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Chapter Thirty Seven Amanda woke at 5:30, reaching out to smack her alarm the moment it went off. It hadn’t woken up her son at any point before, but somehow it being extra early made it seem even worse if he was woken up by it. Getting out of bed and getting dressed was a quiet and slow affair. Considering herself a morning person was one thing. Getting up early enough to meet Mr Frank was another thing entirely. In fact, she was convinced that he was one of those old men that wakes up at 4am somehow magically having a coffee cup in his hand and talking, at length, about the weather. He then took a nap shortly after noon, and then woke up with coffee in his hands and staring at every meteorological chart he could find. Mr Frank was a retired weatherman, and apparently his sleep schedule reflected that. So with a deep sigh, she shuffled to the coffee maker and got a pot going, making sure to fill it all the way so that she could top off his thermos when he came by. Stopping to splash a bit of cold water from the sink in her face, she got a big glass of ice water to sip on while she waited for the coffee. Of course Xerxes knows the routine and was already waiting by the door to be let out. Fixing a cup of coffee, she barely had the back door open before Xerxes was out of it, whining. Pausing only to turn the porch light on, Amanda stepped into her garden boots and walked over to the gate facing the driveway. As she got closer, a whining Xerxes was standing there trotting in place doing his own version of the potty dance. Opening the gate for him, she instructed “Go find your perfect potty spot.” And he was gone into the field between the driveway and the woods, smelling around and looking for the exact spot he wanted to relieve himself this morning. Silly dog. Amanda took a moment to stretch a bit and mentally wake up enough to finish harvesting the last of what she needed to have ready in a couple of hours. She got a bucket and a foam kneeling board and got to it. It seemed a bit more boring without her gardening little to entertain her, and Xerxes laid down in the walkway to watch her. But she got the rest of it done in time just like always. By 7am all of the buckets were lined up by the fence, and the milk crates of jars were on the porch. When she heard the sound of tires on gravel, she walked to the gate to see a well kept older truck coming down the driveway. Behind the wheel there was an older gentleman with salt and pepper hair, and in the passenger seat there was a large Brown Shepard dog with its head out the window. As the truck pulled up close to the fence, she watched him lean and open the passenger and could head “Go on” before watching Victor jump out of the truck and run over. She got to pet the large dog for about five seconds before Xerxes ran up to him. As dogs do, they spent a moment smelling each other, and then ran off into the field to sprint back and forth, occasionally barking at Steve the squirrel. Every so often they would see a bird to go bark at. As the two dogs ran off, Mr Frank walked up and held out his hand. “Good morning Miss Taylor.” “Mister Tempes, we have been doing this for two and a half years. And every time I tell you to call me Amanda.” He laughed “And every time I tell you that I will call you by your last name when I greet you.” They shared a chuckle for a moment before he spoke first. “Amanda, you look pretty happy this morning. What’s going on these days?” Now she couldn’t help but smile “Well Frank, last week I found a little and it’s been a pretty amazing experience.” While they loaded buckets and plastic crates into the back of the truck together, and she filled his thermos as a courtesy, Amanda recalled her experience with finding John, and everything they had been through together. By the time they were done loading everything, Mr Frank nodded “Huh. Go figure that there would be a rift up the way. I’m glad that you were there for him. Sounds like I’d like to meet him some time!” She waited patiently as Mr Frank went to the glove box of his truck and came back with an envelope. “Here’s your half from the last two weeks. You know all your tomatoes, pickles, and peppers will be gone by noon, right?” That made her smile “I’m glad that people enjoy them. That makes this a hobby that pays for itself, plus enough to pay the utilities.” With a nod Mr Frank advised her “We have about a month and a half left of prime growing season. This weather today is going to be the best we’ll see for a while though. Cold front coming through is going to stay for a week, so if you plan to open all your windows and let the breeze through, do it today.” Laughing now, Amanda admitted “I guess I’ll need to make sure John is wearing long pants and a shirt when he goes outside next week. Getting him to wear shoes is harder than I want to admit, though. Speaking of, it’s almost time to wake him up.” Holding out his hand to shake her own, Mr Frank said “I have to go get the stall set up anyway.” Taking his hand with a laugh, she admitted “There’s no way I’d go back to doing all of that and selling to so many people.” As he corralled Victor back into the truck he mentioned “But you know that’s how we met and made out arrangement, so it worked out well in the end. As Mr Frank was getting back into his truck, she looked through the window and mentioned “Oh, and my son loves animals, so you have to bring Victor back some time. The thought of him seeing a dog bigger than Xerxes is pretty amusing.” As she watched Me Frank head back down the driveway, she stopped to think out loud “I should ask him for advice about adding a green house when I expand the fence. With that, she turned and closed the gate behind her on the way into the house. Stopping in the doorway to her sons room to yawn, she caught sight of him through the mesh wall. Bottom up on the pillow like usual. It was always adorable to see. Not bothering to lower the side this morning, she reached up and popped the middle open, Pausing to check his diaper, the found it to be well used. So without waking him up she shuffled him gently over to the changing table. He just laid there completely limp as she set about changing his diaper. She had to be a quick when his little friend started to stir in his sleep, but she had him in a clean diaper in a minute and back up onto her shoulder. Whispering, she asked “Hey baby, you awake?” The response she got back was just him groaning and somehow she could almost make out the word ‘sleep’ “You know what. I agree.” So with that she went to the living room, paused to open one of the windows with her free hand, and made her way to the couch. Laying back down on the couch and getting the blanket over the two of them with one hand was interesting to say the least. As last she was laying down on the couch with her sleeping little on her chest and belly with a blanket over the two of them. She laid there idly stroking his hair as he slipped back off to dream land. Closing her eyes for a quick nap, she decided that just this once him getting a little extra sleep time in the morning was a nice trade off for extra cuddles. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ John woke up and stretched his arms and legs out in all directions before flopping back onto his pillow. His pillow was particularly warm this morning. And soft. Moving his head side to side, he opened his eyes to realize what he was using as a pillow. Realizing what it was didn’t stop him from flopping his head back onto the breast. But it did make it feel a bit awkward to doze back off. Hearing her heart beat against his right ear helped a lot as he drifted back off for a bit, barely registering that with a large arm over him he couldn’t have slid off or wormed his way out of her snuggle even if he had wanted to. But he did fall asleep to a dream about drinking milk in bed. Which was a bit weird, even for him.

Chapter 19: Not the Same as Me Note: In this chapter, a character uses offensive language about a person with disabilities. This is not an endorsement of that behavior. I shivered as I held the ice pack against my forehead, but I had no one to blame but myself for the situation I found myself in on Saturday morning. This morning, I had again kept up the pretense that the bedwetting pills had given me some annoying headaches. I had gotten out of bed just in time to snag the last of the pancakes that Dad had made for breakfast. From the look on Mom’s face as I entered the kitchen, it was clear that she had already noticed the sheets I had tossed into the washing machine last night. But with Jackson in the room, there wasn’t an opportunity to have a conversation about bedwetting again. I groaned and rubbed my forehead frequently while eating my breakfast. It must have been a stellar acting job because no sooner had I finished breakfast than Dad had come up to me with an ice pack in hand. The good thing was that my parents believed me. The bad thing was that they believed me and had offered me an ice pack to help dull the pain. I had no choice but to accept it, so now I was lying on my back on the couch, painfully watching the seconds pass by. I trembled a little as another shiver ran all the way through my body. A little bit longer, and perhaps I could pretend that I was cured for the time being. Mom had promised to not make me take the pills for more than a few more nights if they continued to prove ineffective. I was going to hold her to it. I didn’t want to have to keep faking a headache every morning. It wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as faking the bedwetting. My phone buzzed. With one hand still holding the ice pack to my forehead, I checked my most recent message. It was from Angie, who was bored out of her mind on the road trip her family was taking out to South Dakota. This morning, her family was at Mouth Rushmore, and she’d taken a selfie to share with Emma and me. I really hoped the vacation my parents had planned for later in the summer was going to have better destinations than that. “Since you’re not feeling well, I moved your sheets over to the dryer,” Mom said as she stepped into the living room. I groaned, this time from the fact that my bedwetting wasn’t exactly being treated like a secret rather than from faking a headache. With Grace fully aware of it, Mom and Dad weren’t showing any reservations about bringing up that topic with me while she was around. “Is your headache still pretty bad?” Mom asked. “Perhaps you should stay home today to rest up rather than going over to Emma’s place?” There was no way I was going to be spending the first day of summer stuck at home. Even with Angie gone, I still had plans to bike across the neighborhood to hang out with Emma for the afternoon. “I’m sure I’ll be feeling better by then,” I insisted. “I think the ice pack is really helping.” “We’ll see how you’re feeling later,” Mom conceded. “I can always drive you over instead.” I re-adjusted the ice pack on my forehead, trying to find a way to hold it in place that wasn’t so cold. All of us were in the living room except Jackson, who was playing with Legos in his bedroom. For the sake of all our feet, those evil bricks were now banned from being anywhere else in the house. After a few more minutes had passed, I set the ice pack down. Hopefully, that recovery time from the headache wasn’t too unbelievable. “There was something else your mom and I were wanting to talk to you girls about.” I looked over at my sister before looking up at Dad. Grace appeared just as confused about what this could mean as me. “Maddy,” Dad said. “Since you are going to be turning thirteen in a week, we’ve decided that you’re going to be able to stay home by yourself this summer.” “Oh, thank goodness,” Grace said. I glared at my sister. “No need to act that excited about it.” I did see where Grace was coming from, though. Having to be home with me had limited some of her opportunities for work and hanging out with her friends during previous summers. “Hey,” Grace said. “I’ve been asking Mom and Dad to let you do it for a while now.” “It’s a lot of responsibility,” Mom said. “And you need to understand that this is a privilege that can be taken away if you aren’t careful with it. There are some rules you need to follow. It’s similar to the rules we had for your sister when she was your age. No having any friends over while we are gone. No using the stove or the oven….” A picture of what those days at home might look like this summer came into focus in my head as Mom continued to go over all the things I’d need to do to be allowed to stay in the house by myself. I had already thought this summer was going to be the best one ever, but this, having the whole house to myself? The implications became immediately clear. With the whole house to myself, I would have so much more freedom to experiment with peeing my pants. What should I try first? I wanted to hold my bladder to the point of bursting before I let it out. I wanted to see what it would be like to wet my pants while sitting down. Maybe I could try peeing myself with different outfits on. “Maddy, Maddy.” Someone was snapping their fingers and saying my name. I blinked rapidly and returned my gaze back to Mom. “Madelyn,” Mom said, “We want to give you more responsibilities, but you need to pay attention.” “Sorry,” I said. I found myself beginning to subconsciously pick on my fingernails. I hoped that my sudden daydreaming hadn’t ruined this new opportunity before it had already begun. Grace laughed. “I bet she was thinking about how to sneak in a boyfriend while I’m gone.” “Eww,” I said. “No. Gross.” “Your sister is right, though,” Dad said. “No friends over when you’re by yourself means no boyfriends as well.” “Or girlfriends,” Mom said. I rolled my eyes. “I don’t have either of those.” “What, you want to grow up to be a crazy cat lady?” Grace asked. I looked over at Chester, who was napping in a sunspot on the carpet in front of the window. “That doesn’t seem like a bad idea.” <><><> I sat on my bed with the fourth Harry Potter book in my hands. I wasn’t as big a fan of the Triwizard Tournament story arc, but I always found the Quidditch World Cup to be fascinating. It would be enough just to have the opportunity to go to a soccer World Cup at some point. If only I could convince my parents to get tickets when the U.S. hosted it in several years. I had already breezed through the previous book earlier this morning after having finally discarded the ice pack. Once the conversation about being allowed to stay home alone this summer had ended, I had retreated up to my bedroom to read. It was too noisy downstairs to concentrate. My eyes flickered back and forth rapidly across the pages. My teachers always told me I read too fast. I didn’t see how that was supposed to be a bad thing. “Maddy. Maddy. Maddy!” My head snapped up as I finally caught wind that someone was calling my name. Mom was standing a few feet away, looking down at me. I hadn’t even heard her knock or open my bedroom door, which should have been enough to get my attention. “Can’t you pick out something else to read?” Mom asked as she looked down at the book in my hands. “There are plenty of other books to choose from in the basement.” That was another reason I had gone off to my bedroom to read. The Harry Potter series was pretty much the only books I’d read over the past two years outside of anything that had been required for school assignments. I hadn’t counted how many times I’d gone through the series, but it had to be a lot. Sometimes, I’d read through the books in order, but other times, I’d jump around to different ones depending on which one I felt like reading at the moment. My parents didn’t have anything against the Harry Potter books. They just were overly insistent that I try to expand my reading interests. None of the other series they’d thrown my way had caught my imagination in the same way, so I usually conducted my Harry Potter reading out of sight as to avoid any criticism. My parents had never explicitly banned me from reading them, but they had very much pressured me to not read them so often. “Your sheets are dry now,” Mom said. “Can you please go grab them from the laundry room? And make sure to fold them neatly and put them back in the closet. I don’t want to come back up and see them tossed in a pile in the corner.” “Can I at least finish this chapter?” “Right away, please,” Mom said. “It’s almost time for lunch.” “Can I at least not take those pills again tonight?” “Let’s just try it for two more nights,” Mom said. “That way, if it hasn’t worked by the time we take you to the doctor, then we can talk with them about what to do next.” I suppressed a sigh as I got off of the bed and headed toward the hallway. “And while you’re down there, don’t forget to clean the litter box,” Mom said, calling out after me as I reached the stairs. “You know you’re supposed to do that in the morning before going off to play.” “Stupid chores,” I muttered to myself. I let my feet fall just a little harder on the stairs as I trudged down the steps on the way to the main floor. We had sadly eaten all the pizza last night, which meant no leftovers for lunch. Instead, Dad was busy in the kitchen, with multiple pots and pans set out on the stovetop. I tried to avoid making eye contact with anyone as I made my way back upstairs with a bundle of laundry in my arms, enduring the walk of shame in silence as I carried the evidence of my presumed bedwetting back up to my bedroom. <><><> “I’ve got good news and bad news,” Emma said as she opened the front door to let me into her house. I had biked over to Emma’s house after lunch, though it had taken some work to convince Mom that my fake headaches had cleared up enough for me to leave the house after all. But she had still made me take a couple of Tylenol pills before I left. Even though Emma’s house was on the opposite side of the neighborhood, it was an easy trek, one that I had made countless times before. “What is it?” I asked. “Do you want the good news or the bad news first?” I thought about that for a second. “Good news.” “The good news is I’m still free to go to the park.” That didn’t make much sense to me. Why would Emma not have been able to go to the park near her house, where we often hung out during the summer? “What’s the bad news?” Emma raised her eyebrows and looked over her shoulder. She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Her.” I took another step into the house and looked over Emma’s shoulder. The girl in the distance bore a slight resemblance to Emma, enough so that I had to guess that they were related in some way. They both had curly brown hair, though the girl's hair was done up in braided pigtails while Emma had left her shoulder-length hair unbraided. But it was how they were dressed that differentiated them. Like me, Emma was wearing soccer shorts and a T-shirt. The girl was wearing long pink and white striped socks that came up to her knees. She had on a plaited, muted-pink skirt and a white shirt with a Hufflepuff emblem in the middle. There was a pink watch on her left hand and a half-dozen colorful bracelets in different styles on her right hand. But what stood out most was the set of earmuffs she was wearing. I settled for that word rather than headphones, because something just looked off about them. The girl hadn’t turned in our way yet. She was facing the other direction, staring off into space. I lowered my voice so the girl wouldn’t hear me. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, despite whatever misgivings Emma seemed to have. “Why is she bad news?” “She’s my cousin, Hannah. Her family has been staying with us for the weekend. She is bad news because I accidentally let her overhear that I was going to go to the park with you, and now she wants to come as well. She threw a tantrum when I told her she couldn’t, and then my mom said I had to let her tag along.” I looked over again at Emma’s cousin before turning back to face Emma. Setting aside the fact that a girl our age throwing a tantrum was a bit strange, I still didn’t get why Emma was concerned. “So?” Emma opened her mouth to respond, but Hannah ran over to greet me before Emma had a chance to say anything further. Emma grimaced as Hannah stood next to her. “Hi!” Hannah said, waving her hand at me. “Um, hi,” I said in return. I noticed that Hannah was looking down at my waist rather than up at my face. “OK,” Emma said after the long silence that followed that awkward introduction. “Hannah, this is my friend Maddy. Maddy, this is my cousin Hannah.” “What happened to your fingernails?” Hannah blurted out. “They look all chewed up.” Were my nails that bad? I hastily pulled my hands up in front of my face. I did have a habit of picking on them absentmindedly, but it was embarrassing to have a stranger call it out so bluntly. “I paint mine so I don’t bite on them,” Hannah said. She thrust her hands out in front of me, showing off nails painted in yellow and black. “I did them in Hufflepuff colors. Have you ever read-” Buzz. Buzz. The screen on a bright pink watch Hannah was wearing around her wrist went off. She paused what she was saying mid-sentence and dashed off around the corner. “Whatever you do, don’t mention that you like Harry Potter,” Emma said as soon as Hannah was out of sight. “Why? I like Harry Potter.” “I’ve had to listen to her yack about it for the past two days non-stop. It’s so annoying. She’s even more of a chatterbox than you. Can’t get her to stop for nothing, so don’t you dare get her started on it again.” “And she can hear us fine with those earmuffs?” “Yeah, as long as you aren’t whispering,” Emma said. “They’re supposed to reduce noise or something since she’s supposedly sensitive to loud sounds.” “What’s the deal with her watch?” “It’s to help remind her to go use the toilet.” “But, like, why would she need to be reminded to do that?” Emma rubbed her face with her hand. “Yeah, I should have warned you. She has autism. She acts like a toddler more than a teenager a lot of the time. You have no idea what I’ve had to deal with since she got here two days ago. I was hoping to get away from that weirdo for the afternoon, but now I’m stuck with her.” I thought through all the details of my brief interaction with Hannah so far. That made sense. Something had felt obviously off about her. “I suppose she is a bit different.” “Oh, that’s not even the worst of it,” Emma said. “She still pees the bed every night. Can you believe that? She’s already thirteen, and her mom has to help her put on a diaper before tucking her into her sleeping bag. And, of course, she has to be sleeping on the floor in my room. I’ve been using a scented odor spray, but my bedroom still smells like piss.” I prayed fervently that I could keep a poker face and not give any hint of what I was thinking. It wasn’t as though I wasn’t aware of the fact that my friends had a poor view of kids our age who wet the bed. In the three years since I had learned about two of my own cousins being bedwetters, I hadn’t ever come across another kid who was a bedwetter. I had practically a million questions, not that I could ask Emma any of them directly. “She really, like, pees in a diaper? That’s so gross,” I said. That only encouraged Emma to continue her rant about her cousin. “Honestly, her parents should probably just make her wear diapers during the day. She pissed herself all over the couch last night when we were watching a movie. It was so gross. She didn’t even really seem to notice. Just sat there with her soaked clothes until my aunt said something about it.” I fidgeted and began picking at my nails again, even though there was hardly much left on the ends of my fingers. Like Hannah, I had also been wetting the bed and peeing my pants during the day. But I was different. I wasn’t some weirdo like her. I had full control over what I was doing. I just did it because it felt good. It wasn’t anything like Hannah did, basically behaving like a toddler who wasn’t fully toilet trained. Hannah came sprinting back around the corner with a smile on her face, nearly running into me as her feet slid on the wood floor. “Are we going to the park now?” she asked Emma. “Yes, we’re going to the park,” Emma said curtly. “Go get your shoes on.” Hannah walked over to the doorway and grabbed a pair of white and teal shoes off of the shoe rack. I noticed that instead of laces, they had Velcro straps. Emma leaned in toward my ear and whispered to me. “I know right, she wears those cause she can’t even tie her shoes properly.” We waited for Hannah to finish getting her shoes on and then followed her out the door. “Aren’t you going to grab your bike from the garage?” I asked Emma once we were in the driveway. “We’re going to walk since there isn’t a bike for Hannah, at least not one with training wheels,” Emma said. Hannah appeared oblivious to our conversation. I was wondering exactly how well those noise-reducing earmuffs worked. She was sitting on her knees in the grass next to the driveway, plucking dandelions. The weeds were still bright yellow, not close to the point where their seeds would be ready to blow away. The park, situated near the center of the neighborhood, was only a couple of blocks down. It was a massive complex. There was a large playground, a splash pad, a sand volleyball court, a couple of baseball diamonds, and, of course, some soccer fields. It would have been nicer to bike over to it, but walking along the sidewalk wasn’t that bad. This part of the neighborhood was fairly quiet, without much through traffic. Emma and I both had our soccer cleats and a soccer ball tucked inside matching drawstring bags on our backs. Emma shifted over to the left side of me, leaving me between her and her cousin. As we walked down the sidewalk, there was a sound coming from Hannah’s direction that brought back an old memory. Could that faint rustling sound be what I thought it was? I didn’t have long to consider it. When the park came into view after turning around the corner, Hannah darted out ahead of us, skipping energetically down the sidewalk with her arms swaying awkwardly out by her sides. Emma put both her hands on her face. “She’s such a fucking retard.” I bit my lip and stared down at my feet as I continued to walk alongside Emma. There had been one time five or six years back when Grace has used that word at me during an argument we had been having. The details of what had led up to that confrontation had been long forgotten, but the aftermath of it was still stuck in my mind. My parents had always been fully opposed to corporal punishment. They’d never once laid a hand on my bottom. As far as I was aware, that was the only time Grace had ever been given a spanking. Her face had been puffy, red, and wet with tears when my parents brought her back to apologize to me afterward. I still remembered how Grace had squirmed uncomfortably on the couch that evening. The message had been crystal clear. And that word had never been heard again in our house. I wouldn’t have ever considered using that word against someone else, no matter how angry I was or what I thought of them. Even years later, when I first discovered a word that rhymes with duck, the only thing my dad had told me was that unless I had just whacked my finger with a hammer or stubbed my toe, that I shouldn’t be using that type of language. As uncomfortable as I was with what Emma had just said, I found myself agreeing with the overall sentiment. I felt uncomfortable around Hannah in a way that I hadn’t felt about anyone else before. I cringed as I watched her prance around in the playground in a way more reminiscent of girls my brother’s age. Something about her rubbed me the wrong way, like a piece of chalk being slowly dragged across a blackboard. “How long is her family staying?” I asked. “Just through the weekend, but it might end up being forever. They are looking for a house in the area. There apparently is a school around here that her parents want to send her to, you know, one for special kids like her,” Emma said, making air quotes around the word “special” with her hands. “Emma, can you push me?” Hannah yelled in the distance. We looked over at the playground. Hannah was sitting stationary on a swing. Emma sighed again. “Better go do it. I’ll hear it from Mom if she finds out that Hannah didn’t have a good time at the park.” I followed Emma over to the swing set, watching as she stepped behind her cousin and took hold of the swing, pulling it back as far as she could before running forward and giving it a big push. Emma sprinted underneath Hannah as she flew in the air and then came to stand next to me. There wasn’t any mistaking it as Hannah flew up on the swing. The wind caught hold of her skirt and lifted it up, revealing that Hannah wasn’t wearing ordinary underwear. My suspicions about the sound I’d heard on our walk over to the park were confirmed. There was a short flash of pastel colors on a material far bulkier than normal underwear. I waited with bated breath as Hannah swung backward and then came up toward me again. This time, my eyes were locked in. When her skirt lifted up in the air again, I caught sight of a pattern I had only previously seen in magazine ads. What Hannah had on beneath her skirt was nothing other than the pull-ups I was so badly wanting for myself. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Chapter 39: Rebellion Little in Love 2 – LittleFallenPrincess I waited patiently as the Speaker of the House slowly managed to regain order in the Commons. The shouting match between the Prime Minister and our own party had eventually returned to just evil glares, whilst the opposition parties across the aisle all laughed at our inability to maintain order within our own ranks. “Now… with everything going on, I think we ought to hear directly from the person leading the protests… Mrs Olivia Clarke.” The Speaker of the House called out. Everyone cheered in agreement, though the Prime Minister didn’t seem all too happy. “It’s your time… make it count…” Jacob whispered to me as he moved out of the way so I could make my way to the front bench. With amazons towering over me on both sides, I couldn’t help feeling a bit of fear and anxiety as I passed my peers, all of whom looked at me with different emotions on their faces. Some were proud of me, nodding and smiling, including Mrs Carter, who still shocked me that she was a supporter of littles. I swear I remember hearing Jacob talk about her having her own little that she adopted, hence why I didn’t bother looking to her for support, or even friendship… which reminded me that maybe I should have a look into her and see what situation she’s actually in. Because maybe she’s like Catherine, Ellie and Danny’s Mummy… maybe she’s protecting the little. Maybe… just maybe… I was a little too quick to judge. I walked up to the large table in front of the Prime Minister and his ministers, the one separating our party from the opposition. This is where the PM and the leader of the opposition would speak out, along with their cabinet ministers, whereas backbenchers like me would have to speak from our seats. At least now I’d have a microphone so they'd be able to hear me! Downside was… I didn’t see a step stool or anything, which meant either awkwardly asking for one, or climbing on top of the table, which seemed… undignified. “Let’s see her try to get up…” The Prime Minister smirked as he whispered to the Secretary of State next to him. I say he ‘whispered’… he made sure he was loud enough so that I could hear him. But then that’s when the unexpected happened. The Minister for Equalities… whose job it was to carefully oversee equality legislation and encourage fair treatment for all, basically any minority except littles… stood up from the front bench and grabbed something from under his seat, walking ahead of me and placing it down next to the stand. It was… a step stool! “I… thank you…” I said, mumbling my words as I struggled to find the appreciation for such a kind act. One that I genuinely wasn’t expecting. “No, Mrs Clarke, thank you.” He replied, smiling at me. I could feel the hatred from the Prime Minister burning into the back of this relatively unknown Minister’s head. He had clearly gone against orders and directly disobeyed our Prime Minister, something that will probably lead to him getting the whip withdrawn. But that’s the thing… this wasn’t a last minute attempt to save face in front of the majority of our party who seemed to be on our side rather than the PM’s… this guy had the foresight to bring this ahead of time… I smiled at the Equalities Minister and made my way up the step stool so that I was now at head height with the microphone. “I…” I coughed a bit to clear my throat… and to build up the nerves I needed to speak to everyone. Last time I did this, it landed me in hot water with the Prime Minister, and I was fueled by fury and rage last time. This time… I needed to sound civil. I needed to be the better person. I needed… to appear like an adult and not the little baby that most of these people probably saw me as. “I… thank you, Mr Speaker. I… I understand a lot of you are worried right now. The protests have been going on for…” “BECAUSE OF YOU! YOU’RE THE ONE WHO STARTED THEM!” An opposition member shouted, interrupting me. “ORDER!” The Speaker called out. “Yes, I am.” I replied, calmly. “My wife was attacked and left in a coma, so I lashed out at the person who caused it, and due to that outburst… a certain member of my party then tried adopting me.” All eyes turned to the perpetrator, who quickly hid her face in her notes, trying to look less guilty. “Tell me, any of you, would you have acted differently in that moment? Your wife is in a coma, and you find out one of the people you truly trusted… had put her there… that he betrayed everything you thought he stood for…” I heard a few shouts of agreement coming from various parts of the Commons, whereas the people who kept quiet looked very guilty. “I went for the person who betrayed myself and my wife. And I ended up nearly being adopted for doing so. If the public hadn’t helped me… I’d be stuck in a nursery in Mrs Brackenstone’s house, shitting myself…” “Language warning, Mrs Clarke…” The Speaker interrupted. “Sorry, Mr Speaker. But I would be regressed in a crib somewhere, unable to do the job I was elected to do. I’m sorry, but who won us the election? And I’m not talking about myself… I’m talking about the millions of littles who all voted, most of whom for the first time, to get us into power. And they, along with millions of Amazon supporters… have shown us that our party failed them. That our Prime Minister turned his back on those who he should be protecting. We voted for you because you wanted to make the country more fair for littles, but you ended up working closely with Chris Slater…” The Commons erupted into arguments again, which had to be quashed by the Speaker… yet again. “It’s true, isn’t it? You and the head of LIBRA were working closely together. I found out just how close during my time running LIBRA myself…” The Prime Minister’s face turned pale as he realised he was fucked. Funny thing is… I found nothing. It was one of the first things I did when I took over running LIBRA, but I couldn’t find anything linking Chris to the PM. No emails, no calls… nothing. But the pale shade on this man’s face told me everything I needed to know. What had just started as a hunch… had just been confirmed by this traitorous face. “I…” He said, speechless. “So you admit you had dealings with Chris?” I asked. “Yes. In order to improve things for littles across the country…” The Prime Minister responded, lying through his teeth. “Improve things… like… developing Brute Force hypnosis to completely obliterate any little’s mind?” “How did…?” His face dropped in fear. “How did I know? I have a very clever ally who is a bit of an expert in all things tech. She confirmed that the same device used to hypnotise my wife… is the same device that created the brute force hypnosis recordings that is currently being used on littles across the country. “That… that isn’t illegal…” “No, you’re right, it’s not. You vowed to outlaw all forced hypnosis before we got elected. And then as soon as you get your position… you go ahead and create the worst kind imaginable… one that leaves absolutely nothing of the original person left. And not only that… that same device that created it can also be used on Amazons. Imagine that kind of power being used against any of you here today. Being turned into something you’re not. Being reduced to a babbling baby just by accidentally watching the wrong TV show.” I looked around the room, and I could see all of them panic a little inside at the thought of this possibility. For so long they thought themselves so powerful… so… invulnerable… and now they were just as powerless and helpless as the littles they love to adopt. “WHERE IS THIS DEVICE NOW?” The leader of the opposition shouted in a panic. The speaker didn’t tell him off or anything, as I could see that even he was nervously twitching in his seat at the thought of being hypnotised. “I had it dismantled. And all records and copies destroyed. Because I believe that such a device is not safe in anyone’s hands. Amazon or little. It’s why the betrayal of the Prime Minister… after everything he promised… hurts so much.” “So he orchestrated the attack on Mrs Williams?” Mrs Carter stood up and asked. The house erupted into yelling matches again as everyone put two and two together and realised that whilst it was not illegal to use hypnosis on a little… it was definitely assault when it comes to an Amazon. And for the Prime Minister to be in league with Chris when this was going on… “I CALL FOR A VOTE OF NO CONFIDENCE IN OUR PRIME MINISTER!” Mrs Carter cried out, above everyone else’s voices. There. That was what I was waiting for. If I had called for it myself… there was no chance I’d even be listened to. I just had to drip feed the information to my party, let them realise what the Prime Minister had actually done… and wait for the ensuing chaos. Waves of hands raised in support, all shouting ‘Aye’. --------------------------------------------------------- “THE AYES HAVE IT, THE AYES HAVE IT.” The speaker announced after a very long, tense vote. I watched as the disgraced Prime Minister was voted out of office, and subsequently arrested for his role in the assault on my wife. And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t find great enjoyment in seeing his usually-smug face look at me with a mix of hatred and guilt as he was paraded out of here with his hands cuffed behind his back by a couple of police officers. He’s lucky I had Faith dismantle that device… otherwise he’d be drooling in a crib somewhere for what he did to my wife. The majority of our party had voted to oust that backstabbing prick, the only people who didn’t were the small handful of the Prime Minister’s cabinet members. Not only did most of our party vote to get rid of him, most of the other political parties did too, and this just left a hole in the leadership position of not only our party… but our government. Which was made all the more scary by the fact that the country really needed stability right now. It needed reassurance, so that the protests would calm down and things would go back to something more peaceful. Not the same, as we can’t go back to the status quo, not after everything we’ve been through, but we definitely need some semblance of peace. Once the large doors shut, the Commons went eerily silent, which after today’s shouting matches… was just uncomfortable. “What do we do now?” Mrs Carter asked, finally breaking the silence. “Who becomes Prime Minister now?” Everyone looked around at each other and shrugged. Clearly no one had any idea. “We don’t really have any kind of succession like other countries. This… this has never happened before.” The Speaker calmly spoke out to all the MPs currently sitting in their bench seats, waiting to be told what happens next now that the corrupt PM is gone. “The Green Democrats need to elect a new leader, and that person will take on the position of interim Prime Minister, until the time in which the people can elect a new Prime Minister.” “So… it’s up to us?” Mrs Carter looked around. “I nominate Mrs Clarke.” My heart stopped. At least that’s what it felt like when everyone turned to look at me. I had quietly taken my seat to cast my vote when the Prime Minister’s fate was up for debate… and now I wanted to retreat further into the chair, away from all these prying eyes. “I agree.” Jacob said. “I would suggest going away and voting…” The Speaker tried to suggest. “No. We’re confident. We nominate Mrs Clarke.” “This is highly unprecedented… but then everything going on lately is. The country is in chaos. We need leadership. Mrs Clarke… do you accept this nomination?” The Speaker of the Commons turned to ask me. “I…” “Well?” “Liv… do it! Say yes!” Dotty said into my earpiece, followed by Faith, who was also in on the call, suggesting I should definitely do it. “I…” ======================================================= My new story just had it's second chapter on SubscribeStar, so expect it here in a couple of weeks (at least that's the current plan). Also thinking of opening up short story commissions now too finally, now that my writers block seems to have subsided. If you haven't seen, I'm now up and running on Subscribestar! (Sorry for the reminder again, trying to get my subscribers back after the Patreon rubbish!) ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my patrons for their support over the past couple of years! Seriously, your support meant the world to me, and I hope to be set up somewhere new soon. New chapters of Little in Love 2 every Wednesday/Sunday! Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post! Thanks!

