitchen. “That’s just what and who they are.” To my dreaded surprise, Nurse Bee then exited and glared down at me. “They just want Littles like Emma here to take over this country. Pro-Littles the lot of them! Just you wait.” “So, what do I do?” Nancy questioningly wailed. I could feel the pain behind her words, but these two getting together suddenly started clicking within my head. ‘Maybe Omega force is here because of their relationship… but why? What could be so important about Nurse Bee?’ I was still puzzled over the notional conspiracy theory, but Nurse Bee quickly interrupted my thoughts. “I’ll tell you what we’re going to do,” Nurse Bee said definitively. “We’re going to strike back. They hit us, we hit them. Check all the corners of that place for anti-regression devices. Insist on it. After all, they can’t deny you forever.” Nancy seemed hesitant though. “I don’t know… isn’t that crossing a line though?” Nurse Bee glared back. “Don’t you want your baby Little back. Don’t you want your sweet tiny Emma back in your arms like she only was a week ago?” Nancy seemed to hesitate, but Nurse Bee just doubled down. “Look at her, Nancy. She’s already this mature in such a short period. What is she going to be like in a week? A month? Is she even going to need you anymore?” Nancy’s brain obviously was on overload, but with each passing second, her face only grew angrier. Nurse Bee was getting through to her and I knew it wouldn’t be long before her frustrations were taken out on me. “What do we do?” she asked coldly. Nurse Bee smiled back. “There are several things we can do. I’ll do some checking with stock and get you what you need or what I can get on short notice.” She paused and looked back at me briefly before switching back to Nancy. “So, now do you believe me about the daycare being part of the pro-Littles movement around here?” Nancy seemed to think again for a moment, but then just nodded. “I do. I can’t believe I was so stupid, but yes, I do believe.” I had never seen Nurse Bee so happy in my life. “Perfect.” The two then got a whole lot closer to me and looked in my direction with looks of anger, desire, and power dancing in their eyes. “For tonight though, nurse her. Force her if needed but nurse her. For now, it’s something and can tip the scales in your favor over time if they decide to get dirty in all this.” I wished and hoped like I never had before that Nancy would somehow break off this notion and just take care of me in the ways I still needed. I wanted her to be my caregiver more than anything else by now, but Nurse Bee had knotted her up all good and proper by now. So, without the slightest hesitation, Nancy nodded and grabbed me into her lap. I tried to struggle, but both Bigs just held me firm in her lap. Unfortunately, due to my still-present regressed instincts, as soon as Nancy was adjusted and unhooked her nursing bra, my body essentially went onto autopilot. As my lips wrapped around her engorged and somewhat leaking nipple, I could already feel my body giving in. Worse, it didn’t take long for my sucking reflex to soon kick in as well. I tried to fight, struggle, even bite back, back her milk had done its damage to me already. While incontinence, slower thinking, sleepiness, and a slight buzzing feeling were usual side effects, another was its addictive properties. Within seconds, like an addict returning for their high, I took in the milk with greedy abandonment. Soon, my eyes closed. I wondered about Omega Force, and I worried about my future. Plus, Nurse Bee was here and was clearly a bad influence on Nancy. I was powerless to stop any of it though, and as my belly filled with the milkshake-like milk, despite everything, I could only drift off in peace as the effects fully took ahold of me.

Like thedman, I have a problem with this. As I write, Mike has received only $111 of his monthly $400 request. A contribution on your part would be a thoughtful gesture.

Hey DD!! I hope everyone is having a super wonderful week, time keeps flying by and i'm excited for a relaxing weekend. Today would be my 2nd year 7th month, and 10th day or 953 days of being padded. Ever so closer to my third year! As the time continues ever forward, I find myself writing this after changing out of a very soaked dip having just come home from a fun day at the office for a few in person vendor meetings. This morning though was a bit less fun, having to change from a messy dip at work as quick as possible before the meetings started. While i'm thankful to be a 99% remote employee, it does not spare me from various onsite meetings or projects at offices / data centers but I'd rate myself a professional ninja diaper changer and glad to have private bathrooms when needed. Makes changing much much easier! Life keeps moving forward and my body keeps changing little by little from what I can tell, even if it's subtle, it has added up to a life of constant leakiness and very sudden wetting/messing signals if at all. It's hard to really describe what has changed as things are subjective, but I do feel something internally has taken a hit when i'm leaking in between changes or laying down feeling my bottom growing warmer with no sense of needing to wet at all. Messing still is not at a state where I'd describe a complete loss of control. The warnings signs grow even shorter or more subtle/noticeable. Mentally I feel i've crossed a threshold where I'm feeling more on autopilot and dont give much thought to messing, there isn't a loud alarm or something trying to tell me HEY YOU'RE ABOUT TO POO! more just a very quiet subtle "oh I have to to go, so go." While my body is already relaxed and ready to let go. The warning is subtle, the feeling is becoming more automatic, and while I still feel I could stop it if truly wanted too, I've yet to actually test it. It's more just I have to put little effort into relaxing like I used to way back when i first started. Take this morning for instance, I found myself needing to mess after having just gotten out of the car at work. I found myself letting go and instead of heading to the office, instead heading to change first. I'm unsure what will happen in the future, but if this was as close to "incontinence" I could achieve without surgical intervention, I'm happy. I wish it wasn't an odd request to have scans or something performed, or just ways to see just how different my muscles have adapted / changed / weakened over time without going to a doctor or having something on my medical record. It just would be a neat to see for my own sake just to learn how much has changed without giving subjective writing. Anyway I hope everyone has a wonderful month ahead, and that you all have a great weekend. If you have any questions please let me know as I sometimes just don't know what to write. You're all loved ❤️

Ted woke with a start. The blankets on his bed rustled and his mattress shifted. He had been so deeply asleep, it took him a moment to realize… someone was getting in bed with him. A voice whispered, “Shhh… it’s ok, it’s me.” Ted felt an arm wrap around him and settle him back to his pillow. He finally saw Lara's face faintly through the dark, smiling as she lay in bed next to him. He relaxed, but wondered what she was doing there. Lara’s rubbed Ted’s back, soothing him, then slowly slid her hand down to his hip. “How’s your diaper holding up?” she whispered, tugging on the elastic? Ted scowled and blood rushed to his face. He pouted, still in a bit of a fog wondering if he was dreaming. “Oh don’t be a sour puss!” Lara chided. She slapped him on the thigh. “I actually think they’re really cute. And maybe a little…” Ted’s face softened. He stared at Lara. “… sexy,” she finished softly. Lifting the blankets, she gave Ted a view of her bottom half. He became aroused when he saw she wasn’t wearing pants. But in the dark, he couldn’t make out just what she was wearing. Lara took Ted’s hand and pulled it toward her crotch. His mouth dropped open as he felt a familiar papery crinkle between her legs. His cock swelled within his own diaper. Lara's hand found its way there. She rubbed him through the thin padding making him harder and harder. The tight fitting pull-up constricted his member as it pressed and grew bigger. Lara stared him in the eye as she slid her hand down the waistband and gripped him. Ted gasped. “Oh my… such a big boy…” she cooed. Ted’s eyes rolled back in his head. He moaned as Lara’s cool fingers worked up and down his shaft. “Mmm… that’s it, big boy. That feels good doesn’t it?” “Uhhh huh… don’t… stop…” Lara quickened her pace. Ted’s pull-up crinkled loudly and stretched to the limit. She could tell it wouldn’t take long to get him to a climax. With the boy consumed in his pleasure, she decided to add some baby talk to encourage him to associate his orgasm with being babied. “That’s my big boy… are you gonna make a mess in your diapie? Come on baby, make a sticky mess for me. Don’t worry, I’ll clean you all up and get you in a nice fresh diaper.” Conflicted momentarily by the humiliating way she spoke to him, and the feeling of her hand massaging his cock, Ted gave in to the pleasure. His eyes rolled back in his head and he moaned with delight. “Good boy. You’re gonna make a messy aren’t you? Come on little boy. Cum for me baby. Cum in your little diaper…” Ted did just that. With a loud groan, he exploded into his Goodnite. He writhed on the bed, enjoying every drop. “Good boy…” Lara purred at him. “That’s my good boy.” The padding did its job and soaked up all of Ted’s orgasm. He lay on his bed, eyes closed, in pure bliss. Lara looked him over with a huge smile. “Ok little one,” she finally whispered, “you need a fresh diaper before you fall back asleep.” Ted felt himself blush. He couldn’t bear to open his eyes, again feeling deeply embarrassed by Lara’s tone. Lara tore open the sides of his Goodnite and slid it out from under him. She stood up and tossed the used diaper to the floor. Ted continued pretending he was asleep as Lara grabbed a fresh pull-up from the night stand, stretched it out and slid it up his legs. When she reached his hips, she implored him. “Up please,” she said, surprising herself with a distinctly maternal tone. Ted did as he was told, lifting his bottom off the bed so Lara could get the pull-up in place. He kept his eyes tightly closed, though. “There we go, all clean and dry,” Lara said as she patted his crotch. “Time to go back to sleep, little boy.” Again, she thought she sounded like a mom taking care of a small child. A warmth grew inside her. Lara tucked Ted back in and kissed him on the cheek, eliciting a smile from the boy. “Goodnight, sweetie,” she cooed in his ear. She watched as Ted melted back to sleep, then she quietly left, leaving the bedroom door slightly ajar. She tiptoed back upstairs and passed out with a wide smile spread across her face.

Hi guys! I have kind of a weird question. Does anybody miss when they were little and their Mommy or Daddy could just lift their legs up with one hand and wipe their bottom and then slide a new diaper underneath their bottom during a diaper change and tape it up nice and tight afterwards? I've come to realize that the older I've gotten, the more I miss little things like that. That must be me channeling my inner 11 month old baby. So I'm curious, Does anybody feel the same way?

