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Daniel is a young man kept in permanent babyhood. When a chance discovery reveals the truth of the world and his position in it he is determined to "grow up". The question is whether his adopted mother and sister are ready to let him... --- Writing is my passion and my only source of income. If you enjoy my stories you may be interested to learn that you can see every update I post one week before the rest of the world with a $5 pledge on Patreon. For $10 you can see everything early AND 50 full length stories that can only be found on my SubscribeStar and Ream pages! The money I get goes to paying bills and putting food on the table so I appreciate all of my patrons and would appreciate anyone who might be interested in supporting me to check out my Patreon ❤️ https://reamstories.com/elfy https://subscribestar.adult/elfy --- Training Daniel By Elfy Daniel rolled over and let out a little grunt as he stretched his legs. He could feel the diaper between his legs pushing his thighs apart, the padding was swollen from another night in his ever-present crib. Beneath him, underneath the soft cotton, a plastic sheet crackled as he moved. It was the usual noises of his nursery in the morning. “Wakey wakey, sleepyhead.” That was another familiar sound in Daniel’s nursery. It was his Mommy, Sarah. She was usually the one to wake him up in the morning which was fine with Daniel, it was preferable to his mean sister, Amber. They weren’t his real Mommy and sister, of course. Daniel’s real parents had been killed when he had been very young and it was Sarah, a friend of his biological mother who had taken him in. It had all happened when he was very little so he didn’t have any memories of his parents and his Mommy was never keen on discussing his family. Daniel slowly opened his eyes. The curtains had been opened and he was left blinking in the early morning sunlight as he adjusted to the world. The familiar white bars of his crib towered over him on all sides, above him a mobile which featured various farmyard animals wearing capes like superheroes. Beyond Daniel’s crib was his nursery. Something that hadn’t changed in his twenty years of life. It was primarily baby blue and white. His crib was on the opposite side of the room to the door, behind his head the long changing table stretched out underneath the window. On the opposite side of the room next to the door was his toys. A big chest filled with all the toys that he had accumulated, above that was the shelves filled with books for bed time. By the foot of the crib was the chest of drawers and closet filled with his clothes. “Did you have a good night?” Sarah asked as she stood on the release and lowered the side of the crib. Daniel nodded his head as he rubbed his sleepy eyes. He felt his mother leaning into the crib and instinctively spread his legs for the morning diaper check. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that he was wet. He wet in his sleep every night, it was no big deal. There was something different about today though. Normally Daniel’s diaper checks involved a quick poke and a prod but today his mom’s hand lingered. As he finished rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he looked down at his crotch. His mom’s large hand was massaging the front of the diaper, the wet padding rubbing against his skin. “Mommy?” Daniel asked in a little voice. “That’s right, baby.” Sarah smiled warmly as her hand continued to dance against the padding, “It’s your milking day.” Daniel felt his heart leap a little. He had never been taught things like the days of the week, he never really knew what the date was or even what month fell in what season, he had only really learnt a little about the time of day from watching clocks. No one had taught him things like that, things men didn’t need to know. So Daniel never really knew when his scheduled milking days were, he had to just wait until they happened. The rubbing continued until Daniel let out a little moan and then it stopped abruptly. He sighed, it was always the way. His Mommy and sister liked teasing him at the best of times but it went into overdrive when it was time for his milking. It was as frustrating as it was exciting. They had started around the time he was eighteen and continued seemingly at random ever since. It was one reason he was kind of glad he didn’t live with his actual family because it would make all this a lot weirder! A lot of that frustration was down to the “toy” that was kept almost permanently locked on to Daniel’s private parts. A rubber chastity device wrapped around his penis like a cocoon. It was flexible enough but it prevented him from getting too excited, it meant that whenever he was teased in that area he could only feel a small amount of the sensation. The clear rubber was designed to only encase his dick though, the balls underneath were left uncovered and it was that area that the two women always seemed to focus on when teasing him. By the time Sarah had finished rubbing the front of the wet diaper Daniel was feeling a lot of frustration. His poor little penis strained against its rubber prison without being able to break out. The side of the crib came rattling down and Daniel held his arms out to be picked up by his Mommy. Daniel was clutched tightly to Sarah’s chest as he was taken across to his changing table. It was a little awkward with Sarah’s large chest meaning Daniel couldn’t lay flat against his Mommy. He wrapped his legs around her middle and his arms around her neck. With a grunt of effort Sarah lifted Daniel and sat him on the edge of table. He scooted back and laid down for his inevitable diaper change. He looked out of the window as the tapes were pulled away from the shiny front landing panel. The diaper slackened in stages until the last tape came free and the padding slid down a little. Sarah then opened the diaper up to the cool air of the nursery. Daniel had gone through more diaper changes than he could count. Not that he could count particularly highly, he always started having trouble when it got to double digits and he ran out of fingers to use. Usually the next stage would be the baby wipes but today was milking day and that meant there was a slight change of plans. With a gasp Daniel felt his Mommy gently rubbing the skin of his ball sack. He was always kept completely shaved down there for hygiene reasons and his skin was baby smooth. He closed his eyes as felt his Mommy’s fingers, they were so delicate at times it was hard to feel that they were there at all but the electric excitement was always present. “Do you like that?” Sarah asked happily. Daniel nodded his head. It was embarrassing but he couldn’t deny how it made him feel. Perhaps it was because his milking days often seemed so distant to one another but every time someone touched him between his legs it felt incredible. It was no wonder men were kept in diapers, they had to keep this whole area locked away in case someone brushed past them by accident. For several minutes Daniel was left writhing on his changing table as he was fondled by his Mommy. He wondered if other men had such strict milking days like he did, maybe he was one of the lucky ones and some people didn’t get milkings at all. That would be a disaster, it was one of the things Daniel looked forwards to most. “We better get you all padded up before we have an accident on our hands.” Sarah said when she finally pulled her hand away from Daniel’s crotch. Daniel sighed. He almost felt like he could feel his balls throbbing after all the attention, he ached for more but he knew from past experience that he could only expect further teasing until the prison around his penis came off. A fresh diaper was pulled off the small shelf below the padded top. Daniel heard it crinkling as it opened and as his legs were lifted up like they weighed nothing he turned to look out the window. There were a lot of downsides to men being inherently weaker than women but they certainly made diaper changes easier. When Daniel’s hips were lowered it was on to the open padding. The familiar feeling of a thick diaper wrapped up between his legs and over his caged genitals. Sarah flattened out the plastic over Daniel’s tummy and then taped it closed. The routine continued as Daniel lifted his arms again, he was picked up and sat on the edge of the table. With one hand on his chest to stop him from falling Sarah turned to some clothes that she had prepared from the previous night that were hanging over the back of the rocking chair in the corner. “A special outfit for a special day.” Sarah said. Daniel didn’t recognise the clothing. It must’ve been new. Whilst a lot of clothing was store bought a lot of his clothing was also made by his Mommy at home, she’d grown quite good at it but this was clearly one of her creations. Firstly a t-shirt was pulled over Daniel’s head. It was plain white and not particularly notable but the shortalls that came with them were very much created at home. They had once been plain but Sarah had been doing some embroidery. Now the large chest piece, rather than being blank was stitched with the words “Baby’s Milking Day!” “Isn’t it wonderful?” Sarah said effusively as she slipped Daniel’s legs into the correct holes and put him in the infantile clothing. “Yes Mommy.” Daniel said with a smile, “Thank you.” Daniel saw his Mommy leaning down to him and he instinctively lifted his arms. He was picked up under the arms and sat on his Mommy’s hip. He yawned and rubbed his eyes as he was carried downstairs, his legs dangled uselessly as the pair of them descended the steps. With everything in the house designed for the much taller females Daniel had always seen being carried around as a lucky privilege. Trying to climb up or down these stairs would be like trying to scale a mountain. The living room was already occupied when Daniel was carried in. Amber was sat on the couch. She was a couple of years older than Daniel but the differences between them made it seem much larger. She was seven feet tall and had inherited her mother’s large breasts. She was pretty but mean, especially towards Daniel, and seemed to take great pleasure in embarrassing him whenever she got the chance. She always seemed to go even harder on milking days. “You play in your pen alright?” Sarah said as she placed Daniel into the fenced area. She walked over and turned on the television. Bright cartoons starting dancing across the screen, “I’m going to get breakfast ready.” “Yes Mommy.” Daniel replied. As Daniel settled into place in the pen he reflected on life and the society that he really didn’t see a lot of. He was small, even for a male, at five-feet tall he was towered over by his Mommy and “sister.” Women were always taller than men but in this family it seemed to run to extremes, the women were taller than average and the men were shorter. Amber was seven-feet tall and Daniel’s Mommy was eight-feet. The difference in height was only made starker because Daniel was always on the floor. He was too weak to walk and he was kept that way on purpose. He very occasionally saw men walking on television but his Mommy assured him that was the exception rather than the norm. Most men were kept weak and were treated like babies. They also seemed to be kept at home a lot, Daniel had rarely been allowed to explore beyond the backyard. Whilst Amber went to school throughout her childhood Daniel was kept at home, beyond the absolute basics like speech Daniel was kept ignorant. Daniel didn’t like the way things were if he was honest. He always felt so jealous of Amber whenever she went out with friends or to work. His days consisted of sitting around in his diapers, playing and watching cartoons. A monotonous life that was occasionally broken up by special events such as… “Milking day, huh?” Amber said with a sneer, “Lucky boy.” Daniel blushed a little and looked down at the floor. He always felt embarrassed when people brought up his “milkings” even if he looked forward to them a lot. He especially didn’t like when Amber brought it up. Amber stood up and walked around to the playpen’s gate. She helped herself inside and Daniel tried his best to ignore her presence. She walked around until she stood in front of him and put her hands on her hips. Daniel looked at some of his toys on the floor and tried not to let his sister know how he was so intimidated. It didn’t work. Just as Daniel was starting to wonder what was going to happen he felt Amber’s foot against the front of his shortalls. The foot rested on the bulging front of his diaper and he immediately winced, it didn’t hurt because Amber wasn’t putting any pressure behind it but that didn’t stop the clear threat. “It’s a good thing we keep this locked up.” Amber stated as she prodded down with her foot a couple of times, “I bet it would be going off everywhere if we didn’t.” Daniel didn’t think that was fair but all he could do was scoot backwards on his padded rear to get away from the foot. He turned away from his sister with red cheeks and looked over to a simple jigsaw puzzle. He pulled it over, anything to get away from Amber’s mocking. He couldn’t go far, of course, the bars of the playpen made sure of that. “I think I’ll go out for a walk today.” Amber said airily. She made it sound like an idle thought but Daniel knew it was aimed at him, “Maybe meet some friends and go see a movie. Ooh, I hear Damage Limitation are in town, maybe I could score some tickets…” Daniel ducked his head. One of Amber’s favourite games was taunting him by talking about what she could do and what he could not. All he could do was pout and hope his sister got bored soon. When Amber suddenly stepped up to him and reached over his shoulder he was surprised, he nearly fell over as her hand went down to his diaper and squeezed the front. “Or maybe I should stay in after all.” Amber said with a small giggle, “It is your special day after all. Who knows when the next one will be?” Daniel tried to suppress a small moan as he felt Amber’s hand rub against him. The rubber toy encasing his sensitive parts did a good job of stopping most of the sensations getting through but he could still feel the pressure. His balls in particular enjoyed rubbing against the soft and smooth padding of the inner diaper. “Ugh…” A small moan escaped Daniel’s mouth. His little man was trying to stand at attention but the toy made it difficult. It wasn’t painful but it was uncomfortable. “Breakfast is ready.” Sarah called out from the kitchen. Amber withdrew her hand. She laughed as Daniel reached out his hands to be picked up, it would be a lot better than having to crawl all the way out to the dining table. He was disappointed as Amber shook her head and walked away. Daniel scowled after her. He had no option but to get on his hands and knees and scurry out towards the kitchen. Everything was so much bigger than Daniel already but when he crawled around like this it was more pronounced than ever before. He went down the long hallway to the kitchen where Amber was already sat at the table, she was leaning back in her chair and smirking as Daniel came in. He crawled around to his highchair and waited on the floor, there was no way he could climb up into it without help. “Upsy daisy.” Sarah said as she lifted Daniel up. --- If you've enjoyed this and want to find out what happens next you can do so RIGHT NOW on the links below! https://reamstories.com/page/lpjgftb4y2/story/luzh7bq3yj/chapter/2b197e1d-bf4e-46d5-a3c2-1e93f4a6a0fa https://subscribestar.adult/posts/1268609

Introduction What would happen if, no matter how old you are, your parents found your stash? Well, on an already miserable day, that’s exactly what happened to Tom. How will both he and his dad handle it? Chapter 1 - Rejection ‘Well, thank you for coming in today, myself and the panel will discuss the interview and the recruiter will get back to you in due course’. Tom could see in the eyes of the interviewer it was going to be another rejection. He couldn’t understand it, just over a year ago he’d graduated with a 2:1 in Architecture. He thought he’d walk into a job, but he’d applied to every company he could find, and had 15 interviews never getting further than the second round. He couldn’t understand it, what was he doing wrong? Whatever it was it wasn’t how he presented himself. He looked gorgeous in his grey slim fit suit and smart tan shoes. He is 5’9, short jet black hair, with beautiful bright blue eyes, but I guess it’s what you say in interview which is important, not how you look. He stood up, grabbed his posh leather bag his dad had gotten him for his graduation, shook the panel’s hands and made his way out into the busy London street. No sooner had he stepped out the building a rough looking man bumped into him with a cigarette burning a hole right into the shoulder. ‘Hey!’ said Tom. ‘Fuck off, prick’ cursed the man as he hurried on. It was the final straw, a tear rolled down Tom’s face. He couldn’t take much more of life at this point. Everything was falling apart, or that’s how it felt. 23, no job, no friends who are local, his mum has passed away and he’s still living with his grieving dad Steve. After travelling back by train Tom let himself into the house and rushed straight upstairs to his room. ‘How’d the interview go?’ called his Dad from his study. ‘Crap’ shouted back Tom. Once in the room he started to undress. He hung up his suit jacket and inspected the burn. Maybe it could be repaired? Probably not, now he doesn’t even have a suit if he gets another interview. Nevertheless he took off the trousers and placed the suit in its special bag like always, before putting it in the wardrobe. He grabbed his joggers and a t-shirt and turned to lay on his bed, but as he did, he saw something which made his blood run cold. Could this day get any worse? His worst nightmare was lying in front of him. His heart thumped in his chest as if it was about to exit it. His face flushed red, sweat started to bead on his forehead, panic started to set in. Lying there in front of him was one of his adult nappies, and on it a note. “Hey son, let’s talk, love Dad”. Tom had bought these nappies a few months back from a medical supply company whilst his Dad had been away for work. He’d been interested in them for a while. He’d enjoyed the few he’d tried but he’d not had the courage to wear them once his dad got back. He’d hidden them under his bed in a carrier bag, but clearly his dad had found them. He couldn’t believe it, how could this happen? For an hour he sat there thinking of excuses he could make, plausible stories he could tell. “They’re not mine”. “I’ve been having bedwetting problems”, “I…” none of them seemed convincing. He didn’t feel like he could leave the room. After at least an hour and a half his dad called ‘dinner!’ Heart thumping and head racing he made his way down the stairs. He was physically shaking. When he saw his Dad at the table, he froze. ‘So you don’t think they’ll ask you back?’ asked his Dad. ‘No’ Tom tried to say, but nothing came out. ‘No’ he said eventually in his third attempt. ‘Sit down it’s getting cold’ said his Dad gesturing to Toms dinner. Tom made his way over and sat down in silence. For a short while they both ate, but Tom really wasn’t hungry, if anything he felt sick. He just shuffled his food around. When his dad had finished he reached out and put his had on Tom’s. ‘Talk to me Tom’ he said gently, trying to make eye contact. Tom was physically shaking, he couldn’t speak, he was living his worst nightmare. His Dad lent across to him. ‘I found your nappies mate’ he said. Just hearing that out loud drove through Tom like a train. ‘They’re not mine’ he blurted out. It was like a reflex, he heard himself say it, but he didn’t think he’d actually processed what he was going to say yet. His dad gave him a soft smile. ‘I know they’re yours son’. He said softly. ‘Tell me why’ he asked. Tom put his shaking hands over his eyes, tears now starting to well up. ‘Please talk to me son’. ‘I’m sorry Dad, I’m such a failure. I’ve got no friends, I don’t have any hobbies, I can’t get a job, I’m going nowhere. I’m a disappointment. If mum were alive she’d be heartbroken at what a useless adult I’ve become’. ‘Oh don’t be silly’ said his Dad. ‘You’re going through a tough time, I know, we both are, but you have your whole life ahead of you. You’re only 23’ Tom couldn’t look at his Dad, he still had his hands over his eyes. ‘I just wish things were like years ago, when mum was alive, when I was carefree and….happy’ sobbed Tom. ‘Is that why you bought the nappies?’ His dad asked gently. ‘I dunno, I dunno why I bought them’ said Tom regretfully. ‘Do they take you back, to a happy place? Are they a stress reliever for you or something?’ His dad enquired. ‘I guess so, I’m sorry, I’ll throw them away, please don’t think I’m a weirdo or a sicko dad, please’ said Tom. ‘I don’t, I understand, if they relax you and you want to wear them that’s fine. I wore them myself for a bit when I was your age’. Tom immediately pulled his face out of his hands. That was an unexpected sentence. ‘What?’ Said Tom in shock. ‘I wore nappies as a stress reliever, to regress for a few years, never did me any harm, better than drugs or booze’. Said his dad dismissively. Tom didn’t know what to say, he just stared at his dad in shock, and in a strange sense, relief. His dad got up and gestured to Tom to get up and give him a hug. Tom obliged, got up and put his arms around his Dad. ‘You’re still shaking’ he said. ‘This might be the perfect time for one of those nappies’. Chapter 2 - Relief When Tom went back into his room the nappy was still there laying on the bed. Half of him desperately wanted to put it on the other half wanted to throw it out the window. Eventually the half that wanted to wear it won out and he started to unfurl it. After he’d just had permission to hadn’t he? He slowly pulled down his joggers, pulled down his boxers and sat himself on the nappy. He laid back for a moment and stared at the ceiling. “What am I doing?” He repeated to himself, but his desire to carry on pushed through and he slowly and carefully applied the 4 tapes of his Tena Maxi adult nappy. He slowly closed his legs. The nappy popped and crinkled as it resisted. The feeling was amazing, he could feel the stress of this bizarre day drain away. After a while his dad called up. ‘You can come down you know, I want to watch Traitors’. Tom and his Dad had been watching it on catchup together each evening. Tom stood up, his nappy crinkling, not overly loudly, but noticeably in a quiet room. He pulled the joggers over it and looked in the mirror. It wasn’t noticeable from the front. He made his way down and quickly sat in the chair, so his dad couldn’t notice or tell. Tom was hugely into the Traitors on TV, but his mind was elsewhere tonight. As his dad commented on it, he just managed the occasional “yeah” instead of the usual debate. Eventually it finished and his dad switched off the TV. He looked across at Tom expectantly. ‘So did you put one on?’ He asked. Tom paused for a moment. ‘Yeah’ he said shyly. ‘Feel better now?’ asked his Dad. Tom breathed out slowly. ‘Yeah, I guess I do’. He said eventually. ‘Good’ said his dad. If that’s all it takes to relax you, just wear them son, I won’t judge. ‘Can I ask a practical question though?’ ‘What?’ asked Tom uncertain. ‘Do you, wet yourself?’ His dad asked plainly. ‘No!’ exclaimed Tom, as if it was a ridiculous question. He’d worn three on his own, and it had not remotely occurred to him to wet them. It was just the feeling of the bulk he liked. He wasn’t about to start wetting himself! ‘I mean, it’s not a crazy thing to ask Tom’ his Dad said. ‘You’re wearing a nappy and I ask if you wet yourself’. There was an awkward pause. ‘Well, if you do have an accident, I’ll put some bin bags in your room. Take it off, ball it up, put it in the bag, tie it up and put it outside your door, I’ll get rid of it. Don’t put it in the bins in the house, they can smell after a bit’. ‘Oh for god sake dad, I don’t wet myself!’ Repeated Tom as he got up to leave the room. ‘Hey’ called his dad grabbing his arm. ‘Don’t walk off on me, I’m being understanding and supportive. ‘It was a perfectly reasonable question and I wanted to make sure we have a plan for it’. ‘I know, sorry Dad, it’s just weird that’s all’ said Tom genuinely. ‘I guess I’m just embarrassed, y’know’. ‘Yeah I get that son, wearing a nappy is embarrassing, but it’s nothing to be ashamed of, people wear them for all sorts of reasons. As long as they’re helping you, it’s all good, I’m proud of you for talking to me about it at all and doing what makes you happy. I don’t think I could have handled it so well with my dad if he ever found mine’. Tom thought to ask his Dad if he ever wet his nappies, but it just felt too weird. Chapter 3 - The bathroom problem Tom stood in the bathroom cleaning his teeth, then habitually turned to the toilet to do a wee before getting into bed. As he went to grab it his hand slammed into his pad, not his boxers, opps. He reached inside and tried to pull it out the top, but he’s not that well endowed and it wouldn’t reach well enough even with the nappy pulled right down, he’d just pee all over himself. He tucked himself back down, squatted and reached into a leg guard. The guard was tight, but he managed to get the head out and point it to the toilet. He tried to go, but the pressure of the leg guard was stopping the flow. He squatted even more, and eventually wee squirted out, some in the loo, some up the wall and some in the bath. It was very awkward, and it had made a huge mess, but eventually he was done. He hurriedly started to clean up bathroom. Once in his room, he dropped his joggers, took off his t-shirt and looked at himself in the mirror. Like before, half of him thought he looked good with the nappy on, the other half thought he looked like a freak. For a moment he planned to take it off, but ultimately decided against it, he didn’t have many, he didn’t have any money and he didn’t want to waste it. He pulled on his pjs over the top of it. It took a while before he fell asleep, the feel of the nappy seemed somewhat overwhelming. It was keeping him awake, but eventually he did drop of. … He looked over at the clock with one eye, 3:10am. He woke up for a wee at this time every night. For a split second he thought about going in his nappy, but it was just a second. He made his way to the bathroom, where exactly the same thing happened as earlier, except worse, because this time he was half asleep. Like before he hurriedly cleaned up, to what he thought was a good standard, and made his way back to bed. … The following morning, he woke as usual and made his way downstairs. ‘Jam on toast?’ asked his Dad? ‘Yes please’ said Tom still a little sleepy. As his Dad made breakfast, he turned to Tom. ‘Ok, here’s something I gotta say’. He said. ‘If you’re going to wear those nappies in my house, I’d much rather you wee in it and cleanly dispose of it, than wee all over the bathroom’ he said waving the butter knife. ‘Sorry, I thought I cleared up’ said Tom in a bit of a panic. ‘I just need some practice, sorry’. ‘Tom’s’ dad turned around. ‘If you want to wear, but still use the loo. I’ll get you some pull-ups, but if you’re in those it’s just not really practical, unless you remove it, which of course pretty much ruins it. Tom thought again about asking his dad if he’d wet his, but like before it just felt odd and creepy to ask his dad that. ‘I’ll try sitting next time’ said Tom. Chapter 4 - A Subscription! It may surprise you to know that after his shower that day Tom put on regular underpants. He’d had his fill, in fact for the next 2 days, no more nappy and it was only mentioned a couple of times by his dad, gently enquiring whether he was wearing one or not. That doesn’t mean Tom hadn’t thought about what had happened virtually every waking minute. It was just that after the initial rush it just felt too awkward to go about his normal daily routine at home, in front of his dad, with a nappy on. That initial confidence had been lost. Tom was at his computer at about 11am, his Dad was in his study downstairs working. He’s a self employed accountant, he works from home most days, only occasionally going into the city to meet a client. There was a knock at the door. “Sign here please mate” Tom heard the delivery driver say, before several thud sounds. Tom made his way down curiously. In the hall his Dad was positioning 3 large boxes. ‘What you ordered?’ asked Tom. His dad stepped back with a big proud grin. ‘Open one’ he said. Tom stepped forward and pulled the tape off of the box on top and flapped it open. ‘Nappies!?!’ He said in shock. ‘Why have you ordered nappies?’ Tom said with a look of confusion on his face. ‘Because you told me you like to wear them, so I’ve ordered you them for you.’ Tom looked at the huge pile. 21 per pack, 3 in a box, 3 boxes. 189 nappies! ‘Well how many are you expecting me to get through?’ He asked incredulously. ‘I don’t know, but you save on delivery if you spend over £80 and get 10% off if you sign up for a subscription, so I got 3 cases’. ‘A subscription!’ Tom said almost shouting. ‘It’s ok, I can cancel it, there’s no commitment’ said his dad waving it off. ‘Look they’re there if you want one. You feel stressed, or just want one they are there. Take a pack up to your room, I’ll store the rest in the spare room’. Tom walked up to his room carrying his bag of nappies. He couldn’t decide what he thought about it. It had been great that his dad hadn’t freaked out, it had been a huge relief his dad was so supportive, but buying him 3 cases without asking? As Tom looked at the nappies in the pack on his bed next to him, he had an odd feeling. He wanted to put one on of course, but he also now felt this uncomfortable expectation from his that he would, and that if he didn’t his dad be oddly disappointed that he’d wasted his money. He put the pack to one side and made his way downstairs. He tapped on his dad’s study door. ‘I’ve got to ask dad, why have you ordered me three cases of nappies without asking me if I want them?’ His dad turned around on his office chair and took off his reading glasses. ‘Because son, if I’d have asked if you wanted me to order them you’d have said no, and I know you want them deep down. You can’t afford them, and you’d not order when I’m here even if you could, so I just ordered them for you. Save you the anxiety. You’re under no obligation, they’re there if you want them’. Chapter 5 - No obligation Tom’s days were not as full as they could be. He’d get up, have breakfast and then go on the job hunting sites. If there was anything to apply for, he’d apply for it. Generally though he was done by lunchtime and scratching around for something to do. Today was one of those days, he’d applied for one job, he didn’t really like the sound of it, but it was that or apply for nothing. He went over to the pack of nappies that had just arrived and pealed them open. They were the same make as the ones he’d bought, but these were the highest absorbency ‘Ultima’ version. He pulled one out, and held it. Just holding it in his hand gave him a buzz. He un furled it and felt the contrast been the smooth plastic outer shell and soft padded inside. It gave him a magical, warm and excited feeling inside. He slowly pulled down his jeans, then his boxers and laid himself on the bed. Slowly and carefully he pulled the nappy up snuggly between his legs and securely taped it on. Instantly the day went from empty and dull to a whirlwind of emotion. He no longer felt bored, he felt excited. The nappy, that his own dad had bought him no less, sat comfortably and reassuringly between his legs. He reached down and felt it. The bulk was considerable, his man parts locked away beneath the thick padding. He laid on his bed in just his t-shirt and nappy, just enjoying the moment for a while, before lifting himself up from his dreamlike state to stand. The nappy pushed between his legs. As his walked over to his mirror he could feel its presence with every step. He looked at himself in the mirror. He liked what he saw, he thought it looked both cute and smart all at the same time. … “Knock-knock” ‘Hi son I’m done, fancy a walk?’ Called his dad through the door. Tom dived to the floor to grab his jeans and then tried to pull them on in a panic. As he did, his door started to open. Before long he was standing there in front of his dad, trousers half up in a t-shirt and nappy. ‘Ah, you tried one’ said his dad. ‘Like em?’ ‘Err yeah’ said Tom. ‘A bit thicker’ ‘Yeah, I thought well, if you do wet yourself, these will last you a bit longer’. Replied his dad. Tom didn’t know how to reply to that. His instinct was to say ‘I don’t wet myself’ like before, but in truth he was thinking about giving it a go, given how difficult it was to use the loo. ‘I can’t go for a walk in this’ said Tom, pointing to his nappy. ‘Why?’ asked his dad. ‘Err, why do you think?’ Replied Tom. ‘No, genuinely Tom I don’t know why’ his dad replied. ‘Tell me’ ‘People will notice!!’ said Tom. ‘Who’s going to notice?’ said his dad incredulously. ‘You can’t tell it’s there under clothes’ he said confused. ‘It’s a private thing, no one knows what underwear you’ve got on, get over yourself’. Tom finished buttoning up his jeans. They were actually a little tight with his Tena Ultima nappy underneath. ‘I’m going to take it off’ he said as he started unbuttoning again. ‘Right’ said his dad authoritatively. ‘I’m supportive, but to a point. I won’t have piss all over the bathroom and I’m not having you waste nappies by putting them on, then just taking them off again moments later. They’re expensive. Do up your bloody trousers and stop being silly’ Tom didn’t really know what to say. He stopped unbuttoning. ‘Does it really not show?’ ‘No son, it doesn’t’. Now come on it’s a nice day, let’s get some fresh air. … As Tom walked along the bulk of the nappy was present with every step. Both he and his dad were fast walkers, but in his nappy and tight jeans he was struggling to keep up a little. It was a beautiful day. They went to the park, had an ice cream and on the way back walked past the local pub. ‘Fancy a cheeky pint?’ Asked his dad. They often went into the pup together. ‘Yeah, why not’ said Tom. They both had a couple of pints before it was time to leave. They didn’t talk about Toms nappy at all, mostly about the Traitors on TV. ‘Ok, I’m going to pop to the loo and then we’ll head off’ said his Dad. ‘Ah yeah, me too’ said Tom. His dad stopped and looked at him. ‘You do make me laugh, why are you doing it to yourself? You can’t wee all over the floor in a public bathroom, it’s rude and disrespectful’. Tom looked at him, kinda accepting that he had a point. Whilst it felt so crazy to wet himself, as his dad became more accepting and as Tom was waddling around in the nappy anyway, it felt increasingly silly to not use it for what it was designed for. ‘The thing is son’ said his dad. ‘They deteriorate after 4-6 hours anyway, so you gotta change it whether you use it or not, you may as well use it. Tom stood and waited whilst his dad went to the loo. He was breaking his neck, but he couldn’t go. Something in his brain was telling him no. He couldn’t just wet himself right there in the middle of the pub! As they walked back, Tom was getting increasingly desperate and his dad noticed. Tom was walking quicker and quicker and couldn’t stop grabbing his crotch. His bladder felt like it was going to burst. ‘Stop walking a minute’ said his dad, stopping himself. Tom stopped, the urge unbearable. ‘If you don’t let it go you’ll hurt your kidneys. That’s what I did, it was agony for days. That’s why I’m trying to help you. Just go, you don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me’ With that Tom’s bladder burst, right there in the street. Wee poured uncontrollably into his nappy. He stared desperately at his jeans in the full expectation that wee would be pouring down them, but it was not. What he could feel though was his nappy expanding and getting larger and tighter in his jeans. After what felt like forever, he stopped. ‘Come on then’ said his said. As Tom walked on the nappy felt completely different to before. It was much much bulkier, oddly to him though it didn’t feel at all wet. It had clearly absorbed all the wee and left him dry, which was pretty amazing actually, who’d have thought they’d work so well? It felt so strange yet at the same time so comforting to have had an accident and been protected by his nappy. It also made him feel small, having just stood there in front of his dad and wet himself. As they walked along his dad turned to him and chuckled. ‘So I guess that answers my question. You do wet yourself.’ Chapter 6 - Something awkward Over the next few days Tom had worn a nappy on and off, even when wearing all but a couple of very carefully managed wees has been in the toilet, with great difficulty. He was really conflicted about whether to wear one or not. Even though his dad was fine with it, almost encouraging it, he was still embarrassed to talk about it, and felt a little silly with it on. Things had been reasonably normal. His dad had enquired occasionally as to the state of his nappy, but it wasn’t often. Just things like. “If you’re wet son, don’t forget to change regularly”. His dad had also bought him some powders and creams and impressed upon him the importance of good skin care and hygiene. “Wearing nappies isn’t dirty or gross son, but you do need to up your game on hygiene and skin care” he’d said. … As they sat and watched tv that evening, Tom decided he’d do a wee in his nappy. He stood and after a few odd movements he started to wet himself. ‘Good lad, I notice you’re getting better at that’ said his dad. Tom stood a while longer until he’d finished, then sat back down in his now wet nappy and finally said something that was increasingly bothering him. ‘Dad’ he said. ‘Can I ask you something really awkward?’ His dad switched off the tv and looked at him with suspicion. ‘Okaaay’ he said slowly, Tom took a deep breath. ‘Do you like me in nappies?’ He eventually asked. ‘What do you mean?’ asked his dad. ‘Well, like just then, and other times, you seem to be encouraging it. Like you want me to be in nappies and wet myself and stuff’ asked Tom. His dad moved his gaze away for a moment thinking about what he was going to say. Eventually he returned to Tom. ‘It’s not about me, it’s about you son. I just want you to have what I never had, an understanding parent during this part of your life. It’s obviously in our genes to like this. I’ve passed it on to you. I want it to be as easy and enjoyable as possible for you to go through. Not like my experience. I’d have loved my dad to have accepted my nappy wearing, but I never got it, and I never got to find out what he would have done or said.’ ‘I see’ said Tom. ‘Granddad never knew?’ What would you have wanted granddad to do or say?’ Asked Tom. ‘I’d have liked him to say it’s fine, I’d have liked acceptance, I’d have liked….to have…well it doesn’t matter’. ‘No do say’ said Tom. ‘Heck, we’re beyond holding back aren’t we?’ Tom’s Dad paused for a considerable time. ‘I’d have liked him to change me. BUT that doesn’t mean I’m asking to change you!’ He blurted out Tom sat there, looking at his Dad. ‘Do you want to change me then?’ He asked gingerly. ‘No, No!’ said his dad definitely. ‘That’s not what I meant, I wish I’d not said that’ ‘You don’t want to, or you feel like you don’t want to ask?’ ask Tom. His dad looked increasingly uncomfortable. ‘I can’t do this’ he said starting to stand. Tom grabbed his arm like he had his a couple of days before’. His dad sat back down. ‘What do you want from this?’ Asked Tom. ‘Why are you so supportive? Why are you buying them for me?’ Asked Tom ‘Son please’ said his dad desperately trying to end the conversation. ‘No, come on dad, we gotta have this discussion’ insisted Tom. His dad started to claw at the said of the chair. ‘Because I remember how much I wanted to go back into nappies, and if I’m honest a part of me still does want to occasionally. I remember bottling it up for years, the anxiety of trying it, hiding it, feeling wrong and weird. When I discovered you’d inherited this from me I decided I didn’t want you to go through what I did. I wanted you to be yourself, be happy, fulfil your desires, be content in yourself’. Tom didn’t know what to say. His dad went on. ‘And if I’m completely honest, I want to share in your joy of it, in a way I never got to. Sorry I know that’s selfish, I don’t want to put you under any pressure, this mustn’t be about me’. ‘I really do appreciate that dad, thanks so much’ said Tom as he came over for a hug. ‘Have I got it right?’ His dad asked ‘What do you mean?’ Asked Tom ‘Do they make you feel how I think they do?’ ‘They do make me feel happy and relaxed’ said Tom. ‘A kind of contentment I’ve not felt in a long time’. ‘Then tell me son, tell me why you shouldn’t wear them as much as you want?’ After a long pause ‘When I say I’m not asking to change you, please don’t think it’s because I wouldn’t. If you asked I’d be right there for you, but I’d never put you under any pressure to, you know that don’t you?’ ‘Yeah I know that dad’ said Tom. ‘I’m not sure that’s something I could handle, at least not now’.

Hey everyone! Yay! We’re now over halfway through this story. There’s a lot more to tell and while some of it will just be going over some of the events I already mentioned in my previous story, I promise there’s going to be lots of twists and turns in store. Went to a Littles party yesterday actually and while that was pretty fun, there was just no way I could edit another chapter in time to be put out before my busy day today. Tomorrow is another busy day unfortunately, and while I will try all that I can to get another chapter out, I might not be able to post again until Monday. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 9: A Healing Fieldtrip Memory can be a fickle thing in one’s life, especially if one suddenly found themselves in the midst of a post-regression and post-locked-in state like I had. On one hand, I was remembering so many things, but I also found that with every pro I found, a con was sure to follow. Remembering that I’m Emma, and it wasn’t just a term to refer to me as, such as ‘girl,’ ‘Little,’ or any other name, was a positive. Feeling like I was called something else at one point and still not remembering it though, not so much. Remembering all the good times with my friends and Nancy felt so wonderful. Remembering how far I had fallen or the new maternal bond that Nancy now insisted we share however, likewise came with a lot of negatives as well. While her temper had improved tremendously, I felt a fear regarding Nancy’s new personality. At first, I thought she would be thrilled as I began to progress in my maturity, but each time I did, I felt a little cloud of maternal yet potent anger hover over her. Even if it was something as simple as crawling across my nursery’s floor one day, I felt like I was in the wrong. In no time at all, I found myself afraid that at any moment, she would snap and try to get me back to where I was as practically a newborn… by any means necessary. Still, while I was at daycare, which soon almost oddly became my sanctuary away from most of my drama back home, I was reunited with both my magical stuffy and my friends. And, if that wasn’t enough, I was progressing much faster here than anyone else had anticipated. I was still in the Burrows room and probably would be for another three months at this rate, but I could tell that I was quickly being retrained in order to go back to the Meadows room one day. While before it felt like a prison, now however, I felt it was a lofty goal for me to strive towards. “Come on, Emma!” Miss Tully cheered from the end of my crib in the Burrows room. “Crawl just a little more for me. Come on, sweetie!” Her encouragement flowed through me, but I felt something else surging in my body lately. It always seemed to be around my magical stuffy, so I figured it was just him working his little powers on me again. I wanted to question it all a little more, but not wanting to deny my little extra help, I had just accepted his seeming magic more and more, regardless of if I wanted to or not. At first, that lack of control sometimes scared me, but I quickly realized it was pushing me the exact amount I needed to be to get to the next step. So, for today as an example, on what was probably the fifth time I was struggling to make it across the crib, I just wanted to stop. Miss Tully freely encouraged me with all her might, but I was dead tired. I could use a nap for sure, and if post-lunch patterns were anything to be believed, a diaper change as well. Still, I tried to move on with all my might, but it didn’t seem to be enough anymore today. Right then though, I heard something float through my head like it had happened on the first day I reawakened. ‘Come on, Emma… come on… just a few crawls more…’ It was strange and almost ethereal with how little it came through, but it was still there. Moreover, I suddenly felt a willfulness in my limbs that almost seemed beyond me. Now, relearning everything that I had once known, that sensation was just kind of strangely common these days, but today, each of my near useless legs began to shuffle back towards Miss Tully. Thinking it was likely just me, Miss Tully cheered me on. “Thatta girl, Emma! Come on! Come to me. That’s it, baby!” Her encouragement felt babyish, but undoubtedly nice. Halfway through, I almost gave up again as my body began to falter for a second time, but once again, another voice floated through my head. ‘Come on, Emma… you can make it!’ It was the last push I needed to get through the final stretch. With almost a burst of energy, my limbs sped, or at least sped up, all the way to the other side of the crib. Miss Tully immediately beamed down at me and gave me a huge smile. “There you go, Emma!” She then picked me up and started bouncing me around. Considering my previous confinement to my crib, these new sensations that I was just freshly remembering again were nearly pure bliss. It was almost unbelievable to go from being essentially just a lump in a crib to being praised for crawling across the very same object. And things like that just started happening more and more to me. It was a grueling process, but not long after, despite a few setbacks every time I left the daycare and nursed from Nancy still, I had already gained the ability to walk when I could at least hold onto something or someone. Fortunately for me, it was just in time to go to on the field trip to the zoo. Nancy had protested that I wasn’t ready yet, but surprisingly, several of the staff members stood up for me, even going as far as to say that ‘it would help my overall progress.’ Nancy didn’t like that at all, but she begrudgingly accepted, which is why I now found myself being pushed in a stroller by Miss Tully. Despite being able to walk long distances now, like would be required at a zoo, something like a stroller was still unfortunately required. To help my self-image and acceptance of it though, I just imagined myself being carted around like I would if I was a queen of some kind. “Lookie, Emma!” Miss Tully shouted out, pointing over to a large bear. “Isn’t he just amazing?” I could only stare back at the bear for a moment in terror. He was at least triple my size and my head could have easily fit inside his tremendous mouth. I didn’t even see his claws full length but considering that just one of them seemed like a butcher knife ready to come for me, I just wanted to keep my distance. Likely sensing my apprehension, Miss Tully moved on and found several other animals I was interested in. Now, despite the details of my life still being fuzzy from before Nancy and Mrs. Tatum’s foster home, I very well knew that I was from a different place than here and hadn’t ever encountered some of the even just common animals to this place. What they saw as the average equivalent of a giraffe, to me, may have been a long dead or just a myth. So, it was no mistake that I was more fascinated with something like a woolly mammoth than a pond of flamingos, despite their double size here. It seemed pretty boring honestly, but when it thundered out its cry and shook the building, I was instantly hooked. Miss Tully, being who she was, noticed. “Aww! Do you like the woolly mammoth, sweetie?” Still unable to articulate more than a few syllables, I took some comfort that I could now speak in full sentences. If someone could understand them was another matter though, so in this case and not wanting to put up with the complex translation process, I just enthusiastically nodded. Fortunately for me, Miss Tully had been taking a special interest in me and was doting her personal attention sole on me today. So, having a free moment and seeing an opportunity for me to interact with the great beast, she quickly rolled me over to the line waiting nearby. It was a bit tedious and I kinda got bored at one point and began to fuss a bit, but finally, it was our turn. So, to better enjoy the experience, Miss Tully unbuckled me and held me in her arms. “Look, Emma. The mammoth is trying to say hello.” Right in front of us and to my utter amusement, I saw the mammoth approach us and wave its long trunk around. It let out another blast, and while several other Littles seemed terrified being so close now, I just giggled and reached out to touch it. It was an annoying habit I still retained from being nearly completely regressed to feel out the world around me, but today, it actually paid off. “Does she want to feed the mammoth, ma’am?” the zookeeper asked us from nearby. Miss Tully looked down at me and seeing my opportunity to interact with something so unique, I once again enthusiastically nodded my head. Both Bigs chuckled and Miss Tully nodded her head to continue with the mammoth interaction. “Yes, thank you. That would be very nice for Emma here.” “Emma… what a pretty name… no doubt short for Emily, huh?” the zookeeper said normally, but also with a strange note that somehow, she was more than a zookeeper. Miss Tully didn’t seem to notice, but as a keen outside observer now from my still static and somewhat regressed mentality, I had started to notice a lot of things. Fortunately, now, I could actually remember what had happened when I did see something. ‘If only I could remember the same with Mrs. Gillies and Nurse Bee…’ It felt important to remember whatever I saw individually between the two of them, but for now, the zookeeper only smiled back and handed Miss Tully a small bag of peanuts. “Okay, Emma. Let’s try this together first.” I nodded, and smiling, Miss Tully emptied a few peanuts into her palm and used her other hand to guide mine underneath hers up to the tips of the mammoth’s trunk. To my delight, seconds later, each of the peanuts was plucked out. Not being able to help myself and finding everything so amusing now, I giggled loudly. “I guess someone liked that, huh?” Miss Tully asked as she nuzzled with me for a moment. Not being able to contain myself anymore, and not even caring that one syllable versus another to Miss Tully would just sound the same, I didn’t care. I still wanted to be heard. “Dah!” Smiling and guiding my hand up once more with some peanuts, I just giggled in happiness as this time, my hand was on top. And again, the mammoth used its trunk and plucked each of the peanuts away. To be honest, it kinda tickled. Satisfied over a successful time seeing the mammoth and other animals of that enclosure of the zoo, Miss Tully used my smiles and limited input to next choose the birdhouse to visit. “Hee!” I shouted out next, hoping to go to one place in particular. As we walked there, we would occasionally see another cluster or two of Littles from the daycare, but today was specifically Littles Day, so everything was extremely crowded as we meandered through the various spaces. To my enjoyment, I even saw Anna and Lilly here today. I waved to both, and while I could still see their sadness and hesitancy over my present condition, I could also see a spark of joy as well. Being told that your friend may never regain their maturity must have been a bitter pill to swallow, even in this society, so seeing me slowly getting better I had to imagine was a big relief. Getting to the birdhouse, I marveled at the immaculate steel and glass structure all around us practically sparkling in the sunlight. It very much looked like one of the old birdcages from the outside, letting plenty of light in on the inside. Dozens of species of birds flocked around and above our heads as electronic barriers kept all the birds inside as extra safety precaution. It was one of the crown jewels of the zoo, which also meant that today, it was very crowded inside. Miss Tully wheeled me through the enclosure, and we saw birds from all over the world. To the east were birds from Asia, the north side had those from Europa, and the west and south sides had a mix of species all over elsewhere ranging from Australia to Metzlum. In each exhibit of the birdhouse, Miss Tully and I saw each of the birds in wonderment, but for me, it wasn’t enough. I was still strapped in my stroller, and I had been getting antsy for a while now. It might have been my diaper riding up or just the straps being too tight, but I wanted out. Miss Tully tried to convince me otherwise and get me to calm down, but she knew a losing battle when she saw one. Quickly being unbuckled, I practically sprang to the near invisible wall in front of me, separating the visitors from most of the birds. I felt I could almost just reach out and touch one of them, but my hand soundly colliding with the barrier was about as close as I got. Unfortunately for Miss Tully’s soon-to-be frayed nerves, a whole mass of other daycare Littles had just arrived at the group and were quickly crowding me. Now, I wasn’t exactly a slouch anymore as far as my physical abilities were concerned, but it didn’t take long for me to give way and slowly be edged away. Not being too tall either, she didn’t see me, and being too distracted by the wonderous birds, I didn’t even realize I was slowly getting pushed away from her. I thought I heard some woman yelling as I moved onto the next enclosure, but it didn’t take long for me to get distracted and see a dodo bird standing right in front of me. He was so goofy looking, and I wanted to touch him. I knew it was impossible on one level, but my still regressed instincts remained a powerful force in my body. Getting a little too close though, the dodo bird flapped away. “Bih!” I cried out before following the fascinating creature. Soon, I was in a part of the birdhouse that didn’t seem to be very popular. The birds were more ordinary and could be even found locally in some cases, so most groups avoided the area unless they were trying to be alone on purpose or were here on a school field trip and needed to complete their mandatory scavenger hunt. I just wanted to see the dodo bird up close coming in here, but soon, something else caught my easily distracted eye. I wasn’t sure of what it was at first, but my eyes were quickly drawn to the shiny nature of the object on the ground. I tried to will every ounce of my body away from the red shiny spot in front of me, but with my regressed instincts and still partially uncontrollable body, I dashed to it as fast as I could. In retrospect, I probably looked like a cat jumping over a laser on the ground, and part of me wanted to groan over my perceived immaturity with something as simple as an object being shiny, but my movements just powered forward. “Shi! Shi!” It wasn’t long before it darted just out of my reach, so, now hooked, I chased after it. “Shi! Shi! Doh go! Nu! Co ba hee!” With my waddled stance, I ran as best I could after the ever-moving dot. A few corridors, down some stairs, and even through a pair of doors. I had no idea where I was, but the shiny dot soon stopped in the middle of the room. Determined to catch my prey, I leaped over on top of it. ‘I got you now!’ But when I uncapped my clasped hands, instead of seeing my prize in all its glory, nothing was there. Frustrated, I could feel a few tears begin to mist my eyes. In desperation, I looked around, but the shiny spot was gone, and I realized two things with a growing sense of terror. First, I had no idea where I was, now seeing that the bright lights of the birdcage were completely replaced by concrete walls and dim lighting. Second, I started to hear noises all around me. I tried to scamper to the door I thought I had come through, but in seconds, the room was filled by at least five people. I feared the worst and that I was now about to be kidnapped by Bigs and sold into Little’s slavery, as had become horrifyingly popular again, but as my scared eyes opened a crack when I wasn’t immediately seized, I saw they were almost all my size. “Easy, easy, sweetie…” the one a little bit out front of the others said as she held her arms up as if she was surrendering to me. “We don’t want to hurt you. We just want to help…” I only could stare back at her, namely her clothing. Tactical gear adorned most of her body and there were some painted shapes on her shoulders I didn’t recognize, but thinking back, they quickly reminded me of what Sarge often looked when Jimmy outfitted him for one of his mock wars in daycare with the other stuffy’s. “Sodoah?” I asked inquisitively. The other members of the group looked at each other questioningly, but the leader came closer to me and stared deeply into my eyes. “I don’t think you’re asking for a soda, and while my friends here think you’re a lost cause, I don’t think you are.” She squinted her eyes back at me as if she was trying to read my mind. It made me a little scared to be honest. “Hmmm… let’s do this. I ask a few questions and you just nod back. So, first, can you understand me?” I wasn’t sure if this was a trick and the guns a few of them carried definitely frightened me, but the leader just seemed to have kind eyes. I wanted to know more about her and who she was, but not seeing the harm in indulging her question, I nodded. Her face quickly lit up. “Perfect. Now, is your name… Emma?” I nodded. “Good. Is your caregiver, mommy, mistress, nanny, babysitter, or foster caretaker named Nancy?” I wasn’t sure about some of those labels, but I recognized a few as belonging to Nancy, so again, I nodded. She grinned back at her friends. “Three affirmations. Is that good enough for you, Martinez?” One of the shorter ones in the back of the group sighed and then rolled their eyes. “Yeah, Bree. It’s enough. Just get it over with so we can get out of here. Netsky is already getting back chatter of a missing Little. This area’s going to be swarming soon.” The leader, Bree, nodded her head and smiled back at me for a moment, before looking extremely serious. “Sorry, Emma. This isn’t personal. We just need you back in play.” I started to question what was happening, but two of the group soon lunged and gripped me tightly by the arms. I felt a sudden warmth in the front of my diaper, but I was far more focused on what my eyes were now seeing as a giant needle headed straight for me. “Way! Way! Nu!” I tried to struggle as much as I could, but I was still no match for any of those now holding onto me. I did everything in my power to resist, but the other member of the group walked right up to me and stuck my exposed upper arm with the shot without an ounce of hesitation. It hurt something awful, and I probably would have screamed out in terror, but the members were well prepared and quickly plugged my mouth with a massive pacifier. Scared out of my mind, I saw as Bree walked closer to me and forced me to look directly at her. Oddly though, her gesture was soft and tender… not angry or brutal as I might expect in these situations. I was so confused what was happening. Bree then sighed. “I’m very sorry. I know that probably hurt a lot, but since I know you can understand me, I’ll just start talking while it takes effect. As you heard, we don’t have much time left together.” She closed her eyes for a moment and then pulled out a photo of Nancy and showed it to me. “This is Nancy, right?” I quickly nodded, but I also started to feel a funny feeling up in my head. Oddly enough, it almost felt… more awake, but the feeling was intermittent, and I really couldn’t tell if there was a pattern to it or not. Bree sighed again and pocketed the photo. “We normally don’t intervene in your types of situations. We wish we could, but we would never accomplish any of our other goals with everyone needing help. Helcats can focus on that portion of Littles.” She then paused and gestured to her friends. “See, we extract or awaken Littles like you to gather information or force actions into play that are beneficial to us in the long run. For you, we need to see what Nancy does with how you are… or at least will be. We believe she is connected with a dangerous figure high up in the pro-big movement.” I tired to rack my brain about who it could be, but I was still coming up blank, even as they removed my pacifier. “Soeee… No can hewp you…” I wanted to say more, but I then realized I actually could say more. The others in the group giggled over my reaction as my arms were set free. Bree smiled back. “Yeah. That’s the drugs working alright. Say you hit your head or something like that when you’re asked later about your ‘miraculous’ recovery, and they should just accept it. It’s the sad positive and negative with them using new experimental super drugs on us Littles. Outcomes can always vary.” My mind wheeled about with what had all just happened, and while my body still felt very much the same, portions of my brain I thought were long dormant, almost seemed to start waking up. My memory sadly was still massively full of holes, but it was a huge relief to feel more or less like… well, me. Still, even with all my relief, I still had one pressing question. “Who aww you?” Bree smiled and helped me back to my feet fully. “I’m Bree, or Briana, but we’re Omega Force. Part of the pro-Littles movement. We want to help bring about…” But right before she could say another word, a loud beeping noise could be heard. “Boss!” the one they had referred to Netsky called out. “Incoming! Suggest extraction in t-minus two!” Bree quickly looked panicked. “Shoot! Faster than I thought.” She looked back to arm and sighed. “At least we got you pumped up, but now, follow us and we’ll get you topside without getting you into trouble.” I was still so confused, but not really seeing an alternative and feeling they knew a lot more than they were letting on, I readily followed them out, and sure enough, I was soon bathed in the relatively still abandoned upper halls of the birdhouse. “Dank you…” I said back. Bree smiled. “You’re very welcome, Emma. Just stay safe but go. Rejoin Miss Tully.” We both waved goodbye at each other, and I went to find Miss Tully once their team was fully out of sight. It didn’t take long before I saw the panic my absence had caused. Security guards were scrambling all over the place and Mrs. Gillies had even arrived on the scene and seemed to really be yelling at Miss Tully. I instantly felt guilty over having wandered off before, but part of me felt everything was justified on my end at least as my brain had never felt better. So, knowing I just had to get this out of the way, I ran over to Miss Tully and Mrs. Gillies. “Miss Tuwwy! “Missus Giwees! I wigh’ hewe!” I shouted out to a clearly panicked duo near some security guards. I expected they would have been positively thrilled to see me again and seeming much better now, but instead, I just saw dozens of confused looks stare right back at me. The questions that followed seemed never-ending and being a loyal person to the Littles apart of Omega Force that had saved me, I didn’t reveal what really happened. Instead, I just made up some bogus story about falling and bumping my head a bit, just as they had suggested, as I tried to chase the dodo bird. Their hope for a simple explanation was my strength and I was just glad that in my new mental state, I could actually use it. So, satisfied at least for now, everyone got on the bus and left the zoo. Once we were safely back at daycare, though, I could see the worried expressions from the staff and even a few of my fellow Littles. Littles simply did not just poof and get better. Fortunately, My Tully and Miss Valerie seemed on my side. “Maybe it had to do with how she was regressed?” Miss Valerie offered up as an explanation. “What do you mean by that?” Mrs. Gillies questioned suspiciously. Miss Valerie almost responded, but Miss Tully stopped her first. “It’s okay, Val. I’ve got this. I need to speak my mind anyway.” After a nod from Miss Valerie, Miss Tully turned to Mrs. Gillies. “We all respect your hiring decisions, ma’am, but’ it’s just that… well, we don’t really know what goes into Nurse Bee’s formulas that she uses.” “Shhh!” Miss Mindy shushed her coworker. “We don’t want everyone hearing about what really goes on here. We’re ‘Little friendly’ but we’re not ‘pro-Little.’ You want to get sued into the ground?” Miss Tully nodded. “Right. Sorry, but honestly though… we really don’t know anything about what she uses. That’s a problem in and of itself, but maybe there’s a half-life to it or something in certain doses or even whatever formula she used.” Miss Tully then looked around the gathered group and frowned. “Where is the good nurse anyway?” Mrs. Gillies sighed. “She’s on leave. Some personal matter. You know my policy not to pry into certain things outside of these daycare walls. She’ll be back tomorrow anyways… I suggest we ask her some questions then, okay?” The rest of the staff hesitated but then ultimately nodded at the notion. Somehow, I doubted that if any of them had objected truly that they would have noted so then. Regardless, Nancy soon picked me up and as soon as Miss Tully whispered something in her ear, I could already see the burning flames nearly erupt out of her head. A silent car drive later and I knew that tonight was going to be a rough one with her. So, I should have known better, but I honestly had to tell Nancy about my day at the zoo. Not the shot part, but definitely all the animal’s part. She may have been going down a dark path, but there was still some part of me that wanted her to know everything about my day. So, I started up, not even seeing the issue with doing so. “We wen’ to da zoo taday!” Nancy halted and her face dropped. I wondered if I had said something wrong or if she had finally snapped, but I knew that wasn’t the case when her face turned into a wicked snarl. “You got better… I thought Miss Tully was just trying to get me to crack, but how?” I yelled. “How did you get better?” Her teeth gritted against themselves, and she quickly thumped over to me and grabbed my arm and looked deeply into my eyes. “This morning… this morning… you were all cooing and babbles. Walking but still a baby… now…” If I didn’t know any better, she almost seemed disgusted with how she saw me now. I was so confused and more than a little scared. “I’m losing you, damn it! You were mine… all mine! And now…” her emotions seemed to quickly fluctuate between sorrow and anger. I almost felt bad for her, seeing how she had finally accepted her new role only for me to already be getting better by then. It was a small feeling, and to be honest, each time I came home to find her angry over my new ability, that speck of sympathy just grew smaller. Her face then swung back to anger, and she seemed to get an idea of some kind. “The daycare… it was the daycare, wasn’t it?” I just stood there like a statue, neither wanting to get the daycare or Omega Force into trouble. I was stuck between lies or betrayal no matter what, but a cold, slithering voice soon froze my heart. “And just what did you expect?” a somewhat familiar voice asked rhetorically from the kitchen. “That’s just what and who they are.” To my dreaded surprise, Nurse Bee then exited and glared down at me. “They just want Littles like Emma here to take over this country. Pro-Littles the lot of them! Just you wait.” “So, what do I do?” Nancy questioningly wailed. I could feel the pain behind her words, but these two getting together suddenly started clicking within my head. ‘Maybe Omega force is here because of their relationship… but why? What could be so important about Nurse Bee?’ I was still puzzled over the notional conspiracy theory, but Nurse Bee quickly interrupted my thoughts. “I’ll tell you what we’re going to do,” Nurse Bee said definitively. “We’re going to strike back. They hit us, we hit them. Check all the corners of that place for anti-regression devices. Insist on it. After all, they can’t deny you forever.” Nancy seemed hesitant though. “I don’t know… isn’t that crossing a line though?” Nurse Bee glared back. “Don’t you want your baby Little back. Don’t you want your sweet tiny Emma back in your arms like she only was a week ago?” Nancy seemed to hesitate, but Nurse Bee just doubled down. “Look at her, Nancy. She’s already this mature in such a short period. What is she going to be like in a week? A month? Is she even going to need you anymore?” Nancy’s brain obviously was on overload, but with each passing second, her face only grew angrier. Nurse Bee was getting through to her and I knew it wouldn’t be long before her frustrations were taken out on me. “What do we do?” she asked coldly. Nurse Bee smiled back. “There are several things we can do. I’ll do some checking with stock and get you what you need or what I can get on short notice.” She paused and looked back at me briefly before switching back to Nancy. “So, now do you believe me about the daycare being part of the pro-Littles movement around here?” Nancy seemed to think again for a moment, but then just nodded. “I do. I can’t believe I was so stupid, but yes, I do believe.” I had never seen Nurse Bee so happy in my life. “Perfect.” The two then got a whole lot closer to me and looked in my direction with looks of anger, desire, and power dancing in their eyes. “For tonight though, nurse her. Force her if needed but nurse her. For now, it’s something and can tip the scales in your favor over time if they decide to get dirty in all this.” I wished and hoped like I never had before that Nancy would somehow break off this notion and just take care of me in the ways I still needed. I wanted her to be my caregiver more than anything else by now, but Nurse Bee had knotted her up all good and proper by now. So, without the slightest hesitation, Nancy nodded and grabbed me into her lap. I tried to struggle, but both Bigs just held me firm in her lap. Unfortunately, due to my still-present regressed instincts, as soon as Nancy was adjusted and unhooked her nursing bra, my body essentially went onto autopilot. As my lips wrapped around her engorged and somewhat leaking nipple, I could already feel my body giving in. Worse, it didn’t take long for my sucking reflex to soon kick in as well. I tried to fight, struggle, even bite back, back her milk had done its damage to me already. While incontinence, slower thinking, sleepiness, and a slight buzzing feeling were usual side effects, another was its addictive properties. Within seconds, like an addict returning for their high, I took in the milk with greedy abandonment. Soon, my eyes closed. I wondered about Omega Force, and I worried about my future. Plus, Nurse Bee was here and was clearly a bad influence on Nancy. I was powerless to stop any of it though, and as my belly filled with the milkshake-like milk, despite everything, I could only drift off in peace as the effects fully took ahold of me.