This will be the final chapter of the catchup of my over-writing frenzy. Hope y’all enjoy, chapter 26 and on will be Bethany and Ashley’s evening escapades, started writing 26 but it will be a minute, have a big event this weekend that is going to have me distracted but I hope to have more for you in the coming week. Chapter 25 Elizabeth was disconnected from the table and lifted down to her feet to stand next to Sharlese. It was her first time unrestrained and on both feet in her time so far that she was actually able to take in and fully compare herself. Elizabeth and Bethany were considered tall amongst amazons but Elizabeth found herself at best at eye level with Sharlese’s chest. Sharlese was truly a giantess, an extremely rare genetic variant of the Amazon genome, much more common than Ashley’s particular makeup but fairly uncommon. Even Max would have to look upwards a bit at Miss Sharlese which had Elizabeth in throws of awe and submission. She was so used to using her Amazon size to its advantages to overpower and overcome any and all problems but standing next to Sharlese she felt tiny. Both because she was shorter and because sharlese’s build was at least one and a half Elizabeth’s wide. “Come along.” Sharlese beckoned with a finger as she approached a secondary door inside of the nursery that Elizabeth had been curious about. Sharlese opened the door into an en-suite bathroom. There was a walk-in closet immediately inside the door on the right. Elizabeth peeked in and could see hangers loaded down with short dresses, long dresses, ridiculously puffy dresses, onesies, arrays of strappy leather items, a stockpile of diapers amongst the shelves in different variations and colour schemes. There were two black cabinets with the same locks as the crib and wardrobe, they were a little ominous with black roses, the stems covered in thorns, carved into the doors. There was another door at the end of the bathroom past the closet, it had a padlock running through a cast iron hinge sealing the door. Sharlese took note of her gaze and commented. “That is the water closet, you will be given limited access to the potty when you are a good girl as a reward.” Elizabeth noted that, clearly she would not be getting access at this point in time, she had noticed a bit of building pressure in her bladder and a toilet sounded nice after the constant string of diapers she had been in. Across from the closets was the shower and independent bathtub, both appeared to be extremely high end with extra nozzles and jets protruding from the surfaces of black granite with brass fittings. Sharlese opened the glass door of the shower for Elizabeth to step in. “You will need to be rinsed before your bath.” Sharlese followed her in which Elizabeth found a little odd then started pulling cables from the walls and floors to attach to the cuffs that were still on from the change. A button was pushed and the cable slack was snapped up before she heard the faint sound of electric motors behind the wall pulling her. She only resisted for a moment but they proved to be unyielding. She realised she was headed towards the position Bethany had put her in the previous morning, was she really going to be starting this morning with an enema too? The motors stopped when her palms were against the wall and her feet were spread to the outer edges of the shower which was a much wider split than she had done the previous morning. Sharlese pulled a plastic cap over Elizabeth’s hair and made sure it was all tucked in before a blindfold was pulled over her eyes. Elizabeth was left for only a brief moment before she felt something against her lips, it felt like the pacifier bulb which her body couldn’t resist for some reason. She regretted the decision when straps were pulled around her head and secured. “Since you refused your morning bottle, we will double it for your shower.” Sharlese said as a tube was connected to the front of the pacifier and a valve turned which let the sweet formula flow into Elizabeth’s mouth. She felt some shocks in her tongue and recognized she had just been fitted with a trainer pacifier to encourage her to suck down the formula. Some of the fullness had subsided at this point but a double serving of the massive bottle she had seen would surely pop her. Sharlese seemed to have stepped out of the shower but only for a moment before she felt something probing her back door. She let out a little yelp as something slid in and she could hear the sound of a pressure cuff pump bulb being squeezed. The object inside her expanded little by little until it became almost uncomfortable and she let out a little yelp. Sharlese gave the bulb two more pumps for good measure and dropped it, letting it swing between Elizabeth’s legs. The sound of the sliding glass door could be heard before she heard the hiss of steam being pumped into the enclosure as the coolness subsided and was replaced with the warm embrace of thick humid air. She heard the rush of water after a few minutes and felt multiple streams hit her body all at once from several directions. Finally what she dreaded most, the plug in her began to introduce warm water into her bowels. It seemed to be an automated enema as it would only pump in a small amount of water and then quickly evacuate it before adding a fresh supply. Each time it made a cycle it would increase the amount by a low percentage. This treatment went on for 15 minutes and Elizabeth couldn’t say she hated it. The water was warm and relaxing and honestly the enema felt refreshing. The thing she didn’t like was the constant stream of formula filling her mouth and the bloated tummy feeling she was getting from it. Her tummy was bulging out from the large serving of oatmeal and the heavy formula sloshing around inside her. It took away some of her physique and gave her the appearance of baby fat. Finally the water shut down and a flow of hot air was pushed through the shower to dry her skin. Sharlese must have stepped into the shower because she felt her pacifier being pulled away and her restraints being released, the blindfold leading the shower cap before she was helped out of the shower. Sharlese guided her to the tub where she stepped into the warm bubble bath that had been prepared. It smelled of flowers, not as sweet as something she’d use on a little but very fragrant. The nanny gently scrubbed Elizabeth’s skin with a soft loofah until she was practically glistening. Aside from the forced feeding and enema, Elizabeth imagined this must be how queens live, waited on and bathed by someone else. She’d gladly accept that bit of humiliation for this sort of treatment. Her hair was brushed before Sharlese used a cup to scoop water from the bath and gently pour water over her head. She used her hand on the girl's forehead to shield her eyes from the water as she wet her hair down. Shampoo was gently massaged into her scalp followed by a rinse and a second shampooing and rinse. Finally oils and conditioners were applied that had her black hair practically mirror-like and shiny beyond any regimen she had ever come up with. She was in such bliss that the growing pressure in her bladder and over-full feeling in her stomach seemed to flow down the drain with the spent water after Sharlese pulled the plug. She was helped out of the tub and stood on a mat while Sharlese dried her off with the softest, fluffiest towel she had ever felt. She really, really, really could get very used to this. She was guided out of the bathroom and back to the changing table. She knew she was coming to the end of her stay here and would have to return home in a diaper to avoid the wrath of the LCU and Bethany. Sharlese gave her a little lift onto the changing table, not that she needed any help, and pulled a strap across her chest, covering her nipples and giving her a bit of modesty. A diaper was pulled from under the table and unfolded before being slid under Elizabeth with her legs lifted by her ankles before being lowered back down onto the padding. “Master Guildroy has been in contact with Miss Bethany to let her know your whereabouts and safety and guarantee her that you will be promptly returned home in the conditions mandated by your commands. He also recommended that I ensure your journey home be memorable and enjoyable.” With that comment, Elizabeth felt Sharlese slide the large, well lubricated diaper trainer between her legs. She was immediately greeted with locking confirmation vibrations and pleasant fullness that elicited a soft moan and a flood of excited memories. She was quickly powdered and the diaper sealed. It was a similar diaper to the one that Elizabeth had sent with her in her purse but seemed a bit thinner. She was then released from the table and stood in the centre of the nursery. A tight bra was pulled over her head, sports bra esque but designed more so to look like a training bra. It was simple black with purple roses covering the fabric and it held Elizabeth’s large chest tight and removed any sort of bounce she may have had in a normal bra. Next was a dark purple onesie with a black lace Peter Pan collar and lace cuffs around her bicep and thigh. It would be pretty cute on its own but Elizabeth hoped she’d get a bit more than just a onesie. Around the waist was a stiff band of canvas that acted as a belt and the Amazon curves of her hips guaranteed that when Sharlese pulled it tight, it would be locked in place. An integrated strap that started at her belly button, connected to the belt, was pulled up between her legs and tightened. It held the soft padding of the diaper against her skin and sank in the trainer so that it didn’t have any chances of moving. The strap was wide between her thighs and despite being in a thinner diaper, the tightness of the padding bowed her thigh apart a little and she’d have to be conscious of the waddle it would generate. The pain in Elizabeth’s bladder reared its ugly head. Now that her diaper was covered by the onesie she couldn’t help but be tempted to relieve some of that pressure, especially with the trainer. She didn’t want to soak the diaper completely and have to ride home in a wet diaper especially when she didn’t know how long the ride would be. The Nanny held up the next article to be added to her ensemble, a pair of black short dungarees. The shoulder straps had some very mild frills same with the leg holes and the front panel had Max’s crest embroidered into the left breast in all black thread. As Elizabeth lifted her leg to step in she very carefully opened up her bladder to let a small trickle into the waiting diaper. The trainer kicked to life on a low hum and carried through until she clamped back down. She wasn’t expecting the trainer to chirp loudly from inside of her diaper, causing her to turn red as Sharlese looked up with a knowing expression from her squatted position holding the dungarees open for her to step into. “You must have a bit of experience with the trainer.” Sharlese smirked seeing Elizabeth’s flushed face. “It is very tempting to play with isn’t it. If you’re not careful, you’ll be begging for diapers in no time.” Elizabeth wasn’t sure she’d be begging necessarily to be in diapers but the thoughts of the previous orgasms she had with the trainer excited her and deep down she knew it already had a hold on her despite the fact that she had to wet a diaper to use it properly. The dungarees were lifted and pulled over Elizabeth’s hips before Sharlese stepped behind her and pulled the straps over her shoulders and snapped them behind her back in the unreachable spot between her shoulder blades with a very audible click. Elizabeth knew immediately that the click was a locking mechanism and that she was now trapped in the shortalls. “A driver has already left an envelope with the key at your sister’s apartment for you. She was guided over to a vanity mirror where she could take in the look. It was cute, not too childish but also not fully adult. The onesie just looked like an adult singlet she’d wear to have the tight tucked look. Her breasts were still noticeable but dramatically reduced by the tight bra. The legs of the dungarees were short and tight and hugged her thighs a little lower than her favourite pair of short shorts she wore on the weekend to taunt her little charges with adult clothing. The diaper underneath would only be noticeable from its soft rustle as she moved around but it wasn’t immediately visually apparent. She was sat in the chair of the vanity and Sharlese went about blow drying and styling her hair into a complicated Viking braid that started from the perimeter of her face with a smaller braids on either side of her head that ran back over her shoulder and a large braid from the top centre and back. Her bangs were combed out and curled over her forehead in a thin curtain that landed just above her eyebrows. Again it was very cute but somewhere in between the childish and adult aesthetic. Sharlese used a small micro razor and some tweezers to finely tune her eyebrows just a little into a thinner shape and went about applying makeup. Elizabeth didn’t know why she was getting such a treatment for just returning home but again, the luxury of being cared for and primped and preened felt nice. The pain in her bladder was back again and she decided to release just a bit more while she sat in the chair as Sharlese worked on her. The trainer kicked up the level and she had to stifle a gasp as it fired up to her release. She had to remind herself after regaining composure to stem the flow lest she soak the diaper too early. Again the trainer chirped and Sharlese gave her a little smile in the mirror as she drew on some wings from the corner of her eyes. A very light blush was added and quick sealing powder finished the job. She looked like a porcelain doll when Sharlese was done. Next were socks and shoes. Some black thigh highs with purple lace around her thigh squeezed the little bit of pudge over the elastic band and the ensemble was completed with a pair of purple Velcro trainers with a black sole that completed the outfit. “We are a bit behind schedule so if you will follow me down to the car we can leave promptly.” Sharlese said as she held out a hand for Elizabeth. Elizabeth gingerly pinched the nanny’s fingers and was led out of the nursery and downstairs to the courtyard she had walked across dressless the previous night. Outside was one of the large black SUV’s she had seen in the garage the previous night. A tweener gentleman stood by the rear passenger door and opened it for Elizabeth as the pair approached. Sharlese gave a quick ‘thank you’ then looked at Elizabeth who did the same shortly after realizing she needed to use her manners. Elizabeth was not fully prepared for what she saw behind the door of the SUV. The seat that was available to her was a large car seat. Part of the rear row of seats had been removed to make room for the Amazon sized carrier permanently affixed inside the cabin. An automatic step folded down and Elizabeth was guided to the door and up the step before Sharlese’s hands took her hips and guided her down into the seat. The series of straps that bound her to the seat were intense. One across her hips, below and above her breasts, one over each thigh, cuffs on both calves and ankles, wrists bound to the sides of the bumpers that came up to hug her hips along with straps over her biceps and one well padded wide strap around her neck. Blinder wings came around either side of her head which meant she wouldn’t be able to see out either window on either side and the SUV was built limousine style with a wall dividing the driver from the passengers with a wide blacked out window in the centre. The final strap was a crotch strap that Elizabeth knew was included because what car seat is complete without one. Sharlese gave it an extra tug which gained a gasp from Elizabeth as she felt it push down on her fun button and immediately understood why little’s like their crotch straps so tight in the car. Sharlese closed her door and startled Elizabeth a little when she entered the cab in the seat next to her from the other side. She leaned forward and pushed a small button on a built-in screen in front of the restrained girl and shut the car door. A moment later she felt the engine startup as the monitor in front of her booted up some little tv show. She didn’t really pay attention at first then boredom set in and she began watching more and more intently. It was kind of silly and the built in adult sub contexts and innuendo that would be over the heads of a little were quite funny. She found herself forgetting about the pressure in her bladder as the car moved down the road. So much so that when the episode ended and the screen popped up a display of Max’s face she startled a little and lost her grip and let out a longer than previous streams which fired the trainer up at a new level before she managed to get herself under control. “How’s my little Fox this morning?” Max asked and Elizabeth realised it was a video call and he had surely heard the chirp of the trainer. She turned red and looked down as far as the car seat would allow her head to tilt in embarrassment. “I’m very good.” Elizabeth replied after getting her breathing under control. “How was Miss Sharlese? I’m sorry I couldn’t be there this morning. Next time Daddy will be there to help out, I promise.” He said with a knowing smirk. “She is quite wonderful, very adept. Maybe I’d be as good a nanny as her if I had that much experience.” Elizabeth said a little excitedly. As she heard Miss Sharlese clear her throat next to her which made her blush. “That’s good to hear. I had a wonderful evening with you and would like to see you again. I’m going to be a bit busy for a couple of days and was hoping we could schedule another date.” Max said. Elizabeth blushed crimson at the flattery and tried to hide her face again. “I’d like that.” She practically whispered back. “But I need to talk to Bethany first and make sure it’s okay.” She spoke up a bit. “I’ve already spoken to her this morning and she said as long as you want to come out, you’re allowed to. So long as you’re a good girl at home though.” Max said, causing Elizabeth to blush at being treated like a little being picked up for a playdate. “Now, I believe I caught you in the middle of something. I have the trainer set to step up the vibration levels with every wetting. Sharlese has told me that you had two accidents already this morning with trainer and that would mean that was your third. The fourth will be at maximum power but if you just trickle like you have been I doubt it will do much for you. And if you have a full release after the fourth, it will only punish you for holding it. I suggest your next accident finishes the job but you may know better than Daddy and might need to learn a lesson.” Max explained. Elizabeth knew that realistically the third hadn’t really relieved enough pressure and her bladder was aching. Along with the thoughts of the sweet orgasmic release she’d get if she fully let go it was very tempting. “Do you want to have your accident away from daddy? Somewhere a bit more private like the elevator at the apartment, granted you may be stuck in the elevator with someone which could be hard to explain. I could also torment you, set the schedule for the vibrator to start delivering punishment shocks as soon as you step out of the car. Lots of fun options to choose from. I’ve asked the driver to drive very slowly and carefully because of the precious cargo in the back seat. The drive may take over an hour to get you back.” Max explained. He was devious and his dominant takes of control from Elizabeth had her in throws of submission. “Sharlese, could you be a doll and give Little Lizzie her pacifier.” Max asked as Sharlese pulled out a purple pacifier and slid it into Elizabeth’s mouth without a moment of hesitation. “I’ll let you get back to your cartoons but I will be keeping an eye on you with the cameras as I have been this whole time.” Max said which made Elizabeth’s eyes open wide in disbelief. “Yes, sweetie, I have the whole mansion covered in cameras and especially the nursery. I watched quite a bit of your morning while the boring old heads ran circles around each other in my meeting. I will say you look absolutely precious and I hope you enjoy your gifts. Enjoy your ride and listen to your nanny.” Max said before his camera cut away and the cartoons flipped back on. Elizabeth was a little nervous to act right away. Her bladder was begging for the release and her libido kept taunting her with horny thoughts of the intense orgasm she’d get for wetting. But she kept trying to push down those thoughts as she knew Max was watching and Sharlese was right next to her. Her mind justified that she had her first experience with the trainer right in front of her older sister and littles constantly were being watched as they wet themselves and made stickies in their nappies. She decided to focus back on the cartoons to distract her mind and that did an excellent job. She made it another ten minutes into the car ride before she suddenly started feeling wet between the legs. In fact she had released her bladder without noticing at all and her first instinct was to clench back down but she refrained when she felt the powerful max level trainer fire up. She couldn’t stop herself now even if she wanted to, it felt so good to wet her diaper. Her breathing accelerated through her nose and she closed her eyes as the waves of pleasure washed over her while she nursed the pacifier for comfort. She was in her own little world as she soaked herself and the trainer praised her for wetting. It praised her so well that she came twice before she was finished and lay limp in the restraints of the car seat. “Good girl little Lizzie, good girl.” Sharlese praised her as she came into view and gently patted Elizabeth’s brow with a small pink handkerchief. Elizabeth blushed as she realised she had just put on a show for both Max and Sharlese. A small text box popped into the corner of the monitor in front of Elizabeth with the praise “good girl, my little fox,” the sender information only read Daddy and Elizabeth would have passed out from blush overload at the praise from Max as she gave the pacifier a few involuntary suckles. Now that her diaper was wet and she was more sensitive from the orgasms, the crotch strap really began to do a number on her. Each little bump felt like a hill and she had all these tingly sensations in her tummy. The squish of the fully soaked and warm diaper added a strange sensation. She knew she was sensitive from her orgasms and the added moisture from her accident made her feel like she was excessively horny wet in her diaper. It was an interesting feeling and the crotch strap kept making itself apparent as she involuntarily tried to start grinding her wet padding into the strap. She tried to keep the moans low and act like she was watching the cartoons in front of her as she suckled the pacifier. “Is the strap too tight sweetie?” Sharlese’s question came out of nowhere and broke her train of thought as she froze. Elizabeth shook her head ‘no’ and blushed. A bump in the road caused her to groan into the pacifier as the strap dug into the diaper with a dip. Sharlese’s hand came to the strap and gently cupped Elizabeth’s soaked padding through her shortalls. “I can loosen it for you if it’s making you uncomfortable.” Elizabeth could hear the smirk in her voice, she’d do the same thing to littles in the car when shapperoning them around. Elizabeth tried to hold herself back but found her head shaking ‘no’ almost immediately in response. She blushed thinking about how far she had fallen, she was desperately horny, something about this submissive side of herself had her constantly on edge and the humiliating attention was almost too much. “Suit yourself little fox.” Sharlese said as she pulled away to sit back in her seat. Elizabeth went back to watching the cartoons and very carefully tried to grind into the strap undetected, completely forgetting there was a camera pointed right at her with Max more than likely watching on the other end. Then she had a thought, if she wet just a little more, maybe the trainer would stir her a little more while she ground on the strap, she figured she was pretty empty after letting go previously but tried to relax her muscles and let out some more flow. To her surprise, she felt the padding get warmer again and the trainer started up on the lowest setting again. With the strap of the car seat aiding she was able to bring herself to the edge again and pushed forward with all she had into the strap to bring herself over. She crumpled back into the car seat again as the trainer chirped to let everyone know what she had just done. “Best be careful little fox, I didn’t put you in a thick diaper and you’re probably already coming close to capacity. If I had known you were such a heavy daytime wetter as you were at nighttime I would have chosen more noticeable padding. I’d hate for you to leak and spoil your nice clothes, if we need to pull over at a rest stop to change you just let me know.” Sharlese said which caused Elizabeth’s cheeks to burn anew at the thoughts of being changed in public and the humiliation of leaking through a diaper. Luckily there wasn’t much of the journey left and Elizabeth was feeling content so the tight strap between her legs only kept the embers of her arousal at a low warmth so she didn’t feel the need to act as desperately. There was a familiar turn and bump as they pulled into the apartment’s underground garage and she felt the SUV come to a halt. She heard Sharlese’s seat belt unbuckle and her door open, a moment later Elizabeth’s door swung open and Sharlese reached in to start undoing the restraints. Elizabeth was helped out of the car and stretched a little when she got on her own feet. Sharlese had a black and purple bag slung over her shoulder that matched Elizabeth’s current aesthetic. As she looked at the bag it became apparent that it was a diaper bag and the colour scheme matching her own outfit would only mean one thing to others. Her legs were a little wobbly and Sharlese took her arm to help support her. “You might have played a little too much in the car sweetie, we’ll have to be careful with the next ride.” She said before she pulled the pacifier from Elizabeth’s lips and deposited it in her side pocket. Elizabeth had completely forgotten about the pacifier until Sharlese’s finger had hooked into the ring and pulled it from her mouth. “Now, do you know how to get back home from here?” Sharlese asked, looking down at Elizabeth who seemed to shrink a little with the nanny’s gaze. She nodded her head ‘yes’ bashfully. “Then lead the way, I need to have a word with your big sister and drop off your personal effects.” Elizabeth was a little stunned that she had to escort the nanny back to her sister’s apartment but looked up with determination and stepped forward. The soggy padding between her legs was cooling a bit and the added mass of her multiple wettings, big and small, made her unknowingly waddle a bit to keep the damp padding away from her skin. Sharlese watched from behind as her hips swayed and her slightly wider gate gave away the diaper to anyone who was keen, which for the most part was anyone who had ever seen a diapered little. The parking garage was empty and only one couple coming out of the second elevator caught a glimpse of Elizabeth who darted into their open elevator as soon as the doors opened. Sharlese pushed the floor button for the elevator, she knew where she was going all along but part of the mind games when working with a little or submissive was letting them have some control and charge. Elizabeth hadn’t even noticed that Sharlese had pushed the right button for the elevator as she leaned against the wall, staring at the floor with rosey cheeks. She’d realise later that she had been played once she got over the embarrassment of almost being seen but in the moment she was buried in her own thoughts in her head. The elevator rose and the doors opened, Sharlese “tsked” a little under her breath, hoping to have some other resident join them for the elevator ride to see the adorable blush of Elizabeth. Alas, they departed the elevator and Elizabeth made a speedy exit and moved down the hallway to Bethany’s door. “I’ll have to get you a harness and leash for next time if you’re going to take off without your nanny like that little Lizzie.” Sharlese quietly said as she caught up with Elizabeth. Sharlese knocked on the door for Elizabeth who was a blushing mess holding her dungaree’s straps tightly from the comment. Each time Sharlese made a move to embarrass her she seemed to regress a little bit further. ‘She is quite the catch Master Guildroy’ Sharlese thought to herself before the door opened.

