What makes you feel self-conscious in front of your partner?

[Little Sherri]

Background: I went from secretly wearing diapers when I was alone, to eventually "coming out" to my wife about it, and now I wear diapers 24/7 and have for about 2.5 years. I remember the first time I showed my wife my diaper - it was a huge thrill, but it also felt like I was jumping off of a cliff with an untested parachute - would I survive? Lucky for me, my wife has been really tolerant. She's not into it at all, but, I can wear them and store them and spend money on them with minimal protestation. She has almost never expressed a preference or dislike for anything I have worn in front of her, although I keep the AB side of me toned way down, for the most part - no baby clothes other than some sober t-shirt onesies in black, and I sleep with a pacifier. 

In the beginning, I would only wear white medical-looking diapers in front of her, and then, I gradually started mixing in the occasional printed one, always with great trepidation. When she didn't protest or comment, I slowly integrated more printed diapers, and now I wear them at least half the time. Typically, after the kids go to bed, we'll retire to our room to watch a show or read, and I'll be in just a diaper and a t-shirt. 

However, there are still some things that make me have to take a deep breath and quell the butterflies in my stomach before undressing in front of her: printed diapers with a lot of pink on them, nursery print plastic pants, cloth diapers in general, printed or not, and, being in a noticeably wet diaper. Last night I had on a sober white Megamax, but I'd been in it all day, and when she claimed the bathroom as soon as we retired to our room, I knew that I was expected to stay in my sagging diaper until she was done - I don't change a wet diaper on our bed, I think that would be a bridge too far for her. I pulled a Rearz Lil' Splash diaper out of my drawer once I heard her finishing up, and planned to pass by her and go change myself, but when she came out of the bathroom, she wanted to have an in-depth conversation about buying appliances, and I was standing there exposed to double-Kryptonite - wearing a very wet diaper, and, holding a somewhat pink replacement for it. I was so distracted that I agreed to whatever she was proposing - she exclaimed delightedly that she thought the conversation was going to be more difficult. 

Is there anything in your wardrobe, or that you wish you had in your wardrobe, that would make you really self-conscious or embarrassed, to wear in front of your spouse or partner? Or are you bulletproof, confident, and unperturbable?

[oliver d]

My wife knows about my diapers.I only wear at night and she puts up with it and is not intrested.I have stood in front of her in a fully wet diaper and her only comment was cover it please.I on the other hand was red in the face as I did not expect her to simply barge into to the room like that.

[technomonkey]

I have been with my wife for almost 21 years now. Back in 2000 i was making money selling diapers on eBay. so the GF/now wife at the time was 18 i got her to model in a diaper for a display pic. she wanted a few $$ for doing it. once you have a pack open you cant sell it as i would say. now you have to be a diaper tester. so i got away with wearing diapers off and on. I mostly got to wear when she was gone or had to hide it under my clothing. when our kid came along she tried to make me get ride of my diapers but a year later i got a spinal cord injury and now have to wear diapers. I have got a few printed diapers and the wife is not in to that at all. i just tell her company's send them to me as samples. She goes off the deep end and says your not a F_ _ _en baby tell them to stop sending your this shit. The wife knows i wear 24/7 she sees the standard white diapers and don't pay much attention and more. I got a sample from bambino Red Bearon Landing Zone Diaper. i love how wide they are so i end up getting a case i had to hide them. I have found that getting ready for bed at night i can put one on and put a pair of boxers over it she never looks just thinks it my normal white northshorecare diaper. and with the kid back in school and with her back working out side of home i have all morning and most of after noon to wear around the house. I have never been able to get in to the AB side of things i know if i got and of that stuff and the wife would find it shit would hit the fan.

[Forced2wet]

I would have said initially the feminine/sissy disposables and pink frilly plastic pants that  I added to my stash over time but as my GF is the one that dresses me in my protective padding, and she chooses the girly colored options regularly, it’s not something I now worry about ?

