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Chapter 23: The Little That I Know Three Years Ago I now knew for certain that there were no pull-ups or diapers in the house. All I had managed to find were a bunch of Jackson's old baby items, but pacifiers and bottles held no interest for me. I may have wanted to wear diapers, but I didn't have the slightest interest in behaving like or being treated as a baby. There was so much that I didn't know and very few means of attaining the information that I sought. My fixation on pull-ups ebbed and flowed for the following year after I first learned about those bedwetting pull-ups from my cousins. It wasn't as though there was any point where I didn't want to try to wear one, but without any actual ability to do so, the desire would fade out of mind for weeks or months at a time until something would occur to spark those urges again. I would catch a glimpse of an advertisement for diapers on the TV or in a newspaper. I would be at the park when a toddler would run by with the waistband of a pull-up clearly sticking out the top of their shorts. I would overhear some of my mom's friends talking about struggles they had with getting their toddlers to potty train. And then my mind would be back at it again, fruitlessly searching for information until I once again gave up hope of ever getting my hands on pull-ups of my own. <><><> My mom kept me close at hand when we went shopping for groceries. Jackson was still young enough to sit in the cart, facing Mom as she pushed it down most – but not all – of the aisles in the grocery store. To my dismay, there were a number of aisles that we never seemed to go by anymore, ones that I wished I had paid more attention to previously but that had been before I had known what I wanted to look for. Slipping off to check out the baby aisle was never an option. Mom preferred that I stay within arm's reach of her at all times. I had to make do with attempting to discreetly peek down the baby aisle as we went by, taking in its distinct scents. But it was hard to make out much from a distance. There were so many brands and styles, and I wasn't sure exactly what I was looking for. That changed one day right at the end of summer break, several months since my interest in pull-ups had begun. One of my mom's co-workers was having a baby shower for her first baby, which she was expecting in a couple of months, and Mom needed to pick out some diapers and wipes as a present. I found myself standing smack dab in the middle of the diaper section of the baby aisle, completely overwhelmed by all the options, brands, and styles. All the bright colors and smells made it hard to concentrate on what I was looking for. I needed to find something that was meant for older kids my age, not toddlers or preschoolers. There were regular diapers and pull-ups and ones that seemed to be a mix of the two. On a few of the other packages where information about the sizing was available, it was again clear that none of the products were remotely close to my size, as if that wasn't clear from the age of the models on the front of the packages. I began to wonder if that scene with my cousins a few months back had actually been real. Could it have just been something that I dreamed up in the boredom of that vacation? Then I saw a package. There was a picture of a sleeping girl on it, more than old enough to be my age. Could that be it? But then I saw the phrase "nighttime underwear" beneath the brand name. That didn't make any sense to me. Why would they be selling underwear for girls in the baby aisle? That was just plain silly. "Maddy," Mom said. "You need to keep up with us." While I wanted to see if there was any other information to glean from the package, I didn't have any choice but to obey Mom as I turned around and dashed ahead to catch up to her shopping cart. What exactly did that package mean by "nighttime underwear," and why was it located in the baby aisle close to all the diapers and pull-ups? It would be a long time before I walked through the baby aisle again. <><><> An indoor water park in the winter made for a perfect vacation. Grace was busy lying on her stomach on one of the poolside chairs. Teenagers were weird. It wasn't like she could catch a tan inside. Mom was at least reading a book while reclining in her chair. Dad was munching on some snacks, keeping an eye on Jackson and me from off in the distance. I was playing with Jackson in the kiddie pool. The warm water only came up to our ankles, but there were tons of fountains, sprinklers, slides, and water toys to play with. Above us was a bucket connected to a swivel. It gradually filled with water before tipping over and emptying its contents onto whoever might be unlucky enough to be standing beneath it at the time. Jackson found the idea hilarious. Though for him it was more amusing when the bucket of water was dropping down on my head rather than his. I knew better than to look up to try to see if the bucket was close to overflowing. I had made that mistake once and wasn't interested in making it again. At this point, my hair was already thoroughly soaked, so there was no use in fussing over yet another bucket of water pouring over it again. The small clang the bucket made as it began to tip was the only warning I got. I closed my eyes and shut my mouth as the warm water – at least it was warm water – poured over my head. I opened my eyes to the sight of Jackson giggling and pointing at me like a maniac. "OK, it's your turn now," I said. I stepped away from the spot under the basket and motion for Jackson to take my place. It seemed to take the bucket a little under a minute to refill before soaking its next victim. But my eyes drifted away from Jackson. Her top was a normal swimsuit, but around her waist was an uncovered swim diaper, blue with a picture of a mermaid on it. It was absolutely mesmerizing. Jackson yelled at me to pay attention to him, and when I looked again in the direction the girl had run off in, I had lost sight of her. I knew that I wouldn't fit in a swim diaper made for a baby, but the site of the swim diaper still stirred up that longing that had gotten tucked away for a couple of months. Since that disappointing trip through the baby aisle, my interest in diapers had dropped off. With diapers on my mind again, I couldn't help but notice them everywhere I went at the water park, and over the course of the long weekend, I spent much more time playing with Jackson than I normally would have, much to the delight of Grace and my parents. It wasn't so much that I cared to spend time around my brother, but being in the kiddie pool gave me a chance to catch glimpses of diapered kids as they splashed around in the water, wishing all the while that it was me who was wearing those diapers and pull-ups instead. <><><> I learned not to leave the room during commercial breaks. I didn't care much about the cartoon show that my brother was watching on TV. I found it difficult to concentrate on my book with all of that background noise. Ever since coming home from the water park vacation, I had been obsessed with learning as much as I could about pull-ups and diapers, and I had discovered an easy way to do so. I endured the annoying shows my younger brother watched for one, and only one, reason. The programs geared toward kids his age often featured advertisements for pull-ups and diapers. I had become familiar with the names of all the brands and the different types of pull-ups and diapers they would sell, and all the new features they were constantly adding. I peeked at the TV over the top of the book I was reading. A new commercial break had just begun. The first two advertisements were disappointments. The first was for a cereal brand I absolutely detested. The second was for baby formula. A few commercial breaks had passed by already without any of the advertisements I had been looking for, and I was beginning to wish I had just spent the morning reading in my room instead when the next ad caught my eye. One of the brands I was familiar with was advertising a new type of pull-up. A boy and a girl around Jackson's age were both going through the routine of getting ready for bed with their parent's assistance. There was the familiar scene of the closeup shot of them sliding the pull-up over their waists. And then the lights went out, and the designs on the pull-ups were glowing in the dark. But I knew by now not to get my hopes up. The kids in the advertisement were Jackson's age. No matter how cool those pull-ups looked, they weren't for me, either. The ad continued by showing how to activate the pull-ups first by holding them under a light. The advertisement was over all too soon, and Jackson's show resumed. But instead of turning back to my book, I thought over again about what I had just seen. This didn't confirm that the pull-ups I remembered my cousins' wearing were real, but it did confirm one important detail. There were pull-ups made specifically for use during the night. I wondered again about the brand of nighttime underwear that I had seen in the diaper aisle nearly half a year ago. There was a word I had learned in class the other day. It was really long, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to remember how to spell it. The concept of the word – euphemism – was also hard to grasp, and the idea that a word might not mean what it actually meant was simply too confusing. It didn't seem right. It was so much easier when people simply said exactly what they meant, rather than the opposite of it. But it was like a lightbulb had gone off in my head. Could nighttime underwear actually mean something entirely else? I tried to recall the name of the brand I had seen that day in the baby aisle. It took several minutes for it to come back to me. I had to recite the alphabet silently in my head several times before I remembered it. I whispered the name of the brand silently to myself over and over again, like a mantra. With the name of what I was looking for now in mind, I kept my eyes peeled for any glimpse of it, but several more months passed by without any additional luck. I managed to catch a glimpse or two – or at least thought I had – of the packages of so-called nighttime underwear in the baby aisle. But that was only for seconds and from a long distance, so I wasn't able to glean any more information than from the time I had spent first looking at it. My remaining options were highly limited. There was absolutely no scenario in which I would look up that brand on the family computer or tablet. I couldn't have my parents question why I was seeking out that information. I knew instinctively that they would not approve of this quest. There was no way that query would escape Dad's notice, and I had no desire for the questions that would surely follow. And despite my continued vigilance in watching ads on the TV, I never managed to come across one for that nighttime underwear. <><><> About a year had passed now since the day I had worn pull-ups My biggest fear was that I was growing. I was quite a few inches taller than a year before. I wanted to believe that they made pull-ups for teenagers, but without any direct evidence to confirm that, my worry was that I would eventually get my hands on the bedwetting pull-ups, only to find that I had done so too later and would no longer be able to fit into them. I was once again on the alert for any information I could find about that nighttime underwear brand. It was a week after my tenth birthday. To celebrate, I had gone with Emma and Angie to an indoor trampoline park. I had put the thought of those pull-ups out of my mind for a while, as I hadn't recently come across any new information. The allure of the TV advertisements had faded. It was just the same old information re-packaged in different ways. Yes, I would still look up at the TV at the familiar sound of certain jingles, but I no longer went out of the way to stay in the living room as Jackson watched the TV. The smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies wafted upward through the air and to the second floor of the house. I followed the irresistible scent downstairs as it grew stronger and stronger until I came across a bunch of cookies spread out on old pages of yesterday's newspaper on the dining room table. To my disappointment, my parents only got the newspaper on Sunday. Mom said the only reasons she got it at all was for the advertisements that came tucked inside it, though all I cared about was pulling out the comics section from the middle, often wishing that I would be able to get the comics from the middle of the week as well. Mom was in the kitchen, putting one final batch of cookies in the oven. She gave me permission to eat two – and only two – cookies. I stared down at the newspaper pages as I tried to determine which two cookies were the biggest. None of the newspaper articles carried any interest to me. Reading the news was something that adults did. However, the newspaper pages also included a section with advertisements for the local grocery store that Mom preferred to shop at. There were ads for a variety of baby products. I glanced over at them, not really expecting to learn anything that I already didn't know. There were headings for different products that were on sale: wipes, formula, diapers, and pull-ups. I turned my attention to the images in the pull-up sections, which, according to the ad, were on sale for fifteen percent off this week. And there it was. The picture was tiny, but unmistakable. It was the same package of nighttime underwear that I had come across so long ago in the grocery store. And there was no mistaking what it actually was. It couldn't have been an accident that it had been listed in the pull-ups section. I squinted down at the newspaper as I removed a couple of cookies and put them on my plate. There was some tiny writing on the package, but it was indecipherable with how small the picture was. The text next to the advertisement said that the sale included small through extra-large sizes, but I knew better than to let that phrase get my hopes up. I had seen a couple of ads for extra-large pull-ups before, only to find that this just meant they were for preschool-age kids and not toddlers. I poured myself a glass of milk in the kitchen and slowly ate my cookie while considering this new revelation. I realized that the most important thing I had learned wasn't that these nighttime underwear were actually pull-ups. That was a discovery I had made on my own a few months back. No, what I realized was that there was another potential untapped source of information about these pull-ups. From then on, I made sure to skim through all the advertisements in the newspaper. These special bedwetting pull-ups didn't show up often, but each time they did, the same problem remained as before. The information contained in the ads was minimal, with nothing to suggest whether I would still be able to fit into these pull-ups or if I had already outgrown them in the past year. There wasn't any information about the weight ranges or clothing sizes that the pull-ups would fit. But with the confirmation that these pull-ups existed, I found it impossible to put the topic out of my mind. After that moment, not a single day passed where I didn't think about what it would be like to be wearing a pull-up once again. But actually getting my hands on one of those pull-ups seemed like an impossibility for the time being. It wasn't likely that I would be visiting those cousins anytime again soon, and I didn't know of a single other kid my age who was a bedwetter. It was time to take matters into my own hands. If I couldn't get a diaper of my own, perhaps I could make one for myself. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

I am self-employed and work partly out and about and partly at home. Mondays I am WFH all day except going to the bank in the morning. I love working at the computer or sitting on the sofa in just my nappy and a top/tshirt. Sometimes I have my dummy and bottle too but that's just occasional. I can answer my emails / the phone, do online or paperwork stuff all while nappied and no one knows Anyone else like this? Isn't it great

Academy II By Mia Moore "At the end of the world, there will be neither clamor nor calamity, neither echo nor epoch. It will be mired in silence and sleep, in deliverance and death. At the end of the world, there will be both patience and purpose, both temperance and time. Only then will it be graced with eternity, and from eternity, a chance." -The Source, in valediction Chapter (Last) One "Why..." Bala sat in the dark. A spotlight clicked on above her, forming a puddle of yellow light beneath her dangling feet. She was sitting in a high chair, with her head down on the tray. When she finally found the energy to sit up, another spotlight clicked on, six or so feet away from her. Ai was standing in the middle of the pool of light. She was naked. So was Bala. Neither of them cared enough anymore to dress themselves. In the indefinable vastness of possibility, clothes were a chore. Their bodies, however, were second nature. First nature, perhaps. "Why?" Bala asked again. "Why can't you leave me alone?" "You're one to talk," Ai said sharply, but her sharpness was that of a toddler's knife. Fragile, plastic, without an edge. Behind them, a wheel turned. An infinite, infinitesimal, contradictory wheel, decorated with time and fate. "Just stop it," Bala begged. Tears filled her eyes. Big, wet, floaty tears. They fell away from her without gravity, like a spilled canteen on a spacecraft. No, Ai thought. Because that was what she always said. That was how she always felt. But this time, the word was too heavy. She had pushed that word - "no" - up the hill so many times, for it to tumble back down. As she tried to shove the word out of her mouth, she was too weak to move it a single inch. "Whatever," Ai said instead. She sat down in the darkness and held her head in her hands. Behind her, a wheel turned. The two of them were each quiet for a moment, because they both knew that it didn't matter what they said. They were like oil and water, like the sun and the moon, like politicians across the aisle: understanding, empathy, and common ground were impossible goals. Ai and Bala were mutually exclusive, and both of them knew it. That fact was, perhaps, the only thing they'd ever agreed upon. "Out of all the places I've been, this is the worst." Ai finally mumbled, after a time that could have been a moment, a while, or forever. "Alone, in a room, with you?" Bala asked rhetorically. "Agreed." It seemed even the universe was tired of the two of them, and now they were in time out. A fitting punishment. As they waited in silence, an image flickered above them, grainy and jittery like an old overhead projector from an elementary school on a low budget. It showed Ai, and it showed Bala; as children, as friends. A screenshot of a reality that never existed, and for the two of them, never could. Bala looked up and watched the image melt into another, like a movie playing in the sky. Two little girls, ignorant of the complexity of the universe. Two little girls, playing in the din of inconsequence. Two little girls, purposeless. Two little girls, happy. "I tried to make this happen so many times," Bala said. She had no reason to talk to Ai. So she went on, to herself. "I tried to make us friends. I tried to make a world where there were no repercussions for anything." "A world where I didn't exist," Ai added. "A world where you didn't exist. A world where neither of us could remember anything." "A world frozen in time," Bala continued. "A world made up of nothing but emotions." "A world with big people and small people," Ai remembered. "A world where we were all specks of light." "A world of different worlds. Where everyone could have their own world." "A world where we were characters in a story. Remember that?" "I ran out of ideas, and I had to break the pattern," Bala sighed. "I still don't know how you got out of that one." Ai didn't answer. "I liked the world with all the map puzzles," Ai said. "You solved them faster than I could make them." Silence. "I liked the one with the pet people," Bala said. "Yeah, I was… a puppy girl or something?" Bala didn't answer. "I don't know what to do," Bala confessed. It was baffling to hear the will of God admit to such a mortal failing. "Trying to make sense of you is like trying to catch a deluge in a paper cup." It was silent. No time passed, because time did not exist. Behind them, a wheel turned. "Do you know why I'm strong enough to be here?" Ai finally asked. "Do you know why I can fight you like this?" "I know everything," Bala sighed, like everything was the worst thing to know. "That woman from the Academy--" The Academy. Those two words brought back a surge of nostalgia to the both of them. It was like hearing a nickname you were called as a child, a nickname you didn't particularly like. The movie above them flickered to disparate, inconsequential scenes from their pasts, interlaced in an order unorthodox. It was lifetimes ago, but Ai remembered. "Maria, she..." "Betrayed the Academy," Bala finished. Ai shook her head. Maybe Maria did betray the Academy, but she did more than that. She betrayed herself. Ai looked up at Bala, sitting naked in the high chair. And though she thought nothing of her own nudity, Bala looked incomplete. Had she always looked that way? When Bala looked down at herself, she was suddenly wearing a onesie with little angel wings and halos printed on it. Underneath it, the familiar feeling of a diaper. Bala looked up at Ai, sitting naked in the pool of yellow light. She had more thoughts in a single moment than all of consciousness through all of time, but it wasn't enough. A diaper and a onesie was not a malicious outfit, and nothing explained why Ai would afford her any kindness at all. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I hate you," Bala said flatly. "I know," Ai sighed. "You betrayed me," Bala said, and fresh tears floated around her head. The movie above them flickered to one scene in particular, when their stories overlapped. The moment when Bala was sent back to the Cold Room, and Ai was given all the answers she could ever want. "I know..." Ai watched the low-quality film reel. That moment was so long ago, and it was only a moment ago. Ai knew, even then, that she had made a mistake. Throughout every universe, every battleground, Ai justified her actions with a single doctrine: next time, she could do better. That moment with Bala didn't define her, no more than the thousands of mistakes before it or the million mistakes after. In time, she would learn. She would grow. She would change. But as she watched that movie, she realized... she hadn't changed at all. Maria betrayed herself and the institution she worked hard to build, all so that Ai could have some autonomy in the new world. And what did Ai do with it? She fought for countless lifetimes to be the same person she had always been. The same woman who walked away from Bala all those lifetimes ago. For the first time in infinity, Ai understood why Bala was doing what she was doing. Because it wasn't enough to trust in humanity's desire to grow. Change was hard. Change was long. And for so many people, they never bothered to start. Ai never bothered to start. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I'm sorry," Ai said. Big, wet, floaty tears filled her eyes. "I should never have treated you that way. I should never have acted like my needs were more important than yours." For a time - although time was nonexistent and incalculable now - Bala was quiet and still. Frozen in thought. A thousand universes could have been born and a thousand and one could have died in the moment that it took her to form words. "You're right. You shouldn't have treated me that way. You shouldn't have acted that way. You shouldn't have. But you did. And now look where we are." Bala remembered a thought she had a long time ago, at the end of one of her stories, and a thought she kept close to her throughout the incalculable iterations of the universe. "This is all your fault," Bala spat at her, eyes wet with tears. "I know..." Ai rubbed her eyes. She didn't want to cry in front of Bala. She didn't want to show weakness. But something about the space she was in, or something about her realization, was too much to mask. Tears dripped away from her cheeks, forming globules of glittering water that drifted around her head like planets around a star. For a while, in relative terms, Bala and Ai cried. Above them, the movie of childhood friends - the impossible universe left unmade - flickered onto the screen. The two little girls cried together, on opposite ends of a front stoop. They held themselves instead of each other. Ai racked her brain for some way to make it up to Bala, but it wasn't possible. She couldn't make up for millennia of suffering. She could never atone for bringing sin into Bala's worlds. All at once, her resolve began to crumble. Could she ever really change? At this point, would it even matter? Ai wanted to sink into her old ways. She wanted to slip into self-pity or self-hatred, old clothes she never had the time to wear anymore. She wanted it to be easy. Finally, Ai and Bala were on the same page. There was no reason to fight. If she let Bala have her way, all her sins would be erased. She could start over again, as someone perfect. She never had to know the feeling of wanting to be more than she was. Of not being enough. But Ai's catharsis lasted only a fraction of never. Ai looked up at Bala, crying in the high chair. Overhead, a new movie was playing. Moments of Bala, through her childhood. Through her job as a nurse. Through the Academy. Through universes, like pages of a flip book that didn't tell a story. But Ai knew the story. She'd known it for a long time. Ai remembered a memory of a memory. Behind her, a wheel turned. Ai slowly got to her feet, wiping the tears out of her eyes and splashing them into the ring around her head. It was a solid circle now, glittering in the spotlight. But it vanished along with Ai when she stepped out of the pool and into the darkness. Alone with an empty spotlight, Bala cried. She cried, because she couldn't do it right. And she knew, deep down, Ai wasn't the reason her universes kept failing. The truth was, Bala just wasn't good enough. Then Ai appeared in front of her, in her spotlight, and touched the tray table of her high chair. It evaporated into glitter. Bala looked up at Ai, and before confusion could wash over her face, Ai wrapped her arms around the crying girl. Above them, in the movie, one girl had moved to the other side of the stoop and hugged the other. "Shh..." Ai whispered. "It's okay. It's okay." "It's not." That was Bala's first thought, her first response, her knee-jerk reaction in the form of words, as instinctual as pulling away from a flame. Not an answer from her brain, but from her lips. How could things ever be okay again? There was nothing left but the two of them, and for anything else to exist, it was predicated entirely on Bala's will for it to be. How could she ever will someone to be part of her constant, unending failure? The truth was – to Bala, in her nothing – Ai meant everything to her. Ai was the only thing she couldn't control. Bala sobbed. Each tear had enough energy to birth a billion realities. Each heaving, choking, ugly cry took away so much potential that even entropy itself ceased to exist. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I'm lost… I've lost…" "You didn't lose anything," Ai said warmly, holding Bala tight to her chest. "They gave you an impossible task. To make a world where everyone is supposed to be happy? To make something perfect? It's not possible." "It is," Bala argued, because it had to be possible. Because otherwise, she never had a chance to succeed in the first place. And all this was for nothing. "It's not," Ai said again, softer. "It's not possible to be perfect. Nothing is perfect. Nobody is perfect. You... you can't be perfect." "I have to be perfect," Bala tried, sobbing into Ai's chest. She clung tightly to Ai's white dress, hand-embroidered with little flowers. She wanted to cling to a dress. She wanted Ai to be wearing it. And so she was. "No, Bala. You don't have to be anything. Not perfect. Not a baby. Not an adult, either. Not a god, or a nurse. And certainly not this. You don't have to be anything you don't want to be." But only one thing came to mind when Bala thought about what she wanted to be: "I want to be a good girl..." she cried. Ai knew how Bala felt, because Ai too wanted to be a good girl. Every girl wanted to be a good girl, and every boy wanted to be a good boy, and everyone wanted to be a good person. Because a drive for goodness was not the product of the Academy, but the product of humanity. A long time ago, something came into existence, and that thing was one thing. Be it consciousness or God, that was all there ever was. Then, something happened, and there was something else. This dichotomy led to discussion, debate, protest, argument, and war. Right versus wrong. Good versus bad. But at the root, good has always been nothing more than the thing you want to move toward, and bad has always been the thing you want to move away from. The difference may be subjective, but the purpose is clear: movement. At the end of a million worlds, with millennia of experiences behind you, it's not hard to see the truth. In that moment, it wasn't hard for Ai, and it wasn't that much harder for Bala either. Behind them, a wheel turned. "You're a good girl," Ai said, hugging Bala even tighter. "You're good, because you try to be better. That's all it takes." With each passing universe she created, Bala measured goodness by the starting point. She had to optimize the rules, not to allow for betterment, but to encourage stagnation, because the only way to go was down. If what Ai was suggesting was true, and it was movement that mattered, then Bala had created worlds without "good". How could she be a good girl in a goodless world? All this time, Bala had been thinking that, if only Ai would stop interfering, she could find the right answer. She could create the perfect world. But if Ai wasn't there to foil all her plans, would she ever be happy? Could she? The truth was, a long time ago, Bala had given up on ever finding happiness. That was why her mission was so important: it was her last chance to do something right. For the first time in time's nonexistence, Bala was at a loss. Behind her, a wheel turned. "I have to figure it out," Bala mumbled under her breath. "I… I gotta…"

 "And then what?" Ai asked. She broke her hug, but she kept the soft tones. "You'll always worry about it. Always think that you're doing something wrong. It's not fair to you, Bala. Everyone isn't your responsibility."

 Bala shook her head quickly.

 "You're just… trying to trick me. That's all you do, is trick me and hurt me."

 Ai hesitated. Was Bala wrong? Had Ai ever done anything for Bala, or in Bala's interests? She couldn't remember a single time, in all the universes they had shared together.

 "Listen…" Ai said quietly, taking Bala's hands in hers. "I know you don't have any reason to trust me. I know I probably shouldn't trust you, either. But you're not a villain. And neither am I. And, I'm starting to think… we aren't even the heroes. We're just people."

 Bala looked up into Ai's eyes, still blurry with tears. She had to be the hero. She had to be the martyr. She had to die on the cross, to save everyone else. She didn't have to be happy about it. Good and happy… she couldn't be both.

 "I have to…" Bala muttered.

 "I don't think so," Ai said simply. "But, I'm done assuming everything I think is right. So, if you really want to, then… make a new world. Try again. I won't stop you this time."

 Bala stared blankly, as if in all the impossibilities the multiverse had to offer, this was the least likely.

 "I don't believe you…" Bala said.

 "Well, I can try my best," Ai answered, because she figured it was about time she believed in someone other than herself. For better or for worse, Ai wouldn't make the same mistakes. There are two important facts about faith that worked in Ai's favor at that moment. The first: you have to be entirely without evidence to have faith, which was perfect for Ai and Bala, who had no evidence that either of them was worth trusting. The second: you're more likely to put your faith in something when you're desperate, and Bala was very desperate. Behind them, a wheel turned. "…what kind of world should I make…?" Bala asked. At first, Ai thought her question was rhetorical, like someone asking themself "what to wear…" in the morning. But, like an unanswered instant message, Bala seemed to be waiting for Ai to take her off Read. "Are you asking me?" Bala nodded sheepishly. Ai had absolutely no idea. She had spent the better part of existence in reboot universes. She'd seen everything there was to see. She knew how every single outcome of every single variable would play out. And so did Bala. But there was one pervasive feature that always seemed to come up, and Ai's curiosity once again got the best of her. "Do you actually like all this baby stuff?" Ai asked awkwardly. She quickly added: "No judgment." "I... I'm not sure," Bala admitted, looking up at the two children talking on the stoop. "I just don't want to have any more responsibility..." In a way, Bala was the caregiver to every soul in the universe. But before that - before the Academy - Bala liked having responsibilities. She liked feeling needed and valuable. She liked doing the right thing, even if it meant sometimes doing the wrong thing. Maybe she didn't even want to be a baby at all. She just didn't want to be a mom. Ai and Bala were quiet for a while, as each tried to think of the right answer to an unanswerable question. What ending would be satisfactory? What was a good conclusion, after such an impossible, incoherent series of events? How could either of them hope to make everyone happy? "What about that?" a voice said. Not Ai's voice, and not Bala's, but the voice of God herself. Ayoka Kanoska stood a few feet away, dressed in something impossible. She was pointing up at the sky, where a movie was playing. The two little girls weren't on the stoop anymore; they were playing hop-scotch with sidewalk chalk. Whatever turmoil had them crying just before… it was gone now. Behind Aya, a wheel turned. "It's not possible," Bala sighed. She'd spent so many eternities with Aya that even her sudden presence wasn't a surprise anymore. Her hopeless optimism, her unflinching generosity, her unbearable kindness. And what had Bala done with it? Mutated her. Abused her. Took her for granted. More tears spilled from her eyes and began to orbit around her head. "It's okay," Aya said warmly, resting a hand on Bala's back and kissing her temple. Ai took an awkward step backward, and the spotlight around them grew to accommodate. "How can you say that? Don't you have any self-respect?" Bala shouted. But her voice was no louder than a hatpin hitting the carpet. And Aya's voice was full of every star in the universe. She was true power, and Bala was as fragile as the human will. "We chose this together," Aya said simply. "We've sacrificed everything, you and I. I don't regret it." "How can you not?" Bala laughed, rubbing tears out of her eyes. In that moment, all three of them knew the same truth of Bala: that when Maria gave her that gun, she wished now that it had killed her. Behind her, a wheel turned. Aya took Bala by the hand and helped her to her feet. The high chair was gone, as if it was never there to begin with. Then Aya wrapped her arms around Bala in a hug. For no good reason other than there was no good reason not to, Ai stepped forward and joined in. "I don't regret it," Aya said again, "because I would rather be here with the two of you than nowhere at all." That hug lasted forever. It still goes on, to this day. It transcends space and time and everything known and unknown in the universe, and it has nothing to do with Aya or her power. It lasted forever because hugs between friends always do. In front of them, a wheel turned. "What about that?" Aya said again, pointing up at the sky where a movie was playing. The two little girls were still playing hopscotch. The little girl next door came over to play with them. "It's not possible," Bala said again. "I've tried." Ai watched the three of them jumping from one square to the next, taking turns. One and two and three four and… she fell. The little Indian girl, with dark hair and wet eyes. She looked up at the other two in a panic. Afraid of… something. But they each took a hand and helped her up. She tried again. "No…" Ai said quietly. She finally understood what Aya was saying. "Not a world where we all get along, or a world where we can be friends. But that world." Ai pointed up at the sky where a movie was playing. "That's… no way." Bala shook her head in a panic. "I have hundreds of requests! I promised I'd do it right, I promised, and they're gone now, so I have to–" "You don't have to," Ai reminded her. She took Bala's hand. "You can always say no, and you can always change your mind," Aya said. She took Bala's other hand. Once upon a time, Bala Khatri would do anything to honor someone's choices, even if it went against her values or beliefs. Now, she was asked to do that again: to honor her own right to choose, even though it went against her values and beliefs. In front of her, a wheel turned. "We don't know anything about that universe," Bala muttered. "It could be a horrible world. Death and famine and hatred… if I could take a look, tweak it…" "You'd never stop," Ai said with a sad smile. "I've seen you do it," Aya concurred. Bala watched the movie in the sky, as the child that could be her readied herself to once again hopscotch across the sidewalk. Her friends on the sidelines cheered her on. "She doesn't even know…" Bala said, with fresh tears floating down her cheeks and collecting in a circle above her head. "That girl, she doesn't know what I am. What we are. What we've done…" "We don't have to be this," Aya reminded Bala and Ai both. Then she gestured at the movie playing overhead. "We can be that, if we want to." "And what? Forget everything? Pretend we're not the creators of this universe?" "It's not pretending," Ai said to herself, working through everything she had learned. Everything Maria did, everything she failed to do. Then she said: "We can just choose to be different. We always could have." Bala was at a loss for words. Ai and Aya were proposing ego death, to cease to be. To willingly give up parts of who they were, for a chance at being something different. To… change. At the heart of it, that's how change works. A part of you has to die for another part to live and grow. That's why change is so scary. That's why nobody ever wants to do it. Not until it's too late, and things are too terrible. Nobody ever changes… until they can't stand not to. "I don't want to be in charge of everyone…" Bala finally said. "I don't want to have all this power," Aya added. "I don't want to keep fighting all the time," Ai finished. All three of them looked up at the movie and watched it together. They stared at it for so long that they started to believe the girls in the spotlight were a dream, and the girls in the grainy, low-budget movie were real life. In front of them, a wheel turned. Eventually, Aya looked at Bala. Eventually, Ai looked at Bala. Eventually, Bala looked at the floor. With enough time, no wall can stay up forever, not even the bonds that hold together the human soul. All three of them were on the same wavelength, and all knew what was coming next. Bala slowly nodded. It was time for this to end. But then she said: "I want to check on something first." "No," Ai and Aya both said in unison. "One thing," Bala begged. "One thing, I promise. And… in return, you can each check on something too." Ai and Aya both looked at each other. Three rules. Three rules, and everything else was left up to chance. "What do you want to look into?" Ai asked. "If the Academy exists," Bala said simply, "because I don't want it to." Everyone agreed. No one should have power over another's fate. Ai was next. She could have anything in the new world. She could be rich, or she could be powerful. She could have her fiancé back, but she'd had thousands of fiancés. Thousands of life partners. And each one was as special and important as the last. In the new world, whoever she found, she knew they would be exactly what she needed. So Ai thought of something else. "I want everyone to always have the opportunity to grow, no matter what happens." "Are you sure?" Bala asked skeptically. She had known Ai for a long time, longer than anyone knows anything, and Ai's request felt out of character. So she challenged it: "Even Maria Porter?" Ai sighed. She didn't like to think about Maria, because she couldn't help but think the worst of her. But the woman who came into the Memoriam and apologized, that wasn't the Maria that Ai knew. Whatever happened to her, whatever made her change… it was nothing short of a miracle. Ai wanted a world where miracles could happen. "Yeah, sure," Ai shrugged. "She deserves a chance to be happy." "That's very gracious of you," Aya smiled. "Hey, I'm not actually a demon!" "No, you're an angel," Aya said, and tapped the halo of tears circling around Ai's head. Ai blushed. Bala reached above her own head and smiled to herself. All that crying, all that emotion, had formed a halo. Maybe she had been a good girl after all. "What about you?" Ai asked Aya. "Last one." "Hm…" Aya put her finger to her chin in thought. In every universe, she always had exactly what she wanted, even when what she wanted wasn't good for her. She had power beyond even her own comprehension. But power wasn't enough. Even the Source knew it: one person alone couldn't reset the world. It had to be two. It had to be together. Aya looked at Bala, her connection to humanity. Her chariot, pulling the sun across the sky. While Aya sat at the lead, Bala did the work. She was the guide, like Virgil through the afterlife, writer of myth and creation. Aya looked at Ai, her connection to reality. Her magician, a polymorph spell, a serpent in defense of fate at Delphi. While Aya was young and naive, Ai followed her instincts. She was the challenger, full of mistakes and questions as juicy as apples. Never once did Aya see evil in either of those two girls. Perhaps because there was never any evil to begin with, or perhaps because Aya couldn't find any within herself. In her soul, there were no shadows; it was full of fire, of destruction and light. But Aya chose to never nock an arrow. She never found evil beyond redemption, and that was a choice anyone could make. "No matter how powerful any one person gets," Aya decided, "I want the world to be everyone's responsibility." The rules were set, the choices made. Three girls, three wishes, and the dawn of something new. A place where they could be less of what they had to be, and more of what they wanted to be. A place where I get to put down this pen and do the same. They got three rules; I get three more sentences. With nothing left to do and no time left to do it, God hugged her angels goodbye and hello. In a dark room, lit by a single spotlight and the glow of an old movie, the world came to an end for the last time. But that hug will last forever. [End.]

First and foremost, I want to thank @Sophie ♥, @Pudding, @Personalias, @bigred0603, @Lyra Silver, @PeculiarChangeling, and @bbykimmy for their installations in Academy II. When I decided to write seven different worlds for the finale, I admit, I found the task incredibly daunting. And when it was suggested to me that I should instead let seven other authors write those worlds, I admit, I found that to be even more daunting. I am so used to being in control of everything in my life, lending out something as important as Academy Works - especially for the finale! - felt so dangerous. But they brought the worlds to life in ways I never could have. They created their own art within my art, and I will be forever grateful to have worked with such incredible writers and such incredible people. I believe that Academy Works is stronger for their involvement, and I believe it will make this next chapter all the more powerful. Secondly, I want to thank everyone who has been reading this series. When I started writing Academy Works, I wanted to prove to everyone that I was good at something. That I could write some kind of huge epic baby smut story that had something for everybody. Something people would want to show their friends, something they would be inspired by. I wanted to go down in history as one of the great ABDL authors, just like all the people who worked on A:2 with me. Just like Ai, I wanted to find my purpose. But now that it's ending, I realize that I don't care what happens next. If my story ends up forgotten along with all the others on this website, if nobody ever talks about it again, that would be okay. Because writing Academy Works has taught me so much. It's given me so much. Wonderful friendships. Camaraderie with other writers in my field. A readership that thinks and cares and speculates and treats my words like they are important. A sense of competence. Academy Works is also the reason my girlfriend and I are together. So... to everyone who read this series, and especially to those who have left comments, thank you so much for showing me that the journey is more invaluable than any destination. Anyway... The end of Academy Works has always been in the back of my mind. I imagined a world after countless worlds, where everyone was too tired to keep on going. Where they had to stop and think for once. To talk. To connect. For those who have played Xenogears, I took a lot of inspiration from the second disk. But I didn't know how it would truly end until I started writing it. Until I read all of the A:2 stories from the authors listed above. I saw the puzzle come together and the pieces fall in place. And I ended up with... this. I hope this is good enough. I'm terrified that maybe people will read the ending and hate it. How am I supposed to wrap up everything at this point? How can I possibly make everyone happy? Well... I guess I can't. I'm not perfect. But I hope I'm perfect enough for all of my fans. Once more, in valediction... thank you all so much. ~Mia Moore~

After being diapered off and on basically my entire life and missing the days where I'd frequently wet the bed when I was a kid, I decided to just start wearing and using premium diapers 24-7 in December 2023. I also recently started following the 12 month diaper training guide that gets mentioned here quite often and now in April 2024 I'm proud to say that I'm wetting frequently with strong sudden urges but not much comes out and also dribbling involuntarily post void. I also woke up to a wet bed last night without remembering peeing for the first time in many years and I couldn't be more proud of myself. This stage seemed to come recently and out of nowhere for me after only feeling like I needed to pee sooner than before and that was it for a long time. I'd wake up needing to pee, frustrated that my body woke itself up to do so, peed myself then went back to sleep. This is finally starting to change. So don't get discouraged or frustrated if you're trying to accomplish the same thing I have. Be patient, stay hydrated and wet yourself no matter what as soon as you feel the urge to pee. You have to act like you don't have any choice. It's a mental barrier that you must break because we were trained at a very young age that it's not okay to pee yourself. Tell yourself that it is okay even if you think you might leak. I'm Looking forward to continuing down this path and I'm looking forward to the point of no return. To those that think that it isn't possible to make yourself incontinent, my nose and sheets are saying otherwise right now...

Not since I bought the ball gag.