Hey everyone! Blasted small emergencies and last-minute events I couldn’t get out of cropped up and delayed me releasing this chapter last night. I’m hoping things will be a little more settled and I can just start popping these off daily, as it actually is pretty fun to write. As a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 3: Smash and Spank and a Surprise My best laid plans actually succeeded for once in this dimension, and in no time flat, everyone at the foster home was informed that I was going to be leaving to live with Nancy by the end of the week. Mrs. Tatum and the Littles were of course devastated, and while I wanted to tell them the truth about why, Kathy’s looming presence deterred me significantly. Unfortunately, Kathy only doubled down on her efforts to humiliate me in my time left, and I almost wet my training panties one day after she held me back from using the potty to finish coloring her a picture. In the end though, Nancy swung by the next day and rescued me back to her own home. Like so many others around here, the home was massive by my standards but according to Nancy, it was just a ‘decently sized place.’ She could have afforded something larger, but she preferred to use her money wisely and she said she didn’t need much. She hinted at that possibly changing, but I was so enamored with my new room free from Kathy that I didn’t really pay that much attention to what she was saying in that particular instance. So, the next week rolled on and I was enrolled in the local daycare for when Nancy was at work. It was actually a pretty interesting place at first and I had been assigned to the Canopy room while I was staying there. To me, it felt like some novelty party room themed to the jungle or the tops of trees, but it was at least pleasant enough to get me through the day. To my chagrin, it meant that I was placed with some already regressed Littles though, but I soon found the book nook in the room and was happy to just sit back and do some reading. Back at home though, things were even better. Living with Nancy, despite the fact that we were a Little and Big living together, she almost went out of her way to accommodate me almost like I was just her roommate. I guess I essentially was, but both of us always kept in mind that sort of boundary ceased to exist beyond the four walls and when the new LPS agent came to inspect the house at the start of my second week here. “Okay, let’s see… training panties, child-proof locks and safety covers over outlets, no choking hazards, nothing sharp or toxic if ingested…” Nancy was running down the list of things she knew the agent was going to check for and that could be a problem that would result in her paying a fine most likely and me being sent back to the foster home. I still wasn’t a big fan of wearing training panties still, but Nancy had demonstrated two things to me since I had arrived here that made me at least tolerate them better than I had before. First, normal underwear my size was rare and half the pairs we found, we discovered actually had regression properties of some kind laced within the fabric, so the risk was just too great to chance it. Second, and more important though, due to the society’s notorious traps for regressing Littles and laws stipulating wet pants without protection could lead to severe punishment, training panties at least offered somewhat of an out… just in case. So, wanting to contribute a little today, I did my own part and made sure that I was in a calm state of mind to answer the questions I knew were coming from the LPS agent. I had even tidied up my room and ensured with Nancy that my sheets reflected a more juvenile style than I might have been used to. We had selected them together, and despite the fact that princess motifs on the bedspread weren’t ideal, I knew it could be much worse. Then, Nancy and I froze as we heard the doorbell ring. Nancy breathed in and exhaled loudly. “Okay, Emily. Just take one step at a time and don’t panic. Just as we rehearsed, okay?” I nodded silently and braced for the agent’s entrance myself. Nancy and I had been worried about our little balancing scheme between me keeping my freedom within the house and being a Little outside of it. Today, those two worlds would be colliding, but I knew that if we were able to pass this inspection, things would be much smoother in the future. Nancy then opened the door with all her might and sported a wide, friendly smile. “Hello there! Come on in!” The monochromatically dressed agent walked in and her eyes immediately began to dart around the room. She then pulled out her badge and flipped it open so we could see the shiny ID and metal badge within. “Agent Vanessa Dawson. LPS. I’m here to conduct a Little and caregiver inspection today. Do you consent to my search of your house?” I swear she must have had Botox or something because her whole face, beyond her mouth hadn’t moved so much as an inch in that entire time she was talking. Nancy, likely sensing the seriousness of the new agent, nodded resolutely. “I consent.” The agent nodded back herself and popped open her tablet to a page where Nancy would need to sign. After she did, it was then my turn and I handed the heavy tablet back to Agent Dawson with Nancy’s help once I scrawled my own signature at the bottom of the form. Agent Dawson reviewed the file and looked over it carefully before moving her screen to a different page. She then stared back up with her still undiscerning face. “Now that’s all settled, I will begin my investigation. You may join me if you wish, but absolutely no talking when we first enter a room. You may once I give you the signal to do so.” She then looked directly at me. “That goes for you too. So, do you both understand?” We both nodded and while Nancy went off with her during the inspection, I elected to stay downstairs and read a few books Nancy had purchased for me. A lot of them were above the usual Little’s reading level, but we had hidden those away for today. Instead, I perused through a few of the others directed more towards Big children. Simple still, but there was at least more than a single basic sentence on each page. I soon became engrossed in the book of the tiny beaver, but not thirty minutes later, Nancy and Agent Dawson returned from the inspection upstairs. “Oh yes, we have a nighttime routine,” Nancy continued. “Most of the times it’s the usual fair, but I’ve also included reading to her at night as well.” Both then noticed me with the open book in my lap. “As you can see, she’s quite the reader.” “I see… very interesting…” was about all Agent Dawson said then or any of the other times I overheard her respond to something that Nancy had just said. I could feel the desperation practically ooze off Nancy that all this would go well and a search of Agent Dawson’s facial features to confirm that. To her growing annoyance though, I could tell she saw that the agent wasn’t going to break for her today. The two walked around a little more and Agent Dawson even made some embarrassing comments about the potty chair that Nancy had set up for me in the downstairs bathroom. It was purple and decorated with fairies, but I honestly didn’t mind this one. I suppose it might have had something to do with the fact that I had few other options around here or wasn’t forced to use it like with Kathy, but it was more likely the fact that I could actually sit on it without help as compared to a normal-sized Big toilet, and that Nancy wouldn’t watch me like Kathy had started to do in the end. The two kept talking, but finally came back into the room where both then looked at me. Agent Dawson spoke first. “Emily. I need to ask you some questions and then I should be on my way, okay?” “It will be okay, Emily,” Nancy reassured me. So, feeling the tiny confidence that Nancy had instilled in me, I nodded. Agent Dawson then smiled and sat in front of me, and Nancy went outside to wait on the back porch as per protocol. “Now then…” Agent Dawson reviewed her notes a little more. “Let’s just get to these. No pressure whatever your answer, but just tell me the truth, understand?” I nodded. “Good. First, are you fed enough here?” The question was straight forward, but I had to think about it for a moment. “Uh, I think so. Definitely more than I was at the foster home though.” Agent Dawson and scribbled out some notes. “Are you satisfied in your current living situation?” The question was a little harder, but I also knew what I should say, or at least not say. Any hesitation or bumbling around my answer could be viewed as either me lying to her or trying to cover up something else more nefarious. So, I answered about as quickly as my mind could register the question. “Yes. It’s very nice here compared to the foster home.” Again, Agent Dawson nodded and took some more notes. “Are you abused?” I knew this question was coming and I found out later was the main reason that the Little and potential caregiver had to be separated during the questionnaire portion of the inspection. Knowing this question was the biggie of the lot, I responded right away once again. “Absolutely not. Quite the opposite with Nancy actually.” I swore I could see the tiniest hint of a satisfied smirk appear on Agent’s Dawson’s face, but she nodded and only continued to write her own notes down. “Okay, lastly, do you have a favorite thing to do here?” “Hmmm…” I felt this question was a little more to try and end on a positive note with Littles, just to associate the agent with pleasant associations with their visits, instead of the dread that both Nancy and I had been feeling beforehand. In this case, though, what should have been an easy question was actually a little hard. I wanted to say being free to do what I want and not dictated to like I was a mentally regressed Little, but that would have broken everything that Nancy and I were trying to accomplish here with my secretive double life. It wasn’t exactly illegal to be a mentally older Little, but it may have been frowned on by some and could just lead to more issues down the road. So, instead, I just answered the most obvious way I could. “I like being able to read here. It let’s my mind wander and my imagination feel free.” I wasn’t sure if that was completely the answer that Agent Dawson was looking for from the expression on her face afterward, but it had the benefit of being both true and an answer I knew she really couldn’t object to. Then, after scribbling her last note, we both stood up. Nancy saw from outside and re-entered. “So, did everything go well?” Agent Dawson sighed, and I think both Nancy and I held our breaths in tense nervousness. “I think so. I’ll need to file all this paperwork officially, but I can say that there at least weren’t any red flags I noticed today.” Both Nancy and I exhaled loudly. “I’m very glad to hear that,” Nancy said finally. She and Agent Dawson talked a little bit more, but I knew I needed to take the time and get ready for daycare. Nancy and I had elected for an early morning inspection today to interfere the least amount possible with Nancy’s job. Apparently, she still had to miss her morning meeting, but we could both continue with our days as if nothing much had happened if we still left within the next 15 minutes. For Nancy, that meant more board meetings and pitch formations for future projects of her company. For me, that meant Little Friends Daycare. As Nancy finally ended her conversation with Agent Dawson and we both then loaded into the car, I couldn’t help but feel a little apprehensive of what today could hold for me. I can fully admit to the fact that I might have jumped into Nancy’s embrace a little too quickly, but it was to get away from Kathy. I thought she was the worst it could get for a Little here and eventually lead me to just some thumb-sucking drooler of a Little without a hope in ever going back home. I was wrong. At daycare, while the rainbow façade was pleasant and the staff were all kind and caring in their own ways, I hadn’t anticipated the interaction with other Littles that I would face. As the daycare was fully staffed and did not need a reader, plus my ‘covert’ sneaking around with Nancy, meant that the one constant distinguishing factor between me and the other Littles of reading aloud during story time, was no more. At first, it wasn’t so bad. Most of the Littles left me alone and there was a plethora of books, but I was the new Little around here and some of the more regressed Littles, who bordered on if they should be placed in the Canopy room or in the younger Meadows room, didn’t seem to fully understand the concept of the word ‘no.’ I was quickly learning though, that my ‘no’ and their ‘no,’ were two very different things. “Pway wif me?” one of the Littles asked, toddling up to me today after I had settled in and was reading another book by myself. “No,” I said firmly, but the Little just wouldn’t leave. I tried to ignore them, but I saw the Little then began to pout. “Pwease? I wanna pway wiff you...” “I said no,” I repeated a little louder… too loud, I guess. “Emily!” Miss Valerie admonished me. “We use our inside voices around here.” I nodded and sighed. “Yes Miss Valerie.” I then looked back to the Little in front of me. “Please, kid. I just said no. Go play with that stuffed parrot over there or some other toy like that, or even just another Little for that matter. Just… not me, okay?” The Little nodded and toddled off, clearly dejected, but seemingly fine. I guess they weren’t though, as not five minutes later, I saw them crying and pointing over to me. ‘That little snitch!’ I knew I hadn’t done anything wrong except to say ‘no,’ but those were Earth rules for fellow adults. Being in daycare as a Little, I was finding out just how much the rules around here could be different. Soon, Mrs. Carter marched over to me with her hands on her hips. “Young lady,” she began sternly, glaring down at me from high above. Nervous from her tone and demeanor already, I slowly placed my book down and peered back up at her. “Yes, Mrs. Carter? Is there something wrong?” I tried to play innocent victim as much as I could. From her face though, I don’t exactly think Mrs. Carter bought it. “Don’t play the fool around here, missy,” she nearly spat down to me. “It would do well that if you want to play that angle, I suggest you stop reading the books meant more for the staff than for you Littles.” I glanced down at the book, and I guess Histories of Atlantis to Atlantica would have been a little advanced for most Littles around here. “Sorry…” I then looked back over at the now sniffling Little being rocked around by Miss Valerie. “I just didn’t want to play with them today. I might be a Little, but I’m not that type of Little.” Mrs. Carter frowned. “Just watch out. You’re on thin ice already around here. I would hate for Mrs. Gillies to find out anything more that you’ve done wrong.” I gulped instinctively as Mrs. Carter walked away. Mrs. Gillies was in charge of the whole daycare, and while she would probably do anything to protect her Littles, I also got the distinct impression that she wasn’t the type to be lenient with troublemakers. Despite just wanting to live out my time here until I was going home in one piece, I guess that meant me. A few days later, my reputation hadn’t improved any around here with the staff. Most knew that I was just biding my time until I went home from a slip-up that Nancy made, but I felt a few were giving me odd looks as well. I just chalked it up to them trying to figure out if I was scheming something or going to be problematic for the day, but I guess I should have been a little more careful. I mean, it wasn’t exactly my fault. Being an adult woman, I was coming from Earth here and without any regression procedures or hypnosis done on me, so I was still very independent and thought of myself as an adult. A Little here for sure, but more of the type of classification that on Earth I would be known as a human woman. Not an insult or a judgement on my mental capacity, but just who I was. Looking around even now, there were many types of Littles, but something told me that the staff mostly just lumped us all together. In the Canopy room, most of us were fairly mature and I reveled in being one of the most mature, but that also came at a cost. While for most of the day, I could just lounge about and read to my heart’s content. Playtime and mealtime though in this room, were a different matter. First, I did not want to play dolls or drink at some stupid tea party. That was for babies straight up and I didn’t even entertain the idea. Mrs. Carter and Miss Valerie tried to convince me otherwise and to be a ‘team player,’ but I didn’t want to do some things and I felt I shouldn’t be forced either. So, I was placed further on their ‘problematic Littles’ list, but mealtime was worse. Having been privy to many of the secrets behind the scenes at Mrs. Tatum’s foster home when I helped her out, I knew what a lot of what they were serving was here. The nuggets had the laxative, the milk was just… weird, and the milosauce could be disastrous for any fully unprotected and unsuspecting Little. Some of those issues I had come by literally just reading the labels on the packages, but other times… I’ll just say that I was very grateful that I practically had a bathroom to myself in that foster home. Regardless, I often refused to eat what I was given here for lunch or snack time. Sometimes, some of the kinder workers would notice my plight and would give me something else, but others were more insistent I stick to what the other Littles were given. Mrs. Carter was the more insistent type. “I don’t care what you think you know. Nancy has put us in charge of you during the day, so what we say, goes. Understand, Emily?” I looked at the revolting mush cup before me. I guessed it was an array of fruits mashed up into a plastic cup, similar to milosauce, but I couldn’t be sure. The milosauce was kind of a tannish yellow, but this… I just saw mixtures of brown, red, and purple. “Please… just anything else…” “No,” Mrs. Carter reiterated adamantly. “You either eat this, or we tie a bib around you, I feed it to you personally, and then we tell Nancy when she gets here to pick you up that you were naughty today. How’s that sound?” Her threats were not hollow, and despite Nancy and I being more of equals in about the biggest way we could in our arrangement, I didn’t want her getting a negative report back. She would probably lecture me on me blowing my cover here and that I would get sent back to Mrs. Tatum’s and she would be in trouble with the LPS. Not desiring that fate for either of us, I spooned the alien looking mush and shoveled it into my mouth. I wasn’t really sure what I was expecting, but a myriad of flavors soon assaulted my tongue. Combine cod, rutabaga, raspberries, and maybe spinach or cucumber, and you might just begin to know what I was tasting right then. Seeing Mrs. Carter’s smug smile and anticipating look though, I swallowed it whole. I had to fight my gag reflex about as best I could, but it stayed down. Mrs. Carter’s smile grew, and she then leaned down. “Good girl,” she whispered, “very good girl.” It took all I had to not slug the woman right there for her condescending tone, but she walked off and I continued to down the revolting goop in front of me. Five minutes later, it was empty, and I felt nauseous, but I was allowed to leave the table at least. Not thirty minutes later, however, my suspicions about the mush were proven correct. My guts had been rumbling since I had sat down to read my book. I just wanted to focus on the prince slaughtering the dragon in that particular story, but my stomach, and later bowels, had other ideas. I tried to pass it off as maybe just gas, but right about at that thirty-minute mark, I could quickly feel that it was so much more dangerous. Seeing all the padded rear ends around me, I knew just what was at stake, so I put my book down, to ensure it wouldn’t be ruined from being tossed and that I would be punished as a result, and walked over to the bathroom as gingerly as I could. Now, being that it was the Canopy room, the bathroom adjoining the play area was actually both Big and Little-sized. I wasn’t sure how many Littles were actually making it or even using the potties there, but another grumble from my rear left me little time to contemplate such mysteries in this place. So, I made it over to one of the stalls there, conveniently, a little lower to the ground to ensure privacy, and I let loose. It was terrible and the smell could probably kill some species with any degree of breathing issues, but still though, I had made it. I was erupting hot magma, but I had made it. Unfortunately, even as I washed my hands and exited triumphantly, my success was to be short lived. There, Mrs. Carter was waiting for me sporting yet another scowl etched across her face. “That’s one,” she warned me. “You wait for one of us to take you. You know that.” Feeling put in my place and not wanting to cause a further scene, I nodded. “I’m sorry…” Mrs. Carter grumbled but walked off and left me feeling an odd mix of emotions. I had made it to the potty, a feat that I was noticing from all the crying, that others had not managed themselves. Those donning training pants or panties seemed mortified, but those already in pull-ups seemed devastated. Considering the removal of their name from the pasted tree of Littles in this room in the back corner afterward, it wasn’t hard to deduce that the staff had demoted them both down to the Meadows room and to diapers. Despite my first strike of the day, I knew it could have been worse. And the day continued much like that. The Canopy rules might have been a little more restrictive, but I also knew that we didn’t have naptime like the other rooms in this daycare did. Most of the time, that meant were able to go outside. I wasn’t much for the mud out there sometimes, but the pleasant breezes and sunshine was always a welcome relief. Today though, it was raining, which meant that I was able to stay inside, but that also presented me with a looming problem. Despite the catalog of books in here that weren’t childish, many also seemed to contain propaganda that would always insinuate Littles as hapless and defenseless beings that needed to be cared for. Knowing some of my fellow Littles here, it was an accurate statement for them, but not for everyone… including me. So today, I realized that I had run out of books to read that fit my selection criteria of avoiding both types of books. I mulled about, but when I realized that only left me more open to being begged to join in playing with the other Littles here, I tried to figure out another solution. Just as I was about to read Knowing the Signs Your Little Is Ready, a clear front to eventually get Bigs to demote their Littles back to diapers, I remembered the front lobby had a stack of magazines for awaiting caregivers. I knew it could be a little risky getting to them, but I rationalized that I would just be staying inside the building, so no harm done… right? Having already memorized the patterns of everyone around here when I was bored last week, it didn’t take me long to have realized there was a gap in the staff’s monitoring of the room’s main door, particularly on days where Littles didn’t get the opportunity to burn off their excess energy due to bad weather. “No Timmy! Don’t eat that!” “Put those scissors down Brian!” “That’s not a potty Sabrina!” Smiling a little at my fellow Littles perfect unintended distractions, I knew that it was just possible that both Mrs. Carter and Miss Valerie would even know that I was gone. Sensing my time had come, I quickly slipped out the door and ran down the hallway to the front lobby. Izzy was once again on her lunch break, and I was just tall enough to undo the latch of the front gate to the lobby. In seconds, I was staring at the rack of magazines. “Oh, perfect!” I exclaimed, picking up a magazine that almost looked like the ones I read back home. I knew I probably couldn’t get any nail polish advertised on the front cover from Nancy, but I also saw that there was a whole travel section in the back. “Hmmm… might be inter…” “And just what do you think you’re doing?” I heard a voice thunder. I nearly dropped the magazine on the ground as I spun around to face the voice. There, standing before me and mad as I had ever seen her, was Mrs. Gillies. It didn’t take a genius to realize how badly I had screwed up. “I asked you a question, Emily…” she said impatiently. “Uh, I…” I stammered out. Her sheer size nearly blocking the rainbow-painted wall behind her was enough to cower any Little, let alone just me all alone and doing something I knew I probably shouldn’t have. “I just wanted to, uh… read. I didn’t even leave the building or anything… I just wanted to see and to learn and to…” Mrs. Gillies snapped her hand up to stop me. “Stop. Just stop, Emily.” She shook her head in clear disappointment. “I thought I could trust you as one of the older Littles here, or at least a Little that the others could look up to. I mean, what would the others think if they saw you up here? Don’t you think they would want to follow?” I hadn’t actually thought about that, but Mrs. Gillies only pushed the issue further. “And what if the door had been unlocked. We get packages in here all the time and mistakes happen. So, what if one of your followers escaped and were kidnapped? Or what if they got hit by a car out there?” Her voice thundered now and yet contained a note of sadness over all of it. She was right of course, but I felt I needed to defend myself. “But no one followed me. It’s just a book, Mrs. Gillies…” I tried to offer up as a counterpoint to her argument. I don’t think it worked. Mrs. Gillies shook her head. “Unbelievable… I thought… hoped you would be different here, Emily. I guess I was wrong…” For a moment, I thought she was just going to walk away in disappointment. No doubt Nancy would have gotten a report about my single, now likely double strike, and I would be yelled at when I got home, but I felt pretty safe that I was still fine. Mrs. Gillies, it seemed, had other plans. In a second, she launched herself back over to me, hands first. I had barely enough time to put the magazine down when her hands scooped around my torso. I wasn’t a shorty back home by any measure, but Mrs. Gillies lifted me up like I was just some featherweight pillow into the crook of her arm. “Put me down!” I squawked at my captor. “It was just a magazine. Let me go!” I began to struggle and despite my best effort, Mrs. Gillies only hauled me further back into the main area of the daycare. Unfortunately, I didn’t get the hint that I would be going straight to the back of the daycare, where other naughty Littles went, whether I wanted to or not. So, when I began thrashing about and kicking wildly, I didn’t think of the consequences… or where my legs were kicking. In a second, my leg hit a large lamp, which then toppled over and pulled the phone sitting next to it to the ground. In less than a blink of an eye, the phone practically exploded into several tiny pieces, the lamp cracked, and the lamp shade was permanently ruined. In horror, I stopped kicking, but Mrs. Gillies halted and looked back at the now broken lamp and phone on the ground before sighing. “I guess I was very wrong about you Emily… shame too…” She paused, looked down at the shattered objects on the floor, and then turned around. “That’s two and three…” My heart practically stopped, and my body went limp. Now that my brain wasn’t simply lashing out and being hauled away, I knew strike two meant that I was going to the backroom. Other Littles that had been punished for one discretion or another went back there and would come out minutes later filled with tears and, more often than not, a sore rear end. I was dreading that, but something was different about the Littles that got to strike three. I wasn’t sure what exactly, but they had definitely changed somehow. Passing by one of the ugliest stuffed dogs I think I had ever seen in front of a near drooling Little, Mrs. Gillies finally stopped after passing through the Canopy room where several of the Littles had ‘oohed’ like they were in elementary school… appropriate I suppose. She then went through another door that only the staff used and found Miss Valerie sitting and eating a candy bar. She immediately bolted to attention once she saw Mrs. Gillies. Her face was full of panic. “Mrs. Gillies. I, uh, I swear, I was on my break and…” Mrs. Gillies held her hand up like she did to me to stop Miss Valerie. “Easy there. I don’t mind you taking a break. Today would have been recess if it wasn’t for the waterworks opening everywhere outside today. I know how these rooms can get on days like today and breaks are actually a little encouraged for you all to destress a little. Which is why,” she then peered over at me, and Miss Valerie spotted me as well, “I want you to take Emily here into the back room and then to meet Bee. For now, I will help out Mrs. Carter in the Canopy room.” Miss Valerie seemed stunned for a moment, but after swallowing what I could imagine was a little piece of candy still in her mouth, she nodded. Mrs. Gillies set me on the floor and Miss Valerie held her hand out. “Please take my hand, sweetie.” I could only gulp, comply, and then look back as Mrs. Gillies waved goodbye to me with a giant grin as if she knew something I didn’t about what awaited me next. Stunned and unnerved by everything, I almost wanted to bite Miss Valerie’s hand in desperation and then flee as best I could to a safe zone far away. Passing through a heavy door into what only could be described as a cutesy dungeon of sorts, I quickly decided not to. “Okay, sweetie. This is your first time here. I hope there isn’t another time, but I guess that will just be up to you.” She then gestured to a bench of sorts with padding on the top. “Take seat, chest on the top and bend over. Once you’re situated, don’t move an inch.” Instantly, I knew my fate. It was a little more elaborate than what Kathy had done with me, but I knew the preparation for a spanking by now when I saw it. So, not wanting to make my fate even worse, I just complied as quickly as I could. Behind me, Miss Valerie proceeded to nearly fondle a whole bunch of implements hanging off a rack, but finally chose the ping pong paddle and walked back over to me. “Not very traditional I grant you in some of these cases, but I think it will do the trick for today.” Seeing the large red surface, I just winced and hoped that all this would be over soon. “Okay. Seeing what you have next… I guess just 10 will do today…” she said, rubbing the paddle and then gliding it over my butt. I shut my eyes about as tight as they would go after that. I still trembled in fear, but it only got worse, when she suddenly hiked up my skirt for the day and then yanked down both my tights and my training panties, today’s pair marked by little, tiny hearts. I could hear Miss Valerie chuckle for a moment, but I didn’t have time to contemplate it for long. The first smack roared into me like a freight train. Kathy was sadistic and strong, but Miss Valerie was clearly practiced and powerful. Each smack I felt seemed like the equivalent to two of what Kathy could produce. I was in tears by the fifth smack. My delicate rear throbbed, and the sheer pain wouldn’t go away by the eighth. Still, after ten, Miss Valerie hung the paddle back up and allowed me the dignity to stay there on the bench for a moment before I then lifted my own tights and training panties back up. Despite my punishment, I vowed right then that I would escape this place no matter what as soon as I could if any of this happened again. Nancy was wonderful, but she wasn’t worth what was now occurring at the daycare. Regardless, Miss Valerie then sighed and popped me out of my own thoughts. “I’m sorry about that, Emily,” she said with an almost odd, noted tone of concern. “I really don’t like doing that, but you need to learn to behave. You should know that Mrs. Gillies always gets her way in the end. One way or another…” I wanted to ask what she meant by that, but she only held her hand out once more and towed me to the next room. I wasn’t sure what to expect after the pink and purple room I had just come from, but a medical lab with spots of color and toys was not it. A woman sitting down at the far end of some lab equipment then looked up and placed her glasses on the table in front of her. She quickly saw me being dragged along. “A new girl, Val?” Miss Valerie nodded. “That’s right, Bee. Just a single dose though today, okay? Mrs. Gillies doesn’t want her overdone. Just needs to learn a lesson… got it?” Bee got up and rolled her eyes a little. “I got it, I got it, okay? I’m sure… Emilly and I will get a long just fine. Isn’t that right, sweetie?” I was petrified of the room and of this new woman already as I was being introduced to her, but my mind swam with tons of other questions… namely, how did she know my name? I could hear Miss Valerie sigh again and she then pulled me across the room and got me to sit in a large, padded seat. “Just rest your arm there, sweetie,” she said dejectedly while pointing to the arm rest by my left arm. I quickly complied, still feeling the enormous sting from the spanking I had just endured. I thought that if I complied, I wouldn’t be punished anymore. Making a few clinking noises, I saw that Bee started to prepare something that I couldn’t quite make out. “Is it in place and are we doing the standard first time?” she then asked. Miss Valerie sighed yet again. “Yes… standard and in place.” “Good…” Bee said a little too sinisterly for my liking, but before I had a chance to ask, straps quickly popped out and cinched themselves around my chest, arms, and legs. “Hey! What the hell are you all doing?” I asked in protest, struggling in vain to get loose. “Ooh. Naughty, naughty,” Bee chided me. She then turned around and my eyes bulged out when I saw the shot that she was now carrying back to me. “We’ll fix that right away though… won’t we, Val?” Miss Valerie seemed to be in pain herself and numbly nodded. “You take care of things here… I’ll be… outside.” She then got up and left me alone with Bee. Despite her having just spanked me, I already missed her… or at least compared to the evil doctor-looking woman now approaching me with a giant needle. “Okay!” she said way too cheerfully. “Just one prick and it will all be over.” I tried to struggle, but the straps were too tight. Unfortunately, the ones on my arm were even tighter and the extra straps employed held my upper arm completely in place. I couldn’t even wiggle it more than a millimeter I suspected. The needle plunged quicky into my arm and I swore with the force Bee used, the darn thing would have gone right through. Instead, I just felt the hot liquid enter my arms and quickly get pumped around my body. It was a foreign invader and it burned wherever it went. Oddly though, after a moment, the burning feeling went away, and I was almost left with a buzzing sensation, like the kind you would feel when you were drunk. It wasn’t exactly unpleasant, and I felt almost a whiplash of sorts going from such pain to such pleasure so soon after. Bee smiled down on me. “Perfect. I can already see that it’s working. Shame it’s not more today but considering where you just came from and a few other little secrets I know, I’m pretty sure you’ll be back. Too bad you won’t remember though!” She then cackled a little as she got up and started bringing over another device. “What do you mea…?” but that was about all that I could make out. The buzzing sensation increased, and Bee quickly swung the large machine and a monitor in front of my face. I didn’t think much of it at first, but with each passing moment, I felt more drawn into the center of the pretty colors I started to see… more focused… more sleepy… happier even… I swore I even heard a tinkling noise as my eyes began to droop. I was almost a little scared, but at the same time, I had oddly never felt better and even the stinging in my rear had dissipated. It was nearly pure bliss. I wanted it to last forever, but my exhaustion ruled me more than anything else. Soon, my eyes shuttered close and everything faded to black. * * * My eyes bolted open. ‘Wha…? Where am I?’ My mind turned over and tried to put the pieces of afternoon back into place. Other Littles were just waking up that had taken impromptu naps as well I guessed as myself, but a few also seemed they would be demoted down to something more protective at night. Panicking, my hands shot between my legs, but I sighed in relief. ‘Dry… that’s good at least… Nancy would have been so upset with me over ruining my pretty training panties.’ I smiled at the sensation of being so much older than all these other babies. I could read and write and go to the potty by myself. I was a big gir… I shook my head. I guess I was still just coming out of my post nap slumber and was a little foggy. My arm hurt a bit and my butt definitely stung, but it was just kind of hard to figure out why. It strangely felt like a hangover when I used to drink… ‘When I was a teacher? Was I a teacher?’ I shook my head again and just hoped that my fuzziness would go away soon. It was super frustrating. I guess to some extent, a little later though, it kind of did. To be blunt, I was a little more distracted by then with some of the looks that other Littles or staff were giving me, but I just shuffled it off as both of them being weird in this funny place. I mean, they even had birds in all those lush tree branches all above me. I gazed in wonder and at all the beautiful colors up there. I was so engrossed though, that a book soon slid off my lap. Curious and not remembering the ending, I reopened it. Fascinated with the tale in moments, I just buried my head in a book and just really hoped that the prince would be okay and make it back to his castle and his one true love. ‘It’s so romantic!’ I never read the ending though, as right when he slayed the scary monster, Miss Valerie called out my name. “Emily? Emily?” She then spotted me and smiled. “There you are!” Her arms then waved me over. “Come on! Nancy is here for you out front!” I smiled widely and placed the book back where all the others were neatly stacked. I then made sure to gather up my bag and I was so giddy with excitement, I nearly skipped to the front lobby. It was all so easy and wonderful, and as a bonus, Miss Valerie was so nice to me. I mean, she even held the lobby gate open for me and gave a glowing report back to Nancy about the type of day I had. I was a little glad about that too because some of it still seemed a bit hazy, but I was just so proud of the good day I apparently had here. Nancy strangely seemed to give me an odd look of sorts after, but in the end, I was just happy that we were going home now. As a cherry on top, Mrs. Gillies even stepped out and noted my growing progress here at the daycare, which definitely elicited a smile from Nancy this time, much to my delight. ‘I wonder if I’ll get some ice cream tonight as a treat?’ I still felt a little strange, but if Mrs. Gillies, Miss Valerie, and Nancy were all happy, then I just supposed that everything was good. After all, if they cared about me, then all was good, and their happiness would be mine and I would be safe from all the evils of this world.