IN LOCO PARENTIS After Spats reentered the courtroom, Ian slowly counted to thirty before opening the door to the hallway. As he had expected, Judge Reynolds and the District Attorney were having a quiet conversation, with their prospects for reelection, he thought, the most likely topic under consideration. “Is the circus in town,” Ian asked once they were back inside the judge's chambers. “It could be worse … a couple of beat reporters for the local dailies, and one TV crew.” The Judge had taken advantage of the break to dash off to the men's room, which gave him a chance to size up the press contingent waiting outside the courtroom. “Emmett Bailey of WPPP News is once more on the prowl.” “That guy,” Ian groaned. “He was at the house last night, reporting live. Doesn't he ever sleep?” “No rest for the wicked,” the DA snorted. Bailey was as pushy as he was ambitious, and he wasn't above sensationalizing a story. “Anyway, is Spats on board?” “He is,” Ian confirmed. “If it's possible, I'd like to avoid the press. The best way to tamp down on this story is to protect the girls' anonymity. Since there are eleven girls back at the house who haven't been charged with anything, the media can't broadcast everybody's name without inviting a lawsuit for defamation. So, is there a back way out of here? A loading dock would be good.” “What do you have in mind?” Reynolds, like all of his colleagues, had used a trap door more than once to escape the press. “I'll ask Chief Mischof if he can scrounge up a bus from the Athletic Department. We get the girls on board, and we make a run for it.” “Let's get it done. My clerk has a phone Walt can use to make the call. Once we're set, Gareth will swallow his pride and introduce the diaper punishment. You get Bjornsen publicly to agree to it, I enter it in my order, and we all live to fight another day.” . . . . “Well, let's get you into one of these new diapers that Sarah bought yesterday, and see if they're as good as the salesperson says they are. You know the drill.” Vickie got to her feet, closed Rita's office door to give them privacy, and then began to strip. She didn't stop until she was down to her bra. Rita unlocked her diaper cover, and eased both the cover and vinyl pants down to her ankles. Vickie gingerly kicked them off before Rita inspected the thick, hospital diaper. “Dry,” she announced. “I'll set it aside for tonight's festivities.” Rita shifted around to examine Vickie's backside, and yelped in surprise. “My God, Vic! Never mind the diaper rash … you're bright red! What did Sarah do to you?” “She used one of her new toys on me … the paddle with the holes in it that she bought at Fantasy Island. It was the most painful spanking I've ever had, Rita, and believe me, I've had plenty of spankings!” “Oh, I believe you. I just don't know what to do about it.” “Nothing.” “What? Nothing?” Rita couldn't believe what she was hearing. “Rita, I … I enjoyed it. I was so close to coming … just a few more strokes, but she stopped right when I was on the edge. I begged her to finish me off, but she refused … locked me up in the same damned diaper. Only I liked that, too. Pissing and shitting myself … having Mommy coo over me like a baby while she cleaned me up … I was in Heaven. And then again this morning ...” Rita shook her head in despair. It was obvious that Vickie craved attention, and had discovered that being naughty would get her plenty of it. But if Sarah was a sadist only now coming out of the closet, this could get out of hand very quickly. Not waiting for the command, Vickie dropped to the floor, and spread her legs. “Rita, I'm so horny that I could scream. Please,” she whispered, “help me! Fingers … tongue … a cucumber … anything will do. Please!” “You want me ...” Wide-eyed, stunned, for the second time in as many minutes Rita couldn't believe what she was hearing. “Vic, no! Not at the office; hell, not even at home!” “My wand ...” “No!! Absolutely not!! Vic, are you crazy? Do you want to get us both fired?” Rita got down on the floor, and ordered Vickie to raise her hips so that the new diaper could be slid into place. Working hastily to put the nightmare behind her, Rita doused her diaper area with powder and worked it into her skin. As soon as she was finished, she pinned the diaper in place, then fetched Vickie's baby pants and cover. It was only when the lock clicked home that she could lean back, take a deep breath, and try to make sense of what had just happened. “All right,” she said in a tone of voice that brooked no opposition. “First things first. Go to your locker, get your Wand, and bring it to me. If you have any other toys that you're using to masturbate on company time, bring those as well. The fun and games are over, Vic, maybe over for good.” “But ...” “No buts, and no whining! If you need to do a regression to get past all the crap that your parents dumped on you, fine. I'm good with Sarah being your Mommy, and I'm even good with being your Auntie. I'll change your shitty diapers, and I won't complain about it. I'll do my best to get Sarah to tone it down. And all I ask in return is that you store up all this sexual energy for the only person in this universe who's worthy of you, and that's Ian. Sarah and I can parent you, but we can't love you the way he does. Do you understand?” “Yes, Aunt Rita, I understand.” “Then get dressed, and go collect your things.” Now that the crisis was past, Rita could afford to be gentle. “Then we need to start earning our paychecks!” “There's one more thing.” Vickie had stopped in the doorway. Rita looked at her expectantly. “We got a call late last night from one of the sorority houses. I don't know the details, but Ian was there, and he had another episode. Priscilla … the policewoman assigned to him was still on duty and dealt with it, but he never made it home.” Rita slapped her desktop, which told Vickie that she had come to a decision. “I'll tell Manny to expedite the 'diaper your favorite nurse' auction. When all three of us can trigger the Princess Poopy Pants persona, I want him back in the ward. We are going to hit him from all sides, trigger an episode in a controlled environment, and see it through to the end … a breakthrough. We are not, repeat not, taking a ticking time bomb into our new household!!” . . . . When they reentered the courtroom, Ian walked straight to the railing that separated him from Walt Mischof. It took only a few seconds for Ian to make his request, and for the Chief to confirm that he could have a bus ready and waiting in less than half an hour. While he was speaking on the phone, Ian rejoined Bernice and Priscilla, who were still hard at work trying to keep the girls calm. It was a daunting task. “May I have everyone's attention,” Ian asked in a calm, confident and reassuring voice. “Tippi, when we resume the Judge is going to ask the District Attorney to continue, which is when your proposed diaper punishment will be brought up. Then Judge Reynolds will once again ask whether you are speaking for the whole group. Say 'yes', then agree to being diapered for the duration of your probation, and we are out of here. We'll go out the back way to avoid the press, and Chief Mischof is arranging for a bus to pick us all up.” “You're coming with us?” Janis couldn't understand why the Professor was going to so much trouble to help them, but she was grateful nonetheless. “Yes. The rest of us will gather our wits in the hospital cafeteria while you track down whoever is in charge of the candy stripers. Then we'll dot the proverbial I and cross the proverbial T, get you home in time for lunch, and me off to my next class.” “And the gangster?” “All taken care of, Janis. Don't bother looking over your shoulder because he won't be there.” “But how?” “Oh,” Ian smiled wistfully, “I made him an offer that he can't refuse!” . . . . “Okay,” Ian said when they got off the bus, “I'll take the lead since I actually know how to find the cafeteria in this maze. Priscilla, why don't you bring up the rear to make sure we don't lose any stragglers. Bernice, you should go with Janis, and help her sell our story to the relevant party.” “How's your diaper holding up,” Priscilla whispered in return. “I've only got one spare in your bag, and we're running on empty at your office. We need to reload.” Ian winced. In all the excitement, he had lost track, which was an invitation to disaster. Leaky diapers … blowouts … both meant public embarrassment. His vinyl pants and canvas cover could only take so much abuse before they would give up the fight. “Sounds like we should pay Rita a visit. She's got diapers coming out of her ears, and now's as good a time as any for you to make her acquaintance. Once Bernice gets back and we have the girls settled, we'll sneak off.” A party of forty young women trooping through the hospital hallways was, Ian suspected, quite a sight, but the cafeteria was the only place he could think of to park them. And people were stopping and staring. For their part, the girls all wondered how many of the people they were passing had put two and two together, and realized that they were now face to face with the infamous diaper thieves who had been plastered all over the late night news only twelve hours earlier. Happily, at mid morning the cafeteria had few patrons, so Ian had no trouble commandeering two of the long trestle tables that dominated the room. While the girls sorted themselves out, Ian took Priscilla to the side. “Got any money on you?” “Some. Why?” “They had a bad night and a not so good morning. The least we can do is buy them all something to drink to soften the blow.” “Meaning?” “They don't know it yet, but they're going to be wearing the same hospital diaper that I'm sporting. That's part of the deal I made with Spats-- he gets to grow his inventory, and the girls will be paying for it.” “But they won't be able to hide what they're wearing ...” “No, they won't. The seniors are looking at six months or so, but there are first and second year students in this bunch who have two and a half to three and a half years of humiliation ahead of them.” “With no time off during the summer. Ian, what about their parents? The only way to make sure that they remain diapered is to use the same locking cover that you have on. Would you trust a parent with the keys?” “No. Bernice will change them morning and night, so she will need to have keys. We'll know in a few minutes whether it's feasible for them to be changed here during their shifts, but I can't figure out how to change them on campus. It's a big school, and they're attending classes all over the place. So, we're talking a lot of diaper pails; where do we put them? Who would be willing to change them, and can we trust that person with the keys? On paper it all looks pretty cut and dried, but this is real life, and in real life it's a safe bet that all of these girls will also be looking for a way to cheat. We have to nip that in the bud.” “This is what happens when you don't pay attention,” Priscilla laughed sympathetically. “Meaning?” “The DA and the Judge ran for the hills, Ian, leaving you hung out to dry.” Priscilla was rummaging around in her bag, searching for her wallet. “Twenty-eight dollars,” she announced. “And I've got seventeen.” It didn't take Ian long to paw through his wallet. “While you were daydreaming,” Priscilla continued, “the Judge issued a decree making you personally responsible for cleaning up this mess. An officer of the court will be dropping in on you next week, with the official paperwork. Congratulations! You now have forty one surrogate daughters!” “Huh? Wait a second. Won't they have probation officers?” “They will,” Priscilla agreed. “And guess who's responsible for making sure that each and every one of them keeps their appointments!” “But ...” “Ian? What are you doing here?” Startled, Ian spun around, his stance shifting to attack mode. Then, making a conscious effort to relax, he stood fully upright. “Becky! Hi! And Reiko. Wow … it's good to see you both! But I'm surprised; isn't this your shift?” “It is. Mornings are set aside for groups. Vickie takes the alcoholics, Candy gets the abused women, and Reiko and I split the hopelessly neurotic. We rack up a lot of overtime at Chuck E. Cheese.” Becky and Reiko were both looking at Priscilla. “Sorry,” Ian said; “I just got sucker punched, so I'm a little out of it. Pris, say hi to Becky and Reiko, who work upstairs in the psych ward. Vickie is mentoring them both.” “Priscilla Canon, campus police department.” Priscilla held out her hand, and the three women briefly shook. “Technically, I'm Ian's bodyguard, keeping those pesky corporate headhunters at bay, but it feels more like I'm his nursemaid.” “Changing his diapers, are you?" Becky and Reiko exchanged knowing grins. “Routinely,” Priscilla grinned in return. “And it's a fun job. Ian knows a really colorful cast of characters, and slowly but surely, I'm making their acquaintance.” “And these are the diaper thieves.” Becky gestured at the girls. “What, if you capture them, you get to keep them?” “He's stuck with them!” Priscilla was laughing so hard she could barely get the words out. “The court … the judge has charged Ian to supervise them throughout their probation. Right now, we're trying to figure out how to see to their diapers.” “Diapers? These girls?” Reiko was aghast. “All forty one of them … 24/7 until they graduate! They wanted diapers; well, now they've got them! And they're going to use them!” “What brings you down here?” Ian was desperate to change the subject. “Coffee break,” Reiko shrugged. “It's an excuse to get out of the ward for a few minutes.” “Got any spare change?” “You need money?” “I thought I'd buy the girls something to drink. They've had a rough morning ...” “Spoken like a true parent, although forty one daughters is a ...” Priscilla's eyes widened in shock, and involuntarily, she clamped a hand over her mouth. The enormity of her mistake … “Oh, God! Ian, I'm sorry! I didn't mean … I was just teasing … please … I'm sorry!” “Pris, it's okay.” Ian wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her close, her head resting upon his shoulder. He forgot about Becky and Reiko, forgot about the girls, forgot about the handful of visitors, nurses and doctors scattered around the cafeteria. His one thought was for her. Becky and Reiko were openly staring, trying to digest what they were witnessing. It was as obvious to them as to everyone else who happened to be watching that Ian and Priscilla were very much in love. “It's getting easier, Pris; really. Knowing that it's all out in the open now … that I don't have to pretend anymore.” He tenderly kissed the top of her head, enjoying the smell of her shampoo, enjoying the simple pleasure of holding her in his arms. “I love you,” he whispered in her ear. “I love you ...” . . . . “This stinks to high heaven,” Herb Canon complained. “Honestly, Julia, why didn't you say something?” “Walt's your friend; why didn't YOU say something?” The Canons were in the parking ramp adjacent to the courthouse. The trunk lid of their car was up. The trunk was bulging with the two bags of diapers that Chief Mischof had ferried from the sorority house to the ramp, but they had never gotten any closer to the courthouse, and the rules of evidence be damned. The Canons ignored the bag of clean diapers-- and they were keeping their distance from the dirty ones. “I don't remember Priscilla's diapers ever smelling this bad. Do you?” “Well, in fairness to Ian, they have been lying around for the last couple of weeks. But stop complaining. You can walk to work from here, and I'll drive out to Lullaby and deliver them in person. After all, I did promise Pris that I would retrieve Ian's little toy … and no, I won't pass out before I get there. I'll keep the window rolled down.” “It's your funeral,” Herb shrugged. “But here's something else to think about while you're rambling down the highway: who's going to change Grady's diapers and give him his bottles while Pris is at Quantico?” “Ouch! Herb, that is downright nasty!” “Come on, Julia, out with it! Has she asked you to do the honors in her absence?” “Not yet,” Julia conceded. “But any day now? Is that what I'm hearing you not saying?” Julia slammed the trunk lid shut as her temper flared. “Damn it, Herb, we have got to come to terms with this. Priscilla is old enough to make her own choices; she's fallen in love with a battle scarred vet, and she has chosen to commit to this relationship. If you can look past the diapers ...” “And the trauma,” Herb interrupted. He suspected that Ian was a loose cannon, and he did not want his daughter to be around when he blew up. “For which he is being treated by a network of professionals who are giving him a strong support structure. And in so many ways they make the perfect couple ...” “Couple? Get real, Julia! Our daughter is joining a menagerie that sounds like it's going to be one step shy of a hippie commune! Will our grandchildren, if we have them, nurse on four different sets of boobs? Will they grow up thinking they have four mommies? Julia, this in insane!” “It's life, Herb, and often life doesn't make any sense. The only issue here is Priscilla's happiness, and right now she's happier than I've ever seen her in her whole life. Our job is to support her, and to make Ian feel welcome. We are going to do that.” “So, if she asks … are you telling me that you would agree to change his diapers?” “I would agree to talk with him about it. But seriously, Herb, what on earth makes you think that he would want me to be his nursemaid? You're getting all riled up about something that has about the same odds as a snowball in Hell!” . . . . “I'm good with this,” Ian said as he peeked over Priscilla's shoulder, his eyes jumping from one face to another as he systematically worked his way from the top of one table to the bottom of the next. It was slowly beginning to dawn on him that the two of them had taken center stage in a vast theater that offered no other entertainment. “Being a surrogate parent, I mean. Do any of the sororities have dads?” “No … don't think it's ever been done before.” Priscilla leaned back to study him, and saw it instantly. It was in his eyes as he looked out at the girls, the sense of family, and she imagined that years earlier, a much younger man had looked upon those he led into battle with the same sense of affection. She knew all too well how much the death of Willie Ross had wounded him. And then his brothers-in-law. There must have been others. “This is a tad awkward,” she whispered, thinking of Vickie. “Have faith,” he whispered in return before kissing her lightly on the cheek. “Any idea how much soft drinks for forty three is going to cost me?'” Ian decided to address the question to Reiko. Reiko frowned as she quickly ran the numbers through her head. “Twenty five should cover it.” “What's going on, Ian?” Becky made no attempt to conceal her anger. “Give me a moment, please,” Without waiting for an answer, Ian turned away and walked over to stand at the head of one of the tables. He waited patiently for the girls to give him their attention. “First things, first,” he began. “While I had the run of the judge's chambers, I phoned Janis' mother. In turn, Marilyn is reaching out to all of your parents, to assure them that you are safe. She is also letting them know that each of you is being hit with a twentyfive hundred dollar fine. Be ready for the subject to come up when you get back to the house and call home. As for the other elements of the Decree-- the community service, the diapers, and the probation-- I strongly advise you to be straightforward, and not to attempt to defend the indefensible. Admit that you screwed up, concede that your punishment is warranted, even lenient, and move on.” Leaning on the table, Ian sighed deeply, searching for words. “Before Janis gets here and we get down to brass tacks, please get yourselves something to drink; Officer Canon and I will foot the bill. But first, there is something that I want to ask: does anyone here know what in loco parentis means?” “Sure,” Cindy answered. “Everyone on Fraternity Row knows that our house moms and dads are looking after us the same way our parents do at home.” “Well, as Priscilla … er … Officer Canon ...” “Batgirl,” Kimberly called out. “Is that what you call me,” Priscilla laughed. “From one end of the Row to the other,” Melanie confirmed. “Cool! Wait until you see the Batcycle! It's got all the bells and whistles!” “A Honda CB 750,” Priscilla grinned when Ian gave her one of those looks. “What can I say? The family that rides together stays together. I never miss Sturgis!” “Oh, wow, Sturgis,” Melanie shrieked. “I've got a Suzuki GT 750, but my parents won't let me ride it in the city, and they won't let me get anywhere near Sturgis. They're afraid that I'll join a motorcycle gang or something!” “Get your GPA up,” Ian suggested, “and Priscilla might be persuaded to form a club for all you easy riders.” “Are you offering us a bribe,” Kimberly teased. “More like an incentive. Look, as I was about to say before being sidetracked, Priscilla says the Judge's decree is going to charge me with supervising your probation. So, now you have a surrogate mom in Missus Miller, and in me a surrogate dad. Going forward, if you're having problems with your studies, come see me. If I can't help you personally, I'll reach out to people who can, and that includes arranging tutors. I'll collect performance reports on your community service, and you better believe that your probation officers will examine them closely. As for your diapers, let me remind you that all of you are going to be paying customers of Lullaby Diaper Service, and the bill is going to be around seventy five a month. There's another conversation to plan on having with your parents if you aren't working and don't have savings. Finally, acting in loco parentis and keeping your individual schedules in mind, Bernice and I will figure out a way for each of you to have her diapers changed in a timely manner, and that includes on campus.” “Any questions,” Ian asked as he scanned his audience. As he expected, his comments had taken the air out of the girls. There were long faces everywhere. “In the beginning, this is going to be hard.” Looking up, Ian saw that Bernice and Janis had returned, along with a nurse and a second woman wearing a severe business suit. “Some of the people you count as your friends will abandon you, but on the flip side, once the novelty wears off and your peers stop tormenting you, new friends will take their place. The one constant is that Bernice and I will always have your backs. We won't lose faith in you, and in return we ask only that you not lose faith in yourselves. Now, help yourselves to something to drink.” While Janis scurried off to join her friends in line, Beatrice stepped forward to make the introductions. “Officer Priscilla Canon of our campus police department and Professor Ian Grady,” Bernice nodded, “Marcia Mason, who is the first shift charge nurse in Janis' unit, and Gayle Soderberg, who administers Patient Relations. Her department reviews applicants for the candy striper program, with a view to finding the best fit for their experience and interests.” “I should add,” Bernice went on, “that I have brought them up to speed on what's happening here.” “Any interest,” Ian asked. Gayle nodded in response. “Definitely, but I will tell you straight out that we're looking for candidates able to work three hour shifts between seven in the morning and two in the afternoon … also six to ten at night. High School and College students all want to work between two and six; those slots are filled.” “Any objections to having staff change their diapers?” Marcia's smile was warm and friendly. “It's an unusual request, but everything that Bernice has told us would seem bizarre if many of us had not caught the late night news. Talk about the punishment fitting the crime!” “Glad you're good with it,” Ian grinned. “If it's at all possible, later this afternoon I'd like to get together with whoever does purchasing around here. Lullaby Diaper Service will need diapers, vinyl pants and locking diaper covers for forty one new customers.” “We might have enough to get you started,” Gayle said. “One key for our staff, one for Bernice, and two for you. Will you be changing them personally?” “Uh … no. I don't think my fiancee. Sarah Haikonnen up on the third floor, wants me anywhere around sorority girls in general, and definitely not changing their diapers in particular!” “Perhaps it's for the best.” Gayle and Marcia exchanged sympathetic looks. “We caught the tail end of your address. If these young women need a father figure to serve as a role model, they are fortunate indeed to have someone this caring.” “I just hope I don't go broke in the process,” Ian sheepishly replied, trying to find a way around the awkwardness of the moment. “Reiko says that their drinks will set me back around twenty five dollars.” “Oh, don't worry about it!” Gayle waved him away. “I'll put it on my departmental tab; light refreshment to help the interview process along.” “Thank you,” Ian sighed. “Can you hold the fort for a little while,” Priscilla interrupted. “I need to refill Ian's diaper bag, so we're on our way up to Seven … to talk with Vickie and Rita.” She gave Ian's arm an encouraging squeeze. The gesture's import was lost on none of the five women gathered round, and Bernice could see that one of the nurses standing behind Ian was seething. Long years of defusing angry confrontations had given her a sixth sense when it came to situations spinning out of control. This one was on the edge. “Ian, while we were reluctant to infringe upon your privacy, you should know that Janis and I also told Marcia and Gayle what happened last night.” Bernice's voice became soft and maternal. “Last night at the house … this morning in the courtroom and now here … you have formed a deep, visible attachment to the girls. I don't want anyone to misinterpret what they're seeing, nor to misunderstand all this talk about changing their diapers.” Bernice stared pointedly at Becky, praying that the message had gotten through to her. After they had put him to bed, Suzie had given her a colorful description of Ian's complicated love life, and it was obvious that this nurse was close to one or more of the women involved. She had been triggered by the interplay between the professor and the policewoman. As for the young Asian woman: her expression was stoic, but her body language tense. It was safe to assume that she was also upset by what she was seeing. “Cracks in the wall,” Ian observed with a resigned sigh; “cracks in the wall.” “Which means?” “Bernice, I'm a patient here, up on the seventh floor … the psych ward. In fact, Reiko and Becky are on the team that is treating me.” Belatedly, Ian realized that, when it came to introductions, he had not picked up where Beatrice had left off. “Sorry,” he said. “Bernice Miller, the sorority's house mom, and Reiko … I'm sorry again. I don't know either of your last names.” “Doctor Reiko Matsumura, and my colleague and friend, Doctor Rebecca Cameron.” Reiko performed the introductions for both of them. (In reality. Ian was formally introduced to Reiko all the way back in scene 3, but the poor lad was far too drunk at the time to remember much of anything.) “Vickie and Rita are going on the theory that I've constructed a wall inside my head to keep all the guilt that I tapped into last night at bay.” Ian knew that neither Bernice, Gayle or Marcia grasped how bad last night had really gone. “If I do something that my psyche sees as a threat to the wall, it short circuits the process by catapulting me back to my last battlefield. I relive what happened … every second of it … and I collapse, just like I did for real all those years ago.” “So when you told the girls what happened to your family ...” “I thought I was safe because yesterday I told Priscilla everything, including the really bad stuff that only two other people have heard at first hand. And it had no impact on me … maybe because it felt like I was talking about somebody else … talking in the third person.” “'Bad' doesn't begin to describe what happened out there.” Priscilla warned. “I have been pushing Ian to sit down with Sarah, Vickie and Rita; they have to know what's going on … have to know that acting on their feelings for him will have consequences. There's a price to be paid, and I'm going to pay it … but I didn't sleep well last night, not well at all. I do not want him to describe what he learned once he got out of the hospital in any detail. What you heard last night is where I would draw the line.” “You want him to withhold information that might be critical to his treatment,” Becky asked sharply. “I would go there only as a matter of last resort.” Priscilla's tone was equally acerbic. As the first of the girls exited the line, soft drink in hand, Gayle excused herself to begin the interview process. She had brought applications for the candy striper program, and as she handed out forms and pens to each girl in turn, she emphasized that she needed to know their class schedule for the following term. Marcia watched the line slowly advance. She had two children of her own, one a girl in junior high. In a few years, she realized, her daughter might well become a candy striper in her own right, and stand in this very line once or twice a week. There were always a number of high school students in the program. “Professor … no … Ian … who's taking the lead on your therapy?” “Vickie.” “And the two of you are madly in love.” Marcia shot a sideways glance at Priscilla, wondering if Vic knew that she had been cast overboard. “Vickie and I will work it out,” Priscilla smiled. She knew exactly what Marcia was thinking. The line continued slowly to advance, and Becky and Reiko continued to hover in the background. Nodding her head, Marcia came to a decision. Someone had to go first. “Ian, Gayle and I … we both have children … daughters. The vast majority of the people in our age group working in this hospital have families. I'm not going to pretend that I understand your suffering because it's on a scale that I can't imagine, and frankly don't want to imagine. But I know two things, the first being that you are trapped inside every parent's deepest, darkest nightmare. And the second is that Becky is right; if you want to reclaim your life, you cannot pick and choose the information that you share with your therapist. If you insist on shielding her, then Vickie needs to step aside so that someone can take her place-- someone who can handle the worst that you can throw at them.” “It's not that easy,” Ian grudgingly admitted. “Why?” “I have trust issues.” “And cracks in the wall.” Ian looked at her blankly. He didn't see the connection. “You can't make good what you've lost by adopting every young woman in need of help who enters your life. You'll drown if you try … more and more seizures. If you truly want to help others, you must first help yourself, and that means baring your soul to your therapist. Guilt attaches itself to the ugliest of all our memories.” Wendy Stafford, Priscilla thought. How many more Wendy Staffords are waiting out there? Her eyes swept over the line, and settled on Janis Marsden. The answer was staring her in the face. “Wait … what,” Becky squeaked. She looked at Reiko, thinking that she must have misunderstood what Marcia was saying, but she saw the same look of incomprehension on her friend's face that was no doubt plastered on her own. “Are you saying that … that … Ian … that you have a daughter?” Silently, Ian pulled out his wallet, and removed the photograph. No longer hidden away, it slid out easily. He handed it to Becky. “My wife's name was Nguyen. When I was in the hospital, someone came to our village and slaughtered everyone except the babies and little children. They were taken, and have never resurfaced. We think that someone was looking for my child … for my daughter, Linh. But they didn't know which child was mine, so they took them all.” “But … but, why? Dear God, why?” “My gift for languages is rare in the extreme. More men have walked on the moon than can do what I do. If Linh has inherited this ability ...” “Someone massacred an entire village to kidnap a child that might grow up with the ability to speak dozens of foreign languages?” Becky was thunderstruck. “Ian, does Vickie know any of this? Vickie? Rita? Sarah?” Reiko got right to the point. “No. No one wants to put another My Lai on the record, and very few people even know that there was a massacre. Reiko, my whole life after Hue is heavily classified; it was only yesterday afternoon that I received clearance to talk about this with anyone. Priscilla knows it all, and when we get upstairs, so will Vickie and Rita. I'll deal with Sarah later.” “But why, Ian? Why, after all these years, are they suddenly allowing you to go public?” ”Reiko, I blindsided the Agency, and now we're scrambling to do damage control. I was supposed to live a quiet life out here, but instead I foolishly agreed to help Phil and Don. It was a spur of the moment decision, and it felt right at the time, but it ended up wrecking my cover, which was never designed to survive even casual scrutiny. A part of me is glad that it worked out this way because lying to the women I love has been tearing me apart. But at the same time, it's putting my daughter in great danger.” “Go on,” Reiko gently encouraged. “For years, we have been looking worldwide, an intense but quiet search. Now that I've surfaced, we are going to recruit people outside the intelligence community to assist, which will make our efforts impossible to hide. If we get too close ...” “They'll kill her.” Priscilla had followed everything Ian had said to its logical conclusion. “We can get coffees up in the ward,” Becky decided. “We'll take you up.” “Marcia and I will help Gayle,” Bernice declared. “And now I'm a bodyguard for real,” Priscilla sighed. “And first things, first: I still have to change Ian's diaper!”