[Snugglebear_69]

Honestly there's nothing that really worries me or makes me uncomfortable. My Daddy will change me when needed and He picks the cute pink or printed diapers so no embarrassment there. My Wife will often be in the room while He changes me as well, so again no issue.

They're comfortable and I'm comfortable because we've had all the conversations to make sure it isn't uncomfortable.

[BedWetMark]

Exactly like you @Little Sherri, as new nappy designs have come out over the years I've been brave enough to buy them, but I've always tested the water.  Over the last 9 or so years I've gone from plain plastic backed Tena Maxi, when that's pretty much all there really was that I was aware of, to discovering ABU, then Rearz and Tykables etc.  I think my first printed nappy was an ABU one. I left one out ready to change into and had a comment something like "bloody hell, don't you feel ridiculous wearing those with the children's pictures" or something (I think it was ABU Cushies) and I muttered something about wanting to try different brands etc., nothing more was said.

Since then, I've progressed to trying everything that exists and now even though (like you) I've had conversations with my wife whilst I'm wearing nothing but a nappy, I will make sure if that's going to happen then I'll wear something mostly white (ABU Peakabo is my go-to right now). I did order some pink plastic pants and nothing was said about those and genuinely I only ordered pink as nothing else was available in white - which I do prefer.

The first time I wore a nappy and onesie (snap crotch vest thing) in front of her I was very self aware, but nothing was said and we had an adult conversation. But I could never wear a non-plain onesie, as much as I'd love to, I don't think that would go down well.

Last week though we were on holiday and having got back to our holiday cottage after 7 hours of hiking, I showered and changed and got "ready for bed" (the 24/7 thing won't fly in my house, it's a no in front of other people, so I'm respecting that). But we were cooking in the cottage and didn't have any rice, so my wife, who was also in PJs asked me if I'd drive up to the local shop to get some. I'm wearing thin shorts, a thin t-shirt, thick Tykables and plastic pants. I said "like this?" and she was like "yes you're fine, don't worry". So off I plodded in shorts that I didn't think a good job of hiding what I was wearing, smelling of talc. I was actually kind of excited, but that's another thread ... 

[oznl]

Pretty much anything nappy-related because I know how much she hates it.

I go out of my way to conceal my nappies from her.  I don’t think she’s even seen me unclothed for months and months.  I dress and change out of her sight.

It’s more than just trying to navigate around her limits, I truly would feel incredibly self-conscious basking in the cold rays of her disapproval.

I demanded tolerance but I don’t think I can reasonably demand any participation and this extends to passive participation.

One notable exception: a few months ago early one morning in bed I was pole-axed by powerful hamstring cramps.  They were agonising.  I leapt out of bed and staggered around the room sweating with the pain whilst she looked on at me asking what she could do.  I was clad in a cookie-monster t-shirt and puffy white, terry-lined plastic pants over a reasonably wet night nappy but fashion considerations were OFF the agenda at this point.  Pain defeated self-consciousness.

I wouldn’t mind trying some of the heavier-duty ABDL nappies but I think the AB motifs they invariably come with would set her off.  She’s already called me out on my patterned cloth Rearz “Omutsu” nappies…  I just think the plain white ones looked a bit naf and plain white nappies inevitably end up yellowish-grey.

[Dartplayerinwvc]

had on a sober white Megamax ? Sober?

[Rob110]

My wife sees me all the time in my diaper as I usually only wear a diaper when at home, its been almost years of me dealing with a bladder issue and diapers  so no worries.

My wife's sister now lives in our building a few apts away when she Visits  now my wife no longer throws me something to quickly put on to hide my diaper I just relax and stay just in my diaper its a non issue.

 

 

 

[Whatsthatsmell]

Actually pooping my diaper.  She knows I wake up and poop in a diaper every day.  She had NO issues with it and will even sexually please me in a poopy diaper but I just can’t do it in front of her.  I have to leave the room. Then I come back and she will mush my load and ask my why I just went in the other room for just a minute lol.  

