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For the Cloth Diaper Lovers and their Panties of choice.


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    • Oh my!  Making "cow pies" in your diaper at the store!  I guess you did need a spanking, but pooping your diaper again while she was spanking you?  Shame on you!  
    • Chapter 3 – Humiliated Now I was alone again. I looked at the house again. It was a nice cottage, and I started to walk up to the house. I followed the path and halfway I heard people talking. It didn’t sound like a big party, but apparently we wouldn’t be alone. I felt my heart go a bit faster and I realized that I was dressed like a teenager. I had forgotten that, or at least had pushed those feelings away. Now suddenly I felt silly and a bit out of place. I was an adult, but currently I didn’t show that. Tom appeared around the corner. Did he expect me? Had Andrew called him, or had let him otherwise know that I had arrived? I looked at Tom and all of my anxiety suddenly faded. As soon as he saw me he smiled at me. He spread his arms out and walked towards me. “I am so glad you came.” He said. He bent over to me and kissed me, on the lips. Not too long, though. “And I’m so happy that you trusted me.” He said. He hugged me, and I put my arms around him. He was taller than me and the top of my head was resting against his shoulder. I had so many questions I wanted to ask him, first and foremost about the dress and the pull-up, but now I my body rested against his, it felt that all that could wait. He let go of me and our delightful hug ended. He looked at me and smiled face to face. “You are so beautiful like this.” He said. I was a bit fazed by the ‘like this’ addition. His hand caressed my forehead and pushed my hair aside. He kissed me again, a bit longer this time. Then he suddenly picked me up. His hand under my diapered bottom and the other behind my back. He lifted me up and held me close. It took me a second before I realized what happened and I folded my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. Our faces were so close now and I could push my lips against his cheek. There was no worry that my lipstick would leave evidence of that. He was so strong, but he did need to reposition me a bit. I felt his hand under me and realized that his hand was touching my pull-up. In fact, my pull-up was being squished on his hand by my weight. He didn’t say anything about it, but he must have felt that I had done what he wanted. “I wasn’t sure you would come.” He said softly. “So I have some friends over, but they will leave soon and then we are alone. Is that OK?” He asked me. I blushed a bit and nodded. With me in his arms he turned around and we walked into the garden. I saw three guys standing around a barbecue. “This is Jessica.” I heard him say loudly. He was looking at his friends so I was facing the other way. Tom turned around a bit and I could see his friends. They all looked nice. Not as nice as Tom, but they seemed friendly. They all looked at me curiously. I didn’t know what they knew, but I suppose they saw a young girl in the arms of his friend. A girl wearing a colorful dress. I was a bit afraid of what they would think of me. They all looked like a bit older than me, but I was looking so much younger at the moment. They had no reason to think that I was an adult. I wore a childish dress, looked very natural without make-up, and then he also still held me in his arms. He had lifted me as if I was a child, and despite loving the feeling to be in his arms, I now wanted out. I wanted to stand on my own. I had trouble enough posing as an adult, and being held in his arms didn’t help. I tried to wiggle out of his arms and he felt what I wanted to do. He slowly let me down and my feet were almost on the ground again. I did suddenly feel that my dress was being stuck and as soon as my feet touched the ground I knew that my underwear was exposed. I was standing with my back to his friends and I knew they were looking at my butt. It shouldn’t be hard to recognize that I wasn’t wearing normal underwear, but that I was wearing a pull-up. Maybe they even thought I was wearing a real diaper. “Oh, wait. Sorry.” I heard Tom say. He sounded a bit worried. He pulled his hand back and the dress fell into place, but it was too late. I felt a wave of humiliation and shame wash over me, almost overwhelming me. Anger was there too now my secret was out. I looked up at Tom, not wanting to look behind me. These must have been looking at me and I couldn’t imagine what they were thinking of me. I didn’t want to see the faces of them, and I could never look them in their eyes again without the feeling of ultimate shame. “She is a bit shy.” I heard Tom say with a contained laugh, and that made me even angrier. I looked up at Tom, but he wasn’t looking at me. I clenched my fists, and I even hit him on the chest with one, just to get the attention. “No! That’s not fair. You know that… I don’t need… ” I started, but I didn’t want to shame myself even more by mentioning the pull-up. I wanted his attention. I needed his attention. I