Bettypooh

I didn't watch the talk, but I'm sure I can relate as I was a pantswetter through my childhood and pushed out of social situations because of that. You have no clue how rotten people really are until you have to deal with life from this perspective, and it's very very hard to overcome the bad things they've done to you over something which you could not help doing. It's still a daily struggle for me to not let my childish desires for revenge overcome my desires that nobody ever suffer needlessly even if they may have earned that without knowing it. Bettypooh

This might be a little bit excessive, but if you don't have problems with that much liquid intake then don't worry about it. We're all different in that regard. And this is one good way to get started toward the goal of true bedwetting. In time, the waking should become lesser until it's gone and you sleep right through wetting. Chase your dreams until you achieve them then don't let go Bettypooh

My sincerest wishes for you to have your problems resolved completely in the way you want things to happen. Have hope, for good things do happen and everything is possible. Bettypooh

I have what is now described as a "neurogenic bladder"; in other words numerous related and intertwined control issues which leave me in need of diapers. And I love wearing and wetting them too, which I'd now do even if my physical issues disappeared. I am simply supposed to be in diapers, always have been but wasn't, and now I am- it's a win and a very big one too Bettypooh

I chose "No-Other" because there is always something which could be better with everything if you look deeply enough at it for a long enough time. Still, I'm extremely happy with my diapers of choice and there is almost nothing I'd want to see done any differently. Bettypooh

I'm concerned with everything to some degree, for I see an ever-worsening world around me with damn little improving and I don't like that. But I don't expect to live much longer so none of it is a particular bother. I'm going to do what I'm going to do in whatever time I have left and the world be damned if it doesn't like that. It's all someone else's problem and they will have to live with how they deal with it all which will likely be poorly done. Bettypooh

This is actually a very tough question for me. My earliest memories include many daydreams of me being in diapers although I have no actual memories of wearing them. I do have one 'snapshot' memory of me standing in the living room wearing training pants, but I'm not sure how old I was. I had bladder control problems in my youth but was not allowed any form of protection. I suffered greatly from being known as a sometimes-pantswetter which only began to improve in my early teens. At these earliest ages it's hard to say I had a grasp of what 'loving' something was, and even at 11 that kind of held true still. I was a frequent bedwetter in my mid-teens which didn't end till my early 20's. Somewhere in my 20's I began to discover that there was more to my wanting to wear diapers than for practical reasons but I didn't dwell or act on that until much later in life. In between those times I made several home-made diapers for wearing when I was going to bed drunk knowing I'd wet asleep in the night, but they performed poorly and with my drugged state of mind I can't say there was anything more than practicality involved. It was in my early 40's that my desires overcame my inhibitions and I bought a bag of baby diapers, then taping 3 together made one which I could wear. There was something sexual about that back then, so really it was the second of those that showed me there was something deeper involved, more than sexual release- maybe then I discovered that I loved wearing diapers, but I became certain of it before that bag ran out. Sometime further on I bought my first bag of Depends, and then I knew it was forever although I had no idea that it would become a24/7 thing in my life. Now, many years later still, I can look back and understand that for me I should have always been in diapers. My potty-training should have never went past control of my bowels because that was all I was capable of achieving without doing great harm to myself mentally and emotionally. So knowing this to be true it's entirely possible I've always loved being in diapers, only not knowing it. Now that you know my story, you pick the point where my "love of being diapered" began- that doesn't matter to me. All that matters to me is that I'm now living my dream, it's right for me, and I will never stop wearing diapers. This part of me is now whole and complete as it always should have been but wasn't. That's enough for me Bettypooh

They're one of my 'second line' choices as the fit isn't quite what I like, but they are most excellent in every other way. I wouldn't feel much lost if they were all I could get They do swell immensely between the legs if you happen to like that sensation, and may be the best for that particular quality. Bettypooh

Nothing wrong with wearing cheap diapers as long as you understand that they aren't going to perform well when used for waste retention, especially over longer periods of time. Sometimes I like to spend a day around home and nearby in cheap diapers just to see how many times I can need a change. I don't actually count them, but I've changed only after some leakage at least ten times in 8 hours once, and I really enjoyed that but normally I prefer the opposite. If you're happy and nobody is getting hurt, then go go for whatever you like Bettypooh

