Is having to wear a diaper really that embarrassing for most adults?

[Enthusi]

I’ve been reflecting on this a lot recently.     Similar to so many others who frequent this forum, with my incontinence desires being what they are, and with me being so used to being diaper dependent, it’s difficult to maintain perspective.  It’s like that little voice that tells me it’s not normal for me as a healthy(ish) active typically developing man to uncontrollably urinate himself without any warning day and night has been muted.  I don’t care if someone sees my  diaper poking out. They’re my underwear and I treat them as such  

And yet every now and then something happens that makes me realize that having to wear diapers is this horrible thing.  Examples include:

1. A former coworker lamenting that her husband has prostate cancer but he doesn’t want surgery because he doesn’t want to to have to “piss in a diaper.” 
 

2. Reading about how during New Year’s Eve in Times Square there’s no bathroom access for 8+ hours and so some people resort to wearing adult diapers.  People ask me questions like what to do with the diaper once they peed in it. As if it has to be changed the minute it gets wet.  And the way the articles write about this option makes it clear it’s not for the faint of heart.  
 

3. I recently stumbled upon a would you rather question prompt that asked if you would rather always feel like have to pee, or wear a diaper and have never feel like you need to pee.   I still don’t know the answer to this but the fact that they even had to ask tells me it’s not a a no-brainer.  

I feel like I’m missing something about how undesirable diapers are for most adults. 

[~Brian~]

@Enthusi

I think most adults would agree that diapers may be undesirable to them because of the fact that that indicates that they have no control over what is going on with their bladder or bowels. remember when you are a baby, you had no control over your bladder or bowels either, and people used to be able to change diapers All the time for you. when you are an adult, that is one of the most important things that you actually can still do for the time for the time you are old enough to train, and you pass your training, you probably will never have to wear diapers again, and less of course there are mitigating circumstances where you must wear diapers because of a medical condition or because of a disability that is causing problems with your bladder her bowels or because you are mobility limited.

There could also be other things that are at the root of this. By the router this I mean that all our lives were told the diapers are bad, are diapers are for babies, or diapers are for those that don't have any control, or those that are elderly. If someone wears diapers and their older, then somebody may automatically put two and two together and assume that the person has no to little control, And then the person wearing diapers laments it because of the fact it means that they don't have the control they once did, and they also lose a little bit of their confidence because they feel bad because they can't control what they used to. As we get older, we lose some of our abilities to do things, and one of them is, unfortunately the ability to use the bathroom independently. Adults that are elderly despise this because they don't have the ability to use the bathroom independently, and they don't want anyone else knowing this very intimate private thing that they could handle a long time ago, but now may need help doing. It's a normal part of life that people may not like the fact that they have to wear diapers, or Because of the way they were raised they feel that diapers are bad, they're disgusting, and they and they remember that they may have to use the diapers, and what it feels like to actually use them.

People that are incontinent use them everyday because they have no choice. Diapers are like their underwear and they are underwear for that individual. The problem is is there are people around that feel that it is bad for anyone for anyone other than babies or people that are disabled or elderly to wear diapers. There are many individuals that wear diapers because of their need to wear diapers, because of medical condition, and other things that we've already discussed. there is even people that wear diapers for comfort reasons and that is considered in my mind to be also medical because sometimes it could be mental physical emotional or psychological as a reason that you wear diapers. Autistic people also have reason to wear diapers as well, because for example they may find that they are dealing with tactile sensations or the way it feels, and it makes them feel better, or helps them to function better and, and that is also good.