Chapter 24 “Good morning Miss Lizzie, I am your Nanny, Sharlese.” The woman said with a smile and a slight foreign accent. Now that Elizabeth was wide awake she did another take of the woman. She was wearing a grey dress with the top above her chest and to her collar in pure white. The sleeves of the dress were very prestinely rolled up to just above her elbows and had been ironed flat into the sharpest, straightest edge possible. She had a maroon beret atop her head of pure white hair that was in a military style braid draped over her shoulder and was wearing glasses with perfect circle lenses just smaller than her eyes perched on her nose with their delicate wire frame. The chest of the dress had some sort of crest insignia embroidered on the right breast, a company logo that Elizabeth didn’t recognize even being a nanny herself. The woman was physically large, she wasn’t all toned muscle like Max but had a very matronly build. Her perfect appearance left a very dominant aura hanging in the air and her sapphire blue eyes looked down through the bars at Elizabeth asserting dominance without any action or word. “W-where’s Max Miss Sharlese?” Elizabeth was finally able to ask, still trapped in the cage of the crib and bound up in the sleeper. “He had to take an early morning meeting that he put off to be with you last evening. He has asked me to step in this morning to aid you in your morning routine. I am well aware of your particular circumstances little Lizzie. Now, would you like to get up, it is quite early still as the sun has just risen and we wouldn’t want a cranky baby.” Sharlese explained in her accent that Elizabeth still couldn’t place. Elizabeth was a bit taken aback being called a baby and little but a quick thought of the current predicament validated Miss Sharlese’s words with a blush. Elizabeth pondered for a moment if she was ready to get up but she was quite stiff from spending the night bound in the sleeper. She decided since she was being offered she might as well get up and her chances of falling back asleep with the nanny here were slim. She nervously responded “now would be good… nanny.” Elizabeth wasn’t sure how deep this scenario was. From her own experiences, she was accustomed to punishing littles for insincerity and lack of reform, clearly defining roles and following rules was the best course of action in this situation as she wasn’t ready for a morning spanking. “Very well.” The nanny responded before extracting a key from a hip pocket and opening the locks on the lid of the crib and dropping the side. She leaned over Elizabeth and with seeming ease and hoisted the diapered amazon from the crib onto her hip. Elizabeth was carried to the changing table of the nursery. A strap was brought across her stomach to keep her pinned to the table despite the bumpers that would keep her from rolling off. Sharlese pulled a pacifier from her pocket and slid the clean bulb into Elizabeth’s mouth without any fuss. It had a strange taste to it that reminded her of the previous night’s closing activity that honestly made her mouth water as she sucked naturally and blushed. Elizabeth began to look around the nursery for the first time with light now that she had a moment. The furniture of the room was all dark stained hardwood, close to black but not quite, it all had a reddish hue to it underneath the stain that with the right angle of lighting was very pretty. There was a large wardrobe in the corner with a key hole in the centre of the doors for the main cabinet and the foot drawers below each had the same. She looked at the crib next, the sheets were a dark forest green that reminded her of Max’s eyes and she noticed the three brass keyholes along the top rail that locked the lid down, it was the same design on the dresser. Elizabeth assumed the same key that Sharlese had used to free her from the crib would unlock everything in here. There was a large vanity near the wardrobe. It matched the other furnitures’ aesthetic or stained wood and instead of series of bulbs to outline the mirror as was common, there were fake candles with candle shaped bulbs. There wasn’t anything on the top of the vanity desk which Elizabeth assumed meant that everything was stored in the drawers away from prying eyes and curious hands. Specifically her curious hands and prying eyes. There was a large black rocking chair towards the foot of the changing table. With a green velvet cushion and backrest, again in the same colour as the crib’s sheets. Each piece of furniture was covered with delicately carved gothic style accents that matched the crown moulding around the ceiling of the room. The walls were a light grey that complimented the black and green theme along with the creamy white carpet and ceiling. She had only caught a glimpse of the rug in the centre of the room but Elizabeth knew the forest green emblem had to be Max's family seal. It all gave Elizabeth a tingly sensation in her tummy, she was sure she had grown out of the goth phase but the unique nursery was unlike any she had seen before and the gothic Lolita aesthetic resonated with her despite never having been able to dress that way with work and school. She secretly had a whole Pinterest board dedicated to the theme and her black hair and golden eyes would be a perfect match. It felt mature but at the same the outfits were so cute and little esque just in dark bold colours as opposed to the bright pastels that littles wore. Miss Sharlese undid the first restraint binding Elizabeth’s arm but kept a hold on her wrist to keep her from extending her arm. Slowly and methodically, the nanny began to massage Elizabeth’s arm from the shoulder to the elbow with her free hand slowly let her arm extend while working down. The massage felt glorious and Elizabeth felt like she was melting at the deep muscle soothing. As her arm was fully extended she could tell that the massage was much needed, being bound during the night had her cramped up and if she had just extended her arm immediately after release she knew she’d be in pain. The process was repeated with her other arm and then her legs. The fabric of the sleeper encasing her felt luxurious throughout the process and she would’ve found herself falling back asleep to the massage had she not been so self conscious of her current situation and completely red in the face. A practical stranger she had spent the night with had hired another stranger to be her caretaker. It seemed a little absurd and the Nanny not even flinching to the sight of an Amazon in a crib was a little questionable. “You may ask a few questions and I will try to answer within my bounds.” Miss Sharlese explained as she bicycle pumped Elizabeth’s legs up into her chest how a parent may for a baby to induce a bowel movement, the plug would ensure against that but Elizabeth would be lying if she said that it didn’t feel like it was increasing the pressure in her backside. Sharlese had seen the expression on Elizabeth’s face and was astute enough to recognize pondering. She had also been told the bounds she was to work in and had thoroughly read the contract she had signed with the owner of the international shipping agency that supplied her foundation with materials. She had had her suspicions about him and had been waiting for the day he called her up for her services. “Who do you work for?” Elizabeth finally formed her first question while her arms were worked in helicopter motions at the elbow to restore rotation, staring at the emblem on the nanny’s chest still trying to decipher the embroidered logo. The nanny noted the adorable lisp the pacifier created in the Amazon charge’s mouth and smiled a little. Sharlese giggled a little at the question before her response. “I am on assignment and on loan to Master Guildroy from the White Lotus Foundation.” The logo made sense now to Elizabeth who could see the flower design within the image but it was still a very complex logo and Elizabeth knew there was something more to it. The strap holding her down was undone and she was flipped onto her stomach for access to the panel sealing the zipper of the sleeper. Elizabeth turned her head to the side, looking away from the nanny to ask her next question. “Am I… am I your first Amazon charge Miss Sharlese? Is it strange or weird that an Amazon woman is in diapers being treated as a baby?” She asked a little hesitantly. “I’m not allowed to fully disclose that particular information but no, you are not my first Amazon. I also don’t find it strange or weird as you put it to have an amazon charge. Everyone has needs, wants, and different upbringings that lead to different development. From what I can tell, you slip into this role very easily and from my experience that’s an upbringing that speaks of growing up too fast and neglect. This side of you is a defence mechanism and outlet for relaxation and release from the burdens you have been saddled with.” Miss Sharlese explained, hitting the nail right on the head and bringing up the dream Elizabeth had had overnight. “The White lotus foundation only works with willing participants whether they be little, tweener, or amazon. I, or a member from my group, will be your trainer in a way to help you accept your position below Master Guildroy and determine what your limits and boundaries are. Some things are non-negotiable but I will help you accept those things.” The nanny explained simply while giving Elizabeth more to digest. The zipper was brought down quickly which allowed the cool air of the nursery into the sleeper and a shiver to run down Elizabeth's spine. She was flipped back over and her arms extracted from the garment and pulled down exposing her chest. Her legs were lifted next and the feet of the sleeper were pulled until it was free and discarded into the laundry hamper, leaving Elizabeth in just her wet diaper that caused her hands to come up and cover her blushing face while she nursed the pacifier a little more aggressively. Elizabeth had formed her next question by this point. “What sort of things are non-negotiable to Max?” She asked a little worried that it may be things that are too far out of her comfort zone to accept. “To answer that you will have to experience it.” Miss Sharlese explained. Elizabeth was a little frightened by the response but she didn’t really have a choice in the matter. She had no clothes, she was still in a diaper and plugged which had built up an obscene amount of pressure in her bowels overnight. She was at the mercy of the nanny and just based on how prestigious and professional this woman seemed along with her clear advantages she didn’t really have any option otherwise. She really didn’t want to test the Nanny and end up over her lap, that would be hard to explain to Bethany when she got home, why she had a red bottom, especially after she had spent the night out at a man’s house, there would already be enough prying on their activities as it stood. Miss Sharlese took hold of the first tape of the diaper and pried it away from the landing strip. The process was repeated to every tape until Elizabeth felt the front of the diaper relax away from her skin. She peaked out from behind her fingers and watched as the diaper was pulled away. “My my, you did quite a number on that diaper and you didn’t even stir slightly in your sleep.” Miss Sharlese commented as she extracted the diaper from under Elizabeth and balled it up, taping it closed on itself before dropping it in the diaper bin. Elizabeth blushed in embarrassment at the bedwetting comment, she really had flooded the diaper in her sleep and hadn’t even noticed it. She put on a set of latex gloves and commented. “We’ll have to remove this but I expect you to hold it in until I get your diaper change finished.” Miss Sharlese commented as she firmly pushed against the base of the plug, eliciting a yelp from Elizabeth and a new shade of red in her cheeks. It was still cold inside of her which had been a constant reminder of its presence, she figured it must be a high end ice plug that stayed cool constantly so the wearer couldn’t become accustomed to it. “But we can take this out for now” Sharlese said as she took hold of the tail of the vibrator that was still left inside her from the previous night. She hadn’t even noticed that she was turned on and self lubricating at the attention and humiliation from the nanny who easily pulled the vibe out in a gentle and slow movement. A few warmed wet wipes ensured Elizabeth was clean enough for a new diaper and wiped away the faint scent of sex that had been marinating in her diaper with her nighttime accidents. Elizabeth couldn’t watch as a new diaper was pulled from under the changing table and was unfolded and fluffed out. Miss Sharlese expertly slid the diaper under Elizabeth’s bottom and applied a bit of oil and powder before her hand moved to the plug. “Deep breath now and make sure you hold it in.” Elizabeth just now came to the realisation that the reason she had to hold it in was so that she would fill the diaper. She really didn’t want to poop her pants but knew if she didn’t follow that instruction this nanny could probably come up with some pretty nefarious punishments. Lost in her train of thought, she had realised that the nanny had taken hold of the base of the plug and was already pulling. She let out another yelp that masked her moan as the girth of the plug exited her rear. Sharlese kept a little forward pressure on the plug to keep Elizabeth from expelling it quicker as the taper of the plug helped itself out of the girl. Elizabeth clenched her muscles with all of her might to hold back the pressure that had built overnight. Being plugged all night had dramatically fatigued her sphincter and she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold for long. Sharlese set the plug aside and quickly folded the diaper between Elizabeth’s legs in case she couldn’t hold out. The tapes were pulled tight on the diaper, granted a little slowly to test the girl before the nanny reached for the strap holding her down. Elizabeth didn’t even make it that long as her body fought to expel its waste. She groaned and whispered “noooo” as her stomach clenched and she gave an involuntary push. Miss Sharlese paused from unbuckling Elizabeth as her hands came down from her face to grip the sides of the changing table as her body put in all of its effort to relieve itself. It felt like she had more waste than amazonly possible as she lightly shook under the cramped pushing for what felt like an hour. The diaper swelled dramatically under the load that had been deposited and Elizabeth could feel the mush filling every corner of the seat of the garment. 10 minutes after losing the fight, and panting a little on the table, Elizabeth’s body felt like it was 10 pounds lighter. The relief was immense and she hadn’t noticed how bad she had to go with the plug still inside her. “That was very naughty little Lizzie.” Sharlese commented as she looked down with disappointment at Elizabeth. “B-but I held it in for the diaper.” Elizabeth said blushing. “You’ll note that I said hold it in until your change was finished. You are still on the changing table, therefore the change was not finished. We will have to correct that and I don’t believe I gave you permission to talk back to your nanny. If you had talked back to the master like that I’m sure his punishment would be much worse than mine will be.” Elizabeth froze hearing the “will be.” She knew she shouldn’t have talked back or tried to dispute the nanny, she’d punish her charges as well for that kind of comment. “Y-yes nanny.” Elizabeth finally stuttered out as the buckle for the strap holding her down was released, trying to earn at least a few brownie points to minimise the damages. Elizabeth was lifted from the table and set on the floor on all fours. It forced her to look up at Sharlese who looked even bigger now that she stood menacingly over her. Sharlese turned and in two strides was at the rocking chair. “Come here.” Was the command followed by a finger that pointed to the floor next to her leg. Elizabeth knew she was to crawl over and sit next to the nanny and promptly did so, her diapered bottom swaying in the air as she quickly made the move. The load in her diaper was causing it to droop between her legs and she was a little grateful to have a moment of reprieve from the mush. Elizabeth took up her position next to the nanny and sat with her hands between her knees but hovering a little to keep the diaper off the floor and from squishing the mess back into her skin. She was still naked aside from the diaper but surprisingly wasn’t feeling bashful about her nudity but was more so embarrassed by the stink filling the air around her which overrode any other embarrassment. “Being a nanny yourself, I imagine you know what is coming. We will begin after you’ve properly taken your position.” Sharlese said as she looked down over her nose. Elizabeth knew what she meant and slowly lowered her bottom into the mess with a slight grimace, casting her eyes to the floor between her legs as her full weight sank into the messy padding. It was the first time she looked at the diaper since being in it. It was a deep purple colour with white stars cascading across the surface. She recognized it as an Amazon sized version of a little’s diaper she occasionally saw. She let her knees out a little to get comfortable in the W sitting position with her palms on the floor, fully settling into her waste. “Very good, you can be a good girl after all. I’m glad you have experience so I won’t have to fully train you. But, with your experience you should know better to begin with and will be held to a higher standard from the get go. Now, up.” Sharlese said, giving her lap a gentle pat with her hand. Elizabeth followed the order, knowing she had no other choice. She draped herself across the large legs of the Amazon sitting in the rocking chair, her padded posterior aimed up in the air. “For now we will start with 10 for talking back to your nanny.” Sharlese said as she let her hand fly forward into the seat of Elizabeth’s diaper. The mush seemed to explode against her skin and stick the diaper to her bottom. The blow was intense for Elizabeth and she let out a little squeak from the abrupt impact. Sharlese was even more in tune with her spanking abilities as she expertly landed blow after blow. The final strike broke Elizabeth as she let the tears out finally and quietly sobbed over her reddened bottom. “Very good, you're such a brave girl.” Sharlese said as she repositioned the Amazon into her lap and cuddled her into her substantial bosom. The praise felt good and Elizabeth calmed down almost immediately to the hand stroking her head. Sharlese was impressed with how easy this amazon in her lap submitted. The ones she typically worked with would need lots of work to pull out the submissive side they craved, Elizabeth seemed almost naturally submissive which was a rarity amongst amazons. “For being such a good girl, we’ll do a little horsey ride as your punishment for not holding it and forgo the remainder of the spanking.” Sharlese said as she repositioned Elizabeth onto her knees. Elizabeth was bouncing up and down before she could react to the much stronger amazon that was tossing her around as if she were a little. Sharlese’s hands supported her hips as she moved up and down the mush in her diaper spreading out just the tiny bit more that it could after the spanking. The ride was causing all sort of conflicting emotions to bounce around in her body with each jolt. It felt good in the diaper the way it rubbed her but her mind kept trying to tell her it was disgusting to take pleasure from her own poop squishing around inside a diaper against her skin. Overall the pleasure won out and her vision filled with stars as she achieved orgasm with a soft moan and a tense body as Sharlese quit bouncing and let her ride out the high. It was truly fascinating to Sharlese how easy this Amazon was. Max sure knew how to pick them and if she hadn’t already been claimed by Max, Sharlese would have put in her own bid for the Amazon girl in her lap. She knew she was going to enjoy this and understood why she hadn’t heard from Master Guildroy sooner, he had just been holding out for the perfect one. She felt an odd feeling for the first time in a long, was it jealousy? She stuffed the emotion back down and shook her head a little, she was far too old and busy for jealousy or taking on a charge full time but this Elizabeth girl peaked her interest. Sharlene broke from her thoughts as she recognized Lizzie’s breathing stabilizing. She hoisted the girl onto her hip as she rose from the rocking chair and headed for the nursery door. Elizabeth panicked a little, Max had mentioned that his help had been off for the evening but she wasn’t sure if they’d be back this morning. She was a little frightened by the prospect of being seen by a maid in her current condition as she rode the hip of the matron amazon caring for her. She buried her face in the nanny’s shoulder as the door opened to the hallway and stepped out. Elizabeth peaked out a little as she was carried down the stairs and into what appeared to be a kitchen. She had no defenses as she was pried off of the nanny and set down with a quiet squelch from her padding. Being naked all of a sudden mattered quite a bit and she brought her arms up to cover her chest. She opened her eyes just in time to see the nanny sliding a tray in front of her with an audible and sturdy click. She looked down and shifted a little as she came to realize she was trapped in an Amazon sized high chair. A post was positioned between her legs and mildly reminded her of the nanny’s large knees pressing against her sodden diaper. Sharlese pullled Elizabeth’s hands away from her chest and attached cuffs to each wrist that kept them at tray level. Next her ankles were secured to the legs of the chair followed by a strap that passed under her breasts and one above that kept her back pinned to the chair. The nanny went about preparing a breakfast suitable for the Amazon baby in her care. The longest process was waiting for the water to boil for the massive serving of oatmeal she was making. After the dry flakes soaked up the hot water and were ready she shoveled on a heaping spoonful of sugar and a few handfuls of dried prunes completed the bowel. She may not be around for the catastrophe this breakfast would wreak on the Amazon’s diaper after she was returned to her older sister but she made sure it would definitely have an effect. The dish was set on the tray in front of Elizabeth and Miss Sharlese dug a large spoon in and lifted it to Elizabeth’s mouth. She hadn’t had oatmeal in a long time but she knew of the fibre content having great effects on littles. She grimaced a little expecting the taste of cardboard but was pleasantly surprised by the sweet flavour. Miss Sharlese fed her spoon after spoon, occasionally missing her mouth to drop some of the contents on her chest. An Amazon sized serving of oatmeal and prunes was substantial and it took a solid fifteen minutes before Sharlese was scraping the bowl clean. The brown sugar sprinkled across the top was long gone and Elizabeth was struggling to finish the serving as her stomach dissented with food. She was practically in a food coma and don’t think she could handle another bite as she slouched in the chair stuffed. Sharlese cleaned the dishes while Elizabeth recovered a bit in the chair. She wasn’t expecting a large bottle to be held up to her lips when Sharlese returned. She tried to turn her head away but Sharlese kept the nipple of the bottle against her lips and demonstrated her skills in patience. “Come now dear Lizzie, we want to make sure you have a nice soggy diaper for your big sister when you get home.” Sharlese teased the nipple against her lips some more but Elizabeth still refused to accept the bottle. “Suit yourself, you’re only making it much harder for yourself.” Sharlese said as she removed the restraints followed by the tray. Elizabeth was quickly carried back to the nursery without another word. She knew refusing the bottle would more than likely earn her some sort of punishment but she couldn’t even think about taking in any more food or liquid. She was deposited onto the changing table where a series of cuffs were added to her limbs and unceremoniously attached to the anchors in the table. Sharlese went about her way and stripped the tapes of the diaper and began work on cleaning up the mess of smeared waste with a pile of wet wipes after she put on a set of gloves. Elizabeth could tell internally from the lack of emotion that Sharlese was upset as there was no caring emotion in the cleaning process as she was wiped down. Content with Elizabeth’s front, her legs were unclipped and repositioned to how she was the night before with Max which brought with it a flood of naughty thoughts. Sharlese however just continued cleaning Elizabeth up before extracting the diaper from underneath her and balling it up for the garbage bin. “Now, let’s go get you showered and bathed so you smell like a nice little girl when you go home.” Sharlese said with a smile that Elizabeth could tell was hiding something sinister. “And don’t think I’ve forgotten about refusing your baba, we’ll take care of that as well.”

Chapter 15: Diaper Change Suddenly, a kind voice broke through the chaos, offering a glimmer of hope amidst the embarrassment. "Excuse me. I don't mean to intrude." an older woman interrupted, her tone sympathetic as she approached Kim and the family. Kim blinked in surprise, her eyes narrowing with suspicion as she moved Kris behind her to protect him from the stranger approaching. "Can I help you?" Kevin stepped in, wanting to keep his family safe. "I was actually wondering if I could help you folks. I noticed your little one might need a hand, and it doesn't look like y'all have anything with you. I've been in a similar situation many times, and always come prepared." the lady spoke while opening up her purse lightly to show off a diaper and a pack of baby wipes. Kim looked at Kevin, wondering if they should take the elder up on her offer. They didn't have anything else, but it seemed like a better option than nothing. Meanwhile, Kris was praying that they wouldn't take her up on the offer. As much as he didn't want to be in a dirty diaper, at least his was a pull-up. The one in her purse looked like a proper diaper. He didn't want another one. He wanted his underwear. It was his mom's idea he wore this thing in the first place. Even as much as he hates to admit it, it turned out to be a good idea. "Are you sure? I don't want to inconvenience you." Kim spoke up. After getting a defeated look from her husband, he knew they didn't have many options. Embarrassing as it was, this was better than the alternatives. Kris's eyes got wide, and he tugged at his mom's shirt slightly, causing her to turn around and look at him in the eyes, seeing the worry and embarrassment in them. "It's no trouble at all. After having a few similar situations myself and having no other options, I figured this was the least I could do. Especially for my grandkids. I can't tell you how many families this has saved from a rough day. Just be sure today is forwarded someday, okay?" the kind lady told them, giving them a small wink as she handed them the diaper and a pack of baby wipes. "Thank you. We will," Kim replied, her voice choked with emotion. "You are a true blessing." "It's my pleasure, you folks have a good rest of your day now."The woman smiled warmly, before walking off towards the baggage claim. "Come on, Kris," Kim said, her voice comforting. "Let's go find a restroom and get you cleaned up." Kim gently took Kris's hand, offering him a reassuring smile as she led him towards the family bathrooms in the airport. Kris followed reluctantly, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. He kept his head down, trying to hide his face from the passing strangers, feeling the weight of the diaper between his legs heavily weighing him down. He couldn't believe this was happening, that he was actually going to be changed into a diaper in a public restroom. Once inside the bathroom, Kim locked the door behind them and turned to face Kris, her expression softening with concern. "Okay, sweetheart, let's get you cleaned up," she said gently, guiding Kris toward the changing table. Too short to climb up easily on his own, Kris waited by the changing table. He was terrified at the fact that his mom was helping him clean up. It was both nice to know she cared enough, but this was the first time he was getting help to put on a diaper or a pull-up. He has been managing it on his own this entire time. He stood next to the table shy, not wanting to remove his clothes. "It's okay sweetie. I'm only here to help if you want it. I can wait outside if you'd like?" Kim spoke softly to Kris, seeing the emotional turmoil going through him. "I... I don't know," Kris said shakingly. "I don't want to hold us up. I'm also really nervous about it. That's an actual diaper. I've only had pull-ups." "I know sweetie. I can help you if you want. It's only until we get to the hotel, then you can get changed into underwear, okay?" "You promise?" Kris looked at her with hopeful eyes. He was so ready to be out of diapers and pull-ups. He just wanted to feel like a normal boy again. "I promise. You just tell me what you want help with. Alright? I can have Dad come in if that would make you feel better," Kim offered, reaching toward the bathroom door. "No! I mean, no, thank you. If you could help, that'd... be nice. I'm not really sure what to do without making a bigger mess." Kris couldn't make eye contact anymore, looking down at his feet. "Well, first thing, we don't want to get your pants dirty, so let's get those off. Then I can help you get on the table if you'd like. Do you need help with that?" Her heart broke a little, seeing how defeated Kris felt. Given the circumstances, she was going to make this the best situation she could. Kris simply nodded his head and got himself ready for his mom to help him get cleaned up. Kim, seeing his discomfort, walked over to him, knelt to his level, and gave him the biggest hug she could muster. "It's okay, sweetie. You're doing great. I promise this will be quick, and then we'll be back on our fun trip." Kris hugged her back, feeling a small sense of comfort. He was able to relax slightly as she went from hugging him to picking him up and setting him on the changing table. Kris felt a small wave of embarrassment wash over him for asking his mom to pick him up. He was the family monkey; if anyone could find out how to get on that table without help, it was him. Feeling the cold plastic sent a shiver up his spine as he was placed on his back. The sensation of his dirty diaper squishing from under him caused his eyes to tear up. It felt so slimy and gross. At least he knew he would be out of it soon and could move on with his day. Kim began to remove Kris's pull-up, ripping the side of it open. She spoke softly to him, trying to ease his discomfort. "You're doing great. We'll have you cleaned up in no time, and then we can continue with our trip, okay? Maybe we can stop by an ice cream shop once we finish up in here. How does that sound?" Kris nodded, his cheeks still flushed with embarrassment. He felt a mix of relief and anxiety as his pull-up was taken off. The smell made him cringe, and he couldn't shake the feeling of being a little kid again. Kim's gentle touch and reassuring words helped to calm him slightly. "Alright, sweetheart, let's get you cleaned off," she said, reaching for wipes and the fresh diaper she had brought in with them. Kris tried to focus on the ceiling tiles above him, anything to distract himself from the situation. He felt vulnerable and exposed, his emotions swirling inside him like a storm. He was safe with his mom, but that safety didn't change the fact of what happened. As Kim began to clean him up, Kris couldn't help but feel a surge of gratitude towards his mother. Despite his embarrassment, he knew she was only trying to help him, to make things as comfortable as possible. "It's okay," Kim said softly, noticing his tense demeanor. "I know this isn't easy for you, but we're almost done. Just need you to lift your bottom real quick." Kris managed a weak smile, feeling a little reassured by her words. He closed his eyes as he raised himself up, not wanting to see the diaper. He tried to block out the sounds and smells around him, focusing instead on the warmth of his mother's hands as she worked, a stark contrast to the cold plastic below him. Finally, the diaper change was complete, and Kim helped Kris back to his feet. She handed him the pants they set aside and went over to the trash to throw out the diaper. Kris couldn't help but look at the diaper, now snuggly wrapped around his waist. He blushed, seeing a bunch of small cartoon dogs on it. He also noticed a small yellow line that ran down the middle of the diaper. The whole thing just confirmed his feelings about them. Wearing them was the most embarrassing thing in his life. He snapped back to reality as he saw his mom start to turn around and face him again. He quickly slipped back into his pants, not wanting his mom to see him in the diaper. Which, he realized, was kind of pointless. She had already seen him in it, but the sooner he got covered up, the better he would feel. He felt a sense of relief wash over him as he pulled his pants into place, getting them situated before his mom made eye contact with him again. He was happy the ordeal was finally over. "Thanks, Mom," Kris said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. Kim smiled warmly at him, her eyes filled with love and understanding. "Anytime, sweetheart. Now let's go get that ice cream, okay?" Kris nodded, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. His mother was very loving, making this situation not as bad as he thought it would be. He knew if she was going to be that caring, that he could handle whatever embarrassment came his way. He knew he had someone in his corner, and that's what mattered. He never wanted to be in this situation again, but he knew if he ever was, he could handle it with people around him who cared like his mom had.

When I was growing up in Los Angeles (50s and 60s), there were no less than three different diaper services delivering weekly in my neighborhood, and all had pin on, cloth adult diapers. They were also readily available for purchase at infant's wear and medical supply stores. Vinyl baby pants in adult sizes (and dramatically different quality) were easy to find. I began using an adult service when I was 17, and continued to do so when I moved to Toronto, then back to LA, and ultimately to Minneapolis. Here I was a customer of Crib Diaper Service until they finally shut their doors. Paired with Comco's wonderful vinyl pants, their diapers (delivered in a gaudily decorated diaper service truck) provided excellent daytime coverage, but needed to be reinforced with baby diaper stuffers at night (this was common to my diaper experience from all these services). There are excellent cloth diapers available for purchase as we speak. I have never had to use stuffers with the Baby Pants product at night, and there are many quality products in the marketplace for daytime wear. However, unless you are a stay at home, disposable are a more practical answer for daytime use.

Pre-toilet training toddlers are the golden age. You can move, you can talk, nobody expects anything out of you. It's all downhill once you start toilet training and have to got school, and work, and whatever...

That's a bit unfortunate for your plans but honestly, that sounds like standard business practice. I'm not aware of any company for any product or service that will discount the higher cost item/service. The order of selection doesn't matter.

When totallity hit here, tons of people were setting off fireworks and firecrackers, then the sun started coming back out and the geese were going crazy, I would be pissed too if I only had 5 mins of sleep lol.

Part 37 It took Cassidy what felt like forever to find Audrey’s car. Since Audrey had been the one who drove, Cassidy had only been paying so much attention when they had parked. Although sharing the responsibility of keeping track of the spot was what most people would do, Cassidy had been a bit distracted earlier by the fairy costume she was wearing. Particularly the wings, both on the drive over where her careful posture was concerned, as well as the effort it took to get out of the car when they arrived. Now she was wishing for the leotard and wings back, as that would be a considerable upgrade to her current getup. The longer they circled the parking lot, the more uncomfortable her diapers felt. While there weren’t really any people around to see her bulky underwear that was blatantly on display, Cassidy was longing for a shower and some clean underwear. Every step in the sagging padding was a fresh reminder of the mess she had made, and all because a thirteen year old girl coerced her to. At some point, Cassidy asked if Audrey remembered where they had parked, or if she could use the lock button on the keys to give them a direction. Audrey just dismissively waved her off, insisting that this built character. Also, they would both still be at the faire right now if Cassidy had just behaved and stood up for herself. Instead, she let herself get bullied and bossed around by a small group of middle schoolers. “If you’re going to act like an immature twelve year old, you’re going to be treated like one.” With that, Audrey gave a firm slap to Cassidy’s padded rear and told her to keep moving. Cassidy eventually spotted Audrey’s car in a vaguely familiar area. However, her sister wasn’t quite done having fun at her expense. Instead of unlocking it right away, she smirked and held out her hand. “I need your top, Cassie. It’ll be easier if I put it with the rest of the stuff I bought.” As badly as Cassidy wanted to be safely in the car and out of sight, as well as on the way home, she didn’t love that suggestion. Obviously. It was the only thing keeping her chest covered. Of course, there was no fighting Audrey at this point. It was impossible to combat her ‘logic’ when Cassidy was so busy worrying about everything else at the same time. After a bit of back and forth, Cassidy reluctantly unwrapped the top and immediately cupped her breasts when Audrey pulled the pink fabric away. Once Audrey had put her collection from the various shops in the trunk, she opened one of the rear doors for Cassidy. “Diapered little girls sit in the back!” she proclaimed, “What are you waiting for, Cassie? Get in.” Cassidy was far less inclined to argue this time around. There were a couple others in the makeshift field parking lot, either arriving late or leaving early, and she was nearly naked in broad daylight all over again. Without wasting any time, she climbed into the back seat. Unfortunately, her focus on getting out of sight and closer to her goal of getting home temporarily made her forget about the mortifying complications that came with wearing diapers. Cassidy gasped as she sat right in the mess. It was so gross, and a completely different kind of discomfort than walking around in the used padding. “Comfortable?” Audrey giggled. Without missing a beat, she reached over and grabbed the seat belt. Her boobs were right in Cassidy’s face for a second, and more pronounced than usual in the corset. Thankfully for Cassidy, the awkwardness didn’t last too long. Audrey was quick to pull the seat belt over the topless girl’s torso and click it into place. “There you go,” she said, “Honestly, sis, I’ve been wanting to give you a girly makeover for years. If I knew you would make it this easy, I would have done it forever ago!” Of course, the initial concept had been more about leaning into Cassidy’s petite frame. Diapers had never been on her radar, but it was certainly an amusing turn now that it had happened. “Now, how about a smile?” In a flash, Audrey stepped back and snapped a picture. Finally finding her voice after the series of awkward/uncomfortable moments, Cassidy exclaimed, “No!” But it was way too late. While her boobs were still very much covered by her hands, the diapers and the rest of her bare body were perfectly captured on camera. “Cute,” Audrey said. She glanced at the photo for a moment with an idle smile on her face, “It’s actually better without a smile. You look so shy and adorable. Now, just one last thing. I want you to apologize for being such a difficult little girl all day.” That gave Cassidy pause. Because it was SO backwards. If anything, Audrey should be apologizing to Cassidy for putting her through all this. Expecting an apology was beyond insulting and, even though Cassidy wanted nothing more than for this humiliating day to be over, she protested the latest request. “No!” she objected, although her voice wasn’t quite as stern as she was aiming for. It was difficult to be the older sister under her current circumstances. “This was all your fault, Audrey. Not mine!” Audrey just scoffed. “Really? So, remind me . . . why am I the reason you’re sitting in shitty diapers?” “Because- because . . .” Cassidy hesitated. It was impossible to put it into words. Audrey had done plenty, and implied/admitted multiple times that her intention had been to embarrass her sister. The costume. The delay that led to Cassidy wetting herself. Putting her into daycare, which then snowballed into everything else. But trying to put all that into a cohesive string of thoughts while offsetting the blame for herself at the same time was a difficult task to achieve at the drop of a dime. “I’ll make it easy for you,” Audrey said, when Cassidy failed to come up with a good answer right away, “Give me a proper apology, and I’ll keep this picture to myself. Fair?” It was the perfect thing to put Cassidy back into cooperative mode. While Audrey had come up with a way to mitigate Quinn’s blackmail, that didn’t fully save her. Cassidy was still in diapers, and Audrey had the evidence to back it up. Keeping all this from the world outside the faire was still a huge priority. “Fine. I’m sorry,” she muttered. “I said a proper apology, Cassie,” Audrey replied, “How about you start with the multiple accidents you’ve had in your diapers?” Cassidy actually would have preferred the ridiculous apology she made to Quinn and company. Hiding her boobs was a less embarrassing transgression than having a daytime ‘accident’ at her age. Still, it felt like she didn’t have any other choice. “I’m sorry for the multiple accidents,” Cassidy reluctantly said. After Audrey corrected her, she clarified with, “I’m sorry for having multiple accidents in my diapers.” Satisfied, Audrey gave a small nod. “And how you’ve been acting like an immature little girl all day long?” “I’m sorry for acting like an immature little girl all day long,” Cassidy echoed. Trying her very best to stay in older sister mode, she figured it was easier to repeat the apology word for word to make it mean less. “Glad you’re finally owning up to it,” Audrey replied, “Now, can you manage the whole thing? Or is your memory as weak as your bladder?” Cassidy blushed, but she reluctantly said what Audrey was asking of her. ------------------------ Check out my website: www.ladyluciastories.com And my SubscribeStar: https://subscribestar.adult/lady-lucia

@~Brian~ Just don't ever accidentally install the stock alpine package with apt-get. You would destroy the binary files you moved into /usr/bin. Links instead of moving may have been a better choice in case of an accidental package installation of alpine....

I'm 78, and have been incontinent since birth due to a spinal cord birth defect. I have been counselling people in my community about incontinence for more than fifteen years, both informally and through outreach programs. ADHB has gone to the heart of it. On this site, threads over and over again discuss the definition of incontinence, and the variations (overflow, stress, urge, etc.), but there are more fundamental issues. When dealing with the incontinent community, people on sites like this who are not incontinent need to be aware of the DABDA imperative. We associate this with cancer (Denial / Anger / Bargaining / Depression / Acceptance), but it applies in a very direct way to those rendered incontinent by injury or illness. I'm lucky, in the sense that being a lifelong incontinent I do not have to "unlearn" the continence lifestyle. But this is exactly what happens to people who progress from diapers to pull-ups to underpants/panties. Suddenly, everything that has applied to your daily life since early childhood is swept away, and you have to "unlearn" to clear the decks for "learning" to live with a disability that may be with you 24/7/365 until death. The emotional toll on one's self-esteem can be as devastating as the physical. So, when you go on a site devoted to incontinence, you should expect that individuals at different points on the DABDA scale on going to react to your comments differently. Someone who has been in diapers for ten years has probably run the whole scale, but someone who has been at it for six months has not. So, be patient, and above all don't be too quick to draw conclusions from the feedback your comments receive.