Chapter 22: The Night Before I returned downstairs to find that Hannah had resumed watching the movie without me. Like before, she was sitting on the floor. Emma remained absorbed in her smartphone on the couch. "You were in the bathroom for a really long time," Hannah said as I took a seat behind her on the couch. Emma groaned at her cousin's lack of social etiquette, though she still didn't look up from her phone. I didn't respond at all to Hannah's comment. Anything she might think I had been doing in the bathroom was better than what I had actually been doing. I hoped that I had managed to put everything back into the suitcase exactly like I had found it, and that the pull-up I had tried out wouldn't show any signs of having been worn. I wasn't able to pay attention to the TV. It didn't matter that this was my favorite of the Harry Potter movies. I simply couldn't sit still and focus on it. The diapers I'd discovered in Hannah's suitcase both worried and intrigued me. Why was it that she would need to wear those to bed rather than the pull-ups? There was only one explanation that made sense. The pull-ups must not work well enough for her at night. There was no question from when I was holding the diaper that it had significantly more absorbent padding, but it seemed to follow that it would be more effective at absorbing urine. But I struggled to understand why that was the case. The pull-ups seemed to work perfectly fine for Hannah during the day. Or did they? When Emma had mentioned that her cousin had peed all over the couch the other day, I had simply assumed that she must have not had a pull-up on at the time. But what if that wasn't the case? What if she had been wearing the pull-up, and it hadn't been able to completely absorb the accident? Maybe those pull-ups didn't work one hundred percent of that time? What would that mean for my own fake bedwetting once my parents got the pull-ups for me? I, of course, would be wetting them, but what would happen if they leaked all over the bed? I couldn't see my parents wanting to continue getting pull-ups for me if that were to happen. They wouldn't see them as having any value if there were still wet sheets to deal with, anyway. Would I end up needing to wear diapers as well if I were to continue faking the bedwetting? And did I want to wear diapers rather than pull-ups? That was a question I didn't know the answer to at the moment. I hadn't ever remotely considered the possibility of wearing a diaper rather than a pull-up outside of the makeshift diaper I had attempted to make for myself once a couple of years back to disastrous results. Would a diaper feel as good as wearing a pull-up? Would it feel better than wearing a pull-up? That wasn't a question I could answer without having tried one on, but there hadn't been an opportunity to do so. From the windows looking out over the backyard, I could see that the rain hadn't let up a single bit. I checked my phone. The forecast said the downpour wasn't supposed to stop until sometime overnight. The movie finally came to an end. Hannah wanted to move on to the next one immediately, but not before taking another toilet break, as her watch had just gone off a couple of minutes earlier. "I need to put my foot down," Emma said, though she remained seated on the couch with her legs curled up to the side. "I'm not watching another one of these movies this weekend." Hannah was gone a lot longer than before. It was hard to tell since it was raining, but I thought I could hear the sound of someone going upstairs and walking around. When she finally returned, she didn't take kindly to Emma's decision to move on to any activity other than watching the next Harry Potter movie. Hannah stomped her feet and ran off when Emma refused to hand over the TV remote to her. Hannah returned a few minutes later with her mom, who tried to helpfully suggest that perhaps we could make some TikTok videos with Hannah instead. That seemed to test Emma's limit on wanting to do anything but watch another Harry Potter movie, but she agreed. There was still another hour or so before Mom was going to come and pick me up. We managed to get a couple of someone choreographic dance videos made that Emma promised Hannah that she would post to her account, though when Hannah went off to use the toilet again, Emma whispered to me that she was going to delete it all once Hannah was gone, saying that she didn't want to ruin the vibe on her account. The doorbell rang a few minutes later. It had to be Mom coming to pick me up. Hannah stayed behind in the living room as Emma and I went to the front door. Mom was chatting casually with Emma and Hannah's parents in the entryway when we arrived. "Are you excited about summer break?" Mom asked Emma. "I will be when Angie is back from her road trip," Emma said. "I'm looking forward to the sleepover on Maddy's birthday." Mom nodded in response to Emma's statement and shifted her gaze over to me. And just like that, I was caught. Mom wasn't supposed to have known that I'd already invited Angie and Emma to have a sleepover on my birthday next weekend. "Where's Hannah?" Emma's aunt asked. "I don't know," Emma said. "Maybe in the other room." "Can you go grab her? I'm sure she'd want to say goodbye since we're leaving early tomorrow morning." Emma trudged back off toward the living room. I caught her rolling her eyes once she was at an angle where her parents couldn't see it. A little while later, there was a loud patter of feet running along the wood floor, and Hannah sprinted around the corner. I couldn't help but once again find my eyes drifting down to her waist. As she came to a stop, her shirt lifted up briefly, giving one final half-second glimpse of the pull-up beneath her shorts. "Bye!" Hannah said with a wave at me. And just like that, she was done, having turned back around to sprint off toward the living room. We continued to make small talk about plans for the summer for a few minutes, and then it was time to head home. I closed the door behind me after getting into the passenger seat, bracing myself for an awkward conversation. Mom turned on the ignition without saying a word and watched the rear-view camera as she carefully backed out of the driveway. Once we were out on the road, the questions began. "Why does Emma think there's going to be a sleepover on your birthday?" she asked. She had me there. It was stupid bad luck that Emma had thought to say anything about that to Mom. Mom had shot down the idea of an all-nighter, and she had made it clear that she wasn't going to OK the idea of a sleepover unless the anti-bedwetting pills had worked. I really didn't want to answer Mom's question, even though it wasn't as though she likely knew the answer already. "I told Angie and Emma that a sleepover was the plan for my birthday." "Madelyn, you know that I had said that wasn't an option unless we managed to figure out what was happening with the bedwetting." I nearly did it. Even though I had planned to bring up the topic of pull-ups tomorrow, I nearly went forward with the speech I had rehearsed about how it might be good to try them. But I instead fell back on a more vague excuse. "I just figured that maybe the doctor would have something that would stop the bedwetting so I could still have the sleepover. I didn't want to tell them that I couldn't do it." "That doesn't leave a lot of time," Mom said as we turned onto the road that led back to our house. "I want to make sure any solution actually works before letting you do a sleepover. Maybe it would be best if we just postponed it. Your friends can stay until it is time to go to bed. It's not as though you'd really miss anything while being asleep." That was the last thing I wanted, especially after having already told my friends that a sleepover was going to happen. "Please don't tell them that it is canceled yet. I don't want them to think anything is wrong." Mom was silent for a bit as she pulled into the driveway and waited for the garage door to open. "That's fine for now," Mom said at last. "But if we don't find a way to deal with the bedwetting before then, it isn't going to work to have the sleepover." <><><> Another night. Another set of pills to take before bed. At least this was going to be the last time. Despite my pleas to get out of taking the pills tonight, Mom insisted that I should give it one more try before going to the doctor's appointment in the morning. "I don't want you staying up too late tonight," Mom said. "The appointment is first thing in the morning, so you need to make sure you set your alarm for eight." Great. Pills. No more water for tonight. No chance of peeing the bed this evening. And I had to get up early in the morning. I held out my hand, and she dropped the two pills onto my open palm. I grabbed a glass with a small amount of water in it from her as well. Mom watched as I popped both of the pills into my mouth. I resigned myself to the possibility of dealing with an actual headache tomorrow morning as I began to raise the glass of water to my lips. Some loud yelling in the distance – which sounded like my younger brother, Jackson – suddenly grabbed Mom's attention, as she turned around to look in the other direction. Mom's back was turned as she headed down the hallway in the direction of the tantrum that Jackson seemed to be throwing. That wasn't common behavior for him, but when it happened, it usually took both of my parents to rein my six-year-old brother in. This was my chance. I pulled the two tiny pills out of my mouth and placed them in my pocket before quickly chugging down the small glass of water. With my plans for the evening suddenly looking much more positive, I didn't throw a fuss at going to bed earlier than I normally would have on an evening during summer break. I made sure to use the toilet while my parents were helping my brother get ready for bed, making sure they would know that any bedwetting would be happening in spite of all the precautions that were being taken. I flushed the two pills down the toilet, watching carefully to make sure that they didn't resurface. The best part about having avoided taking the pills tonight was that I wasn't going to have to avoid drinking anything afterward. My mouth had been so parched the past several nights when I had gone to bed without sneaking a drink from the sports bottle I had tucked away in my bedroom. Alone in my bedroom, I raised the bottle to my lips. I couldn't believe that I was somehow actually excited about the idea of drinking lukewarm tap water. The likelihood of being able to wet myself in bed tonight allowed me to manage to set aside my disgust at the bitter taste of the water. The problem of going to bed this early was that I still had plenty of time to kill before midnight. I tapped open the web browser on my phone, trying to recall the name of the website Hannah had mentioned reading those Harry Potter fanfiction stories on. I couldn't recall the exact name, but a quick Google search of the acronym she had mentioned brought up a link to the website. I tapped on the link, and then I groaned as a new pop-up appeared on my phone, one that was unwelcome but familiar, a message that the website was blocked due to the parental restrictions on my phone. Well, that was just great. Defeated, I set my phone down on the bed. It wouldn't be the first time that an otherwise appropriate website had been mistakenly blocked by the software. If it was something Hannah had access to, I couldn't imagine that it was actually anything that bad or inappropriate. I would need to ask Dad about the website tomorrow, and he would be able to update the permissions on the parental controls like he had done for me before, though perhaps I should consider coming up with a reason for wanting to access the website other than wanting to read Harry Potter stories. A sense of melancholy struck me as midnight approached. This might be the last time of wetting myself like this. Going forward, I would be wearing a pull-up to bed every night for the foreseeable future. I had first wet the bed nine nights ago. And tomorrow I would be going to see a doctor. I was amazed at how quickly everything had progressed. I'd tried to put off thinking about what the doctor's appointment might mean for me in the morning. What tests would they end up running? What theories would they have for why the bedwetting might be happening? Was there anything I had done that might cause them to suspect that I was actually wetting the bed on purpose? One thing was clear. Regardless of what happened at that appointment, I was going to need to find a way to broach the topic of pull-ups with Mom tomorrow. With any luck, tomorrow night, I'd be going to bed while wearing a pull-up identical to the one of Hannah's that I had tried out earlier today. Having managed to avoid taking the anti-bedwetting pills, I didn't have to struggle at all to manage to wet the bed, and I took in the sensation of the warmth spreading beneath my waist. Even though everything had gone right so far, even though I was still completely on track for my plan to succeed, another thought began to fill me with a new worry as I lay on top of my thoroughly soaked bedding. What if the pull-ups didn't work for me? --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Daniel is a young man kept in permanent babyhood. When a chance discovery reveals the truth of the world and his position in it he is determined to "grow up". The question is whether his adopted mother and sister are ready to let him... --- Writing is my passion and my only source of income. If you enjoy my stories you may be interested to learn that you can see every update I post one week before the rest of the world with a $5 pledge on Patreon. For $10 you can see everything early AND 50 full length stories that can only be found on my SubscribeStar and Ream pages! The money I get goes to paying bills and putting food on the table so I appreciate all of my patrons and would appreciate anyone who might be interested in supporting me to check out my Patreon ❤️ https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy --- Training Daniel By Elfy Daniel rolled over and let out a little grunt as he stretched his legs. He could feel the diaper between his legs pushing his thighs apart, the padding was swollen from another night in his ever-present crib. Beneath him, underneath the soft cotton, a plastic sheet crackled as he moved. It was the usual noises of his nursery in the morning. “Wakey wakey, sleepyhead.” That was another familiar sound in Daniel’s nursery. It was his Mommy, Sarah. She was usually the one to wake him up in the morning which was fine with Daniel, it was preferable to his mean sister, Amber. They weren’t his real Mommy and sister, of course. Daniel’s real parents had been killed when he had been very young and it was Sarah, a friend of his biological mother who had taken him in. It had all happened when he was very little so he didn’t have any memories of his parents and his Mommy was never keen on discussing his family. Daniel slowly opened his eyes. The curtains had been opened and he was left blinking in the early morning sunlight as he adjusted to the world. The familiar white bars of his crib towered over him on all sides, above him a mobile which featured various farmyard animals wearing capes like superheroes. Beyond Daniel’s crib was his nursery. Something that hadn’t changed in his twenty years of life. It was primarily baby blue and white. His crib was on the opposite side of the room to the door, behind his head the long changing table stretched out underneath the window. On the opposite side of the room next to the door was his toys. A big chest filled with all the toys that he had accumulated, above that was the shelves filled with books for bed time. By the foot of the crib was the chest of drawers and closet filled with his clothes. “Did you have a good night?” Sarah asked as she stood on the release and lowered the side of the crib. Daniel nodded his head as he rubbed his sleepy eyes. He felt his mother leaning into the crib and instinctively spread his legs for the morning diaper check. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that he was wet. He wet in his sleep every night, it was no big deal. There was something different about today though. Normally Daniel’s diaper checks involved a quick poke and a prod but today his mom’s hand lingered. As he finished rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he looked down at his crotch. His mom’s large hand was massaging the front of the diaper, the wet padding rubbing against his skin. “Mommy?” Daniel asked in a little voice. “That’s right, baby.” Sarah smiled warmly as her hand continued to dance against the padding, “It’s your milking day.” Daniel felt his heart leap a little. He had never been taught things like the days of the week, he never really knew what the date was or even what month fell in what season, he had only really learnt a little about the time of day from watching clocks. No one had taught him things like that, things men didn’t need to know. So Daniel never really knew when his scheduled milking days were, he had to just wait until they happened. The rubbing continued until Daniel let out a little moan and then it stopped abruptly. He sighed, it was always the way. His Mommy and sister liked teasing him at the best of times but it went into overdrive when it was time for his milking. It was as frustrating as it was exciting. They had started around the time he was eighteen and continued seemingly at random ever since. It was one reason he was kind of glad he didn’t live with his actual family because it would make all this a lot weirder! A lot of that frustration was down to the “toy” that was kept almost permanently locked on to Daniel’s private parts. A rubber chastity device wrapped around his penis like a cocoon. It was flexible enough but it prevented him from getting too excited, it meant that whenever he was teased in that area he could only feel a small amount of the sensation. The clear rubber was designed to only encase his dick though, the balls underneath were left uncovered and it was that area that the two women always seemed to focus on when teasing him. By the time Sarah had finished rubbing the front of the wet diaper Daniel was feeling a lot of frustration. His poor little penis strained against its rubber prison without being able to break out. The side of the crib came rattling down and Daniel held his arms out to be picked up by his Mommy. Daniel was clutched tightly to Sarah’s chest as he was taken across to his changing table. It was a little awkward with Sarah’s large chest meaning Daniel couldn’t lay flat against his Mommy. He wrapped his legs around her middle and his arms around her neck. With a grunt of effort Sarah lifted Daniel and sat him on the edge of table. He scooted back and laid down for his inevitable diaper change. He looked out of the window as the tapes were pulled away from the shiny front landing panel. The diaper slackened in stages until the last tape came free and the padding slid down a little. Sarah then opened the diaper up to the cool air of the nursery. Daniel had gone through more diaper changes than he could count. Not that he could count particularly highly, he always started having trouble when it got to double digits and he ran out of fingers to use. Usually the next stage would be the baby wipes but today was milking day and that meant there was a slight change of plans. With a gasp Daniel felt his Mommy gently rubbing the skin of his ball sack. He was always kept completely shaved down there for hygiene reasons and his skin was baby smooth. He closed his eyes as felt his Mommy’s fingers, they were so delicate at times it was hard to feel that they were there at all but the electric excitement was always present. “Do you like that?” Sarah asked happily. Daniel nodded his head. It was embarrassing but he couldn’t deny how it made him feel. Perhaps it was because his milking days often seemed so distant to one another but every time someone touched him between his legs it felt incredible. It was no wonder men were kept in diapers, they had to keep this whole area locked away in case someone brushed past them by accident. For several minutes Daniel was left writhing on his changing table as he was fondled by his Mommy. He wondered if other men had such strict milking days like he did, maybe he was one of the lucky ones and some people didn’t get milkings at all. That would be a disaster, it was one of the things Daniel looked forwards to most. “We better get you all padded up before we have an accident on our hands.” Sarah said when she finally pulled her hand away from Daniel’s crotch. Daniel sighed. He almost felt like he could feel his balls throbbing after all the attention, he ached for more but he knew from past experience that he could only expect further teasing until the prison around his penis came off. A fresh diaper was pulled off the small shelf below the padded top. Daniel heard it crinkling as it opened and as his legs were lifted up like they weighed nothing he turned to look out the window. There were a lot of downsides to men being inherently weaker than women but they certainly made diaper changes easier. When Daniel’s hips were lowered it was on to the open padding. The familiar feeling of a thick diaper wrapped up between his legs and over his caged genitals. Sarah flattened out the plastic over Daniel’s tummy and then taped it closed. The routine continued as Daniel lifted his arms again, he was picked up and sat on the edge of the table. With one hand on his chest to stop him from falling Sarah turned to some clothes that she had prepared from the previous night that were hanging over the back of the rocking chair in the corner. “A special outfit for a special day.” Sarah said. Daniel didn’t recognise the clothing. It must’ve been new. Whilst a lot of clothing was store bought a lot of his clothing was also made by his Mommy at home, she’d grown quite good at it but this was clearly one of her creations. Firstly a t-shirt was pulled over Daniel’s head. It was plain white and not particularly notable but the shortalls that came with them were very much created at home. They had once been plain but Sarah had been doing some embroidery. Now the large chest piece, rather than being blank was stitched with the words “Baby’s Milking Day!” “Isn’t it wonderful?” Sarah said effusively as she slipped Daniel’s legs into the correct holes and put him in the infantile clothing. “Yes Mommy.” Daniel said with a smile, “Thank you.” Daniel saw his Mommy leaning down to him and he instinctively lifted his arms. He was picked up under the arms and sat on his Mommy’s hip. He yawned and rubbed his eyes as he was carried downstairs, his legs dangled uselessly as the pair of them descended the steps. With everything in the house designed for the much taller females Daniel had always seen being carried around as a lucky privilege. Trying to climb up or down these stairs would be like trying to scale a mountain. The living room was already occupied when Daniel was carried in. Amber was sat on the couch. She was a couple of years older than Daniel but the differences between them made it seem much larger. She was seven feet tall and had inherited her mother’s large breasts. She was pretty but mean, especially towards Daniel, and seemed to take great pleasure in embarrassing him whenever she got the chance. She always seemed to go even harder on milking days. “You play in your pen alright?” Sarah said as she placed Daniel into the fenced area. She walked over and turned on the television. Bright cartoons starting dancing across the screen, “I’m going to get breakfast ready.” “Yes Mommy.” Daniel replied. As Daniel settled into place in the pen he reflected on life and the society that he really didn’t see a lot of. He was small, even for a male, at five-feet tall he was towered over by his Mommy and “sister.” Women were always taller than men but in this family it seemed to run to extremes, the women were taller than average and the men were shorter. Amber was seven-feet tall and Daniel’s Mommy was eight-feet. The difference in height was only made starker because Daniel was always on the floor. He was too weak to walk and he was kept that way on purpose. He very occasionally saw men walking on television but his Mommy assured him that was the exception rather than the norm. Most men were kept weak and were treated like babies. They also seemed to be kept at home a lot, Daniel had rarely been allowed to explore beyond the backyard. Whilst Amber went to school throughout her childhood Daniel was kept at home, beyond the absolute basics like speech Daniel was kept ignorant. Daniel didn’t like the way things were if he was honest. He always felt so jealous of Amber whenever she went out with friends or to work. His days consisted of sitting around in his diapers, playing and watching cartoons. A monotonous life that was occasionally broken up by special events such as… “Milking day, huh?” Amber said with a sneer, “Lucky boy.” Daniel blushed a little and looked down at the floor. He always felt embarrassed when people brought up his “milkings” even if he looked forward to them a lot. He especially didn’t like when Amber brought it up. Amber stood up and walked around to the playpen’s gate. She helped herself inside and Daniel tried his best to ignore her presence. She walked around until she stood in front of him and put her hands on her hips. Daniel looked at some of his toys on the floor and tried not to let his sister know how he was so intimidated. It didn’t work. Just as Daniel was starting to wonder what was going to happen he felt Amber’s foot against the front of his shortalls. The foot rested on the bulging front of his diaper and he immediately winced, it didn’t hurt because Amber wasn’t putting any pressure behind it but that didn’t stop the clear threat. “It’s a good thing we keep this locked up.” Amber stated as she prodded down with her foot a couple of times, “I bet it would be going off everywhere if we didn’t.” Daniel didn’t think that was fair but all he could do was scoot backwards on his padded rear to get away from the foot. He turned away from his sister with red cheeks and looked over to a simple jigsaw puzzle. He pulled it over, anything to get away from Amber’s mocking. He couldn’t go far, of course, the bars of the playpen made sure of that. “I think I’ll go out for a walk today.” Amber said airily. She made it sound like an idle thought but Daniel knew it was aimed at him, “Maybe meet some friends and go see a movie. Ooh, I hear Damage Limitation are in town, maybe I could score some tickets…” Daniel ducked his head. One of Amber’s favourite games was taunting him by talking about what she could do and what he could not. All he could do was pout and hope his sister got bored soon. When Amber suddenly stepped up to him and reached over his shoulder he was surprised, he nearly fell over as her hand went down to his diaper and squeezed the front. “Or maybe I should stay in after all.” Amber said with a small giggle, “It is your special day after all. Who knows when the next one will be?” Daniel tried to suppress a small moan as he felt Amber’s hand rub against him. The rubber toy encasing his sensitive parts did a good job of stopping most of the sensations getting through but he could still feel the pressure. His balls in particular enjoyed rubbing against the soft and smooth padding of the inner diaper. “Ugh…” A small moan escaped Daniel’s mouth. His little man was trying to stand at attention but the toy made it difficult. It wasn’t painful but it was uncomfortable. “Breakfast is ready.” Sarah called out from the kitchen. Amber withdrew her hand. She laughed as Daniel reached out his hands to be picked up, it would be a lot better than having to crawl all the way out to the dining table. He was disappointed as Amber shook her head and walked away. Daniel scowled after her. He had no option but to get on his hands and knees and scurry out towards the kitchen. Everything was so much bigger than Daniel already but when he crawled around like this it was more pronounced than ever before. He went down the long hallway to the kitchen where Amber was already sat at the table, she was leaning back in her chair and smirking as Daniel came in. He crawled around to his highchair and waited on the floor, there was no way he could climb up into it without help. “Upsy daisy.” Sarah said as she lifted Daniel up. --- If you've enjoyed this and want to find out what happens next you can do so RIGHT NOW on the links below! https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/luzh7bq3yj/chapter/2b197e1d-bf4e-46d5-a3c2-1e93f4a6a0fa https://subscribestar.adult/posts/1268609

I think most adult babies would prefer having their diaper changed, legs lifted tush wiped clean and giving a nice diaper pat when your all diapered clean and sucking your paci the whole time

You've answered your own question: Burning “good” in the pursuit of “better” is a risky strategy 🤣 In my more cynical moments (and my baseline level of cynicism is fairly high to being with) I suspect that the secret to a successful marriage is low expectations. Whilst I myself know for a fact that I am a tungsten monument to perfection 🤣, I accept that my befuddled beloved may misconstrue her bedazzlement at my wonder as flaws on my part and yet she (largely) overlooks them. For my part, I’ve learned to accept that there are aspects to her that will simply never, ever improve. For example, irrespective of lecture, learnings or lived experience, she has zero mechanical sympathy for any device that she uses and consequentially is continually breaking stuff (cue the standard disclaimers: “It just fell off”, “It was like that when I found it” and “Why does everything bad that happens have to be my fault?”) We put up with each other’s imperfections and look at the relationship in terms of its overall balance sheet. If we’d expected an uninterrupted “hearts and flowers” frolic through a field of perpetual nirvana-like state of bliss the union would have carked it on the first rubbish bin night. The nappies are a huge number in the "debit" column however. She’ll trash a washing machine and a mattress every year and nymphomania sounds like a lot of work to me 🤣 Well it's a bit better if you're not the only idiot on the special bus to crazy town 🤣 I'm trying very hard not to regret it but my beloved has other ideas.

You’re a realist. Not me, I’m convinced there’s a gorgeous, bed-wetting, nymphomaniac in my future. Just have to keep my eyes open.

Sorry for the delay again. I guess I should not write checks that I can't cash when it comes to self-imposed deadlines on posting chapters that I have not even begun to write yet. I probably should have said in my first post for this story that there will be some strong language in this story at times. If I had to give this story a TV rating overall, it would be TV-M for language. Other than that, I would consider it SFW. Chapter 7 I woke the next morning to Rachael asking if I needed more morphine. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I nod yes. Rachael injected me with the syringe of morphine, and another syringe of the nausea medicine, and started my feeding tube. I turn to my left to see that both my parents are already here. My attention snaps back to Rachael saying, “Will, you have a busy day ahead of you, let’s go ahead and get you weighed and measured.” “OK,” I said. I started to slowly get out of bed and my dad was already by my side to get my I.V. situated and helped me to my feet. I felt a weakness in my legs and was struggling to move this morning more than in the past few days. My mom, seeing me struggle, asked, “Will, how do you feel this morning?” I said, “I just feel really tired and weak.” “I'm sorry you feel so bad, hopefully, the doctors at the Mayo Clinic will help you get better soon,” my Mom said. “I hope so too,” I said. We made our way to the nurse station and Rachael weighed and measured me. Before my dad could ask Rachael said, “Alright Will, you weigh a 112 pounds and are 5 foot 4 and ½ inches tall this morning;” pausing for a second, she said, “We should be getting you ready for transport in the next hour or two. I will come check on you in a little bit to flush your feeding tube and get you ready.” I slowly make it to my room with my parents on either side of me. I gingerly get back into bed as my mom plugs my I.V. pump back in for me. My mom turned to me and asked, “I was going to pack up all your belongings to bring to the Mayo Clinic with us so you don’t have to worry about it while being transported there. Is there anything other than your backpack and toiletries that I am missing?” “Besides my stuff on the table, that is everything,” I said. She said, “OK, I will make sure I have everything to bring to the other hospital for you.” I said, “Thanks, I'm going to go ahead and brush my teeth before you pack everything up.” I got back out of bed as my mom unplugged the I.V. pump again for me and slowly made my way into the bathroom. I quickly brushed my teeth and as I was brushing my teeth, I noticed that my nails were very long. Looking in my toiletry bag, I found my nail clippers and was able to get my nails down to a manageable length. I sat on the toilet seat, pulled my socks out, and saw that my toenails were in need of trimming too, and decided to trim them while I was at it. I came back out of the bathroom to my mom waiting to help me back into bed. Once getting settled in bed I watched as my mom started packing all my belongings up. My dad then spoke up saying, “Will, is there anything in particular that you want to watch on TV?” “No, not really,” I said. My dad then said, “Sports Center it is then.” I lay in bed half-heartedly watching TV and dozing in and out of consciousness. Sometime later, I was alerted to Rachael walking into the room. “Alright Will, I’m going to flush your feeding tube and disconnect your I.V. to make it easier for being transported to the Mayo Clinic,” Rachael said. I nodded and watched her flush my feeding tube, disconnect my I.V., and throw everything away. Rachael then said, “Someone should be here soon to bring you downstairs to an ambulance for transport.” I said, “OK” “Will, I hope they find out what is going on and you get better soon,” Rachael said. “Me too, sorry about the whole bathroom and pain medicine incident the other day,” I said. In a serious voice, Rachael said, “Will, that was nothing to be embarrassed about, I have to deal with a lot worse and would not be a nurse if I could not handle it.” I said, “OK, thanks for looking after me.” “Certainly Will,” Rachael said with a smile. My mom then chimed in, ”Thank you, Rachael.” “No problem, I hope you all have a better week this week than last,” Rachael said. Around 15 minutes after Rachael left, an orderly came into my room pushing a wheelchair. He asked, “Are you William Gauss?” I said, “Yes.” “OK, I’m here to bring you downstairs for transport,” he said. I nodded and slowly started getting out of bed. My parents were already up and by my side. My dad hugged me and said, “We should be at the Mayo Clinic shortly after you get there. I love you.” My mom then hugged me and with a kiss on the cheek said, “I love you, sweetheart, we will see you in a little bit.” As I was sitting down in the wheelchair I said, “I love y’all too.” My parents both waved to me as I was being wheeled out of the room. The orderly wheeled to the elevator and we rode it down to the ground floor. He then pushed through the back of the emergency department to what looked like an exit. Waiting for me at the exit was a stretcher and a tall paramedic wearing a dark blue uniform with EMS patches on the shoulders of his sleeves. As the wheelchair came to a stop he said, “You must be William Gauss, my name is Matt and I will be your ride to the Mayo Clinic.” I nodded and he and the orderly helped me out of the wheelchair and onto the stretcher. As the orderly was leaving, Matt turned to me and said, “I’m going to strap you down so we don’t have to worry about you falling off the stretcher during transport.” I nodded and Matt processed to run a strap over my sternum, my waist, and then my thighs. Matt then said, “You're all set, let's get you loaded up for transport.” He pushed me through the double doors and out into the bright Arizona sun. As my eyes adjust to the harsh light, I see the ambulance parked about 30 feet from the doors and a short Latino man also wearing a paramedic uniform walking towards us. As he met up with us he said, “My name is Ernesto and I will be your driver today.” They both loaded the stretcher into the back of the ambulance and as it was pushed all the way in I could hear and feel what must have been it locking into place. As Matt was getting into the back to sit beside me, Ernesto said, “We should have you at the Mayo Clinic in about 30 minutes, if you need anything let Matt know.” He closed the back doors and a few seconds later I could hear what must have been the front driver door opening and closing. Moments later I could feel the ambulance start moving forward. Matt turned to me and said, “Do you prefer to go by William or Will?” I said, “Will is fine.” “Alright Will, just relax and we will have you there in no time,” he said. Nodding, I relaxed my body against the restraints and let my mind wander as I felt the movement of the ambulance and the sound of the tires against the road. Sometime later, I felt the one thing that I didn’t want to feel on this trip, I had to poop. Thinking to myself ‘CRAP!’ as I turned my head to Matt. I asked, “How much longer until we get to the Mayo Clinic?” Matt said, “About 10 more minutes, is there something wrong?” “I have to go to the bathroom really bad,” I said. Matt then said, “Try and hold it if you can but if you have an accident it will be OK.” I nodded but turned my full attention to holding back my bowels. The minutes seemed to drag on as I put all of my energy into clenching my butt cheeks together. I felt the ambulance turn and with that motion, some poop slipped out; moments later the battle was lost as I felt my body force the rest of my bowels out. I could feel it spread out all over my bottom, moving up my lower back, forward in my underwear covering my genitals, and down my thighs. I turned to Matt with flushed cheeks and said, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hold it.” Matt gently placed his hand on my shoulder and with a look of concern and pity, he said, “It’s OK Will, as soon as we get to the hospital, we will help you get cleaned up.” I nodded but looked away in shame, as I lay in what felt like a gallon of pluff mud and smelled like a paper mill. A couple of minutes later, I felt the ambulance come to a stop, and moments later, Ernesto was opening the back doors. Matt hopped out the back and they both pulled the stretcher out of the back of the ambulance. Matt took over and quickly pushed me into what I imagine is the ambulance entrance to the emergency room at the Mayo Clinic. As we make our way through the double doors into a hallway, we are met with an average-height Latino woman with shoulder-length hair, in gray scrubs. With a smile, she approached us and said, “You must be William, my name is Rosie and I will be your nurse.” I just nodded and looked down at my lap. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Matt gesture to Rosie and they both stepped away to have a quiet conversation. A few moments later, Rosie walked back up to me and said, “OK Will, Matt, and I are going to take you straight to your room on the stretcher, once there, I will help you out of your clothes so you can take a shower.” I just nodded and continued to look at my lap. A second later, Matt was pushing the stretcher and following Rosie down the hallways. After a few turns and trying my best to avoid eye contact with passers-by, we arrived at an elevator. We got on the elevator and luckily it was only the three of us, but in the enclosed space, the smell was back with a vengeance. A minute later we were off the elevator and going down another hallway. After passing what I assume is a nurse’s station, I was wheeled into a room. Matt immediately started undoing the straps, while I saw Rosie place what looked to be a large incontinence bed pad on the floor beside the stretcher. Rosie and Matt then helped me off the stretcher to stand on top of the pad. Rosie said, “Matt, at the nurse’s station, is cleaning supplies and you can throw the fitted sheet away there.” Matt said, “OK, Will, I hope you feel better soon.” Matt rolled the stretcher back out of the room and shut the door behind him. Rosie then turned to me and said, “Will, your clothes are a lost cause so I’m going to cut them off of you and then help with a rough cleanup before letting you take a shower.” In a quiet voice, I said, “OK.” Rosie took some scissors out of her pocket and then cut the pants leg of my sweatpants from the waistband all the way down to the cuff. My pants were discarded in a pile between my legs and then she did the same with my underwear. She grabbed a bunch of large wet wipes and then began to wipe down my back, butt, legs, and embarrassingly my genitals too. She let my hospital gown fall back to my knees again and then said, “Let's go into the bathroom so that you can get into the shower.” I followed Rosie into the bathroom with flushed cheeks and she started the shower, then said, “Alright Will, there is soap and shampoo in the shower already, towels and washcloths are right here,” pointing to the towel rack beside the shower, “you can leave your gown on the floor and I will have another gown and socks for you on the counter waiting for you by the time you are done.” I nodded with my cheek still flushed from what was one of the most embarrassing moments of my adult life. Rosie walked out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. I immediately stripped out of the gown and threw it on the floor, then pulled my socks off and threw them on top of the gown. Testing the water with my right hand, I stepped into the shower once the temperature was warm enough. I let the water cascade down my body as I watch as slightly brown water goes down the drain. Once the water was relatively clear, I took a washcloth and soap and scrubbed my body thoroughly from the neck down. Once the soap was rinsed off, I turned the water off and grabbed a towel to dry off. Stepping out of the shower, I see that Rosie has left the new gown and socks on the counter. I put the gown on and struggled to tie the ties in the back. After finally getting the gown on right, I sit on the toilet seat lid to put on my socks. I stepped out of the bathroom to see that my parents made it here. My dad walked up to me with a pair of folded pajama bottoms and underwear, and said, “Well, I always said you were full of crap when you were a teenager, but I never meant literally.” My mom quickly shouted, “George!” Smiling at my dad trying to make light of an embarrassing situation, I said, “I'm surprised that my eyes haven’t turned brown yet.” With a chuckle, he handed me the pajamas and underwear, and I turned back around to head into the bathroom. Closing the door, I slipped on the underwear and as I was trying to guide my feet into the pajamas, I lost my balance. Like a sack of potatoes, I landed straight on my left shoulder and yelled out in pain, “MOTHERFUCKER!” As I am lying on the floor in pain, my dad comes rushing into the bathroom. “Will, are you alright!” my dad said in a scared voice. In an angry voice, I said, “Yeah, I just lost my damn balance trying to get dressed.” “Let me help you and get you into bed,” my dad said. My dad then put a hand under each of my armpits and lifted me from the floor to my feet. He then helped me pull my pajama bottoms up to my waist. We walked out of the bathroom with my dad having one of his arms wrapped around my torso, guiding me to the bed. Looking at the bed, I see that the covers are pulled back and there is an incontinence pad lying over the fitted sheet. Thinking to myself, ‘I guess they don’t want to chance it after my grand entrance,’ I get into bed and pull the covers over me, hearing a slight crinkle from the pad as I shift around to get comfortable. I looked around the hospital room and saw that it was not much different than the room at St. Luke’s. The room is a little bigger, and there is a couch that is up against the windows to my left, a recliner directly to my left that my mom is sitting in, and a straight-back chair to my right. As my dad was taking a seat on the couch, my mom said to me, “Will, I know you are not having a good day today. I just wanted to let you know that I called the math department and spoke to someone named Amy. I let her know what was going on and that you were at the Mayo Clinic. She said that she would talk to all your professors and let them know. She also told me not to worry about your assistantship either. Depending on how long it takes for you to get better, she said that we could do a medical withdrawal and you can return either this summer or fall if need be.” With a sigh of relief, I said, “OK,” pausing for a second, I asked, “What are you doing about work?” “I’m taking PTO right now, but if I have to, I can file for FMLA and get up to 12 weeks off. But don’t worry about me and since your father retired early last year, we plan on staying here until you are better. I already got Stanley to check on the house for us and get the mail. Just worry about you right now. OK,” my mom said. “OK,” I said. A few minutes later, Rosie walked in carrying a bag of fluids, a bag for my feeding tube, and a couple of syringes. Setting everything down on a small table to my left, she said, “Will, I’m going to start your noon feeding and start you back on fluids. How are your pain levels right now?” “The morphine is starting to wear off and it probably doesn’t help that I fell on my shoulder early,” I said. With a look of concern, she said, “You fell, what were you doing to fall?” I said, “I was trying to get dressed and lost my balance.” She then said, “I will be right back,” and walked out of the room. A minute later, Rosie was walking back in. “Will, with you falling earlier, I am going to have to classify you as a fall-risk patient. Can I see your left hand?” I held out my left hand and Rosie put a bright yellow plastic bracelet around my wrist with the words ‘FALL RISK’ written boldly on it. Rosie then said, “Please make sure someone is with you anytime you need to get out of bed. If your parents are not here, please press the call button and someone will be here as soon as possible.” I said, “OK.” Rosie then turned to my parents and said, “Please make sure you help Will with getting dressed, or me or another nurse could help. We do not want him to get hurt.” My mom responded, “Of course, his father will help from now on.” Rosie turned her attention back to the table of supplies and started to hang the I.V. fluid bag and feeding bag. She hooked the fluids to my I.V. and connected the feeding bag to my feeding tube. She then took the two syringes and injected them into my I.V. After throwing the two empty syringes away, Rosie said, “Your team of doctors should be seeing you in a couple of hours. Let me know if you need anything in the meantime.” On that note she walked out of the room and with the morphine taking full effect, I fell asleep. I woke up to my mom lightly shaking my shoulder and saying, “The doctors are here to see you.” I look at the foot of my bed and see three doctors. The first one is a woman who looks to be in her late thirties with long blonde hair and blue eyes. The second doctor is a tall man in his early forties, that looks to be Indian with short black hair and brown eyes. The third doctor is a short man with balding brown hair and brown eyes, that looks to be in his fifties. The Indian doctor spoke first and said, “I’m Dr. Kutner and I specialize in diagnostic medicine.” Pointing to the woman on his right, he said, “This is Dr. Cameron and she specializes in autoimmune diseases.” Pointing to the man on his left, he said, “And this is Dr. Taub and he specializes in genetics.” Dr. Cameron then asked, “Will, we have been reviewing your case and would like for you to go over your symptoms with us again.” I then spend the next ten minutes going over all my symptoms and what has happened to me over the past week. Dr. Kutner then said, “I'm going to do a physical exam of you, is that alright?” I said, “Sure.” He proceeded to listen to my heart and lungs and poke and prod all over my body. At the same time, Dr. Taub turned to my parents and said, “You all must be Will’s parents?” My mom responded, “Yes I’m Elana, and this is his father, George.” Dr. Taub said, “I wish we could be meeting under better circumstances, but it is nice to meet you all.” Dr. Kutner, now finishing his exam, stepped back and said, “Will, I not seeing anything abnormal in your physical exam and your lymph nodes feel normal which confirms that we are still most likely not dealing with an infection.” My dad asked, “What is the plan for figuring this out?” Dr. Kutner said, “We plan on drawing some blood samples today to begin running tests. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day for Will. He will have a full body CT scan and X-ray done, to see if anything changed since his last. He will also have an MRI of some key areas of his body and I will be performing a biopsy on a few of his joints tomorrow afternoon.” Dr. Cameron followed up with, “With the blood samples, I will start looking at other types of autoimmune diseases that Dr. Wilson could have missed and with tomorrow's tests, could shed light on which direction we should be looking in.” “With one of the blood samples, I will start sequencing Will’s DNA, and see if there are any genetic abnormalities that pop up. Hopefully, if there is anything to find, we can find it quickly, but with how large the human genome is, it could take some time,” Dr Taub said. “I will be supporting both Dr. Cameron and Dr. Taub, but I also will be exploring other avenues in trying to diagnose what is causing your symptoms. Do you have any questions?” Dr. Kutner said. I said, “No.” “Get some rest, Will, we will see you tomorrow,” Dr. Kutner replied. As they were walking out of my room, my mom said, “I feel better already after meeting the doctors.” My dad then said, “Yeah, it seems like they have a game plan together and are attacking this from all angles. How do you feel, Will?” I said, “Better, I still hope they figure this out quickly.” A moment later Rosie walked in carrying a caddy of empty vials, and what looked to be a needle and tourniquet. Walking over to the right side of my bed, she sat the caddy on the bed beside me and said, “Will, it seems that the doctors want a lot of blood samples, I’m going to draw blood from your right arm, OK.” I nodded and held out my arm and Rosie tied the tourniquet around my upper arm and began to draw vial after vial until the whole caddy was full of blood samples. After throwing the used needle and tourniquet away, Rosie said, “That should be the last of the blood samples that they would need today. I will be back at 6 to start the last of your feeding for the day and give you more morphine if you need it. Let me know if you need anything else before then.” Rosie walked out of my room with the caddy in hand and it did not take me long to fall back asleep. I woke up twice before the night, one to go to the bathroom with the help of my dad, and the other to get more morphine and the last feeding of the day. I fell back to sleep shortly after getting the morphine. I woke up to it being dark outside and my joints screaming in agony.