Chapter 11 : Diaper Dependence? Welcome back, my JJ Fam. Are you enjoying the warm fire that got started by TikTok? Admit it. You just had to get your mandatory fix of watching Diaper Girl once again. But let me tell you, JJ Besties. Get prepared, because that gasoline just got poured on that fire and it’s about to explode. So you thought that things were crazy now with that video and all the new traffic that I was getting for my JillianPlays channel? This is only the beginning. The beginning of my crazy journey into a new future. A future that I was uncertain of whether or not I wanted to accept it. My incontinence was getting worse, and I wanted answers. Yes, the wine made me piss myself and puke all over the floor. But something just didn’t make any sense about my worsening incontinence. No wine can magically make someone incontinent. As I laid in bed the night before, I started thinking about the words that Glytter spoke to me. Look at the details. My twin sister was the only key to figuring out what those details were. After giving CBS Philadelphia my rejection, I pretty much just focused on getting things ready for my streams. Considering how many subscribers I was gaining every day since the day of the Diaper Girl video, Twitch was slowly turning into my job. Gary briefly stopped by during the day to drop off my Trest Diapers that arrived that day at his house. Gary had not been on Twitch since Saturday, so I made no mention of the TikTok video or my new Twitch numbers. He would learn about that soon enough. I just helped him carry the 15 bags of 10 Pink Trest diapers into my room. I stacked the bags in my closet and closed the door. By the time that I completed my stream that night, I had nearly 200 new subscribers. Most of the Tier 1 Subs were actually Prime Subs, since they used their Amazon Prime account to get a free Twitch sub. While it was free for them, it was still $5 for Twitch. Twitch kept half while I kept the other half. During today’s stream, I managed to complete the Forest of Illusion and finish most of Chocolate Island. Unlike yesterday, I wanted to talk to my twin sister about what happened during the night that I first came to Philadelphia. The night that I ate at The Capital Grille. That one bottle of Walt, Las Brisa, Sonoma Coast. That one bottle of red wine that made me get so wasted that I couldn’t even remember anything on the way home. Jen had all the answers, and tonight, I was going to get every last one from her. I opened the door to Jen’s bedroom to find my twin sister in a midnight blue silk pajama set with a button down tops and matching bottoms. My sister was laying on her queen-sized bed with a large leather book opened in front of her. It looked like the Bible. When Jen saw me, she took a bookmark that she had nearby and stuck it between the two pages that she was reading before closing the book and setting it on her bed. “Yes Jill? Was there something that you wanted to discuss?” Her face lit up. “Oh Jill! Is this about CBS Philadelphia? Did they call yet? I’ve been praying, Jill. I’ve been praying every day…” I shook my head. “No Jen. This is not about CBS Philadelphia. This is about day one. The very first night that I came here to Philadelphia…” Jen nodded, and gave me a pensive stare. “Did you want to talk about the restaurant? The Capital Grille? What did you want to talk about, Jill?” Jen tapped an area on her bed that was right next to where she was sitting as an invitation for me to sit there. Understanding the cue entirely, I took the very spot where she tapped so that I was right beside my twin sister. “Now,” Jen began. “What did you want to know about your first night?” I sighed. “First of all, I would like to address everything that I can’t remember during the night that I ate at the Capital Grille. Now I can remember having my dinner, and I can definitely remember drinking the entire bottle of Walt, Las Brisa, Sonoma Coast. As delicious as that wine was, I could not remember anything else after that. Can you please fill me in, Jen?” Jen nodded, and sat quietly for a few moments while she tried to remember everything that happened that night. “I remember! Jill, you were very loud and obnoxious, and we had to quiet you down a number of times. I ordered a Classic Crème Brulee for both myself and you, since you just kept blankly staring at the menu when I asked you what you wanted for dessert. Joey, of course, got the Capital Grille Cheesecake.” I nodded. “What else? What happened after we left?” Jen scratched her head. “After that, both Joey and I had to help you out of the restaurant, because you couldn’t even walk straight. Why, you couldn’t even maintain your balance! Several times, you told us in a drunken slur that you could walk yourself out. You then wanted another bottle of wine. That’s when I reminded you that you had way too much to drink…” I sighed. “I can’t even remember saying any of this!” Jen nodded. “Of course not! You were black out drunk! It was almost like you were sleepwalking. Now, after we helped you out, we both decided to drive you back to the apartment, as it made no sense to walk you back all by myself. As Joey was getting his white Mercedes-Maybach, you got very angry at me. I knew that it had to do with you being drunk. You told me that you were going back by yourself but were going to get a drink on the way back. You then RAN towards the curb and stepped off it towards the road. You then made a few paces forward past the curb. When I called back for you, you pivoted and ran back towards the curb. ‘Jill, the curb!’ I shouted, warning you about the curb that you were about to hit. It was too late. You tripped on the curb and fell right on your pelvis against the pavement. I checked for any wounds, but you only had a few scratches on your face. Joey then assisted me in helping you into his SUV and he drove us back to the apartment. Other than that, I just got you ready for bed. In the middle of the night, I heard a loud scream, and then vomiting. Then I heard you cry. That’s about it. And when you blacked out again, I got you right to the shower to help you wash off all the vomit and pee. Is that all you wanted to know?” I gasped. “Wait! You said that I ran towards the curb and tripped?” Jen nodded. “Yes Jill. It didn’t look like the fall was that severe, but I think that your abdomen and legs took most of the fall…” I glanced down at my pelvis. “Wait a second…Jen, how hard would you say that I fell on my stomach, pelvis and legs?” Jen shrugged her shoulders. “From where I was standing, I could not tell how hard the impact was…Wait! Do you think that the impact from that fall could have possibly damaged the nerves around your bladder?” This suggestion from my sister was almost enough to make me burst into tears. I didn’t want to believe that such a fall could have caused so much trauma to my bladder and its ability to function properly. I shook my head in disbelief. “No!” I shouted in denial. “I’m going to wait and see what the doctor says…” Jen could now sense that I was about to lose it again (call it twin ESP). She immediately wrapped her arms around my side and sighed. “But Jill…What if the doctor tells you that your nerves are damaged and that this happened as a result of you tripping over a curb while you were drunk? Are you going to tell them that they’re wrong and you’re right? Or are you going to just accept the reality and learn to live your life as it currently is?” I didn’t like either answer that my sister gave me, so I just remained silent. My silence turned into tears as I began to bawl into my sister’s silky pajama top while she softly patted me on both sides of my stomach…” “Jill, Jill…” My sister said, trying to comfort me. “I know that you don’t like the cards that you were given, but it is my prayer that you learn to accept them. Don’t you remember what Trisha told you? You need to own it. Please Jill. Own it. Own it for your twin sister who loves you very much…” I nodded as I stood up in a loud crinkle. I glanced underneath my night gown. While the wetness indicator was still yellow, I could tell that I had already soaked the Huggies Overnight diaper, and that it was about to flood into the Certainty diaper. Just seriously. After nearly two and a half months of bladder issues, am I really going to accept this reality as my new normal? I wasn’t about to. Perhaps the doctor could resolve this problem…I hugged my sister, and I made my frustrating walk back to my bedroom as I pouted over the diapered reality that I had to deal with. I got in my queen-sized bed as I felt the need to pee immediately vanish as my bladder voluntarily emptied on its own accord. It was almost like it was teasing me, as if it gained its own independence. My bladder no longer took orders from me. It just operated now whenever it pleased. The Huggies Overnight diaper was now overflowing into my Certainty diaper, which now began to swell and expand between my legs. But that wasn’t felt by me for too much longer, as I quickly fell asleep. Both Thursday and Friday were basically more of the same routine. While Diaper Girl wasn’t growing out of control, it still managed to gain another million views per day. It was up to 4.3 million views and 388,000 likes on Thursday and 5.4 million views and 498,000 likes on Friday. Oh, and one very important thing worth noting was that my Certainty Unisex Fitted Briefs ran out on Thursday. I was so ready to try a Trest as I wanted to put them to the test… The pink Trest felt even more like a diaper than the Certainty Briefs. I could already tell that the absorbent core was a lot thicker and that the backing was made of plastic instead of cloth. I wiped, creamed, powdered and fastened on the new Trest diaper, securing both thigh tapes towards the landing zone and both waist tapes towards the landing zone, giving myself a snug and comfortable fit. As I put my ankle length skirt back on, I could already notice how much louder the Trest diapers were. The crinkle from the plastic backing was a lot louder and more noticeable than the Certainty diapers that I was getting used to. I put it on at lunch time and didn’t take it off until my second stream break. As I was finishing lunch on Thursday, I got a text message from Glytter. I glanced at the text message and read it: “Did you get my packages?” That reminded me to check my mail. I went to the lobby of Metro City apartments and sure enough, there were two different packages. One was a large box and the other was a small mailer envelope that had something small in it. I took the packages back up to 2202 and opened them in my bedroom. Both packages said that they were from an Alyssa Evans in Pittsburgh (I am keeping her house number and street confidential at her request.). The smaller package had what looked like a baby diaper, but it was adult sized. It featured a print of a lion on both sides. It reminded me in every way of the Pampers Baby Dry that I used to wear when I was a baby. The larger box had four large plastic sacks of 10 diapers each. Like the adult-sized baby diaper that I already opened, these plastic bags had more adult-sized baby diapers. They were called Tykables Animooz. The remaining contents included five single adult-sized baby diapers all individually wrapped in plastic. All of these single diapers had a different print design on it. I gasped at all the diapers. I had no idea that baby diapers for adults actually existed. I immediately called Glytter, still in shock. “Hi Jill! Did you get the packages?” I nodded, still looking very surprised. “You bought me baby diapers for adults?” I heard Glytter laughing for a few seconds before she responded. “Yes Jill. They’re actually called ABDL diapers.” I was dumbfounded. “ABDL? What is ABDL?” “ABDL, Jill! AB stands for Adult Baby. DL stands for Diaper Lover. It’s an 18 and up community of consenting adults that all participate in this kink lifestyle.” My jaw dropped. “But Glytter, I don’t know if I really LOVE diapers. I’m at the point where I just have to wear them, no matter what…” “Exactly, Jill. That’s why I bought those diapers for you. You opened both packages, right? The first one is 40 Tykables Animooz and 5 sample packs. One Tykables Overnight, One Tykables Waddler, One Camelot, One Pink Cammie, and one Unicorn. While the samples are all plastic backed, the Animooz is cloth backed. The other package is one sample pack of the ABU Little Kings. Are you out of those pharmacy diapers yet?” I nodded. “My boyfriend Gary, you know him as GaretheBear, bought me 15 packs of Pink Trest diapers…” I heard a gasp on the other end. “Oh. Trest! I haven’t tried them, but I heard from friends that they’re really good.” “Friends? What other friends do you know that wear diapers like I do?” “Jill, didn’t you hear what I said about ABDL? To be very forthcoming and transparent with you, Jill, I am an ABDL, and I love both acting and dressing up like a baby. You could say that I’ve had this fascination my entire life. I can honestly say that I’ve never grown out of it.” I was almost beyond words at this point. “So, you’re telling me that you not only love diapers, but that you like to dress up like a baby?” “Yes Jill! And I love pacifiers, baby bottles, blankies, stuffies, onesies, footed sleepers, rompers, overalls, shortalls, bibs, baby toys, and various other things that a baby loves. It’s part of the little in me that I have fully come to love and embrace.” I now had a look of bewilderment and disgust on my face. “That is just totally cringe. Why regress and act like a baby?” “Why not, Jill? I find little space very therapeutic for me. In fact, my therapist encourages it all the time. She calls it regression therapy and it’s a wonderful way to deal with the stressful things in your life. Now, we both are incontinent and need to wear diapers 24/7. Wouldn’t you want something to better deal with that monotony on an endless basis? Incontinence never takes a day off, Jill. Both you and I know that…” I nodded. “You have a point, Glytter. So you’re telling me that wearing ABDL diapers and acting like a baby is going to help me deal with my stress?” “Yes Jill. All I’m asking is that you approach it with an open mind. Now I know that you are probably still stressed out and dealing with the stress from that Diaper Girl TikTok, right? We’re still fending off the weirdos for you every day!” I nodded, as I began to glance around the room in impatience. “Yes, and all 24 of you are doing a good job. I’m thinking about appointing a few more mods to take the load off of you all. I mean, my numbers keep growing everyday…” “Yes. Now, you are going to get a checkup on Monday morning? Don’t forget to ask about therapy. It’s not cheap but at the rate that your channel is growing, I think that you’ll be able to afford it. Plus, you will need that to deal with everything that you had to face the day I discovered that TikTok video…” “Yes Glytter, and it also forced me to reject a job offer out of fear of being fired right after they would’ve hired me…” I said, almost crying. “I’ll keep an open mind and give this ABDL thing a try…” “That’s good, Jill. Just go with it. Let your little side run free. I see that you’re plenty stocked on Trest so I won’t send you any more diapers for a while. Would you like one of my Glytter pacies? Another one of my hobbies is making pacifiers for fun…” I gasped. “You make your own pacifiers? This keeps getting weirder…” “Jill, that’s because you keep using the adult side of your brain! Turn it off and relax. Yes. Remember how I told you that I run an etsy business? How I made cute little outfits that mothers can buy for their little ones? I left out my bit about my ABDL pacifier business since I didn’t want to weird you out during our very first meeting on Discord. I make a pretty decent amount of money off of it, along with my etsy clothing business…” I sighed. “How much for the Glytter pacifier?” “Oh! How much, Jill? It’s free. I’m giving it to you free. Normally, it’s worth $25, but you’re worth it! I will also send you a few other surprises that I think that you will like. Ask about therapy and ask about a urologist…*yawn*” I gasped after realizing that Glytter hadn’t said anything for a few seconds. “Glytter, are you there?” “Yes Jill! I’m here. I’m usually very tired this time of day. I’m usually tired after I have my lunch. I’m going to take a nap…” I gasped. “You’re that tired?” “Yes Jill! You do remember me telling you that I’m a dwarf. Well, dwarfs are smaller, so we tire easier. Even though I like to think that I have an endless amount of energy…*yawn*…I’m sorry…I’m going to have to let you go. That one time that you shouted if I was there…I was half asleep…*yawn*…Going to take a nap…Nice talking to you, Jill…*yawn*…Enjoy the diapers. See you at 3:00 for the stream…*yawn*…Bye…” I hung up and glanced at the diapers that Glytter sent me. By the looks of them, it looked like Glytter got the right size. They all read medium, which was the same size as the Trest diaper that I was currently wearing. Now later on, I had my stream. And from what I found out, I was shocked at just how much these Trest diapers could hold. I just had my second huge wetting and it still felt like it could take more before it started to feel soaked. Instead of changing my diaper during my normal break, I just left the room to stretch. I finished Chocolate Island and got through most of Valley of Bowser. There was one Level 5 Hype Train, due to another 10,000-bit donation that was left by Lamtastic (Lamtastic never ceases to amaze me with their generosity). The icing on the cake was another 10 gift subs by Lamtastic. And by the time that my stream ended that night, I had 172 new subs. Most of these again came from Prime Subs. In fact, most of my Level 1’s were Prime Subs from the get go. The only exception was the Level 1 that I received from GaretheBear. His other two level 1’s were gifted subs to JtheCalcugamer (Joey) and JennyPenny2001 (my sis!). That night, I just couldn’t resist. Instead of wearing my Pink Trest diaper overnight that I changed into during my second stream break, I tore open the plastic on the Animooz Diapers. I picked up the diaper and saw the cute animal prints of different animals on the Velcro landing zone. This one had a red bear and a blue elephant on it. I folded it out on a towel that I had laid in the room for diaper changes and gasped. When I folded open the front wings and back wings, it looked just like a baby diaper, only adult sized. I glanced at the yellow outline of the diaper and fluffed it. I pulled out the enormous leg cuffs and gave that diaper a good powdering with Johnson & Johnson Lavender baby powder (they were out of the Aloe and Vitamin E). I opened up the slightly damp Trest diaper and began my diaper hygiene procedure. I wiped, creamed, and powdered myself after laying on the center of the enormous diaper. I folded the diaper between my legs and fastened the thigh tapes, and then the waist tapes to the landing zone. I glanced down at the diaper again and gasped. These tapes were Velcro, just like a Huggies or a Pampers. The diaper felt soft and comfortable. I waddled forward in the Animooz diaper and smiled. I’m guessing that this is why Glytter got this for me. It’s so comfy. The last time that I wore a diaper like this was when I was about three years old. It was a Huggies Overnight Diaper since I was wearing panties during the day and pull ups when I had just one daytime accident. I then went to sleep, suddenly feeling the warm sensation of my bladder emptying itself into the diaper. I then felt that satisfying feeling that I felt when I wet a diaper for the first time as an adult. I felt…small. I felt…little. I felt totally helpless as I was peeing away in that diaper. But that didn’t matter to me. I enjoyed that feeling. That feeling of being a helpless baby. If this is what little space is, I would like to explore more of it. All I know is that I look forward to what Glytter has in store for me… Friday came and went. I was still in my Animooz diaper, and I wore it until lunch time. I then showered and changed into another pink Trest diaper. During lunch, I gasped. Those ABDL diapers that Glytter sent me sent a chill down my spine when I thought about my boyfriend. Gary can’t find out that I’m wearing them. Sure, he knows about my incontinence but he knows nothing about my little side that I am just beginning to explore. With that, I carefully stacked the Trest diapers in front of the Tykables Animooz diapers. It wasn’t like Gary was going to open my closet and invade my privacy. He respects me too much. But even with that being the case, I just didn’t want to risk him somehow discovering my ABDL diapers even though I trusted him in respecting my privacy. During that stream, I finished almost all of Valley of Bowser, except for the Front Door and Back Door, since I was told by chat that I still needed to work on the Star Road. So, I completed the Star Road and unlocked another star on the top of a mound. Rather than continue, I called it a stream, telling everyone that I would continue on Monday. During the weekend, I had another fun date with Gary. Even with the three Trest diapers that I packed in my “diaper bag”, I only had to change my diaper once the entire time. For this date, we had lunch, a movie, and then spent the rest of the day at Gary’s house for a stream. I once again excused myself to the bathroom and changed into a new diaper during Gary’s stream. (As much as I loved that Animooz diaper the other night, I didn’t want to waste this pink Trest, so I was just going to wear it overnight.) After some convincing from Jen on Sunday, I decided to go to church with her. I had a fresh Trest on, so I probably wouldn’t need a new diaper the entire service, and even into the early afternoon. I went with Jen and her boyfriend Joey to a rather large church. It had a large auditorium with a stage where the worship band played, and the pastor gave his sermon. This looked nothing like the church that I went to growing up with Jen and my parents. It felt more like a movie theater than a church when I was in that auditorium. The music was very good and catchy, though. The message was about dealing with life’s difficulties. The pastor said something about Christ being able to help us deal with these problems that we face. Especially when we had things in our lives that we couldn’t control. This hit me hard, as I thought about not being able to control my bladder. As the message was wrapping up, I was quietly weeping. I think that I had a couple of large wettings in the diaper, but I couldn’t tell considering how much more absorbent this diaper was compared to the old Certainty diapers. After the service, Joey drove Jen and I to a breakfast place that both Jen and Joey liked to eat at after church. I got the Philly Cheesesteak Omelet, which was the best omelet that I ever had. The Cheez Whiz and the cheesesteak paired perfectly with the onions, peppers, and mushrooms that were with the three eggs. To make my omelet perfect, I doused it with Tabasco Sauce. With such a delicious breakfast, perhaps I should go to church with Jen and Joey more often. For the rest of the day, I went into my room and checked Diaper Girl on TikTok. To my surprise, I noticed a bunch of other versions of Diaper Girl in the related videos. In these versions, other girls were wearing jogging pants, having a diaper peek out just as much as it did in the original video. They did the same exact crouching and standing “dance” as I was doing in the original, with Salt-N-Pepa’s Push It! (TMW Remix) playing. Same beginning and same “Baby Baby” refrain. There was even a Diaper Guy, which was exactly the same version, only a guy was in jogging pants with a cheap pharmacy diaper slightly peeking out, executing their standing and crouching twerk to the original “Diaper Girl”. Most of these versions linked back to the original Diaper Girl and as a result, the original Diaper Girl now had 15.7 million views, and 1.14 million likes. I still could not believe it. With all the derivative versions of Diaper Girl all linking back to the original, this was making Diaper Girl even more viral. How could this get any more crazy than it already is? I surely did not want to know the answer to this. I exited my room and watched my twin sister play Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Her island was much more built up than mine was, and she had a lot more Bells than me. I smiled and watched her play for much of the rest of the day. The next morning was the day of the checkup. I felt a little nervous since I realized that I would be getting a physical. This meant that I would be standing right in front of the doctor, wearing just a robe and a diaper underneath. I wouldn’t be able to take my diaper off as I would risk getting piss all over the exam room. With the appointment being at around 9:00 AM, I had to get up earlier than usual. I showered and proceeded with my diapering routine with the Pink Trest diapers (I love these considering that I only have to wear about 2-3 per day instead of 5 of the Certainty diapers). What made things especially hard was that I couldn’t eat anything for two hours before the exam began. With it being 8:10, I drove off to the Penn Medicine University of Pennsylvania clinic and arrived about 20 minutes early. While I waited