Getting Surgery in Mexico

[DAQ]

16 hours ago, Don Incognito said:

I've wondered how removing the lower sphincter through the abdomen (instead of chewing up the urethra to get to it) would change the risk factors there. Though it probably wouldn't have any real advantage if the muscle can't easily be separated from the urethra.

That or leave the sphincter muscle alone and sever the nerve that drives it. Though tampering with the nervous system obviously has its own risks.

I think the other issue maybe the muscles response to severed nerves. I read a story of someone who had botox into the spincter for UAB and instead of being relaxed open the muscles were forced closed until the botox wore off.

[nappyboymids]

Hey Reddy

Thanks for sharing your journey with us over the last few weeks - I'm pretty awestruck by your decision and courage to carry it through.  Hope everything turns out as you want it.  And I must admit that I can't think of a more beautiful sight right now than you dribbling constantly and uncontrollably.

One of many questions though it may be too early to answer; if you've followed the discussions about stents you may know that often the stent doesn't seem to work so well in bed at night, perhaps something to do with gravity and angles changing compared to being upright; I was wondering if you'd experienced something similar, i.e. waking up at night with the need to pee - or are you going straight through and waking up soaked?

[Diapered Dave]

And now, people AROUND THE WORLD (ok, maybe a slight exaggeration... ) await Reddy's comments on how his first diapered day at work went!! Was it better than expected? Worse than expected?  Did he leave work with wet socks?? Oh, the suspense!! 🤔😀😳

[VA diaper boy]

1 hour ago, Diapered Dave said:

And now, people AROUND THE WORLD (ok, maybe a slight exaggeration... ) await Reddy's comments on how his first diapered day at work went!! Was it better than expected? Worse than expected?  Did he leave work with wet socks?? Oh, the suspense!! 🤔😀😳

The transition when you’re actually incontinent needing diapers is doable but self conscious to start.  I’m curious how his first day was too.  It does indeed get alot easier with time and knowing how to handle the variety of situations.  

[Old_PA]

8 hours ago, Craisler said:

The problem with taking the abdominal route to the sphincter is that you are now in the realm of open surgery cutting through the skin and abdominal muscles to get to the sphincter.  The TURP route has a faster recovery and less likely chance of infection. 

My inner sphincter and prostate were removed by robotic keyhole surgery going in through the navel after some prostate cancer was found 9 years ago.

[Craisler]

10 hours ago, Old_PA said:

My inner sphincter and prostate were removed by robotic keyhole surgery going in through the navel after some prostate cancer was found 9 years ago.

If I were dealing with prostate cancer, I’d ask for exactly the procedure you had.  It is definitely an improvement over the older open surgery technique with a quicker recovery and fewer abdominal muscles disrupted.  However, it still has exposed incisions that are potential sources of infection. 

Were you able to regain bladder control after the surgery?

[Reddy]

On 2/26/2024 at 8:15 PM, foreverdl said:

I have very little cum out when I cum, I had the snip snip 35 or so yrs ago , But with my pee dribbling , and then I play, I will sometimes have the sticky feel a half hour after I cum. And even if I don't feel the cum I have the head stick to my diaper later after I am diapered up. But it's all cool. I do think a part of the cum goes back up and then comes out when you pee. So if you were to get head? that person may need to know you have pee in the cum. But it sounds like you already know it.

I had a weird experience.  My first cum, nothing came out.  Then on Monday night I came twice and ejaculated big loads each time.  Then last night, completely dry.  It's confusing.  It might be an off and on thing apparently.

 

On 2/26/2024 at 8:30 PM, superabsorbantpolymer said:

Yep stress testing diapers is important, every brand and model is different an will fail in new and surprising ways. I imagine your constant drip will make leaks less likely as the diapers are able to absorb your urine over time. You might even get away with pull ups to be honest, I wear pull ups (northshore go supreme or abena) at work and they're super discreet. You might even be able to use a bladder protection pad like double stop or dynadry if you don't mind changing more often.  As long as I leak often and little and change when I need to (every couple hours) they're pretty decent. I'm sure you'll learn what works for you. Obviously I love diapers and prefer a thick diaper whenever possible but part of being an incontinent person is adapting to the situation.

So far I like relatively thick diapers at work.  I soaked them yesterday.  So far today not as much.  I might love pull ups but I don't trust the capacity yet.