[Stroller]

Not much these days.  But I've yet to take off a wet nappy in front of Mummy, or to put on a nappy when she's in the room.  Laying a clean nappy out on the bed isn't a problem, baby print nappies aren't a problem.  She's just a bit squeamish about some things, so I have to introduce them gradually as I don't want to upset her.  She's accepted I'm in nappies full-time, and she's accepted that I'm a 2-year-old at heart, and there's no disapproval there.  And yes, she's happy enough for me to call here Mummy too.

[puffy_bottom]

Changing a wet diaper in front of my partner makes me feel self-conscious. Or when I have a bag of used ones and it's stinky.

 

[2sail2]

Before we got married I used the excuse that I had to wear at night.  One morning after showering, I was caught putting on some adult pull up.  She asked why I was wearing and I didn't say anything.  She still sees me once in a while with the waist band protruding out.  

[iamdaddydave]

My wife has known that I like to wear diapers more or less since we started dating but it's never something we have shared. It's been ages since I last mentioned it. I used to travel a lot for work and stay in hotels overnight, during those times I wear 24/7 if the situation allows it.

I have worn in front of her but hidden under my trousers, she has never let on if she noticed.

[wetmonkey]

My partner is supportive and knows everything about my ABDL but still I feel awkward wearing obvious diapers around her. Even though it's been close to three years of being with her and she has only been kind, thoughtful and supportive I still have an anxious fear I may push it too far and ruin it. This has way more to do with previous ex's who were not only not supportive or understanding but actually had resentment about it too that boiled over late into the relationship. It made me bad about communicating it with partner's and tend to hide every aspect of it away.

Now it's always ok to wear but I'm still more comfortable on my own than around her but it gets a bit better with time. It's honestly for me just so amazing to be able to talk about it all with her and explain what it all means to me. She shows great support sometimes by asking "Do you have enough diapers?" when I go away or if I have enough space for my diapers in certain parts of the apartment.

[Little Sherri]

On 9/15/2021 at 9:16 AM, wetmonkey said:

or if I have enough space for my diapers in certain parts of the apartment.

It's funny, but for me so far, the greatest point of resistance from my spouse has probably been co-opting space in the house. Which is funny because, first of all, she has a LOT of stuff - her business involves staging rooms for photography sometimes, so we have duplicates of a lot of furniture - side tables and lamps and chairs and plastic plants (almost said "plastic pants"...) etc.  And I also have hobbies that involve equipment that takes up space, none of which has ever been an issue. And yet when I add another case of diapers to the basement storage area, she'll comment about my needing yet more space for "my Pampers". She thinks I should have one, maybe two cases going, whereas I feel like I need four, minimum, and, right now I'm up to eight, only because of a restock. She sees them like they're cases of paper towels, whereas I look at them the way she looks at purses or shoes - the right diaper for one activity is not necessarily the right diaper for all activities. I need options, and variety is the spice of life. 

Speaking of variety, and getting back to what made me start this thread, last night, I donned my first Rearz Lil' Bella. I ordered a sample bag of them. The print on them is very cute, but I was more intrigued by the scent they are purported to be impregnated with. I love the smell of Pampers in particular - it takes me back in time in an instant, even though I'm pretty sure the Pampers I wore as a kid weren't scented (it was the 1980's). But the ones that I pined for in the years after I outgrew them were scented, and I loved that baby powder smell. 

The Lil' Bella's don't smell like baby powder - I'm not sure if maybe Pampers has a patent on that. These smell a bit like cotton candy, or like a candy store. It's a pleasant scent, and not overpowering, but scent preferences are very specific, so, these don't tick "that box" for me. Which is fine - I have baby powder-scented diaper cream and actual baby powder.