in the waiting room, I checked Diaper Girl on TikTok once again. I couldn’t believe it. Diaper Girl now had 20.4 million views and 1.8 million likes. I also noticed many new Diaper Girl videos made by copycats that wished that they could be just as good as the original. Like most of them, they linked back to the original, feeding the viral meme even more. After clicking on what was probably the 30th Diaper Girl video that I watched, my name was called. “Jillian Jenners.” The female medical assistant called. “Dr. Davis will be with you shortly. Let’s get you ready to see her…” I nervously smiled as I grabbed my backpack purse. I knew that I probably wasn’t going to need it, since I was wearing a pink Trest diaper, but I just wanted to be sure. The young female medical assistant guided me through the double doors and then led me down a narrow corridor that stopped at a scale. She turned to me and smiled. “Jillian, we’re going to get your height, weight, and blood pressure before you have your exam with Dr. Davis…” She slid the stadiometer down until it rested over the top of my head. “Five foot four and a quarter inch.” She read. “Now step onto the scale.” I stood on the scale while the electronic numbers registered. “147.8 pounds.” She read. She then strapped a blood pressure cuff around my arm and turned on the sphygmomanometer. About 30 seconds later, the cuff deflated. “107 over 65. Very good. I’m going to take you to the exam room.” I followed the medical assistant a short distance down the hallway and into an exam room. The medical assistant handed me a gown. “Remove all of your clothing and put this gown on…” I gasped. “But…” I nervously approached the young medical assistant. “Um, I can’t remove all of my clothing because I’m medically incontinent and will pee all over the exam room if I remove my diaper…” I said to her blushing in a hushed tone, as I realized that my diaper was feeling very warm. The medical assistant now looked a little embarrassed herself. “Oh? Okay. Well, you’ll want to keep that on then. Don’t worry. Dr. Davis may have to reach down there to make sure that everything is healthy. But don’t worry about it. Take everything else off, but keep that on, okay? Dr. Davis will be with you shortly…” I nodded, as I watched the medical assistant leave with a reddened face. After the medical assistant left, I took off my lavender ankle length skirt, my white satin top, and my red Victoria Secret bra leaving me in nothing but my pink Trest diaper. I quickly covered myself with the hospital gown and tied it on myself. That was just enough time before Dr. Davis entered. Upon my first glance, I was greeted by Dr. Davis’s warm smile. She looked about middle age but looked very healthy and young for her age. She wore a white lab coat and was holding an electronic tablet which I was guessing was my medical records. “Jillian!” she shouted. “I’m Dr. Samantha Davis. So you’re here for a physical today? A bit early, but is there any reason why?” She walked over and lifted my hospital gown to reveal my pink Trest diaper. “Oh…I guess you will need to keep that on. Now to clarify, you have designated your sister as a personal representative, so all HIPAA information can be disclosed to her.” I nodded. “That is correct. She is my twin sister and I live with her…” Dr. Davis nodded. “I see. Now let’s get started with the exam.” Over the next 15 minutes, Dr. Davis began asking various health-related questions, and some relating to my mental health. For income, I told her that I was a Twitch Streamer that entertained other people by playing video games. She then got to some questions pertaining to my incontinence. “Okay…” Dr. Davis said as she glanced at her chart. “Everything in the trunk and underneath the hood looks good. But that diaper…I need to ask you a few important questions pertaining to this if you don’t mind.” I nodded. “I don’t mind. Ask away. That’s why I’m here!” “When did you start to wear diapers?” she asked me. “June 23rd.” I answered her. “Prior to that, I was wetting the bed every night for a week.” “Ahh…” she nodded. “This bed wetting. Did it ever happen in your childhood?” I nodded. “Only a couple of times when I was five. After that, I had no other accidents until I was an adult.” “When did you have your first accident as an adult?” “June 16th.” I told her. “What did you think caused you to have a nighttime accident?” I gave the doctor an uncomfortable smile. “Well, the night before, I first arrived in Philadelphia to live with my sister, and she wanted to treat me with her boyfriend at The Capital Grille. They let me order my own bottle of wine. Now I don’t really drink alcohol at all, so I just went along with it. I ordered a very expensive wine: A Walt, Las Brisa, Sonoma Coast. This was a 115-dollar bottle of wine that was so good. But it made me very drunk for the rest of the night. The next thing that I remember was crying on the floor while laying in a fetal position. I was already back at the apartment and there was vomit all over the place and I was soaked in pee. I thought that it was the wine that started my incontinence, but now I think that it might be something else…” Dr. Davis gasped. “Wow! What a night! If it wasn’t the wine, what did you think caused your incontinence?” I frowned. “Well, my sister was with me to tell me every detail that I couldn’t remember. While my sister’s boyfriend was getting his SUV to come closer to pick us up, my sister told me that I was starting to make my way back to the apartment, but then she shouted at me. Now remember that I have no memory of this happening. After she shouted at me, I, totally black out drunk, ran back to the restaurant. I was only a short distance off from the curb. But I was so drunk that I didn’t even see the curb. So, I tripped over the curb and landed right on my pelvis. My sister told me that everything below my stomach cushioned the fall. But I’m afraid that I fell on my pelvis so hard that I might have caused some permanent nerve damage, which has affected my bladder. That’s why I’m here!” Dr. Davis made a few notes and nodded. “That sounds like quite the fall! What it sounds like is a pelvic fracture. There could be some lateral compression fractures, but I will definitely need to see some x-rays to know what the damage is. But before we make any decision on this, do you feel any pain in your hips?” I shook my head. “Any abdominal pain?” “No.” “Any numbness or tingling in your groin or legs?” “None that I’m aware of.” “Any bleeding from your vagina or rectum?” “No bleeding. Just the normal bleeding from my periods.” “Okay. Do you have any difficulty urinating?” I laughed. “I have difficulty NOT urinating! Seriously. I can’t control it…” The doctor nodded. “Okay. Any difficulty walking or standing?” “None. I can walk and stand just fine.” Dr. Davis nodded and scribbled a few more notes. “Well, it can be ruled out as a minor fracture then. What I’m going to do is order an x-ray, and then you will be taken back to get that done. While it’s not urgent that you complete it today, I myself would recommend it, as it seems that your incontinence is severe enough that you need to wear diapers. And if you can’t even control your bladder, that’s pretty severe. Now there are some risks associated with the x-ray, Jillian.” “Jill,” I corrected her. Dr. Davis nodded. “Excuse me…Jill. The x-ray will cause minimal cellular damage to your body. Are you willing to undergo the x-ray?” I nodded. “Yes. I want to know what is causing my incontinence…” “Okay.” Dr. Davis told me. “I’m going to fill out an order for the x-ray procedure. The exam is finished, and the only thing that I recommend is that you go on a diet and get some exercise. You are a little overweight. Anything else before I make the order, Jill?” I nodded. “Can you refer me to a urologist and a therapist? I would want the referral to getting into a urologist first.” Dr. Davis nodded. “Sure! Let’s see…” She made a few clicks on her pad. “I have a Dr. Kimberly Saunders for Urology and a Dr. Bridget Stillman for Therapy. I’ll put in both referrals after I order your x-ray. And we can send her the x-ray when you have your appointment with her. You can set up the appointment once the referral has been approved. I’ll be right back. You can put your clothes back on, but that diaper will need to be off long enough for a pelvic x-ray. I nodded. “Thank you!” Dr. Davis left, and I put my red bra back on, along with my short sleeved white satin shirt and lavender ankle length skirt. About 30 minutes later, Dr. Davis came in with the radiology team. “Jill,” Dr. Davis addressed me. “The radiology team is going to take you to another room to do an x-ray on your pelvis. Take your brief off and you can put it back on when you’re done.” I blushed. “I will need a new diaper. The tapes will tear the plastic off the waistband.” The doctor and the radiology team nodded. “We’ll let you do that when the x-ray is done.” Dr. Davis said, before dismissing me to go with the radiology team. The x-ray team took me to another room where they laid me down. Fortunately, I felt some warmth in my diaper before we entered the room, so I think we’ll be good for the x-ray. I removed my diaper, so I was wearing nothing underneath my skirt. In just a few seconds, the x-rays were taken of my pelvis. They directed me to the nearest bathroom, and I got a fresh diaper out of my “diaper bag” and threw the wet diaper away. I did all the usual diapering routine and put a new pink Trest diaper on. I folded my skirt back down and was done. After I got home, the rest of the day was a blur. On my stream, I discovered a new world called Special World and the levels were so hard that I spent most of the stream trying to complete Tubular. I finally completed it to an audience of now over 400 viewers (audience count was 416). This resulted in a Level 10 Hype Train. And Oh. My. Gosh. At least 30 streamers donated 10,000 bits. That’s around $3,000 worth of bits by 30 very generous streamers. I’ll use that for today’s physical and x-ray… Because of the Hype Train, I decided to complete a couple more levels in the Special World. Fortunately, these levels were not as hard as Tubular. These levels were Way Cool and Awesome (Really. That’s what those levels were actually called. I am not making this up!). I ended the stream, telling everyone that we’ll probably finish Super Mario World next time since I only had the rest of Special World, plus Bowser’s Castle to complete Super Mario World. I told Jen about my appointment and was happy to hear that it went well. The next day, I got the referrals approved from both Dr. Saunders and Dr. Stillman. The earliest appointment that Dr. Saunders had was October 27th at 9:00 AM. I sighed and I took the appointment. That day on stream, I completed the remaining levels in Special World and finished up Bowser’s Castle. With that, I finally beat Super Mario World. To pad the time, I spent the rest of the stream playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons. That night before I went to bed, I checked Diaper Girl again. It now had 41 million views and 3.7 million likes. This video was truly going viral now and showing no signs of slowing down. At this point, just about everyone on TikTok was trying to copy the Diaper Girl video by filming their own version of it. This made me laugh. Just how many people were running to the pharmacy just to buy some diapers for a TikTok? By Friday, Diaper Girl reached 100 million views and 9.6 million likes. At this point, I was seeing every kind of cartoon character and movie character doing the Diaper Girl Dance. Nobody even had to wear a diaper to do the dance, either. All they had to do was stand, crouch, stand, crouch, and repeat. Mario did the Diaper Girl Dance. Sonic did the Diaper Girl Dance. Frodo Baggins did the Diaper Girl Dance. Even Stewie from Family Guy was doing the Diaper Girl Dance. Various anime girls did the dance. Large groups of people all did the dance, complete with jogging pants and diapers just barely peeking out of them. Just out of curiosity, I turned the channel to KYW-TV. I was just in time for the evening news, which I was watching during a stream break. My sister was on a date with Joey, so she wasn’t home. “Good evening, Philadelphia.” A woman news anchor announced. “I am Rita Larson and tonight’s top story is the latest sensation that has been taking TikTok by storm. What do you get when you combine an 80’s hip hop song with a young woman doing a standing and crouching dance in jogging pants with a diaper just barely peeking out? You get Diaper Girl, the latest viral meme to hit the internet. Logan Peters has the story.” “It’s strange. It’s catchy. It’s hip. But what is Diaper Girl? To find out, our investigation requires a little observation. On CrayCrayJay’s viral Diaper Girl Video, you can clearly see the link to a Twitch Channel. We follow this link to find a Twitch Streamer named JillianPlays. On JillianPlays’ August 15th stream, we find JillianPlays taking a break. When she comes back from the break, we notice that she is actually wearing a diaper. A little bit of her diaper is clearly visible and we see the similar worried look that we recognize in the TikTok. She then quickly sits down. This was the original footage that was remixed by CrayCrayJay to make the viral video. We tried to contact both CrayCrayJay and JillianPlays, but neither has contacted us back. Meanwhile, the traffic from the Diaper Girl video has grown JillianPlays from only 156 followers to over 38,000 today. Meanwhile, Diaper Girl continues to evolve in popularity. From everyone’s own version of Diaper Girl to Diaper Girl being danced by various different cartoons and characters from various films. We even saw Mario dance to Diaper Girl, if that wasn’t weird enough. How will Diaper Girl continue to change? Well, with 100 million views today and just 6 million views on YouTube, there’s no telling where it will go next. Logan Peters. CBS News, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.” I shut off the TV and gasped. It was a good thing that I decided to reject the offer. I cannot imagine how embarrassing that would’ve been to report a story of a viral video that I was somehow caught up in. That very story would’ve resulted in my termination the same night. But on the other hand, my Twitch channel was still doing amazing. At the moment, I had 38,152 followers (38,454 after the stream ended). And for the month of August, I had a total of 2,579 subscribers. I made $6,680.25 off just my subs. If you add in all of the numerous bit donations that I received that month, I made a little more than $10,000 in that one month alone. And that’s the freaky part. Considering that my channel hasn’t stopped growing yet, there’s no telling how much that I will be making next month. That night, after my stream was over, Jen was home, and she wanted to know if CBS Philadelphia called me back yet. At this point, I had to tell Jen the truth. As much as it would hurt her, I needed to make what I felt was the best decision, given the embarrassing circumstances that I was up against. “Well Jill?” she asked me. “Did they call?” I sighed. “Yes Jen. They called. On August 15th, they offered me a job. I rejected it.” Jen gave me a look of shock and shook her face in disbelief. “No!” she shouted. “Don’t tell me you turned that job down! You turned down your dream job, Jill! YOUR dream job! What am I going to do?” Jen stopped speaking, as she was too upset to say another word. “Well Jill, since you blew it, I want you to get a job. Any job. It can even be at a McDonald’s! Just get a job already!” I sighed. “Jennifer! Do you think that I wanted to turn that job down? While I was LOOKING at the job offer, Glytter showed me something awful on TikTok! Now I know that you don’t have a TikTok or want to use one. But look at mine! Some idiot posted THIS!” I showed Jen the Diaper Girl video, which now had 116 million views and 11 million likes. Jen shook her head. “That’s you!!! Some jerk on your stream caught you in a very embarrassing moment and decided to broadcast that to the entire world at your expense. That is such a STUPID video! Why would anyone watch it? TikTok is stupid…” I sighed. “I know. But everybody is copying it now, and it’s becoming wildly popular…” Jen sighed. “And that person is using your embarrassment to make themselves some money. Now Jill. I WANT you to get a job tomorrow…” “Jen!” I shouted. “That TikTok video is the reason why I didn’t take the CBS Philadelphia job. Just tonight, they broadcasted a story on that TikTok viral video. Had I been the anchor that announced that story, they would fire me, no questions asked. Why did you think I rejected the job? I didn’t want to, Jen…” Jen nodded and began to weep. “What are you going to do, Jill? That Twitch stream of yours isn’t going to make that much money. Just go job hunting tomorrow. Get a REAL job. Good night, Jill…” I gave my twin sister a hug and sighed as she left the room. My sister doesn’t know that this is slowly becoming a very successful channel. One that can make a lot if this crazy traffic from the TikTok video keeps happening. I got out of my job search on Saturday, since Gary took me on a date. By now, Gary knew about the controversy regarding the Diaper Girl meme, since someone told him about it on the stream. He was completely disgusted by it but considered it good karma since the TikTok video kept funneling traffic back to JillianPlays. “You have more than TEN times the followers that I do now!” Gary said with a gasp. “And you made $10,000 last month on just Twitch? That’s crazy! Your sister needs to know that Twitch is turning into a real job…” I sighed. “Tell that to her. She doesn’t want anything to do with Twitch right now. And she’ll just call you a bad influence…” The date continued and I watched Gary do his GaretheBear stream. I got out of my job search on Sunday as well since no one was supposed to work on Sundays. I went to church with Jen and Joey again and I enjoyed another delicious omelet from the same breakfast place (I didn’t get the Philly Cheesesteak Omelet this time, but the Jalapeno Popper Omelet. Yum! So good! On Monday, I was given strict orders from Jen to look for work, even though Twitch was already my job. When I was about to “look for work”, Dr. Saunders office called and asked if I wanted to move my appointment to September 15th. With that being six weeks sooner, that was an obvious yes. To continue my “looking for work”, I continued working on my YouTube channel that I started in late August called JillianPlays. It would have all my VOD footage edited into different “Parts” that people could watch for Let’s Plays. I was hard at work dissecting all of my old footage back from when I played just NES games. All of that was going to be added to the channel. Having started with 25,000 subscribers in late August, I now had 34,000 subscribers. I mean, my sister never said that I couldn’t do YouTube for a job, right? Besides, I already made almost $500 off of YouTube from just last week! My sister was disappointed when I told her that I was working on my YouTube “job”. I then worked on my Twitch “job” at 3 until 9. I was on an Animal Crossing kick so that’s all I did for the whole stream. For just today, I gained another 6,546 followers and another 1,388 subscribers. That’s almost another $3,000 right there but was even more than that, due to another crazy Hype Train full of bits and some crazy user gifting 50 subs to the community. About a week and four days later, it was time for my appointment with the urologist. Dr. Saunders was ready to see me, so I entered her office. Dr. Saunders tapped her hand on a couch cushion. I sat down, and she sat next to me. “Jillian Jenners,” she said, managing a smile. “Is Jillian okay or do you go by Jill?” “Jill is fine,” I nervously muttered. “Well Jill,” Dr. Saunders said, pulling up some information on a computer tablet. “I examined your charts, your health history, and your x-rays. I have some good news and some bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?” My cheeks puffed red, and a couple of tears began to form in my eyes. “The bad news. Just get it over with…” “The bad news is that your incontinence was more severe than I thought.” She said with a frown. “Let me explain this to you in a way that you can understand it, Jill. The x-rays revealed a lot of nerve damage between your bladder and your spinal cord. It was a minor pelvic fracture. You see, Jill? Whenever you pee, the nerves and muscles of the urinary system work together to help your bladder hold and release urine. But in your case, and in the cases of most patients that I treat as a urologist, there can be damage to these nerves giving you a condition called neurogenic bladder. This is a condition that prevents you from having effective bladder control. You may have difficulty emptying and voiding your bladder, which is underactive bladder and a sudden unaccounted urge to urinate, which is overactive bladder. Now there is no cure for neurogenic bladder…” That was it. When I heard the words “no cure”, I burst into a crying fit in front of Dr. Saunders. I then pointed my finger to her in anger. “What do you mean that there’s no cure?!!” I snapped. “You’re a doctor for crying out loud! There’s just gotta be a cure! You gotta help me! Please! Please….” I continued staring at her in a series of hiccup sobs and sniffs. Dr. Saunders sighed. “Jill, is it okay if I put my hands on your arms?” I nodded, with my face to the floor. Dr. Saunders gave me a hug. “Jill, it’s going to be okay. I haven’t told you the good news. The good news is that while there is no cure for your incontinence, there are many ways to manage and treat it. Would you like to hear some of the treatment options?” I nodded, still unwilling to accept my new reality. “Here are the options, Jill. There’s medication, urinary catheterization, botox injections, surgery…we can give you an artificial urinary sphincter, electrical stimulation, diet, or Kegel exercises.” I sighed as I glanced down at my waist. “What about diapers?” Dr. Saunders laughed. “Yes Jill. Diapers can help in the treatment. Don’t feel ashamed that you wear diapers. A lot of my patients do. And can I let you in on something? This is what I tell every one of my patients that struggle with incontinence.” I nodded. “Jill, I am incontinent myself and I need to wear diapers 24/7.” I found myself smiling just a little bit. “How did you become incontinent?” Dr. Saunders grinned. “How? It happened during my freshman year in college. I was going to be on the US Olympic Team for the long jump, triple jump, and high jump. I was at a track meet and my jumps were going perfect, until the very last jump. This was for the high jump. I vaulted over the bar with the pole and instead of sticking the landing, I made a very hard landing on my pelvis. In the next days that followed, I was having great difficulty in holding in my bladder. I was wetting the bed every night like you were. And Jill. When my urologist told me that there was no cure for my incontinence, I freaked out just like you. What do you mean that there’s no cure? I want to be a world famous Olympic athlete! I of course did not pursue that path, Jill. Instead, I made it my life goal to help people struggling with their own bladder problems. So, I became a urologist. I hope that my story helped you, Jill. It usually helps a lot of my patients.” I nodded. “Thanks. For now, I don’t want any of the treatments. Just the diapers will do. What do you think of the Trest diapers?” The doctor’s face lit up. “Trest? Jill, that’s what I primarily wear. I like to wear all the different colors, even though I can’t see them underneath my clothing. Yes. If you’re wearing Trest, that’s a good brand. NorthShore MegaMax’s are also good. Don’t use the pharmacy briefs. Those are only designed to hold small wettings. Not the kind that we deal with every day. So you want diapers as treatment? I can put in a script for some NorthShore MegaMax’s. They will be shipped to your residence discreetly so no one will know that they’re diapers. I nodded. “Thanks Dr. Saunders. I think I will manage.” I got up and I left the doctor’s office. As much as I hated the new reality, it was now with me for the rest of my life. Like it or not, I had to wear diapers. And if I wanted the new reality to be more bearable for me, I now had to like diapers. My JJ Little Besties, this was the painful discovery of my lifelong incontinence. But knowing that I had a friend who was incontinent, I was not alone. Glytter recommended ABDL and little space as a way to cope with all of my stressful problems. And having to wear diapers 24/7 was now going to be a constant source of stress for me. My JJ Little Babies, are you ready to be little? Are you ready to just let that inner child of yours come out and play? Get ready, my besties, because Jillian Jenners is about to discover and explore a new side of herself that is about to give her a lot of relief and comfort. She will learn how to heal that child within her that is so hurt inside and how to let it play when it wants. Little space. ABDL space. Regression. Toys. Diapers. Pacies. Rattles. Teething toys. Baby clothes. Yes. Jillian Jenners is about to jump down the rabbit hole and learn all about the exciting world of ABDL.

