Interesting topic & I agree whole-heartedly about holding grudges especially over petty stuff i.e. what your brother holds onto DailyDi. Some people may say that I hold grudges against my "parents", although these grudges are not over petty stuff that has no effect or bearing on my life now, because they very much do. For me, the stuff I struggle to let go of even after years in therapy, are very big. I try not to dwell on the past which I can no longer change or control, yet when the past still affects you physically, emotionally & mentally even to this day, how are you supposed to let go of it? I have asked the multiple therapists that I have worked with this question & so far I haven't gotten pointed in a particular direction yet. *Sigh*