As you stated, people wear diapers for many different reasons, and most of the time when you're talking about diapers if you're used to it, it is not the worst thing in the world, because diapers help you. What you have to do is change your mindset from something that is about it, and find a positive place to place in the negative position. basically what I'm saying is you take something that's negative and you try to make a positive out of it, and you try to look to the good side, because there's always advantageous reasons for wearing diapers, to go with all the negative reasons for wearing diapers, and you try to remember that they help you in many ways. if you can think of it that way, you've already beaten your odds because most people think all the negative things about wearing diapers, they think of all the bad things that could possibly happen, or all the people that they think are going to think negatively or different about them, And those are legitimate fears, but I can tell you from example and from experience that I've asked several of my friends if they feel any different or would feel different about me, or have a differing opinion of me if I had to wear diapers. the overwhelming majority of the people I've asked say that it is a part of life and it is something that is normal, and it's nothing to be ashamed of or worried about, but it happens. everybody that I've talked to has a positive outlook about it, and they tell me not to worry about it. my main concern is that I'm sick and tired of having to fight my body, and have to run to the bathroom all the time because I'm constantly on the move. wearing diapers makes it so much easier, and there are advantages to wearing diapers. you just have to find those advantages, and you have to use those advantages to your advantage. those people in Times Square for example: how many times did they go somewhere and then they have to determine where the next bathroom is? probably one in 10, While the other 8 are in the bathroom comet, too wide of those 10 can use their diapers at least three times if they have to go number one, and then when they have to use the restroom, they just change their diaper. You have to also realize that if you are incontinent you find ways to make things easier for yourself, and you find ways to be able to use public spaces to your advantage so that you can enjoy time with your friends or family. Many times people or diapers because of the fact that they can't get to the bathroom on time, or because of the fact that it takes them so long to get there, or that you're on long drives. there always is an advantage for every disadvantage for wearing diapers Period of course if you mesh your diaper, if you're not used to it, it's going to stink and it's going to feel weird and it's Going to burn or itch. The advantage to that is at least you don't have to worry if you have the diaper on. the worst thing that can happen is if you had to use the bathroom and you didn't have a diaper on and you ended up messing yourself. You still have to clean up the mess, but at least your diaper helped you because it contained the mess within whatever you're wearing.

Wearing diapers is no big deal: it's just the people around us that meet wearing diapers the big deal, or make it sound like it's the worst thing that can possibly happen in the world! that is a bunch of Hoo Hang, because Wearing diapers is not bad: yes you have to get used to having a little extra bulk, yes you have to worry about peeing yourself or leaking, yes you have to worry about messing yourself or stinking up the place, but once you get used to wearing diapers it's like riding a bicycle, or using an ipad or an apple watch, or something like that. once you learn it you'll never forget it. once you get used to it it's not a big deal, and there are many many individuals here on daily diapers that can actually tell you that this is an accurate statement. The problem is we have to kill these stigmas and bury them below 10 tons of cement! People do not need to feel bad because they wear diapers, and they don't have to be made to be embarrassed or made fun of because they decide to wear diapers: it's as normal as me putting on a pair of socks everyday, or me charging my wheelchair before I go to work every morning. it's something you do without even thinking about it, because the minute you don't think about it, it's normal and it just happens, and then it's like autonomic response: you don't have to think about breathing, you don't have to think about your heart beating or anything like that. when you're wearing a diaper, and you make a mesh, you might feel it you might smell it, and then you take care of it. You put another diaper on after you clean yourself up, and that's the way it is. when you're incontinent that happens every day 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year, with no breaks no holidays or no changes. you wear diapers every day, that's the way it goes! you don't get to decide when you're gonna wear diapers and you don't get to decide when you're not gonna wear diapers! you wear diapers because you need them, or because you want to wear them, or you need to wear them for emotional or other reasons: the reason for wearing diapers whether they be medical psychological or emotional or comfort or whatever, is the same thing: you need your diapers, and that is a fact!