Chapter 1: “Abby, is this really necessary?” A whine sounded from her throat. Dani crossed her arms over her chest, pouting at the ceiling as her legs were held up by the ankles. A warm wipe made its way over her nether regions, cleansing every inch of her dirty bottom and between her legs. “Yes, Dani, this is necessary. It’s necessary when you willfully disregard all instructions not to eat gluten. Really, Dani, what were you thinking?” her voice was firm, not angry, but the disappointment was clear. She’d only had a tiny bite of cake left on the counter and it was only too tempting dipping her finger into the frosting and biting into the yummy sweetness. The doctor said she had Celiac disease but Dani hadn’t believed a word they said. These Amazon’s were on a power trip and the only thing the doctor believed she should be having was milk straight from an Amazon’s tit. But now her tummy ached and the messy explosion down below was the result. Abby stared down at her with the same condescending look given to all Littles trying to prove they were bigger than they actually were. “Just because you are a Little does not mean we are all out to get you. Believe it or not, Doctor Heany actually wanted to help you. This is all your own fault, Daniella. You have no reason to be upset.” Okay, she did have a point, the Little reluctantly agreed. But, that didn’t mean she had to diaper her! Dani squirmed, wiggling around on the table as the Amazon woman reached down below, pulling out the thick padding. “NO!” She cried out, anxious to get away from the monstrous article of clothing, if it could even be called that. Dani knew she had been extremely lucky the past several years. The apartment building she used to live in decided they’d no longer accommodate unadopted Little’s after her neighbor had left the sink faucet running and fell asleep which resulted in the flooding of the entire apartment. The damage wasn’t extreme but the Landlord was not pleased. The Little was adopted not even a day later and the Landlord refused to rent to Little’s any longer. It wasn’t that Dani didn’t understand the Landlord’s frustrations but everything in this world was Amazon size, meant for those eight feet and taller. They had step stools and ladders and accommodations were made for the regressed but the average unadopted Little hardly stood a chance, especially when they couldn’t even reach a sink faucet - a task that would be simple if she wasn’t so short. And she’d gotten lucky, finding an Amazon that would even rent to her in the first place because most places wouldn’t even entertain the thought. A Little pretending to be an adult, no more mature than a toddler, yeah that’ll go well… Knowing she was about to be booted out on the street, tears welled up in her eyes. She was the prime candidate for any Amazon. They just couldn’t ignore their parental instincts, seeing a Little in distress (or any Little in general). The urge to smother them with “love” back into diapers and turn their brains to mush was too strong. But Abby wasn’t like the other Amazon’s - not really, well, kind of - she was different. Abby had saved her. But it’s not how she saw it at the time. Dani had been arguing with the Landlord, a grumpy ten foot tall man who never had time for Little’s and their whims (as he liked to put it) about just needing another day or two to move out her stuff. Her best friend said she could stay with her for a while until she was sorted. But she had too much stuff to move in twenty-four hours coupled with the fact there were about fifty other Little’s moving out the same day, it was an impossible task they were meant to fail at. Look at all the Littles, too immature to follow directions correctly. Too tiny to even lift and carry out all their items. That is why instead of them doing the carrying, they need to be carried by a big and strong Amazon. He’d all but laughed in her face as she continued to argue her case, not only for herself but other fellow Littles. However, it wasn’t until after, she’d realized she’d gone a bit too far. “I’m half tempted to call the adoption center!” The man exclaimed. “Not even able to follow proper instructions, disrespectful and talking back? This is a serious case of Maturosis.” Oh god. Her heart had dropped to the bottom of her stomach, unable to do anything as she watched him pull out her phone. “Please!” She pleaded. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry-” “What’s going on here?” They’d both turned around at the sound of the voice. An Amazon, one of the tallest she’d ever seen, came strutting over across the lobby. The woman must have been about thirteen feet and that was tall for Amazon standards. Unconsciously, she backed up, eager to be rid of both Giants because while one was worrisome, two was a nightmare. “Miss Brady!” The man’s voice turned jovial at the site of his fellow Amazon. “Nothing to worry about here. Just the standard case of Maturosis, I’m dialing the adoption center as we speak.” Tears poured down her cheeks and the Amazon stared down at her, blue eyes shining with an expression she couldn’t make out. The Amazon was beautiful and blonde with curves she could only dream of having. “Oh don’t do that,” the woman smiled, waving her hand. “I’ve been searching for a Little for myself actually! I think Little Miss -“ “Daniella Avery.” Said the man with a Cheshire cat grin as he hung up his phone. “Miss Avery would be absolutely perfect! You don’t have to worry about her apartment. I’ll take it over as well.” The Little didn’t have time to run as she was quickly scooped up and swung over her shoulder. The girl let out what could only be described as a tantrum. Kicking and screaming and pounding on the Amazon’s back, that should have been the end. At twenty-one years old, this should have been the point where her life drastically changed forever and any happiness she contained disappeared. But it wasn’t. Instead, it was quite the opposite. OoOoo Abby won in the end, like always, and could only smile at the pouting Little who couldn’t have been any more adorable in her puffy pink diaper secured tightly around her waist. Honestly, she’d be content making her go out dressed in only that but Abby really didn’t have the energy to deal with the tantrum that would surely ensue. “Why can’t I at least wear a pull-up?” “Do I really need to explain this Dani?” She did not. The Little stayed silent. “You know what we agreed on. Say it.” Her hand landed down on her pale thigh tainted pink, having been slapped one to many times in response to her poor behavior. Dani frowned, rubbing at her wet eyes. “Mommy knows best and Little girls need to learn that their naughty behavior has consequences,” diapers being it. All Abby really required was obedience and a companion to watch over but not regress. The Amazon, unlike most others, did not desire a baby to look after or to be called Mommy or diaper full-time. She wanted a Little she could snuggle up with at the end of the night, a Little that would still maintain their adult mind and could have normal conversations yet acknowledge their place in an Amazon's world. Dani could handle that because her Mommy, for all-intents and purposes, always said, it could be a lot worse. She had freedoms, too many to count and it just came over the small price of being fussed over and treated at the most like a five to six year old. However, the times she was diapered, dressed up in humiliating garb and made to nurse were her own fault. It was her own stupid actions having landed her in this position. Like now. But Dani knew, if she even voiced a desire to be regressed, Abby wouldn’t hesitate. Instincts always won over in the end. “Very good,” Abby smiled, patting her head. “Arms up.” The Little complied, allowing the sparkly blue dress to be slipped over her head ending just past her knees. Abby would’ve had her permanently dressed in pink just like her nursery and about every babyish outfit she owned but seeing a diapered Little in pink and alone in public was a recipe for disaster. Hands under her armpits, she was lifted to the ground. Her legs wobbled attempting to catch her balance having been on her backside for way too long. Her head didn’t even reach halfway up to the changing table just like every other item in Amazonia and while Dani was proud to be Little, she wished she were just a few feet taller. Only at 4’8, she was short even for Little standards which made her even more delectable to the Amazons and absolutely impossible to be taken seriously, more so than her fellow Littles. Now, Abby hummed a tune, something familiar from her childhood as they stood at the mirror, brushing her red curls back into a low ponytail. “All my friends are going to see that I’m wearing a diaper,” Dani sulked looking down at the ground because she couldn’t bear to stare at her own reflection. “You don’t have to play with your friends. We can always stay here and have a Baby day. We can watch your favorite movie and cuddle and have bathtime. I know how much you love bubbles.” Her cheeks turn pink at every word, worse than the last. Dani was mortified to admit how much she actually enjoyed herself during those times. It was maybe only a year after she’d been adopted that she truly let herself relax and indulge in the lack of responsibilities, realizing she wouldn’t be taken advantage of. Being taken care of for once instead of having to worry about her every little move, was a nice change. Still, Dani couldn’t help but feel guilty, knowing this was exactly what so many Little’s were fighting against, what she had fought against, and here she was enjoying it. Even now, Dani wouldn’t mind a cozy day in her favorite fuzzy pajamas. But the Little knew it was more of a punishment and there was no fun in being reminded of how stupid she’d been. “What if they say something? What if they laugh at me?” “Then they are not your friends.” Finished tying the black ribbon at the top of her hair, she was lifted into her arms. “My tummy doesn’t hurt anymore though. I don’t need a diaper, really. I’ll be fine.” “But we can’t be sure, can we?” The woman gave her a look. “Besides, you don’t have to go to your friend's house at all but I know how much you were looking forward to the, what was it… bachelorette party?” No! She couldn’t miss it! Her bottom lip slipped between her teeth as she carefully considered her next words. Abby would keep her home if she really wanted too. She didn’t even have to let her keep seeing her friends and that’s what Dani appreciated the most. But like everyone, the Amazon had her limits and Dani was inching dangerously close to crossing the line. “You’re right.” The Little finally muttered in defeat. There was no arguing her way out of this one. “Of course I am!” She bounced her in her arms. “Mommy is always right!” OoOoo It was a sunny August day as they made their way outside from the third floor and out onto the busy street. Surprisingly, Dani had no fight as she was strapped into the pink stroller (which was always a problem). Abby watched as she laid her head back, soaking up the sun and her eyes closed. A hint of a smile appeared on her lips at the very visible sight of the puffiness beneath her dress, pulled up by the strap between her thighs. She’d fussed at the frilly white socks and Mary Jane’s but really, it was the least of her concerns. Even just the tiniest argument allowed her to maintain her sanity, showing that she still had a voice to fight back against her imprisonment. She closed her eyes as to not see all the cooing Amazon’s, pretending she was somewhere on a warm island sipping a Mimosa and not stuck in this horrible contraption they called a stroller. It was a quick walk, about twenty minutes away yet it couldn’t have felt shorter as they came to a stop in front of the five story building. Tucked away in a quiet neighborhood, the area was predominantly occupied by Littles and Inbetweeners, not quite as big as Amazons but still tall enough that they were ignored by the Amazons. “Here we are!” Abby chirped. Leaning down to undo all the belts, Dani didn’t hesitate to hop out, seeing that they were alone on the street. “Here is your phone and gift for your friend,” she reached down into the bottom pocket of the stroller. “Are you fine to go in on your own?” “Yes!” Dani said eagerly, grabbing the wrapped present and tiny flip phone. The last thing she needed was her friends seeing her Mommy walking her inside like a baby. “Very well. Do you remember our rules?” Abby bent down, taking her chin in her hand so she couldn’t look away. “Yes,” she sighed. “No drinking, no dirty behavior and no boys.” Dani struggled not to roll her eyes. It was the tiny restrictions like this that got her the most fed up. She was twenty-one years old for crying out loud and the girl had needs! “I will be back at six pm but text me if you need me beforehand or want to come home early. I will be here in a jiffy.” “Six?” Dani sputtered, doing her best not to stomp her foot. “That’s only five hours! The party is going on all night -!” “Daniella!” She said sharply. “I’ve been very patient all morning with your little fits. Do you want me to make it shorter? Do you want to go at all? We can turn around right now and go back home. We could also go upstairs and spank your little bottom in front of all of your friends.” A dark look had settled over her eyes, warning she was on her last straw. “B-but,” tears just about welled up in her eyes. “I hardly see Carly and it’s her most special day! Can I stay until ten at least? Pleaseeee?” “Absolutely not. Six o’clock.” “What about nine?” Abby paused, seemingly considering her words. After a pregnant pause she said, “eight o’clock.” “Eight-forty five-“ “Daniella…” her hand warningly grasped her bottom. “Fine.” She relented. “Eight o’clock.” The Amazon sighed. “That’s your bedtime so I don't want any whiny girl later on and don’t even try to argue for overnight since there is no adult present.” “Thankyouthankyouthankyou! I’ll be good!” Dani couldn’t help but squeal, knowing this was the best she was gonna get. Attacking Abby with a hug to the neck and a thousand kisses to the cheek, really she was grateful. How sad was that… happy for just another two hours… oh how much she’d fallen. Her reaction was adorable, melting the Amazon’s heart because all she wanted was for her Little girl to be happy. She didn’t want to leave her alone with a bunch of other Little’s, especially with the very grown up behaviors they still presented, but it was a necessary sacrifice if she didn’t want Dani to despise her forever. Unlike other Amazon’s, she actually cared how her Little felt which was not a popular sentiment. “Now run along,” she sighed, disentangling her arms and patting her bottom. “You don’t want to be late.” OoOoo The receptionist knew her by now, a kind Inbetweener who really didn’t care if she was Little or not just as long as no trouble was caused. She said hello, practically skipping towards the elevator that for once was placed at the right height so she could press the button. The only reason Dani hadn’t moved in here was because the complex had reached their quota for Little’s allowed. Only thirty-five percent could be occupied by Little’s in order to accommodate the Inbetweeners so they wouldn’t feel upstaged. Not that it really mattered in the end, but still, it made her pissy just thinking about the stupid rule. It was a quick ride up to the fourth floor and the party was already in full swing. “Dani!” Squeals broke out throughout the room as she walked through the unlocked door. She was embraced with hugs from her already tipsy friends, not only drunk on happiness. “Congratulations!” She exclaimed finally seeing the blonde bombshell of her best friend. She embraced the bride to be in a short white dress meant to show off her boobs and ass in the best way possible. Abby would have a stroke if she saw what she was wearing right now. Dani couldn’t help but think. “Wha-what are you wearing?” Carly stepped back, finally taking in her appearance. Her face heated up, realizing all eyes were on her and the room had gone quiet. It wasn’t a secret that she was adopted but it was embarrassing knowing she was different from everyone else. Sometimes, the energy was just off. There was them and then there was her. It was almost as if they were weary of her, as if her Littleness would rub off on them somehow. They were still her friends, nothing would change that, but these days she felt even more insecure. “Abby.” Is all she said. Hums of realization went around the living room. “I’ve got clothes and makeup in my room,” said Carly. “Go change and for fucks sake, take off the diaper. No Amazon is ruining our night.” Oh, she didn’t have to say that twice! A smile lit up her face as the energy resumed and she rushed off. A few minutes later, there are large exaggerated bangs on the bedroom door. “Knock knock knock! Open up bitch!” Olivia. She smirked. “I’m naked!” “Even better!” The door opened to reveal the girl who had been with her through thick and thin. The girl who’d contemplated begging Abby to adopt her just so they could remain together before Dani had told her what a stupid ridiculous idea that was. But that’s who Olivia was. Crass, confident and unequivocally lovable. Her caramel skin positively glowed, hair pulled up in a crown of long braids in a short midnight black dress and don’t even get her started on her long tanned legs. She’d always been the hot girl in college. The one all the boys chased after and every other girl wanted to be. “You look hot. Is that a new brand of diapers? Gucci? I heard they’re making them extra absorbent nowadays.” “Oh shut up!” They collapse into a fit of laughter, jumping on their friend’s queen size bed. Olivia was the one person she didn’t need to hide around, the one person who could turn any awkward situation into a joke and who didn’t really seem to care about her new status in life. “Help me choose an outfit before they start wondering where we are. Jesus, she’s got so many clothes.” She walks to the closet, pulling out a blood red corset dress with a dangerous slit up the side. “Too slutty?” Oliva’s brows wiggled in a suggestive manner. “Not enough!” “Perhaps, we should consult with Mommy dearest. I wonder, does she have any matching red diapers?” “Don’t give her ideas,” Dani shuttered at the thought. “Now help me into that thing and do my makeup. I want to look our age for once.” OoOoo Bachelorette parties were supposed to be sweet and wholesome, celebrating the start of a new chapter in the woman’s life. For Carly, there would be none of that cutesy crap. As Littles they already dealt with it enough. Early marriage wasn’t uncommon for Littles in Amazonia because one day you could be free and the next day stuck in a crib. You never knew how much time you had. Dani hadn’t even gotten to the point of finding a boyfriend before being adopted and the thought of marriage was a faraway dream. That’s why she couldn’t have been any more happy for her friend, getting to live out all of her fantasies. “Are you staying the night?” Olivia asked as she carefully applied her eyeliner. “Until eight.” Dani sighed. “Let me guess, Abby?” “You bet.” She muttered. ”Good thing you’ll be here for the stripper then.” “Stripper!” Dani gasped, eyes flying wide-open. “Shhh!” Olivia put her fingers to her lips. “It’s a surprise. We planned it for Carly. Don’t say anything to her!” “H-how’d you even find one?” “The Underground, duh. How else would we?” It was no surprise that any raunchy, sexual activity including drinking were off limits to Little’s. Anything that threatened the innocence of a Little was outlawed. That’s why there was the Underground. Anything a Little needed could be found there. Alcohol, Lingerie, certain activities… you just needed to know where to look. “We figured you couldn’t stay the night so they’re coming at half six.” Dani was grateful for the thought, yet her face still turned as red as her hair. They shouldn’t have to make decisions like this in the first place or change the plans just to accommodate her. Often she wondered if her presence was more of a hindrance. “Don’t be like that,” Olivia nudged her playfully. “I love you. Carly loves you. We all love you. Let loose, have some fun before you go back to baby jail. Perhaps you’ll just meet the love of your life.” Dani barked a laugh. Imagine. A stripper and a diapered Little. That would make one hell of a story. OoOoo A/N: Hey all! I know it’s been such a long time since I’ve posted but I’ve been so busy with school. I’m coming up on my last year of college, I’m in the middle of an internship and getting ready for Masters programs so literally I’ve had no time for anything else! I just wanted to post a little something because I need a break from everything. I know that I have so many stories going on but when something pops in my head, I’ve got write it down! I’ve got about one hundred drafts of different stories written but I’m still working on Baby Dolls and whatever else is posted right now. I’m not really sure how long this story will be but please stick with me! This is my first time writing a diaper dimension story so please share your thoughts and as always, I love reviews! Also, I had no clue what to title this so any better suggestions are welcome!!!

Remember visiting Nanny Betty and Aunt Amy. Both absolutely amazing.

I think @DAQordered 2 cases of diapers, and added the much cheaper boosters as a third item. The computer then applied the discount to the boosters, not the second case of diapers.

Indeed, I've used fanny packs with a single diaper and some wipes for things like going into ball games (minor league where they aren't too security concerned). The odd ones are the pro football games where I have to use the clear bag.

Also fairly new to bedwetting, about three months in to the journey. Not reliable every night, but I’m now at a place where if I drink(adult beverage ) before bed I simply know I will wake with a wet diaper.

@diapijay: How is your washer / dryer in the RV working out for you?

It's a solid story! I can see you wrapping it up very quickly if you need to. But closure is always nice.

This article in a UK paper has some ideas. Pity they didn't suggest going back into nappies and enjoying a good night's bedwetting ... https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2024/mar/11/keeping-waking-in-the-middle-of-the-night-to-pee-heres-why-and-what-to-do-about-it

Toddlers are self propelled and get into more trouble 😄😁😆

I can hardly believe it.....it's already April 1st! Well happy April 1st everyone.

No time wasted at all, I appreciate your reply! Especially since it was someone you'd already been seeing about other, general goings-on. What a relief it must've been when they turned out to be supportive. Traveling is my main "concern" in terms of logistics by a large margin. I've done a couple weekend trips where it was easy to pack some diapers, a cover, etc, but at the time I was only wearing at night. While my current job doesn't often have me traveling with colleagues, it's not out of the question with conventions... do you have any tips or tricks which you found helped navigate keeping your diapers private? That's an interesting facet I would not have thought of (the political capital part), so I appreciate you sharing it. The latter part of that paragraph certainly conjures an image that's easy to apply in my own life (or at least imagine it applying down the line). Do you find the undermining of your gravitas/dignity weighs negatively on your overall experience in diapers (despite not having any desire to change that)? Are there any circumstances that make you question or reflect on your decision to go down this road? What helps you remain positive and self-assured? I'm only a handful of weeks back in 24/7, but my brain keeps circling in a whirlpool of "what ifs" and other unhelpful thoughts, the positives and reasons which support treading this padded path as beneficial to my mental health having difficulty staying afloat or heard through the maelstrom. One would think I'd learned after all the years I've tried denying this part of me. Boy, do a bunch of lines here feel familiar. "Do I want to shut off this side of me or accept it" followed by the former option clearly not working (yet somehow my brain still serves it up as a viable option). I also get intense anxiety and shame over the fact I like this and want to just embrace it, which of course isn't super helpful lol. I'm working on this aspect as well, but it's far from easy. I appreciate you sharing!

So if Hannah is already wearing pull ups during the day and Emma is suggesting that she should be on diapers, does that mean that the diapers that were referenced for night time are actual diapers as opposed to pull ups?

https://dailydiapers.com/content/photos/updated_regularly/a003.html Been searching but can't seem to find it.

Toddler. They can do more, they have some agency, they are starting to be aware of themselves and they can be a bit self-conscious about wearing diapers, which is me!

I enjoyed a look into the background a lot. It makes understanding what’s going on in their heads a little clearer. I am looking forward to getting back into the meat of the story again now that we know a little more.

Omg that's a great backstory. I'm surprised her mother didn't spank the first nanny before firing her. Probably would have done more if she had found out about baby time. Omg I'm dying to know who this woman is watching her in her crib. It is either the maid or the new nanny, or one that's not technically new, but has been the household nanny for years, was probably Max's nanny. I can't wait to see what happens next.

Sitting on the sofa watching TV in just tshirt, nappy, fluffy soft socks and a blanket over me

Thanks! For this one, I definitely wanted to explore the idea of what it would be like if ABDL influencers became famous. And since I am a twin myself, I understand the connection that I have with my twin brother. Chapter 2 on the way! Chapter 2 : Accidents Happen! I hurry down the terminal of Cleveland Hopkins International Airport, trying to keep up with my twin sister Jennifer. I could smell the hairspray and noted her attire: a white dress shirt with a black skirt suit that was “V”d right at her midsection. The black skirt suit and the white dress shirt above the “V” complemented each other well. That, and she had matching black leather shoes to complete the look. Her brown hair was down and it went down to her shoulders. My hair was just a little longer than hers. But getting back to her suit, just wow. I think that just her outfit cost at least a third of my rent! And speaking of that, I’m sure you are all going to ask me. “Jillian, you’re at the airport. What about your sister picking you up, paying the rent, and all of that?” I guess that we can briefly go back, but remember. This is my story. We can touch on these details but let’s get to the good stuff already! To briefly recap, my sister picks me up in a blue Ford Focus around 1:00 in the afternoon. It was a rental, since she drove from the airport. She brought a large luggage bag for me to fill with my belongings. I stuffed some clothes, my cheap laptop, and some toiletries. Jen told me that she had the rest at her apartment, and we could always buy more later. I then say goodbye to my roommate Natasha and my sister takes me to the landlady’s office. I come in and give her the $950 for the month and tell her that I’m moving out before next month. She tells me that the early termination fee is $3,800, but only $1,900 if Natasha moves out early (since she would be paying the same fee). My twin nods, telling her that the fee would be no problem, and that it would be paid in 2-3 weeks, when we return to pick up all of my stuff. With the rent all taken care of, my sister drives me to Cleveland Hopkins International Airport. Having that said, we are now all caught up! (Yay!) I hurry to keep up with my sister. I feel like I’m out of shape, as she is outdistancing me at just her normal pace! “Jen, our flight is not until 5:30!” I finally shouted. “What’s the hurry?” Jen nodded, and reduced her pace. “I’m sorry, Jill but that’s my normal pace! Would you like to try Pilates with me tomorrow morning? I do them almost everyday. I have seen amazing results on my body…” I sigh, staring at my twin sister’s beautiful body. “I don’t exercise…” “Well that explains everything then!” Jen told me. “The invitation is still open tomorrow morning for you to do Pilates with me, if you want to try it.” I smile, as I gave it some thought. “Yeah. Sure…” I said. “How many things do we really get to do together anymore?” “Wonderful!” Jen said as she smiled at me. “I will wake you up tomorrow morning and I’ll walk you through my routine.” She glanced around the airport. I’m guessing that she’s looking for a place to eat, as my stomach is now growling. Right on cue. We both turned onto the B-wing. We checked my bag in that my sister brought for me, so I had just my purse as a carry-on item. Jen also had her purse. We approached the gate that had the non-stop flight to Philadelphia: gate B6. Nearby was a Subway, which really started to sound good. Jen also saw the Subway and glanced at me. “Would you like to eat at Subway? Don’t worry about paying for it. I’m buying.” I nodded, and put my $100 that Natasha gave me back in my front pocket. “Thanks sis…” My twin sister smiled and nodded as we got in line. I ordered an Italian BMT with extra mustard. My sister ordered a Veggie Delite as a salad, with light ranch dressing. I get my Coca Cola and my twin gets her water. We take our food, grab a table, and sit down. I grin, and decide to ruthlessly critique my sister’s choice of food from Subway. “So, are you vegan?” I asked her. Jen shook her head. “No. I just try to reduce the amount of meat that I eat. I usually have a little bit around dinnertime.” “Fair enough!” I take a generous bite out of my Italian BMT and can taste the intense mustardy goodness between my teeth. “So, what about work? Aren’t you supposed to work today?” “I took the day off, Jill.” She told me. “I have plenty of vacation days to use. It was no problem.” I then thought about my fruitless job search again. “Are you sure that there are more woman anchors out there?” I watched my sister nod very confidently. “I’m positive, Jilly Bean! While I was flying out, I did some research of job prospects for news anchors around Cleveland versus news anchors around Philadelphia. From the research, there are more woman anchors the further east you go. I’m so glad that I got you out of Cleveland. You are going to stay with me and you WILL find a job!” I smiled when I heard “Jilly Bean”. “Jilly Bean…” I repeated with a smile. “It’s funny that you’re starting to call me that all of a sudden. I believe that the last time you called me that was when we were in elementary school.” Jen gasped. “Has it really been that long?” My smirk turned into laughter. “Yup! And I think I called you ‘Jenny Penny’!” Jen finished swallowing a mouthful of her Veggie Delite salad and laughed. “You did! I remember! And you know what? The name fit me perfectly! I always loved math in school.” “I didn’t” I argued. “I hated math. I still got good grades, but loved Science and English the best. I especially liked speech class…” Jen nodded. “And for one of your speech projects, you were a news anchor!” “Yeah!” I shouted. “That’s why I wanted to be an anchor! I was always good at speaking…” We both laughed and continued talking. We finished our lunches and continued talking about later plans after I got back to Philadelphia with my sister. One idea that she had was to take me to this nice restaurant that she went to with her coworkers. I guess that’s fine. Just as long as I don’t have to pay for it. I’m broke, remember? Before we knew it, it was time to board the non-stop Delta flight from Cleveland to Philadelphia. The departure time was at 5:30 PM with an arrival time of 6:50 PM in Philadelphia. We both boarded the flight and the plane took off. Before I knew it, the plane made its landing in Philadelphia. From this point on, this city would be my new home, and hopefully where I can find a fresh start. Cleveland didn’t offer me that so I’m hoping that I can have more luck here. Besides, since we were so close to New York City, it seemed like we were in an endless city no matter which direction we were going. There was DC and Baltimore to the south and the Big Apple to the north. With that many people near Philly, I should be a shoo in for that anchor position! My sister and I got off the plane and walked down the air-bridge leading to Terminal D of Philadelphia International Airport. No sooner than we left gate D5 that Jen’s phone started to ring. It played some music that sounded like it was from a video game. “What song is that?” I asked my sister. “Bob Omb Battlefield!” Jen shouted. “It’s Joey!” “Bob Omb…what?” I said in confusion. “And who’s Joey?” “My boyfriend!” Jen exclaimed with ecstasy. “Here. Let me get this…hello? Yeah. I just arrived at Philadelphia with my sister. Was there something that you needed, honey? Oh? Yeah. I want to spend some time with my sister for a while. We can do something special another night. So were you able to review all that for Apple? You did? Good. Apple is rife with financials, so we want to get every detail right for them…What? You found a mistake? Did you tell their finance department? You did? Good. Have I played any more video games? That’s a silly question. You know where I was all day. Helping my twin sister. Yeah. I told you about her. She’s kind of in a difficult position at this moment. No. It’s not a short time. My sister is going to live with me now. Yeah. It’s permanent. What? We can still go on dates and have our private time. You want to come and eat dinner with us? Okay. I’ll make it official then. You are cordially invited to dine with me and my twin sister at the Capital Grille! What? Play it later, Joey! Your video games can wait! What one is it? Tears of the Kingdom? Yeah. The sensible option would be to save it for later and have a delicious dinner with me and my sister. You’re going to do it? Good Joey! I love you. Get reservations for the three of us. The Capital Grille fills up pretty fast at dinner time so hurry. You’re getting them now? Thank you. My sister and I are going back home to drop off her things and get changed. Yes you need nice clothes! This is the Capital Grille, Joey! Not McDonald's! I need to let you go. I need to go with my sister to pick up her luggage at the baggage claim. Mario Karting? Yeah. We can play more this weekend! Call me back when you get the reservation! Love you too! XOXO!” Now filled to the brim with impatience, I watched my sister end her phone call with her oh so wonderful boyfriend. Seriously sis, I don’t know how you did it. To be honest, I have never had a REAL date in my life. Just some ugly admirer that I didn’t like back. He was a Poindexter that only spoke nerdese. I think I look beautiful! Do I really just attract the losers? Now, if my sister could answer that video game question. “What is Bob Omb Battlefield?” I impatiently asked for the second time. My twin sister looked back at me with a smile that was sweeter than an Oreo Cookie (the Double Stuf kind, of course!). “Oh! It’s a song from the video game Super Mario 64! There’s a level called Bob Omb Battlefield and it plays that song there.” “Um, Jen?” I said, looking confused. “Since when were you into video games?” “Jill, I started getting into video games when I met my boyfriend Joey. He loves them so we play all the time. At first I was doing it for his sake but I kind of like playing them now.” I looked at her and sighed. My envy was greener than grass on a hot summer day. “So why did you invite your boyfriend to have dinner with us?” Jen looked at me and sighed. “What is your problem, Jill? I love Joey and this is the kind of life that I have here in Philadelphia. Now I can tell that you have some feelings of jealousy toward my boyfriend. If you want to get a man, make yourself available, Jill. Get out. Join clubs. Go to bars. Meet people. I know that I’m your twin sister but I can’t do that for you. I can help you and support you but you need to find the relationships yourself, okay?” I nodded and hugged my sister, as tears began flowing out of my eyes. “I just…want what you already have…A job…a boyfriend…and plenty of money..!” I then thought of my college debt. “Oh, and for my college debt to be paid off too!” Jen hugged me back and turned my face toward hers. “You will get those things in due time, As a sister that loves you very much, I know you, Jill. You are a sweet and kind person. You have a lot of needs right now, but we’re going to work on them. You’re going to like my boyfriend. He’s a pretty neat guy. We’ll help you meet some new friends here, okay?” “Thank you!” I tried to stop crying as we approached the baggage claim. My luggage bag just came out so we had to run towards it. Jen was just ahead of me so she grabbed it. “Got it!” she shouted. “Let’s go home and I’ll show you my place.” I followed my sister to an elevator that took us to the airport parking. We walked up to a white Mercedes-Benz and then stopped. I gave my sister a frown. “Um, Jen? Aren’t we going to your car?” Jen got out the key fob and unlocked the luxury sedan. “This is my car, Jill. An AMG S 63 E Performance S-Class Mercedes-Benz with the full package. I just bought it brand new last month. Don’t worry. I still kept our old car…” I opened the passenger door while Jen placed my luggage in the back seat. I freaked out at just how posh and luxurious the interior looked. Red leather on the seats. And various controls that did who knows what. I felt like I was in the cockpit of an airplane, not a car. Jen sat down and buckled her seatbelt. “Buckle up, Jill!” She reminded me. I buckled up and stared at my sister, my jaw still flat on the floor from taking in the interior of this spaceship…I mean, car. “Jen, this is amazing! How can you afford this?” Jen turned toward me and smiled. “I just got a bonus last month. A little early, but they told me that I was doing a rather stellar job.” I nodded and stared at my sister. Well, even if I was a news anchor, I would not be able to afford a car like that. Why I would have to work at a syndicated 24-hour cable news channel to afford a car like this! My sister took us back home to her swanky apartment in downtown Philadelphia. It took almost a half hour for us to drive to her place from the airport. Just as she was entering downtown Philadelphia, the Bob Omb Battlefield music played again. Joey again. Does he really need to call? “Assistant, answer call!” Jen ordered. I then heard Joey’s voice for the first time. “Hey baby!” Joey shouted. “Where are you?” “Joey?” Jen said, sounding nervous. “I’m just entering downtown Philadelphia. The traffic’s very heavy….” Jen made a skillful maneuver, merging into the right exit just in time. That junction led to another highway, with various other downtown exits coming up. “Well, I just wanted to let you know that I got the reservations for the Capital Grille.” “You did?” Jen gasped. “Excellent! I’ll call you back when Jill and I get ready, okay?” “Got it, babe. Reservations are for 8:45 for the three of us. I know it’s kind of late, but we have one more work day until the weekend, right?” “You got it!” Jen said. “I’m just about home. Talk to you a little later! Love you, honey!” “Love you too, JenJen…Bye…” The call ended at 7:42 p.m. If the reservations were for 8:45, we only had an hour. “JenJen?” I said, teasing my twin sister. Jen nodded. “Yes. You’ll understand that better when you have a boyfriend…” Um, okay…I then thought of the reservation. “How are we going to get there in an hour?” My twin sister didn’t look a bit worried about this. “Jill, I live right next to this restaurant. We’re so close that we can walk there! Why did you think I picked this one?” I watched as my sister continued to show off her mad driving skills. We were now in downtown Philadelphia and she was turning onto the street where her apartment was. “Jill, we are going to park in a nearby parking deck.” My sister told me. “Don’t worry. It’s attached to the apartment where I live. Metro City Apartments.” A parking deck? Okay. I guess that’s how they do it here in the city. My sister drove her luxury ride into the parking deck and we kept going upward until we found a vacant spot. “I have annual parking passes for both cars.” Jen explained to me. Each car has a sticker, which the parking deck reads to let us in. I just wanted to let you know.” I nodded as she parked her Mercedes-Benz in a vacant spot. I opened up the back passenger door and got out my luggage. I followed my sister as she locked the Mercedes-Benz and activated the car alarm. Jen took me to some automatic doors, which led to a hallway where a set of four elevators were. We took the first one on our right and entered it. Jen pressed 22 on the panel. The elevator zoomed up to the 22nd floor. The elevator doors opened and Jen guided me to the door to her 3-bedroom apartment. “Twenty-two oh two…” Jen announced. “Home sweet home!” Jen got out her cell phone and loaded a special app that managed the lock for her apartment. After she entered the password, the door unlocked. Amazing. Jen opened the door and guided me into her humble abode. The great room had everything you needed: a living room, a kitchen, and a dining room all rolled into one. Two bedrooms were next to each other with a bathroom nearby. The third bedroom had the bathroom nearby it. “3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms,” Jen announced. “1560 square feet.” She then pointed to one of the almost empty bedrooms and gestured me to come with her. I followed and entered with her. Jen turned on the light switch. “You will be staying here. In the bedroom next to mine. It’s the second largest bedroom and you should have plenty of space in there. I got you a blow-up mattress, but don’t worry. I have every intention to buy you your very own bed. I sleep in a queen-sized bed and I want you to sleep in the same kind that I have. We will be looking at beds this weekend. Joey’s Mario Karting can wait…” I glanced at the time. 8:03. We have about 40 more minutes! My sister, also looking at the clock, nodded. “We need to get ready for the Capital Grille. Now Jill, this is a very fancy place so I’m going to have you wear one of my outfits. We’re both the same height so they should fit you.” “I hope…” I said with a smirk. “I think I weigh a little more than you. I need to stop eating that ice cream…” Jen nodded, as she quickly assembled an outfit that I had to wear to be allowed to eat at this fancy restaurant. It was a silky white gown that fit me okay. I felt weird wearing it since I’m not used to wearing fancy clothes. “Um…” I said, glancing at my sister. “I’m dressed…” Jen nodded, as she finished putting on a gown that looked similar to mine, only it was lavender. “It’s called an evening gown, Jill. It’s what we wear to special events like this.” I laughed. “Since when is eating a special event? It’s just food!” “But this is high society!” Jen explained. “The clothes that you had on before would not be allowed in a place like this. The people that eat at places like this are well to do and make very good wages.” I sighed. “I don’t have a job, so why are you taking me here?” “You’re my guest, so you can eat here!” “But I’m moving here. I’m not just a guest. How much do these yuppies make?” “Excuse me?” Jen said. “So am I a yuppie too? Jill, I am a CPA at a very nice CPA firm. I currently make $148,000 a year. Compared to everyone else that I have seen there, that is pretty low. Now, we need to get going! Your hair looks fine. Let’s just add this…” she got out some perfume and gently sprayed it on both of us. We both left Metro City Apartments at 8:17. From what Jen’s phone told me, it was only going to take 10 minutes to get there. And with reservations being at 8:45, we would still have some time to spare. Sure enough, the phone was right. 10 minutes later, I arrived with my twin sister at the Capital Grille. Just the exterior décor looked very fancy. I stood there very still, not wanting to break anything. A couple minutes later, a man in a tuxedo glanced at my sister and hugged her. “Babe!” It was Joey. Joey looked at me and smiled. “So you’re Jill? Your sister has told me a little bit about you.” “Yup!” I shouted, trying to sound polite. “Things didn’t work out where I was in Cleveland, so my sister took me in.” “Yeah! She told me that. But you know what that means. We have another player for Mario Kart 8 Deluxe!” “Joey!” Jen shouted. “My sister has never touched a video game before. Maybe if she’s interested, we can teach her how to play.” Joey looked at me and smiled. I could tell just how fascinated he was with video games just by his facial expression. “So, do you think that video games is something that you would like to do with us? It’s a lot of fun. Me and my friends play a lot on the weekends. Especially Smash!” Joey then looked at both of us. “Well, I have two lovely ladies that will be having dinner with me tonight…But seriously. These reservations were really hard to get. Because of one cancellation, I was able to get us in.” Jen nodded, as she held out her hand for Joey to take it. “8:32. Let’s see it we can get in early.” Joey grabbed my sister’s hand, and I watched them romantically stroll forward towards the entrance of the restaurant. What a way to single me out and make me feel even more miserable. Am I just going to stay a single pringle? Why did I move in with my sister? All she’s doing is rubbing her relationship in my face! When Joey just saw that I was tailing behind him, he sighed. “Hey,” he told me. “I know you’re new, but I have a lot of friends that I would like you to meet. I can see it, Jill. JenJen gave me the same face when I met her for the first time. That face of loneliness. Of course she didn’t ever want to admit it to me. I still saw it. So I pushed her out of her loneliness.” “And I’m glad that you did!” Jen said, smiling. “You also got me out of my shell! Yes, I was lonely, but work has its place…” “Indeed it does.” Joey said, as we entered the restaurant. “Now Jill…Getting back to my friends. Not all of them have a girlfriend, okay? There’s actually a few that are single. Are you single, Jill? You don’t have any boyfriends back in Cleveland, do you?” I nervously laugh. “Of course not! I’m the kind of girl that scares boys away…” Joey laughed. “I like your humor. Scared? All of my single friends would be strong enough to take on you. Now I don’t want you to feel left out tonight. Both JenJen and I will have our own alone time to do what we want together. This is your night, Jill. We’re here to help you, okay?” I shyly nodded. “Yeah. Thanks…” Jen looked back at him. “While she won’t tell you, I can say that she really appreciates what you’re doing for her.” Bingo! Yeah. I’ll be honest. I feel a little out of place here in this fancy restaurant. Maybe if I felt more comfortable, I would want to talk more? But yeah. Joey has already proved his awesomeness to me. Now introduce me to your single friends. Please! I, Jillian Jenners would really appreciate it! We presented ourselves to the hostess, who told us that our table would be ready in a few more minutes. Everyone in the Capital Grille was dressed up. All the women wore fancy gowns and all the men wore suit coats or tuxedos. What was this, a wedding? Nope. Just some fancypants place where you had to dress up to eat here! And for what it’s worth, the food better be good! After a couple more minutes of waiting, our table was finally ready. To check for accuracy, I looked at my phone. 8:44. One minute early! The hostess summoned a waiter, who also wore a suit. We followed him to our assigned table. At the table, I was impressed. Three menus were all laid there, each in its own assigned spot. All of the silverware and napkins were laid in each spot. Talk about classy! Now I’m hungry! What sounds good? “Good evening everyone.” The waiter announced in a snooty accent. “I am Darian, and I will be taking care of your table tonight. The specials that we have tonight include the following. We have the World-Class Surf and Turf. A fresh 10 ounce cut of Filet Mignon prepared your way with cipollini onions, wild mushrooms, and fig essence perfectly paired with pan-seared sea bass with miso butter. This dish is served on a gridded plate to ensure that there is no cross contamination between the meat and the fish. We are offering this delectable dish at 85 dollars. Our second special is the Tender Lobster Feast. You get our seared tenderloin with butter poached lobster tails and a hearty bowl of lobster bisque. We are offering this delicious dish at 80 dollars. Our final special is the Seafood Trio. With this wonderful selection, you get a slice of our sushi-grade seared sesame tuna, half a slice of pan-seared sea bass with miso butter, and half a slice of seared citrus glazed salmon with marcona almonds and brown butter. That’s two delectable slices of our three best seafood selections and we’re offering it tonight for 90 dollars. I will give you a few minutes to review those specials and the menu and will return for your orders. In the meantime, what would everyone like to drink tonight? If you are uncertain, we have San Pellegrino Sparkling Natural Mineral Water if you won’t be drinking alcohol tonight. Also review our wines. I will return in a few minutes for everyone’s selection.” Darian left and all I could do was gasp. Are you crazy? 90 dollars for a dinner? You could get almost 16 or 17 Big Macs for that! Well, my sister took me here and I don’t have to pay for it, so whatever… Joey nodded as he already had in mind what he wanted to order. “I will be paying for everyone’s dinner tonight.” He announced. “Darian never asked, but I will tell him when he returns. So babe, I was thinking that you and I could split a wine tonight. Normally we get our own, but I’m going to give that honor to Jill tonight. So Jill, get whatever wine you want. Even the most expensive one.” I smiled. “The most expensive one, huh? Well, I don’t drink a lot of wine, so I’m not going to do that.” I glanced at the wines and made my decision. It’s going to be a red wine. How about Walt, Las Brisa, Sonoma Coast? And how about the World-Class Surf and Turf? That’ll be 200 dollars for just me! Joey smiled as he glanced over at my sister. “I know that this is random, but what video game character do you see yourself as? I like to think that I am Tidus and you are Yuna.” Jen frowned. “I don’t know those characters. I guess I see myself as Princess Peach? I don’t know a lot of video games like you…” Joey smiled as he admired his tuxedo. “I haven’t worn this since we visited Amazon. Of course I got it dry-cleaned after the visit!” Jen grinned, as she jabbed Joey in the tie. “You better have!” she said jokingly. She glanced at the menu. “Decide what you want!” And decide we did. Joey announced to Darian that he would be paying for the whole meal, and that he would be sharing a bottle of Chaleur Blanc from DeLille Cellars in Columbia Valley, Washington with Jen. They also got some San Pellegrino Sparkling Natural Mineral Water as they were only sharing a 750 milliliter bottle. For food, Joey ordered the Seafood Trio. My sister Jen ordered the Tender Lobster Feast. I then unloaded the $200 bomb: A World-Class Surf and Turf and a Walt brand Las Brisa red wine from the Sonoma Coast. Darian wrote down all of our orders and nodded. “Very fine selections tonight. I will put these orders in and get them out to you as soon as possible.” I looked at the clock. 9:12. “They better. Doesn’t this place close at 9:00?” Jen nodded. “They do. But they lock the doors at 9:00. They still have to serve every table.” I grinned. “I see. For $200, this better be really good…” Joey laughed. “You’re going to like it, Jill…” The rest of our meal went as follows. Our wines were served to us in five minutes and our dinner was served in another 15. At this point, everything started to blur. I think it was the wine…Amazing stuff it was! Raspberries! Plum! A robust flavor that burned my throat but I LOVED it! Really, I wish that they could’ve bought me another bottle! Everyone! Las Brisa is the best. Get it and see for yourself! Wait…! My food tasted good…I think. The medium-rare Filet Mignon was perfect with the onions, mushrooms, and figs. The sea bass was AMAZING with the miso butter! And did we have dessert? Having asked Jen while writing this, yes we did. My sister and I each got a Classic Crème Brulee (my sister ordered for me since I was out of it from the wine) and Joey got the Capital Grille Cheesecake. The final bill came and Joey got out his credit card. I can’t remember what it was since I was drunk but I’m sure it was a lot. We left the restaurant and walked back to Metro City Apartments. I don’t even remember walking back to the apartment, but from what my sister told me, this is what happened. Once back at her place, Jen guides me into my room that she showed me earlier. The mattress was all blown up with three layers of covers. Because I was so out of it, she helped me into my bed, gave me a hug, and told me goodnight. From that total blackout that happened since I downed that red wine, I will now tell you what I remember next. I heard a loud noise. Then I heard crying. Then I realized what happened. The carpet was covered in red vomit. I threw up all over her floor. My sheets and pajamas that she lent me were sopping wet with pee. And I was curled up in a fetal position, crying my eyes out. To all my JJ Littles out there: Accidents happen. But let me tell you, everyone. This was only the beginning.