Here is the first chapter of my brand new LittleMonstrumVerse ABDL story - Arbitrio Sanguinis! My 11th novel so far, and 3rd novel in the 'LittleMonstrumVerse' series I've been writing. Set after the Infernum Infantem Christmas Special, we see my monster universe through another pair of eyes... ones looking for a special someone. Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them. They really help with the motivation to write more! Don't forget you get get 2 week early access (so 4 chapters) to my main ongoing story, if you subscribe to my Subscribestar. Also, please link to my stories rather than posting them as files when sharing with others! Chapter 1: Ennui Arbitrio Sanguinis – LittleFallenPrincess “Luce…?” “Lucy…” “Miss Piddlepants…” “Baby bloodsucker…” “Mushtush…” I could hear them all trying to get my attention, trying to tease me into responding… but I found it hard to break my eye contact with the floor. I was currently winning my staring contest with it, and I wasn’t going to let myself lose now, not this late into the game. Because I play to win… and totally not to avoid looking at all my happy friends with all their happy families and partners… totally not to avoid thinking about how everyone has someone but me… totally not to see all my friends sitting on their Mummy’s or Daddy’s laps… feeling happy… little… loved… Nope. Because that would make me a grumpy sourpuss. And I didn’t want to bring down the mood of the event by telling anyone what was really going on in my head. I had been hiding it for the longest time now and no matter what… I wasn’t going to bother any of them with it. Especially not since that whole awkward Christmas party that Nia had to deal with. I wasn’t going to add to her plate right now, she was still in her blissful post-engagement period where she and Vic couldn’t stop bragging about the proposal or the ring that Nia wore on her finger. Her stupid adorable finger. Totally not salty that everyone I knew was either married, getting married, or getting serious with a partner or partner. Totally not salty at the fact I hadn’t dated anyone in a long time, not since my shitty abusive ex. And no, I’m not counting those few I found online that I stupidly got my hopes up about… only to be disappointed and alone. Totally not salty. Because I can’t be. I can’t ruin this for them. Or bother them with it. I’m already a bother. They’re already so accepting of me, and so nice to me… I don’t want to ever bother them more than I already do. So for now, I’ll continue staring at the floor, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone, making it look like I’m in my own little world, unable to hear them. They’ll stop eventually, then I’ll apologise like I always do, and then they can move on and I can go on… avoiding looking at my best friends in the world because they’re happy and I’m just… un… un… …Unloveable. Thankfully, as predicted, they moved on with their conversation and let me be, discussing a camping trip they were planning for later this year, sometime in late summer. No doubt I’d be invited, but honestly… I wasn’t sure I even wanted to go. Not on my own anyway. It’ll just be the same as these events, they all get super romantic and couple-y… and I’m left on my own… with no dance partner to dance with. That’s all I want in life. Or in my case, un-life. In my long un-life as a vampire, I’ve dated, I’ve found partners… but none of them lasted. At first I tried to protect my humanity, focusing on dating only humans. But the ones who know about our supernatural world aren’t all amazing allies, the few I did try dating early on in my vampiric life… were only out to get turned. They had been familiars of other vampires, and since vampires like to promise to turn them but end up never doing it… they seek outside sources. So of course they all used me to get turned… At least I realised after the first one that I was being played, so that quickly stopped and I moved away from dating humans altogether. Instead I focused on our own community. But this was at the start of the last century… so it was a bit more difficult to find someone. Much smaller dating pools. I tried dating a couple of vanillas… but they freaked out and ran when I started being myself, my more… infantile self… At the time, I wasn’t even aware of this kink I have, or my little side, I just tried dating someone who was a bit more serious than me, and looking back now… yeah, they were vanilla. So I gave up dating monstrum too, well… vanilla ones (though again, didn’t realise until later that they were known as ‘vanilla’, I just didn’t want to date anyone overly serious who couldn’t stand my childishness). Which limited my dating pool even further, as it was shortly after this that I met my ex, the one I ran into again last year. That was a thing, she introduced me to this kink and the world of kink, that’s it. End of story. Nothing else to say. So I gave up dating again, even kinksters this time. For decades I had nothing… no one… at least no one who didn’t abuse me but let’s not talk about those two relationships just yet… then I met Beth. I thought I felt a spark between us… but that ended up just being a best friendship. I’m not complaining, I love Beth to bits, as I do all my friends… but I still wanted that bit extra. It hurt even more when I set her and her wife up together, before Susie had died and got resurrected as a zombie, but I knew they’d be a perfect match. I mean me and Bea had a very very brief thing, but we very quickly realised we weren’t really that into each other and were happier as friends. So around that period of my life I just stopped dating, focusing entirely on making friends… but that didn’t really get me anywhere either. I had Beth and Bea and that was about it. Eventually I’d meet Susie when I went to University, but I still didn’t date anyone. Then Grim and Abby came into my life and I moved in with them. And for the longest time, I’ve kept my sadness hidden inside me, trying to appear as strong as possible to all my friends, so as to not bring them down into my depression and my loneliness bubble. At this point I was sure I’d never find anyone. Nia and Victoria had this amazing backstory about them meeting and getting together. Demons, summonings, cults… I mean Vic even died for Nia, and Nia went to Hell for her… and that’s not even getting into her whole ‘being a fallen angel’ thing. Which I still can’t get over. Freakin’ angels! Susie and Beth too. Susie found out about Beth being a Witch, died, got resurrected, and then got hunted by Death. So Beth created this Sanctuary, a place where monstrum from all over can come for… well… Sanctuary. They can come here to hide out from hunters, they can come here after escaping abusive partners or after humans have found out about them. Or… they can just come for help regarding anything. And Susie and Beth will help them, no questions asked. Like… these two are made for each other, and I love it… but it also breaks my heart that I don’t have an awesome partner with an awesome backstory. Even Abby has her partners, who had both turned up for today’s littles event, both fussing over the very blushy little kitsune. They really treated the girl like their daughter, fussing over her and spoiling her and making sure she’s never wanting for anything. And from how I’ve heard Abby talk about them… she isn’t just using them for her money. Not that she’s that kind of person anyway, but she genuinely loves these two. So whilst she doesn’t have an awesome backstory full of death and sacrifice and love… she has TWO people loving her with all their heart. Why does she get two… when I get… no one. Even Grim is here with his Daddy, for the first time. Turns out his Daddy is very new to all this, and was very nervous about coming to an event, but Grimfang managed to convince his fellow werewolf boyfriend to attend today. They have this adorable story about how they met, sounding like they had met in a freaking romantic comedy. Like… Come on! Where’s my romantic comedy? Where’s my caregiver? Where’s my tale of defying Death for love? No… Instead I was stuck here, in this meaningless existence, slowly dwindling away day by day. It was a struggle to even eat, often my housemates would need to bring me… ‘sustenance’… from our ethical supplier, and pressure me to drink it. Because most days consisted of me getting out of bed (no, I know I’m a vampire, but only old school vamps sleep in coffins), going on my PC, playing games… then going to bed when the sun comes up again. I barely left my room, going back into my old ways, back to before I started opening up. Then Nia came into my life and gave me a little hope that maybe I’d find someone… so I put myself out there… only to be massively disappointed. Then her engagement happened and I got another boost in morale… but so far it isn’t going well. There just aren’t that many single Mummies out there, especially not monstrum ones. So I’ll just continue being alone. Feeling this hopelessness but keeping it bottled up insi… “Luce…” Nia said, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of my seat. Before I could respond, complain… or even react, she pulled me away from our little group in the corner, past some littles that were playing in the ballpit, past Medusa, who was colouring in a picture for her Mummy, and towards the plastic adult-sized playhouse in the far corner. She poked her head in, whilst still holding my hand, to check if it was clear, before turning around and smiling at me. “All clear! Come on, grumpy pants…” She said, pulling me into the playhouse and closing the big red plastic door. “Sit. Now!” I did as she said, and sat in the corner on my thickly padded butt, my red babydoll dress lifting slightly as I took my place, revealing the thick nappy between my very pale legs. Quickly fixing my dress, I adjusted myself so I was comfortable on the squishy play mat underneath me. “So… spill it.” Nia said, sitting opposite me and looking at me intensely. “Spill what? I can’t spill anything, I’ve got a baba…” I joked, trying to move away from the real reason we were in this playhouse right now. “Oi, I’m the one who makes snarky jokes. Stay in your lane, little vampling.” Nia grinned at me. “No, seriously, what’s up hun?” “What do you mean? Everything is fine!” I replied, putting on the best fake smile I could for my friend. “I know I’m still relatively new to emotions and people and everything… but I’m pretty sure I can spot when my best friend is down in the dumps about something. So spill it!” “I’m fine, I promise!” I lied again. “We’re not leaving this playhouse until you tell me what’s going on in that silly little mind of yours…” “Nothing… I…” “Sweetie… don’t you just want to… tell me… everything…?” Nia said, crawling over slowly, her padded hips swaying back and forth as her tail swished about, before she got to me. Lifting her hand, she placed it under my chin and lifted, so my eyes couldn’t break contact with hers. “Come on…” I could feel something stirring within me, as if I wanted to… no, as if I needed to do whatever she said… That’s when it clicked. “OI! NO USING SUCCUBUS POWERS!” I yelled at her, maybe a little too loudly. She instantly threw off this sultry persona and sat back on her padded butt, pouting with her arms crossed in front of me. “Fine! But you have to tell me. It’s in the best friend's rules.” “I… fine. I… I’m just… I’m lonely.” “But we’re all here, having fun! All your friends!” She argued. “Not that way… I’m very thankful for you all… but seeing you…” “Oh.” Nia’s face dropped and she quickly hid her engagement ring with her other hand. “Seeing us all with our caregivers… with partners… Oh hun, I’m sorry…” “Yeah… got it in one.” I sighed. “Sweetie, it’s just a matter of time. You’ll find someone. And I bet they’re gonna be the bestest Mummy ever, making you happier than ever.” “I thought that with my ex…” “Yes, and that was a lesson that will allow you to sense people who are wrong for you from now on. Trust me, your time is soon. Just… keep a little bit of hope, please?” “I… can’t promise…” “Where are you looking these days? I thought you were putting yourself out there again? What about that human you were dating when I first met you?” “Didn’t work out, she ghosted me. And I tried a website for monstrum. That didn’t work out either. People were vampire chasers. Or… the other kind of chaser…” I said, rolling my eyes in disgust. “Oh? OH… eww…” Nia said as she finally understood just what I meant. “Fuck them. That doesn’t bother me. You’re just this really fuckin cool chick who is also my best fuckin friend.” “You do realise that…?” “That Vic would tan my hide if she heard me using this language? Why do you think we’re hiding out in the playhouse? And even if she didn’t… Beatrice would…” “That I would pay to see…” I grinned. “OI! Don’t you start! You don’t know what it’s like to be spanked by that witch!” “No, because I’m a good girl.” My grin grew twice as big. “So am I!” Nia whined. “...Most of the time.” I giggled at my friend, who just pouted back at me again. “Why… Why don’t you try dating humans again? Or maybe ask Beth if there are any other dating websites for us lot?” “I tried dating humans. It’s… not good.” “And humans have changed a lot in the billion years since you got turned into a vampire…” “I’m not that old! You’re way older than me, Miss ‘I’m actually an angel from the dawn of time’.” “Yeah but… for someone so old, I look hot.” She said, posing in a seductive way as a joke. “Agreed.” I said, sticking my tongue out at her and smiling. “Why don’t you try it? For me? Please? I hate to see you so lonely.” “Sorry…” “No! No more apologising! This isn’t your fault, silly girl. Just find a dating website, make a profile, put yourself out there. No, in fact… ten dating websites. We’re gonna find you a Mama, no matter what it takes! Why not try finding a vanilla person and introducing them to this?” I loved Nia’s optimism. It… was actually infectious. I could feel that drive to put myself out there again… and it scared me. But a small part of me was excited that maybe… just maybe… …I’d find someone. ======================================================= So... new story! New perspective! More evil cliffhangers await! I hope you enjoyed this, and continue to enjoy it as the story progresses. I put a lot of emotion into this story, as you can probably tell, and a lot more of myself into some of the characters. But don't worry, there will be a lot of fun too! -------------------------------------------- Thinking of finally opening up short story commissions now too finally, now that my writers block seems to have subsided. If you haven't seen, I'm now up and running on Subscribestar! (Sorry for the reminder again, trying to get my subscribers back after the Patreon rubbish!) ======================================================== I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Please leave likes and comments and all that fun stuff, I love reading them! If you want to read the next 4 chapters, thanks to two weeks early access to my main story and also soon-to-be exclusive access to short stories (or even have a chance at commissioning one when I add the tier for them!), why don't you check out my SubscribeStar! The basic tier gets early access and exclusive access to short stories (when they're written), higher tiers will be limited but get a short story each month (1-2 per month in total, also not yet running this tier yet, will announce when I'm starting!). Thank you to all my subscribers for their support over the past few years! Seriously, your support means the world to me. New chapters of my latest story every Wednesday/Sunday! Also just a quick note: I don't mind people saving this story for personal reading. But I'd appreciate it if people didn't post it elsewhere, even if you're just suggesting it to other people. If you want to show others, please send them a link to the first page of this post! Thanks!

After being diapered off and on basically my entire life and missing the days where I'd frequently wet the bed when I was a kid, I decided to just start wearing and using premium diapers 24-7 in December 2023. I also recently started following the 12 month diaper training guide that gets mentioned here quite often and now in April 2024 I'm proud to say that I'm wetting frequently with strong sudden urges but not much comes out and also dribbling involuntarily post void. I also woke up to a wet bed last night without remembering peeing for the first time in many years and I couldn't be more proud of myself. This stage seemed to come recently and out of nowhere for me after only feeling like I needed to pee sooner than before and that was it for a long time. I'd wake up needing to pee, frustrated that my body woke itself up to do so, peed myself then went back to sleep. This is finally starting to change. So don't get discouraged or frustrated if you're trying to accomplish the same thing I have. Be patient, stay hydrated and wet yourself no matter what as soon as you feel the urge to pee. You have to act like you don't have any choice. It's a mental barrier that you must break because we were trained at a very young age that it's not okay to pee yourself. Tell yourself that it is okay even if you think you might leak. I'm Looking forward to continuing down this path and I'm looking forward to the point of no return. To those that think that it isn't possible to make yourself incontinent, my nose and sheets are saying otherwise right now...

Sorry for the delay again. I guess I should not write checks that I can't cash when it comes to self-imposed deadlines on posting chapters that I have not even begun to write yet. I probably should have said in my first post for this story that there will be some strong language in this story at times. If I had to give this story a TV rating overall, it would be TV-M for language. Other than that, I would consider it SFW. Chapter 7 I woke the next morning to Rachael asking if I needed more morphine. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I nod yes. Rachael injected me with the syringe of morphine, and another syringe of the nausea medicine, and started my feeding tube. I turn to my left to see that both my parents are already here. My attention snaps back to Rachael saying, “Will, you have a busy day ahead of you, let’s go ahead and get you weighed and measured.” “OK,” I said. I started to slowly get out of bed and my dad was already by my side to get my I.V. situated and helped me to my feet. I felt a weakness in my legs and was struggling to move this morning more than in the past few days. My mom, seeing me struggle, asked, “Will, how do you feel this morning?” I said, “I just feel really tired and weak.” “I'm sorry you feel so bad, hopefully, the doctors at the Mayo Clinic will help you get better soon,” my Mom said. “I hope so too,” I said. We made our way to the nurse station and Rachael weighed and measured me. Before my dad could ask Rachael said, “Alright Will, you weigh a 112 pounds and are 5 foot 4 and ½ inches tall this morning;” pausing for a second, she said, “We should be getting you ready for transport in the next hour or two. I will come check on you in a little bit to flush your feeding tube and get you ready.” I slowly make it to my room with my parents on either side of me. I gingerly get back into bed as my mom plugs my I.V. pump back in for me. My mom turned to me and asked, “I was going to pack up all your belongings to bring to the Mayo Clinic with us so you don’t have to worry about it while being transported there. Is there anything other than your backpack and toiletries that I am missing?” “Besides my stuff on the table, that is everything,” I said. She said, “OK, I will make sure I have everything to bring to the other hospital for you.” I said, “Thanks, I'm going to go ahead and brush my teeth before you pack everything up.” I got back out of bed as my mom unplugged the I.V. pump again for me and slowly made my way into the bathroom. I quickly brushed my teeth and as I was brushing my teeth, I noticed that my nails were very long. Looking in my toiletry bag, I found my nail clippers and was able to get my nails down to a manageable length. I sat on the toilet seat, pulled my socks out, and saw that my toenails were in need of trimming too, and decided to trim them while I was at it. I came back out of the bathroom to my mom waiting to help me back into bed. Once getting settled in bed I watched as my mom started packing all my belongings up. My dad then spoke up saying, “Will, is there anything in particular that you want to watch on TV?” “No, not really,” I said. My dad then said, “Sports Center it is then.” I lay in bed half-heartedly watching TV and dozing in and out of consciousness. Sometime later, I was alerted to Rachael walking into the room. “Alright Will, I’m going to flush your feeding tube and disconnect your I.V. to make it easier for being transported to the Mayo Clinic,” Rachael said. I nodded and watched her flush my feeding tube, disconnect my I.V., and throw everything away. Rachael then said, “Someone should be here soon to bring you downstairs to an ambulance for transport.” I said, “OK” “Will, I hope they find out what is going on and you get better soon,” Rachael said. “Me too, sorry about the whole bathroom and pain medicine incident the other day,” I said. In a serious voice, Rachael said, “Will, that was nothing to be embarrassed about, I have to deal with a lot worse and would not be a nurse if I could not handle it.” I said, “OK, thanks for looking after me.” “Certainly Will,” Rachael said with a smile. My mom then chimed in, ”Thank you, Rachael.” “No problem, I hope you all have a better week this week than last,” Rachael said. Around 15 minutes after Rachael left, an orderly came into my room pushing a wheelchair. He asked, “Are you William Gauss?” I said, “Yes.” “OK, I’m here to bring you downstairs for transport,” he said. I nodded and slowly started getting out of bed. My parents were already up and by my side. My dad hugged me and said, “We should be at the Mayo Clinic shortly after you get there. I love you.” My mom then hugged me and with a kiss on the cheek said, “I love you, sweetheart, we will see you in a little bit.” As I was sitting down in the wheelchair I said, “I love y’all too.” My parents both waved to me as I was being wheeled out of the room. The orderly wheeled to the elevator and we rode it down to the ground floor. He then pushed through the back of the emergency department to what looked like an exit. Waiting for me at the exit was a stretcher and a tall paramedic wearing a dark blue uniform with EMS patches on the shoulders of his sleeves. As the wheelchair came to a stop he said, “You must be William Gauss, my name is Matt and I will be your ride to the Mayo Clinic.” I nodded and he and the orderly helped me out of the wheelchair and onto the stretcher. As the orderly was leaving, Matt turned to me and said, “I’m going to strap you down so we don’t have to worry about you falling off the stretcher during transport.” I nodded and Matt processed to run a strap over my sternum, my waist, and then my thighs. Matt then said, “You're all set, let's get you loaded up for transport.” He pushed me through the double doors and out into the bright Arizona sun. As my eyes adjust to the harsh light, I see the ambulance parked about 30 feet from the doors and a short Latino man also wearing a paramedic uniform walking towards us. As he met up with us he said, “My name is Ernesto and I will be your driver today.” They both loaded the stretcher into the back of the ambulance and as it was pushed all the way in I could hear and feel what must have been it locking into place. As Matt was getting into the back to sit beside me, Ernesto said, “We should have you at the Mayo Clinic in about 30 minutes, if you need anything let Matt know.” He closed the back doors and a few seconds later I could hear what must have been the front driver door opening and closing. Moments later I could feel the ambulance start moving forward. Matt turned to me and said, “Do you prefer to go by William or Will?” I said, “Will is fine.” “Alright Will, just relax and we will have you there in no time,” he said. Nodding, I relaxed my body against the restraints and let my mind wander as I felt the movement of the ambulance and the sound of the tires against the road. Sometime later, I felt the one thing that I didn’t want to feel on this trip, I had to poop. Thinking to myself ‘CRAP!’ as I turned my head to Matt. I asked, “How much longer until we get to the Mayo Clinic?” Matt said, “About 10 more minutes, is there something wrong?” “I have to go to the bathroom really bad,” I said. Matt then said, “Try and hold it if you can but if you have an accident it will be OK.” I nodded but turned my full attention to holding back my bowels. The minutes seemed to drag on as I put all of my energy into clenching my butt cheeks together. I felt the ambulance turn and with that motion, some poop slipped out; moments later the battle was lost as I felt my body force the rest of my bowels out. I could feel it spread out all over my bottom, moving up my lower back, forward in my underwear covering my genitals, and down my thighs. I turned to Matt with flushed cheeks and said, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hold it.” Matt gently placed his hand on my shoulder and with a look of concern and pity, he said, “It’s OK Will, as soon as we get to the hospital, we will help you get cleaned up.” I nodded but looked away in shame, as I lay in what felt like a gallon of pluff mud and smelled like a paper mill. A couple of minutes later, I felt the ambulance come to a stop, and moments later, Ernesto was opening the back doors. Matt hopped out the back and they both pulled the stretcher out of the back of the ambulance. Matt took over and quickly pushed me into what I imagine is the ambulance entrance to the emergency room at the Mayo Clinic. As we make our way through the double doors into a hallway, we are met with an average-height Latino woman with shoulder-length hair, in gray scrubs. With a smile, she approached us and said, “You must be William, my name is Rosie and I will be your nurse.” I just nodded and looked down at my lap. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Matt gesture to Rosie and they both stepped away to have a quiet conversation. A few moments later, Rosie walked back up to me and said, “OK Will, Matt, and I are going to take you straight to your room on the stretcher, once there, I will help you out of your clothes so you can take a shower.” I just nodded and continued to look at my lap. A second later, Matt was pushing the stretcher and following Rosie down the hallways. After a few turns and trying my best to avoid eye contact with passers-by, we arrived at an elevator. We got on the elevator and luckily it was only the three of us, but in the enclosed space, the smell was back with a vengeance. A minute later we were off the elevator and going down another hallway. After passing what I assume is a nurse’s station, I was wheeled into a room. Matt immediately started undoing the straps, while I saw Rosie place what looked to be a large incontinence bed pad on the floor beside the stretcher. Rosie and Matt then helped me off the stretcher to stand on top of the pad. Rosie said, “Matt, at the nurse’s station, is cleaning supplies and you can throw the fitted sheet away there.” Matt said, “OK, Will, I hope you feel better soon.” Matt rolled the stretcher back out of the room and shut the door behind him. Rosie then turned to me and said, “Will, your clothes are a lost cause so I’m going to cut them off of you and then help with a rough cleanup before letting you take a shower.” In a quiet voice, I said, “OK.” Rosie took some scissors out of her pocket and then cut the pants leg of my sweatpants from the waistband all the way down to the cuff. My pants were discarded in a pile between my legs and then she did the same with my underwear. She grabbed a bunch of large wet wipes and then began to wipe down my back, butt, legs, and embarrassingly my genitals too. She let my hospital gown fall back to my knees again and then said, “Let's go into the bathroom so that you can get into the shower.” I followed Rosie into the bathroom with flushed cheeks and she started the shower, then said, “Alright Will, there is soap and shampoo in the shower already, towels and washcloths are right here,” pointing to the towel rack beside the shower, “you can leave your gown on the floor and I will have another gown and socks for you on the counter waiting for you by the time you are done.” I nodded with my cheek still flushed from what was one of the most embarrassing moments of my adult life. Rosie walked out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. I immediately stripped out of the gown and threw it on the floor, then pulled my socks off and threw them on top of the gown. Testing the water with my right hand, I stepped into the shower once the temperature was warm enough. I let the water cascade down my body as I watch as slightly brown water goes down the drain. Once the water was relatively clear, I took a washcloth and soap and scrubbed my body thoroughly from the neck down. Once the soap was rinsed off, I turned the water off and grabbed a towel to dry off. Stepping out of the shower, I see that Rosie has left the new gown and socks on the counter. I put the gown on and struggled to tie the ties in the back. After finally getting the gown on right, I sit on the toilet seat lid to put on my socks. I stepped out of the bathroom to see that my parents made it here. My dad walked up to me with a pair of folded pajama bottoms and underwear, and said, “Well, I always said you were full of crap when you were a teenager, but I never meant literally.” My mom quickly shouted, “George!” Smiling at my dad trying to make light of an embarrassing situation, I said, “I'm surprised that my eyes haven’t turned brown yet.” With a chuckle, he handed me the pajamas and underwear, and I turned back around to head into the bathroom. Closing the door, I slipped on the underwear and as I was trying to guide my feet into the pajamas, I lost my balance. Like a sack of potatoes, I landed straight on my left shoulder and yelled out in pain, “MOTHERFUCKER!” As I am lying on the floor in pain, my dad comes rushing into the bathroom. “Will, are you alright!” my dad said in a scared voice. In an angry voice, I said, “Yeah, I just lost my damn balance trying to get dressed.” “Let me help you and get you into bed,” my dad said. My dad then put a hand under each of my armpits and lifted me from the floor to my feet. He then helped me pull my pajama bottoms up to my waist. We walked out of the bathroom with my dad having one of his arms wrapped around my torso, guiding me to the bed. Looking at the bed, I see that the covers are pulled back and there is an incontinence pad lying over the fitted sheet. Thinking to myself, ‘I guess they don’t want to chance it after my grand entrance,’ I get into bed and pull the covers over me, hearing a slight crinkle from the pad as I shift around to get comfortable. I looked around the hospital room and saw that it was not much different than the room at St. Luke’s. The room is a little bigger, and there is a couch that is up against the windows to my left, a recliner directly to my left that my mom is sitting in, and a straight-back chair to my right. As my dad was taking a seat on the couch, my mom said to me, “Will, I know you are not having a good day today. I just wanted to let you know that I called the math department and spoke to someone named Amy. I let her know what was going on and that you were at the Mayo Clinic. She said that she would talk to all your professors and let them know. She also told me not to worry about your assistantship either. Depending on how long it takes for you to get better, she said that we could do a medical withdrawal and you can return either this summer or fall if need be.” With a sigh of relief, I said, “OK,” pausing for a second, I asked, “What are you doing about work?” “I’m taking PTO right now, but if I have to, I can file for FMLA and get up to 12 weeks off. But don’t worry about me and since your father retired early last year, we plan on staying here until you are better. I already got Stanley to check on the house for us and get the mail. Just worry about you right now. OK,” my mom said. “OK,” I said. A few minutes later, Rosie walked in carrying a bag of fluids, a bag for my feeding tube, and a couple of syringes. Setting everything down on a small table to my left, she said, “Will, I’m going to start your noon feeding and start you back on fluids. How are your pain levels right now?” “The morphine is starting to wear off and it probably doesn’t help that I fell on my shoulder early,” I said. With a look of concern, she said, “You fell, what were you doing to fall?” I said, “I was trying to get dressed and lost my balance.” She then said, “I will be right back,” and walked out of the room. A minute later, Rosie was walking back in. “Will, with you falling earlier, I am going to have to classify you as a fall-risk patient. Can I see your left hand?” I held out my left hand and Rosie put a bright yellow plastic bracelet around my wrist with the words ‘FALL RISK’ written boldly on it. Rosie then said, “Please make sure someone is with you anytime you need to get out of bed. If your parents are not here, please press the call button and someone will be here as soon as possible.” I said, “OK.” Rosie then turned to my parents and said, “Please make sure you help Will with getting dressed, or me or another nurse could help. We do not want him to get hurt.” My mom responded, “Of course, his father will help from now on.” Rosie turned her attention back to the table of supplies and started to hang the I.V. fluid bag and feeding bag. She hooked the fluids to my I.V. and connected the feeding bag to my feeding tube. She then took the two syringes and injected them into my I.V. After throwing the two empty syringes away, Rosie said, “Your team of doctors should be seeing you in a couple of hours. Let me know if you need anything in the meantime.” On that note she walked out of the room and with the morphine taking full effect, I fell asleep. I woke up to my mom lightly shaking my shoulder and saying, “The doctors are here to see you.” I look at the foot of my bed and see three doctors. The first one is a woman who looks to be in her late thirties with long blonde hair and blue eyes. The second doctor is a tall man in his early forties, that looks to be Indian with short black hair and brown eyes. The third doctor is a short man with balding brown hair and brown eyes, that looks to be in his fifties. The Indian doctor spoke first and said, “I’m Dr. Kutner and I specialize in diagnostic medicine.” Pointing to the woman on his right, he said, “This is Dr. Cameron and she specializes in autoimmune diseases.” Pointing to the man on his left, he said, “And this is Dr. Taub and he specializes in genetics.” Dr. Cameron then asked, “Will, we have been reviewing your case and would like for you to go over your symptoms with us again.” I then spend the next ten minutes going over all my symptoms and what has happened to me over the past week. Dr. Kutner then said, “I'm going to do a physical exam of you, is that alright?” I said, “Sure.” He proceeded to listen to my heart and lungs and poke and prod all over my body. At the same time, Dr. Taub turned to my parents and said, “You all must be Will’s parents?” My mom responded, “Yes I’m Elana, and this is his father, George.” Dr. Taub said, “I wish we could be meeting under better circumstances, but it is nice to meet you all.” Dr. Kutner, now finishing his exam, stepped back and said, “Will, I not seeing anything abnormal in your physical exam and your lymph nodes feel normal which confirms that we are still most likely not dealing with an infection.” My dad asked, “What is the plan for figuring this out?” Dr. Kutner said, “We plan on drawing some blood samples today to begin running tests. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day for Will. He will have a full body CT scan and X-ray done, to see if anything changed since his last. He will also have an MRI of some key areas of his body and I will be performing a biopsy on a few of his joints tomorrow afternoon.” Dr. Cameron followed up with, “With the blood samples, I will start looking at other types of autoimmune diseases that Dr. Wilson could have missed and with tomorrow's tests, could shed light on which direction we should be looking in.” “With one of the blood samples, I will start sequencing Will’s DNA, and see if there are any genetic abnormalities that pop up. Hopefully, if there is anything to find, we can find it quickly, but with how large the human genome is, it could take some time,” Dr Taub said. “I will be supporting both Dr. Cameron and Dr. Taub, but I also will be exploring other avenues in trying to diagnose what is causing your symptoms. Do you have any questions?” Dr. Kutner said. I said, “No.” “Get some rest, Will, we will see you tomorrow,” Dr. Kutner replied. As they were walking out of my room, my mom said, “I feel better already after meeting the doctors.” My dad then said, “Yeah, it seems like they have a game plan together and are attacking this from all angles. How do you feel, Will?” I said, “Better, I still hope they figure this out quickly.” A moment later Rosie walked in carrying a caddy of empty vials, and what looked to be a needle and tourniquet. Walking over to the right side of my bed, she sat the caddy on the bed beside me and said, “Will, it seems that the doctors want a lot of blood samples, I’m going to draw blood from your right arm, OK.” I nodded and held out my arm and Rosie tied the tourniquet around my upper arm and began to draw vial after vial until the whole caddy was full of blood samples. After throwing the used needle and tourniquet away, Rosie said, “That should be the last of the blood samples that they would need today. I will be back at 6 to start the last of your feeding for the day and give you more morphine if you need it. Let me know if you need anything else before then.” Rosie walked out of my room with the caddy in hand and it did not take me long to fall back asleep. I woke up twice before the night, one to go to the bathroom with the help of my dad, and the other to get more morphine and the last feeding of the day. I fell back to sleep shortly after getting the morphine. I woke up to it being dark outside and my joints screaming in agony.

Hi guys! I have kind of a weird question. Does anybody miss when they were little and their Mommy or Daddy could just lift their legs up with one hand and wipe their bottom and then slide a new diaper underneath their bottom during a diaper change and tape it up nice and tight afterwards? I've come to realize that the older I've gotten, the more I miss little things like that. That must be me channeling my inner 11 month old baby. So I'm curious, Does anybody feel the same way?

Chapter 23: The Little That I Know Three Years Ago I now knew for certain that there were no pull-ups or diapers in the house. All I had managed to find were a bunch of Jackson's old baby items, but pacifiers and bottles held no interest for me. I may have wanted to wear diapers, but I didn't have the slightest interest in behaving like or being treated as a baby. There was so much that I didn't know and very few means of attaining the information that I sought. My fixation on pull-ups ebbed and flowed for the following year after I first learned about those bedwetting pull-ups from my cousins. It wasn't as though there was any point where I didn't want to try to wear one, but without any actual ability to do so, the desire would fade out of mind for weeks or months at a time until something would occur to spark those urges again. I would catch a glimpse of an advertisement for diapers on the TV or in a newspaper. I would be at the park when a toddler would run by with the waistband of a pull-up clearly sticking out the top of their shorts. I would overhear some of my mom's friends talking about struggles they had with getting their toddlers to potty train. And then my mind would be back at it again, fruitlessly searching for information until I once again gave up hope of ever getting my hands on pull-ups of my own. <><><> My mom kept me close at hand when we went shopping for groceries. Jackson was still young enough to sit in the cart, facing Mom as she pushed it down most – but not all – of the aisles in the grocery store. To my dismay, there were a number of aisles that we never seemed to go by anymore, ones that I wished I had paid more attention to previously but that had been before I had known what I wanted to look for. Slipping off to check out the baby aisle was never an option. Mom preferred that I stay within arm's reach of her at all times. I had to make do with attempting to discreetly peek down the baby aisle as we went by, taking in its distinct scents. But it was hard to make out much from a distance. There were so many brands and styles, and I wasn't sure exactly what I was looking for. That changed one day right at the end of summer break, several months since my interest in pull-ups had begun. One of my mom's co-workers was having a baby shower for her first baby, which she was expecting in a couple of months, and Mom needed to pick out some diapers and wipes as a present. I found myself standing smack dab in the middle of the diaper section of the baby aisle, completely overwhelmed by all the options, brands, and styles. All the bright colors and smells made it hard to concentrate on what I was looking for. I needed to find something that was meant for older kids my age, not toddlers or preschoolers. There were regular diapers and pull-ups and ones that seemed to be a mix of the two. On a few of the other packages where information about the sizing was available, it was again clear that none of the products were remotely close to my size, as if that wasn't clear from the age of the models on the front of the packages. I began to wonder if that scene with my cousins a few months back had actually been real. Could it have just been something that I dreamed up in the boredom of that vacation? Then I saw a package. There was a picture of a sleeping girl on it, more than old enough to be my age. Could that be it? But then I saw the phrase "nighttime underwear" beneath the brand name. That didn't make any sense to me. Why would they be selling underwear for girls in the baby aisle? That was just plain silly. "Maddy," Mom said. "You need to keep up with us." While I wanted to see if there was any other information to glean from the package, I didn't have any choice but to obey Mom as I turned around and dashed ahead to catch up to her shopping cart. What exactly did that package mean by "nighttime underwear," and why was it located in the baby aisle close to all the diapers and pull-ups? It would be a long time before I walked through the baby aisle again. <><><> An indoor water park in the winter made for a perfect vacation. Grace was busy lying on her stomach on one of the poolside chairs. Teenagers were weird. It wasn't like she could catch a tan inside. Mom was at least reading a book while reclining in her chair. Dad was munching on some snacks, keeping an eye on Jackson and me from off in the distance. I was playing with Jackson in the kiddie pool. The warm water only came up to our ankles, but there were tons of fountains, sprinklers, slides, and water toys to play with. Above us was a bucket connected to a swivel. It gradually filled with water before tipping over and emptying its contents onto whoever might be unlucky enough to be standing beneath it at the time. Jackson found the idea hilarious. Though for him it was more amusing when the bucket of water was dropping down on my head rather than his. I knew better than to look up to try to see if the bucket was close to overflowing. I had made that mistake once and wasn't interested in making it again. At this point, my hair was already thoroughly soaked, so there was no use in fussing over yet another bucket of water pouring over it again. The small clang the bucket made as it began to tip was the only warning I got. I closed my eyes and shut my mouth as the warm water – at least it was warm water – poured over my head. I opened my eyes to the sight of Jackson giggling and pointing at me like a maniac. "OK, it's your turn now," I said. I stepped away from the spot under the basket and motion for Jackson to take my place. It seemed to take the bucket a little under a minute to refill before soaking its next victim. But my eyes drifted away from Jackson. Her top was a normal swimsuit, but around her waist was an uncovered swim diaper, blue with a picture of a mermaid on it. It was absolutely mesmerizing. Jackson yelled at me to pay attention to him, and when I looked again in the direction the girl had run off in, I had lost sight of her. I knew that I wouldn't fit in a swim diaper made for a baby, but the site of the swim diaper still stirred up that longing that had gotten tucked away for a couple of months. Since that disappointing trip through the baby aisle, my interest in diapers had dropped off. With diapers on my mind again, I couldn't help but notice them everywhere I went at the water park, and over the course of the long weekend, I spent much more time playing with Jackson than I normally would have, much to the delight of Grace and my parents. It wasn't so much that I cared to spend time around my brother, but being in the kiddie pool gave me a chance to catch glimpses of diapered kids as they splashed around in the water, wishing all the while that it was me who was wearing those diapers and pull-ups instead. <><><> I learned not to leave the room during commercial breaks. I didn't care much about the cartoon show that my brother was watching on TV. I found it difficult to concentrate on my book with all of that background noise. Ever since coming home from the water park vacation, I had been obsessed with learning as much as I could about pull-ups and diapers, and I had discovered an easy way to do so. I endured the annoying shows my younger brother watched for one, and only one, reason. The programs geared toward kids his age often featured advertisements for pull-ups and diapers. I had become familiar with the names of all the brands and the different types of pull-ups and diapers they would sell, and all the new features they were constantly adding. I peeked at the TV over the top of the book I was reading. A new commercial break had just begun. The first two advertisements were disappointments. The first was for a cereal brand I absolutely detested. The second was for baby formula. A few commercial breaks had passed by already without any of the advertisements I had been looking for, and I was beginning to wish I had just spent the morning reading in my room instead when the next ad caught my eye. One of the brands I was familiar with was advertising a new type of pull-up. A boy and a girl around Jackson's age were both going through the routine of getting ready for bed with their parent's assistance. There was the familiar scene of the closeup shot of them sliding the pull-up over their waists. And then the lights went out, and the designs on the pull-ups were glowing in the dark. But I knew by now not to get my hopes up. The kids in the advertisement were Jackson's age. No matter how cool those pull-ups looked, they weren't for me, either. The ad continued by showing how to activate the pull-ups first by holding them under a light. The advertisement was over all too soon, and Jackson's show resumed. But instead of turning back to my book, I thought over again about what I had just seen. This didn't confirm that the pull-ups I remembered my cousins' wearing were real, but it did confirm one important detail. There were pull-ups made specifically for use during the night. I wondered again about the brand of nighttime underwear that I had seen in the diaper aisle nearly half a year ago. There was a word I had learned in class the other day. It was really long, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to remember how to spell it. The concept of the word – euphemism – was also hard to grasp, and the idea that a word might not mean what it actually meant was simply too confusing. It didn't seem right. It was so much easier when people simply said exactly what they meant, rather than the opposite of it. But it was like a lightbulb had gone off in my head. Could nighttime underwear actually mean something entirely else? I tried to recall the name of the brand I had seen that day in the baby aisle. It took several minutes for it to come back to me. I had to recite the alphabet silently in my head several times before I remembered it. I whispered the name of the brand silently to myself over and over again, like a mantra. With the name of what I was looking for now in mind, I kept my eyes peeled for any glimpse of it, but several more months passed by without any additional luck. I managed to catch a glimpse or two – or at least thought I had – of the packages of so-called nighttime underwear in the baby aisle. But that was only for seconds and from a long distance, so I wasn't able to glean any more information than from the time I had spent first looking at it. My remaining options were highly limited. There was absolutely no scenario in which I would look up that brand on the family computer or tablet. I couldn't have my parents question why I was seeking out that information. I knew instinctively that they would not approve of this quest. There was no way that query would escape Dad's notice, and I had no desire for the questions that would surely follow. And despite my continued vigilance in watching ads on the TV, I never managed to come across one for that nighttime underwear. <><><> About a year had passed now since the day I had worn pull-ups My biggest fear was that I was growing. I was quite a few inches taller than a year before. I wanted to believe that they made pull-ups for teenagers, but without any direct evidence to confirm that, my worry was that I would eventually get my hands on the bedwetting pull-ups, only to find that I had done so too later and would no longer be able to fit into them. I was once again on the alert for any information I could find about that nighttime underwear brand. It was a week after my tenth birthday. To celebrate, I had gone with Emma and Angie to an indoor trampoline park. I had put the thought of those pull-ups out of my mind for a while, as I hadn't recently come across any new information. The allure of the TV advertisements had faded. It was just the same old information re-packaged in different ways. Yes, I would still look up at the TV at the familiar sound of certain jingles, but I no longer went out of the way to stay in the living room as Jackson watched the TV. The smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies wafted upward through the air and to the second floor of the house. I followed the irresistible scent downstairs as it grew stronger and stronger until I came across a bunch of cookies spread out on old pages of yesterday's newspaper on the dining room table. To my disappointment, my parents only got the newspaper on Sunday. Mom said the only reasons she got it at all was for the advertisements that came tucked inside it, though all I cared about was pulling out the comics section from the middle, often wishing that I would be able to get the comics from the middle of the week as well. Mom was in the kitchen, putting one final batch of cookies in the oven. She gave me permission to eat two – and only two – cookies. I stared down at the newspaper pages as I tried to determine which two cookies were the biggest. None of the newspaper articles carried any interest to me. Reading the news was something that adults did. However, the newspaper pages also included a section with advertisements for the local grocery store that Mom preferred to shop at. There were ads for a variety of baby products. I glanced over at them, not really expecting to learn anything that I already didn't know. There were headings for different products that were on sale: wipes, formula, diapers, and pull-ups. I turned my attention to the images in the pull-up sections, which, according to the ad, were on sale for fifteen percent off this week. And there it was. The picture was tiny, but unmistakable. It was the same package of nighttime underwear that I had come across so long ago in the grocery store. And there was no mistaking what it actually was. It couldn't have been an accident that it had been listed in the pull-ups section. I squinted down at the newspaper as I removed a couple of cookies and put them on my plate. There was some tiny writing on the package, but it was indecipherable with how small the picture was. The text next to the advertisement said that the sale included small through extra-large sizes, but I knew better than to let that phrase get my hopes up. I had seen a couple of ads for extra-large pull-ups before, only to find that this just meant they were for preschool-age kids and not toddlers. I poured myself a glass of milk in the kitchen and slowly ate my cookie while considering this new revelation. I realized that the most important thing I had learned wasn't that these nighttime underwear were actually pull-ups. That was a discovery I had made on my own a few months back. No, what I realized was that there was another potential untapped source of information about these pull-ups. From then on, I made sure to skim through all the advertisements in the newspaper. These special bedwetting pull-ups didn't show up often, but each time they did, the same problem remained as before. The information contained in the ads was minimal, with nothing to suggest whether I would still be able to fit into these pull-ups or if I had already outgrown them in the past year. There wasn't any information about the weight ranges or clothing sizes that the pull-ups would fit. But with the confirmation that these pull-ups existed, I found it impossible to put the topic out of my mind. After that moment, not a single day passed where I didn't think about what it would be like to be wearing a pull-up once again. But actually getting my hands on one of those pull-ups seemed like an impossibility for the time being. It wasn't likely that I would be visiting those cousins anytime again soon, and I didn't know of a single other kid my age who was a bedwetter. It was time to take matters into my own hands. If I couldn't get a diaper of my own, perhaps I could make one for myself. --- Links to all my stories can be found at https://abdlwriter.wordpress.com/

Not since I bought the ball gag.

You've answered your own question: Burning “good” in the pursuit of “better” is a risky strategy 🤣 In my more cynical moments (and my baseline level of cynicism is fairly high to being with) I suspect that the secret to a successful marriage is low expectations. Whilst I myself know for a fact that I am a tungsten monument to perfection 🤣, I accept that my befuddled beloved may misconstrue her bedazzlement at my wonder as flaws on my part and yet she (largely) overlooks them. For my part, I’ve learned to accept that there are aspects to her that will simply never, ever improve. For example, irrespective of lecture, learnings or lived experience, she has zero mechanical sympathy for any device that she uses and consequentially is continually breaking stuff (cue the standard disclaimers: “It just fell off”, “It was like that when I found it” and “Why does everything bad that happens have to be my fault?”) We put up with each other’s imperfections and look at the relationship in terms of its overall balance sheet. If we’d expected an uninterrupted “hearts and flowers” frolic through a field of perpetual nirvana-like state of bliss the union would have carked it on the first rubbish bin night. The nappies are a huge number in the "debit" column however. She’ll trash a washing machine and a mattress every year and nymphomania sounds like a lot of work to me 🤣 Well it's a bit better if you're not the only idiot on the special bus to crazy town 🤣 I'm trying very hard not to regret it but my beloved has other ideas.

Chapter 109: Throw “YEAH? I NEEDED to get back here in time?” I said, feeling exposed and embarrassed in front of my former nest mother right then. “Well, you’re here, and I’m in luck that I get to change a much prettier Little than I usually do!” She picked me up before I could warn her about me probably leaking but quickly carried me to a small changing room on the first floor I didn’t know existed. She used one hand to unfold a disposable changing pad. She placed it on the metal changing table and laid me on it. “You soaked through your onesie and skirt,” she said as she flipped it up. “Here, sit up for a second,” she told me. I rolled upward, and a second later, she pulled the jumper over my head and then the onesie to leave me only in the sagging and soaked diaper. “Umm… what am I going to wear?” I asked her nervously. “Don’t worry, we keep a few spare things in here for this type of emergency,” she assured me. “Let’s get you out of that soggy diapee first, though!” I really felt that Lilly did a better job of changing my diapers. However, Mackenzie was still better than several changers I’d had. She was gentle, wiped me thoroughly, and dressed me in a spare diaper from my backpack. “You don’t have a spare outfit in there, do you?” I blushed, “I used it this week already?” “That’s fine, we’ll just use a spare shirt here,” she told me. I watched her dig through a bin for a moment before coming out with what looked like a simple pink sweater at first. Once she pulled it over my head, I realized the arms had several rows of ruffles by the wrist. Even with the top being too large, it barely covered much more than the top of my diaper! “Sorry, no leggings or pants; we’ll just have to get you up to your nest. You’re wearing a diaper anyway,” Mackenzie told me as if that excused my nude legs! “Let’s just get up there quickly?” I asked. She smiled, picked me up, bounced me up and down, and then carried me out of the room. The temperature in the lobby area felt like it dropped thirty degrees from an open door to the outside. Several other Littles were coming from a common area on the first floor then and seemed to all stare for a second before looking away. I blushed and felt like my face was probably as hot as the sun! Fortunately, the elevator trip, plus her long legs, had me to my new nest pretty quickly. “Hi Mackenzie! Did you catch a stray of mine?” “This fish wasn’t in the water, but I thought I’d bring her to you?” “Thanks! Looks like she had a wardrobe issue - what did you do with her wet clothes?” “Here,” she said, handing her a clear bag. “I almost just put them in the laundry chute, but since you kidnapped her from me, I figured we’d make sure they knew the clothes belonged to your nest.” Mackenzie hugged me, “It’s good to see you, Carly! I’ll make sure I get down here to see you some other time. Be good for Miss Lilly!” She placed me on the ground, patted my exposed diaper, and walked out. Lilly giggled at me, and I noticed Ava and Mia looked like they couldn’t decide whether to laugh at me or feel bad. For my part, I just walked to my stuff and found a pair of black leggings. It wasn’t worth changing the top in my mind when I’d be putting on pajamas in a little bit. I had to admit with leggings on to cover my bottom half, I was pretty comfortable since the borrowed top was really soft! I found myself working on homework and trying to get ready for one of my first tests that was coming up on HoloTheory the next day. I had a good, solid grasp of all of the material so far, but I wanted to review all of the new terms and jargon that were used in the class. By the time I’d also done some brief studying for my intelligence class and math, it was nearly three hours after I’d returned. I stood up to walk to find Lilly for a needed diaper change before calling it a night! BETH WAS BLUSHING as she entered the dorm. She quickly sucked her coat off so she didn’t have to worry about anyone wondering about it. She folded the wet spot inside after taking a quick sniff and noting there was a residue of Carly on it. She groaned, and Nikki gave her a little smirk as she traveled up the stairs to the dorm. “Why don’t I take your coat? I’ll wash it at my apartment tonight?” “I can just put it in the laundry here?” Beth started to say. “You know the laundry is analyzed, right?” “Huh?” Nikki shook her head, “You’re so smart on some things, kid…?” “What do you mean?” “Someone about fifteen years ago figured out when they installed the auto laundry features for the dorm that they could also be clever and make sure no one was hiding bedwetting from them?” “You mean…?” “Yes, if you have any clothing in the wash that has a too-high urine concentration, you’ll be closely watched.” With a sigh, Beth handed her the coat, “Thanks for washing it then…” “Do you have another in case it doesn’t dry tonight?” Beth nodded, “It’s supposed to be a bit warmer tomorrow anyway, so I would probably have switched to a different one anyway.” “Good,” she told her. “This date tomorrow?” Beth blushed and smiled at the same time, “Yes?” “Would you mind if I triple-checked Carly’s plans? I don’t want to overstep, but I also want to make sure it’s a safe trip for you.” She did indeed feel a bit smothered by that but nodded anyway. “Sure, it seems like she did a decent amount of work trying to plan it already?” “I’m sure she did, knowing her family. No need to risk her missing something, though!” “Fair enough,” she said. “You’re not going anywhere else for the night?” Beth shook her head, “I have a test tomorrow in calculus I need to finish studying for.” “Okay, I’ll see you in the morning then,” she told her. “See you tomorrow,” Beth said, closing the door behind her and latching the deadbolt shut. She sighed, squeezing herself in a little hug, then changed into a comfy pair of pajama pants and a light purple top with a circuit diagram on it. Lance had given it to her for Christmas, and she appreciated its nerdiness. Dressed more comfortably, she pulled out her tablet and the review guide that her professor had kindly provided their class for the test the next day. She was about to the point of screaming about one problem when her phone suddenly rang. She stood, found it, and when she saw it was her mom, she answered with the holoprojection function, placing it on the desk in front of it. “Hi, Mom,” she said. “How are you doing, Sweetie?” She shrugged, “Ready to throw my tablet of calc work into the wall?” “That sounds normal,” her mom laughed. “The only person I know who didn’t absolutely hate that class was your dad.” Beth shook her head, “Carly is just as bad!” “How is she taking everything?” “Huh?” “The fact she’s stuck as a girl?” Her mom said. “Oh, that…” “That? It was supposed to be a temporary thing for the film? Surely she’s a bit upset, at least, at being stuck as a girl? Your dad would have been devastated?” Beth nodded, “Carly is fine with it, Mom. Actually, she’s better than fine with it, I think.” Her mom gave her the stare that always felt like she was opening her brain up and stripping out the knowledge from it, “She wanted to be a girl?” Beth sighed, “Yeah, I think so?” “Well, what about your relationship now?” Beth shrugged, “Seems fine still?” “You’re okay with going out with a girl?” Her mom asked. “You never seemed like you had a thing for girls before?” Beth shook her head, “I don’t have a thing for girls in general; it’s just Carly?” Her mom cajoled her into more information as their conversation went on about things she would never discuss with her dad. Eventually, she made her excuses and said, “I need to finish studying; give everyone my love?” As the line cut, Beth felt more drained and relieved to have spoken with her mother. Looking at the clock, she decided to hit the restroom and resume her studying. When she was past the point of getting anywhere, she went to the restroom again to clean her face and brush her teeth before climbing into bed and being tucked in by Rachel, who seemed to suddenly appear at bedtime each night. “Good night,” Rachel told her as she turned off the lights. I WOKE UP the following day with a swim with Lilly and Mackenzie before finding my way to breakfast and classes. Computational Intelligence was interesting that morning. I made some notes on some ideas I wasn’t sure Mom knew about yet! Our professor was currently involved in some research that furthered Grandma’s work in the field, and she was making some impressive gains in how the AI chunked new knowledge. Her thinking patterns seemed to be heavily influenced by her own kids’ development, which I found kind of intriguing! I walked to my Holofield Theory class and crammed a few last minutes of studying before the room was packed. Our professor passed out the same style of tablet we’d taken our placement tests on that first week. I appreciated that I was given a smaller one than my neighbors, though! “You have the full class time for this exam. We can work with you if you need additional time, but in my experience, you either know this material or you don’t,” Professor Davis told us. I nodded. To me, this was more of a memory subject than a ‘work it out’ subject like math or programming. “Just one other note, due to some issues I’ve had before, I would ask that you please not leave the room until after you complete the exam. You’re welcome to go before I activate the test and come back if you need to use the restroom, but I’ll collect your tests otherwise if you need to leave.” I squirmed at that, wishing that going to the bathroom was even a realistic possibility for me! “Well, at least I can just go…” I thought to myself even as several girls excused themselves from class, and one boy then. My diaper was a little damp, but I was pretty sure it would hold up until lunch based on how little I’d drank that morning. “Okay, I’m going to activate your tests now; they’ll start when they return. Good luck!” Immediately, my screen lit up, and I began working on answering questions about a subject that would have sounded like gibberish to me a few weeks ago! BETH HAD SPENT the morning when she woke up doing some last-minute cramming. She’d even made Carly quiz her on a couple of formulas before leaving her at her first class and heading to her own. During her Logic class, she discovered there would be a project due in that class in another week as one of her five grades. Fortunately, it seemed straightforward and not too time-consuming! Her professor annoyingly went over time by a few minutes. Since she was sitting inside a row, there wasn’t a good and tactful way to leave until he finished! She was a little worried that Carly wasn’t waiting for her or at her classroom until she checked her message and realized she’d hurried to her next class to cram for her own test. “Everything okay?” Nikki asked her. “Yeah, just was a little nervous for a second that Carly wasn’t here. She has a test in her next class, though, so she hurried there to do some last studying.” “I don’t miss being in school,” Nikki told her as she walked beside her. Beth laughed, “Aren’t you basically back in school now since you’re with me all the time?” She looked up at Nikki, who made a cringing face like she’d smelled something bad. “Well, at least I’m not taking the tests?” “Don’t remind me!” Beth said. She had to appreciate that the chill of winter had taken a break that day. It wasn’t nearly as cold as it had been the past couple of weeks. “I wonder if this warm weather is going to last long?” Nikki asked as if reading her thoughts. Beth shrugged, “Not sure, I was thinking that though? It’s been frigid the past couple of weeks!” They didn’t have much more time to talk before Beth led them into Marconi Hall and down the hallway to the small lecture hall where her class was held. She took a quick moment to detour into the restroom first and thought, ‘I hope Carly’s diaper lasts through this class?’ Once she sat in her class, she took a moment to pull out her notes again for her calculus exam. When her professor began class, she couldn’t help but note that it would be a long day before they wrapped up! “Okay, don’t forget that we have a test next Friday in this class…” he droned on as Beth made a note in her calendar about yet another test in the next couple of weeks! ‘Classes don’t seem so bad at the beginning, but then they just start piling up tests and projects!’ she griped. Her calendar was filling up, and it was still several weeks until midterms! She checked her messages as she left class and was a little concerned that she didn’t see one from Carly. I WAS MAKING quick work of the exam as it went through everything from the absolute basics we’d started with. The first question asked us to describe the particles involved in the projection of just the images. A follow-up question began to ask how you would manipulate the particles, and things continued on in that manner for thirty questions. About question thirty-one, I checked and saw there were a total of sixty, so I was halfway done! I was completing question forty-eight a half-hour later about the proper way to orient the projector lenses when I felt my stomach rumble. ‘Hush, I’ll feed you after this,’ I said, figuring it was just hunger since lunchtime was coming. Question fifty-three was a more theoretical-based question and asked about the proper formula for calculating the intersection of the particles of light with the stasis field you needed to generate. Fortunately, I remembered the formula, so I was writing it with the stylus even as I felt my body give off a little bit of gas in a fart. “Gross!” I heard someone complain a row away. I blushed but continued to work. ‘I hate that I don’t have any control over anything now!’ I thought to myself. The only warning I had before something happened now was when my body would decide to crouch, seemingly on its own. ‘Hopefully, it holds off until after this test!’ I grimaced a moment after finishing the fifty-fourth question as my insides seemed to twist some, but then there was a sense of relief in my body. I finished fifty-six before I heard, “Did someone just poop themselves?” From a girl a couple rows back. “Ladies and gentlemen, you must remain quiet through this exam. I will not warn you again.” “Professor, how can we concentrate when there’s a poopy-pants here?” The girl pushed back. “Breathe through your mouth,” he suggested and glared at her. I pointed my eyes back at my paper, but not before noticing he looked straight at me with a sympathetic glance. “Can I at least change her diaper?” The girl asked. “I’m sure it’s not comfy for her, and it’ll at least move the smell away from us?” “I told you, no one can leave the room?” He said, and I sensed he was trying to make excuses. “She’s just a Little, I’ll change her behind your desk?” “I don’t…” I felt a nervous feeling in my stomach, but I also knew it was kind of rude to force people to smell my poopy diaper for the rest of the test. “Fine,” I said, “I have a spare diaper in my bag. Are you sure you want to?” I looked up at a tall brown-haired girl who smiled, “Sure!” The girl clambered down the steps and had me in her arms almost before I was ready. “By the way, I’m Harper,” she told me. “Carly,” I said quietly. She nearly pushed Professor Davis to move out of the way, and I was at least grateful the room had been set up like a regular lecture hall that day. That meant a large desk in the front of the room blocked the view of anyone seated in the rows. “Do you have a changing pad?” She asked me quietly as she sat me down. I blushed, but I dug through my bag and handed her the changing pad, a diaper, and some wipes. “Well, at least you’re a prepared little girl!” She patted my back, “Let’s get you out of that icky poopy diapee!” “Please keep quiet,” Professor Davis asked. “I’m just changing her diaper?” “Quietly,” he insisted. She shook her head and unfolded my changing pad, then laid me down on it before pushing the skirt up and out of the way. With a few pops, the onesie was opened up, and then she tickled my stomach for no reason. I fought back a few giggles, “Please don’t?” “Fine…” she said. “Don’t get your panties in a twist… oh, you won’t wear those,” she smirked. I couldn’t tell if she was being cruel or just trying to be funny… “Don’t quit your day job,” I groaned. A moment later, she pulled the tapes open and used the used diaper to scrape some of the muck off my butt. “Eew,” she complained a moment later, and I watched her use a baby wipe to wipe her hand up before resuming the cleanup on my bottom. She used quite a few wipes to gently but quickly clean me up. Satisfied, she rolled them up in the old diaper and taped me in the new diaper, buttoned my onesie, then sat me up and handed me the diaper. “Go throw your diapee away in the trash can and get back to your test, sweetie!” I wanted to gag as she handed me the balled-up diaper! I could see brown stains on it, and I did my best not to throw up as I walked it to a trash can by the door. I found my pack of baby wipes in my bag and wiped my hands with one before returning to resume my test. Thirty minutes later, I was grateful to have pressed submit and escaped the room from my classmates! I felt a little guilty as I passed by the trashcan and could clearly still smell the contents! +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Thanks for reading!!!! Please press the 'Like' Button and leave me a comment! The real world is hitting hard right now, and I'm hitting a lot of hours at work beyond normal right now. I'm hoping to get to some more writing on this this weekend so I can get back ahead. I'm being beaten up by my stress enough that we'll see what happens. The good thing is at one post a week I do have 16 more weeks written already, but I would prefer to return to two a week. We'll see what happens, though... Thanks for your patience and understanding!