On 2/26/2024 at 8:32 PM, Diapered Dave said:

I think you said a while back that you had a crap-ton of disposable diapers on hand... However, NOW you're in the real world of incontinence and diaper dependence.  You probably have different diaper brands, of different absorbencies.  As you get a routine down, and know when you'll need a thin diaper or a thick diaper, you'll probably want to inventory what you've got of each kind, so you can re-order ahead of time. I've been surprised a couple times, when I waited to long to order my diapers, and then the supplier was out of stock!!! ( Case in point,    LL Medico is STILL out of BetterDry Large diapers - My favorite! ) 

Also, as you probably know, cloth diapers and plastic pants DO cost a lot up front, but over time, the cost per use is much lower than disposable diapers... I have some cloth diapers that are close to 10 years old, and I still use them.

I am probably going to use cloth diapers at night sometimes.  I like to take them off in the shower, shampoo up, step on the diapers to clean them, and hang them dry.  I just need to fish them out of storage and get them in rotation.

I am surprised, I had no plan really, but I ended up wearing wellness original briefs to the office yesterday and today.

 

20 hours ago, nappyboymids said:

Hey Reddy

Thanks for sharing your journey with us over the last few weeks - I'm pretty awestruck by your decision and courage to carry it through.  Hope everything turns out as you want it.  And I must admit that I can't think of a more beautiful sight right now than you dribbling constantly and uncontrollably.

One of many questions though it may be too early to answer; if you've followed the discussions about stents you may know that often the stent doesn't seem to work so well in bed at night, perhaps something to do with gravity and angles changing compared to being upright; I was wondering if you'd experienced something similar, i.e. waking up at night with the need to pee - or are you going straight through and waking up soaked?

Thanks!  Yeah the dribbling is kind of crazy.  I had to change my diaper twice at work yesterday because I was soaked, and both times in the few seconds between taking off my wet diaper and putting the new diaper on, I dripped uncontrollably on the floor and on my pants.

At night I sometimes wake up and sometimes don't.  But it seems that the bladder holds some urine while lying down and when I sit up, roll over, stand up, or move at all I flood the rest into my diaper.

18 hours ago, Diapered Dave said:

And now, people AROUND THE WORLD (ok, maybe a slight exaggeration... ) await Reddy's comments on how his first diapered day at work went!! Was it better than expected? Worse than expected?  Did he leave work with wet socks?? Oh, the suspense!! 🤔😀😳

Haha, sorry for not updating yesterday.  I was pretty tired.  Basically, it went great.  I was a little self conscious because my diapers were thick.  But it seemed fine.  Today I am already feeling more used to having a diaper on.  I had to change once at lunch time and once before driving home.  I was really soaking my diapers and I tended to notice by feeling how my diaper felt when I walked around.  When it felt thicker, heavier, wetter I knew I needed to change soon.  I didn't leak though!

[CountryRandy]

Not sure if you do this already or not but I found that keeping a small roll of clear packing tape a handy thing to keep in my diaper bag.  I have been down to my last diaper at work and had a tape break off when changing. 

[superabsorbantpolymer]

Wow that sounds so great, you are profoundly incontinent now. Do you carry a spare pair of pants in case your diaper leaks? 

It must be nice always having an empty bladder, I love that feeling of being drained when I have a catheter in. 

Re: pull ups, I think they're really great for exercise. I love running in them the support my junk and fit nicely under athletic shorts. I'm at the point where I can walk, strech, etc and pee at the same time so releasing often means they absorb quite a lot but if I flood it would be an issue (but you don't do that). You definitely need a heavy duty diaper for logger stretches tho, no pulling up/down to pp for you, ever again 😜

[Diapered Dave]

1 hour ago, Reddy said:

I had a weird experience.  My first cum, nothing came out.  Then on Monday night I came twice and ejaculated big loads each time.  Then last night, completely dry.  It's confusing.  It might be an off and on thing apparently.

It depends on whether you're facing north or south when you cum. You know, the magnetic poles and such. I read it on the internet, so it's gotta be true. 😆

 

1 hour ago, Reddy said:

So far I like relatively thick diapers at work.  I soaked them yesterday. 