felt I had done what was asked of me, but now it had gone too far. Not only weren’t we alone, I held him also responsible for exposing my shame to the group. This was his fault, not mine. And it had been enough. Tom looked at me, finally. He did look a bit concerned, but I still saw him smiling a bit. “I’m… No… I’m going to take it off.” I said firmly. I turned around and looked at the house. The back door was open and it wouldn’t be that difficult to find a place to tear that ghastly thing from my hips. A hand stopped me. His fingers folded around my arm. He didn’t squeeze, he just stopped me. He looked at me and shook his head. “Let’s find a quiet spot to talk. Is that OK?” He said. He had to see the anger now, and this was not the reaction from Tom that I expected. I wanted to see compassion in his face. He should have supported me, instead of laughing and saying that I was a bit shy. I nodded. I had no choice. With his hand still on my arm we walked to the back of the garden. The nicely trimmed grass stopped here, but under an old tree there was a picnic table. He sat down at one side and gestured me to do the same on the other side. “Why? What’s the deal with the… the pull-up. You know I don’t need.” “No, stop.” His voice was calm, but firm. “We are not discussing that now, Jessica.” He looked me in the eyes. “I invited you here, I set the conditions, and you accepted. You came here, voluntarily. I didn’t push you, or convince you, or put you on any other pressure. I just asked and you came.” I looked him in the eyes. I was flabbergasted. He was right of course, I came here on my own accord, but that didn’t mean that I deserved an explanation for what I was wearing at the moment. He had simply cut off my questions and complaints, and told me exactly what had happened. Calm, reasonable, and convinced of his own truth. It felt he had put me in my place. I felt so uncomfortable, and it wasn’t just the pull-up I felt underneath me, and that was squished unevenly beneath me and the wood. It was the whole situation that was uncomfortable. I felt small and childish, as if the clothes that I wore had blead into my feelings. I still felt angry and humiliated, and it didn’t feel that he did anything to help me. I was already contemplating going home again, even if that felt as a defeat. I wanted to stay, at least for the evening. I wanted to talk to him, get close to him and feel his warmth. And I wanted to kiss him again. “I understand you have a lot of questions, and it’s OK to be a little angry at me. I’m sorry about what happened, and I can understand that you didn’t want that to happen.” He tried to comfort me. “We can talk later, we can even talk all night of you want, but right now my friends are here and I am going back to them and have a good time. You have a choice too. You can either stay here sulking, or you can cheer up and join me over there.” His hand reached out over the table and his fingers gently caressed my face. He stood up but looked down on me for moment more. He bend over and kissed me on my forehead. “Why don’t you stay here for a few minutes to compose yourself and then come join us? Is that a plan?” He said. That didn’t help. I stood up, angry as I was, and I was already ready to go home. I felt like he treated me like a child, and this was going a bit too far. I had been willing to grant his extraordinary wishes, but it stopped here. But Tom didn’t let me go. He grabbed me and pulled me close to him. He hugged me and kissed me on the top of my head. “What’s the matter? Is it all a bit too much for you? Do you need a bit more time?” I heard him whispering in my ear. “No, stop. I… I don’t like this… I…” I mumbled. I tried to break free from his hug, but that wasn’t that easy. He released me and I stepped backwards. “Are you just a bit tired?” He asked. “Did you go out again, last night? What time did you get home?” “What? No… Yes, I did go out, but… I was home around four, but… That has nothing to do with this.” I was confused and even a bit upset that he tried this to pin on me. As if I was the reason that this was all so strange and confusing. Tom was the one who wanted me in a pull-up. Tom was the one who wanted me in this ridiculous dress. This was his fault, not mine. And it had nothing to do that I only had a few hours of sleep last night. He laughed. His face was all cheerful, and he gave me a gentle, but playful, push. “O, I think it has everything to do with that.” He must have seen my confusion, but ignored that completely. “I have a new plan. Come with me.” He stuck his hand out, open and inviting, for me to grab. Did he really want me to take his hand? I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to stay, but it didn’t feel fine here. I didn’t want to go home, but I didn’t want to be treated like a child. There were still so many questions that I wanted to ask. There were so many answers that I needed. I felt I had the right to get answers, but I knew I wouldn’t get them now. “Please come with me, Jessica. I want to get back to my friends.” He said, and for the first time I felt his voice get a bit darker. He