Kat5

We have reached a point where I thought the same thing specifically because I thought Guilend would think that. Guilend has become their own meme.

I don't really know how to express how much this means to me. I think I've said before that I had no real goal for this story. It was just in my head clawing at me to get out. And after a time I couldn't ignore it and just HAD to start writing it. And then I just stepped out of my comfort zone, and here we are. The fact that it brings a smile to someone's day means more to me than I ever really expected. I'm sorry that you have rough days, and I pray that you have calmer days with more smiles ahead. And thank you for sharing with me that this brought you some cheer. (Also the invasion happens in a few more chapters. Don't worry about it, its probably fine.) Also, as Littles we literally have a different point of view. Their entire society has assumed for countless generations that we are basically just... toddlers (at best) you can't just turn that off like a switch. The statement "From the mouths of Littles" being a direct parallel of the RL "From the mouths of children" is entirely purposeful. Thank you very kindly! I would like tonl say that it's just because I've been reading in the setting for some years and understand the setting, and not that I can relate to being vertically impaired and working with tall people on the regular. Or being in Second Life and the 'correct height while everyone else around me is sized like an actual Amazon. Thank you very kindly! Part of the idea behind the story is that not -all- Amazon's are horrible evil creatures. (Though there is no shortage of them!) But that in any society there will be statistical outliers. Misfits that don't fit into the mold that is expected by their society, and they have to put on a mask to go through their daily lives. (Wow, I just realized how much I can relate to that. Ouch.) The characters HAVE to blend in with the society around them. But like ones social battery, how long someone can keep up the act, and how hard of a toll it extracts varies from person to person. If there is any one moral that I could choose to share through this story, it would be to encourage the oddballs that don't fit in. Many of us know the struggle. And not being alone lightens the burden.

Let us not forget those that wake up cheerful and choose to use their powers for evil instead of giving us a stuffy, covering us back up and letting us sleep for another hour.