Wow, that's great!  With the thick diapers, is it noticeable in the outline of your pants? In the few times I wore diapers to work, I had to watch out how much I wet, because the diaper would really swell up and create a very obvious diaper bulge.

 

1 hour ago, Reddy said:

Thanks!  Yeah the dribbling is kind of crazy.  I had to change my diaper twice at work yesterday because I was soaked, and both times in the few seconds between taking off my wet diaper and putting the new diaper on, I dripped uncontrollably on the floor and on my pants.

Often when I change my diapers and I don't want to leak in my pants, (When I have a stent in..)  I change while standing up, butt against the wall. I'll lower my pants to my knees, open up my new diaper and lay it open, on top of my lowered pants. Then I unfasten my wet diaper, and remove it. Any dripping urine just falls into my new diaper. Easy pezzy !!

1 hour ago, Reddy said:

At night I sometimes wake up and sometimes don't.  But it seems that the bladder holds some urine while lying down and when I sit up, roll over, stand up, or move at all I flood the rest into my diaper.

So is it the urge to pee that wakes you up? (When your bladder is holding urine..) Have you had any diaper leaks in bed yet?

 

1 hour ago, Reddy said:

Basically, it went great.  I was a little self conscious because my diapers were thick.  But it seemed fine.  Today I am already feeling more used to having a diaper on.  

So how's your frame of mind? Has it sunk in that you're REALLY incontinent? Are you enjoying your now true diaper dependence?

Any lingering soreness or pain from the operation? No more clots?

1 hour ago, CountryRandy said:

Not sure if you do this already or not but I found that keeping a small roll of clear packing tape a handy thing to keep in my diaper bag.  I have been down to my last diaper at work and had a tape break off when changing. 

Yeah, what he said!!!  I have also had almost a whole bag of diapers turn out to be defective.  I opened a NEW bag of diapers, while on vacation, and almost every one of them had one tape missing, in the same spot. Manufacturing defect.

[Craisler]

I’m glad things are going so well for you.  

I suspect you won’t be too happy with pull-up diapers when it comes time to change.  Most of the time you have to undress completely below the waist, including shoes, to get the wet diaper off and the new one on.

I’ve found that cloth diapers are economically the best choice around the house and for night use.  They don’t have the capacity of disposable diapers, but over time, they are a lot less expensive.  At night, they are less likely to leak.

Good luck, I’m certainly envious.  When I was your age, I would have jumped at the chance to do what you’ve done if such a procedure had been available.  As it is, I no longer really need to be incontinent to wear diapers.  Nearly everyone almost expects people my age to be wearing diapers and my underwear confirms their expectations.

[Don Incognito]

On 2/27/2024 at 4:10 PM, DAQ said:

I think the other issue maybe the muscles response to severed nerves. I read a story of someone who had botox into the spincter for UAB and instead of being relaxed open the muscles were forced closed until the botox wore off.

Yeah, I saw that. I don't suppose having a catheter in there while the Botox takes effect might prevent that?

 

On 2/27/2024 at 11:07 PM, Old_PA said:

My inner sphincter and prostate were removed by robotic keyhole surgery going in through the navel after some prostate cancer was found 9 years ago.

I'm pretty sure that surgical robots are still way too expensive for something like this - I wonder if manual laparoscopic surgery would work?

[Elfy]

So, Reddy... Is incontinence everything you hoped for and expected so far?

[Old_PA]

22 hours ago, Craisler said:

f I were dealing with prostate cancer, I’d ask for exactly the procedure you had.  It is definitely an improvement over the older open surgery technique with a quicker recovery and fewer abdominal muscles disrupted.  However, it still has exposed incisions that are potential sources of infection. 

Were you able to regain bladder control after the surgery?

Pretty well. I used pads for 10 weeks and on other occasions such as travelling when I think it might be wise. Passing wind with a full bladder is risky! Care needed. The big down side is total ED but it is worth it if you manage to get rid of the cancer. That was 9 years ago; so far so good. I am now soon 80.

[Craisler]

25 minutes ago, Old_PA said:

Pretty well. I used pads for 10 weeks and on other occasions such as travelling when I think it might be wise. Passing wind with a full bladder is risky! Care needed. The big down side is total ED but it is worth it if you manage to get rid of the cancer. That was 9 years ago; so far so good. I am now soon 80.

