nenog613

you know...i'm starting to suspect you might not be an AB

currently wearing an oversized Walgreens store brand diaper that i wear for bed (not because i have accidents, but because i'm afraid i'll have an accident and it gives me peace of mind)

i feel for ya, buddy. i'm going to have to have the talk soon too. for sure with a therapist, and likely with my parents (i'll try to leave the whole wearing for arousal out of that conversation, but its not hard to connect the dots). the good news is the whole diaper/sex thing isn't my fault, its the result of childhood trauma. the bad news is doesn't make it any less embarrassing, it makes it a hell of a lot more. its difficult to use the "i just like the way they feel" or "it calms my stress" excuse when the origin of both it and my social anxiety is "when i was seven a woman took my clothes off, touched me, put me in a diaper, and made me wear it in front of my friends, humiliating me". so fun times to be had by all, i'm sure.

no, because i want to control diapers instead of diapers controlling me. i want to wear them because i like to, not because i need to.

they stop when they see the bartender. the sissy turns and says, "I'm so embarrassed. He has on the same dress as me!"

like many, one of my favorite things to do in a diaper is wet them. i like to hold it as long as possible so when i do go its a lot. and when i do finally go, i like to put my hand on the outside of the diaper and feel it expand. one of my biggest fantasies is to be with another diapered person and feel their diaper as they wet it, then have them feel my diaper as i wet it.

i remember it pretty clearly, at least the good parts. right now i'm very confused about what turned out to be a pretty significant moment in my life, and its made me realize i've buried a lot of the negative stuff way down deep

i'd try to press your doctor on the issue. if you have anxiety it could be affecting you more than you realize. my issue is that i've had anxiety most of my life, i just never knew it. its kind of like that line from The Worlds End: "How do you know you're drunk if you're never sober". i didn't think i had a problem, but all the signs where there, i just couldn't see them. like i'd always have a knee-jerk excuse of why i don't date. when i was in high school, it was i was young and there was time to date later. 18 it was because its a time to be single and play the field. when i was in the military it was because i didn't want to have to leave my girlfriend (or worse wife) behind while i went on deployment. and so on and so forth with more excuses. i said them so much i started to believe them. and its not just relationships. i have a hard time asking for things from people and needing help, so doing something simple like asking for a job i find very embarrassing (when they say they're not hiring, for some reason i don't take it as they're in fact not hiring, i take it as they just don't want to hire me), which shockingly has led to difficulty finding employment. and if you going to some type of counseling, its important to be completely open and honest (and as i type this i realize i'm going to have to eat those f***ing words when i gotta do the same damn thing). as the great philosopher Tony Soprano once said, "Talkin' helps. Hope...comes in many forms." and to answer your confusion, therapy is a generalized term for counseling (psychologist, marriage counselor, etc.). a psychiatrist has a medical degree and can prescribe medication

i'm in the same boat with you (actually probably a lot more complicated). i recently remembered the incident that started my abdl-ism, and it wasn't a very pleasant memory. in addition to being a very troubling memory, it also was like it turned a light on and i could finally see everything about my life for the first time. i just thought i was shy and quiet, and that's fine and normal, but its actually a lot more severe. my shyness has prevented me from not only dating and sex, but has also kept me from seeking employment. pretty soon i became very depressed and sought out a counselor, but they didn't haven an appointment for several days. so i made the appointment and spent the rest of the week agonizing over it and wishing that i could forget it and just go back to the way i was. then the strangest part of the mess happened. on the day of the appointment, which i had to get up early for, when i woke up it suddenly felt like the whole thing never happened. that the basic incident was still the same, but nowhere near as bad as i made it out to be. so now i'm extremely confused about where the bad version actually happened and my brain is lying to me to make the stress stop, or if the not so bad version happened and it somehow got grossly exaggerated in my head for some unknown reason. i go to the counselor, tell her i had this memory and how for some reason now it didn't happen, and tell her it also made me realize that my shyness is a lot more complicated than i thought. she's recommended i see a therapist, and i'm going back later this week to help get referred to one. so now i have to go see a therapist because whether or not my memory if the incident is accurate, i still have severe social anxiety issues and that incident still plays a major role in that. which means lucky me i've got to do the one thing i've been deathly scared of doing since i was seven: letting someone know i wear diapers for sexual arousal. so i'll tell you my story if you tell me yours.

currently sporting a rearz princess pink. was going solely diaper since putting it on, but just wet myself and put on a pair of teddy bear plastic pants so i don't leak on anything

i go to the potty

what all sites sell adult training pants, and what are your favorite ones? while i don't feel comfortable/confident wearing a diaper in public, i would not be unopposed to wearing training pants regularly. right now i have four baby pants (dinosaurs, butterflies, kitties, and cupcakes) and three rearz (princess, lil monsters, and safari), and i'm looking to buy some more. if not for wearing regularly, at least something comfy to lounge around the house in.

i'd argue i have a sissy side more than an ab side. to me, i've always considered ab to be non-sexual. they're people who enjoy dressing and acting like babies, but no climbing into bed with mommy to "learn how to be a big boy". sissy on the other hand i've always felt was extremely sexual since i see it purely as erotic humiliation. if an ab does a bad thing they're put in time out, but if a sissy does a bad thing they're mocked and ridiculed because they're "a pathetic loser who could never please a woman". however i think my definition of sissy is different than most peoples because i feel any form of sexual humiliation with abdl is sissy, so wearing a regular depends (which most would consider just to be dl) is just as much of a sissy as wearing a pink diaper, rumba pants, a little dress, and sucking on a bottle.