But, having bought these diapers, now I have to use them. Last night at about 10:30, I stood in our bathroom, contemplating the plain white Prevail that I had come in wearing - a sad, damp, thing, wetness indicator all lit up, that I had put on as a stop-gap while doing some sweaty yard work. I knew I would be showering afterwards, so I didn't want to put on an 8-hour diaper for a 3-hour shift. But there was hardly going to be a bigger contrast available than my walking past my wife in that thing, taking a shower, and then reemerging wearing what was waiting for me on the counter... a big plastic diaper adorned with purple and pink ponies, rainbows, stars, ice cream cones, and multi-coloured butterflies. I was going from a nursing home theme, straight to the nursery. Per the theme of this thread, I'm not sure why these things still get my blood pressure up, but, once I put on my juvenile diaper, I had to take a deep breath before emerging from the bathroom. Crunch-crunch-crunch... I walked out and past my wife. I had laundry piled on my side of the bed, so I couldn't seek immediate refuge under the covers... I had to distribute the items throughout my drawers. There was a stack of my onesies in a pile. My pacifier was sitting on my night table. I felt my cheeks redden. I don't know why, but I felt like I was under a spotlight and that I looked ridiculous. 

However, my wife was oblivious to all this. She started talking to me about appliances she wants to buy, as I walked back and forth in that cutesy diaper, avoiding eye contact, and gradually, I got over myself, eventually clambering onto the bed to look at a brochure of absurdly expensive fridges, and then settling down to read my book. The stress dissipated. The air held a delicate candy floss scent. Eventually, pacifier in place, I fell asleep.

Although it does not escape my notice that she seems to want to talk about buying expensive things, whenever my diaper is particularly childish. I think she knows that my ability to mount cogent, vigorous arguments is heavily suppressed under such circumstances. 

[wetmonkey]

Hi @Little Sherri

Thanks for sharing your experience as well, it's great to hear how another abdl navigates in their relationship and the feelings that come up with that.

Haven't tried the Rearz Lil' Bella's yet, though I was intrigued by their added smell, their other attempts at that I kinda liked actually.

I agree too that talking about adult decisions while diapered isn't easy

[Little Sherri]

I had another self-conscious moment earlier this week. My wife unexpectedly bought me a bag of Tena tabbed briefs at the drug store, because they were on sale for $14 for 16 diapers. To me, this represents poor value, because I loath those things, but, I guess she was trying to be nice. OR, it might have been another shot across the bow in her campaign to gaslight me into thinking people can hear my plastic diapers. Suspecting it was the latter, I fired back the next morning, by putting on a Rearz Select, a big, white plastic two-tab (one per side) retro-looking diaper. I had to get up early to drive my daughter to school, so I put on the requisite baggy cargo shorts and oversized sweatshirt for that part of the program, but once I got home, I noticed that she was in the bathroom, so I took the opportunity to strip down to just a shirt and a diaper, and then go about making breakfast. If she asked about it, I could say that it was for the benefit of my skin (my parents used to sometimes say that it was better for my skin not to wear anything over a diaper, which always confused me - how does my skin know I have something on over it? But I think they meant that snug clothing would hold the wet diaper in constant contact). She came down to make a coffee while I was making toast, and she didn't ask any questions, but she walked up behind me and pulled up my t-shirt, which startled me and took me momentarily aback - it almost felt like she was going to perform a diaper check, which is something she has NEVER done. All I could articulate was "Huh....?", to which she replied "Your shirt was tucked into your Pampers."  I had taken my diaper off for a #2 requirement, and then put it back on in my usual standing manner, trapping the back of it against the wall, and then taping it up at the front. I had a shirt on while I did this, and apparently, I'd enveloped the back of my t-shirt in the elastic of the diaper. I mumbled "thanks", but my face was red, and I'm not sure why... I'd wanted her to notice my diaper, and she had, but perhaps more than I'd intended.  