I became incontinent as the result of an unexpected side effect of surgery when I was 14 years old in 1956. So I've now been living with bladder-control issues for 68 years. Becoming incontinent as a young teenager was devastating, in fact so devastating that I contemplated suicide. So I definitely understand how some people feel that incontinence has their lives. However, fortunately, I didn't kill myself. And I came to appreciate the sensuality that diapers can provide and realized that I did not have to suffer from incontinence and could to a degree even enjoy it. Unfortunately, many people living with incontinence never get beyond the suffering stage.

Hello dear readers Thanks for your comments. I have the next part ready to publish. It is not so long this time but as I want to keep it on a day-to-day Chapter length the first ones will be shorter. Annie Chapter 2 - Aquarium - Quite too busy while exploring the city When Lila got up, she was excited. A whole day of exploration and discoveries was coming up. While her parents were still sleeping and surely dreaming about boring adult stuff like working or creating rules for each other. But she was awake and could hardly wait anymore until the city was woken up by the tickling rays of the sun. “Lila, are you already out of bed?” whispered her mum as she saw her daughter sitting on the table watching the first cars deep under them. They were surely heading to an early start at work or returning from their night shift watching over the sleeping inhabitants in this ocean of concrete and briggs. “Yes, mum. What are we up to doing today?”, her girl asked excitedly, wishing her parents would finally leave their beds. “I thought we should go and check out the aquarium.”, her mother suggested. “It could be an interesting place to explore the maritime environment, don't you think?” Lila nodded again, still not entirely sure if it would be a comfortable place to spend their first day in the city. “You want to carefully wake your daddy. We have a breakfast buffet included, and it would be a great way to start the day together.” She smiled mischievously, thinking about all the different ways she could bring him back from his dreams to the real world. With a smile, she walked over to the still-snoring men. She was sitting next to her dad, kissing him awake. “Daddy they have prepared a buffet for us and Mum wants to take me to the aquarium.”, she began to speak. “And...”, she wanted to continue when her dad began to tickle her and dragged her under the blanket. “Honey, you don't want to sleep anymore?”, he concluded as her mum did just moments ago. “No, Daddy, I cannot! We have so much to do”, she explained to the sleeping adult and sounded so excited. ### Two hours later, they were finally arriving at the entrance. And Lila could not stand waiting anymore. She had waited so long and now was circling her parents while they were waiting patiently. “Do you need to go to the bathroom before we go in?”, her mum asked, just making sure she did not force her child into using her diaper. Maybe she should have brought the pull-ups along as well, just to give her the possibility to go on her own. But on the other hand, she was sure the baby-sized pull-ups even in the biggest size would not be a help if she really had an accident. In Lila's eyes, there was no need for that at all, her mother had put her in a fresh diaper after breakfast and the little but still teenage girl had already decided she was not too keen on using the public bathrooms. So without telling the embarrassing decision to her parents, she would just use her diapers if she needed to pee, as she did on the flight. “No! Mum, I don't have to go.”, she answered truthfully but forgot to mention that she already peed when they were in the metro. Dad booked them on a guided tour, for one and a half hours they could see the maritime world waiting for them behind thick glass windows. Their tour guide was already waiting for the kids and teens tour right at the entrance. “Are we all ready to leave?”, the young woman asked, wearing a bluish-colored shirt. And she started to explain interesting things about the place while showing them around. For the next ninety minutes, they were all quite busy walking through the site, watching fish in the tanks and even feeding them under the watchful eyes of the zookeeper. As Lila did not want to miss a single second of the interesting program, she again ignored her mum's attempt to help her if a toilet was close by. While her diaper between her legs was starting to get heavy. At about noon, the tour ended, and they were having lunch in a sunken-ship-themed restaurant. Lila joyfully was running around her Mummy. “Look what I found”, she led her parents to the free spot that was just separated by a glass window from the fishes. Long before her parents finished reading the menu, Lila had decided to go with the much more colorful kid’s menu and quickly found her loved spaghetti with tomato sauce and cheese. “Mummy, can you get me the spaghetti?” she ordered, immediately going back to look into the large tanks containing the big sharks and barracudas as if they were swimming right next to their sunken ship. As she was watching, her diaper was getting very wet now, and began to feel slightly uncomfortable. Should she ask her mum to change her? Did her parents even bring a spare nappy? Her mum seemed so determined to let her go to the toilet all day long, while she did not even once admit she had to go, when mum offered her to pee like a big kid. When they chose what they wanted, she decided to join her mum as they went over to pick up their plates and drinks. “Wait for a second”, her mother asked her to stop and was discreetly sliding her hand over the back of her summer dress, feeling the wet nappy underneath. “You are pretty wet aren't you”, her mum asked, noticing that her child seemed to ignore all her reminders to use the potty and had just peed herself instead. Lila blushed in embarrassment as the truth was becoming clear to her mum. “Does it still hold up until we have finished lunch?”, she asked, not willing to check and embarrass her any further in public. The little girl honestly did not know. She had not counted every time she just let herself trickle a little, when she felt the urge coming back. Yes, sure she had a lot of orange juice and hot chocolate for her breakfast, but she was wearing a real diaper after all. “No, I think I am fine.”, she told her mum, knowing that this was borderline lying to her. “Don't worry, I will change you immediately after our meal.”, Lila heard her mum and felt suddenly relieved, as this was how her parents were reacting when she wet her pull-ups a lot on her previous vacations. And while she was mussing up her child's hair, her kid was snuggling on her side. She stroked her back as her little girl took drinks from the fill-up station and also put the plates of hot, delicious-looking lunch on their plate before they headed to the checkout. Her mum thought about her little girl as she handed her the purse to pay and smiled as she was trying to sound like she was in charge. She likes playing grown-up, but at the same time simply refuses to go to the potty. Even on their past vacations, Lila just wet herself when it was hard to reach the restrooms in time. But now she did not even try anymore. She thought back to the time when they finally trained her on the last days before she started primary school. Her baby girl in those days was already asking to go poopy on her potty while she always wet herself, until her pediatrician gave her the advice to let her slow down and give her a little more time. So she got used to wearing her pull-ups to school and was still wetting herself every day in the first month. Then suddenly, even if her mum had her doubts, the stress of starting school cooled off, and she finally stopped as if it had never been a problem. Was this similar? She asked herself. Was she having too much stress and now found a way to step back? Could she at least take the stress from her girl while they were on the trip together? But what if she would lose the ability to make it to the potty again? School will be starting again next week and the summer holidays are still two months away. “You seem so worried?”, her husband tried to cheer her up as he noticed she had not even touched her plate. He was taking her wife's hand. Maybe she was worrying too much about her child, she finally decided. She was much happier since she was back in diapers, and that could not be bad for her child, couldn't it? She finally started eating her meal while the others were already halfway through their lunch. As Lila finished her meal, she again felt the need to pee. Without hesitation, she just relaxed and let it all out. But this time the wetness did not disappear anymore, and also her dress felt uncomfortable and wetness started to dribble down her legs. “What's up, darling?”, her mum asked her as she noticed her strange behavior. She was looking over to her daughter, noticing the crowing wet stains on her precious girl's dress. “Oh, I think you are leaking honey”, she revealed what Lila desperately wanted to hide. Her mum grabbed her big bag, helping her child to stand up. As comfortable as she was with peeing her pants, she did not want anyone to see what she did here sitting in the middle of the restaurant. She wished her mum would just help her to take her on her hips and let her cover her eyes in the shirt to feel more protected while she brought her over to the bathroom. “Mum, please!”, Lila begged for help as she felt all the eyes of the other guests on her wet bum. Finally, her mum at least put her arm around her and quickly dragged her out of the room while she could at least hide her face a little. “We just had an accident”, she heard her mum talk to one of the employees. And was hardly noticing the response as her mum dragged her to a room close by. The noise of the tourists slowly walking was coming to an end as the door closed. “Here, we have a special changing table to fit kids her age”, the man said that Lila identified as one of the service personnel of the restaurant. “Thanks, that is really a great help, what can we do to clean her chair?” she heard her mum asking. “Don't worry, this happens a lot even if normally to slightly younger guests, so the chairs have a plastic cover and can be cleaned easily.” He smiled, easing the worries on her mum's face. Lila quickly hid her face again and just let loose when she heard the door close and Mum's arms lifting her up, sitting her on the soft plastic surface as she unpacked her bag. Her mum had packed not only a spare diaper, but also another dress that she could wear instead of her now wet one. “Oh, this is soaked, why did you not go to the restroom with me when I asked you to”, her mother grumbled slightly as she undressed her. She did not notice as her daughter’s eyes sank in shame. “Or at least you could have told me how wet you really are?” Lila sighed at the hard words she no longer could take. Without being able to stop it, she felt some tears running down her cheeks. The seconds passed. Was she too strict with her girl? She clearly was desperate now. Her mummy instinct took over. She could not stand seeing Lila in tears anymore, even if this meant that her daughter's potty training was on the line. Suddenly, her mum took a napkin and dried her tears. “Baby it is not a problem at all.”, she quickly added as she noticed that in trying to let her be the teenager, she had overestimated what Lila could bear by a lot. Maybe I should have checked on you as I did all the previous years. And she could still hear the feelings of worry and anger in her voice. As innocently as she could, Lila looked her mum in the eyes. “You want me to help you more, don't you”, her mum tried to find out why her daughter suddenly ditched her potty training. Her child nodded, while she was not even able to look her in the eyes. Should we step back some more to make it more comfortable for you on the vacation, she asked again, and this time she could mumble a soft yes as her answer. Her mum seemed to notice that she was lifting a lot of weight off her small daughter's shoulder. And she simply kissed her kid to get rid of the rest of her tears. Taking some of the wipes that were provided, she quickly cleaned the diaper area, rolled up the sodden now yellow-tainted diaper, and placed a fresh one under her bum. Just as in the airport, she was quickly back in something clean and comfy. Finally, Lila could smile again as her mum put the new dress over her head. “Mummy please, can you hold my hand”, she asked her big guardian as they left the room some seconds later. And as she grabbed her fingers to hold her mum she felt the connection to her parents again and the child in her was back, enjoying that they still could stay here while she was dancing back to their seats. “Thanks”, she heard her mum say as they passed the waiter that helped them out before. “Sure, we are here to help.”, he told her, while Lila greeted him with a big smile. “You are feeling better too?”, he asked her, clearly not thinking that she was thirteen. The little girl who could not keep her legs from tumbling in joy nodded. “You were really brave, so if you want and your mum allows it, you can choose a little treat for yourself from the kid's dessert menu”, he told Lila. Handing her a printed sheet that was a mixture of a menu with some fish to color in between. “Thanks, we would love to”, her mum said, as she took two separate sheets for herself and her husband from the adult menu stack. And with a smile, they returned to their table and ended up eating a yummy dessert as well. While they headed out exploring in the afternoon, Lila noticed some changes. Her mum now ended all the futile reminders of the possible stops at the restrooms. Instead, in a much more embarrassing manner, started to check her daughter's diaper whenever she could do it without making her child sink in shame. And while the first checks were embarrassing, she noticed that now where the procedure no longer involved her being responsible for her diaper, she started to relax even more and just trusted her parents to be there for her. ### The bright sunlight shining on the bed tickled Lila awake. The clock on the TV showed her it was just a little past six in the morning. The childlike girl felt incredibly groggy, like she had not rested at all. They had spent the entire last day at the aquarium, and it was a great experience. So by the time they left in the evening, every member of the family was exhausted, and the small girl closed her eyes even before her mum finished changing her for the night. With her feet, she pushed the covers slightly down and turned to her Mom, who was still sleeping peacefully next to her, holding her with her arm. Lila and Maria shared the same queen-sized bed, while Dad had a separate bed next to them for himself. As she moved her legs a little, she noticed the warm and slightly squish diaper around her booty. While her pajamas were still dry and comfy. The girl wondered if she had a wet night, but then she remembered she peed her diaper at night as she was much too tired to get up, and she was pretty sure she did that not just once. It still was comfy, and Lila did not see any need to get changed immediately. She actually just wanted to drift back to sleep and get at least a couple more hours of rest. But as much as she tried, she could not. For once the sun was much too bright and second there was this dull ache in her belly. What should she do? All her potty training told her she should remove the sodden diaper and head to the bathroom. But then her Mom would have to get up from her deep sleep and change her into a fresh diaper for the rest of her night, or she would risk a wet bed in the morning when she sleeps without her protection for one or two hours. She thought how easy this was in the airport, what if she could just go in her diaper now and worry when her mum was up? But no, when she goes poopy in her bed with the toilet so close by, her Mom would get angry for sure? Cleaning up after she messed in her diaper was quite a smelly work, after all. And while she had her mum’s approval on the trip to push it all in her diaper, that was just because they were in a hurry, and she could not hold it any longer. Maybe she could pretend that she pooped in her diaper while she was sleeping, but ... no, Mom would never believe that. She rolled back facing her mum as the ache got worse. She finally had to wake her, as she was certain it was the only way out of her dilemma. Lila crawled closer to Mom’s side and whispered, “Mummy wake up .... Mummy please ... Mummy!“ “Good morning, dear.” she finally said with sleep still in her eyes, letting her daughter's head down on her shoulder. “Why are you up so early? I’m still pretty tired myself.” “Mummy!.” replied Lila in desperation as she now needed to go really urgently. “I can't sleep anymore because I desperately need to go to the toilet. My belly is aching a little.” Mom stroked her hair for a moment as she thought about it. “Why don't you just go poopy in your diaper again … it's easier, and you don't need to worry.”, her Mom suggested as if that was the obvious solution for her problem, And yawningly she added. “I promise, I will change you when we both get up later.” With her mum’s promise in her mind, Lia wiggled around to find a comfortable position for pooping herself. But this was a little hard as she was laying in bed and her body is not used to doing that. Surely, she could just squat down, but she really wanted to stay in her bed, snug and close to her mum. Her mum just smiled at her, come I help you, she mumbles and as she rocked her a little on her tummy. And as she pushed her legs slightly apart, she lost her control and she noticed a little log of poop already leaving her. “Just do it, and you can get back to sleep”, she padded her as she began to climb out of bed. Lila closed her eyes and pushed. Moments later, the tummy was soft and relaxed, and just the warm babyish feeling on her booty was a reminder of what she had done. “I will close the curtains”, explained Mum as she got up for a moment and opened the window a little bit. Before laying back next to Lila. A scent of poop came from under their blankets as Lila opened her eyes again. Are you feeling better, she asked as she rolled Lila closer to herself and kissed her forehead. Lila, still embarrassed about what she just did, was enjoying her mum’s attention. And before she started to rock her back to sleep, she pulled back the waistband of her diaper and confirmed that her little girl indeed pooped herself. You had to go quite urgently, that must have been uncomfortable all night for your little belly? She assumed, now starting to rock her softly, “Are you feeling better now.” Lila nodded. “At least the ache in my tummy is gone”, she smiled. “With diapers on, it is much easier to just go if you need to pee or poop instead of holding in, don't you agree.” “You are not mad at me for not trying harder to avoid a potty accident like that. I thought I should have taken off my diaper and headed to the toilet instead.” “Baby no! Please don't take it off yourself. You still wet your bed. I prefer it if you wake up with a poopy diaper over changing your wet bedding. Is pooping yourself so uncomfortable for you.” She wanted to hear the feelings of Lila. “No, using it does not feel bad at all. It pushes away the anger when something does not go as I liked it and brings back all these nice memories from when I was little and did not care. Maybe I miss being that carefree little girl.” her child in her arms confessed. Mum gave her Lila a kiss on the cheek. “I also would love to have my play and cheerful kid back, and I missed caring for my baby. So it is never a chore for me to clean you up when you are wet or messy.” She slowly patted her daughter's belly. “Can you promise your mummy to be carefree about that and just go potty in your diaper whenever you need to?” Lila nodded with a childish smile. “And if you want some more cuddles or something else, however childish it may seem, tell me or your dad, ok?” The smiling girl nestled down into Mum’s shoulder. She could relax with her mum so close, and after the talk with her mother, she felt the ease of mind about her current embarrassing potty habits. Lila still felt the warm mess on her bum, and the oddly smoothing feeling again let her forget all her teeny worries, and she drifted back to sleep

I am new to this area and would like to know if there is meetups or people that are looking to meet like minded people

Hello, welcome I bet your a great caregiver Enjoy it here

Welcome to Daily Diapers (DD)@Miss Mummy. 🤗 Hope you will enjoy it here and make a lot of new friends. Learning new things and sharing your experiences as a mummy with other mummies, daddies, ab's, littles, ak's etc. I think DD is one of the best places on the web for ABDLs