THE DINER “Sarah, I can't thank you enough for bringing me here.” Ian put his cup down, and settled more deeply into the naugahyde cushion. “Really … I mean … diners like this?” His gaze swept around the dimly lit interior. The chipped formica, the long counter with its ancient stools, the linoleum that had been scrubbed so many times that one could only guess at the original color. He half expected Mel to pop out of the kitchen any second now. And their waitress definitely looked like Linda Lavin. “Mom and Dad … I remember, when I was a kid, eating at places like this when we went on vacation. This brings back some good memories.” Ian's gaze softened, his thoughts drifting back in time to long car rides deep into the night, the brightly lit signs that marked the diners and motels on the outskirts of the small towns on old Route 66. He remembered Tucumcari, the memory that of a small child half asleep in the back seat, struggling to stay awake, imagination fired by the bright lights rushing toward them out of the darkness. “No, Ian … no. I'm the one who should be thanking you.” Gently shaking her head, Sarah leaned forward, trying to keep control of the conversation. There was so much that she wanted to say, and so much more that she wanted to ask. “I was so fed up with that stereo of yours, so angry. I was looking for a confrontation, the louder the better. Next stop the management office, another complaint, this time in writing … I wanted them to evict you!” Sarah was a battle scarred RN, daily suffering the slings and arrows that any large, urban hospital serves up in abundance. Patients were sometimes a pain, but they came and went. Far too many of the doctors were out and out jerks, in it for the money and the endless opportunities to cheat on their wives with the young nurses who seemingly existed only to do their bidding. And those assholes were here to stay. Night after night, Sarah had brought her frustration home with her, to be greeted with the heavy vibration coming through the ceiling from the apartment above her-- a stereo somewhere above her couch, making it impossible for her to relax. Once, she had mounted a stool to pound on the ceiling. She had left notes in the mailbox. She had made a verbal complaint to management, learned that her tormentor was a single male roughly her own age, divorced, a highly educated professional. She was astonished to discover that he was on the faculty of the university she passed every day driving to and from work. And East Asian languages? She had looked up the department's campus address in the phone book. The building was within easy walking distance of her office! Or it would be, she thought, if the city would ever get around to plowing the damned sidewalks! Minnesota winters were not for the faint of heart. She had finally had enough, storming up the stairs to pound on his door. She was completely unprepared for what happened next. . . . . “What the hell?” Ian looked up from the counter, the pounding at the door startling him badly. Slicing up the avocado would have to wait. The good news was that he had somehow managed to keep his fingers out of the blade's line of fire. “Yes?”, he said, easing the door open, not sure what to expect. He looked out at a young woman, about his own age, a bit taller … And if looks could kill, he instantly realized, I'd already be dead! This has got to be the neighbor from Hell! One of the ladies in the office had warned him that there had been a verbal complaint from the RN living below him. It was the same old, same old … turn the stereo down, or was it the TV? Some people simply didn't appreciate Carson's monologue. Too bad, he thought, because we have a Grade A winner here. Nice features, blue eyes, great lips, maybe a natural blonde … Ian's eyes drifted lower, then braked to a halt. Ian was big on foreplay, and this seemingly Scandinavian bombshell was singularly blessed with that asset with which he most enjoyed playing. She reminded him of Bonnie Holbrooke, the blonde beauty with whom he had fallen so deeply in love … in the ninth grade. “Would you puh … lese turn it down, or better yet, turn it off?” Sarah angrily stepped forward, and Ian involuntarily stepped back. Her eyes were on fire, and he had zero desire to get burnt. Still, genuinely puzzled, Ian glanced over his shoulder. Yes, the stereo was on, but it was hardly loud … and besides, who didn't like Fleetwood Mac? Lindsey doing the riff on Go Your Own Way? Oh, come, on! Ian hated confrontation. “Would you like to come in,” he asked in a subdued voice. It was hard not to fall to his knees and beg for forgiveness. Migraines had played a part in the collapse of his marriage, conditioned him to surrender rather than fight for his convictions. And the more readily he gave in, the more shrill his ex's voice had become. His last migraine had erupted four days after their separation. “I was just making dinner,” he added, “and I have a bottle of wine decanting. Please, let me pour you a glass, and, uh, if you haven't eaten, I'm preparing tacos. Do you, uh, do you like Mexican food?” Ian's nervousness was on full display. He was acutely aware of the bulk between his legs, and could only pray that his diaper and baby pants wouldn't leak. . . . . Sarah could only gape, feeling the anger leech out of her. In her imagination, her unseen neighbor was just another jerk, some Neanderthal who would happily join her in making a scene, and to hell with his professional credentials. Doctors had plenty of credentials, and the fancy degrees hanging on their office walls didn't keep most of them from being jerks. It briefly occurred to her that he might be playing her, deftly turning the tables to throw her off balance. Well, if that's his game, it's definitely working! But wait … no … this can't be an act. No one's this good. Oh, God, Sarah, he's just some nice, ordinary guy, and you … you … guess what, you're the only jerk on the premises! God, he probably thinks I'm going to kick him in the balls, or something. Sarah's eyes drifted lower, then braked to a halt. Over the past ten years she had changed thousands of adult diapers, and there was absolutely no doubt in her mind. The bulge was such a giveaway, and then there was the truck from the diaper service, making its weekly pick-up and drop-off at a building in an adults only complex. The two pieces fit so neatly together: she had to be standing face to face with their customer. She idly wondered where he kept his diaper pail, wondered whether his bathroom reeked of stale urine, or worse. And the $64,000 question: is he incontinent, or does he have some kind of weird diaper fetish? No, he has to be a freak, has to be, because he's too young to have … and besides, this is the second floor, and there's no elevator, no way to get down in a wheelchair and, and, no crutches in the hallway. I would have noticed, and … and ... As her preconceptions shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, a new and very different pattern began to emerge from the wreckage in Sarah Haikkonen's mind. He's got to be about my age. Thirty-one, thirty-two, something like that. He's the right age and, and, East Asian languages? Oh, dear God! Sarah took a deep breath, and slowly released it, hoping that he would misinterpret what he was seeing, hoping that he would think she was letting go of her anger. She had spent the first two years of her career at the Veteran's hospital out by the airport, the biggest in the state, but she had fled to the city because she wasn't hard enough, couldn't cope with the despair that awaited her every time she started her rounds. It wasn't the wounds, well, not the physical wounds at any rate. She was trained for that, and for the most part the young men in her care wanted physically to get better, wanted to get on with their lives. No, it was the emotional wounds, the psychic, that she had seen in the eyes of too many men her own age-- men who had come home to be spat upon by their neighbors, men who had come home to be called baby killers. She was badly out of her depth, and so she had fled. There was a question that Sarah desperately wanted to ask ... but how to ask it? “Thank you, um?” “Ian … Ian Grady. And you are ...” “Sarah … Sarah Haikkonen.” “Finnish?” “That's right,” she smiled, “from a long and not particularly illustrious line of Haikkonen's in the U.P. And yes, Ian, I'd love to share a glass of wine with you. It will,” she nervously laughed, “give me a bit of time to work up a decent apology for my outburst.” “Sarah,” he grinned, “in the immortal words of Chick Hearn, no harm, no foul, so no apology is called for. Oh, granted, the circumstances are a bit unusual, but I am genuinely happy to make your acquaintance.” Ian poured the wine, and they gently clinked glasses. “So, a Lakers fan?” “Die hard,” he grinned. “Ian, there's something else I'd like to ask you. Can I? “Why not? Now that we're old friends,” he teased, “you can ask me anything!” “Well, it's my understanding that you're a professor at the U, teaching East Asian languages?” Ian laughed, and shook his head. “Sorry to disappoint you, Sarah, but I'm just in my first year … on probation, so to speak. A newly minted and poorly paid Ph.D.” “Well, what I really want to know is … do you by any chance … do you speak Vietnamese?” . . . . The apartment mystified her. There was no dining room table, and no chairs. Clearly, Ian ate on the floor. She made a mental note to ask if he was a practicing Buddhist. Two oddly shaped tables in the living room housed the stereo components and a TV; the dreaded speakers were, as she had expected, positioned directly above her own couch. His was a plush, two piece design. It looked very comfortable. She had asked for permission to use the bathroom, and he had agreed without hesitation. She flushed and then washed her hands, but her real objective had been to peek behind the shower curtain. The two pairs of vinyl pants hanging on a makeshift clothes line did not surprise her in the least. The labels confirmed that they were from a highly respected local manufacturer with a nationwide institutional customer base. She risked an even quicker peek into the single bedroom. The king sized bed was predictable, and the diaper pail was right where she had expected to find it. Breathing deeply, she smelled the all too familiar scent of dried urine. What she had smelled in the bathroom was more complex-- the unmistakable mixture of feces and urine. So, she concluded with a slight shake of her head, he may be truly incontinent, both bladder and bowel. And he speaks Vietnamese ... how well we'll be able to judge when I get him to the hospital. And we do desperately need interpreters. Sarah knew that she would have to proceed cautiously. The soldiers at the hospital had all behaved like members of a fraternity, only instead of secret handshakes they seemed bound together by a vow of silence. No one wanted to talk about the battlefield. No one. There was still more that she needed to learn. The bedroom was odd, not for what was there but for what wasn't. No headboard. No dresser. No bedside table. Just a hard sided suitcase standing on end and housing an ugly, gray office lamp-- the sort of lamp that a down and out accountant might use. Was Ian poor, or had he come home to join some cult that demanded a vow of poverty? Oddball cults had sprung up all over the country in recent years, and there was even a nurse in her own unit who had joined some sect out in Oregon. The , times, she grimaced, they are indeed a changing. And then there were the paintings. Ian clearly loved bright, bold colors-- but why on earth would anyone have so graphic a painting of the sea giving up its dead hanging on their living room wall? It was the one thing that gave her pause. Sarah returned to the living room. She wanted Ian to put another record on, and then come downstairs to hear at first hand what she had to put up with night after night. All of her spur of the moment planning to seduce Ian Grady-- a nice, intelligent guy with a bright future and a disability that she could easily tolerate and gently manipulate-- would come to naught if she couldn't get a decent night's sleep. . . . . Ian sighed deeply, and turned to face her, palms up in the classic gesture of surrender. “I'm sorry, Sarah. It never occurred to me that this might happen. Damn! I put so much work into getting the system set up just right.” He shook his head, the regret plain on his face. “And the problem is …?” Sarah waited for him to fill in the missing piece. “The bass. It's causing an harmonic vibration. That's normal, but it shouldn't be causing the ceiling to shake.” Ian glanced up. “Do you hear me walking around up there?” “Unfortunately,” Sarah conceded. “So, what are we going to do?” “I have an idea, something so idiotically simple that it might just work! Wait here … I'll be back in a few minutes!” Ian headed out the door, never realizing that Sarah's eyes were riveted on his well padded posterior. Hmm, she wondered, is it my imagination, or is his diaper drooping a bit more than it was when I first noticed it? Standing in the quiet of her living room, a quiet interrupted only by the pulsing vibration of the ceiling (Lindsey was currently pounding out I'm So Afraid), without warning Sarah suddenly started to giggle, one of those helpless fits that caused her to rush into the kitchen and grab a glass of water. She choked it down, with the predictable result. She started to hiccup. This is just too funny, she mused, frantically waving her hand in front of her face. Twenty minutes ago, I wanted to piss him off enough to start a fight, and now … now … how's he going to react when I offer to change his pissy diaper????? . . . . The racket stopped, just the same way it always began. Abruptly. Sarah listened to Ian's footsteps fading away overhead, and rushed to the door. She knew that it would only be a matter of seconds, and she wanted him to feel welcome. He was obviously going all out for her, he was super cute, and she wanted to reciprocate. “Well?” “Just wait,” he muttered as she stood aside to let him pass. “Another thirty seconds, tops.” Ian stopped in the middle of the living room, and looked anxiously up at the ceiling. “I put on Led Zeppelin's When the Levee Breaks, the studio track. It's the one with the drum solo that John Bonham recorded out in the lobby. Mix in John Paul Jones on bass guitar, and there's a good chance the ceiling's gonna crack.” They both continued to look up. I just don't believe this, Sarah marveled, a groupie with a Ph.D. Like any sensible girl from the U.P., Sarah's taste ran to Country & Western. Roy Orbison was about as close to rock as she was willing to get. Still nothing. “It's okay.” Ian breathed a deep sigh of relief. “Really,” he said as he turned to her, “it's gonna be okay.” God, he's adorable! The look on his face? He looks just like a six year old bursting with pride because he got the answer right!“ Okay, Prof, what did you do? What's your deep, dark secret?” Ian roared with laughter. “What I did was … I took four bath towels … my only four, by the way … and I folded them up and put two under each speaker. Et voila! No more vibration!” “Only, now you have no bath towels ...” “Yeah ...” “And that old beater you were driving … the one that's been buried in a snow bank directly outside my living room window for the past month … DOA?” “Yeah … the alternator. I just don't have the money right now.” “Which is why I see you waiting for the bus when I'm leaving for work.” “Yeah … cue the Hollies.” “Okay … well, here's what we're going to do. After we get you changed, we're going to the store to buy you some new towels … my treat. Then, I'm going to take you out to dinner … your choice, but also my treat.” “Sarah ...” “No, Ian, and please let me finish. You kept me from making a complete fool of myself today, and from doing something that I would later have come badly to regret. This is just my way of thanking you for being so … so nice.” “But Sarah? Get me changed?” Sarah pointedly looked down at Ian's crotch, and then looked him straight in the eyes. “Your diaper, Ian. I don't want you leaking all over my car seat, so before we go, we are going to change your diaper. And I want you to bring a couple of extras. Do you have a diaper bag?” “Yes, but ...” Ian began to blush, but he quickly got it under control. He prided himself on his poker face … a face perfected in conferences with senior officers in Saigon who didn't have a clue, hangers on from the Korean conflict whose idiotic orders far too often cost the lives of men in the field that they could ill afford to lose. The bitterness ate at him like acid, the memories sometimes so overwhelming that it felt like he was drowning … the casual construction of strategy over aperitifs on the rooftop of the Hotel Caravelle, the details elaborated behind the barbed wire and the sandbags, the generals and the spooks ignoring the hardened French planters who had been fighting this war for generations … men often seated at the next table. It was Henri Duplessis who had schooled him in the difference between language and culture, Henri who had showed him how the French had lost their empire not in Viet Nam but in Algeria, warned him that America was making the exact same mistakes, the cycle repeating, Saigon the new Algiers, the Pentagon the new ... “No buts, Ian; the subject is closed.” “No, it isn't. Sarah, I've … I can change my own diaper, damn it!” “And you will. Ian, I am not going to interfere, but I am going to watch. In the past ten years, I must have changed at least 3,000 adult diapers, so I'm certainly qualified to carry out an Assessment.” “A … a what? “An Assessment. I am going to evaluate how well you clean yourself, how tightly you pin your new diaper, whether there is any cloth sticking out from your rubber or vinyl pants. And above all, I am going to evaluate how you wash your hands after the fact … even the kind of soap that you use. I'll offer you suggestions if there are things you need to improve on, but the only point at which I would intervene is to refasten your diaper if it looks like it's just going to fall off as soon as you stand up. You will be lying down when you change, right?” Sarah kept her voice detached and professional. She could, and in the future would make this really fun for Ian, but now was not the time. Now, she had to take control, put him in his place, and begin the long, drawn out process of gaining his trust. Ian stared hard at the floor. He couldn't bear to look in her eyes. “I'm trapped twixt and tween, Sarah,” he said in a voice so soft that she had to strain to hear him. “I really am. I can see what I'm doing if I'm standing up, but there's a motion involved that is so dangerous … it terrifies me. But lying down, it's all by feel, and you're right … you're so right. I think everything's okay, then I stand up, and the damned diaper is down at my knees! Ugh!” Sarah reached out and gently cupped Ian's cheeks in her hands, forcing him to look up, into her eyes. She was savoring her moment of triumph, but the look that she gave him was innocence personified. “Ian, I can and will help you, but I won't force myself upon you. All you have to do is ask … and, yes, I know that it's hard for a man, any man with an ounce of pride, to ask for help, especially with a problem that's so intimate. I can change your diaper, and keep it strictly professional the whole time. Or we can talk about the weather, your favorite sports team, anything you think would help to distract you. I can even make it light and a bit of fun for you; many of my patients liked being teased when I was changing them because they had the ability to laugh at themselves and the absurdity of the situation we were both trapped in. But you have to talk to me, Ian; you can't shut down or I can't help you. And yes, I know how hard it is … believe me, I've been here before. But I have to know what happened to you out there, what it is that's so dangerous, what I have to avoid.” Sarah reached down and firmly grasped Ian's hands in her own. “Now, let's go change your diaper.” . . . . “Ian, you need to take more time when you're wiping.” Ian was lying down on a changing pad, his used diaper long since banished to the pail. He was blindly wiping his genitalia. Everything was by feel, and he knew that he wasn't getting it right. “Sarah, thank you so much. It was a really great suggestion, and right now I feel more dumb than I usually do for not seeing it myself.” Sarah had said that it would be a lot easier for him to wipe his bottom if he moved the changing mat close enough to the wall that he could walk his feet up it, and fully expose his rear. For the first time, he felt like he was making real progress in managing his incontinence. For her part, Sarah was horrified by what she had learned. The bullet had shattered on impact, and the MASH unit had methodically and efficiently dug out all but one fragment-- a piece lodged so close to the spinal cord at L5 that they judged it best left alone rather than undertake a high risk surgery which, if it went wrong, could leave him paralyzed for life from the waist down. Angry and horrified. She was angry because of the risk that he was running every time he changed his diaper, especially the messy ones. Ian had grudgingly admitted that it was hard to avoid getting a jolt along the sciatic nerve when he bent over and twisted to survey the damage, and using baby wipes to clean his bottom merely aggravated the risk. A shower was the obvious answer, but he routinely had three to five BM's daily. So … obvious but impractical. Now that she at least had a handle on what she was up against, Sarah was also infuriated. She was good at her job, and a messy diaper was an easy cleanup. She could make a lot of Ian's risk go away if he would simply let her take responsibility for his well-being in general, and his diaper changes in particular. And therein lay the problem. In fact, it was crystal-clear: in Ian's mind, getting help was a mutual transaction-- help received equals independence lost. But Sarah had learned something else today. Ian Grady was a nail biter, and spectacularly so. Twice in the brief time that they had been together, she had caught him chewing on fingernails, all of them already bitten to the quick. His oral fixation was so strong that he seemed completely oblivious to what he was doing. There were things that she could and would do to put a stop to it-- the bulbous mittens that they employed post-surgery to keep patients from pulling on their catheters or attacking itchy sutures, and an orthodontic device for tube feeding patients unable to feed themselves. It looked amazingly like a baby's pacifier, and with that she began nibbling around the edges of an intriguing idea. His long-term prognosis would be much improved if he would simply admit to some degree of dependence on others, but the adult male would fiercely resist any attempt to take him down this path. Well, what about the baby that lurks inside Ian Grady the same way it does in every man? If the adult won't yield to a caregiver, will the baby fully entrust himself to his mommy? Let's face facts, Miss Sarah Haikkonen: the sexual possibilities in this scenario for both of us are well and truly off the charts! I have got to talk to Mom about this! . . . . “All things considered, Ian, I think that went very well. Of course, it was to be expected that I would have to redo your diaper. Pinning your own diaper tight enough when you're laying down is about as likely as winning the lottery. Babies don't change their own diapers, and neither should you.” Sarah glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. “It's strictly mommy's work,” she added deftly, planting the thought in his mind. “And when I'm at work,” he quietly rejoined, “who's going to change me there?” Ian slowly shook his head. “Sarah, I am truly grateful for everything that you're doing for me, but what you're suggesting simply isn't practical. On the weekends? Yeah, maybe. But Monday through Friday? No. Five days a week, I'll just have to muddle along the best I can.” “Fair enough,” she conceded. “So, why don't we start with the basics? First, do you want my help? Yes, or no?” “Yes.” Ian decided to leave it at that. “Good. So, why don't we begin with what is practical, namely the weekend? From now on, I will pick you up at your office on Friday afternoon at 4:30, and return you to work Monday morning. In fact, you will no longer be taking the bus at all. It's silly for you to do so when we have nearly identical work schedules. You can do without using your baby diapers as stuffers until you get to the office, and save a little money in the process.” “Sounds good,” Ian agreed. He hated the bus. “Second. From Friday afternoon until I drop you off on Monday, I will assume total responsibility for your diaper changes … which reminds me. I want to take one of your diapers with me to the hospital on Monday. I have a feeling that, when I put them side by side, it will turn out that ours will be both bigger and more absorbent. If you use ours on the weekend, you can reduce your order with the diaper service. More money saved.” “Also good, but how are we going to launder them?” “In the basement. Ian, you know perfectly well that we have four washers and driers down there. You need to start doing your own diaper laundry, and the money you're saving on bus fare alone should cover the costs.” “But the whole point of the diaper service …” “Ian, stop it. All right? Just stop it.” There was a red light coming up, and as she braked Sarah decided to take advantage of it. “Look, I know you don't want to hear it, but the blunt truth is that, unless and until there is a revolutionary breakthrough in surgical procedures, you are going to be incontinent for the rest of your life, which means that you are going to be wearing diapers for the rest of your life. The diaper service will be a constant drain on your finances … and how are you going to manage when you're traveling? You will be, you know … lectures, conferences … a lot of people are going to want a piece of you. You are going to have to rely on your own resources, and your own resourcefulness. I can help, and I plan to, but unless you choose to throw it all away and spend the rest of your life hiding under the bed like a small child, the burden is going to fall largely on your shoulders. Mind you,” she giggled, “I think that you'd make an adorable baby. Honestly, you are beyond cute when you've got nothing on but your little diapee and your baby pants! I would give anything to see you crawling around on the floor like a wittle, wittle baby!” The light changed, and Sarah hit the accelerator, her devilish laughter still hanging in the air. She mentally congratulated herself for playing the baby card with real finesse. Ian prudently decided to say nothing. The diner was just a few minutes away, and he was starting to have visions of a patty melt, onion rings, and fries in his immediate future. A chocolate shake was definitely in the offing. Sure, he'd undoubtedly have a messy diaper by the time they got home-- greasy food was his archenemy-- but what the Hell. For now at least, he was off the hook. He stole a glance at his erstwhile chauffeur, and gave thought to what she was clearly offering. She's drop dead gorgeous, talented and smart, and at least a bit kinky, so with any luck at all she'll despise the missionary position as much as I do. And those tits? Man, those are well and truly to die for! How did Bob Seger put it … 'points of her own, sittin' way up high, way up firm and high'? And the best part of it all? It sounds like she wants to take outright control of my life. Well, my dear, you can do it with my blessing, because there's a few things about me that you haven't caught on to yet. I'm done with making decisions. I will walk around a problem and study it from a thousand different angles, and then tell everyone that I'm sure I've missed something, and need to start over from scratch. But the reality is that I'm stalling, hoping that the problem will resolve itself without any help from me, or just simply go away, vanish on the breeze. Hell, if Emily had just cut out the passive-aggressive crap and become as dominant as she was decisive, we'd still be married! But no, when things went well, she took all the credit. And when her decisions blew up in our face, like not selling the condo when we had the chance? Why the fault was mine and mine alone because I didn't stand up to her. Yeah, sure. And the irony of it all is that I straight up offered Emily what Sarah is only hinting at. I was in diapers anyway, so I'd become her baby or her baby slave, whatever … but no more blame shifting. She'd get all of the credit, but she'd also take all of the blame. That was the deal, and she refused to take it. So, adios and sayonara, babe. I am so out of here. And here's (imaginary drum roll, please) … Sarah (thank you, Ed McMahon), all but offering me the golden ring. But how are we going to jump the hurdles? The logistical problems are daunting, and it doesn't look like there are any quick fixes. I'll just leave it to her to sort it all out. Just go with the flow, my friend … just go with the flow. . . . . “Before we go, Ian, there's just one more thing.” “More coffee?,” he offered in return, ever hopeful. “No, silly, it's about your hands. Just look at them!” Ian did precisely that. He held them up in front of his face, and took a count. “Ten digits,” he nodded; “all present and accounted for.” Well, almost. Ian had learned about recoil the hard way. “No, silly. I'm talking about your fingers.” “What about them?” “You bite your fingernails, and it's disgusting. There's germs crawling all over everything you touch, and yet you persist in putting your fingers in your mouth. Just like a toddler. Honestly, it makes me wonder whether you're still sucking your thumb in your sleep.” “I haven't a clue, honestly times two. But you're right, Sarah, it's a nasty habit. And I have tried to break it … many, many times. Nothing's worked.” “Well, we have mittens at the hospital that will help. When we're at home and you're in my care, you will wear them whenever you're out of my sight, especially when you're sleeping. But if your mouth gets lonely, we have an orthodontic device that you can suck on … really, it's just a great, big pacifier. You'll love it.” “Maybe so, but there's definitely something else around here that I would rather suck on.” Bold as brass, Ian stared steadily at Sarah's breasts. “After all, as we both know, babies explore everything with their fingers and tongues.” “True. All too true. And I have big plans for your fingers and tongue.” Sarah's gaze was equally steady. “Big Plans.”

As with my previous stories, this one contains several elements inherent to the pre-established 'Diaper Dimension.' These include, but are not limited to: Diapers and their usage for their intended purpose Breastfeeding Non-consensual mental regression through various means (Including possible drugs, hypnosis, and/or surgery) References to surgery to achieve various nefarious goals Humiliation Giants, aka, Amazons or Bigs Predominantly female domination (some male) Babying of adults (perceived or otherwise) Experimentation on humans Kidnapping Coerced or manipulated actions through possible means of white lies, gas lighting, or incentives Mild language or use of explitives Depictions of death, illness, or handicaps Graphic imagery associated with any of these warnings This story has not been labeled as mature, due to a lack of specific references to anything overtly sexual, but this warning serves as a 'turn back' point for any readers who do not wish to read about the previous warnings. Lastly, this list is subject to change during the course of writing this story. While most of the plot is ironed out, more warnings may be added if needed. For those readers interested or do not care about the warnings listed, please enjoy the following story or for the first story, go to the following link: https://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?/topic/86107-a-stuffys-tale-one-bunnys-journey-in-the-diaper-dimension-chapter-17-complete/ For those interested in the sequel to the first story and the near parallel story of this one, go to the following link: https://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?/topic/90405-dashs-redemption-a-stuffys-tale-and-diaper-dimension-story-chapter-15-complete/ Hey everyone! So, as promised, this is the follow-up mostly concurrent story with Dash’s Redemption. I know that story didn’t prove to be the most popular of all the stories I’ve written, but I think this one should be a little more of the standard fair, and to be blunt, I’m almost kind of using this as a bit of a palate cleanser before moving on with my other stories this year. Further, due to how this one even popped up and the fact that I’m going to probably be shying away from other stuffy’s tales in the near future, I just wanted to finish this one up right away, rather than waiting a long time on it. If I continue to do the voting for the next stories from you all, I have a feeling I wouldn’t get to this story for a very long time, if ever. So, I’m doing it here and I’ll probably be going very fast through it. Unless something massively changes, expect successive days of chapter postings. Also, just as a tiny warning here, there is a particular scene that could be troubling to some readers in here. I do have my little warning previously, but I just wanted to add another one here. It doesn’t last long, but I just wanted to ensure that everyone knew about it first. Also, on that note, Emma’s story has already been partially written out, and sometimes, to fall, things need to break a bit. Please keep that in for the other chapters as well… Moving forward, right now, this story is standing at about 16 chapters. While that’s about twice the length I was originally thinking it was going to be, I think you all will definitely enjoy the fleshed-out characters more and some of the implications and connections I’ve added here. All that being said, I’m only going to be polling two stories this go around. As I stated at the end of my previous story, because this story wasn’t even on the list, the polling will just be between the Tell Me More sequel, or the Bethany semi-follow up to The Opening. For those of you just reading this story, I will be sharing these two options at the start of my next chapter. Lastly, just to clarify, when I said that I was going to ‘retire’ the age regression virus story, I only meant that I wasn’t going to include it in the polling for just the next few stories at least. I may consider asking about second choices, which admittedly could have changed the outcome of what I was seeing you all wanting this round, but I’ll keep that in mind for a future story poll after this one. For now, in the year of mostly sequels, I usually include in the poll two sequel stories, and one new story, and at the moment, I will just be including another completely separate story instead of the age regression virus story. Anyways, I hope everyone enjoys this first chapter of my next story! Chapter 1: I Was a Teacher on Break Well, I finally made it here. A month of research and continuous travel agents talked to, had all led up to me being here… in another dimension no less. I of course had been born before they came, but now, almost 20 years later, it just felt like a distant memory. The therapist I used to see said it was repressed memories or some nonsense like that, but basically, I always just remembered the race of Amazons, sorry, Bigs, in my life. Alternate dimensional theory was now a cornerstone of most college courseloads, but still… being here and seeing everything, really was just something else. I had heard the rumors about this place, but I had always just chalked them up to paranoid people trying to get in the way of everyone enjoying our new paradise on Earth. After all, life expectancies had essentially doubled and things like medicine, energy, and education were all on the rise. In retrospect, it’s probably why I became a high school English teacher. I was Miss Breckenridge, or Miss Emily if they were trying to suck up to me somehow, but it was a solid job, and I got most summers off if I chose to. With our salaries much higher than decades before, teaching had become the hot new career for aspiring academics. That being said, despite all the changes, raging teenage hormones and attitudes did not. So, out in Arizona, when the summer session was coming up in the beginning of May, I decided to spread my wings a little bit and try something new. * * * “Are you really going?” Vicky asked me skeptically, her history teacher roots making her highly suspicious of any country or race coming to another, where one was drastically more technologically superior to the other. “What if it’s like the Aztecs and the Spanish… and we’re the Aztecs?” I could feel the raw apprehension in my friend, and I stopped packing up my room for one moment to try and ease her mind. “Relax, Vicky. You worry too much about that sort of stuff. It’s been over twenty years since they came, and we’re all still here. No smallpox or invading army turning us into slaves.” I was actually quite impressed I could still remember her nerdy little reference and shoot something back to her myself. There was a reason I was an English teacher instead. She just shook her head though. “English teachers… you all are just dreamers… I bet you imagine yourself like some brave new explorer going over there, huh? Like in one of your precious books?” I smiled. “Oh, yes. Emily Breckenridge… explorer extraordinaire!” She lightly shoved me on the shoulder. “I’m serious, Em. Jus be careful, will you?” She then lowered her voice and walked slowly closer to me. “Look, I just read this article about some guy that went over there. There’s some freaky stuff going on. Like treating you all like… babies.” I rolled my eyes. “Give me a break, Vic. I read the same stupid article as well, and the five stories that have been published like that since I was a teenager, as opposed to the hundreds of positive stories. I mean, did you happen to read that it was posted in some tabloid piece originally? I think it was even nestled between Aliens replaced my cousin and the fountain of youth being discovered near some daycare in Florida in that issue. You can’t believe everything you read. I might be a lowly English teacher,” I joked, “but take it from me… you can’t believe everything you read. I mean, you don’t really think that Mr. Darcy was real, do you?” Now, it was Vic’s turn to roll her eyes. “Fine, just don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She then retreated back to my classroom door before turning back to me with a face I could only recognize as worry. “Just promise me you’ll be safe, okay?” I sighed and paused once again as I packed all my stuff up for the summer. “Yes, Vic. I will be as careful as I can be. I’ll even stay in contact with the embassy as soon as I get settled, okay?” My friend just nodded, heaved a great sigh, and left my classroom. I could tell that she was legitimately worried about me, and to be honest, I was no fool and had done my research. It was almost a hobby of mine now I had spent so much time on it, but I had thoroughly investigated every company and agency getting people over there. After numerous searches, I had finally found a tour group that seemed pretty open and widely expansive across the country. Plus, they boasted, with real statistics, a 90% success rate, even over multiple trips. For perspective, the next highest was only at 70%. So, armed with my new knowledge, I packed my last To Kill a Mockingbird marked-up copy away and headed back out to my car. I refueled at the nearest EV charging station, went home and retrieved my travel suitcase, passport, and papers, and hailed a driver to take me to the nearest rail station. The new rails were all the rage lately to get between the states and plus, they connected most of the country together now. Having one just on the outskirts of Phoenix, I was able to get to most places in the country in half the time it used to take. To my delight, that included the portal facility out in Nevada. Unfortunately, they were still constructing the one to serve the greater Arizona area, but with the rail lines, I was just as happy to go to a main transport hub, instead of bouncing around the country to get to your intended destination like before. So, one 300 mph trip later, I rocketed into place right in front of the portal facility now gleaming before me. “Miss?” a kindly woman waved at me. “Checking in today?” I nodded and rolled my bag over to her. “Yes, uh, one flight to Virgan,” I informed her as I grabbed the ticket in my top suitcase pocket. It was hard not to get frustrated with the paper copies, but apparently last year, some poor guy was sent to Australia on their side because his electronic ticket was hacked by Big spies on this side of the portal. I wish I could say that it was an isolated incident. “Hmmm… Virgan. A very exciting and upcoming place. Come this way,” she beckoned me inside. I, of course, followed behind her and to the travel desk located just inside. Some portal facilities acted just like any other airport terminal, while the one here in Nevada favored the more ‘personal touch.’ According to their website I had read up on a month ago, it led to less unfavorable incidents. ‘Less though… not none…’ The lady quickly helped me along and after checking that I was all set, she handed my ticket back to me. “Perfect. You’re all set, and it actually looks like we’ve got a portal coming right up to Virgan in the next 15 minutes.” She then pointed to a hallway behind her, marked with a giant number ‘1’ on both the walls and even the flooring. “Just follow the hallway down here and get into the tram. Only that tram and just go to the gate they tell you after. Hold onto your ticket no matter what.” I nodded with the seriousness she intended in that last part. I for sure didn’t want a mix-up and end up in aplce like Honshu. Still, I smiled back. “Thank you.” I then resumed wheeling my bag and made sure I stuck to the single designated ‘1’ hallway. Minutes later, it ended, and I hopped onboard a tram service in the car marked with another giant red ‘1.’ The cars in front of us were then marked with a blue ‘2’ and green ‘3’ right after. “All aboard. Leaving for portal building in ten seconds…’ the electronic voice called out from the speakers above. I closed my eyes for a moment and only reopened them when I felt a lurch and could feel the warm sunlight from outside bathing the car. There wasn’t a town for miles around and even the main hub of the portal facility was separated from the actual portals themselves. One expert cited radiation, another explosion, but another more ludicrous theory was that the original portal almost blew a hole in the dimensional fabric of space time… or something like that. I was grading papers at the time and for most of us living on Earth still now, as long as the portal remained stable, the old reasons of why the separation mattered less and less with each passing year they remained safe. In the midst of my thoughts, the car lurched to a stop right at the height of the looped track and in front of the actual portal building. Inside seemed pretty plain, but once again, I just followed the large red ‘1’ on the floor and from the signs overhead. Those from cars ‘2’ and ‘3’ still had to wait for their portal to be recalibrated and relocated to another region of the other dimension. Finally, though, I showed my ticket once more to a tall, burly man waiting by a pair of revolving doors, and satisfied I was who I claimed to be, I moved past him and to the large room on the other side. Rumors had swirled for years about the specs and veneers of the portals changing, but they still looked like they did for the past almost 15 years now. Circular hubs vibrated and pulsed as the energy coils recharged while several bumbling scientists muddled and fussed with the bevy of controls and dials before them. Occasionally the lights would flicker, but since none of the scientists below seemed the least bit concerned, I felt pretty confident that nothing was amiss. Seeing a few others have their tickets be inspected and then directed elsewhere, I stepped up and made sure my ticket was already out of my suitcase. “Ticket, please,” one of the younger scientists, dressed in the stereotypical lab coat, asked me. “Richt… here you go.” I handed him the ticket once more with a smile. He just took it without any overt sign of emotion before handing me a single blue triangular pill. “Good. Just in time. Group 4, down in front by the portal,” he said, readjusting his glasses while gesturing over to the large crowd of people there now. “Take the pill before and just give the coils a time to recharge and you’ll be off in no time.” I nodded and followed over to the rear of the line before swallowing the pill whole. Just as I got in line, though, the coils began to vibrate even louder, and the scientists panicked briefly. I wondered if I should, but at the last second, one of the more elderly ones cranked a handle all the way to the left and the vibrations turned into a low pitch, like a low note had just been plucked on a base guitar. It pulsed for a moment, before the whole place shook once more and then stopped as liquid then seemed to fill in the previously empty circular device on the platform above the crowd of people that I was now a part of. As soon as the seemingly calmly bluish liquid touched though in the center, it let out a final twang, sucked in and out, and finally, was still. The resulting surface still shimmered with an unearthly blue and seemed about as reflective as glass and as full of life as a bubbling stream. “Beautiful, but ugh! Popped my ears I think…” I mused out loud while trying to blow my nose to fix the fullness I felt in both ears. “Yeah... these things have a tendency to do that,” the man in front of me said casually, turning around over his shoulder a little bit. “Punching a hole in the universe or something like that. Popular Mechanics ran an article a few months back… I think that’s what it said…” He seemed less sure at the end, so I wasn’t sure if I was getting the full picture of the article, but it still made sense. “Right… guess this stuff isn’t for amateurs anymore…” I said half-heartedly, recalling when the technology was released to the public and a few start-up companies tried to make their own. As people began to enter, I remembered the results were… unfavorable, or at least from what I’ve been told. Then, after the man in front of me went through the portal, I stepped up, my ticket was ripped in half and the scientist there gestured to the portal. “Whenever you’re ready…” I nodded and took a breath. ‘Just like an explorer in one of your books, Em… just go right on through… it’s a whole new world.’ I took another breath and as the final bit of air released from my lips, I stepped forward and bathed myself in the shimmering metallic blue in front of me. All at once, I felt my body being stretched, on fire, contorted, deep frozen, and smashed like a ripe tomato in the summer. It was awful and I wanted to puke. My legs dangled in the air, and I swore I could feel wind in my face as the ripples of thousands of explosions of color rocketed before my eyes. Just as I began to completely freak out though, my feet touched solid ground again. “There you go, missy,” a loud booming voice above me noted. “Easy does it.” I felt a hand guide me by the shoulders, and it honestly took me a minute to see that first, I was in a very different and almost elegant building compared to the near-warehouse one I had just come from, and second, the hand on my shoulders actually seemed to almost be able to reach both of them, being so large and all. I almost yelped out a bit of surprise when I looked up and there was a woman staring right back at me. “Hey there, let’s get you cleaned off, huh?” I panicked and almost wanted to run away right there, but the woman just guided me to what almost looked like one of those old phone booths my grandparents used to use. Instead of a phone inside though, as soon as the door was closed, the whole chamber filled with a whiteish, greenish smoke. I felt I had arrived at my ultimate doom, but not even three seconds later, all the smoke was sucked away and the woman guided me back out. “Perfect! All clean and sterilized. Now, just right down those steps and to your destination!” Her tone unnerved me, and it took me a second to pin down why. It wasn’t condescending... quite the opposite in fact, but with a mild amount of panic, I realized it was that same type of sing-song voice that was used in customer service… crossed near seamlessly with the tone one would use with small children. ‘Damn! I knew I should have worn my leather jacket over here instead of my light blue sweater!’ I was in this dimension for less than two minutes and I already felt marked. It didn’t seem to matter much though, as another Big then escorted me to a singular waiting room. “Please. Wait right here and have a cookie and some juice. You might have lost some sugar on the way over here with our new methods and from the pill you took.” I nodded listlessly, parked my suitcase in front of a chair, and grabbed myself an oatmeal cookie and what appeared an awful lot like grape juice, though it was called ‘uva’ juice. I almost even opted out of drinking it, fearful of all the nasty rumors I had heard about Bigs spiking drinks or whatnot, but feeling lightheaded, I figured it was better to drink it now rather than pass out later. Feeling rejuvenated after a moment, I saw there seemed to be an almost unending stream of travelers arriving after me, so, my juice empty and my cookie eaten, I stood up and pulled my suitcase along with me. One hallway, covered in pictures of happy tourists, later, and I was standing outside at what looked like a bus and taxi depot. “Ticket, ma’am?” a voice asked me. Now, I was prepared to be surrounded by the whole giant lot of them, but as an adult, once just gets used to the notion of most other adults being about your height. Standing a few inches under 6 feet tall, at worst, I just had to look up a little… no need to readjust where I was standing to not hurt my neck. The Big before me though was not anywhere in the ballpark of six feet tall. “Ticket, ma’am?” he asked again, his expression almost seemingly asking if I was okay as well. My eyes just stared up at this being, who despite looking like he had just graduated high school, seemed to be almost twice my height. “Uh… uh… here…” I shakily said, retrieving my ticket and then handing it over to him, still in awe of the differences in our sizes. Inside, I was half-dazed, but now here in the full light, my senses were feeling a little overwhelmed at the view before me. For a moment, he seemed to dislike my awe, or was just impatient, but once he looked at my ticket, his smile returned. “Oh, look at that. Local travel. Wonderful! I’m sure you’ll just love our city! Loculofus is the best kept secret in Virgan!” I could see right through his sales pitch, but in truth, I wasn’t really sure how long I was going to be staying in the capital of Virgan. Still, it was a nice greeting at the start of my trip here. “Uh, I hope so. Can I get a ride, or a…?” He wasted no time and held up his finger to stop me. “Wait one moment.” Then, with the speed and power of a train whistle, he parted his lips and blew into fingers, creating a high-pitched sound. A car quickly pulled up. “Here you go, ma’am. First ride is included with your transport. Be careful out there but enjoy the city!” I nodded and quickly loaded myself and my suitcase into the car, before he shut the door and waved goodbye to me. “Thank you!” I quickly shouted as the car began driving away. He smiled, nodded, and then just went to help the next in a string of us new portal Littles here. The driver had to navigate some pretty odd ways out of the portal facility, but as he began to make his exit, he finally piped up. “Where to, miss?” I was so distracted by all the differences from back home that I had completely neglected to tell him where to go. “Oh! Sorry about that… uh… just once sec…” I then pulled out a map I had purchased beforehand of the city on my phone. There was a whole slew of apps now dedicated to helping Little tourists like me, and this one had received the best reviews so far. “Uh… monument park, please?” He hesitated for a moment, but still nodded his head. After a few routes onto the main highway system, I saw my first glimpse of the steel and granite city, all refined in its splendor after the reconstruction from the last Height War, or at least that’s what my travel guide said. It filled me with excitement, but the driver then spoke up. “Uh, miss? I’ll take you to where you want to go… free charge and all, but are you sure about wanting to be dropped off at monument park?” “Yes…” I said confidently, but the way he was looking back at me and seemed nervous, caused a few cracks to form in that feeling. “Uh, just out of curiosity, why do you ask? Is there something problematic there now?” He quickly shook his head. “Oh, not at all. Just that… well, most Littles want to go to their hotel first. As I said, I’ll take you where you want, but I’m just putting it out there.” For the briefest of moments, I considered what he was telling me. I had two things I knew though that went against his advice. First, most Littles went to their hotel and ended up having a problem anyway… some hotels even being centers of regression programs apparently. Second though, I had looked up the distance on my phone before I left and saw that there were beautiful monuments in the park, and it was only about nine blocks to my hotel. To a daily walker like me, it didn’t seem so bad. I shook my head. “No. Thank you for your concern, but I want to see the park while I still have the chance. I don’t think the walk will be too bad anyways.” He nodded and continued driving. Not long after, we pulled up and I could see the petals blooming on all the trees lining the park and the avenue beyond it. I got out, breathed in the fresh air, and then leaned back over and thanked my driver. He nodded back and sighed. “Good luck.” With that, he drove off and I was all alone. Now, I had grown up in the rubble of what was once our country after all our own wars and crises. It had toughened me up a bit and being alone on the streets wasn’t exactly new to me, so I just rolled my suitcase along and began to take pictures of all the art decorations and sculptures dedicated to the past heroes of Virgan. Military seemed to be the most prominent, but as I continued, I saw a few scientists, creators, and lawmakers as well. Curiously, all were sculpted the exact same size, despite the obvious markers at the base of each denoting, Big, Middle, or Little. I wasn’t exactly sure what to make of it, but a very long block later, I decided to stop for lunch. The line was a bit odd, to see from the outside with the varying heights and I will admit, it was the first time I was truly intimidated here, being sandwiched right in between two Bigs, both of whom looked at me with a look I didn’t quite recognize. A little more sleezy and I thought that they would have hit on me, but a little softer, and I would feel like they were my dad about to ask if I needed any help like it was my first day of school or something. I didn’t really like the look and just focused on my order and getting my food. “One hot skylos, please?” I asked the man at the counter. He almost seemed to grumble, but then turned around and caught sight of me. He paused for a moment and seemed almost perplexed for a moment as he stroked his stubbly double chin. “You’re not from around here, are you?” he asked gruffly but with a warmth I didn’t really expect. I shook my head. “Is it that obvious?” He laughed and some of the other Bigs did as well, but a few just looked impatient. “You could say that. See, what you just ordered is about a quarter of your entire body length.” He then looked at me up and down and smiled. “Seeing as you’re new and just out the portal, I’m gonna give you two pieces of advice. First, look up extensively what you’re going to buy before you do. Not everyone’s gonna be as nice as me.” A few of the previously impatient Bigs chuckled. The vendor briefly looked up in annoyance but then came back to me with a smile. “Second, just get off the street and get to where you’re going fast. This area ain’t the best for you types and all. Got it?” I swallowed at his last warning and quickly nodded. He smiled widely back and reached in and gave me a normal sized looking what I would call, hot dog. “Here. No charge. Just get to where you’re going pronto. Good luck.” I tried to pay him after, but he just insisted on the goodwill gesture. So, I soon found myself hurdling down the block about as fast as I could. I only got about two blocks before I just had to stop. I was feeling faint, and my stomach was nearly gnawing me in two. Not liking it, but feeling I had no choice and listening to my stomach over the vendor, I sat down. I tried to eat about as fast as I could of the hot skylos, but for some reason, it seemed to fill me up much faster than I was used to. Not intent on puking today, I slowed a bit and tried to plan out my trip. See, I had planned out most of this trip already, but I had given myself two options, of which, I would just cancel one when I figured out what I wanted to do. Going north, I could hit Libertalia’s capital city, New Columbia, and eventually make my way up to New Eboracum City. Both cities and all that lay between were practically the same as where I had just come from, but being in the north, it was usually safer for Littles. On the other hand, I could go south to Carolusa and eventually Flosus. I would hit a few cities but going south meant more of an emphasis on the natural wonders. Waterfalls 200 feet tall weren’t uncommon and the mountain views were voted as some of the best on the east coast. On the flipside though, being the south, Littles didn’t tend to do better down there. Still, as soon as I finished my last bite, I knew I had to table the decision until later. Unfortunately, I only got about a block further when I realized just how long the blocks were here. First, I was already battling the longer stretches of the two types of blocks, as every block east or west was about two going north or south. Additionally, because of the supersized everything here to accommodate the Bigs better, that amount could easily be doubled again. So, while I had read nine blocks to my hotel, I probably should have read it more like 36 blocks, and right now, I had only just about the halfway point. Tired, sore, and still running on fumes from the amount of energy the portal travel had taken out of me, I stopped and looked at my map once more to see if there were any shortcuts to the hotel. From what I could see, there weren’t any, but I finally saw a friendly-looking couple walking my way. Both being Bigs, I knew it was a risk going up to them, but I was desperate, so I decided to take my chances. “Excuse me?” I asked the pair once they got withing talking range. Both stopped and looked down at me with large smiles. “Yes? Can we help you, miss…?” the woman asked nicely. “Uh, Emily,” I replied back a little hesitant over giving my name out. Still though, I wanted their help, and I didn’t want to offend them by keeping that secret, or if they were the tricky types, I had heard that some Bigs viewed a Little not giving out their name as an admission they were too young to know it. “Good to meet you, Emily,” the man spoke up. “I’m Jim and this is my wife, Lilly. How can we help you? Are you lost?” I noticed he was eyeing the map on my phone. I blushed and nodded. “Geez. I guess I’m a little too obvious out here with my map and all.” “Just a little,” Lilly said, still smiling. “Might want to memorize the route and look at it sparingly.” I nodded. “Definitely, but I need to find my hotel… the Hotel Eirinison?” “Ooh. Fancy schmancy. It’s just up the street here,” Jim said, pointing in the exact direction I was headed. “Right, but…” I gestured to my suitcase still rolling behind me, “do you have any suggestions for getting there quicker? A shortcut maybe?” Both seemed nervous and looked at each other before nodding. Lilly turned to me. “We do and it’s a cut-through alley just ahead beyond the statue of the Little soldier up there.” I looked beyond and saw it. “It will lead you straight through to the other side...” “But we strongly suggest you stick to the park and street path you’re on now,” Jim emphasized while Lilly nodded her head in agreement. “It’s a little longer but it’s safer.” He paused and looked back to where they had just come from. “You can also cut over two blocks from here after the metal sculpture. It’s not much but it will save you a little time later.” “Well, thank you both.” I then stuffed my phone back in my pocket and we both said our goodbyes before departing back our separate ways. Strangely though, as they left, I also received my third ‘good luck’ today from them. Each of the three had been said in about the exact same tone after each had warned me about a potential danger. With each ‘good luck’ before, I had listened to and then ignored their advice and as I came to the Little soldier statue as Lilly had pointed out, I was at yet another decision. The Little soldier stood proud and tall, but I could also see the fear in his eyes as if he was looking at someone particularly frightening before him. I definitely wondered about that war, seeming to be the last in all the major conflicts here, but now, I felt I just had to summon the courage that soldier once possessed as well. It didn’t hurt my resolve either that ‘Hotel Eirinison’ was emblazoned on the building front I could see right at the end of the alleyway. So, sighing, I turned right instead of just continuing through the park. Oddly, the whole city seemed to have been rebuilt following one of the apparently more severe bombings here during the war. According to one source, the vileness of some of the Bigs toward Littles in the south stemmed from the Great Height war as many Littles captured or invaded cities to the point where mass bombings had to be conducted to win them back. Still, most news articles purported the south was fully swinging back and most cities only blazed with light and progress. This alleyway though, seemed to be immune from all that progress. An asphalt street snaked its way in between the facades of two brick buildings, both worn and even crumbling in a few spots. Downtown had now become a mix of both the new and the old, and from the looks of it, I was definitely in the old part. About a minute later and almost to the other side, I thought I heard a clinking behind me. I turned to look, but I didn’t see anyone, so I just kept walking. Another clinking. This time, I spun around faster. Still no one, but now, a single cardboard box wavered slightly on top of the trash from the backdoor of what I could only guess was a restaurant. Nervous, I turned back and saw the hotel sign, closer than ever. Right then, I heard another clinking sound. This time though, when I turned around, I came to face-to-face with a single Big. “W… who are you? Wh… wh… what do you want?” I could feel my pulse racing. He cocked his head to the side. “Lost are you, little one?” He smiled and I could see him flash a pair of yellow teeth, matching horribly well with his tattered clothing. I wanted to retreat, and I even backed up a little bit, but then, I heard another clinking sound behind me. This time, I only turned a little, to keep the other crooked teeth man in my view still, but to my horror, I saw the other end of the alley was now blocked as well. “Hello, sweetie…” the well-manicured man said confidently, walking a little closer to me. This one was dressed much nicer than the other one and the bearded mute man by his side. Whereas the other two’s shoes were patched or dirty, his shoes shined. “Please… just leave me alone…” I hated how I sounded so weak, and I really wished I had just listened to the other Bigs, but I knew it was too late. I thought about yelling out for someone to help, but the crooked teeth one came closer, and his coat opened a little to reveal a large terrifying knife hanging from his belt. It silenced any of those notions pretty quickly, especially considering the knife seemed like it could have easily split me in two. The three just sinisterly laughed, as each stalked ever closer to me. I could feel my stomach in my throat, and I tried to see a way out of this, but I was failing at every angle. There were more of them, and each was twice my height. Also, once again, they gave me the same look between creepy and caring. If I could have crawled out of my skin right then, I would have. “I think she wants to play, boss…” the crooked teeth man taunted, laughing dumbly at his own joke after. The mute man just smiled, and the rich man’s eyes lit up. “Perfect. Just who we were looking for.” Each got within striking distance and the rich man stared back into my eyes with both desire and satisfaction. I could only imagine in terror what he had planned for me. “Now, sweetie, you stay quiet, and my boys won’t have to get nasty. You got it? Nod if you do, darling.” Remembering the knife, I slowly nodded and allowed myself to be escorted by the three back down the alleyway and away from my hotel. The mute man took my suitcase as the crooked teeth man handed it off to him and the rich man pounded on one of the doors. I could hear music inside and I looked up to see where I was likely headed. To my horror, I saw a single clearly regressed Little pressed up against one of the panes of glass above me. They seemed so lifeless… almost dead even and I felt very different than them, but I knew with all the technology of the Bigs, both good and bad, the distance between me and that Little was uncomfortably close. So, seeing the three men momentarily be distracted by their own dealings, I knew it was a small opportunity, but I saw my opening. Despite the threat of the knife I had seen, fear of whatever happened to that Little happening to me was a bigger motivator. Then, in fear and taking a quick breath, I ran. I didn’t get far though when the crooked teeth man caught up with me. His hand grabbed onto my blue sweater, but I just yanked out of his flimsy grip as he almost started to brag back to the rich man. Unfortunately, the force catapulted me forward and smacked me into the side of dumpster. Still, undeterred, I got back up and ran once more. “You idiot!” the rich man admonished the crooked teeth man. “Don’t damage the merchandise. You know what a prime Little like that would go for!” Meanwhile, the mute man had just kept running and tried to catch up with me once more. I was doing pretty well, but his strides proved too much though and he lunged out to grab me. He succeeded but I guess he also liked to play with his prey. He then began to push me around a little. It wasn’t much, but a few gentle shoves here and there in the decrepit alleyway quickly tore holes and seams all over my clothing. For their part, the crooked teeth man and rich man only chuckled amusedly at my torment as they walked closer. Finally, the mute man stopped, but I then realized his widened stance and his beckoning face just wanted me to charge him. So, in hope I could bust my way out, I did, and he caught me by the scruff of my neck once more as I tried to wiggle loose when I failed to. My wiggling didn’t work but I also realized he had left himself vulnerable in trying to control me more. Seeing the opportunity, with myself half-cocked and one foot already in the air as I teetered over the pavement, I used my free leg and kicked him right in the crotch as hard as I could. He yelped in pain, let me go, and dropped to his knees in agony. Unfortunately, I guess it had just rained here and I dropped right into a puddle of water. Still, I could hear the angry shouts of the rich man echo off the alleyway walls. “Go! Go after her! Don’t lose her before she gets back to the street!” I then realized that the alleyway had been chosen on purpose by these Bigs. It represented a dark territory for authorities to patrol and while Littles weren’t treated well in the south here, there were still some rules. So, looking ahead and seeing the street only a quick run away, I knew if I could make it, I would at least be safe from them. So, I ran for it. I could hear the panicked thuds and splashes of the shoes running behind me, but I didn’t dare look back until I was safely out of the street once more and touching the Little soldier statue. I stared back defiantly at the three now defeated men before me. Each could have squashed me like a bug, and I felt triumphant as they soon left and vanished into one of the nearby buildings. Unfortunately, my feelings of triumph quickly ended. The mute man, before going back into his hiding place in one of the buildings, sneered at me as he retrieved my suitcase and took it with him. All my clothes, passport, and money were held within that bag. I had my phone still, but now, I was wet, bruised, and penniless in a land in an entirely different dimension other than my own. Still, I felt I had to press on and at least get into the Hotel Eirinison. Unfortunately, as I grimly suspected when I started walking over there, garnering numerous looks of shock and pit from nearly every passing Big on the way, they wouldn’t let me check-in unless I had my passport from the portal travel bureau. As it stood, that single laminated card was in my suitcase and had taken me a month to obtain it back home. Here in this dimension, I heard rumors about where some took three months to get a new one… if they even made it that long. So, on the verge of being destitute, I went back outside and sat on a park bench by a tall radiating fountain. The city shimmered all around me in glorious magnificence and technological might, but I was now trapped in the same scenario I had worked so hard to avoid in the first place. ‘Shit and double shit! What the heck do I do now?’ I cursed my independent attitude prevailing against the advice of the other Bigs. If I had only listened to even one of them now, I might have been safely tucked upstairs in my hotel room planning out the rest of my trip. Instead, I was now outside and in a world of hurt. And it only got worse as I looked around. To my left, I saw a police car and cops get out and detain a clearly homeless Little. They seemed so scared getting hauled into the back of the police cruiser, and I morbidly wondered what waited for them at the station and afterward. I felt a shiver of fear creep up my spine, and though I was nowhere near looking like that particular Little, my scuffle with the three hadn’t left me too much better off. Then to my right though, I saw what looked like a religious service talking to and helping out another homeless Little as they offered them blankets and hot soup. It was unusually cold for early May, even around here, but my partially soaked clothes clung to me tightly and the wind seemed to pass right through them. I would have availed myself of the free service right then, but as I looked at them closer, I recognized the logo on their front smocks as the Acolytes of Artemis. They were a charity organization dedicated to helping the poor and needy Littles of their world. It was a perfectly wonderful calling for many Bigs, but underneath it all, lay the foundations for the ruin of every Little who sought their services. Most, it seemed, were simply lost to the system, and were never seen again. I shook my head at the notion and just wrapped my arms around myself. It provided little, but some comfort. At the same time though, the reality and desperation of my situation began to settle in. I still had my phone, and I could go to the Earth embassy in the city for sanctuary, but the process was always complicated without a passport. It was possible, but it would take time and most Littles weren’t allowed in until they could at least be verified. As a result, many kidnappers were said to be lurking right outside the gates for desperate and unsuspecting Littles. Worse though, here, I knew the embassy was at least 15 blocks away from my hotel. Having just walked nine to get here and being totally exhausted now, I didn’t like my chances. It was all just too much to deal with. I was a strong independent woman. My time on the streets in a crumbling city before I was 13 had taught me a lot, but it was my hometown. I knew each alley to avoid and where the best free food was on garbage days. I had fought my way out of that mess, but now… I felt I had nothing. So, not seeing a way out, I just dropped my head in my hands and began to softly cry. Now, I know I shouldn’t have, but sometimes, emotions just bubble to the surface whether you like it or not. Crying though, and so obviously, I was making myself vulnerable to any passing Big. I was surprised it took longer than five minutes for one to finally stop and slowly sit next to me. “Tissue?” she finally asked with concern in her voice and holding a large single disposable sheet in front of me. I didn’t want to accept the offered item, but I knew my face was probably a mess and I hated to turn down such a generous offer, even if it was a stranger. “Thank you…” I said quietly, trying not to reveal my ruined face to the Big. From my quick glance at her though, I could see her blonde hair practically shining in the day’s sun, and I could see a little hopeful smile play across her lips as I took the tissue from her hand. I then blew my nose and dabbed off my cheeks. “There… much better, huh?” I nodded. “Thank you, uh… sorry, I didn’t get your name.” She smiled and outstretched her hand to mine. “Nancy. Nancy Donahue. Good to meet you…” “Emily. Emily Breckenridge,” I replied, with a smile on my face, shaking her offered hand. I had no doubt that my makeup was ruined, and I still had no plan, but right then, I felt a sense of calm wash over me. Whomever this Big woman was, I felt that things were finally going to turn around for me.

For years I have had overactive bladder and urinary incontinence and have used diapers as a necessity. Symptoms have ranged from leaking after using the restroom at the beginning to uncontrolled wetting now years later. In the past year or so I have had several UTIs one of which hospitalized me last November with a septic blood infection. In March a post voiding scan showed I am retaining 150 to 200 ml of urine in my bladder. Early this month a Cystoscopy and CT scan revealed that my prostate is quite enlarged. My urologist recommend removing my prostate and opening up the bladder neck. The procedure they are doing is HOLEP. It removes the prostate using a Lazer, by separating the prostate glandular material from the outside capsule. My urologist says that depending on the status of my urinary sphincter she could not tell me if my incontinence will improve but the UTIs from retention will be in the past. I told her that fixing the UTI issue was the priority. Here's hoping for the latter.

Cody couldn't believe the humilating position he found himself in. After finding out his college roommate Vincent wears and uses diapers. He told all his classmates. Unfortunately the next morning he found himself strapped down to the his bed naked and standing next to his bed was his college roommate in just a thick diaper. Vincent told him how Cody humiliated him and everybody was calling him diaper boy. Also had girls slap his padded ass or pull back his pants waistband to give him a diaper check. He told Cody how much he loved diapers but it was supposed to be a secret. Now that it was out Cody's roommate decided it's time for some revenge. So he told Cody that now it's time teach him a lesson and that now they will becoming much more closer then just roommates. Vincent was now going to be Cody's master. Cody saw Vincent holding something his hands and then saw it was a chastity cage. Cody's roommate laughed then slowly started to attach the device to Cody's member. Vincent said from now on Cody will do what he says if he ever wants to make cummies ever again but unfortunately Vincent wasn't done with Cody just yet. He climbed on top of Cody then planted his diaper butt right infront of Cody's face. Cody then heard rumbling but it wasn't coming from his tummy. It was Vincent's tummy. Cody knew what his roommate was about to do. Vincent looked back at Cody and smiled then said "I made sure to have a big nice breakfast today. Some taco bell breakfast! Now your going to get a front row seat and get to take a nice whiff of my stinky butt". Cody begged for Vincent not too but it was too late. He heard a huge loud fart echo from Vincent's diaper then heard a big slush of mess enter the diaper. Vincent's diaper butt expanded getting closer and touching Cody's face. Then Vincent lifted up and said "smell the roses" then plopped hid stinky butt on Cody's face! Cody smelled the terrible odor coming from his roommates diaper. After smelling his roommates diaper. Vincent got up and then said "I got a special treat for you. Well two I should say so let's start with a nice warm enema. You better hold it in too. No going or il put my filthy dirty diaper around that head". Vincent grabbed Cody's legs and lifted them up and exposing his butthole. Vincent smiled "Here let me help lube it up" Vincent then tounges Cody's butthole making Cody squirm and get hard. Cody's hard dick strains against the cage and starts to precum like crazy from the rim job. "Daww looks like somebody loves their butt getting attention. If you love that you'll enjoy my toys but we can do that later time for your treat. Bottoms up" Vincent laughs sticking the enema inside Cody and then releasing all into Cody's tight ass. Cody could feel it filling up. He couldn't believe how real this was. He was a Dom not no sissy sub boy. Vincent then took out the enema and then could see Cody squirming. "Now now you better hold it in. Be a good boy for me. You can release it all out once we get your fresh diaper on" his roommate chuckled. Cody eyes widened and begged Vincent not to put a fresh diaper on him. Vincent smiled "hmmm ok fine I won't put you in a fresh diaper then if you say so". Cody felt relieved. Vincent then took off his messy filthy diaper and Cody almost gagged from how bad it smelled but then Cody noticed Vincent lowering the dirty diaper on the bed. And lifting Cody's legs in the air. In Cody's horror he saw Vincent place the monster filthy diaper underneath his butt. Cody then yells "Wait I don't want to wear yours! You said you wernt going to diaper me! Please don't do this!" Vincent then laughed "Well from your words exactly you said you didn't want to wear a fresh diaper. So im giving you what you want. Putting you in a "DIRTY" diaper haha". Vincent then lowered Cody's butt into his messy diaper. Then tapped Cody up. He then untied Cody and them lifted him up and planted Cody on his knee and bounced him just like a baby. So diaper slut how do you like my dirty diaper. Cody didn't say anything he was too grossed out from what was happening but something felt good. He couldn't help but moan. Something about the filthy dirty diaper felt so good. He couldn't explain why. He tried to not enjoy it but his dick strained and precummed more. He just started moaning more and more. "My my somebody really loves my dirty diaper. This is new. I was not expecting you to enjoy this so much. Btw Cody turn around and smile for the camera" Cody turned around and saw a friend of Vincent holding a camera aiming at him and his dirty pampers. Cody tried to cover his face but it was too late. Vincent laughed "Now lets see we got footage of you enjoy my poopy diaper and expressing it on camera. So here's the deal Cody! Your going to be my sissy diaper slut from now on. Every day after class I will diaper you up in a diaper or if your lucky my dirty diaper. And we will have lots of diaper play! If you don't do what I say then the whole school will see this video of you enjoy my dirty diaper! So do we have a deal?" Cody couldn't believe his roommate blackmailed him but he couldn't exact say no. So he agreed to the conditions of his new life to save his dignity. Unfortunately Cody felt a stranger sensation. He forgot about the enema that was given to him and held his tummy. Vincent noticed then said "oh perfect timing looks like you ready to add your own mess to your diaper. Well let's get you to the couch and get the camera set up. One video isn't enough. Got to have a backup just incase. But before that let me just quickly draw on the back of your diaper" After Vincent drew on Cody's diaper, he took him to the couch then Vincent put on his pup hood. And place Cody over his lap. Then the camera started recording and perfectly on time. Cody started to fill his already filthy diaper with his own stinky poo. The diaper surprisingly held it all. Then Vincent started to rub Cody's diaper butt squishing all the poo that was mixed against his butt. The mess started to move towards the front. And Cody started to moan from the rubbing. The camera captured it all even the drawing on Cody's diaper butt that said "diaper loading" with a bar half colored in with a 79% written under the bar. Cody couldn't believe that this was his new life now! He better be lucky that Vincent doesn't start making him wear diapers to class.

and billed before shipped.

Thank you! 🙂

I see London, I see Jaipur. I see her baby diaper.

I've had diapers around since my wife and I met. I've had pee issues my whole life. She's not into them herself, but knows of my love for them. I wear to bed every night, and am 24/7 on the weekends. If we go out, I'm diapered. I put them on and change in front of her. They are not part of our sex life...sadly. She has worn a couple of times years ago, and she looks great in a diaper. All that being said, I could not and would not stay with a partner that would not allow me to have this in my life. I think it would say a lot about someone if they refused to allow me to be me. On many forums I read posts from members that are miserable because the s.o. won't "allow" it. I just don't understand that. How can someone "allow/not allow" you to do what brings you joy? I look at all the other valuable things we each bring to our relationship. Neither one of us would throw that away over the absobancy level of my underwear. Sorry for the rant.

Omg I love the fight scene, even if there's 3 more bad guys there then in the game 😂

shit, didn't know things have been so rough. I donated 20$ for you

Hiii! Welcome!

Hiii! Welcome!

What do you mean tie my shoes? I can't even read yet! Lol, but nah, only shoes that have ties are my work ones, which are really just a nice black pair of filas with ankle support, they don't make work shoes my size.. I am still in size 5 to 6 boys.. thanks to a leg issue which affects my feet

I completely agree with BP on his very accurate quote, I understand how much work goes into writing stories/books and I don’t think that you should not be paid if the story is worth paying for, but a teaser or basically a advertisement for free is in bad taste, I actually have no idea how much money this type of thing would generate but I think at bare minimum you should consider a contribution to the site. Or the occasional free complete short story.

@PeculiarChangeling I absolutely loved this story!! It was so meta and so sci-fi. For a second I thought you had sent AI into Academy M. I was like out of the frying pan and into the fire if she enters Judith’s body 😂 Figured it would have been a day where Maria was off globe trotting or visiting an Academy. Totally amazing to have her enter into Mia’s girlfriend’s body. Can’t wait to read more of your works!! I’m so excited to read the hell Kikmy is going to put AI through.

I have two of Nanny Chloe's stories sitting in my Kindle file. She's a good writer, but I have to agree that what she has done here is in bad taste. She has not been on this site since May of 2019. At least the other authors who promote the paid versions of their stories are active members of the community, and even if it's time delayed, do put their stories here for free. Become an active member of this community, and you are much less likely to get negative feedback for this sort of thing.

Interesting that not long after you posted that I received their latest email. And there was this.... And at first, my brain registered this where it says trimmer fit: I'm guessing my brain registered that as saying the new fit is total shit.

I Luvs this comment.

Size 1 (5 items) Diapers, pacifier, bottle, bib, onesie. Size 2 (10items) Size 1, plus sleeper, changing pad, skirtall or shortall, romper, stuffy. Size 3 (20 items) Size 2, plus crib, changing table, playpen, highchair, bouncer, toys, baby gym, rocking horse, harness, nanny.