Edit: I don't know what the formatting issue is, but feel free to read this again in a more comfortable and viewable font and please leave comments unrelated to this formatting mistake. I started this on Christmas break, but I did not post it because it wasn't complete, so I guess you get to read it out of season. I would like feedback other than, "It's almost the end of April." There are two Christmas songs that everyone hates and I included them both. I also included a Christmas song that I hate too, which really started the thing and gave me the idea for the story. What if Christmas songs came true with the consequences of a bad genie wish? Santa Baby I lay down on the bed in my dorm room submitting to a diaper change from my roommate. “When is this ever going away?” I asked. I shivered as the cold wipe ran over my privates and then slid around on my bottom. “It’s your own fault,” said Sherry. “I warned you about that song. So what did the doctor say?” “Ugh,” I said. “He said nothing is physically wrong with me and it’s all psychological, but both the incontinence and ‘53 convertible in blue are real.” Sherry pulled the front of the diaper between my legs and taped the diaper shut. I sat up and held my arms up as she got me into my dress. “Thanks for putting up with this,” I said. “It’s embarrassing that I have to ask for help since I can’t undo diaper tapes. That is also psychological because I am not so weak I can’t untapped a diaper.” “No problem, Liz,” she said. “You are letting me drive a convertible wherever we need to go out. I don’t mine pampering you a bit.” So how did I end up being diapered by my roommate after completing an entire semester and most of my life without having a single accident? In this story, I will tell all about it. After the first semester, my roommate Sherry and I put an ad up on the bulletin board for a ride home from college for Christmas. Our ad was answered by a young man name Henry or Hank as he preferred to be called. He was from the next town over to us from when we were in high school and Sherry agreed to take him with us, so the three of us rode toward home. We walked out to the parking lot with our luggage and Hank waited for us. “Hi. I’m Hank,” he said. “Well, you probably know that.” “Let’s get things loaded up so we can go,” said Sherry She led us to her old Nissan that had seen better days and opened the trunk so we could put our meager amount of luggage inside. We each only brought enough to get through winter break and not much else. We didn’t even bring our computers, but left those in the dorm. We piled into the car and Hank took shotgun. I had to sit in the back with Hank’s bag of laundry. The seats in the car were threadbare cloth seats and paint was peeling and rusting. He laughed. “I’d never thought I’d be fraternizing with two Dragons,” he said. “I was a lineman for the Fighting Eagles, so I would never have hung out with you two in high school.” Sherry frowned. “We are all Cardinals now. High school stuff doesn’t matter anymore.” “Right,” he said, “Let’s head off to Dragonland. I want to be home in time for my mother’s Christmas Eve dinner.” We drove through the college town. The completely empty college town that had been empty for two weeks so far, but all three of us had to be in town because our bosses at our part time jobs didn’t want to give us off. Sherry turned on the freeway and then we immediately got behind bumper to bumper traffic. “Looks like all these cars are trying to get away on Christmas Eve,” said Hank. I sighed, but then Sherry asked, “Well, I usually take the state highway, but I thought the interstate would be safer if we ran into a snow storm, don’t cha think?” “That makes sense,” I said, “but I need to be home for Christmas. This is the first Christmas my family is getting together since the pandemic ended.” Hank seemed to be quiet as we crept along the freeway, but by the time we reached the next exit, Sherry pulled off the freeway and drove back toward the state highway. “I want to get home too, so I guess we are not taking the freeway.” Once on the state highway, we drove along at a much faster pace. The car had warmed up nicely and I leaned against Hank’s laundry and fell asleep. # I woke up as the car slowed down. I looked around, but Sherry had driven off onto a side road and we were headed toward a small town. “What’s up?” I asked. I could barely see ahead of us due to the snow coming down. It almost looked like we were going through hyperspace on the Millennial Falcon with the snow coming down. “I just stopped for gas,” said Sherry. “I didn’t fill up because gas is so much more expensive in our college town. They raise the prices just for students leaving during break.” The car drove toward a small town. “I don’t like this,” I said. “The weather is pretty bad.” “It’s fine,” said Sherry. “We just get gas and then we get back on the state highway and continue on our journey home.” We pulled into the town. I read the sign out loud. “Welcome to Christmas Town. Absolutely no singing of Christmas songs is allowed.” “Cute that the town is called Christmas Town, don’t cha know?” said Sherry. She pulled onto a roundabout in the center of town which went around a small pond. “No Christmas songs allowed? What are they going to do if I sing in the car?” He began to sing. “Grandma got run over by a reindeer. Coming home to our house Christmas Eve?” I saw it first. There was a blur of brown fur and then a terrible crash and the spun out and rolled over and landed on the roof. We were pushed into the frozen pond by the momentum. “What happened?” asked Sherry. “I think we were hit by a deer or something,” I said. “Are both of you all right?” asked Hank. “I’m fine,” said Sherry. “I’m a bit shaken up, don’t cha know.” “I landed on your laundry bag,” I said, “so that broke my fall.” Suddenly, there was a cracking sound, and the rear of the car fell through the ice and sank into the water. I immediately was drenched as I plunged under the icy water. The front of the car was still above the broken ice and Hank and Sherry got out before the rest of the car slid into the icy pond. I was in an immediate panic. I could barely move, I was so parallelized by the cold, but I kicked off the backseat into the front seat and managed to swim out the door to the top off the ice. Strong hands grabbed me under my arms and pulled me out of the water and onto the ice. I shivered and couldn’t feel my feet or my hands, so Hank had to pull me across the ice and back onto the road. “What are we going to do? Liz got soaked and she’ll freeze to death because it’s so cold outside,” said Sherry. Around us was the downtown area of the town with it’s frozen pond in the center where our car had sunk into the icy hole. At first I had shivered as the icy cold water bit against my skin. However after a few minutes, my clothes stifled me and I had to take them off. I shrugged off my wet coat and started to take down my bluejeans. “What do you think you’re doing?” asked Sherry. “Leave your clothes on.” “But I’m so hot,” I complained. Hank took both me and Sherry by the collar and steered us to the nearest building. It was locked, but he took a long metal hook from his pocket and slid it into the crack between the two glass doors and popped the lock open. We walked inside. I was still hot and pulled my unzipped pants down and then grabbed to pull off my wet t-shirt. “Liz, it’s cold. Don’t undress or you will freeze to death,” said Sherry. “No. She needs to take off those wet clothes before she freezes. Let’s find something warm and dry for her. Until then…” He removed his coat and wrapped it around me since I had stripped to a just my underwear.” “No, I’m hot. I’m burning up,” I complained as he zipped his coat around me. I felt like I was sweating and I really needed to get his coat off of me. The building was piping hot and hot air blew on me from the vents. I wanted to go outside where it was not so hot and wait until we could call a tow truck to get Sherry’s car out of the pond. “I’m going to wait outside,” I said. “I really can’t stay in here.” Suddenly music began to play and when I protested about being in the building my voice came out as a song. “Well I really can’t stay.” Hank spoke up but his voice came out in a song. “But, baby it’s cold outside.” “I've got to go away.” There was something weird about this place. “Baby, it's cold outside,” said Hank. “This evening has been…” I started to say. “Hoping that you'd come in,” said Hank I tried to slip off the coat he loaned me, “It was so, very nice” “I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice,” Hank took my hand and held them. I literally felt like my hands were burning from his touch. We needed to get the car out of the pond and go home. “My mother will start to worry” “Beautiful, what's your hurry?” “My father will be pacing the floor” “Listen to that fireplace roar.” The building did have a nice roaring fireplace and there was a Christmas tree near by. The building was a department store and there were shelves of stuff, and there were lots of supplies. But I wanted to go home. “Maybe we can get a ride.” Hank held me back from going out the doors. “No cabs to be had out there.” But I really can't stay Baby, it’s cold outside.” Sherry even spoke and they sang together, “Baby, it's cold outside.” Hank held his coat shut around me. “Ugh, you're very pushy, you know?” Sherry sang loudly, taking over for Hank, “Think of you parent’s sorrow,” “But we can just hang outside,” I suggested. “If you got pneumonia and died” “Baby, it's cold,” said Sherry “Baby, it's cold outside,” Sherry and Hank sang together. Suddenly I felt very cold, even though Hank’s coat, which was warm and down filled should have warmed me up. “Ugh,” I said. “I’m freezing.” I shivered and Sherry led me closer to the fire place. Hank walked around the store and then came back. Sherry hung my wet clothes over from the fireplace mantle. I looked at my wet bra and panties hanging next to my jeans and t-shirt and blushed. They were old underwear and weren’t the nicest and I didn’t really want Hank to see them. However, I was not about to put my icy clothes back on until they dried. Hank came back. “There are racks where the clothes were hung, but they’ve seemed to have been emptied.” Sherry shrugged. “I didn’t find any coats.” “I wish we were at my house,” I said. “There are probably plenty of dry and clean clothes in packages under the tree. I had asked Santa for some new outfits.” “It’s too bad Santa can’t come by and bring us some clothes and even give us a lift,” said Hank. Music began to play from the clock tower outside. I stood without being able to stop myself and walked over to the Christmas tree. “Don’t you dare sing this song, Liz. It infantilizes women.” I sang anyway, “Santa baby, just slip a sable under the tree For me Been an awful good girl Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.” I grabbed the sable coat and put it on after dropping Hanks coat on the floor. The I turned back to the tree and continued to sing. “Santa baby, a '54 convertible too Light blue I'll wait up for you dear Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.” A old fashioned convertible appeared next to the Christmas tree, I had everything I needed to dress warmly and get home, but I wanted more. I continued to sing. “Think of all the fun I've missed Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed.” I kissed Hank and as I leaned over the tail of my coat rose over my bottom. It felt like my butt expanded a bit as well. “Liz, what are you wearing under the coat?” asked Sherry. “That’s a diaper, don’t ya know.” I ignored her and continues to sing. “Next year I could be just as good If you'll check off my Christmas list,” I sang. My crotch suddenly felt wet and hot as my bladder released with no warning. I thought of what else I wanted. Should I asked Santa for a new boat or jewels or should we go for a deed to a duplex? I chose the duplex. “Santa honey, one little thing…” I soiled myself, the mess squeezing into the diaper, but I continued to sing despite the smell. “I really do need…” Sherry grabbed me from behind and put her hand over my mouth. “Hank open the front door.” He ran to the entrance and opened the double glass door, then ran back to us. “Put Liz in the car and do not let her sing. Whenever we sing Christmas songs, they come true. And this song is making Liz regress into a baby.” He dragged me kicking and squirming into the back seat of the car. I couldn’t get the lyrics out because his hand covered my mouth. Sherry hopped in the front seat, started the car and peeled out of the store, squealing tires as she swerved around the pond. She drove through the slushy streets throwing up a wake of snow behind us until we reached the highway. I tried to get out of Hank’s grasp and sing for my duplex, but he kept his hand clamped over my mouth. When I tried to sing though his fingers he pinched my nose so I couldn’t breathe and held me that way until we left the city limits of Christmastown. He let go of me and I looked down at myself. I was no longer uncontrollably singing. However, I wore only the sable coat and a diaper. The diaper was wet and messy and I smelled. I felt the mess against my skin and looked down at myself in shame. The sable coat was warm, but my infantile garment on my lower half took me completely by surprise. “What had I done?” Sherry pulled over. It was cold and we were in a convertible. The heat was on, but the warm air just floated out of the car. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of me, but she focused on getting the top of the car put up. The three of us sat in the car as the heater warmed the inside. I looked around sheepishly. “I, uh—” “I told you that song infantilizes women,” said Sherry. “There is no way you would knew I would end up in a dirty diaper from singing this song. This is worse than freezing.” “There’s a duffel bag in here,” said Hank. He opened it and pulled out a diaper. “It looks like a diaper bag.” I shook my head. “No way,” I said. “Just get cleaned up,” said Sherry. She stepped out of the car and Hank got out and joined her. I took the diaper bag. I hadn’t seen it and I certainly hadn’t asked for one from Santa, I sighed and looked inside. All I could find for clothes was more diapers. I thought about going bottomless, but it was cold. Instead I grabbed a clean diaper and some wipes and prepared to clean myself. However as I pulled the tapes they were stuck fast and I couldn’t get them undone. “Sherry,” I said. “I can’t get the tapes undone.” She joined me in the back seat and watched me struggle with the tape. She then pulled on the tape and it came right off. I couldn’t get the wipe container open and she finally had me lay back as she changed me. “How did you get that tape undone?” I asked. “It’s so sticky?” “It just came off, don’t cha know,” said Sherry. “Should I put a clean diaper on you?” I nodded. “There are no bottoms and I don’t have any other clothes, unless we want to go back for my blue jeans.” “We better not go back or we might sing a song that has even worse consequences,” she said. She dress me in the diaper and I just pulled my sable coat down to cover my lower half. Hank got back in the car with us and Sherry drove us home. I wet once more on the way home. When I got ready for bed that night Sherry got me out of my diaper and I put on my regular clothes. I wet the bed that night and then as the day progressed I found out I was incontinent. It sucked, but Sherry diapered me the rest of vacation. When we returned to school, Sherry and I made a deal. She could drive my car, but she had to change me until we could find a cure. Somehow I thought we might have to return to Christmas Town to find a cure, but I didn’t want to be trapped there if we sang an even worse song. Maybe the price of being a greedy girl singing Santa Baby was incontinence and diapers. At least we got a nice car out of it. The End.