@Enthusi in my opinion you are not missing anything:  there will always be people who think wearing diapers is undesirable, or that it is bad for them. Part of the problem is, As you get older, you may not have the choice, and that is OK because your body has to still do the same functions it did when you were three years old as I do if you're say 90 years old, it's just gonna take you longer to do some things, or you may lose some function, and one of the worst things that can happen to the elderly is their loss of bladder or bowel control, So they feel like they can't or shouldn't be seen wearing diapers because it's embarrassing. You're not missing a thing You've hit it on the nose: the reason why people that are elderly do not like to wear diapers is because it is embarrassing or because it is something that somebody else will know about, and they don't want that information made public. I can understand why people don't want that information disclosed, because that is their private intimate business, And even though we do our business every day, we don't have to tell everybody what we did or how we did it, but when you're wearing diapers, you may have to have help to change yourself, or to take care of yourself, so that means more people are involved in the day to day operations or the day to day ADLS or activities of daily living that you do. the more people that are involved in day-to-day ADLS, the less ability a person may have to be able to do those ADLS for example, from time to time I will help my roommate when he has a accident, I will go right in there, and I will help him clean it out, or I will help him by cleaning the floor, or do something else, if it gets out of hand, I make a phone call and I can get someone in here in 45 minutes to help him at least. We have a system between him and I to be able to do these things, so it's not a big deal. When you lose the ability to do things that you used to do, it can be very traumatizing for the individual that is involved in this situation, and that is part of the reason why some people May despise wearing diapers because that because that indicates they do not have any control of what is going on with their bladder or bowels, and they may think that if they lose control of their bladder or bowels, they may lose control of other things like being able to make decisions And, and if that happens, well it can make things go downhill Awful fast if you know what I mean! most times if you work with individuals, you can allay their fears and make them understand that you're there to help them, and as much as they can they still make decisions, but as you age that may change as you get older. I think some elderly individuals sometimes think that if they can't control their blood or bowels, it just means they're not able to control other things, and then they feel like their failure: There are many individuals who wear diapers every day, and what needs to happen is people need to realize that this is a normal part of life: you're not expected to be continent when you're 100 years old, and you're not expected to be continent at two years old either, so there is a double edged sword in each situation. You're darned if you do, and you're darned if you don't. People think that you're supposed to know how to use the bathroom by a certain age, and you're not supposed to wear diapers after a certain age, and then as you age it's expected that you may wear diapers again, because we start life in diapers, so most likely we will end our life in diapers, but not always.

 Thank you for a very interesting post as usual!

Brian

 

[Alyeskabird]

Sadly, the short answer is yes, a lot of adults would be embarased to wear a diaper. Heck, thats even a thing for some diaper lovers, they want to feel embarrased.

Longer answer is, still yes, but there are reasons. Literaly from when people are a baby, they are constantly hounded and bombarded with things to make diapers unwelcome and demonized. The whole only babys wear diapers. You don't want to be a baby do you? Grow up and stop acting like a baby. Diapers are only for babys, your not a baby are you? Grown ups don't wet the bed, you don't want people to think your a baby do you? I am quite sure that most everyone can pull out all sorts of things that show exactly that thing. By the time most people are adults they have been well indoctrinated in the idea that diapers are only for babys and you don't want to be a baby, period. 

There is a lot of pressure put on children not to wear diapers, a lot of shaming and worse. That tends to stick around for life, its why most adults are so against diapers. ALso partly why diapers and abdl is paired with pedo shit. People think diaper = baby.  I really really wish that perents would not push that so hard on there children, I would have been a lot happyer growing up, if when I was wetting the bed, I could wear diapers. Instead it was, as was common back then I expect, spankings and getting yelled at.

Sadly a lot of that stuff persists to later in life, and a lot of adults still have that fear of being seen as a baby, the shaming of having your classmates laugh at you and worse. Never mind the beatings that would be included with that sorta thing. Bullys are allways looking for people that are social outcasts, safer for them to bully after all.

Sorry thats probably a lot to drop, but, it is a part of what happens. True, things have been changing, there is a lot less push to potty train as early as physicly posable. That does reduse the stigmata that is put on diapers, but, it will take time for attitudes to change.

[Cute_Kitten]

2 hours ago, Alyeskabird said:

 

Longer answer is, still yes, but there are reasons. Literaly from when people are a baby, they are constantly hounded and bombarded with things to make diapers unwelcome and demonized. The whole only babys wear diapers. You don't want to be a baby do you? Grow up and stop acting like a baby. Diapers are only for babys, your not a baby are you? Grown ups don't wet the bed, you don't want people to think your a baby do you? I am quite sure that most everyone can pull out all sorts of things that show exactly that thing. By the time most people are adults they have been well indoctrinated in the idea that diapers are only for babys and you don't want to be a baby, period. 