Hey everyone! Congrats to everyone for making it to about the halfway point in this story. I feel this chapter is very appropriate to mark that point in this story, but things are about to get a lot more interesting. Also, I just want to note that I could have dedicated a lot of time to this next chapter. Originally, it was going to be three separate chapters, but then I realized that it might get a little tiresome plot wise. In that same vein, I know I could have drastically simplified Emma’s thoughts or language, but that makes for a pretty boring or near incomprehensible chapter, so I elected not to in this case. I think the end result works and makes for a much more interesting read. Also, minor spoiler here, but Dash does show up in this chapter as an actual character. Nancy doesn’t know his name, so he’s not named, but I just want to put it out there. Namely, I want to note it first because considering the number of views this story has already garnered, I’m assuming some of you may not have read my previous story. As such, basically just remember that toys come alive when not being watched. I won’t commit to if its magic or whatever, but keep in mind that toys only reveal themselves to Littles in dire circumstances or when they believe they won’t be noticed. It’s not a big part of this story, focusing on Emma and all, but just in case anyone gets confused, that’s the reason for some elements occurring in this chapter. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 8: Nothingness, a Doggy, and a Bond The trappings of my life soon became just that. I was a prisoner in my own mind. I didn’t want much anymore and everything around me became fuzzy… unclear as to what was going on. At first, I mourned the loss, but soon, I took comfort in the peace and safety my new life afforded me. I knew it was a dangerous path to head down but considering all that had happened and that I now felt practically all alone in this world, it just felt like a good alternative to what could have occurred to me. See, when Littles sometimes ‘break,’ as I did, we tended to go down one of two routes. Most just regressed their own minds and became mentally like babies from then on out. Recovery was possible but challenging and usually a failure. For me, however, I had gone the other way and I had become locked within my own mind. The major problem of this route for Littles was that their already fragile mind often would regress from sheer disuse or the inability to fight off anyone as they approached with something to further harm or regress them. Unfortunately, I was already starting to feel these atrophied effects take hold of me. While I knew that Nurse Bee’s special shot and whatever happened afterward with the pain in my head could be blamed for some of the problems I was now experiencing, I also knew that the more time trapped in my own mind was now severely degrading it. It wasn’t long before my needs became simple. My emotions were always in flux but my communication with them became very limited as well. A gurgle meant I was happy. Crying meant I was uncomfortable. And anything else that occurred outside my mind was just a physical manifestation of my own body. Even my memory seemed to fade with time. Concepts I had known for years all began to vanish. At first, I was so scared. Imagine forgetting your parents’ faces or the home you grew up in. Time seemed to just not matter anymore though, and it didn’t take long for me to not even mind that something was lost anymore. After all, if I couldn’t remember it, I couldn’t mourn it. Holes were left in my memory, but as the holes started to become the majority of what I could remember, one hole was just as sad, or meaningless, as the next. At some point, I just stopped caring. Between that and my near-constant need for sleep and other basic needs, my life soon merged into a routine. By the end of the second day, I had nearly lost all track of time and the only things I could recognize were those things that continued to be mentioned. Daycare, Nancy, Emma, diaper, messy… things like that, but most of those words had little meaning for me anymore. And each time I closed my eyes to sleep once again, I found I was missing more. I knew it wasn’t long before my current life was all I knew. I would live in the moment, not caring about what was next or what had just happened. Every time I had that thought though, my eyes soon closed once more as I fell asleep in my crib. * * * Nancy looked down at me and I cooed over seeing her face again. I wasn’t sure who ‘Nancy’ was exactly, but she was a pretty lady who kept me fed, warm, and clean. To me, that’s what mattered. “Who’s my Little snookums, huh? Is someone ready to go to daycare?” she asked, clearly not expecting a sophisticated answer back. As usual, I cooed back in response. “I’ll take that as a yes!” Her smile was infectious, and she played with my feet for a moment, before picking me up and taking me to the car. I didn’t like the car or my car seat, so I began to fuss. “Oh, honey. I know you don’t like this thing, but I need to get you to daycare and…” Her phone began to ring, and I started to fuss more as she turned her head away from me. “Oh, shoot! That’s work. I’ve got to take this, sweetie. I’m sorry.” She then popped her phone out. “Hello? Yes, Greg. I’ll be there in a little bit… No, I know that you all wanted me there early, but I just can’t with Emma…” Nancy seemed all upset and I got a little upset as well. I had no idea who Greg was, but I just wanted her attention back on me. She tried to play with my feet from a distance, but it just wasn’t the same. Nancy noticed. “Look Greg, I have to go… I didn’t regress her. You think I wanted this? She’s wonderful and all, but…” She looked back at me with a sad face and then quieted her voice. I could still hear her though. “It’s not my fault. The daycare screwed her up and taking care of a near newborn is hard enough. She had a blowout this morning and… yes… yes… I understand. I will be there as soon as I can…” Sighing, Nancy then hung up and turned her attention back to me. “Sorry, baby. I needed to take that but come on. I’ve got to take you to daycare pronto.” Seeing her attention pop back to me, I only cooed again. She smiled and I tried to as well, but I just heard a little farting noise instead. ‘Weird…’ Nancy tickled me a little bit and then left. Just as I was about to cry out though, she popped back in front of me, so everything was good. She even made this big noise with what we were in, and I cooed over the rattling I now felt in my body. Smiling back at me, Nancy turned on some of what she called ‘music.’ I wasn’t really sure what it was, but I just knew I liked it. So, I cooed back at her again. What felt like a thousand years later, Nancy stopped, disappeared for a moment, but then reappeared and picked me up. I cooed at her touch, but before I could really feel her closeness, I was given to someone else. I began to distress a little. “Sorry, Diana for the late drop-off,” Nancy apologized. “She had a blowout and I hate to drop and run, but I’ve really gotta go now.” The woman, Diana I guess, nodded and raised up my hand a little. “That’s okay, Nancy. We’ve got her now. You run off back to your job.” Nancy then waved at us and took off. Diana waved my already raised hand back to her and it felt kind of funny. I felt I had a new ability as my hand flopped about. It was so cool, but Diana stopped and just sighed. “Well, I guess I best get you settled Emma. No need to wait around out here…” I started to distress a bit, but Diana soon started bouncing me a little in her arms. It was actually kind of fun and I cooed a little bit during the process. Before we had even moved much further though, this one tiny person came up to us. “Miss Dee-Dee! Miss Dee-Dee!” she called out. ‘Who’s Miss Dee-Dee?’ Diana looked down at her though. “Yes, Lilly. Is there something I can help you with?” Lilly, I guess, nodded her head and clutched the doll in her hands more tightly. “When’s Emma gonna come back an’ play with us? Is she any better?” Diana started responded back, though I still wasn’t sure what was happening on whether she was really Diana, Miss Dee-Dee, or was just a special person and had two names. ‘Do I have two names?’ Diana shook her head to Lilly’s question. “I’m sorry, Lilly, but Emma here is on a different level than you are now. She might come back, but you need to be prepared that she might not.” Lilly seemed to listen but then quickly looked distressed and tried pulling my foot from her position below me. “Emma! Emma! Please talk to me! Please! You gotta wake up!” Diana moved me away and pulled Lilly away from me before waving over to a new woman. “Easy, Lilly. You need to stop that. There’s nothing any of us can do now, so you just need to accept this. Until then, Miss Mindy here is going to take care of you, okay?” By now though, Lilly was crying, and I started to get a little distressed myself. “Oh dear,” Diana said as she started to bounce me around again. “Guess someone needs their morning nap and a feed.” My cries stopped and I cooed back. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” Diana then waved to Miss Mindy and Lilly as the two hugged each other. Lilly was still crying, and she seemed so familiar, but the prospect of getting fed quickly snapped my mind off the brief thought. That cycle repeated for a long time after. Maybe a year, or a month… a day… actually, I wasn’t really too sure on the who concept of time anymore, but it felt like a long time. Regardless, nothing changed. I would wake in the morning, Nancy would drop me off and would get more upset every day with me, I would come to daycare and go through that cycle, and then I would be taken home where I would go to sleep again. It was all a routine, but a pleasant one at that. My world had shrunk very nicely and despite Nancy and others seeming distressed around me occasionally, I just kind of accepted my life. It felt safe and easy. But I guess life never stays that way though, and soon, I finally felt like I was cracking up. That patchwork-like stuffed dog that seemed somewhat familiar had wandered into my crib in the Burrows room… and yes, I know how it sounds, but I swear they walked right up to me and even spoke to me. I just assumed it was a dream, but he kept doing it with such vigor that it almost frightened me. Stuffy’s are just not supposed to talk. It’s almost a basic law of nature, ‘I think?’ but after a few more times, I kind of just accepted his presence as he snuggled down next to me after trying to get me to talk for the millionth time. I mean, even if I wanted to or could for that matter, what would I even say to a stuffy come to life? ‘Hi, my name is Emma. You are supposed to be an inanimate object and you’re probably possessed or I’m going crazy… more than what’s normal for what I’ve been through that is. Want to be friends?’ Something like that just didn’t happen, and I kinda just accepted the funny-looking but soft stuffy into my life. On top of that though, I began to realize I almost had a superpower of sorts. I couldn’t fly like the birdies outside or be strong like Nancy was, but I heard everything when most people thought I was just a shell of who I was. I was already seeing the stuffy come to life, but I saw so much more as well. I couldn’t really retain anything, but nonetheless, I still heard everything in the moment at least. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Gillies,” Miss Dee-Dee said while the other large scary woman looked down at me in the crib. I had since managed to remember Miss Dee-Dee’s name and I was so proud of myself. It was small, but I felt like such a big girl for remembering that she was called two names. Two was a big number after all. “She hasn’t changed since Tulia brought her in last week.” “Then I want you to do something different with her. Nancy is threatening to sue us or leave, and because it’s disrupting her work, they’re backing her up as well,” Mrs. Gillies, I guess, said harshly to Miss Dee-Dee. For once, I swear that Miss Dee-Dee seemed scared herself. “But it’s not my fault, Mrs. Gillies…” Miss Dee-Dee tried to defend herself. “It wasn’t my medicine that made her this way. It’s Brit…” “It’s Nurse Bee around here, Diana,” Mrs. Gillies rudely interrupted Miss Dee-Dee. I really wanted to defend my kind carer around here, but I could only just coo and let out a little fart instead. ‘It’s so funny when I do that… Miss Dee-Dee always changes me afterward and blows kisses on my tummy. It tickles!’ I paused, realizing I had lost track of what was being said above me. ‘Shoot! She’s saying something again.’ “…I know it’s really hard to work under these conditions, Diana, but we have rules for the staff here as well for a good reason. You know that, or do I have to remind you again?” “N… no, m… ma’am,” Miss Dee-Dee stuttered out. “I don’t n… need a reminder…” Mrs. Gillies smiled and rubbed Miss Dee-Dee’s shoulder. “That’s very good, Diana. It’s for your own good. Trust me. I’ll talk to Nurse Bee tonight and see if we can’t figure out this little glitch of hers. I think I can calm down Nancy and get to accept everything, but I’d prefer not to have to do that for other caregivers. Six Littles ending up like this is too much and you know I don’t like this type of outcome for our Littles.” Miss Dee-Dee nodded. “Yes ma’am. Of course.” Both looked down on me, smiled, and then walked out of my view. I was more than a little confused of what I had just heard, but I felt there was a big problem with someone called ‘Nurse Bee.’ I don’t think that Mrs. Gillies or Miss Dee-Dee wanted me this way, so maybe I had two other people on my sid… ‘Oh! Another toot! Feels so funny! Everything feels so squishy now! Squishy time! Squishy time!’ I cooed a little in my crib. The stuffy dog would be here any moment and Miss Dee-Dee would come back and remove my squishiness and… ‘Wait… wasn’t I just thinking about something that was said? Done to me?’ I really tried to remember, but another little toot came from all my straining to think. ‘Oh well. I guess if it was really important, I would have remembered it…’ So, all that kept happening. I would see something, panic and think about it, but then forget about it just as quickly. I might remember some of it later, which is the only reason that I could retain anything, but the most I could piece together was that Miss Dee-Dee and Mrs. Gillies wanted to help me out and were sorry and Nurse Bee was bad… I guess. Again, all super fuzzy, but like most things, I just had to live with it. It seemed that would be my life forever, but my new stuffed companion apparently just kept coming to me. Oddly, during one of the visits, I swear I heard a voice in my head and life in my limbs for the first time in forever… a week… a day ago? I really didn’t know, but it was there, or at least it was for a moment. I tried after, but only managed to make out another little fart. Now, I had never had a toy before… at least I think so, so I wasn’t sure why I kept getting this strong urge to hug this stuffy that kept dropping by. He certainly wasn’t new, and his stitching almost scared me, but he stuck by me. No matter what; diaper change, bottle feeding, cries… everything. He would always hide when Miss Dee-Dee or Miss Tully came to check on me and calm me down, but he was always back soon after. It wasn’t much, but he was someone I could cling to and rely on to be there for me in this place. So, when he came back to me one day and laid down for a while after I had arrived at the daycare late again, I didn’t really think anything of it, but was just glad he was here again. Almost instantly though, I heard something again buzzing in my head, but unlike the other times, I could almost make out most of the words. “Wake up… wake up… no one is upset with you… you are a good girl… just wake up…” just started playing over and over in my head. At first, I couldn’t make much of it out, but when I concentrated, by the third time it went through my head, I could hear almost as if someone were directly talking to me. Having just woken up from a nap, I could have sworn it was all just part of a dream, but as my eyes began to flutter open more to their still semi-relaxed awakened state, I heard something new this time. “Emma… wake up, Emma. Wake up for me… show me something… please, Emma… I will protect you… I will make it all okay… just please wake up…” I began to get excited. Hallucination or not, the patched stuffy dog seemed to be trying to reach out to me. There was no one else her, so it just had to be him. Being so far set adrift in a world of nothingness, it was something, so when he walked away from me again, I didn’t like it. So, I tried to muster all the strength I had inside and tried to will myself to do… say anything. Finally, I let out an “Uhhh…” The stuffy stopped and looked back over at me. First, I was elated that he had stopped. Even more though, second, I had made a noise. Having basically just been a passenger in my body for so long… ‘Maybe?’ I still wasn’t sure about things like that, but to me, all this now almost seemed like a miracle. I watched as the stuffy moved closer to me. He almost seemed just as relieved as I was, but as quickly as he turned around to see me again, he began walking away again. Not wanting for any of these miraculous new sensations or ability to go away, I let out another “Uhhh…” Again, the stuffy whipped back around to see me. I wanted him to do anything just so I could test more of myself out. Perhaps it was just a fluke, and I had some bad gas, always possible with a Little, but I just hoped it was something more… something longer lasting. ‘Had I finally found my exit from this locked-in state?’ Curiously though, instead of speaking to me, the stuffy only stared back for a while and then began to gather the blanket around me into a large pile halfway between me and the bars of the crib. In an instant, he went from looking at me to disappearing completely. I began to panic. ‘Where had he gone? He was right there! Is he a magic dog? Do I have some special magic dog just floating around and that’s why he can talk, walk, and I can hear him mentally?’ I wasn’t sure at all, but I definitely knew I wanted him back. So, frustrated, I dug deep and let out another “Uhhh…” To my relief, he popped out from behind the bunched pile he had formed. I still wondered if he was a magical stuffy, but I just cared that he was back again. Suddenly, I felt an odd sensation on my face. It was moving, near on its own and felt like it did when I cooed lately, but I still felt confused as to what it was. Seconds later though, my mind clicked into place and a deep memory popped to the surface and I realized I had no reason to panic. I wasn’t in danger. I was just smiling! Everything felt so joyous, and I just wanted to hug my new magical stuffy so badly. Moreover, I just wanted anything to happen to keep this progress going, and as if he could read my thoughts, his mouth slowly opened. “Emma…” My heart leapt for joy, and I felt myself smile even more. My magical stuffy spoke! I hadn’t just imagined it all, and I wanted to see or to hear more, but I was just so happy that a change felt like it was in the air. And, as if all that wasn’t enough, my magical stuffy walked over to me and nuzzled into my chest. Not being able to do much, but still wanting to acknowledge what he had done, I tilted my body a bit right into him. He didn’t say anything this time, but he seemed happy. That happened for a little while longer, but I could see that he almost looked like he wanted more. As if to confirm my theory, he then leaned over near to my face and looked right into my eyes. “Emma… you’re safe with me. I can be your friend if you want, but just please come out of the darkness. Come back to us, Emma…” As if a key had suddenly been turned, I felt new life within me. Sensations I had forgotten long ago came flooding back to me. My eyes, once so lifeless and still except for the keenest of observers, began to open wider as I looked back at my magical stuffy. “Oh Emma…” he said breathlessly. Everything felt so good… so new and exciting. I wanted to embrace it all and to my surprise, I even began to be able to wiggle about as my body started to awaken once more. It still wasn’t much, and I couldn’t win a race against a snail most likely, but even a little bit of something was still more as compared to when I had nothing. It was an absolutely perfect moment and I had never felt such joy in my life, or at least that’s what I assumed right then. But then something clicked within me. Now, just to be clear, as my faint recollections of my past began to flood in, I started to remember the basic stuff first since I had become like this. I remembered names and faces for the first time since all this began. Who they were was still hazy and I maybe could tell you the difference between the days, but the memories were slowly coming back. And while all that felt wonderful, I realized just how boring my life had become. It was a series of feedings, naps, diaper changes, and being hauled from one location to another. In all my memories, I could only remember being in this daycare, Nancy’s house, and her… ‘Car? Yes… car…’ I had the faintest sense there was more to life than that, but it was just beyond my fingertips. Still though, it was there, and it made me want more. Which is when I realized that I used to have more… and lost it. I wasn’t sure, how, why, or when at that moment, but I just knew I did. Seeing myself lying in this crib and being excited to do more than fart or cry was a serious blow to my happiness. My previous wiggles quickly stopped, and though I was getting my memories back, I was still very much the person I had become. So, with my emotions still in flux and triggered so easily, I broke… again. I deeply worried that this new issue would break me as it had before. I felt all the same sensations surrounding me and the loss that each of them meant. Everything felt so distant, but the images were still there of at least who I used to be on a large scale. I couldn’t remember things like street names or where I was a year ago but faces and things that I had done were becoming much clearer, so my loss now felt even worse. And, when all that began to fade again, I panicked even more. Tears flowed from my eyes, and I would have given anything to stop myself. I wanted an out, but I didn’t see anything. I was in the same room and even the same crib with the same sense of loss. I felt myself plummeting toward the abyss once more, but then I opened my eyes, and through the tears, I saw one difference: my magical stuffy. Hoping and wishing beyond and harder than I ever had before, I willed the last of my being into my arms and shot them straight out to what felt like the most recent constant in my life. I could have missed, and everything would have been over… but I didn’t. My hands clasped around his soft fury body, and I brought him right into my chest as tightly as I could. My tears were horrible, and I surely thought someone was going to help me, but no one ever came. Miss Dee-Dee, Miss Tully, or the volunteers here must have been on break or something, but that still left me. My magical stuffy was wonderful, but I just wasn’t sure if even he was enough. Suddenly though, like before, I heard something float through my head. “Easy, Emma… calm down and relax… listen to my messages… feel them… hear them… relax…” Surprised, but so relieved, I could feel my sobs began to fade out of nowhere. I knew it had to be my magical stuffy, and as such, I felt he was truly magical, so I hugged him even tighter. I felt a little fuzzy and sleepy right then, but at least my cries began to simmer. I had no idea what was happening, but as I gazed down to my magical stuffy, I just felt I had finally found the peace I was looking for. Never wanting to part with him again, I hugged him closer with one arm, but curiously, my other snaked up and my thumb planted itself right in my mouth. Never having the strength to do so before or the desire before all this, it was an odd and yet wonderous feeling. I never wanted it to leave my mouth again, but as my eyes drifted closed, I just felt happy that maybe, just maybe, I could find my way back to who I used to be. * * * Later that night, I was feeling much better, especially after I was able to wiggle my fingers after my nap, but back home, I could see that Nancy was in another one of her moods. I had been distressingly ripped away from my magical stuffy when she picked me up and now, amidst all the chaos, I desperately wanted him back. Further, having remembered some of my past now, I sadly knew that today wasn’t the first time that Nancy had come home upset. Remembering other times, I didn’t know much, but I knew I was a burden to her lately with the lack of my current abilities that she now had to deal with. Still, after my bath, I was snuggled into my jammies for the night and brought downstairs by a now calmer Nancy to my relief. I sat on her lap as we watched Squares and Letters, a show dedicated to younger Littles like me. There wasn’t much of a plot, and I drifted in and out from time to time, but tonight at least informed me, when I correctly guessed what a square was, that I was slowly getting better. Unfortunately, in the middle of the show, Nancy got a call, and I was placed into my bouncer carrier seat nearby to still watch the TV. “Yes, hello sir… no sir, I just got home and…” Her face quickly changed to one of concern and worry. “No sir, I didn’t mean to leave before my meeting was over but Emma and… I understand sir but I really need to… yes sir… yes, I understand that Littlecare is important to the company, but I need to find a way to make things work… yes sir… yes sir, I’ll be in early tomorrow morning… goodnight, sir…” Nancy then hung the phone and seemed like she was about ready to cry. I wanted more than anything to comfort Nancy right then, but as things were, I could remember what had just happened and that Nancy was having work troubles, however, that was about it. Right as I thought she was about to burst into tears though, her head snapped towards me. “You…” I had never seen her so angry before, let alone have it directed right toward me. With my newly rediscovered perception of the world though, I was never more scared in this house than right then. “You… you were punished by the daycare. I read the report, and you did this to yourself!” she spat at me. I could see the tears begin to drip down her face and I knew she was just speaking out of anger and frustration over everything, but I was genuinely shocked over what I was seeing now. “Mrs. Gillies said it was an accident and that you really couldn’t be held responsible for your actions, but ever since you came here, you’ve defied everything!” To emphasize her point, Nancy had even thrown her hands up in the air. “I mean, ever since that first day I met you… it’s just all been about you. You never thought any of us Bigs were right, and now, look at you! Probably can’t even tell if you’re wet or messy right now as compared to before. I bet if I checked, not even that long after I just changed you, you would at least be a little wet!” I wiggled just a tiny amount to see if I was wet, but I really couldn’t tell if I was or not anymore. I suspected that would take a long time to come back… if at all. “And now… I’m stuck with practically a newborn! What got into me to take you in? I must have been out of my mind when I did it. I should just return you to the foster home…” She paused and stomped her foot on the ground. “Damn it! They probably wouldn’t even take you anymore. You’re just a lost cause to pretty much everyone now. Ten years ago, newborns were all the rage, but now? I might as well give you freely to the institution up the street!” It was all a lot to process. I could tell this had been building up for some time, but to hear it all in one fell swoop… I felt like right on the cusp of everything turning back to normal between us, now, was crashing down all around me. For all I knew, in a week I would be locked up with the rest of the deformed or mentally damaged Littles in the nearby state institution. I still couldn’t remember much, but Garden Gate Hospital stood out in my mind as a place to avoid at all costs if any of the rumors there were true. So, tired, emotionally drained from my long and trying day, and now verbally assaulted by and scared of Nancy, my seemingly whole world yet who now seemed set on giving me away, my emotions simply gave way. I tried to hold them back but considering the earlier smile I had managed still felt like a miracle, I was useless to keep from bursting into tears. Unfortunately, Nancy was still upset at me and her whole life now. She tried to ignore me at first. She even walked away and plugged her ears at one point, but I could tell it was no use. I could see hatred and desperation in her eyes. “Shut up! Shut up! Just shut up!” she lashed out at me. It was a terrible moment, but even through the blur of my own tears, I could see that Nancy was at her wits end as well and crying herself. For a moment, she even seemed shocked herself over what she had just said out loud to my poor tiny crying form and cupped her hands over her mouth and shook her head. She didn’t mean her words tonight, and I could see it in her eyes. It still didn’t take their sting or the fear they induced away from my heart, but it was something. It was something even more to see though as she leaped out and grabbed me up. “Oh baby! Baby! Please! Shhh, shhh. I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry!” she lamented as she began to rub my back and bounce me around. I wasn’t sure I was emotionally ready to forgive her, but my infantile Little instincts were in the drivers seat still and began to lull my cries away. “Shhh, shhh, honey. I’m so, so sorry, Emma. I’m just so stressed. Easy there. Easy. I’ve got you.” My cries continued to quiet down. “There, there. You’re safe. No one’s going to hurt you. No one’s going to take you away. I was just upset, and I didn’t mean all that.” She then paused and sat on the couch as she transferred into more of a cradling position with me looking back up at her. “I don’t even know if you can understand me. I wish you could speak, but if you can still think, I’m just so sorry.” I probably could have said something, maybe even a ‘na’ for her name by now, but I decided to keep quiet still. I wanted to hear what she had to say first. “I took you in as a friend, but I didn’t think of the future. I should have and that’s on me. You were just an adult in your old life. All our commercials say otherwise, but I could see your intelligence when you read at least… then all that got taken away. Slowly, you turned into this… and I just wasn’t ready.” She paused for a moment and looked away briefly at some of my babyish equipment and toys that now littered her family room. “I should have talked to my friends more about you and what to expect, but I didn’t. I should have talked to my boss more, but I didn’t. That’s on me, and there’s no excuse. Punished or not, you put your trust in me, and I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I still don’t know if you can understand me, but maybe show me a sign if you can? Please, baby… something… anything…” I debated for a second if I should just let her wallow in her torment longer, as words didn’t always heal other words said before, but I saw the genuine look of apology and regret in her eyes. I saw the longing for forgiveness the most though, so, having a little more control over my body now, I decided to smile back at her. Not even questioning my newly required ability, Nancy lit up. “Oh honey! Thank you! I don’t know if that’s maybe even just gas, but I’ll take what I can get. Come here, baby!” She then held me close and began to rock me back and forth as she hummed a pleasant and familiar tune. I couldn’t place it for the life of me, but I was just happy over our shared tiny moment. Everything remained like that in such peace and quiet… but then my stomach began to growl. I just ate when I came home, but I guessed my stomach needed what it needed. Nancy quickly noticed. “Oh! I think someone’s stomach just growled at me, huh?” She then slightly adjusted me and prodded around with my diapered rear. “Hmmm… not messy, and you’re probably not uncomfortable, but what about being hungry? Do you want some food maybe?” She looked back at me and knowing my own needs and having the ability to communicate a little better, I smiled back at her. She chuckled. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” She stood up and walked away from the family room couch, stepping over a few of my leftover items on the floor. “Come on, baby. Let’s get you fed.” I was so happy. We were communicating much better now and Nancy felt like she was finally accepting who I was as a Little now. I wasn’t sure how long the peace would last, and I still had a long way to go myse… ‘Wait… where are we going?’ I watched as Nancy slowly walked me back upstairs instead of the kitchen to fetch me a jar of pureed Littlefood or to warm a bottle up. As we entered my nursery, I at least knew where we were going, but I still wasn’t sure why. Like the rest of my life, as we entered, my eyes were confronted with the notion that my room had changed as well. Unlike other Littles though, whose rooms were changed out of spite or humiliation most of the time, mine was changed out of necessity. The rocking chair was new, but comfortable whenever Nancy read me a story. The books, no longer read by me, or even held by me, had grown simplistic and overly colorful. A changing table, crib, and my wardrobe had all changed as well and everything had now been bathed in pink, purples, or some kind of pastels that blended in nicely. It was a wonderfully comfortable room, but I was still confused why we were up here to feed me. Sitting down in the rocking chair and cradling me back in her arms, Nancy didn’t seem satisfied with my position for far longer than normal. Once she stopped moving me around though, I was too low to be read to, yet too high to be spanked. It was extremely comfortable though, and I felt I could even doze off quite easily, but I still had to question it all in the first place. ‘Had Nancy finally cracked like I did? Couldn’t I have just been fed before she did though?’ As if to punctuate my pressing concern my stomach rumbled again. Nancy smiled down at me. “You know… Mrs. Gillies and I have been talking for a while now. She’s been a big help in making sure you were cared for with your new disabilities, but she’s been slowly suggesting other things that could help us bond better. One, I even bought pills for, but as it turned out, coincidentally, I found out I didn’t even need them a few days ago. I wasn’t sure if to tell you or not, but I think as a kind of recommitment from me to you, I should tonight.” I was still confused, but my eyes bugged out in further confusion as Nancy began to unbutton her shirt. I could feel the heat radiating off her body and I hoped that’s where it would all end. It didn’t though and I froze in shock as she unbuttoned a clasp on her bra and revealed her chest fully to me. “See baby… I’ve been thinking that I should become something more for you. I’ve just been torn between my work and home life lately, but tonight, I realized I really should be focusing on you. You need me right now, and if my job doesn’t understand in this world, I will just find another. After all, it’s not every day I try to start being a mommy to my Little now, is it?” she asked down to me. Her words were full of tenderness and her touch was as soft as ever, but I saw a twinkling of some kind in her eyes. I wasn’t sure what it was at first, but I soon realized that it was desire. She had shown it before, but now, her desire was to care for me and to be my new mommy. Yesterday, I might have just cooed at the idea, but today, I felt very different. Unfortunately, once again tonight, my Little babyish instincts began to take over right then. Maybe it was the smell coming off Nancy or the sight of her exposed nipples, but still without much control over my body, my face began to head right for her chest without question or much resistance. Being fully aware of everything and still feeling that something was off, though I couldn’t quite place it, I could only view my actions as an outside observer in silent horror. See, while my memory was still fragmented, I did remember a few things about Bigs and Littles, namely about breastfeeding. Just the situation in general was the stuff of most Littles nightmares, but there were also several facts about it, all interesting to observe but not necessarily witness firsthand. Chiefly though, I remembered something about the hormones in women Bigs specifically. Breastfeeding tended to form a bond they couldn’t break. It was similar for Littles, but the bond formed in half the time for Bigs. Worse, the bond tended to come with a few side effects, namely a change in the personalities of the women feeding their Littles. As my lips wrapped around her nipple, I could do nothing but watch in terror and panic over what was going to happen next. Horrifyingly, as my still regressed instincts took over, I found myself growing attached to the milky substance now trickling down my throat. It was difficult at first, and occasionally Nancy would wince and tell me “No teeth,” but my body just seemed to want more of the wonderous liquid. For her part, Nancy only just cooed at me and stroked my hair in clear contentment. Buried deep, I felt the liquid almost tasted like a milkshake and was the best thing I had ever consumed, but my newly awakened mind burned with the shock of everything that was going on. Before today, everything seemed boring but routine. I could have mapped the next years of my life out with no problem. Once I had awakened though, everything now felt like it was so up in the air. Nancy seemed so much more set on becoming my mommy, but conversely, I felt certain that I wanted more in this life. I wanted to run, play, and jump outside. I knew my path back was difficult, if not impossible, but my goals were still there. As I began to drift off and Nancy just continued to smile in near pure bliss down at me though, I had no idea if her possible new personality would even allow me to. No matter what, I just felt the tremendous weight of the future bearing down on me and all the uncertainties and challenges I was sure to face. For now, though, I just drifted off as I continued to suck down the creamy liquid.

AN OFFER HE CAN'T REFUSE “Please rise.” The bailiff scanned the courtroom, making sure that everyone had got the message. “This court is now in session,” he intoned; “the Honorable Judge Thomas Reynolds presiding." “Be seated,” the judge commanded as he spread his black robe and took his seat. Looking around the courtroom, he took the measure of the five defendants, and then shifted his gaze to the District Attorney. “Mister Ballstrom, I'm surprised to see you here this morning. What have we got?” “Solicitation, Your Honor,” the DA said in a conversational tone. “The Public Defender has agreed to a pleading on behalf of all five of the defendants.” “I see … or rather, I don't. Mister Ballstrom, in the immortal words of the Rolling Stones, The Under Assistant West Coast Promotion Man could have adjudicated this matter. So, I ask again: what brings you to my little corner of the world?” “It's the next matter on the docket, Your Honor. It's rather unusual.” The judge looked down at the paperwork in front of him, then looked back up. “I see what you mean. Forty one defendants … multiple acts of related and unrelated theft … conspiracy … aiding and abetting … what did they steal?” “Diapers, Your Honor.” “Diapers?” Judge Reynolds gave Q-Ball one of those looks that suggested his sanity was in question. “Are you serious?” “Yes, Your Honor. We have one count involving theft from a local hospital, but the other victims were clients of a local business, the Lullaby Diaper Service. Unbeknownst to the thieves, Your Honor, the owner of this establishment is a local businessman of some renown-- one Vincent Belmondo.” The judge leaned back in his chair and let out a deep sigh as he began looking over the spectators. A few were familiar faces, elderly citizens seeking live entertainment in lieu of the televised sort, but he spotted Spats in the back row. The gangster was attended by his attorney, a slimeball of the first order whose name the judge could not recall, and an equally slimy flunky who bore an amazing resemblance to the late Toothpick Charlie. Spats appeared to be studying the back of Julia Canon's head, spearing her with one of those sinister looks that suggested a man trying to figure out where to park the ice pick. It was anybody's guess what the Canons were doing in his courtroom-- the Canons and Chief Mischof. Adding to the mystery, the Chief was flanked by a nicely dressed, middle aged woman on his left, and a well dressed young man on his right. And Priscilla Canon has her left hand firmly planted on the young man's thigh. Interesting … “Will Hercule Poirot be testifying for the prosecution?” “No, Your Honor. There are witnesses, but I do not believe that it will be necessary to call them.” “I see,” Reynolds said, although in reality he didn't see at all. “Well, then, let's get this show on the road. Miss Kaplan, how do your clients plead to a single count of solicitation each?” “Guilty, Your Honor,” the Public Defender declared. Reynolds sadly shook his head. “Ruby, I'm surprised at you. By now, I should have thought that you knew every officer and sheriff's deputy in the five country area. Are you losing your touch?” “No, Your Honor; they brought in a bunch of ringers. State troopers.” “Fair enough,” he smiled. “Mister Ballstrom, what have the two of you worked out?” “A five hundred dollar fine, Your Honor, and forty-five days in County, which will keep them out of our hair over the holidays.” “So ordered,” the Judge declared as he brought his gavel down with a commendable thump. “Next case!” Leaning still farther back in his chair, he began gently swiveling to left and right while while waiting for Ruby Montpelier and her friends to exit, and a gaggle of forty one new defendants to take their place. Forty one defendants in one courtroom … this has got to be one for the Guiness Book of Records ... He stopped swiveling when it dawned on him that the defendants were all college girls, none of them likely to be over twenty-one years of age. “Mister Ballstrom,” he barked, “can you assure me that there are no minors in this group?” “I can, Your Honor; the youngest is eighteen.” “And who is their legal counsel?” “Your Honor, we are waiving our right to counsel.” “And you are?” “My name is Tippi Anne Bjornsen, Your Honor. We are all members of the Zeta Alpha Pi sorority, and my sisters have asked me to represent us in this matter.” “Stealing diapers, you mean. What on earth possessed you to do something this stupid?” “It was a sorority stunt, Your Honor, but it got out of hand-- and we do have someone to speak for us.” “And who would that be?” “Professor Grady, Your Honor.” “C'est moi,” Ian announced as he climbed smoothly to his feet. Without waiting for an invitation, he walked through the gate and crossed the courtroom to stand at Tippi's side. “Professor Ian Grady, Your Honor … and no, I'm not on the Law School faculty. My beat is East Asian Languages, and to make this affair a bit odder still, I am a customer of Mister Belmondo's diaper service-- in fact, the last one to have his diapers stolen, Miss Bjornsen here having done the honors.” “You're wearing a diaper,” the Judge declared, not quite believing what he was hearing. “Fully incontinent, Your Honor, courtesy of an AK-47 round, a piece of which is still lodged in my spine. And I apologize in advance if I … uh …” “I quite understand,” the Judge interjected. “Viet Nam?” “Special Forces, Fifth Airborne. Nha Trang. Ended up a Major.” “Judge Advocate,” Reynolds replied; “Marines … Da Nang. I was fortunate enough to get out in one piece. Welcome to my courtroom, Major; it's an honor.” “Now,” he continued, “what have the two of you masterminds worked out?” The Judge nodded at the District Attorney. “For the most part, Your Honor, it's pretty standard. Each of the forty one defendants will do six hours a week of community service at local hospitals, and will do so until they graduate. Professor Grady will see to their placement. Each will be fined in the amount of twenty-five hundred dollars, and they will remain on probation until graduation. The most unusual feature here, and one that we all agree is in the best interest of these young women, is that their collective grade point average must reach or exceed three point one throughout, or they will be in violation of their parole and making a return trip to court.” “I can live with that. Miss Bjornsen, do I need to poll each of you, or can you agree to these terms on behalf of your sorority house?” “We all agree, Your Honor … to these, and the additional term that has yet to be mentioned.” “Mr. Ballstrom?” “There is one additional element, Your Honor, and it is … unprecedented. However, before introducing it, I would like to request a recess so that Professor Grady can discuss the matter in private with Mister Belmondo. Rather than clear the courtroom, Your Honor, in the interests of time I would suggest that you allow them the use of your chambers.” Judge Reynolds stared hard at Q-Ball before coming to an abrupt decision. “Mister Ballstrom … Professor … Miss Bjornsen … in my quarters, now!” The Judge stormed out of the room, leaving a flabbergasted bailiff belatedly to announce that court was now in recess. Priscilla dashed through the gate, and followed in Ian's wake. She had smelling salts in her purse, and was prepared to intercede if this meeting went completely off the rails. . . . . “Knock, knock,” Vickie announced as she waltzed into Rita's office and dropped into her accustomed chair. “I only have one of Ian's diapers left in my bag. You got any?” “No, but not to panic. I washed and dried all the diapers that Sarah bought you when I got home last night, and I brought a dozen in with me. So, if we can get by with changing you three times a shift, we're good until early next week. Are you still continent?” “Hard to say. I'm peeing like a race horse, and my bowel control is shot. The breast milk is running right through me the same way it does Ian. I shit myself before bed, but Mommy changed me, and she was sweet about it. Same thing this morning. My diaper was absolutely soaked, and I messed at least once during the night. At the rate I'm going, I figure that in the near future I'll be going through about a dozen diapers a day.” “And you just walked in here without your winter coat while wearing your hospital diaper. Vickie, it is pretty obvious; are you becoming more comfortable with your diapers? With incontinence?” “Yes, definitely, and as odd as it might sound, I'm enjoying this.” Vickie frowned, sensing that she had misspoken. “That's not quite right. It's more like I'm benefiting from this … like it's therapy.” Rita leaned forward in her chair. She had occasionally wondered about the wellspring of Vickie's madcap lifestyle, but she had never questioned her. The wall of silence that surrounded her parents had always hinted at underlying emotional trauma. “When she was cleaning me up this morning, Sarah apologized for not paying attention to the warning signs … how I never talk about my family. She hugged me, and told me that I now had a mommy who loved her … cherished her … and that I would always be her little baby girl. And I started crying … bawling, really … and I couldn't stop. I was screaming that my parents had never loved me, and she was hugging me, telling me how much she loved me, and it felt so good to be loved … to be her baby girl. I need this, Rita; I really do!” “I'm glad, Vic … really glad, because if things go according to plan, on Saturday night you will be sleeping in your bed for the last time. It's going into storage. It's a tight fit, but yesterday I had another crib delivered and set up in the nursery-- your crib. You and Ian will both be our babies, and receive the love and the discipline that we think you deserve. You can be grown-ups with one another, but babies for us. Giving you a place in both worlds will allow you to heal, even as you express your love for one another.” “But … but … Auntie Rita, does this mean that you and Mommy aren't going to sleep with Ian?” “Oh, no, baby girl, far from it. Look, maybe it's the conversation we had last night, or maybe it's the one I'm having with Ian this afternoon, but I've been giving this a lot of thought. The way it looks is that you love Ian, and want children to be the outcome of that love. You want this so badly that I can easily see you throwing over your career to become a stay at home mom, and that's fine. But Sarah and I have careers that we're not giving up, only to have discovered at the eleventh hour that we also want to have children. We have both chosen Ian to be the father, and if that sounds calculating … well, it is. Oh, we do love him, but not in the way you see in the movies or read about in romance novels. He's a wonderful man, Vic, warm and giving, but also wounded and vulnerable and very complex. Passion is wonderful, but he also needs comforting-- a wife's love, and a mother's. So it's good that I'm a bit more comfortable with the baby than the man, and Sarah much prefers the baby to the man. I don't know where her control issues are coming from, but ultimately it doesn't matter because we need her. The bottom line, Vic? I don't want to run the household, and … sorry, but it's just not your thing. We can't do this without Sarah, so all of us are going to have to compromise. It looks like you will get to have the man to yourself most of the time; I'll settle for a piece of your action, and Sarah, I suspect, won't even be a disturbance in the Force!” “It all seems so cold … a household devoid of warmth ...” “Like an arranged marriage, you mean?” Rita softly laughed. “Well, it is an arranged marriage-- Sarah is arranging it! But they endure, Vic, and they tend to become more and more loving with the passage of time. And as for warmth?” Rita clapped her hands with delight, her eyes alive with good humor. “With two naughty babies in perpetual need of yet another spanking, you'll find that there's plenty of warmth in our household!” . . . . “Right,” Judge Reynolds snorted, “which one of you wants to tell me what's going on.” “Professor Grady will take it from here,” the DA quickly responded. He wanted to put as much distance between himself and this fiasco as possible. The judge simply looked at Ian. “Have you ever heard of Tony Accardo,” Ian asked. Reynolds shook his head. Uh, oh, Ballstrom thought. He was well acquainted with the Big Tuna, if only by reputation. “Tony heads up the Chicago Outfit-- a euphemism for the Mafia. He worked his way up through the ranks the old fashioned, Chicago way. His nickname, Joe Batters, doesn't leave much to the imagination. He mentored Belmondo, who seems to get a hard on around wood chippers. In short, Tippi here and her friends out there are in a lot of trouble. With your cooperation, I can make it go away.” Welcome to the real world, Tom ... Ballstrom had his head down. He was studying a speck of something on the carpet, wishing that he could make himself equally small. “Go on,” the Judge instructed. “We're going to make the punishment fit the crime, at least as Spats will see it. The girls are going to become his customers … diapers 24/7 for the whole of their probation. He'll get off on humiliating them, and turn a tidy profit in the process.” “And you think this lunacy will be enough to buy him off??” Ian nodded. “I've got some serious leverage that I can bring to bear, both carrots and sticks. But none of it is for public consumption. Give me ten minutes alone with him, and I'll seal the deal.” “Gareth, are you good with this?” Reynolds was done dancing around. “Yeah,” Ballstrom conceded. “Belmondo can't risk the consequences of a public humiliation, and I won't be reelected if he's going around bumping off sorority girls.” “And you think this man can make the pitch work?” The Judge was pointing at Ian. “I do.” “And how about you, Priscilla?” The Canons and the Reynolds lived on the same block, a mere four properties separating the two households. Reynolds considered himself lucky to have a grizzled veteran like Herb Canon living just down the street. “You can take anything Ian tells you to the bank.” Short and sweet. “And you are here … because?” “Part bodyguard, part nurse,” she replied. “Ian is a hot commodity that the university doesn't want to lose, so I've been assigned to keep the corporate headhunters at bay. But he also brought Viet Nam home with him in the form of flashbacks that can put him on the ground. So, I'm also here to get him back on his feet.” “All right. Professor, I don't know who you are, and from the looks of Gareth's body language, I'm content to leave it that way. You've got your ten minutes-- and help yourself to coffee. My clerk brews a mean pot!” . . . . “Be right back,” Julia said. Patting Herb's knee to reassure him, Julia headed toward the rear of the courtroom. Prudence dictated that she confront Belmondo on neutral ground. Herb followed her with his eyes, and so did Walt Mischof. “Not to worry, Herb,” the Chief muttered. “Spats is too smart to make his play in a crowded courtroom.” “How's business, Jerome? Ambulance chasing still paying the bills?” Julia had taken a seat directly in front of Jerome Goldstein, the white-haired attorney who had been running interference for Spats Belmondo for almost thirty years. “Making ends meet,” Goldstein laconically replied. He wasn't in the mood to play games with Julia Canon. Julia opened her purse, and pulled out a copy of her billing. She turned to face Spats, and thrust it in his face. “Tuesday's expenses came to nine hundred, fifty seven dollars and twenty-six cents. I haven't had a chance to work up yesterday's, but they'll be in the same neighborhood. A thousand up front would be nice.” “Pay da lady, Pauly,” Spats said to his Consigliere, who leaned forward to drop an envelope on the chair next to Julia's. She opened it, and quickly thumbed the ten C notes inside. “Do you want a receipt?” “What I want is an explanation for hows I ended up on da local news. Yous was supposed ta do this real quiet like.” “Take it up with Jerome. He apparently missed the lecture on setting up dummy corporations to hide the assets of clients who value their privacy.” “Dat right, Jerry?” Spats was glaring at his mouthpiece. “Your businesses are all legitimate, Vincent; you don't need fronts.” Jerome's tone was world weary. “Dats right, Twinkster; everytings legit. Only now, every two bit hood in da Cities knows that I deal in diapers, and dat I been ripped off by a bunch a college floozies. Dis ain't good … not good at all.” “Not to worry, Spats. Professor Grady-- one of your customers, by the way-- is selling it to the judge as we speak.” “Selling what?” “A plan that will make you a tidy profit if you play along. And you get to stick a fire hose up their asses in the process.” Julia nodded in the general direction of the young defendants. “I like da sound a dat.” Spats was licking his lips; after all, he was in business to make a profit. There was no such thing as too much cash on hand. “Then follow the Professor's lead.” Dropping the envelope into her purse, Julia walked across the courtroom to rejoin her husband. . . . . “Diapers aren't all that bad, Tippi-- especially when you've got the right person changing you.” Ian playfully winked at her. “Maybe we can change each other,” Tippi fired back, staring him down. After the judge had sneaked out of his chambers to pay a lengthy visit to the Men's Room with the District Attorney hot on his heels, Ian had escorted Tippi back to her friends while nudging Priscilla in the direction of her parents. There could be no witnesses to his conversation with Spats Belmondo. Sauntering to the rear of the courtroom, Ian sat down in the same seat that Julia had occupied a few minutes earlier. He took Goldstein's measure in one casual glance, but did a double take when he shifted his attention to the Consigliere. I swear to God! It's Toothpick Charlie, risen from the dead! Ah, well … time to get down to business … “Mister Belmondo, I'm Professor Ian Grady, one of Lullaby's adult customers. I'm happy with the product, and with the way your niece sees to my needs, but there are alternatives in the marketplace that offer superior protection. I'm wearing one right now.” Ian stood up, and turned around to give the trio a good look at his well padded rear. “Your business is about to expand, so if you'll give me your number, I'll set you up with a purchasing agent at the hospital who can point you in the right direction.” “Mister Belmondo's number is unlisted,” Goldstein interrupted, “but I'm in the phone book.” “Don't have a copy. Why don't you and Toothpick Charlie here go out and find me one? Spats and I have pressing matters to discuss, and the judge has been kind enough to offer us his chambers. He's even willing to share his coffee!” Ian looked down at the gangster with a pleasant smile on his lips, but his eyes were cold. Spats recognized the look. He was being measured for his coffin. “So you're da war hero dat I keep hearin' about.” Spats decided to bluff it out. “How many guys you clipped?” “The official count is eleven hundred, plus. The real number is north of twenty three hundred.” Ian's look did not change. “The judge is giving us the use of his chambers for ten minutes. Shall we?” Ian vaguely gestured at the door behind the bench. “Yeah. Let's get to it.” Spats climbed to his feet, double checked the shine on his shoes, and then followed Ian out of the courtroom. . . . . Priscilla was watching the girls milling around in the well of the court. Most of them looked totally lost. “Do you think any of them have made their phone call,” she asked Bernice. “I thought that was just on TV,” the house mom replied. “You mean it's for real?” Priscilla nodded. “An attorney … a loved one … the really crazy ones will call out for pizza.” “No.” Bernice sadly shook her head. “I don't think anyone's called; they're way too ashamed.” “Some of their parents must have seen the news last night. They'll be frantic. Did any of them call the house before you left?” “I don't know. The last thing I did after getting Ian settled was go around the public areas and unplug all the phones. I don't want to speak with the press, and I definitely don't want them upsetting the few girls left in the house.” “We should talk to them. They may not even know that they have the right to contact their families. Come on; let's go find out.” Priscilla led Bernice inside the railing, and together they approached Tippi, who was clearly the leader of the group and not just its spokesperson. “How are you holding up,” Bernice asked. “Oh, it's been great fun so far!” Tippi's reply was as vicious as it was sarcastic, and she was aiming daggers at Priscilla. “Comfortable beds … first class food … and we've made some new friends. Ruby is a real hoot!” “You are all entitled to make phone calls.” Priscilla decided to ignore the sarcasm. “Did anyone call your parents? Your arrests were all over the ten PM news; they must be worried sick.” “Anyone,” Bernice asked in a softer tone of voice. The girls were looking at one another, and shaking their heads. “We'll wait until we have something tangible to report.” Priscilla dearly wanted to slap Tippi Bjornsen hard enough to knock her down, then beat some sense into the self-absorbed brat. Instead, she spun away, looked up at the ceiling, took a deep breath, and tried to calm down. God, give me strength!!! “I'm disappointed in all of you,” Bernice continued, her voice still soft. “There's a man in there giving you life lessons in the meaning of compassion. He's one of your victims, and yet he's in there trying to shield you from the consequences of your actions. And none of you seem to get it … none of you.” “We're all afraid,” Janis sobbed. “I understand that Janis. And how do you think your parents feel right now? You know what's going on … they don't. I doubt if they got any sleep last night, and now their imaginations must be running riot. They love you, and they need to hear you say that you're safe. The rest will sort itself out in time.” . . . . “Vinnie, I need to make a quick call. Why don't you pour us a couple of cups of coffee?” Without waiting for a response, Ian pulled Marilyn Marsden's card out of his wallet, and dialed her home number. It seemed highly unlikely that either of the Marsdens would have gone to work this morning. “Hello?” Marilyn picked up on the first ring. “Ian Grady here, Marilyn … and by here, I mean in the chambers of the judge who got stuck handling this case. Has Janis called you?” “No! Oh, God, Ian, what's going on? We've been up all night, waiting for the phone to ring … praying ...” “Marilyn, your daughter is safe … confused, scared, probably afraid that you're going to disown her, but safe. It was your typical fraternity row stunt, only it got out of hand. Right now, I'm putting the finishing pieces on an agreement that the District Attorney and Judge Reynolds have already signed off on, so with luck, Janis will be out of here in another half hour or so. Now, can you do me a favor?” “Yes! Of course, Ian; thank you!” Ian could hear Marilyn telling her husband that Janis was okay. “I'm guessing,” Ian explained when Marilyn got back on the line, “that there are a lot of worried parents who've had rough nights. Do you know how to get a hold of them?” “Yes. Bernice gives every parent a sheet with the home addresses and phone numbers of all the girls. It's for emergencies.” “Understood. I'd like you to call everyone on the list, and let them know that their daughters are safe. They should also take a peek at their check books. I don't know who's who here, but there are forty one girls who are going to be fined twenty-five hundred dollars each as part of their punishment. I'll lay out the rest of it once the judge enters his decree.” “Are you taking the girls back to the house?” “I'd like to take them to the hospital, but first I have to see about transport. Give me time to sort it out, and I'll get back to you.” “Ian, I don't know how or why you're mixed up in this, but thank you. From the bottom of my heart … thank you.” “Touching,” Spats grunted when Ian hung up; “very, very touching.” Spats handed Ian a cup, and took a sip of his own. The gangster curled his lips in satisfaction. “Not too shabby,” he nodded; “in fact, not bad at all.” “First things, first.” Ian took a sip, and nodded his approval. “I've checked out your dad, and I know that Tomasso emigrated from Naples, but that's where the trail goes cold. What can you tell me about your grandparents?” “Wat da hell? Whys you int ... er ... rested in my family?” “Vinnie, cut it out. As bootleggers go, your dad was a good soldier, able to work with both Capone and the Purple Gang. However, Tomasso did not want his sons to follow him into the rackets, so he scrimped and saved to provide you with a high quality, private school education. And you did so well that you ended up a Brown Phi Beta Kappa, class of forty eight … next stop, a Princeton MBA. Which reminds me: my source is also a Princeton man, and he wants to know whether you still remember the fight song.” Here comes that Tiger, wow! He's running wild, They'll never stop him now! "There are several fight songs,” Spats grinned as he settled back in one of the judge's plush chairs, “but Here Comes That Tiger is my favorite. And I'm impressed Grady … really impressed. I've put a lot of time and effort into the Spats Belmondo persona, and you're the first person to crack it in all the years I've been in the Cities. What gives?” “I'm interested in your grandfathers … whether the family's roots are in Naples, or Sicily.” “Sicily. We hail from Catania … still got family there.” “Antonio?” “WHAT?” Spats was so surprised that he almost shot out of his chair. “You know my cousin?” “I've employed his services,” Ian acknowledged. “Good man to know when you need to get in and out of Libya without the authorities being any the wiser.” “Holy shit, if you'll pardon my French. How is the old reprobate?” “Prospering. A wife who cooks up a storm, and a discreet mistress. Life is good.” “And do I want to know how a disabled vet teaching out here in flyover country happens to be chummy with a Mafia don in Sicily?” Ian curled his lips thinking about it. “I do favors for friends with a wide range of international interests. That good enough?” “It'll do,” Spats shrugged. The Professor had CIA written all over him. DA's and judges didn't bow and scrape before every Tom, Dick and Harry. “Okay, here's the deal. First, the girls out there are all off limits. No repercussions of any kind. If that causes you any problems with the Big Tuna, let me know, and I'll make them go away. In return for this favor, as I said, I'm going to help you grow your diaper business. The forty one girls out there are going to become customers, and they don't get out of diaper prison until they graduate. You'll make a few bucks, and have a good laugh over your cigars and sambuca.” “Second, you're going to get a letter next week from the IRS. You've been selected for a seven year audit of your personal and business filings-- a comprehensive audit, the kind where they want proof that you actually tossed those nickels and dimes into the Salvation Army kettle. If you can't support every claim on every line of every form, they're going to crucify you.” “Let me guess. I agree to leave the girls alone, and this all turns out to be a great, big mistake.” “Yep. They'll be a handwritten telephone number at the bottom, left corner of the cover letter. Pick up the phone, and you'll be treated to abject apologies for a filing error. We got a deal?” “We got a deal,” Spats agreed. “Good.” Ian settled back in his chair. “Now let's get down to business.” “Huh? I thought we were talking business!” “Just preliminaries. My sources tell me that you would like to visit the old country, but are afraid that if you leave, you'll be denied reentry. Well, I want you to do me a little favor, and in return it's bon voyage, happy trails, however you want to put it.” “How little?” “The families still taking an interest in the food services industry?” “Are you kidding,” Spats laughed. “I'm the union rep for the SEIU in this burg!” “Well, I'm in the market for a rather odd piece of information, and I want the search to be nationwide. What I'm after is an unusual delivery, probably scheduled monthly or twice a month, to someplace remote and easy to defend. Security will probably be heavy, but it may be well concealed. The tell that there's something wrong will be in the cereals.” Utterly mystified, Spats simply shook his head. “You've lost me completely.” “The order will include kids' cereals … quite a large quantity of them.” “Shit.” Spats saw it instantly. “Kids are off limits, Professor. I want you to know that … inside the families, kids are off limits.” “It's the same with us. We've all got families, and we're all exposed. So, it's a hard, red line. You cross it, and the entire intelligence community sanctions you … nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. It's open season, and an agent whose family has been targeted gets first crack.” Spats nodded his head. It was beginning to sound like the Families had a lot in common with the CIA. “Your friends should also be on the lookout for a second tell-- a sudden increase in supplies on regular order. Now that I've surfaced, I'm expecting security at this facility to be reinforced.” Ian leaned forward in his chair, his cup of coffee forgotten. “Nine years ago, while I was laid up in a hospital figuring out how to cope with wearing diapers for the rest of my life? Back in Viet Nam, someone murdered my wife and massacred an entire village in order to run off with my daughter, all in the hope that she's inherited my gift for languages. I want her back, Vincent, and then I'm going to sanction everyone of the bastards involved. If you want a piece of the action, I'll deal you in, and I'll make it worth your while.” “I'm in.” Spats got up and walked over to the desk. He grabbed a pen and pad, and hastily wrote a number. “My personal number,” he said as he handed Ian the scrap of paper. “Anything you need? You got it.” Ian took a business card out of his wallet, and handed it over. “A pizza joint out in Bloomington, and it's a legit business. If you come up with the information I'm looking for, call this number and order a large pie. If the info is rock solid, make it a thick crust; if it's sketchy, a thin. When you're asked what type of cheese you want, say Gorgonzola. The response will be 'sorry, we're all out, but if you leave me a phone number, I'll make one for you free of charge'. The call back will set up a rendezvous; I'm thinking Julia Canon's office, which is right across the street from the hospital. I take it you've been there?” “Works for me,” Spats agreed. “One last thing. Is it true that you've got a cabin somewhere near Ely?” “Yeah … some of the boys like to go hunting.” “Got a wood chipper up there?” “In good working order.” The gangster's smile was cruel. “I might need to use it one of these days.” Ian wasn't smiling at all.