hewo im baby ashes but my real name tony im 43 but age regress at 2 im a 24/7 abdl i love being a little and hope to make lots of friends xo i am pansexual and submissive

Thanks to @DiaperboyEddie12for donating $20 and making a purchase through my northshore affiliate link!

@Reddy I am also having surgery to remove my prostate and part of the bladder neck. This is due to severe retention from BPH. The procedure I will be having done is the HOLEP. My doctor said do to the state of my sphincter (partially atrophied from years of overflow incontinence) I my not regain control. I told her it doesn't matter as long as the UTIs are in the past.

Hey everyone! Getting into the thick of the plot now, I hope everyone is ready for what is coming. I plotted a few of the next chapters out a little more thoroughly yesterday instead of editing this one, so apologies for not getting another chapter up, but I think some of the outcomes will be well worth it in the end. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 10: Seeing Loss Everywhere Times had only grown tougher being around Nancy recently. I tried to make her happy, going as far as to start drawing her dozens of pictures while my magical stuffy, I dubbed Patch, kept me safe in daycare. It was frustrating to go there and then realize that I had lost something after nursing from Nancy, but at home, things were only worse. At daycare, progression was at least the name of the game, but at home, me being more of a Little was the true goal, Nurse Bee only encouraging Nancy the whole time. The two had become nearly inseparable recently and both seemed to delight in figuring out new ways I had broken some arbitrary rule in which they could punish me and attempt to regress me back. Spankings, timeouts, and loss of privileges all were inflicted on me as punishments to try and tweak their formula like a bunch of sadistic scientists torturing a lab rat. While they were effective on one level and I occasionally retreated into myself and didn’t act as mature as I could, I still burned inside to break free of my former prison that was my body. It wasn’t much, but it kept me going. While I continued that struggle at home, daycare had become much more of a minefield lately as far as the staff were concerned at least. Mrs. Gillies seemed frustrated and perplexed about my whole situation while Miss Valerie and Miss Tully were amongst the chief instigators into Nurse Bee’s activities here. Nothing violent or sinister had happened so far, and I hoped it never would, but I just wondered how long it was until I was proven wrong. To me, it seemed more like a certainty rather than a maybe at this point if nothing happened to prevent it. To my shock though, one day after work, Nancy had just brought me home and was starting to work on dinner for the two of us. Pleasant smells wafted to my nose, and I was just glad to be smelling something other than baby powder or other less kindly smells these days. No doubt, knowing Nancy lately, my food would be spiked with something to make me feel even more babyish, such as laxatives or numbing agents, but I still felt content in the smells for now at least. Suddenly, though, there was a knock at the door, soon followed by a heavy pounding. It scared me a bit and I backed up behind a couch in fear of who was there. Nancy, seemingly just as nervous as I was, approached the door carefully and then slowly opened it. On the other side was a clearly panicked Nurse Bee. “Oh? Bee? What are you doing here so late? Did I forget to write something down on my schedule between us or…?” “No,” Nurse Bee responded quickly. “I came over here on my own, but let me in. We need to talk.” Even I could tell the seriousness behind her voice, and so it was no surprise that Nancy let her in. After a moment of Nurse Bee sitting on our couch and Nancy retrieving her a steaming cup of tea, Nancy sat down opposite of her, clearly itching to ask some questions. “I know you have questions, Nancy… Just ask them…” Nancy sighed and, trying to stay out of both their ways and strictly wanting to stay neutral in all this, I came out from behind the couch and just continued to mess around with a simple Princess Poppy doll that Nancy and Nurse Bee had selected out for me. I wasn’t the biggest fan of it, due to what they were trying to get it to represent in my life, but the fangirl in me with the show still appreciated her in my life. Patch, being owned by the daycare and not strictly mine, had to stay there. My own Princess Poppy served as a nice substitute in his absence at home. “Well, what ‘s going on?” Nancy finally asked. “You obviously seem stressed about something, so just talk to me. Maybe I can help? I’m pretty good at advice and…” Nurse Bee shook her head strongly. “No, no. It isn’t that, Nancy. It’s just that… well, I think I could be in trouble here. There’s a lot going on, but there’s something more pressing tonight as well…” Nancy raised an eyebrow to get her friend to continue with what was happening. “I quit my job tonight, Nancy…” There was an eerie silence and I had to clutch onto Princess Poppy extra tight to keep from dropping her in shock. I thought I was done for and doomed in the daycare with the dynamic and loathsome duo of the new Nancy and Nurse Bee. Now, I felt there was hope. Small, perhaps, but still there at least. “What?” Nancy exclaimed, clearly panicking and just as shocked as I was. “What do you mean you quit? Can you even quit that place? I thought you were just interning there or something?” Nurse Bee nodded. “That’s right. I was, but I was also biding my time until something new came up.” She paused and still seemed flustered tonight. “That all changed this morning.” “Oh?” Nancy seemed both happy for her friend and curious about what she was referring to. Nurse Bee nodded. “I really can’t tell you much, but I came up with a special kind of cream. It’s a little… wicked maybe, but I just submitted it to Juventas to test out with a new position in their company that just opened there. Well, and this morning, I just got the call they want me.” I could see the saddened look on Nancy’s face, but it soon turned to at least one of happiness for her friend. “I’m so happy for you, Bee. I really am.” Nurse Bee smiled back. “I’m glad to hear you say that. I think someone might be watching me, but I’m just not sure.” I quickly thought back to Omega Force. “Plus, with all the heat I’ve been getting from Mrs. Gillies and the other staff members after Emma’s incident and then her sudden rebound, I felt that I couldn’t stay there for much longer anyways…” Nancy’s smile persisted, but the rest of her face soon morphed back into one of subtle disappointment. Nurse Bee saw and rubbed her friends back. “It’s going to be okay though for you two. I know you probably think I’m abandoning you right when you need me most with Emma but let me get something from my car and I’ll be right back. I think it’s going to help you a lot.” In her own little sad state tonight, Nancy nodded and let Nurse Bee leave the house to get something from her car. Nancy paced back and forth anxiously for a while, but finally, we both heard the locking of her car from the outside before Nurse Bee walked back in… but she wasn’t empty handed. “What’s that?” Nancy immediately questioned, looking right at the large crate now in her friend’s hands. It seemed old fashioned, almost handmade even, but I saw a few letters on the side. I had recently discovered my ability to at least identify letters again. Spelling them out was next to impossible beyond some of the more basic, like dog or cat, but I was still making progress. The word on the side though, was anything but simple. So, I decided to spell it out first and then maybe just try and figure it out later. ‘T-A-N-A-S-S-U-M.’ Nurse Bee smiled and set the box down in front of Nancy. “Well, I won’t tell you everything, but when you open it up, it’s got a few surprise bits that should help continue the progress we’ve already made together.” Nancy still seemed crestfallen, and likely seeing it, Nurse Bee sighed. “Look, I’m very sorry, Nancy. I just think things are going to get massively complicated around here very soon if I continue to stay. In fact, my presence might actually hurt you if I’m even remotely correct, so I need to leave for your safety and well-being at minimum,” she explained. “Can you understand that at least?” Nancy still seemed sad over her friend’s departure but still nodded. “It’s tough, but I get that. You’re just trying to protect me…” Nurse Bee nodded back and the two reached and hugged each other. I was still surprised over how quickly they had become friends, but there was a little part of me that still secretly suspected that they were friends for more than just their connection over me. After a moment though, the two disconnected and Nancy wiped a tear away. “I guess this is goodbye then.” Nurse Bee seemed regretful over that notion, but still nodded her head. “It is. At this point, I have to go soon to make it to Losantiville to start work at Juventas immediately, but I’ll be okay.” Nancy seemed happy over that part at least. “Do you think we’ll ever see each other again?” Nurse Bee almost didn’t seem hopeful, but ultimately smiled and placed her hand reassuringly on Nancy’s shoulder. “Of course we will, Nancy. Remember our pact?” Nancy quickly nodded. “Good. If you promise to hold on to that and stay strong, I will too. Got it?” Nancy smiled and then clasped hands, and both shook on their renewed promise together, whatever that was. “Got it. Good luck, Bee.” Nurse Bee gave Nancy one more hug and headed for the door. “You do the same, Nancy. Just remember though, if you ever get in a bind, you can always get ahold of me. If our contingency plan ever comes to it, I know one of the scenarios is a little scary, but we’ll always be there for each other. Just remember that…” her eyes darted to the crate on the couch still. “But also, just remember to open that crate if you ever feel the need. It should be enough for what you really want.” The two hugged it out one more time and Nancy even left the house for a moment to see her off personally. Soon though, I could hear the revving of a car engine outside. Not long after, a still saddened Nancy walked back in and first looked at me and then at the crate. “I guess I better just store this upstairs, huh?” And so, things went uneventfully for the most part at least for a while after that. Nurse Bee still wasn’t replaced in daycare, but Mrs. Gillies just got a local nurse to come out and assist when needed beyond the basic first aid that every staff member was apparently required to know to work there. Still, despite that single shuffle up, things remained mostly the same in my life… including the ‘Tanassum’ box. It lay in my room where Nancy had placed it that first night and while I would occasionally see her stare at it longingly, she never opened it up to see what was inside. Like some sleeping demon waiting at the foot of my bed, it waited. I even had a few nightmares about it, but I just pushed through and hoped things would finally somewhat settle back to normal. Unfortunately for Nancy’s new stance about me, without Nurse Bee pushing her on, her efforts to keep me mentally younger were met with another force at daycare that saw me achieve tremendous strides. Now, I was even running on occasion and finding interest and the ability to actually have fun with some of my old activities there. My colorings after class became more articulate and colorful and I was nearly even able to read, hence why I could read the word ‘Tanassum’ now. If it wasn’t for Nancy’s surely attitude when I came home most nights, I would have almost been happy with my current lot in life. Not perfect, mind you, but certainly better than it had been when Nurse Bee was around. So, things kind of just bubbled along in my life, but all that came crashing down one day when Nancy and I decided to visit the park one Saturday afternoon. The gorgeous summer weather was in full bloom, and though I was seemingly always thirsty, and my diaper was a royal squelching pain half the time in the humid heat, I did enjoy the sunshine and the warmth it provided on my skin. Today, I was visiting with my friends from the daycare while playing in one of the larger sandboxes here near to the playground and open grassy fields. While I was mulling about in my denim skirtalls, complete with a large sunflower on the front of them, Nancy was nearby and occasionally looked up from her book right at me. Her transformation into a new Big woman was nothing short of terrifying and concerning for my future well-being. Now, while I think dressing nicely is wonderful, it didn’t take a genius around here to understand that there are a few types of maternal caregivers around her based on how one looked. There were male ones as well, but I guess after some virus or something like that, they were few and far between, especially on a single level. Regardless, while back on Earth clothing could symbolize anything, here for the carers, one’s clothing almost became a uniform of sorts to denote what type of carer you were. For Nancy, she used to fit into more of the carer category. Nicely dressed, but also seemingly ready to pitch in to help their Little out or play with them whenever. If their makeup smeared or their clothes got dirty for whatever reason, one cleaning cloth later, and they would be back out to do it all over again. Function was typically more important than fashion for them. Now, however, Nancy was now migrating cleanly into the other category… one that tended to sway more towards the pro-Big movement. See, the more fashionable carers were always more concerned with their looks. While there were some exceptions for this category, Littles seemed more like an accessory than a helpless individual to most of them. Additionally, any perceived flaw in their appearance was always met with scorn, so most became a little more hands-off. In truth, I wouldn’t have even been a little surprised if I suddenly found myself with a nanny one of the days. Seeing Nancy’s tall black heels and tight purple short dress combine with her regally done hair and flawless makeup, she now sadly blended right in with the other more fashionable type of carers. “Taller, Emma! Taller!” Lilly commanded me, knocking me out of my own thoughts. Now, ever since I had rejoined the Meadows room and my friends, Lilly had taken on the eldest role in the group. It was a little annoying at some points, but her bossiness was nicely coupled with her genuine warmth and protective spirit… unlike someone like Nancy lately. I rapidly nodded my head and got Anna to help me as well. Since Nurse Bee had left, Anna now seemed like the youngest of the group. It really didn’t matter to either of us, but sometimes I would help her and sometimes she would help me. With sand structures, I usually ended up helping her. “Dank you, Emma,” she said back cheerily to me as we both poured more sand into our buckets to dump on the already impressive looking tower. I smiled back. “Youw we’come, Anna…” I said back, marveling over my newly improved speech. Ever since Omega Force, I was bounding forth in so many ways. My speech had vastly improved over the past few days and instead of being jealous, Anna just celebrated with me. Just as we piled another bucket onto our tower, a ball came hurtling through the air. Someone screamed “Watch out!” but it was too late. The big red rubber ball smacked right into the structure and like some horrific bomb going off, our once pristine and ever-growing castle was soon totaled. “Hey you!” Lilly shouted back to where the voice of warning and red ball had come from. “Weren’t you ever taught manne…” She immediately stopped though when she turned over to face our assailants but froze in fear. I was instantly curious and spun around myself. Unfortunately, what I saw was basically the worst type of assaulters for us Littles: Big children. Now, while Big children and babies were more our size, hence why the Bigs treated us how they did, the Big children were taught from an early age that they were superior to all Littles from the more pro-Big movement type Bigs. It made a certain amount of sense in a terrible, been-here-too-long kind of way, but acceptance like that was just life in this society for any Little. Big children would often, even if they seemed mentally younger than any of us, command and belittle any Littles they came across. Pranks and bullying were common sights from toddler Bigs even to even the most mature of Littles. So now, my friends and I could only gawk in terror as a group of the Big children approached us. It didn’t take me long to spot the bulges in each of their pants, clearly marking them as the younger variety of Big children, but I still braced for the assault I knew would soon follow. As a vulnerable Little with an evolving pro-Big support caregiver, I knew I had to be extra cautious around them. Whatever the truth, I felt certain she would always take their side if it came down to it. “Hey there,” the blonde, a sandy-haired a dimpled Big child said from the front of their group. “Hey,” was about all even Lilly could muster out. From her eyes, I could see the intense amount of fear even the steadfast and more mature Little had right then. He smirked back. “Name’s Dillan. Sorry about your castle, but, uh… like, can we have our ball back?” Lilly now even seemed to be rendered mute, but I could see a spark of kindness in Dillan I often didn’t see in Big children. Feeling on top of the world and eager to get out of the cage I once found myself in, I spoke up instead. “Here ya go!” I then lobbed the ball right over to Dillan’s hands. Despite me being a Little, each of them seemed both impressed and shocked. Dillan was all those things as well, but I could almost see the gears in his head clicking around. “That was… that was a very impressive shot. You ever play ball before?” he asked plainly with a tiny smirk painted over his lips now. I felt it all could be a trap for a Little like me. It wouldn’t be the first time by a long shot after all, but I just felt a sense of truth with his plain-spoken words. So, I nodded. “Yep! Back on Eawth, buh… nah wha’ you awl aw pwayin’ I dink…” Dillan’s group all seemed a little horror-stricken over that notion, but Dillan just kept smiling. “That’s okay. My friends and I picked up pretty quick and we can give you a shot if you want.” I smiled and quickly arose to join him for a little fun. Lilly had other plans though and yanked me back down and whispered angrily to me. “Just what do you think you’re doin’? Don’t’ you know what’s happenin’ with Big children?” I nodded. “I do, buh’ come on. He’s offerin’ an’ I’m goin’.” I could see Lilly wanted to hold me back and was genuinely just looking out for me, but I knew she couldn’t stop me today. So, giving her a little smile, I patted her hand and then soon joined in with Dillan and his friends. Despite my newly reacquired abilities, I was still a Little inside and out. I had the signs all over me, and my speech impediment wasn’t working in my favor. So, it was just inevitable when some of the other Big children on the other team began calling me names. “Hey diaper butt!” Ooh! Did someone go potty yet?” “Baby! Baby!” The names and insults thrown my way weren’t sophisticated and it felt so strange being insulted by a bunch of at least mostly diapered Big children, but that also just made it feel worse. Still, I persisted and once I scored a few goals in the park that day, those insults either turned into silence or even cheers. It was amazing, but I knew I was tempting fate. Lilly would have been right about all of them normally and I could have found myself in a world of hurt, but I also had something I needed to show myself and experience again. I just wanted to feel normal. The diaper hurt that image a bit, but I still ran and felt the wind go through my hair with delight. An hour later, diapers were bulging and soaked, and some had even leaked, but our team had gone on to victory. I was praised by everyone on my team, and I was even now known excitedly as their ‘secret weapon.’ I hadn’t felt this good in a long time, but just as we were making plans to meet next Saturday, I saw a smoldering Nancy on the hill nearby and I knew my luck had run out. Her face was all red and her arms were crossed. I readied myself for the spanking I knew would come tonight, so I just took in the tiny moment of triumph while I still could. I then turned back to Dillan. “Tanks fo’ invitin’ me, Dillan. I gotta go, buh’ it was weally nice.” Dillan smiled. “You’re very welcome, Emma. Be sure to come back anytime. You’ll always have a place on our team here.” I smiled back at him, and we both waved goodbye to each other. I wore that smile with a badge of honor, even when I rejoined the impatient and clearly furious Nancy. I wanted to explain everything to her. I was a good girl, and I hadn’t broken any of her recently implemented numerous rules today, so I thought that just maybe, I could wiggle out of this still. “I…” “Not. Another. Word,” Nancy said plainly but angrily, gritting her teeth and clenching her fists tightly as she did. I could only gulp and wave goodbye to Anna and Lilly who were being looked at by their own caregivers now as well. The big difference with them and my own current situation though was that they were getting fed snacks and being tickled. Possibly a little humiliating as I could just see them start to get their diapers changed on a park bench side by side after, but knowing what likely awaited me at home, I would have taken humiliation over punishment any day of the week. Both could only wave sorrowfully as I was soon buckled into the car and then as Nancy sped off back home. From my stories in daycare, they knew what awaited me. Getting inside our house later, Nancy was silent and dropped my diaper bag in front of the entry way once she had slammed it shut. I tried to plead with her one more time. “No,” she said with an authority and finality that I knew by now not to question or protest. “Upstairs. Now.” Her words were so monotone and cold. There was no sign of feelings or even love. I practically shook the whole time as I trudged into my nursery at the top of the stairs. Further, I even knew to collect the paddle that Nancy had permanently stored in here for a while now. I had named it ‘big sting.’ Nancy thought it was cute, but she now used that name in horrifyingly new ways. Right as I bent over to collect it from underneath my changing table, I felt an immediate smack to my left thigh. It felt like a thousand tiny bee stings and surprised and a little hurt, I spun around and saw Nancy glaring at me with venom in her eyes. I knew I was screwed, but there was a part of me that burned to know why today. “Why you doin’ dis, Nancy? Why?” Nancy’s eyes narrowed and I could almost feel the heat of her angry ripple off her and onto my skin. “Why? Why?” I nodded, knowing full well that a response then of any kind was usually better than nothing. “You were hanging out with older kids, Emma. That’s the problem. You’re just a Little and they were Bigs. You could have gotten hurt or even abused by them. I forbid you from ever seeing them again.” I felt I was already getting the punishment of my life, so I knew what to do by now, but I also wanted to push the envelope just a little bit to try and change her mind about them. Having such a fun day, I didn’t want to accept her ruling over me never seeing them again. “I’m sowwy, Nancy, buh’ dey nah oldah. Dey woe diapuhs… an’ I felt safe… We even won!” Nancy furiously snatched ‘big sting’ out of my hands and quickly popped me on the butt. It didn’t sting this time, but I also knew that it was more for shock value than anything else. “That’s not the point, Emma. I said they’re too old, so they’re too old. Got that?” I should have nodded, but even with all my lessons in how to be a good Little, I had started gaining some of my independent streak back. Unfortunately, it picked right then to rear itself. “Buh’ dey was fine! Iss notta big deal. Dey just babies, wigh? How’s dat wong?” Her fists cracked under her refreshed rage. I was clearly incorrect, and I winced over what I knew was likely coming next. “That’s not the point!” Nancy shot back. She loomed heavily over me and as if to protect myself somehow, I could almost feel my body shrinking as much as possible. “I’m a Big and your caregiver. Whatever I say goes. My word is law, and you will respect that. Do you understand me?” I did, but I just couldn’t let things go. Some things I could tolerate because I didn’t like them, but I also knew they were for my benefit by now. Car seats, highchairs, my diapers, and so many other things were just necessary for Nancy’s ease or to prevent my embarrassment or keep me safe. They were simple to accept if one moved beyond their pure embarrassing symbology, but today wasn’t. I didn’t feel in the wrong today. I played with some friends who could have been a disaster for me but turned out just fine in the end… liberating even. Any normal caregiver who cared in the slightest for their charge could have seen that, and I just couldn’t let that type of notion go. “Iss not faiw! You didn’ use to be dis way… sometimes… I wish I jus’ stayed with Mrs. Tatum…” I said glumly. My words struck true and deep, and I could see them wound Nancy just about as hard as they could. I didn’t want to, but what I said, needed to be said. Nancy was becoming an issue for well-being on multiple levels lately, and I genuinely feared what lay in store for me if I didn’t make a stand at some point. Unfortunately, with my striking words, Nancy’s resolve only seemed to double after a moment. Her saddened face soon changed and morphed into one of pure anger. I was filled instantly with regret, and I barely had time to register anything other than fear as she launched right toward me and started smacking my rear with all her might with ‘big sting.’ It didn’t take long before I was wailing at the top of my lungs. I was thoroughly protected and due to the mush that I had deposited earlier in the rear of my diaper, Nancy hadn’t removed it yet. Each smack echoed off the walls and if it wasn’t for Nancy’s other hand on my shoulder holding me firmly in place, I would have run or at least been hopping in place in tremendous pain. Each strike swatted straight and true and I could feel my mess now suddenly splat against my butt. It was horrible, but what made it truly awful was when Nancy would sometimes aim a little lower and hit my thighs instead. Stinging sensations rippled throughout my lower half, and I lost count of how my spanks I received after 30, but that also wasn’t even halfway through today’s punishment. So, once she stopped, I felt defeated and was a slobbering, blubbering mess. I tried to regain my composure, but each effort just ended in more failure. For her part, Nancy even seemed tired afterward but instead, to my horror, instead of apologizing like she usually did once she was done with my punishment, her eyes scrambled over to the box near my closet. ‘Tanassum’ stood prominently, and my heart sank as I realized that all my worrying was about to become a reality and that whatever was inside was finally going to hit me today. In seconds, she practically ran over to the crate and ripped off the top before peering inside. “Oh wow… you shouldn’t have, Bee…” Her voice almost seemed full of longing and my curiosity of what was inside was poignant but also didn’t last long. “Hmmm… the lighthouse…” Nancy said, holding up a blueish-white cylindrical object that looked very much like its namesake. I’m not sure why, but it instantly filled me with both a deep seeded fear and luxurious calm. As she read the label attached and then looked down into the crate, Nancy almost seemed like a kid on their birthday opening all their presents. Getting a tissue from nearby to at least help with some of my tears, I could only terrifyingly watch as Nancy pulled on a single shot and a tiny vial of some liquid. “Perfect,” she mused looking at the two objects. Frighteningly, she then looked over in my direction and smiled. “Emma, baby. I’ve got something for you… Come here now, or you’ll start tomorrow with a whole series of punishments.” Obediently, and my rear still dirty and stinging, I quickly ran over to her. In moments, she grabbed my arm and injected me without warning. I winced at the pain I soon felt, but an odd and yet somewhat familiar warmth began to spread through my arm. “There,” Nancy said smiling after a moment. “Looks like Nurse Bee is still helping us after all. Now, you should feel nice and sleepy, Emma. When you wake up, and with any luck, I think things are going to be much different.” With that, she put the shot back in the crate and hoisted me up and into my crib. “I think someone has earned an early bedtime tonight.” I whimpered, though fading fast, and then pointed to the current state of my diaper. I could have said something, but I knew that would only make things worse for me at this point. Nancy took my meaning though and grinned wickedly back at me. “Oh that? That’s a You-Ni-Corn diaper, baby cakes. It can take a beating and should last you until tomorrow morning.” Stunned and horrified, but nearly nodding off already, I could only watch as Nancy walked over to my dresser and placed the lighthouse on top. Soon, it emitted an eerie blue glow over the rest of my room. She then went to my door and flipped off the light, further bathing everything in a soft blue hue. If I wasn’t utterly terrified of something from Nurse Bee, I might have been relaxed at that point. “Good night, honey. Somehow, I don’t think you’re going to need the lighthouse tonight, but let’s just see.” And with that, she left my room. Panicking and wanting to escape more than anything, I felt as the warmth from the shot soon began to flow around my brain. Distressingly, everything started to feel simpler and fuzzier. I had felt this way before, and soon after, I entered the Burrows room. I began to softly cry again as I felt that by tomorrow, Nurse Bee would have played her final trick, and I would be back in the Burrows room once again. I hated Nancy being right lately, and today, I felt everything was going exactly her way. I was starting to feel like I was in a no-win scenario, especially as a massive wet fart soon exploded from my backside. It was all terrible and all catching up with me. I wanted to have the hope that I had felt so keenly as I played with Dillan and his friends today but all that had suddenly changed tonight. I had ultimately lost today and as my eyes drifted closed, I just wondered if this time would be my final loss as a soft noise began to float throughout my room from the lighthouse. As the world faded slowly around me into black though, my thoughts became simpler, and sadly, my future only bleaker.