Chapter 21: Beyond My Imagination I wasn't in a hurry as I biked back home from Emma's place after saying my goodbyes and setting up a tentative plan for me to come over tomorrow afternoon. My feet pedaled slowly as my bike meandered down the side of the road, but my mind was racing. I simply couldn't get the image of Hannah's pull-ups out of my mind. It was one thing to see pictures of the pull-ups on all the advertisements I had spotted in magazines and newspapers. It was something entirely else to see what they looked like in person. And the pictures had not done them justice. I had been unable to take my eyes off Hannah every time her skirt had lifted up to reveal what she had euphemistically referred to as her absorbent underwear. I simply had to have them. Yes, I had managed to wait about three years so far, but even waiting another three days now felt nearly impossible. When I'd followed Emma up the driveway to her house, passing the spot where Hannah had seemed to have stopped and peed herself, the black pavement had been completely dry. I'd seen Hannah drink enough water that she must have had a sizeable accident, but the pull-up seemed to have been more than absorbent enough to handle it. While the size ranges listed in the ads for the pull-ups had suggested that I wouldn't have any issue fitting into them, there was now zero doubt that the pull-ups would work for me. I estimated that Hannah's pant sizes were one or two larger than mine. Any fears about having grown too big to wear the pull-ups were now fully assuaged. I was going to see Hannah one more time tomorrow, and then, who knew if our paths would ever cross again? If I had met her in any other way, if Hannah hadn't been my best friend's cousin, perhaps I could have discussed bedwetting with her, even in spite of the discomfort I felt around her weird behaviors. But that topic had to be off-limits with her. I didn't have any faith that Hannah would be able to keep that secret from Emma. Perhaps, like that time with my cousins all those years ago, I could corner Hannah for a bit while she was alone and see if I couldn't manage to dredge out some more details about her bedwetting, daytime accidents, and pull-ups. For the briefest of moments, I actually toyed again with the idea of wetting my pants during the day in front of my parents. There was no way that couldn't result in being required to wear pull-ups during the day like her. But I realized now that hiding that I was wearing pull-ups in the day would be incredibly difficult. Even if I avoided shorts, skirts, or other things that might make the pull-up become visible, the crinkling sound alone could be a dead giveaway to someone familiar with that sound. Time was running out quickly. I would need to get the pull-ups soon enough before my birthday so that I could prove to my parents that they worked. I needed them to allow me to have the sleepover, and I couldn't quit bedwetting now, not after all the progress that I had made. But with Mom's comments the other night about how she wasn't ever going to force me to wear diapers, I had no choice but to take the initiative if I was to ever get those pull-ups. As the bike ride home continued, I silently mouthed my way through a half-dozen different scenarios before I turned to pull into the driveway, desperately searching for the magic phrase that, if used on my parents, would convince them to purchase pull-ups for me without any hesitation. But none of my arguments felt quite right. I had to find good excuses for the questions I was asking. It couldn't be that I was asking for pull-ups out of the blue. I had to have an explanation for what inspired the request. The only thing I'd settled on so far was that the movie we had watched the other night would be the ideal way to open up the discussion; I could act as though that had given me the idea that this was even something that could be done to handle bedwetting. But how to get from that to the specific bedwetting pull-ups that I wanted to wear? I suddenly had an idea. Once I was back in the driveway, I tapped in the five-digit code to open the garage door so I could put my bike away. When I entered the couch from the garage, which led right into the kitchen, I ran across Mom prepping something for dinner. She was hunched over a cutting board in the corner of the room. "Mom," I asked, "I didn't have a chance to finish that newest Reader's Digest? Where did you put it?" She answered without looking up from her work, though she did stop chopping with her knife. "It's in the basket next to the couch." I retrieved my prize and retreated to my bedroom. With the door closed behind me, I flipped rapidly through the tiny magazine until, at last, I came across the advertisement I had seen earlier in the week. My parents knew that these pull-ups were an option. But they were so adamantly against them that they had even gone to the length of reassuring me that they wouldn't make me wear them. Was it simply that they thought I didn't want to wear them? Had my sister perhaps reacted negatively to the suggestion of wearing pull-ups a long time ago? If that was the explanation, perhaps all I had to do was indicate to my parents that I would be OK with trying out the pull-ups. But even then, I had to go about it in the right way. I couldn't have my parents thinking that I wanted to wear those pull-ups, but perhaps I could frame it as wanting to go on a sleepover so badly that I'd be willing to try anything to make it happen, even something I wasn't keen on, such as pull-ups. That could do. That could be a successful angle of attack. I would use the movie we had watched the other night as an opening to bring up the topic of diapers, then I would conveniently mention the ad I had seen in the magazine. I'd have to make sure I didn't sound thrilled about the idea, but if I could come across as desperately willing to try anything so that I could have the sleepover, that surely had to be enough to win my parents over. But first, I needed to wait until the pills had run their course. Two more nights of wetting the bed should do the trick for that. Then, once the doctor's appointment was over, I would make my move. Perhaps, if I was lucky enough, the doctor would bring up the idea of pull-ups unprompted. I breathed a sigh of relief and flopped backward onto the bed, stretching out on my back. I didn't mind the crinkling sound that the new mattress made. It reminded me in a way of how the pull-ups had sounded when I had been wearing them three years ago and of the sounds I had heard all yesterday afternoon when Hannah had been walking or running next to me. Everything would be simple once my parents were buying pull-ups for me. Continuing the ruse of bedwetting would be as easy as peeing in a pull-up most nights, rather than the charade of going down to the basement after midnight to toss in my bedding. And there would be no need to fake that I was having headaches from the anti-bedwetting pills in the morning. For times when I was away from home – whether for sleepovers or for the soccer camp I'd have later in the summer — I could leave whatever pull-ups were packed with me safe in the bottom of my suitcase, letting my parents think that the bedwetting issue was resolved without actually needing to risk having anyone discover my secret. And I wouldn't have to wet the bed every night. I could allow for a few nights a week when I would remain dry, but then I could save those unused pull-ups to be used during the day to continue the experiments I wanted to conduct with wetting my pants while I was awake. And I'd have the house all to myself to do that. <><><> My nighttime routine followed the same pattern as the past couple of days. My water intake was heavily monitored. I wasn't given quite as much to drink after dinner and only was allowed a small amount to sip on afterward. I made up for it by drinking from my tap-water filled bottle in my bedroom. And I was again given the anti-bedwetting pills. Mom stayed in the room, watching as I placed them in my mouth and washed them down with a small glass of water. I had considered the idea of faking that I had taken the pills and just flushing them down the toilet, but that wasn't possible with how she had stuck around to make sure I had actually taken my medication. If I could have avoided taking the pills, that would have allowed me to wet the bed normally. Mom again reminded me that I was to not drink anything more than the tiniest sip of water now that I had taken the pills. The sternness of the warning was such that there wasn't any scenario where I was going to disobey her. And then there was the reminder to use the toilet before bed. With Mom and Grace around when that reminder was given, there was no way to fake using the toilet, either. All of that meant that there wasn't any way I was going to be able to actually pee in the bed tonight. That was a supreme disappointment. It felt like forever since the last time I had actually peed myself, though in reality, only a little more than a day had passed since I had intentionally wet my pants while in the laundry room on Friday afternoon. I weighed my options: toss everything in the washing machine tonight or wet the bed when I woke up in the morning. As much as I didn't want to deal with having to take my wet bedding down to the basement in the morning, the urge to sleep was irresistible. <><><> The prediction of Sunday being a rainy day turned out to be correct. As Grace was out with her friends, Mom drove me over to Emma's place. I had woken up to an actual headache this morning, and for once I didn't have to fake how miserable I was feeling until the Tylenol kicked in. I didn't have any issues with getting myself to pee when I woke up, and I found myself once again lying in a puddle of urine in my bed for about twenty minutes until I decided that it was time to head downstairs. I nearly managed to take my bedding to the laundry room without running into anyone, only to have Grace unexpectedly pop out around the corner after I had gone down the stairs to the basement. I had attempted to at least wrap up my sheets so that the wet spots weren't visible on the outside, but in my surprise at coming across my older sister in the basement, I dropped everything I was holding, and the sheets unraveled to reveal the spots where they had gotten soaked with urine. That had led to an awkward moment as I scrambled to pick up the evidence of my wet bed while Grace awkwardly excused herself to head past me and go upstairs. "How are you holding up?" Mom asked, once I had gotten into the car. She was all buckled with the key in the ignition, but she hadn't taken the car out of park yet. "Fine." "How's your head doing?" "Better." Mom sighed. "We've got your doctor's appointment setup first thing Monday morning. I'm sure they will be able to figure out what might be causing the bedwetting you've been dealing with." "It better be something that doesn't give me headaches in the morning." "Just one more night of the pills, and I won't make you take any more if they don't work, OK?" I nodded in response, and Mom finally shifted the minivan into reverse and backed out of the driveway. The drive over to Emma's place was quick, and nothing further was said about the bedwetting or the doctor's appointment. Mom pulled up as far as she could in my friend's driveway, so that I would have to be out in the rain for long. <><><> Hannah was wearing another Harry Potter-themed shirt this afternoon. It made me begin to wonder if she had anything else in her wardrobe. She was already holding open the front door for me as soon as I was getting out of the passenger side of the minivan. I managed to not get completely soaked during my short sprint up the front steps and into the house. I had wondered if it would be difficult for me to tell if Hannah was wearing a pull-up today since, from Emma's tale about how Hannah had peed on the couch, it seemed as though she didn't necessarily wear them all the time. But it became obvious right away that Hannah was wearing a pull-up. Her Harry Potter T-shirt barely made it down to her waist. She was fine if she was just standing still, but as soon as she reached up to hold the door open, the shirt lifted up to reveal about an inch of the pull-up sticking out above her loose-fitting shorts. "We're all set. Emma helped me get the movie set up on the TV," Hannah said as soon as the door shut behind me. "This is all your fault," Emma muttered to me after Hannah had raced off toward the family room where the TV was located without waiting for a response from me. "What is all my fault?" I asked as I slipped out of my shoes. "I'd finally managed to convince her that I wasn't interested in Harry Potter, and then you had to encourage her yesterday and she hasn't shut up about it since. She's already gotten through the first two movies this morning. All she's done today is sit in front of the TV." I followed Emma toward the family room. I said hello to Emma's mom on the way over. She was talking with two people who I assumed were Hannah's Mom and Dad. "Does Hannah have any siblings?" I asked Emma. "No. Thank goodness," Emma said. "I couldn't handle more than one of her." Hannah was sitting in the middle of the room in front of the couch when Emma and I walked in. Her eyes were already glued to the TV, where the movie adaptation of the third Harry Potter book was queued up to start. I figured this wouldn't be so bad. I didn't enjoy the movies as much as the books, but they were still a fun way to pass the time. And it would certainly beat the interrogation I had gotten from Hannah yesterday afternoon. But I wasn't even able to enjoy the movie. Hannah didn't seem to have the ability to stay quiet for long. She was constantly talking over the movie, either sharing trivia about it or commenting on how she didn't like some parts that weren't similar to the book. Emma was instead focused intently on her phone. I could see her scrolling through TikTok from the corner of my eye. She didn't even have her headphones in, either. Even though the volume was set low, I could also hear the annoying music from whatever she was watching. I found myself picking absentmindedly at my nails again. I was getting really annoyed. All I wanted to do was watch the movie in peace and quiet. I found my eyes drifting downward to where Hannah was sitting in front of me. Her shirt wasn't doing a good job of hiding the pull-up. Even though I had previously foresworn the idea of looking for her pull-ups at Emma's house, and even though I was on track to potentially have pull-ups of my own in a few days, I couldn't help but want to get my hands on some as soon as possible. Every warning I had given myself about it being too much of a risk was washed away by an intense, uncontrollable urge to find and put on one of Hannah's pull-ups. I wanted nothing more than to put one on, and I simply couldn't wait any longer. All I needed was to find the right excuse to have a chance to explore Emma's bedroom upstairs. If that is where Hannah was sleeping every night, there had to be pull-ups in her luggage there. We were forty-five minutes into the movie when it was interrupted by the now-familiar sound of Hannah's watch going off. "Pause it," Hannah yelled to her cousin as she went off toward the bathroom. I realized right then that this was my chance to do a little exploring. With the bathroom on the main floor occupied, I had an excuse to head upstairs to the other bathroom there. "I really need to go, too," I said as I stood up from the couch. "I'm going to run upstairs." Emma nodded silently, but didn't look away from her phone. The layout of Emma's house was exactly the same as mine, as if the company that had developed our neighborhood had simply hit copy and paste hundreds of times as the homes were built. But that also meant that I knew where everything was. I hadn't completely lied to Emma. I did need to pee slightly, but not nearly so badly as to need to rush all the way upstairs to do so. What I wanted to do was take a look in Hannah's suitcase, which I assumed would be in Emma's bedroom, where Hannah had been sleeping on the floor. But first, there was something I wanted to check in the upstairs bathroom. After arriving upstairs, I discreetly peeked into each of the bedrooms, confirming that I was completely alone. I set a timer on my phone to make sure I remembered to head back downstairs in a reasonable amount of time. I stepped into the bathroom and sat down on the toilet without lifting up the cover and cautiously opened up the lid to the trash can set next to it. At the top of the pile of garbage were a half-dozen wet wipes and one of the bedwetting pull-ups Hannah had been wearing the other day. The pull-up hadn't been rolled up particularly well. I could see inside it easily. The previously white padding had expanded and turned yellow. I wondered how frequently she was having accidents. But what caught my eye was what was beneath the pull-up. I shook the trashcan a little so that the pull-up moved away to the side. No way was I actually going to be reaching in to touch anything. Underneath the pull-up was a diaper, one different from anything I had seen before. One thing was immediately clear. This was not a baby diaper. That was obvious because it didn't have any of the colorful designs that had been on the diapers my younger brother had worn. There were no pictures of smiling animals or cartoon characters wearing their own diapers. Instead, the diaper was mostly white. The one similarity it shared with the baby diapers Jackson had worn was that there was a wetness indicator running down the middle, and if I was reading it correctly, the diaper had most certainly been wet before it had been discarded. But there were other signs as well. Unlike every diaper and pull-up I had seen before, the material of the diaper didn't appear soft. There was a silky-smooth plastic look to it. I wondered what it would feel like, but couldn't bring myself to touch it. The most obvious sign that this wasn't a baby diaper was how large it was. There was no way this would have fit on a baby – and there weren't any in this house. This had to be a diaper for someone my own age. For Hannah. In a single moment, all the questions I still had from yesterday had been answers, and another million ones had been created. I hadn't known what to make of Emma's statement that Hannah's mom had to help her daughter put on a diaper for bed. It didn't seem as though putting on a pull-up would be too challenging, even considering Hannah's disabilities, but I could see how a tape-on diaper would require assistance. Emma's comment about thinking Hannah should have been put back into diapers during the day after the accident on the couch was also brought into a new light. Had she been insinuating that her cousin should have been wearing these diapers during the day as well, rather than her pull-ups? I listened closely as I continued to stare down into the garbage bin. The stairs in Emma's house were as noisy as the ones at my place, so I would have ample alert if anyone was to come upstairs after me, but I hadn't heard the telltale signs of footsteps. I slipped out of the bathroom, trying to walk softly down the hallway so that everyone below me wouldn't realize how much I was wandering around. The door to Emma's bedroom had been left open. Unlike me or my sister, she didn't do much to protect her privacy. A whiff of a strange scent hit me as I stepped into the bedroom. I paused while I tried to consider what it was. Emma had complained about how her bedroom smelled like pee because of her cousin's bedwetting. Was that what I was smelling? That brought an immediate rush of embarrassment and concern. Despite the efforts I had taken to freshen up my room with fabric sprays, is this what my bedroom smelled like? Had I simply not noticed it before? And would Emma be able to tell the next time she came to my house? I was sick with worry for a moment, but those concerns dropped away as soon as I laid eyes on what was obviously Hannah's suitcase up against the wall, next to a balled-up sleeping bag and pillow. The suitcase was already unzipped, and there was a pile of dirty laundry sitting next to it. To no surprise, a lot of the clothing was Harry Potter themed. I pushed aside the guilt of prying into Hannah's personal belongings and lifted up the lid to the suitcase. I found what I was looking for right away. There were more than a dozen pull-ups tucked along the side of the suitcase. But that isn't what drew my interest. Instead, there were nearly a dozen diapers matching the ones I had come across in the bathroom. I pulled one of the two diapers out of the suitcase. It crinkly loudly in my hands, much more so than a pull-up. I gently unfolded it, taking a peek at the interior padding that was far more extensive. All I could think about was how it must be able to absorb an incredible amount of pee without leaking. It was simply beyond anything I could have thought to imagine. I'd never once seen the remotest hint that a product like this could exist in all the advertisements I'd perused over the past three years. I checked the timer on my phone. Only seven minutes left. There simply wasn't enough time. I had to set aside all my thoughts about the diapers for now and do what I had come upstairs to do. I reluctantly set the diaper back into the suitcase, which was exactly where I had found it. Taking a diaper simply wasn't an option. I didn't have enough time to figure out how to get it on. But I would have no issues with putting on a pull-up myself. Besides, I as attempted to remember, that was what I had come up here for in the first place. I was torn momentarily between the two designs – one with pastel stripes and one with floral pattern – before finally deciding to grab the one with the stripes. I tip-toed back to the bathroom, pull-up in hand. I looked at my phone again as I entered the bathroom. I had initially given myself thirteen minutes. Being in upstairs much longer than that would only risk making Emma and her family get suspicious. I still had six minutes left. After double-checking that the bathroom door was indeed locked, I hastily stripped off my pants and underwear, my hands shaking as I did so. My disappointment at not being able to try on the diaper melted away as soon as I began to stretch out the sides of the pull-up as I prepared to put it on. Three years. How had so much time gone by so quickly? I was once again holding a pull-up in my hands, and it felt as though no time had passed at all since I had last done so. Only this time, the pull-up was perfect for me. This was one meant for teen girls. The pull-up slid up my legs just like a regular pair of underwear, except that it felt entirely different once I had it on. It was as if I was reliving the best dream of my life. Each moment replayed itself like those scenes from years ago that I had worked so hard to re-capture. I examined myself in the mirror. The fit was perfect. All my worries about the pull-up not working for me had been for nothing. But time was slipping by way too fast. I couldn't hide away in the bathroom forever, but I couldn't stand the thought of having to remove the pull-up after only having had it on for a few minutes. Could I get away with wearing the pull-up back to my place? I put my underwear and leggings back on over the pull-up. My leggings at least rose up enough on my waist to easily cover the waistband so I wouldn't be exposing myself like Hannah had. I turned around, examining the outline of my bottom in the mirror. If only I had thought things through and worn an outfit that could actually have covered up my bottom, perhaps I could have risked wearing it. But there wasn't any way to hide the outline of the padding beneath my leggings, even if this outfit seemed to have somewhat reduced the crinkling sound. Defeated, I removed my leggings and underwear a second time. The timer on my phone now said that there were four minutes remaining. I ran my hands all over the outside of the pull-up, mesmerized by the crinkling sound, the way it hugged my waist, and the feel of the padding between my legs. It was exactly as I had remembered. It was so completely perfect. I wanted nothing more than to see what it would feel like to wet the pull-up, but there was no way to get away with doing so. An extra pull-up in the trashcan would risk raising some awkward questions, and I couldn't think of any way to discard the pull-up discreetly after peeing in it. I let another couple of minutes pass as I stood in the bathroom, anxiously watching the timer on my phone continue to count down. It was over all too soon. I removed the pull-up carefully, making sure not to rip any of the sides, and checked that the inside padding had remained clean. I folded the pull-up back up the way it had come out of the suitcase and tucked it back into place. I managed to hit the pause button on my timer three seconds before it went off. I hurried back downstairs, hoping that my absence hadn't been so long as to raise any questions. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Introduction What would happen if, no matter how old you are, your parents found your stash? Well, on an already miserable day, that’s exactly what happened to Tom. How will both he and his dad handle it? Chapter 1 - Rejection ‘Well, thank you for coming in today, myself and the panel will discuss the interview and the recruiter will get back to you in due course’. Tom could see in the eyes of the interviewer it was going to be another rejection. He couldn’t understand it, just over a year ago he’d graduated with a 2:1 in Architecture. He thought he’d walk into a job, but he’d applied to every company he could find, and had 15 interviews never getting further than the second round. He couldn’t understand it, what was he doing wrong? Whatever it was it wasn’t how he presented himself. He looked gorgeous in his grey slim fit suit and smart tan shoes. He is 5’9, short jet black hair, with beautiful bright blue eyes, but I guess it’s what you say in interview which is important, not how you look. He stood up, grabbed his posh leather bag his dad had gotten him for his graduation, shook the panel’s hands and made his way out into the busy London street. No sooner had he stepped out the building a rough looking man bumped into him with a cigarette burning a hole right into the shoulder. ‘Hey!’ said Tom. ‘Fuck off, prick’ cursed the man as he hurried on. It was the final straw, a tear rolled down Tom’s face. He couldn’t take much more of life at this point. Everything was falling apart, or that’s how it felt. 23, no job, no friends who are local, his mum has passed away and he’s still living with his grieving dad Steve. After travelling back by train Tom let himself into the house and rushed straight upstairs to his room. ‘How’d the interview go?’ called his Dad from his study. ‘Crap’ shouted back Tom. Once in the room he started to undress. He hung up his suit jacket and inspected the burn. Maybe it could be repaired? Probably not, now he doesn’t even have a suit if he gets another interview. Nevertheless he took off the trousers and placed the suit in its special bag like always, before putting it in the wardrobe. He grabbed his joggers and a t-shirt and turned to lay on his bed, but as he did, he saw something which made his blood run cold. Could this day get any worse? His worst nightmare was lying in front of him. His heart thumped in his chest as if it was about to exit it. His face flushed red, sweat started to bead on his forehead, panic started to set in. Lying there in front of him was one of his adult nappies, and on it a note. “Hey son, let’s talk, love Dad”. Tom had bought these nappies a few months back from a medical supply company whilst his Dad had been away for work. He’d been interested in them for a while. He’d enjoyed the few he’d tried but he’d not had the courage to wear them once his dad got back. He’d hidden them under his bed in a carrier bag, but clearly his dad had found them. He couldn’t believe it, how could this happen? For an hour he sat there thinking of excuses he could make, plausible stories he could tell. “They’re not mine”. “I’ve been having bedwetting problems”, “I…” none of them seemed convincing. He didn’t feel like he could leave the room. After at least an hour and a half his dad called ‘dinner!’ Heart thumping and head racing he made his way down the stairs. He was physically shaking. When he saw his Dad at the table, he froze. ‘So you don’t think they’ll ask you back?’ asked his Dad. ‘No’ Tom tried to say, but nothing came out. ‘No’ he said eventually in his third attempt. ‘Sit down it’s getting cold’ said his Dad gesturing to Toms dinner. Tom made his way over and sat down in silence. For a short while they both ate, but Tom really wasn’t hungry, if anything he felt sick. He just shuffled his food around. When his dad had finished he reached out and put his had on Tom’s. ‘Talk to me Tom’ he said gently, trying to make eye contact. Tom was physically shaking, he couldn’t speak, he was living his worst nightmare. His Dad lent across to him. ‘I found your nappies mate’ he said. Just hearing that out loud drove through Tom like a train. ‘They’re not mine’ he blurted out. It was like a reflex, he heard himself say it, but he didn’t think he’d actually processed what he was going to say yet. His dad gave him a soft smile. ‘I know they’re yours son’. He said softly. ‘Tell me why’ he asked. Tom put his shaking hands over his eyes, tears now starting to well up. ‘Please talk to me son’. ‘I’m sorry Dad, I’m such a failure. I’ve got no friends, I don’t have any hobbies, I can’t get a job, I’m going nowhere. I’m a disappointment. If mum were alive she’d be heartbroken at what a useless adult I’ve become’. ‘Oh don’t be silly’ said his Dad. ‘You’re going through a tough time, I know, we both are, but you have your whole life ahead of you. You’re only 23’ Tom couldn’t look at his Dad, he still had his hands over his eyes. ‘I just wish things were like years ago, when mum was alive, when I was carefree and….happy’ sobbed Tom. ‘Is that why you bought the nappies?’ His dad asked gently. ‘I dunno, I dunno why I bought them’ said Tom regretfully. ‘Do they take you back, to a happy place? Are they a stress reliever for you or something?’ His dad enquired. ‘I guess so, I’m sorry, I’ll throw them away, please don’t think I’m a weirdo or a sicko dad, please’ said Tom. ‘I don’t, I understand, if they relax you and you want to wear them that’s fine. I wore them myself for a bit when I was your age’. Tom immediately pulled his face out of his hands. That was an unexpected sentence. ‘What?’ Said Tom in shock. ‘I wore nappies as a stress reliever, to regress for a few years, never did me any harm, better than drugs or booze’. Said his dad dismissively. Tom didn’t know what to say, he just stared at his dad in shock, and in a strange sense, relief. His dad got up and gestured to Tom to get up and give him a hug. Tom obliged, got up and put his arms around his Dad. ‘You’re still shaking’ he said. ‘This might be the perfect time for one of those nappies’. Chapter 2 - Relief When Tom went back into his room the nappy was still there laying on the bed. Half of him desperately wanted to put it on the other half wanted to throw it out the window. Eventually the half that wanted to wear it won out and he started to unfurl it. After he’d just had permission to hadn’t he? He slowly pulled down his joggers, pulled down his boxers and sat himself on the nappy. He laid back for a moment and stared at the ceiling. “What am I doing?” He repeated to himself, but his desire to carry on pushed through and he slowly and carefully applied the 4 tapes of his Tena Maxi adult nappy. He slowly closed his legs. The nappy popped and crinkled as it resisted. The feeling was amazing, he could feel the stress of this bizarre day drain away. After a while his dad called up. ‘You can come down you know, I want to watch Traitors’. Tom and his Dad had been watching it on catchup together each evening. Tom stood up, his nappy crinkling, not overly loudly, but noticeably in a quiet room. He pulled the joggers over it and looked in the mirror. It wasn’t noticeable from the front. He made his way down and quickly sat in the chair, so his dad couldn’t notice or tell. Tom was hugely into the Traitors on TV, but his mind was elsewhere tonight. As his dad commented on it, he just managed the occasional “yeah” instead of the usual debate. Eventually it finished and his dad switched off the TV. He looked across at Tom expectantly. ‘So did you put one on?’ He asked. Tom paused for a moment. ‘Yeah’ he said shyly. ‘Feel better now?’ asked his Dad. Tom breathed out slowly. ‘Yeah, I guess I do’. He said eventually. ‘Good’ said his dad. If that’s all it takes to relax you, just wear them son, I won’t judge. ‘Can I ask a practical question though?’ ‘What?’ asked Tom uncertain. ‘Do you, wet yourself?’ His dad asked plainly. ‘No!’ exclaimed Tom, as if it was a ridiculous question. He’d worn three on his own, and it had not remotely occurred to him to wet them. It was just the feeling of the bulk he liked. He wasn’t about to start wetting himself! ‘I mean, it’s not a crazy thing to ask Tom’ his Dad said. ‘You’re wearing a nappy and I ask if you wet yourself’. There was an awkward pause. ‘Well, if you do have an accident, I’ll put some bin bags in your room. Take it off, ball it up, put it in the bag, tie it up and put it outside your door, I’ll get rid of it. Don’t put it in the bins in the house, they can smell after a bit’. ‘Oh for god sake dad, I don’t wet myself!’ Repeated Tom as he got up to leave the room. ‘Hey’ called his dad grabbing his arm. ‘Don’t walk off on me, I’m being understanding and supportive. ‘It was a perfectly reasonable question and I wanted to make sure we have a plan for it’. ‘I know, sorry Dad, it’s just weird that’s all’ said Tom genuinely. ‘I guess I’m just embarrassed, y’know’. ‘Yeah I get that son, wearing a nappy is embarrassing, but it’s nothing to be ashamed of, people wear them for all sorts of reasons. As long as they’re helping you, it’s all good, I’m proud of you for talking to me about it at all and doing what makes you happy. I don’t think I could have handled it so well with my dad if he ever found mine’. Tom thought to ask his Dad if he ever wet his nappies, but it just felt too weird. Chapter 3 - The bathroom problem Tom stood in the bathroom cleaning his teeth, then habitually turned to the toilet to do a wee before getting into bed. As he went to grab it his hand slammed into his pad, not his boxers, opps. He reached inside and tried to pull it out the top, but he’s not that well endowed and it wouldn’t reach well enough even with the nappy pulled right down, he’d just pee all over himself. He tucked himself back down, squatted and reached into a leg guard. The guard was tight, but he managed to get the head out and point it to the toilet. He tried to go, but the pressure of the leg guard was stopping the flow. He squatted even more, and eventually wee squirted out, some in the loo, some up the wall and some in the bath. It was very awkward, and it had made a huge mess, but eventually he was done. He hurriedly started to clean up bathroom. Once in his room, he dropped his joggers, took off his t-shirt and looked at himself in the mirror. Like before, half of him thought he looked good with the nappy on, the other half thought he looked like a freak. For a moment he planned to take it off, but ultimately decided against it, he didn’t have many, he didn’t have any money and he didn’t want to waste it. He pulled on his pjs over the top of it. It took a while before he fell asleep, the feel of the nappy seemed somewhat overwhelming. It was keeping him awake, but eventually he did drop of. … He looked over at the clock with one eye, 3:10am. He woke up for a wee at this time every night. For a split second he thought about going in his nappy, but it was just a second. He made his way to the bathroom, where exactly the same thing happened as earlier, except worse, because this time he was half asleep. Like before he hurriedly cleaned up, to what he thought was a good standard, and made his way back to bed. … The following morning, he woke as usual and made his way downstairs. ‘Jam on toast?’ asked his Dad? ‘Yes please’ said Tom still a little sleepy. As his Dad made breakfast, he turned to Tom. ‘Ok, here’s something I gotta say’. He said. ‘If you’re going to wear those nappies in my house, I’d much rather you wee in it and cleanly dispose of it, than wee all over the bathroom’ he said waving the butter knife. ‘Sorry, I thought I cleared up’ said Tom in a bit of a panic. ‘I just need some practice, sorry’. ‘Tom’s’ dad turned around. ‘If you want to wear, but still use the loo. I’ll get you some pull-ups, but if you’re in those it’s just not really practical, unless you remove it, which of course pretty much ruins it. Tom thought again about asking his dad if he’d wet his, but like before it just felt odd and creepy to ask his dad that. ‘I’ll try sitting next time’ said Tom. Chapter 4 - A Subscription! It may surprise you to know that after his shower that day Tom put on regular underpants. He’d had his fill, in fact for the next 2 days, no more nappy and it was only mentioned a couple of times by his dad, gently enquiring whether he was wearing one or not. That doesn’t mean Tom hadn’t thought about what had happened virtually every waking minute. It was just that after the initial rush it just felt too awkward to go about his normal daily routine at home, in front of his dad, with a nappy on. That initial confidence had been lost. Tom was at his computer at about 11am, his Dad was in his study downstairs working. He’s a self employed accountant, he works from home most days, only occasionally going into the city to meet a client. There was a knock at the door. “Sign here please mate” Tom heard the delivery driver say, before several thud sounds. Tom made his way down curiously. In the hall his Dad was positioning 3 large boxes. ‘What you ordered?’ asked Tom. His dad stepped back with a big proud grin. ‘Open one’ he said. Tom stepped forward and pulled the tape off of the box on top and flapped it open. ‘Nappies!?!’ He said in shock. ‘Why have you ordered nappies?’ Tom said with a look of confusion on his face. ‘Because you told me you like to wear them, so I’ve ordered you them for you.’ Tom looked at the huge pile. 21 per pack, 3 in a box, 3 boxes. 189 nappies! ‘Well how many are you expecting me to get through?’ He asked incredulously. ‘I don’t know, but you save on delivery if you spend over £80 and get 10% off if you sign up for a subscription, so I got 3 cases’. ‘A subscription!’ Tom said almost shouting. ‘It’s ok, I can cancel it, there’s no commitment’ said his dad waving it off. ‘Look they’re there if you want one. You feel stressed, or just want one they are there. Take a pack up to your room, I’ll store the rest in the spare room’. Tom walked up to his room carrying his bag of nappies. He couldn’t decide what he thought about it. It had been great that his dad hadn’t freaked out, it had been a huge relief his dad was so supportive, but buying him 3 cases without asking? As Tom looked at the nappies in the pack on his bed next to him, he had an odd feeling. He wanted to put one on of course, but he also now felt this uncomfortable expectation from his that he would, and that if he didn’t his dad be oddly disappointed that he’d wasted his money. He put the pack to one side and made his way downstairs. He tapped on his dad’s study door. ‘I’ve got to ask dad, why have you ordered me three cases of nappies without asking me if I want them?’ His dad turned around on his office chair and took off his reading glasses. ‘Because son, if I’d have asked if you wanted me to order them you’d have said no, and I know you want them deep down. You can’t afford them, and you’d not order when I’m here even if you could, so I just ordered them for you. Save you the anxiety. You’re under no obligation, they’re there if you want them’. Chapter 5 - No obligation Tom’s days were not as full as they could be. He’d get up, have breakfast and then go on the job hunting sites. If there was anything to apply for, he’d apply for it. Generally though he was done by lunchtime and scratching around for something to do. Today was one of those days, he’d applied for one job, he didn’t really like the sound of it, but it was that or apply for nothing. He went over to the pack of nappies that had just arrived and pealed them open. They were the same make as the ones he’d bought, but these were the highest absorbency ‘Ultima’ version. He pulled one out, and held it. Just holding it in his hand gave him a buzz. He un furled it and felt the contrast been the smooth plastic outer shell and soft padded inside. It gave him a magical, warm and excited feeling inside. He slowly pulled down his jeans, then his boxers and laid himself on the bed. Slowly and carefully he pulled the nappy up snuggly between his legs and securely taped it on. Instantly the day went from empty and dull to a whirlwind of emotion. He no longer felt bored, he felt excited. The nappy, that his own dad had bought him no less, sat comfortably and reassuringly between his legs. He reached down and felt it. The bulk was considerable, his man parts locked away beneath the thick padding. He laid on his bed in just his t-shirt and nappy, just enjoying the moment for a while, before lifting himself up from his dreamlike state to stand. The nappy pushed between his legs. As his walked over to his mirror he could feel its presence with every step. He looked at himself in the mirror. He liked what he saw, he thought it looked both cute and smart all at the same time. … “Knock-knock” ‘Hi son I’m done, fancy a walk?’ Called his dad through the door. Tom dived to the floor to grab his jeans and then tried to pull them on in a panic. As he did, his door started to open. Before long he was standing there in front of his dad, trousers half up in a t-shirt and nappy. ‘Ah, you tried one’ said his dad. ‘Like em?’ ‘Err yeah’ said Tom. ‘A bit thicker’ ‘Yeah, I thought well, if you do wet yourself, these will last you a bit longer’. Replied his dad. Tom didn’t know how to reply to that. His instinct was to say ‘I don’t wet myself’ like before, but in truth he was thinking about giving it a go, given how difficult it was to use the loo. ‘I can’t go for a walk in this’ said Tom, pointing to his nappy. ‘Why?’ asked his dad. ‘Err, why do you think?’ Replied Tom. ‘No, genuinely Tom I don’t know why’ his dad replied. ‘Tell me’ ‘People will notice!!’ said Tom. ‘Who’s going to notice?’ said his dad incredulously. ‘You can’t tell it’s there under clothes’ he said confused. ‘It’s a private thing, no one knows what underwear you’ve got on, get over yourself’. Tom finished buttoning up his jeans. They were actually a little tight with his Tena Ultima nappy underneath. ‘I’m going to take it off’ he said as he started unbuttoning again. ‘Right’ said his dad authoritatively. ‘I’m supportive, but to a point. I won’t have piss all over the bathroom and I’m not having you waste nappies by putting them on, then just taking them off again moments later. They’re expensive. Do up your bloody trousers and stop being silly’ Tom didn’t really know what to say. He stopped unbuttoning. ‘Does it really not show?’ ‘No son, it doesn’t’. Now come on it’s a nice day, let’s get some fresh air. … As Tom walked along the bulk of the nappy was present with every step. Both he and his dad were fast walkers, but in his nappy and tight jeans he was struggling to keep up a little. It was a beautiful day. They went to the park, had an ice cream and on the way back walked past the local pub. ‘Fancy a cheeky pint?’ Asked his dad. They often went into the pup together. ‘Yeah, why not’ said Tom. They both had a couple of pints before it was time to leave. They didn’t talk about Toms nappy at all, mostly about the Traitors on TV. ‘Ok, I’m going to pop to the loo and then we’ll head off’ said his Dad. ‘Ah yeah, me too’ said Tom. His dad stopped and looked at him. ‘You do make me laugh, why are you doing it to yourself? You can’t wee all over the floor in a public bathroom, it’s rude and disrespectful’. Tom looked at him, kinda accepting that he had a point. Whilst it felt so crazy to wet himself, as his dad became more accepting and as Tom was waddling around in the nappy anyway, it felt increasingly silly to not use it for what it was designed for. ‘The thing is son’ said his dad. ‘They deteriorate after 4-6 hours anyway, so you gotta change it whether you use it or not, you may as well use it. Tom stood and waited whilst his dad went to the loo. He was breaking his neck, but he couldn’t go. Something in his brain was telling him no. He couldn’t just wet himself right there in the middle of the pub! As they walked back, Tom was getting increasingly desperate and his dad noticed. Tom was walking quicker and quicker and couldn’t stop grabbing his crotch. His bladder felt like it was going to burst. ‘Stop walking a minute’ said his dad, stopping himself. Tom stopped, the urge unbearable. ‘If you don’t let it go you’ll hurt your kidneys. That’s what I did, it was agony for days. That’s why I’m trying to help you. Just go, you don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me’ With that Tom’s bladder burst, right there in the street. Wee poured uncontrollably into his nappy. He stared desperately at his jeans in the full expectation that wee would be pouring down them, but it was not. What he could feel though was his nappy expanding and getting larger and tighter in his jeans. After what felt like forever, he stopped. ‘Come on then’ said his said. As Tom walked on the nappy felt completely different to before. It was much much bulkier, oddly to him though it didn’t feel at all wet. It had clearly absorbed all the wee and left him dry, which was pretty amazing actually, who’d have thought they’d work so well? It felt so strange yet at the same time so comforting to have had an accident and been protected by his nappy. It also made him feel small, having just stood there in front of his dad and wet himself. As they walked along his dad turned to him and chuckled. ‘So I guess that answers my question. You do wet yourself.’ Chapter 6 - Something awkward Over the next few days Tom had worn a nappy on and off, even when wearing all but a couple of very carefully managed wees has been in the toilet, with great difficulty. He was really conflicted about whether to wear one or not. Even though his dad was fine with it, almost encouraging it, he was still embarrassed to talk about it, and felt a little silly with it on. Things had been reasonably normal. His dad had enquired occasionally as to the state of his nappy, but it wasn’t often. Just things like. “If you’re wet son, don’t forget to change regularly”. His dad had also bought him some powders and creams and impressed upon him the importance of good skin care and hygiene. “Wearing nappies isn’t dirty or gross son, but you do need to up your game on hygiene and skin care” he’d said. … As they sat and watched tv that evening, Tom decided he’d do a wee in his nappy. He stood and after a few odd movements he started to wet himself. ‘Good lad, I notice you’re getting better at that’ said his dad. Tom stood a while longer until he’d finished, then sat back down in his now wet nappy and finally said something that was increasingly bothering him. ‘Dad’ he said. ‘Can I ask you something really awkward?’ His dad switched off the tv and looked at him with suspicion. ‘Okaaay’ he said slowly, Tom took a deep breath. ‘Do you like me in nappies?’ He eventually asked. ‘What do you mean?’ asked his dad. ‘Well, like just then, and other times, you seem to be encouraging it. Like you want me to be in nappies and wet myself and stuff’ asked Tom. His dad moved his gaze away for a moment thinking about what he was going to say. Eventually he returned to Tom. ‘It’s not about me, it’s about you son. I just want you to have what I never had, an understanding parent during this part of your life. It’s obviously in our genes to like this. I’ve passed it on to you. I want it to be as easy and enjoyable as possible for you to go through. Not like my experience. I’d have loved my dad to have accepted my nappy wearing, but I never got it, and I never got to find out what he would have done or said.’ ‘I see’ said Tom. ‘Granddad never knew?’ What would you have wanted granddad to do or say?’ Asked Tom. ‘I’d have liked him to say it’s fine, I’d have liked acceptance, I’d have liked….to have…well it doesn’t matter’. ‘No do say’ said Tom. ‘Heck, we’re beyond holding back aren’t we?’ Tom’s Dad paused for a considerable time. ‘I’d have liked him to change me. BUT that doesn’t mean I’m asking to change you!’ He blurted out Tom sat there, looking at his Dad. ‘Do you want to change me then?’ He asked gingerly. ‘No, No!’ said his dad definitely. ‘That’s not what I meant, I wish I’d not said that’ ‘You don’t want to, or you feel like you don’t want to ask?’ ask Tom. His dad looked increasingly uncomfortable. ‘I can’t do this’ he said starting to stand. Tom grabbed his arm like he had his a couple of days before’. His dad sat back down. ‘What do you want from this?’ Asked Tom. ‘Why are you so supportive? Why are you buying them for me?’ Asked Tom ‘Son please’ said his dad desperately trying to end the conversation. ‘No, come on dad, we gotta have this discussion’ insisted Tom. His dad started to claw at the said of the chair. ‘Because I remember how much I wanted to go back into nappies, and if I’m honest a part of me still does want to occasionally. I remember bottling it up for years, the anxiety of trying it, hiding it, feeling wrong and weird. When I discovered you’d inherited this from me I decided I didn’t want you to go through what I did. I wanted you to be yourself, be happy, fulfil your desires, be content in yourself’. Tom didn’t know what to say. His dad went on. ‘And if I’m completely honest, I want to share in your joy of it, in a way I never got to. Sorry I know that’s selfish, I don’t want to put you under any pressure, this mustn’t be about me’. ‘I really do appreciate that dad, thanks so much’ said Tom as he came over for a hug. ‘Have I got it right?’ His dad asked ‘What do you mean?’ Asked Tom ‘Do they make you feel how I think they do?’ ‘They do make me feel happy and relaxed’ said Tom. ‘A kind of contentment I’ve not felt in a long time’. ‘Then tell me son, tell me why you shouldn’t wear them as much as you want?’ After a long pause ‘When I say I’m not asking to change you, please don’t think it’s because I wouldn’t. If you asked I’d be right there for you, but I’d never put you under any pressure to, you know that don’t you?’ ‘Yeah I know that dad’ said Tom. ‘I’m not sure that’s something I could handle, at least not now’.

This was a great story. I'd love to find a woman like this.

I think one of the reasons I like this story is it's so relatable, since I had a very, very similar relationship with the diaper aisle at the store and the advertising section of the Sunday paper. I enjoyed he flashback, but I also want Maddy to get her pull-ups and/or diapers - so nice job making the slow burn even slower :).

Fifty cents a diaper. What a bargain.

Cool!😃 Big hugs!

I hope my daddy gets the chance this weekend to lay me down and change me!!!

Congratulations on the wet bed. Keep it up and enjoy the journey. I have been in nappies and incontinent for over 11 years. I have no regrets. I love my nightly bedwetting.

Or you're living in an ABDL story where the caregivers always seem to have Herculean strength! And yes, I include most of my stories in that

I have set timers on my phone to drink more just for a quicker soggy diaper.

I don't know if I drink more, but I know that I pee more often (with/without) a diaper on when I drink tea or coffee than when I drink water or milk. But I also know that I pee more often when I wear a diaper, probably because over the years my body got used to not having to "hold" when I wear a diaper. But whether or not I pee more liquid over time when the diaper is on, I'm not sure about.

I've had diapers around since my wife and I met. I've had pee issues my whole life. She's not into them herself, but knows of my love for them. I wear to bed every night, and am 24/7 on the weekends. If we go out, I'm diapered. I put them on and change in front of her. They are not part of our sex life...sadly. She has worn a couple of times years ago, and she looks great in a diaper. All that being said, I could not and would not stay with a partner that would not allow me to have this in my life. I think it would say a lot about someone if they refused to allow me to be me. On many forums I read posts from members that are miserable because the s.o. won't "allow" it. I just don't understand that. How can someone "allow/not allow" you to do what brings you joy? I look at all the other valuable things we each bring to our relationship. Neither one of us would throw that away over the absobancy level of my underwear. Sorry for the rant.

Definitely B.

It’s been years and even decades for me as well. Ever since I was thrown back into the diaper and went diaper dependent, permanently. Now I’m in diapers and I don’t regret being thrown back into diapers.Never have and never will because I love being diapered and being an adult baby. I love that I’m in diapers and I know I’m never gonna be let out and be potty trained. I love being diapered and being an adult baby and love that I can be an adult baby and not have any cares or worries.

I typically drink more when wearing a diaper.

AN OFFER HE CAN'T REFUSE “Please rise.” The bailiff scanned the courtroom, making sure that everyone had got the message. “This court is now in session,” he intoned; “the Honorable Judge Thomas Reynolds presiding." “Be seated,” the judge commanded as he spread his black robe and took his seat. Looking around the courtroom, he took the measure of the five defendants, and then shifted his gaze to the District Attorney. “Mister Ballstrom, I'm surprised to see you here this morning. What have we got?” “Solicitation, Your Honor,” the DA said in a conversational tone. “The Public Defender has agreed to a pleading on behalf of all five of the defendants.” “I see … or rather, I don't. Mister Ballstrom, in the immortal words of the Rolling Stones, The Under Assistant West Coast Promotion Man could have adjudicated this matter. So, I ask again: what brings you to my little corner of the world?” “It's the next matter on the docket, Your Honor. It's rather unusual.” The judge looked down at the paperwork in front of him, then looked back up. “I see what you mean. Forty one defendants … multiple acts of related and unrelated theft … conspiracy … aiding and abetting … what did they steal?” “Diapers, Your Honor.” “Diapers?” Judge Reynolds gave Q-Ball one of those looks that suggested his sanity was in question. “Are you serious?” “Yes, Your Honor. We have one count involving theft from a local hospital, but the other victims were clients of a local business, the Lullaby Diaper Service. Unbeknownst to the thieves, Your Honor, the owner of this establishment is a local businessman of some renown-- one Vincent Belmondo.” The judge leaned back in his chair and let out a deep sigh as he began looking over the spectators. A few were familiar faces, elderly citizens seeking live entertainment in lieu of the televised sort, but he spotted Spats in the back row. The gangster was attended by his attorney, a slimeball of the first order whose name the judge could not recall, and an equally slimy flunky who bore an amazing resemblance to the late Toothpick Charlie. Spats appeared to be studying the back of Julia Canon's head, spearing her with one of those sinister looks that suggested a man trying to figure out where to park the ice pick. It was anybody's guess what the Canons were doing in his courtroom-- the Canons and Chief Mischof. Adding to the mystery, the Chief was flanked by a nicely dressed, middle aged woman on his left, and a well dressed young man on his right. And Priscilla Canon has her left hand firmly planted on the young man's thigh. Interesting … “Will Hercule Poirot be testifying for the prosecution?” “No, Your Honor. There are witnesses, but I do not believe that it will be necessary to call them.” “I see,” Reynolds said, although in reality he didn't see at all. “Well, then, let's get this show on the road. Miss Kaplan, how do your clients plead to a single count of solicitation each?” “Guilty, Your Honor,” the Public Defender declared. Reynolds sadly shook his head. “Ruby, I'm surprised at you. By now, I should have thought that you knew every officer and sheriff's deputy in the five country area. Are you losing your touch?” “No, Your Honor; they brought in a bunch of ringers. State troopers.” “Fair enough,” he smiled. “Mister Ballstrom, what have the two of you worked out?” “A five hundred dollar fine, Your Honor, and forty-five days in County, which will keep them out of our hair over the holidays.” “So ordered,” the Judge declared as he brought his gavel down with a commendable thump. “Next case!” Leaning still farther back in his chair, he began gently swiveling to left and right while while waiting for Ruby Montpelier and her friends to exit, and a gaggle of forty one new defendants to take their place. Forty one defendants in one courtroom … this has got to be one for the Guiness Book of Records ... He stopped swiveling when it dawned on him that the defendants were all college girls, none of them likely to be over twenty-one years of age. “Mister Ballstrom,” he barked, “can you assure me that there are no minors in this group?” “I can, Your Honor; the youngest is eighteen.” “And who is their legal counsel?” “Your Honor, we are waiving our right to counsel.” “And you are?” “My name is Tippi Anne Bjornsen, Your Honor. We are all members of the Zeta Alpha Pi sorority, and my sisters have asked me to represent us in this matter.” “Stealing diapers, you mean. What on earth possessed you to do something this stupid?” “It was a sorority stunt, Your Honor, but it got out of hand-- and we do have someone to speak for us.” “And who would that be?” “Professor Grady, Your Honor.” “C'est moi,” Ian announced as he climbed smoothly to his feet. Without waiting for an invitation, he walked through the gate and crossed the courtroom to stand at Tippi's side. “Professor Ian Grady, Your Honor … and no, I'm not on the Law School faculty. My beat is East Asian Languages, and to make this affair a bit odder still, I am a customer of Mister Belmondo's diaper service-- in fact, the last one to have his diapers stolen, Miss Bjornsen here having done the honors.” “You're wearing a diaper,” the Judge declared, not quite believing what he was hearing. “Fully incontinent, Your Honor, courtesy of an AK-47 round, a piece of which is still lodged in my spine. And I apologize in advance if I … uh …” “I quite understand,” the Judge interjected. “Viet Nam?” “Special Forces, Fifth Airborne. Nha Trang. Ended up a Major.” “Judge Advocate,” Reynolds replied; “Marines … Da Nang. I was fortunate enough to get out in one piece. Welcome to my courtroom, Major; it's an honor.” “Now,” he continued, “what have the two of you masterminds worked out?” The Judge nodded at the District Attorney. “For the most part, Your Honor, it's pretty standard. Each of the forty one defendants will do six hours a week of community service at local hospitals, and will do so until they graduate. Professor Grady will see to their placement. Each will be fined in the amount of twenty-five hundred dollars, and they will remain on probation until graduation. The most unusual feature here, and one that we all agree is in the best interest of these young women, is that their collective grade point average must reach or exceed three point one throughout, or they will be in violation of their parole and making a return trip to court.” “I can live with that. Miss Bjornsen, do I need to poll each of you, or can you agree to these terms on behalf of your sorority house?” “We all agree, Your Honor … to these, and the additional term that has yet to be mentioned.” “Mr. Ballstrom?” “There is one additional element, Your Honor, and it is … unprecedented. However, before introducing it, I would like to request a recess so that Professor Grady can discuss the matter in private with Mister Belmondo. Rather than clear the courtroom, Your Honor, in the interests of time I would suggest that you allow them the use of your chambers.” Judge Reynolds stared hard at Q-Ball before coming to an abrupt decision. “Mister Ballstrom … Professor … Miss Bjornsen … in my quarters, now!” The Judge stormed out of the room, leaving a flabbergasted bailiff belatedly to announce that court was now in recess. Priscilla dashed through the gate, and followed in Ian's wake. She had smelling salts in her purse, and was prepared to intercede if this meeting went completely off the rails. . . . . “Knock, knock,” Vickie announced as she waltzed into Rita's office and dropped into her accustomed chair. “I only have one of Ian's diapers left in my bag. You got any?” “No, but not to panic. I washed and dried all the diapers that Sarah bought you when I got home last night, and I brought a dozen in with me. So, if we can get by with changing you three times a shift, we're good until early next week. Are you still continent?” “Hard to say. I'm peeing like a race horse, and my bowel control is shot. The breast milk is running right through me the same way it does Ian. I shit myself before bed, but Mommy changed me, and she was sweet about it. Same thing this morning. My diaper was absolutely soaked, and I messed at least once during the night. At the rate I'm going, I figure that in the near future I'll be going through about a dozen diapers a day.” “And you just walked in here without your winter coat while wearing your hospital diaper. Vickie, it is pretty obvious; are you becoming more comfortable with your diapers? With incontinence?” “Yes, definitely, and as odd as it might sound, I'm enjoying this.” Vickie frowned, sensing that she had misspoken. “That's not quite right. It's more like I'm benefiting from this … like it's therapy.” Rita leaned forward in her chair. She had occasionally wondered about the wellspring of Vickie's madcap lifestyle, but she had never questioned her. The wall of silence that surrounded her parents had always hinted at underlying emotional trauma. “When she was cleaning me up this morning, Sarah apologized for not paying attention to the warning signs … how I never talk about my family. She hugged me, and told me that I now had a mommy who loved her … cherished her … and that I would always be her little baby girl. And I started crying … bawling, really … and I couldn't stop. I was screaming that my parents had never loved me, and she was hugging me, telling me how much she loved me, and it felt so good to be loved … to be her baby girl. I need this, Rita; I really do!” “I'm glad, Vic … really glad, because if things go according to plan, on Saturday night you will be sleeping in your bed for the last time. It's going into storage. It's a tight fit, but yesterday I had another crib delivered and set up in the nursery-- your crib. You and Ian will both be our babies, and receive the love and the discipline that we think you deserve. You can be grown-ups with one another, but babies for us. Giving you a place in both worlds will allow you to heal, even as you express your love for one another.” “But … but … Auntie Rita, does this mean that you and Mommy aren't going to sleep with Ian?” “Oh, no, baby girl, far from it. Look, maybe it's the conversation we had last night, or maybe it's the one I'm having with Ian this afternoon, but I've been giving this a lot of thought. The way it looks is that you love Ian, and want children to be the outcome of that love. You want this so badly that I can easily see you throwing over your career to become a stay at home mom, and that's fine. But Sarah and I have careers that we're not giving up, only to have discovered at the eleventh hour that we also want to have children. We have both chosen Ian to be the father, and if that sounds calculating … well, it is. Oh, we do love him, but not in the way you see in the movies or read about in romance novels. He's a wonderful man, Vic, warm and giving, but also wounded and vulnerable and very complex. Passion is wonderful, but he also needs comforting-- a wife's love, and a mother's. So it's good that I'm a bit more comfortable with the baby than the man, and Sarah much prefers the baby to the man. I don't know where her control issues are coming from, but ultimately it doesn't matter because we need her. The bottom line, Vic? I don't want to run the household, and … sorry, but it's just not your thing. We can't do this without Sarah, so all of us are going to have to compromise. It looks like you will get to have the man to yourself most of the time; I'll settle for a piece of your action, and Sarah, I suspect, won't even be a disturbance in the Force!” “It all seems so cold … a household devoid of warmth ...” “Like an arranged marriage, you mean?” Rita softly laughed. “Well, it is an arranged marriage-- Sarah is arranging it! But they endure, Vic, and they tend to become more and more loving with the passage of time. And as for warmth?” Rita clapped her hands with delight, her eyes alive with good humor. “With two naughty babies in perpetual need of yet another spanking, you'll find that there's plenty of warmth in our household!” . . . . “Right,” Judge Reynolds snorted, “which one of you wants to tell me what's going on.” “Professor Grady will take it from here,” the DA quickly responded. He wanted to put as much distance between himself and this fiasco as possible. The judge simply looked at Ian. “Have you ever heard of Tony Accardo,” Ian asked. Reynolds shook his head. Uh, oh, Ballstrom thought. He was well acquainted with the Big Tuna, if only by reputation. “Tony heads up the Chicago Outfit-- a euphemism for the Mafia. He worked his way up through the ranks the old fashioned, Chicago way. His nickname, Joe Batters, doesn't leave much to the imagination. He mentored Belmondo, who seems to get a hard on around wood chippers. In short, Tippi here and her friends out there are in a lot of trouble. With your cooperation, I can make it go away.” Welcome to the real world, Tom ... Ballstrom had his head down. He was studying a speck of something on the carpet, wishing that he could make himself equally small. “Go on,” the Judge instructed. “We're going to make the punishment fit the crime, at least as Spats will see it. The girls are going to become his customers … diapers 24/7 for the whole of their probation. He'll get off on humiliating them, and turn a tidy profit in the process.” “And you think this lunacy will be enough to buy him off??” Ian nodded. “I've got some serious leverage that I can bring to bear, both carrots and sticks. But none of it is for public consumption. Give me ten minutes alone with him, and I'll seal the deal.” “Gareth, are you good with this?” Reynolds was done dancing around. “Yeah,” Ballstrom conceded. “Belmondo can't risk the consequences of a public humiliation, and I won't be reelected if he's going around bumping off sorority girls.” “And you think this man can make the pitch work?” The Judge was pointing at Ian. “I do.” “And how about you, Priscilla?” The Canons and the Reynolds lived on the same block, a mere four properties separating the two households. Reynolds considered himself lucky to have a grizzled veteran like Herb Canon living just down the street. “You can take anything Ian tells you to the bank.” Short and sweet. “And you are here … because?” “Part bodyguard, part nurse,” she replied. “Ian is a hot commodity that the university doesn't want to lose, so I've been assigned to keep the corporate headhunters at bay. But he also brought Viet Nam home with him in the form of flashbacks that can put him on the ground. So, I'm also here to get him back on his feet.” “All right. Professor, I don't know who you are, and from the looks of Gareth's body language, I'm content to leave it that way. You've got your ten minutes-- and help yourself to coffee. My clerk brews a mean pot!” . . . . “Be right back,” Julia said. Patting Herb's knee to reassure him, Julia headed toward the rear of the courtroom. Prudence dictated that she confront Belmondo on neutral ground. Herb followed her with his eyes, and so did Walt Mischof. “Not to worry, Herb,” the Chief muttered. “Spats is too smart to make his play in a crowded courtroom.” “How's business, Jerome? Ambulance chasing still paying the bills?” Julia had taken a seat directly in front of Jerome Goldstein, the white-haired attorney who had been running interference for Spats Belmondo for almost thirty years. “Making ends meet,” Goldstein laconically replied. He wasn't in the mood to play games with Julia Canon. Julia opened her purse, and pulled out a copy of her billing. She turned to face Spats, and thrust it in his face. “Tuesday's expenses came to nine hundred, fifty seven dollars and twenty-six cents. I haven't had a chance to work up yesterday's, but they'll be in the same neighborhood. A thousand up front would be nice.” “Pay da lady, Pauly,” Spats said to his Consigliere, who leaned forward to drop an envelope on the chair next to Julia's. She opened it, and quickly thumbed the ten C notes inside. “Do you want a receipt?” “What I want is an explanation for hows I ended up on da local news. Yous was supposed ta do this real quiet like.” “Take it up with Jerome. He apparently missed the lecture on setting up dummy corporations to hide the assets of clients who value their privacy.” “Dat right, Jerry?” Spats was glaring at his mouthpiece. “Your businesses are all legitimate, Vincent; you don't need fronts.” Jerome's tone was world weary. “Dats right, Twinkster; everytings legit. Only now, every two bit hood in da Cities knows that I deal in diapers, and dat I been ripped off by a bunch a college floozies. Dis ain't good … not good at all.” “Not to worry, Spats. Professor Grady-- one of your customers, by the way-- is selling it to the judge as we speak.” “Selling what?” “A plan that will make you a tidy profit if you play along. And you get to stick a fire hose up their asses in the process.” Julia nodded in the general direction of the young defendants. “I like da sound a dat.” Spats was licking his lips; after all, he was in business to make a profit. There was no such thing as too much cash on hand. “Then follow the Professor's lead.” Dropping the envelope into her purse, Julia walked across the courtroom to rejoin her husband. . . . . “Diapers aren't all that bad, Tippi-- especially when you've got the right person changing you.” Ian playfully winked at her. “Maybe we can change each other,” Tippi fired back, staring him down. After the judge had sneaked out of his chambers to pay a lengthy visit to the Men's Room with the District Attorney hot on his heels, Ian had escorted Tippi back to her friends while nudging Priscilla in the direction of her parents. There could be no witnesses to his conversation with Spats Belmondo. Sauntering to the rear of the courtroom, Ian sat down in the same seat that Julia had occupied a few minutes earlier. He took Goldstein's measure in one casual glance, but did a double take when he shifted his attention to the Consigliere. I swear to God! It's Toothpick Charlie, risen from the dead! Ah, well … time to get down to business … “Mister Belmondo, I'm Professor Ian Grady, one of Lullaby's adult customers. I'm happy with the product, and with the way your niece sees to my needs, but there are alternatives in the marketplace that offer superior protection. I'm wearing one right now.” Ian stood up, and turned around to give the trio a good look at his well padded rear. “Your business is about to expand, so if you'll give me your number, I'll set you up with a purchasing agent at the hospital who can point you in the right direction.” “Mister Belmondo's number is unlisted,” Goldstein interrupted, “but I'm in the phone book.” “Don't have a copy. Why don't you and Toothpick Charlie here go out and find me one? Spats and I have pressing matters to discuss, and the judge has been kind enough to offer us his chambers. He's even willing to share his coffee!” Ian looked down at the gangster with a pleasant smile on his lips, but his eyes were cold. Spats recognized the look. He was being measured for his coffin. “So you're da war hero dat I keep hearin' about.” Spats decided to bluff it out. “How many guys you clipped?” “The official count is eleven hundred, plus. The real number is north of twenty three hundred.” Ian's look did not change. “The judge is giving us the use of his chambers for ten minutes. Shall we?” Ian vaguely gestured at the door behind the bench. “Yeah. Let's get to it.” Spats climbed to his feet, double checked the shine on his shoes, and then followed Ian out of the courtroom. . . . . Priscilla was watching the girls milling around in the well of the court. Most of them looked totally lost. “Do you think any of them have made their phone call,” she asked Bernice. “I thought that was just on TV,” the house mom replied. “You mean it's for real?” Priscilla nodded. “An attorney … a loved one … the really crazy ones will call out for pizza.” “No.” Bernice sadly shook her head. “I don't think anyone's called; they're way too ashamed.” “Some of their parents must have seen the news last night. They'll be frantic. Did any of them call the house before you left?” “I don't know. The last thing I did after getting Ian settled was go around the public areas and unplug all the phones. I don't want to speak with the press, and I definitely don't want them upsetting the few girls left in the house.” “We should talk to them. They may not even know that they have the right to contact their families. Come on; let's go find out.” Priscilla led Bernice inside the railing, and together they approached Tippi, who was clearly the leader of the group and not just its spokesperson. “How are you holding up,” Bernice asked. “Oh, it's been great fun so far!” Tippi's reply was as vicious as it was sarcastic, and she was aiming daggers at Priscilla. “Comfortable beds … first class food … and we've made some new friends. Ruby is a real hoot!” “You are all entitled to make phone calls.” Priscilla decided to ignore the sarcasm. “Did anyone call your parents? Your arrests were all over the ten PM news; they must be worried sick.” “Anyone,” Bernice asked in a softer tone of voice. The girls were looking at one another, and shaking their heads. “We'll wait until we have something tangible to report.” Priscilla dearly wanted to slap Tippi Bjornsen hard enough to knock her down, then beat some sense into the self-absorbed brat. Instead, she spun away, looked up at the ceiling, took a deep breath, and tried to calm down. God, give me strength!!! “I'm disappointed in all of you,” Bernice continued, her voice still soft. “There's a man in there giving you life lessons in the meaning of compassion. He's one of your victims, and yet he's in there trying to shield you from the consequences of your actions. And none of you seem to get it … none of you.” “We're all afraid,” Janis sobbed. “I understand that Janis. And how do you think your parents feel right now? You know what's going on … they don't. I doubt if they got any sleep last night, and now their imaginations must be running riot. They love you, and they need to hear you say that you're safe. The rest will sort itself out in time.” . . . . “Vinnie, I need to make a quick call. Why don't you pour us a couple of cups of coffee?” Without waiting for a response, Ian pulled Marilyn Marsden's card out of his wallet, and dialed her home number. It seemed highly unlikely that either of the Marsdens would have gone to work this morning. “Hello?” Marilyn picked up on the first ring. “Ian Grady here, Marilyn … and by here, I mean in the chambers of the judge who got stuck handling this case. Has Janis called you?” “No! Oh, God, Ian, what's going on? We've been up all night, waiting for the phone to ring … praying ...” “Marilyn, your daughter is safe … confused, scared, probably afraid that you're going to disown her, but safe. It was your typical fraternity row stunt, only it got out of hand. Right now, I'm putting the finishing pieces on an agreement that the District Attorney and Judge Reynolds have already signed off on, so with luck, Janis will be out of here in another half hour or so. Now, can you do me a favor?” “Yes! Of course, Ian; thank you!” Ian could hear Marilyn telling her husband that Janis was okay. “I'm guessing,” Ian explained when Marilyn got back on the line, “that there are a lot of worried parents who've had rough nights. Do you know how to get a hold of them?” “Yes. Bernice gives every parent a sheet with the home addresses and phone numbers of all the girls. It's for emergencies.” “Understood. I'd like you to call everyone on the list, and let them know that their daughters are safe. They should also take a peek at their check books. I don't know who's who here, but there are forty one girls who are going to be fined twenty-five hundred dollars each as part of their punishment. I'll lay out the rest of it once the judge enters his decree.” “Are you taking the girls back to the house?” “I'd like to take them to the hospital, but first I have to see about transport. Give me time to sort it out, and I'll get back to you.” “Ian, I don't know how or why you're mixed up in this, but thank you. From the bottom of my heart … thank you.” “Touching,” Spats grunted when Ian hung up; “very, very touching.” Spats handed Ian a cup, and took a sip of his own. The gangster curled his lips in satisfaction. “Not too shabby,” he nodded; “in fact, not bad at all.” “First things, first.” Ian took a sip, and nodded his approval. “I've checked out your dad, and I know that Tomasso emigrated from Naples, but that's where the trail goes cold. What can you tell me about your grandparents?” “Wat da hell? Whys you int ... er ... rested in my family?” “Vinnie, cut it out. As bootleggers go, your dad was a good soldier, able to work with both Capone and the Purple Gang. However, Tomasso did not want his sons to follow him into the rackets, so he scrimped and saved to provide you with a high quality, private school education. And you did so well that you ended up a Brown Phi Beta Kappa, class of forty eight … next stop, a Princeton MBA. Which reminds me: my source is also a Princeton man, and he wants to know whether you still remember the fight song.” Here comes that Tiger, wow! He's running wild, They'll never stop him now! "There are several fight songs,” Spats grinned as he settled back in one of the judge's plush chairs, “but Here Comes That Tiger is my favorite. And I'm impressed Grady … really impressed. I've put a lot of time and effort into the Spats Belmondo persona, and you're the first person to crack it in all the years I've been in the Cities. What gives?” “I'm interested in your grandfathers … whether the family's roots are in Naples, or Sicily.” “Sicily. We hail from Catania … still got family there.” “Antonio?” “WHAT?” Spats was so surprised that he almost shot out of his chair. “You know my cousin?” “I've employed his services,” Ian acknowledged. “Good man to know when you need to get in and out of Libya without the authorities being any the wiser.” “Holy shit, if you'll pardon my French. How is the old reprobate?” “Prospering. A wife who cooks up a storm, and a discreet mistress. Life is good.” “And do I want to know how a disabled vet teaching out here in flyover country happens to be chummy with a Mafia don in Sicily?” Ian curled his lips thinking about it. “I do favors for friends with a wide range of international interests. That good enough?” “It'll do,” Spats shrugged. The Professor had CIA written all over him. DA's and judges didn't bow and scrape before every Tom, Dick and Harry. “Okay, here's the deal. First, the girls out there are all off limits. No repercussions of any kind. If that causes you any problems with the Big Tuna, let me know, and I'll make them go away. In return for this favor, as I said, I'm going to help you grow your diaper business. The forty one girls out there are going to become customers, and they don't get out of diaper prison until they graduate. You'll make a few bucks, and have a good laugh over your cigars and sambuca.” “Second, you're going to get a letter next week from the IRS. You've been selected for a seven year audit of your personal and business filings-- a comprehensive audit, the kind where they want proof that you actually tossed those nickels and dimes into the Salvation Army kettle. If you can't support every claim on every line of every form, they're going to crucify you.” “Let me guess. I agree to leave the girls alone, and this all turns out to be a great, big mistake.” “Yep. They'll be a handwritten telephone number at the bottom, left corner of the cover letter. Pick up the phone, and you'll be treated to abject apologies for a filing error. We got a deal?” “We got a deal,” Spats agreed. “Good.” Ian settled back in his chair. “Now let's get down to business.” “Huh? I thought we were talking business!” “Just preliminaries. My sources tell me that you would like to visit the old country, but are afraid that if you leave, you'll be denied reentry. Well, I want you to do me a little favor, and in return it's bon voyage, happy trails, however you want to put it.” “How little?” “The families still taking an interest in the food services industry?” “Are you kidding,” Spats laughed. “I'm the union rep for the SEIU in this burg!” “Well, I'm in the market for a rather odd piece of information, and I want the search to be nationwide. What I'm after is an unusual delivery, probably scheduled monthly or twice a month, to someplace remote and easy to defend. Security will probably be heavy, but it may be well concealed. The tell that there's something wrong will be in the cereals.” Utterly mystified, Spats simply shook his head. “You've lost me completely.” “The order will include kids' cereals … quite a large quantity of them.” “Shit.” Spats saw it instantly. “Kids are off limits, Professor. I want you to know that … inside the families, kids are off limits.” “It's the same with us. We've all got families, and we're all exposed. So, it's a hard, red line. You cross it, and the entire intelligence community sanctions you … nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. It's open season, and an agent whose family has been targeted gets first crack.” Spats nodded his head. It was beginning to sound like the Families had a lot in common with the CIA. “Your friends should also be on the lookout for a second tell-- a sudden increase in supplies on regular order. Now that I've surfaced, I'm expecting security at this facility to be reinforced.” Ian leaned forward in his chair, his cup of coffee forgotten. “Nine years ago, while I was laid up in a hospital figuring out how to cope with wearing diapers for the rest of my life? Back in Viet Nam, someone murdered my wife and massacred an entire village in order to run off with my daughter, all in the hope that she's inherited my gift for languages. I want her back, Vincent, and then I'm going to sanction everyone of the bastards involved. If you want a piece of the action, I'll deal you in, and I'll make it worth your while.” “I'm in.” Spats got up and walked over to the desk. He grabbed a pen and pad, and hastily wrote a number. “My personal number,” he said as he handed Ian the scrap of paper. “Anything you need? You got it.” Ian took a business card out of his wallet, and handed it over. “A pizza joint out in Bloomington, and it's a legit business. If you come up with the information I'm looking for, call this number and order a large pie. If the info is rock solid, make it a thick crust; if it's sketchy, a thin. When you're asked what type of cheese you want, say Gorgonzola. The response will be 'sorry, we're all out, but if you leave me a phone number, I'll make one for you free of charge'. The call back will set up a rendezvous; I'm thinking Julia Canon's office, which is right across the street from the hospital. I take it you've been there?” “Works for me,” Spats agreed. “One last thing. Is it true that you've got a cabin somewhere near Ely?” “Yeah … some of the boys like to go hunting.” “Got a wood chipper up there?” “In good working order.” The gangster's smile was cruel. “I might need to use it one of these days.” Ian wasn't smiling at all.