There is a lot of pressure put on children not to wear diapers, a lot of shaming and worse. That tends to stick around for life, its why most adults are so against diapers. 

Sadly a lot of that stuff persists to later in life, and a lot of adults still have that fear of being seen as a baby, the shaming of having your classmates laugh at you and worse. Never mind the beatings that would be included with that sorta thing. Bullys are allways looking for people that are social outcasts, safer for them to bully after all.

 

This is what I'm thinking. Generally speaking, and painting with a broad brush, I wonder if kids being forced and shamed into potty training before they're ready leaves some subonscious trauma deep in the psyche. Consciously, as they grow up, they might not be aware of it. But its there, hidden deep down, and this could play into why adults wearing diapers are so stigmatized.

[cathdiap]

I am glad it is. If my fetish would be broadly accepted and welcomed that would be the end of the fun.

i do think however that more people than we are aware of are a bit curious and maybe even a little excited by the idea of wearing a diaper. There are way too many jokes, references and hints about wearing adult diapers in the media and the entertainment industry to assume that we are the only ones having feelings for diapers.

But they simply don't want to give in to it and actually start wearing and using them because they know there would be no way back. ?

Once ABDL always ABDL.

[Kawaharu]

Sadly, many adults would be embarrassed if they got thrown back into a diaper but that's slowly coming around as more of the population is aging and getting older. Health issues are starting to become known at an earlier age than ever. It's like now being in diapered has less and less of a stigma than it once was before and it's slowly becoming more acceptable and more open about in society. I have seen people become more aware and accepting of those who have to wear diapers for medical reasons. The whole idea of only babies that wear diapers is slowly going away simply because disabled people are becoming more mainstream in society and people are understanding that some people have to wear diapers because of disability and medical issues.

Even for me as an adult baby, I am slowly seeing society become more accepting and more open to people like me who wear diapers for medical reasons. Although on the medical side, they still call them Briefs but I still call them diapers because in the medical side, they think diapers are for babies and briefs for adults. To me, a diaper is a diaper no matter if it's an adult or baby, a diaper is a diaper. Which is why, i have seen some nurses that care for me know I wear diapers and even refer to what I am wearing is a diaper and not a brief. Even in society, people are slowly coming around with those who have to wear diapers for medical reasons and it's slowly becoming more acceptable. I have even seen instances where people are slowly coming around and accepting people like me who wear diapers for medical reasons and how being an adult baby helps me cope with being kept in diapers. It's why my family, friends and medical staff have all become comfortable and accepting of me being diapered and being an adult baby instead of an adult. They even treat me more like an adult baby instead of an adult.

As for me, being an adult baby and incontinent, I am not embarrassed, ashamed or humiliated for being kept in diapers. Diapers don't embarrass me and I know I need them and I know I belong in diapers. I know I will always be in them and I'm even proud, happy, comfortable and confident in being diapered. It's why I'm so confident and comfortable with being diapered and being diapered around people.

[Cruiser 03]

I am incontinent and diaper dependent , they don’t embarrass me . I am mature enough to need diapers, I am mature enough to admit using them without feeling embarrassment , there’s a very good reason diapers exist , some people require them as adaption to live a regular life like everyone else . It shouldn’t be a big deal .

[Alyeskabird]

Need to remember that the whole potty training thing has been changing and evolving. Used to be people would start trying to potty train at like a year old, some cases earlyer. Now days, or last time I actualy looked at it, the potty training age had moved to 3ish and even older. Kindergarden tends to be the finnal point for a lot of perents, and a lot of schools  refuse to deal with changing some kids diaper. Some perents even just teach the kids to change there own diapers. With more people not getting diaper shamed growing up, there is a slow and gradual change in how people view diapers.  Even take the time to look at what happens in other contrys, and even in the US. Its getting more and more common for people to wear diapers for events and such where getting to a bathroom is problamatic, aka, concerts, big sports games, things like that new years thing in NYC. Heck, wedding diapers are a thing now.  In japan and china commuters wear diapers on public trans, cause its insane trying to fight your way to a bathroom, only to stand in line for a couple hours to go pee.