Chapter Thirty Nine “Argo.” Amanda started. “McDerpus” Mr. Mike finished over her shoulder. John nodded at them with a completely serious look on his face. Mommy turned and walked right outside without saying a word. Mike looked between Amanda and John and followed Amanda outside, not noticing that the child gate swung shut behind him. Now feeling confused, he walked over to the gate and looked at their shadows in the grass. Mommy’s shadow was doubled over and he could see the shadow of her arm over her mouth. And then he heard it. He could hear her snort. Then he heard her laugh. Then he saw Mr Mike’s shadow reach over and hold her up as she had a full blown laugh attack. The sound of laughter made him crack up again. And from the looks of it, Mr Mike was having a quiet laugh as well. Argo McDerpus was the perfect name. It was a couple of minutes before they came back in. Standing at the gate, he could swear he heard something with the words ‘adorable’ and ‘dork’ or maybe it was ‘adorkable.’ but it was impossible to tell for certain from around the corner and across the porch. When they finally came back in Mommy picked him up and squeezed him and his new stuffie together in a hug. She seemed to be just managing to keep a straight face as she explained “Mr Mike and I are going to spend a couple of hours working in the kitchen making tomato sauce and salsa. After lunch, and probably a nap, we’ll probably go for a walk. “ For his part, John simply nodded along. She continued “Do you want to help us, or draw or read or something else?” Looking back and forth between Mommy and Mr Mike, he really wanted to participate, but had no idea how he could. Plus he was a bit snacky. “I don’t know how I can help, but if there’s something I can do I will? Although I’m a bit hungry.” With a nod she ruffled his hair as carried him over toward the counter. With one arm holding him, and his arms holding Argo, she shuffled the chairs around with two facing the counter, and one of the chairs with the booster seat facing out, while the other was facing in so he could climb in and out on his own. Mommy stood him up on the chairs and pointed “Why don’t you put Argo *heh* McDerpus in the booster seat for safe keeping while we work. Nodding along John lined Argo up in the pink booster seat facing in and immediately realized that the stuffie was bigger than him because he had to shove and shimmy and work to wedge him into the booster. By the time he had Argo in the seat, he stood up to look across the counter to see Mr Mike taking a knife to an apple. Quickly making lots of vertical chops and then flicking the slice off of the apple with each pass. Now, John had never considered himself bad with a knife, but watching someone several times your size run a knife into an apple the size of a grapefruit, flick a slice off onto a plate with one quick motion and immediately doing it again tends to leave you with a bit of a sense of awe. Mr Mike slid the small plate over to him with a nod and he happily picked it up sat on the chair cross legged and started snacking on them. They were cold from the fridge, and crisp and crunchy. And frankly just sweet and oh so slightly tart. As far as Johns earth born taste buds were concerned, it was as good as candy. He barely registered as Mommy sat a sippy cup of juice next to him by leaning over the back of the chair. All told, he wound up spacing out for at least fifteen minutes in his own little world full of healthy snacks and 32oz of Plapple juice. There were some upsides to go with the downsides. He had this nagging sensation that the juice always seemed to make him have more accidents, but it was impossible to stop drinking it regardless. Eventually he stood up on the chair and looked at what was going on. Mr Mike was cutting tomatoes into eight pieces and filling a big glass pan with them. Some sort of leafy green stuff was waiting to be chopped. There were several onions, a measuring cup next to it, and a pile of peppers that would likely have reduced most sane people to a gibbering pile of mush. Mommy read the recipe off to Mr Mike again and he started chopping onions, while she looked directly over at John before taking the peppers over to the other counter to cut them far away from him. That felt like a great kindness, honestly. John propped his elbows up on the counter and watched the goings on, fairly content to just watch and listen for the moment. It was fascinating to watch the two giants passing ingredients back and forth. Mommy was reading a recipe card, and cleaning jars while getting a bunch of lids into a pot on the stove for some reason. While they each did their respective prep work, Mommy brought up the topic of expanding the fenced in yard and adding a green house. John found their conversation mildly interesting at best. Until she mentioned being able to grow strawberries nearly year round in the greenhouse. Then he listened more intently. After about ten minutes, and one finished cup of Plapple juice later, a large food processor was taken out. Probably big enough to hold a bit over a gallon. It didn’t look ‘huge’ but it was definitely ‘really big’ to John. All of the ingredients were mixed up in a giant bowl and some of the mixture was unceremoniously plopped into the food processor before the lid was twisted into place. Mr Mike nodded to John across the counter and said “Don’t worry big guy, your Mom’s making the first batch mild for you before we get to the spicy stuff. That way no residue gets left over to sneak in and make you burst into flame.” John nodded along, genuinely happy for that bit of insight. He hadn’t thought about the possibility until it was said out loud, but then the thought of salsa he couldn’t eat seemed concerning. The thing about food processors and blenders is that they are loud. Very loud, in fact. You never realize how loud they are until you turn one on. In this case, John realized how loud this food processor was the instant that Mr Mike twisted the giant dial to one side to make it pulse briefly. The instant the large food processor five feet from his head turned on, Johns feet left the chair he was standing on. Before he knew it, he was landing in a heap on the chair with his hands over his ears. He wasn’t screaming or making any noise, but for a brief moment he almost blurted out something that got him spanked and put back in time out. One moment later, Mommy was their reaching over the back of the chair and pulling him back upright. “Baby, are you okay!?” she asked in a panic. John looked up at her and answered quickly “I’ve changed my mind, may I sit on the porch and draw?” Shaking her head, she said “Yes sweety, let’s get you a comfy blankie and a pillow.” The next few moments were a bit of a blur for him, since Mr Mike came around the counter and carried him out to the porch where Mommy folded the comforter she’d been letting him nap on into a smallish square that was thick and fluffy. Xerxes wasted no time flopping onto the thick comforter and waiting for his little. Mr Mike held him out parallel to the ground and made a big show of making a mechanical whirring sound as he lowered him like he was a person shaped crane. Despite the flurry of activity, John couldn’t help having a giggle. His drawing pad was held out to him, and the dark gray 3D pencil that he had taken to using was handed to him. The entire box was placed off to his left so that he could use any of the others that he wanted. “Xerxes: Guard” Mommy said as she came back outside to put a sippy cup full of cold water next to him. He went from crouched on the chair covering his ears to outside reclined on his furry buddy in less than two minutes. He spent a moment pulling some of the comforter up over his legs and then flipped through his sketch pad waiting for an idea of what to draw. Looking at his previous drawing of the yard and garden, he thought about the conversation he had listened to about them expanding the yard and adding a green house. It took some squinting to get a mental image of what he wanted, and he knew that he didn’t get to erase any mistakes so he wanted to make it count. Taking a moment to make a tiny doodle of what he imagined in the top right