Absolutely a huge no for me. What you are describing, even with no physical sexual component, has a strong emotionally intimate component and that's not something I want to share with a relative. That wmotional connection is something I want to share with a partner, not someone related to me.

Chapter 9: Lila Gets an Older Sister (Part 1) Two-year-old Lila happily wakes up in her crib. Since the day that she first re-experienced her birth, it has been two years since the day that she was “born” (or reborn, since she used the magic diaper to travel back to the very moment of her birth). Two years and one month technically, since she spent an entire extra month being less than a day old. Since Lila has been (re)born, she has made many wishes with the magic diaper that she always wore. A lot of them had to do with wearing different outfits, all the bottles of milk that she wanted, turning various babysitters into babies her age, excessively wetting the bed, causing peeruptions in her mother’s face (most of the time, it was on Jolene, her favorite babysitter), having full control in all of dreams, remodeling her room to whatever she wanted, regressing younger on certain days that she felt more and more like a baby, and many other fun ideas. At this point, a faint glowing aura emanated all around Lila. From her continued use of the magic diaper, it magically altered her DNA. While Lila had the appearance of a human, it was clear that her form was a little more advanced than that. She was a magical girl that always got her wishes granted thanks to the magic diapers that she wore. Lila happily sighed when she noticed that her Pampers Size 3 diaper was once again soaked. From one of her past wishes, she simply waved her hands over her soaked magic diaper, and she was magically changed. She smiled and touched her diaper again, causing her bladder to fill up and empty out of control. She touched the back side of her back, and a pair of wings sprouted out of her back. She flew out of her crib, giggling with delight. I gotta love all of the past wishes that I have made! Some of them have permanent effects, like this! She touched an empty bottle in her crib, and it instantly refilled with her mother’s delicious breast milk. She reached in the air and her pacifier automatically appeared in her hand. She rapidly sucked on it, like a cold popsicle that she was trying to thaw. She touched her back again and her wings vanished. She teleported back in her crib and laid in her yellow footed sleeper, happily sucking away on her pacie. The mother walks in and glances at the crib so see if her darling daughter was awake. Sure enough, she was. Lila was laying there, with a bright smile on her face. She lifted Lila out of the crib and placed her on the changing table. “Lila,” she told her. “It’s time for another diaper change.” Lila smiled when she heard her mother say that. She loved diaper changes. Especially when her soaked diaper begins to leak. Those changes are the very best. The mother unzipped Lila’s footed sleeper revealing Lila’s wet and soggy diaper. She looked at Lila with a serious look on her face. “Honey, sooner or later, you are going to have to learn how to use the potty. But Lila shook her head. “Nu! I nu use potty!” Cynthia sighed. “You are two years old now, Lila. It is time that you start learning to use the potty. Let mommy know when you have to go potty again, okay?” Lila shook her head. “Nu!” Lila looked down at the soaked diaper that her mother was taking off. Both the diaper and her body was glowing. Mommy is not gonna make me use the potty! I never wanna use the potty! Ever! Oh, how I wish that my mommy would not want me to get potty trained! The bright light surrounding Lila and her diaper flashed and tickled her. It then touched her mother. Cynthia then grinned at Lila. “Honey, I know that you are two years old, but it doesn’t seem like you are anywhere close to wanting to use the potty. And that’s just fine with mommy. You can wear diapers as long as you want, dear. Just let mommy know when you are ready. Okay?” Lila grinned, as her mother cleaned her and put a new magic diaper on her. I’m never gonna be ready! I wanna wear diapers forever! Lila’s day continued as any of her other days did. It was full of fun, toys, and naps. Due to all of the effects of her past wishes, Lila was more magical than her ordinary human self. She could change her clothes anytime she wanted. Make whatever she wanted to eat or drink appear out of nowhere. Instantly fill her diaper at her very command. She could fly in the air and make multiple copies of herself. During her afternoon nap, she laid there staring up before she fell asleep. I love this magic diaper. But do I always have to make wishes? Oh, how I wish that I was as magical as the magic diaper! The bright glow of light tickled her, and she smiled. Her faint glow that emanated from her body became as bright as the magic diaper that she was wearing. She floated up with the aura surrounding her and transformed her room into a royal bedroom. She made a crown appear on her hair and made it night. She then fell asleep. That night, her magic diaper flashed, and Lila could hear a voice coming from it. “Not so fast.” The voice boomed. “Who are you?” Lila said, her voice beginning to tremble. “Who I am is not so much as important as who you are becoming.” the voice boomed. “I granted your every wish, and even let you keep the effects of the wishes. But the wish that you just made is going way too far.” “But…” Lila said, trembling as she peed her diaper in fear. “No buts! I had just one simple mission, and that was to find a child that was unhappy. I found you because your mother was very unhappy with the way she was treating you. And you were also a bedwetter. Finding unhappy children is always my mission. You like it when I grant all your wishes, right?” Lila nodded, afraid to say another word. ”If you like the freedom of wishes, you need to respect the rules. As far as I am concerned, making a wish to possesses as much magic as the magic diaper is going way too far, and as of this day, that wish is strictly forbidden. If you were to make it again, it will not be granted. As another punishment, I will remove all the effects of every past wish that you have made. You will still be two and you will still have the magic diaper. I just want you to make more wishes, instead of relying on all the effects of your old wishes. If you want something, wish for it!” Lila nodded. “Who are you?” Her magic diaper flashed. “Again! That is not important. Who I am is not as important as what my mission is. Search the world for unhappy children. I have them find me and they can be happy again.” Lila grinned. “I member stowwy wit genie an magic lamp! Ow yoo genie?” After Lila asked this, she heard laughter. “Genie? Is that what you’re going to call me? Who I am is not important and really none of your business. All you need to know is the mission that I was given. You were an unhappy child and my mission is to make you happy. Are you happy, Lila?” Lila nodded. “Vewy happy!” “Good. The extension of that mission then is to keep you happy. Are you going to follow the rules? I am not going to grant anymore wishes that break those rules. I only allowed them to test you. And you failed!” Lila gave the magic diaper a cute and innocent looking face. “How I fail?” “Well, the first instance that you failed was when you turned your babysitters into babies. You think that’s a lot of fun, don’t you? It is neither fair nor fun to change them into babies against their will. That is a clear violation of the rules and you will not be doing that anymore. Jenny, Julia, and Jessica are now their normal ages of 18. In fact, I will be honest. I created Julie, Jessica, and Jolene as replacements for Jenny because of the bad wish that you made. You can only turn people into babies if they want to be one.” “Awww!” Lila pouted. “But it’s so much fun to do!” “But how much fun is it going to be if you can’t make any more wishes? You will respect the rules, or I will leave you and find another unhappy child in need of that happiness that I can provide them. So what’s it going to be, Lila?” “Wespect wules!” Lila shouted. “I bweak any otha wules?” “You have broken a few other rules as well. Changing your age is not a violation of the rules. That one is perfectly fine. I also allowed you to be the youngest in place of Camden. But I think convenience wishes are pushing the rules. You want to refill your bottle? Wish for it! Don’t have a loophole where you can refill your bottle by touching it. Don’t make wishes to automatically soak or soil your diaper or wet your crib. I don’t have a problem with your bladder naturally filling up, but let nature take its course instead of replacing nature with magic.” Lila nodded. “Fowwow awl wules!” “Good girl. A couple more things. I noticed how disrespectful you are to your mother. Having me grant your wishes doesn’t give you a license to be rude or disrespectful to her. This includes always wetting your crib, sheets, and clothing and peeing on your mother or babysitter when they’re changing your diaper. Using me to grant all your wishes has made you into a spoiled rotten brat and I won’t stand for it anymore. You are going to be nice to your mother, father, brother, and babysitters or you’re not going to have a magic diaper anymore. Do I make myself clear, Lila dear?” Lila could not bear to lose the magic diaper. It came at the time that she needed it the most and it made her very happy. But the magic diaper was right. It has spoiled her rotten and she took advantage of every moment. All the bedding she made her mother have to wash and all the frustrations that she caused both her and her babysitter. This, she decided, is not going to happen anymore. “Vewy cwear!” she finally shouted. “That’s a good girl. One more thing, and it’s a big one. Your most recent wish was the biggest violation of the rules that you have made up to this point. You wished to have as much magic as the magic diaper you are wearing. To test you, I allowed it, but it will not happen anymore. As I have said already, that wish is now forbidden, and if you even make a wish like that again, I will not only not grant it, but will leave you forever. I will find another unhappy child and for all I know, you may very well be unhappy once again. Is that a promise? Will you promise that you will never make that wish again?” Lila nodded. “Uh huh! But if I unhappy, you come back?” “No. I will not. I only make one visit to each unhappy child I find. If they abuse the rules after I have already warned them, I don’t make a second visit. Believe me, I have left numerous children who are once again unhappy because they did not take heed to my warning. Consider everything that I have spoken to you as a warning. If you need any of the other rules, I can give them to you. You could wish to have the rules or remember every single one. I will grant that wish. Are you going to be a good little girl now? Lila?” Lila smiled and nodded. “I be vewy gud gul! Make mor wishes afta yoo dun?” “Yes. Besides all the rules that you have broken, I need you to be a good girl. In return, I will keep granting your wishes and will keep you happy. I will also be with you as long as you wish. By the way, it was a good wish to have me on every diaper that you wear. Some children lose me after one diaper change. But you knew how to keep me around. To better help you in the future, I must ask you this question. Lila, do you like being tickled?” Lila nodded. “Yeah! I wuv tickle! I tickle easy!” “Good. I will keep tickling you after every wish. I know all the places where you are the most ticklish. I really like you and you are probably one of the best children that I have worked with. Just be nice, okay?” Lila nodded. “Otay!” “I will leave you to your wishes now. Sweet dreams, Lila!” The booming voice stopped, and Lila continued her nap. Lila woke up before her mother even came in to check on her. The memory of the magic diaper talking to her was still fresh in her mind. Wow! That magic diaper is very serious! I was having a lot of fun with it, but there are rules? I will make sure to follow every one! I will be very nice to my mommy and daddy! Also, my brother Camden! My babysitter too! I don’t want to lose this magic diaper…She then thought of the rules again. So many rules! But I don’t know them all, and I’m afraid of breaking them again. Oh, how I wish that I remembered and knew every single rule by heart! The magic diaper tickled her again, and she could almost hear it saying, “As you wish, Lila”. All of a sudden, her mind was flooded with every rule that the magic diaper wanted her to follow. There were a lot of rules, but somehow due to the wish, she could remember every single one. And because of this, she knew what wishes she could make, and which ones were off limits. Wow! I know every rule, and I will be sure to follow every one… Lila, now having full knowledge of the rules that the magic diaper gave her, knew what she was going to wish for next. At least she had a general idea of what she wants next. She also wanted to practice being nice to everyone in her family, and her babysitter. Using the magic diaper was so much fun, but it should not give her a license to be mean and disrespectful to her family or others that cared for her. These thoughts continued to remain in her mind as she continued to think about what she would wish for next. She thought about her whole family and how much each of them loved her. Her mother, who always treated Lila like her little girl. Because of her wish, she became the baby of the family. And with her being two, she really was the baby of the family. Her father always loved to come home and see his beautiful baby girl. He always liked to get special gifts for her. Among her favorite gifts from her daddy were her pacifiers. She had various colors and designs, all reflecting what he knew she would like. And her older brother Camden. He always loved having Lila as his little sister, calling her “Little Lila” every chance he got. She loved that nickname, and she ate up all the attention. But something was missing. Lila had an older brother, but she did not have an older sister. Hmmm…I really love having Camden as my older brother. But can I just have another member in this family? I love my babysitter, but I would love to have an older sister that could babysit me. Oh, how I wish that I could have an older sister who’s older than Camden and old enough to babysit me! Lila grinned, as she knew what would happen next. Her magic diaper flashed and tickled her in her most vulnerable areas, causing her to pee her diaper a little. The pee slowly materialized into wet gels, which she usually squished around when her diaper gets really wet. Meanwhile, an older girl appeared in the house out of nowhere, in a new bedroom that appeared out of nowhere. She was in a very stylish bedroom that a teenage girl would live in. She laid with her legs stretched across the bed with an open textbook and paper. She was doing her AP math homework and was nearly finished. All of a sudden, the door cracked open. It was her mother. “Angela dear,” the mother said, staring down at her daughter. “I see that you’re almost done with that, but could you please do something for me?” Angela looked up at her mother and nodded. She knew that whenever her mother asked for a favor, it usually had to do with her baby sister. She sat up on her bed and stared at her mother with a dutiful smile. “What favor do you have, mom?” Mrs. Watson mouthed the words to her daughter to stand up. “Lila hasn’t woken up from her nap yet. Could you be a dear and get your little sister up? I don’t want to ruin her sleep schedule for tonight.” Angela smiled when she heard that the favor had to do with her baby sister, Lila. She loved her to pieces and was always fun to take care of and babysit every now and then. “Ah,” she smiled. “My little baby sister needs to be woken up for her nap. Sure mom! I’ll go check on her right away!” “That’s my Angie,” she mother said, patting her daughter on the head. Angie nodded and exited her room. She crossed the hallway and entered Lila’s room. There her baby sister laid. She was only two and still sleeping in her crib. Shouldn’t she be too old for that crib and have a toddler bed? But mom said that she will grow out of it when she’s ready. Plus, she told me how she has tried this before. She just kept falling out of bed. At this, she smiled and she approached the crib, looking down on her beautiful baby sister. “Li…la!” she sung in a pleasant, sustained tone. “My sweet little princess. Did you have a good nap?” Lila’s eyes opened and she smiled when she saw the result of her wish looming over her and smiling. From all the flood of memories that filled her mind associated with the wish, she knew her older sister by name. “Annghee!” she shouted. “Ana-lah! I good nap!” Angela laughed when she heard her little sister respond. “Oh, you’re so cute! So you had a good nap then? Angie’s gotta check to see if you went pee pee. Did you go pee pee in your diaper, Lila girl?” Lila remembered the rules from the magic diaper. She wanted to be nice to her older sister that she loved. But all of a sudden, she felt a sharp sensation in her abdomen. And then a strong bowel movement followed. At that point, Lila couldn’t hold it anymore. A strong flow of gushy mass began flowing into her diaper. “Poopy!” she shouted. Angela looked at her little sister with surprise. “Poopy? Wow, you just…” Angela caught a strong whiff of the business that Lila just finished doing in her diaper. “Woo! That’s quite the stink bomb, you little stinker!” She reached down into the crib to tickle Lila. “Tika tika tika tika tika!” she said, tickling Lila all over. Lila squealed and laughed. She then peed her diaper a little more. Her diaper was now very soaked, but not quite ready to leak yet. Angela lifted Lila out of her crib and laid her on the changing table. “Legs up little girl!” she ordered. Lila lifted her legs right on cue. Angela pulled off Lila’s skirt and unsnapped her diaper. She wadded up the messy diaper and began cleaning Lila up. After wiping everything clean, she inspected Lila to find a tiny rash starting to form near her princess place. She took some cream and spread it all over that area. She then powdered the new Pampers Size 3 and her front. She laid her on the new diaper and stretched it over her, fastening the tabs snugly into the landing zone. “All changed, my cute little sister!” Angela told her. Lila smiled as she glanced at the diaper that was snugly fastened just below her belly button. Like every diaper that she has ever been changed with, it was glowing brightly. And with all the rules that she knew, she knew that only she could see the glow, and any other younger child. Angela put Lila’s skirt back on her. Before she left Lila’s room, she grabbed one of her sister’s Size 3 Pampers Cruisers diapers and hid it in her pants. She then called to her mother. “Lila is up and I changed her! Can you go get her?” “Yes dear! I’m coming, Angie!” Angie smiled as she passed her mother in the hallway. She then entered her room and closed the door to finish her homework. Before Angela began to finish her homework, she got out the diaper that she took from her baby sister’s room. She pulled down her pants and panties and unfolded the diaper. She then stretched it and laid it over her panties. She then pulled her pants up, with the diaper covering her inside her panties. Angela smiled, as she felt the soft diaper inside her panties. Having done this for about a month already, she was ready to take this to the next step. At her local pharmacy, she saw some fitted briefs that she had her eye on. When her parents go away for the weekend, she would go and buy them. Afterall, she will be the one babysitting Lila while they’re gone. Angela began to squirm, and then slowly began to pee into the diaper. She felt the warm and moist pee against her body before it turned into a squishy gel. My sister is so lucky! I don’t know why I am starting to like diapers so much. This is so silly… That’s when she thought of the dream. One night about a month ago, Angela had a strange dream and this is what happened. Begin strange dream Angela closed her textbook and put her pajamas on. Having spent so much time on her homework, it was very late. She crawled into her bed, and her eyes became heavy. Then, it happened. Angela’s bladder was full and she began to squirm beneath the sheets. Before she could even get out of bed, her bladder slowly emptied. She soaked her pajamas and then the bedding. As she was doing this, she could feel herself getting smaller and smaller. Then she spoke and realized that her voice was little again. It sounded like she was four. All she could do that point was scream. “MOMMY! I wet the bed!” The door burst open, with the mother sighing. “Again, Angie? This is the fifth time this week that you did this.” Angela’s face filled with tears. “I’m sorry, mommy!” She shouted. “I’m sorry!” The mother shook her head. “Angie…That’s it. I already told you. What did mommy say if you have one more accident?” Angela was trembling as she looked at her mother. She was too afraid to respond. “You know what mommy told you! You had another accident, so that’s it. I’m putting you back in diapers.” A look of frustration and joy filled Angela’s eyes. “But I’m a big girl mommy! And big girls don’t wear…” “Enough dear!” The mother said, as she got out a Pampers Size 4, pulled off the sopping wet underwear, and laid her daughter on the floor. “You wet the bed again, so you lost your big girl privileges.” She got out some baby wipes and began wiping Angela clean. She then powdered the diaper and Angela’s front side. “Put your legs up, honey.” Still in tears, Angela did what she was told. Her mother folded the diaper over her to cover her front side. Then, she fastened both tabs snugly to the landing zone. Angela then wiped her tears, and a look of relief came over her. Being diapered by her mother again felt kind of…nice. The mother looked at Angela sternly. “Mommy’s going to check your diapers every morning. If they’re soggy, you are going to keep wearing them every night until we start having dry nights. Mommy doesn’t want any extra laundry, okay?” Angela nodded. “Okay mommy…” The mother put on some new bedding and tucked her daughter in. She kissed her goodnight again and left her room. Then it happened again. Angela was beginning to flood her diaper. She let out a sigh of relief as the warm pee began to touch her body. End strange dream Upon waking up from that strange dream, Angela found herself in soaked pajamas and bedding. After experiencing this for the next four days in a row, she needed some protection for her new nighttime accidents. Knowing that Lila wore diapers, she started sneaking them into her bedroom and wore them to bed. Every morning from when she started doing this, the diaper was always fully soaked. She finished peeing in one of her baby sister’s diapers and laid down to finish her honor’s math homework. Meanwhile, Lila was downstairs with her mother, enjoying her next feeding time. She latched on to her mother’s exposed breast and was suckling off her right nipple. A flow of warm breast milk began to fill Lila’s mouth. Since she had a mouthful, she gulped it down and smiled. “Milky!” she shouted. The mother smiled as she looked at her darling daughter. “You like that yummy milk?” Lila nodded. “It gud!” She glanced around wondering what her older sister was doing. This milk really is yummy, but what is my older sister up to? Oh, how I wish that I knew what my older sister was doing! She knew not to make a wish being able to read her sister’s mind as that was a violation of the rules and an invasion of her sister’s privacy. The magic diaper gave her a flash and tickle of approval and her wish was granted. Lila closed her eyes and could suddenly see her sister upstairs, laying there and doing her homework. She then saw her sister walk out of her room and into her room again. Where is she going? She then saw her sister grab a diaper and leave her room with it. Why is my sister taking my diapers? This was a question that she wanted to ask the magic diaper, as she didn’t want to break any rules. But in remembering all of her accidents that she had when she was five, she smiled and nodded. Could my older sister be a bedwetter too? Maybe I’ll ask her later… The weekend came and Mr. and Mrs. Watson left Angela in charge of the house and with babysitting Lila. They gave her money to buy food and extra diapers for Lila in case she needed them (Lila was almost out of diapers, due to her sister sneaking them). And since Angela just got her driver’s license, she got to drive a red Chevy Impala which her father got for her. They gave Angela the rules and told Angela to “have fun”. Angela smiled, knowing that she was going to have fun with her favorite little sister. Well, her only little sister. Camden was staying over at a friend’s house for the weekend. The door closed and Angela picked Lila up. She placed her on the couch and she lounged on it with her. “So, my little princess. What do we want to do? Do we want to watch a cartoon? How about some Baby Shark or Cocomelon?” Lila smiled at the idea of watching those videos again. But the curiosity regarding her older sister filled her mind again. Why did she take my diapers? Is she really a bedwetter? Lila couldn’t stop thinking about this, and before her sister could load YouTube, she shook her head. “Nu!” she shouted. She wanted to say “no”, but her speech could only be that of a two-year-old. She knew all of the rules by heart, so she knew what she could do to fix this. I want to speak to my sister like I’m five but I’m still speaking like a two-year-old! Oh, how I wish that I could talk with much better speech! The magic diaper tickled Lila with the flashing light and her wish was granted. “Angela!” Lila shouted. Angela gasped. “Did you just say my name clearly? What happened to ‘Ana-lah’?” Lila’s face blushed. “Um…I’ll tell you later! Don’t play the videos yet! I have an important question to ask you!” Angela grinned. “Wow. For a two-year-old, your vocabulary is very impressive. Can you explain to me why?” Lila sighed. She had to make up something for now, but she would tell her sister later. “Um…I’m very shy! I talk like a baby around everyone ‘cause I’m afraid to speak to them in full sentences…” Angela gasped again. “Why Lila? Just look at you! Speaking in this kind of vocabulary for a two-year-old! You’re a very gifted little girl! You and I share mom’s smart genes.” Lila nodded at her sister with impatience. “Yeah! Now, I have a question!” Angela nodded, as she stroked her little sister’s golden-brown hair. “What does my little princess want to know? Ask me anything!” Lila blushed, and after a few minutes finally blurted out her question. “Angie, are you a bedwetter?” Angela’s face became a shade of pink. She was not prepared for her little sister to ask her this kind of question. “Umm…Lila?” Angela twitched and her bladder began to release. “Why do you think your older sister is a bedwetter?” Angela’s panties became soaked and a small puddle began forming underneath her. That’s when it hit her. Oh no. I forgot to put on one of Lila’s diapers! Lila looked at the accident that was spreading underneath her older sister. “Why?” She giggled. “Because you’re doing it right now!” Angela’s face grew redder and she began to whimper. “I’m sorry!” she told Lila. “I’m very very sorry that you have to see this!” But this time, Lila didn’t laugh. She remembered how important it was to be nice and respectful to her family. She wrapped her arms around her older sister with an understanding look. “It’s okay.” She told her. “Accidents happen.” Angela grimaced. “Yes Lila. But they normally don’t happen to big girls like me! And what do you know about accidents? You wear diapers!” Lila sighed. It was time to tell her older sister the truth. “Let me tell you a secret.” She told her older sister. She leaned over into her sister’s ear and whispered. “I was a bedwetter when I was five!” Angela shook her head and laughed. “Don’t be silly, little Lila. You’re still two!” “Na-ah!” Lila argued. “I wasn’t always like this. I have another secret to tell you, but you must promise not to tell mommy or daddy…” But Angela kept laughing. “You are so so funny. Please cut it out. Let older sis get into something dry.” But Lila shook her head. “Here’s my secret. I am wearing a magic diaper. Oh, how I wish you could see the glow coming from it!” Lila knew that she could confide her secret to an older person, as that wasn’t against the rules. The magic diaper tickled her with the bright glowing light. Angela gasped when she saw the light. “Lila, where is that light coming from?” “From my magic diaper!” she shouted. Angela still couldn’t believe it. “You put a light in your diaper, didn’t you?” She laid Lila on the floor and removed her skirt. “Let me see that light, you little stinker!” She unsnapped the diaper and took it off. She noticed that there was no light inside it. The entire diaper glowed before her very eyes. At this point, Angela was freaking out. “Lila, why is your diaper flashing like this?” Lila sighed. “I already told you. It’s a magic diaper.” Angela gasped, as she re-diapered Lila since the diaper was dry. “Magic…diaper? Okay then. What makes it so magical besides it glowing?” Lila grinned. “I will tell you. But you must tell me why you’re a bedwetter. I will then tell you about the magic diaper and how I got it.” Angela nodded. “Deal. Okay…Where do I begin? You are only two years old so who are you really going to tell? Okay. I know that this is going to sound weird to you, but you’re my smart little sister. Here goes. I had a very weird dream over a month ago where I was finishing my homework and getting my pajamas on. I then got into my bed. After that, I had to pee, like really bad.” Lila nodded. “Then you wet the bed, right?” Angela nodded as her face blushed. “Yes. But what made this dream really weird was that I kept getting younger and younger as I was wetting the bed. I got younger until I was just four years old. At this point, I was freaking out, so I screamed to my mom and told her that I wet the bed. “ Lila gasped. “So you became younger? That’s pretty weird.” Angela sat Lila on her lap. “It gets weirder. Mom comes in looking upset. She told me that it was the fifth time that I wet the bed that week and that was the final straw. She told me that she had to put me back in diapers. So, she cleaned me, powdered me, and then diapered me. And you wanna know what’s weird? I actually kind of liked it.” Lila gasped. “You LIKED it?” Angela blushed again. “Yeah. Very weird, huh? When I woke up from that weird dream, my underwear pajamas, and bedding were all soaked. And this didn’t stop happening after that. After wetting the bed for the next four nights, I desperately needed some protection for my nighttime accidents. So…I snuck some of your diapers into my room so I could wear them. Can I keep doing this? I could…Or I could get some adult diapers that fit me. So yeah. That’s why your older sister is a bedwetter. Now, how did you get that magic diaper and what makes it so magical?” Lila hugged her older sister, which made a few tears come out of her eyes. “It’s okay.” Lila told her again. “I’m just happy to have an older sister like you to talk to.” Lila, who was still sitting in just a pink shirt and diaper, pointed down to her the glowing diaper. “As I have already told you, this is my magic diaper. With this magic diaper that I’m wearing, it can grant me any wish!” Angela gasped. “You’re kidding! ANY…wish?” Lila nodded. “I’ll prove it again. Oh, how I wish that I could have my pacie!” The magic diaper tickled her with a flash of light, and a pacifier appeared in her hand. Angela was taken in shock by what just happened. “The magic diaper just did that?” Lila nodded. “Yup! It will grant my every wish, just as long as I don’t break any rules. Or it will leave me forever…” Angela was still in shock, with so many questions filling her mind about the mysterious diaper that Lila was wearing. “W-where did you get it?” she stammered. “I’ll tell you, but you have to believe me.” Lila told her. “Okay?” Angela nodded. “I have seen you get a wish granted with that thing so I totally believe you. Please tell me!” Lila climbed off of Angela’s left knee and onto her other knee. “I’ll tell you.” Lila said, as she began her story. “Before I was even a little baby, I was just a five-year-old girl getting ready for bed in my house. I was not the youngest, but had a little brother named Camden.” Angela gasped. “But Camden is seven! He’s older than you!” Lila sighed. “Can you let me continue? Yes, he’s older now. But he wasn’t always older than me. I was older than him. I was five and my little brother Camden was only three months old. I was very jealous about all the attention that he was getting. My mommy was not even paying attention to me! Ever since my little brother was born, I started to wet the bed. At first it didn’t happen very often, but it soon started to happen every night. Even now and then, I didn’t wet the bed. But those were very rare nights. That night, my sheets were still dry, and my little brother woke me up. It made me so mad that he always got everything! Every time little Cammie was a little wet, my mommy would always go and change him. And here I was, wetting the bed almost every night!” Tears began to roll down Lila’s eyes. “I’m sorry…” Angela cuddled her little sister and comforted her. “It’s okay. I’m starting to understand now. Continue…” “Anyway,” Lila continued. “My mommy got up and changed Camden. Then she went back to bed. I used to be the baby before Camden was born. I just wanted mommy to pay more attention to me! I had a dream where I really had to pee, so I got up and went to the toilet. I made it! I peed everything into the toilet and then I woke up. My Frozen underwear, pink pajamas, and My Little Pony bedding was soaked! Just like it was almost every night. I got up and woke mommy up. I didn’t want to sleep in wet bed sheets. So, I woke mommy up and she took me to the bathroom. She told me to wait there while she took care of my bedding. I just couldn’t take it! I was just crying my eyes out from this always happening now.” “Aww…” Angela said, snuggling Lila close to her. “Now, how did you find it? Are we close to that?” Lila grinned. “Very close. Anyway, while mommy was taking care of my bedding, I noticed a faint light coming from inside the trash can underneath the sink. “The magic diaper!” Angela gasped. Lila nodded. “Uh-huh. I took off all my wet clothes and opened the door. I found a white plastic sack that you find in those big boxes of diapers. It looked like it was empty, but why was there a light coming from it? Since I wanted to know where the light was coming from, I reached into the white plastic sack and pulled out a diaper. It looked like mommy forgot that she had one diaper left! She forgot to use it on Camden! I put it pack in the trash with the white sack and closed the door to the sink. Mommy came back and we both took a shower, so she made sure that I was nice and clean. Then she gave me new Frozen underwear with yellow pajamas. She took me back to my room and I saw that my bedding was changed with Disney Princesses on them.” Angela grinned. “I see. Do you want to watch a Disney Princess movie now?” Lila shook her head. “I’m not finished. You wanna know how I got it? Anyway, my mommy tucks me into my dry bedding. I am now in my dry pajamas. I waited for mommy to go back to bed for a few minutes. When it got quiet, I snuck out of bed and went back to the bathroom to get the diaper. I opened the door underneath the sink and got the diaper out of the white sack. I then took the diaper back to my room. The diaper was only a Size 1, so it couldn’t fit me. I laid in my bed with the diaper on the floor, trying to think what to do with it. Since it was glowing, I was thinking of using it for a night light. I’m scared of the dark, so I usually sleep with a night light.” Angela playfully jabbed Lila and laughed. “I know that you are. You had a screaming fit when I forgot to turn it on one night.” Lila nodded. “Yeah. I’m still afraid of the dark. But instead of using that diaper for a night light, I decided to get out of bed and hold it. I then thought of my little brother Camden again and how he got everything. How mommy kept ignoring me and always wetting the bed every night. I held the magic diaper in my hand. As hard as I could, I wished that I was the little sister instead of my brother. The magic diaper flashed, then I noticed something weird. It looked like the diaper could now fit me, so I took my pajamas and underwear off. I laid down and I put the diaper on, doing it just the way I remember mommy doing it with Camden. I was sitting there in my baby brother’s diaper and it actually…fits? Then more weird stuff happened. I couldn’t move, so I made another wish. I wished that I could be laying in my bed. I appeared in my bed and more weird stuff happened. My bed started to turn into a crib and then I got so tired that I fell asleep. When I woke up, I was in my crib again. I couldn’t talk ‘cause I was only three months old. The same age as Camden. That means…” “Camden became your age?” Angela gasped. Lila nodded. “Yeah. Mommy came in the room and it felt so good to be babied by her again. Finally! Mommy was paying attention to me! After that, I made many more wishes with the magic diaper. One important wish I made early on was that every diaper that mommy changed me into was a magic diaper. That way, I always had unlimited wishes and could have whatever I wished. I wished for a babysitter, I made fun wishes during my naps, I wished that I was old enough to walk again, then I wished that I could be older and younger. Finally, I wished to be at the moment I was born and decided to stay there. I didn’t make any more wishes to be older. I just grew up from when I was born, making many more wishes with the magic diaper. I became very powerful due to a lot of the effects of the wishes still lasting. I then wished to become as magical as the magic diaper. I found out that was a very bad wish.” Angela gasped. “Why? Are you still that powerful?” Lila shook her head. “No. The magic diaper scolded me like my mommy and daddy and told me I was a bad girl for breaking a lot of rules with the magic diaper. Wishing to be that powerful became a forbidden wish, and I could never make it again. I didn’t know that there were rules to using it but it let me know very quickly.” “It talked to you?” “Yeah. It was a loud voice and it told me every rule that I broke and told me not to do it again. It also told me to be nice to my family. I didn’t want to lose the magic diaper, so I listened. It spoke to me while I was taking my afternoon nap.” Lila smiled. “The one that you woke me up from!” Angela embraced her little sister again. “So, what wishes did you make after that?” Lila grinned. “I wished for an older sister, and you appeared!” Angela shook her head. “How? I’m the oldest, and I have always known you, Lila.” Lila pointed down at the magic diaper. “It’s the magic diaper. It made my wish happen, so it was like you were always here.” Angela looked at her body in disbelief. “So I’m here because of that magic diaper?” Lila nodded. “Yup!” Angela hugged Lila and cried a few more tears. “Well,” Angela said looking at her soaked panties, dress, and the couch. “Now that I know that you have a magic diaper, can you wish me some diapers? I at least want to wear them to bed until I’m dry every night.” Lila nodded. “That’s what I wanted to do anyway. I was going to help you with your bedwetting, but I wanted to know why.” Angela got up from the couch and began to go upstairs. Something stopped her in midstep. “Wait.” She said, facing Lila, her face starting to redden. “How did you find out about me wetting the bed?” Lila looked at her sister and giggled. “Oh, that. I knew that I couldn’t make a wish to read your mind so I wished that I knew what you were doing. It granted my wish by me being able to see you when I close my eyes. I saw you leave your room and enter mine to take one of my diapers. That’s when I guessed that you were a bedwetter. Why else would you need diapers?” She looked at her sister. “Are you getting a shower?” Angela nodded. “Yeah. Gotta get out of these wet clothes. We’ll watch a Disney movie together after I get changed. Oh, and I soaked the couch cushion a little. Can you make a wish to remove that stain?” Lila nodded. “Sure! Oh, how I wish that the couch cushion where my big sister peed it is clean!” The magic diaper tickled Lila with its light and her wish was granted. The couch cushion was not only clean, but it smelled kind of nice. Angela went upstairs to go and freshen up. While Angela was doing this, Lila went up to her older sister’s room and did what she promised. She wished for three mega sized boxes of Pampers that could comfortably fit her sister. Because of the wish, the Pampers were an even bigger size than what could be found in stores. They were Size 12’s and could easily fit Angela. Lila looked at the boxes of diapers and smiled. Three is not too many. I have a feeling that my big sister is going to be in them for a while…Lila then wished for the diapers to be only visible to her and Angela so their mother couldn’t see any of the diapers or the packaging. She finally wished for a large pack of baby wipes, a couple tubes of Aquaphor, and three big containers of baby powder, which she made visible only to her and Angela with another wish. She left her big sister’s room, giggling. It feels so great to help my big sister! Lila toddled back downstairs to the living room, waiting for her sister so they could watch a Disney princess movie. Angela got out of the shower and smiled. She was still flabbergasted at everything that just happened. Her little sister suddenly started talking in complete sentences and disclosed a very big secret to her. She was wearing a magic diaper that could grant her every wish. And after she demonstrated it by wishing for her pacifier, she immediately believed it. She then gasped when she thought of Lila wishing for an older sister. It’s because of Lila that I…exist? The idea felt weird to her, but because of Lila, Angela was born into the world and was the oldest in the Watson family. When she thought of Lila talking in complete sentences again, it all made sense now. From the story that Lila told her, Lila was not really a two-year-old girl. She was a five-year-old in a two-year-old’s body. Her mannerism’s all reflected that. Angela walked into her room with a towel wrapped around her waist. She glanced in her closet and almost had a heart attack. “You wished for three big boxes, Lila?” she shouted. “Thank you, my sweet little princess.” She whispered. Angela knew that it wasn’t bedtime yet, but she had to check out these new Pampers that Lila wished for. Angela opened the big box that contained 80 diapers. There were 4 white sleeves of 20 Pampers each. She opened up the first sleeve and took one out. This was going to be even better than wearing Lila’s little diaper as a pad, since these ones actually fit her. She looked at the box again. “Size 12?” she smirked. “They don’t even make Size 12! The biggest I’ve seen is Size 7…” She glanced around and found the baby wipes, the Aquaphor, and the powder. She didn’t need wipes or Aquaphor, since she just showered and was wearing these diapers for the first time. She laid down like she has seen Lila do so many times during a diaper change. She opened up the diaper, stretched it out, and powdered the inside of it. She laid on top of it and powdered her princess parts. She knew the proper hygiene having done it with Lila so many times. She stretched the diaper over the front of herself and fastened the two large tabs snugly over the landing zone. She put on her bra with a green dress and joyfully skipped down the stairs. But when she got to the living room, she felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. “Lila?” Lila got up from the couch and approached her older sister. “Yes, big sister?” Angela pointed up stairs. “Th-those diapers in my room. There are so many of them. If mom sees this, I’m in so much trouble.” Lila giggled. “She won’t see anything! I wished that only we could see it!” Angela stammered. “What about the wipes, the creams, the powder…” Lila shook her head. “Only we can see it. She won’t be able to.” Angela hugged her baby sister. “Oh, thank you, Lila! My magical diaper girl!” she said, as she patted Lila on her diapered bottom. “Wait…Li…la! Does my little princess need a diaper change?” Lila stood up as she began to flood her diaper. “Maybe!” she shouted in a cutesy voice. Angela gave Lila a playful jab. “Maybe! What is that supposed to mean? Here. I’m going to check….” She felt the bottom front of Lila’s diaper and it was very warm. “Ahhhh! You’re peeing it now, aren’t you?” Lila nodded. “I’m so used to it that it just happens. Sometimes when I’m not even thinking about it.” Angela nodded. “Well, let me know when little Lila is done!” A few more second passed and Lila diaper was almost at the point of leaking. “Little Lila is done!” Lila giggled, humoring Angela. “Well, lay down so I can change you!” Angela told her little sister. Lila laid down. Angela cleaned Lila, powdered her and laid her on a new diaper. Lila then gave Angela a funny look. Angela frowned. “What?” Lila grinned. “Are you wearing one?” Angela played dumb. “What are you talking about?” “You know!” Lila told her. “Those diapers that I wished for upstairs. Are you wearing one?” Angela’s face started to redden, and she let go of the diaper she was in the middle of putting on Lila. “What? Me? Nope!” Lila then pulled up her sister’s dress, fully exposing the Size 12 Pamper that she was wearing. “You’re not wearing? Then what’s that? It looks like a diaper to me!” Lila giggled, seeing her older sister in diapers. Angela’s body began to twitch and she began to pee herself in embarrassment. “Y-y-y-yes Lila!” she confessed. “I am wearing one! I know that it is weird, but I kind of like wearing them too!” “And you’re peeing it too!” Lila told her. “I can tell. Your face looks like a tomato. And it's okay if you like wearing them. That's why I wished for so many of them for you. I figured that you might like them." Angela nodded. “You are so right, Lila! I’m glad that I’m wearing it too. We don’t want another accident…” She hugged Lila. “But isn’t this great, Lila? We both get to be diapered girls this weekend!” Lila frowned, still laying on top of her open diaper. “You need to finish changing me!” Angela nodded, and fastened the tabs snugly to the landing zone. She then put Lila’s skirt back on her. Her face then became very serious. “PLEASE don’t tell mom that I am starting to like diapers.” Lila nodded. “She won’t see anything. If I’m hiding them from her, I’m not going to tell her. We’re sisters. We can trust each other with our deepest secrets. Now, can we watch that Disney princess movie now?” Angela nodded as she patted her diapered bottom. “Sure Lila!” Angela prepared two drinks for her and Lila. She got Lila a baby bottle filled with milk and a large glass of orange soda for herself. They both watched Cinderella and Angela chugged her soda, not worrying about having to pee during the whole movie. She felt the now cold squishy gel that was in her slightly soaked diaper. Yup! This weekend is going to be so awesome… Lila looked at her big sister and smiled. She sat in her lap and began to cuddle her. She then wished for her pacifier to appear again and began sucking on it. The bottle that Angela gave her was already empty, so she needed something else to suck on. She contentedly sucked on her pacifier as she enjoyed the Cinderella movie with her older sister. This was a very good wish! I’m very happy that I can have an older sister that can take care of me. Even one that turns out to still need diapers…She quietly giggled when she thought about that. From the rules that the magic diaper gave her, she straightened up. She wanted to be a good girl and really cared about her older sister. When her mother comes home, she will continue to show her kindness to her mother, too. Both Angela and Lila continued to watch Cinderella to the ending, where they lived happily ever after. While the movie was over, the weekend has just begun.

I used to get large half gallon jugs of ice tea and drink one or two of them over a weekend or evening for filling my diapers faster! Haven't done that in a while, ice tea has sort of been replaced with beer, but to a lesser extent. I'm not going through a 12 pack over the weekend, not even a six pack, really. Maybe I have to step up my game..... or not lol. I also like to have a gatorade before I go to bed, plus a cup of water. Usually fills a diaper very nicely overnight! Unless I was kinda dehydrated.