Thats also why there are more and more brands of diapers showing up on store shelves. Used to be, you wanted an adult diaper, you got eather attends, or depends, or store brand, or nothing else. If you wanted other than that, you had to hit a medical supply store. Even then they only had a limited selection. Now days, even the grocery store will have 4-6 brands available, and a lot more at like a drug store.

Sadly most stores only have the standard crap that is available in the US, aka, mostly lower end stuff. The law

[Kawaharu]

56 minutes ago, Cruiser 03 said:

I am incontinent and diaper dependent , they don’t embarrass me . I am mature enough to need diapers, I am mature enough to admit using them without feeling embarrassment , there’s a very good reason diapers exist , some people require them as adaption to live a regular life like everyone else . It shouldn’t be a big deal .

I totally agree. I'm diaper dependent, Incontinent and an adult baby. I'm not even embarrassed or ashamed for being kept in diapers.

[FretaBWet]

It's not just the stigma that society attaches to adults in diapers that is a problem. Even more of a problem is the self imposed stigma of many members of this site. Just the mere mention of someone having their diaper showing brings out the judgements from some people on here. A lot of people on here wear because it's a sexual fetish. They see any evidence of a diaper showing no different than a domanatrix going out in public in six inch steletos, seamed stocking with garters, a corset and a mini skirt out in public. It's just a diaper, it's not a big deal and just because you have a happy ending in your diaper at home doesn't make it indecent to be seen above your waist in public. Someone may notice you wearing a diaper but it's unlikely they are going to immediately think you are using it for sexual purposes, unless they have a diaper fetish lol.

Hugs,

Freta

[oznl]

8 hours ago, cathdiap said:

There are way too many jokes, references and hints about wearing adult diapers in the media and the entertainment industry to assume that we are the only ones having feelings for diapers.

I’d really like to see it that way but I’m well aware that humour is also a social-glue that has a role in sanctioning “unacceptable” behaviour.  They laugh AT us, not WITH us.

1 hour ago, FretaBWet said:

Even more of a problem is the self imposed stigma of many members of this site. Just the mere mention of someone having their diaper showing brings out the judgements from some people on here.

 

I’m guilty of being a little judgy on that.  Diaper-exposure that’s an almost-inevitable part of fulltime diaper usage (peeking, bulges etc) doesn’t bother me so much (although I’d continue to try to keep my diapers to myself as I would any other kind of underwear).  Where it crosses a line for me is for some who are specifically looking for shock reactions from vanilla folk.  I believe that’s something that hurts all of us by perpetuating stereotypes and retarding social tolerance.

19 hours ago, Enthusi said:

I feel like I’m missing something about how undesirable diapers are for most adults. 

In general however, I think elective diaper usage ticks a LOT of social taboo boxes.  Immersed as we are in this self-selected and vanishingly-small demographic, we can lose sight of that. 

I did however feel for the individual you mentioned who'd rather battle cancer than risk a diaper.  THAT looks to me like a skewed sense of perspective.  I actually suspect vanilla folk would find wet diapers little more than occasionally inconvenient and on occasion quite nice if they could only put down their conditioned prejudices.

[cathdiap]

6 hours ago, oznl said:

I’d really like to see it that way but I’m well aware that humour is also a social-glue that has a role in sanctioning “unacceptable” behaviour.  They laugh AT us, not WITH us.

Maybe so, but in their businesses it's always about the number of views and apparently the topic of adult diapers works in their favor. This means they know there are plenty of people out there curious enough to watch their stuff. I think what you call "social glue" is an attempt to dispel the serious doubts that they know many people have about why we always try to conform to social norms.

If people didn't have to deal with all the social pressure to behave normally, there would have been a lot more experimentation with all sorts of crazy things. In nature we are inquisitive and creative creatures, it depends on your personal obedience to our current society whether you want to give in to it or not. The creation of my stent to achieve incontinence and become dependent on diapers is my humble proof that I don't care all that much about this society.