Chapter 9 : A Twin Festival? Welcome back, my JJ Little Baby Besties. Did you have a nice nap? Or did you sleep well through the night? Or are you just about to get all cozy for another bedtime story? If you need a fresh diapey, don’t worry. I, Miss Jillian, your temporary mommy for the duration of this detailed account of the progression of my diapered life, will patiently wait for you while you get out of that wet and/or messy diapey. In a fresh diapey now? Good baby. Mommy Jill will continue with her story now. Where we last left off, I officially began my first ever JillianPlays stream on Twitch. Despite how fun the turnout was, it was a whole lot of fun. Now I want you to hang on to your diapeys, because I’m going to hit the fast forward button. We are now 28 days into the future. I was in my twin sister Jen’s room, where we were both putting on our Wendy Darling costumes. A blue short sleeved night gown with a blue bow that we each wore in our hair. We each needed to get our hair cut short to match the same length as her’s. With my sister being super crazy about the details, we even had our hair dyed to match the same golden-brown color. From where the bow was tied, seven strands of hair hung behind it, each strand rolled into a perfect curl. The costumes were perfect, and from all the Wendy cosplays that I saw online, I would have to say that ours was the best. It was Thursday evening when we had our third and final costume rehearsal. Both Jen and I would get into our Wendy costumes and style each other’s hair, and then watch the animated Peter Pan one more time. And with it being the 12th time that we have seen the movie together, I could almost recite every line of the movie by heart. We would watch the movie, and we would then go off to bed. Everything was ready to go for the next day. Our luggage bags sat in the living room, all fully packed. The plane tickets sat on the kitchen table, along with a detailed itinerary that my sister printed out. Jen also drew out $1,000, so we each had $500 for spending money. All that remained was watching the Disney classic one more time before going off to bed. As Jen was about to play the Peter Pan Blu-Ray (we couldn’t stream it on Disney Plus because they removed the movie for stupid woke reasons), she gave me a quizzical look. “Um, Jill?” she asked me with a worried look that conveyed a deep level of concern. “Can you use the bathroom before we start?” Now there was a reason why Jen’s request was so urgent. The last time that we watched Peter Pan (which was just four days ago), I forgot to use the bathroom. In the middle of the movie, I felt my pants getting all warm and moist. Before I knew it, the couch cushion that I was sitting on was soaked in a puddle of pee, which was quickly soaking into the fabric of the cushion. With that, my twin sister paused the movie and had me go take a shower and clean up. While I did this, she began wiping down the cushion. She then sprayed the cushion with stain remover and sat it out to dry. Since that incident that evening, my sister made it clear. I was going to be wearing a diaper for the rest of the movie. And it was a good thing that I did. Towards the end of the movie, I had a much smaller accident, which was barely enough for me to even detect that there was any dampness at all in my diaper. So at my sister’s request to use the bathroom before we started the movie, I gave her an embarrassed nod as I hurried to the bathroom. I had to pee, but just not really bad. I sat down on the toilet and after about 15 seconds of peeing, my bladder was empty again. After I washed my hands and left the bathroom as I let them air dry, I returned to the living room and sat down in the dark living room, where only the faint glow coming from the UHD TV could be seen. Jen started the movie and began watching Peter Pan for the 12th time. Now wait a second! I can tell what you are thinking. Mommy Jillian, what happened during those 28 days that you skipped? If it concerns you, my JJ Diapered fam, not to worry. Mommy Jill has prepared the perfect summary of all the key things that have transpired for the last 28 days. So pop in that pacie and enjoy this wonderful recap. For day two of the stream, it was pretty much more of the same. I didn’t get any new followers or subscribers but I had the same audience. GaretheBear, JtheCalcugamer, JennyPenny2001, and Glytter all watched me finish Super Mario Bros. 2 (Lost Levels) and complete three more dungeons in The Legend of Zelda. From my close call with the bathroom yesterday, I decided to wear diapers during my streams. During my first break, I changed into a new diaper before returning to my bedroom. With this new schedule, I was now fully diapered for the rest of the day after starting my streams. But this also meant that I was going through a lot more diapers. With the diapers originally intended for nighttime use, I was now using them out of convenience for my streams, before changing into my nightly one for bedtime. Having done the math, I was now going through 19 diapers per week. Getting back to the stream, Glytter didn’t quite have my emotes done, but promised that they would be finished by Monday. Sure enough, Monday came and the emotes were finished as promised. While my emote library could hold a maximum of 35 emotes and 5 animated slots, Glytter managed to complete five emotes to start me off. These emotes included JillianHopeful, JillianYAY, JillianHug, JillianCry, and JillianVictory. Each emote portrayed a cartoon image of me portraying the expression based on the emote’s name. For next week’s batch of new emotes, Glytter promised me my first animated emote. After streams, I spent some time trying to figure out what subs to categorize each emote in for my emote library. With me wearing diapers a lot more often, it has become increasingly more difficult to control the function of my bladder. On Sundays and all during the week before my streams, I could only hold in my bladder for about an hour before I had an accident, so trips to the bathroom were a lot more frequent. After an embarrassing trip to 7-Eleven for Slurpee Day, both Jen and I agreed. From that point on, I would need to wear diapers in public, making long dresses or baggy jeans a must to hide my diaper. The Infamous 7-11 accident happened on a day that Jen decided to work from home. She took a break for us to get our Slurpees and spend an hour at King of Prussia mall. Jen and I had to use the bathroom before we started to look around for clothes at different stores. Before we could even enter the bathroom, I couldn’t hold it anymore. From all that I drank from the Slurpee, I felt my pants getting warm as the pee ran down my legs and formed a puddle right outside the bathrooms. To avoid any further embarrassment from all who saw this act, Jen quickly took me into a family bathroom (More privacy! Thank goodness!) and had me wait there while she bought me a new panty, a new pair of pants, and a new graphic tee. About 25 minutes later, she came back with my new clothes and a plastic bag where she stuffed in all the clothes that I pissed on. But that didn’t help my self-esteem. For the rest of the trip home, I was crying my eyes out while my sister glanced at me with compassion. From her facial expression, I knew that she wanted to hug me, but she couldn’t because she was driving me home. During the next four weekends, Gary took me out on dates every Saturday. I kept my promise with him to stay diapered while we were dating. During the first weekend, Gary bought me three more bags of Certainty Unisex Fitted Briefs. That’s 96 more diapers now. During the four weeks of my July dates with Gary, I only managed to make it to the toilet two times. Both of those times were at his house, but I have found over the past month that my ability to control my bladder was getting much worse. While we’re on the topic of bladder control, I noticed something even worse going on. During a lot of my streams, I get so focused on my game that I end up peeing my diaper without even knowing. I couldn’t tell you any instance when the accident actually happened. All I know is that I always have to check my diaper during the breaks and I found that it is soaked every time. At this point, I considered trying to re-potty train myself, but I dismissed the thought for now, as Twins Days was growing ever closer with each day. One thing that I can be grateful for is that my bowels were still functioning properly. During my new shift to wearing diapers more often, all of my poops are still in the toilet. So what about searching for a job? At that point in my Twitch career, Twitch just wasn’t paying the bills. All during the days, my first job was to find a job. Every week, I submitted new applications for anchor positions around Pittsburgh, Philadelphia, Boston, Baltimore, and the large metro area surrounding New York City. And during that whole month, I wasn’t scheduled for a single interview. So while I did my first job, my fun Twitch job continued after work hours. And how was my “second” job going? Over the whole month, I managed to play most of the classic Nintendo games that would be recommended to someone who has never played video games before. After completing around 20 games, I started playing some Switch games that my sister had in her catalogue. I fell in love with Animal Crossing: New Horizons and dedicated an hour of my stream to the game every day. I can see why my sister loves the character Isabelle so much. She’s such an adorable dog. While I was having fun, my Twitch career was still a no-go. 11 new followers during my second week. 12 new followers during my third week. Eight new followers during my fourth week. And 0 new followers during this week. Altogether, I only had 15 subscribers during my first month, and they were all Tier 1, since this was the only option, and I didn’t have Tier 2 and Tier 3 emotes available yet. And I made a whopping $37.43 for July. Strike that. During week four, someone donated 10,000 bits to my channel. Since Twitch keeps 50% of all earned bits, that’s another 50 bucks. I better get that day job. During those weeks, I started to get to know Glytter more, and she gave me 15 more emotes and 3 animated emotes. This gave me a total of 20 out of 35 emotes and 3 out of 5 animated emotes. The 15 additional slots included JillianIceCream, JillianRage, Jillian100 (me holding a yellow 100), JillianLOL, JillianHangry, JillianSmile, JillianMario (an animated me wearing a Mario hat), JillianGasp, JillianNO (me closing my eyes in defeat), JillianFriendship (me looking forward with open arms), JillianAnchor (me dressed up like a news anchor), JillianSnack (me holding a dorito), JillianSip (me holding my mouth to a can of Mountain Dew), JillianTaco (me holding a taco), and JillianSecret (Me holding a golden key). The three animated emotes included JillianPOP (a looping animation of me opening my mouth showing a wide and exaggerated circle), JillianDance (a looping animation of me shaking my waist back and forth with my eyes closed), and JillianCheer (a looping animation of me alternating my two hands up and down dressed up as a cheerleader). Nobody had any access to these new emotes, as I was still trying to determine what Sub Tiers to assign each of the emotes to. This would be figured out after Jen and I come back from the Twins Days Festival. And after yesterday’s stream, Glytter finally gave me her cellphone number and I exchanged mine with her as well. Among one of the things that that Glytter has revealed to me, her real name is Alyssa Glynnda Evans. From her middle name, I can see where “Glytter” came from. Since we have exchanged numbers, I have not received a call from Glytter yet. For my job search today (August 3rd), I came across an open anchor position right in downtown Philadelphia. When I googled the location, I just couldn’t believe it. The news station was only eight city blocks north of Metro City Apartments (AKA home of the Jenners Twins). I could almost walk to this job as this was less than a mile away. It was CBS Philadelphia, and they were looking for an evening news anchor. I made no hesitation in applying for this job. I emailed my polished résumé with my best credentials: Cover letter, references, letters of recommendation, and work samples from my internship in Cleveland. I then crossed my fingers, hoping that I could get this job. And with that, there’s really not much more to say about what happened over the last month, besides Jen and I getting ready for the Twins Days Festival. All the matching outfits that we bought and the Wendy costume that my sister has been working so hard on. And not to mention all the numerous evenings that we spent watching Peter Pan (which would be late at night before bed on stream nights). This morning, I packed everything that I would need for Twins Days. Since I probably needed more diapers than just the ones that I wore at night, I would be needing a separate luggage bag just to hold all of my diapers. Fortunately, Jen had an extra luggage bag for me to use. Having done the math, I would be needing at least 3-4 diapers per day for this trip. That would be Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, when we were coming back to Philadelphia. To be safe, I packed 16 diapers just in case I had any additional accidents. When I was about to pack some of my panties in my clothes luggage, Jen gave me a funny look. “Jill,” she said, picking up one of my Victoria Secret panties. “Are you really going to be wearing underwear there? With you mostly wearing diapers there, I really don’t think this is a good idea. What if you have another accident?” I grabbed the panty from my sister and put it back in the bag. I then blushed. “It’s just an afterthought. If I have just one accident, I promise that I’ll be wearing diapers the rest of the time there!” Jen sighed. “Okay. I really don’t want you to humiliate yourself there, but I can’t stop you. Just know that you are going to wear a diaper on the airplane!” I laughed at my sister’s recommendation. “Duh…” I could still freshly remember the embarrassing accident that I had while flying to Cleveland more than a month ago. For my clothes bags, I packed five outfits. I would be wearing the sixth one tomorrow morning, when my sister and I went to the airport. All of them were different colored crop tops with different colored knee-length skirts. My sister and I decided on this, since I needed a skirt long enough to hide my diaper. For pajamas, my sister bought a Joyspun Women’s Short Sleeve T-Shirt and Joggers Pajama set from Walmart that matched mine. We each had two sets of the same pajamas to save on luggage. To further save on luggage, I had my sister pack all my bras with her bras. She will also be packing both of the costumes but held off since she wanted to do one more costume rehearsal with the movie. She also packed a couple of swimsuits in case that we had time to use the pool. I likely wouldn’t use the pool, since I didn’t want to risk accidentally peeing in it. So altogether, between our clothes and toiletries, Jen had two suitcases with a large backpack purse for carryon and I had two suitcases with a large backpack purse for carryon (that Gary just bought me on our last July date. Thanks Gary!). Jen had all my bras, pajamas, swimsuit, and Twins Days Festival costume for Saturday. My backpack purse had all the normal cosmetics, plus four diapers (a day’s worth). Jen advised me to pack baby powder less than 12 ounces for carryon, or the powder could be confiscated by TSA. To meet TSA guidelines, I packed a 5-ounce container of Caldesene Baby Corn Starch powder with a small pack of wipes. Substances like creams were also not allowed by the TSA, so I couldn’t have anything like Aquaphor or Desitin unless it was in a checked luggage bag. The larger pack of wipes, along with my Aquaphor and larger container of baby powder was in my checked luggage with all of my other diapers. So, my JJ Little Besties, was that a good enough recap for you? You’re welcome. With all of the recap and preparations that I mentioned, we can now finally return to the present, where Jen and I were watching Peter Pan for the 12th time. Jen and I watched the entire movie. I had to pee again but was fortunately able to hold it this time. After the movie was over, I hurried to the bathroom to pee. I then went to my room to get ready for bed. I diapered myself again (now very much used to it at this point) and put a T-shirt on over my bra and pajama bottoms. Thanks to Gary keeping me plenty stocked, I had 95 diapers left (74 if you count all the diapers that I packed, including the one I will be wearing to the airport tomorrow morning). My diaper rustled against the cotton fabric in my pajama bottoms. I heard the loud crinkling as I quietly paced outside my room, my diaper being louder than my gentle steps. I entered my sister’s bathroom where I saw my sister in just her bra and pajama bottoms. She immediately turned her face as the loud crinkle of my diaper announced my arrival. Jen smiled and patted my pajama bottoms to hear the soft pat from my diaper. I gave her a grimace. She then gave me a hug. “Sorry Jill. Just messing with you. It’s a love pat! We’re twins. We’re best friends. It’s the best friendship anyone could have. And we get to celebrate it tomorrow. Aren’t you excited?” I nodded. “I am. I just wanted to say goodnight.” Jen held up an electric toothbrush that had a glob of toothpaste on it. “Good night, Jilly Bean!” I tapped my finger on my sister’s nose and smiled. “Good night, Jenny Penny!” Jen brushed her teeth, and I left her bedroom. I then entered my bedroom and shut off the lights. I then got underneath the covers of my queen size bed. I closed my eyes and smiled, looking forward to the start of Twins Days Festival tomorrow… I awoke to a very loud alarm at 4:50 in the morning. From what Jen told me yesterday, Gary would be riding with Joey and taking us to the airport at 5:50 AM sharp, since our flight departs at 8:20 AM at Philadelphia International Airport (PHL), and it is recommended that we get to the airport two hours before our flight departs. Full of excitement with what this day has to offer, I quickly got up and made my bed. I then entered the bathroom and took a quick shower. I wrapped a towel around my waist and around my breasts and went back into my bedroom. Instead of putting on my panties, I grabbed the diaper that I had sitting on the floor the night before and powdered it before diapering myself. It felt strange putting on a diaper in the morning instead of my panties that I was so used to wearing after getting ready in the morning. I put on my bra and then the clothes that both Jen and I agreed upon for this day: a white crop top, a black knee-length skirt, a pair of Champion white low-cut socks, and a pair of Grey New Balance 993 Sneakers. I left my room and waited for my sister to finish showering and dressing up. About a minute later, I saw Jen walking out of her bedroom wearing the same exact outfit as me. “Good morning, Jill.” My sister Jen said with a smile. She then gave me a teasing stare. “Oh Jill! You’re dressed in the same outfit as me?” I understood the joke immediately and humored her. “But you’re wearing the same outfit as me! Even our shoes and socks match!” I felt around the butt of my skirt to feel the soft padding of my diaper and gave it a soft pat. “Wait. Are you wearing a diaper too?” I walked over and patted my sister in the behind, but all I felt was cotton. There was no padding. “Not exactly, Jill!” Jen grinned. She gave me a playful shove and laughed. “I don’t need to wear a diaper under my skirt. Everything that is visible is supposed to match.” I nodded and glanced down at my bust. “Are you wearing the same bra as me?” “Nope!” Jen said with a laugh. “Our bras are underneath our crop tops. Everything visible, you silly goose.” I then shot Jen a double take. “Wait! Could we be…twins?” Now Jen was having a riot. Her smile widened as her eyes conveyed a look of sarcasm. “Oh, I don’t know Jill! Us? Twins? It doesn’t seem very likely.” That did it. Our cheeks both reddened as we burst into laughter. “You better watch out,” I warned my sister, still laughing. “You’re not wearing a diaper.” This made Jen laugh even harder. “Jill…” Jen said, her eyes starting to water from all the laughter. “I have never peed myself from laughing too hard…” Our fit of laughter was interrupted when I heard two knocks on the apartment door. We both shouted the names of our boyfriends at exactly the same time. “Gary!” I shouted. “Joey!” Jen shouted. “They’re here!” we both shouted at the same time. We both grabbed the handle of the door at the same time and opened the door. I glanced at Gary and saw him darting his eyes back and forth. “Wait!” Gary said with a smile. “Which one is Jill?” Joey sighed. “You’re right! I can’t tell who Jen is!” We both gave playful jabs to our boyfriends. “Gary…” I said with a smile. “Come on. You know I’m Jen.” “Then I got the wrong one!” Gary said, maintaining the smirk on his face. He then began to laugh and dropped the act. “Jill, you look nice…” “What about me?” Jen asked in a tone that indicated that she was obviously joking. Joey gave both Jen and I a look of approval. “You both look very nice. Just like twins!” Jen nodded and looked at her cell phone. “5:32. We got about 15 minutes!” During the next five minutes, both my sister and I finished doing each other’s hair. We each had our hair French braided into two short pigtails. Both Gary and Joey gave us the thumbs up when our hair styles perfectly matched. With 10 minutes left, we all walked over to the table, and each grabbed a luggage bag. Both Jen and I each put our backpack purses on, and Jen grabbed the plane tickets and the itinerary before we all exited the apartment. On our way down to the parking deck, Gary tapped my backpack purse, which just so happened to be the exact same one as Jen’s. “What do you think? Do you think it will come in handy?” He leaned down and whispered into my ear. “Jill, I know how much more frequent your accidents are becoming. I figured that this would make it a lot easier to handle them. Plus, your bag matches your sister’s!” Joey caught notice of Gary glancing at my backpack purse. “Wow! A matching purse! Who could’ve planned something like that?” Joey winked his eye at Gary, who winked back. “Thanks.” Gary said to Joey, giving him a fist bump. We made our way to Joey’s car. I looked at it and gasped. “Another Mercedes?” Joey nodded. “Not just any Mercedes. A white Mercedes-Maybach GLS SUV. Got it in May as an early birthday gift from my father.” My jaw dropped. “Is your dad loaded? I know that Gary’s uncle is…” Joey and Jen exchanged glances. Joey then looked back at me. “In a way he is. But it wasn’t his own money.” “Then whose money is it?” “Inheritance.” Both Joey and Jen said at exactly the same time. Joey nodded. “My grandfather was wealthy, and he sadly passed away in April. Compared to what he inherited, this toy is just pocket change. Plus, it’s not his own money. He would never buy something that expensive with his own money. It was a very special early birthday gift given to me right after my grandfather’s passing…” “And at the same dealership.” Jen added. “We both got our cars on the same day.” The conversation continued as we packed everything into the Maybach. Joey and Gary got in the front of the SUV, while Jen and I rode in the back. As the SUV made its way down Eastbound I-76, I gasped. Jen gave me the look and glanced down at my skirt. “Is there something wrong, Jill?” She gently whispered into my ear. “Did you have an accident?” I shook my head. Gary looked back at me. “Maybe she forgot something back at the apartment. Should we turn back?” All eyes were now on me. Neither answer was correct. I came to the realization that I forgot to tell Jen about the job that I applied for yesterday. My anxious face became a smile. “Jen,” I announced. “I forgot to tell you that I applied for a job yesterday.” Jen nodded. “A job? I’m listening, Jill…” I beamed, as I continued explaining the job in detail. “It was for an evening news anchor for CBS Philadelphia.” Jen’s jaw dropped. “CBS Philadelphia?! Jill! That studio is right downtown! You wouldn’t even have to drive there!” Joey smiled, sharing the same excitement that was clearly visible in Jen’s eyes. He then glanced at me. “That’s great to hear! So, when’s the interview?” I frowned. “I just applied for the position yesterday. I wasn’t scheduled for an interview yet!” “Okay.” Joey said. “That’s skill good news. I’ll be praying that things go in your favor!” Jen placed her two hands on my arm. “That is such good news, Jill! I will definitely be praying…” Gary nodded. “Yeah. We all hope you get it!” After giving them the good news about the interview, the conversation died out to just a quiet discussion between Joey and Gary. Most of the discussion had to do with the latest video games and their plans for the weekend after dropping us off at the airport. The faint and quiet hum of the car made me fall asleep a couple times. Jen was kind enough to let me nod off instead of jolting me back awake. Finally, something forced me awake. Joey was getting off at the exit that went to Philadelphia International Airport. Exit 347A. The route continued down PA-291. We crossed the George C. Platt Memorial bridge. A couple minutes later, we were at the airport. We all got out of the Maybach. Both Joey and Gary helped Jen and I with our luggage and we walked in towards Airport Terminal A. I hugged Gary and he gave me a kiss on the cheek. I kissed Gary back and smiled. “Take plenty of pictures!” Gary said with a smile. “I hope that you find your new purse to be helpful!” I smiled, wishing that I could just remain in Gary’s embrace forever. “I will! Both Jen and I will!” Meanwhile, my sister was enjoying her last moments with Joey before saying goodbye to him. By her timing, it looked like we both finished our goodbyes at the same time. The white Mercedes-Maybach GLS SUV drove off, leaving both me and Jen outside the entrance to Terminal A at Philadelphia International Airport. We both smiled as our twin adventure was about to begin. We both walked to the American Airlines kiosk to check in our four bags of luggage. I gave the woman clerk my two bags and Jen provided her with her two bags. While Jen was paying for the four bags by credit card, I glanced at the boarding pass that Jen gave me. Our flight was AAL1557. A nonstop flight leaving Philadelphia International Airport at 8:20 AM and arriving at Cleveland Hopkins International Airport at 9:58 AM. The plane that we would be riding in for this flight is an Embraer ERJ-175 jet, and I would be sitting in Seat 16F in the Main Cabin. Jen would be sitting in Seat 16D, right next to me. Since I am wearing a diaper, both Jen and I agreed that it would make more sense to have her sit in the aisle seat so it would give her easy access to the bathroom in the back of the plane more than seven rows back. A gentle nudge on my shoulders was an indication from Jen that she was finished paying for the checked bags. We both walked towards the TSA checkpoint, backpack purses on our backs. Despite it being just 6:18 in the morning, the line was still pretty busy for a Friday morning. About half of the people in line were dressed in business attire. The other half had a few elderly people, with a few young families with their children. One of them was a mother that was wheeling their little baby girl in a stroller. The girl looked totally out of it, wrapped in a blanket as the line slowly inched forward. After waiting in the line for almost a half hour, it was both Jen and I’s turn to go through the TSA checkpoint. A different woman that I didn’t recognize was pointing to a tray. Since I was wearing a skirt, all of my belongings were in my backpack purse. They then had me set my backpack purse on the conveyor belt, while I walked to the other side. My sister Jen did the same thing with her belongings. To my relief, the woman never made a single question about the contents of my belongings in my backpack purse. The belongings that I had in the smaller pouch of my backpack purse included my phone, my wallet, and a couple of stray retractable pens, and sticky notes incase I wanted to think of any other game ideas for my streaming channel during our more than an hour and a half trip to Cleveland. I grabbed my backpack purse when it came through the other side of the conveyor. A few seconds later, Jen picked up her backpack purse. We walked forward into Terminal A. I looked at my clock again. It was 6:54 AM. I let out a small yawn, as I still felt tired from waking up so early in the morning. As we walked through the terminal looking for our gate, we received a lot of looks from different people around the airport. Airport staff and various passengers all giving us positive remarks of how fascinating we were. They found it fascinating to see a pair of twins both dressed in exactly the same outfit from head to toe and carrying the same purses on our backs. A number of them have asked us what the occasion was to which we gave the same response: “We’re going to the Twins Days Festival in Twinsburg, Ohio.” This usually resulted in a few quick exchanges before we had to bid them farewell. Jen and I found the gate where our flight would be taking off. A4. We sat down in some nearby chairs and talked about Twins Days for the next hour. During this time, we both got a group text from Tina and Trisha, the twins that we met in Twinsburg about a month ago. They mentioned that they were with their boyfriends and that they couldn’t pick us up (This was not an issue since my sister already had another rental). They told us that registration began at 2:00 at Twinsburg High School and to look for them. At around 7:46, I felt a loud rumble in my stomach. I turned my face to my sister and groaned. “I’m hangry.” I told her. “Are you?” Just then, I heard a growl come from Jen’s stomach. “Yes Jill. I’m a little hungry myself. Why don’t we get some breakfast at Dunkin’?” I nodded, as a feeling of delight came over my face. “Let’s get the sausage egg and cheese breakfast sandwich again and see who can finish it first!” Jen gave me what I could interpret to be a competitive smile and nodded. “You’re on! I let you have the last round but you’re going down this time!” Both Jen and I got in the short line at Dunkin’ and waited for a few minutes. The people behind us and in front of us also gave us positive remarks on the way we were dressed. A young man in glasses with his wife, who also wore glasses wanted a quick picture with us, so we took it. The one lone middle-aged woman behind us volunteered to take the picture. We thanked them and continued forward in the line. Both Jen and I got a sausage egg and cheese breakfast sandwich and our Dunkin’ mocha espressos. I made mine a large and Jen almost got a medium, but I talked her into a large. My rule for the weekend was that we order exactly the same thing. We took our food and drinks back to a set of seats near gate A4. The competition began, both of us holding our sandwiches in our hands. After the count of three, it began. We both ate our sandwiches, taking very generous bites. Jen seemed to be swallowing her food a little faster so I picked up my pace. But it was too late. As I was beginning to take my second to last bite, Jen placed the last bite in her mouth. She swallowed the sandwich just as I put the last bite in my mouth. She opened her mouth wide with an “ahhh’, indicating that there wasn’t a single piece of food left to chew. “I win!” Jen said, smiling. I swallowed my last bite of breakfast sandwich and gave her a sigh of defeat. “You win this round,” I told her, giving her my most competitive face. But it was all in fun. Both Jen and I laughed, and then glanced at our mocha espressos. We flipped the lids on the hot coffees and began sipping. I winced as I felt the sting on my tongue from the coffee. Still too hot. About 5 minutes later, our flight began boarding. When it got to our turn, both Jen and I boarded the plane. We walked through the passenger boarding bridge and got onto the airplane. As we walked down the aisle, I saw a few babies already sitting in their mother’s laps. I glanced at both my coffee that I was holding and my knee-length skirt, knowing that I shared something in common with the babies that were sitting there. When I sit down and drink my coffee, I am going to fill my pants, while I watch my twin sister squirm and hurry to a bathroom. Both Jen and I found 16D and 16F. I made myself comfortable in my window seat, hearing a noticeable crinkle as I sat down. Jen’s eyes darted towards me and she smiled, as I could only guess that she heard the same sound that I did. She glanced at me and whispered. “No accidents this time…” I nodded and tested the temperature of the coffee again. It was slightly hotter than warm, so I began gulping down the rest of my mocha espresso. I could taste the chocolatey syrup as I got to the bottom of the cup. Jen, on the other hand, took careful sips from her cup while I kept tapping my empty cup to rub it in. “Jill, I know what you are trying to do. If I drink this entire cup before we take off, I am going to have to pee so bad. You don’t want to see me have an accident, do you?” She gave me a playful face that indicated that she was only joking with me. About 10 minutes later, the plane began taxiing away from the gates and awaited its turn in the queue for the runway that it would be taking off from. A few minutes later, the plane began picking up speed. Faster and faster it went, before it defeated the laws of gravity. My ears started to pop as the altitude continued to increase. About 20 minutes later, I was hit with a very sharp sensation in my bladder. There was no way that I could hold it in for an hour this time. From my last bladder failure, I could only hold it in for 40 minutes now. With it just being 30 minutes, I could feel an intense warmth in my diaper as it began to swell and expand between my legs. After about 25 seconds, it was over. I grinned, now sitting in a very warm, wet, and squishy diaper. With the kind of face that Jen saw from me, she knew exactly what just happened. She whispered to me again. “I hope that doesn’t happen again or you may have a leak.” She then pointed to her coffee, which looked to be two-thirds full. I slouched a little, feeling the squishiness in my diaper. From my past experience with wearing diapers more often for the past month, I knew that my diaper could still hold at least another small wetting or two. My sister began looking at her cellphone while I got out my portable earbuds and began playing a playlist on Spotify. I listened to a few Muse songs. In the middle of the last song, I could feel my diaper getting warm once again. But it was only for a few seconds. Over the next hour, my bladder automatically operated itself on autopilot. It made several small trickles, which still wasn’t enough for the diaper to leak. I then glanced at my sister, who I noticed had an uncomfortable look on her face. She was starting to squirm and from the faded outline of her cup, it looked like she had only finished about three quarters of her coffee. She unbuckled her seatbelt, from which I could only draw one conclusion. She was not going to be able to make it to the bathroom after we landed. It had to be now, or I would be seeing my twin sister piss herself. The urgency filled my sister’s face as she leapt up from her seat and made a swift pace towards the back of the plane. A look of concern came over my face. Is Jen going to make it? Will she be having an accident? A couple minutes later, my sister returned to her seat. From what I saw, she was completely dry. There were no stains of pee running down the legs of her skirt. Meanwhile, I felt another brief period of warmth in my diaper. At this point, I didn’t know if it was a good idea for me to wear panties to Twinsburg High School. Was it worth the risk to see numerous sets of twins all stare at me while I piss myself? Within the next 10 minutes, the plane began its final descent onto the runway of Cleveland Hopkins International Airport. The plane touched down smoothly and began decelerating before it taxied towards the various passenger boarding bridges that connected to the gates. As the plane was finishing its connection to the bridge, I reached under my skirt and felt my diaper. It was very soaked at this point. I just knew that the bathroom was the first place that I would be stopping at after I got off the plane. We both stood up and awaited our turn to get off the plane. Jen showed me her coffee, which had just a couple sips left. She sipped the remaining lukewarm drops and resealed the top. After walking down the passenger boarding bridge, we exited through gate C8. From just walking from the plane to the gate, I felt a heavy sag in my diaper. I glanced at my sister, and she knew exactly what I wanted without me saying a word. “I kind of have to go, too.” Jen told me. “Let’s use the bathroom.” We entered the women’s bathroom, and I found a handicap stall that happened to be vacant. I entered and locked the stall. I then placed my backpack purse on the floor. I unzipped the main pouch and pulled out a plastic bag. I reached underneath my skirt and undid my diaper. I wadded it up and stuffed it in the plastic bag. I got out some baby wipes and began wiping the dried pee off myself. I got out a new diaper and unfolded it. I sat it above the toilet and sprinkled some Caldesene Baby Corn Starch powder on it. I then sprinkled a little in my hands and began rubbing it around my diaper area. I pressed the diaper against the wall and my butt against the diaper and proceeded to diaper myself while standing up. Having done this a few times at the mall on my dates with Gary, I was starting to get good at this. I tied up the plastic bag and zipped it back inside my backpack purse. After the diaper change, I washed my hands and dried them off with paper towels. My sister, who was already done, was standing outside of the bathroom, waiting. We then went to the baggage claim and found our luggage bags. I checked the cell phone. It was now 11:17 AM. It would still be a little more than two hours before registration began at Twinsburg High School. We left the airport with our bags and found the same rental place as before. The car that we ended up with was not a Chrysler Pacifica this time, but a red Toyota Camry SE. Jen checked the mileage and took a picture of it with her cellphone. She also took a picture of the fuel level and the range (which read 412 miles). We placed our four checked bags into the trunk and sat our backpack purses in the back seat. Jen got in the car and drove away from Cleveland Hopkins International Airport (CLE). We took Eastbound I-480 for about half an hour before getting off on Exit 36 for East Aurora Road. After turning onto the road, the hotel was at the very next intersection. Jen turned the Camry onto Wilcox Drive and we drove down the road, which led to the Hilton Garden Inn. She found a good parking spot and we got out of the car. Jen and I unloaded the trunk, and we took our luggage into the hotel. As we neared the entrance, I could see a few sets of twins all standing outside and having casual conversations. Once in the lobby, the check in line wasn’t too long. Just a couple of sets of twins in front of us. It was now 12:06 PM. I glanced at the set of twins standing in front of us. They were two petite Asian women, that stood a little shorter than us. “Hi!” I said with a smile. “I’m Jill.” “And I’m Jen.” My sister added. “What are your names?” The first one pointed to herself and smiled. “I’m Libby.” “I’m Lucy.” The second twin answered. “Is this your first time?” We both nodded. “It’s our third time.” Libby told us. “You are going to just love it. Registration is at the high school. You know how to get there, right?” Both my sister and I smirked. “Yes.” Jen told her. “Both Jill and I were here a month ago to help her move out of her apartment in Cleveland. We had some extra time to kill so we decided to visit Twinsburg…” At this point, it was now Libby and Lucy’s turn to check in. Libby turned around and smiled. “See you both at the high school!” After Libby and Lucy finished checking in, Jen had us checked in. The receptionist gave Jen two room keys. Jen gave one of them to me. When I looked at the sleeve, I saw that we would be staying in room 506. We wheeled both of our luggage bags behind us and entered the elevator that was nearby. I pressed the 5 button and the elevator door closed. From the way that the elevator moved, I could tell that it was pretty old and clunky. It was nothing like the brand-new elevator that was at Metro City Apartments back in Philadelphia. The elevator door opened, and we both walked down the hallway to find our room. We found room 506 and Jen used her card key against the reader. The light flashed and the door unlocked. We entered the room to find two nice queen-sized beds, prepared just for us. There was a desk, a refrigerator, plus a Keurig coffee maker. All the standard amenities that you would find in a hotel room. I looked at my cell phone and frowned. 12:21 PM. We still had another hour and a half. Within the next 45 minutes, I settled into my room. I unpacked a few of my outfits and put them in the drawers provided in the room. For the Wendy Darling costume, Jen hung both of our costumes on hangers in the closet. I got out my cell phone and let it charge for about a half hour. My twin sister Jen, too, had a lot of her things all organized where she wanted them. After that half hour, I pulled open the drawer and grabbed one of my two panties that I brought with me. Jen gave me a frown as if to say that I shouldn’t be putting them on as I would risk embarrassment at the high school. I pulled my cell phone off its charger and placed it in my right hand. I then walked towards the bathroom with the panties in one hand and cell phone in the other. Jen looked back at me, shaking her head. “Jill, you are going to have an accident if you put those panties on. I am not saying this to be mean, but you have had a terrible track record within the last few weeks. And the worst of that track record was within the last week. I am only looking out for you, and I don’t want you to embarrass yourself.” I shook my head and I continued towards the bathroom with my panties. “Just let me wear them. If I have an accident, then I will wear my diapers for the rest of the festival.” Jen gave me a reluctant nod. “Go ahead then. I don’t know when the accident will happen, but I know that it will happen. Don’t say that I didn’t warn you.” She picked up the other pair of panties out of the drawer. She looked at them and laughed. “And I don’t know why you packed two. You will not even be using it.” I proceeded into the bathroom and closed the door. Before I removed my diaper, I sat my cell phone and panties on the floor and lifted a little bit of my skirt above my waist to check the wetness indicator on my diaper. It was halfway between yellow and blue. I removed both tabs of my diaper and let it fall to my feet. I sat on the toilet and my cell phone began to vibrate against the tiled floor. I checked the caller ID. It was Glytter. As I reached down to pick up my phone, I could hear a few trickles of pee beginning to enter the toilet without any conscious effort. That accident in the toilet was not considered “peeing”, as I made no effort to concentrate and focus my bladder muscles on releasing the pee into the toilet. It happened without my prompting. I swiped the answer button and put it on speaker. “Hello?” “Hi Jill! It’s Glytter!” “Is that really you? I thought you had a daughter answer the phone.” I could hear laughter on the other end. “No Jill. I already told you. I’m a dwarf, so my voice sounds very high-pitched.” I gasped in disbelief upon hearing the tiny voice speaking to me. “Like a child’s?” “Yes Jill. I have had to live with my dwarfism my entire life. I just wanted to call you to see if you have settled into your room. Are you enjoying it in Twinsburg?” I heard a few more trickles of pee come out of the toilet without my prompting. “Yes. My sister and I will be registering at the high school at 2:00. We’ll keep you updated on all the details.” I looked at the diaper that was laying on the floor. Despite me getting to know Glytter a little more, she still doesn’t know about me wearing diapers and the recent issues that I have been experiencing with my worsening bladder control over the past month. “Sounds good, Jill. I have a few more ideas for additional emotes, but I will not be sending them to you until you have more of an audience. I’m guessing that you’ll be sorting all the emotes for all the sub tiers in your emote library when you get back?” I nodded. “Yes. It’s definitely my plan to do that after the Twins Days Festival.” I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my abdomen and another burst of pee came flooding out, followed by just occasional drops. “Okay. I’ll let you go so that you can enjoy Twins Days with your twin sister. Have fun!” I nodded. “I will!” “Bye Jill!” “Bye Glytter!” I hung up, and checked between my legs to see if I was still peeing. With no drops, I stood up from the toilet and wiped myself with a few squares of toilet paper. I then grabbed the panties. I pulled them up through my legs and past my ankles until they were snugly around my waist. I flushed the toilet and washed my hands. I checked the time. 12:59 PM. One hour left. About 25 minutes later, Jen suggested that both her and I go to the high school early. So far, my panties felt dry. I don’t know what my bladder problem was, but I couldn’t concentrate or focus my bladder muscles during that moment on the toilet. Either I’m able to hold it right now or I don’t have any urge to pee at the moment. We both grabbed our room keys with our backpack purses and left the room. We left the hotel in a red Toyota Camry and drove down Aurora Road to the high school. Having been to Twinsburg a month ago, we knew where we were going. We took the shortcut through the Twin Hills Highway and then a left onto Ravenna Road. When we got to the high school, we turned left onto the Joshua T. Miktarian Memorial Parkway. We pulled into the parking lot and park our car. We got out and grabbed our backpack purses. Just as we were leaving the car, we saw a white Toyota Camry XLE parking in a spot next to us. I kept walking forward when I heard my sister shouting. “Jill! Look!” I turned around and I saw two guys standing in front of their car, taking selfies. They both wore red sunglasses and were dressed in red tank tops with red tennis shoes with laces and one Velcro strap at the bottom. I nodded. “Let’s just get in line. We’ll see them soon enough.” We both walked towards the high school to discover that it doesn’t open until registration begins at 2:00. Despite that being the case, a line was starting to form outside the entrance. We got into the line and waited. Moments later, the red tank topped twins got into the line behind us. One of the two twins wore a gold cross necklace and was holding a red composition notebook. He glanced at me and gave his greeting. “Hi. I’m Kenneth.” “I’m Randy.” the other twin said. “What are your names?” Kenneth asked. I smiled. “I’m Jill!” “I’m Jen.” My sister added. “Where are you from?” Kenneth asked us. “Philadelphia.” We both said at the same time. Kenneth opened his composition notebook and wrote down the information that we gave him. I gave Kenneth a curious glance. “Where are you two from?” Kenneth grinned. “Cascade. It’s near Grand Rapids, Michigan.” He then gave us a curious glance. “Identical or Fraternal?” “Identical.” Both Jen and I said at the same time. “We’re fraternal.” Kenneth told us. Jen then smiled. “That’s surprising! You two don’t look fraternal! Might I ask you, Kenneth. What will you be doing with this information?” Kenneth grinned. “I will be including this information in a future blog. I already did this for last year. I’m trying to meet as many twins as possible. I got 161 last year. I’m trying to break that record for 2023!” Jen grinned. “Well, I hope that you do! Can you give me the website to your blog so that I can look up that post?” Kenneth nodded. “It’s www.kenscoolblog.com. Go to August 2022 and you should find it. Jen got her phone out of her backpack purse and typed in the site. She found the blog and glanced at it. “This is pretty neat! I see. So, you’re going to have an index of every twin that you met at the end of the post…” Kenneth nodded. “Yes. Nice talking to you two!” I smiled. “Same here!” “Hope you meet lots of twins!” Jen added. “Wait…What number are we?” “Seven.” Kenneth answered. “I already met six sets of twins yesterday…” I gasped. “Wow. You came down early…” We continued chatting until another set of twins got in line behind them. We continued forward and waited for the high school to open while feeling the heat of the sunny day. Finally, at around 2:03, the doors to the high school opened. We all filed in and followed the line through the main hall towards the auditorium. Once inside, we saw a bunch of other sets of twins as we made our way towards the front stage. At the front stage, we went to the pre-registration line and got our name tags. We both wrote our names down on the name tags, with Jen reminding me to write Twin A next to my name. Jen wrote Twin B next to her name. On the reverse side of our name tags, I saw our registration number: 1254. The name tags could be worn like a lanyard so we put them on so that other twins could identify us. After leaving the auditorium, both Jen and I took it all in. There were twins everywhere of all ages in the cafeteria. The youngest twins had parents carrying them around or wheeling them in strollers. All twins under the age of 18 were accompanied by a parent or responsible guardian. Besides that, no other parents were there, as this event was not open to the public. We then saw a stout set of male twins standing there with big enthusiastic smiles near a cafeteria table. “Hi!” They both shouted in unison. “Welcome to Twins Days!” I glanced at the jovial duo and smiled. “Who are you two?” “I’m Steven!” The first one shouted. “And I’m Stanley!” the second one shouted. Steven looked at us two. “I don’t think that I’ve seen you two here before. What are your names?” “I’m Jill!” I told Steven. “And I’m Jen!” my sister told him. “You two seem like you’re enjoying it! It’s our first time! Is this your first time?” The two exchanged glances and laughed. “Oh no no no!” Steven shouted. “It’s our 29th time!” They both shouted in unison. Both of our jaws dropped open. “29th?” Jen gasped. “Then do you know Tina and Trisha? It’s their 24th time!” They both nodded. “Yup!” Steven shouted. “We’ve known them for quite a few years.” I smiled. “How old are you two?” “31!” they both shouted. That’s when I felt a tap behind me. “Jill!” I turned around and saw that it was Tina. Trisha was standing right next to her. Both twins were in yellow summer dresses. Trisha glanced at Jen and smiled. “Jen!” “Hey Tina and Trisha!” Steven and Stanley shouted in unison. “Nice outfits!” Steven shouted. “Are you two going to win another look-alike contest?” Both twins exchanged glances and nodded. “Yup!” Trisha said with a grin. “We’re also going to be in the talent show!” “So are we!” Stanley said, grinning. “But our costume for tomorrow is a secret!” At that moment, both Kenneth and Randy were in the cafeteria. Kenneth got out his red composition notebook and began interviewing more twins, including Steven and Stanley. “So, you two are from Chicago?” Kenneth asked him. They both nodded. “And how many times have you been attending Twins Days?” Kenneth asked Steve. “It’s our 29th time!” they both shouted. Kenneth smiled. “It’s our third time.” After the interview, Kenneth wanted to get pictures of us with Steven and Stanley and Tina and Trisha. We both stood there and got all the pictures with everyone’s phone, including mine and Jen’s. After that, Kenneth interviewed Tina and Trisha. After the interview, both twins took us aside. Tina smiled. “How would you like to eat at the Blue Canyon Kitchen & Tavern for an early dinner?” Both Jen and I nodded. “We already have reservations!” Jen told her. “They’re early as well.” Just then, I saw a few drops of pee trickle to the floor. My heart sank. I looked up at my skirt. The trickles of pee continued. That’s when I felt the pee running down my legs and onto the cafeteria floor. Great. I just pissed myself again! Both Tina and Trisha glanced at me and gasped. All the nearby twins who saw the accident were surprised. A set of girl twins that looked a little younger than Jen and I were shocked. “That’s too bad!” one of them shouted. “We’re going to clean it all up, okay? Tina then hugged me. “Jill, I’m very sorry.” Trisha nodded. “If it makes you feel better Jill, I actually had to use a Poise pad the other day. I’m a very heavy sleeper, but I’m dry most of the time. It’s really nothing to be ashamed of. Incontinence is more common than you think with us women. About 40% of us will experience some kind of incontinence.” A set of middle-aged female twins nodded. “Just wait until you have a bunch of children!” one of them smiled. I sighed, as none of this was helping. My panties were soaked. My skirt was fine just as long as I didn’t sit down on it. Jen then looked at both of them. “Excuse me. I need to talk to my sister alone for a moment…” Both twins nodded, as Jen jerked me by the hand. As my twin sister pulled me towards the bathroom, her eyes began to well up with tears. By the time that we entered the woman’s bathroom, she was bawling. She took me into a handicap bathroom stall and closed the door. “Jill!” she said with a loud sob. “I warned you! You wanted to wear your ‘big girl’ panties, but I’m afraid that you can’t wear them anymore. You embarrassed yourself in front of all of them! Is it worth it, Jill?” I pulled down my soaked panties and let them slide down my ankles and legs until they hit the floor in a wet squish. “You tell me, Jen! What the hell is wrong with me? I had a nice dinner with you and your boyfriend on my first night in Philadelphia. You treated me to wine and I get drunk. Since that night, I have not stopped pissing myself. I pissed the bed over and over and then needed diapers at night. Then my bladder issues get worse and worse. So, is it worth it, Jill? Putting on these panties just to try to be normal? Since that first night Jen, my bladder is all fucked up. So, you tell me if it’s worth it!” Jen continued crying while I began to give up hope of ever being a normal woman again. Babies wear diapers, not 21-year-old women. So, I guess I’m a baby now. Time for Baby Jill to put on another diaper… After a few moments, my sister started to hug me, with still a few tears coming out of her eyes. “I love you Jill…” she wept. “I don’t know why you ever started to have accidents like this, but I don’t want this for you. I don’t want this for anyone. I just want you to be normal. But do you know what, Jill? None of us really have a choice as to what happens to us and why. All we get to decide is how to handle the situations and circumstances that we deal with every day. Now, are you going to resist the change in your life, or are you going to except the new changes as they are?” She glanced at the diaper that I was taking out of the backpack purse. “If I could, Jill, I would want to take on the hardship that you are struggling with. All of it. Every trial. Every tribulation. Every embarrassing accident that you have experienced. Just so my Jillian doesn’t have to suffer like this anymore. Just give me the padding. Just give me the protection. Just give me the diapers and take all the incontinence away from my sister. Please…” She wiped a few more tears out of her eyes. I was finished wiping with baby wipes and powdering my new diaper so I held the diaper against the wall and pressed my behind against it, diapering myself while standing up. “But you know what, Jill? It’s not my cross to bear. It’s yours. Think about that. Are you just going to throw your cross on the ground or are you going to carry it? Please carry it.” I nodded and pulled my skirt back down to cover my diaper. My sister took one of my plastic bags out of my backpack purse and placed the soaked panties inside it. She then zipped the plastic bag in her backpack purse and gave me another hug. “Come on, Jill. Tina and Trisha are waiting…” I exited the bathroom with my twin sister to see both Tina and Trisha waiting outside the bathroom. They both hugged and I just stared at them for a while. There were no words. Just two girls who deeply cared about me. After a few minutes of silence, I started crying. They both patted me on the back. “It will be okay, Jill.” Tina told me. “How about we go back to your hotel? We’ll have a nice dinner at the Blue Canyon Kitchen & Tavern, okay?” Trisha nodded. “Don’t worry about that puddle. They cleaned up the mess, Jill…” They cleaned up the mess…Those words kept repeating in my mind as the four of us left the high school. It was my mess, but they cleaned it. There was no laughing. There was no shaming. They all genuinely cared. It must be a thing that all twins have… I was still lost in my thoughts as my sister drove me back to the Hilton Garden Inn. It was 2:56, so there was still one hour to kill before the 4:00 reservation. An hour passed and we met both Tina and Trisha at the Blue Canyon Kitchen & Tavern. We added them to the reservation, so we had a party of four. Coincidentally, I saw Kenneth and Randy both entering the restaurant with what looked like their parents. I’m guessing that the parents wanted to come along for the festivities tomorrow… We entered the restaurant, and a hostess seated us. We then made our orders. Both Jen and I got the Lobster Cannelloni and a bowl of Lobster Bisque. We both shared a chocolate bomb. What made this dinner even funnier was that Tina and Trisha both ordered the same things as us. When given the option for drinks, I loudly refused. I had a glass of water with my dinner instead. After the dinner, both Tina and Trisha followed us in their car to the hotel and we took them up to our room. After we were all in the room, Trisha looked at me immediately. “So, did you have something to change into besides the panties? You’re wearing protection, aren’t you?” I nodded and lifted my skirt. Sure enough, there was a yellow patch in the crotch area and the wetness indicator was almost blue. “Before you even ask Trisha, they’re Certainty Unisex Fitted Briefs from Walgreens.” Trisha nodded. “I also didn’t want to tell you this at the high school. Those Poise Pads that I mentioned? I just bought some for this weekend, just in case. My last accident was about three months ago…” Jen nodded. “Where do you two live now? You said that you were moving to Twinsburg…” They both nodded. “We live on Twin Hills Highway.” Tina told her. “You know, that road that cuts through Aurora all the way to Ravenna.” “We went that way!” Jen gasped. “Then you passed our house!” Trisha said with a smile. We all talked for about an hour. Trisha shared a few more of her accident stories with me, trying to make me feel better. But from that lengthy conversation, she gave me one good bit of advice. “You gotta own it, Jill.” She told me. “Don’t let it own you.” After an hour of conversation, they both exchanged glances. “We’re going back to the high school.” She told us. “We’re going to find a lot of good twin friends for you to meet, okay?” Jen gasped. “How are we going to find you? What is your costume going to be?” Tina pointed to her name tag. “One, we will be wearing our name tags.” “And two, we will be dressing up as Tinkerbell!” Trisha added. “What are you two going to be?” “Wendy!” We both shouted. Tina laughed. “We both have Peter Pan costumes? This friendship was totally meant to be!” “Totes!” Trisha said with a grin. “See you tomorrow!” They both shouted in unison. Both Tina and Trisha left our room, leaving Jen and me to relax. I changed into my diaper for the evening and both Jen and I put on our matching Ocean Breeze Joyspun Women’s Short Sleeve T-Shirt and Joggers Pajama set and smiled. It was not every day that we wore matching pajamas but for this Twins Days Festival, we would be. We both took selfies to treasure the moment and I made a post about it on Instagram. After that, I was tired. I brushed my teeth and got into my queen-sized bed. The big day was tomorrow so I needed to make sure that I got plenty of rest. Both Tina and Trisha told us about the Double Take Parade that would be taking place tomorrow morning at 9:00. Our hotel offered a complimentary breakfast for all the twins staying at the Hilton Garden Inn, so we want to get up early enough to take advantage of that. Despite the embarrassment that I experienced for day one, I knew that tomorrow was going to be a good day. Being very tired, I closed my eyes and fell asleep. While I was sleeping, I had a very strange dream. I woke up, thinking that I was awake, but I was wearing a blue nightgown and felt a bow in my hair. I then saw a shadow from what looked like a flying boy. A tiny fairy was flying around near the shadowed boy that still didn’t make himself known. And that’s when the realization hit me. I was Wendy Darling from Peter Pan, which meant that I was in London. The other Darling children were still sleeping, and Peter wanted to take me for a fly. I couldn’t fly until Peter gave me some pixie dust from Tinker Bell. Full of pixie dust, I flew out of the window holding Peter’s hand and he took me to Neverland. Right after Peter took me to Neverland, he morphed into my boyfriend Gary. He told me to lay down so that he could change my diaper. At this point, my diaper was really soaked. Just as he was about to grab and peel back the tabs, I woke up. Before I could even sit up, I felt an intense need to pee. About a couple seconds later, my bladder released and I felt an intense warmth in my diaper. But the stream was coming out so fast that the pee began to leak out the sides and soak my pajama bottoms. A large patch of pee began to expand beneath me on the fitted sheet. I glanced at the alarm clock in the hotel room. 3:07 AM. I still had another three hours to sleep… I got out of bed and used the flashlight on my cell phone to grab another set of pajamas. While my pajama pants were totally soaked, a little bit of the shirt was also wet. As I grabbed my backpack purse and spare pajamas, my sister stirred in her bed. Relieved that she didn’t wake up, I quietly sauntered towards the bathroom. I changed into a new diaper and new pajamas and left the bathroom. I felt the fitted sheet to determine where the pee patch ended and slept on the dry side of my bed, careful not to roll onto the area that I pissed on. Did I say that I slept? For the next three hours, I didn’t really sleep that well. My sister woke up to glance at the evidence of my accident on the floor. My pajama pants and shirt were piled on the floor. She looked up at me with a frown. “Oh Jill…Did you have an accident?” I nodded, pulling back the covers of my queen-sized bed to show the large patch of pee towards the middle of the fitted sheet. Jen then gave me a curious stare. “You didn’t wear the other panties, did you?” I shook my head. “No. My panties are still in the drawer. I peed my diaper so hard last night that it leaked out both sides. I had to change into a new one.” Jen got out of her bed and gave me a hug. “It will be okay, Jill. Let’s get ready and get our costumes on!” I sighed and got out of bed. My sister let me go first. I took off my slightly damp diaper and took a shower. After the shower, I put on a new diaper and got into my Wendy Darling costume. I opened the checked bag that had extra diapers in it and stuffed five diapers into my backpack purse. From the trip to Philadelphia, I used up all four of my diapers in my purse, including the fifth one that I wore the morning of the flight to Cleveland. With the five that I took from the checked baggage, I only had 10 diapers left. I also took the Aquaphor from the checked bag and placed it in my purse in case I had any rashes to deal with later on. I also swapped the Caldesene Baby Corn Starch powder for the larger Johnson & Johnson baby powder, since I only wanted to use the smaller powder for traveling. I did the same with the baby wipes, as I needed more than a few if I was going to be out all day. With my backpack purse that doubled as my diaper bag all ready to go, I waited for my sister to get out of the shower. Moments later, the bathroom door opened, and she dressed herself in her Wendy costume. We then stood by the bathroom and curled each other’s hair, letting all seven curls droop behind our necks. Jen carefully tied the bow in my hair to keep all the curls together and I did the same for her hair. We put on our black flats and finished our faces with some makeup. When we were done, I was convinced that we were both Wendy Darling. “Are ya ready?” My sister said, beginning to practice her British accent. “I surely am!” I answered as Wendy Darling. “We need ta find Peter!” I glanced at my cell phone. 6:48 AM. 100% battery. We zipped our room keys in the smaller pouches of our backpack purses and put on our purses before grabbing our cell phones. We exited the hotel room and began gracefully walking down the hallway. We took the elevator downstairs and went to the ballroom where breakfast was being served. I could not believe my eyes. All the tables in the hallway near the ballroom entrance were full of food warmers, each with a different breakfast item. Bacon, Sausage, Pancakes, Eggs, Potatoes. Fresh fruit sat on another table, along with some fruit pastries. Strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, honeydew, and raspberries. Feeling very hungry, I grabbed an empty plate and began piling three strips of bacon, two sausages, three mini pancakes, a couple scoops of eggs, and one large scoop of potatoes. I drizzled syrup on my pancakes, added Tabasco sauce to my eggs, and squirted ketchup on my potatoes before I entered the ballroom where a bunch of empty round tables sat. My sister was right behind me with a similar plate, and we found a empty table towards the center of the room. As we ate our food, we saw Kenneth and Randy again from yesterday, carrying their plates of food into the ballroom. I grimaced, hoping that they didn’t see my embarrassing accident at the high school yesterday. Instead of sitting next to us, they sat next to a pair of Hispanic female twins. After Jen and I ate our food, we made a smaller plate with one scoop of fruit and one fruit pastry. After eating the second plate, we poured some cups of coffee to go and left the ballroom. The time was now 7:43 AM. From what I heard from Tina and Trisha, a shuttle was supposed to take us from the hotel to the lineup area for the Twins Days Double Take Parade. This shuttle was leaving at 8:00 AM, so we had about 20 minutes left. After 20 minutes, I saw Kenneth and Randy again, only they were dressed up like Captain Jack Sparrow. Before I could glance at them any longer, Jen was yanking me by the hand, which prompted me to turn around and hurry with her towards the bus that was about to take off. We got on the bus, and the Jack Sparrow twins got on the bus a couple of minutes later. Within five minutes, we were at the parade lineup site. It was 8:12 when Jen and I got off the bus. The parade was in about 50 minutes. I was amazed as I walked all around to see twins of all ages each dressed in unique costumes that all reflected the theme of Twins Days for the 2023 year: Shiver Me TWINbers! There were twin pirates everywhere. There was twin Captain Hooks, twin Spongebobs, twin mermaids, twin crocodiles, twin treasure chests, and various other costumes that reflected this year’s theme. For the next hour, both Jen and I talked to various twins around the parade lineup. While I couldn’t even tell that I was wet at all, I was sure that I had a small wetting or two at this point. The parade started at around 9:00 AM and the line slowly inched forward onto the street from the Twinsburg town square, towards Ravenna Road. It took about 45 minutes to get from the town square to the festival grounds past the high school. About halfway through the parade, I could feel a churning in my abdomen. The result of drinking that cup of coffee before getting on the bus from the hotel. While I was able to hold in my bowel movements, I was not so fortunate with my bladder. Immediately, I felt my diaper get warm and begin to expand and swell between my legs. Even though I was slowly walking with my sister, I was soaking my diaper without any conscious effort. Fortunately, the warmness stopped, and I continued waddling down the parade route. When my sister saw my awkward gait, words were not needed as she immediately knew what had just happened. She approached my ears, trying to speak as softly as possible. “When you get to the grounds, find the nearest port-a-potty ASAP…” I nodded, as I knew how soggy the diaper felt between my legs. It was very smart that I chose to pack five diapers, as I was already about to change into the first one. The parade route gradually passed an elevated stage area, where all of the members of the Twins Days Royal Court sat. Some announcer with a microphone was speaking to passersby in an elevated booth, asking questions to various twins and trying to keep things entertaining. Questions included where are you from, who traveled the furthest, and similar questions. After we passed that area, we were coming up to the high school and passed it. The parade route ended at the RB Chamberlin Middle School. We turned on the road leading into the school, which led to the festival grounds behind it. We walked to the registration area. Since we were already registered, they strapped plastic bracelets around our wrists, which allowed us to walk the festival grounds all day. In feeling the soggy diaper around my legs, I desperately needed to get to the nearest port-a-potty. I felt another bowel movement and closed my two cheeks together to prevent myself from messing my diaper. Both Jen and I continued forward towards a road that led back to the high school. Just past this road was the entrance to the festival gates. With our bracelets, the staff working at the gates let us right in, while non-twins had to pay the admission price to enter the festival. Jen immediately pointed out a row of about 20 port-a-potties. The ones furthest down were handicapped, so I found the first vacant handicap port-a-potty and entered it. Just as I entered it, I could no longer hold in the massive load that was about to be released. I felt the back of my diaper begin to fill with a warm gooey mass which I tried not to press against the wall as this would smear the poop from the diaper onto my skin. After the load finished, I had my work cut out for me. I took off my black flats and socks and lifted up my blue Wendy nightgown so that it was out of the way. I carefully removed my diaper and held it. I saw a few drops of poop hit the floor of the port-a-potty. I quickly grabbed some toilet paper to stop the messy flow. I unzipped my backpack purse and got out a pack of Pampers Aqua Pure Baby Wipes. I alternated between the baby wipes and the toilet paper to get everything cleaned up. I disposed the wipes into the port-a-potty with the toilet paper. For good measure, I squirted a couple globs of Aquaphor on my fingers and rubbed it all over my diaper area. I then powdered a new diaper and rubbed some additional powder into my skin to prevent chafing for later. Finally, I diapered myself while standing up and carefully made adjustments to my diaper to maximize comfort before I pulled the folds of my nightgown back down below my waist. I carefully put my socks and black flats back on and exited the port-a-potty. I used the nearby soap and hand washing station that they had outside of the port-a-potty’s and found my twin sister Jen standing nearby. Although my twin sister wasn’t my mother, her face gave off what I could only interpret to be something resembling a motherly instinct. “Are you good, Jen?” I nodded but realized that I had the dirty diaper inside my purse in a plastic bag. The other used diapers were thrown away in the trash in our room before leaving. I gestured my hand, pointing at my purse. My sister nodded and pointed at a nearby trash bin. Not caring who saw me at this point, I unzipped my purse and tossed the plastic bag containing my soiled diaper in the trash bin. The twins nearby didn’t really say anything about what I was throwing away. I could only guess that they thought that it was none of their fucking business. Now in the festival grounds, Jen smiled as she held out her cell phone. “I took a few pictures of other twins while you were in the port-a-potty.” She said, as she began showing me all of the pictures. “Tina and Trisha also texted us and wanted us to meet them by the food stalls just ahead.” I smiled and nodded. “Are we having lunch with them?” Jen nodded. “Yes Jill. They also have a few more sets of twin friends to introduce us to later.” But before we did that, I noticed different pin boards depicting different maps where twins could pin where they’re from. I wanted to do this with my sister, along with the Twins Days Mirror. We did the pins first. We looked for the map of the United States and placed our one pin on Philadelphia. The Twins Days Mirror took longer since there was a line for it. After about 10 minutes, it was our turn to stand on either side of the illusory mirror and attempted to make perfect poses of our twin reflection. We both pressed our right hand forward and made a silly face while another person took our pictures with our cell phones. After the silly face, we did two more poses. We did our best Wendy pose before doing a double hi-five for our last pose, trying really hard to match each other’s facial expression. After we finished the mirror, we continued forward through the festival grounds and turned left, which led to a few food stalls. Near the Gyro vendor, I saw a pair of Tinker Bells that smiled when we made eye contact. “Tina!” We both shouted. “Trisha!” Our twin friends hugged us. “How about we all get a Gyro?” Tina suggested. “Both Trisha and I have tried all the food from the vendors from over the years, and the Gyros are pretty decent.” Trisha pointed to a Dippin’ Dots vendor ahead. “And let’s get some Dippin’ Dots for dessert!” “I love Gyros…” I said with a grin. Jen gave me a playful jab. “Jill, you love virtually every food!” My sister was not wrong about that. When it came to food, I was a real critic. Besides news, makeup, and video games, food was another strong passion that I would definitely classify as a hobby. The four of us all bought Gyros with a bottled water to wash it down. We found a set of picnic tables just to the left of the Dippin’ Dots vendor and sat down. We ate our Gyros and enjoyed each other’s company. While I was in the middle of eating my Gyro, Trisha tapped my shoulder. She glanced around to ensure that no one else was nearby. “Jill, it happened again last night. After three months of being dry, I soaked another Poise Pad last night.” Even though Trisha was my new friend, I still felt self-conscious about others knowing about my bladder issues. My face reddened and my diaper felt a little warm again. At this point, I can’t remember the last time that I peed in the toilet on purpose. “And what am I supposed to say about that, Trisha?” “You’re supposed to say that you own it, Jill.” Trisha told me. “That accident happened to me unexpectedly last night. But do you know what, Jill? I owned it. Trust me. You will feel a lot better when you stand up and own it.” Tina nodded. “She’s right. If it’s something that you can’t control, there’s no point in fretting about it. Don’t let it dictate what kind of day you will have. Just learn to wear your incontinence with confidence.” I casually nodded as I finished my Gyro. “Thanks Tina and Trisha.” We all finished our Gyros and got Dippin’ Dots for dessert. Both Jen and I got a Chocolate Mega Size and Tina and Trisha got a Cookies and Cream Mega Size. Psyche! They both also ended up getting chocolate. After the Dippin’ Dots, the four of us walked towards the amphitheater for the contests and got in line to see how we would place. Considering how pleased the judges looked, we were all invited to the final line on stage to be judged on our costumes in front of an audience of twins and other onlookers. When I heard the results, I was shocked. Both Jen and I got third place for our Wendy Darling costumes. A set of twins that were mermaids got second place. And the first place went to Tina and Trisha for their Tinker Bell costumes. And considering the detail that they put into the costume, I can see how they got first. Their costumes lit up and their wings looked so much like the ones that I saw in the movie. Their lime green leotard dresses were cut at the perfect length at the hips and their wings hung perfectly behind their backs. Their golden blonde hair was parted over their right eye with their hair in a messy bun behind it. Their eye liner and lipstick matched Tinker Bell to a tee. They even had lime green slippers with white puffs that matched their dresses. And that was only the costume. They even had a magic wand and pixie dust as props. Having seen this movie literally a dozen times, I can say that this was the best Tinker Bell that I have ever seen. We all walked off the stage and got into the photo area for everyone to take pictures of the first, second, and third place contestants. Both Jen and I gave our Wendy poses for all the cell phones that snapped pictures of us. After the pictures were done, we stepped off the stage of the photo area and took selfies of each other. Tina and Trisha then introduced us to a few other twin friends before retreating to a tent near the food vendors to prepare for the talent show. A lot of the twin friends that we met were dressed up as pirates, and we followed them into the mainstage tent to watch the talent show. The talent show, overall, was very entertaining. The acts that I loved the most included one from Steven and Stanley and a wonderful performance from Tina and Trisha. We found ourselves sitting next to their twin boyfriends, so we had a good conversation with them. Steven and Stanley sang a popular song from Toy Story. Tina and Trisha sang a medley of different songs, concluding with “Total Eclipse of the Heart”. I was blown away with just how talented their singing voices were. With Tina and Trisha being the last act, we got up and left the tent. My attention was interrupted by Jen, who pointed to the souvenir stand, which was very close to the tent that we exited. “Jill,” she said. “Let’s get a Twins Days t-shirt!” We each got a T-shirt displaying this year’s theme on it, and also bought a pair of red sunglasses that looked very similar to the ones that Kenneth and Randy were wearing. After we bought the souvenirs, we found Tina and Trisha standing next to us again. “They’re going to take the picture at 3:30,” Tina told me, pointing to the football field ahead of us. “I love the picture!” Trisha added. All the twins get into the shot and a set of twins on cherry pickers will be taking the shot. Make sure you are within the marked boundary if you want to be in the shot. And don’t be late!” The time was now 2:42, and I was so distracted and having so much fun that I suddenly realized how wet my diaper was. I saw a nearby set of port-a-potty’s and glanced at Jen, pointing to the port-a-potty’s. Jen nodded and followed me. “I actually have to go too.” My sister told me. “It’s probably best to do it now before the picture.” I found another handicap port-a-potty and entered it. Since this was only a wet diaper, it didn’t take too long for me to wipe, cream, powder, and change into a new one. With just three diapers left in my purse, I placed the wet diaper into the plastic bag. The smell wouldn’t be that noticeable so I decided to wait to throw it away later. After I got out of the bathroom, I followed Jen with Tina and Trisha to the football field to take the big picture at 3:30. Both Tina and Trisha’s twin boyfriends, who were dressed up as Peter Pan, stood next to them. When Jen and I shared that we live in Philadelphia, their eyes lit up. From our conversation, I learned their names. Robert and Ronnie. “We will definitely have to hang out sometime!” Robert said with a grin. “We live about 15 miles from Philly.” I nodded and noticed that they were about to take the picture. At precisely 3:30, the picture was taken. After the picture, I wanted to go back to the food vendors with Jen. I gave Jen a pleading smile. “Can we go back to the vendors? I would like to split a funnel cake with you.” “Why certainly Jill!” Jen acquiesced. “I would be more than delighted!” We said goodbye to Tina and Trisha and walked back to the vendors. We ordered a funnel cake with powdered sugar and chocolate drizzle and split it in half. Well, we tore it since we didn’t have any sharp knife to cut it with. After finishing the funnel cake, we had sticky powdered sugar and chocolate syrup all over our hands. We laughed, making our way to the hand wash station near the port-a-potty’s. We washed the powdered sugar and chocolate syrup off our hands and made our way back to the festival gate. I got a call from Tina, and I answered it. “Hi!” I answered. “Hey Jill! How would you and Jen like to have dinner at Sushi En with Robert and Ronnie?” “Tell her it’s okay!” Jen shouted. “It’s okay!” I shouted. “Okay! Meet us at the festival gate. We’ll drive you there. Don’t worry about our boyfriends. They drove over here in their rental. See you in a few!” I hung up and walked with my twin sister out of the festival gate. Within a couple of minutes, I saw both Tina and Trisha sitting there with their boyfriends. Seeing them so happy really made me miss Gary. Gary owes me a date when I get back to Philadelphia… A golf cart arrived at the end of the road, waiting to take new passengers back to the high school parking lot. Both Jen and I were about to walk past a set of female twins when we stopped. When they saw that we knew them, they gave us approval to cut them and join our friends. When we saw that only the four of us could fit on one cart, the boyfriends gave us permission to go on ahead, as they would catch the next golf cart. We all hung on, and the golf cart sped down the Joshua T. Miktarian Memorial Parkway towards the high school. About two minutes later, we were at the parking lot to the high school that Jen and I were at yesterday. We got off and walked towards the parking lot. Tina showed us the way to their car, which was a white 2019 Chevy Malibu. I got into the back with Jen, while Trisha rode shotgun with Tina. Just as we were leaving, we saw the golf cart carrying Robert and Ronnie on it. They took us all the way to Sushi En, which was right across the street from the Hilton Garden Inn. Tina reserved a table for six while we waited for the other twins to arrive. Once they got there, we all ordered our food. Both Jen and I split a vegetable tempura and we each got a Hot Mama roll and a Drunken Tiger roll. Tina, Trisha, and their boyfriends all got different appetizers and rolls. For dessert, both Jen and I got the mochi ice cream. Two strawberry mochi balls and two chocolate mochi balls. But it wasn’t just the mochi that made it good. It was topped with whipped cream and drizzled with chocolate and strawberry syrup. It was both rich and delicious, making me experience what I could only describe as a foodgasm. Or dessertgasm in this case. When I came off the high of my dessertgasm, Trisha got my attention. “Jill and Jen.” Trisha said. “Would you two like to go to the Bertram Inn? All of us, including a bunch of friends are going. Since you and Jen are first timers, just know that the Bertram is THE place to go if you want to party.” This made my twin sister sigh. “I don’t think we can do that.” Jen told her. “Both Jill and I want to see the fireworks tonight. If we go to the Bertram after that, it will be too late.” Tina nodded. “Okay Jill. We’ll drive both of you back to the hotel.” We paid for our dinners and left the restaurant with Tina and Trisha. Once back at the hotel, Tina and Trisha said goodbye to us. “It was fun spending the day with you two!” Tina told us. “And let’s not forget last night!” Trisha added. “We’ll see you two tomorrow for Sunday!” The white Chevy Malibu drove off. Both Jen and I entered the hotel. Jen did a quick load of laundry, washing our Wendy Costumes, my soaked panties, and my wet pajamas from last night. With it being 5:17, there were still about 4 hours before the fireworks began at 9:30. While Jen was doing this, I changed into a new diaper, along with a black crop top and a navy-blue knee-length skirt. Jen matched the same outfit, and we spent a little bit of time relaxing in the room while the laundry finished washing and drying. I checked my bed and found brand new bedding on it. This was a relief, as I didn’t want to sleep on my dried piss tonight. After the laundry dried, Jen took care of all the clothes. It was 6:47, so we decided to head down to the lobby. There weren’t a lot of people down there, so we headed back to Twinsburg High School. Jen parked the red Toyota Camry, and someone took us back to the festival grounds on a golf cart. Once there, we went back through the front gate. We spent the next few hours talking to twins while we enjoyed the bands playing from the mainstage tent. At 9:30, the fireworks happened. Both Jen and I saw them, and they were beautiful. With me not sleeping that well, I felt very tired at this point. I walked with my sister back to the parking lot. The golf carts were not in service, so we had to walk the entire half mile stretch back to the high school. Once back at the Hilton Garden Inn, I was ready to collapse. I changed into my nighttime diaper and freshly washed pajamas and checked my purse for tomorrow. I had just one diaper left so I ended up not using all five of them. I took it out to use for tomorrow morning and added another five for Sunday. Only six diapers left for this trip… I brushed my teeth, flossed, and rinsed with mouthwash. I got into my bed, and I fell asleep within a couple minutes. I woke up to feel a soft tap on my shoulder. “Jill? Would you like to go for a swim with me?” I sat up and checked the cell phone. 6:34 AM. I then checked the bedding. While the bedding was indeed dry this time, my diaper was completely soaked. But on a positive note, I did “sleep like a baby”. I reluctantly agreed to my sister’s early morning fitness regimen. Considering how she sharply disapproved of me wearing my panties now, I was surprised that she would actually invite me to swim in the swimming pool, despite the potential risk of me accidentally peeing in the swimming pool during our swim due to my inability to control my bladder. She was already in her athletic two-piece swimsuit, waiting for me to put mine on. It was a Royal Blue Mohiass Bikini Set. Wasting no time, I undressed in front of my sister and tore off my wet diaper. I pulled open the drawer and put on my two-piece swimsuit, which also matched my twin sister’s. We took the elevator down to the pool and began our swim. To my relief, both Jen and I were the only ones in the swimming pool. As I jumped into the pool, I could feel the cold water around my skin. Just then, I felt something warm in the water. I swam forward, and Jen swam behind me, by the warm spot that I left behind. Jen looked at me and sighed. “Jill, you just peed in the pool.” I sighed in embarrassment. “Again Jen, I think it has been about two or three weeks since I have consciously peed on the toilet. Yes, there has been times that I peed on the toilet, but it was without any conscious effort and exertion of any of my muscles.” Jen nodded as she looked at me with concern. “Jill, I think that you should see a doctor about your bladder issue. Over the past month, your continence has gotten worse. Your more frequent use of diapers during the day has exacerbated the problem. It is done so to the point where I don’t think your bladder muscles can hold in any pee anymore.” I shook my head. “On the airplane, I was able to hold in my bladder for 30 minutes.” Jen nodded. “That’s only 30 minutes! What I want you to do is to start timing how long you can hold your bladder. Try some Kegel exercises. It might help in strengthening your bladder muscles.” As I swam past her, I could feel the warmth once again. Jen, who was right next to me, felt the warmth and sighed. “Jill, you just did it again. Get out of the pool and go change into a diaper. I thought that we could have a nice swim without this being a problem, but I thought wrong…” I got out of the pool and my sister joined me. We got upstairs and I got ready. I took my shower and changed into a new diaper. We both put on an orange crop top with a white knee-length skirt. For Sunday, it was pretty much less busy than Saturday, in terms of activity. We had breakfast in the ballroom again. We saw the same Hispanic twins eating breakfast in the ballroom as yesterday. Both Jen and I introduced ourselves and I found out that their names were Diana and Lorena. They were both from Tucson, Arizona. Jen and I had a lighter version of the delicious plate that I had yesterday. After the breakfast, my twin sister took me to the high school for the last day of the Twins Days Festival. The golf cart took us down the half-mile stretch to the festival grounds. Although chapel was scheduled for 9:00, we arrived 20 minutes early. We once again saw Tina and Trisha there. I was surprised to see them both there, considering that they were at the Bertram last night. I could see both of them yawning and squinting their eyes. To summarize, chapel was pretty good. The message had to do with carrying our own cross and taking responsibility for circumstances that we couldn’t control. This freaked me out as this was the same exact thing that Jen told me Friday in the high school bathroom. How did she know to tell me this? This really got me thinking about her faith and what it really meant to her. After all, Joey introduced it to her, and she seems to really be running with it. There is some truth there. I will definitely think about the message that Pastor John spoke to us this morning. After chapel, we took a bunch of pictures with the other twins that attended. We then went to the research tent and answered a few surveys in exchange for free stuff. For one survey, we got some lotions. For another survey, we got a $30 Gift Card. After the surveys, we just walked around the festival grounds and talked to some more twins for a few hours. We then got a text from Tina and Trisha to come to the amphitheater for another contest. They were in the lookalike contest, wearing their green summer dresses. Both Jen and I went to the amphitheater to watch the contest. Once again, both Tina and Trisha got first place. After I took their first-place picture, Tina smiled at us again. “How would you like to go bowling with us?” “Yeah!” Trisha agreed. “It’s a lot of fun! Every year on Sunday night, Roseland Lanes opens the entire bowling alley for all of the remaining twins to bowl privately. You’re welcome to come if you want!” I could not pass up the offer, and neither could Jen. We both sadly left the festival grounds one last time and took the golf cart back to the high school. As I saw the festival grounds fading out of view, I frowned. Twins Days Festival was coming to an end. Pretty soon, it would be back to the grind at Philadelphia again. Jen placed her arms on my shoulder. “There there, Jill. There’s always next year. We’re going to register again. I had so much fun here that I want to come every year with you from now on…” That made me feel a little bit better. We got to our red Toyota Camry. Jen drove us to Roseland Lanes, where we met Tina and Trisha there. Leagues were being organized so bowling didn’t start yet. Both Jen and I were put into a league with Tina and Trisha. Bowling started at 7:00 and we played Ninepin and alternated lanes for each frame. After bowling for a couple hours and getting a few strikes, both Jen and I called it a night. We drove back to the Hilton Garden Inn for our very last night. Feeling tired again, I did my nighttime routine in getting ready for bed. For the whole day, I only used three diapers. I put on my fourth diaper with my pajama set and fell asleep. I woke up at 8:00 AM sharp. With the flight back to Philadelphia being at 12:30 PM, both Jen and I had to get back to the airport by 10:00 AM. Both Joey and Gary would be waiting at the airport at 2:00 to pick us up. Within the next hour, both I and my twin sister Jen got ourselves ready. We packed everything after our shower and Jen made sure that all the souvenirs went back in my diaper suitcase. Since the suitcase only had two diapers left (I restocked my purse with five more diapers), it was almost empty. I also traded all my wipes and powders. I also put my Aquaphor back in the checked bag to comply with the TSA guidelines. The creams that we got from the survey would’ve also have been confiscated if they were not in a checked bag. We checked out at around 9:16 AM and left the hotel. We stopped at Sheetz and ordered breakfast to go. We both got a sausage, egg, and cheese, breakfast burrito and some Hashbrownz and ranch dressing. We got water since we would be getting the coffee at the airport. Jen drove to the Cleveland Hopkins International Airport while I ate my breakfast. After she gassed up and dropped off the rental, we took all our luggage out and entered the airport. We checked in our four checked bags again and Jen paid for them with her credit card. After that, Jen took her bag of Sheetz and ate her breakfast while we waited in line at the TSA checkpoint. With it being 20 minutes before we were checked through, that was more than enough time for her to finish her breakfast. I looked at my return flight boarding pass. Our flight was AAL1538. A nonstop flight leaving Cleveland Hopkins International Airport at 12:30 PM and arriving at Philadelphia International Airport at 2:08 PM. Once again, the TSA was no issue. Just one bag through the conveyor belt. After both Jen and I grabbed our backpack purses, we made our way towards our gate. We found our gate, which was C7 this time. At 11:50, we both got our Dunkin’ Coffee. Two large mocha espressos. I only had one small wetting this morning so I knew that I could make it through the flight no problem. Boarding started at 12:10. Both Jen and I got onto the plane. We got 19D and 19F this time, so we were a little bit closer to the bathroom, if Jen needed to use it or if I needed to change my diaper before landing. About two minutes before takeoff, I found the temperature of my coffee cool enough to chug, so I chugged the whole coffee in a few gulps. Jen, on the other hand, took careful sips. About 20 minutes later, I had my first accident in my diaper. The second more intense accident came in another 30 minutes. At that point, I got up and entered the bathroom. I changed into a new diaper and returned to my seat. I was just in time for Jen to get up and use the bathroom. About 45 minutes later, the plane began its descent into Philadelphia and made a perfect touchdown on the runway. About 10 minutes later, it taxied all the way to the passenger boarding bridge. And five minutes later, it was time for Jen and me to get off the plane. I switched my phone off airplane mode and noticed that I had one missed text message from Glytter. As we walked off the plane, I texted her back. She wanted to know if I was on my way home, and I told her that I just arrived in Philadelphia. Both Gary and Joey were waiting for us when we got off the plane. I hugged Gary and we kissed each other on the cheeks. We went over to the baggage claim and we all grabbed a checked luggage bag before leaving the airport. This time, Gary’s Black Lexus LS sedan was parked, and he opened up his trunk for us to put in all of the luggage. With everything loaded, I piled in the back seat with Jen while Joey rode shotgun with Gary. On the way back home, both Jen and I shared our adventures in Twinsburg. All the pictures that we took and all the new friends that we made. Both Gary and Joey only had a little time to explain what they did, which was work and play video games during the weekend. Once in the parking deck, both Gary and Joey helped us carry our luggage all the way back to the apartment. Once inside Apartment 2202 (Home sweet home), both Joey and Gary had to get back to work, since it was a Monday, and both Jen and I needed to rest from the long weekend. I spent the rest of the day unpacking and thinking about tomorrow when I got a phone call. The caller ID read CBS Philadelphia. I could feel my diaper getting warm. I swiped the answer button and put it on speaker. “Hello?” “Is this Jillian Jenners?” “Yes. Hello. How are you doing on this fine afternoon?” “Wonderful. This is Melinda Thompson. I work in the HR Department for CBS Philadelphia. Having reviewed your résumé and all your credentials, we want to set up an interview with you at your earliest convenience. Would you be able to come into the studio tomorrow at 1:00?” My heart skipped a beat. “1:00 works perfect for me. Thank you very much for your time.” “And I in turn want to thank you for your time, Miss Jenners. You have a wonderful afternoon. Bye.” I hung up the phone, and my twin sister screamed in excitement. “Congratulations Jill! You got an interview! You have one day to prepare for it. I hope that you get this job!” A few tears rolled down my eyes. “I hope that I get it too, Jen!” “You’ve wanted this so bad, Jill!” Jen said, almost crying. “I will be praying that you get this job! Now, let’s calm down after the long weekend. We both had a lot of fun…” I spent the rest of the day unpacking everything and getting ready for tomorrow. I announced on my JillianPlays channel on Twitch that today’s stream would be cancelled since I just got back from Twins Days. Glytter already knew this, so giving the news to her wasn’t necessary. It was now bedtime once again. And you all know what that means, my JJ Little Bestie Babies. With my twin sister Jen and I having just returned from Twinsburg, I was totally unaware of what was about to happen. Do you remember how I said that I wanted to use the diapers for convenience and to avoid embarrassment in streams? Well, that happened to backfire in the worst possible way. If you thought that my past embarrassing episodes were bad, just wait until you hear what happens next. You better get a fresh diaper for this one, or there’s going to be a leak. This is going to be the embarrassment to end all embarrassments. I had no idea that it was actually coming to me. Little did I know that my most embarrassing day of my life was just about to happen…

Don't put sheets on the bed, then they will stay dry.