corner so that it wouldn’t be in the way of his left hand as he drew, he drew the porch taking up half the bottom, and the house taking the other half. He then did a quick mock up of the stone path going to the gate, and made a square at the back, then a few lines that he guessed were about the number of rows of plants. With his idea roughly in mind, he grabbed another pencil to use as a straight edge and started drawing from his perspective on the porch, but this time he made the fence go roughly twice as far away, and pressed VERY hard as he drew the back fence. That done, he doodled a rough green house based on the few times he’d ever seen a glass building. It wasn’t great, but it had a roof with one single edge that was taller on one side. Sure, a green house would probably have a two sides ot he roof, but this was his doodle and he could do what he wanted. Kind of grinning to himself snuck in a little rough drawing of Argo sitting up on the top of the greenhouse. It wasn’t a flattering little drawing, but Argo wasn’t a flattering stuffy so it seemed even more fitting. As he started to fill in things like a stone pathway going right down the middle of the yard to the greenhouse he saw that he messed up a spot and flopped dramatically back onto Xerxes. As the dog smelled the top of his head he said “I goofed buddy. I don’t want to start over, this was a half hour of work.” After a moment the dog rested his muzzle on top of John, making him flail a bit as he got gently squished. By the time he wormed his way out from under the dogs head, he had an idea. So with a quick hug around the dogs neck and a kiss on the side of the big furry face he said “Thanks for the idea buddy. Even if you didn’t mean it.” Reaching for a blue pencil he carefully drew a bucket over the stone that he’d messed up and made look oddly like a melting gummi bear sith lord. There, no one will know that he goofed. Having fixed that inspired him, so he drew a tiny little house in the far back of this imaginary yard. Sure, the bigs would just see it as a playhouse, but to him it would look like a little cabin. He even managed to press just about right in the grooves of the boards so that they didn’t look like they were floating comically. Sure, he wasn’t strong enough to make super cool 3D things that popped off the page like a big, but he felt pretty accomplished with what he could do. After he was done with the yard, the walkway, the greenhouse, and the little cabin, he stared up at the plants and decided to put the tomatoes far off to the left along the fence to that they weren’t in the way of the cabin. The short green leafy stuff were next and he was sketching the low wire fence around the pepper plants when he heard tires on gravel coming closer to the house. Moments later there was the sound of the gate latch moving and Xerxes leapt up to stand in front of John. Pretty confused now, he stood up and tried to peak around the dog. First he saw the blue jeans. Then he saw the loaded belt. And by the time he saw the shirt, he knew who it was. But that didn’t stop Xerxes from running to stand at the top of the stairs between the large man and the little he was guarding. Tail straight back, ears locked forward and teeth bare. Xerxes was a silent sentinel. But still, it was time to intervene. “Mom!!! Agent Praefectus is here, and Xerxes is about to eat him!” Within five seconds, Mom was out the door and commanding “Xerxes: DOWN.” And even then, the dog wouldn’t just sit down, he went back over to sit between them and John. And smelled his little just to make sure he was okay. He couldn’t help laughing as the cold nose smelled his face. The view from his side of the porch was of a dog and the topmost parts of two bigs. Mom was polite as always “Agent Praefectus, welcome back! What can we do for you today?” Agent Praefectus came into Johns field of view with a smile “Well Ma’am, the people in the office gave me a more exact list of coordinates to add some more motion trackers, and they said that if we are going to use your driveway every time that they pick up a little, we should ask for a signed statement that you are okay with it.” Amanda nodded “I can sign a piece of paper stating that you can use my driveway to go rescue littles.” With a nod, Agent Praefectus pulled a folder out from under his arm and held it out while continuing “They would also like your permission to install a simple stone pathway along the perimeter of the field. Not concrete or anything damaging, just something in case some paramedics need to be able to get a bit closer.” John watched the bigs head into the house to talk about … Honestly, now that his head seemed clearer and he could think a little better, it seemed apparent that they thought about these conversations as ‘grown up’ or ‘big talk’ and he was just sort of like a kid to them. He just decided to go back to his drawing. Content enough with the rows he had made, he set about using a sky blue to color the sky. When he was done with the sky, me moved onto the fence, and got kind of a laugh out of the little cabin standing out in front of the fence as he colored it in. After coloring the stone walkway, curiosity started to get the better of him, so he stood up and carried his box of pencils and his sketch pad into the house. Finding the three bigs in the kitchen standing around the counter, he put his tablet and pencils up onto the chair he had been standing on, then scrambled up onto the chair himself, then moved his drawing pad up onto the counter and leaned onto it himself. With a quick survey of what was going on, he noticed that they were all three discussing something intently, and didn’t even notice him. Dozens of jars of salsa were on the counter, and even more jars of red sauce were waiting on the counter behind the bigs. Apparently they had finished up. Finally tuning in to what they were saying, Agent Preafectus was saying “But we are working on a way to get to them before they can wander into the woods and get eaten. Or into the river.” Mom spoke up next “Well, if you call me if there’s any motion, I can rush up there.” Agent Praefectus shook his head “We obviously want to get there as fast as possible, but so much can happen in that amount of time.” The conversation went back and forth for a while. For his part, John listened passively while he went back to coloring his sketch. An idea occurred to him and he spoke up “Hey …” They didn’t seem to hear him. “Excuse me.” They still didn’t hear him. So he tried to wave his hand. Nothing. He felt like a child trying to get the attention of adults. Finally raising his voice he said as loudly as he could without shouting outright “EXCUSE ME.” All three of them turned to look at him at the same instant and he couldn’t stop himself from shying back a bit. He felt like he suddenly drew the attention of three giant predatory animals. Mom said gently “John, the grown ups are trying to decide something important. Do you need something?” That made John stand up to his full (very short) height on his chair “But I think I can help.” It seemed like all three of them were listening to a child say that they could do calculus or something. None of them were mean or rude about it, but they clearly didn’t think he had much to contribute. Fine. He’ll act like he’s giving a presentation. “Okay” He started “I think that we can agree that I’m the one here that came through a rift and knows what it was like to come through all disoriented and throwing up?” They all just nodded. Rolling his eyes, he slid the drawing across the counter and said “Wouldn’t it be possible to put a little shack like this one I drew with a light on it and some water and blankets so that any of us that came through had a place to rest and wait for rescue?” Finally all three of them gathered around the picture and looked first at the overall drawing, but then at the little shack. “You could put like a button that says “Press this if you are lost” and then anyone that comes through would know to wait for help.” Mom nodded along and then looked him in the eyes and said “John, that’s very clever.” Agent Praefectus looked at the picture and laughed a little. “From the mouths of littles”