[stevewet]

I have worn nappies 24/7 for 10 years and after a short while stopped caring what others think. 

[deewet]

The stigma of wearing "diapers" is going away quickly it seems.  Point in context is all the adds on TV about wearing fancy pullups which are nothing but diapers with a different cover to seem more like regular underwear.  If you doubt this, take a walk into any pharmacy or big box department store and walk into the adult incontinence isle.  Many stores now have several as the choices are so many.  

Yes, these are not the very long lasting ABDL versions, but they are getting better and better it seems IE TENA and even Depend are making better longer lasting products that appear in these spaces.

Obviously, there is a need for these products, IE more people with problems than we believe, or these products would not be so apparent and in such large quantity.

And again to my main point, the adds that we see a lot of anymore on TV are helping greatly to diminish the stigma that has existed over needing to use diapers as an adult.  No matter what they call them these days, they are still diapers!

 

 

[Kawaharu]

8 hours ago, stevewet said:

I have worn nappies 24/7 for 10 years and after a short while stopped caring what others think. 

I'm like that as well. I have worn diapers for over 10 years and now I stop caring what others think. I don't even care if someone notices me being diapered.

6 hours ago, deewet said:

he stigma of wearing "diapers" is going away quickly it seems.  Point in context is all the adds on TV about wearing fancy pullups which are nothing but diapers with a different cover to seem more like regular underwear.  If you doubt this, take a walk into any pharmacy or big box department store and walk into the adult incontinence isle.  Many stores now have several as the choices are so many.  

Yes, these are not the very long lasting ABDL versions, but they are getting better and better it seems IE TENA and even Depend are making better longer lasting products that appear in these spaces.

Obviously, there is a need for these products, IE more people with problems than we believe, or these products would not be so apparent and in such large quantity.

And again to my main point, the adds that we see a lot of anymore on TV are helping greatly to diminish the stigma that has existed over needing to use diapers as an adult.  No matter what they call them these days, they are still diapers!

The stigma still persist in society but I think it's slowly going away because the population is aging and medical issues are starting to be common and known. You factor disabled people becoming more normal in society as well. It's why your seeing more stores have better diapers and ABDL stores coming out with better diapers than before. I've even seen people becoming for accepting of those who have to wear diapers and wear them for medical reasons.

[messybutt2]

I'm not sure how it is for everyone else but for me diapers keep me happy and safe. I've had a love and been in diapers for a while now. I don't flaunt my diapers in public I'm always discreet always have a onesie on with plastic pants or some sort of diaper cover.  I'm sure it can be embarrassing for some but I've gotten over that fear. If someone finds out then they find out.  You're not harming anyone or yourself. You don't have to be old or a baby to wear them . They're here for our use . Just my opinion on the subject.  Hope you find it helpful.  

[fixitboy]

Yes. For most people it's their worst nightmare come true.   Whial for people like us it's our goal in life......it's why diaper feddish isent openly accepted like other lifestyles.   I even had people that where open bdsm and other feddish say my diapers feddish was just to weird for them.   

[Wheels]

Sorry if I'm re-posting what others have said in this thread, but I can't help but feel that a big part of it is a shame we feel in childhood if any of us still need diapers above a certain age or have some sort of a wetting/messing accident. We grow up in various forms of pressure reminding us how it's totally unacceptable among our peers. Even as an adult with the ability to rationalize, emotion of shame can still remain for a long time.

As unfortunate as my spinal cord injury has been in my life, I was very lucky that I strongly desired to be in diapers since I was a kid. And when the opportunity presented itself that I start wearing diapers while still in the rehabilitation phase of my recovery in my new life, I remember being mortified at the thought of any of my friends seeing my diapers when I was in my early and mid-20s. I don't think anyone would've ever thought negatively or made fun of me for it because it's implied by many that anyone in a wheelchair has to wear diapers. But regardless, I still felt concern and embarrassment.

I think the more recent generation so with access to pull ups probably feel it a little bit less? It would make sense to me if many kids growing up with access to these quasi-diapers, or had friends that wore them, would have less embarrassment or think negatively of others meeting them.