Sorry I haven't answered questions for a while. I've been distracted with some problems. I'll take a stab at them now! I make it to the toilet and most of my urine goes in there. I still wear a pull up in case of leaks but they're not very much. Ha! And I hope he is aggressive 😄 Omg. That would be insane. LOL Hey there, been healing fine and the good thing is I haven't had blockages that need a catheter for several weeks now. It's a really nice feeling to be totally healed. Of course, that won't last too long now since June 1 is getting closer by the day. But now I know that healing does come and it's not so bad at all. Thank you so much for the well wishes. I appreciate it. Well, maybe some day you can go for the surgery too. I never imagined it originally and now, well, here I am. My best to you for an incontinent future somehow. Thank you, I hope it goes well and I'm very optimistic this time around. We'll see soon enough..

I am self-employed and work partly out and about and partly at home. Mondays I am WFH all day except going to the bank in the morning. I love working at the computer or sitting on the sofa in just my nappy and a top/tshirt. Sometimes I have my dummy and bottle too but that's just occasional. I can answer my emails / the phone, do online or paperwork stuff all while nappied and no one knows Anyone else like this? Isn't it great

As must as I hate that Wattpad may do a blanket ban on ABDL content, they need to do something. The sheer amount of underage sexual content on that site is sickening. Also it seems that over 50% of the ABDL content was written by a 5th grader and is unreadable. This why I'm not even bothering to post my current story on that site. I'm mainly writing it for myself anyway and the ABDL community.

Academy II By Mia Moore "At the end of the world, there will be neither clamor nor calamity, neither echo nor epoch. It will be mired in silence and sleep, in deliverance and death. At the end of the world, there will be both patience and purpose, both temperance and time. Only then will it be graced with eternity, and from eternity, a chance." -The Source, in valediction Chapter (Last) One "Why..." Bala sat in the dark. A spotlight clicked on above her, forming a puddle of yellow light beneath her dangling feet. She was sitting in a high chair, with her head down on the tray. When she finally found the energy to sit up, another spotlight clicked on, six or so feet away from her. Ai was standing in the middle of the pool of light. She was naked. So was Bala. Neither of them cared enough anymore to dress themselves. In the indefinable vastness of possibility, clothes were a chore. Their bodies, however, were second nature. First nature, perhaps. "Why?" Bala asked again. "Why can't you leave me alone?" "You're one to talk," Ai said sharply, but her sharpness was that of a toddler's knife. Fragile, plastic, without an edge. Behind them, a wheel turned. An infinite, infinitesimal, contradictory wheel, decorated with time and fate. "Just stop it," Bala begged. Tears filled her eyes. Big, wet, floaty tears. They fell away from her without gravity, like a spilled canteen on a spacecraft. No, Ai thought. Because that was what she always said. That was how she always felt. But this time, the word was too heavy. She had pushed that word - "no" - up the hill so many times, for it to tumble back down. As she tried to shove the word out of her mouth, she was too weak to move it a single inch. "Whatever," Ai said instead. She sat down in the darkness and held her head in her hands. Behind her, a wheel turned. The two of them were each quiet for a moment, because they both knew that it didn't matter what they said. They were like oil and water, like the sun and the moon, like politicians across the aisle: understanding, empathy, and common ground were impossible goals. Ai and Bala were mutually exclusive, and both of them knew it. That fact was, perhaps, the only thing they'd ever agreed upon. "Out of all the places I've been, this is the worst." Ai finally mumbled, after a time that could have been a moment, a while, or forever. "Alone, in a room, with you?" Bala asked rhetorically. "Agreed." It seemed even the universe was tired of the two of them, and now they were in time out. A fitting punishment. As they waited in silence, an image flickered above them, grainy and jittery like an old overhead project from an elementary school on a low budget. It showed Ai, and it showed Bala; as children, as friends. A screenshot of a reality that never existed, and for the two of them, never could. Bala looked up and watched the image melt into another, like a movie playing in the sky. Two little girls, ignorant of the complexity of the universe. Two little girls, playing in the din of inconsequence. Two little girls, purposeless. Two little girls, happy. "I tried to make this happen so many times," Bala said. She had no reason to talk to Ai. So she went on, to herself. "I tried to make us friends. I tried to make a world where there were no repercussions for anything." "A world where I didn't exist," Ai added. "A world where you didn't exist. A world where neither of us could remember anything." "A world frozen in time," Bala continued. "A world made up of nothing but emotions." "A world with big people and small people," Ai remembered. "A world where we were all specks of light." "A world of different worlds. Where everyone could have their own world." "A world where we were characters in a story. Remember that?" "I ran out of ideas, and I had to break the pattern," Bala sighed. "I still don't know how you got out of that one." Ai didn't answer. "I liked the world with all the map puzzles," Ai said. "You solved them faster than I could make them." Silence. "I liked the one with the pet people," Bala said. "Yeah, I was… a puppy girl or something?" Bala didn't answer. "I don't know what to do," Bala confessed. It was baffling to hear the will of God admit to such a mortal failing. "Trying to make sense of you is like trying to catch a deluge in a paper cup." It was silent. No time passed, because time did not exist. Behind them, a wheel turned. "Do you know why I'm strong enough to be here?" Ai finally asked. "Do you know why I can fight you like this?" "I know everything," Bala sighed, like everything was the worst thing to know. "That woman from the Academy--" The Academy. Those two words brought back a surge of nostalgia to the both of them. It was like hearing a nickname you were called as a child, a nickname you didn't particularly like. The movie above them flickered to disparate, inconsequential scenes from their pasts, interlaced in an order unorthodox. It was lifetimes ago, but Ai remembered. "Maria, she..." "Betrayed the Academy," Bala finished. Ai shook her head. Maybe Maria did betray the Academy, but she did more than that. She betrayed herself. Ai looked up at Bala, sitting naked in the high chair. And though she thought nothing of her own nudity, Bala looked incomplete. Had she always looked that way? When Bala looked down at herself, she was suddenly wearing a onesie with little angel wings and halos printed on it. Underneath it, the familiar feeling of a diaper. Bala looked up at Ai, sitting naked in the pool of yellow light. She had more thoughts in a single moment than all of consciousness through all of time, but it wasn't enough. A diaper and a onesie was not a malicious outfit, and nothing explained why Ai would afford her any kindness at all. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I hate you," Bala said flatly. "I know," Ai sighed. "You betrayed me," Bala said, and fresh tears floated around her head. The movie above them flickered to one scene in particular, when their stories overlapped. The moment when Bala was sent back to the Cold Room, and Ai was given all the answers she could ever want. "I know..." Ai watched the low-quality film reel. That moment was so long ago, and it was only a moment ago. Ai knew, even then, that she had made a mistake. Throughout every universe, every battleground, Ai justified her actions with a single doctrine: next time, she could do better. That moment with Bala didn't define her, no more than the thousands of mistakes before it or the million mistakes after. In time, she would learn. She would grow. She would change. But as she watched that movie, she realized... she hadn't changed at all. Maria betrayed herself and the institution she worked hard to build, all so that Ai could have some autonomy in the new world. And what did Ai do with it? She fought for countless lifetimes to be the same person she had always been. The same woman who walked away from Bala all those lifetimes ago. For the first time in infinity, Ai understood why Bala was doing what she was doing. Because it wasn't enough to trust in humanity's desire to grow. Change was hard. Change was long. And for so many people, they never bothered to start. Ai never bothered to start. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I'm sorry," Ai said. Big, wet, floaty tears filled her eyes. "I should never have treated you that way. I should never have acted like my needs were more important than yours." For a time - although time was nonexistent and incalculable now - Bala was quiet and still. Frozen in thought. A thousand universes could have been born and a thousand and one could have died in the moment that it took her to form words. "You're right. You shouldn't have treated me that way. You shouldn't have acted that way. You shouldn't have. But you did. And now look where we are." Bala remembered a thought she had a long time ago, at the end of one of her stories, and a thought she kept close to her throughout the incalculable iterations of the universe. "This is all your fault," Bala spat at her, eyes wet with tears. "I know..." Ai rubbed her eyes. She didn't want to cry in front of Bala. She didn't want to show weakness. But something about the space she was in, or something about her realization, was too much to mask. Tears dripped away from her cheeks, forming globules of glittering water that drifted around her head like planets around a star. For a while, in relative terms, Bala and Ai cried. Above them, the movie of childhood friends - the impossible universe left unmade - flickered onto the screen. The two little girls cried together, on opposite ends of a front stoop. They held themselves instead of each other. Ai racked her brain for some way to make it up to Bala, but it wasn't possible. She couldn't make up for millennia of suffering. She could never atone for bringing sin into Bala's worlds. All at once, her resolve began to crumble. Could she ever really change? At this point, would it even matter? Ai wanted to sink into her old ways. She wanted to slip into self-pity or self-hatred, old clothes she never had the time to wear anymore. She wanted it to be easy. Finally, Ai and Bala were on the same page. There was no reason to fight. If she let Bala have her way, all her sins would be erased. She could start over again, as someone perfect. She never had to know the feeling of wanting to be more than she was. Of not being enough. But Ai's catharsis lasted only a fraction of never. Ai looked up at Bala, crying in the high chair. Overhead, a new movie was playing. Moments of Bala, through her childhood. Through her job as a nurse. Through the Academy. Through universes, like pages of a flip book that didn't tell a story. But Ai knew the story. She'd known it for a long time. Ai remembered a memory of a memory. Behind her, a wheel turned. Ai slowly got to her feet, wiping the tears out of her eyes and splashing them into the ring around her head. It was a solid circle now, glittering in the spotlight. But it vanished along with Ai when she stepped out of the pool and into the darkness. Alone with an empty spotlight, Bala cried. She cried, because she couldn't do it right. And she knew, deep down, Ai wasn't the reason her universes kept failing. The truth was, Bala just wasn't good enough. Then Ai appeared in front of her, in her spotlight, and touched the tray table of her high chair. It evaporated into glitter. Bala looked up at Ai, and before confusion could wash over her face, Ai wrapped her arms around the crying girl. Above them, in the movie, one girl had moved to the other side of the stoop and hugged the other. "Shh..." Ai whispered. "It's okay. It's okay." "It's not." That was Bala's first thought, her first response, her knee-jerk reaction in the form of words, as instinctual as pulling away from a flame. Not an answer from her brain, but from her lips. How could things ever be okay again? There was nothing left but the two of them, and for anything else to exist, it was predicated entirely on Bala's will for it to be. How could she ever will someone to be part of her constant, unending failure? The truth was – to Bala, in her nothing – Ai meant everything to her. Ai was the only thing she couldn't control. Bala sobbed. Each tear had enough energy to birth a billion realities. Each heaving, choking, ugly cry took away so much potential that even entropy itself ceased to exist. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I'm lost… I've lost…" "You didn't lose anything," Ai said warmly, holding Bala tight to her chest. "They gave you an impossible task. To make a world where everyone is supposed to be happy? To make something perfect? It's not possible." "It is," Bala argued, because it had to be possible. Because otherwise, she never had a chance to succeed in the first place. And all this was for nothing. "It's not," Ai said again, softer. "It's not possible to be perfect. Nothing is perfect. Nobody is perfect. You... you can't be perfect." "I have to be perfect," Bala tried, sobbing into Ai's chest. She clung tightly to Ai's white dress, hand-embroidered with little flowers. She wanted to cling to a dress. She wanted Ai to be wearing it. And so she was. "No, Bala. You don't have to be anything. Not perfect. Not a baby. Not an adult, either. Not a god, or a nurse. And certainly not this. You don't have to be anything you don't want to be." But only one thing came to mind when Bala thought about what she wanted to be: "I want to be a good girl..." she cried. Ai knew how Bala felt, because Ai too wanted to be a good girl. Every girl wanted to be a good girl, and every boy wanted to be a good boy, and everyone wanted to be a good person. Because a drive for goodness was not the product of the Academy, but the product of humanity. A long time ago, something came into existence, and that thing was one thing. Be it consciousness or God, that was all there ever was. Then, something happened, and there was something else. This dichotomy led to discussion, debate, protest, argument, and war. Right versus wrong. Good versus bad. But at the root, good has always been nothing more than the thing you want to move toward, and bad has always been the thing you want to move away from. The difference may be subjective, but the purpose is clear: movement. At the end of a million worlds, with millennia of experiences behind you, it's not hard to see the truth. In that moment, it wasn't hard for Ai, and it wasn't that much harder for Bala either. Behind them, a wheel turned. "You're a good girl," Ai said, hugging Bala even tighter. "You're good, because you try to be better. That's all it takes." With each passing universe she created, Bala measured goodness by the starting point. She had to optimize the rules, not to allow for betterment, but to encourage stagnation, because the only way to go was down. If what Ai was suggesting was true, and it was movement that mattered, then Bala had created worlds without "good". How could she be a good girl in a goodless world? All this time, Bala had been thinking that, if only Ai would stop interfering, she could find the right answer. She could create the perfect world. But if Ai wasn't there to foil all her plans, would she ever be happy? Could she? The truth was, a long time ago, Bala had given up on ever finding happiness. That was why her mission was so important: it was her last chance to do something right. For the first time in time's nonexistence, Bala was at a loss. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I have to figure it out," Bala mumbled under her breath. "I… I gotta…"