This was recommended to me by a friend in Second Life and I binged it on breaks here and there at work and such. And OH WOW did reading this mess me up. You did great with it, but this has killed my headspace. (... with a kn... no, it's too dark. I never do dark jokes, this messed me up) Excellent work, I will be reading more of your stories. But maybe after a bit of time so that I can get more of my stories written in a cheerful and not at all dark way.

Oh no! I really liked Nancy! Bad Nancy!

I'm sorry that you've had a bad day! If it helps at all, knowing that I was able to bring you a smile has also turned my rough day around. As a bonus, I wasn't bitten! And don't worry, dinner will be mentioned. (If a wolf gets bitten by a human, does it turn into a were human? ... would it just stress about bills and eat cheetoes during the full moon?)

The best part is that BabyGamerBoy helped me name Argo! And by helped, I mean did the naming part after I copy/pasted that part from my notes back in ... geeze, it was January. I don't even know if I plan ahead well or not, I just try to keep this moving in the direction from plot point to plot point.

By the way, I'm starting to read some of your stories, thanks for writing and sharing them!

Chapter Thirty Eight Rubbing his eyes as he woke up again, this time he was on the folded up comforter on the floor propped up against Xerxes. Still a good way to wake up. Not as great as earlier. But still two of his top three since coming here, and both in one morning. Patting Xerxes for a bit, John stretched again and rolled over to stand up. When he was able to stand up at all, he realized that was in a rough pup and not the overnight diaper he couldn’t stand up in. And somewhere along the way he had been dressed in a onesie and some shorts. Looking groggily around the house, he noticed that the door to the back porch was open, but the child gate was closed. Mom was nowhere to be found inside. So he toddled over to the child gate to peek out onto the porch. He spotted her on the chair nearest the door. “Mom?” he asked as sweetly as he could managed. He probably succeeded better because he was half awake. With the tell tale clink of a cup of coffee being put down he could watch her stand up and turn around with a smile. “There’s my little sleepy head! Would you like to join me for some coffee milk?” There it was, she was fully awake in the morning. He simply nodded, and Mom immediately reached down over the gate and got him around the ribs and hoisted him up onto her hip before opening the gate and walking over to the fridge to pull out a bottle of coffee milk that she’d already had ready. Within moments they were back outside and she was back in the chair and shuffled him around so that he was sideways on her and leaning back semi comfortably on the arm of the chair and her left upper arm. Complaining about not getting to sit in a chair on his own would have to wait, addiction to Mommy’s milk and coffee was more urgent as the bottle was turned up. Five minutes later he was sitting on her lap feeling a bit giggly. The milk was starting to hit him a bit harder lately for some reason. As he finished the milk, he noticed Mommy was looking at him a big different, which made him giggle some more. And when she tilted him over her shoulder and patted him firmly on the back he asked “Hey *pat* what *pat* are *pat* yo…” and then he involuntarily issued out a long burp that left him giggling even harder still. Smiling down at him, Mommy asked “Hey, do you want to help me pick and wipe off a few more tomatoes, or would you like to go play or read?” For the first time he didn’t just answer that he wanted to go help, he had to think about it for a moment in his current mental state. He still said “Yes please.” “John … yes to what?” He answered “Oh! To helping.” and he started worming his way off of her lap. She didn’t immediately let him down, but she after a moment she put the coffee cup and bottle down, got him under the arms and turned him right side up before depositing him on the porch. The instant his feet hit the porch he made to bolt into the yard, but he was foiled as mommy grabbed the back of his shorts and pulled him backwards. “And where do you think you’re going, young man?” He turned to look up somewhat indignantly and explained “Yard.” “Shoes.” was all she said. “Don’t need em.” “Shoes.” “… Yes Ma’am.” With a nod, she stood up and went inside, carrying the bottle and the cup with her. Left alone he scooted closer to the edge of the porch. Every fiber of him screaming to jump off the porch and run into the yard. Oh it was so tempting. It was maybe his entire height from him to the ground. He could roll as he landed. It would be like in a movie. As he started to instinctively lean toward the edge, Mommy came outside with a pair of socks and pointed below him. “Park your booty.” With a sigh at the lost opportunity to dive and roll, he sat down on the edge of the porch. He couldn’t stop from swinging his feet while he waited for her and then she had to grab one of his feet to put a sock and shoe onto it before pinning the other one. She looked at her watch and said “Okay, you’ve got about twenty minutes to pick tomatoes. The little scissors and a towel are in your wagon.” He looked a bit confused as he asked “What happens in twenty minutes” She just stood him up and gave him a couple of pats on the bottom as she dodged the question “You’ll see. Just go be happy in the meantime.” He just shrugged and set off with his wagon. Oddly, instead of joining him, she stayed by the porch. When he turned to look back she was sitting on the porch with a towel wiping off vegetables and seemed to just be preparing for something. And she was conveniently seated where she had a perfect view of where he was going to be the entire time. Whatever, Mommy was being weird. So he started looking through the vines to see if any tomatoes that weren’t ready yesterday were ready today. And much to his surprise there were a couple of dozen that felt about right. One of them was shaped super wide like a UFO. So that set him back to giggling and making sound effects as it went into the wagon. After just enough time for him to make a quick inspection of the entire row his insides went from nothing to panic, like flipping a switch. He was so alarmed as the urge hit him like a freight train that he turned to look at Mommy and she was there looking at her watch and then looked up at him. John wanted to run. To plead to make it to the potty. He wanted … anything other than… There wasn’t even enough time to want anything else, his arms went around his belly and he doubled over. There was no stopping it, and it was completely demoralizing. Within seconds of the urge hitting him he was panting as warm liquid mush filled the back of his diaper, spreading out to fill every nook and cranny available, and then somehow finding or making more space. Holding the side of the wagon, he steadied himself as a little more somehow came out of him. The sound of footsteps in the grass coming toward him was faint in what little attention he had to spare, but he looked up to see Mommy smiling down at him. She held out her hand and asked “Would you like to walk, or do you want me to carry you?” The answer was obvious “Please carry me, Mommy.” She just nodded as she reached down and lifted him up, sliding her arm under him and lowering him onto her left forearm. He grimaced as all of his weight landed on that arm butt first. His shoes were pulled off and deposited on the porch as they got to the steps, and he felt her pause to step out of her shoes at the top of the steps before carrying him in. He barely registered the child gate swinging shut in his peripheral vision as they went through the living room to his bedroom. And so for the first time that he was awake for today, he was on the changing table with his shorts being pulled off and the weird puzzle snaps on his onesie being undone. Before she laid him down she held out her arms in the silent offer of a hug. He reached out in return and was immediately wrapped up in a warm, comforting, hug. She gave him a big kiss on the forehead before laying him down and getting to work. “I don’t understand” was all he could really vocalize. “What don’t you understand, sweety?” “Why did … it was just …” He was breathing fast again, it was freaking him out a little. “Twenty four minutes after you finished the coffee milk, you went off. I timed it last time, and this time you made it the exact same, down to the minute. Although…” She looked at what she was cleaning up “This time you may have gone for a record.” “So this really was the coffee milk?” She just nodded while she scrubbed him diligently. “Yes.” “I don’t want to have to give up coffee.” She stopped wiping and rolled up the used diaper to deposit into the waste bin in the changing table. “Lift.” As he raised booty, she slid a clean diaper underneath him and patted him on the hip and said “Down.” He flopped back down and as she set back about powdering him and taping him back up she explained “You don’t have to give up coffee. And every so often most littles get constipated from time to time and need an enema or a suppository. So at least it doesn’t look like you’ll be having that problem!” He shuddered as she said two of those words and she re-snapped his onesie before standing him back up. Instead of putting him down she picked him up in a big hug and held him to her chest with her cheek pressed against his. She whispered “It’s okay. I love you.” Hearing those words gave him butterflies in his stomach. (Thankfully just butterflies this time!) Carrying him to the living room, still minus the shorts, she stood him up on the couch and ruffled his hair before asking “Okay, what would you like to do for a couple of hours?” Without hesitation this time, he answered “May I play on my tablet?” Not only did Mommy say “Absolutely!” but she handed it to him and went to fix him a sippy cup of water. A few minutes later, John found himself leaning back against Xerxes, a blanket over him and the dog keeping him nice and warm. Staring at the tablet he was having a little bit of trouble focusing, but he found a neat little puzzle game that involved spinning discs to make a ball have a path to get out from the middle of the puzzle to the outside of the puzzle. It was sort of like a round labyrinth puzzle, but every layer had to be turned. It was simple and neat. And for some reason, every time the ball rolled along he had another little giggle fit. Without realizing it, his giggle fits were starting to subside as he wound down from his milk high. And he started to focus more on the puzzles and make more progress as he went. With all of the windows open, it was easy to hear a truck coming down the driveway. As if prepared, Mom came in and turned on the coffee maker. John thought about hopping up immediately but wanted to at least finish this last puzzle first. About the same time that he finished his puzzle, there were footsteps on the porch. So getting up, Xerxes stood up behind him and did a full body shake while he put the tablet back on the coffee table where Mom kept it. John walked over to the door as Mom showed Mr Mike into the house. The man had to duck a little to step through a thirteen foot tall door frame. Mr Mike smiled as he greeted Mom and held out a large (to John) container, cleaned and ready to return. On top of the container was a little cardboard box. “What’s this?” she asked him. With a coy smile he said “Well. I guess you’ll have to open it so that we can find out!” Immediately Mom sat the container on the counter and opened the box to find what looked to John to be a large handmade mug. To everyone else around here it was just a normal sized mug. The cool thing about the mug was that there was a stream painted all the way around it, and the handle was somehow shaped like a tree limb and painted accordingly. Mom immediately stepped up to give him a big hug and a thank you. “Mike! This is gorgeous!” With a great big smile he nodded “Well, I’m glad that you like it! I know someone that teaches pottery and I called in a favor.” Practically bouncing with excitement she held it from a couple of different angles now and complimented “Usually cups half this pretty are uncomfortable to hold. This is very good work!” Mike held up a hand and said “One more thing. John, could you turn around for just a moment?” With a nonchalant shrug, John turned around to look at Xerxes, who was standing behind him with a big happy dog grin on his face as his tail whipped back and forth. John felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see a grinning giant man with one arm behind his back. Chuckling, Mike explained "You know John, your Mom's not the only on that gets a present. I searched the entire store and this was the only thing I could find that seemed appropriate for you." And without further ado, his left arm came around and John was presented with ... a stuffie. But this wasn't any stuffie. This stuffie looked like it was meant to be some sort of a lizard, a lizard that was then over filled to make it seem more welcoming. It looked ridiculous. It looked like someone started with a poorly drawn Godzilla that they then colored like an iguana. It was the size of his entire torso, and had legs that bent awkwardly in much the same way that a Vienna Sausage doesn't. Reaching out silently, seemingly mesmerized by the unfathomably awkward appearance of this large stuffie, he grabbed it and squeezed it. It felt like a giant mutated marshmallow. And all of it was somehow eclipsed by the eyes. Those outlandish eyes. The two glassy eyes staring back at him were a small landscape of jade and caramel colored swirls that had a small black disc in them. The most elaborate googly eyes in either dimension were on this ... John was at a loss for words. He found himself so lost in his search for words that he started with a little laugh. Then the laugh started to grow more and more until he could hardly breath for the laughter. John, and his entire history of being able to react on the fly and make up anything on a whim were defeated by this stuffie. The single squishy embodiment of the word "Derp." Standing there laughing so hard he was crying for easily two solid minutes, it took a while to regain any semblance of composure. The giggles he’d had since the milk this morning were more than back. It took longer than he realized that the two bigs were kneeling down next to him and that Mommy had a hand behind him trying to hold him up while he had a full on laugh attack. Eventually catching his breath he wiped at his eyes. “Hahaha… oh my … Mister M… Hahaha Mist… Mister Mike he … hahhh I’m okay … I can breathe …” The two bigs both seemed almost as amused by his reaction as he did by the … derp…. Derpasaur … Interrupting his train of though, Mommy asked “Do you like him?” Exclaiming “Are you kidding!? Look at him! He’s glorious! And Derpy. Derp…. Us … no …” It was impossible to notice that the two bigs over him nodded at each other as he mulled over names. Mumbling to himself, John tried “Derp … derpus? M… no … Godzi… no … Derpzi… no, too eas… Argo!...Hahahaha. Oh, Oh, this is great!” Mr Mike ruffled his hair and asked “Did you name him already?” “Yup!” John exclaimed proudly. “What did you name him?” Mommy asked from behind him. “Argo McDerpus!” “…”

You are absolutely right! I'll start sewing up Steve the Squirrel a little messenger bag and a little mail cap!

Oh my heart! So do we just say it in here "Hey, I would love to read this one" or like DM you? Do I write it on a balloon in sharpie and mail the balloon to you with a note that says "inflate me to find out"? How does this work, and can it involve wildlife somehow?