[Ivanna P. Friely]

I would think that on some level it ties in to our innate programming to dislike the smell of and to distance ourselves from eliminations? It's not just humans, I don't know enough to say *all* animals do this but we certainly know lots of animals including humans developed the ability eliminate away from themselves and their social area so as to not give clues to predators, we are supposed to have an instinct not to carry the waste around with us. 

 I've also read about chimpanzees being tested for their aversion to feces by food rewards; they were presented with a totally clean snack, one contaminated and one that the chimp was made to think might be contaminated by putting mud on it. They always choose the clean one but then they're tested with reduced options and the chimps won't eat the contaminated food but they'll also avoid the one they think might be contaminated unless there's no other option, and they'll carefully inspect it before trying to eat the untainted part too. They have innate knowledge that it is dangerous to touch feces; this is the same reason other people's farts are so much more offensive to us than our own, we know their bacteria could be dangerous.  (I can't cite sources for these, I just consume a lot of neuroscience stuff out of interest).

Obviously dogs just happily going around eating cat shit doesn't stack well with that argument. 

Anyway I reckon if not a direct connection that people consciously think about with diapers it would be one reason this will probably always be the way it is, we're all affected unconsciously by instinct. 

[stevewet]

After 10 years in nappies 24/7 I can tell you it is not a big deal. No one cares. All my friends and family know I wear nappies all the time and don't have a problem with it. They all knew that growing up I was a chronic nightly bedwetter and it became old news very quickly and no one was bothered

[Nat]

On 1/2/2023 at 12:28 AM, ~Brian~ said:

there is even people that wear diapers for comfort reasons and that is considered in my mind to be also medical because sometimes it could be mental physical emotional or psychological as a reason that you wear diapers. Autistic people also have reason to wear diapers as well, because for example they may find that they are dealing with tactile sensations or the way it feels, and it makes them feel better, or helps them to function better and, and that is also good.

Unfortunately this is also seen as a diaper fetish. 

Another thing IC people are concerned about is wondering if people are going to think they are a diaper fetishist because they wear them and are not doing anything else to not need them anymore. 

I also hope this isn't true but I hear a rumor from an online friend that if you work with kids such as if you are a teacher, you have to prove your medical issue to the school and go to the doctor about it. Okay but what about women who give childbirth and then are leaking, do they need to prove their urinary leakage by simply getting a note from the doctor about it so they have a "prescription" to use pads or adult pulls ups? If these people have to prove this isn't a fetish but it's a IC issue thing, that is ableism since IC is a disability, same as OAB. To me this is like asking someone to prove they have diabetes by bringing in their medical info about it from the doctor office or to prove they have a medical issue to explain why they take medication. Gotta be sure they are not on drugs nor a drug addict because they are on prescription pills. Diapers are still stigmatized if they are also being sexualized by vanillas now. 

On 1/2/2023 at 6:04 PM, FretaBWet said:

It's not just the stigma that society attaches to adults in diapers that is a problem. Even more of a problem is the self imposed stigma of many members of this site. Just the mere mention of someone having their diaper showing brings out the judgements from some people on here. A lot of people on here wear because it's a sexual fetish. They see any evidence of a diaper showing no different than a domanatrix going out in public in six inch steletos, seamed stocking with garters, a corset and a mini skirt out in public. It's just a diaper, it's not a big deal and just because you have a happy ending in your diaper at home doesn't make it indecent to be seen above your waist in public. Someone may notice you wearing a diaper but it's unlikely they are going to immediately think you are using it for sexual purposes, unless they have a diaper fetish lol.

Hugs,

Freta

Sadly on places like on ADISC, I see diaper fetishists comparing diapers to being gay or trans and queer and gothic. They really don't see how this is sexual and the mental gymnastics they play there to justify diaper exposure in public and going out as ABDL than being discreet about it. They want the whole world to know they wear diapers and are a big baby. Even Reddit ABDL has become that way too. It's like the ones who are against public abdlism and diaper exposure are fading from the sites. More like they are going silent about it and not going to argue about it or they leave the forums because of it. 