The question of a 'contract' isn't necessary as long as all parties involved can stop the roleplay at any time to discuss unseen issues (like using a "safe word"). Plan the occasion beforehand then have a planned time afterward to discuss things liked and not liked which occurred. Realistically, babies have no power over mommie's decisions but they do have ways of expressing displeasure without having to resort to use of "safe words". Mommies should see those expressions and alter their expectations to prevent the need to call a stop to whatever is happening to resolve conflicts. However it's your fantasy, so set it up however you like- just be sure everyone involved has a way to stop things if that becomes necessary. I personally don't like the idea of a written contract within inter-personal relationships beyond a short list of the hard limits and an agreement on problem resolution methods. Even that isn't really necessary when the people involved truly care about each other, as they will not want anyone getting hurt in what should be an enjoyable experience for all. Life is full of unforeseen issues- how you handle them is what makes the difference between good and bad experiences. Bettypooh

I think "moving forward slowly" is the best approach. And I'd include the friend at least superficially for now, partly to affirm her feelings and partly to allow for more future possibilities. But yes, do set limits- perhaps set up a "safe word"- so that those limits can be moved to whatever everyone is comfortable with at the moment. Explore yourselves deeply but safely and enjoy the special happiness that can bring. Bettypooh

I've always recommended being at least slightly wet before going to bed as a way to remove a potential subconscious 'roadblock' to bedwetting. There's no point in trying to remain dry when you're already wet, and it reinforces that you can sleep like that. I feel that this approach, along with some WMM files listened to as I went to sleep, were what allowed me the little progress I made with bedwetting before I decided to cease making the effort and let fate choose for me. I'm most certain that I can achieve bedwetting now, many years after then, and I'm still considering doing that. I'm always wet every morning anyway, just that I wake some to pee. It's still a "maybe" for me. Bettypooh

Please don't take this the wrong way, but discovering what a real friend is is part of maturing. We all still have some basic life lessons to learn till we're 30-35, and of real friends you'll never have more than the fingers on one hand. Maybe half that. There's a place in life for the rest, but when it comes to real friends they will never let you down, reveal any secrets, or use you mercilessly. I've got exactly 2 real friends and 2 that are kind of close to that. I just recently discovered that another one in that last category was BS, quite a let-down but I just go on with life. They will need me again someday and then they will discover what they lost. Something younger folks don't understand is that while you might meet a friend on the internet, none of the people you meet only in the distance is really a friend. They can't come over and give you a hand with doing something, they can't show up and pay bond to get your butt out of jail, they can't give you a hug when you need one. Nice folks, but not real friends in your real life no matter how often you connect or how much you share. Real friends are physical, not digital, and they have no limits with you. Plus the reverse. You're at a crossroads in life and not making progress- that's why you're feeling down right now. I don't know the cause but I well know the symptoms. First thing I'd recommend is getting out into more of the world- the real world, not the internet, and get some new personal interactions going on. Explore a hobby more, look into things you've never tried but always wanted to, try something new just for the heck of it. We're made to grow and have progress in life- when that stops we begin to die, and you're not old enough for that yet. Needing human interaction is how we're built and that's become more shallow these days what with everyone's life being more digital than physical. Social media has changed the world, and not all of that change is good. So now it's time to move forward into something more real- that will rejuvenate your spirits and get you going again. Put on a smile and head out the door even if only to see what's going on around you today. Find something to like about it- the leaves changing color, how pretty snow on the ground is, seeing how many people smile back at you, or whatever. We need life, not just survival, and it doesn't often come to us- we have to go out and grab some of it ourselves, so go grab some! Bettypooh

I say not to let "labels" bother you, restrict you, or define you. We are who we are, even if that changes from moment to moment. What matters is how we deal with ourselves, whether allowing it, restricting it, or exposing it as well as any variations regards the setting we're in. Being strongly gender-fluid is a PITA but what can you do when that's who you are? My choice is to work with how much the rest of the world sees to keep myself on an even keel. Here at home I just go with it, but for now I display as a male and usually act accordingly. It''s not who I really am by a long shot, only how I handle it. Those who know me really well have seen all sides of me. It's just my solution- yours may be different. Bettypooh