[IminWetPampers]

I’m incredibly grateful that my wife is also my mommy and I can wear any style or brand of diaper that I choose to and she is perfectly accepting of it. I typically wear just a shirt and a diaper or more frequently just a diaper when we’re at home. I can also freely wet and even mess my diaper right in front of her and she won’t bat an eye in fact she’ll encourage me to wet and/or mess my diaper and will even pleasure me in my poopy diapers. She likes it when I use my diapers for their intended purpose because I’m her big baby and babies wet and mess in their diapers (after all that is what they’re for). 

[Three Rivers]

Messing my diaper in front of my wife, she really doesn't care and is very supportive of all my diaper time and has been so for years now.

It just makes me feel really awkward sometimes.

[Little Cub Pants]

5 hours ago, IminWetPampers said:

I’m incredibly grateful that my wife is also my mommy and I can wear any style or brand of diaper that I choose to and she is perfectly accepting of it. I typically wear just a shirt and a diaper or more frequently just a diaper when we’re at home. I can also freely wet and even mess my diaper right in front of her and she won’t bat an eye in fact she’ll encourage me to wet and/or mess my diaper and will even pleasure me in my poopy diapers. She likes it when I use my diapers for their intended purpose because I’m her big baby and babies wet and mess in their diapers (after all that is what they’re for). 

You're so blessed to have a wife that would actually do that for you and likes that. I think most women like changing diapers and dealing with baby stuff. Which is absolutely great and wonderful for people like us!☺️???? That's why mommies are so sad to see their little ones grow up, but fortunately for them there are people out there that like being babies and have no desire to grow up and want to stay babies for ever. i.e us!?????❤️?????

[Young1]

Not feeling smart enough when i talk to my husband...... i never graduated HS but he went to a tech college and is very very smart

 

[LiL Marc]

On 9/15/2021 at 9:16 AM, wetmonkey said:

She shows great support sometimes by asking "Do you have enough diapers?" when I go away or if I have enough space for my diapers in certain parts of the apartment.

Wow! This is really beautiful coming from a partner, she really seems to love you for who you are

Take good care of her and love her the best you can, she deserve it

Saying this, I'm not throwing a stone at the one who hardly accepts and trying not to see it, sometimes I try to imagine a wife who loves her husband and feels safe with the powerful man she is with ... but this man also likes to wear diapers and or act like an adult baby, that must be hard

 

[vvp39]

Even after my wife accepted that I slept in plastic panties I would feel a bit awkward about putting them on in front of her. She didn't really like the idea that much even though she knew how much it meant to me, and we eventually ended up with me going to bed earlier in the evening, and she would use that time to be online. Most of the time I worked dayshift and would get up and shower etc. without her waking up. 

[Mr. Sea Otter]

My wife and I have been married for 6 years now, and I've been openly wearing diapers around her the entire time. My bladder control at this point is bad enough that she will insist that I wear a diaper at night. "I don't want you to pee on me again," had been said a couple of times on the rare occasions when I started drifting off without a diaper.

As a general concept though, she doesn't participate in anything diaper related, and it certainly isn't a part of our sex life or anything. Her only request has been for me to not wear 'hospital diapers' since she has changed too many of those professionally and really doesn't like me to remind her of a patient or something. 

All that said, I don't really like changing in front of her. It's happened many times, and she couldn't care less. But it does make me slightly uncomfortable. I do also get a bit nervous occasionally when I try a new brand or design. I recently bought some Rearz Bellas and Princess Pinks, which are very girly. It was still "swamp ass" hot, so I knew she would see them as I really prefer to just wear a tee shirt and a diaper whenever possible during that time of the year. So I was a bit nervous when I first wore them around her, although I don't know why. When she saw the it I think she said something like "Princesses huh? That's uh, very pink." I think I mumbled something about then being on sale. She just shrugged and moved on to whatever else we needed to talk about. She was a bit more intrigued when she saw the Bellas.

"What is that thing? A unicorn?"

"Uh, I'm not sure. I don't think it has a horn? A flying horse?"

"Huh, yea. What's the Greek thing?"

"A Pegasus?"

"Yea, maybe. Anyways, are you getting a haircut anytime before..."