I know it's mostly the fuzzy brain but ... That's a truism if ever one was typed!

I mean, we've already got proof that Xerxes is possessive of his little. But he also knows Victor and is doggy friends with him, so Victor has that going for him.

He'd be quite the salesman, just by virtue of being a little riding a dog around and inviting people to the stall!

Fun side note: we had a bad storm and the power went out. So instead of posting something messily edited and poorly done I had to cut a few paragraphs while my laptop battery and phone Hotspot lasted. On the upside, this turned out to be a pretty good point to pivot between plot points. Power will be back on and I'll get back to fixing my writing nonsense!

Chapter Thirty Seven Amanda woke at 5:30, reaching out to smack her alarm the moment it went off. It hadn’t woken up her son at any point before, but somehow it being extra early made it seem even worse if he was woken up by it. Getting out of bed and getting dressed was a quiet and slow affair. Considering herself a morning person was one thing. Getting up early enough to meet Mr Frank was another thing entirely. In fact, she was convinced that he was one of those old men that wakes up at 4am somehow magically having a coffee cup in his hand and talking, at length, about the weather. He then took a nap shortly after noon, and then woke up with coffee in his hands and staring at every meteorological chart he could find. Mr Frank was a retired weatherman, and apparently his sleep schedule reflected that. So with a deep sigh, she shuffled to the coffee maker and got a pot going, making sure to fill it all the way so that she could top off his thermos when he came by. Stopping to splash a bit of cold water from the sink in her face, she got a big glass of ice water to sip on while she waited for the coffee. Of course Xerxes knows the routine and was already waiting by the door to be let out. Fixing a cup of coffee, she barely had the back door open before Xerxes was out of it, whining. Pausing only to turn the porch light on, Amanda stepped into her garden boots and walked over to the gate facing the driveway. As she got closer, a whining Xerxes was standing there trotting in place doing his own version of the potty dance. Opening the gate for him, she instructed “Go find your perfect potty spot.” And he was gone into the field between the driveway and the woods, smelling around and looking for the exact spot he wanted to relieve himself this morning. Silly dog. Amanda took a moment to stretch a bit and mentally wake up enough to finish harvesting the last of what she needed to have ready in a couple of hours. She got a bucket and a foam kneeling board and got to it. It seemed a bit more boring without her gardening little to entertain her, and Xerxes laid down in the walkway to watch her. But she got the rest of it done in time just like always. By 7am all of the buckets were lined up by the fence, and the milk crates of jars were on the porch. When she heard the sound of tires on gravel, she walked to the gate to see a well kept older truck coming down the driveway. Behind the wheel there was an older gentleman with salt and pepper hair, and in the passenger seat there was a large Brown Shepard dog with its head out the window. As the truck pulled up close to the fence, she watched him lean and open the passenger and could head “Go on” before watching Victor jump out of the truck and run over. She got to pet the large dog for about five seconds before Xerxes ran up to him. As dogs do, they spent a moment smelling each other, and then ran off into the field to sprint back and forth, occasionally barking at Steve the squirrel. Every so often they would see a bird to go bark at. As the two dogs ran off, Mr Frank walked up and held out his hand. “Good morning Miss Taylor.” “Mister Tempes, we have been doing this for two and a half years. And every time I tell you to call me Amanda.” He laughed “And every time I tell you that I will call you by your last name when I greet you.” They shared a chuckle for a moment before he spoke first. “Amanda, you look pretty happy this morning. What’s going on these days?” Now she couldn’t help but smile “Well Frank, last week I found a little and it’s been a pretty amazing experience.” While they loaded buckets and plastic crates into the back of the truck together, and she filled his thermos as a courtesy, Amanda recalled her experience with finding John, and everything they had been through together. By the time they were done loading everything, Mr Frank nodded “Huh. Go figure that there would be a rift up the way. I’m glad that you were there for him. Sounds like I’d like to meet him some time!” She waited patiently as Mr Frank went to the glove box of his truck and came back with an envelope. “Here’s your half from the last two weeks. You know all your tomatoes, pickles, and peppers will be gone by noon, right?” That made her smile “I’m glad that people enjoy them. That makes this a hobby that pays for itself, plus enough to pay the utilities.” With a nod Mr Frank advised her “We have about a month and a half left of prime growing season. This weather today is going to be the best we’ll see for a while though. Cold front coming through is going to stay for a week, so if you plan to open all your windows and let the breeze through, do it today.” Laughing now, Amanda admitted “I guess I’ll need to make sure John is wearing long pants and a shirt when he goes outside next week. Getting him to wear shoes is harder than I want to admit, though. Speaking of, it’s almost time to wake him up.” Holding out his hand to shake her own, Mr Frank said “I have to go get the stall set up anyway.” Taking his hand with a laugh, she admitted “There’s no way I’d go back to doing all of that and selling to so many people.” As he corralled Victor back into the truck he mentioned “But you know that’s how we met and made out arrangement, so it worked out well in the end. As Mr Frank was getting back into his truck, she looked through the window and mentioned “Oh, and my son loves animals, so you have to bring Victor back some time. The thought of him seeing a dog bigger than Xerxes is pretty amusing.” As she watched Me Frank head back down the driveway, she stopped to think out loud “I should ask him for advice about adding a green house when I expand the fence. With that, she turned and closed the gate behind her on the way into the house. Stopping in the doorway to her sons room to yawn, she caught sight of him through the mesh wall. Bottom up on the pillow like usual. It was always adorable to see. Not bothering to lower the side this morning, she reached up and popped the middle open, Pausing to check his diaper, the found it to be well used. So without waking him up she shuffled him gently over to the changing table. He just laid there completely limp as she set about changing his diaper. She had to be a quick when his little friend started to stir in his sleep, but she had him in a clean diaper in a minute and back up onto her shoulder. Whispering, she asked “Hey baby, you awake?” The response she got back was just him groaning and somehow she could almost make out the word ‘sleep’ “You know what. I agree.” So with that she went to the living room, paused to open one of the windows with her free hand, and made her way to the couch. Laying back down on the couch and getting the blanket over the two of them with one hand was interesting to say the least. As last she was laying down on the couch with her sleeping little on her chest and belly with a blanket over the two of them. She laid there idly stroking his hair as he slipped back off to dream land. Closing her eyes for a quick nap, she decided that just this once him getting a little extra sleep time in the morning was a nice trade off for extra cuddles. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ John woke up and stretched his arms and legs out in all directions before flopping back onto his pillow. His pillow was particularly warm this morning. And soft. Moving his head side to side, he opened his eyes to realize what he was using as a pillow. Realizing what it was didn’t stop him from flopping his head back onto the breast. But it did make it feel a bit awkward to doze back off. Hearing her heart beat against his right ear helped a lot as he drifted back off for a bit, barely registering that with a large arm over him he couldn’t have slid off or wormed his way out of her snuggle even if he had wanted to. But he did fall asleep to a dream about drinking milk in bed. Which was a bit weird, even for him.

I feel like Kathy is getting exactly what she wanted in the end. She's getting adopted and shoved just a little bit further down into the system, and that much less likely to ever get her passport.