Chapter Thirty Six John rolled back off of the giant pillow, not even flinching as his very wet diaper hit the bed. He grumbled as he rolled around a bit. He even resorted to grabbing the pillow and just pulling on it mindlessly. Being half buried under the pillow just made him even grumpier. Finally he just growled out loud as he shoved the pillow off of him, got onto all fours and flopped back onto the pillow. Without even bothering to call out to his supposed Mommy, he idly swung his foot back and forth, barely kicking at the gate. After less than a minute he got bored with that and turned sideways so that he was draped over the pillow with his butt up in the air and his upper body and legs hanging off the sides. Looking through the mesh he saw the dog sit up and look over at him. “Xerxes, go get me a file, a nuclear reactor, and coil of wire.” When the dog, predictably, did not react, he reached out and put his palm against the mesh and halfway smiled as his hand was smelled. This time when he grumbled and rolled around, he flopped off of the pillow and laid in front of the mesh, looking at Xerxes. With nothing else to do, he talked to the dog. “You know Xerxes, by all rights if I were still at home I’d be working sixty hours a week and worried about bills. Here I don’t have to work and I get to draw and spend time outside and Mom is great. But I can’t just like … get in my truck and go buy popcorn in the middle of the night.” Laying there for a moment in silence, he watched the dog still looking back at him, tail moving, just happy to be talked to. “I suppose that you don’t know what it’s like to be conflicted.” With a pat on the mesh he rolled around restlessly, got back onto all fours and flopped back onto the pillow, this time facing Xerxes from his perch. Musing to himself “I wonder if I just miss the idea of the freedom. I don’t think I could even be happy there anymore. Maybe I’m grumpy because I’m happy.” After a moment he added to himself “Maybe I’m grumpy because I’m just grumpy.” He picked up his head and headbutted the pillow a few times, still grumbling. “Let’s face it, I have more time to do fun things, and instead of working six days a week I get to be here with Mom… Aman… Mom.” He spent a couple more minutes laying there practicing his grumpy faces. He saw his pacy laying there. Not clipped to his shirt with that stupid clip that he couldn’t undo. Just laying right there. He thought about the implication of ‘his’ pacy. Impulsively he picked it up and threw it hard against the mesh wall of the crib. It just bounced off uselessly, but it felt good to throw something. He picked up Rupert and thought about it, but couldn’t bring himself to throw the stuffy. It wasn’t Ruperts fault that he was grumpy. Finally he just snapped and grabbed the pacy and threw it hard while yelling just a loud “UUGGG.” The concept of controlling his emotions didn’t exist at the moment. After a short wait he heard Amanda coming through the doorway and over to the wall of the crib. Stupid crib wall. She reached up and lowered the side wall down and leaned on it. He spared a glance, and she looked concerned. Stupid concern. Hearing her ask softly “Hey Sweety, are you okay?” just made him take a deep breath and exhale as long as he could until he felt his lungs blissfully empty. It took a moment to decide how to answer that. He wanted to be mad. He wanted to lash out. None of this was her fault, and he knew it. But even still he rolled away from her and onto his back looking up at the ceiling. With a deep sigh he admitted. “No.” She was quiet for a moment. He didn’t know if it was because she was giving him time to talk if he wanted to, or if she was just trying to figure out what to say. After a moment he saw a hand come over and felt her stroking his hair. He tensed up, but relaxed as she stroked his hair softly. It was barely a whisper that he heard from behind him “You can talk to me about anything that you want to.” Picking up his left arm and waving a bit dismissively, he explained “I don’t know what it is anyway.” “Do you want some snuggles?” He thought about it for a moment. He liked snuggles. And he wanted them. But he also just … was still mad at something, or anything. Or nothing. “… no.” “Well, you can change your mind at any time. Do you want to go draw, or go outside?” After a moment to breathe, and stall to think, he admitted “I don’t know.” Her voice was soft as velvet as she whispered “It’s okay if you don’t know what you want to do. None of us have to know what we want all the time.” With a huff he responded “I don’t know what I want. I should at least know that.” “Sweety.” Amanda said while patting him oh so gently on the side. “Look at me for a moment.” Giving in and rolling onto his back, he looked over at her. Once he was looking at her, she continued “It sounds like you’re struggling with some big feelings. And those probably need to process. I won’t push you, but if you can find the words to express those big feelings, I would love nothing more than to hear them and help you with them.” A weak laugh was all he could muster. “Am I even allowed to have big feelings? Are littles supposed to get those here?” “Ah.” was all Amanda said for a moment. “So does that mean that littles don’t get that right?” He felt bad for pushing, but he was grumpy and otherwise if he had the thought he would have just bottled it up until it festered in him. “John.” Amanda started carefully “I won’t lie to you that sometimes littles in this world don’t get that choice. You still do. I want you to be as complex and thoughtful and sweet and mischievous as can be. If you’re sad, I want you to tell me. If you’re happy, I want you to tell me. And if there’s something eating at you, I definitely want you to tell me.” “Ugh.” was all he said at first. But of course she stood there waiting patiently, her hand gently on his head, stroking his hair. “Is that snuggle still available?” Now smiling she explained “For you, the very best snuggles.” With a nod he held up his arms. He didn’t even bother to sit up. She just picked him up and carried him, wet diaper and all, into the living room and sat with him on the rocking chair. She even pulled the throw blanket up over him and got him snuggled in nice and warm, with one large hand patting him on the back. She didn’t speak. She just held him. She was obviously waiting for him. For his part he just laid there with his head on her chest, lost in thought. After a while he finally broke the silence. “I don’t get it.” The hand on his back stopped moving as she answered “What don’t you get.” He answered candidly “I don’t get what I don’t get. I miss my world. I know that rationally I am honestly healthier here, I’m not working myself to death. But I miss it.” After she took a moment to think carefully of her response, she asked “Well, what do you miss most about it?” “I don’t … I think …” He struggled to understand himself and how to say it in words. “… maybe the freedom? But I guess I wasn’t really all THAT free, I spent all of me week at work. I came home tired, I barely paid my bills. So it’s not like I had some glamorous life. I just … had … is autonomy the word?” He could see her nod as she answered “That may well be the word you are looking for. Self determination, perhaps?” Having looked up at her, he flopped his head back against her chest. “I have time to read and draw, and I get to help you in the garden. Helping you do things is my favorite thing in this world. Even if I had the choice to go back home … I don’t know if I could. Or would? I don’t understand. I think I feel like I shouldn’t be happy?” The rocking chair stopped moving for a moment and she scooted him up closer and kissed him on the forehead. “Well, I obviously WANT you to be happy. I know that we can’t get you home, and for record you helping is wonderful and I love you all the more for wanting to participate. But I can’t force you to be happy. Well, not in any ethical way.” He looked up at her for a moment, but let that pass. She was probably just referring to some odd way the bigs do things in this world. With his head still on her chest he admitted “Don’t worry. I’m happy with you. You’re an amazing Mommy. I didn’t choose to need one, but I’m glad it was you.” That got him another kiss on the forehead. But otherwise she seemed content to wait for him to talk more. “I think I feel better.” A simple, non committal conclusion that … felt like a lie. “… Okay, I feel less bad. I’m sorry.” He could feel her tilt forward as she stood up and pulled the blanket off as she carried him back towards his room. As she laid him on the changing table and got to work she asked him “Okay so what would you like to do? Gardening, drawing, or befriending more animals to make my life complicated? Lift.” He went along with the diaper change, doing his own little part here an there as he answered. “I would like to help in the garden, please.” He answered honestly. For some reason after the talk he had it seemed easier to be direct with her. With a nod and the word “Down.” she continued “Well, you can pick out what you want to wear, and then whatever we have that you want for dinner, I’ll fix it for you.” He thought in silence until she bumped the table and stood him up. While she looked at him, he answered. “Shortalls. Peas. Chicken strips.” “T shirt or onesie?” “Shirt.” With a nod she pulled open a drawer on his dresser and let him get out what he wanted to wear, and then helped him with the straps and clips on the shortalls. Then she lightly bopped him with a pair of socks over and over again until he got the message and put them on. Mommy picked up the doggy bed and simply walked out of the room, leaving him follow or not as he wanted. Small gestures sometimes feel big. With a pause in the kitchen to hand him a sippy cup of water and get a bottle to bring herself, they were out on the porch. His shoes were placed next to his old boots, which made him feel like he was being given the choice. Honestly the boots were a bit too loose from him shrinking so much, so he slipped his feet into the shoes and waited patiently for them to be tied for him, since the weird laces from this dimension always fly apart for him. “Okay!” Mommy said with a single clap of her hands “Tomorrow morning a good friend of mine, Mr Frank, will be here at sunrise to pick up a lot of produce, pickles, and pickled peppers. So all of this has to be harvested today. Except the Arugula, that happens tomorrow right before he gets here so that it’s fresh.” John just nodded along “So how do I help?” “Well, you and your little wagon can be a huge help if you want to just do the peas and the tomatoes. Two buckets of tomatoes will go with Mr Frank, and before lunch Mr Mike is coming back and the rest of them are going to be turned into salsa. I bought the rest of the ingredients I need for that at the store today.” John nodded and stood up, holding his arms out he said “Catch?” He was rewarded with her holding out her arms so he jumped, she caught him, hugged him before she set him down. John go this wagon and went straight for the peas. Only this time instead of Mommy heading to the other side of the garden, she got a couple of buckets and she got started doing the tops of the plants. From his perspective, she didn’t seem like she normally did. She was on a mission. She was in her zone. But John had an advantage. John had a wagon, and he didn’t have to go back and forth or move a bucket. So he pulled it along beside him, and much to his pride, he made it to the end of the first row before she did. He lost his lead when he had to wait for her to simply pick his wagon up and empty it out into a large bucket. Then he lost some more time as she fussed at him for not drinking any water yet. And so they finished the second row together. It felt REALLY good to be doing something meaningful. As they started on the tomato plants, Mommy surprised him. Instead of the safety scissors, she held out a different pair. “These look to be actually sharp.” He said out loud as she held out a pair of scissors that seems small in her hand. “These are tiny sewing shears. I noticed the other ones gave you trouble. You will of course be careful with these.” It was not a question. And so, feeling on top of the world, he drank some water just so that she couldn’t fuss at him, and then got to work on the tomatoes. The problem was the tomatoes took him a long time. All of his tomatoes he put in the wagon wiped off and clean and pretty. But he was being left in the dust. It didn’t matter, he was contributing and didn’t know how to help with the other stuff yet anyway. So he took his time and got two rows of tomatoes from just above his head height and down. By the time he was done, the sun was getting a bit lower, and he sat on the steps and watched Mommy working on the other side of the yard in her little section of hellish death peppers, collecting entire buckets of tiny, brightly colored little murder fruit. With nothing to do otherwise, he spotted a gray form on the fence and somehow Xerxes had gone to watch Mommy. This was his time. He grabbed two acorns and made a line for the fence, dragging a bucket with him. He quickly overturned the bucket and held up one acorn. The reward was having his hand smelled with a tiny, cold, nose briefly before one acorn was taken, then he held up the other and the process was repeated. After a few moments, Steve darted away. Worth it. Once he was done dragging the bucket back, John climbed the too tall stairs up onto the porch to look out over the yard. Impulsively he grabbed the new toy for Xerxes off of the table between the two chairs, pretending that he didn’t have to stand on tip toes to grab it. New toy in hand, he made his way back down the steps, and turned right to go to where Xerxes was watching their Mommy. Ah. Xerxes was watching because she was gathering peppers in the part of the yard he wasn’t allowed. Even dogs weren’t immune to curiosity, it seemed. Xerxes attention was easily attained by holding out the plastic toy with the large tennis ball at the end and letting him smell it. Once he had the dogs undivided attention he took the end of the toy with both hands and hands and swung it over and down. For a first attempt it wasn’t very graceful, and the ball just went horizontally and then bounced along the ground. But that was more than enough to send one furry missile after it. When Xerxes came back, happily presenting the tennis ball, he dropped it and hunkered down waiting for it to be sent away again. With a moment to figure out how to get the ball jammed back in, he put his foot on top of the plastic and gave it a little push to pop it back in place, and sent it off, careful to keep it away from the plants. And that was how the next hour went. Xerxes stayed out of Mommy’s way, and John stayed entertained with his furry buddy. By the time it was all said and done, there were rows of buckets lined up on the side of the porch, some of which he had filled himself. Sure, it wasn’t a full time job like he’d had before, but as John stood looking at everything that they had done it was nice to have done it. Even if Mommy … John shook his head as he thought and corrected himself, ‘Mom’ did most of the actual lifting side of things. As he stood there looking at the buckets, a hand waved in front of his face. He turned to look up at Mom apparently repeating herself “Are you there?” Feeling even more direct than usual he shrugged and said “I was lost in thought.” He watched her nod and then she knelt down and pulled his shoes off before giving him a gentle swat on the bottom and pointing him into the house. So in he went. He made it halfway to the living room before he was scooped up and carried to the bathroom where he was stripped down to his diaper, placed (with a squish) onto the bathroom counter, and scrubbed with a warm wet rag. “Hey, I’m not THAT dirty!” he tried to protest. She leaned and squinted at him. Then as she held up the white rag with traces of dirt all over it he bravely decided to concede her point by shrugging noncommittally. Once he was clean enough to pass inspection she carried him to the changing table and he participated in his usual way. Lifting. Flopping. Basically just trying to not make it harder than necessary for her. Once it was done, really only two minutes, she picked him up into a great big hug and slid him down to the floor. “Okay. You get a shirt or onesie. Or just the diaper if you want. Then I’ll get dinner going, shouldn’t take long.” Nodding, John went over to the dresser and grabbed the handle, leaned back into it to pull the drawer open, and grabbed just any shirt without looking. It was blue and had some sort of cartoon on it. With a nod, Mom took the shirt from him and pulled it into place, ruffled his hair and said “Go play or draw.” So as she walked out of the room he went over to his tablet and pressed his thumb against the corner to turn it on. There were a lot of new icons to explore, but this seemed a great time to sit and read. He didn’t want to read ahead of Kate in the Odyssey of Hugh, so he just idly scrolled the young adult section until he found a Scifi novel about a spaceship crew being lost in space. The image showed a man, a woman, and two littles all in space suits. In the background there was some sort of robot nanny with sparks like it was going haywire. Curiosity got the better of him so he clicked ‘Start Reading’ and went through the prologue at the beginning. It seemed like the book was about a group from one planet to another and they got rerouted by the autocomputer to avoid an asteroid storm, and from there things spiraled out of control. Settling in to read, he felt something cold bopping him on the shoulder relentlessly until he took the sippy cup and started drinking from it. Interrupted again later for dinner, John found himself back in his booster seat, looking at two large chicken strips that were supposedly normal sized. Each one was really just the size of a chicken breast at home. There was ketchup for the chicken strips, and he had a bowl chock full of buttery sweet peas waiting for him. Once he bit into the chicken strip, it was obvious that it was made with some sort of voodoo or something, because it was addictively good. It was an excellent dinner and he gave up halfway through the second chicken strip and made sure that Xerxes was very well spoiled. Carried to the kitchen and placed on the counter, hands washed, face wiped. He sat on the counter and impulsively held up his arms for a hug. Somehow the assurance that just making the simple gesture guaranteed he was going to be picked up and hugged lovingly made him feel a certain way. Try as he might he couldn’t think of what it made him feel. The nearest he could come was the word safe. John still didn’t know why he even wanted to be picked up and hugged sometimes. It was like a magnet. Carrying him to the living room, Mom explained “You have one hour before you get changed for bed, and then snuggle time and milk. What would you like to do?” “Tablet, please.” With a nod she sat him down on the couch, plopped a pillow next to him. His feet were swung around on the couch, and finally a throw blanket was draped over his legs and his tablet was offered to him. As a kiss was deposited on his head, he was left to himself. He looked briefly at the icons for the puzzle games, but felt mentally tired enough to just go back to his book. He was barely thirty pages in when he was patted on the shoulder. Apparently his hour was already up. It was a little annoying to find out that his diaper was wet when she pulled the blanket back and gave it a squeeze. And for the second time in probably three hours he was back on the changing table. This time it was one of the ridiculous overnight diapers that was pulled out from the table. Seemingly as an afterthought he stopped her “Wait!” Mom blinked down at him “Yes?” “Before you do that, may I try the potty?” He pleaded as cutely as he could manage. With a smile and a nod, she bumped the table and picked him up and carted him, sans underwear, to the bathroom. As she placed him on the toilet, he nodded seriously, thinking 'This is it. It’s time.' before making a face as he concentrated. As he managed to do his business in both ways, he could see Mom smiling in the corner of his vision, clearly proud of him. But he didn’t need her to be proud, he needed to know that he could still at least manage to go in the potty ...err… Toilet. He still wasn’t allowed to reach for the toilet paper and wipe himself. But for now, this was enough of a success. As he was cleaned up and carried back, he pondered the catch twenty two he had found himself in. He had to wear a diaper. It got changed when it got used. And he had to wear it because it got used. He couldn’t physically get onto the potty so going in the diaper was inevitable. And since the diaper got used, the diaper was needed. Rinse, Lather, Repeat. John chuckled to himself as he thought out loud: “Wipe, Powder, Repeat” Mom tapped him on the nose as she finished taping him into the ridiculous night time diaper and asked “What was that?” “Oh, I was just mumbling to myself.” As she picked him up stretched his arms and legs out as far as he could before wrapping himself around her torso. The entire atmosphere of the house seemed more relaxed as he was handed Rupert on the way to the living room. Mom had a fresh warm blanket that she had tossed in the dryer for a few minutes. She held him with one arm as she leaned back in the rocking chair and tossed the blanket over them in one well practiced motion. He was snuggled up against her chest and cradled in place with her arm as the warmth from her body and from the blanket started to soak into his body and make him relaxed. “Hey John?” Opening one eye to peak up he asked “Hmm?” “I’ve read many cases that littles find skin to skin contact comforting.” All he could do was shrug “I don’t know?” The question came from above him “Do you want to find out?” It didn’t make much sense to him, but he just said “Sure.” So first she pulled off his shirt, which was the only thing that he was wearing aside from his diaper. And then she wormed out of her own shirt, shuffling him around to get it off of her arm before getting the blanket back in place and idly stroking her fingertips up and down his back. Before he had felt warmth. But now it was on another level, warmth from her belly and ribs directly into his side and arm. A pacy was slipped into his mouth, and he didn’t fight it. He was trapped in a wondrous cocoon. He felt warm, his head was directly on a chest, and everything from the smell from her skin to his own pressed against her just seemed perfect. And that was how they spent their usual 20-30 minute snuggle that night. Eventually a bra strap was lowered and it was time for him to breast feed. It still felt a bit awkward to be an adult being breastfed. But the moment milk made its way to his tongue, none of that mattered. Somewhere along the way he was pried off the nipple with a finger and then moved to the other one. To his credit he felt proud that he thought he drained the other one fully before falling asleep. (He didn’t even come close)

Wishing my fellow Christians a very Happy Easter And for the non believers, you get some chocolate too!

It was/is exactly the same for me. My first love was the rubber sheet. But my now smooth crinkly vinyl protective sheet is winning me over.

Chapter 2: Fully Prepared I tilted my head back, forcing myself to finish each drop of water from the twelve-ounce glass that I had filled to the brim. I had just come home from school, but it wasn't too early to begin working on getting myself as hydrated as possible for what I was planning on doing tonight. Plus, I had a soccer game to play in a couple of hours. It wouldn't hurt to be prepared for that, either. Grace was already home when the bus dropped me off halfway down the block in our suburban neighborhood. It was easy to get lost in the neighborhood if you didn't know what street you were on. Development in the neighborhood had just finished when we moved in a decade ago. The cookie-cutter homes all looked the same – houses painted with a repetitive palette of bland colors, a scattering of barely mature trees dotting the front yards. I waved goodbye to my two friends, Angie and Emma, as I got off the bus, knowing that I'd be seeing them again in a few hours. Angie was three blocks down from my house. Emma was on the opposite side of the sprawling neighborhood, about a half-mile away. We'd put a lot of miles on our bikes once our parents had decided that we were old enough to make the trek back and forth between our houses unsupervised. Emma's parents were going out for the evening, so she would be hitching a ride with us to the game this evening. My stomach felt uncomfortably full after downing so much water so quickly. I belched. "Well, excuse you," my older sister called out from the living room, where she was reading a book on the couch. I probably should have taken it a bit slower, sipping on the water over the course of a few minutes rather than trying to chug it down all at once. But I couldn't help myself sometimes. I was very much an all-or-nothing type of person, and I wasn't going to allow myself to waver the slightest bit in my commitment to finally wetting the bed tonight. Grace always arrived home from high school before the bus dropped me off. In a few minutes, she would walk to the end of the block to pick up Jackson when he was dropped off from elementary school. It was nice to have some freedom between the time I got dropped off by the school bus and the time when my parents returned home from work. Yes, Grace was left in charge, but my older sister was more focused on making sure Jackson wasn't getting into trouble than worrying about me. The most she would ever do would be to remind me to do my homework, which was better than getting a lecture from my parents for not having gotten started on it before dinner. I set the empty glass on the counter next to the sink and retreated to my bedroom. I should have been starting on my homework. Any assignments from school were supposed to be done before I could have any time to myself, but I had no desire to even try to begin working on the Algebra sheet that I had been sent home with. I shut the door behind me as I entered the bedroom. Grace knew better than to barge in on me. We had a well-established quid pro quo about staying out of each other's rooms. I knew she wasn't going to barge in on me announced. Jackson, on the other hand, had about as much respect for boundaries as one would expect from a six-year-old boy, which is to say that he really didn't have that many. I had to be a lot more careful when he was around. My bed had a set of dressers underneath it, most of which I used for storing various odds and ends. My clothes went into my regular dresser and closet. Buried beneath a pile of old books and notebooks in the bottom middle drawer under my bed were some of my most treasured possessions. I had three copies of Reader's Digest. After the first time I had come across the ad for the nighttime pull-ups on it, I browsed through all the magazines my mom hadn't managed to throw out yet. A few had the same ad, so I didn't bother keeping them, but I did get lucky enough to find one with a different ad. Then, for the following year, I kept a close watch on the new magazines that were arriving in the mail. Mom thought it was nice that I was doing so much reading. But I was just carefully scanning all the ads, hoping to get another glimpse of the object that had been the focus of all my desires for the past couple of years. A couple of months later, I was in luck. There was a new ad in the magazine, one that noted an upgraded absorbency for the pull-ups. I waited a couple of weeks to be sure that Mom was finished reading the magazine before squirreling it away at the bottom of my dresser drawer. There was a reason that I maintained this paper collection. My dad was an IT network administrator. The very first lesson I got from him about the internet was that absolutely nothing that happened on it was truly secret. Yes, there were layers of secrecy you could hide behind, but if someone was looking and knew what they were doing, they could find it out. The next lesson was never to talk with adults or strangers online. And the third was never to put my personal information where people could easily access it. I don't think he had intended it to be a veiled threat that I should be careful about what I was doing on the internet, but I had taken the message in that direction anyway. It had taken all of my self-control to not Google the name of the pull-up brand that I had seen in Reader's Digest a year ago. The ad even had a website listed for the product. I knew there had to be better pictures on there. I wanted to look at it so badly, but there would be no good explanation of why I had visited that website. My smartphone, which I had gotten as a gift at the start of middle school a couple of years ago, had come with a parental control app on it. My mom had been reluctant to have me get a phone in the first place. My older sister had been made to wait until the start of high school. Grace had been a bit salty at how I had been allowed to get a phone a lot earlier than her, though her attitude changed when she realized Mom and Dad were going to be monitoring it. I didn't like having the parenting software on my phone, but it was the compromise Dad had reached with Mom, which had been the only way she would have agreed to let me have a phone before high school. My sister – set to graduate high school in two weeks – had a lot more freedom with how she used her electronics. Maybe I could convince Mom and Dad to let off the restraints some when I started high school. I pulled out the most recent magazine from the drawer and flipped it open to a dogeared page marking the most recent pull-up advertisement. If Mom hadn't been aware that these pull-ups were a thing when my older sister had been a bedwetter, she surely was aware of it now. I knew for a fact that she read these magazines cover to cover. I wondered. How many nights in a row would I need to wet the bed before she was to go and purchase the pull-ups for me? Knock. Knock. Someone was tapping on my bedroom door. "Anybody home?" Grace called out, knocking again. I hastily pulled back the sheets on my bed slightly, tossed the magazine under them, and pulled the sheets back on top. It really wasn't unnecessary. Reading a magazine shouldn't be suspicious in any way, but I nonetheless felt compelled to hide it, as if having it in view when Grace opened the door would somehow give me away. I rolled my eyes. I wasn't going to play along with whatever stupid knock-knock joke Grace was trying to make. "Just come in," I yelled back. Graced opened the door just a couple inches, enough for her to stare at me through the hallway. There was no mistaking us for sisters. As I could tell from family photos, I was a spitting image of her when she was my age, from our red hair to green eyes to the expressions we made on our faces. "I'm walking over to wait for Jackson. Why don't you get started on your homework?" She didn't even wait for a reply; she just turned right around and headed back down the hallway. She didn't even bother to close the door behind her, probably because she expected that I'd be leaving my bedroom to get started on homework right away. I knew better than to be annoyed at her. If not for the reminder, I probably would have completely forgotten about my homework. My parents knew me too well. I was not allowed to do homework in the bedroom, especially not with the door shut. That my parents had good reasons for that decree didn't mean that I liked the rule. <><><> The homework sheet sat in front of me. I'd been seated at the kitchen table for ten minutes and hadn't yet written anything down with my pencil. Next to the paper was a glass of water – I'd only filled it halfway up this time – that I was periodically sipping once a minute. The water was not helping me concentrate. Each time I took another sip of water, all I could think of was what I was going to be doing tonight. I didn't need to pee yet. That I had a strong bladder was probably one of the reasons I hadn't taken after my sister's bedwetting. I heard the sound of the front door opening in the distance, followed by the sound of running feet and my sister's voice calling out after them. "Hey! You! Get back here. No shoes in the house." Jackson raced down the hallway, past the kitchen, and into the family room. Watching TV was his typical routine when he came home from school. Grace followed after him, an irritated look on her face as she went to get him to take off his shoes. I wished that I could say that the arrival of my siblings had interrupted my train of thought, but there hadn't even been one to begin with as I stared back down at the sheet of homework yet again. I tried to think back to what Mr. Thompson had been saying about how to start the process of solving these equations, but I had been far too distracted earlier this afternoon in class. I was so going to fail my math class next year. I was not looking forward to the start of high school. All my teachers kept stressing how our grades would actually really matter starting then. It felt like grades mattered plenty already, with how my parents reacted to my report cards at the end of each semester. But if getting my report card was what I would need to endure in order to begin my summer break, then that would be a fair tradeoff. There was the pitter-patter of running feet again, but this time, it wasn't quite as loud. Jackson sprinted past on his way to the front door. This time, his sneakers were in his hands rather than his feet. Grace came into the kitchen to get a snack for my brother. She stopped to peer over my shoulder. "Algebra, already?" She sounded a bit incredulous. "I don't think I started for you until next year." I explained how Mr. Thompson had been so evil as to have us working ahead, all in the name of having us ready for next year. "That's nonsense," Grace said. "Like anyone in your class is going to remember that after summer break." She went and grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and filled it with some trail mix that she carried over to Jackson. I wasn't hungry, but I realized it might be a good idea. Something salty to eat would help make me thirty enough to continue drinking more water. Or maybe I just wanted an excuse to procrastinate more on my homework. I was sorely tempted just to make up some numbers on the assignment. It wasn't like it would count for much, and I probably wasn't going to get that good of a grade in my math class, anyway. I found myself staring up at the wall while I munched on the salty snack, leaving my homework sheet ignored on the table. How long was it going to take for this plan to be successful? Would I have pull-ups by tomorrow night? That wasn't likely. I couldn't imagine a one-off event leading to that purchase. Two nights in a row? Maybe. But it was more likely than not that I was going to need to keep this up for a while. I was pretty sure I could keep my bedwetting secret from Jackson. He wasn't observant enough to notice anything that didn't directly impact him. And there was no way Mom and Dad would be telling him about my accidents. They hadn't even told me about my sister's bedwetting until that one time I had accidentally stumbled across her secret. There would be trouble if Jackson did find out. Sure. Mom and Dad would tell him not to say anything, but I couldn't trust him not to accidentally let it slip when my friends were around. Grace, on the other hand, was probably too observant. There would be a lot of laundry needing to be done before the pull-ups were purchased, and even if she didn't notice on the first night, she was bound to catch on. But I felt I could count on her discretion, given that she would know all too well what it was like to be dealing with that issue. We had actually never had a conversation before about her bedwetting. I had never been bold enough to bring it up with her. And it was one of those random topics that never had a natural chance to be asked about. She would have been sure to wonder why I was interested in it all of a sudden. "You're looking a little lost there." I snapped out of my daydream. Grace was standing next to the kitchen table again. "I'm fine," I lied. "I, um, I'm just working it out in my head." Grace stared down at the empty worksheet. "You don't know what you're doing, do you?" I sighed. "Not one bit." Grace pulled up a chair and sat down next to me. Her voice switched to an awful, gravelly Italian accent. "I can do that homework for you, but someday, and that day may never come, I will call upon you to do a service for me." I stared at her blankly. What kind of drugs was my older sister on? Grace sighed and rolled her eyes as she leaned back in her chair. "The best movie quotes are wasted on the young." That still didn't make a lick of sense. "Look, I'll give you the answers," Grace said. "That wasn't fair to give you this hard of an assignment. It's nearly summer. It's time to relax, but there might be something I'll need you to help me out with later." "What's that?" I asked. "Don't know yet. But if there is, you need to do it for me, OK?" I looked at her a little suspiciously. Grace wasn't one to play pranks on me. At least, not on any day other than the first of April. But the fact that she wasn't willing or able to tell me was slightly ominous. On the other hand... I looked back down at all the still unanswered questions. It would be nice to get an "A+" for once. I reached to hand Grace the pencil, but she waved my hand away. "Oh no. You still need to write the answers down. Has to look like you actually did it." Further proof that Grace was the smart sister. She had a valid point. My handwriting was like chicken scratch compared to her elegant calligraphy. Grace walked me through each of the half-dozen Algebra questions. She didn't just spit out an answer for me right away, even though it was clear that this assignment was as easy for her as it would be for me to go back to doing my third-grade math homework. "Let me see your nails," Grace said. I held out my hand. She placed hers next to mine. The difference was night and day. The edges of my nails were rough and uneven, a result of how I often picked at them mindlessly during my classes or other times when I was bored. Her's were perfectly manicured, colored with lavender nail polish. "You need to stop picking at them like that," Grace said, taking a close look at my fingers. Embarrassed, I pulled my hand away from hers. "I can't help it," I muttered. Ten minutes later, we were all done. I couldn't wait to see the look on Mr. Thompson's face when he would have to hand the assignment back to me with an A+ written on it. "Thanks! You're the best," I said, as Grace got up from the table. I gave my sister a hug. "Not a problem," Grace said. "Just don't forget your side of the deal." All the water I had drunk was beginning to have its desired result. I made it to the bathroom with plenty of time to spare. I sat and peed for what felt like forever. I remembered reading something about how the color of your urine could determine if you were hydrated enough. Mine was practically clear from how much I'd had to drink. I wished more than anything that I was peeing into one of those pull-ups instead. I tried so hard to imagine what it would feel like. None of my attempts at makeshift diapers had ever been remotely successful, so I was left to ponder what that experience would be like. I hopefully wouldn't have to wonder about it for much longer. As long as I continued to drink up through my soccer game and the rest of the evening, I would be fully prepared to wet the bed tonight. Now I just needed to figure out what Grace wanted from me in exchange for doing my homework. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com

Who of you wore tights in your childhood? I live Poland, in '80 and '90 children tights was very common and popular clothing for boys and girls. I also wore them and i hate them because seams to me ro girlish. They were worn from early fall to late spring. I usualy wore them under my pants at home, outside and to school. I know other kids often wore tights without pants at home especialy boys as normal home clothing. I never do that. Of course, my parents and grandparents wanted me to walk like that, but I was embaress and refuse. This was because tights were cheaper than pants. I teased in school many times because of tights when I'm must change before PE and many boys did. I wore them until I was 12 and never again until 2021. Later I wore disgusting long johns call "kalesony" until i discovered thermal underwear. Now kids and adults wear tights as a underwear, sport uniform or casual with shorts. Me to? I recently bought 3 pairs (photo) of ski tights. These are children's tights but they come in large ones so they fit me.

Not relevant to someone who told his prospective bride that he was incontinent and diapered before popping the question. My first marriage ended in divorce, but this had nothing to do with it. I have been widowed twice, and changed their diapers at the end hopefully with the same grace that they tolerated my diapered state and occasional two year old tantrums. My partner of the last seven years is just as supportive, and takes on the diapering chores without complaint when a sciatica attack makes it very difficult for me to manage on my own. Guys, you are making a major league mistake if you hide something at the core of your personality from your significant other. What you are saying is that you don't trust her-- and without trust, any relationship is doomed.

I wonder where did you stay in Poland? What were those years? How was it? In my childhood days, I wore plain, brown, beige tights. There were probably other colors, but I don't remember them. I have never worn typical girl tights, they were unisex. Even so, the boys at school were teasing me a lot. Once in PE lesson, when I wanted to hide my tights under my sweat pants, one bully dropped them down to my ankles, revealing the tights . After this incident, I didn't wear tights anymore to school. The day of PE lessons was a nightmare for boys in tights. Before the lesson, you had to change into exercise clothes, including taking off your tights. It was a dream opportunity for school bullies. Some of us learned to put on shorts under tights and then take them off with pants, which was difficult. Others took them down the toilet before PE lessons. Times have changed. Tights are worn more and more willingly by kids and adults, especially as sportswear. Now I wish I had wanted to wear them more often. Yesterday I will buy another pair as in the picture.

Ahhh yes. Going to the bathroom in the pants. ? Toddlers, and big boys who aren't ready to be big boys, often hide when they do their business in their britches. They exist in a twilight world of infancy vs childhood. They want to please mommy by being "big boys" but the urge to go in the pants is overwhelming for some. As they play, they feel the familiar fullness in their tummy, but ignore it and continue playing until the bowels begin to move. They then take a few steps toward the kitchen, to tell their mommy that they need to go potty. This is the moment of decision. This is the fork in the road. To the right; is mommy, the potty chair, and the world of big boys with big boy things. To the left; is going in your pants like a baby in diapers, the world of powdered bottoms and babyish things. It is the world of mommy changing your pants; rather than taking you to the potty chair. In mid-step, on the way to tell mommy, his full bowels and his still-infantile mind makes the decision for him. He pauses in mid-step, as his bowels begin to move, and eagerly grunts his breakfast into the seat of his pants. Rather then being embarrassed and ashamed after the first grunt, the "big boy" pushes again, feeling his training pants balloon out with a huge warm mess as he grunts. He relaxes his bladder in between grunts, as he soaks the front of his training pants with pee, as he fills the back of his pants with poop. As the telltale odor of poop wafts up from his bottom, he knows that his mother will return him to diapers and rubber pants, but this is what he wants: he wants to be a baby again. This is what it means to be an "adult baby." This is the beginning of our life in diapers ?