This will be the final chapter of the catchup of my over-writing frenzy. Hope y’all enjoy, chapter 26 and on will be Bethany and Ashley’s evening escapades, started writing 26 but it will be a minute, have a big event this weekend that is going to have me distracted but I hope to have more for you in the coming week. Chapter 25 Elizabeth was disconnected from the table and lifted down to her feet to stand next to Sharlese. It was her first time unrestrained and on both feet in her time so far that she was actually able to take in and fully compare herself. Elizabeth and Bethany were considered tall amongst amazons but Elizabeth found herself at best at eye level with Sharlese’s chest. Sharlese was truly a giantess, an extremely rare genetic variant of the Amazon genome, much more common than Ashley’s particular makeup but fairly uncommon. Even Max would have to look upwards a bit at Miss Sharlese which had Elizabeth in throws of awe and submission. She was so used to using her Amazon size to its advantages to overpower and overcome any and all problems but standing next to Sharlese she felt tiny. Both because she was shorter and because sharlese’s build was at least one and a half Elizabeth’s wide. “Come along.” Sharlese beckoned with a finger as she approached a secondary door inside of the nursery that Elizabeth had been curious about. Sharlese opened the door into an en-suite bathroom. There was a walk-in closet immediately inside the door on the right. Elizabeth peeked in and could see hangers loaded down with short dresses, long dresses, ridiculously puffy dresses, onesies, arrays of strappy leather items, a stockpile of diapers amongst the shelves in different variations and colour schemes. There were two black cabinets with the same locks as the crib and wardrobe, they were a little ominous with black roses, the stems covered in thorns, carved into the doors. There was another door at the end of the bathroom past the closet, it had a padlock running through a cast iron hinge sealing the door. Sharlese took note of her gaze and commented. “That is the water closet, you will be given limited access to the potty when you are a good girl as a reward.” Elizabeth noted that, clearly she would not be getting access at this point in time, she had noticed a bit of building pressure in her bladder and a toilet sounded nice after the constant string of diapers she had been in. Across from the closets was the shower and independent bathtub, both appeared to be extremely high end with extra nozzles and jets protruding from the surfaces of black granite with brass fittings. Sharlese opened the glass door of the shower for Elizabeth to step in. “You will need to be rinsed before your bath.” Sharlese followed her in which Elizabeth found a little odd then started pulling cables from the walls and floors to attach to the cuffs that were still on from the change. A button was pushed and the cable slack was snapped up before she heard the faint sound of electric motors behind the wall pulling her. She only resisted for a moment but they proved to be unyielding. She realised she was headed towards the position Bethany had put her in the previous morning, was she really going to be starting this morning with an enema too? The motors stopped when her palms were against the wall and her feet were spread to the outer edges of the shower which was a much wider split than she had done the previous morning. Sharlese pulled a plastic cap over Elizabeth’s hair and made sure it was all tucked in before a blindfold was pulled over her eyes. Elizabeth was left for only a brief moment before she felt something against her lips, it felt like the pacifier bulb which her body couldn’t resist for some reason. She regretted the decision when straps were pulled around her head and secured. “Since you refused your morning bottle, we will double it for your shower.” Sharlese said as a tube was connected to the front of the pacifier and a valve turned which let the sweet formula flow into Elizabeth’s mouth. She felt some shocks in her tongue and recognized she had just been fitted with a trainer pacifier to encourage her to suck down the formula. Some of the fullness had subsided at this point but a double serving of the massive bottle she had seen would surely pop her. Sharlese seemed to have stepped out of the shower but only for a moment before she felt something probing her back door. She let out a little yelp as something slid in and she could hear the sound of a pressure cuff pump bulb being squeezed. The object inside her expanded little by little until it became almost uncomfortable and she let out a little yelp. Sharlese gave the bulb two more pumps for good measure and dropped it, letting it swing between Elizabeth’s legs. The sound of the sliding glass door could be heard before she heard the hiss of steam being pumped into the enclosure as the coolness subsided and was replaced with the warm embrace of thick humid air. She heard the rush of water after a few minutes and felt multiple streams hit her body all at once from several directions. Finally what she dreaded most, the plug in her began to introduce warm water into her bowels. It seemed to be an automated enema as it would only pump in a small amount of water and then quickly evacuate it before adding a fresh supply. Each time it made a cycle it would increase the amount by a low percentage. This treatment went on for 15 minutes and Elizabeth couldn’t say she hated it. The water was warm and relaxing and honestly the enema felt refreshing. The thing she didn’t like was the constant stream of formula filling her mouth and the bloated tummy feeling she was getting from it. Her tummy was bulging out from the large serving of oatmeal and the heavy formula sloshing around inside her. It took away some of her physique and gave her the appearance of baby fat. Finally the water shut down and a flow of hot air was pushed through the shower to dry her skin. Sharlese must have stepped into the shower because she felt her pacifier being pulled away and her restraints being released, the blindfold leading the shower cap before she was helped out of the shower. Sharlese guided her to the tub where she stepped into the warm bubble bath that had been prepared. It smelled of flowers, not as sweet as something she’d use on a little but very fragrant. The nanny gently scrubbed Elizabeth’s skin with a soft loofah until she was practically glistening. Aside from the forced feeding and enema, Elizabeth imagined this must be how queens live, waited on and bathed by someone else. She’d gladly accept that bit of humiliation for this sort of treatment. Her hair was brushed before Sharlese used a cup to scoop water from the bath and gently pour water over her head. She used her hand on the girl's forehead to shield her eyes from the water as she wet her hair down. Shampoo was gently massaged into her scalp followed by a rinse and a second shampooing and rinse. Finally oils and conditioners were applied that had her black hair practically mirror-like and shiny beyond any regimen she had ever come up with. She was in such bliss that the growing pressure in her bladder and over-full feeling in her stomach seemed to flow down the drain with the spent water after Sharlese pulled the plug. She was helped out of the tub and stood on a mat while Sharlese dried her off with the softest, fluffiest towel she had ever felt. She really, really, really could get very used to this. She was guided out of the bathroom and back to the changing table. She knew she was coming to the end of her stay here and would have to return home in a diaper to avoid the wrath of the LCU and Bethany. Sharlese gave her a little lift onto the changing table, not that she needed any help, and pulled a strap across her chest, covering her nipples and giving her a bit of modesty. A diaper was pulled from under the table and unfolded before being slid under Elizabeth with her legs lifted by her ankles before being lowered back down onto the padding. “Master Guildroy has been in contact with Miss Bethany to let her know your whereabouts and safety and guarantee her that you will be promptly returned home in the conditions mandated by your commands. He also recommended that I ensure your journey home be memorable and enjoyable.” With that comment, Elizabeth felt Sharlese slide the large, well lubricated diaper trainer between her legs. She was immediately greeted with locking confirmation vibrations and pleasant fullness that elicited a soft moan and a flood of excited memories. She was quickly powdered and the diaper sealed. It was a similar diaper to the one that Elizabeth had sent with her in her purse but seemed a bit thinner. She was then released from the table and stood in the centre of the nursery. A tight bra was pulled over her head, sports bra esque but designed more so to look like a training bra. It was simple black with purple roses covering the fabric and it held Elizabeth’s large chest tight and removed any sort of bounce she may have had in a normal bra. Next was a dark purple onesie with a black lace Peter Pan collar and lace cuffs around her bicep and thigh. It would be pretty cute on its own but Elizabeth hoped she’d get a bit more than just a onesie. Around the waist was a stiff band of canvas that acted as a belt and the Amazon curves of her hips guaranteed that when Sharlese pulled it tight, it would be locked in place. An integrated strap that started at her belly button, connected to the belt, was pulled up between her legs and tightened. It held the soft padding of the diaper against her skin and sank in the trainer so that it didn’t have any chances of moving. The strap was wide between her thighs and despite being in a thinner diaper, the tightness of the padding bowed her thigh apart a little and she’d have to be conscious of the waddle it would generate. The pain in Elizabeth’s bladder reared its ugly head. Now that her diaper was covered by the onesie she couldn’t help but be tempted to relieve some of that pressure, especially with the trainer. She didn’t want to soak the diaper completely and have to ride home in a wet diaper especially when she didn’t know how long the ride would be. The Nanny held up the next article to be added to her ensemble, a pair of black short dungarees. The shoulder straps had some very mild frills same with the leg holes and the front panel had Max’s crest embroidered into the left breast in all black thread. As Elizabeth lifted her leg to step in she very carefully opened up her bladder to let a small trickle into the waiting diaper. The trainer kicked to life on a low hum and carried through until she clamped back down. She wasn’t expecting the trainer to chirp loudly from inside of her diaper, causing her to turn red as Sharlese looked up with a knowing expression from her squatted position holding the dungarees open for her to step into. “You must have a bit of experience with the trainer.” Sharlese smirked seeing Elizabeth’s flushed face. “It is very tempting to play with isn’t it. If you’re not careful, you’ll be begging for diapers in no time.” Elizabeth wasn’t sure she’d be begging necessarily to be in diapers but the thoughts of the previous orgasms she had with the trainer excited her and deep down she knew it already had a hold on her despite the fact that she had to wet a diaper to use it properly. The dungarees were lifted and pulled over Elizabeth’s hips before Sharlese stepped behind her and pulled the straps over her shoulders and snapped them behind her back in the unreachable spot between her shoulder blades with a very audible click. Elizabeth knew immediately that the click was a locking mechanism and that she was now trapped in the shortalls. “A driver has already left an envelope with the key at your sister’s apartment for you. She was guided over to a vanity mirror where she could take in the look. It was cute, not too childish but also not fully adult. The onesie just looked like an adult singlet she’d wear to have the tight tucked look. Her breasts were still noticeable but dramatically reduced by the tight bra. The legs of the dungarees were short and tight and hugged her thighs a little lower than her favourite pair of short shorts she wore on the weekend to taunt her little charges with adult clothing. The diaper underneath would only be noticeable from its soft rustle as she moved around but it wasn’t immediately visually apparent. She was sat in the chair of the vanity and Sharlese went about blow drying and styling her hair into a complicated Viking braid that started from the perimeter of her face with a smaller braids on either side of her head that ran back over her shoulder and a large braid from the top centre and back. Her bangs were combed out and curled over her forehead in a thin curtain that landed just above her eyebrows. Again it was very cute but somewhere in between the childish and adult aesthetic. Sharlese used a small micro razor and some tweezers to finely tune her eyebrows just a little into a thinner shape and went about applying makeup. Elizabeth didn’t know why she was getting such a treatment for just returning home but again, the luxury of being cared for and primped and preened felt nice. The pain in her bladder was back again and she decided to release just a bit more while she sat in the chair as Sharlese worked on her. The trainer kicked up the level and she had to stifle a gasp as it fired up to her release. She had to remind herself after regaining composure to stem the flow lest she soak the diaper too early. Again the trainer chirped and Sharlese gave her a little smile in the mirror as she drew on some wings from the corner of her eyes. A very light blush was added and quick sealing powder finished the job. She looked like a porcelain doll when Sharlese was done. Next were socks and shoes. Some black thigh highs with purple lace around her thigh squeezed the little bit of pudge over the elastic band and the ensemble was completed with a pair of purple Velcro trainers with a black sole that completed the outfit. “We are a bit behind schedule so if you will follow me down to the car we can leave promptly.” Sharlese said as she held out a hand for Elizabeth. Elizabeth gingerly pinched the nanny’s fingers and was led out of the nursery and downstairs to the courtyard she had walked across dressless the previous night. Outside was one of the large black SUV’s she had seen in the garage the previous night. A tweener gentleman stood by the rear passenger door and opened it for Elizabeth as the pair approached. Sharlese gave a quick ‘thank you’ then looked at Elizabeth who did the same shortly after realizing she needed to use her manners. Elizabeth was not fully prepared for what she saw behind the door of the SUV. The seat that was available to her was a large car seat. Part of the rear row of seats had been removed to make room for the Amazon sized carrier permanently affixed inside the cabin. An automatic step folded down and Elizabeth was guided to the door and up the step before Sharlese’s hands took her hips and guided her down into the seat. The series of straps that bound her to the seat were intense. One across her hips, below and above her breasts, one over each thigh, cuffs on both calves and ankles, wrists bound to the sides of the bumpers that came up to hug her hips along with straps over her biceps and one well padded wide strap around her neck. Blinder wings came around either side of her head which meant she wouldn’t be able to see out either window on either side and the SUV was built limousine style with a wall dividing the driver from the passengers with a wide blacked out window in the centre. The final strap was a crotch strap that Elizabeth knew was included because what car seat is complete without one. Sharlese gave it an extra tug which gained a gasp from Elizabeth as she felt it push down on her fun button and immediately understood why little’s like their crotch straps so tight in the car. Sharlese closed her door and startled Elizabeth a little when she entered the cab in the seat next to her from the other side. She leaned forward and pushed a small button on a built-in screen in front of the restrained girl and shut the car door. A moment later she felt the engine startup as the monitor in front of her booted up some little tv show. She didn’t really pay attention at first then boredom set in and she began watching more and more intently. It was kind of silly and the built in adult sub contexts and innuendo that would be over the heads of a little were quite funny. She found herself forgetting about the pressure in her bladder as the car moved down the road. So much so that when the episode ended and the screen popped up a display of Max’s face she startled a little and lost her grip and let out a longer than previous streams which fired the trainer up at a new level before she managed to get herself under control. “How’s my little Fox this morning?” Max asked and Elizabeth realised it was a video call and he had surely heard the chirp of the trainer. She turned red and looked down as far as the car seat would allow her head to tilt in embarrassment. “I’m very good.” Elizabeth replied after getting her breathing under control. “How was Miss Sharlese? I’m sorry I couldn’t be there this morning. Next time Daddy will be there to help out, I promise.” He said with a knowing smirk. “She is quite wonderful, very adept. Maybe I’d be as good a nanny as her if I had that much experience.” Elizabeth said a little excitedly. As she heard Miss Sharlese clear her throat next to her which made her blush. “That’s good to hear. I had a wonderful evening with you and would like to see you again. I’m going to be a bit busy for a couple of days and was hoping we could schedule another date.” Max said. Elizabeth blushed crimson at the flattery and tried to hide her face again. “I’d like that.” She practically whispered back. “But I need to talk to Bethany first and make sure it’s okay.” She spoke up a bit. “I’ve already spoken to her this morning and she said as long as you want to come out, you’re allowed to. So long as you’re a good girl at home though.” Max said, causing Elizabeth to blush at being treated like a little being picked up for a playdate. “Now, I believe I caught you in the middle of something. I have the trainer set to step up the vibration levels with every wetting. Sharlese has told me that you had two accidents already this morning with trainer and that would mean that was your third. The fourth will be at maximum power but if you just trickle like you have been I doubt it will do much for you. And if you have a full release after the fourth, it will only punish you for holding it. I suggest your next accident finishes the job but you may know better than Daddy and might need to learn a lesson.” Max explained. Elizabeth knew that realistically the third hadn’t really relieved enough pressure and her bladder was aching. Along with the thoughts of the sweet orgasmic release she’d get if she fully let go it was very tempting. “Do you want to have your accident away from daddy? Somewhere a bit more private like the elevator at the apartment, granted you may be stuck in the elevator with someone which could be hard to explain. I could also torment you, set the schedule for the vibrator to start delivering punishment shocks as soon as you step out of the car. Lots of fun options to choose from. I’ve asked the driver to drive very slowly and carefully because of the precious cargo in the back seat. The drive may take over an hour to get you back.” Max explained. He was devious and his dominant takes of control from Elizabeth had her in throws of submission. “Sharlese, could you be a doll and give Little Lizzie her pacifier.” Max asked as Sharlese pulled out a purple pacifier and slid it into Elizabeth’s mouth without a moment of hesitation. “I’ll let you get back to your cartoons but I will be keeping an eye on you with the cameras as I have been this whole time.” Max said which made Elizabeth’s eyes open wide in disbelief. “Yes, sweetie, I have the whole mansion covered in cameras and especially the nursery. I watched quite a bit of your morning while the boring old heads ran circles around each other in my meeting. I will say you look absolutely precious and I hope you enjoy your gifts. Enjoy your ride and listen to your nanny.” Max said before his camera cut away and the cartoons flipped back on. Elizabeth was a little nervous to act right away. Her bladder was begging for the release and her libido kept taunting her with horny thoughts of the intense orgasm she’d get for wetting. But she kept trying to push down those thoughts as she knew Max was watching and Sharlese was right next to her. Her mind justified that she had her first experience with the trainer right in front of her older sister and littles constantly were being watched as they wet themselves and made stickies in their nappies. She decided to focus back on the cartoons to distract her mind and that did an excellent job. She made it another ten minutes into the car ride before she suddenly started feeling wet between the legs. In fact she had released her bladder without noticing at all and her first instinct was to clench back down but she refrained when she felt the powerful max level trainer fire up. She couldn’t stop herself now even if she wanted to, it felt so good to wet her diaper. Her breathing accelerated through her nose and she closed her eyes as the waves of pleasure washed over her while she nursed the pacifier for comfort. She was in her own little world as she soaked herself and the trainer praised her for wetting. It praised her so well that she came twice before she was finished and lay limp in the restraints of the car seat. “Good girl little Lizzie, good girl.” Sharlese praised her as she came into view and gently patted Elizabeth’s brow with a small pink handkerchief. Elizabeth blushed as she realised she had just put on a show for both Max and Sharlese. A small text box popped into the corner of the monitor in front of Elizabeth with the praise “good girl, my little fox,” the sender information only read Daddy and Elizabeth would have passed out from blush overload at the praise from Max as she gave the pacifier a few involuntary suckles. Now that her diaper was wet and she was more sensitive from the orgasms, the crotch strap really began to do a number on her. Each little bump felt like a hill and she had all these tingly sensations in her tummy. The squish of the fully soaked and warm diaper added a strange sensation. She knew she was sensitive from her orgasms and the added moisture from her accident made her feel like she was excessively horny wet in her diaper. It was an interesting feeling and the crotch strap kept making itself apparent as she involuntarily tried to start grinding her wet padding into the strap. She tried to keep the moans low and act like she was watching the cartoons in front of her as she suckled the pacifier. “Is the strap too tight sweetie?” Sharlese’s question came out of nowhere and broke her train of thought as she froze. Elizabeth shook her head ‘no’ and blushed. A bump in the road caused her to groan into the pacifier as the strap dug into the diaper with a dip. Sharlese’s hand came to the strap and gently cupped Elizabeth’s soaked padding through her shortalls. “I can loosen it for you if it’s making you uncomfortable.” Elizabeth could hear the smirk in her voice, she’d do the same thing to littles in the car when shapperoning them around. Elizabeth tried to hold herself back but found her head shaking ‘no’ almost immediately in response. She blushed thinking about how far she had fallen, she was desperately horny, something about this submissive side of herself had her constantly on edge and the humiliating attention was almost too much. “Suit yourself little fox.” Sharlese said as she pulled away to sit back in her seat. Elizabeth went back to watching the cartoons and very carefully tried to grind into the strap undetected, completely forgetting there was a camera pointed right at her with Max more than likely watching on the other end. Then she had a thought, if she wet just a little more, maybe the trainer would stir her a little more while she ground on the strap, she figured she was pretty empty after letting go previously but tried to relax her muscles and let out some more flow. To her surprise, she felt the padding get warmer again and the trainer started up on the lowest setting again. With the strap of the car seat aiding she was able to bring herself to the edge again and pushed forward with all she had into the strap to bring herself over. She crumpled back into the car seat again as the trainer chirped to let everyone know what she had just done. “Best be careful little fox, I didn’t put you in a thick diaper and you’re probably already coming close to capacity. If I had known you were such a heavy daytime wetter as you were at nighttime I would have chosen more noticeable padding. I’d hate for you to leak and spoil your nice clothes, if we need to pull over at a rest stop to change you just let me know.” Sharlese said which caused Elizabeth’s cheeks to burn anew at the thoughts of being changed in public and the humiliation of leaking through a diaper. Luckily there wasn’t much of the journey left and Elizabeth was feeling content so the tight strap between her legs only kept the embers of her arousal at a low warmth so she didn’t feel the need to act as desperately. There was a familiar turn and bump as they pulled into the apartment’s underground garage and she felt the SUV come to a halt. She heard Sharlese’s seat belt unbuckle and her door open, a moment later Elizabeth’s door swung open and Sharlese reached in to start undoing the restraints. Elizabeth was helped out of the car and stretched a little when she got on her own feet. Sharlese had a black and purple bag slung over her shoulder that matched Elizabeth’s current aesthetic. As she looked at the bag it became apparent that it was a diaper bag and the colour scheme matching her own outfit would only mean one thing to others. Her legs were a little wobbly and Sharlese took her arm to help support her. “You might have played a little too much in the car sweetie, we’ll have to be careful with the next ride.” She said before she pulled the pacifier from Elizabeth’s lips and deposited it in her side pocket. Elizabeth had completely forgotten about the pacifier until Sharlese’s finger had hooked into the ring and pulled it from her mouth. “Now, do you know how to get back home from here?” Sharlese asked, looking down at Elizabeth who seemed to shrink a little with the nanny’s gaze. She nodded her head ‘yes’ bashfully. “Then lead the way, I need to have a word with your big sister and drop off your personal effects.” Elizabeth was a little stunned that she had to escort the nanny back to her sister’s apartment but looked up with determination and stepped forward. The soggy padding between her legs was cooling a bit and the added mass of her multiple wettings, big and small, made her unknowingly waddle a bit to keep the damp padding away from her skin. Sharlese watched from behind as her hips swayed and her slightly wider gate gave away the diaper to anyone who was keen, which for the most part was anyone who had ever seen a diapered little. The parking garage was empty and only one couple coming out of the second elevator caught a glimpse of Elizabeth who darted into their open elevator as soon as the doors opened. Sharlese pushed the floor button for the elevator, she knew where she was going all along but part of the mind games when working with a little or submissive was letting them have some control and charge. Elizabeth hadn’t even noticed that Sharlese had pushed the right button for the elevator as she leaned against the wall, staring at the floor with rosey cheeks. She’d realise later that she had been played once she got over the embarrassment of almost being seen but in the moment she was buried in her own thoughts in her head. The elevator rose and the doors opened, Sharlese “tsked” a little under her breath, hoping to have some other resident join them for the elevator ride to see the adorable blush of Elizabeth. Alas, they departed the elevator and Elizabeth made a speedy exit and moved down the hallway to Bethany’s door. “I’ll have to get you a harness and leash for next time if you’re going to take off without your nanny like that little Lizzie.” Sharlese quietly said as she caught up with Elizabeth. Sharlese knocked on the door for Elizabeth who was a blushing mess holding her dungaree’s straps tightly from the comment. Each time Sharlese made a move to embarrass her she seemed to regress a little bit further. ‘She is quite the catch Master Guildroy’ Sharlese thought to herself before the door opened.

Definitely.

My younger daughter and I were the victims of a rather hilarious verbal attack last night, although I think she was more insulted than I was. She was supposed to be getting ready for bed, although at this point her bedtime is rather fluid, and I will note here that when it suits my wife, she's more than happy to take a relaxed approach to this particular rule - if they're sitting in bed watching some female-oriented drama where everyone is either cheating on each other, or has cancer, or both, then if my daughter stays up an extra half hour, it's no big deal. But last night, my wife was tired because she had done a lot of driving (for her) during the day, so there was no TV viewing scheduled, and she'd asked my daughter to get ready for bed. I ended up engaged in a game with her where one of us hides somewhere close to where we know the other is about to appear, and then we jump out and yell "Boo" and try to scare the crap out of the other person. We do this all the time and laugh our butts off, but last night my wife was finding it irritating, even though we were playing out in the hall and our bedroom door was closed. After my daughter got me when I was coming up the stairs with the dog, she went into the bathroom to brush her teeth, so I hid inside the doorway to the guest bedroom, and jumped out when she was coming up the hallway towards her bedroom, yelling the requisite "Boo!" and causing her to jump. She then attacked me physically, attempting to shove me back into the guest bedroom so that she could pull the door closed and then hold it shut (I know her tactics because they are my tactics). So, I was resisting being shoved into the bedroom, and both of us were laughing, which I guess had the dog, who was in our room with my wife, barking, because he wanted to get in on the action. So, my wife came shooting out the door of our bedroom, and yelled "APPARENTLY I'M SURROUNDED BY CHILDREN!" My daughter said something like "Chill, mom, I'm going to bed in a second..." And then my wife responded by pointing to her and then to me in succession, and saying "YOU"RE wearing a diaper, and YOU'RE wearing a diaper - I'm the only adult in this house right now, apparently, so I guess I have to be the heavy. GO TO BED!" Then she stomped away. This got both my eyes and my daughter's eyes wide, because my mother-in-law is staying with us and was somewhere in the house. Had she heard the exchange...? (One saving grace is that her hearing is not great...) My daughter gave me an indignant under-her-breath "What the hell... anyway, I'm not wearing a diaper, it's a pull-up...", and then we disengaged and I followed her to her room to turn out the lights. I, of course, was wearing a diaper, although under my jeans, because I'd just come back in from walking the dog, but I didn't want it announced, like a toast at a wedding, to my mother-in-law...

Hello dear readers Thanks for your comments. I have the next part ready to publish. It is not so long this time but as I want to keep it on a day-to-day Chapter length the first ones will be shorter. Annie Chapter 2 - Aquarium - Quite too busy while exploring the city When Lila got up, she was excited. A whole day of exploration and discoveries was coming up. While her parents were still sleeping and surely dreaming about boring adult stuff like working or creating rules for each other. But she was awake and could hardly wait anymore until the city was woken up by the tickling rays of the sun. “Lila, are you already out of bed?” whispered her mum as she saw her daughter sitting on the table watching the first cars deep under them. They were surely heading to an early start at work or returning from their night shift watching over the sleeping inhabitants in this ocean of concrete and briggs. “Yes, mum. What are we up to doing today?”, her girl asked excitedly, wishing her parents would finally leave their beds. “I thought we should go and check out the aquarium.”, her mother suggested. “It could be an interesting place to explore the maritime environment, don't you think?” Lila nodded again, still not entirely sure if it would be a comfortable place to spend their first day in the city. “You want to carefully wake your daddy. We have a breakfast buffet included, and it would be a great way to start the day together.” She smiled mischievously, thinking about all the different ways she could bring him back from his dreams to the real world. With a smile, she walked over to the still-snoring men. She was sitting next to her dad, kissing him awake. “Daddy they have prepared a buffet for us and Mum wants to take me to the aquarium.”, she began to speak. “And...”, she wanted to continue when her dad began to tickle her and dragged her under the blanket. “Honey, you don't want to sleep anymore?”, he concluded as her mum did just moments ago. “No, Daddy, I cannot! We have so much to do”, she explained to the sleeping adult and sounded so excited. ### Two hours later, they were finally arriving at the entrance. And Lila could not stand waiting anymore. She had waited so long and now was circling her parents while they were waiting patiently. “Do you need to go to the bathroom before we go in?”, her mum asked, just making sure she did not force her child into using her diaper. Maybe she should have brought the pull-ups along as well, just to give her the possibility to go on her own. But on the other hand, she was sure the baby-sized pull-ups even in the biggest size would not be a help if she really had an accident. In Lila's eyes, there was no need for that at all, her mother had put her in a fresh diaper after breakfast and the little but still teenage girl had already decided she was not too keen on using the public bathrooms. So without telling the embarrassing decision to her parents, she would just use her diapers if she needed to pee, as she did on the flight. “No! Mum, I don't have to go.”, she answered truthfully but forgot to mention that she already peed when they were in the metro. Dad booked them on a guided tour, for one and a half hours they could see the maritime world waiting for them behind thick glass windows. Their tour guide was already waiting for the kids and teens tour right at the entrance. “Are we all ready to leave?”, the young woman asked, wearing a bluish-colored shirt. And she started to explain interesting things about the place while showing them around. For the next ninety minutes, they were all quite busy walking through the site, watching fish in the tanks and even feeding them under the watchful eyes of the zookeeper. As Lila did not want to miss a single second of the interesting program, she again ignored her mum's attempt to help her if a toilet was close by. While her diaper between her legs was starting to get heavy. At about noon, the tour ended, and they were having lunch in a sunken-ship-themed restaurant. Lila joyfully was running around her Mummy. “Look what I found”, she led her parents to the free spot that was just separated by a glass window from the fishes. Long before her parents finished reading the menu, Lila had decided to go with the much more colorful kid’s menu and quickly found her loved spaghetti with tomato sauce and cheese. “Mummy, can you get me the spaghetti?” she ordered, immediately going back to look into the large tanks containing the big sharks and barracudas as if they were swimming right next to their sunken ship. As she was watching, her diaper was getting very wet now, and began to feel slightly uncomfortable. Should she ask her mum to change her? Did her parents even bring a spare nappy? Her mum seemed so determined to let her go to the toilet all day long, while she did not even once admit she had to go, when mum offered her to pee like a big kid. When they chose what they wanted, she decided to join her mum as they went over to pick up their plates and drinks. “Wait for a second”, her mother asked her to stop and was discreetly sliding her hand over the back of her summer dress, feeling the wet nappy underneath. “You are pretty wet aren't you”, her mum asked, noticing that her child seemed to ignore all her reminders to use the potty and had just peed herself instead. Lila blushed in embarrassment as the truth was becoming clear to her mum. “Does it still hold up until we have finished lunch?”, she asked, not willing to check and embarrass her any further in public. The little girl honestly did not know. She had not counted every time she just let herself trickle a little, when she felt the urge coming back. Yes, sure she had a lot of orange juice and hot chocolate for her breakfast, but she was wearing a real diaper after all. “No, I think I am fine.”, she told her mum, knowing that this was borderline lying to her. “Don't worry, I will change you immediately after our meal.”, Lila heard her mum and felt suddenly relieved, as this was how her parents were reacting when she wet her pull-ups a lot on her previous vacations. And while she was mussing up her child's hair, her kid was snuggling on her side. She stroked her back as her little girl took drinks from the fill-up station and also put the plates of hot, delicious-looking lunch on their plate before they headed to the checkout. Her mum thought about her little girl as she handed her the purse to pay and smiled as she was trying to sound like she was in charge. She likes playing grown-up, but at the same time simply refuses to go to the potty. Even on their past vacations, Lila just wet herself when it was hard to reach the restrooms in time. But now she did not even try anymore. She thought back to the time when they finally trained her on the last days before she started primary school. Her baby girl in those days was already asking to go poopy on her potty while she always wet herself, until her pediatrician gave her the advice to let her slow down and give her a little more time. So she got used to wearing her pull-ups to school and was still wetting herself every day in the first month. Then suddenly, even if her mum had her doubts, the stress of starting school cooled off, and she finally stopped as if it had never been a problem. Was this similar? She asked herself. Was she having too much stress and now found a way to step back? Could she at least take the stress from her girl while they were on the trip together? But what if she would lose the ability to make it to the potty again? School will be starting again next week and the summer holidays are still two months away. “You seem so worried?”, her husband tried to cheer her up as he noticed she had not even touched her plate. He was taking her wife's hand. Maybe she was worrying too much about her child, she finally decided. She was much happier since she was back in diapers, and that could not be bad for her child, couldn't it? She finally started eating her meal while the others were already halfway through their lunch. As Lila finished her meal, she again felt the need to pee. Without hesitation, she just relaxed and let it all out. But this time the wetness did not disappear anymore, and also her dress felt uncomfortable and wetness started to dribble down her legs. “What's up, darling?”, her mum asked her as she noticed her strange behavior. She was looking over to her daughter, noticing the crowing wet stains on her precious girl's dress. “Oh, I think you are leaking honey”, she revealed what Lila desperately wanted to hide. Her mum grabbed her big bag, helping her child to stand up. As comfortable as she was with peeing her pants, she did not want anyone to see what she did here sitting in the middle of the restaurant. She wished her mum would just help her to take her on her hips and let her cover her eyes in the shirt to feel more protected while she brought her over to the bathroom. “Mum, please!”, Lila begged for help as she felt all the eyes of the other guests on her wet bum. Finally, her mum at least put her arm around her and quickly dragged her out of the room while she could at least hide her face a little. “We just had an accident”, she heard her mum talk to one of the employees. And was hardly noticing the response as her mum dragged her to a room close by. The noise of the tourists slowly walking was coming to an end as the door closed. “Here, we have a special changing table to fit kids her age”, the man said that Lila identified as one of the service personnel of the restaurant. “Thanks, that is really a great help, what can we do to clean her chair?” she heard her mum asking. “Don't worry, this happens a lot even if normally to slightly younger guests, so the chairs have a plastic cover and can be cleaned easily.” He smiled, easing the worries on her mum's face. Lila quickly hid her face again and just let loose when she heard the door close and Mum's arms lifting her up, sitting her on the soft plastic surface as she unpacked her bag. Her mum had packed not only a spare diaper, but also another dress that she could wear instead of her now wet one. “Oh, this is soaked, why did you not go to the restroom with me when I asked you to”, her mother grumbled slightly as she undressed her. She did not notice as her daughter’s eyes sank in shame. “Or at least you could have told me how wet you really are?” Lila sighed at the hard words she no longer could take. Without being able to stop it, she felt some tears running down her cheeks. The seconds passed. Was she too strict with her girl? She clearly was desperate now. Her mummy instinct took over. She could not stand seeing Lila in tears anymore, even if this meant that her daughter's potty training was on the line. Suddenly, her mum took a napkin and dried her tears. “Baby it is not a problem at all.”, she quickly added as she noticed that in trying to let her be the teenager, she had overestimated what Lila could bear by a lot. Maybe I should have checked on you as I did all the previous years. And she could still hear the feelings of worry and anger in her voice. As innocently as she could, Lila looked her mum in the eyes. “You want me to help you more, don't you”, her mum tried to find out why her daughter suddenly ditched her potty training. Her child nodded, while she was not even able to look her in the eyes. Should we step back some more to make it more comfortable for you on the vacation, she asked again, and this time she could mumble a soft yes as her answer. Her mum seemed to notice that she was lifting a lot of weight off her small daughter's shoulder. And she simply kissed her kid to get rid of the rest of her tears. Taking some of the wipes that were provided, she quickly cleaned the diaper area, rolled up the sodden now yellow-tainted diaper, and placed a fresh one under her bum. Just as in the airport, she was quickly back in something clean and comfy. Finally, Lila could smile again as her mum put the new dress over her head. “Mummy please, can you hold my hand”, she asked her big guardian as they left the room some seconds later. And as she grabbed her fingers to hold her mum she felt the connection to her parents again and the child in her was back, enjoying that they still could stay here while she was dancing back to their seats. “Thanks”, she heard her mum say as they passed the waiter that helped them out before. “Sure, we are here to help.”, he told her, while Lila greeted him with a big smile. “You are feeling better too?”, he asked her, clearly not thinking that she was thirteen. The little girl who could not keep her legs from tumbling in joy nodded. “You were really brave, so if you want and your mum allows it, you can choose a little treat for yourself from the kid's dessert menu”, he told Lila. Handing her a printed sheet that was a mixture of a menu with some fish to color in between. “Thanks, we would love to”, her mum said, as she took two separate sheets for herself and her husband from the adult menu stack. And with a smile, they returned to their table and ended up eating a yummy dessert as well. While they headed out exploring in the afternoon, Lila noticed some changes. Her mum now ended all the futile reminders of the possible stops at the restrooms. Instead, in a much more embarrassing manner, started to check her daughter's diaper whenever she could do it without making her child sink in shame. And while the first checks were embarrassing, she noticed that now where the procedure no longer involved her being responsible for her diaper, she started to relax even more and just trusted her parents to be there for her. ### The bright sunlight shining on the bed tickled Lila awake. The clock on the TV showed her it was just a little past six in the morning. The childlike girl felt incredibly groggy, like she had not rested at all. They had spent the entire last day at the aquarium, and it was a great experience. So by the time they left in the evening, every member of the family was exhausted, and the small girl closed her eyes even before her mum finished changing her for the night. With her feet, she pushed the covers slightly down and turned to her Mom, who was still sleeping peacefully next to her, holding her with her arm. Lila and Maria shared the same queen-sized bed, while Dad had a separate bed next to them for himself. As she moved her legs a little, she noticed the warm and slightly squish diaper around her booty. While her pajamas were still dry and comfy. The girl wondered if she had a wet night, but then she remembered she peed her diaper at night as she was much too tired to get up, and she was pretty sure she did that not just once. It still was comfy, and Lila did not see any need to get changed immediately. She actually just wanted to drift back to sleep and get at least a couple more hours of rest. But as much as she tried, she could not. For once the sun was much too bright and second there was this dull ache in her belly. What should she do? All her potty training told her she should remove the sodden diaper and head to the bathroom. But then her Mom would have to get up from her deep sleep and change her into a fresh diaper for the rest of her night, or she would risk a wet bed in the morning when she sleeps without her protection for one or two hours. She thought how easy this was in the airport, what if she could just go in her diaper now and worry when her mum was up? But no, when she goes poopy in her bed with the toilet so close by, her Mom would get angry for sure? Cleaning up after she messed in her diaper was quite a smelly work, after all. And while she had her mum’s approval on the trip to push it all in her diaper, that was just because they were in a hurry, and she could not hold it any longer. Maybe she could pretend that she pooped in her diaper while she was sleeping, but ... no, Mom would never believe that. She rolled back facing her mum as the ache got worse. She finally had to wake her, as she was certain it was the only way out of her dilemma. Lila crawled closer to Mom’s side and whispered, “Mummy wake up .... Mummy please ... Mummy!“ “Good morning, dear.” she finally said with sleep still in her eyes, letting her daughter's head down on her shoulder. “Why are you up so early? I’m still pretty tired myself.” “Mummy!.” replied Lila in desperation as she now needed to go really urgently. “I can't sleep anymore because I desperately need to go to the toilet. My belly is aching a little.” Mom stroked her hair for a moment as she thought about it. “Why don't you just go poopy in your diaper again … it's easier, and you don't need to worry.”, her Mom suggested as if that was the obvious solution for her problem, And yawningly she added. “I promise, I will change you when we both get up later.” With her mum’s promise in her mind, Lia wiggled around to find a comfortable position for pooping herself. But this was a little hard as she was laying in bed and her body is not used to doing that. Surely, she could just squat down, but she really wanted to stay in her bed, snug and close to her mum. Her mum just smiled at her, come I help you, she mumbles and as she rocked her a little on her tummy. And as she pushed her legs slightly apart, she lost her control and she noticed a little log of poop already leaving her. “Just do it, and you can get back to sleep”, she padded her as she began to climb out of bed. Lila closed her eyes and pushed. Moments later, the tummy was soft and relaxed, and just the warm babyish feeling on her booty was a reminder of what she had done. “I will close the curtains”, explained Mum as she got up for a moment and opened the window a little bit. Before laying back next to Lila. A scent of poop came from under their blankets as Lila opened her eyes again. Are you feeling better, she asked as she rolled Lila closer to herself and kissed her forehead. Lila, still embarrassed about what she just did, was enjoying her mum’s attention. And before she started to rock her back to sleep, she pulled back the waistband of her diaper and confirmed that her little girl indeed pooped herself. You had to go quite urgently, that must have been uncomfortable all night for your little belly? She assumed, now starting to rock her softly, “Are you feeling better now.” Lila nodded. “At least the ache in my tummy is gone”, she smiled. “With diapers on, it is much easier to just go if you need to pee or poop instead of holding in, don't you agree.” “You are not mad at me for not trying harder to avoid a potty accident like that. I thought I should have taken off my diaper and headed to the toilet instead.” “Baby no! Please don't take it off yourself. You still wet your bed. I prefer it if you wake up with a poopy diaper over changing your wet bedding. Is pooping yourself so uncomfortable for you.” She wanted to hear the feelings of Lila. “No, using it does not feel bad at all. It pushes away the anger when something does not go as I liked it and brings back all these nice memories from when I was little and did not care. Maybe I miss being that carefree little girl.” her child in her arms confessed. Mum gave her Lila a kiss on the cheek. “I also would love to have my play and cheerful kid back, and I missed caring for my baby. So it is never a chore for me to clean you up when you are wet or messy.” She slowly patted her daughter's belly. “Can you promise your mummy to be carefree about that and just go potty in your diaper whenever you need to?” Lila nodded with a childish smile. “And if you want some more cuddles or something else, however childish it may seem, tell me or your dad, ok?” The smiling girl nestled down into Mum’s shoulder. She could relax with her mum so close, and after the talk with her mother, she felt the ease of mind about her current embarrassing potty habits. Lila still felt the warm mess on her bum, and the oddly smoothing feeling again let her forget all her teeny worries, and she drifted back to sleep

It’s certainly a safe way so long as you don’t sleep on an electric blanket 🤣 My experience has been that it’s definitely a kind of learned behaviour (as opposed to incontinence) but also over time it becomes easier for it to occur.. Initially, a lot of stars need to align for it to happen. I suspect you need to be very used to doing it and you need to feel “safe” and that it’s “ok”. Early on, that may mean that you only bed wet in diapers. I think my very earliest bedwetting episodes only happened when I was not only diapered, but already somewhat-wet. The bedwetting signal seemed to slowly grow stronger over time though. This culminated in me attempting to sleep in a bed without a nappy on for a weekend. The first night was sleepless with many trips to the bathroom. The second night was sleepless because I was woken by cold, wet sheets at 2am and had to strip the bed (having proved the point, I put a nappy on for the balance of that night). As an aside, I found it impossible to do more than doze fitfully in a wet bed. The clean up is also hellish (assuming you don't want a bedroom smelling of stale pee). It was several months of "24/7" before the first "bedwetting" (diaper use whilst asleep) occurred. It was probably closer to 3 years before wet beds started appearing regularly. They're still not an every-night thing but they are common enough now. A dry week would be unusual and I know from testing that going undiapered will not necessarily keep me dry.

I have not found dependency an issue for me. I wear during the day because I want to not because I have to. That may have helped. But, for me, I have become a non-reliable bedwetter through time and patience. It was a combination of good diapers, hydrating before bed, and riding it out. In about six months I was sleep wetting a few times a week. That’s about where I am now 8 months in. Looking forward to more frequent and heavier wettings as time goes on but I’ll just wait and see. But, I don’t worry about an accident if I choose not to wear during the day.

Chapter Five Ai Sinclair had no memory of wearing a diaper. She had no memory of wetting one. She probably had, because that was what babyhood was like. But unlike most kids she met in her travels, Ai didn't have parents. She never had a babyhood, as far as she could remember. If she thought hard about it, her imagination could fill in the gaps: the tension of a blanket swaddling her shoulders, or the sight of looking up at someone as they wiped her skin clean. But Ai had lived for a long time in her bubble, and she'd never known anything about aging until she'd left. That was the thing about bubbles. They're just... different. But nothing was quite so different as the feeling of soaking her diaper. The heat on her skin. The sodden padding, growing thicker and thicker. The uncontrollable bliss... the blissful lack of control. And it seemed to go on forever. It didn't stop. Never in her entire life had she peed for so long, and never with anybody watching her. Ai's humiliation got the better of her, and she closed her eyes. She didn't want to see the teacher or her classmates. She wanted to pretend they didn't exist; out of sight, out of mind. But with another one of her senses stripped away, others lit up like fireworks. The tingling between her legs. The warmth on her cheeks. The sharp inhales and exhales as Ai lost control of her breathing. Her fingers trembled in the mittens. Her stomach fluttered with excitement. And it just... didn't... stop... Soon, the diaper between her legs was heavy and warm and pleasant. Her mind was swirling with a thousand feelings, but not a single thought. Sweat beaded on her forehead and she opened her glossy eyes. Everyone was still there; they didn't disappear. They were still watching her, and Ai had never been so embarrassed. "Well, it seems someone had a little accident," Ms. Lady teased. Her voice felt like daggers, slicing up Ai's pride into ribbons. Ai wanted to argue that it wasn't her fault, that Ms. Lady wouldn't let her use the restroom, but her words were frozen in her throat. Her brain wasn't sending the right signals anymore. All she felt was... good. So, so good. Ms. Lady went back to teaching the class, and Ai sunk lower into her seat. The diaper was so squishy beneath her, and Ai made the mistake of squeezing her legs together. The plastic crinkled and a shiver zipped up her spine. Involuntarily, she did it again. And again. And again. Ai hung her head in shame, and in an effort to mask her shallow breathing. To hide her pink cheeks. To steer her focus away from Ms. Lady and the classroom and toward the willpower to stop what she was doing. But there wasn't enough willpower in all of Ai's mind or body. For the next ten minutes, she squirmed and crinkled and flooded herself with undeniable pleasure. At the same time, and somewhat paradoxically, the students seemed both entranced with Ai and entirely dismissive of her. No one was watching her, but any time she looked away, she could feel the attention of her classmates. She could almost hear the things they were thinking about her. How Ai was just one step away from Henry's fate: a mushy-bottomed toe sucker. Ai's breathing was still shallow, and every now and again little gasps would escape her lips. How she longed to cover her mouth with her hand. "That's all for today, class," Ms. Lady finally said, shaking Ai from her introspection. The ropes around her wrists unfurled, as they did with everyone else in the classroom. "Tomorrow's class is about etiquette, and I expect you all to be dressed appropriately," Ms, Lady said, sharply pointing her words at Ai. Unbound at the ankles and the wrists, Ai could get up. But getting up was a little dizzying. She was still adapting to all the sensations of her wet diaper, and even lifting her bottom up off the chair caused so many new ones. The tug on her hips, as the heavy padding sagged between her legs. The squishiness in all new places. Finally, Ai gave up and sat back down, resting her head on her mittened hands. "Hey there new girl." Ai lifted her head just enough to see Rin standing over her desk. She was leaning on one foot, twirling her hair with her finger. She smiled sweetly. Sickly so. "Seems like you really had a good time in class," she teased. "Shut up," Ai muttered, putting her head back down. Every muscle in her body felt tense and weak at the same time. "You must really love your diapers, hm? Pissing yourself like that in front of everyone, then moaning like a little slut?" Ai raised her head and glared at Rin. She knew a slut wasn't exactly a bad thing to be, but Ai didn't have much experience. Sex wasn't a thing in her original bubble, but Ai knew enough to be offended by Rin's implication. "What's your problem?" Ai said sharply. "I didn't do anything to you." "My problem? I don't have a problem. Do you?" Rin asked rhetorically. "It seems like you had a really good time, that's all. Did you like it when I stared at you like that? When I watched your widdle assident?" The last two words from Rin's mouth were twisted into baby talk, and Ai was struggling to keep up with her logic. Her head was swimming. Or drowning. She couldn't even tell. She tried to get a word in between Rin's, but the other girl just kept talking. It was like one unbroken sentence, moving from topic to topic, and Ai couldn't find a spot to interrupt. It was kind of hypnotic. "It makes sense that a pervert like you would be obsessed with me though; I'm kind of a big deal around here. You're lucky that I'm even talking to a little diaper dork like you." The fact that Rin was in a diaper too didn't seem to matter. "And not only are you a pervy little dork, but you're rude too! You haven't even thanked me for my attention." "I'm not thanking you for anything," Ai said fiercely. She knew different bubbles had different rules, but she always stood up for herself when she thought she was being treated unfairly. Communication was important, after all. "Aww, you think you're such a big girl," Rin cooed. "But this behavior of yours isn't very mature at all. It's rather childish, actually." "Because acting like a bully is so grown up?" Ai shot back. Then a low chorus of "ooo"s flooded the room. Ai looked around to find the rest of the class watching from the sidelines. Somehow, their argument had become a spectacle. "Oh, oh, you think I'm a bully?" Rin crossed her arms, and looked over her shoulders to the left and to the right, at the gathered crowd. "You hear that, y'all? This baby slut diaper dork thinks that I'm a bully. It sure sounds like she's never known what it means to be bullied before, doesn't it?" Her attention shifted back to Ai and she smirked confidently. "Maybe I should show you what bullying looks like?" Ai felt a pang of anxiety. Most of the people in her travels were rather kind; there was no history of abuse or violence or neglect. Every now and again Ai's ethics and morals didn't quite line up with the worlds she visited, but almost all of them were respectful of their differences. Once or twice, in extreme cases, she was asked to leave. But what happened at the King's Kingdom and what was happening now seemed so disproportionately violating. "Whatever," Ai sighed, trying to tone down her frustration. She got to her feet with every intention of walking out of the classroom, but the weight on her hips was startling. The diaper sagged halfway down her thighs, and she almost lost her balance. Her agitation was whisked away, replaced with embarrassment and fervor. Ai blushed deeper than before. "Oh? Whatever? Did you mean, whatever you say, Miss Rin. I'm a little diaper brat who needs to be put in her place? Is that what you meant?" Rin stepped directly in Ai's way and gave her a shove. Ai held onto one of the desks and managed to stay standing, but the heavy padding between her legs caused her to lose her footing. With another shove, Rin pushed Ai backward, away from the door and toward the crowd of students. They dispersed, giving space for Rin and Ai to have their tussle. "Oh my gosh, what is your problem!" Ai said angrily, losing her composure. Every step in her soaking wet diaper was a rush of new sensations, each one stealing more and more of Ai's breath. So when Rin stepped toward her again, Ai panicked and shoved her right back. Ai had been in fights before, but none were so inelegant. They were demonstrations, like a show of strength. Or they were customary, like a call and response. Sometimes fights were acceptable, sometimes they were necessary, and sometimes they were lauded. But this was none of those. This was a total mess. Rin didn't strike or attack Ai; she tugged on her clothes and pulled her hair. Ai, realizing very quickly how immobile she was in such a thick diaper, mirrored Rin. In the end, Ai was knocked onto the floor, landing on her padded behind with a squish and a shiver. She was out of breath and her body tingled in an unbelievably pleasant way. Her face was red with embarrassment. Rin stood over Ai with her hands on her hips and a wicked smile on her face. Rin stepped forward twice, so that each of her feet was on either side of Ai's hips. From that position of power, she descended and sat her ass upon Ai's stomach, pinning her in place. She grabbed Ai's wrists, one in each hand, and held those down too. "Pinned on the ground by a girl in a diaper? You're so pathetic." Ai was awash with conflict. On one hand, everything Rin said sounded like something on a radio drama. That's where she learned about bullies to begin with, since she had never gone to a proper school. It was so stupid, it was almost laughable. But on the other hand, Ai's body was flooded with gooey emotions and her soggy diaper begged to be squished and rubbed. And a girl was on top of her? For the first time in a very long time, Ai wanted to kiss somebody. "Y-you're... um... lemme..." Ai's conflict was a terribly slow tug of war. It was humiliating, and the entire class was looking down on her. Literally and figuratively. "Tsk tsk... you really should learn your manners," Rin teased. "If you'd just thank me for all this attention..." Ai shook her head; it was all her determination would allow. Rin sighed, clucking her tongue in that universally chastising way, that way that everyone understood. "Well, lucky for you, I'm really good at teaching little brats how to be polite and grateful." She kept Ai pinned to the ground and looked up at the gawking students. "Aren't I?" Rin asked. There were a few quiet mumbles, all of which sounded affirmative, and some nods of the head. But there were a lot of blushing cheeks. Before Ai could come up with a solution, Rin pulled Ai's wrists down to her sides and spun around on her tummy. With her knees on either side of Ai, she pinned her arms in place and arched her back. Rin's diaper was on full display, only inches from Ai's face. It was thick and swollen, forcing Rin's legs apart. Ai could see the faint line halfway up her backside, where the pure white padding changed to a muted yellow. "Goodness, what a cute little print," Rin teased, lifting Ai's dress. "Everybody, come look at the new kid's diaper! It's like it was made for a baby!" Then Rin pressed her hand to Ai's diaper, causing her to shiver involuntarily beneath the bully. The rush of pleasure was intense, but it quickly capsized to violent waves of humiliation. "Oh my gosh, did you all see that?" Rin mocked. "She's like a little toy, look! I push the button~" Rin pressed her hand expertly against Ai's diaper and grinned, pressing fingers into the padding like a skilled artist crafting from clay. Then she flattened her palm, forcing the sodden, swollen padding up against Ai's intimates. Ai shivered, and let out the cutest little noises. "And she moves and makes sounds!" Rin went on. "Maybe that's why you don't have any manners, diaper dork; maybe you're just a toy who doesn't have that function. Maybe you're just for playing with? Is that right?" "Lemme... up..." Ai tried to throw Rin off of her, with no success. It felt insurmountable, like moving a mountain. "No, no," Rin tsked. "Toys don't give orders. Toys get played with. You don't think you still have any power, do you?" She squeezed Ai's diaper again and Ai whined a needy whine. "You know, if you'd just used your manners, I might have even mistaken you for a sweet little girl. But you're not, are you? You're a naughty little toy." Each of Rin's ministrations had been precise, planned, and theatrical. What Rin did next was much more chaotic: she began to knead at Ai's diaper like a cat kneading a blanket, like the padding was dough. And as she kneaded, she began to rock on her knees, shifting her diaper closer and closer to Ai's face. Ai couldn't focus on any one thing. The pleasure from the soggy diaper. The words Rin used to humiliate her. The sight of everyone looking down on her. The gentle press of plastic against her nose, as Rin sat back onto her face. She knew she had gotten into this mess herself, but the way out was shrouded in smoke and mirrors. "You're the most helpless little diaper dork I've ever met," Rin jeered. She seemed to be having the time of her life. "Even a brat in a diaper like me can top you. Could this be any more humiliating for you?" Ai thought, with resounding certainty: no. Rin thought, with resounding certainty: yes. "You're clearly at the bottom of the social ladder. You're clearly helpless. You're clearly just a toy to be played with. So I should treat you exactly the way that I'd treat any of my other stuffies. Any of my other toys." There were some gasps from the people that had gathered; some knowing sounds and mumbles. "I can't believe you're going to let me do this to you, diaper dork. But you're such a pervert that you're probably getting off on it." Rin leaned forward and her diaper pressed ever-closer to Ai's face. Ai tried to turn her head, but the soft squish of Rin's diaper pressed into her cheek. It left an imprint in the padding, contouring around Ai's nose and chin. The faint smell of pee from inside Rin's diaper wafted around Ai's face. Ai was about to thrash again, to push Rin off, when the bully pressed on the front of her diaper and Ai moaned involuntarily into the bully's padding. Rin arched her back a bit more and the seat of her diaper began to swell. The padding was soft and mushy as it warped around Ai's face, covering her lips and her nose. Then the smell of pee mixed with something new and Ai realized: Rin was pooping her diaper while sitting on her face! Ai reeled and whimpered, kicking and twisting to throw Rin off, but Rin held her ground. Grunting and pushing, the diaper grew bigger and bigger. It was almost comical, the way her diaper ballooned out. It continued to swell until Ai's whole face pressed into it like a fluffy pillow. She could still breathe, but Ai almost wished she couldn't. "Wow. You just stayed down there the entire time," Rin teased. She sounded a little out of breath, and her cheeks sparkled with perspiration. "You must really enjoy this!" As Rin leaned back, she arched her back and raised her arms to stretch, using Ai's face as a seat for her mushy bottom. The crowd mumbled and gossiped and made declarations about the kind of girl Ai Sinclair truly was. Now she had a reputation, and it would only become cemented in the coming minutes. Rin leaned forward again. This time, when she began to rub Ai's diaper, it wasn't to tease or interrupt Ai's arguments; this time, it was with intent. "How pathetic," Rin's voice rung in Ai's ears. "It's one thing to be a little diaper dork, or a helpless toy to play with. But to let a girl fill her diaper on your face? To whimper and moan while you bury your face into my stinky diaper?" Ai hated Rin. And not because Rin was teasing her, but because Rin was right. Because ever since she'd wet her diaper, the feelings inside of Ai had been overwhelming. Lust and desperation she had never known. Sex itself was an uncomfortable urge at best, something Ai had gone her entire life without much interest in. And now, in a soaking wet diaper, with her face plunged into the seat of another girl's messy diaper, she was more turned on than ever. Even Rin's taunts weren't enough to quell her libido. For the first time in her known life, Ai really wanted to cum. She hoped her pride and self-control would be enough to triumph over her desire, but nothing had ever stopped nor could ever stop Ai Sinclair from getting what she wanted. Not even herself.