I’m glad to hear you’re doing well. 

[michael1538]

Hello Mr. Reddy, I know you have heard this before but I will still compliment you on your decision to have the surgery and become incontinent. That was possible something you had to think about for a long time before making that decision and now that it is done, you will have some life changing results. I would love to experience how your incontinence is working.

I have a couple questions.

I read in earlier postings that you were not a long time diaper user. You wore diapers at times but not for long periods of 24/7. Yet you still desired incontinence, which would result in you needing to wear diapers full time. When you made your decision to go through the surgery that made you incontinent, was it the full time need of diapers OR the full time incontinence that gave you the ammunition to go through with the operation?

In some later postings you have mentioned that you have tried masturbation after the operation. I have read about guys that masturbate and after the climax, they loose interest in wearing diapers for a while. I have also experienced that myself. Have you had those same feelings after climaxing before your surgery? How about now, now that you HAVE to be in diapers to control your pee. Does it still feel the same afterwords or are you working on changing your mindset that you MUST still wear a diaper? 

I have to say that since I made a commitment to myself to use diapers full time starting this year, When I do climax, either in a diaper or not, I will force myself (if necessary) to continue wearing a diaper. I will say that it is getting easier to put on a clean diaper or just continue wearing what I have on until  such time it is ready to be changed.

Again, CONGRATULATIONS with your decision. Most people won't understand it but there are those of us that do and I bet, most are jealous of your results. I wish you the best!

 

 

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[superabsorbantpolymer]

So, it's Friday. How did your first week of being an incontinent professional go @reddy? Any highlights? Leaks? Difficulty managing discretion?

I don't mean to pester you to share, just hope everything is going well 😊

[soggster]

In many ways this sounds like a case of BIID (now called BID but that's harder to Google for) - which is where someone's body doesn't match their internal idea of who they are. It's a very real condition and can to lead to people making attempts at "fixing" their bodies to match how they feel they should be. Sadly this is often done harmfully due to the lack of legal routes and understanding of BIID; so strong are the emotions that it's worth the risks and pain to many folk. So I'm very glad that Reddy has chosen to do it in the safest way possible.

Reddy, you have my best wishes - it's still an exciting time no doubt for you and us all reading along at home. When the excitement fades and the daily routines are figured out I'd still very much love to hear how you adapt and get on with things.

[michael1538]

Has anyone heard from Mr. Reddy or know how he is doing? I hope everything is OK for him.

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[Diapered Dave]

14 minutes ago, michael1538 said:

Has anyone heard from Mr. Reddy or know how he is doing? I hope everything is OK for him.

 

My guess... He's out buying more diapers.

[DAQ]

39 minutes ago, Diapered Dave said:

My guess... He's out buying more diapers.

Or least out using more 😃

[Craisler]

He did check the forum yesterday, but didn’t leave any updates. 

[Reddy]

Hi Everybody, I'm sorry for being absent, work was busy and then I spent the whole weekend out at my parents.  I got blocked up pretty bad during the week, but I associated it to restarting caffeine and quit that again yesterday (I even noticed my tight esophagus was much worse the days I was on caffeine).  I also used a catheter here and there just to pee, and then for a few hours at a time too.  Dr. Ivan said to go back to a catheter if I'm blocked, and also that we might need to see if I have developed a urethral stricture.  Obviously I don't know, but I feel pretty sure I have the stricture.  Over the weekend at my parents house I was blocked multiple times in the night and used a catheter once or twice.  Since the afternoon I've been back at my apartment.  Not wearing diapers.  Just relaxing in boxers.  Nothing is leaking whatsoever.  I want to find out about the stricture and also might ask Dr. Ivan about another surgery.  But first I'll see how the next days go.

[Diapered Dave]

Well, that SUCKS!!!  Ok, let's look at the bright side... You're saving on diaper use!  Hmm... Nope, it still sucks!

So  I wonder  if  wearing a larger size  catheter for a few  days,  or week,  will compress a stricture for a while??  Didn't BrownBobby use a catheter for his stricture? 

[superabsorbantpolymer]

Wow, sorry to hear that. so now you are only peeing via intermittent cath? You should get seen, maybe it's time to call the urologist you got the referral to? 

May as well keep a cath in at this point so as to keep things stretched.