while i have never drank mine or anyone else's pee, nor ever had any interest in drink mine or anyone else's pee, i do have the urge of...cleaning a woman with my tongue right after she's peed

i've never thought about it, but actually no. since i haven't had to wear nightly protection since i was 14, i'm not used to sleeping with a diaper on. whenever i wear one to bed i usually think it'll be fun, but when i wake up i find the inner part of my legs slightly sore due to the thickness of the diaper, the leg holes have dug into my skin a bit and irritated them, and the waist has bunched up and is really digging in.

simple. get some boxes and pack them and some other things up yourself (which i had to do when i left the military and moved back home), or go to walmart or something and buy a trunk you can lock (which i did when my parents where helping me move into my apartment)

i'm not a furry so can't say for sure, but i don't think there is a difference (unless you mean a larger size to fit over the costume). really they're made for abdl but used by furies (much like clothing made for women but worn by men)

i think the price is the price, so you gotta pay it. and i think the reason the price is so high is because they're more custom made than you average store brand diaper, so they have to charge more to offset the price of making them. i wish print diapers were cheaper. they're cuter and more fun than depends, but at four times the price, and lets be honest serving the exact same function, they're a luxury item

i bought a plain white happy endings a few months ago (along with four pairs of baby pants trainers), and its probably going to be the only one i get. i found the coverage on it to be very minimal. maybe its just me, but i'm not interested in low-rise diapers. can't really speak to the absorbency since i can't wet my training pants because i don't have a washing machine and would have to launder them publicly, but it seems like there would be a significant chance of leakage.

thanks, i'll keep that in mind, but i shouldn't have to go diaper shopping for a while. when i was at the store i picked up four packs of diapers (the rearz and three abu), plus i got a 16-pack of depends a few days before which i'm i'd be more inclined to wear on the regular (i save the special diapers for special occasions). plus i've still got a bunch of diapers i've had for several years now. i really wish cute diapers weren't so expensive. i've been dying to get some bambino magnificos since i first saw them a couple weeks ago (and abu peekABUs, but they're sold out), but they're $40 and i've spent way too much on abdl stuff recently

i always called my a deedee who the hell is sucking on doo doo?

i get nervous buying diapers when in truth i shouldn't. if i buy them at the store i get embarrassed because if feel they know what i intended to do with them, when the fact is they probably don't know or care what i'm doing with them since abdl isn't widely known. and if i order online i'm worried they'll put either the company name or product name on the shipping, and so so when it gets to the office at my apartment, they'll know i'm an abdl. but the truth is if i got a box and the shipping said "Rearz: 1x Safari", they most likely wouldn't know it was unless they were either an abdl or followed the abdl lifestyle

for me it's mental. since I lay down flat to put on diapers, whenever I sit it feels like it's shifted and I don't have a proper seal on my leg, so if i wet I think I'm going to leak, so I don't do it unless I'm standing

due to abdls not really being an out, loud and proud massive group of people, i had never really talked to another abdl until i joined this forum. i've met a couple of people on webcam sites and its usually "you like wearing diapers? i like wearing diapers! lets watch each other wear diapers...okay, that was fun. bye." as such, i've never talked about being an abdl nor thought deeply about why i do it. its basically been "i like wearing diapers because its humiliating, which turns me on". however, since joining and being able to talk about being an abdl, i've opened up not only to others but myself about wearing diapers, which has unlocked some things. in a thread about why you think you became an abdl, i recalled the incident that started it for me. in short, i had an accident at daycare and had to wear a diaper. in trying to articulate why i thought wearing a diaper left such a big imprint, since if i wore a pull-up it wouldn't have been as impactful because i had to wear them before when i had accidents and i wore them to bed every night for bed wetting, i remembered that the reason i had to wear a diaper was because the daycare worker wanted to shame me as punishment and she humiliated me in front of all my friends (which is psychological child abuse). that revelation has caused me to take a deep hard look at myself, and i believe a lot of what i though was just my personality are actually long-standing issues that stem from that incident, and they're issues i need to deal with because they've had a tremendous impact on my life. for instance, i have a very difficult time needing things from people or asking them for help, which makes it hard to ask someone for a job (i actually get embarrassed when people tell me they're not hiring, because for some reason to me it doesn't feel like they're not hiring, its that they just don't want to hire me). how this relates to coming out as an abdl: i think i need therapy to help deal with these issues, but i'm about to graduate college, have no job (going to school on gi bill, which stops when i graduate, and student loans, which i have to start paying back when i graduate), and entering a career where the best chances of gainful employment are elsewhere (so i need money to move there), which means i'm living on limited funds. so for therapy (which i think will greatly help me be able to get a job) i am either going to have to turn to my parents for help paying out of pocket, or go through insurance, which my parents pay for because i'm on limited funds. either way, before i go to therapy i going to have to talk to my parents (or at least my mom) about it, because they're going to want to know why i need to go and what made me realize i need to go, which means i have to tell them i wear diapers (and the inevitable why), which is something i've desperately been trying to keep secret from them for decades.

for looks, out of what i've worn i gotta pick abu super dry kids (but just discovered the bambino magnifico and really want to try, cause i gotta give them a slight edge over super dry kids in looking like a real baby diaper) for feel however, i have to go with rearz. i picked up a pack of princess pink today, and while i haven't had a chance to wet them yet, the form and feel is what i've been looking for since i was a teenager