 "And then what?" Ai asked. She broke her hug, but she kept the soft tones. "You'll always worry about it. Always think that you're doing something wrong. It's not fair to you, Bala. Everyone isn't your responsibility."

 Bala shook her head quickly.

 "You're just… trying to trick me. That's all you do, is trick me and hurt me."

 Ai hesitated. Was Bala wrong? Had Ai ever done anything for Bala, or in Bala's interests? She couldn't remember a single time, in all the universes they had shared together.

 "Listen…" Ai said quietly, taking Bala's hands in hers. "I know you don't have any reason to trust me. I know I probably shouldn't trust you, either. But you're not a villain. And neither am I. And, I'm starting to think… we aren't even the heroes. We're just people."

 Bala looked up into Ai's eyes, still blurry with tears. She had to be the hero. She had to be the martyr. She had to die on the cross, to save everyone else. She didn't have to be happy about it. Good and happy… she couldn't be both.

 "I have to…" Bala muttered.

 "I don't think so," Ai said simply. "But, I'm done assuming everything I think is right. So, if you really want to, then… make a new world. Try again. I won't stop you this time."

 Bala stared blankly, as if in all the impossibilities the multiverse had to offer, this was the least likely.

 "I don't believe you…" Bala said.

 "Well, I can try my best," Ai answered, because she figured it was about time she believed in someone other than herself. For better or for worse, Ai wouldn't make the same mistakes. There are two important facts about faith that worked in Ai's favor at that moment. The first: you have to be entirely without evidence to have faith, which was perfect for Ai and Bala, who had no evidence that either of them was worth trusting. The second: you're more likely to put your faith in something when you're desperate, and Bala was very desperate. Behind them, a wheel turned. "…what kind of world should I make…?" Bala asked. At first, Ai thought her question was rhetorical, like someone asking themself "what to wear…" in the morning. But, like an unanswered instant message, Bala seemed to be waiting for Ai to take her off Read. "Are you asking me?" Bala nodded sheepishly. Ai had absolutely no idea. She had spent the better part of existence in reboot universes. She'd seen everything there was to see. She knew how every single outcome of every single variable would play out. And so did Bala. But there was one pervasive feature that always seemed to come up, and Ai's curiosity once again got the best of her. "Do you actually like all this baby stuff?" Ai asked awkwardly. She quickly added: "No judgment." "I... I'm not sure," Bala admitted, looking up at the two children talking on the stoop. "I just don't want to have any more responsibility..." In a way, Bala was the caregiver to every soul in the universe. But before that - before the Academy - Bala liked having responsibilities. She liked feeling needed and valuable. She liked doing the right thing, even if it meant sometimes doing the wrong thing. Maybe she didn't even want to be a baby at all. She just didn't want to be a mom. Ai and Bala were quiet for a while, as each tried to think of the right answer to an unanswerable question. What ending would be satisfactory? What was a good conclusion, after such an impossible, incoherent series of events? How could either of them hope to make everyone happy? "What about that?" a voice said. Not Ai's voice, and not Bala's, but the voice of God herself. Ayoka Kanoska stood a few feet away, dressed in something impossible. She was pointing up at the sky, where a movie was playing. The two little girls weren't on the stoop anymore; they were playing hop-scotch with sidewalk chalk. Whatever turmoil had them crying just before… it was gone now. Behind Aya, a wheel turned. "It's not possible," Bala sighed. She'd spent so many eternities with Aya that even her sudden presence wasn't a surprise anymore. Her hopeless optimism, her unflinching generosity, her unbearable kindness. And what had Bala done with it? Mutated her. Abused her. Took her for granted. More tears spilled from her eyes and began to orbit around her head. "It's okay," Aya said warmly, resting a hand on Bala's back and kissing her temple. Ai took an awkward step backward, and the spotlight around them grew to accommodate. "How can you say that? Don't you have any self-respect?" Bala shouted. But her voice was no louder than a hatpin hitting the carpet. And Aya's voice was full of every star in the universe. She was true power, and Bala was as fragile as the human will. "We chose this together," Aya said simply. "We've sacrificed everything, you and I. I don't regret it." "How can you not?" Bala laughed, rubbing tears out of her eyes. In that moment, all three of them knew the same truth of Bala: that when Maria gave her that gun, she wished now that it had killed her. Behind her, a wheel turned. Aya took Bala by the hand and helped her to her feet. The high chair was gone, as if it was never there to begin with. Then Aya wrapped her arms around Bala in a hug. For no good reason other than there was no good reason not to, Ai stepped forward and joined in. "I don't regret it," Aya said again, "because I would rather be here with the two of you than nowhere at all." That hug lasted forever. It still goes on, to this day. It transcends space and time and everything known and unknown in the universe, and it has nothing to do with Aya or her power. It lasted forever because hugs between friends always do. In front of them, a wheel turned. "What about that?" Aya said again, pointing up at the sky where a movie was playing. The two little girls were still playing hopscotch. The little girl next door came over to play with them. "It's not possible," Bala said again. "I've tried." Ai watched the three of them jumping from one square to the next, taking turns. One and two and three four and… she fell. The little Indian girl, with dark hair and wet eyes. She looked up at the other two in a panic. Afraid of… something. But they each took a hand and helped her up. She tried again. "No…" Ai said quietly. She finally understood what Aya was saying. "Not a world where we all get along, or a world where we can be friends. But that world." Ai pointed up at the sky where a movie was playing. "That's… no way." Bala shook her head in a panic. "I have hundreds of requests! I promised I'd do it right, I promised, and they're gone now, so I have to–" "You don't have to," Ai reminded her. She took Bala's hand. "You can always say no, and you can always change your mind," Aya said. She took Bala's other hand. Once upon a time, Bala Khatri would do anything to honor someone's choices, even if it went against her values or beliefs. Now, she was asked to do that again: to honor her own right to choose, even though it went against her values and beliefs. In front of her, a wheel turned. "We don't know anything about that universe," Bala muttered. "It could be a horrible world. Death and famine and hatred… if I could take a look, tweak it…" "You'd never stop," Ai said with a sad smile. "I've seen you do it," Aya concurred. Bala watched the movie in the sky, as the child that could be her readied herself to once again hopscotch across the sidewalk. Her friends on the sidelines cheered her on. "She doesn't even know…" Bala said, with fresh tears floating down her cheeks and collecting in a circle above her head. "That girl, she doesn't know what I am. What we are. What we've done…" "We don't have to be this," Aya reminded Bala and Ai both. Then she gestured at the movie playing overhead. "We can be that, if we want to." "And what? Forget everything? Pretend we're not the creators of this universe?" "It's not pretending," Ai said to herself, working through everything she had learned. Everything Maria did, everything she failed to do. Then she said: "We can just choose to be different. We always could have." Bala was at a loss for words. Ai and Aya were proposing ego death, to cease to be. To willingly give up parts of who they were, for a chance at being something different. To… change. At the heart of it, that's how change works. A part of you has to die for another part to live and grow. That's why change is so scary. That's why nobody ever wants to do it. Not until it's too late, and things are too terrible. Nobody ever changes… until they can't stand not to. "I don't want to be in charge of everyone…" Bala finally said. "I don't want to have all this power," Aya added. "I don't want to keep fighting all the time," Ai finished. All three of them looked up at the movie and watched it together. They stared at it for so long that they started to believe the girls in the spotlight were a dream, and the girls in the grainy, low-budget movie were real life. In front of them, a wheel turned. Eventually, Aya looked at Bala. Eventually, Ai looked at Bala. Eventually, Bala looked at the floor. With enough time, no wall can stay up forever, not even the bonds that hold together the human soul. All three of them were on the same wavelength, and all knew what was coming next. Bala slowly nodded. It was time for this to end. But then she said: "I want to check on something first." "No," Ai and Aya both said in unison. "One thing," Bala begged. "One thing, I promise. And… in return, you can each check on something too." Ai and Aya both looked at each other. Three rules. Three rules, and everything else was left up to chance. "What do you want to look into?" Ai asked. "If the Academy exists," Bala said simply, "because I don't want it to." Everyone agreed. No one should have power over another's fate. Ai was next. She could have anything in the new world. She could be rich, or she could be powerful. She could have her fiancé back, but she'd had thousands of fiancés. Thousands of life partners. And each one was as special and important as the last. In the new world, whoever she found, she knew they would be exactly what she needed. So Ai thought of something else. "I want everyone to always have the opportunity to grow, no matter what happens." "Are you sure?" Bala asked skeptically. She had known Ai for a long time, longer than anyone knows anything, and Ai's request felt out of character. So she challenged it: "Even Maria Porter?" Ai sighed. She didn't like to think about Maria, because she couldn't help but think the worst of her. But the woman who came into the Memoriam and apologized, that wasn't the Maria that Ai knew. Whatever happened to her, whatever made her change… it was nothing short of a miracle. Ai wanted a world where miracles could happen. "Yeah, sure," Ai shrugged. "She deserves a chance to be happy." "That's very gracious of you," Aya smiled. "Hey, I'm not actually a demon!" "No, you're an angel," Aya said, and tapped the halo of tears circling around Ai's head. Ai blushed. Bala reached above her own head and smiled to herself. All that crying, all that emotion, had formed a halo. Maybe she had been a good girl after all. "What about you?" Ai asked Aya. "Last one." "Hm…" Aya put her finger to her chin in thought. In every universe, she always had exactly what she wanted, even when what she wanted wasn't good for her. She had power beyond even her own comprehension. But power wasn't enough. Even the Source knew it: one person alone couldn't reset the world. It had to be two. It had to be together. Aya looked at Bala, her connection to humanity. Her chariot, pulling the sun across the sky. While Aya sat at the lead, Bala did the work. She was the guide, like Virgil through the afterlife, writer of myth and creation. Aya looked at Ai, her connection to reality. Her magician, a polymorph spell, a serpent in defense of fate at Delphi. While Aya was young and naive, Ai followed her instincts. She was the challenger, full of mistakes and questions as juicy as apples. Never once did Aya see evil in either of those two girls. Perhaps because there was never any evil to begin with, or perhaps because Aya couldn't find any within herself. In her soul, there were no shadows; it was full of fire, of destruction and light. But Aya chose to never nock an arrow. She never found evil beyond redemption, and that was a choice anyone could make. "No matter how powerful any one person gets," Aya decided, "I want the world to be everyone's responsibility." The rules were set, the choices made. Three girls, three wishes, and the dawn of something new. A place where they could be less of what they had to be, and more of what they wanted to be. A place where I get to put down this pen and do the same. They got three rules; I get three more sentences. With nothing left to do and no time left to do it, God hugged her angels goodbye and hello. In a dark room, lit by a single spotlight and the glow of an old movie, the world came to an end for the last time. But that hug will last forever. [End.]

First and foremost, I want to thank @Sophie ♥, @Pudding, @Personalias, @bigred0603, @Lyra Silver, @PeculiarChangeling, and @bbykimmy for their installations in Academy II. When I decided to write seven different worlds for the finale, I admit, I found the task incredibly daunting. And when it was suggested to me that I should instead let seven other authors write those worlds, I admit, I found that to be even more daunting. I am so used to being in control of everything in my life, lending out something as important as Academy Works - especially for the finale! - felt so dangerous. But they brought the worlds to life in ways I never could have. They created their own art within my art, and I will be forever grateful to have worked with such incredible writers and such incredible people. I believe that Academy Works is stronger for their involvement, and I believe it will make this next chapter all the more powerful. Secondly, I want to thank everyone who has been reading this series. When I started writing Academy Works, I wanted to prove to everyone that I was good at something. That I could write some kind of huge epic baby smut story that had something for everybody. Something people would want to show their friends, something they would be inspired by. I wanted to go down in history as one of the great ABDL authors, just like all the people who worked on A:2 with me. Just like Ai, I wanted to find my purpose. But now that it's ending, I realize that I don't care what happens next. If my story ends up forgotten along with all the others on this website, if nobody ever talks about it again, that would be okay. Because writing Academy Works has taught me so much. It's given me so much. Wonderful friendships. Camaraderie with other writers in my field. A readership that thinks and cares and speculates and treats my words like they are important. A sense of competence. Academy Works is also the reason my girlfriend and I are together. So... to everyone who read this series, and especially to those who have left comments, thank you so much for showing me that the journey is more invaluable than any destination. Anyway... The end of Academy Works has always been in the back of my mind. I imagined a world after countless worlds, where everyone was too tired to keep on going. Where they had to stop and think for once. To talk. To connect. For those who have played Xenogears, I took a lot of inspiration from the second disk. But I didn't know how it would truly end until I started writing it. Until I read all of the A:2 stories from the authors listed above. I saw the puzzle come together and the pieces fall in place. And I ended up with... this. I hope this is good enough. I'm terrified that maybe people will read the ending and hate it. How am I supposed to wrap up everything at this point? How can I possibly make everyone happy? Well... I guess I can't. I'm not perfect. But I hope I'm perfect enough for all of my fans. Once more, in valediction... thank you all so much. ~Mia Moore~

You’re a realist. Not me, I’m convinced there’s a gorgeous, bed-wetting, nymphomaniac in my future. Just have to keep my eyes open.

Well, yes. I'd like to thank both of you for your company and support along the way. I was going that way anyway, I'm sure, but it's made a big difference to know I wasn't doing it on my own, and that there were the two of you with a similar approach and family situation doing pretty much the same. It's now 5 1/2 years since I went full-time during the day, and 4 years since I went into nappies full-time at night as well. I still just love it, and I can't believe I've never regretted it for a minute.

I completely agree with BP on his very accurate quote, I understand how much work goes into writing stories/books and I don’t think that you should not be paid if the story is worth paying for, but a teaser or basically a advertisement for free is in bad taste, I actually have no idea how much money this type of thing would generate but I think at bare minimum you should consider a contribution to the site. Or the occasional free complete short story.

No offense, but I think if you want to do something like this, you should be consulting with the forum mods and getting an advertising type forum added. This forum has always been about stories written for the general members to be able to see. Yes some authors have subscription platforms where chaprmtes are posted before they become free, but people are not trying to post teasers to sell their e books