Well now I have to go watch Spy X Family

You know, that's not really the premise of my story, per se ... and it's not an idea you would expect me to take away from this ... But now I'm wondering if I could sneak in a little bow tie for Xerxes.

Oh, and total honesty. I'm not convinced that Xerxes isn't the main character.

Okay wow! I can't thank you enough for taking the time to respond, let alone so thoroughly! I'm beyond delighted to hear that you're enjoying the story so far! You've probably at least scrolled past some of my comments describing the premise of things here. I agree completely, morning people are scary. I say this while typing with one eye open and a cup of hot tea to help with the inhumane process of having to wake up. Again, thank you kindly!

I confess that I've been waiting for the next chapter, but working diligently. I wouldn't dare be lazy trying to get to one little part that I've been excited for. Thank you VERY much! I'm trying to do my best at all of this. Honestly this is my first time writing anything even remotely like this. I know that I have in my head and I've openly stated that the premise is to show a growing relationship from both points of view, and trying to express how they each see the world through a different lense of experience. I feel like we have plenty of stories from our own point if view, and from our perspective the Amazon's are borderline evil. But from their perspective it's just business as usual. Most of them probably fully believe that they are doing what's best for us. (Even if we don't want it because silly Littles just don't know what's best for them)

I'm going to be completely honest. The training pacifier would become my own personal nightmare if the bigs figured out my tendency to be, putting it mildly, "Sarcastic under stress." They'd have me in the corner so much they'd have to saw two sides off a playpen so I could sleep there. And no spoilers, but there may be some different diapers in the future. But for now: Mike episodes and something I have had scripted since before my surgeries put me out of commission it's dumb and whimsical and just a tiny tiny part, but I'm a till excited Thank you so very kindly! It's hard sometimes to feel like we should be allowed to be happy. As odd as that sounds sometimes, sometimes we have conflicting emotions.