Chapter Three Ai was still trembling, even fifteen minutes after the spanking was over. The queen had taken her by the hand and led her down the halls of the empty castle. She was talking about something, but Ai was struggling to focus. Her body was alight with adrenaline, but she was tired at the same time. "Now, Ice and Claire, it's not proper for the king's justice to be suspended, so we certainly need a reason for it, otherwise you'll be right back on his lap before you know it. You're such a small little thing, though… I think we can come up with something." Ai nodded. She didn't know what she was agreeing to, but anything was better than getting spanked like that again. She had never felt so helpless in her entire life, and nothing had hurt her quite so badly. Sure, she'd had a few concussions. She broke her leg once, and two of her fingers. But there was something about that spanking that made all that seem like gentle bruising. Perhaps that was just the way spankings felt, or perhaps the king himself had something to do with it. The queen led Ai up the stairs of a tower and into the room at the top. There was a bed with curtains above and around it. There was some white furniture that really seemed to bring out the brightness of the grey stone walls. But most importantly, there was a balcony. It overlooked the forest, but not the way she had come. That's when Ai realized she didn't have her backpack. Or her compass. "Your Majesty, could I please—" "Ah, ah," the queen interrupted. "You know better than to call me that." Ai had to pause to remember what it was the queen was talking about. The spanking and the conversation that followed were nothing but a blurry memory to her. When Ai finally pieced it together, a blush came over her cheeks. "Um... Mommy..." Ai muttered. She had never called anyone that before, not once in her life. She knew what a Mommy was; she'd seen it enough times. The parent to a child. Specifically a woman, and specifically a very young child. A child with no autonomy, who relied on the parent for every little thing. Ai felt embarrassed, having put herself in that category. But there were more pressing concerns. "Could I please have my backpack?" Ai asked. "When you're done with your discipline, you can have your belongings back," the queen said simply, and Ai knew there wasn't room to argue. "Let's get you dressed, Ice and Claire," the queen said, motioning to the bed. "It's inappropriate for you to be wearing clothes you picked out." "My clothes are in my backpack," Ai argued, but the queen didn't seem deterred at all. She went over to a wardrobe in the corner and Ai sat on the edge of the bed. She couldn't go through all those spankings again, so she had to figure out a way to get her backpack back. Maybe it was still in the throne room. The queen turned around with a puffy pink dress in her hands, the kind of dress Ai had only ever seen on little girls in fancy houses. And, well, the castle was kind of a fancy house. But Ai wasn't a little girl. "I don't really like dresses," Ai tried to tell the queen. "Dresses are easy access for the king and me, Ice and Claire. And that's important, because you may need to be checked on." Easy access as a term sent a shiver up Ai's spine. Why did they need access to anything under her skirt? The only thing that came to mind was more of those spankings... was the dress a reminder to behave? With a reluctant sigh, Ai reached for the dress. "Oh, no no," the queen said sweetly. "I'll get you dressed. I'm your Mommy, after all, aren't I?" Ai didn't answer, but that was answer enough. The taller woman stripped off Ai's shirt and pants, leaving her in nothing but her wet underwear. Ai blushed, looking down at her feet and covering her bare chest with her arms. "These too," the queen said, pulling down Ai's panties. Ai reached to grab them, but the queen slapped her hands away. "Please, I can change myself..." "Nonsense," the queen said simply. Then she unfolded a pair of underwear that Ai didn't recognize, not at first. They weren't made of the same kind of material of any panties Ai had ever seen. But when the woman prompted her to step into them, she realized why. They were the same kind that little kids wore when they were potty training. "Wait, hold on. Why do I have to wear those training pants?" Ai asked incredulously. "Well, you got your other panties all wet," the queen said simply. "Well, yeah, but... you don't think I wet those, do you? That awful forest nymph threw me in the river!" Ai was blushing furiously. "Then you'll be able to keep your pull-ups dry," the queen countered. "Pull-ups?" Another name for the training pants, no doubt. Ai shook her head. "Absolutely not! You have the wrong idea!" "If you won't do as you're told," the queen said coldly, "you can go over Daddy's lap instead." Ai froze. Her heart rate doubled and panic zipped up her spine. The fact that the woman had referred to the king as her Daddy was just another straw on the camel's back for Ai Sinclair, but fear gripped her like a noose. She was too scared to even breathe, for just a moment, and stars appeared at the edges of her vision. "What will it be, Ice and Claire?" the queen asked. Ai looked down at her feet shyly and stepped into the training pants. *** Over the next few days, things only got worse for Ai Sinclair. The queen had an endless supply of little girl dresses, and she did everything from feeding Ai to giving her a bath. She would give Ai cups with lids full of milk, and the milk would make Ai's thoughts fuzzy for a few hours. But the worst part was, the queen seemed intent on getting Ai to have an accident. At first, it was just a lot of water and milk, so much that it was an inconvenience. Ai had to get up every hour to use the bathroom. Then the queen would plan walks around the garden, and try to keep Ai out for long periods of time. Then the queen started locking the bathroom door, so that Ai had to ask permission. But through all the trials, Ai always managed to keep her pull-up dry. Whenever Ai had any free time, she searched for her backpack. It wasn't in the throne room, and the castle was massive. Finally, the queen let it slip that it had been put in the royal bedroom for safekeeping, but the door was always locked. Objectively, Ai could always ask Daddy for the rest of her spankings. But she had seventeen sets of ten remaining, and any time she even thought about it she would panic. As much as Ai hated it, the reasonable way out wasn't a viable one. She had to find another way, and it came in the form of a silver lining. Of all of Queen Errata's inexplicable behaviors, Ai hated one more than the rest: though the queen would talk constantly to Ai, she never once listened. Even if Ai tried to engage in the conversation, she was dismissed or actively ignored. It reminded Ai of how a child talks to a doll or a cat. But it was from one of these soliloquies that Ai got an idea. "I don't see why you insist on keeping up this big girl act," the queen sighed, after yet another trip to the bathroom. "There are a lot of perks that only a little girl can get." Ai ruminated all day on what the queen meant by that, and if maybe one of those perks could get her closer to her backpack. That night, before the queen got Ai ready for bed, Ai tugged on her dress as cutely as possible and played her hand. "Mommy..." she said shyly. "Um, I was thinking about what you were saying. And at night, I get kind of scared all alone in here..." "Oh?" The queen didn't take Ai for a woman that was afraid of the dark. But the queen truly did see Ai as a little girl. "You said little girls get perks, so, um... if I were a little girl, would I be able to sleep with you and Daddy?" The queen's eyes lit up and she enthusiastically nodded her head. This lasted only a moment before she regained her composure. "Absolutely, Ice and Claire. Little girls get to sleep with Mommy and Daddy. Of course... a little girl must be properly dressed for bed, as not to have any night time accidents in the royal bed. And your pull-ups are certainly not sufficient." Ai knew part of this plan would involve a few embarrassing concessions, but she wasn't entirely sure what that looked like. The queen wanted to treat Ai like a little girl, to make Ai reliant on her, and Ai was determined to do her best to prove otherwise. What would happen when she gave up? "Yes, Mommy..." Ai muttered shyly. "Whatever you think is best..." Those magic words were far more potent than manners; those were the words that the queen wanted taught to all royal charges. She smiled blissfully, because she was getting everything she wanted. But there was mischief in her eyes. "Up on the bed," she said. Ai sighed and went over to the bed, sitting on the edge. Her feet barely touched the ground, and the bed was bigger than ones she was used to. This whole world made her feel a little smaller than the others, or maybe it was the constant doting from the queen. The queen went to an ever-present dresser on the far side of the room. When she returned, the queen set down some stuff on the bed beside Ai: a square of folded plastic and a pair of pink fluffy ovals covered in bells. Ai recognized the diaper at first glance. She had never seen one that big, and it didn't really look anything like the others she had seen for actual babies, but she just knew. She felt a sinking feeling in her stomach and an indescribable anxiety filled the space. The other things, though… Ai searched through the mental catalogue she had accumulated over her travels, but the results came back empty. She looked nervously up at Mommy for answers. "Queen Mommy and King Daddy are sound sleepers, and we like to sleep in. So a nighttime diaper is a must for my little Princess-to-Be, and some mittens for your hands to keep you from fidgeting." Ai didn't know what mittens were, but it seemed like they were meant to keep her from using her fingers. But then how was she supposed to get her backpack? Ai felt like the ground was falling out beneath her feet. She had to do something. "But I'm... I don't need those, um... I don't fidget, really. I won't touch anything, I swear." And anyway, how were bells supposed to help her stop fidgeting? Ai felt like she was missing something crucial to winning her argument, but challenging the queen felt too dangerous. "Well, just as Daddy doesn't make alliances with kingdoms he hasn't visited, we can't have you sleeping in the royal bed without proving that you won't be a problem. Doesn't that make sense, Ice and Claire? Now, lay down upon the bed, sweet girl." "But... I, swear, I'm—" "Unless you'd rather sleep alone in the dark?" the queen offered. Ai hesitated. She was giving up the only card she had, giving the queen everything she wanted, and there was a good chance she wouldn't be able to get what she needed out of it. But if she went back on her deal, it was only a matter of time. Sooner or later, she'd have an accident and the queen would get her way anyway. So, with a defeated sigh, Ai laid back on the bed and looked up at the canopy. "That's very royal behavior." Which was, Ai supposed, the highest compliment that her Mommy could pay her. As Ai pondered her next move, her Mommy stripped her of the pull-up and lifted her legs. She unfolded the diaper and slid it beneath Ai's bare bottom before pulling it up between her thighs. "You're never going to have to worry about accidents again, my little girl. And there are so many perks," the Queen cooed. Ai was only half listening, if at all. It was the first time Ai could remember anyone putting her in a diaper, and it felt so routine. The familiarity was dizzying, like a book she had read a thousand times. Not a single word was new, not a single piece of punctuation was surprising. And all the same, Ai's cheeks were red with embarrassment as her Mommy taped the diaper around her hips. When it was over, when the queen pulled Ai to her feet, the familiarity vanished, but the embarrassment did not. The thickness between her legs was nothing like the pull-up, and Ai worried she wouldn't even be able to walk. She tried to act like none of this was bothering her, but Ai looked up at Mommy with such shyness. "You'll get used to it, Ice and Claire, and you'll soon wonder how you were ever not a little girl. Now hold up your hand, like this." The queen held out her hand to demonstrate, and waited for Ai to do the same. Then she fetched the first of the two jingly mittens. Ai watched carefully as her Mommy put the mitten on. Two bells, one on each side. An elastic part around the wrist. Mommy slid the fabric over Ai's hand and pulled a strap around the elastic, which clicked shut with a press. Like a lock, but there was no place for a key. Then she did the same with the other hand. Ai tried to ball her hand into a fist, to warp her wrist a little to get as much leverage as she could, but the tall woman flattened her hand inside the mitten and tightened it all the same. Ai reached over with one mitten to pull the other off, but she couldn't get a good grip. The inside was lined with some kind of padding, and the bells jingled with each of Ai's movements. "Sleeping girls don't need their hands, so this shouldn't be any problem at all for you, should it?" the queen asked, but it was a rhetorical question. "Don't fret and fuss, Ice and Claire. Just like your diapers, you'll get used to them." The queen stripped Ai of her dress and pulled a nightie over her head. Without the use of her hands, with her thighs spread apart, and with the height difference between her and her caregiver, Ai realized exactly how helpless she was. Then the queen picked her up and set her on her hip like Ai didn't weigh anything at all. The front of her diaper pressed into her Mommy's side and all Ai's plans of rebellion began to dissolve like sugar in water. The queen carried her charge from the little girl's bedroom, down the hall, up three flights of stairs - each more grand than the one before it - and finally into the royal bedroom. The king was already waiting inside, and seemed to already know what was going on. "Well, I was wondering when you would arrive, my dears. Ice and Claire, you do look positively exhausted and ready for sleep. Doesn't she, dear?" "She does," Mommy agreed, as she walked to the large bed in the center of the room. But she didn't set Ai down on the bed. Instead, she took a seat and put Ai on her lap, on her padded bottom. Her mittens jingled as she tried to hold onto her Mommy's clothes. "Now, my darling," Mommy whispered in Ai's ear. "You truly want to be my little girl? Are you absolutely sure?" Ai looked up at her with burning red cheeks. She certainly did not want that! But then she caught sight of her backpack in the corner. It was wrapped around a chair, only a few feet from the bed... With a deep breath, Ai nodded her head. "Yes, Mommy..." "Then you'll need to go to bed with a full tummy, so you wake up with a full diaper. That's appropriate for a girl your age I would say." One hand held Ai in place, like she was simply stabilizing an infant in her lap, as the other did something Ai didn't expect: it unbuttoned the top clasps of her dress. It wasn't until Mommy's bare breast was pulled from her bodice that Ai realized what was happening. A panic welled up in her so quickly that she couldn't stop it. "No, no way!" Mommy gave her a look of curiosity and Daddy crossed his arms sternly. Ai quickly backpedaled. "I... I mean... that's... a bit too far, isn't it? That's..." That was something Ai had seen done only a few times in her entire life, always by women with newborns. Every time, it made Ai blush and she had to excuse herself from the room, though her response was always quite disproportionate to the situation. "If you're to be of royal blood, then you must drink royal milk," Daddy explained, keeping his composure. "This is a divine privilege, Ice and Claire. Not many people are offered this, and many would die for it. You should be more grateful." "R-right, but... I just..." "If you'd rather finish your spankings, you can go on your way," the queen said coldly, and ice ran through Ai's blood. "N-no..." Ai was stuck between a breast and a hard spank. She tried to think of a way out of it - of any way out of it! - but time was up. Mommy cradled Ai in her arms and put Ai's lips to her chest. With a tight pull on her hair, Ai opened her mouth and latched onto Mommy's nipple. The humiliation was unbearable, but it didn't last long. Warm, sweet milk dribbled into Ai's mouth and she felt fuzzy and warm all over. Mommy's heartbeat was deep in her ear, echoing through her brain. And suddenly, all of Ai's problems melted away. It was the first time since meeting Queen Errata that she and Ai connected on something. It was spiritual and intangible. It was magic. And Ai felt things she had never felt for her Mommy: patience, curiosity, empathy… In this new light, Ai wondered if maybe the queen was doing all this for some other reason than to torture her. That maybe Ai didn't find where she belonged in the King's Kingdom, but her Mommy found where she belonged in Ai Sinclair. That maybe, since Ai hadn't yet found her own happy ending, she could be someone else's instead. It could have lasted a single minute or an eternity. Eventually Ai was removed from the queen's breast, but the feelings didn't go away. Her eyes were glossy, and as her Mommy spoke to her, Ai agreed absentmindedly. "You're a good baby girl, aren't you?" Nod. "You are so happy to be in diapers, aren't you?" Nod. "You never want to grow up again, isn't that right?" Nod. "You'll live as my baby girl, and you'll feel like this forever. Doesn't that sound wonderful?" Nod. "Say it." "Wonderful... to be your baby... forever..." Ai's voice was slurred, unable to put in enough effort to form the words correctly. Why would she need words? She was just a little baby. Ai was tucked into bed, flanked by Mommy and Daddy. Her diaper was soft between her legs, and her head was sticky with thoughts of the rest of her life. A happy, blissful life with Mommy and Daddy. Maybe this was where she always belonged after all.

Chapter Two Suddenly, everything was different. The evening sky turned mid-afternoon. The snow vanished and the fluffy grass beneath poked up. The mountain wasn't so steep anymore, more like a hill, and all the mountains on the horizon were replaced with thick, autumn trees. But one thing stayed the same: Ai's momentum. The canvas sled skipped across the grass a few times before friction got the best of it, and Ai was thrown off. She landed on her hip and tumbled down the hill on her side, eventually sliding to a halt near the bottom. "Ow," Ai said to herself, struggling to sit up. She rubbed her shoulder, which broke some of her fall. Then she wiggled her fingers and toes, just to make sure everything was still working okay. Other than a few scratches and a lot of sore muscles, Ai was just fine. "Well, where am I now..." Ai said to herself, fumbling for her compass. It pointed back the way she had come, up the hill. She turned and looked at the forest in the opposite direction. Under the canopy, the grass was littered with fallen leaves, orange and yellow and brown. A gentle breeze would sometimes pick them up and scatter them around, like moving around paint on a canvas, trying to cover up every blade of grass. There was a crispness in the air that made Ai think about apples. She hadn't had an apple in a long time. Ai took her first step into the forest, because her compass told her not to and for no other reason. The forest was tranquil and lively at the same time, and Ai immediately took a liking to it. Unlike the last bubble she was in, this one had animals. Deer. Deer with antlers. Rabbits. Rabbits with antlers. She had never seen a rabbit with antlers before. She offered one an M&M, but it ran into the brush. With a shrug, Ai continued onward. As the day went on, the wind brought a gentle song to her ears. The leaves were swept around and set down once again, leaving a path of yellow and green grass. Without thinking too much about it, the path and the song led her to the edge of the wood. In front of her was a river of sparkling blue water, and on the other side, a large stone castle. Ai's admiration lasted only a second before it was swiftly interrupted by a rumble at her feet, and vines sprung up around her. They twisted themselves with impressive speed into a tight cage, trapping her inside. The melody on the air fell away, and was replaced with a woman's voice. "Trespasser!" it boomed, and a woman rose up out of the river in front of Ai. Her skin was blue and shimmery, almost translucent, and her clothes were barely clothes at all. They were made of water, with rushes of bubbles to cloud particular parts of her body. Another woman dropped down from the trees behind Ai. She had green skin, her clothes were made of leaves, and her hair was decorated in flowers. She also had antlers on her head, just like the animals in the wood. They both looked annoyed and curious at Ai Sinclair. "Who are you?" asked the woman who came from the trees, though it sounded more like she was demanding an answer than asking for one. "I'm Ai Sinclair," Ai said. "And I'm not trespassing. I'm walking through. "Walking through without permission is trespassing," said the woman in the water. Ai sighed to herself. She had been in bubbles like this before, with magical denizens. Ai used to have magic too, a long time ago, but she gave it up for other things. Exploration. Possibility. "Please, I'm just trying to get to the other side of your kingdom," Ai explained. "If you'd let me go—" "Let you go?" the woman in the water gasped. "You've broken the law. You have to be sentenced by the king!" "Yes, the king," the woman from the trees agreed, and suddenly the wooden cage began to shake. It tumbled forward into the river with Ai inside. "Hey! Watch it!" Ai shouted, trying to kick at the cage. But whatever magic the forest nymph used was strong. The water lurched and spun the cage, causing Ai to sink underwater, only to bob back up again for air. She clung the wooden bars of her cell for dear life as it drifted along with the river current. All the while, the two women laughed. It wasn't long before the cage arrived at a stone bridge. Water rose up underneath Ai and she fell roughly on the bridge, cage and all. She coughed up water and rolled onto her back, vines and sticks digging into her coat. "This is why I hate magic," she said more to herself than the two women. "It makes people so entitled." "Us? Entitled?" the woman in the water said. "You're the one trespassing!" the flower-dressed woman added, standing on the grassy bank. "Good point," Ai sighed, not wanting to fight with her captors. Maybe once she met this so-called king... "Oh, and what's this one?" The new voice was one of a young man in armor. He stood in the castle doors, looking down at the sopping wet girl. "Trespasser," both women said in unison. "Well, I'll take her to the king," the man said, staring curiously through the wooden bars. "Free her." Sure enough, the wood unraveled itself and left Ai in a puddle on the bridge. She struggled to get to her feet, completely waterlogged. But her freedom from captivity was short-lived, because the man in armor quickly forced her wrists into cuffs. Ai groaned. "You're new to the King's Kingdom, aren't you? Well, ignorance is no excuse when it comes to The King's Law." His tone was stern and serious. Then it softened. "Although The King is in a good mood today; this morning's harvest of honey was particularly to his liking. What is your name?" "Ai Sinclair," Ai said, without any deference in her voice. She'd been to enough "King's Kingdom"s in her travels to know the type. Arrogant, bossy men who liked to tell people what to do, thinking that what they wanted was always best. And often Ai was just another way to assert their dominance. "Well, Ice and Claire, that is an unusual name. But I'm not here to judge. I'm Rupert, and I'm Junior Squire to Lady Errata and a member of The King's Royal Guard. It's very nice to meet you, and I'm sure that once justice is dispensed you'll have a pleasant time here." Ai didn't believe in Rupert's prediction; lands like this one were always her least favorite, and she wasn't looking to stay long. But she knew to get what she wanted, she had to play the game. The castle was unsurprisingly empty. Though each world had a lot of space, they often only had a handful of people. There were exceptions, like the City in the Sky; Ai only stayed there for a day, but she guessed there were something like five hundred residents. Rupert led Ai through a large set of doors and into the throne room, where a tall man in fancy robes was sitting. Beside him, there were two chairs: one had a woman in it, who was nearly as tall as the man and dressed in equally-but-different fancy robes. The other chair was empty. "Your Majesty," Rupert said. "This is Ice and Claire. She was found trespassing in your wood." "Pardon me, Your Majesty," Ai said kindly, putting on a fake smile. "I am new to the kingdom, and I meant no disrespect." "Mm... and where were you going?" the king asked. His voice was oddly warm and deep, lulling even. Ai felt his words in her chest. "To another bubble," Ai answered honestly. Then, on the rare chance the king didn't know what she was talking about, she added: "A different land." "And what is wrong with my land?" the king asked. "Nothing, Your Majesty," Ai asserted. "But it isn't my home. I am trying to get home." "Mm... and have you a compass? You should have one, if you left home." "I do, Your Majesty. It's in my bag." The king snapped and Rupert unclipped Ai's backpack from her back. Ai let out a sigh of mild irritation, but she couldn't do anything but acquiesce. The king opened it up and sifted through, as if it was his own. "This bag is quite deep." The king sounded almost impressed. "It's enchanted, Your Majesty. A friend gave it to me, to help me on my journey." "Mm... yes, you have quite a lot of things in here." "For travel, Your Majesty." Ai was getting really tired of saying 'Your Majesty'. The woman on the king's side - perhaps Lady Errata - leaned in and whispered something to the king. The king nodded his head. "Well, you must be disciplined for trespassing," the king said, and that deep, velvety voice echoed in Ai's ears. "Um... yes, Your Majesty," Ai managed to say. As soon as she resolved whatever discipline he had in store, then she could leave. "I believe that twenty sets of ten ought to be sufficient; you're a first offender, after all." The king looked to the woman for her opinion, maybe her approval, which the woman gave with a small, understated nod. Ai didn't know what the king was talking about, but he said in a smooth voice: "Come here", and Ai did just that. With Rupert at her side, Ai approached the throne until she was an arm's length from the king. He reached out, took her by the handcuffed hand, and lifted her up onto his lap. At first, Ai was stunned. The man was at least a foot taller than her, but he picked her up without any effort at all. He didn't make any comment about how her wet clothes were soaking his robes. Then Ai was confused because the king was adjusting her over his knee, the way a child might adjust a doll. But when the grown man tugged down the seat of Ai's pants, flashing her wet underwear to the queen beside him, her confusion turned to deep embarrassment. A familiar sinking feeling filled Ai's stomach, but she didn't know why. "Hey! What are you doing?" "Administering justice, as is my duty as the king." The king acted swiftly, bringing his hand down in quick succession over Ai's wet behind. A wetness that certainly exacerbated the sting of his very large hands. "Now dear," the woman, Queen Errata smiled with faint amusement, "you must count, or they don't." "I... what... I'm..." The pain was nothing compared to the sheer shock. Ai's whole body tensed up in a panic, and her mind whirled with a thousand feelings she couldn't explain. Another spank on her bottom pulled her out of her shock, and another reminded her exactly how much it really hurt. And it really hurt! "One?" Ai asked, after the third hit. She should have started at three, but she didn't. Something in her head told her to start at one. "Good girl!" Queen Errata cooed. "And what comes next?" Another spanking came next. The pain radiated through Ai's bottom, up her spine, into her head. Her whole body was trembling. "T-two..." Ai tried to hold it together. Counting, ignoring the pain, ignoring the embarrassment. She'd never been spanked before - she didn't even know what spanking was! - but it filled her with such heavy feelings. "T-ten..." Ai finally stuttered, and the king stopped. Ai was quivering in his lap, the skin on her bottom red and angry. She was dizzy from the flood of emotions. "A little break then," the king said, gently rubbing Ai's bottom with his hand. "I... I'm sorry I... um... please... lemme up..." Ai begged the king, but his hand on her butt felt nice. Comforting. It made her heart warm. "Now now Miss Ice and Claire, there's no hurry. Your justice will be delivered swiftly and regally, as I, the king, see fit. Enjoy your reprieve, and no more squirming now, understand? There's a good subject." "I'm not a subject," Ai said sourly, kicking her feet and trying to get off the king's lap. There were limits to her willingness to follow the rules in someone else's land, and those limits had certainly been crossed. "I said no squirming," the king said sharply, and a heavy fog filled Ai's mind. She hesitated on her words and her body stilled. The king clearly had some kind of magic of his own, and Ai wasn't able to contend with it. "I think that's enough time," the king said, and loosed his palm onto Ai's bottom. She did her best to count, but the second set was so much worse than the first. Humiliation was waning away, and the sheer amount of pain in her body made her eyes fill with tears. By the time he got to ten, Ai was spent. She couldn't take another round. "Please... your majesty... I've learned my lesson, please..." "If you had learned your lesson, Miss Ice and Claire, you wouldn't be begging me to stop." "You'd be begging him to continue," Queen Errata offered smugly. Ai shook her head. She knew what kind of behavior the king wanted, and she had been determined to give it to him, but this was too much for her. Even as he rubbed the seat of her panties, Ai was so anxious about the next set that she couldn't stop crying. "One," Ai managed. Tears spilled down her cheeks. Each spank was so powerful, and she was in agony. Two, three, four. Five and six were slow and slurred. And after that, her wailing of numbers was indecipherable. Her brain had turned off entirely, and her base instincts kicked in: bawling like a little baby. "My king," the queen whispered, looking forlornly at the bawling woman in her husband's lap. "Perhaps let's wait for the rest." "Mm..." The king looked at Ai, then the eyes of his wife. He nodded. "What do you think of that, Ice and Claire?" the queen cooed. "We will postpone the rest of your discipline until you are ready. And until then, you'll be our honored guest." Ai quickly nodded her head. She was only catching every other word through the ringing in her ears, but Ai knew that the queen was offering to end the spankings. "But you must do what you are told," the queen said sternly. Her voice didn't have the same command as her husband's, but it was just as serious. "Any disobedience, and we will add more discipline. Do you understand?" Ai didn't hesitate. Her higher thoughts had shut down, and the concept of cause and effect was a wistful memory. Above all else, Ai needed the spankings to stop, and she would do anything to make that happen. "Yes, Your Majesty..." Ai fumbled, mispronouncing every syllable of those words. "Good girl," the queen said. "But from now on, you'll call me Mommy."

Hey there! There was a chapter in my life a few years back where I lived the ABDL dream. I had an ABDL daddy who treated me like a baby 24/7 for weeks on end. He took care of everything for me: changing diapers, feeding, bathing, dressing, massages, even outings. This was during my time as the marketing manager for an ABDL store, Littles Downunder. We used to host ABDL events complete with a ball pit and engaging games. The store had a room equipped with an adult-sized changing table, and I cherish the memories of my daddy changing me there. I was fully immersed in that baby lifestyle, but life took a turn. I prioritized my career and entrepreneurial endeavors, which led to relocating to another city. In this new phase, I found love with another daddy. He wasn't ABDL, but I still wore diapers 24/7 and enjoyed many babying moments with him. However, the dynamics were different from my previous relationship. Life, as it always does, changed yet again. Now, my baby moments are more private, confined mostly to my bedroom. Diapers remain a constant for me, though. After living that 24/7 baby dream, I feel content with my current life. There were instances with my full-time daddy when I felt detached from reality, so this balance now feels right. Still, a part of me yearns for extended baby time, and I dream of setting up a personal nursery someday. Warm regards, Starlight ⭐

What a great story I've just read this from start to finish I do hope we get to here more about jordon and Derek journey Thank you again for a great story