Hey everyone! Rolling right along here, I felt I needed to add this type of chapter in here to flesh out the world a bit more and add some context to the other chapters coming up with the growing bond between Nancy and Emily. This world may still be a little sketchy, but there are still some bright spots and I think I was able to capture the two sides pretty well here. Going forward, I will try to add another chapter tomorrow, but my day is seeming a little packed, even to edit the next already written chapter. So, bonus if I have the time tomorrow, but otherwise, the next chapter should be up sometime Sunday. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 5: A Peaceful If Not Odd Existence Waking up around my usual time, I saw the sun shining just like in one of my drawings, and things only seemed likely today to get better, after all, it was a Saturday. Now, Nancy always liked my drawings, and though they weren’t very good, I still liked making them for her. It was kind of fun and that and a few activities, like those I had planned for today, seemed to make up for some of the more… concerning things recently. Reading was getting to be a little more difficult, but I easily offset this with just sticking to some of the more picture-heavy books. It was a loss, but my new friends at daycare more than made up for it with my newfound free time. I also found myself tripping as I was walking and then stumbling over my words more times than not lately. A few crying fits, some Band-Aids all over my skinned knees, and a hug from one of the daycare staff or Nancy usually helped me through it all. The worst though, was my pull-up. Despite finding a new show I liked with Princess Poppy from her cheery face on them and my love of their pink softness, they represented a point of failure in my current life. Each morning, I woke up all fresh-faced and happy, but my pull-up was sadly damp or even to the point of being soaked. My cheeks would flush with embarrassment, like this morning, and of course, Nancy would soon enter to witness the scene herself. “Oh, dear. Another accident?” she would always ask. I could only tearfully nod, but Nancy did her best to help me clean up and don a fresh new pair for the day. It was horrible, but it revealed one positive in my life that had been growing for some time now. The day had progressed and while Nancy had a few tasks in the morning, she was now happily sitting cross-legged on the other side of the tea tray from me and was finely sipping down some tea from her own cup. Unlike daycare though, Nancy made the extra effort of actually using real tea in our little play times. Teatime with Anna was great and all, but I treasured my times with Nancy since I had rediscovered my love of the event. “Can I have mo’ sugah?” I asked as cutely as I could to Nancy. “And what’s the magic word?” she popped back, staring at me with one eyebrow raised. I sighed, but I knew she was right. We had been working on my manners, but the process was still a little slow. “Please Nancy? Can I have mo’ sugah?” I stared back at her with my large glassy eyes, the same look that Anna used on me before but was now teaching me back at daycare. I didn’t have much these days, but I definitely was perfecting this skill as best I could. Nancy rolled her eyes and sighed in a more joking than cruel or annoyed way. “Oh, my aching heart. Put those eyes away missy, but just stop before I keel over from my heart breaking.” She even gripped her chest. “I’ll get you more sugar… just please… no more.” I giggled and held my teacup over to receive some more sugar in my cup. Bigs like Nancy always liked their tea bitter, but I, like most other Littles here, was developing quite a sweet tooth lately. Beyond some of my more recent… setbacks, it felt like it was becoming my fatal flaw. Still, despite my previously mentioned setbacks, I knew things could be worse. For instance, Tyler was plummeting down faster than me at daycare recently and had already ended up in the Meadows room. After I went there to borrow some wipes from Miss Tully, I was terrified of ending up there myself after seeing him toddle about thickly diapered and all. Miss Tully just stared at me for a while as I retrieved another pack for the Canopy room, and I swore I could feel a shiver down my spine… almost as if she was telling me with her eyes, ‘Soon… you’ll be in here too.’ I nearly shuddered at the notion even now, but just decided to focus back on Nancy. We hadn’t received much together time lately with her super important job, and while a part of me still wanted to go back home, I felt like if I did, I would miss her the most of everyone I had met here. There were a few odd moments where she would give me this look that I swear was some strange cross between happiness and relief, but something always came along and distracted me before I could think about it more. “Penny for your thoughts, Em?” Nancy asked me, now setting her tea down. “Oh! I…” I wasn’t sure what to tell her, as I didn’t want to share any of my recent curiosities with her. I thought I was caught in the middle of an unwinnable situation, but then, I heard a bird chirp outside. ‘Yes! That’s my way out!’ I pointed to the nearby window. “It’s just so pwetty out! Biwds chiwpin’ and sun shinnin’” I mused contentedly, really trying to sell my act of omission to her question. Nancy, it seemed, took the bait. “Oh, you noticed, huh?” I nodded enthusiastically and she just chuckled. “Well then. I guess there’s only one thing to do. How about a walk to the park today, huh? Would you maybe be interested in that?” I looked back the window showing the outside world and saw all the birds flying overhead and the nearly cloudless sky. It was a beautiful late spring day, and everything seemed to pull me outside, but once again as of late, two things scared me out there that I had come to fear more. First, other Bigs beyond those I had already met were really starting to make me nervous. There was more than one occasion where I stuck closer to Nancy and almost wanted to grab her hand. Not necessarily in comfort mind you, but more as to show that I had already been ‘claimed.’ I really wasn’t and I still wanted to go home, but they wouldn’t know that, and I would therefore be safe. Second, though, my pull-up was a constant reminder that I was wearing them for a reason. The last thing I wanted was a near miss like had happened a few other times in the past week. Still, the pull of the outside was stronger than my fears. Besides, I would have Nancy by my side. So, I nodded my head and smiled about as wide as I could. “Can we? Please? Do you weally mean it?” Nancy chuckled and quickly got up. “Of course. Now, put your cup back on the tray and then you try and go potty for me, okay?” I bounced up to my feet and nodded as I set my cup back on the tray as instructed. Nancy just smiled and left with the tray while she left me to do my business. Right then, I was just grateful I wouldn’t have to mount the stairs like I used to when I first came to live with her. See, the house was designed for a Big in mind, so every step was a really big climb for me, and with my pull-ups… my near misses would have been full-blown accidents right on the stairs if not for the tiny potty in the downstairs bathroom that Nancy had set out for me last week. A little humiliating for sure with its babyish designs of diapered princesses, and I always found that odd, but when I had to pee, it might as well have been the greatest gift ever to me. So once again, I popped in the bathroom and only closed the door to a crack, just as a precaution in case something did happen and Nancy needed to help me out. Still, once I dropped my tights, I waddled over to the potty and sat down with my pull-up soon yanked to my feet… thankfully, still dry. “Whew!” I said out loud as a rush of pee soon could be heard splattering on the inside of the plastic surface beneath me. I was a little worried that I initially didn’t think I needed to go so bad, but I still had made it, and that’s what counted in the end around here. “Everything okay in there?” Nancy asked from the kitchen, a few clinking noises following her words as well, likely coming from the dishes she was now washing. “All good! Made it jus’ in time. No accidents today! Pwomise!” I shouted back. “Very good, Emma!” she praised me. I always loved it when she did that lately. I didn’t even think twice about announcing my business to her anymore, as just as long as I got that praise, followed by that wonderful tiny warm feeling all over, I was happy. I had to imagine that it had been a trying week for Nancy. I felt that she was still happy, maybe even happier than when I first met her, but I could tell that between her job and my new… oddities, like the potty for me, she was also more stressed out than ever before. I blamed myself, and I almost considered going back to Mrs. Tatum’s, but Nancy insisted I stay. She called it a ‘burden of a caregiver,’ but I just was more paying attention to the fact that she told me I could still stay with her. Regardless, I soon finished up, used my potty stool to wash my hands while I sang the ‘Happy Birthday’ song and then exited, feeling prouder than ever. Nancy was still packing a few things up though, so I just plopped myself on the couch and started reading another book. It had silly pictures and was always a guarantee to put me in a good mood lately. Finally, Nancy had packed a bag that now hung from her shoulders, and while I hadn’t watched her pack it, now trusting her to do so for me, I almost could guarantee that there was at least a few snacks, a jacket and some drinks for both of us, and maybe even some chalk, coloring books, or a small book in case I got bored yet still didn’t want to go back home. Unfortunately, I also knew there was also likely a change of clothes, some wipes, and a fresh pull-up… just in case. So, resigned but happy, Nancy and I walked out of our house and strolled down the sidewalk to our local park. It was really a beautiful day, but I also had a teensy bit of trouble keeping up with Nancy. Every step she took, I had to take two of my own. It soon became a bit exhausting, and I was momentarily distracted by another Little riding in a stroller. They seemed so happy… so at peace… so… I shook my head. ‘Where did that thought come from about a freakin’ stroller?’ I momentarily paused, completely in disbelief with myself. Nancy noticed. “You okay, Em?” she asked, stopping herself and turning around. “You need to go potty, or…?” I quickly shook my head. “Nope! Just a little sweepy. It’sa lotta walkin’.” Nancy only smiled and waved me forward. “I know, honey, but it’s okay. We’re almost to the park and you can just sit for a minute if you need to, okay?” For some odd reason, as soon as she mentioned the prospect of being close to the park, I felt a sudden surge of energy ripple through me. The park was so close, and we were both now wasting time. So, after nodding, I took off. Nancy just laughed behind me, and despite my exhaustive pace, from her much longer legs, she easily kept up with me. Finally, a block later and out of breath a little, we made it. The park was just like any other I had seen back home, but this one was actually sized for me. While that was worrying on one level, there was a growing part of me that actually became excited to see playground equipment lately. Now, I know many people from back home would probably judge me for that notion. I even judged myself the first time I swung on one of the swings or giggled going down a slide, but everyone back home hadn’t been through what I had. When one’s day is filled with sing-alongs, oddly colored food, and above all, the condescension of everyone taller than you, a playground is just pure freedom. On a beautiful day like today, I made sure I took full advantage of that. While Nancy parked herself on a nearby bench, I went off to find new adventures on the playground. It just so happened the whole thing was built like some giant plastic and metal abstract castle, but to any Little with an ounce of imagination like me, it might as well have had a sign that said, ‘All Princesses Welcome.’ To me, it was perfect. Today, I just happened to be the oldest Little here. The other two that joined my game instead of running off to go play in the sandbox like the other younger Littles had, ‘I mean, gross and scratchy, right? Who needs that?’, were Jimmy and Donny. Both were in daycare with me, but both had been assigned to the Meadows room, though Donny seemingly not far off from joining the even younger Burrows room. I kind of felt bad for the tiny guy, seeing that room as little more than a holding facility for those too young to basically do anything, but he was perfect to be my leading dragon today. “Okay, Donny. You just sit here,” I instructed him, using his subpar walking skills to my advantage, “and jus’ say ‘grrr’ or ‘rawww’ evewy once in a while, o’ when I tell you to, ‘kay?” Donny looked up at me, and due to his thumb firmly pocketed in his mouth, he just giggled and nodded. I wasn’t sure how terrifying he was going to be at being my scary dragon today with his thumb in his mouth like that, but still, he at least seemed happy to play his part. So, I then turned to Jimmy. “Okay, Jimmy. You’s goin’ to be my knight in shinnin’ awmo’. Sound good?” I asked, already knowing what his answer was going to be. Apparently, in his former life, he was quite the ladies’ man and seeing his still-chiseled jaw and deep eyes, it wouldn’t surprise me. Anyone seeing him now though, clearly diapered and on his way down the regression pole, wouldn’t be faulted for doubting that story. For my purposes however, he was perfect to be my brave warrior. As expected, Jimmy nodded quickly. “I’ll save you, mi wadee!” My would-be hero even dropped to one knee and picked up a nearby stick as his trusty sword. I just smiled at how perfect all this was turning out to be. So, all set, we began. I perched myself in the tallest tower, being sure to grip onto the railing up there, at least just to avoid being reminded to do so by Nancy… again. She made a bit of a scene last week and some of the more taunting Littles couldn’t help but laugh at me afterward. Determined to not repeat that mistake again, I held firm with one hand, and then called out to my hero below. “Oh, Siw James!” I cried. Jimmy didn’t turn and then it struck me what was wrong. Unfortunately, I started to notice that some of the younger minded Littles began to forget bits of their old life. It scared me something awful at first, but I just learned to cope with it like most other things around here. Jimmy probably only was ever called ‘Jimmy’ now, so that’s probably all he knew. Sighing a bit, I started again. “Oh, Siw Jimmy!” I cried out again. This time, he turned up to me. “My wadee!” he called back, more squealing than chivalrous, but it was still what I was looking for. Smiling, I looked down and hoped everything would work out today. So, a good time later, Sir Jimmy and I, the Princess Poppy, navigated the hallowed halls of our castle and then the wilds of my surrounding kingdom. Donny just sat in fascination as he watched us, and just to keep things interesting, occasionally, I would point to him to make his noises. To my surprise, he usually took his thumb out of his mouth, even if just temporarily, to say his line. Some spittle and drool fell out onto his shirt and the mulch underneath him half the time, but he still was a very good dragon for our playtime today. Finally, we were getting to the end just as I could tell the day was getting late. I felt a tiny urge to go potty, but seeing we were so close to the end, I just pushed through. Honestly, for a second, I was a little envious of Donny and Jimmy, both of whom clearly used their diapers since we began, but I quickly brushed the thought aside. I was not a baby. “Huwwy, siw Jimmy! The dwagon is this way!” I called out, donning my own trusty sword stick. “Yes, mi wadee! No mo’ bad dwagon aftuh I get dem!” he heroically charged. We both then ran headlong right into the underside of one of the slides that just happened to be where Donny had crawled off to at one point. It made a convincing cave as we approached, and I then pointed to Donny. Once again, he popped his now likely dirty thumb out of his mouth. “Grrr! Rawww!” he shouted. “Oh no! We doomed!” I clung to Jimmy’s arm, and for a second, I thought he almost looked at me the way I would expect any date back home to, but doing a little of improv I guess, Donny yelled out again when I hadn’t even cued him and stopped the moment. “Rawww! Fiah!” He then half-spit, half-gurgled and looked angrier than I had ever seen him. It was hard to understand what he was doing, and it wasn’t part of my plan, but those noises plus ‘fiah’ and being a dragon, to my delight, I just assumed he was spraying fire. Smiling and taking the moment to act a little fearful, I looked back at Jimmy. “We done fo’ Siw Jimmy. He’s spittin’ fire!” Jimmy patted my interlocked arm with his and gave me a tiny little smile. Something told me, that despite his well-used diaper and the large cartoon bird on his shirt, there was still a tiny part of him in there. “Togethuh…” I nodded, smiled, and we both then turned and ran at Donny, both our stick swords pointed right at him. Donny gave one last “Raww!” to us, but Jimmy poked him first. It was just a tiny jab, but I could already tell that Donny’s regressed emotions were getting the better of him. Panicking and not wanting to cause a scene, I adjusted my original ending a bit. I bent down and tried to seem sad. “Oh! Wha’ have we done! This poh lonely cweatuh…” I then had an idea and snapped off one of my purple hair clips. “With dis… potion of healin’… I…” thinking quickly, but knowing my audience, I just made up the first thing that popped into my head. “This will heal you!” I then bopped the hairclip right onto Donny outstretched belly. Nothing happened at first, but to add a little extra magic at the end, I started to tickle his belly. In seconds, he was a fit of giggles. “Da Dwagon is healed! He goo’ now?” Jimmy asked innocently as I reclipped my hair clip. Seeing his wide hopeful eyes, I nodded. “Yes, Siw Jimmy, we saved the dwagon an’ the land. He shall be a good dwagon fwom now on!” We all then hugged over our successful journey, but it seemed right in the nick of time, as both of their caregivers began to call them over. I waved goodbye as each left, and I sighed in happiness, but the moment didn’t last long. Right then, though, my bladder twinged, and my eyes bulged in fear. “Oh sh…!” I looked around and gratefully spotted Nancy. I then ran over to her. “Nancy! Nancy! I need help!” I yelled out in panic. Worrying something was desperately wrong with me, Nancy bolted up and ran over to me. “What? What is it? Did you get hurt? Did those boys hurt you?” She even began checking my hair and then my eyes. I quickly stopped her, my urgent need only growing stronger. “No, Nancy… I have to… have tuh…” I then crossed my legs and started to squirm helplessly. No matter how bad I had to go right then, I just couldn’t get myself to say ‘potty’ out loud. Stupid? Maybe, but it is what it is. Looking down at my obvious potty dance, Nancy’s face became a little calmer, but her eyes took on a look of recognition and urgency. “Oh. I see. Well, come on there!” Without thinking or taking a second to ask, she grabbed my hand, wheeled around to retrieve her backpack, and ran across the large lawn in the park to the restroom at the top of the hill. Gratefully, no one was inside, so Nancy made quick work of undoing my pants and dropping everything before resting me on the large white potty inside, still holding onto me so I wouldn’t fall through the extremely large lid. I saw the door wasn’t even shut for the first few seconds, but I honestly couldn’t care less. I was just so relieved that I had made it, and looking down, hadn’t leaked out into my pull-up. Like me, the real Princess Poppy remained dry and as happy as ever. Beaming with an almost unusual amount of joy and pride, Nancy then helped me off the potty and readjusted everything back into place. Once back out of the stall, she bent down and looked at me face to face. “Emma. I’m just so proud of you. I know everything’s been a bit difficult lately, but you’ve handled it so well. You’ve made me so happy, understand?” Just feeling her radiant praise once again, I only nodded back in relief and happiness. For her part, Nancy seemed positively thrilled, and after a good handwashing, we both then walked back outside. Before we did though, I saw the large me-sized changing tables in the corner of the restroom. Seeing as the potties were Big-sized and the changing tables were my size, a tiny fear managed to slip into my head. Still, once outside, realizing it was getting dark, Nancy and I headed back ho… to her house and then made and ate dinner together. Once all that was done, Nancy and I watched a little TV before bed. While I knew she liked her procedural dramas better, I had recently taken a keen interest in, who would have ever guessed, Princess Poppy. I wasn’t sure what it was, but she just spoke to me in a way that so many other characters on Littles TV didn’t. She didn’t make me feel fuzzy or loopy after… just more like I had learned an important lesson. It might have been sharing or not telling lies, but I still found it endearing in a way that I couldn’t shake. Regardless, I yawned, and chuckling, Nancy turned off the TV and looked back at me. “Okay, missy. I know it was a fun day and all, but I know someone who needs to get their rest. It still felt way too early, but yawning again, I just sleepily nodded. After helping me back up the stairs, Nancy drew me a quick bath and let me do my own business. I kept slipping with the soap, and Nancy offered several times to come in and help me, but I still felt a streak of some kind of independence. Fading perhaps, but it still lingered, so I always said no. Once all that was done though, Nancy waited for me in my room alongside my pajamas and maybe even something behind her back. Usually, she would just help me with my pull-up and pajamas, but this felt different somehow. Worried, I asked, “Is somethin’ wong?” She shook her head and just patted the bed beside her. Nodding slowly, I sat next to her before she sighed. “Emma… this morning, and a lot of other mornings recently in fact… your pull-up… it’s been a little wet.” I looked down at my feet in shame. “I’m sowwy…” My voice even cracked a little. Nancy then pulled my head gently to look at her right in the eyes. “Look at me, sweetie. I want you to know that I would never blame you for something like that. You can’t help it. It’s just something that happens to a lot of Littles here over time. You must have just hit that limit recently.” “Buh so much… it feels so hawd!” I felt I was on the verge of tears, but right before they started to fall, Nancy pulled my towel-only clad body into hers. Oddly, her warmth just kinda felt nice… safe even. I still felt upset, but my tears subsided for the moment at least. “Honey… life can be hard sometimes. It’s how we face it that matters.” She paused for a moment and then smiled down at me. “Think about when you were a princess today.” I nearly recoiled in shock and tiny bit of embarrassment. “You saw that?” Nancy chuckled. “I did, but don’t be embarrassed. It was nice seeing you so happy out there, but at the end, before you came running up to me… I saw you save the dragon. Because Donny was upset, right?” I nodded, marveling at just how well she was getting to know me and my usual outcomes in those scenes. Most of the time, the dragon would be slayed, but since Donny wasn’t, Nancy likely knew there had to be a reason. “Exactly. You changed the outcome based on what you were witnessing,” she began to explain. “Donny was upset, and you reacted. You didn’t just sit there and let him cry… you made an effort to help him… help the situation.” She then reached behind and pulled out something that made me tremble in fear more than anything else in this world. “Like that situation, I think we need to react to this one you’re having at night.” She then moved the diaper closer to me. Nancy though, saw my fear of the crisp white object, and hugged me a little closer. “It’s okay, Emma. It’s just a diaper. It’s not bad. Just a little more protective than your pull-up. If you like it, I can get you some Princess Poppy diapers even, but tiny steps first. Are you willing to try it out for at least one night? Just in case?” I thought about it about as hard as I could right then. At daycare, everyone knew that diapers during the day were a one-way ticket into the Meadows room. As it was, Anna was nearly there and I had comforted her after she wet her dress the other day, but that didn’t mean that I wanted to join her. Wearing them, even at night, felt like such a big leap downward. I still wanted to go home after all. What would my students or even friends say if they ever found out? Still though, the diaper lingered in front of me. It was nearly completely white, save for a few pink and purple swirls along the waistband. Not babyish to my relief, but the whole concept felt babyish enough as it was. Seeing the pail Nancy had set up in my room though, I knew she was right. I was so wet this morning and very uncomfortable after just a moment in bed. If it was just for one night, I felt I could at least try that. So, regretting everything and fearful of what was next, I just nodded. Nancy limply smiled and then gave me a tighter squeeze. “I’m very proud of you, Emma.” We just sat there for a moment, the diaper still calling out, but finally, Nancy spoke back up. “Let me just help you with these, okay?” I could only helplessly nod back to her. Then, as if in my darkest nightmares, despite my reluctance to wear them for one night, I let her ease me to my feet as she then produced a single changing pad and laid it on my bed. It was all covered in tiaras, diamonds, and was of course pink to my small delight, but it still represented something nearly unthinkable to me about a month ago now. “Okay, honey. Just keep breathing and all this will be over in a sec.” Again, I could only nod, as she then removed my towel and gingerly guided me back onto the pad. I had never felt so vulnerable in my life, and I just squeezed my eyes in terror as I began to hear the tell-tale rustling of plastic right above me. In moments, it just got worse, as I felt Nancy’s hand firmly grip my legs and lift them to the ceiling. I had been vulnerable here before. My three spankings in daycare were evident of that, but Nancy… she was different. At first, we just seemed like roommates, but there was a tiny voice in my head that had been growing recently. I thought it was just the usual dynamics of being small in this dimension, but the more I thought, the more I couldn’t deny something I horrifically thought about one day. After all, though I’m sure some situations existed this way, one roommate doesn’t diaper the other. Here, in this dimension however, another title was applied to that person, but I just couldn’t find the power inside of me to even think it right then. Regardless, my thoughts soon shifted to my own situation where Nancy glided a cold wet wipe along my unmentionables, or at least that’s what Anna tried calling them the other day. Feeling so exposed, humiliated, and terrified, I even whimpered a little. “Oh, I’m sorry honey. I know their cold, but just one more moment. We’re almost done.” I just mournfully nodded back, and Nancy kept right on going. As she said though, soon after, I coughed a little as I smelled the horrible scent of baby powder. ‘Oh gosh! Does this make me a baby now?’ I just tried shaking that thought away. It was just for tonight, but as Nancy sealed the front of the impossibly thick foreign diaper up between my legs, my confidence in that notion wavered a little. “Okay, sweetie. You can open your eyes now. It’s all done.” I did and looked down at the near cloud-like garment surrounding my lower half. I was mortified but couldn’t help but poke at the terrible thing. I think I would die on the spot if anyone knew about this, but Nancy just patted my shoulder and helped me up to finish the nightly routine. It was getting late after all. Smiling gently, Nancy then helped me into some pink polka dotted purple pajamas, leaving nothing to the imagination to my shame over what I was wearing underneath, guided me as I brushed my teeth, and then tucked me in for the night. As usual, she left my bedside table light on and a book for me to read. I often would pass out while reading it lately, but I always noticed it was neatly placed back on my nightstand in the morning. I knew at that moment that Nancy would check up on me during the night, and to be honest, it just kind of made me feel safe for some strange reason. Tonight, though, just as Nancy started to leave, I asked her a single question that froze her in her tracks. “Nancy… can you wead to me?” I almost thought I broke her for a moment, but she spun around and looked at me like she did whenever I would mess up something for the first time. Instantly, I felt I had done something wrong. “What did you say to me?” I cowered in fear that I was about to get in trouble, but I just repeated my question. I mean, to be frank, I was having some trouble reading lately, and Nancy was there, so I just had to ask. I’d rather ask than not at least hear a story before bed. “Please don’ be mad, Nancy… jus… can you wead to me?” I offered the book, almost acting like my shield, up to the Big. Nancy took the book in seeming bewilderment, but to my relief, simply grinned down at me. “Of course I will, Emma. Don’t ever be scared to ask me something like that, okay?” I just nodded and smiled back. “Good. Now, scoot over.” I did so and Nancy flipped open to the first page after settling in. “Once upon a time, there was a farmer named George. George lived in village far from anywhere else but dreamed of adventure.” I smiled and feeling a little sleepy, I really didn’t mean to, but my head slowly drifted over and onto Nancy. At first, she seemed startled and paused before flipping the page, but then just leaned her head against mine and continued to read to me. I felt that I could still read the illustrated pages in front of me, but Nancy was here, and she now just seemed happy to do it. I felt like we both won tonight, and in this world, I felt that was never a bad thing. So, I just snuggled into Nancy further, and listened to her as I drifted off, peaceful and happy.

Hey everyone! I did a whole bunch of writing and planning for the next few chapters yesterday and felt that might be a better move than rushing to edit this. I’m hoping this bulk work I did will make it so that I largely won’t have to both write and then later edit chapters in the same day. It’s doable but with some of the longer chapters, it can be a lot. Next, as a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 4: Gripping Onto What’s Fun Only… and Failing Oh boy, do the Bigs around here have some potent food choices. I thought that some noisy toots or having to pee really bad was an issue, but there is nothing quite like feeling hungover for hours after eating whatever caused me to still feel fuzzy when I got home after daycare. Nancy seemed a bit concerned and asked me a bunch of funny questions, but by the next morning, the buzz and fuzziness had largely faded and I just kind of felt at ease. In fact, it was the first time I felt okay about anything in my life here in a long time. Nancy still seemed a bit perplex, but she just kind of went along with it, even going as far as to say the old standard of ‘if you’re happy, I’m happy.’ I could see a look behind her eyes that made me question that statement a little bit, but she was Nancy. She would never lie to me, and I mean, she had started to cut off my crusts lately. Who would cut off your crusts and would still lie to you. No one… that’s who. So, life continued just very much as it had. I noticed a few oddities, just kinda feeling a bit numb and forgetful about certain things, but I was still the oldest Little in the Canopy room and that had to mean something. To be frank, a bonus of being just a teensy bit forgetful was that I was able to read a bunch of the books I had before. I stumbled over a word or two, but no one uses them outside that book, so I didn’t really care. I got the gist of it after all, and I was still a smarty pants around here. To even further prove my maturity, I even upped my rejection of other Littles when they came up to me and asked me to play. Before, I sometimes agreed to play with them if it was in my best interest, such as blending in on days where I thought the staff was suspicious of me, or if someone like Mrs. Carter or Mrs. Gillies was upset at me for one reason or another. I was a good gir… well behaved, and I think that’s all that should have mattered, but still, I wanted my status to stay that way as much as possible. So, for today as an example, this one Little, Anna, came up to me. She was a tiny firecracker of a thing, and from her pull-ups just peaking ever so slightly above her waistband of her jeans today, I knew she wasn’t going to be in this room for much longer. “Pwease pay wiff me?” she begged, her eyes becoming like round saucers in her down-pat begging act. Fortunately, after so many times with Littles here by now, I was practically immune to it. “No, Anna. I said no and I meant it. Go find one of the other Littles. I need to finish my book before snack time today.” “But you pwomised!” she countered. “Iss jus’ some tea pawty dis time. I pwomise!” I scratched my head and tried to remember ever promising such a thing, tea party or otherwise. It was a major downside of my memory being a little problematic, but I just chalked it up to my exhaustion levels. I mean, I was getting super sleepy around the afternoon time lately after all, so it just made sense. Still, I just shook my head fiercely. “Doesn’t matter what I promised you, Anna, if it wasn’t today. Unless you can tell me when, then I must have meant it for the day I said it. Not my fault you didn’t remember or didn’t get to me in time that day.” I felt so triumphant as I foisted the blame back onto Anna. For her part, Anna just stood there for a moment and scratched her own head trying to remember when it was and what exactly I had said. Being the more regressed of the two of us, I knew my word would mean more than hers if it ever came down to it. I couldn’t remember promising anything, but if she couldn’t either, I felt pretty justified and off the hook for this go round. Finally, Anna broke from her head scratching. “I can’t remembuh, but pwease, Emiwy! Pwease!” The poor Little was now even succumbing to clasping her hands together and pleading with me even harder now. It was a rare form to see most Littles get to that level, and I will admit that I cracked a little, but I ultimately still held my resolve. “No, Anna. Not now. I need to find out what happens to my hero James as he climbs the grape vine to find the ogre and save his village. I don’t have time for tea now.” I was being truthful and the book, complete even with pictures, was fascinating to me. Still though, I looked at Anna, and her wide eyes seemed to be on the verge of bursting into tears any moment now. Seeing Mrs. Carter casually glance our way every once in a while, I knew I had to back up and try to resolve this mess before it got even worse. I was already on strike one today for refusing to come to sing-along time this morning. I never had to before and I was more mature than others and I had a book to read and… I shook my head, trying to get back on track, and resumed looking back at the still begging Anna before me. I sighed audibly, still seeing the ever-watchful Mrs. Carter looming nearby. “Fine. How about later? Okay? Will that make you run off and leave me alone right now?” Anna’s pleading stopped, and again, she seemed deep in thought, this time stroking her chin, but soon, a smile appeared across her lips, and she nodded her head enthusiastically. “Yes! I’ll ask you waiter. Tank you Emiwy!” I nodded and made sure she toddled off far away from me. Satisfied she was bugging someone else now, I resumed reading my wonderful book. Of course, I had no intention of playing with her or even having tea later in the day, but she didn’t need to know that. All I knew right then was that I had likely been spared strike two and an immediate march over to the punishment room. My butt was still sore from last week when I went there again for refusing to eat my veggies at lunch time. They were all green and squishy, so refusing, I got a spanking. Unfortunately, since my first encounter with Mrs. Gillies, she had insisted on me participating in more Littles activities than I used to. Stil trying to maintain her custody of me, Nancy didn’t object and actually encouraged me to participate in order to blend in better. I didn’t like her much for that, but I couldn’t deny that she had a tiny bit of a point, so I eventually forgave her. Plus, it didn’t hurt that she offered me a freshly baked cookie later that night as an apology for hurting my feelings earlier. Today, though, to my chagrin, was art day. Now, being the English major I was, I supported the arts program in all their renewed refinery back on Earth. Artists and their grand designs were springing up everywhere back home, but just because one supports something, does not mean they can do it themselves. For me, I could appreciate a good Picasso or Monet any day, but I was near useless when it came to doing anything like that myself. Still, when Mrs. Carter and Miss Valerie told me to do something lately, I tried to do it. “Alright everyone,” Miss Valerie started to announce excitedly, “today is art day!” Many of the Littles around me cheered. I did not. “Yes. Now, some of you will be working with markers or the crayons with me, but others of you will be working with paints with Miss Valerie,” Mrs. Carter pointed out, holding up a bucket of crayons and markers while also gesturing to the easels at the other end of the room near the treehouse structure there. I groaned, but I knew that painting was just downright messy, so I ended up joining Mrs. Carter and a few other Littles with the markers and crayons. “So… do we get a prompt, or…?” I tried to ask without sounding too much like one of the drooling Littles around here. Mrs. Carter only chuckled. “Well, Emily, you can just choose to do something on your own or we have these very easy lined drawings all lined up for anyone who wants them.” I hesitated for a moment, but when I saw most of the Littles wearing pull-ups quickly snatch the lined drawings, I elected for the blank piece of paper instead. “I’ll just stick to using my mind. Shouldn’t be too hard…” Mrs. Carter just smirked at me and walked away to help a few of the other Littles. Time dragged on a bit after that. It took me at least 15 minutes to decide to just draw a house and a nice day to fulfill the needs of the assignment, but I kept messing up the lines. I wanted it to be perfect, and I started grumbling heavily to myself. “Easy there, Em,” Tyler noted from next to me. “It’s just to have fun here. No need in giving yourself a migraine…” I always liked Tyler. He was kind to most everyone, seemed to be a little possessive of things that belonged to him, but he also seemed to be one of the few around here that I could talk to even remotely normally. “Easy for you to say… didn’t you mention being an art major or some such?” Tyler shook his head. “Technically no. Former marketing major but in truth, I almost did consider choosing art. Still… just takes a little skill and some imagination around here.” He then rested his crayon down and held up the piece of artwork he had been working diligently on since I started. “Geez…” My eyes darted around his beautifully crafted image. It was a self-portrait but was entirely down in crayon in ways I had never even considered before. Having only 12 colors to choose from, he nearly effortlessly blended many of them together to create highlights and shadows everywhere. “That’s… it’s…” “So lovely!” Mrs. Carter rudely interjected from behind us. “You should be very proud of that, Tyler. I think we should stick that out front to show off.” Her eyes then darted over to my sorry excuse of a drawing. “And Emily… that’s a very good effort. I’m sure Nancy will just love it. Is that your house back on Earth, sweetie?” I could feel the condescension and her tone used exclusively for younger Littles just dripping off each of her words. I nodded, and seemingly satisfied, Mrs. Carter walked off. Feeling my emotions suddenly surge as they oddly had been recently, I quickly ripped up my paper. “Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” “Hey!” Tyler tried to yell out to stop me, but it was too late. He looked a little crestfallen as he stared back at me. “That was really good, Em. You should have kept that…” I just angrily hmphed and folded my arms. Tyler seemed a little hurt, but I didn’t realize someone else had been watching and listening in. “It’s okay, Tyler,” Miss Valerie said warmly from behind us. “You have a wonderful piece of artwork, and I think Emily here just needs something different today.” She then held out her hand to my crossed arms and smiled at me patiently. “Come on, Emily. Let’s see if painting is more your style today.” Seeing her invitation more as a command than a request, I sighed and took her hand. “Bye Tyler… I really did like your piece…” He smiled back at me and waved goodbye. “Thank you, Em. Just have fun today, okay?” I didn’t have time to respond back as Miss Valerie wasted no time in dressing me in a large billowing smock that covered all my clothing from my neck down to my feet. Seemingly happy with her work, Miss Valerie stood back and smiled. “Wonderful. Washable and even edible paint, but no sense in getting it on your clothes needlessly, huh?” I just nodded and wanted to get this portion of my day over with. Miss Valerie kept smiling and brought me to a now empty sheet of paper hoisted up on an easel. It seemed even more daunting to me than my previous sheet with the markers I was using, but Miss Valerie just pushed the paints and brushes right up to me. “Here you go, honey. As Tyler said, just have fun!” With that, she then left me, but I still felt stumped. I had already tried and personally felt like I had failed with my rendition of a house, so I had no earthly idea what to paint now. Ten minutes passed and I noticed that many of the Littles had begun to disperse to go get cleaned up with some of the volunteers today. Groaning over a bunch of college-aged and high schoolers seeing me struggle with something like painting, just got me all twisted inside. Before I resigned in abject failure though, Miss Valerie came back up to me and sighed. “Still no painting, huh?” I shook my head sadly. She then patted my shoulder. “Here. Let’s try something else.” She then grabbed a brush and splattered a few dollops of paint on the paper plate in front of me. “Okay, I won’t subject you to finger painting today, but we can at least make something for you to take home to Nancy today.” “But I don’t think I can do it, Miss Valerie!” I accidentally whined back. I meant it more as a protest, but once again, my cloudy emotions seemed to be taking over. “I’m terrible at art! Always have been!” “I don’t think that’s true, but even if you think it is, that’s okay, dear. I have something else in mind anyways.” She then grabbed something from her pocket and stretched it out. “Alright. Eyes closed, but just in case you want to peak…” Without so much as another word, she wrapped the long cloth around my eyes. “But I can’t see!” I protested, but it was no use. In seconds, everything was either shades of black or there were just some slips of light coming from underneath the cloth, but it was just of the floor and my feet… nowhere near close to the sheet in front of me. Miss Valerie chuckled. “That’s okay, sweetie. Right now, we’re just going to have fun.” And with that, she took a hold of both my arms and held them out before me, like I was some half-dead mummy or Frankenstein’s monster. Before I had a chance to protest, Miss Valerie cut me off. “Now, before you complain, I just want to do this one thing. I’ll hold you up and decide the color, but you just move your arms with what feels best, okay?” Seeming trapped and helpless, I felt couldn’t do anything but nod. “Perfect! Alright… here we go!” Miss Valerie then thrusted me downward and up. It felt strange to be controlled and yet not in control as well. My brush definitely hit the canvas, but not being able to see anything, I just moved about between long strokes and sheer wildness. I could quickly feel splatters of paint coating my hands and arc out to my chest. I hesitated. “Keep going, Emily! You’re doing really great. Just tell me when you want to switch colors.” “Switch!” I belted out immediately. I then dove down and popped back up moments later. From the splashing of the water on my hands, I knew I was making a mess, but Miss Valerie didn’t seem to care. She even started making race car noises behind me and started to turn the whole thing into a game. I would shout, “Switch!” and she wound dunk me down again and then back up all while humming and grunting out like we were in some car race or on a rollercoaster. “Vroom! Eeek! Dunka dunka dunka! Vroom! Vroom!” It was so silly… she was so silly, but it didn’t take long of the utter ridiculousness for me to begin to crack a smile as well. Being tossed around, practically smeared in paint most likely, and just waving about like some madwoman, it was hard not to. Finally, Miss Valerie halted me into position. “Alright, I think that’s good. Just stay still and let me help you out here.” I did as I was instructed, and the blindfold was quickly removed after my brushes were taken from my hands. Before me, the whole area, wisely protected by plastic sheeting and newspapers, was covered in splashes of paint, nearly too numerous to list, but when I stared at the canvas, it wasn’t anything, but it was also something. I wasn’t sure what, but I just marveled at the array of colors used and I almost couldn’t believe that had sparked from Miss Valerie’s and I’s chaotic dance of sorts. “We did that?” Miss Valeria chuckled as she began to use a wet wipe to clean the bulk of my hands. “No, sweetie… you did that. I just helped you carry the load for a bit. I took away all your judgement and worry over what you were doing. And, if I’m not mistaken from a few of the giggles I heard you make out, I think you had a good time as well. Am I right?” It was hard to swallow all that at once, because she was essentially insinuating that I just let go of everything here, and while that worked for the art world a lot of times, I also had to read between the lines as well. I couldn’t just outright tell her that I wouldn’t give into their infantile designs for me, but I also had to say something. So, I just kind of looked down and nervously bit my lip and rubbed my shoes together. “I guess…” Miss Valerie smiled, and I was grateful she didn’t push the matter further. “Okay. I got most of that paint off, but I think you need some sink time as well. So, off to the potty room with you. Scoot!” Not needing to be told twice, I marched into the bathroom with Miss Valerie. I didn’t think anything of it at first, but after thoroughly washing my hands off with most of the rest of the paint, Miss Valerie just kind of stopped in front of the door as I started to walk out. “Forgetting something?” I tried to rack my brain to think of anything she could be talking about, but I just came up empty. “No… I don’t think so?” Miss Valerie sighed. “Hmmm… well, if you need me to remind you… the potty, Emily… do you need to go potty?” Her hand gestured toward the diminutive stall I had been using so far in there. Seeing so many around here demoted to pull-ups I just had to pause for a moment, and really think if I did or not. I didn’t want to have any slip-ups and earn myself another strike, but I didn’t feel the need at all. “No, Miss Valerie. I don’t have to go…” Miss Valerie seemed a bit put off by that notion, but ultimately just accepted it and let me rejoin the others. Once the art supplies had been cleaned up and the artwork placed on drying racks, the rest of the staff got lunch prepared. It was pretty standard fare, but I guess there was a surge of us in the Canopy room recently, as they even brought in Miss Mindy from the Meadows room to supervise the event. Several Littles were scared, knowing exactly what types of Littles she looked over, but her warm smile and buoyant personality convinced most of them that she was only here to help today. I was less convinced. Still, after lunch was over, everyone mulled about their day. Another round to the potties for most of the Littles, but I just kept reading my book about James and the ogre. It was just getting to the good part when Miss Mindy walked over to me. “Enjoying your book, honey?” I stared up at the tall curly redhead, but I think her nice smile threw me off a little. “Oh yes. I just got to the part where James is taking the magical flute from the treasure room!” Her eyes beamed down at me, and she even lowered her face to mine a little. She seemed less threatening closer to the ground with me, but I could still tell something was cooking behind her eyes. “That’s wonderful, Emily.” She then paused and looked at the rest of me. “Emily… do you need to go potty?” I probably should have been expecting that type of question considering that almost every Little in here just went or had an accident of some sort, but I honestly didn’t feel the need to go. So, trying to act as casually as I could about it, I shook my head. “Nope! I’m all good. Thanks for asking!” Trying to shuffle her away, I smiled widely and then dove back into my book. My ploy didn’t work though as Miss Mindy pulled down my book only seconds later so that I now faced her again. “Emily… I think you do need to go. Miss Valerie says you didn’t go before lunch, so you’re either not drinking enough, or you’re lying to one or both of us now.” I was starting to feel a little defensive right then, but I still tried to remain calm. It was a classic Littles trap, but I didn’t realize it at the time. I just wanted to read my book to see how it would end. Nothing sinister or anything like that, and besides, I really didn’t have to go. Maybe in an hour, but not then. “I’m not lying,” I tried to defend myself. “Honest…” Miss Mindy still didn’t seem satisfied with my answer, hesitated for a moment, and then yanked my book away from me. “Hey!” Miss Mindy held the book just out of my reach, and I tried to claw it back. “Tsk, tsk,” was about all she said back to me, and frankly it just kind of got me more annoyed and more desperate to just go on with my day and finish the book. I was so near the end, but I couldn’t remember it from when I read it before. So, I persisted. Now, I just want to go on record and say that the Littles guide I read might honestly be a ploy for Littles to regress themselves. It practically hints at just submitting to Bigs by the end, but as I was finding out, it was also leaving out huge bits of useful information. First, not all Big advice is bad, seeing as if I had listened to even a single one of them, I might have even been home by now. Second, a Little should always carry their passport with them, even beneath their clothing. It’s your lifeline and your bags can always be stolen… your bra or even underwear, possibly, but not so easily. Third and finally by now, I felt it should have listed something about moving your hands fast back toward a Big. It might have just been some playful shoving or trying to get something just out of your reach, but it just took a second for something to go terribly wrong. And something did go wrong… Trying to snatch my book back, Miss Mindy almost seemed to be toying with me by now. Several Littles looked on in horror at the scene unfolding before them, yet no other Big was there to put a stop to it. If they had, I might not have realized that Miss Mind suddenly arced back her hand just a little out of my reach, or that just under the book was Miss Mindy’s face. It took only a split second, but reaching out further, I lost my balance, and my tiny palm came crashing down and smacked Miss Mindy right in the face. A ghastly shock echoed throughout the room. Everything at once felt like it had stopped. Miss Mindy seemed truly unhurt but seemed definitely perplexed over what had just happened with her face and my hand. For my part, I nearly froze as I stared back at my hand like it had somehow betrayed me. I knew it was just my fault, but I knew whatever happened next wasn’t going to be good. So, even for a moment, it felt nice to blame someone or something else other than my own fault. Regardless, Miss Mindy’s expression soon grew dark, and she bolted up. Her full height stood strained above me and I nearly whimpered at the realization of what was now likely to happen. I was in trouble for sure, but I just didn’t know how much yet. “Emily Breckenridge!” she thundered. ‘Shoot.’ I could only look back up at her in fear. “I guess someone decided to be extra naughty today. Pity…” It was less than I was expecting, yet I still felt certain I would be visiting the back cutesy dungeon I had twice before. So, it wasn’t exactly a shock when she hoisted me up into the air and then under the crook of her arm. Then, however, she spoke, and my blood froze and then boiled. “I guess I was too hopeful to expect a Little like yourself to be ready for the potty just quite yet. Shame… Oh well!” she said so nonchalantly. “Afraid the training panties just aren’t going to cut it!” I think I nearly wet myself right there. I was a good Little, but I really just didn’t need to go. Plus, I had only just hit her by accident. Surely that had to mean something, right? But the Littles parting right down the middle to allow Miss Mindy to pass through outside the room seemed to prove me dead wrong. Unfortunately, unlike the back room I was expecting, she exited the Canopy room quickly and entered the one place I really didn’t want to be: Mrs. Gillies’ front office. To my horror, Mrs. Gillies was already there waiting for us. She wheeled around in her chair, and I could see a cabinet full of monitors that she promptly closed. “I already know, Mindy.” She sighed and looked right at me. “Anything to say for yourself missy?” I gulped but I knew this could be my one hope at redemption. I meekly nodded and looked up at my captor and would-be punisher. “Please Miss Mindy. It was just an accident. I didn’t mean to hit you. I’m really, really sorry!” I tried my best to look my most pitiful and while I thought I was definitely getting better at it; I don’t think it was quite where it needed to be to be effective. Miss Mindy sighed and shook her head. Before she spoke a word, I knew my fate was already sealed. “Oh well. I know you’re already sorry about that, Emily. I was hoping you were going to say something else, but,” she then looked back over at Mrs. Gillies, “with your permission, I think the next bit should do well today?” I had no idea what she was talking about, but Mrs. Gillies folded her fingers, leaned back in the chair, and then sighed. “I really hate to do it, but I will trust your judgement in this matter.” With that, Miss Mindy just nodded and hauled me out of the office. Realizing my fate was likely sealed, but not wanting a spanking, I tried for plan B and fought back as much as I could. I was already in loads of trouble by now, so it just felt like my next logical choice. “Let me go! Let me go!” I began to wiggle as if someone had just poured ice down my panties. Now, ‘quit while you’re ahead’ is a useful phrase that I feel every Little should cherish and memorize no matter what their circumstances in this dimension. In retrospect, thrashing about was not the move to make right then, as when we passed by the front desk, Miss Mindy grabbed a ruler and gave me three swats to my exposed rear. “You! Will not! Kick me!” I barely felt the pain, but I also felt I hadn’t done anything wrong on purpose. It was so unfair, and the tiny spanking only furthered my emotions as they began to go haywire. I wanted to listen to her… I really did, but my mouth and body had other ideas. “No! No! Let me go! I didn’t do anything wrong!” “Unbelievable…” Miss Mindy just shook her head. “Guess we need to make pit stop first. She then resumed her walking and to my horror, she entered the Canopy room. Almost every Little just stared at me in horror, but Miss Mindy just ignored them and went over to my cubby and to the container at the top that contained my mandatory change of clothes. “Hmmm… these seem a bit inappropriate today…” Miss Mindy then dumped my spare training panties out and instead replaced them with a pair of pink prince pull-ups. Remembering what she had said earlier about not being ready for training panties, I was too shocked to say anything. “Perfect! These should do nicely. Now, just one more stop.” Miss Mindy then took me down the hallway outside, and unfortunately, right into the Meadows room. Fearful that everything was falling down around me now, I popped out of my stupor and began to thrash around more. Despite my ruckus, Miss Mindy’s grip just held firm. “No! No! You can’t do this to me! I want my panties back, you stupid cow!” I cursed. I had no idea where those words were coming from, but I knew they were bad in so many ways for me, particularly when a few Littles covered up their ears inside the room. “Tsk, tsk…,” Miss Mindy chided me, like I was the bratty young child I guess I was now looking like as I still fought her every step she took through the room. I swear I saw that old, ugly dog again, but I was too preoccupied by all the smells and the awaiting rear door of the room and the spanking I knew was on the other side. “Such a shame. You were such a good girl for us since you started coming to daycare, little miss. I guess we were giving you just too much slack in the Canopy room. No worries… we know just how to handle your type…” Miss Mindy continued, trying to reposition me better as I still wildly kicked around. I didn’t hear her though. I was in my own little world by then. “I want out now!” I just continued to wail, likely to my own further punishment later. “Wait until Nancy hears about this! She’ll have your job! Get off me now, you stupid bi…!” Before I had a chance to say anything further, Miss Mindy popped me on the butt again, this time with her freehand. Then, sighing, Miss Mindy just continued and nodded at the most notable daycare worker beyond herself working in this room. “Evening, Miss Tully. Just showing Em here her likely future…” Miss Tully just looked over to me, smiled, and gave me a little wave. Miss Mindy’s words and Miss Tully’s welcoming wave were a shock to my system, but before I had a chance to even register them, Miss Mindy just continued to carry me away and out the back door of the room. Soon, we were in the cutesy dungeon once more and I was lying back down on the bench with my panties and jeans around my ankles. Miss Mindy elected the long wooden paddle and lined up her shot from behind. I braced for the impact, but she then just sighed instead. “You know… it didn’t have to be this way. If you just behaved and listened, all this could have been avoided.” She heavily sighed again. “I just wanted you to go potty. Even just to try and then I would have known you weren’t lying. I think you just get yourself way too scrambled and overthink everything around here, and from what Miss Valerie told me, I don’t think I’m the only one who thinks so either. I guess we’ll soon fix that though…” My mind spun at what she had just said, but one swift smack by the paddle to my poor butt, sent those thoughts spiraling away. Today, I wasn’t even sure how many spanks I would be receiving, but I lost count after 20. After… uh, the numbers seemed fuzzy, but I just focused on the pain erupting from behind me. By the end, I was a complete mess, and unlike Miss Valerie, Miss Mindy immediately took me away and, to my everlasting sadness, to the back room once more. “Oh, hello again, Emily,” Bee said, smiling as Miss Mindy escorted me into the room and set me down on the restraining large armchair again. I didn’t respond and she stared back at Miss Mindy. “Everything okay? She’s not broken, is she? You know that messes with and can even invalidate my results.” Miss Mindy groaned and rolled her eyes. I remained silent and submissive to whatever their whims were. I didn’t care anymore. I just didn’t want another spanking. “Yes, Bee. I remember, but this little mischief maker smacked me in the face, threw a temper tantrum all throughout two classrooms, and refused to go potty.” It was an exaggeration, but I knew better than to correct her. “Oh my!” Bee then looked back down at me. “Little troublemaker indeed. Guess the first time didn’t stick. Can’t say I’m surprised with their lot though…” Miss Mindy nodded and backed away. “You got this? I think Tulia is going to need my help pretty soon back in the Meadows room.” In a second, the restraints clunked over my wrists and Bee smiled back. “Not anymore. Go, go. Little Emma and I are going to have a little fun, aren’t we?” she asked, now looking back at me. I still didn’t respond. “Oh. I think someone’s shy…” her voice was barely above a whisper like it was some secret or with the possibility of me being offended. I knew it was just a joke at my expense though. Miss Mindy smirked and then left. Oddly, I felt this place seemed familiar, as I really just knew of ‘a backroom,’ but I just couldn’t quite place it. Just as I was trying to figure out why it seemed so familiar, Bee poked a needle right into my arm. “Ow!” I could quickly feel the tears swim to my eyes and a warmth spread throughout my body. “That hurt!” “Awww…” Bee mocked. “Just a little prick, but I know just what will pick you right up.” She then wheeled away in her chair briefly and came back with a big scary-looking machine. “Okay, now just smile for the camera, Emma!” It didn’t look like a camera, but I stared back into the big screen getting into place before me. At first, I thought it was nothing but a likely broken, black screen, but soon, it popped on and an array of colors began to flood my eyes. “So… pwetty…” “That’s right…” Bee said, smiling just out of the corner of my eye. “Just look at the pretty images and relax, Emma. Just relax… that’s it… godd girl...” I quickly felt myself relaxing. Everything began to buzz and feel fuzzy. The pictures were funny. ‘Is that Nancy? Ooh! Bunny! Oh… I feel so… relaxed… happy… peacefuwl…’ I swore I felt a warm sensation in my panties, but the feeling soon went away. I was too sleepy to care anyways… The colors made me feel so many things. I didn’t want to close my eyes. I didn’t matter though. What I wanted didn’t matter. I was just happy… I was calm… relaxed… I was sooo sleepy… * * * I felt an odd tugging sensation and cold underneath my feet. My eyes slowly opened and then popped open all at once after seeing what initially greeted them. “Wha…?” “Oh good, sweetie,” Miss Valerie smiled up at me as she finished removing my training panties. “You’re finally awake.” Her face then turned a little sorrowful. “Sorry honey, but you kind of had an accident after you nodded off. It’s okay, but I think your training panties just aren’t doing the trick anymore.” I was so confused and my tushy really hurt. I tried to look for answers… I didn’t like being confused, but that’s when I found my pants and training panties off to the side… wet. “Oh no!” “Shhh, shhh,” Miss Valerie tried to calm me. “It’s okay. Really, Emma. It’s just a little accident. I just need to clean you up a little bit and everything is going to be just fine. I promise, okay?” “’kay…” was about all I could say right then in my dejected and confused state. I felt adrift and more than a little upset, but Miss Valerie said it would be okay, so I just trusted that she knew best. I looked down and I shivered as the wipes rounded my skin and wiped me clean. It was a little uncomfortable, but I was getting all clean again from my little accident. In the end, that’s what mattered. ‘I hate feelin’ all icky! Yuck!’ “Okay. Much better,” Miss Valerie said after tossing the last wipe away a few moments later. She then reached over and ruffled out something pink and kind of poofy. “Now. Just be a good girl for me and step right in. In fact, it’s just like you did with your training panties, okay?” I nodded and braced myself on her shoulder and then placed both my legs into the garment as she told me to. Miss Valerie then slid them up my legs and into place. They felt a little bulky and I worried that everyone was going to see and make fun of me, but I did like the princess on the front. She seemed so familiar, but I just wasn’t sure why. Regardless, I liked her and even the pink. I made feel all pretty… ‘Like the princess!’ Miss Valerie looked at me weirdly for a moment, and I felt like such a poofy head for forgetting the most obvious thing. “Sowwy, Miss Valawee… thank you so much. Dey so pwetty!” I showed my new pull-up off proudly to her. Miss Valerie only smiled back and ruffled my hair. “I’m so very glad, Emma. You were a very good girl.” She then bent over and grabbed something from the floor. “Now, let’s get these leggings on you so you can go back out and play.” I just nodded and once again, braced against her as she slid up my purple leggings. A little self-conscious over the slight bulkiness my leggings showed off with my new underwear, I reentered the Canopy room slowly. I saw a bunch of Littles looking at me and I squirmed in place thinking they were all judging me. Fortunately, it seemed I still had one friend here. “Emma! Emma!” Anna called out to me, running over. “Taywo goh in twoubuh!” I gasped in sadness and shock. “Buh’ he was so good. His awt was awesome and supah cool!” “Yeah!” my friend agreed. ‘She was my friend, right?’ “Buh someone stohl da paint he was usin’. Big fight an’ awl!” I gasped and we continued to chat for a little while longer. I hoped to see Tyler back here so I could offer him my support and a great big hug, but unfortunately, after some time, I still didn’t see him. Once again though, Anna was there for me. “Emma?” I looked back up at my friend. “Yeah?” “You wanna pway wiff me?” she asked nervously. I worried she didn’t want to be with me anymore, but when I saw she looked like she was the one who was going to get rejected, I just nodded my head really, really quickly. “Uh huh!” “Yay!” she celebrated. “How ‘bou’ some tea?” I smiled and nodded enthusiastically again. I knew I would have to leave soon, and while that meant that Nancy was coming here to pick me up… ‘Oooh! I can’t wait to see her!’ I then quickly thought of the cool new painting I had made today and even wanted to show off my new pull-ups! I mean, they were pink, and the princess was pink. ‘Did that make me a princess?’ I smiled but I quickly wondered how I got into thinking I was a princess in the first place. My thoughts felt like they had all just gone through a mixer. ‘Were they always so hard to wade through? Wait a sec… wasn’t I thinking something else before the princess thing and the pink bit?’ I stopped and tried to remember. ‘Ugh!’ I realized I had gotten off topic, but after focusing as hard as I could while Anna went to get the tea set from nearby, I remembered it! What I was thinking was that even though Nancy would be here soon, I was glad for friends like Anna. In an exciting and yet sometimes scary place like daycare here, making or bonding with a new friend was the best thing in the world.