Chapter Thirty Six John rolled back off of the giant pillow, not even flinching as his very wet diaper hit the bed. He grumbled as he rolled around a bit. He even resorted to grabbing the pillow and just pulling on it mindlessly. Being half buried under the pillow just made him even grumpier. Finally he just growled out loud as he shoved the pillow off of him, got onto all fours and flopped back onto the pillow. Without even bothering to call out to his supposed Mommy, he idly swung his foot back and forth, barely kicking at the gate. After less than a minute he got bored with that and turned sideways so that he was draped over the pillow with his butt up in the air and his upper body and legs hanging off the sides. Looking through the mesh he saw the dog sit up and look over at him. “Xerxes, go get me a file, a nuclear reactor, and coil of wire.” When the dog, predictably, did not react, he reached out and put his palm against the mesh and halfway smiled as his hand was smelled. This time when he grumbled and rolled around, he flopped off of the pillow and laid in front of the mesh, looking at Xerxes. With nothing else to do, he talked to the dog. “You know Xerxes, by all rights if I were still at home I’d be working sixty hours a week and worried about bills. Here I don’t have to work and I get to draw and spend time outside and Mom is great. But I can’t just like … get in my truck and go buy popcorn in the middle of the night.” Laying there for a moment in silence, he watched the dog still looking back at him, tail moving, just happy to be talked to. “I suppose that you don’t know what it’s like to be conflicted.” With a pat on the mesh he rolled around restlessly, got back onto all fours and flopped back onto the pillow, this time facing Xerxes from his perch. Musing to himself “I wonder if I just miss the idea of the freedom. I don’t think I could even be happy there anymore. Maybe I’m grumpy because I’m happy.” After a moment he added to himself “Maybe I’m grumpy because I’m just grumpy.” He picked up his head and headbutted the pillow a few times, still grumbling. “Let’s face it, I have more time to do fun things, and instead of working six days a week I get to be here with Mom… Aman… Mom.” He spent a couple more minutes laying there practicing his grumpy faces. He saw his pacy laying there. Not clipped to his shirt with that stupid clip that he couldn’t undo. Just laying right there. He thought about the implication of ‘his’ pacy. Impulsively he picked it up and threw it hard against the mesh wall of the crib. It just bounced off uselessly, but it felt good to throw something. He picked up Rupert and thought about it, but couldn’t bring himself to throw the stuffy. It wasn’t Ruperts fault that he was grumpy. Finally he just snapped and grabbed the pacy and threw it hard while yelling just a loud “UUGGG.” The concept of controlling his emotions didn’t exist at the moment. After a short wait he heard Amanda coming through the doorway and over to the wall of the crib. Stupid crib wall. She reached up and lowered the side wall down and leaned on it. He spared a glance, and she looked concerned. Stupid concern. Hearing her ask softly “Hey Sweety, are you okay?” just made him take a deep breath and exhale as long as he could until he felt his lungs blissfully empty. It took a moment to decide how to answer that. He wanted to be mad. He wanted to lash out. None of this was her fault, and he knew it. But even still he rolled away from her and onto his back looking up at the ceiling. With a deep sigh he admitted. “No.” She was quiet for a moment. He didn’t know if it was because she was giving him time to talk if he wanted to, or if she was just trying to figure out what to say. After a moment he saw a hand come over and felt her stroking his hair. He tensed up, but relaxed as she stroked his hair softly. It was barely a whisper that he heard from behind him “You can talk to me about anything that you want to.” Picking up his left arm and waving a bit dismissively, he explained “I don’t know what it is anyway.” “Do you want some snuggles?” He thought about it for a moment. He liked snuggles. And he wanted them. But he also just … was still mad at something, or anything. Or nothing. “… no.” “Well, you can change your mind at any time. Do you want to go draw, or go outside?” After a moment to breathe, and stall to think, he admitted “I don’t know.” Her voice was soft as velvet as she whispered “It’s okay if you don’t know what you want to do. None of us have to know what we want all the time.” With a huff he responded “I don’t know what I want. I should at least know that.” “Sweety.” Amanda said while patting him oh so gently on the side. “Look at me for a moment.” Giving in and rolling onto his back, he looked over at her. Once he was looking at her, she continued “It sounds like you’re struggling with some big feelings. And those probably need to process. I won’t push you, but if you can find the words to express those big feelings, I would love nothing more than to hear them and help you with them.” A weak laugh was all he could muster. “Am I even allowed to have big feelings? Are littles supposed to get those here?” “Ah.” was all Amanda said for a moment. “So does that mean that littles don’t get that right?” He felt bad for pushing, but he was grumpy and otherwise if he had the thought he would have just bottled it up until it festered in him. “John.” Amanda started carefully “I won’t lie to you that sometimes littles in this world don’t get that choice. You still do. I want you to be as complex and thoughtful and sweet and mischievous as can be. If you’re sad, I want you to tell me. If you’re happy, I want you to tell me. And if there’s something eating at you, I definitely want you to tell me.” “Ugh.” was all he said at first. But of course she stood there waiting patiently, her hand gently on his head, stroking his hair. “Is that snuggle still available?” Now smiling she explained “For you, the very best snuggles.” With a nod he held up his arms. He didn’t even bother to sit up. She just picked him up and carried him, wet diaper and all, into the living room and sat with him on the rocking chair. She even pulled the throw blanket up over him and got him snuggled in nice and warm, with one large hand patting him on the back. She didn’t speak. She just held him. She was obviously waiting for him. For his part he just laid there with his head on her chest, lost in thought. After a while he finally broke the silence. “I don’t get it.” The hand on his back stopped moving as she answered “What don’t you get.” He answered candidly “I don’t get what I don’t get. I miss my world. I know that rationally I am honestly healthier here, I’m not working myself to death. But I miss it.” After she took a moment to think carefully of her response, she asked “Well, what do you miss most about it?” “I don’t … I think …” He struggled to understand himself and how to say it in words. “… maybe the freedom? But I guess I wasn’t really all THAT free, I spent all of me week at work. I came home tired, I barely paid my bills. So it’s not like I had some glamorous life. I just … had … is autonomy the word?” He could see her nod as she answered “That may well be the word you are looking for. Self determination, perhaps?” Having looked up at her, he flopped his head back against her chest. “I have time to read and draw, and I get to help you in the garden. Helping you do things is my favorite thing in this world. Even if I had the choice to go back home … I don’t know if I could. Or would? I don’t understand. I think I feel like I shouldn’t be happy?” The rocking chair stopped moving for a moment and she scooted him up closer and kissed him on the forehead. “Well, I obviously WANT you to be happy. I know that we can’t get you home, and for record you helping is wonderful and I love you all the more for wanting to participate. But I can’t force you to be happy. Well, not in any ethical way.” He looked up at her for a moment, but let that pass. She was probably just referring to some odd way the bigs do things in this world. With his head still on her chest he admitted “Don’t worry. I’m happy with you. You’re an amazing Mommy. I didn’t choose to need one, but I’m glad it was you.” That got him another kiss on the forehead. But otherwise she seemed content to wait for him to talk more. “I think I feel better.” A simple, non committal conclusion that … felt like a lie. “… Okay, I feel less bad. I’m sorry.” He could feel her tilt forward as she stood up and pulled the blanket off as she carried him back towards his room. As she laid him on the changing table and got to work she asked him “Okay so what would you like to do? Gardening, drawing, or befriending more animals to make my life complicated? Lift.” He went along with the diaper change, doing his own little part here an there as he answered. “I would like to help in the garden, please.” He answered honestly. For some reason after the talk he had it seemed easier to be direct with her. With a nod and the word “Down.” she continued “Well, you can pick out what you want to wear, and then whatever we have that you want for dinner, I’ll fix it for you.” He thought in silence until she bumped the table and stood him up. While she looked at him, he answered. “Shortalls. Peas. Chicken strips.” “T shirt or onesie?” “Shirt.” With a nod she pulled open a drawer on his dresser and let him get out what he wanted to wear, and then helped him with the straps and clips on the shortalls. Then she lightly bopped him with a pair of socks over and over again until he got the message and put them on. Mommy picked up the doggy bed and simply walked out of the room, leaving him follow or not as he wanted. Small gestures sometimes feel big. With a pause in the kitchen to hand him a sippy cup of water and get a bottle to bring herself, they were out on the porch. His shoes were placed next to his old boots, which made him feel like he was being given the choice. Honestly the boots were a bit too loose from him shrinking so much, so he slipped his feet into the shoes and waited patiently for them to be tied for him, since the weird laces from this dimension always fly apart for him. “Okay!” Mommy said with a single clap of her hands “Tomorrow morning a good friend of mine, Mr Frank, will be here at sunrise to pick up a lot of produce, pickles, and pickled peppers. So all of this has to be harvested today. Except the Arugula, that happens tomorrow right before he gets here so that it’s fresh.” John just nodded along “So how do I help?” “Well, you and your little wagon can be a huge help if you want to just do the peas and the tomatoes. Two buckets of tomatoes will go with Mr Frank, and before lunch Mr Mike is coming back and the rest of them are going to be turned into salsa. I bought the rest of the ingredients I need for that at the store today.” John nodded and stood up, holding his arms out he said “Catch?” He was rewarded with her holding out her arms so he jumped, she caught him, hugged him before she set him down. John go this wagon and went straight for the peas. Only this time instead of Mommy heading to the other side of the garden, she got a couple of buckets and she got started doing the tops of the plants. From his perspective, she didn’t seem like she normally did. She was on a mission. She was in her zone. But John had an advantage. John had a wagon, and he didn’t have to go back and forth or move a bucket. So he pulled it along beside him, and much to his pride, he made it to the end of the first row before she did. He lost his lead when he had to wait