Thank you very much! I like formatting again. Also, I think I'm a day late by my self-imposed deadline. I think I really do need a Joyce for some structure. Please enjoy! CH37 - Wait and See “Emily, I’m--!” By now her routine was rehearsed and practiced, refined to become the perfect technique. Around the corner. One step out in the open. Pivot on the heel. Tighten the muscles, then pounce! Emily’s naked feet soared across the vast valley of slate, a forbidden place where no bare soles would dare to roam. It was sure suicide for Emily’s poor appendages. But she was bold. She was brave. Her gamble as always paid off, taking a leap of faith and being caught by her rescuer and guardian angel. Emily squealed with delight as Joyce’s firm hands slipped under her thighs and Emily’s legs caught around Joyce’s waist and between her arms like a plug into a socket. The joy on Emily’s face was always the same, yet the novelty never left. Wrapping her arms around Joyce’s neck she put on her best rosy smile. “Welcome home!” Emily giggled. “G-good to see you…!” Joyce grunted for a second, setting Emily back on the floor after a duly needed kiss. Thankfully Joyce found the time to keep her muscles in shape, somehow, but that didn’t mean she was always primed for a surprise attack like that. Give her a second to prepare and she could carry Emily to the depths of hell and back. Catch her on a bad second, and well, she might need a minute. “Did you do all your chores?” “Of course I did.” Emily nodded assuredly, pacing to and fro as Joyce took off her flats. As much as Joyce claimed to be “caught off guard” by these ‘welcome home’ antics, a niche sort of rule came from it that always made the crime premeditated. Thus, these sort of pounces were no surprise when Joyce might happen to hint at not wearing heels that day, for understandable reasons. With her back facing Emily, she couldn’t help but giggle thinking about the day that spawned that one. No sprained ankles, but a five-hundred dollar pair of heels went down the drain… Needless to say, Joyce had to do a lot of mommying that night to cheer Emily up. So much, in fact, that she made up the rule just to let her think she’d been punished and absolved of her sins. “What’s so funny?” Emily asked on her knees, gently rocking Joyce from her shoulders. “You~” Joyce smirked as her feet were freed from submission. “Speaking of who, were you a good girl today?” “Of cour-- Wait,” Emily frowned. “You didn’t ask me yet.” As a stickler to the rules as she was, even Emily could be prone to getting caught up in the moment. “Oops,” Joyce apologetically smiled, but held hope given Emily’s susceptibility to the momentum. “First, are you gonna be my good girl for the night?” Emily puffed her cheeks as she tried to make the moment look contemplative. “Of course I will...” Her cheeks reddened. “It’s a Friday, after all...” “Choose your words carefully. The F-word alone is enough to excite me!” Just as Emily was starting to stand, Joyce promptly pulled part of her back down by the waistband. Emily went up, but her pants did not. “E-Emily?” “...Yeah…?” “Where are your panties?” “...W-well...I sorta just...” Her face was starting to magnetize toward her shoulder. “I sorta figured since...” There was something in itself of Emily looking so embarrassed, so bashful, yet her knees barely bowed inward as she stood there. Had Joyce been robbed of her imagination, Emily’s dwindling sense of shame would continue to compensate as her crotch and nether regions hid behind nothing but the air itself. “So you took off your panties before I got home, expecting me to find you like this?” “I...I guess...” She sort of did. Creativity was something she unfortunately had a lot of time to stew with, but slightly less now with her daily tasks... “You guess?” Joyce took a stand on the wooden floor where she could comfortably look down on the half-naked girl again. “It’s a yes or no question, Emily.” “Y-yes...” Maybe it was a bit too much for her, starting to bend forward for her pants at the ankles. “Ah-ah!” Joyce caught her by the wrist and tugged her back up straight. “No, I took those off for a reason. But I don’t remember taking off your panties for you. What’s that all about?” “I...I dunno…” Emily unfortunately knew where this was going. “You don’t know?” Joyce laid it into her, just like any stern mother would. “You’re telling me that you took your panties off for no real reason?” “Yes...” “Yes?” Joyce repeated. “I think you do have a reason. I think you wanted me to catch you like this. Have you already forgotten that this is the second time now I’m coming home to find you naked?” “I was wearing clothes!” All of them except for the undergarments… “Yet not where it counts...” Joyce hung her head into her hand, looking as playfully disappointed as could be. “Emily, these are an awful lot of gymnastics just to tell me you like your diapers?” “Wha--?! N-no! I’m...” She blushed and groaned. Bloaned. Screw it, the roleplay was getting too embarrassing for her. “I did it because I thought you’d like it!” Her girlfriend’s eyebrows raised as surprise overtook her look. But her face was a canvas she could paint so beautifully well. Joyce, the emotional artist that she was, formed a crease as she pursed her lips and told a story with her eyes that hardly believed Emily’s “fib” for not even a second. “Uh-huh…?” She nodded patronizingly. Emily scrunched her face as she looked agitated now, knowing she’d never get Joyce to break the act now, not when Emily was making it far too entertaining for her. “Okay, diaper bum,” Joyce calmingly spoke as she clasped her hands, “let’s go get that bottom in something snug!” A bubbly hum escaped her as she took the first few steps. “No, leave the pants, sweetheart,” Joyce calmly instructed her. Once again, Emily with a furnace of steamy, cushy emotions awkwardly stepped out of the yoga pants fully. “Was work good?” Emily tried to remain of an adult mind as she shuffled awkwardly by the door to the nursery. “It was fine,” Joyce said with a smile while she slipped the key into the knob, “but I’m glad to be home. Frankly, I get a little worried knowing that my little girl could be running around the apartment naked from the waist down...” “I was wearing pants! I only took them off like fifteen minutes ago!” “Well, as much as I’d like to help you prove that,” Joyce put on an exaggerated shrug, “the video cameras weren’t recording audio today, so we’ll never see when it happened...” “W-gh...That’s…!” Emily tried to argue, but was so swept up only did she realize now. “Wait, you said audio? That still means you can see--!” Joyce’s hand gave her stress ball a fun squeeze. “Your cute little bum!” She joyfully interrupted by cupping Emily’s naked butt. “S-stop!” Emily whined with a tinge of glee, shooting forward into the nursery. “Your hands are cold!” She laughed as she tried to transfer some heat back into her backside. “And if only you’d have been wearing something to keep you warm...” Joyce tutted. This was always her favorite part; letting their witty banter simply roll off the tongue. Speak reactively. Naturally. Because it was natural, because this was all so real and so casual for them. The first order of business on the way in for Emily was a squeeze on Mr.Bear’s large stuffed nose. Their typical greeting to one another on occasions such as this. It was like having a greeter at a superstore to welcome all the incoming shoppers, except it was the other way around. Mr.Bear was a...greeter receiver? Weird job, but if it paid the bills… And even in a land of diapers, nurseries and pacifiers, the human condition by the way of habit and routine is no less out of place than it’d be anywhere else. Up on the changing table Emily went, and just like the unfortunate routine would go, then the strap came over her. “Do you really need to use the strap?” Emily frowned a small bit, her one complaint becoming the small spice to this “routine” that’d happen to change up the repetition every once and a bit. “It’s to keep you on the changing table?” Joyce feigned ignorance, something she lended herself to so well when it came to teasing and flustering Emily. “It’s not like I’m going to fall off!” Emily threw her hands in the air. Correction. She imagined herself doing so. Strap and whatnot. “Right,” Joyce nodded. So they did agree? “Because you have this strap on.” Maybe not. Emily pouted, but she cooperated. Next came the gentle tap on her thigh as a signal to do her best to lift her hips. “So...” Emily waited to let the crinkling of an unfurling diaper finish, “So did anything at all interesting happen today?” Joyce’s eyes wandered to the ceiling as her spatial awareness seemed to carry on with the diapering like it was breathing. “Mm...I did talk with Sheila a little bit today.” The S-word had become a bit of a squeamish spot for Emily. She trusted Joyce, naturally, but Sheila outside her tangible realm was fantasized more as a ticking time-bomb than a loyal assistant of her girlfriend. “Yeah? About what?” The sweet scent of lavender was starting to cloud on her crotch, as was tradition. Maybe it was good she was under the strap, otherwise she’d be wiggling all over from the tingly feeling… “Uhm...business?” Joyce didn’t sound so sure herself, despite it feeling like such a significant part of her day, now that she thought about it. “A little bit about her. Tiny bit of me.” “That is your highlight?” Emily warped her lips and cocked her head and brow. “Don’t you two talk all the time?” After all, a secretary with no communication probably meant problems somewhere in the chain of logistics… The eyelids on her partner dropped a bit as she looked off to the side. “We don’t really have many personal discussions...” “N-no,” Emily suddenly blurted out. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude.” She gave an earnest look of remorse, despite having baby powder being rubbed into her privates by the one she was apologizing to. “I assumed when I shouldn’t’ve.” “Thank you,” Joyce gave her a kiss on the forehead. “I know it sounds a little weird, but Sheila and I have a pretty limited relationship… Don’t get me wrong; we’re friendly, but we’re boss and secretary above all else. It’s sort of hard to forget that whenever we talk...” For multiple reasons, but most of all Sheila keeping to a gold standard herself. “So she was willing to talk today about stuff?” Emily bounced back. “She’s always willing, just only as an employee, which is good, but also…” she sighed. “But today wasn’t like that for at least a second. She actually started saying something first today, which isn’t like her.” “Well that’s good.” Emily nodded supportively, although she felt ill-equipped to really understand their relationship and the actual significance of these events. Therefore, she would engage in the only way she knew how. “So? Tryna be better friends with Sheila? Are you trying to kick me out and get a new baby girl?” She grinned. Joyce giggled as she pressed the tapes on Emily’s diaper. “I think it’d cause me some problems if my reports were written in crayon. Besides, your diapers definitely would not fit her.” “My diapers?” Emily repeated Joyce’s choice words. “Yes, your diapers,” Joyce emphasized with a smile. “I like where I have both of my girls as is.” “So putting me in diapers is a duty as a boss, too?” Emily laughed. “Of course it is,” Joyce stated as a fact. “I’m the boss of you too, you know?” Joyce undid the strap as she gingerly patted Emily’s crinkly crotch. “This is the fifth complaint I’ve gotten from HR about you running around half-naked! I can only let you off with so many warnings, young lady?” “Uh-huh. Well I’m gonna report you to HR for harassment.” Emily stuck out her tongue as she set up and rolled off her hip onto her feet. “Harassment?” Joyce’s mouth hung agape. “Emmy, sweetie,” she hooked her finger on the diaper’s waistband. “It’s job security!” She paused with a growing smirk, as if awaiting the praise from her masterful wordplay. “Ugh...” Emily groaned with a simultaneous smirk as she turned away just to hide the giggly look. And just to double down before Joyce’s teasing could reach her ears, Emily leapt forward to the corner where her trusty confidant remained as always. As Emily nuzzled herself into the giant bear, Joyce drifted to the other end of the nursery as she fussed through the closet. “I really wish we could just leave your high chair out in the kitchen always...” Joyce passively complained as she contemplated on the few pieces of clothing she had for her baby girl. A crime, unfortunately, one she hoped to rectify soon with more discussions with Amy. Emily’s ears were enveloped in stuffed bear-ness as her mind was still on the track of dodging humiliation, chanting in muffled cries as she ‘blah-blah’ and ‘la-la’ed her way out of conviction. “Out of the bear, missy,” Joyce beckoned, holding Emily’s onesie over her arm. “We have your underwear situation solved, but not your uniform.” “Uniform?” Emily spun her head. Maybe she could hear it all… Joyce held it out in front of her. She’d been sparing with the outfits thus far, just to maximize their novelty. Emily laid eyes on the pink and white stripes for the first time, small pouch pockets and a hanging crotch flap. “Did Amy make that too?” Emily asked with a difficult expression. Impressed, yes, but bashful for being the one about to wear it? Most certainly so. “Yes she did!” Joyce sang as Emily stood up to be stripped of her last pieces of adult clothing. Up and down her arms went as Joyce slipped Emily’s head through the opening. Straightening it out and feeding her arms through the proper holes, one just might have thought her to be an eccentric featuring some kind of dress. Though, with each audible snap as Joyce lovingly fussed with the crotch of Emily’s onesie, her credibility as a fashionista was plummeting rapidly. “It’s soft.” Emily remarked as she ran her hands over her clothed stomach. Just when she went to feel the leg cuffs, Joyce gently moved her hands out of the way. “And just when was it your job to make sure your clothes fit you?” Joyce looked up at her with a playfully stern look. Emily opened her mouth for a witty reply, but then remembered she didn’t actually have one. Not only that, but how funnily bizarre Joyce’s comment was had knocked the linguistic part of her brain off its center. “I...” Emily looked partly over her shoulder just to stifle a random giggle. “...I just wanted to see how it felt.” “Well,” Joyce stood back up, running her hands over Emily’s shoulders before giving the sleeves a gentle tug. “Good thing these have snaps on them. If it slips right off then I doubt it’ll be on you for more than five minutes.” Emily rolled her eyes. “Are we still going with that?” “No, of course not, silly,” Joyce chuckled as she steered her to the exit. “You wouldn’t be in your diapers right now, if we were?” Emily almost made an audible noise of grief for having walked into that so easily. Then again, not so easily, as Joyce seemed to twist her words so masterfully, that Emily could talk about the weather and it’d somehow read to Joyce as asking for a nap in her crib. Either it was all baseless and on a whim, or there existed some kind of mommy logic Emily could never hope to understand. The realist inside of her claimed it was the former, but she stopped being a realist the moment she “lost” her panties. The order in train carts swapped once Joyce took the lead back to the bedroom, ever so happily leaving the nursery unlocked and opened. “Can we get shakes tonight?” Emily crinkled in tow with her innocent question. “You’re being very silly if you think that you’re getting dessert before dinner...” Joyce tutted whilst she unbuttoned her office attire. Emily had laid herself across the bed, watching Joyce half-naked walk around the room. “After dinner?” Emily emphasized her correction, maybe hoping that somehow earned her brownie points. “We’ll see,” Joyce gave her non-answer, rehearsed to a ‘T’ just so she could experience the thrill of getting to say it at any point. The joys of being a mommy, getting to experience all sorts of fun little bucket list items, like feeding her imaginary two-year old vague and empty placating responses. Emily rolled her eyes, technically, as her entire body as well rolled across the bed. “Can we do takeout for dinner, too?” Now Joyce was looking her way. “Takeout, too? What makes you think you’ve earned all those treats, missy?” “...Cuz it’s Friday?” “Friday is only good for one reward,” Joyce sufficed on the spot, somehow finding praise in her infantilized girlfriend surviving a week. But aside from that she also wanted to throw Emily a bone. “But...you also have been good with your chores,” Joyce smiled earnestly, “so I guess that should count for something, too?” Emily grinned back, but in the back of her mind it was only the pessimistic thought of how it could get her anything but an actual job… “So that’s a yes?” Emily giggled as she propped herself up with her elbows. “It’s a wait and see.” Joyce calmly repeated, just about done dressing herself. “Wait and see for what?” Emily frowned. “Wait and see if there’s a tantrum or naughtiness that might undo those two treats?” Joyce peaked over her shoulder with a glimmer and a smirk, as if tempting Emily to say something back. Emily furrowed her brows, nearly about to waltz right into what was surely entrapment, but her last-minute conscience saved her from such. “...Kay.” Joyce nearly pouted, clearly expecting a different outcome, yet she shrugged it off. “In that case, go park that bum by the door. Mommy’s gotta grab a few things before we go back out.” Emily hopped off the bed, doing as she was told, even before the playful swat on her behind sent her forward and onward. As she rocked the heels of her feet on the step just above the slate flooring, Joyce soon came next, stepping down in front of Emily. Just as Emily started to look up, her eyes brought her gaze back down as a long roll of multi-colored cotton unfurled itself from Joyce’s outstretched hand. “When did we get those?” Emily asked, a little caught off guard by the sudden addition to her wardrobe. “I saw these last week. Aren’t they pretty?” Joyce smiled from ear to ear and she kneeled in front of Emily, setting the girl’s foot on her thigh. “Uhm...they’re cute socks, but...” Emily watched Joyce bunch together the cotton thigh-high socks as she slipped it over Emily’s foot and fed the mile-long sock up her leg. “But nothing,” Joyce curbed the “attitude”, as she liked to call it. “It’s only getting colder outside, and even if you’re staying in the car I don’t want you feeling chilly.” “I wouldn’t be though?” Emily tried, although a onesie with a thick diaper was far more compromising than anything Joyce could put on her feet. “You’re right, you won’t be with these comfy socks?” Joyce gently tapped her knee, signaling Emily’s other foot. Emily continued to look pensive and reluctant, but practice had made her diligent in separating her hesitation from her actions. She could complain, moan and groan until the cows came home, but it wouldn’t change her compliance in a diaper change, outfitting, sippy cup and the like. Most of the time, at least. “Wait, why do I have to wear these socks if I’m just gonna wear pants?” Emily continued to poke holes in the plan as it was presented to her, now stepping into sweatpants. “Because these are just until we get to the car,” Joyce calmly explained, but promptly stopped with her hands on the waistband of her pants. “But if you really don’t want to wear them on the walk down, I think a onesie and jacket are fine too?” She already started to pull them down, albeit much slower. “No! They’re fine!” Emily whined right up until Joyce reversed her motions, chuckling no less. “I’ll just keep them on for the ride...” “No, it’s only to give you a little privacy while we’re walking. These come off once we get in the car.” Joyce said back without a laugh, as loving as she was. Emily pursed her lips, knowing that the decision had been made and it was final. Lowering her chin, she tossed her gaze over her shoulder. “I hate that you’re getting so good at that...” Emily pouted with an inflated cheek. “Getting good at what?” Joyce asked with an almost sultry look. She stood back up to pull a turquoise jacket off its hook. “...Mommying...” Emily quietly answered as she stood. Since the hotel incident and even a little before that, their consistent time spent in these sort of roles had led to much more acclimation for them both. Particularly Joyce. She was kind, loving, and as doting as ever. However, she seemed to be touching more on something that simply felt...motherly. Her sense of finality or authority was only growing with each and every moment for it. Drinking her milk. No more juice for the night. No ice cream after dinner. Staying in the bathroom after a bath until she was fully dried off. Using her pacifier... The many little things Joyce maybe once could have been bent out of simply because limits were still being explored. But finally, some of that novelty and newness was starting to wear off, meaning Joyce was starting to find a comfortable level of pressure and Emily was starting to lose her pull… For all perplexingly nice reasons, that is. Every day was another tiny shackle or ringlet to the padded leash Emily was finding herself in, and it only continued to illuminate the many unknown parts of herself she was starting to become strangely infatuated with. While at any point it’d all come back to her immediately, resigning her freedoms and decisions to Joyce really was...exciting. The diapers were certainly not her favorite, but even those were starting to lose their strangeness. Unfortunately...even the wet ones. “How’s the jacket? Soft?”Joyce was bent forward as she even took the liberty of zipping her jacket up as well. “Think so.” Emily answered nonchalantly while she continued to be handled. As for “softness”, it was hard to tell when her onesie was already smothering her with its own cushy feeling. “Good. Now on your bum; let’s get your sneakies on.” “Sneakies?” That look. Of course. The kind that could warble Emily’s mouth into an embarrassed grin that’d betray whatever sense of maturity she was trying to put on. Joyce’s look. Her typical look whenever she seemed to “rewrite reality” in a way that suited her needs. With a slight raise of her eyebrow and a tilt in her head, she asked in such an intoxicatingly wonderfully condescending way, “Honey...sneakies? The things we put on our feetsies?” Emily without a word, lest she start laughing, sat on the edge of the floor with a small crinkle, sitting her heels on the edge just so her knees were high enough to drape her arms over, making the perfect shroud for her flustered look. “I can’t put them on if you sit like that, silly.” Joyce without skipping a beat grabbed Emily’s feet and slid them off their perch with near-frictionless effort. Curse those socks. So went Emily’s modesty shroud as she stifled whatever laughter she was feeling from just a second ago. “Something wrong?” Joyce asked, knowing full well what all the commotion in her girl’s head was. “N-...nothing...” Emily tried to calm herself while she feigned fascination with the plain wall. “Nothing? Emmy, do you think you’re going to be able to handle me taking you out?” Now she had Emily’s attention. “Yes! Why wouldn’t I?” Emily knew it had to be Joyce getting a rise out of her, but she all the same couldn’t let it go unchallenged, otherwise she’d definitely double down… “Well...” All it took was a slight drag in her voice to insinuate the plethora of offenses poor Emily had supposedly committed. “Did I not just get finished putting you in a diaper for running around the house all day naked?” “It wasn’t all day--!” Emily tried to stop the assumptions before they could fester, but killing the fun was tantamount to sin for the woman in charge. “--And all this back-talk about what you’re wearing, what you want for dinner, making demands about dessert...” She made a troubled, exasperated sigh. “Emmy, sweetheart, if you don’t think you can handle going out, I’m more than fine with making us something here.” “No! I’m fine! I can han--” Emily put a stop to herself before she could finish her words. With a scowl she went back to looking by her side. So much for trying to sound like an adult… As if the canvas was fresh once more, Emily looked back at Joyce, the amused mommy, trying to come off as dignified. As dignified as one could be in rainbow socks, a onesie and diaper. “I am more than fine with going out...” Emily tried choosing the best ‘adult’ form of expression as she could. Hopefully it made the mark. “Mmm...well, alright then.” Joyce smiled softly, like poor Emily needed the encouragement to somehow find it in herself to be on her best behavior. “Can we go now?” Emily asked as she held Joyce’s hands like ropes to pull her upright. “Yes, yes,” Joyce ushered as she opened up the door. Though standing in the doorframe she did flash her open hand to Emily. “Hold Mommy’s hand?” While a flustered look was given back, Emily without a fuss did take her hand. With all the layering between her legs, having a tiny bit of insurance did feel inspiring. “Why do I always have to wear pastels?” Emily asked as she swung her sneakered foot while waiting for Joyce to lock the door. “Because it’s what you look so adorable in~” Joyce said back with the slip of her key into her purse. “Would you rather just your diapers?” She smiled thoughtfully. “Never...” Emily practically shuddered. Apart from the soft blow of heating vents inside the car, things were mostly silent. Crinkle Mostly silent. One thigh did their best to brush with the other, vice versa, yet their attempts for companionship were continually hindered by the padding that laid between. Finally, Joyce set her phone down. “Emily, you should really stop thinking about it and just try to go...” “Go…? Go what? I’m fine...” Now she was raising her eyebrow. Emily knew how lying to Joyce could be an exercise in futility, which is why Joyce thought it was absurd to be catching any even now. “Sweetie, you’ve been doing the potty dance in your seat for the past five minutes now...” Emily gasped the slightest bit. “I-Ihm...I’m not doing any dance! I’m just...sitting!” Joyce rolled her eyes. “It’s going to be at least another ten minutes until the food is ready, then we still have to go get milkshakes...” “I don’t mind...I’m fine...” Said Emily, not her bladder, who wavered even more at the mere mention of a prolonged wait. “What’s wrong?” Joyce was starting to find the sympathy in herself once a little coaxing couldn’t seem to do the trick. “Is it because we’re away from the house, is that it?” “No...I don’t need to...I can hold it...” Sort of an admission to guilt, but instead an admission to needing to pee. “I don’t want you holding it in,” Joyce softly reprimanded her. “It’s what you’re diapered for? Whatever you need to get out of your system is something you don’t need to worry about once it’s done, remember?” “It’s the car...” “The car?” “What if...what if it…leaks?” Joyce stared at her for a minute, then undid her seatbelt as she leaned over across the console and Emily’s lap. All it took was Joyce’s finger to brush its way against Emily’s inner thigh and inside her diaper for her to jump with a yelp. “What are you doing?! I’m not wet!” “That’s what I was thinking,” Joyce said without offense. “If your diaper is still dry as a bone, honey, why are you so worried about leaking?” Oddly enough, trust seemed to be involved not only between themselves, but Emily and her diapers. “I...I dunno...just in case...” “That’s my job to worry about.” Joyce readily said. “No need to worry about stuff like that, remember?” “...Yeah, but...” “But nothing. Emily, I want you to use your diaper. Right now.” “Right now? But…!” “I know that I can’t just tell you to forget about whatever might be worrying you, but I’m going to be stern if it’s what helps you. When we go back home you’ll be walking back up in just your onesie.” “Wh-what? Why?!” Emily whined back. That sounded and felt like a genuine threat. She would have gone for the sweatpants immediately to protect them, yet Joyce had confiscated them long since they first got into the car. “Because, if you’re going to assume that you might leak, we might as well keep your pants and socks from getting wet, right?” “That’s not what I mean!” “Whatever you mean, Emmy, I don’t want you to be thinking about it. I want you to focus on all the fun we’re gonna have tonight. The tasty dinner we’re about to get, the yummy milkshakes we’re going to have right after, and all the snuggles waiting for us at the very end. At no point do I want you worrying about what goes on in your diaper. Whatever happens is my responsibility, even if you do leak. Do I make myself clear?” “...But...” “Emily Sen. Do I or do I not?” She was certainly turning up the heat, and judging by Emily’s cheeks, she was certainly feeling it. “Y-yes...Mommy…” “Come on, sweetheart, sit in my lap.” A small, meek gasp came from Emily. Her worries were entirely about something happening to the seat of the car, but now Joyce as well? “Emily, baby...” She coaxed with her voice, invading Emily’s mind with a tone of voice that killed her resistance with overwhelming love and kindness. Sniffling, Emily did crawl over, situating herself on Joyce’s thighs in the driver’s seat. Thank the lord for tinted windows. “It’s only going to be a big deal if you treat it like one...” Joyce stroked her back with a calming rhythm. “Can I do it in my seat…? I get it...I’ll do it, but...” Emily trembled as she tried to squeeze her legs. It was another one of those moments. A fish as far as could be from an ocean. A fish in the desert without an oasis, as much as she wanted Joyce to be that for her. “After I just got my love-bug all cozy in my lap?” Joyce tried to stay lighthearted, steering away from what she’d consider teasing. “Do you want some help?” And by answering her question with a change of topic, Emily figured that to be a hard ‘no’ dressed in sheep’s skin. It was an uncomfortable few moments for Emily as she did her best not to squirm and mentally tensed her bladder with a half-waning resolve. And as her eyes started to water, through a series of soft grunts and reflexively pressing her hands off Joyce’s legs, a trickling warmth started to spread inside her underwear. Partially covered by her onesie, yes, but Joyce had already grown accustomed to the temperature right above her thighs, which is why she could feel the slight increase as Emily’s sniffles started to pick up. “All done?” “Uh-huh…” “I’m so proud of you, you know? Being able to let yourself go like that?” “I can’t though...it’s so hard...and it’s embarrassing…!” Again, at home was one thing. Elsewhere was different entirely. “But you just did? And embarrassment is a very big feeling... You’re too small for big feelings like that, so you shouldn’t be feeling anything like that at all.” “Mhm...” Emily nodded as she rubbed her eyes, not entirely sure if she could take those words as gospel just yet. “Hey, remember when we first went to Amy’s? We were running errands that day?” “Yeah…?” “And you were diapered then, too?” “...Yeah...” If any details might have offered some clarity to the distant memory, Emily would have preferred something a bit more generic. Then again, with their frequency as of late, diapers in their household really were starting to pick up a sense of generecy. Joyce rested her cheek on Emily’s back, smiling fondly. “I remember you went upstairs to Amy’s apartment while we talked about all the clothes I wanted to get you. After, we came up and I found you in the bathroom, covered in tears and you looked so sad...” On the other side of the fence, the victim herself wasn’t seeing it so fondly. “And look at me now...” Emily bitterly spoke. “I haven’t changed at all...” “Really?” Joyce smiled even wider. “I wouldn’t say that at all. A time like that already feels like a lifetime ago, and how far you’ve come with me in this relationship shows that. You have changed, Emily. So, so much. Before, something like this could knock you on your feet and leave you winded for the rest of the day. There’s nothing wrong with that, but think about how things are now? A wet diaper might make you feel uncomfortable, sure,” she stroked Emily’s arm, “but isn’t that about it? Those tears are already drying up, aren’t they?” Milestones were always weird with Joyce. Weird because they were so...weird. Normally a milestone would be a one-month anniversary or buying a house together, spending a holiday together. But their version was always unusual and unorthodox, especially when it was reverse toilet training. She should be cheering for re-training her muscles to relax and pee herself? Certainly in no world of Emily’s did that add up, which is why it could only make sense in a world like Joyce’s, of which she’d been living in for quite some time. “Can...can you change me?” Emily put her thoughts to words before her filter could even find them. Joyce was quiet for a second, leading the poor girl to think she’d done a taboo. It went against their motto Emily was trying to follow; kick back, relax, and go with the flow. Calling the shots wasn’t exactly “going” with anything except for your own decisions. “...No.” Joyce finally spoke, squeezing Emily with another hug. “I love you so much, sweetheart, but Mommy knows that diaper can go for longer...” This was even a step for herself. It was somewhat agreed to let things lie, and Emily herself agreed to staying in her used diapers for more than just a single use, but in fairness, doing it in a new place was likely adding to her nerves. “...Okay...” Emily knew better than to expect anything else by this point, but being told ‘no’ by Joyce was oddly something new to her. “Would I change you if we were back home right now?” “...No.” An obvious answer, with an obvious connection. “So what makes here any different?” Joyce asked. The moral she was trying to teach was obvious, on the level a child would understand, but that didn’t involve any of the harsh rhetoric an adult might get for missing something like this. She was calm, patient and caring. “It’s not...” Emily skipped two steps ahead to the inevitable answer. Whether she could say that it was different or not, whatever was in her heart didn’t really matter if the one responsible for diaper changes felt otherwise. There would eventually be some kind of vantagepoint to look back on this objectively and agree with Joyce, but that didn’t do a damn thing for how boxed in Emily was feeling right then. No real anger towards Joyce, just the unfairness of the situation. She helped Emily off her lap and back into her seat, but not without charging her a kiss. “Just remember that it’s one of the many ways you always show how much you love me?” Joyce held her head there until Emily was ridden with a case of the smiles. “I’m gonna go see if the food is ready,” Joyce opened the car door, baring against the chipper winds of the city night. “Keep the car warm for me!” “Ka--...y...” Emily waved her off, but was hit with a double meaning. Did she mean to keep the heat running? Or… She dashed the thought, and instead resigned herself to a grumpy face while she tried to ignore the warm pad between her legs. With about half of her milkshake to go, Joyce set it back down on the coaster. “Hey...” Joyce turned her head and voiced a gentle warning. “Both hands, remember?” “I know...” Emily with half her attention to Joyce responded. “You should be using both hands too, you know...” Obviously it didn’t click. “Why’s that?” Joyce smiled. “Cuz it’s...so you don’t spill any.” Wasn’t that obvious? After all, she expected the same of Emily. It was good etiquette all around, really. “Well, since I’m the last of us to not spill anything on the furniture, I’m still allowed to use just a single hand.” Power dynamics could not be any more fun. The “privileges” afforded to the few and the rules given to the charges. All the subtle and little things always made it that much more intimate. “It was just water...” Emily moaned back between sucks from her straw. “Was it now?” Joyce didn’t disagree, but she tried not to laugh regardless. How funny it was that time could change her tune so easily on a past memory. The night she spilled water on the couch she was sobbing and beating herself all over. A bit silly to think how light she was making it now, but that was only a good thing. “Yes.” Emily added with childish emphasis. “And I was using both hands that time, too! So it shouldn’t matter if I use both or not!” “...Well, actually, I guess that’s a good point.” Joyce admitted. She did remember both hands on the glass… “See? So I should be able to use one hand, too.” And just to demonstrate… “No,” Joyce shot the fantasy down immediately. Emily’s plastic cup went back down before the rocketship could make it to mars. “That rule doesn’t change. But you still made a very good point!” How good of a point could it be if nothing changed? Emily could only wonder, but she figured a wrong choice of words might get Joyce thinking more than she should. She was scary when she was thinking… “Really, by your logic, it’d probably be safer to swap you to sippy cups and bottles full time then, huh?” “Wh-what? No! I didn’t say that!” “But you said it yourself, didn’t you? Using both hands on a big girl cup wasn’t enough to stop you from spilling it?” “I didn’t say it wasn’t enough, I just said that it wasn’t related!” Emily stressed to point out the difference, too preoccupied to realize that it didn’t really change the point Joyce was making for sheer entertainment. “So if it wasn’t related, then nothing really caused you to spill it?” “That’s...hnnn…” She was starting to make her annoyed kind of thinking noise. “No...yes! Nothing caused it!” Joyce nodded understandingly. “Then...we should definitely keep you on sippy cups then.” “What?! No! Why?” And back to a whining voice as circular logic dictated. “Emily, if nothing caused it and using both hands won’t solve it either, we really can’t stop you from spilling your drinks unless we give you a little more help?” Gosh, it was so hard not to smirk during these kinds of gaslighting sessions. “I already have to use sippy cups!” “Maybe, but...” “...?” Emily turned her head, wondering ‘what gives’. Did she forget her lines or something? The audience was watching… Joyce frowned. “Nevermind. You actually do use your bottles and sippy cups, mostly...” A chance! “Y-yeah!” Emily ever so tactfully spoke up. “Which is why that doesn’t help either. So let’s stop talking about it!” “But that doesn’t include when you’re pretending to be a big girl,” the mama in charge curtly reminded. Probably the biggest flaw whenever Emily tried this sort of thing was the crucial fact that punishments weren’t meant to be collaborative between the punisher and punished… “Come over here,” Joyce beckoned with a hand, and Emily was more than excited to oblige. One to know how to read the mood, Emily’s eyes were already closing as she came in for a kiss. Lips locked and love was exchanged, but what put a real damper on things was when she sat on Joyce’s hand. Her diaper sat on Joyce’s hand, specifically. Both their eyes opened, only one seemed much more giddy than the other. “Thought so,” Joyce’s teeth were peeking between her lips. “Wanna do it here or in your nursery?” “To get...get intimate, you mean?” Emily nervously tried to play it off. So much for a bait and switch… It already felt like she’d wasted a few drops of adrenaline just to psych herself up. “If that’s what a diaper change is to you, then sure?” Her smile grew more like the dreaded disappointment on Emily’s face. “How...how did you know…?” Emily pouted with a turned cheek. “Emily, it’s my job to get a read of the room whenever I’m meeting with other executives,” it really was cute, she laughed, but did kiss her again. “I think I know how to spot a potty face when I see one.” “I don’t have one!” She vehemently denied, but apparently the writing was on the wall as much as the supposed distant expression was on her face whenever it...happened. “Of course you don’t, my little nightie ninja.” She almost pat herself on the back for that one. “Now which is it? Living room or the nursery?” “...Is it a trick question?” Joyce always seemed to fabricate tricks and traps in the strangest of places. “No, but I could think of a way for it to be?” In other words, decide before Joyce did and then some. “Living room.” Emily finally caved, needing so few threats from Joyce to get the memo. At least with the tv on she had some distraction. “Alrighty. Let me go get your changing stuff.” “Stuff that you bought?” Emily with well-placed insecurities reminded her. Just as smoothly though, “Bought you for your birthday?” Well damn. The next step was to deny that she had birthdays, but then that could somehow be used to justify her as a baby completely, and whatnot… Emily could never say for sure if she really understood the “Joyce Summers” thought process, but at least she figured it was close to that. Joyce came back in with an armful of things to perform the ritual. After laying out the mat, Emily astutely noticed the short T-shirt laying by her side. If Emily was already in a onesie, then that could only mean… “I’m not going to bed yet!” Emily complained, something she was learning to get better at. “It’s just for if you were starting to feel stuffy?” Joyce tried to play it down. “Do you prefer your onesie? I’ll have to tell Amy that!” “Noo! I know how this works. You’re just putting pajamas on me!” “...And if I was?” She had the audacity to ask, dressed in all her day-clothes and looking so...mature. “If I’m wearing pajamas, you have to, too!” It was the law of the land. By Emily’s decree. “After your diaper change,” she patted the mat. “I know you weren’t just a good girl to get those treats out of me?” No, she wasn’t… Emily came over to lay down, always unnerved by the squish from her underpants. “Did you have a fun night?” Joyce chatted with her charge while the diaper change ensued. “It’s not over yet...” Emily groaned, always peeved to hear talk about a time being over before it really was. Her eyes may have been bigger than her stomach, envisioned the most but awake the shortest to see the least, but she still liked to be prospective. “But yes.” “Good.” Joyce’s favorite button of Emily’s was the one right on her nose. “And no, I did not say it was over yet. We can watch a movie, if you’d like?” She nodded. “Okay. How about a scary movie?” Had there been any sort of jazz music playing, what taboo was just spoken from Emily’s mouth surely would have stopped the tunes. So in place of that Joyce just stopped short of fully peeling off a diaper tape. “Why do you ask for things that you know I’m going to say ‘no’ to?” Joyce sighed. While she figured herself a stern mommy and a firm girlfriend, by all accounts she figured herself generous. There was more she probably said ‘yes’ to than otherwise, so why was it Emily’s mission to find all the things she didn’t approve of? “Come on…!” Emily, the ignorant and forgetful of memory’s past (not really, but vulnerable to being blinded by a good mood), begged from the floor in the midst of a diaper change. “You let me have stuff tonight. I wanna let you!” “You already have?” The smell of lavender started clouding from her girlfriend’s nether regions. “Emmy, you’ve already had one accident because of the last scary movie...” “Forgetful” as she was, Emily found it hard not to blush from that. “I...know, but...this time I’m wearing a...you know.” Pulling the front of the you-know-what up to Emily’s abdomen sort of made for an answer. “And is that going to solve the nightmares, too?” Joyce didn’t sound any more convinced. “And you’re my dreamcatcher?” Emily added with a glimmer in her eye. Joyce almost flinched and turned away, overwhelmed by such shiny cuteness. Everyone in the right moments had their way with words, and apparently that was Emily’s. “...I’m fine with any other kind of movie, you know?” Hook and sinker. Another “maybe” to a yes or no kind of question that surely meant yes. There wasn’t a refusal, and no refusal clearly meant that there was consent (As far as bad morals went). “Hope you pick something you’re really gonna like!” Emily giggled. Gosh, who would have thought she could use diapers to her advantage? And truthfully, at least this way there wouldn’t have to be any late night bathroom mishaps… Joyce still gave her the kind of look to say that it still wasn’t all so cut and dry, and dry is what Emily would not be by the end of the night. Not that it really mattered. After tugging off her onesie and putting the short shirt on, Emily was just a half-naked woman in a shirt and diaper with a fair amount of skin spaced between. “Okay, you’re all changed. Let me clean up and get changed too.” Emily parked her butt on the couch, lazily browsing her phone. When Joyce came back, she looked much more dressed to code, wearing flannel pajamas and a small bundle of something in her arms. “What’s that?” Emily looked from her phone. “Insurance.” Joyce threw something at her face. A soft collision, thankfully, but actually a kamikaze attack by her questionable companion, Pip. “Pip?” “Figured he might help you get through the movie.” “I don’t actually need a stuff--” Emily tried to explain, sick with a bad case of the open mouth, which Joyce the owner of a medical company prescribed with a pacifier. “It’s the banana one that you like?” Joyce tried her best to entice, and was unfortunately successful. Pulling the silicon out of her mouth she asked, “So that means if I do this, we can watch scary movies now?” “Don’t get ahead of yourself, buttercup,” Joyce firmly kept her expectations in check. “We are going to try this and see what happens. If I decide we’re stopping the movie, no complaints, understand?” Playing for brownie points, rather than a zipped lip, Emily opted for a pacifier between the lips. “Good answer,” Joyce pleasingly smirked. “Let me clean up these milkshakes and I’ll fill up your sippy cup.” And out came the pacifier. “I don’t need a sippy cup...I’m not thirsty.” “You will be,” Joyce knew Emily’s needs better than she did. “One less reason you’ll need to get up and go to the kitchen.” Life was all about compromises...so Emily didn’t push the issue any further. “So tomorrow’s Saturday, by the way?” Joyce broached a new topic with a sippy cup in hand. “And the day after is Sunday,” Emily cheekily added. “So it is.” Getting cozy on the couch was always the best. “I’ve been chatting with Amy a bit?” “Uh-huh?” “She’s been asking me all the time about those clothes that she made for you?” “...Uh-huh...” “Still not feeling up to it?” Now she was burying her head into her knees. “It’s embarrassing...” “And didn’t I say embarrassment is too big for you?” A good back rub always made Emily seem less tense. “You always get to have the final say, but I just want to remind you: She knows what the clothes look like, she knows that she had to make them with diapers in mind...and she knows they’re meant for you, Emily. The only thing she hasn’t seen is you in them?” In other words, Amy had all the pieces, she knew what the finished product was going to be. All that was left was to put the pieces in herself. “...What if she laughs?” “She won’t laugh, Emily. Not only would she know not to, but I doubt she’d make all these pretty outfits for you if she was just going to tease you for them?” “What if I said yes?” “Then tomorrow we would go see her. It’d give me a chance to actually have some more stuff made for you?” “More?” Emily spoke up. She didn’t know whether she was intrigued or a little afraid. She wasn’t sure why, but it was still a lot to take in regardless. “And wait, does she already think we’re going tomorrow?” “She knows that I said I would talk to you about it.” Joyce was explicitly clear. No joking this time. “No one has any expectations, Emily. You’re not hurting anyone’s feelings one way or the other.” “It’s just...I don’t wanna be the center of attention when I’m all...dressed like this.” “I can’t say that you’ll be; I wanted to talk to Amy for a bit too, you know? You can always go upstairs to her apartment if you wanna decompress? I’m sure Ashes will want to keep you company?” She smiled, knowing that definitely put a cozy feeling in her mind. “Yeah...” Emily nodded. “How long would we stay?” “The afternoon?” Joyce shrugged. “We didn’t talk about times. We go when we go, we leave when we leave. For as long as you’re comfortable.” Thinking noises starting leaking from Emily’s mouth, bogged down by troubling thoughts, she leaned against Joyce, hesitantly popping the pacifier in her mouth. “I...I guess we can...” She mumbled through the trinket in her mouth. “Okay.” Joyce said quite simply. “And if you change your mind, just let me know.” Sensing that a sensitive subject had already been poked enough, Joyce squeezed her shoulder while she dimmed the lights with the handy-dandy tablet that controlled it all. “And so, with all that out of the way, I guess we’ll move onto the much more ‘interesting’ part of the night...” Joyce sighed, becoming a mother wise to the proper ways of spoiling a little one. Apparently she had more learning to do though as she browsed for something on the tv that piqued her interest at Emily’s expense.

Don't know if you need to be jealous because most of it comes with having a Stroke and I don't wish that on anyone. It was just making it a bit more babyfied that made it a bit more fun.

Chapter 24: SOMETIME THE NEXT morning I became aware I was too hot. I felt Ivy’s strong arms squeezing me tighter as I tried to get loose from her gripping me like a teddy bear. “Morning Princess,” she told me and let me wriggle free. I looked at my watch and saw it was after lunch time. “Wow… it’s late.” “Yes, it is, we should probably get moving. Definitely need to get that diaper changed before you leak on Mommy’s bed!” I sat up and stretched as she got out from the covers and picked me up. “Actually, Mommy needs to go pee, why don’t you go wait by the changing table?” She sat me down pretty quickly and I wondered, ‘How close was she to an accident?’ I grinned thinking about the sweet justice of a Big having one! I followed her directions though and toddled my way to my nursery. I definitely needed a change! My diaper inflated enough that it made me waddle! I poked at it for a second and then wandered around my room wondering how long she was going to be. She was quickly there though, and scooped me up to change me. “The rash is looking better already,” she told me even as she had applied more of the cream. I wasn’t a huge fan of it because of the weird odor, and it seemed to stick a bit to the fabric of the diaper. She carried me to my closet and said, “What do you want to wear today?” “Are we going anywhere?” I asked her. She shook her head, “No, not planning to.” I looked at the wardrobe options and pointed at a one-piece creeper outfit that I knew was pretty comfortable. It was pink and had a lacy top section by the collar. It snapped all the way down the front through the crotch. It provided a small amount of material, almost like an ultrashort pair of shorts at the end. It was really babyish… but it was also really comfortable. Soon I was eating leftover pasta in my high chair. When I was done, she had cleaned me up, and I figured she was about to suggest nursing and a nap, when the doorbell rang. “Who could that be?” Ivy asked and picked me up. She placed me on her hip and walked to the door. I leaned with her as she looked through the peephole, “There’s no one out there?” She unlocked the door and we looked down to see the leader of the Hellcats wearing a set of BDUs. “Hi, what can I do for you sir?” “I’m Colonel Jackal, may I come in?” the man asked. “Umm… sure,” she told him. “I was hoping to speak to you two…” he told us as he walked in the door and Ivy closed the door behind him. I could feel him examining me from the top down as we sat down on the couch together and he sat on the opposite end after easily scaling the couch. I blushed at this ‘adult’ viewing me as a ‘baby.’ “Sure, what can we do for you?” Ivy asked. “First I want to thank you Doc, you managed to save a lot of lives yesterday.” “Not all of them,” I said sadly. “If you’re thinking about the terrorist, I urge you not to feel guilty. He made his choice, and you made the only one possible to save that baby. We would not have been able to save the baby if he’d been left alone.” I nodded, “Mentally I know that… Emotionally that’s going to take some time.” “Well regardless of the next thing I want to talk about, we have some people we can put you in touch with to help you deal with that. PTSD is a real thing and I would be shocked if you don’t suffer from it at least a little bit after this.” I nodded, “Thanks…” “You wanted to talk about more?” Ivy asked. “Yes… Look, normally I don’t come in and talk to adopted littles and their bigs about something like this. Usually we only recruit from free littles.” “Recruit?!?” Ivy asked suddenly. “Yes, recruit. Doctor Nickerson, Doc here is an incredibly talented doctor with a good head on her shoulders… We’ve done some checking and we think it’s a waste of her abilities to just leave her in a daycare pretending to be a mindless baby.” I thought for sure with something like that Ivy would tell him to ‘get the hell out of her house…’ “I agree Colonel,” Ivy told him. “What?!?” I said suddenly and turned my head up towards her. “I agree, I’ve felt guilty about this for weeks… but I don’t have an answer. Holly you’re adopted and if I just free you, it is exceptionally likely you’ll just be adopted by someone else… Someone that would be more like Bob…” she choked up then. I looked back at the man. “What are you offering her Colonel?” “Holly’s freedom. She would come with us and go through our boot camp… it’s all of the physicality of a normal military boot camp, along with intense potty training for a little like Doc. When she passes, she gets assigned to our hospital on the base, and she’ll have occasional deployments to be on scene for emergencies on ops.” “What about her adoption?” Ivy asked. “This agreement would render it invalid, and her credentials as a member of the Hellcats would prevent her from ever being legally adopted in the future.” “What about Ivy?” I asked softly. “Her claim on you goes away.” I looked up at her and the tears streaming from her eyes and realized I really had grown to genuinely love her. With no family in the other dimension there was nothing keeping me there… but here? I looked at my clothes and over at his BDUs and wondered if I really wanted a military life. Yes, I would be free… I could probably even get my body set to have a puberty and become a full-grown woman with kids of my own there… “How soon do you need an answer?” I asked him. “Preferably in the next week since we’ll have transport in the area, but this will be an open-ended offer,” he replied. “Length of my term of service?” “Two years minimum,” he told me. “Give me your contact information please?” I told him. We traded information and he left. Ivy sat down on the floor to where she was closer to my level. “Why didn’t you just tell him yes?” “Two reasons…” I told her standing at my height and realizing even then I wasn’t close to her shoulder. “One, making a snap decision led me here… maybe not the best of ideas…” I giggled. She gave me a thin grin, “Maybe not…” “Two… I’m not sure if that’s what I want...” I paused and sighed, “I’m… I’m also not sure I want to leave you…” With that she gave me a big hug and asked, “why don’t we go ahead and give you some boob milk and then maybe take a nap?” I nodded and waited for her to shrug her shirt out of the way. I was soon latched on and trying to figure out what I wanted to do. IVY LOOKED DOWN at Holly sleepily nursing from her second breast. There was a different sensation when she was really asleep and auto-nursing as she thought of it. It was like when she was nursing a pacifier instead, and she had definitely reached that stage now. ‘Why didn’t she just take that offer?’ she wondered. ‘It can’t be as simple as me…’ She carried her to the nursery and changed the damp diaper before placing her in her crib to nap. She grabbed the monitor and walked to the living room. As an afterthought she stopped and grabbed her phone from her bedroom and took it with her to sit down. She was just about to turn the TV on to watch something when the phone rang. “Hello?” “Hi, Doctor Nickerson?” “Yes?” “This is Marcus Wethington, I’m on the board of directors at the hospital?” She thought back to the fancy meet and greet fundraisers she’d had to attend and said, “Yes sir, I remember you. What can I do for you?” “Well first, how are you and your little… Doc is her name? Today?” “Her name is actually Holly… Mostly okay so far. Yesterday was a bit rough on both of us.” “Of course, sorry the news is calling her Doc... When they interviewed some of the littles parents from inside the daycare, she was all they could talk about.” “Oh? I haven’t watched any TV at all… I didn’t want to upset Holly if she saw it.” “Well at some point you should probably at least get a copy of the newspaper. She is being considered the biggest heroine ever for littles.” “Probably should be…” she told him, “I still can’t believe what she pulled off in there.” “Neither can we to be honest. Look, myself and the board really need to talk to you as soon as we can. Is there a chance we could stop by your house?” “Umm… I guess. If Holly needs something though I’ll have to take care of whatever she needs.” “Of course! Would right now work?” ‘What the hell is going on?’ she wondered to herself. “I guess…?” “You’re still at the address we have on file at the hospital?” “Yes sir,” she responded nervously. “Great, we’ll be by in ten minutes.” ‘Ten minutes?!?’ She suddenly realized she was still in her pajamas! She jumped up and ran to her bedroom and quickly put on some jeans and a t-shirt thinking that would be okay since she was at her house. She made a quick look around the house and saw there was too much stuff out for caring for a little… ‘No way am I going to have this house spotless…’ she thought. She did quickly move the swing, playpen, and walker out of the way to her bedroom. She had a few folding chairs she kept on hand for company, that she dug out in record time. She was just about to check on Holly really quick when the doorbell rang. ‘Good thing I soundproofed her room to where the ring doesn’t reach inside there…’ she thought as she hurried to the door. Standing at her door was the full board of directors… all eleven of them remaining after Bob was killed. “Good afternoon Doctor,” Marcus Wethington said as he led the way into her house. She grabbed the kitchen table chairs to add to the others in the living room. “Can I get you all anything?” “No thank you Doctor, we’re not planning on taking up too much of your time,” an older woman she remembered was Sylvia Pinkerton, one of the wealthiest women in town. “Well… umm… what can I do for you?” “Well… it’s more what we want to do for you,” Sylvia said. “Okay…?” she responded, ‘stop sounding like an idiot!’ She admonished herself. “We’d like to offer you Bob’s position,” Marcus said. “Me? Shouldn’t you be doing a search committee? CEOs are never just hired…?” She asked incredulously. “Normally yes… but in this case we believe we already have the best candidate. You’ve been running Pediatrics very smoothly for several years now. We’re sure that you would do a good job with the hospital as a whole. Add in the fact that the staff loves you, from the other doctors, to the nurses, to the custodial staff – absolutely no one has a negative thing to say about you.” “I’m sure there’s somebody,” she thought thinking of how many times she’d chewed out an incompetent person. “Not really,” Sylvia added her two cents. “Well…” she thought for a second. “I would have a condition…” I WOKE UP and found I was in my crib. I sighed as I thought, ‘If I took him up on that offer at least I wouldn’t have to be trapped when I sleep…’ I sat there thinking about the offer some more until Ivy must have seen me awake on the monitor. She came in and asked, “Awake now?” I nodded, “Change me please?” “Of course,” she told me and had me laying down on the changing table and in a new diaper. “How about we have a movie marathon for the rest of the day?” “Another one?” “Did you have something else you wanted to do?” I shrugged as she pulled my legs up into the air, “Not really…” “You showed me one of your fantasy movie series from back home, how about I show you one of ours?” “That might be kind of cool,” I acknowledged. “But… you like that genre?” with some surprise in my voice. “I’m a bit of a geek at times,” she told me with a smile as she wiped me. When she was done putting on the new diaper, she dressed me in another one-piece blanket sleeper instead of my previous outfit. “Pajamas already?” I wondered. “Don’t worry, I’ll go put mine on too. Then we’ll order some Chinese food for dinner?” I nodded, “Okay, sounds a bit like undergrad…” She smiled, “Yeah it does.” The night went by pretty quickly with a trilogy that would have been appreciated back home. Elves, dragons, and orcs were all enemies of humans in it. There was a love interest then with a human and an elf princess… Well, it was pretty good all things considered. My only issue with them is that apparently along with longer days, their ‘adult’ movie length was also longer. The trilogy lasted a couple hours into the new day and we were once again up waaaay too late! I fell asleep nursing that night trying to think of what I wanted to do about that offer. ‘I have a feeling that if I want to do it the Hellcats wouldn’t let Ivy say no over it…’ ‘I don’t know that I want to be in a military force though…’ THE NEXT MORNING came way too quickly for my tastes after the two consecutive late nights. Both Ivy and I looked like hell as she got us both ready that morning to visit her parents. She dressed me in a pretty, but really short, yellow dress with an attached onesie. I liked it for being able to hold up my diaper as it got wetter. ‘I’ve learned droopy diapers suck…’ I mused. Ivy liked it because it made me look like her adorable toddler. In the driveway of her parents’ house I counted the same number of cars from the last time we had come a couple months ago. For some reason Ivy had avoided all of these gatherings since then… ‘Why?’ I wondered. The last time had been really awkward with poor Janice’s situation. And, Kelly being a brat… And, Katie being whatever she was… As she stepped through the front door it was obvious that a lot of changes had indeed taken place since we’d come last. The biggest was a playpen in the middle of the room that held Janice sitting in a onesie and sucking on a pacifier. Her face looked all red, like she’d been crying. ‘He decided she would be a baby after all?’ I wondered. The person drawing my ire though was one of the first to greet us. “Hi Ivy, Holly,” Jonah came and gave us a hug. “Hi,” I said timidly. “How are you doing?” He asked me sincerely. I shrugged, “So far I haven’t had the nightmares I expect to happen.” “When they come, don’t be too afraid to ask for help,” he told me in a voice that was different than I remembered him using towards me on my previous visit. “I’ll remember that,” I told him, “Thanks. Ivy’s dad came over and greeted us with a kiss on the forehead. “There’s the hero!” he said to me. I blushed, “I don’t know about hero…” “I do,” Jonah spoke up. “The news definitely thinks you are…” he added. “News?” I asked. I looked up at Ivy. She shrugged, “We haven’t honestly watched it at all,” she told me. “I have…” her dad said, “Somehow they got a video of the takedown you did.” I felt my stomach turn a bit with that, “How much…?” “How much did they show?” Ivy finished for me. “All of it,” Jonah said. “Even…?” I asked. “Yes… most stations put up a blur over you two.” “Not all?” I asked “No, two local and one national just warned viewers,” her dad said. I felt my stomach doing weird things and swallowed back the vomit that threatened to come out. I think Jonah sensed that and decided to change the subject, “You want to set her down with Janie for a little bit?” “Why’s she in a playpen?” “Kelly and Janie haven’t been doing too well together on Sundays, so I offered to bring her pen. She chose to sit in it instead of playing with Kelly today.” I looked over at her again, then over at Kelly, who was bossily trying to get Julie to crawl by moving one hand and leg then another… Unfortunately, there was no way that would work thanks to the butchery Katie had done to the poor girl. Ivy looked at me and I nodded, “Sure for a little bit.” She hugged me and whispered, “I won’t go far and I promise it won’t be long.” “Thanks,” I whispered. The ‘adults’ moved to sit around on the couch on the other side of the living room. I looked at Janice and whispered, “Janice, what happened to you?” “Whadoyoumean?” she said around the pacifier. “You’re an adult?” I suggested. She shook her head and pulled her pacifier out. “Nuh-uh, my boss decided Daddy was right that I was just a baby… so she told me I needed to stay home with him.” “She fired you?” “Nope, I’m a baby! Babies can’t work! I get to go to Auntie Katie’s daycare now. It’s lots more fun! You should come! We could play and have so much fun together!!!” She smiled and moved the toy rattle she had up and down. I shook my head, “Umm… I have my own daycare my mommy takes me to…” Her larger frame meant that the playpen appropriate for her was a bit larger than mine at Ivy’s house. Even with the larger sized pen though, she was big enough that there wasn’t a ton of space in there. I ended up leaning with my back against the side of the mesh where I could look at her and also keep an eye out for Kelly. She was now talking to Ivy and showing her big girl panties off for some reason. It looked to me like she’d grown quite a bit just since we’d seen her. Her dad grunted as he picked her up and talked about how big she was getting. I looked back at Janice, “So umm… what about being married?” “Daddy adopted me, I can’t be his wifee no more,” she said. ‘So, he did do it…’ I thought. I was debating what else I could do to kill time when Janice stood up and crouched in what I had learned from experience was a poopie crouch. “Umm, Janie do you need to go potty?” I asked. “Janie goes potty in her diapees like all good girls,” she said with a giggle as she filled the back of the diaper. The smell hit me and I wanted to gag. I looked over at Ivy and made eye contact with a motion towards Janice. She stood up and came over, “Peee-eeeew,” she said, “Someone over here is a stinky baby!” She made a point of picking me up and sniffing me, “I know it’s not you,” she whispered, “I’ll get her changed…” “Not my Princess,” she said. “Janice are you stinky?” “Stinky!” she exclaimed and then happily sat down on her poop to smush it. She picked her up and said, “Jonah, your baby needs changed.” She definitely emphasized the word baby in such a way I could tell she wasn’t really happy about it. “She likes her poopies,” Katie said, “Just let her play in her diapee for a bit. It’s good for her to accept her place.” “She’ll get a rash or a UTI,” Ivy said angrily. “Well then you change her,” Jonah said. “I’m with Katie on this. If you want to change her, I left her bag upstairs.” “Ugh,” she looked at Janice, “Well since they’re too lazy, I’ll get you to being a pretty smelling girl again.” She moved her to her right hip and then reached down and managed to grab me and placed me on her left hip. “Definitely glad you’re an only child…” she said as she made her way up the staircase. She sat me down in the nursery and went to work on the oversized baby. “You knew?” I asked her as she undid the diaper. She tickled Janice a little to get a giggle and nodded at me, “It’s why we haven’t been coming on Sundays. I can’t stand to know they’ve done this to her.” “What all have they done?” I asked softly. “Hypnosis, the potty training went with drinking breast milk several times a day… that’s it so far I think.” “She’s that far gone from hypnosis?” I asked as she acted every bit as babyish as the brainwashed littles at daycare. She wiped her bottom for a few moments before saying, “Holly, if I wanted to, I could make you behave like a little newborn with our hypnosis tapes alone… You’d forget you could walk, talk, or even crawl…” “Thank you for not…” I told her as she balled up the poop filled diaper and put it in a diaper genie they had in the nursery. She had to push her shoulders back down on the changing table, “Not done yet Janie,” she told her. I watched her dig into the pink diaper bag that said ‘Daddy’s Baby Princess’ on the side of it in large, glittery letters. A huge new thick diaper was pulled out, and I could tell it was different than the ones she had been wearing before. “Is that a crawler diaper in her size?” I asked. “Yes… it is,” she said as she did both tapes. She picked her up and sat her on the ground on her feet. Janie held herself upright for two seconds and then happily fell down on her bottom and giggled. “You need changed yet?” she asked me. “I’m probably okay,” I told her feeling the padding. She reached over and did the same, “Yep, I bet you can make it through lunch.” “How long are we staying after lunch?” “Not long,” she told me. “I think neither of us really wants to stick around, right?” I nodded and looked over at Janice, “She’ll be like that forever?” “A long time at least,” Ivy told me. “I would say until my brother gets tired of her poopy diapers, but it’s pretty obvious Katie is telling him just to leave her in them so he’s probably not changing them often.” “Why is she so happy in them?” “One of the first things that Katie does at her daycare is condition her littles to happily stay in poopy diapers for half a day or more.” “How is that not abuse?” I asked. “I don’t know… It’s one of many reasons why I won’t send you there.” “What are we…?” I was about to ask when her dad came through the door. “Your mom says dinner’s ready,” he told her. “Okay. Can you grab Janice so I can carry Holly down?” “I’ll be happy to grab Janie,” her dad said. He tickled her bare foot as he picked her up and proceeded to throw her in the air a couple times as we followed them downstairs. Ivy carefully sat me down into the high chair and buckled me in the normal harness. I looked over at Janice being buckled into a high chair now just like Katie’s two littles were. Only her head was left free, her ankles and hands were both strapped down. That was the first time I saw some sort of mental recognition in her eyes as she looked at me with worry. ‘I’d guess she’s very close to being past the point of no return…’ I thought morosely. During lunch I stayed quiet, remembering the rules from before. ‘Her mom doesn’t seem so bad on her own… I wonder why she’s like this on Sundays?’ They all talked around me, and in a way I was grateful for not being asked about the terrible incident. Towards the end of lunch her mom said, “Looks like everyone is ready for dessert?” “Yep!” Jonah said. She disappeared for a few moments and brought out a cake with ‘Congratulations Ivy and Holly!’ on it. “Why does it say that?” I asked Ivy. She sighed, “Well… It’s up to you still what you want to do about the offer you were given yesterday… but I have a counter offer for you.” “Counter offer?” I asked hesitantly. “While you were napping yesterday the hospital board of directors came by.” “I slept through that many people coming over?” “I had your room completely soundproofed before you came,” she said with a smile, “It’s why I always have the baby monitor… Anyway,” she said, extending out her syllables on ‘any.’ “They came by to make me an offer…” “What offer?” “Taking Bob’s place as the CEO of the hospital.” “Wow! Congratulations!” I told her, “That’s huge, why didn’t you say something last night?!?” “Because I wanted to surprise you with this - and I needed Jonah’s help to expedite it with the city.” She handed me a greeting card envelope. ‘Congratulations to a Super Heroine!’ it said with a diapered figure that reminded me of Supergirl back home. I opened it and a document greeted my eyes, ‘Work Permit.’ I read through it and realized it was like a work permit for a teenager back home. This particular one was for any minor, including adopted littles, and with the signature of the judge who had signed it gave me permission to work any job for up to eight hours per day, six days per week. “What’s this for?” I asked while I moved it aside and looked at the space behind it. I looked up at Ivy as she said, “I refused to take the job unless they promised me something.” “What?” I asked her. “That if I could get a work permit for you, they had to let you join the staff of the hospital as a surgeon in the pediatrics unit.” “I thought…” “You couldn’t?” She laughed as she pulled the tray away and pulled me to her lap. “You couldn’t before… but when you saved the life of that baby - and single handedly probably saved half or more of the lives in that room? Let’s just say it gave you some bargaining power.” “How does that work though?” I asked. “The Hellcats said I would have to potty train before I could join… wouldn’t I have to do that at the hospital?” “They asked you to join?!?” Jonah interrupted from across the table. I nodded, “Open ended offer…” I turned back to Ivy, “So…?” “So, part of the deal is that the diapers are a non-issue. If we can’t retrain you - as long as you’re wearing a diaper - it’s fine. We’ll have some nurses who will certainly be willing to change you if I’m not around.” “That’s kind of scary,” I admitted to her… “If I’m doing this… what surgical team would even listen to me?” “The ones that were there that day for certain, but probably the whole hospital now.” “She’s right,” Jonah said, “I heard more than a few comments about that while I was standing around there.” “So… what… I become like Janice was?” I whispered so she could hear me only. “Yes, you’ll do what Janice used to do,” she replied to me louder. “Only you don’t have to worry about me pulling you out of your job.” She hesitated, “Unless you start doing a bad job…” I shook my head, “I wouldn’t… Will my degree and license cover certifications here?” “As of this morning they will,” she said and nodded to her mom who brought over a gigantic wrapped package. I carefully ripped the paper while Ivy steadied it, revealing my medical school diploma next to a certificate to practice medicine there in this state. I was crying by then, “Really?!?” “Really,” she told me. I hugged her as best I could after she sat the picture down. “Thank you, Mommy!” I told her. “I can’t believe you think she can do surgery…” Katie said, “I sure as hell wouldn’t trust her…” “Just shut up Katie,” Jonah told her. “No, this is stupid… why in the hell would you let her work? You figured out that Janie had no business being a big girl… now you think that her baby should be doing surgical procedures?” I watched as a surreal scene occurred then. Jonah stood up, grabbed Katie, sat back down, and proceeded to pull her dress up and started spanking her! When she began crying, he kept going for a while longer and then pushed her from his lap. “That little girl may be the size of a baby, she may even piss and shit her pants like a baby, but I guarantee you she’s more mature than you sis. So just shut the fuck up.” He looked at Janie then who was crying, “I’m sorry sweetheart… Maybe this is a sign I shouldn’t be listening to sis anymore.” He picked her up and began rocking her back and forth while Katie stormed out of the room in tears. “Jonah, next time let me be the one to spank Katie if she needs it,” his dad said. “That being said, she needed it.” “So…?” Ivy asked me. “I would really be able to do procedures? No daycare? Parents would trust me?” “I guarantee it,” she said. “There may be some that will ask to have another surgeon… and we’ll respect that, but I think you’ll have more than enough respect once they know you’re the famous ‘Doc’ who saved lives last week. I leaned into her and thought for a second, “Okay… but you promise? It almost seems too good to be true…” She laughed, “I promise this time you’ll be working your butt off as a full-time surgeon on actual patients.” “Shake on it??” She held her hand out and I shook the massive hand of the CEO who ran my new workplace. *********************************************************************************************** Well folks, that's the final full chapter. There's a small Epilogue that I'll post tomorrow to finish it off. Thank you to everyone who has commented and liked the posts along this journey! Please let me know your thoughts with a comment and/or a like!