seemed to lose his patience. I felt myself tremble a bit. I had never seen him angry, or even annoyed. I had to admit that I didn’t really know him, but until now I had only seen hum smiling and laughing. I wasn’t afraid, it was just unease that I felt, and that made me take his hand. He started walking, slowly and I followed him closely, still holding his hand. “Maybe it wasn’t fair of me to have some friends over. Now I can’t give you my full attention yet, and you deserve that. You deserve my full attention and you will get that soon.” We stepped into his house, but I didn’t see much of it. We immediately took the stairs. I walked two steps behind him, but he was slow and helped me up. “But I think you urgently need some sleep, so why don’t you lie down for a bit and then I come get you when they are gone.” I almost laughed, albeit a cynical one. Did he just sent me to bed like a child? Did he think that this was the solution for my problem? For our problem? He guided me to his bedroom. It wasn’t a big bedroom, but there was a large king size bed, and a closet against the wall. It was all made of dark wood, almost black, but the carpet was light and it all looked clean and organized. He pulled the duvet back and walked to the closet to grab a shirt. He held the shirt in front of me. I hadn’t decided to go to bed yet. I felt embarrassed and humiliated. I felt like Tom thought I misbehaved and that he put me to bed as a punishment, like a child. It didn’t matter that maybe he was right, and that I was a bit tired, but I didn’t misbehave. I was perfectly right to demand some answers. Tom just stood there, waiting for me to take the shirt. He smiled at me and shook his head. “You want me to help you?” He laughed, but it wasn’t a mean laugh. He was just trying to be friendly, but he did want to encourage me. “No!” I almost shouted. I didn’t want to undress myself in front of him, and I didn’t want to go to bed, and I definitely didn’t want to sleep, but it felt like I had no choice. I grabbed the shirt, turned my back to him and took off the dress. I was very unsecure about the pull-up, but he already knew I was wearing it and I just didn’t care anymore. I wanted this to end, and the fastest way was to do want he wanted and get into bed. I threw the dress on the bed and put on the shirt. It was way too big for me, but perfect for me to sleep in. It hid my underwear from view and that was already a big plus. Tom picked up the dress from the bed and hung it on a clothes hanger and put it back in the closet. I sat on the bed and took of my shoes and socks. I looked up at Tom and hesitated. Tom noticed. “The bathroom is through there.” He pointed at a door. I blushed. Yes, I needed to use the bathroom, but now it felt that he wanted me to use the bathroom before I got into the bed. It really felt like he treated me like a barely potty-trained toddler, and I hated that. But I needed to use the bathroom, so I quickly stood up and almost ran out of the bedroom. The bathroom door was open and I went through. I found the light switch and closed the door. I lifted my shirt, pulled the pull-up down, sat on the toilet and peed. A minute later I was washing my hands. I tried not to think about what was happening. It all felt so absurd. I really wanted to be alone with Tom. We needed to talk, and then everything would be clear. This couldn’t be anything other than a big misunderstanding. I just had to swallow my pride for a moment, rest for a few hours and then everything would be OK. I washed my hands and I was ready to go back into the bedroom, but then I noticed the pack of pull-ups on the shelf. It was opened, but still almost full. The one I was wearing right now was probably the only one missing from the package. But there was another pack and it was a different one. I was curious and I couldn’t resist myself. The other package was also opened, but it was mostly hidden behind the pack of pull-ups. But I took one step closer I could already see what it was. It wasn’t another pack of pull-ups, the other package contained diapers, with tapes. That one was also already opened, and one diaper was halfway sticking out, as if it had been removed but had been put back. Like the pull-ups, the diapers were pink, but the diapers were so much thicker than the pull-ups. The diapers were the same size as the pull-ups, size small, and the only conclusion I could make were that, like the pull-ups, the diapers were meant for me too. I grabbed the diaper that was already half out of the package, and pulled it all the way out. The plastic was cold and shiny and with a shiver through my spine I looked at the diaper in my hand. Were these really meant for me? Did Tom wanted me to wear diapers? I couldn’t believe it. This kept getting stranger and stranger.  
    • Abena L4 this afternoon.  I had to run around to several stores to get stuff for Thanksgiving and that took me a while.  Got home at 2:45, put everything away and got a diaper on.  Decided not to wear one out shopping.  I can hardly get my jeans buttoned without a diaper on!
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