for her to simply pick his wagon up and empty it out into a large bucket. Then he lost some more time as she fussed at him for not drinking any water yet. And so they finished the second row together. It felt REALLY good to be doing something meaningful. As they started on the tomato plants, Mommy surprised him. Instead of the safety scissors, she held out a different pair. “These look to be actually sharp.” He said out loud as she held out a pair of scissors that seems small in her hand. “These are tiny sewing shears. I noticed the other ones gave you trouble. You will of course be careful with these.” It was not a question. And so, feeling on top of the world, he drank some water just so that she couldn’t fuss at him, and then got to work on the tomatoes. The problem was the tomatoes took him a long time. All of his tomatoes he put in the wagon wiped off and clean and pretty. But he was being left in the dust. It didn’t matter, he was contributing and didn’t know how to help with the other stuff yet anyway. So he took his time and got two rows of tomatoes from just above his head height and down. By the time he was done, the sun was getting a bit lower, and he sat on the steps and watched Mommy working on the other side of the yard in her little section of hellish death peppers, collecting entire buckets of tiny, brightly colored little murder fruit. With nothing to do otherwise, he spotted a gray form on the fence and somehow Xerxes had gone to watch Mommy. This was his time. He grabbed two acorns and made a line for the fence, dragging a bucket with him. He quickly overturned the bucket and held up one acorn. The reward was having his hand smelled with a tiny, cold, nose briefly before one acorn was taken, then he held up the other and the process was repeated. After a few moments, Steve darted away. Worth it. Once he was done dragging the bucket back, John climbed the too tall stairs up onto the porch to look out over the yard. Impulsively he grabbed the new toy for Xerxes off of the table between the two chairs, pretending that he didn’t have to stand on tip toes to grab it. New toy in hand, he made his way back down the steps, and turned right to go to where Xerxes was watching their Mommy. Ah. Xerxes was watching because she was gathering peppers in the part of the yard he wasn’t allowed. Even dogs weren’t immune to curiosity, it seemed. Xerxes attention was easily attained by holding out the plastic toy with the large tennis ball at the end and letting him smell it. Once he had the dogs undivided attention he took the end of the toy with both hands and hands and swung it over and down. For a first attempt it wasn’t very graceful, and the ball just went horizontally and then bounced along the ground. But that was more than enough to send one furry missile after it. When Xerxes came back, happily presenting the tennis ball, he dropped it and hunkered down waiting for it to be sent away again. With a moment to figure out how to get the ball jammed back in, he put his foot on top of the plastic and gave it a little push to pop it back in place, and sent it off, careful to keep it away from the plants. And that was how the next hour went. Xerxes stayed out of Mommy’s way, and John stayed entertained with his furry buddy. By the time it was all said and done, there were rows of buckets lined up on the side of the porch, some of which he had filled himself. Sure, it wasn’t a full time job like he’d had before, but as John stood looking at everything that they had done it was nice to have done it. Even if Mommy … John shook his head as he thought and corrected himself, ‘Mom’ did most of the actual lifting side of things. As he stood there looking at the buckets, a hand waved in front of his face. He turned to look up at Mom apparently repeating herself “Are you there?” Feeling even more direct than usual he shrugged and said “I was lost in thought.” He watched her nod and then she knelt down and pulled his shoes off before giving him a gentle swat on the bottom and pointing him into the house. So in he went. He made it halfway to the living room before he was scooped up and carried to the bathroom where he was stripped down to his diaper, placed (with a squish) onto the bathroom counter, and scrubbed with a warm wet rag. “Hey, I’m not THAT dirty!” he tried to protest. She leaned and squinted at him. Then as she held up the white rag with traces of dirt all over it he bravely decided to concede her point by shrugging noncommittally. Once he was clean enough to pass inspection she carried him to the changing table and he participated in his usual way. Lifting. Flopping. Basically just trying to not make it harder than necessary for her. Once it was done, really only two minutes, she picked him up into a great big hug and slid him down to the floor. “Okay. You get a shirt or onesie. Or just the diaper if you want. Then I’ll get dinner going, shouldn’t take long.” Nodding, John went over to the dresser and grabbed the handle, leaned back into it to pull the drawer open, and grabbed just any shirt without looking. It was blue and had some sort of cartoon on it. With a nod, Mom took the shirt from him and pulled it into place, ruffled his hair and said “Go play or draw.” So as she walked out of the room he went over to his tablet and pressed his thumb against the corner to turn it on. There were a lot of new icons to explore, but this seemed a great time to sit and read. He didn’t want to read ahead of Kate in the Odyssey of Hugh, so he just idly scrolled the young adult section until he found a Scifi novel about a spaceship crew being lost in space. The image showed a man, a woman, and two littles all in space suits. In the background there was some sort of robot nanny with sparks like it was going haywire. Curiosity got the better of him so he clicked ‘Start Reading’ and went through the prologue at the beginning. It seemed like the book was about a group from one planet to another and they got rerouted by the autocomputer to avoid an asteroid storm, and from there things spiraled out of control. Settling in to read, he felt something cold bopping him on the shoulder relentlessly until he took the sippy cup and started drinking from it. Interrupted again later for dinner, John found himself back in his booster seat, looking at two large chicken strips that were supposedly normal sized. Each one was really just the size of a chicken breast at home. There was ketchup for the chicken strips, and he had a bowl chock full of buttery sweet peas waiting for him. Once he bit into the chicken strip, it was obvious that it was made with some sort of voodoo or something, because it was addictively good. It was an excellent dinner and he gave up halfway through the second chicken strip and made sure that Xerxes was very well spoiled. Carried to the kitchen and placed on the counter, hands washed, face wiped. He sat on the counter and impulsively held up his arms for a hug. Somehow the assurance that just making the simple gesture guaranteed he was going to be picked up and hugged lovingly made him feel a certain way. Try as he might he couldn’t think of what it made him feel. The nearest he could come was the word safe. John still didn’t know why he even wanted to be picked up and hugged sometimes. It was like a magnet. Carrying him to the living room, Mom explained “You have one hour before you get changed for bed, and then snuggle time and milk. What would you like to do?” “Tablet, please.” With a nod she sat him down on the couch, plopped a pillow next to him. His feet were swung around on the couch, and finally a throw blanket was draped over his legs and his tablet was offered to him. As a kiss was deposited on his head, he was left to himself. He looked briefly at the icons for the puzzle games, but felt mentally tired enough to just go back to his book. He was barely thirty pages in when he was patted on the shoulder. Apparently his hour was already up. It was a little annoying to find out that his diaper was wet when she pulled the blanket back and gave it a squeeze. And for the second time in probably three hours he was back on the changing table. This time it was one of the ridiculous overnight diapers that was pulled out from the table. Seemingly as an afterthought he stopped her “Wait!” Mom blinked down at him “Yes?” “Before you do that, may I try the potty?” He pleaded as cutely as he could manage. With a smile and a nod, she bumped the table and picked him up and carted him, sans underwear, to the bathroom. As she placed him on the toilet, he nodded seriously, thinking 'This is it. It’s time.' before making a face as he concentrated. As he managed to do his business in both ways, he could see Mom smiling in the corner of his vision, clearly proud of him. But he didn’t need her to be proud, he needed to know that he could still at least manage to go in the potty ...err… Toilet. He still wasn’t allowed to reach for the toilet paper and wipe himself. But for now, this was enough of a success. As he was cleaned up and carried back, he pondered the catch twenty two he had found himself in. He had to wear a diaper. It got changed when it got used. And he had to wear it because it got used. He couldn’t physically get onto the potty so going in the diaper was inevitable. And since the diaper got used, the diaper was needed. Rinse, Lather, Repeat. John chuckled to himself as he thought out loud: “Wipe, Powder, Repeat” Mom tapped him on the nose as she finished taping him into the ridiculous night time diaper and asked “What was that?” “Oh, I was just mumbling to myself.” As she picked him up stretched his arms and legs out as far as he could before wrapping himself around her torso. The entire atmosphere of the house seemed more relaxed as he was handed Rupert on the way to the living room. Mom had a fresh warm blanket that she had tossed in the dryer for a few minutes. She held him with one arm as she leaned back in the rocking chair and tossed the blanket over them in one well practiced motion. He was snuggled up against her chest and cradled in place with her arm as the warmth from her body and from the blanket started to soak into his body and make him relaxed. “Hey John?” Opening one eye to peak up he asked “Hmm?” “I’ve read many cases that littles find skin to skin contact comforting.” All he could do was shrug “I don’t know?” The question came from above him “Do you want to find out?” It didn’t make much sense to him, but he just said “Sure.” So first she pulled off his shirt, which was the only thing that he was wearing aside from his diaper. And then she wormed out of her own shirt, shuffling him around to get it off of her arm before getting the blanket back in place and idly stroking her fingertips up and down his back. Before he had felt warmth. But now it was on another level, warmth from her belly and ribs directly into his side and arm. A pacy was slipped into his mouth, and he didn’t fight it. He was trapped in a wondrous cocoon. He felt warm, his head was directly on a chest, and everything from the smell from her skin to his own pressed against her just seemed perfect. And that was how they spent their usual 20-30 minute snuggle that night. Eventually a bra strap was lowered and it was time for him to breast feed. It still felt a bit awkward to be an adult being breastfed. But the moment milk made its way to his tongue, none of that mattered. Somewhere along the way he was pried off the nipple with a finger and then moved to the other one. To his credit he felt proud that he thought he drained the other one fully before falling asleep. (He didn’t even come close)