Chapter 23: WHEN I HAD worked with the medical kits earlier, I had carefully concealed a scalpel inside the padding of my diaper through a small slit I made. I hoped I wouldn’t need it, but when I saw him going for the toddler I couldn’t help but draw the sharp blade free and leapt at him. The guns went off at the same time as our world exploded, but I continued wrestling with him even though he was a foot taller than I was. When he tried turning his gun back towards me, I decided it was time to end this and drew the blade across his carotid artery. He continued struggling as he gasped and blood sprayed everywhere, but I hung on for dear life. “Freeze!!!” a voice yelled at me, “Drop the weapon!” I carefully disentangled myself from the dead weight of the man, and then showed my hands. I had tunnel vision until then, and expected to look up at a large Amazonian SWAT team member like Jonah... But instead found myself looking at a little about six inches taller than me in full black tactical combat gear. He had his face hidden behind a mask. “Identify yourself!” He called out to me. “Doctor Holly Nickerson,” I told him. “Clear!” He called out, “You’re Doc?” He asked with his weapon still pointing at me. He motioned with his head around the room, “Nice work,” he said. Just then I heard a cry, “MEDIC!!!!!!” from one of the men. Over on the ground I saw two of the members of the rescue team were suffering gunshot wounds. “I’m a doctor, let me help one of them!” I told him. He nodded and I grabbed the supplies that were left. I didn’t know that it mattered by then, but I gloved up anyway and got to work on one of the patients while the corpsman worked on the slightly worse case. “You know what you’re doing?” He asked me. “I sure as hell hope so,” I told him and began working to slice away his clothing and the vest that hadn’t stopped the slightly off-center wounds. I counted three bullet wounds on my quick examination. Two were through and throughs in his side and right arm. More concerning though was another hole that was quickly filling with blood on his abdomen. I knew that was the bigger problem and focused on it. The trauma kits they gave me had some packing that I shoved into the wounds and ran a line with the universal blood they’d given me. I tossed a bag to the other medic too. “Thanks,” he said and we were both working on stabilizing the patients. Several other Amazon doctors, including Ivy, suddenly appeared to help out. Ivy began programming a nanite cluster and told me, “Get this to that first hole.” I took care to maneuver it to the side of the spleen and said, “It should be there.” “Get your hands clear,” she told me, “Activating!” Over the next half-hour we did a procedure to save the little’s life that would have taken six or seven hours in my dimension. I couldn’t help but also think without the nanites that we would have lost him just as easily as the two-year-old the day before my eviction back home. With both of the patient's vitals stabilized they were moved to an ICU unit for recovery. “You can’t go with them…” I heard a doctor try and tell one of the uninjured team members. “I’m a Hellcat, I go wherever the Hell I want! Don’t stop me!” One of the nurses, who I remembered Ivy pointing out as a real bitch the first time I’d been at the hospital, tried to block him. In no time flat I watched her laying on the ground crying with an arm bent unnaturally in an open fracture. “You idiot!” one of the nearby officers said as she tried to get an assault charge filed, “They’re Hellcats! You can’t do that kind of shit! They are protected by International Law!” I watched another young nurse follow the men, and thought that I may have heard her giggle. It was right then that I finally felt myself losing the rush of adrenaline that had carried me through the crisis. I looked up at Ivy, “Sorry, I probably did more stupid things today than in the history of littles.” She smiled and hugged me tightly, “I’m quite sure of that. We’ll also need to talk about your potty mouth!” She looked stern before smiling with tears streaming from her face, “but I’m also quite certain you are the bravest person I’ve ever known!” She nearly squeezed me to death before pushing me away, “That being said, if you ever do anything that stupid again…” “Just don’t send me to daycare again…?” I suggested hopefully. She laughed and cried simultaneously while hugging me. I looked up then and realized that her brother Jonah was standing there. He knelt down to where I stood and held out his hand. I let him envelop mine as he said, “You are the reason we only lost a few people today. You saved a lot of lives today… Thank you!” I felt a tear go down my eyes, “I just did what I had to.” He patted me on the head and hugged his sister tightly. “Ivy I love you to death, take good care of your little girl, she’s more special than I think you know.” She hugged him back, “Thanks for all you did Jonah,” she told him. “I really didn’t do anything. It was Little Miss Action Hero here and that insane little anti-terror squad. I didn’t understand why we were waiting, but now I know. The Hellcats are a legend in the Special Forces at this point. There’s not another unit that has the accuracy, speed, and tenacity to do something like that with no civilian losses. I know we couldn’t have made it in as cleanly just due to our needing bigger entry holes. Plus none of the terrorists expected to aim at their own height!” “Well, thank you anyway,” I told him. “You’re welcome Holly,” he said simply. “Ivy you had better bring her to Sunday dinner this weekend or Mom is going to kill all of us.” Ivy sighed, “Yeah… we’ll be there.” She gave him another hug and then held her hand out, “Well Doc, shall we go borrow a staff shower here and get you cleaned up before we go home?” I nodded and wondered at her not picking me up until I looked more at my body. I looked like I had been the one killed… ‘Good thing they have infectious diseases like STDs well under control here…’ I thought to myself. I walked beside her down the hallway and up a few levels. ‘Restricted Access Staff Only,’ was on the door that she swiped us through. A few nurses gasped as we passed them, and one rushed over and asked, “Doctor Nickerson, what happened to her? Why isn’t she down in the ER getting checked out?” She stepped in front of me, “Hi Kat… She’s fine, it’s not her blood. Doctor Nickerson here just saved a bunch of lives today, we’re just coming in here to get her cleaned up… you don’t happen to have a spare diaper and maybe some scrubs she can change into?” I looked around her at the face of the nurse who was confused, “I can see if pediatrics has any scrubs her size… I can grab a gown or a onesie for certain?” “We’d prefer scrubs, but otherwise what you can find works, we’re going to use the showers to get her cleaned up.” “I’ll be there shortly,” she said. IVY LOOKED DOWN at Holly who was aggressively ripping off her blood-soaked onesie. She used a pair of gloves to take it from her and put it in a hazardous disposal bin. Her shoes and socks soon followed, then finally the very well used diaper was removed and she wiped her bottom clean. “You’re getting a bit of a rash here Holly,” she told her. Holly shrugged and told her, “Not surprised… my butt’s been covered in pee and poop all day long…” ‘I might have some cream in the office… may have to raid a nurse’s station,’ she thought before saying, “We’ll get some rash cream on it as soon as we can,” and turned on the faucet of the shower head far above Holly’s head. Holly stepped into the shower and blood began peeling and making a gruesome pool on the tiled floor. She had been scrubbing herself for several minutes when Kat made it back out of breath. She whispered to Ivy, “Did she seriously perform two surgeries today? And, really take on the lead terrorist on her own?” “Yes…” she told her, “How…?” “She’s a good surgeon,” she told her back. “I took an important part of her life away when I adopted her,” she told her quietly. “What did you bring?” “Oh, here is a diaper. They only had some toddler and newborn in her size. Since she’s walking, I brought the toddler… Here’s some soap, a couple surgical sponges, wipes, rash cream, and the smallest set of scrubs I’ve ever seen in my life… I didn’t know we even had that size!” “I’m surprised we did,” Ivy told her as she looked at the purple scrubs that looked like they would only be half a size too big on Holly. “Apparently, we keep them on hand for when a little comes in with their wife for labor…?” she shook her head, “Let me know if you need anything else. Everywhere I just went had everyone proclaiming her the most amazing hero they know of…” Ivy gave a small smile at that, “That she is!” “Is it… Is it true about Bob?” Kat asked her. “Unfortunately, yes… they killed all of the daycare workers, Bob, and then his little girl.” Kat gasped, “What about the terrorists?” “All died in the rescue,” she told her. “Make sure you get her some counseling,” she told her in a whisper again. Ivy nodded, “Definitely.” She nodded towards the shower, “I need to give her this.” “I’ll see you soon,” Kat told her and left. She opened the curtain and said, “Holly, here is some soap and a surgical sponge set… are you able to get yourself clean of everything?” she asked her. A nod was her only answer as Holly took the items and turned to scrub every inch of her body she could reach. I COULDN’T FOCUS from the moment the water turned on. It startled me when Ivy handed me the soap and the sponge. I found myself on autopilot as I scrubbed all of the blood off of me. I was glad as I did so that I didn’t find any open wounds for myself to have been infected easily through. ‘I’ll have to request a blood screening to make sure I don’t have anything…’ My eyes wouldn’t focus as I was on autopilot scrubbing myself. The fact that I had saved multiple lives was offset by my memory of killing a man... ‘I don’t even know his name…’ I thought as I kept scrubbing… and scrubbing… “Here, I think you got everything but your back,” Ivy suddenly broke through my mind. “Huh?” I asked as she grabbed the sponge from me and gently turned me around. She scrubbed at my back for a moment and turned off the water. She wrapped me in a towel and picked me up in time for me to break down in tears. “I didn’t want to…” IVY FELT HER heart break as it was clear that the events had fully hit Holly. She would have gladly killed that man herself if she had the chance, but she knew she too would have been impacted. Here was her poor little girl… No little woman, she admitted - who had to kill when all she wanted in life was to save people. She hugged her tightly and kept her wrapped in the towel until she cried herself to sleep. “I’m sorry,” she whispered to her as she laid her down and dressed her in the diaper and the scrubs. Carrying her out of the room dead asleep, nurses and doctors alike gave the pair a nod. She had no idea what was going to come in the future, but she knew that Holly would forever be respected at this hospital. Everyone seemed to respect that she was sleeping and didn’t approach the pair, but she could tell that things had changed for Holly with the looks in everyone’s eyes. She wasn’t sure what was going to be the hardest thing to deal with to move on. ‘First thing once I get home is to take this soaked bra off and pump out the milk that I should have removed hours ago…’ she thought to herself as she carefully strapped Holly into her car seat. As she drove home, the magnitude of the day began hitting her as hard as it hit Holly. Seeing her mom’s car in the driveway didn’t completely surprise her as she drove up. ‘Mom is probably going to give me an earful for not calling…’ she sighed. ‘When the hell would I have done that?’ She backed into the garage around her Mom’s car, and then walked around to Holly’s side of the car. The poor girl was still out cold, but that didn’t really surprise her much. Her own body was threatening to shut down due to the adrenaline she’d used, and Holly had a much smaller body in way more intense situation! As she opened the door to the house her mom looked at her expectantly. “Mom, let me put her down in her crib first and then we can talk,” she told her. The hug was impossible to dodge just then as she held onto her, “I love you so much sweetie… I’m so glad that you and Holly are alright!” “I love you too Mom,” she told her. “Holly’s out cold though, let me get her to her crib. I’ll be back in a moment,” she told her. “Of course,” she told her. Ivy sighed as she opened up the nursery and took in the innocent sight of a room fit for a baby princess. It suddenly seemed wrong to her as she truly realized for the first time that Holly wasn’t just a misguided little that needed to be cared for like a baby. ‘I don’t think I can do anything else though…’ she thought morosely as she checked her diaper. It was dry as a bone, ‘I doubt she’s had anything to drink all day…’ She debated about trying to see if she could get her to nurse in her sleep for a moment when Holly stirred. I LOOKED AROUND the room and saw I was being held by Ivy in the nursery at home. I hoped for a moment that the day had been some massive nightmare, but looking down at my body clothed in scrubs I knew it wasn’t. I felt tears come out of my eyes then and looked up at Ivy who likewise had her own tears showing right then too. “You awake now?” she asked me. I shrugged, “I guess… I’m still pretty sleepy. Adrenaline crash,” I told her. “I’m not surprised, I’m dealing with my own right now. You want something to eat?” she asked me. There was a… catch in her voice right then and I wondered what that was about. I wasn’t really hungry, but I was thirsty. I saw that her bra was soaked and decided that I could help her and drunkenly land myself back to sleep where I could maybe forget about the last few hours. “Just your milk?” I said quietly. She looked surprised and I saw even more tears coming from her eyes, “Okay, we can do that.” She sat me down on the ground for a second and pulled her scrub top off to reveal the bra that had massive areas around both nipples discolored from dried milk. She pulled it free and flung it on the ground before using a baby wipe to clean herself off of crusty milk residue. Once that was done, she bent down and picked me up, before sitting down in the rocking chair. I was so thirsty - and so desperate to be asleep again that I practically leaped to her nipple and began sucking. Feeling the warmth of her breast, her teat on my tongue, and her heartbeat lulled me into a sense of comfort that I had not even dreamed possible a few hours before. Thoughts of everything faded away as the milk did its job and knocked me out. IVY SAT THERE holding Holly for several minutes after she passed out from the milk just staring at her nursing in her sleep. It lacked the urgency of the first moments Holly had latched onto her, and she had wondered what had brought that on. ‘She’s never been that… enthusiastic before?’ she thought to herself. She managed to get her to latch onto her second breast before she went to sleep. She’d slowed to not really sucking anymore though, and there was still some milk she needed to get out. She sighed knowing that Holly definitely wouldn’t be waking up to finish the job anytime soon. She felt Holly’s diaper, and found it was just a little bit damp. Normally she wouldn’t change her yet and risk waking her up, but with the bad diaper rash she had, she knew she couldn’t leave her in a wet diaper any longer than necessary. She laid her gently on the changing table and pulled her top and bottoms off as gently as she could. The top got caught slightly on her tangled hair for a moment, but miraculously Holly stayed asleep as she exposed her diaper. Gently she opened it, wiped her, placed a new diaper on her, and then dressed her in a light footless sleeper before laying her in the crib. Holly never showed any signs of waking up the whole time. Ivy skipped putting her soaked bra back on and pulled her scrub top on without it. She walked to the living room where her mom had sat down. “Dad’s not here, right?” “No, he stayed home to do some work around the house,” she told her with a smile. “Okay… I need to pump some milk and then I really need a shower before we talk.” “That’s fine sweetie, but I thought maybe Holly would have nursed you dry?” “She only made it through part of my second breast…” she sighed. Walking to the kitchen she gathered her pump and hooked herself up. The pump was soon working and she couldn’t help but think, ‘It’s so much better when Holly nurses…’ Her mom walked over to the table and sat down next to her, “Penny for your thoughts?” “Oh… I was just thinking…” “Thinking what?” She sighed, “It feels so much better when Holly does this.” Her mom nodded, “I always preferred you all over the pump too… Well, at least until you started biting when your teeth came in... You were the worst one on that.” Ivy blushed, “Sorry, glad Holly has never done that.” “It would be karma though, huh?” her mom said with a smile. They sat there quietly for a bit until she could tell it was okay to call it good and cleaned up without saying anything else. “I’m going to take that shower Mom,” she told her as she walked to her bedroom. “Okay dear, I’ll work on making some dinner for you two.” “I don’t know…” “At some point Holly is going to wake-up and she’ll be genuinely starving. You just worry about yourself right now, I’ll worry about you and my grand-baby,” she told her. “But…” “This is the part where you say ‘Yes, Mommy,’” she told her. Ivy sighed, “Yes, Mommy.” She did appreciate that her mother cared about how they were doing. The shower wasn’t long, as she couldn’t help but want to frequently check in on Holly. By the time she was out, had put on a comfortable stretchy top and yoga pants, she was convinced that Holly might have already woken up or something. However, when she checked in on the monitor in the nursery, she could tell that she was still soundly asleep in exactly the place she left her. She sighed with relief as she walked out to the kitchen. Her mom had just put a casserole dish in the oven as she sat down. “What did you make?” “Just a simple chicken pasta bake, it’ll be ready in about thirty-minutes,” she told her. “Thank you… you didn’t have to do that.” “Yes, I did, you’ve both just had a completely traumatic experience today from what little your brother told me.” Ivy nodded slowly, “Mom… I…” And with that she devolved into tears and her own Mommy wrapped her in a tight hug as all of the emotional insanity of the day came out at once. I SLEPT FOR a long while before I stirred. My room had blackout curtains so I couldn’t tell if it was still day or not outside, since the butterflies glowed either way. As I sat up, I could tell that I had been changed at some point into a sleeper… and I assumed a dry diaper. The one I had on didn’t seem to be wet, so I wondered ‘how recently?’ I stood up in my crib and stretched. I looked at the LittleProtect watch on my wrist and saw that it was about three hours after I last remembered looking at the time. I looked around the room and the dichotomy of the odd day hit me like a ton of bricks. ‘I just performed two emergency surgeries, killed the leader of a terrorist group… and yet I’m still sleeping in a damn baby crib!’ I was feeling annoyed as the door swung open. It wasn’t Ivy like I expected, instead it was her mom who came over and quietly said. “Mommy is sleeping right now; I came to help you two out tonight. You hungry?” My stomach chose that moment to grumble so I nodded, “I could eat…” I said nervously knowing how she always seemed one step from the crazy babying amazon type. She picked me up and felt my diaper, “Doesn’t feel very wet at all. Your mommy said you had a bit of a rash though, so let’s go ahead and change you to be safe?” I just nodded and went limp as she pulled open some crotch snaps that this particular sleeper had. The diaper was nearly dry, but I could see a bit of brown on the wipe as she did my butt. ‘Damn amazon breast milk…’ I griped. ‘Yet you went straight for the boob juice when you had the chance earlier!’ I shook my head. She had me dressed in a new diaper and back in the sleeper before carrying me to the high chair in the kitchen and placing a bib around my neck. “Give me a few minutes, I’ll have to heat yours with the microwave. You slept way past dinner,” she told me. I nodded, “It was a long day,” I told her. She nodded, “That’s what your Uncle Jonah said… He called and told me I needed to get over here. He only told me a little bit, but not everything. The news claims a bunch of pretty crazy things happened?” She placed one of my plates of food down on the trail filled with more pasta than I could ever eat. “Here, your mommy said you’d be able to feed yourself with a fork.” I stared at her in surprise and took the opportunity. I used the small fork I’d been given to stab the largest rigatoni noodle that could possibly exist and put it into my mouth. The pasta had an Alfredo sauce on it, and it was really good! “I guess that’s one way of putting it… what did the news say?” “Well they said that a group of littles had found some guns and decided to bring them to daycare to play with, thinking they were just toys?” I groaned, “So nothing about them being a terrorist cell?” “What?!?” She asked. “Surely you’re kidding. They were just littles who got some things they shouldn’t?” “Before I correct that idiocy, what else did they say?” “Well… one thing… they mentioned a little girl that everyone was calling ‘Doc’ managed to save the life of one of the babies in there?” I nodded, “Well that part is true… what else did they say?” “Well… they claimed that a mythical special forces unit, made up entirely of littles, was the group to make the rescue?” “The Hellcats I think they called them,” I nodded. “That part’s true.” “They mentioned that same little helped patch up one of those who was injured…” “Also, true,” I told her. “So, did they mention the body count?” “Body count? They didn’t say that anyone died?” I sighed, “You want to hear the true account?” “You’re not just going to make up some big fairytale?” I snorted and shook my head, “Believe me, if I were making up stuff, I would never come close to the reality of today.” I took another bite of the large pasta and chewed it before taking a drink from the baby bottle of juice she had sat on the tray. “Go ahead then?” She asked. “Ivy… I mean your mommy couldn’t talk about it…” “Things were going mostly okay this morning until all of the sudden two of the littles in the nursery pulled out some automatic weapons. They shot the three nannies that ran the room in the head, and then ten more of them came inside the room from somewhere. They had apparently run through and shot up the other nannies in the daycare on their way in.” “You’re…” “Not kidding, it happened. Ask Jonah if you don’t believe me after this…” I shook my head, “I checked on all three of them really quick to make sure there wasn’t anything I could do for them before joining the hostages in a corner. After a while the masked leader had me examine this little that they had broken in for.” “Was she shot or something?” I shook my head and took another quick bite of food, “No, she wasn’t responding to any of them, and had been in the newborn room... He wanted to know what had been done to her.” “And…?” I looked at her curiously and decided to hell with it, I’d be honest about what I felt. “Someone had butchered the poor girl and sliced up her Achilles tendon, along with another set on her biceps to keep her from being able to walk or crawl. They pulled all of her teeth out and performed what I guessed was a hysterectomy. They’d also performed a mastectomy badly as well.” “Badly?” “Most of the time surgery like that shouldn’t leave scars in this dimension… They had to have intended to leave scars…” I shook my head, “That’s really the only explanation for the massive scars I saw. I examined her and couldn’t get any signs of mental awareness out of her. I told them that if I had the girl as a patient back home, I’d diagnose it as a Persistent Vegetative State… He became beyond upset and I was worried he’d attack me for a second, before the police tried a first run at getting inside. The twelve of them pushed back and held them from coming in, but in the process a little two-year-old amazon girl was shot.” “They shot a baby?” She said in horror. “I’m not sure which side shot her, but yeah… I immediately began trying to stabilize her with what little I had in the nursery. Jonah and Ivy helped me out on the outside by getting me a few trauma kits and a stretcher for her. It was touch and go, but I was able to dig the bullet out and use the nanite kit they’d given me to get her back together.” “By yourself?!?” “I know you all have this blind spot to our height, but I really was a very good surgeon back home! Ivy was kind enough to let me study everything here to where I feel like I know more than when I left home even.” “Sorry… continue?” She asked. I took a few more bites of food to make her wait and fill my stomach some more. “After that they were negotiating and I pushed for them to let the baby go so they could care for her better outside. I pointed out that she wasn’t much use as a hostage anyway then… So, they made a trade for the CEO of the hospital who was the person responsible for the damaged little in the end…” “That must be the guy they say was accidentally shot?” I shook my head, “Nothing accidental there - and he definitely wasn’t shot. Once they learned of just how far the guy had gone with the poor girl, he was stabbed in the heart… Well, that’s after he had his same ligaments cut, and some of his skin peeled off,” I shuddered at the thought of it. Ivy’s mom looked at me in horror then, “Please tell me…” she shook her head. “Never mind, you warned me in advance this would be too big of a tale to make up… So, how’d you make it out?” “Well after that he shot the girl that they’d come for. He told me he did it to put her out of her misery. Then he really started pushing it with the negotiator again… I figured out that it was Jonah actually.” Talk about family connections! “He threatened to start killing genuine babies in twenty minutes. I distracted him a little bit by asking about the girl, and who was she? Turned out she used to be the leader of their faction until she was captured. Apparently, they had a pact that if this kind of thing ever happened to them, they would make sure they were never stuck living like that. He actually offered to include me in the pact…” Her face blanched at that, “What did you say?” “I politely declined…” I shook my head, “I like living! When we were done talking, I watched him moving to kill his first toddler hostage not far from me. That was when I did the dumbest thing of the day and leaped on him to try and stop him.” “He had a gun?!?” “Yep - like I said… dumb. I had hidden a scalpel in my diaper though and ended… end…” I hiccoughed from nerves and emotions coming back. “Ended up having to use it on him. I severed his carotid artery and held on until he was dead, while all hell broke loose around me with the rescue team of littles breaching.” “You… killed him…?” I nodded, “I had to… I couldn’t let an innocent baby die!” I felt tears going down my face then. “I’ve lost patients on the operating table before… but nothing prepared me to feel his life leaving him from a wound I made intentionally…” I choked back a full sob. I shook my tears back though then… “I was ordered to drop the knife and they held their guns on me until I identified myself. A few moments later I was working on one of the two members of their team who had beeb shot, while their corpsman worked on the other.” “You saved another life?” “Well for that one I had help. There were a number of doctors including Ivy that showed up to pitch in…” I told her. “Don’t let her fool you Mom,” I heard Ivy and jolted in surprise. “This little girl is one of the best surgeons I’ve ever seen, and she is the reason two people are alive medically today. And, probably a lot more by her fearless actions. She’s an amazing real heroine…” she told me as she came and kissed my head and hugged me. “You’re supposed to be asleep?” I suggested. “So are you?” I shrugged at that and took a few more bites of my food that was getting colder. “Is there a chance you could heat this up again?” “Sure,” Ivy said and took the plate from me. It was steaming when she returned it a few minutes later. I munched on the rest of it while the two of them talked a little until I was full. As much as I hadn’t eaten much real food that day, I still left a lot on the plate. I burped and said, “Excuse me…” “She is so much more polite than Katies kids…” Ivy’s mom told her. I blushed but said, “Thanks…” At that point she stood up and came for my plate, “I’ll do the dishes here if you want to get Holly cleaned up?” I looked at my hands and face, wondering what there was to clean up, but just sat patiently while Ivy unstrapped me and wiped my hands with a wipe anyway and removed the bib I was wearing. She returned to her seat at the table with me in her lap. The warmth of her body was surprisingly reassuring and I leaned back into her shoulder and watched her mom do the dishes. The bottle of juice I hadn’t quite finished was presented to me, “I’m guessing you’re still pretty dehydrated, drink this.” Ivy told me. I nodded, “Probably…” I nursed it dry and commented, “I’m going to feel like I have a hangover when I wake up tomorrow at this rate…” Her mom looked scandalized by my comment, “How do you even know what a hangover is?” “Umm… Because I’m really an adult? And in my dimension from the age of twenty-one I could legally drink?” I giggled thinking back, “And I definitely had one the day I came here!” “Oh…?” Ivy asked, ignoring her mom’s face. “You did?” “Well… In case this was really how things went… I figured I might as well go out with a bang?” Ivy nodded, “I don’t drink, but I could see it…” “I didn’t really normally either, but in that case, it seemed like a good idea at the time.” “Well… I got those dishes done for you Ivy… You should have enough leftovers for at least lunch tomorrow. I’m going to go ahead and get home and make sure your dad hasn’t destroyed the house.” Ivy stood up then and placed me on her hip. She walked over to her mom where she was gathering her purse, “Thanks Mom for coming and looking after us.” “You’re my baby, it’s just what you do,” she said with a smile. Ivy gave her a hug with the arm that wasn’t supporting me. “I love you Mom.” “Love you too,” she told her and then gave a peck on my forehead. “And I love this little grandbaby too! Be a good girl for your Mommy!” We watched as she gathered her purse and walked out the front door with Ivy locking it behind her. She carried me to the large couch in the living room and sat me down next to her, “Can we talk?” she asked. “About?” “About you? About whatever it is I’m going to do with you?” “I thought you’d decided that before I even came to your world,” I told her tepidly. “I had…” “Had…?” “I could have picked another little you know?” She wiped a tear from her eye, “I told my adoption agent on this side I wanted a little girl. The one from your side was insistent though that I would love you to death. The idea of a little doctor was astonishing to me and she managed to convince me you were the one.” I nodded, keeping my face passive. ‘Where is she going with this?’ “From the time I first saw the video of you performing surgery I fell in love with you. You were doing things in really outdated techniques there, but you were clearly incredibly skilled! Your calm and collective manner in the theater was amazing to me… and I almost decided you needed to stay there then…” “So, what changed…?” “I couldn’t help wanting you still… and you were willing to come.” I nodded, “Not one of my brightest moments looking back.” She looked hurt at that. “Look… I forgive you for that part, I honestly have gotten some good out of it. No worries about finding a job or a new place to live… I just hate that I can’t do what I love here.” She nodded, “I hate that too.” She leaned over and squeezed me in a hug, “I’m so proud of you for today. The way you saved that baby’s life! And then saving that other man too!” “Well I wasn’t alone on the man…” “He would have died if treatment had been delayed even one more minute - you know that!” “Maybe…” I said. “All I could think of earlier was that I was glad I didn’t lose that little girl…” I looked up at her, “The day I lost my apartment back home was the day after I had lost a girl on the table…” “Bad?” I nodded, “Car accident… We worked on her for like fourteen hours… I thought we had her stabilized multiple times only for another problem to come up. She had multiple places she was bleeding internally and we just couldn’t find them all.” “I know the feeling,” she told me. “I’ve lost patients too…” “It sucks…” I told her. “Days like today are always nice though.” “They are,” she told me. “Except the whole terrorist part…” I shuddered at that, “That…” I wiped tears from my face, “That part sucked…” “Are you going to be okay?” She asked me. I shook my head, “Not overnight, no.” I told her honestly. “I assume I’ll have nightmares for a long time about the whole thing… especially from when I… when I… when I killed him.” She picked me up then and cuddled me as I quietly cried. “Even in your world it would have been okay to cry about this,” she told me and hugged me. I nodded. After a long while she asked, “So are you feeling tired right now?” I shrugged, “I… I don’t know… not really?” “Me neither,” she said. “Want to watch a movie or something?” I shrugged, “I guess…?” “Go watch one of yours?” she suggested. I thought for a second, “You know… there’s one you might appreciate…” I hesitated, “And… we can watch it until we fall asleep because it’s a long trilogy…” “Oh…?” “You bring the popcorn?” I suggested. “After a change?” she countered. I made a face and realized that once again the damn diaper was wet. “That first I guess…” She carried me to the nursery and changed me. “You want something else to wear?” I shook my head, “This is pretty comfy actually,” I admitted about the sleeper. She sat me down on the floor while she worked on popcorn and filled some drinks up. I watched her leave the room for a moment before coming back with a gigantic fuzzy blanket that was covered in the picture of a children’s show cartoon character from this dimension. I noted it looked older and asked, “Is that your special blankie?” She blushed, “Maybe?” I giggled at her, “Maybe, huh?” “I’ve had it since I was in college…” “And they didn’t give you a hard time…?” “My roommate was just as bad…” she tried to excuse herself as she gathered everything and walked to the back door. She opened it up and led me out back to the playhouse. The night sky was dark and I could just see some stars peeking out even through the city lights. It was a quick trip to the playhouse where she opened up the Amazon sized door and motioned me inside. I went to the TV and worked to find the cases I was looking for, and cued up the first Lord of the Rings movie. “I thought you told me you don’t have littles in your dimension?” She asked confused. I smiled at her, “This is fantasy… and they’re Hobbits…” Somehow the surreal fantasy was truly a great way to deal with the day as the night wore on. The violence made my stomach cringe in light of the day, but there was something comforting in Tolkien’s tale. My favorite quote of it especially gave me hope. Frodo said, “I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.” Gandalf replied, “So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” That night I stayed awake until the White Ship set sail for the West. IVY LOOKED DOWN at Holly and couldn’t help but think, ‘That was actually really good…’ She was surprised that both were still awake after the nearly twelve hours of the trilogy… She’d had to go to the bathroom and changed Holly out of one poopie diaper. She was definitely wet now, having been given a never-ending amount of Plapple juice in bottles to try and rehydrate her. Actually, she noticed that she was leaking quite a bit. ‘Oops…’ she thought, realizing she was wet too. “Come on you, let’s get you changed…” she told her. “Yeah… I leaked…” Holly told her. “Yep, but it’ll wash,” she told her while squeezing her reassuringly. She stood Holly up on her feet and was surprised that she was still standing without much fatigue showing. Gathering the blanket, she put the empty baby bottle and her own cup inside the popcorn tub, before opening up the door to leave her playhouse. They wordlessly walked to the kitchen where she deposited the items in the sink to deal with in the morning. Then she led Holly to her nursery. “Let’s get you changed and then see if we can’t both get some sleep…” she told her as she picked her up. She unzipped her from the sleeper and pulled her free of the garment that had a noticeable set of wet crescents around the legs. The tabs of the diaper made an audible ‘scrich’ sound as she pulled them open. Ivy grabbed Holly’s ankles with one hand and pulled her butt from the soaked diaper. She took the moment to grab a baby wipe and wiped her clean of all of the pee and a little bit of poo from her bum. Opening a new diaper up she sat Holly's butt on top of it and wrapped the old one in a ball to put in the diaper disposal. ‘Definitely need some more rash cream on her… oops…’ she thought. Her bottom wasn’t redder, but she shouldn’t have left her in a wet diaper that long again. ‘I wonder if I can get her to wander around naked for a while tomorrow…’ She shook her head, ‘I wouldn’t want to… I need to…’ she sighed and finished up the job of putting more rash cream on and then rubbed it gently all over her bottom and a little on the other red spots on her front. She closed the diaper and then dressed her in another sleeper. “Would you like to nurse for a bit?” Holly looked up at her and sighed, “You know I really don’t mind that part of it. I don’t like that I lost my potty training because of it…” she wriggled for a moment upright in her arms, “It’s comforting though, and whatever hormones your body produces in it makes me feel good. The dopamine or whatever it causes to release… I like that part…” Ivy squeezed her, “If we stopped you might regain your control…” Holly shook her head, “As long as I’m living with you though you’ll continue to produce your milk. It’s not worth you being miserable… or breaking my addiction with it at this point. Besides from what I can tell from the research it’s about a fifty-fifty shot at regaining control after eight weeks.” Ivy felt even guiltier, “If you change your mind, I’ll do everything I can to potty train you.” Holly sighed, “Just pull your boob out already?” She smirked at that, “So all I am to you is a set of walking boobs?” “Well… if the bra fits,” Holly stuck her tongue out at her afterwards. She couldn’t resist tickling her for a second and sat down in the rocking chair. Ivy pulled the top of her pajama set she was wearing down and helped Holly latch onto her. It was a pleasant sensation for Ivy as Holly sucked the milk out of her breast. Too pleasant… she was just as addicted to the sensation as Holly was from the milk. ‘I can’t keep her as a baby though,’ she thought to herself. ‘Sending her back to that daycare is definitely not an option now… I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do…’ She burped Holly gently before switching her to her other breast. Ivy noted that while Holly was a little more flexible and relaxed from earlier, she was still really tense as she nursed the other breast. There was no sign of her going to sleep as she drained her right breast. She burped her and wiped her breasts with a wipe, noting the wide-open eyes still. Thinking for a second, “How about you sleep with Mommy tonight?” Holly looked at her and said, “That…” she could see her think for a second, the wheels turning behind her eyes, “That sounds good actually…” Ivy carried her to her bedroom and left her on the bed while she went to the bathroom and pulled her hair back. Holly stared at her the whole time, really only moving to by one of her pillows and leaning on it. Done brushing her teeth she pulled the covers back and cuddled Holly to her. “I love you,” Holly suddenly told her. She was shocked and felt tears stream down her face as she squeezed her small body even closer to hers. “I love you too Holly Bear,” she replied. Eventually both fell asleep wondering what the new day would bring. No matter what both knew their worlds had changed. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ That was a long chapter, but I just couldn't bring myself to split it up. Thank you to everyone who has read, liked, and commented on this story!! There is one more chapter and an epilogue remaining. If I get enough likes (25 seems good) I'll post Chapter 24 tomorrow and the Epilogue on Saturday. (Otherwise I'll make you wait until Saturday and Tuesday like a mean authoress)

Monday morning dawned with my wife standing over me. It was clear I was in a puddle. I was barely surprised. “That’s second and last strike, you know. If you do it again, you lose the bet.” She smiled. I yawned and stretched. “That’s OK, things are going better today, and I’ll be able to get to the bathroom as I need to. Tonight I’ll just pull an all nighter.” Getting up, I bundled the wet sheets and pajamas into a ball and brought it to the washer, starting the load. A quick shower and breakfast, and I was soon engrossed in work. Every 15 minutes, though, the alarm on my phone rang, and I would dutifully trek to the bathroom, shake off the uneasy feeling, and drain whatever I had. Lunch came and went, and soon it was dinner time. The interrupts kept my day from being very productive, but it was the only way I could possibly make it. “Good heavens, are you still trying to win?” My wife was in the door, doing her best Count Rugan impression from the Princess Bride. I had to laugh. “Want to go out for dinner? Pub?” It did sound good. It was not a good idea, though. “I don’t think I should. If I drink, I’ll lose, and if I don’t drink, Frank will annoy the hell out of me.” She laughed. Frank was the bartender, and as his regulars he felt the need to engage us in conversation. A standing joke was to tell Frank that he needed to shut up or bring us a beer. He’d usually bring us the beer and continue with whatever story he was telling. “We’ll grab a booth.” “No, I shouldn’t go” “I’ll go then. You can have leftovers.” “Well, that’s not fair.” “Come with me then. I really need a glass of wine, and we’re out of white.” “I don’t want another accident in public!” She switch to Black Knight from the The Holy Grail. “What are you going to do, pee on me?” My response was immediate. “I’m invincible!” “You’re looney.” She paused. “What if...” She paused again. “What if I let you wear a diaper, but it wouldn’t count against the bet. Well, the diaper wouldn’t but if you wet it it would. That way you can come with me, you can just have water or whatever, and if you do have an accident no one will know. Except me, of course.” That sounded like a horrible idea, really, but her mind was obviously made up about the pub. At least this way I wouldn’t risk a public accident. I sighed. She took it as acceptance and disappeared briefly, returning with a thin disposable that she handed to me. “Remember, if you wet it, you lose the bet. And you know I’ll check.” I put the diaper on, a onesie to cover it, and we headed to the pub. I only had water, and continued the 15 minute periodic pilgrimage to the to bathroom. Frank only bugged us slightly, especially after I told him that I wasn’t drinking because I had a bad case of whooping west nile virus, cough cough, and alcohol enhanced the transmission rates to ugly bartenders. He laughed, but took the hint and mostly left us alone. I have to say I was somewhat surprised when I managed to make it back home with the stripes still a happy yellow. My wife was in a frisky mood, and I was happy oblige. We started downstairs, but moved upstairs after a while, ending up on the bed in each others arms, both spent, her several times. It was as I was laying there that I felt my wife reach down and pat the mattress, then get up suddenly. “You wet.” “No I didn’t. That’s the wet spot.” “Urm. No. That’s a big pee spot. And you’re dehydrated.” I looked. It was a big spot. A big, clearly dehydrated-pee-yellow spot. That smelled like dehydrated pee. Clearly centered between my legs. “That’s two beds you’ve wet today. And a couch.” She smiled. “You know what that means...” I was stunned. It seemed so anti-climactic, especially after working so hard the last two days to not have a problem. And here I was, laying in my own pee. Again. I was still in my own thoughts as I realized with a sinking feeling that my wife was slipping something around my neck, and before I could react I realized the collar was locked with the tether attached. By the time I tried to sit up, it was too late. “Honey, one more chance. I’m sorry, it was just the sex, and the climax, I mean, you were so wonderful, and I just forgot. Please, give me one more chance.” I tried to sit up again, but the tether kept me on my back. “You lost. Say it with me. Yoooooou Looooooost.” She was definitely gloating, almost doing a little dance. “And here I was almost thinking that giving you that extra strike might have been a bad idea!” “But I’ve been so good, and got so close. C’mon, honey please.” I was whining, and I knew it. She stopped and looked at me, suddenly serious. “How about double or nothing?” I didn’t even hesitate. “Sure. Whatever, please just give me one more chance.” “Are you sure? You don’t even know the terms yet. Are you sure you want to do this?” I paused. She was right. “What are the terms?” She held up the cuffs and chain. “Lets get these on first. I don’t want to have to fight you later.” “Do I have to?” “Yes.” OK, then. If it meant I got another chance, so be it. She made me put the cuffs on myself, their little LEDs indicating that they were not coming off without the right signal. She attached the chain even shorter than usual, giving me just inches of movement. “So, here are the terms. You have until noon tomorrow. Since I don’t think that you’ll be able to make it, you’ll be wearing a diaper until then. If you wet that diaper, even a little, you lose. If you do lose, the trainer goes on until I decide to remove it. I will continue to have full responsibility for your diaper changing, and will be taking more direct control over when you can remove your diapers. You may lose certain other privileges depending on how cooperative you are. Lastly, and most importantly, you’ll become the first subject in Phase II. Do you accept these terms?” “Obvious question... what’s Phase II.” “Well, you’re doing very well I think, and I’ve actually gotten into this whole behavior modification thing. It’s amazing what kinds of changes in a person’s behavior we can cause just with some subtle carrots and sticks that are consistent and automated. It’s a really interesting experiment.” Again, she’s such an engineer. And I’m obviously the test monkey. Guinea pig. Lab rat. She continued, “Officially, the project I’m working on now at work is titled ‘Behavior Modification Through Automated Immediate Stimulus’, which sounds very academic but so far has been sold as looking for better ways to address bedwetting. The stopping of it, normally, but obviously your case is a little different. Phase II is a little more advanced... I will try to address some other behaviors of yours. No, I won’t tell you what.” She smiled sweetly. “How long will it last?” “Until the study is over. When I decide it’s over. I don’t know.” “And if I decline?” “Well, you’ve already lost, so as we agreed when we set up the bet you get another little while on the current program, and we’ll do our best to make your diapers a permanent addition to your wardrobe.” “And if I’m able to make it? What’s your double? A month in diapers for you?” “At this point, you’ve already lost that bet. The upside for you is only that you might not have to wear diapers for the rest of your life. If you make it, I’ll let you out, and maybe even help you by using you in the ‘official’ program to make sure you’re actually dry.” She held all the cards, I realized. The best I could do, I thought, was to try to make it to noon tomorrow. The only way out was if I was actually able to make it. Even if it meant I had to stay up all night. “If I take the bet, will you remove the trainer?” “OK. But the moment you lose it goes back on.” “Can I use the bathroom right now?” “Yes.” “Then I’ll take the bet.” She released the tether and the chain between the collar and cuffs, but of course the collar and cuffs stayed on. I got up, and since I was already naked I made it to the toilet, sat down, and peed. I returned to find my wife in the other room, laying out a diaper. I paused. She looked at me. “I don’t want have to wash the sheets again. If you want another chance, these are the terms.” She pointed at the waiting diaper. I went over and lay down. As she pulled up the thick cloth between my legs and pinned it, I realized that if I did lose, I was giving up the last night without a diaper for what would likely be a long time. After making sure I had on the plastic pants, she retired to her room. I threw a onesie on to hold everything together. Determined to stay up all night, if necessary, I went to my office to work. Every 15 minutes when my phone alarm rang I trekked to the bathroom, unsnapped the onesie, unpinned the pins on one side, peed what I could, and put everything back together. It must have been 4 in the morning when I woke with a start, nearly falling out of my chair. I panicked. Yep, I was wet. Crap. But my wife was asleep! If I simply changed out the diapers before she got up, she’d never know. I wasn’t wearing the trainer, so there was no electronic record of my failings! I just had to make it until noon. The pile of clean diapers was in my room, and I quickly grabbed dry ones, unpinned the wet diapers and re-pinned on the replacements. Now, what to do with the wet ones? It was too loud to run a load of wash right now. I’d have to hide them and wash them later. I got a plastic trash bag, and hid them in my office. I risked a cup of coffee; the risk of falling asleep and peeing again was worse than the risk of the caffeine causing other problems. Soon it was 7 AM, and I heard my wife’s alarm, followed shortly after by the sound of the shower. I started a cup of coffee for her. A few minutes later, she emerged, only a little bleary eyed. “Good morning honey.” The cup of coffee brought a smile to her face. “You look like you stayed up all night. Everything OK?” She looked meaningfully at my diaper. “So far.” She shrugged, and went into her office and closed the door. I figured it was that kind of morning. She stayed there all morning. I heard her on the phone for substantial parts of the morning, and it sounded like she was dealing with a pressing work issue. For my part, I continued using the toilet every 15 minutes, even though the lack of sleep was definitely catching up. At 11:30, though, I figured I had a chance to make it. I had even taken a chance and slipped a load of laundry with the diapers I had wet mixed in with a bunch of clothes. I had managed to get the load washed, dried, folded, and even put away before she emerged from her office at 11:50. She looked harried and annoyed. “Come into the bedroom”, she said quickly, in a way that indicated she was in a hurry and still thinking about something else. I followed behind her. “On the bed, let’s check and see if you’re still dry.” I lay down. This was the moment. I was still dry. She would check, and I would win. I watched her hand go down between my legs and unsnap the onesie. She pulled it up. She started to pull open the top of the plastic pants, when I realized that her other end had just clicked the tether to my collar. Dammit, she was getting good at that. She stepped back, the plastic pants snapping back against my waist. I tried to sit up, but once again I was held on my back, unable to move, by the tether to my neck. She looked at me, clearly disappointed. “I didn’t think you’d make it, but I expected you to try harder than this.” I acted innocent, of course. “What do you mean? It’s still dry!” “Why are you wearing a different diaper than what I put you in last night?” I paused. How to answer this. I didn’t have a good excuse. How did she know? She snickered, reading my mind. “You look like a toddler, there. Laying in a diaper. Trying to think up an excuse. There is only one diaper with a green serge at the top. All the others are blue or pink. You were wearing the green one last night. Now the diaper you’re wearing so proudly has a blue serge thread. Why.” I just looked at her. Why indeed. Busted.... “You could have just taken that one off, put a disposable in it... I can think of a bunch of ways you could have tried to cheat. Not that you would have gotten away with it, but I’m rather unimpressed with your lack of ingenuity. Oh well, come clean. You had an accident, right?” Sigh. “Yes.” “OK, then as we discussed yesterday, you lose the bet, as you know.” She left for a few moments, and then came back. She applied the chain to hold my hands at the collar, and proceeded to remove the plastic pants and unpin the diaper. The familiar trainer was quickly applied. I didn’t fight it. All I could do was watch in resignation. “What’s that?” I asked, as she was putting a thin paper thing on top of the diapers. She slid it under me after asking me to lift up. “Since you lied about when you changed your diapers, I’m going to be determining when and where you get changed. This is to make cleanups easier.” I was still confused. I looked at her. “You’re not going to be able to choose when to use the toilet. You will have to use your diapers for everything. This is to make cleaning your poop easier.” I was horrified. “Honey, I don’t like using my diapers for pooping! I’ve never done that! That’s disgusting!” She laughed. “Well, I’m glad that you accept that you like using your diapers for peeing. But you lied about changing your diapers, and the consequences are that you lose that privilege. The pooping in them is just a side effect. I’m sure it will be unpleasant for both of us.” For some reason I rather doubted that it would be as unpleasant for her as it was for me. She was pulling up the plastic pants, and I realized that the material was much thicker. The waist had a belt, and I was unsurprised as a little LED blinked green as it was closed. I looked at the on the clock on the bedside table. It was 12 noon. A strong shock signalled that it was time to pee. I did. =====

When my wifes in the mood, she lets me stand behind her and I take my member and insert it in one of her holes, we then diaper ourselves together with one XL diaper and then I urinate into her which eventually winds up coming out wetting the diaper and she also wets at the same time I do. We are both left in a diaper that's wet from each other. Okay, that never really happened. Just wanted the shock value. Sorry if this offended anyone.