Hey everyone! Blasted small emergencies and last-minute events I couldn’t get out of cropped up and delayed me releasing this chapter last night. I’m hoping things will be a little more settled and I can just start popping these off daily, as it actually is pretty fun to write. As a reminder, I’m now polling between two stories to figure out what I should write next. The two choices are listed out in chapter 2, so be sure to check them out and let me know. As I will announce my winner in my last chapter, that would be the deadline for you to make your opinion known. As usual, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 3: Smash and Spank and a Surprise My best laid plans actually succeeded for once in this dimension, and in no time flat, everyone at the foster home was informed that I was going to be leaving to live with Nancy by the end of the week. Mrs. Tatum and the Littles were of course devastated, and while I wanted to tell them the truth about why, Kathy’s looming presence deterred me significantly. Unfortunately, Kathy only doubled down on her efforts to humiliate me in my time left, and I almost wet my training panties one day after she held me back from using the potty to finish coloring her a picture. In the end though, Nancy swung by the next day and rescued me back to her own home. Like so many others around here, the home was massive by my standards but according to Nancy, it was just a ‘decently sized place.’ She could have afforded something larger, but she preferred to use her money wisely and she said she didn’t need much. She hinted at that possibly changing, but I was so enamored with my new room free from Kathy that I didn’t really pay that much attention to what she was saying in that particular instance. So, the next week rolled on and I was enrolled in the local daycare for when Nancy was at work. It was actually a pretty interesting place at first and I had been assigned to the Canopy room while I was staying there. To me, it felt like some novelty party room themed to the jungle or the tops of trees, but it was at least pleasant enough to get me through the day. To my chagrin, it meant that I was placed with some already regressed Littles though, but I soon found the book nook in the room and was happy to just sit back and do some reading. Back at home though, things were even better. Living with Nancy, despite the fact that we were a Little and Big living together, she almost went out of her way to accommodate me almost like I was just her roommate. I guess I essentially was, but both of us always kept in mind that sort of boundary ceased to exist beyond the four walls and when the new LPS agent came to inspect the house at the start of my second week here. “Okay, let’s see… training panties, child-proof locks and safety covers over outlets, no choking hazards, nothing sharp or toxic if ingested…” Nancy was running down the list of things she knew the agent was going to check for and that could be a problem that would result in her paying a fine most likely and me being sent back to the foster home. I still wasn’t a big fan of wearing training panties still, but Nancy had demonstrated two things to me since I had arrived here that made me at least tolerate them better than I had before. First, normal underwear my size was rare and half the pairs we found, we discovered actually had regression properties of some kind laced within the fabric, so the risk was just too great to chance it. Second, and more important though, due to the society’s notorious traps for regressing Littles and laws stipulating wet pants without protection could lead to severe punishment, training panties at least offered somewhat of an out… just in case. So, wanting to contribute a little today, I did my own part and made sure that I was in a calm state of mind to answer the questions I knew were coming from the LPS agent. I had even tidied up my room and ensured with Nancy that my sheets reflected a more juvenile style than I might have been used to. We had selected them together, and despite the fact that princess motifs on the bedspread weren’t ideal, I knew it could be much worse. Then, Nancy and I froze as we heard the doorbell ring. Nancy breathed in and exhaled loudly. “Okay, Emily. Just take one step at a time and don’t panic. Just as we rehearsed, okay?” I nodded silently and braced for the agent’s entrance myself. Nancy and I had been worried about our little balancing scheme between me keeping my freedom within the house and being a Little outside of it. Today, those two worlds would be colliding, but I knew that if we were able to pass this inspection, things would be much smoother in the future. Nancy then opened the door with all her might and sported a wide, friendly smile. “Hello there! Come on in!” The monochromatically dressed agent walked in and her eyes immediately began to dart around the room. She then pulled out her badge and flipped it open so we could see the shiny ID and metal badge within. “Agent Vanessa Dawson. LPS. I’m here to conduct a Little and caregiver inspection today. Do you consent to my search of your house?” I swear she must have had Botox or something because her whole face, beyond her mouth hadn’t moved so much as an inch in that entire time she was talking. Nancy, likely sensing the seriousness of the new agent, nodded resolutely. “I consent.” The agent nodded back herself and popped open her tablet to a page where Nancy would need to sign. After she did, it was then my turn and I handed the heavy tablet back to Agent Dawson with Nancy’s help once I scrawled my own signature at the bottom of the form. Agent Dawson reviewed the file and looked over it carefully before moving her screen to a different page. She then stared back up with her still undiscerning face. “Now that’s all settled, I will begin my investigation. You may join me if you wish, but absolutely no talking when we first enter a room. You may once I give you the signal to do so.” She then looked directly at me. “That goes for you too. So, do you both understand?” We both nodded and while Nancy went off with her during the inspection, I elected to stay downstairs and read a few books Nancy had purchased for me. A lot of them were above the usual Little’s reading level, but we had hidden those away for today. Instead, I perused through a few of the others directed more towards Big children. Simple still, but there was at least more than a single basic sentence on each page. I soon became engrossed in the book of the tiny beaver, but not thirty minutes later, Nancy and Agent Dawson returned from the inspection upstairs. “Oh yes, we have a nighttime routine,” Nancy continued. “Most of the times it’s the usual fair, but I’ve also included reading to her at night as well.” Both then noticed me with the open book in my lap. “As you can see, she’s quite the reader.” “I see… very interesting…” was about all Agent Dawson said then or any of the other times I overheard her respond to something that Nancy had just said. I could feel the desperation practically ooze off Nancy that all this would go well and a search of Agent Dawson’s facial features to confirm that. To her growing annoyance though, I could tell she saw that the agent wasn’t going to break for her today. The two walked around a little more and Agent Dawson even made some embarrassing comments about the potty chair that Nancy had set up for me in the downstairs bathroom. It was purple and decorated with fairies, but I honestly didn’t mind this one. I suppose it might have had something to do with the fact that I had few other options around here or wasn’t forced to use it like with Kathy, but it was more likely the fact that I could actually sit on it without help as compared to a normal-sized Big toilet, and that Nancy wouldn’t watch me like Kathy had started to do in the end. The two kept talking, but finally came back into the room where both then looked at me. Agent Dawson spoke first. “Emily. I need to ask you some questions and then I should be on my way, okay?” “It will be okay, Emily,” Nancy reassured me. So, feeling the tiny confidence that Nancy had instilled in me, I nodded. Agent Dawson then smiled and sat in front of me, and Nancy went outside to wait on the back porch as per protocol. “Now then…” Agent Dawson reviewed her notes a little more. “Let’s just get to these. No pressure whatever your answer, but just tell me the truth, understand?” I nodded. “Good. First, are you fed enough here?” The question was straight forward, but I had to think about it for a moment. “Uh, I think so. Definitely more than I was at the foster home though.” Agent Dawson and scribbled out some notes. “Are you satisfied in your current living situation?” The question was a little harder, but I also knew what I should say, or at least not say. Any hesitation or bumbling around my answer could be viewed as either me lying to her or trying to cover up something else more nefarious. So, I answered about as quickly as my mind could register the question. “Yes. It’s very nice here compared to the foster home.” Again, Agent Dawson nodded and took some more notes. “Are you abused?” I knew this question was coming and I found out later was the main reason that the Little and potential caregiver had to be separated during the questionnaire portion of the inspection. Knowing this question was the biggie of the lot, I responded right away once again. “Absolutely not. Quite the opposite with Nancy actually.” I swore I could see the tiniest hint of a satisfied smirk appear on Agent’s Dawson’s face, but she nodded and only continued to write her own notes down. “Okay, lastly, do you have a favorite thing to do here?” “Hmmm…” I felt this question was a little more to try and end on a positive note with Littles, just to associate the agent with pleasant associations with their visits, instead of the dread that both Nancy and I had been feeling beforehand. In this case, though, what should have been an easy question was actually a little hard. I wanted to say being free to do what I want and not dictated to like I was a mentally regressed Little, but that would have broken everything that Nancy and I were trying to accomplish here with my secretive double life. It wasn’t exactly illegal to be a mentally older Little, but it may have been frowned on by some and could just lead to more issues down the road. So, instead, I just answered the most obvious way I could. “I like being able to read here. It let’s my mind wander and my imagination feel free.” I wasn’t sure if that was completely the answer that Agent Dawson was looking for from the expression on her face afterward, but it had the benefit of being both true and an answer I knew she really couldn’t object to. Then, after scribbling her last note, we both stood up. Nancy saw from outside and re-entered. “So, did everything go well?” Agent Dawson sighed, and I think both Nancy and I held our breaths in tense nervousness. “I think so. I’ll need to file all this paperwork officially, but I can say that there at least weren’t any red flags I noticed today.” Both Nancy and I exhaled loudly. “I’m very glad to hear that,” Nancy said finally. She and Agent Dawson talked a little bit more, but I knew I needed to take the time and get ready for daycare. Nancy and I had elected for an early morning inspection today to interfere the least amount possible with Nancy’s job. Apparently, she still had to miss her morning meeting, but we could both continue with our days as if nothing much had happened if we still left within the next 15 minutes. For Nancy, that meant more board meetings and pitch formations for future projects of her company. For me, that meant Little Friends Daycare. As Nancy finally ended her conversation with Agent Dawson and we both then loaded into the car, I couldn’t help but feel a little apprehensive of what today could hold for me. I can fully admit to the fact that I might have jumped into Nancy’s embrace a little too quickly, but it was to get away from Kathy. I thought she was the worst it could get for a Little here and eventually lead me to just some thumb-sucking drooler of a Little without a hope in ever going back home. I was wrong. At daycare, while the rainbow façade was pleasant and the staff were all kind and caring in their own ways, I hadn’t anticipated the interaction with other Littles that I would face. As the daycare was fully staffed and did not need a reader, plus my ‘covert’ sneaking around with Nancy, meant that the one constant distinguishing factor between me and the other Littles of reading aloud during story time, was no more. At first, it wasn’t so bad. Most of the Littles left me alone and there was a plethora of books, but I was the new Little around here and some of the more regressed Littles, who bordered on if they should be placed in the Canopy room or in the younger Meadows room, didn’t seem to fully understand the concept of the word ‘no.’ I was quickly learning though, that my ‘no’ and their ‘no,’ were two very different things. “Pway wif me?” one of the Littles asked, toddling up to me today after I had settled in and was reading another book by myself. “No,” I said firmly, but the Little just wouldn’t leave. I tried to ignore them, but I saw the Little then began to pout. “Pwease? I wanna pway wiff you...” “I said no,” I repeated a little louder… too loud, I guess. “Emily!” Miss Valerie admonished me. “We use our inside voices around here.” I nodded and sighed. “Yes Miss Valerie.” I then looked back to the Little in front of me. “Please, kid. I just said no. Go play with that stuffed parrot over there or some other toy like that, or even just another Little for that matter. Just… not me, okay?” The Little nodded and toddled off, clearly dejected, but seemingly fine. I guess they weren’t though, as not five minutes later, I saw them crying and pointing over to me. ‘That little snitch!’ I knew I hadn’t done anything wrong except to say ‘no,’ but those were Earth rules for fellow adults. Being in daycare as a Little, I was finding out just how much the rules around here could be different. Soon, Mrs. Carter marched over to me with her hands on her hips. “Young lady,” she began sternly, glaring down at me from high above. Nervous from her tone and demeanor already, I slowly placed my book down and peered back up at her. “Yes, Mrs. Carter? Is there something wrong?” I tried to play innocent victim as much as I could. From her face though, I don’t exactly think Mrs. Carter bought it. “Don’t play the fool around here, missy,” she nearly spat down to me. “It would do well that if you want to play that angle, I suggest you stop reading the books meant more for the staff than for you Littles.” I glanced down at the book, and I guess Histories of Atlantis to Atlantica would have been a little advanced for most Littles around here. “Sorry…” I then looked back over at the now sniffling Little being rocked around by Miss Valerie. “I just didn’t want to play with them today. I might be a Little, but I’m not that type of Little.” Mrs. Carter frowned. “Just watch out. You’re on thin ice already around here. I would hate for Mrs. Gillies to find out anything more that you’ve done wrong.” I gulped instinctively as Mrs. Carter walked away. Mrs. Gillies was in charge of the whole daycare, and while she would probably do anything to protect her Littles, I also got the distinct impression that she wasn’t the type to be lenient with troublemakers. Despite just wanting to live out my time here until I was going home in one piece, I guess that meant me. A few days later, my reputation hadn’t improved any around here with the staff. Most knew that I was just biding my time until I went home from a slip-up that Nancy made, but I felt a few were giving me odd looks as well. I just chalked it up to them trying to figure out if I was scheming something or going to be problematic for the day, but I guess I should have been a little more careful. I mean, it wasn’t exactly my fault. Being an adult woman, I was coming from Earth here and without any regression procedures or hypnosis done on me, so I was still very independent and thought of myself as an adult. A Little here for sure, but more of the type of classification that on Earth I would be known as a human woman. Not an insult or a judgement on my mental capacity, but just who I was. Looking around even now, there were many types of Littles, but something told me that the staff mostly just lumped us all together. In the Canopy room, most of us were fairly mature and I reveled in being one of the most mature, but that also came at a cost. While for most of the day, I could just lounge about and read to my heart’s content. Playtime and mealtime though in this room, were a different matter. First, I did not want to play dolls or drink at some stupid tea party. That was for babies straight up and I didn’t even entertain the idea. Mrs. Carter and Miss Valerie tried to convince me otherwise and to be a ‘team player,’ but I didn’t want to do some things and I felt I shouldn’t be forced either. So, I was placed further on their ‘problematic Littles’ list, but mealtime was worse. Having been privy to many of the secrets behind the scenes at Mrs. Tatum’s foster home when I helped her out, I knew what a lot of what they were serving was here. The nuggets had the laxative, the milk was just… weird, and the milosauce could be disastrous for any fully unprotected and unsuspecting Little. Some of those issues I had come by literally just reading the labels on the packages, but other times… I’ll just say that I was very grateful that I practically had a bathroom to myself in that foster home. Regardless, I often refused to eat what I was given here for lunch or snack time. Sometimes, some of the kinder workers would notice my plight and would give me something else, but others were more insistent I stick to what the other Littles were given. Mrs. Carter was the more insistent type. “I don’t care what you think you know. Nancy has put us in charge of you during the day, so what we say, goes. Understand, Emily?” I looked at the revolting mush cup before me. I guessed it was an array of fruits mashed up into a plastic cup, similar to milosauce, but I couldn’t be sure. The milosauce was kind of a tannish yellow, but this… I just saw mixtures of brown, red, and purple. “Please… just anything else…” “No,” Mrs. Carter reiterated adamantly. “You either eat this, or we tie a bib around you, I feed it to you personally, and then we tell Nancy when she gets here to pick you up that you were naughty today. How’s that sound?” Her threats were not hollow, and despite Nancy and I being more of equals in about the biggest way we could in our arrangement, I didn’t want her getting a negative report back. She would probably lecture me on me blowing my cover here and that I would get sent back to Mrs. Tatum’s and she would be in trouble with the LPS. Not desiring that fate for either of us, I spooned the alien looking mush and shoveled it into my mouth. I wasn’t really sure what I was expecting, but a myriad of flavors soon assaulted my tongue. Combine cod, rutabaga, raspberries, and maybe spinach or cucumber, and you might just begin to know what I was tasting right then. Seeing Mrs. Carter’s smug smile and anticipating look though, I swallowed it whole. I had to fight my gag reflex about as best I could, but it stayed down. Mrs. Carter’s smile grew, and she then leaned down. “Good girl,” she whispered, “very good girl.” It took all I had to not slug the woman right there for her condescending tone, but she walked off and I continued to down the revolting goop in front of me. Five minutes later, it was empty, and I felt nauseous, but I was allowed to leave the table at least. Not thirty minutes later, however, my suspicions about the mush were proven correct. My guts had been rumbling since I had sat down to read my book. I just wanted to focus on the prince slaughtering the dragon in that particular story, but my stomach, and later bowels, had other ideas. I tried to pass it off as maybe just gas, but right about at that thirty-minute mark, I could quickly feel that it was so much more dangerous. Seeing all the padded rear ends around me, I knew just what was at stake, so I put my book down, to ensure it wouldn’t be ruined from being tossed and that I would be punished as a result, and walked over to the bathroom as gingerly as I could. Now, being that it was the Canopy room, the bathroom adjoining the play area was actually both Big and Little-sized. I wasn’t sure how many Littles were actually making it or even using the potties there, but another grumble from my rear left me little time to contemplate such mysteries in this place. So, I made it over to one of the stalls there, conveniently, a little lower to the ground to ensure privacy, and I let loose. It was terrible and the smell could probably kill some species with any degree of breathing issues, but still though, I had made it. I was erupting hot magma, but I had made it. Unfortunately, even as I washed my hands and exited triumphantly, my success was to be short lived. There, Mrs. Carter was waiting for me sporting yet another scowl etched across her face. “That’s one,” she warned me. “You wait for one of us to take you. You know that.” Feeling put in my place and not wanting to cause a further scene, I nodded. “I’m sorry…” Mrs. Carter grumbled but walked off and left me feeling an odd mix of emotions. I had made it to the potty, a feat that I was noticing from all the crying, that others had not managed themselves. Those donning training pants or panties seemed mortified, but those already in pull-ups seemed devastated. Considering the removal of their name from the pasted tree of Littles in this room in the back corner afterward, it wasn’t hard to deduce that the staff had demoted them both down to the Meadows room and to diapers. Despite my first strike of the day, I knew it could have been worse. And the day continued much like that. The Canopy rules might have been a little more restrictive, but I also knew that we didn’t have naptime like the other rooms in this daycare did. Most of the time, that meant were able to go outside. I wasn’t much for the mud out there sometimes, but the pleasant breezes and sunshine was always a welcome relief. Today though, it was raining, which meant that I was able to stay inside, but that also presented me with a looming problem. Despite the catalog of books in here that weren’t childish, many also seemed to contain propaganda that would always insinuate Littles as hapless and defenseless beings that needed to be cared for. Knowing some of my fellow Littles here, it was an accurate statement for them, but not for everyone… including me. So today, I realized that I had run out of books to read that fit my selection criteria of avoiding both types of books. I mulled about, but when I realized that only left me more open to being begged to join in playing with the other Littles here, I tried to figure out another solution. Just as I was about to read Knowing the Signs Your Little Is Ready, a clear front to eventually get Bigs to demote their Littles back to diapers, I remembered the front lobby had a stack of magazines for awaiting caregivers. I knew it could be a little risky getting to them, but I rationalized that I would just be staying inside the building, so no harm done… right? Having already memorized the patterns of everyone around here when I was bored last week, it didn’t take me long to have realized there was a gap in the staff’s monitoring of the room’s main door, particularly on days where Littles didn’t get the opportunity to burn off their excess energy due to bad weather. “No Timmy! Don’t eat that!” “Put those scissors down Brian!” “That’s not a potty Sabrina!” Smiling a little at my fellow Littles perfect unintended distractions, I knew that it was just possible that both Mrs. Carter and Miss Valerie would even know that I was gone. Sensing my time had come, I quickly slipped out the door and ran down the hallway to the front lobby. Izzy was once again on her lunch break, and I was just tall enough to undo the latch of the front gate to the lobby. In seconds, I was staring at the rack of magazines. “Oh, perfect!” I exclaimed, picking up a magazine that almost looked like the ones I read back home. I knew I probably couldn’t get any nail polish advertised on the front cover from Nancy, but I also saw that there was a whole travel section in the back. “Hmmm… might be inter…” “And just what do you think you’re doing?” I heard a voice thunder. I nearly dropped the magazine on the ground as I spun around to face the voice. There, standing before me and mad as I had ever seen her, was Mrs. Gillies. It didn’t take a genius to realize how badly I had screwed up. “I asked you a question, Emily…” she said impatiently. “Uh, I…” I stammered out. Her sheer size nearly blocking the rainbow-painted wall behind her was enough to cower any Little, let alone just me all alone and doing something I knew I probably shouldn’t have. “I just wanted to, uh… read. I didn’t even leave the building or anything… I just wanted to see and to learn and to…” Mrs. Gillies snapped her hand up to stop me. “Stop. Just stop, Emily.” She shook her head in clear disappointment. “I thought I could trust you as one of the older Littles here, or at least a Little that the others could look up to. I mean, what would the others think if they saw you up here? Don’t you think they would want to follow?” I hadn’t actually thought about that, but Mrs. Gillies only pushed the issue further. “And what if the door had been unlocked. We get packages in here all the time and mistakes happen. So, what if one of your followers escaped and were kidnapped? Or what if they got hit by a car out there?” Her voice thundered now and yet contained a note of sadness over all of it. She was right of course, but I felt I needed to defend myself. “But no one followed me. It’s just a book, Mrs. Gillies…” I tried to offer up as a counterpoint to her argument. I don’t think it worked. Mrs. Gillies shook her head. “Unbelievable… I thought… hoped you would be different here, Emily. I guess I was wrong…” For a moment, I thought she was just going to walk away in disappointment. No doubt Nancy would have gotten a report about my single, now likely double strike, and I would be yelled at when I got home, but I felt pretty safe that I was still fine. Mrs. Gillies, it seemed, had other plans. In a second, she launched herself back over to me, hands first. I had barely enough time to put the magazine down when her hands scooped around my torso. I wasn’t a shorty back home by any measure, but Mrs. Gillies lifted me up like I was just some featherweight pillow into the crook of her arm. “Put me down!” I squawked at my captor. “It was just a magazine. Let me go!” I began to struggle and despite my best effort, Mrs. Gillies only hauled me further back into the main area of the daycare. Unfortunately, I didn’t get the hint that I would be going straight to the back of the daycare, where other naughty Littles went, whether I wanted to or not. So, when I began thrashing about and kicking wildly, I didn’t think of the consequences… or where my legs were kicking. In a second, my leg hit a large lamp, which then toppled over and pulled the phone sitting next to it to the ground. In less than a blink of an eye, the phone practically exploded into several tiny pieces, the lamp cracked, and the lamp shade was permanently ruined. In horror, I stopped kicking, but Mrs. Gillies halted and looked back at the now broken lamp and phone on the ground before sighing. “I guess I was very wrong about you Emily… shame too…” She paused, looked down at the shattered objects on the floor, and then turned around. “That’s two and three…” My heart practically stopped, and my body went limp. Now that my brain wasn’t simply lashing out and being hauled away, I knew strike two meant that I was going to the backroom. Other Littles that had been punished for one discretion or another went back there and would come out minutes later filled with tears and, more often than not, a sore rear end. I was dreading that, but something was different about the Littles that got to strike three. I wasn’t sure what exactly, but they had definitely changed somehow. Passing by one of the ugliest stuffed dogs I think I had ever seen in front of a near drooling Little, Mrs. Gillies finally stopped after passing through the Canopy room where several of the Littles had ‘oohed’ like they were in elementary school… appropriate I suppose. She then went through another door that only the staff used and found Miss Valerie sitting and eating a candy bar. She immediately bolted to attention once she saw Mrs. Gillies. Her face was full of panic. “Mrs. Gillies. I, uh, I swear, I was on my break and…” Mrs. Gillies held her hand up like she did to me to stop Miss Valerie. “Easy there. I don’t mind you taking a break. Today would have been recess if it wasn’t for the waterworks opening everywhere outside today. I know how these rooms can get on days like today and breaks are actually a little encouraged for you all to destress a little. Which is why,” she then peered over at me, and Miss Valerie spotted me as well, “I want you to take Emily here into the back room and then to meet Bee. For now, I will help out Mrs. Carter in the Canopy room.” Miss Valerie seemed stunned for a moment, but after swallowing what I could imagine was a little piece of candy still in her mouth, she nodded. Mrs. Gillies set me on the floor and Miss Valerie held her hand out. “Please take my hand, sweetie.” I could only gulp, comply, and then look back as Mrs. Gillies waved goodbye to me with a giant grin as if she knew something I didn’t about what awaited me next. Stunned and unnerved by everything, I almost wanted to bite Miss Valerie’s hand in desperation and then flee as best I could to a safe zone far away. Passing through a heavy door into what only could be described as a cutesy dungeon of sorts, I quickly decided not to. “Okay, sweetie. This is your first time here. I hope there isn’t another time, but I guess that will just be up to you.” She then gestured to a bench of sorts with padding on the top. “Take seat, chest on the top and bend over. Once you’re situated, don’t move an inch.” Instantly, I knew my fate. It was a little more elaborate than what Kathy had done with me, but I knew the preparation for a spanking by now when I saw it. So, not wanting to make my fate even worse, I just complied as quickly as I could. Behind me, Miss Valerie proceeded to nearly fondle a whole bunch of implements hanging off a rack, but finally chose the ping pong paddle and walked back over to me. “Not very traditional I grant you in some of these cases, but I think it will do the trick for today.” Seeing the large red surface, I just winced and hoped that all this would be over soon. “Okay. Seeing what you have next… I guess just 10 will do today…” she said, rubbing the paddle and then gliding it over my butt. I shut my eyes about as tight as they would go after that. I still trembled in fear, but it only got worse, when she suddenly hiked up my skirt for the day and then yanked down both my tights and my training panties, today’s pair marked by little, tiny hearts. I could hear Miss Valerie chuckle for a moment, but I didn’t have time to contemplate it for long. The first smack roared into me like a freight train. Kathy was sadistic and strong, but Miss Valerie was clearly practiced and powerful. Each smack I felt seemed like the equivalent to two of what Kathy could produce. I was in tears by the fifth smack. My delicate rear throbbed, and the sheer pain wouldn’t go away by the eighth. Still, after ten, Miss Valerie hung the paddle back up and allowed me the dignity to stay there on the bench for a moment before I then lifted my own tights and training panties back up. Despite my punishment, I vowed right then that I would escape this place no matter what as soon as I could if any of this happened again. Nancy was wonderful, but she wasn’t worth what was now occurring at the daycare. Regardless, Miss Valerie then sighed and popped me out of my own thoughts. “I’m sorry about that, Emily,” she said with an almost odd, noted tone of concern. “I really don’t like doing that, but you need to learn to behave. You should know that Mrs. Gillies always gets her way in the end. One way or another…” I wanted to ask what she meant by that, but she only held her hand out once more and towed me to the next room. I wasn’t sure what to expect after the pink and purple room I had just come from, but a medical lab with spots of color and toys was not it. A woman sitting down at the far end of some lab equipment then looked up and placed her glasses on the table in front of her. She quickly saw me being dragged along. “A new girl, Val?” Miss Valerie nodded. “That’s right, Bee. Just a single dose though today, okay? Mrs. Gillies doesn’t want her overdone. Just needs to learn a lesson… got it?” Bee got up and rolled her eyes a little. “I got it, I got it, okay? I’m sure… Emilly and I will get a long just fine. Isn’t that right, sweetie?” I was petrified of the room and of this new woman already as I was being introduced to her, but my mind swam with tons of other questions… namely, how did she know my name? I could hear Miss Valerie sigh again and she then pulled me across the room and got me to sit in a large, padded seat. “Just rest your arm there, sweetie,” she said dejectedly while pointing to the arm rest by my left arm. I quickly complied, still feeling the enormous sting from the spanking I had just endured. I thought that if I complied, I wouldn’t be punished anymore. Making a few clinking noises, I saw that Bee started to prepare something that I couldn’t quite make out. “Is it in place and are we doing the standard first time?” she then asked. Miss Valerie sighed yet again. “Yes… standard and in place.” “Good…” Bee said a little too sinisterly for my liking, but before I had a chance to ask, straps quickly popped out and cinched themselves around my chest, arms, and legs. “Hey! What the hell are you all doing?” I asked in protest, struggling in vain to get loose. “Ooh. Naughty, naughty,” Bee chided me. She then turned around and my eyes bulged out when I saw the shot that she was now carrying back to me. “We’ll fix that right away though… won’t we, Val?” Miss Valerie seemed to be in pain herself and numbly nodded. “You take care of things here… I’ll be… outside.” She then got up and left me alone with Bee. Despite her having just spanked me, I already missed her… or at least compared to the evil doctor-looking woman now approaching me with a giant needle. “Okay!” she said way too cheerfully. “Just one prick and it will all be over.” I tried to struggle, but the straps were too tight. Unfortunately, the ones on my arm were even tighter and the extra straps employed held my upper arm completely in place. I couldn’t even wiggle it more than a millimeter I suspected. The needle plunged quicky into my arm and I swore with the force Bee used, the darn thing would have gone right through. Instead, I just felt the hot liquid enter my arms and quickly get pumped around my body. It was a foreign invader and it burned wherever it went. Oddly though, after a moment, the burning feeling went away, and I was almost left with a buzzing sensation, like the kind you would feel when you were drunk. It wasn’t exactly unpleasant, and I felt almost a whiplash of sorts going from such pain to such pleasure so soon after. Bee smiled down on me. “Perfect. I can already see that it’s working. Shame it’s not more today but considering where you just came from and a few other little secrets I know, I’m pretty sure you’ll be back. Too bad you won’t remember though!” She then cackled a little as she got up and started bringing over another device. “What do you mea…?” but that was about all that I could make out. The buzzing sensation increased, and Bee quickly swung the large machine and a monitor in front of my face. I didn’t think much of it at first, but with each passing moment, I felt more drawn into the center of the pretty colors I started to see… more focused… more sleepy… happier even… I swore I even heard a tinkling noise as my eyes began to droop. I was almost a little scared, but at the same time, I had oddly never felt better and even the stinging in my rear had dissipated. It was nearly pure bliss. I wanted it to last forever, but my exhaustion ruled me more than anything else. Soon, my eyes shuttered close and everything faded to black. * * * My eyes bolted open. ‘Wha…? Where am I?’ My mind turned over and tried to put the pieces of afternoon back into place. Other Littles were just waking up that had taken impromptu naps as well I guessed as myself, but a few also seemed they would be demoted down to something more protective at night. Panicking, my hands shot between my legs, but I sighed in relief. ‘Dry… that’s good at least… Nancy would have been so upset with me over ruining my pretty training panties.’ I smiled at the sensation of being so much older than all these other babies. I could read and write and go to the potty by myself. I was a big gir… I shook my head. I guess I was still just coming out of my post nap slumber and was a little foggy. My arm hurt a bit and my butt definitely stung, but it was just kind of hard to figure out why. It strangely felt like a hangover when I used to drink… ‘When I was a teacher? Was I a teacher?’ I shook my head again and just hoped that my fuzziness would go away soon. It was super frustrating. I guess to some extent, a little later though, it kind of did. To be blunt, I was a little more distracted by then with some of the looks that other Littles or staff were giving me, but I just shuffled it off as both of them being weird in this funny place. I mean, they even had birds in all those lush tree branches all above me. I gazed in wonder and at all the beautiful colors up there. I was so engrossed though, that a book soon slid off my lap. Curious and not remembering the ending, I reopened it. Fascinated with the tale in moments, I just buried my head in a book and just really hoped that the prince would be okay and make it back to his castle and his one true love. ‘It’s so romantic!’ I never read the ending though, as right when he slayed the scary monster, Miss Valerie called out my name. “Emily? Emily?” She then spotted me and smiled. “There you are!” Her arms then waved me over. “Come on! Nancy is here for you out front!” I smiled widely and placed the book back where all the others were neatly stacked. I then made sure to gather up my bag and I was so giddy with excitement, I nearly skipped to the front lobby. It was all so easy and wonderful, and as a bonus, Miss Valerie was so nice to me. I mean, she even held the lobby gate open for me and gave a glowing report back to Nancy about the type of day I had. I was a little glad about that too because some of it still seemed a bit hazy, but I was just so proud of the good day I apparently had here. Nancy strangely seemed to give me an odd look of sorts after, but in the end, I was just happy that we were going home now. As a cherry on top, Mrs. Gillies even stepped out and noted my growing progress here at the daycare, which definitely elicited a smile from Nancy this time, much to my delight. ‘I wonder if I’ll get some ice cream tonight as a treat?’ I still felt a little strange, but if Mrs. Gillies, Miss Valerie, and Nancy were all happy, then I just supposed that everything was good. After all, if they cared about me, then all was good, and their happiness would be mine and I would be safe from all the evils of this world.

Hey everyone! Sorry about the later posting than I was expecting originally. I was all set to edit this chapter last night, but then an emergency came up and I had to push it after my busy day today. Should be able to pop several more of these chapters out this week, so stay tuned. As promised, located next are the two ideas for the story after this one. I usually will give three options, but these were too close to call last time, so just let me know which of them you all would prefer for what I write next. If they are nearly tied again though, I will take the runner-up and add it to my next poll with already some backing behind it. Bethany Set as a semi-sequel to The Opening, follow former drug runner, Bethany, as she strives to find herself a better life that has been promised in the newly discovered dimension, tentatively called, ‘The Amazon Dimension,’ though some have begun calling it another name due to the ever-increasing rumors of something awaiting all portal Littles on the other side. Join Bethany as she looks to turn her life around there and maybe even find a redemption of sorts and something else in the most unexpected of ways. Watch out though, in this new world, new and even greater dangers than the ones she left lurk around every corner. Tell Me More Sequel With this shorter story, continue with Dr. Trisha Mengell from Tell Me More as she dives further into the lives of her patients following the FOY incident over a year ago now. All seems as well as can be with her various Little patients until she notices a frightening pattern begins to develop over time during each session. While it could be nothing and just a fluke in the city or her patient’s mind’s turning softer and more imaginative, follow the good doctor as she explores the truth behind what she might suspect within the very system that she herself is a part of. Moving forward, I will be trying to post as much as I can, barring any emergencies that happen to crop up. My goal is to try and finish this story before the end of the month and try to go quickly with my next one as well so that I don’t have another break coming up next month right in the middle of my story. It’s not the worst, but it’s a big pause that I would like to avoid if all possible. Fingers crossed, but I will let you all know here if anything changes with this plan. Anyways, I hope everyone enjoys this next chapter! Chapter 2: Being a Little Can Be So Complicated Sometimes William Shakespeare once wrote that ‘Hell is empty and all the devils are here.’ Well, I highly doubt that old Billy ever came to this dimension or spent time in a Little’s foster home facility before, but I have to imagine that he experienced at least the next worst thing. See, Nancy and I talked for a long while, but being a shivering Little who’s been bruised and had their clothing ripped into who is also seated between two major players in dealing with Littles, I had no chance of escape it turned out. So, the police had taken me in, but Nancy had essentially assigned herself to me to be my proverbial guardian angel. I don’t even think they believe in that type of stuff here, but she made sure that I was treated well and at least sent to a nice foster home until further plans could be made for me. I wanted to be grateful that I hadn’t ended up worse, like I had heard happened to so many others, but my times at the foster home were trying to say the least. Despite the fact that it was determined and pushed by Nancy that I would be treated ‘older’ amongst the other Littles, I later realized that age is pretty much all relative here when it came to the treatment of my kind in this society. My current multi-colored and star-adorned white training panties, green tights, black Velcro shoes, and cotton dress with the words ‘super awesome’ did little to assuage me that I was really the ‘big girl’ others claimed I was. I suppose, now looking around the room once again to ground myself in my new reality, that things could always be worse. After all, I was wearing leg coverings of some kind, I could walk around, and above all, I wasn’t wearing diapers. Training panties were no picnic, but I knew the same qualities I took pride in that I still had, could not be said for some of my fellow foster Littles. So, since I had gotten here late that night and was given my intro bag for ‘big girls,’ I had been assigned to the older of the three levels assigned to us Littles. Currently, I was the only one up here in the oldest of the rooms, but I was assured by Mrs. Tatum, the supervisor foster mom here, that it wouldn’t stay that way forever. That was two weeks ago, and I quickly realized that being untouched or at least considered a ‘big girl’ around here was pretty rare. Most who came were assigned to one of the lower rooms. It was lonely existence most days, but fortunately, I just busied myself in reading. Mrs. Tatum had a wonderful library, and though most seemed to cater toward the belittlement of Littles in some form or fashion, they still provided me with a way of passing the time. I had already breezed through about six of them, and it would have been more if not for a certain task I was asked to provide, even right now by a few of the other Littles here. See, Mrs. Tatum was only one woman. While her daughter helped during some afternoons, nights, and at least part of the weekend, the other times she had to rely on government-provided volunteers. Seeing I was a teacher and avid reader though, I was gingerly asked if I could provide story time to the other Littles here to give the Bigs at least some free time. Feeling an underlying tension and authority just swell around the kindly but intimidating Big, I accepted my new role. “Miss Emily! Miss Emily!” Taylor, one of the mildly regressed Littles shouted as he pulled on the hem of my dress to get my attention as I had previously buried my head in a book. I gently flopped the book to my chest and peered over at the early 20-something Little now before me. His midsection bulged in a way that could only mean one thing and he was constantly sucking on his fingers when not yelling, laughing, or getting my attention, but he was still okay by me. “Yes, Taylor?” I asked, almost having to distance myself with the other Littles and treat them like the toddlers or babies they often acted like. “Wead to us?” he begged, his eyes bulging practically with tears. He had gotten good at trying to convince me to play with him and his friends, or like now, read to them. Very good. I rolled my eyes and groaned a little bit, having just stopped in the middle of the climax of my own story, but I knew the concept of waiting wasn’t big on most of the Littles here, so I sighed and set my book down. “Okay, but just one for now though, okay? I know it’s nearly naptime and Mrs. Tatum wants you all to get at least one nap in this afternoon.” “Awww!” he said in frustration, going as far as to even smack his foot on the ground. I then stood up and while we almost stood eye to eye, something about the loss of height for some Littles coming through the portal still and his mentality, I could feel him shrink under my watch. It was disheartening to see the former marketing major college student behave in such a way, but after one Big commented on how cute it was that I was playing with the babies one day, I felt the more separation between us, the better off I would be at least. “You know the rules, Taylor. I don’t make them, but just try and be good for me. Can you be a big boy and do that for me?” I then played along with his little game of conspiracies of Bigs everywhere and looked around to see if anyone was listening in before I then leaned over to him and whispered. “I even heard there might be a treat for some of you all if you were behaved today…” His facial features immediately became shocked, and his body went rigid like he was some soldier on parade. I half expected him to salute me right then. “Oh! I’ll be good! I’ll be good! I pwomise!” With that, he then speedily took off back to his level’s playroom, where I knew the rest would be waiting as well. I of course was stretching the truth a tad, just to keep him and the others in line, but given Mrs. Tatum and the way she cared about those under her watch, I highly doubted that there wouldn’t be a treat of some kind tonight. Taylor and the others didn’t need to know that it really wasn’t contingent on their behavior for me during story time. It could’ve been bad if they ever caught on, but for a few moments each time I reminded them, I knew each of the Littles I was about to confront during story time would be on their best behavior, just like always. So, I sighed and went downstairs to the toddler level room. Mrs. Tatum had converted it and the other floors for us Littles into three parts. They were comprised of a single large room and bathroom beyond the hallway outside of them that contained the staircase between levels. This way, the door could be closed to each room easily to allow for naptimes but still have a wide-open space inside for playtime or sleeping when the time was right. Now, when I walked in, each of the Littles were messing around with their own toys, playing make believe, or coloring. As soon as I stepped beyond the threshold though, the six Littles in the room immediately swarmed me. “Woah! Easy there, you all!” I panicked slightly as each tried to climb up on me as if they were really children and I was the adult in this society they thought I was, rather than just everyone here being an adult. Still, despite my outfit and the bruises I was sure to get by tonight, it was nice that I was able to feel mature for one single moment around here. When a Little nearly headbutted me though, I had to put my foot down. “Floor now, or no desert tonight!” A series of gasps flooded the room and every Little hit the floor as if someone had just announced there was an incoming mortar strike. One of the Littles, Justin, quickly looked up at me with wide eyes. “Pwease, Miss Em. We be good. Wight?” he asked as he turned around and asked his fellow Littles. Most nodded right away. Satisfied, he turned back to me and gave me the biggest pleading face I had seen yet here. “Pwease still wead to us?” I chuckled a little at the sight before me. “Oh, alright. I can’t say no to that face, but I need everyone to be on their best behavior, okay?” Each of the Littles before me nodded once again and I took my seat over on the rocking chair in the corner of the room by the shelf of books. Of course, the wood and blue chair showed me just how I small I really was in this world, but only people like me or the Bigs here could sit in it. So, to most everyone else here, it was practically my throne and I smiled as my subjects gathered before me. “Okay… which book did you all want to listen to today?” Each Little started sputtering several titles all at once to me, but I looked over the room and when I saw that Izzy was raising her hand, I raised my hand to quiet the room and then chose her. “Me?” she asked nervously. I nodded. “Yes, Izzy. I chose you today. What do you want me to read aloud today, huh?” The Little scanned the books still not picked off up the floor and then to the ones on the bookshelf. I could see she was struggling to see, or maybe even to read them, and I almost offered to help her out, knowing full well that many Littles sadly lost their ability to read, but she then piped back up. “Uh, can you read If You Give an Alces a Koulouri?” I smiled and nodded. It was quickly becoming one of my favorites to read aloud, as not only was it silly and therefore entertaining to the Littles before me, but because it largely dealt with animals, it was one of the few that didn’t put us Littles down or just outright praise the Bigs. So, smiling, I picked up the book from nearby and opened it to the first page. “Can everyone see?” I saw every Little enthusiastically nod their heads. “Okay…” I then looked to the first page and began. “If you give an alces a koulouri…” I lingered on the page for a moment so everyone could see the moose-like creature on the first page, but using my experience in reading to kids, which is practically most of them were mentally, I then flipped to the next page. “Then he’ll want some cream cheese to go along with it.” A few of the Littles giggled at the humorous imagery and I continued on, knowing that I had them hooked now. Several pages later, filled with the alces ending up with a bunch of koulouris on their wide antlers, and then one more book after that by popular demand, I could see that many of the Littles were already starting to nod off. I still finished the last book, but as soon as I closed the page, I saw a smiling Mrs. Tatum standing nearby. “Thank you, Emily. I think you might just have the magic touch.” I blushed a little at the praise, but I was just glad it was something positive said about me. “Maybe, but I think everyone was tired from the outing in the park earlier today. That really seems to do the trick.” Mrs. Tatum smiled and entered the room fully while two of her volunteers came in behind her. One was a Middle and the other was a Big. I got the distinct opinion that both minded my presence here, but both also took advantage of their time off when I read any of the stories aloud and distracted my fellow Littles. Sensing that it was now naptime, I soon exited the room. Before I did though, Mrs. Tatum gently and briefly paused me. “Are you sure I can’t interest you in a nap as well? Might feel nice.” I hated her persistent question, despite the fact that I was a little tired. The problem was though, I knew it was a loaded question. While I waited for a new passport or for the local government to determine what should be done with me, I had to wait here under the watchful eye of Mrs. Tatum. She was a lovely woman, but she was still a Big and given what I had already experienced, I felt that my maturity was already on the line in this house. My training panties were evidence enough of that. So, I quickly shook my head. “No, thank you though. I might rest a bit upstairs or just get a little more reading in.” Mrs. Tatum nodded but one of the other volunteers briefly scoffed. I ignored it and Mrs. Tatum probably just chalked it up to her now having to deal with a dirty diaper. It was just life around here and I quickly retreated to my room upstairs before any further incident could occur. A few hours later, I found out that Mrs. Tatum had to leave for some errands in town. It wasn’t far, and I could even see it sparkling in the sun from my large bedroom window, but I knew her errand fell right in the middle of dinner time. Now, I’m not picky necessarily and spice is pretty alright with me for most dishes, but mealtimes had become a bit of a bane of my existence here. Beyond the food even, Mrs. Tatum allowed me to eat with the adults at a later time, but when she was gone, her persistent and strict volunteer, Kathy, did not. “I don’t care what Mrs. Tatum allows you to do, Emma. I’m in charge when she’s gone. Not you,” she commanded down to me while in the kitchen. “You will eat with the other Littles and those of us who are actually adults.” “It’s Emily…” I reminded her for at least the third time today. “Come on… just let me please show you that I can at least…” “I said no!” Kathy practically spat back at me. “Do I need to remind you of your official place here? Despite what you do at reading time and what Mrs. Tatum lets you get away with, you’re still a Little. And don’t you go off and forget that. I promise you don’t want me to remind you.” Her words were cold and the only feeling I even remotely felt with her was dominance and ego. I knew my added presence here was a rub on her position as she used to read stories to the Littles herself before I came along. Mrs. Tatum couldn’t decide between us unfortunately, so we left it up to the Littles instead. It was a blind vote and only Mrs. Tatum and the Littles knew the exact final tally, but in the end, Kathy was no longer in charge of story time. Sulking a little, I cherished the fact that I at least was allowed to eat in a relatively normal booster seat at the table rather than the highchairs the other Littles had to endure themselves. Still, my demotion under her watch was a blow to my ego that was hard to swallow. Further, that evil wretch also ensured she gave me Big food to eat after I first asked for something more mature than the smiley potatoes or dino nuggets I had first been served here. It wasn’t always a problem, but for whatever reason, I guess most Bigs had a different palate than ours and most of their food was horribly spicy. I had learned how to cool it down or mellow out the flavor, but I’ll just leave it that the first time I experienced the new food, fire had practically erupted in my bathroom later that night. Regardless though, I got through another meal and was only able to get through another chapter before Mrs. Tatum popped her head in my cracked door, one of the rules being that I was never allowed to shut it. “Time for bed, Emily. Start getting ready and I’ll check on you in a bit. No dilly dallying,” I nodded and sighed as I started getting ready for bed as she had noted. I had fought with her at first with my bedtime being so early, but without a nap during the day and the fact that I had to expel twice the energy the Bigs did just to keep up with them, meant that I soon didn’t mind it and was even grateful for the fact that it was later than all the other Littles here. What I did mind though, was all the checking Mrs. Tatum would do before she let me go to bed. I know she was just doing her job, but as I was the only one in the big room up here, I think she lavished more attention on me than some of the other Littles. So, even as I finished everything, she would still come in and start going through her list. “Wash your face? Jammies? Brush your teeth? Go potty?” I would nod in the affirmative to each of her questions, and I knew I wasn’t upsetting her at least, but the routine was starting to get a little tedious, particularly the annoyingly persistent potty question. Once she was satisfied with all my answers though, she wished me a goodnight and began to leave the room, but something had been bugging me though and I quickly spoke up. “Is it always going to be like this?” Mrs. Tatum froze in the doorway before sighing and returning over to me. I could see she wanted to give me hope, but I could also see the hard reality of this world was jutting in as well. “I don’t think so, honey… I wish I really could give you a better answer than that, Emily, but it’s just so hard to say these days. You never know what’s going to happen next with all you Littles.” She sighed again. “I will say this though… if I can, I’ll try to keep you safe as best I can until you leave this place.” It wasn’t much, but it was that tiny sliver of hope I had been searching for to hear from her tonight. Kathy was getting to be a big problem and I worried about her doing something rash with me every day that she volunteered here and was solely in charge. “Thank you,” was about all I could say, and Mrs. Tatum just nodded and left my room before flicking off the lights. The next two days proved very much the same, but come Tuesday, Mrs. Tatum announced that she had to leave up north to new Columbia to visit her sick sister. She promised she would be back by Saturday night at the latest, but unfortunately, her absence only meant one thing to me: Kathy was now in charge. I quickly felt nauseous. At first, I think the two of us just honestly avoided each other as much as possible, but later that night, I could see the power in her head had been building and selected dinnertime to unleash her wrath on me. I didn’t even question my eating with the rest of the toddler level Littles as I had before, and I was expecting my usual meal of spicy Big food. With how I prepared it now, it was almost bordering on pleasant, but Kathy had other ideas. “Alright everyone, dig in!” she cheerfully chimed from the kitchen as she and the other volunteers then walked in and placed our plates of food in front of us. It didn’t take a genius to see what was wrong with my plate tonight. “Wook at that! Miss Em’s eatin’ the same thing we are!” Taylor noted to the rest of the table. I could feel the hot blush envelop my cheeks as I looked down and saw the vegetables, fruit, and of course, dino shaped nuggets. “Uh, what’s this?” “It’s Littles food, silly. You eat it,” Kathy almost seemed to joke. The other volunteers snickered in the corner as they left to finish preparing their own meal for later. I grimaced and looked down at my plate again. Admittedly, the fruit, vegetables, and even the small pond of ketchup-like substance in the corner of the plate were all fine. The nuggets though… having helped in meal prep for the Littles before, I knew the dirty secret that they were actually the cauliflower kind, but I also concernedly knew that they contained a mild laxative and some potent fiber. For unpotty-trained Littles, it just meant they didn’t get backed up. For me though… “Please, Kathy…” “Uh oh,” she mocked in her sing-song voice she mainly used on the other Littles. To them, it was almost playful, but to me, it was just meant as an insult. “Looks like someone doesn’t want to eat their veggies.” Several of the Littles gasped and I knew I had to handle this carefully. I couldn’t just outright say the reason I didn’t want to eat the nuggets but eating them was a whole other problem as well. “Kathy… I…” “Oh no. We have a picky eater. Let’s start the countdown everyone!” Most of the Littles nodded and I could feel my position weaken amongst them. Before, I was their superior, but now, I was being treated just like any other fussy Little. “One!” they began. I tried to utter out an excuse, but everyone followed Kathy’s lead and they jumped to “two!” before I could. “Kathy… please!” I tried begging again. “I can eat the veggies, but…” “Three!” everyone shouted. There were no halves, quarters, or even eights or thirds getting to three. It was just plain old successive ‘three.’ The word resounded in the dining room and every Little immediately looked at me and then up at Kathy. “Tsk, tsk…” Kathy chided as she shook her head in disappointment. “I guess someone needs a little trip over to the timeout stool…” Every Little here knew about the stool and had experienced it for themselves in the living room at one point or another. It was in the front of the house and prominently situated underneath the naughty chart there to show any visitor or the family when watching TV that the Little seated there had messed up. I had sat there only twice by now, both when I first got here, and my negative behavior was marked by the corresponding two stars. Now, I would be getting a third. And so, it went. Kathy marched me over from the table to the stool and made me sit there for thirty minutes to think about my naughty behavior. In retrospect, I suppose the lesson was for me to learn that I was just like any other Little under Big rules, but I only sat there that night and fumed. In the end, as usual, I still had to eat my dinner, and before I went to bed that night, I could already feel the effects when I went potty as part of my still-present night routine. The next day, once again, I just tried to avoid Kathy, but I was just interminably grateful that I was alone and practically had the bathroom on my floor to myself. Some Littles from downstairs would use it if they could, or one of the volunteers would use it if the one made for them up or downstairs was full, but today, I occupied it the most often. I didn’t have any accidents, but my bowels were wrecked from just the six nuggets I had eaten forcibly last night. For her part, Kathy just despicably grinned at me the whole day. Unfortunately, her toying with me didn’t end there. By Thursday though, I think my resignation and focus on only my bowel issues on Wednesday had left her wanting something more from me. So, my day began with my shower, but when I returned, another volunteer was there. “Look,” Tawnya began, her face looking like she wanted to be anywhere else but there right then. “Kathy scares me as well, and so when she asks me to do something, I do it.” Her eyes then darted over to an outfit on my bed. “I’m sorry…” My eyes widened as I more closely examined the outfit she was pointing to. At first, I thought the checkered seafoam green dress was just like any of the others I had worn here. It had a bow and was shorter than most of the others, but it wasn’t too terrible. Then I saw that I was only going to be able to wear the dress… without any tights on underneath it. “I can’t wear that!” Tawnya sighed. “Please, Emily? Please can you just wear it today? I have a job to do, and Kathy selected that outfit for you specifically. Training panties as well…” My eyes raced back over and saw the thick panties colored in a similar seafoam green with a large whale printed across the butt. My heart raced and I felt that I was eternally doomed if Kathy was to stay here and rule over me, but I resolved it within myself that Mrs. Tatum was really the one in charge. I only had a few days to go, so to keep the peace and for the sake of Tawnya, I just nodded my head. She smiled back at me and helped me get dressed in the new outfit, yet another requirement that Kathy had insisted on lately. I would have protested as well, but I just had to put it out of my mind that I was standing in front of this Big in the nude. I wanted to punch Kathy so hard right then, but I knew grumbling wouldn’t do me any good, so I just braced against Tawnya’s shoulder as she ruffled the panties up my legs when I stepped into them. Finally, the process was done, and I subjected myself to another breakfast with the other Littles, which was followed by another trip to the park. The place was wide, free, and Little friendly, so Mrs. Tatum often took us here to expel our energies. I resigned myself to just reading today, trying to keep my dress as low as I could so I wouldn’t accidentally show off my training panties to just any stranger walking by. It didn’t help that there was also a breeze, and once again, I could see Kathy’s wicked grin every once in a while, when I would glance over at her. Still, we all got back to the foster home in one piece and just in time for lunch. My crust was cut off, my plate was in the shape of a rhino, and my utensils were all plastic, but it was still a good meal. Unfortunately, I also felt a need to pee right then. So, without thinking, I just got up from the table, remembering rule three of the guide for Littles I had read before coming here: if you feel the need to go and there is a bathroom nearby, use it immediately. “And where do you think you’re going?” Kathy sternly asked, looking in from the kitchen. I froze and answered back as politely as I could. “Just to the bathroom…” “You have to ask before you can go potty, Emma…” she shot back with a glare right in my direction. I practically had to stick my fingers in my eyes to keep them from rolling over that statement, but I nodded instead and kept calm. “I’m sorry. May I use the restroom?” I asked, making sure I used the proper question. ‘Can I use the restroom’ was almost universally known as the death knell for any Little as it always raised a legitimate concern with Bigs about Littles; could the Little in question actually go potty? The English teach in me would have been mortified if I tripped up on that sort of trap around here. Regardless, though, Kathy smiled. “Of course you can, honey.” I nodded and ran upstairs. Unfortunately, someone had left their toys on the second floor by the younger Littles room. The Littles in there rarely left their room and were attended to by two separate near-constantly watching volunteers. The house only had two Littles that mental age now and both were practically newborns, having been found in some kind of back alley testing facility. Even then though, it just made Bigs seem to desire them more and there was already a couple willing to take both home by next Tuesday. Regardless, the plastic train stubbed my toe, and I willed everything in my being not to curse out loud right then. I was successful though, and I continued up to my floor. Just my luck though, I had caused a commotion, and it didn’t take long for Kathy to quickly follow behind me up the stairs. “Everything okay?” I nodded and just hoped she would go away. She didn’t. “You have to be more careful on the stairs, Emma. Maybe you just need a little extra help today. Let me go with you.” Before I had a chance to respond, Kathy took my hand and led me up the stairs, her grip near vice-like. Panicking, as we rounded the corner, I took the opportunity of our weaker connection, and I wrenched my arms from hers. “Get off me! I don’t need your help!” Kathy frowned immediately. “Don’t you take that tone with me, missy!” I just walked away, trying to avoid conflict, and still having to pee. I had miscalculated though, and it had the opposite effect. “And where do you think you’re going?” Kathy asked, her hands now situated on both hips and her breathing turning almost into a snarl of sorts. “You apologize to me right now!” At the single moment, I realized I had two options. First, I could apologize, humiliate myself and possibly even show Kathy that I needed her help… at least in her mind. Second, though, I could refuse, and she could get angry and likely punish me further. Seeing as she was already angry though, and the first could just lead to more problems in my future, I shook my head. “No!” As if the hallways had suddenly turned into an echo chamber, my voice seemingly bounced off the walls and appeared to almost shake Kathy right where she stood. For a moment, I thought she might even back down, but sticking to character, she didn’t. “No? What do you mean ‘no?’” Her tone quickly became darker, and her hulking presence inched closer to me as she looked down on me in fury. “You don’t say no to me! You got that? I am a Big here and you are a Little! I don’t care who you used to be or that you’re trying to go back home. You’re in our world now and you’re nothing but a Little. You’re either going to learn your place or you’ll be sorry.” With that finally spat, she yanked my hand and dragged me up the final leg of stairs to my floor. I quickly wondered if I had made the right call in defying her, but something was telling me that I hadn’t. Kathy then quickly stopped in front of the bathroom and my heart dropped. “Decision time. Either be the Little you are or face the consequences. There is no third option.” I looked in the bathroom and saw there was now a child’s potty sitting on the ground next to the smaller toilet, horrifyingly now locked with a heavy-duty mechanism arcing over the top. Even if I said no, I would still need help to get it off or instead just use the little purple potty now in there. At that moment though, I also realized that Kathy was insisting she go in with me while I did my business. Since I was given the training panties on day one here, it was a thought that had utterly terrified me of being watched like a little kid fresh off potty training. It seemed according to Kathy, today was going to be the day that I would cross that line in my potty habits, and I wasn’t sure if it was a line that could ever be recrossed or undone. Now, admittedly, I know a lot of people probably would have just given in, just like I knew before as well that they wouldn’t have turned right at the statue down the alleyway. I know those things and that I’m not perfect either. I was a fully independent and successful teacher back on Earth… no executive I will admit, but one just doesn’t turn off being an adult in these types of situations. I challenge anyone else not to put up a little fight or struggle to maintain their independence at least a little bit in situations like these. So, despite hating myself as soon as I did it, I shook my head. Sadly, it turned out it was the last straw for Kathy. Anger flashed across her face. Her movements were swift and deliberate as she grabbed my wrist once more and dragged me into my room. The basic décor stood in stark contrast to the other more fun and cutesy rooms of the house, but I had always appreciated that. Now, the starkness just gave me less to focus on as Kathy glared down at me. “Don’t you move one muscle.” Her voice was calculating, and I could almost feel myself wince as she then left and went over to a door on one end of the room. It had been locked the whole time I had been there and had just assumed it was another closet in here next to mine. It wasn’t. “Hmmm…” Kathy mused as the door finally opened, “which one today?” I tried to get a better look, but her large Big-sized body just blocked nearly every inch of the narrow opening. “Aha! Perfect!” She retrieved something and quickly closed the door back up before walking back over to me. I tried to make out what was now in her hand, but when I did, I wished I hadn’t. There, all bright red and shiny even, was a long spanking paddle. Holes filled the end that was a little over the length of her hand, making the whole thing just a shade under three feet in total. I gulped as she strutted back over to me with it swaying ominously from her hand. She sat down, smiled sadistically at me, and then patted her lap. “Come, Emily. It’s time you get acquainted with another punishment that most Littles experience at least once. Something’s telling me you’ll be fast friends with it quite soon though.” I eyed the spanking implement balanced gracefully in her hand and my knees seemed to turn into jelly. I wanted to move, but I was finding it hard to take a step further. “I meant now! Don’t make me come over there!” she thundered at my slow movements. Despite nearly collapsing at each step, my fear of her only making things worse for me was a powerful motivating factor. “Turn around,” she then commanded me. I nodded and turned, and to my horror, I could feel her giant hand snatch the back of my training panties and drop them to my ankles. My face flushed with embarrassment, but I didn’t have long to feel it. “Over my lap… now!” I hopped right to it and eased myself over her lap. Her things provided ample room for me to lay down on, but I could still feel the heat rise in my cheeks and my whole body become very uncomfortable as she lifted my short skirt up towards my back. I couldn’t see it, but I knew she now had a perfect target across my vulnerable behind in order for her to ‘teach me a lesson.’ “It didn’t need to be this way, Emma…” Kathy started, almost seeming disappointed in me. “Now, as this is your first spanking here, I will go easy on you. I think just 15 smacks in a row should do.” I could almost feel myself shaking in fear as she began to rub my butt all around. I think it was to prepare my skin or something like that, but it just gave me more time to contemplate my ultimate doom. Under this roof, I felt I was already losing so much of who I was. I had only been here now for a little over two weeks, and there were some rumors that a new passport lately could take three months to be renewed. It didn’t bode well for me at all. “Okay, ready?” she asked in a surprisingly mellow voice. I wasn’t sure why the change was present, but my best guess was that now was business more than her pleasure. Before, intimidation was critical, but now, a lesson being learned seemed more important to her. Regardless, I just nodded my head and braced for impact. “One!” she called out. The first spank hit me like a linebacker and sounded like a thunderclap. I bit my lips to keep from yelling out, but by the sixth, I just couldn’t help it anymore. Fire began to scorch every inch of my posterior and I tried to keep my squirming down, but after each of the thousands of needle-like blows hit me, my who body would go rigid, and I would involuntarily struggle to be free. Still, Kathy was relentless in her punishment of me. AS if she was painting a canvas, soon, there was not a single spot that didn’t ache or scream in pain. I was quickly reduced to a puddle of tears, and my only relief came when Kathy finally reached the magic number, 15. She rubbed my butt for a little longer and even applied some lotion to it. It stung something awful at first, but after a few moments, I felt eh sweet relief of pain, even if it was just for a single moment. Seeming satisfied now, she then carefully helped me stand up again. “Now, are you going to be a good girl for me and listen?” I wanted so badly to tell her no or to screw herself, but my butt just throbbed and ached for me to say otherwise. Not being able to form the words though, I just nodded. It seemed like it was enough and Kathy just smiled and led me to the bathroom, where, under her supervision, I finally relieved myself. “Good girl!” she praised. My cheeks flushed again, but once more, my butt just screamed out to me more than anything else. Still, Kathy seemed happy for once and led me back to my room and turned out the lights so I could have ‘a little alone time.’ I cried myself to sleep and just hoped something would change. Nothing did, but I was about the most compliant Little ever, so even into Friday, all seemed okay between Kathy and I now. By the end of the day though, I could tell she was itching to reassert her authority over me, whether I warranted it or not. So, after dinner, I retreated upstairs with the other Littles. “Oh, Emma?” I turned around and faced my tormentor and many of the other Littles did as well. “I think you’ve had a long week and with tomorrow being Saturday and all, I think you should have an earlier bedtime tonight. How about you have the same as the rest of the toddler Littles, huh?” Despite my bruised posterior, I could feel the anger swelling up inside of me. I wanted to be compliant to at least avoid being punished, but this time, I hadn’t done anything wrong and yet I was still being degraded like all the others. It was too much right in that moment, and I stepped forward… but I felt a hand quickly stop me going further from behind me. I looked back and another Little, Lilly, gravely shook her head. I could tell she was scared for me right away and not wanting to upset her while also seeing the wisdom of her restraint, I nodded. So, I then looked back up at Kathy and summoned just about all the will I could muster to smile politely back at her. “That sounds like a… good idea. Best to be awake tomorrow…” Kathy sickeningly smiled back at me, and I just took it in and retreated back upstairs with the rest of my kind. Lilly soon confronted me as we ascended the stairs. “You getting’ in trouble is jus’ bad, Miss Em.” I nodded in resignation. “I know Lilly. I just… it’s hard, you know?” I could tell she wasn’t completely sure if she did know, but from what I had gathered since, everyone knew about my punishment yesterday and everyone here had received it at one point in their stay here. Despite my lack of information, I knew that if nothing else, though, she was trying to help me out and prevent what had already happened to me from getting worse. “Yeah,” she said a little hesitant. “Just be careful. Dis area’s dangerous for dose who don’ follow da rules, in here or out dere…” I acknowledged what she told me, but it was just a concept that didn’t seem to want to stick in my head. I of course would try and avoid being punished, but there was just a sense of being an adult that I couldn’t shake. Regardless though, I just settled down for the night an hour early and hoped that tomorrow would bring me just that. Now, Saturday is family day around here. Of course, we Littles don’t have family here in this dimension most likely, but it was a day set aside during the week that we all looked forward to for one reason or another. See, it was where prospective caregivers would come and meet with, or even rent out, one of us for the day. The hope was to build a bond between us and them that could ensure a proper fit and later smooth transition if they decided to begin the adoption process. Unfortunately, being the mental age I was, my prospects were usually fairly slim, so my potential escape plan from Kathy later would always come up short. Further, once any Big beyond that hurdle found out I was applying for another passport as well, Mrs. Tatum had informed me that it was practically the final nail in my coffin against me for most. So, as a result, I had spent the past two Saturdays with Nancy, and I didn’t mind one bit. Of course, Nancy would still come around during the week when she could, but her job as a high-level executive at one of the local bigwig companies this week meant that today was the first time I had seen her in a week. From the other times she had come here, she knew about my various struggles, but after this last week with Kathy, I now had a whole new set of problems. “So, she even spanked me on Thursday and sent me to bed early yesterday,” I explained to Nancy once we exchanged our usual pleasantries and she apologized for not making it here sooner. “I’m so sorry to hear that, Emily,” she said was a sad face. Her eyes then scanned over me and I could see her eyebrows raise just a bit. “I see she’s also selecting some… different outfits for you lately?” I looked own at my outfit, this one only composed of tight dark pants and a shirt that spouted the phrase, ‘#1 Princess.’ It was a bit mortifying, especially considering my training panties puffed out against the dark fabric. “You could say that…” We talked for a little while longer, even going so far as to walk around outside as we did so. Kathy almost denied us leaving the foster home, but Nancy got her way in the end after some selective and strong words. Oddly, that type of force against my latest foe had made me see her differently after that. Nancy was a Big, so I wasn’t naive and a little nervous about that, but I would have been blind to say that she wasn’t at least a bit protective of me. It wasn’t much, but at the same time, something was telling me that this week with Kathy, now that it had happened, wouldn’t be the last. If I stayed here, I wasn’t confident that I would be making it back home as the same woman I had left Earth as. So, a new thought popped into my head. It was so simple, and a huge risk on my part, but faced with my current options, it at least seemed the safest path away from Kathy. Mulling it over a bit more, once we passed the swing set that I had come to know so well over the past weeks, I told Nancy my proposal. For her part, Nancy just listened and to my relief, actually seemed to give it some legitimate thought. Still, I could see her hesitancy as well. “I don’t know, Emily… me taking you in from this place? It’s a lot to ask…” I nodded my head. “I know Nancy, but I don’t think I’m going to make it here. Mrs. Tatum and the other Littles are great, but Kathy… I’m just not sure how long I can stay as who I am if she’s treating me like the helpless Little I think she wants me to be. I just feel that something is going to happen and it’s going to cause me a lot of issues down the road. Does that make sense?” Nancy nodded and we then walked another block as our conversation switched around a little. Finally, as we came to a large tree just off the path, she looked back at me. “Okay… I’ll do it, but you need to know, because of your situation and all and my job… there’s going to be some stipulations…” My mind raced with the possibilities, but at least she had said yes. I was so desperate to get away from Kathy and her schemes, that if Nancy asked me to do her laundry every day as that stipulation, I think I would have agreed to it in a heartbeat without much thought. Still, a little voice in the back of my head wanted to know more. “What sort of stipulations exactly?” Nancy smiled. “Nothing hugely impactful, but because of LPS and all, we need to keep up a front for them. At home, you could be free and go to bed at midnight for all I care, but if they ever came over, I would need you to act like the best Little in the world. The slightest hesitation or bad behavior, in their minds at least, and the jig would be up.” She paused for a moment and scratched the back of her head. I braced for what was coming next. “Also… I have a job and I can’t leave you at home by yourself… that would only lead to many things only being worse… for both of us actually.” I didn’t like where this was headed, but I was weighing any options she told to me against what Kathy wanted now and likely in the future. As long as it wasn’t diapers, I felt confident that I would say yes to almost anything. “Go on…” Nancy sighed. “Well, for Littles, there aren’t too many options for during the day, but I think I saw an ad the other day for… to be honest, a daycare.” I think she was waiting for me to bolt, but I just stood my ground. “Yeah… I know it’s probably not ideal, but this place specializes in curated times to occupy your day based on your mentality. It’s got multiple levels for dealing with Littles and is some of the most top tier care in the city. We can always find something else, but what do you think?” Her stipulations weren’t diapers and before, I knew that was about my only caveat in whatever they turned out to be. I had so many other questions, but for now, on the surface level at least, Nancy had presented a way forward to me that just might work. Daycare admittedly, but it was something that seemed better than what fate awaited me with Kathy if I stayed in Mrs. Tatum’s foster home. So, with a sigh, I nodded. “I’m in.” Nancy smiled and we both began walking back to the house to start filling out the paperwork. I would still have another few days at the bare minimum for the paperwork to go through and for Nancy’s house to be inspected by LPS first, but I knew I was taking a big leap into my future. Nancy seemed much better than Kathy though, so I just crossed my fingers and hoped everything would be fine for a few months until I could get my passport back.