Good luck with the surgery and for a fast recovery Bettypooh

I sewed my own from Birdseye squares that I got from an Ebay seller named "Granitesmith". Had to wait for 'sales' pricing though, normal prices were more than I could afford. Haven't seen anything cheaper for real cloth diapers, and I don't know if that seller is still around. Fabric stores might have good deals, never tried that. Bettypooh

I'd say ride it out for now. Paying any attention to your bladder's condition or habits might induce a return to previous (and in this case unwanted) behavior. Of course we do notice things, that can't be controlled well, but leave the thoughts at that point and refuse to think further on it. I find that easiest by distracting myself with doing something else totally unrelated to diapers. Same as with everything else in life, the more you worry about it the worse it gets, so don't worry- pee happy As long as it goes into a diaper there ain't nothing to worry about My own peeing habits still vary at times too, but I don't care. I'm going to be diapered and deal with it accordingly, and that's where my happiness is Bettypooh

Re-potty training is a sometimes thing, unpredictable and with no way of knowing which way will be you. This is why we are so adamant about being positive that you want incontinence before you begin this journey because it might be a one-way trip with no return. And that can leave you prone to depression and other things which can essentially ruin any chance of happiness for the rest of your life if you can't handle it well. Bettypooh

Being a big coffee drinker my urine smell is rather strong. What I've found that works well to reduce the retained odor is to fully rinse the diaper in cold water immediately on removing it. Almost as good is rinsing in the shower or having a water-filled diaper pail, preferably with some bakiing soda added. With the latter you'll want to leave them no longer than 48 hours before laundering. Bettypooh

Most people can slow down or otherwise limit their wearing substantially, but few if any can totally quit the game. That point can be something you will need to know should matters reach the point where you wish to attempt it. And as often as not, the passing of time increases the desire or need to wear unless you have already reached a point of total satisfaction with it. This is something very deep and very strong in us. It's not within our total control, and attempting to limit it below our individual need usually results in it overwhelming us. Always be prepared for any eventualities for they may happen. Bettypooh

Park in back. Park down the street. Park in front of a more 'tame' business. Invent a good reason to be parked there. Grab an Uber ride. Always have enough "CYA" prepared before you do anything out of the mainstream or anything you want to remain hidden. That applies everywhere, not just here. Spontaneous responding on touchy subjects rarely does anything good for you Bettypooh

No problem. I do "play" with pooping my diapers once every couple years but so far it's still not appealing to me. To each their own Bettypooh

I think you may have me confused for someone else. I'd rather not have that. Bettypooh

This closely parallels my own experiences. It takes time to become consciously aware of your internal sphincter as you normally cannot feel it. Once you make that connection you can further learn how to mentally manipulate it, placing it at least partially into the consciously controllable realm instead of unconscious control only which is the natural state. I actually learned the process from the meditative side of martial arts training. Approached correctly, you can control every aspect of any body function but the more deeply the function is connected to survival, the harder it is to achieve. After years of working on this, my internal sphincter defaults to being open most of the time while I'm awake. It is now a habit, and not a process I have to pay any attention to like I did for the early part of my journey. It's not an always thing, and sometimes I just cannot get my internal sphincter's full cooperation which is rather frustrating. What I find works best at those times is to forget about it by focusing fully on something else, and then it give up it's rebellion faster. Thinking about it seems to just make it last longer. I can also get it to close at will given enough concentration on that, but with it's ability being weakened through atrophy from years of disuse whatever control I can achieve is both uncertain and short-lived. My external sphincter is in a similar state. I am now truly incontinent in that I cannot stop my wetting, and that is what I wanted. Bettypooh

It does tend to be genetic in nature, but as with all genetics there can be significant exceptions to the trends. Of my family, I'm the sole example of abnormal continence which occurred naturally save for one nephew's son who was around 9 before he became reliably dry. His other 3 kids have developed normally. Bettypooh