[Kawaharu]

5 hours ago, stevewet said:

After 10 years in nappies 24/7 I can tell you it is not a big deal. No one cares. All my friends and family know I wear nappies all the time and don't have a problem with it. They all knew that growing up I was a chronic nightly bedwetter and it became old news very quickly and no one was bothered

I'm the same way as well. After so many years of being in diapers 24/7 and permanently. It's hardly ever a big deal. All my friends, family and doctors knows I wear diapers all the time and they don't ever have a problem with them. They know my incont issue and know I need them.

[Babypants]

Having lived outside the US for many years, I would only add to the many good comments above that the diaper stigma may be strong in the English-speaking world, but it has been non-existent in some of the countries where I have lived.  If you live in a big city in mainland China, and are going home to the ancestral village during Golden Week, the longer the interurban trip, the more likely it is that you will be wearing a diaper.  In Japan, for several years now the sale of adult to baby diapers has stood at a ratio of 3.5 to 1.  Even if I was not incontinent, there is no way that I would have boarded a subway in Tokyo at rush hour without being diapered.  It's even worse in Bangkok, which is my second home.  The subway, the skytrain, driving through the streets ... you are really foolish if you aren't wearing a diaper when you set out.  No one in my family compound even gives it a moment's thought; it's just something you do before venturing off to join the dreaded rot tit ("traffic jam" in Thai).  In his above post, Brian has really put his finger on what it means to be incontinent.  Over the long haul, incontinence is a nuisance-- a logistical challenge-- and nothing more.  Where can you change when you are out in public?  Good quality disposables are expensive, so can what I'm wearing take another spurt, or will I end up leaking all over the place?  In my experience, even in America people are relieved to learn that I am wearing a diaper when I attend a dinner party or a business meeting for the simple reason that no one wants me to stain their couch or chair.  I typically get the guided tour of bathroom and bedroom alike!

Let me leave you with this.  I am a racing fanatic, and for many years have had seats at the very top of the stands at Talladega.  For years, one of the spotters' stands was just above my seat, and over time i got to know some of the spotters pretty well.  I never went down, and they could never venture off.  Get the hint?  Look around you from one day to the next.  How many people that pass through your field of vision are wearing diapers not because they are incontinent or have a fetish but because it may be the only practical alternative to wetting or messing themselves?   

[stevewet]

On 1/7/2023 at 12:49 AM, fixitboy said:

Yes. For most people it's their worst nightmare come true.   Whial for people like us it's our goal in life......it's why diaper feddish isent openly accepted like other lifestyles.   I even had people that where open bdsm and other feddish say my diapers feddish was just to weird for them.   

When I became incontinent and enuretic due to diabetic related nerve damage my wife suggested nappies at night and then during the day as my daytime wetting increased. At first I was horrified at the thought of wearing nappies in my late 40s but had to agree it was better than a soaking wet bed every night and wet pants during the day. It didn't tale long before I just accepted being in nappies all the time and now it is just normal now. Most people know I am incontinentand enuretic due to diabetic related nerve damage and no one seems bothered by my nappies.

On 1/2/2023 at 10:36 PM, Cruiser 03 said:

I am incontinent and diaper dependent , they don’t embarrass me . I am mature enough to need diapers, I am mature enough to admit using them without feeling embarrassment , there’s a very good reason diapers exist , some people require them as adaption to live a regular life like everyone else . It shouldn’t be a big deal .

I can tell you once you hit 60 the medical proffesion don't even bat an eyelid. My diabetic nurse asked me how I was coping with my incontinence. I told her I now had little if any bladder control during the day and none at night and she just noted it down without any real response.

On 1/2/2023 at 11:33 PM, Kawaharu said:

I totally agree. I'm diaper dependent, Incontinent and an adult baby. I'm not even embarrassed or ashamed for being kept in diapers.

I am not an adult baby but certainly DL now I feel no shame or embarrassment over wearing nappies all the time 

[Newbee]

It’s taken me a while but I need nappies and if anyone has a problem with that then it’s there problem but on saying that I don’t go around showing my nappies to everyone