Gonna be a fun day at the park! _______________________________________ Chapter 32 Part 1 “I don’t mind staying home with you. You sure you wanna go,” Becky asked. “Yes, definitely. I’ve been either at home or daycare for two weeks.” “Sorry, but …” “I know, I know: I was a very sick little boy,” he smiled. “You mentioned that a few times.” Jamie suspect she was more traumatized by it than he was. Once he was out of the woods she had been a lot more emotive, and there was hardly a time she let him be alone. If she was doing something her bedroom, she picked up whatever Jamie was playing with, and Jamie, and brought them to her bedroom. If she went somewhere, she told Amanda to keep an eye on him, as though she didn’t anyway. Jamie was sympathetic and even found it endearing, but it was wearing thin. “Well, Lauren and Danny are looking forward to seeing you, and Amanda says Mel is going to be there, too.” Jamie remembered that, and he looked forward to it. He didn’t get to see her the week after his illness, or as he took to calling, his Plague Experience. “I know. What are we celebrating again?” “It’s not exactly a celebration. Just a parade and a fair in the park.” Mel and an affair in the park – Jamie liked the sound of that. “We watch the parade and eat funnel cake and play rigged games.” Giant carnies – Jamie liked that part less. “Amanda is going to meet us up there.” They drove into the historic downtown part of their leafy suburb and parked at a brick building that looked like it didn’t belong in in a residential neighborhood. Out front was assign reading “Pancake Dinner Every Tuesday!” “What’s that,” Jamie asked. “It’s the Cayuga Club. It’s a group of people, mostly older men, who volunteer in the community and raise money for things.” “Oh.” A lot of people were around, all like water in a stream flowing to the same destination. Rebecca got Jamie out of his car seat and put him in the stroller. She’d already lathered him with sunblock before they left the house. She grabbed the diaper bag and stashed it below, then handed Jamie a big water bottle to keep with him. He’d been draining six a day even though he wasn’t dehydrated anymore. They started walking in the same direction of the crowd. Every age; littles; bigs; what passed for a dog here. Becky steered them onto a street Jamie didn’t think he’d been on before, just a block over from where they’d gone to lunch with Jane and Rosie. The street was wide and divided by grassy islands. “That one’s ours,” she said, pointing at the one she was beelining for. “We got tickets?” “No, there are not tickets. That’s just where we’ve sat since as long as I can remember. Right in front of the reviewing stand.” Behind the reviewing stand was train station. Small, old, and charming, it looked more like a small-town train station museum than a working station. Lauren was already there waiting for them with chairs set up. “Hey!” she exclaimed when she saw them. She unbuckled Jamie before Becky even stopped and picked him, pressing him to her chest as he wrapped his legs around her and she swung him back and forth saying, “There’s my big guy!” The train station swang out of sight and the next island over in, and then the train station again, then the island again. “Lauren … Lauren … Lauren!” “Oh, sorry! I just got carried away. I’m so glad to see you out and about. How are you feeling?” “Better. Much better.” “You had everyone so worried!” Jamie rolled his eyes. “You were just … so …” she started to get teary and snapped out of it. “Well, you’re fine now. That’s the important thing. And how are you,” she asked, turning to Rebecca. “Fine. Rested,” she laughed. “You know what they say: you’re only ever as happy as your least happy child. Thanks again for coming over that week. Much needed break.” “Don’t mention it. I was happy to.” “Where’s Danny?” “Getting breakfast,” Lauren said pointing to a line half a block long snaking its way out of a pastry shop. Danny eventually made his way back with a box of donuts big enough to be cakes by Jamie’s standards. “Hey! Look at you all conscious and shit,” he said. “Daniel!” Lauren gave him a shot in the ribs. “Oof! Uh, meant to say you’re looking good. Donut?” “Becky,” Lauren asked. “Sure. He’s back on regular food.” Lauren broke out some paper towels and handed one to Jamie and one to Becky. Danny handed Becky a donut the size of a sub sandwich and Jamie a smaller one that he hoped was little food. “Danny,” Lauren whined, “You can’t just give him the whole thing,” she said, taking it from Jamie and tearing it into smaller-than-bite-sized pieces. “Uh, Laurie,” Danny said, looking from Lauren to Jamie, hinting with his eyes. “Oh! What am I thinking. Sorry,” she blushed. Becky watched the exchange with a curious smile. Danny sat down next to Becky. “I called Mom and told her not to come.” “And?” “And she said didn’t plan on it.” Becky sighed. “I don’t want to see her, but I hate to think of her all by herself.” What, Jamie thought, the other fascists banned her from their meetings? Danny cast his eyes down for a second and then took Becky’s hand. “You did the right thing for you and for Jamie and for Amanda. That’s the important thing, right?” “Right.” She patted Danny’s hand and smiled. “Hey!” Jamie’s ears perked up at Amanda’s. “Ooh, donuts!” He twisted around in his chair to see Amanda and Mel helping themselves. “Bikini season is over; go nuts.” “Go donuts,” Jamie said with an idiotic smile on his face. Lamest person ever, Jamie thought, that’s you. Fortunately it didn’t seem anyone heard him. “Hey, Jamie. Remember me,” Donna said, stepping out from behind Mel and Amanda. “Hi, Donna. Good to see you again.” “I heard you were feeling sick,” she said in a voice not quite normal and not quite babyish. “But you must be feeling better because you got a donut! Do you like donuts?” “Hey, Danny,” Jamie said, “Are these little donuts?” “Yeah. Why?” “I’m gonna need another, pretty much right away.” “I got your back. We’re dudes.” Lauren had brought a chair for Amanda; Mel and Donna spread out a blanket in from of their chairs. Jamie wondered if he should or not. It wouldn’t be very nice to Donna. But Mel would like it. Maybe he could make it up to Donna later. Though it was a little shameless. “I’ll share my chair with you, Mel.” “You will? That’s so sweet of you. I can’t say no to that,” she said, turning to mouth ‘sorry’ to Donna. She picked Jamie up and sat down in his place, then set him in her lap. He leaned back into her as the announcer on the reviewing stand welcome them to the annual Founder’s Day parade and fair. The first float was from a grade school, and parents and teachers and kids walked by tossing out candy. Despite himself, seeing a roving gang of young children made Jamie nervous. They were followed by the high school marching band; a car dealership; a real estate agency; more schools; another band; a dance company; a group of older gentlemen and one woman intent on keeping the bagpipe alive in our modern world; a martial arts studio that was running out of wood to break as they reached almost the end of the route; more car dealers; a competing real estate agency; giant men in fezzes driving comically tiny cars, except there were the perfect size for a little to drive; giant men in a classic car club riding in what Jamie guessed were classic cars; what looked like a scout troop, including one mounted scout riding a gigantic horse, followed by a sweaty scout master wheeling a gigantic trash can and shovel; a veterans group; police on motorcycle, and a titanic-sized fire engine that blew its horn and set half the littles and young kids crying. When it was over, everyone stood up and started folding away their chairs and blankets and detritus. Jamie yawned and stretched his arms. “Ya tired, Jamester?” “Nah,” he lied. “Just need to get up and walk around a bit.” Mel set him on his feet and the group started walking toward the park, stopping to put things back in their cars. When they reached the park it looked transformed. The big space was filled with tents side by side filled with vendors art and crafts and clothes and holiday decorations. “Same stuff every year,” Becky said. “They’ve had that spot for as long as I can remember,” Amanda replied, pointing toward a booth right next to the crosswalk selling leather goods. “That’s what I like about it. Tradition.” They walked into the first aisle, and Jamie discovered they weren’t just casually passing through to see what there was, but were instead looking through each booth. Danny looked as bored as he did. “Ya wanna get out of here,” he asked. “Yeah,” “Hey, Beck, how about I take Jamie to find some guy stuff to do?” “Ok by me. Jamie,” Becky asked. “Sounds like fun.” “Alright. Watch him like a hawk, Daniel Allen.” Big sister meant it. Lauren giggled. “Ya know, Dan, if he goes you might actually have to change a diaper for once in your life.” “Hardy har har. Let’s go, Jamie. We can cruise chicks and hit up the hatchet throwing booth,” he said, taking the stroller from Amanda. They backtracked to the sidewalk that ran past the length of the tennis courts near where they came in. To the left was a sea of people. They started to work their way into it. Danny had a firm grip on Jamie’s hand. “Would you feel better if I rode in the stroller,” Jamie shouted. Danny nodded and lifted him in. The crowd parted more easily. This was apparently the food boulevard, set along both sides of the main sidewalk through the park. Typic fair fare. “Do you smell that, Jamie?” “What? Heart disease?” “And I suppose you’re too good for a little heart disease?” “No, just pacing myself. It’s still early.” They came out of pike, and to Jamie’s familiar playground. The last time he’d been here he’d cause a diplomatic row with one of those barbarian countries, or at least that’s how he thought of them, not that he’d ever applied the term to anyone or any place back home. He had more sympathy for cannibals in far flung jungles than for people who tortured and mutilated littles. “This is the do-gooder section,” Danny informed him, able to speak in a regular tone again. They walked past various charities with their booths set up, well-meaning people handing out flyers and information. Jamie talked to each one. He was naturally interested, and since he didn’t watch or read news it was also the first time he heard about some of the issues going on in his area. Of course, he couldn’t contribute anything but a thank you, though that seemed to be much more valuable to these people than any donation. He did, though, take a flyer from each one and stash it behind him in his stroller. At the end of the section was a pet adoption booth with animals in kennels on the ground looking pathetic, or at least as pathetic as a bear can look. “You want to check them out,” Danny asked. “Sure,” Jamie answered. He didn’t want to seem afraid in front of Daniel, which he knew was silly, but he felt that way just the same. They slowly made their way around the circle of pens. A tall woman in a gaudy living-things-love-me-and-I-love-them outfit stopped them. “You looking for a puppy for your son?” “No. And actually he’s just my nephew. He’s a recent arrival, so this is still pretty new to him.” “Oh. Does he want to maybe see one?” “I don’t know. Jamie, do you?” “Uh, sure.” There was a cage between him and them. Jamie got out of his stroller, and the three of them went through a gate into the center of the circle. They followed the woman to one of the cages where a small, by bear standards, black and white was. Danny and the woman got down on their knees next to Jamie, each with a hand on his back, and showed him it was safe by putting their palms on the cage. “See,” the woman said as the dog licked her palm, “she’s very gentle.” Jamie put his palm up to the cage slowly. He laughed when it licked him. “It tickles.” “What’s her name,” Daniel asked. “Muffin.” “That’s good,” Jamie said, “Because, ya know, she looks like a muffin.” “You want to let her out?” “Uh, no, I think that’s okay. She seems so happy … in there … doing her thing … in there.” “Then do you want to meet another?” “Sure.” They moved on to the next cage. Jamie put his hand to the bars, and the dog didn’t stir. This one actually looked content to be where it was. Jamie felt a heavy thump on this butt. “Hey! What was that for,” Jamie ask indignantly. “Oh, Bruno! How do you keep getting out,” the woman asked with exasperation. Jamie heard a long sniff and turned slightly to see Bruno with his snout an inch from Jamie’s butt. Jamie turned around and sat back. He could feel the bear’s breath from two feet away. “Now that’s a dog,” Daniel said excitedly. Judging by the size of the open cage, Bruno was the biggest one they had. Jamie felt himself sweating and his heart rate accelerate. The woman noticed. “It’s okay; he’s safe. He’s very gentle with littles. See?” She gently took Jamie’s hand and pull it closer to Bruno’s snout. Jamie was shaking. Bruno sniffed Jamie’s hand and exhaled with a blow that made Jamie pull his hand back. “Do you want to ride him?” Jamie reacted appropriately to the inquiry. “No!” “C’mon, Jamie. It’ll help you get over your fear of dogs.” “This one, too,” the woman asked. “So strange.” “I’m right here, and Bruno looks like a pussycat to me. Do you trust me,” Danny asked with his hand out. “You? Sure. Bears? Not so much.” “Honey,” the woman said, “This is a doggy.” “You’re a doggy,” Jamie said. I don’t even know what that means, he thought. “No, see,” she said, petting Bruno, “This is a doggy. A nice doggy.” “It’s alright, Jamester. Promise.” Daniel started to pick Jamie up. Jamie’s instinct to get away from the giant and the bear was locked in a struggle with his instinct to seem cool in front of Danny. He resisted only verbally. “Nah, really I’m good,” as Danny got his hands under Jamie’s arms. “Seriously, I’d rather not.” His feet were off the ground. “I said no.” Bruno was underneath him. “No means no! No means no!” I am sitting on a bear, Jamie said to himself. Maybe they have some prehistoric bulls I can run with or a megalodon to use as a bath toy. “See,” the woman said, “He doesn’t mind at all.” Jamie gave her the dirtiest look he could muster. “Interesting, that him minding seems to be your major concern. Daniel Allen, please get me down.” Daniel realized what a mistake he’d made and hurriedly complied. “Uh, thank you, miss. I think we’ve seen all we need to.” Jamie was already walking toward the gate. Daniel caught up with him. “Sorry. I didn’t realize how strongly you felt about it.” “It’s not about the bear.” “Sorry … you, uh, wanna get a beer?” “I can do that?” “Well, if you don’t tell, I won’t.” Daniel got a beer an extra cup for “water,” and the two of them sat at an empty picnic table. “I didn’t … sorry.” “You said that. Look …” Jamie still hadn’t figured out a way to say this to folks without getting angry or hurting their feelings or both. He wanted to empower people to feel confident they could interact with him person-to-person, not frighten or guilt them into treating him with kid gloves. “We can talk about it some other time.” Jamie took a drink and immediately felt tipsy. He hadn’t touched a drop since before his departure, almost half a year ago, and big beer, he could tell, had a lot more alcohol in it. “Wow,” he coughed. “That’ll put hair back on your chest.” It only took a few minutes for Jamie’s tongue to loosen. “So,” he said, “When are you gonna tell everyone Aunt Lauren is pregnant?” Daniel did a double take and unconvincingly tried to deflect. “What? She’s not … you know … your beer is, is what that question is.” Jamie ticked off on his finger, “She was emotional two weeks ago. She was emotional this morning. She was treating me like an infant. And despite her effort to hide it, she has an acne breakout on her left cheek. Hormones, hormones, baby fever, and hormones.” “I haven’t seen any acne.” “Well, your face wasn’t right here,” Jamie said, indicating with his hand how close she’d held him that morning. “You’re not gonna say anything to Becky or Amanda, right? We’re not ready to say anything yet.” “None of my business. I won’t tell anyone.” “Thank you.” “How long is a pregnancy anyway?” “18 months.” “Oh, well, I guess that give you time to paint and everything.” Daniel waved. Jamie turned around to see Amanda, Mel and Donna standing in line. They waved back. “Better finish that.” Jamie polished off the last couple swallows, and Daniel placed the cup under the table. He grinned at Jamie. “So, you got a thing for Mel.” “Yeah, a little.” “Well, you’re not alone. But nothing can come of it, you know?” “I know,” Jamie sighed. “I like her company, though, and I think she likes mine. And a little harmless physical affection …” “I get it. Not so much Donna though?” “She’s just a bit overbearing. She means well, but, well, I guess it’s obvious.” His body was absorbing more of the alcohol. He missed this feeling. No as good as those cookies but pretty damn close. “Yeah. You could say that. Here they are.” He stood up. “Hey, we saved you seats.” Donna managed to sit next to Jamie, with Amanda on the other side and Mel next to Donna. “You guys having fun,” Amanda asked. “Yeah. Uh, what did we do? Oh! We hit on those single moms who thought I was a single dad. Always a treat, right, Jamester?” Amanda was about to laugh, and then Jamie joined in. “Oh yeah, just like old times for me,” Jamie played along. He saw Amanda’s face narrow. “Uh oh.” Too late, a little voice in his head said, she’s seen you! Quietly enough not to be head but loud enough to make it clearly to Daniel how pissed she was, Amanda leaned across the table and said, “You gave him beer!?!” “What,” Daniel tried to play it off. “That’s … that’s my beer.” “Then why is it on his breath!” Amanda said, the sentence coming out as a single word. “Oh my god!” Donna jumped up, smacked her knee on the table, fell back to her seat, and jumped up again. “We have to go to the hospital! We need to call poison control! He’ll need a liver test! What it he’s already addicted!” Daniel looked at her like he was watching a parody of a farce. Mel put her hand on Donna’s shoulder and pulled her back down. Amanda told her to shut up. Jamie wasn’t feeling much pain and leaned across the table. “You know, Danny, I don’t think … we didn’t think this through … very, not very well. “He’s drunk!” Amanda stage-shouted. Mel kept one hand on Donna’s shoulder and kept her face in the other, laughing so hard she was crying. “Manda, big sis, I’ve been drunk before and this is ... is … you got a point, is what you have.” “I didn’t think he was such a lightweight,” Danny said before Amanda cut him off. “Daniel Allen! He’s five-and-a-half-feet tall!” “Ha!” Jamie honked. “That’s the third time someone’s called you by both names today.” “Mom is gonna kill you. If Aunt Laurie doesn’t first.” Yeah, you never wanna piss off a pregnant wife this bad, Jamie thought, not drunk enough to say it out loud. Amanda picked Jamie up. “And his shorts are wet!” “Well, sure,” Jamie said, “Happens sometimes to everybody sometimes when they’ve had a few too many sometimes.” He snorted at his own joke. Mel still hadn’t said a word, but squeals of laughter were escaping around her palm. Donna was on the verge of hyperventilating. Amanda sighed. “Mel, can you go get Jamie a soda and some little peppermint ice cream. And maybe a paper bag for Donna. Mom and Laurie were looking at some lawn ornaments or something. Maybe we can hide this.” “Woah,” Donna righteously but at least not loudly said, “I’m not okay with that. Your mom needs to know!” “Hey Donna,” Jamie said with a smoother voice than he could ever manage sober, “If you promise not to say anything, you can change my diaper and feed me that ice cream.” “Okay!” Amanda rolled her eyes so hard the springs almost broke. Mel went on her errand. “Well, Daniel, now would be the time to offer him some smokes and a hooker.” “I don’t smoke,” Jamie answered, cracking himself up. Amanda sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Daniel, go find Mom and Aunt Laurie and stall them or something.” She handed Donna the diaper bag from under the stroller and Jamie from her hip. “Less than five minutes, please. There’s a change of clothes in there. his shirt, too, not just his shorts.” The line at the bathroom being quite long, Donna headed for a shade tree. Jamie wasn’t feel especially inhibited. Whether trying to help the situation or wanting to show how good she was at it, she kept it short but managed to get in a tummy raspberry, which Jamie found unusually hilarious even as the buzz was wearing off. “Good as new,” Donna reported when she brought him back. Mel was already back, having cut the line by declaring it an ice cream emergency. Donna held the cup up, and Jamie took a long couple pulls on the caffeine. Donna prepared a spoonful of ice cream. “Here comes the airplane …” My god, she’s a piece of work, Jamie, Amanda, and Mel simultaneously thought. “Donna! Tick tock. Just cover the smell, please.” Donna grimaced but did as she was told, making sure Jamie got plenty around his mouth, and Jamie helped out by rubbing it along his gums with his tongue. “Sorry, Manda,” he said. “Did you know how strong the beer was?” “Well, I figured it out after a few swallows.” “So you’re not 100% blameless but for your sake and Daniel’s sake we’re gonna pretend you are. But if this ever happens again you will sleep standing in the corner, buster. For a month.” “Argh,” Jamie said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Brain freeze? Well, that’s your punishment.” “All done,” Donna announced like she was now having a great time. “Thank you.” Jamie started to get drowsy. Mel saw him wobble a bit. “Maybe mixing little food and alcohol wasn’t the best idea.” “It’s perfect. If Mom asks why he’s being goofy we can blame the ice cream,” she responded. “But a nap is a good idea anyway. Best if you’re asleep when they find us.” She adjusted the stroller for him to lay flat, laid him in, and pulled the canopy over him. “Hey, Manda?” “What?” “A lot of drama happens at this park.” That was the straw that broke the camel’s back for Amanda, who couldn’t help laughing. She kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll wake you up in an hour.”

Part 13 April didn't say a word on the way to the car, or as she buckled me into the carseat. There was no music on the drive home. I sucked loudly on the pacifier and watched her eyes closely in the mirror, but they didn't smile. She didn't even say a word as she unbuckled me and carried me inside, she just sat down on the couch and pulled me into her lap and held me tight. I wasn't sure what was going on.. I felt a little scared. Did I mess up? I didn't really do anything wrong.. that boy called me a crybaby and I got upset. I know I wasn't supposed to yell, but I didn't curse. I didn't throw anything or hit anyone, why was April reacting this way?April pulled her phone out and tapped a few buttons, and suddenly I was on the TV, being held by Miss Michelle. The Little boy came up and pulled on Miss Michelle's leg... but he was blurred out and you couldn't hear him. Miss Michelle was visible and audible, and so was I, but the Little boy wasn't."I. Am. Not," I saw myself say. I watched as Miss Michelle gently rocked me and tried to calm me down... in her arms, I did look like a baby. I looked so small being cradled by her, and my diaper flashed the camera from under my romper as she rocked me, "I'm not a crybaby, I'm not!""Oh dear," I saw Miss Michelle get up and carry me over to the cribs, the crowd of blurred out Littles were impossible to make out, but you could tell they were agitated. The other Amazon caretakers looked to be in a mild panic as they tried to keep everyone calm until the TV was on."No! No swaddle!" my scream came from the TV, visceral.. so intense it made me flinch. The me on the TV thrashed wildly... and it looked like the TV-me tried to bite Miss Michelle... and then I watched the Little me fall unconscious in Miss Michelle's grasp. The other Amazons gave a sigh of relief at the abrupt end to the temper tantrum and Miss Michelle gently put the pacifier in the sleeping-me's mouth.The video froze there, and suddenly I realized that I felt tears burning behind my eyes. I had no idea what was going to happen next.. April pulled me tighter and squeezed me. Her heart was beating so fast. I was confused."Oh Kimmy..." I heard her say, it sounded like she was crying, "oh Kimmy, we are so lucky that Miss Michelle likes you."I tried to look up at her, but she was holding me too tightly."Where did I go wrong?" her pained question came from above and my whole body was flooded with guilt, "Have I given you too much freedom? Treated you too much like an Amazon child? Too much like an Amazon? Oh Kimmy, I love you so much, I don't know what to do."She backed the video up to the frame that showed me twisting, my teeth bared at Miss Michelle's hand."Miss Michelle saw this," she said, "She knew. We are so, so lucky. You can't go back to LittleGarden until we have this under control, Kimmy. If you had bitten her... if you assaulted an Amazon caretaker.. they," she sobbed, "they would have forcibly regressed you, permanently." She squeezed me so tightly it hurt, "Lisa's hypnotic trigger may have saved you after all, Kimmy. Am I a bad mommy? Should I have been more strict? I thought that if I showed you my love, made you understand... you'd realize your place and everything would be all right. I almost lost you today."My tears were flowing freely now, I didn't even understand why I had gotten so upset at being called "crybaby", it all seemed so stupid now that I saw it on the screen.April turned me so I was facing her, "You were a bad girl today, Kimmy," she said, and my heart broke into a million little pieces. I started bawling uncontrollably. "I am very disappointed in you." If she hadn't been holding me up, I would have collapsed in a heap at that. I don't think April had ever expressed disapproval at me in any way. What if she didn't love me any more? Tears were streaming down April's face... was she going to give me away? I loved her.. in that moment of fear, that moment that I thought I might lose her, I realized just how much I loved her. I didn't want her to go away!"Oh my little Kimmy, how can I make you understand?" she hugged me tightly, and then looked me in the eyes again. She grabbed a tissue, supporting me with one arm as I leaned back in her lap. She wiped my eyes and nose, and then her own eyes. She looked deeply into my eyes, and I into hers - I hung on her every breath, "I love you, Kimmy. I love you so much, I knew from the very first moment that I held you in my arms that I would love you forever. I'm too emotionally compromised right now to explain to you the severity of what went wrong today. I am too scared and too upset, any decision I make right now is suspect."She smiled suddenly, "The irony just hit me. Littles just don't have the ability to recognize their own disregulated emotions, that's the entire problem," she kissed me on the head. "We need to get some food in both of us, I missed lunch due to recording today."April stood up and carried me to the kitchen, I was still weeping but I had calmed down a bit when she said "I love you", I wasn't scared she was going to get rid of me any more, but I still didn't know what was going to happen. April sat me down in the highchair and snapped the tray in place."I'm going to make us some food. I think you're too upset to eat carefully, so your dinner is going to be formula tonight," she stroked my cheek, "you are not being punished with formula, I just don't want you to choke. I'm going to take your paci out, but you are not to talk, okay? Show me that you're a good Little, don't say a single word, okay?"I nodded and she removed the pacifier. My need to tell her how much I loved her was incredibly strong, I wanted to say how sorry I was, that I didn't mean it, that I'd do better... it was so hard to keep quiet.April made herself a quick dinner, some kind of fish and vegetables, and I got a bottle of formula which I drank without complaint. We ate in silence, but it wasn't a tense silence.. April didn't seem upset anymore, she was calm and collected. I was miserable, but I stayed quiet.After dinner, April carried me into the nursery where I learned that my diaper was soaked. I had been so upset, I never even noticed going.. or that it was wet at all. She put me in another thick nighttime diaper and the sleeper outfit with the mittens, the one that zipped from behind. She put me down in the crib where I sat, dumbfounded. I had assumed I would get to sleep in her bed again, I liked her warmth, her heartbeat, her smell. She walked out without saying goodnight... I collapsed and started bawling again.She came back in with Harry Otter, put him in my arms and stroked my hair."Oh my precious Little, I'm sorry I didn't recognize my emotions more quickly. Your mommmy isn't perfect, I get big feelings sometimes too. You poor thing, you had a rough day despite my best efforts. Goodnight my Kimmy, get some rest. Tomorrow is a new day. I love you."She walked out quietly and I croaked, "I love you too," my voice hoarse from crying.I was asleep within minutes.--I awoke the next morning still clutching Harry Otter tightly. I was still in the crib, it wasn't all a bad dream. I couldn't do much at all with the mittens, so I sat up and hugged Harry Otter."Oh Harry, I messed up," I told him, "Why do I keep losing control? I've been called much worse in my life than 'crybaby'." I sighed and poked my diaper. It was dry, that was good at least.. in a way. I still had nighttime control even if I went to bed upset. I was a little troubled by my lack of control yesterday evening, but I honestly couldn't remember feeling that upset at any previous point in my life. So I gave myself a pass. I relaxed and flooded the diaper anyway, it wasn't like I had another choice."Harry, we need to show everyone that we can be friends with Littles. Why wouldn't I be able to? They're just like me. They were adults, now they're trapped in a world where they're treated like a baby.. I have something big in common with every single one of them, how hard could it be?" I propped Harry up and said to him, "Hello there miss, I like your dress. It hides your diaper well."Harry didn't reply and I sighed, "Hello mister, how long have these giants forced you to wear diapers? Have you lost count of the days yet? What's your favorite baby toy?"My attempt to encourage myself was backfiring. The one thing we all had in common was helplessness, how do you bond over that in a way that doesn't make you resentful?"Good morning, beautiful girl," April was smiling as she walked in, "I thought I heard you chattering in here. Is Harry keeping you company?"I was conflicted. On the one hand, I was really happy that she was in a good mood and part of me wanted to play along and pretend that nothing was wrong, on the other hand... something was wrong. We still had a lot to talk about from the previous night, and pretending like everything was okay seemed like a bad idea."April, I..", I started, wanting to address the problem head-on in a mature way.. but I didn't get any farther, the pacifier was quickly in my mouth and inflated."I see someone is still fussy, that's okay. We had a lot of big feelings yesterday, didn't we?"She picked me up and carried me over to the changing table to get me ready for the day. The sleeper was removed and she squeezed my diaper... and did something very un-April-like."You're barely wet," she said, "we'll change you after a while."I always got a morning change - even if the diaper was dry, I got a morning change into a daytime diaper. This was a bad sign. Was I losing some closeness with April? I didn't even get a dress today, or shortalls.. April just pulled on a t-shirt that read, "Full of Love" and carried me to the living room. April sat on the couch and sat me on her lap."Kimmy," she said, "You are a Little. Your whole job in this life is to have fun, play, and be happy. That's it. You know you weren't happy in your old world, you were sad, you were tired, you were sick. You have..."She was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell. I hoped it was Lisa... I hadn't seen Lisa in a while and I missed her. She made April happy, and she was around when I started growing closer to April. I had to remember how I was getting close to her before so I could get there again, I wanted her to understand that I loved her back.. for real, with a real, deep emotion. This is what I was thinking to myself from the confines of the playpen where April had deposited me while she answered the door."Hello," she said cheerfully, "Oh I wasn't expecting any.. yes, thank you. Right here? Okay, thank you! Have a nice day."She closed the door and carried in a medium sized box.. and by medium size, I mean I would fit in it easily. The Littles Shopping Network logo was on the side. I started to panic."What did mom send now?" April asked as she set the box down and started opening it. "Oh right, I told her it was okay to buy this. It's actually really good timing."I clung to the side of the playpen and strained to see what was in the box, but I couldn't. April carried it toward the kitchen and I was left alone. I suddenly felt mad at myself. April had been starting to trust me more, I had been getting more freedom. She had been letting me wander the house instead of keeping me trapped in the swing or the playpen, but here I was again. I brooded while April was away, I didn't feel like playing with any of the toys in the playpen. She was gone for quite a while, from the kitchen I heard the sounds of small tools being used.. she must be assembling something. Something from the Littles Shopping Network, something her mother bought. All of this together pretty much guaranteed I wouldn't like it."Okay, Kimmy - let's try out your new present," April said happily as she carried me toward the kitchen. In the doorway between the kitchen and the living room was... a bouncer, hung from the doorframe. Yet another method of confinement. I didn't complain as she settled me down in the jumper and adjusted the tension. The fabric held the thick nighttime diaper to me closely, my legs dangled in the legholes, splayed completely apart with my toes barely touching the ground. "Okay sweetie, jump for me."I bounced helplessly in the bouncer... Actually, I got some decent height on the jumps, it was kind of like jumping on a trampoline.. except that it held you up by the crotch and made you constantly aware that you wore diapers. Otherwise it was exactly like a trampoline. This was basically the direct opposite of the freedom I was trying to earn back."There, now you can get a little more exercise while I work around the house, and I can talk to you while I prepare things in the kitchen without you being trapped in the highchair. I prefer to keep that just for mealtimes. Isn't grandma thoughtful?"I tried desperately to push the pacifier out of my mouth so I could play along, make things right again.. but it was in firmly. Instead I just held up my arms and opened and closed my hands, which had worked before. April smiled and picked me up."Oh, someone is still feeling a little needy, huh? Okay, let's stay close." April cradled me in her arms and rocked me, "I am your mommy, it is my job to take care of you. To make sure you are clothed, fed, and cared for. My goal is to make you happy. Your job is to be happy. That's a pretty easy job, isn't it?" she tickled my tummy and I giggled around the paci. When she stopped, I nodded. "Can you do that, Kimmy? Can you just worry about being happy and stop worrying about all that other stuff?"When she put it that way, it did sound like a pretty easy job. Just be happy, right? April made me happy, it should be easy to be happy for her. I nodded and snuggled in her arms."Good, I was hoping we'd be able to come to an agreement on this. Now, I don't need to go in to record today, I got word that they're reviewing the previous days' recordings.. so it's just you and me. And I have an idea on what we can do." And then April sat me down on the couch all by myself.. she made sure my diapered butt was all the way against the back cushion, but still.. she left me on the couch, not the playpen, not the swing, not the new bouncer. That was a good sign. When she came back, she was carrying a tiny guitar in each hand, like the one I had been playing with on the coffee table the other night. She sat one of them in my lap and held the other one close to her body, sitting down on the other side of the couch, facing me."Let's play some music," April smiled.