Chapter 5 Looking at my parents, I said, “Yes, it’s me.” Pausing momentarily, my mom said, “What happened to your beard? And why do you look like you are back in high school again?” “I’m not sure, after taking a shower this morning, I noticed that my beard was thin and patchy, so I shaved the rest of it off,” I said. My dad then spoke up, “What did the doctor say today, are they doing anything to help you?” I said, “Well, he thinks maybe it's an autoimmune disease. He took a bunch of blood samples to run tests on, and also a urine and stool sample. I also had a bunch of CT scans and X-rays taken today. He is also double-checking for infection but thinks that it is unlikely. As of right now, they have just been giving me fluids and pain meds.” After taking in all of the information, my mom said, “When will the results be back and when will the doctor see you again?” “He said most of the results will be back by tomorrow and he plans on seeing me tomorrow to go over the results. The rest of the results should be back on Sunday.” I said. Before my parents could grill me more, Rachael walked in carrying a large clear I.V. bag with two different compartments. Looking at my parents, she said, “You must be Will’s parents.” With my mom having the same hazel eyes and facial features as me but with lighter brown hair and my dad having the same hair color and before today beard, but turning gray due to middle age and blue eyes, it is easy to tell that I am a product of the two. Without missing a beat, my mom said, “Yes, I am Will’s mother Elaina, and this is Will’s father George.” “It’s nice to you all,” she said. My dad then said, “Hopefully, my son has not been causing any trouble.” I glare at my dad, knowing what he is trying to do. Rachael said, “Not at all.” Looking at me she then said, “OK Will, with you having issues again today with eating, the doctor ordered to give you what is called a TPN. You can think of it like I.V. fluids but with more nutrition in it.” She then burst open the two compartments within the bag and shook it up. Placing it on the I.V. pole, she disconnected me from the regular fluids and then connected the new bag of fluids to my I.V. port. “Is there anything else I can do for you, Will?” Rachael said. I said, “I’m good for right now, thanks.” Chiming in, my mom said, “Thank you, Rachael.” With a smile, Rachael said, “Certainly, press the call button if you need me later on.” Rachael then walked out of the room. I looked at my dad and said, “DAD, not the time!” With a smile, he said, “What, she is very pretty and looks to be about your age, and I didn’t see a ring on her finger.” With a groan, I said, “Right now I don’t even look my age.” With some concern returning to his face, he said, “Alright son, I won’t try setting you up with the nurses … for now.” My mom then said, “I’m with Will on this, I don’t think dating should be on the agenda right now.” My mom took my backpack and set it down on the floor, then took a seat in the chair next to the bed and my dad took the chair from the other corner and moved it beside my mom and took a seat. I grabbed the remote and handed it to my mom and and said, “Here, you or Dad can pick something to watch, I’ll probably just fall asleep.” She said, “OK,” then flipped through some channels and she settled on a network news channel. As I was watching the talking heads drone on about news stories that affect no one, but somehow get people outraged, I fell asleep. I wake up to the need to poop again, I throw the covers off and get out of bed. Before I can get the I.V. pump unplugged, my dad is beside me helping me. Standing up beside him, the new height difference is now apparent. With my dad being 6 foot 1 inches, there was not a big difference between the two of us before; but now it looks like I am closer to my mom’s height of 5 foot 6 inches. With no time to dwell on that thought, I make it to the bathroom with little time to spare. After emptying my bowels and washing my hands, I open the door to the bathroom to see both my parents standing outside the door. Looking at my parents, I can see that they are a little shocked by my height loss and this is the first time that they saw me standing. I can now tell that I am probably only a couple of inches, at most, taller than my mom right now. My mom said, “Will, how tall are you now?” “5 foot 8 and ½ inches was how tall I was this morning,” I said. My mom, not knowing how to respond, said, “Oh, we should probably get you back in bed.” After getting back in bed and my dad plugging back in the I.V. pump, I asked, “Where are y’all staying tonight?” My dad said, “We booked a hotel room not far from here for the night, we dropped off our bags there before coming here.” Grabbing my keys off the table beside my bed, I said, “Y’all can use my car while I’m in the hospital, there is no point in getting charged for parking for the whole weekend and y’all paying for Ubers.” My dad nodded and as I was handing him the keys I said, “The parking stub is in the front pocket of my backpack and I parked on the second floor of the parking garage that is next to the ER. If you want to, y’all can stay at my apartment until I get out of the hospital.” My dad said, “We will keep that in mind, but don’t worry about us, just focus on getting better.” “I will try,” I said. “With traveling today and the time change, we are going to head to the hotel to get some sleep, but we will be back here first thing in the morning.” my mom said. I said, “OK.” My mom, leaning down to hug me said, “Get some rest, I love you and will see you first thing in the morning.” With a quick kiss on my cheek, she stood back up then my dad leaned down and said, “I love you, son.” As he was hugging me. “I love y’all too,” I said. They then walked out of the room leaving me to fall back asleep again. I woke to the feeling of all my joints throbbing in pain. Reaching over to the table, I grab the remote and hit the call button. A few minutes later, Isoline walks in and asks, “Hey Will, what can I do for you?” “Can I get some more pain medicine, I’m in a lot of pain right now,” I said. She said, “Certainly, I will be right back.” She walked out of the room to get the morphine and was back within a minute. With the syringe in hand, she quickly pushed the morphine into my I.V. line. With a sigh of relief, I said, “Thank you.” “No problem, is there anything else I can do for you?” She said. “No, I think I am going to go back to sleep,” I said. She said, “OK, get some rest.” Then walked back out of the room. A few minutes later, I succumbed to sleep. I awoke the next morning thinking about the close call last night with the bathroom. With no time to ponder my midnight bathroom escapades, I’m hit with the immediate throbbing pain in all my joints. I immediately hit the call button. I look to my right and see that my parents are already here sitting beside me. With a worried face, my mom asked, “Is there something wrong?” Gritting my teeth, I said, “I need pain medicine.” “OK, if a nurse isn’t here soon, I will go find one.” She said. Luckily, a couple of minutes later, Rachael walks in. Guessing that she knew what I would be asking for, she already had a syringe in hand. She asked, “Do you need morphine?” I nodded and she quickly pushed the medicine into my I.V. Looking at me, she said, “I figured that you would be asking for pain medicine since you have not had any since late last night.” Taking in a deep breath, I said, “Thanks.” She then said, “Alright, with that out of the way, let’s go and get you weighed and measured.” With relieved joints, I slowly get out of bed. With my parents standing on either side of me, I can tell I am definitely closer to my mom’s height. Pushing my I.V. poll, all four of us make it down to the nurse’s station. Rachael weighs and measures me and before I could even ask, my dad said, “How much does he weigh and how tall is he?” “He weighs a 123 pounds and is 5 foot 7 inches tall,” Rachael said. With frustration in my dad’s voice, he said, “When will the doctor see him today?” With a slight nervousness in her voice, probably not wanting to deal with an angry, protective parent, she said, “The doctor should see him in about an hour.” Walking back to my room in silence, I could feel the tension on either side of me. But either being lucky or unlucky depending on how you look at it, as soon as I passed the threshold of my room, I was hit with the need to poop. With a quick, “I’m going to the bathroom.” to my parents, I detoured into the bathroom. After another ungodly bowel movement with some pee, I wash my hands, brush my teeth, and comb my hair. Exiting the bathroom, I see that my parents are in their ‘assigned’ seating, with my dad watching Sports Center on TV. Settling back in bed, we wait in nervous silence for the doctor. Nodding in and out of sleep, I open my eyes to my mom gently shaking my shoulder. “The doctor is here to see you, Will.” My mom said. Sure enough, at the foot of my bed is Dr. Wilson. “Good morning Will, how do you feel this morning?” Dr. Wilson said. I said, “I’m just tired right now.” Dr. Wilson responded, “I'm sorry to hear that, have you been having any new or worse symptoms?” “No new symptoms, I just have been having worse joint pain and needing more pain medicine,” I said. “We will keep giving you morphine as needed to keep you comfortable. I do have the majority of your test results back. Starting first with your urine and stool sample results show high levels of calcium. Looking at your blood panel results, it is the same as before with high levels of calcium and creatine kinase. We did get the results back from testing for the most common autoimmune diseases and your results were negative for Addison disease, Celiac, Dermatomyositis, Graves, Hashimoto thyroiditis, Crohn, MS, Myasthenia gravis, Pernicious, Sjogren syndrome, Lupus and both Reactive and Rheumatoid arthritis.” He said. Before I could even respond, my mom asked, “What did his CT and X-ray show?” He said, “The X-ray didn’t show anything abnormal and the CT scan did not reveal anything new to us. It is still showing that all of his joints are inflamed, but since we ruled out arthritis, we know it is not that.” My dad asked, “What else could it be?” “Well, I am still waiting on the test results to come back for the more uncommon types of autoimmune diseases, I should have them by tomorrow. Also, the blood culture results should be back by tomorrow, but since he is not running a fever and I am not seeing any other signs of an infection, I expect it to be negative,” Dr. Wilson said. My dad said, “What are you going to do for him in the meantime? He lost 5 inches in height and a little over 30 lbs this week. I’m literally looking at the teenage version of my 27-year-old son.” “I was hoping it would not come to this, but with his extreme weight loss, I will be giving him a nasogastric tube or feeding tube soon. It will bypass his stomach and give him nutrition at his duodenum or the lower stomach that connects to his small intestines. This should allow him to get nutrition without vomiting. I will set him on a feeding schedule of three times a day and will switch him back to regular fluids in his I.V.” He said. My mom said, “How is he losing weight and shrinking?” Dr. Wilson said, “To be honest, with how his symptoms are presenting, I have never seen something like this. It seems that his body is using itself to sustain itself. But instead of getting emaciated, his skeletal system is shrinking to compensate. That is why there is a high level of both creatine kinase and calcium in his blood, but only high levels of calcium in his urine and stool. The body only needs so much calcium to sustain itself and expels the rest.” Before my parents could interject, I asked, “When will you be putting in the feeding tube?” “I will be going to get the necessary supplies and a nurse to help now. I should be back soon.” He said. Before he could get bombarded with more questions from my parents, he walked out of the room. With a concerned look, my mom said, “I think we should get you into a better hospital.” “I think we should at least wait to see what the results are tomorrow. With it being the weekend, I doubt that another hospital will do much for me until Monday.” I said. My mom said, “That is probably true, but as soon as the doctor tells us the results tomorrow, I would like to get you transferred to the Mayo Clinic in Phoenix.” A few minutes later, Dr. Wilson and Rachael walked in carrying some supplies on a tray. After setting the tray tray down on the table beside me, Dr. Wilson said, “Alright Will, with your I.V. in your left arm, I am going to insert the tube in your left nostril. It is probably going to be a little uncomfortable when I insert it and will probably feel a little strange having it in afterward, but it shouldn’t bother you too much.” I said, “OK.” After both he and Rachael put on some gloves, he grabbed one end of the feeding tube while Rachael held the rest, which included some ports. Dr. Wilson said, “I am going to start putting the tube up your nose and when I tell you to swallow, swallow so that we make sure that it goes down your esophagus.” I nodded, then Dr. Wilson started pushing the tube up my nose and when I felt it in the back of my throat, I heard Dr. Wilson say, “Swallow Will.” I swallowed and Dr. Wilson pushed more and more of the tube up my nose as Rachael fed it to him. All the while, I did my best not to gag as it ran down my throat. When he was done, he taped it to my cheek and put the loose end with the port behind my ear. As soon as I was over trying not to gag, I was hit with the sensation of having a weird continuous sinus drain. It wasn’t a bad feeling, but it was a strange feeling to have constantly. Dr. Wilson then asked, “How does it feel?” “It feels strange but not bad,” I said. “Good, with it already close to lunchtime, I am going to get Rachael to start you on your first feeding. It will basically be the adult version of formula. And to avoid any complication with the feeding tube, always keep your bed at least slightly elevated, never lay down completely flat.” He said. I said, “OK, that shouldn’t be a problem.” “I will see you tomorrow morning to go over the rest of the results, please let someone know if you have any issue with your feeding tube.” I said, ”OK.” then both Dr. Wilson and Rachael with the tray walked out of the room. A moment later Rachael walked back in with a new bag of regular fluids and another smaller bag full of an off-white milky liquid. “I'm going to get you started on your feeding and switch you to regular fluids,” She said. I nodded, and then she hung both bags from my I.V. poll, disconnected the TPN bag, then threw both the old, almost empty, bag of fluids and the TPN bag away. She then connected the new bag of fluids to my I.V. and then connected the other bag for feeding to one of the ports on the end of my feeding tube. “Alright, you are all set, let me know if you need anything else or if you are having any trouble with the feeding tube,” Rachael said. I said, “Thanks, I will.” As Rachael was walking out of my room, I turned to my parents and said, “I’m pretty tired, I think I am going to go back to sleep.” My mom said, “That is OK, get some rest, we will be here when you wake up.” On that note, I shut my eyes and fell asleep. I woke to both the throbbing pain in my joints and the need to poop. I turned to my mom and dad, and said, “I need pain meds and I also have to go to the bathroom.” I got out of bed as my dad was getting up to help me with unplugging the I.V. I made my way into the bathroom with my dad behind me and him shutting the door for me. As I am emptying my bowels on the toilet, my joints start to really cry out in pain. By the time I finished wiping and flushed the toilet, I was in too much pain to get off the toilet. I then hear a knock on the door. “Will, is everything alright in there?” I hear my dad’s voice from the other side of the door. I said, “I need pain medicine, but my joints hurt too bad to get off the toilet.” With a short pause, I hear my dad say, “OK, Rachael and I are coming in.” The door opens and in walks, my dad with a concerned face, followed by Rachael. I can tell, they are trying their best not to react to the smell that I just created in the bathroom. Rachael immediately pushed a syringe of morphine into my I.V. line as my dad stood on the other side of me to help me get up. After a few moments, my dad asked, “Are you OK enough for me to help you get up?” After taking a deep breath, I said, “Yes.” My dad then put a hand under each of my armpits and as he was helping me up, with very little effort on my part, I pulled up my sweatpants and underwear. Rachael said, “While your dad helps you back in bed, I am going to go get some saline to flush out your feed tube.” Rachael walks out as my dad hovers behind me as I wash my hands and make my way back into bed. As soon as I am back under the covers, Rachael walks in with another syringe. She walks up to my I.V. pole and disconnects the feeding bag from my feeding tube, then connects the syringe and slowly pushes the saline into my feeding tube, forcing the rest of the milky white liquid to go down the tube. After throwing the empty feeding bag and syringe away, she turned to me and said, “Will, I am going to start checking on you when you are scheduled to be able to have another dose of morphine so that you don’t end up in that situation again. I will also make a note in your chart so other nurses will know too.” I said, “Thanks, that wasn’t fun.” “I bet not, you're scheduled to be able to have another dose around the same time as your last feeding of the day, so I will double check with you then and if you need anything else, let me know,” she said. I said, “OK.” As Rachael was walking out of the room, my mom turned to me and said, “I talked to your brother earlier and he wanted to Facetime you if you were up to it.” “Sure, I feel better now with the pain meds kicking in,” I said. A second later, my mom was handing me her phone while it was calling my brother on Facetime. 10 seconds later, I see both my brother and sister-in-law on the screen. While my brother has the same eyes and hair color as our mom, he has the same facial features as our dad and surprisingly, has a more stockier frame than both of us. Sitting beside him is his wife, with blue eyes, wavy blonde hair that hangs a few inches past her shoulders, and a button nose. I said, “Hi Stanley, Hi Katie.” They seemed shocked, but not too shocked. I guess my mom prepared them and probably sent them a picture of me when I wasn’t looking or sleeping. “Hey Will, Mom told me what was going on. How are you feeling?” He said. “I’m feeling OK right now, but that is probably because I was just given morphine a few minutes ago,” I said. “Ah, the good stuff, I imagine you would be feeling pretty good right now,” he said with a chuckle. Katie, speaking up, said, “We just wanted to check in and see how you were doing and if there was anything we could do for you.” I said, “Not much you can do for me right now, I’m just waiting to see what the doctor will say tomorrow morning.” Before either of them could respond and as if waiting on her cue, I heard a small voice off-screen say, “Uncle Will, Uncle Will!” A second later I see a 2-year-old miniature version of her mom with short curly hair climb into my brother’s lap to look at who is on the screen. “Hey Ellie, what have you been up to?” I said. She looked at me and said, “Uncle Will, play?” Before I could respond, Katie said, “Uncle Will is not feeling good, he can’t right now.” I smiled to myself, thinking that I am probably the only person in the world that has played with a toddler multiple times through Facetime in her play kitchen. The only drawback is that she will forget we are on Facetime and set the phone down and run off to play with other things. And with all the social graces and attention span of a toddler, Ellie slides out of my brother's lap to most likely scatter more toys throughout the house. “Thanks, Katie, As entertaining as our little Facetime play dates are, I will probably just fall asleep on her,” thinking for a moment, I ask, “Where is little Charlie?” Katie said, “He is sleeping in his crib right now, but hopefully, he will be awake the next time we Facetime you.” “OK, well speaking of sleeping the pain meds are kicking in pretty good, so I think I am going to go back to sleep,” I said. Stanley said, “Alright get some rest, we love you and will talk to you later.” “Love y’all too,” I said. I then handed the phone to my mom and as I was falling asleep, I could overhear my mom and dad talking to Stanley and Katie.

I still can't tie laces so most of my footwear has velcro fasteners.

Here is another long chapter, it is still a slow build, but as Will gets sicker, the pace of the story timeline will speed up since this is from his perspective. I will have some time jumps later on in the story since this story takes place over the course of around 9 months and the epilogue takes place around 18 months from the start of the story. As much as a War and Peace length ABDL novel would be fun to read, I do not have the patience or creative skills to attempt to write one. Chapter 4 ‘Shit, Shit, Shit, Shit, SHIT!’ I thought to myself as I was listening to Dr. Richerson. What is going to happen to me? Am I going to be able to go back to school soon? If I get too far behind, will I have to withdraw for the semester? What’s going to happen to my assistantship? Before I could cause myself to start having a panic attack, I heard Dr. Richerson’s voice. “Will, I know this is a lot to take in, but you will be in good hands. I am going to get the nurse to get you ready to be moved up to a room. There will be a specialist that will see you tomorrow and we plan on running more tests to get an exact cause.” In a quiet voice, as I was staring at my lap, I said, “OK, … thanks.” Dr. Richerson gently placed her hand on my shoulder and said, “It will be alright, we are going to give you plenty of fluids and pain medicine as needed to keep you comfortable. Once you are settled in your new room, get some rest tonight and we will figure this out tomorrow.” With a small smile, I looked up at Dr. Richerson, and said, “Thank you, doctor.” With a little squeeze of my shoulder, she then walked out of my room. A few minutes later, Cathy walked in and said, “It looks like you are going to stay with us a little longer. I am going to disconnect your I.V. and your nurse upstairs will connect you to a new I.V. when you get moved to your new room.” I nod and she quickly disconnects the I.V. line and turns off the pump. She then asked, “Are those all your personal belongings?” I said, “Yes,” as I sat up and swung my legs over to hang off the side of the bed. She then walks over and gets my backpack off of the chair and hands it to me. She then grabs all my belongings off of the table and sets them on the bed beside me. She then said, “Someone will be here soon to take you up to your room. I hope you get better soon.” With her departing words, she walks back out of the room. I then stuff all of my clothes and shoes into my backpack. A few minutes later, the same orderly from earlier walks with a wheelchair. He said, “I’m here to take you upstairs to your room.” I nod and stand up with my backpack in hand, and sit in the wheelchair while placing my backpack on my lap. Pushing me out of the room, we make our way down a few corridors and then to an elevator. He hits the call button, and then a moment later the door slides open. Pushing me into the elevator, he hits the button for the 3rd floor. A minute later the door slides back open and I am being pushed down another hallway. We passed by a nurse’s station and then arrived at an open door with the room number 325 on the signage beside it. Pushing me into the room, I see that it is a typical hospital room with a bed in the center, a table with wheels, a chair that can recline in one corner, another straight-back chair in the other, a TV mounted on the wall opposite of the bed and a whiteboard mounted below that is marked with the date, the doctor, the nurse, medication and diet. The orderly stops the wheelchair beside the bed and helps me get up and sit back down on the bed with my backpack sitting beside me. He then leaves with the wheelchair. Looking around the room again, I notice a bathroom off to the side near the room door. From my vantage point, with the door open, I see that there is a counter with a sink, a toilet, and a shower with a tub. Looking back to the other side of the room, there is a large floor-to-ceiling window that overlooks the city of Tempe. After sitting for about 15 minutes, I hear a knock at the door. Turning to look who it is, I see a tall, slim woman wearing light pink scrubs who looks to be about my age. She has long blonde hair, tied up in a high ponytail and blue eyes. In one of her hands, she is holding a bag of fluids. She said, “Hi, my name is Rachael and I will be your nurse; you must be William.” I said, “Yes, but you can call me Will.” With a smile, “I'm going to get you started on fluids.” Within a minute, she had me hooked back up to a bag of fluids. She then said, “You are going to be staying with us for the night, so you might as well get comfortable. Can I set your bag on the chair, so that you can lay down?” I nod and she takes my bag and sets it down for me. I swing my legs into bed and lay back. She then said, “I saw in your chart that you are to be given pain meds as needed. Do you need any now?” I said, “I am fine for right now.” She then responds, “Well, if you need any later, you can press the call button on the remote. The remote also controls the bed and TV as well. I will be here until 7 tonight, then there will be a nurse taking over for the night, but I will be back at 7 in the morning.” I thanked her and then she walked back out of my room. Deciding to take her advice, I empty my pockets of my keys, wallet, and phone. I set my keys and wallet on the table beside the bed and unlocked my phone. Looking at the screen, I see that it is 5:46 pm and think where has this day gone? My next thought is that I am going to have to call my parents. Thinking, ‘Well let’s get this phone call out the way.’ I hit the screen to call her and waited for her to answer as it was ringing. I hear my mom answer and say, “Hey Will, what did the doctors say?’ I said, “Well, they are not exactly sure what is going on. They think it is some sort of autoimmune thing. They admitted me into the hospital and I am supposed to see a specialist tomorrow.” My mom then said, “Did they give you any more information? Do they know why you are throwing up?” I responded, “They said that the CT scan showed that all my joints were inflamed, but my abdomen looked fine. With the bloodwork results, it looks like my body is attacking my bones and muscles. The weirdest thing was that somehow I am now a 135 pounds and 5 foot 10 inches.” I hear a pause on the line, then in the background, I hear my dad say, “WHAT? You lost 2 inches and lost 20 pounds.” At that exact moment, my stomach started turning and I got the need to poop again. Without wasting any time, I almost shouted into the phone, “Mom, Dad, I have to go to the bathroom now, I will call you back.” I tossed my phone on the bed beside me and rolled out of bed. Unplugging the I.V. pump, I grabbed the I.V. pole and pushed it into the bathroom with me. Closing the door behind me, I sit on the toilet and again poop an almost ungodly amount. After wiping, flushing, and washing my hands; I push the door open and slowly make my way back to bed. Plugging back in the I.V. pump, I lay back in bed and grab my phone. Looking at my phone, I see that I am still on the line with my parents. I said, “Hello, are y’all still there?” I hear my mom say, “Yes, what happened, are you alright?’ I said, “Yeah, it’s just anytime I have to go to the bathroom, I need to go almost immediately.” My mom said, “Well have they done anything to help with your symptoms?” I said, “Yes, the fluids have helped with my headache; they think that I was just dehydrated. They have given me pain meds for my joint aches. They tried letting me drink some chicken broth today, but I just threw it back up.” My mom said, “Well, me and your father plan on being on the next flight out there tomorrow.” I quickly replied, “Y’all don’t need to fly all the way out here, I should hopefully get some answers tomorrow.” In a stern voice, my dad said, “Son, you lost 20 pounds and 2 inches in height, you have not been able to eat or drink in two days, and you don’t have any other family members within a thousand miles of you. We will be there tomorrow. I don’t want to hear any ifs, ands, or buts.” In a meek voice, I said, “OK.” My mom then asked, “What hospital are you staying at?” I replied, “Tempe St. Luke’s, I am staying in room 325 right now.” My mom said, “Okay, we will see you tomorrow, get some rest and text or call us if anything changes. We love you.” I said, “I love y’all too.” Hanging up, I set my phone down on the table. I take the remote turn the TV on and start to surf through the channels. With it being basic cable, there is not much to watch, so I settle on reruns of Criminal Minds. Within 30 minutes of watching TV, I fell asleep. I wake up to my joints throbbing in pain. I grab the remote and hit the call button. A few minutes later a short Latino nurse walks in who looks to be in her early thirties. She is wearing dark purple scrubs and has black hair and brown eyes. Thinking to myself, ‘It must be after 7 pm.’ She introduces herself with, “Hi Will, my name is Isoline, and I will be your nurse tonight. What can I do for you?” I said, “Can I get some more pain medicine?” She said, “Sure, I will be right back.” She then walks out of the room to return a minute later with a syringe in hand. She walks over to my I.V. line and connects the syringe to the port. With a push of the plunger, relief washes over me within seconds. She then said, “Alright, you should be feeling better now, do you need anything else?” I said, “No, but thanks for the meds.” She said, “No problem, let me know if you need anything tonight.” I said, “OK, thanks.” Isoline left me to myself to get some rest. I reclined the bed to a flat position and got under the covers. With the meds taking effect, it did not take me long to succumb to sleep. I wake the next day to the sun shining and my I.V. pump beeping. My joints are throbbing again and I waste no time and hit the call button. As I am waiting on a nurse, I note that despite having to sleep in the hospital last night, it was not as bad as I imagined. I was only woken up once to get my vitals checked and once I had to rush to the bathroom to poop and surprisingly pee too. I hear a knock at the door to shake me out of my thoughts. I see that it is Rachael. She said, “What can I …, I see that you need more fluids” She then pressed some buttons on the pump to get it to stop beeping. She said, “Well, besides for fluids, do you need anything else?” “Can I get some more pain medicine?” I asked. She said, “Sure, I will be right back.” A minute later, Rachael was back with a bag of fluids in one hand and a syringe in the other. She swapped out the empty bag of fluids with the new one, then took the syringe and pushed the meds into my I.V. line. I let out a sigh of relief as the medicine took effect. She looked at me and said, “The doctor wants to get your height and weight this morning. Can you follow me to the nurse's station?” I responded by getting out of bed and grabbing my I.V. pole. She gestured for me to follow her and I walked behind her to the nurse station. I stand on the scale that is in the corner behind the station and she weighs me and I turn around on the scale for her to measure my height. Stepping off the scale and with Rachael standing right beside me, I notice that she is a few inches taller than me. Looking up at her, I asked, “If you don’t mind me asking, how tall are you?” She looked at me and said, “I am about 5 foot and 11 ½ inches tall.” With concern in my voice, “Uh, how much do I weigh and how tall am I?” Glancing at her notes, she said, “I recorded you weighing 129 pounds and having a height of 5 foot, 8 and ½ inches tall.” With a shocked look on my face, I said, “I don’t know if you would believe me, but just a few days ago I was 6 foot and 155 pounds.” She paused for a second, then said, “I saw in your records that it stated that you have lost some height and weight. This is something that I have not seen before, but I have full faith in the doctors finding out what is going on today.” With that statement, she gestured for me to follow her back to my room. Walking back into the room I said, “Is it alright if I take a shower? Besides taking a quick one yesterday morning, I have not taken a shower in days.” She said, “Sure, there are towels, washcloths, soap, and shampoo in the bathroom. There should also be a disposable toothbrush and toothpaste on the sink counter. By the time you are done showering, I will have a clean gown and socks for you to change into.” I said, “Thanks,” and made my way over to my backpack resting on the chair and grabbed the extra pair of sweatpants and underwear that I had packed. Pushing the I.V. pole, I enter the bathroom and shut the door behind me. I turn the shower water on, then begin to strip off all of my clothes. I positioned the I.V. pole beside the shower and after testing to see if the water was warm, I stepped in. After letting the warm water run down my body for a few minutes, I wash my hair and rinse the shampoo out. Grabbing a washcloth off of the towel rack by the shower, I lather it up with a bar of soap. As I am washing my body, I am shocked to notice that all of my body hair is thinning. Rinsing off all the soap, I turned the shower off, grabbed a towel, and quickly dried off. Stepping out of the shower, I slip on my underwear and sweatpants. As I stood in front of the mirror, I was shocked by the reflection that was staring back at me. My beard is thin and patchy and my face looks like the face of me in high school. Not being able to dwell on it too long, I am hit with the need to poop. I turn around and sit down on the toilet to release another colon’s worth of poop. As I am sitting on the toilet and despite all that is happening to me, I still chuckle to myself at the thought of what Daniel Tosh said about a post-shower shit, ‘I might as well go back to bed and start my day over again.’ Deciding that I am done pooping, I wipe, flush, wash my hands, then take the toothbrush and toothpaste and brush my teeth. I also found a comb to comb my hair with. Looking back at my patchy beard, I sigh. I never tried growing a beard until I was in my early twenties, because I thought that it looked weird having partial facial hair. I think to myself, ‘Back to being clean shaved I guess.’ I put the towel, washcloth, gown, and socks in a pile on the floor and grab my dirty sweatpants and underwear. Walking back into my room, I see that Rachael kept her word and there is a folded-up gown with socks on top. I toss my dirty clothes on the chair by my bag and put on the clean gown and socks. I then hit the call button on the remote, sit on the bed, and wait for Rachael. About 10 minutes later, Rachael walks in. “What can I get for you Will?” she said. “Can I get a razor and some shaving cream? My facial and body hair seems to be falling out. I usually can grow a full beard,” I said. After staring at me for a second, she re-composed herself, then said, “That is a symptom that you will need to discuss with the doctor today; in the meantime, I will go and get you a razor and shaving cream.” A minute later, Rachael is back with the razor and shaving cream, and I go back into the bathroom to shave off what is left of my beard. After wiping off my face from shaving, I look into the mirror and see my mid highschool self looking back at me. I still have dark bags under my eyes, but looking at myself, I don’t look a day over 16. Thinking that there is no use in causing myself to have a panic attack, I walk back into my room, lay back in bed, and turn the TV on for background noise as I wait for the doctor. Watching reruns of Law and Order, I fell asleep. I wake up to a knock on the door. I then see a man walk in wearing khakis, a light blue button-down shirt, a dark blue tie, and a white lab coat. He looks to be in his early forties and has light brown hair and brown eyes. “Good morning Will, I am Dr. James Wilson, how are you feeling this morning?” he said. I said, “I have been better, the fluids and pain medicine have been helping.” “That is good to hear. Could you please tell me all of the symptoms that you have been having over the past few days,” he said. I managed to tell him about the vomiting, strange bowel movements, joint pain, excessive tiredness and weakness, and headaches. I also told him about the height and weight loss. “There is one more thing that I noticed this morning. When I was taking a shower, it looked like all my body hair was starting to fall out. After taking a shower, I also noticed that my beard was thinning and patchy. I had to shave what was left off due to it looking so bad,” I said. After pausing for a second to think, Dr. Wilson said, “It seems that you have some odd symptoms. It does look like an autoimmune disease of some kind, but your symptoms do not look like some of the more common ones like Lupus. I am going to have blood cultures taken to rule out an infection that could have been missed yesterday. I will order another blood panel to see if anything changed from yesterday along with testing for different autoimmune diseases. I would like to take another urine sample and a stool sample too. I will put in an order too for a full body CT scan and X-ray. Do you have any questions?” I said, “Uh, … not really. Do you know when I will have the results back?” “We should have some of the results back today, but most of the test results will not be in until sometime between tomorrow and Sunday,” he said. “OK,” I said. “One more thing; I know that you have not had any success with eating and drinking over the past few days, but I would like for you to try eating some jello or soup broth today. If you still cannot keep it down, then we will need to explore other options for getting nutrition in you,” he said. I replied, “I will try eating some jello at lunch.” “I will put the orders in for everything and will see you tomorrow to go over any of the results that come back,” he said. I thanked him and he walked out of the room. I grabbed my phone off of the table and saw that I had a text from my mom saying that they should be at the hospital between 4 and 5. With a quick “thumbs up” response, I see that it is 11 am. I think ‘crap’, I am supposed to be in class today. Then I realized that I never finished my abstract algebra homework that is due today and I left my ODE homework at my apartment when I emptied my backpack that is also due today. Opening up my email, I composed an email to all three of my class professors, including my applied matrix theory class. In the body of the email, I told them about me being sick since Tuesday night and that I am currently in the hospital, and that it looks like I will be here for at least over the weekend. With the email complete, I hit send. Not knowing what next week has in store for me, I pull up the email chain from Dr. Lau and explain in the email about me being in the hospital and that it is best to go ahead and plan for me possibly not being back next week to teach. I go on to explain that all of the students' assignments have been graded but the quiz from the class on Tuesday and yesterday. I then tell him that the quiz from Tuesday is in the top drawer of my desk in my office if I am not back in time to grade them. After hitting send, I see Rachael walk in pushing a cart. She said, “Will, I am going to draw some blood.” I nod then she pushes the cart by my bed and takes out all the supplies to get a blood sample. She then begins to fill what looks to be around 12 vials of blood. When she was done and putting a bandaid on my arm, I jokingly said, “It seems like I am donating blood, not giving a sample.” With a smile, she said, “It certainly looks that way.” She then takes two other items off of the cart. Turning back to me she held up a clear cup and said, “This is for a urine sample.” Then holding up an opaque white container that looks like a Tupperware container, she said, “This is for a stool sample, I am going to leave both containers in the bathroom for the next time you have to go. Is there anything you need from me?” I said, “The doctor wants me to try eating something, could I have some jello please.” She said, “Sure, do you want strawberry, orange, or lime?” I said, “I will take the lime.” She said, “I will be back in a few minutes with your jello.” She pushed the cart back out of the room and returned about 5 minutes later with a single-serving cup of green jello with a plastic spool. She then said, “Please let me know if you get sick after eating this so I can let the doctor know.” I responded with a “Yes”, she walked out of the room and I began tearing into the small cup of jello. Within seconds of setting the empty cup on the table, I feel the need to throw up. I reach for the vomit bag on the table and a moment later I am throwing up the green jello into it. As soon as I am done dry heaving, I get the need to poop again. Not wanting to waste any time, since I need more time to get a sample, I get out of bed with the vomit bag in one hand and then unplug the I.V. pump with the other. Pushing the I.V. pole, I throw the used vomit bag away in the medical waste bin as I make my way into the bathroom. I grab the container for a stool sample and remove the lid. Looking for the best way to do this without making a mess and overfilling the container. I stood in front of the toilet and with one hand holding the container below my butt from between my legs, I hover over the toilet to let the first wave of poop into the container. As soon as the first amount of poop is deposited into the container, I immediately clench my cheeks and pull the container from between my legs and plant my butt onto the toilet to finish pooping. As I am sitting on the toilet, I feel the need to pee. Thinking to myself, ‘This is the first time ever, that I will have to hold my bladder while pooping.’ I hurriedly finished, wiped, and flushed. I grabbed the urine sample cup, stood back in front of the toilet, collected a sample, then emptied the rest of the contents of my bladder into the toilet and flushed. I put the lids on both containers and washed my hands. I made it back to bed and hit the call button for Rachael. A few minutes later, Rachael walks in and asks, “Did you have any trouble eating your jello?” I said, “Yeah, as soon as I was finished eating, I threw it back up.” She said, “I’m sorry to hear that, I will let the doctor know, is there anything else I can get for you?” “No, but I was able to get a stool and urine sample. Both samples are on the bathroom counter,” I said. “OK, someone should be here soon to take you to get your X-ray and CT scan.” Rachael then grabbed the samples and walked out of my room. About 30 minutes later an orderly was walking into my room. After getting me situated in the wheelchair with my I.V., we made the 5-minute journey back downstairs to the radiology department. I was first given a full body x-ray that only lasted about 15 minutes, but halfway through the full body CT scan, the morphine was beginning to wear off. By the time the orderly got me back into my room, I was clenching my jaw from the pain in all my joints. I hit the call button and Rachael was in my room within minutes. Rachael asked, “What can I get for you, Will?” Through a clenching jaw, I said, “I need pain meds now!” She said, “I will be right back.” She almost ran out of the room. In under a minute later, she was speed walking back in with a syringe in hand. Wasting no time, she pushed the medicine into my I.V. line. With relief written on my face, I said, “Thank you.” She said, “I'm glad that helped, get some rest, you had a busy day so far.” On that note and with the pain medicine taking full effect, I fell asleep. I awoke sometime later to both my parents standing at the foot of my bed with puzzled looks on their faces. I then hear my mom say, “Will?!?”

Thank you all for welcoming both me and the story back to the board Don't hesitate to give your comments on the story and lets continue to move things along Chapter 33: The morning sunlight streamed through the curtains, coaxing me awake from the depths of dreamland. The scent of pancakes and bacon wafted through the air, but was soon overtaken by the smell of stale urine and a very messy diaper. As I blinked away the remnants of sleep, the realization hit me – today was amusement park day. Mommy entered the room, her eyes lighting up with affection upon seeing my wakeful state. "Good morning, my little adventurer! Looks like someone had quite the night," she greeted with a playful twinkle in her eyes, seemingly unfazed by the morning surprise. The fresh morning air mingled with the aroma of a diaper change in the making. Mommy, ever the pro at navigating our morning routines, approached with a cheerful demeanor. "Mo-ni, momy!" I mumbled around my dummy, as she untangled me from my bedsheet and got busy inspecting my soiled diaper, unsnapping the crotch of my onesie one by one "POP! POP! POP!" "Oh, what a messy little boy you are. Yes him is!" She announced cheerfully, before reaching to the side of the bed, producing a small changing mat, that she proceeded to place under my diapered bum. The snap of a fresh diaper being unfurled echoed in the room, and the crinkle of plastic signaled the beginning of the morning ritual. "Ready for a fun-filled day at the amusement park?" she chimed. First, Mommy unfastened the tapes of the used diaper with gentle precision. The room held a mix of familiar scents – baby powder, wipes, and the remnants of the night's adventure. The used diaper, now containing evidence of nighttime activities, was carefully lifted away, revealing the aftermath of the night. With a stack of wipes at the ready, Mommy began the cleansing process. Each wipe was applied with a gentle touch, efficiently cleaning and refreshing with a routine born out of countless diaper changes. Once the cleaning was complete, Mommy disposed of the used wipes and unfolded a fresh diaper. The snap of the elastic and the soft crinkle of the plastic signaled the arrival of a new beginning. With practiced hands, she positioned the fresh diaper beneath me, ensuring a snug and comfortable fit. The velcro tabs were fastened with a reassuring precision, securing the fresh diaper in place. The room, once filled with the traces of the night, now carried the scent of baby powder and the promise of a new day. As Mommy completed the diaper change, her eyes met mine with a warm smile. "All done, my little one," she announced, as she guided me up from the changing mat into a seat position, where she proceeded to pull the onesie over my head and off my body, leaving me in only my new fresh diaper. "Wanna go, say good morning to Granny and Aunty Karen?" She asked excited. I tried smiling around my dummy and nodded my head up and down. "Then let’s go, sweetie. Don't forget "Mr. Rabbit": She reached under the covers and produced by trusted companion, which I proceed to cradle close to my chest, as Mom took my hand and guided me out of the bedroom, towards the kitchen, still clad in nothing but a diaper and my building puppy fat. "Moarming, gravy!" I greeted loudly around my dummy, as we entered the kitchen. "Morning, sweetheart" Granny greeted back, turning around from the kitchen table and placing colorful plastic bowl onto the dinner table. The house buzzed with anticipation as I sat at the kitchen table, the vibrant hues of my toddler-themed plate catching my eye. Mommy, with a smile that mirrored the excitement of the day, approached, her hands cradling a jar of carefully prepared baby food. The jar held a medley of flavors and textures, a concoction of fruits and cereals blended to perfection. The label, adorned with cheerful illustrations, the cartoons on the label drew my attention away from the wording on the glass. "Breakfast time, sweetie!" Mommy announced, her voice carrying a blend of affection and playfulness, as she tied a birght yellow bib around my neck and took a designated seat next me to at the table. A small baby spoon, its handle adorned with playful colors, awaited its role in this morning ritual. Mommy dipped the spoon into the jar, scooping up a portion of the creamy mixture. The aroma of fruits and cereals wafted through the air, a comforting fragrance that signaled the beginning of the meal. "Open wide, baby!" She announced, before guiding the spoon to my lips with a tender touch. The creamy baby food met my tongue, the flavors a gentle blend of sweetness and familiarity. A zippy cup, filled with diluted apple juice, complemented the baby food feast. Sips between spoonful’s added a refreshing element to the meal. As I sat there, being fed spoonful after spoonful, the house came alive with the bustling energy of Granny, Aunty, and Jack getting ready for the amusement park. Footsteps and the distant chatter formed a backdrop to what could have been any toddler household in the country "Hurry up, Susan! Karen and Jack are almost ready." Granny shouted from across the house. "Okay, mother!" Mommy responded as she feed me the last spoonful of pure, before allowing me to empty the zippy cup and wiping my mouth with the bib. "Let’s get you ready, Baby". Mommy announced, taking me by the hand and guiding me back to the bedroom. Before dressing me in my outfit for the day, Mommy once again covered me in a thick layer of sunscreen, leaving my skin a milky white color. Afterwards she produced a light yellow onesie, with a large teddy bear on the chest. "Arms up." She commanded, before pulling the onesie over my head and closing it at the crotch, sealing in my puffy but still clean diaper. Next came a pair of light green shortalls, which she guided me into, pulling them up onto my hips and snapping them securely into place across my shoulder. The shortsalls like my onesie came with snaps in the crotch allowing for easy access. The outfit was finished off with a pair of white socks. "Don't you look handsome?" Mom applauded, as I turned to see myself in the mirror. The bulk of my diaper made my hips look rounded and the extra body fat I was carrying was starting to make me look like the stay puft marshmallow man. If it had not been for my height, you could easily have confused me for any other toddler. "Oh, we can't forget this!" Mom reached around me from behind and secured a clip onto the chest of shortalls. The clip had a long string attached and at the end hung a bright green pacifier. "Can't have you losing your dummy, can we?" She smiled, before grabbing my hand and guiding me out of the bedroom. In the hallway Mommy quickly helped me into my white tennisshoe, trying a nice bow with each shoelace, before putting on her own shoes as we exited the house and made our way out into the driveway. The vibrant morning sun cast a warm glow on driveway and as our family gathered in front of the house , the anticipation of the day's adventures bubbling in the air. Mommy held my hand, her fingers entwined with mine as we approached Grannies car, a practical yet unassuming minivan, stood ready for the journey ahead. The doors slid open with a soft whoosh, revealing a black leather interior and 3 rows of seat. 2 in the front, 2 in the middle and a long row of 3 seats in the back, one already occupied by Jack's carseat, which Aunty Karen was quickly to get him strapped into. Mommy guided me towards the open door, my yellow onesie almost the same color as the warm sunrays that were blasting down from upon. I was guided into the back seat next to Jack and strapped in tightly, as Mommy planted a gently kiss on my check. "All set." She announced before closing the door and climbing into the seat in front of us. Granny occupied the driver's seat, her hands confidently on the wheel. Aunty Karen next to her in the passenger seat. The trunk looked to be tightly packed, with everything needed for the day. Including both mine and Jack's diaperbags, but only one stroller for Jack. "A stroller" I chuckled to myself. I was too old to write in a stoller. "I may be wearing a diaper....A wet diaper. But only really small babies need to ride in a stroller. I'm be enough to walk on my own." I gave myself a mental pat on the shoulder, before reaching for my pacifier and putting between my lips. "Is everyone ready for a fantastic day at the amusement park?" Granny's voice, tinged with excitement, echoed through the car. As the engine started to hum and the car sat in motion, I reached for and grabbed "Mr. BunnyRabbit" tightly. The minivan started to glide down the familiar neighborhood streets, the scenery transforming as we ventured toward the amusement park. The wind whispered through the windows, carrying with it the promise of laughter, rides, and shared moments. As the minivan merged onto the highway, a sense of unity enveloped us. The amusement park loomed on the horizon, its colorful attractions visible from a distance, inviting us into a world of whimsy and delight. Granny and Aunty, engaged in playful banter in the front seat, as the car made its way onto the highway. The sun cast dappled patterns through the car window, creating a kaleidoscope of light that danced across the interior. Mommy, with her ever-watchful eye, exchanged glances with me through the rearview mirror, before producing a small plush toy handing it to Jack. Jack gurgled with delight, as his tiny fingers started exploring the plush fabric teddy bear. Our eyes met, and in that shared moment, a silent understanding passed between us. Despite the age difference, we were on the same level, as we both clutched our respective teddy’s. As we neared the amusement park, a familiar warmth spread in my diaper. I shifted slightly in my seat, as the diaper soaked up the warm urine, leaving my skin nice and dry. After about 20 minutes the minivan slowly glided into the bustling parking lot of the amusement park, as Granny found a parking spot amidst a sea of vehicles. The engine hummed to a gentle halt, and with the twist of the key, the car fell silent. Granny, with practiced ease, turned around from the driver's seat. "Alright, everyone! We're here!" she announced, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. Excitement filled the air as Jack started bouncing in his carseat, while both Aunty and Mommy let out a loud “Jubi!” The adults opened their doors and exited the car. All 3 of them looking casual smart in their summer dresses. Mommy soon arrived at my door and helped me unbuckle and get out of the seat, onto the warm parking lot. While Karen got busy unstrapping Jack, I took a quick glance around the lot, which was buzzing with large families, many with small children, some younger than Jack but many his age and dressed just like him……and me, diaper bulk and all. The trunk popped open, revealing a well-packed array of bags, snacks, and essentials for the day. Granny, ever the planner, efficiently directed the unloading process. Mommy turned to me with a smile, reaching for my hand. "Ready for some fun, sweetheart?" she asked, her eyes brimming with enthusiasm. I nodded eagerly, holding tightly onto "Mr. BunnyRabbit. Karen unfolded Jack's stroller, securing him snugly in its embrace. The stroller a bright colorful fabric with cartoon prints, held my baby cousin tightly in place, as Granny used the room below Jack’s seat to store all our essentials for the day. Jack’s diaperbag was hung on the handle by Karen and as Mommy swung my diaperbag across her shoulder we were on our way. "Look at you, Jack! All set for an adventure, too," Mommy cooed, adjusting the sunshade to shield him from the bright sunlight, before grabbing my hand tightly. With the stroller ready, we made our way towards the entrance. The distant sounds of laughter, carousel music, and roller coaster screams grew louder with each step. The anticipation bubbled within me, matching the infectious energy of the park. Granny took the lead, navigating through the crowd with a confident stride. Aunty Karen walked beside her, engaged in conversation and occasionally checking on Jack in the stroller. Mommy held my hand securely, guiding me through the sea of people with ease. As we approached the entrance gates, the vibrant colors and whimsical designs of the park's entrance arch came into view. The scent of cotton candy and popcorn wafted through the air, triggering a sensory overload of excitement. "Here we are, my little adventurers!" Granny exclaimed, her eyes gleaming as she ushered us through the entrance turnstiles. The park unfolded before us like a magical wonderland. Brightly colored rides towered in the distance, their mechanical sounds blending with the laughter and chatter of families enjoying the day. The sight was overwhelming yet thrilling, and I couldn't help but bounce on my toes with excitement. Mommy knelt down, adjusting the clip on my shortalls gently placing the pacifier in my mouth. "There we go, sweetie. Now, who's ready for some unforgettable moments?" I gave her a big smile behind the shield of the dummy, which won me a large kiss on the forehead in return. We approached the ticket booth, its vibrant colors matching the whimsy of the amusement park. A friendly-looking ticket clerk, adorned in a uniform with a name tag that read "B-uh,uh-O-B….BOB, his name was BOB!," greeted us with a warm smile. "Hello, folks! Ready for a day of fun?" Bob asked, his eyes scanning our group. Granny stepped forward, her voice filled with enthusiasm. "Absolutely! We'd like three adult tickets and two child tickets, please." Bob nodded, punching numbers into the ticketing system. As he processed the request, his eyes lingered on our group, pausing slightly when they reached me. His brows furrowed in momentary confusion. "Three adults and two children, right?" he clarified, his gaze fixed on me. Granny, sensing the slight hesitation, spoke up with a chuckle. "Yes, indeed! These 2 little ones are our youngest adventurer." Bob, looking somewhat skeptical, glanced at me again. I stood there, clad in my toddler-themed outfit, clutching "Mr. BunnyRabbit" with my dummy bouncing up and down between my lips, with each suckle, which only got faster as faster, as Bob continued to scan me up and down, adding to my anxiety. The bulk of my diaper added to the illusion of a younger age. After a thoughtful pause, Bob smiled, seemingly making up his mind. "Alright then, three adults and two children. Enjoy your day!" Relief washed over me as we received our tickets, and I couldn't help but giggle around my pacifier. The amusement park welcomed us with open arms, and the ticketing hurdle only added an amusing twist to the day's adventure. Mommy ruffled my hair playfully, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "Looks like someone got an extra dose of cuteness today." With our tickets in hand, we strolled further into the park, the vibrant surroundings inviting us to explore. The distant sounds of rides in motion and the sweet aroma of treats filled the air, creating an atmosphere of pure joy. The amusement park buzzed with activity, the air filled with laughter and the distant hum of rides in motion. Our group, a blend of generations, ventured deeper into the park, each step carrying us closer to new adventures. Mommy held my hand, her fingers interlocked with mine as we walked along the lively pathways. Jack giggled in his stroller, seemingly delighted by the vibrant colors and the cheerful atmosphere. Despite my initial desire for more thrilling rides, Mommy led the way to child-friendly attractions, a knowing smile playing on her lips. "Look, Patrick! The Merry-Go-Round!" Mommy exclaimed, her eyes bright with excitement. She guided me towards the ornate carousel, where colorful horses pranced in a circle. "Mommy, can I ride the big roller coaster?" I asked, my eyes sparkling with excitement. Mommy crouched down, her eyes meeting mine. "Not this time, sweetie. Look, the carousel is perfect for you!" I glanced around, my eyes catching sight of the larger, more daring rides in the distance. The towering roller coasters and spinning contraptions beckoned to me, igniting a spark of adventure within. However, Mommy had other plans for our amusement park day. "Let's hop on, sweetie!" Mommy said, leading me towards the ride. Reluctantly, I agreed, as Mommy helped me onto a majestic white horse. As the carousel spun around, I clutched the brass pole, my eyes fixed on the world twirling around me. Jack giggled from his stroller, seemingly delighted by the rotating spectacle. As we circled around, I couldn't help but steal glances at the more thrilling rides that loomed in the distance. The desire for bigger adventures tugged at my imagination, but Mommy's watchful eyes kept us firmly grounded in the realm of child-friendly delights. As we strolled through the bustling park, the distant sounds of roller coasters and exhilarating screams filled the air. The yearning for more thrilling adventures continued to tug at me, and I couldn't resist sharing my desires with Mommy. "Mommy, can we please try one of the big rides?" I pleaded, my eyes wide with anticipation. Mommy, with a tender smile, crouched down to my eye level, her hand gently resting on my shoulder. "Oh, sweetie, I know you're eager, but today is about enjoying the park as a family and Jack is way too small to go on those big scary rides….And they are also WAY too high for you and Jack." "But, Mommy, I'm not as little as Jack, Jack is way littler and much more a baby than me." I protested, my disappointment evident. She chuckled softly, her fingers brushing through my hair. "Oh my, you sure are, adventurous today, Baby. Next time we’ll go on the bigger rides, but today we’ll stick with safe and fun experiences that we all can enjoy. Okay?" I pouted, my lower lip protruding. "But I want to go on the roller coaster. Please, Mommy?" I pleaded stomping my feet into the ground. Mommy's gaze softened, and she cupped my face in her hands. "I promise we'll have lots of fun on the rides we choose today. There's so much magic in these attractions, Jack loves them and I want you to do the same." With a sigh, I nodded, reluctantly accepting Mommy's decision. Despite my yearning for bigger thrills, the warmth of Mommy's love and the shared joy of the day gradually eased the disappointment. We continued our journey through the park, my hand firmly clasped in Mommy's, ready to embrace the magic of the kiddie rides, even if my heart still longed for the daring adventures that loomed in the distance. We moved from one ride to another, my enthusiasm for daring experiences met with a series of whimsical attractions. The Tea Cups, the Flying Elephants, and a charming Train Ride all became part of our day. Each time, Mommy, Karen’s and Grannies encouraging words and Jack’s infectious laugh made me enjoy the “baby-rides” more and more. In the midst of the swirling colors, laughter, and the rhythmic churning of rides, we navigated the amusement park. Despite my rather conspicuous attire—a diaper that seemed to rival the size of a toddler's and a onesie adorned with a teddy bear—I was just another face in the sea of revelers. The sun beamed down, casting a warm glow on the multitude of families bustling about. Children's laughter intertwined with the mechanical sounds of rides, creating a symphony of joy that enveloped the park. As I walked hand-in-hand with Mommy, the velcro tabs of my diaper crinkling softly with each step, I couldn't help but marvel at how seamlessly we blended into the carnival of happiness. My onesie, splashed with pastel colors and hugging my diapered form, felt oddly normal in this fantastical setting. The green shortalls, my white socks, and the plush toy I clutched seemed less like oddities and more like essential accessories for a day at the amusement park. Amid the diverse crowd, we were just another family weaving through the pathways, Granny's confident stride, Aunty Karen's infectious laughter, and Jack's occasional coos merged with the ambient sounds, becoming part of the harmonious melody that echoed through the park. Passersby, caught in the whirlwind of their own adventures, glanced at us briefly. Some wore curious smiles, while others were too engrossed in the allure of the rides to pay much attention. It was as if my oversized toddler persona was just another stroke in the vibrant canvas of this fantastical world. As we moved from one attraction to another, my occasional waddle and the bulkiness of my diaper beneath the shortalls seemed inconspicuous. As we strolled through the vibrant chaos of the amusement park, the high-pitched excitement of a young child's voice pierced the air. "Mommy, Daddy, look at the big baby!" The exclamation was accompanied by a tiny finger pointed directly at me. A hush seemed to fall around us as curious eyes turned in our direction. My cheeks flushed with embarrassment, feeling like the center of attention in a crowd that suddenly became acutely aware of our unconventional presence. However, the child's parents, discerning the need for sensitivity, quickly intervened. "Honey, we don't point and stare. People might have special needs, and it's important to be kind," the mother explained to her child. Despite the parents' attempt to educate their child on empathy, the gaze of the crowd lingered. I couldn't escape the feeling of being on display, my oversized toddler outfit attracting more attention than I was comfortable with. Mommy, sensing my unease, knelt down beside me and whispered reassuring words. "It's okay, sweetheart. Sometimes people don't understand, but we're here to have fun. Their opinions don't matter. You're my special little one, and we're making wonderful memories today." I nodded, taking solace in Mommy's comforting embrace. Her words were a shield against the prying eyes and whispered comments. As we continued our adventure through the amusement park, Mommy held my hand a little tighter, creating a haven of reassurance amid the swirling sea of curious onlookers. However, as the hours passed, a subtle challenge emerged. The ever growing bulk of my diaper, concealed beneath my toddler-themed outfit, began to make its presence known. My steps, once filled with the boundless energy of anticipation, now carried a hint of hesitation. Mommy, ever perceptive, noticed the change. "Are you having fun, sweetheart?" Mommy asked, her eyes filled with genuine concern. I nodded, trying to conceal the slight discomfort. My enthusiasm remained intact, but the physical demands of the park, coupled with the bulk of my diaper, added an unexpected layer of challenge to the adventure. As we continued to explore, the struggle to keep up with Mommy became more apparent. The child-friendly rides, though enjoyable, couldn't fully satisfy the yearning for more thrilling experiences. I glanced longingly at the towering roller coasters, my desire for excitement conflicting with the constraints of the day's chosen adventures. Amid the hustle and bustle of the amusement park, our group decided to take a break. We spotted a nice, grassy lawn with scattered picnic tables – the perfect spot to rest our tired feet and refuel. Mommy, in her excitement, spread out a colorful blanket, making a cozy spot for us to relax. As we prepared to sit down, Mommy's expression shifted from delight to concern. "Oh no, I forgot Patrick's zippy cup. I can't believe I left it behind." A look of mild concern crossed her face as she surveyed the bustling food area, the lines for the vendors extending far beyond what seemed manageable. Mommy double-checked my diaper bag just to be sure, her fingers rapidly moving through its contents. The realization that the zippy cup wasn't there crossed her face, and she sighed. Aunty Karen, had in the meantime unstrapped Jack from his stroller and placed him on the blanket between herself and Granny suddenly decided to chime in. "No worries, Susan. I've got something that might work." She reached into Jack's diaper bag and pulled out two baby bottles filled with a fruity drink. Mommy's face brightened with relief. "Karen, you're a lifesaver! Thank you so much." Aunty Karen grinned, handing one of the bottles to Mommy. "The temperatures are rather high today and I thought the lines for food and drinks may be long, so I brought an extra drink for Jack, just in case. And they are even spill proof.” She chuckled. Mommy accepted the bottle with gratitude, but my eyes widened with uncertainty. A baby bottle? Surely, this wasn't intended for me. I'm a big boy, not a baby. Karen noticed my hesitation and said, "Patrick, it's just a drink. No need to start crying, see your Cousin Jack loves his baba.” She gently placed the rubber nipple between Jack’s lips, as he started to suckle almost on instinct and placing both his tiny palms around the bottle Mommy nodded in agreement, "She's right, sweetheart. It's just for today. We'll get your zippy cup next time. And look, Jack's enjoying his." While Mommy was visibly happy about the solution, I couldn't shake off the feeling that sipping from a baby bottle was reserved for, well, babies. Nevertheless, with everyone looking at me expectantly, I hesitantly took the bottle from Mommy. The amusement park buzzed with excitement around us as I held the baby bottle in my hands, its pastel colors and cute design oddly complementing my toddler-like outfit. Mommy, Aunty Karen, and Granny chatted cheerfully, as Karen continued helping Jack hold his bottle, as he sucked away, all of them seemingly unaware of the internal struggle I was facing. Looking down at the bottle, I hesitated. The plastic nipple stared back at me, a symbol of innocence and infancy. Taking a deep breath, I brought the bottle to my lips. The rubbery texture of the nipple pressed against my mouth, as I tilted the bottle, the sweet fruity drink flowed into my mouth. A mix of embarrassment and amusement washed over me, but surprisingly, the experience was oddly satisfying. The cool liquid offered a refreshing break from the excitement of the park, and a small smile formed on my face. It wasn't about being a baby or a big boy; it was about being carefree, I didn’t have to worry about spilling on myself and as I suckled away on the rubber nipple I slowly closed my eyes and leaned backwards, rolling flat onto my back, as I drank the sweet nectar while the warm sun continued beaming down us. As I continued to sip from the baby bottle, I caught Mommy's eye. She beamed with pride and joy. Aunty Karen playfully raised her eyebrows, acknowledging the small victory of overcoming my initial reluctance. As the cool drink flowed through the bottle's silicone nipple, I sipped tentatively, feeling a mix of awkwardness and amusement. Despite my initial reservations, the sweet flavor and the novelty of the moment gradually lessened my self-consciousness. After our brief break on the grass, we resumed our amusement park adventure. Granny, Karen, Mommy, Jack comfortably seated in his stroller, and me with my diaper slightly more burdened than before, strolled from ride to ride, immersing ourselves in the whimsy of the colorful attractions. The sun hung high in the sky, casting a warm glow over the vibrant surroundings. Laughter and cheers filled the air as families reveled in the joyous atmosphere. Next we ventured to a miniature Ferris wheel, its cheerful pastel carts beckoning us to take a seat. As Aunty Karen secured herself, me and Jack into our colorful capsule, I felt a sense of giddiness, the anticipation of the ascent building within me. The wheel creaked into motion, providing us with a gentle, elevated view of the park. As we descended from the Ferris wheel, my diaper felt heavier, and my steps became more pronounced. The repeated walk from ride to ride and all the time spent standing in line for each ride were starting to take its toll on my legs. Mommy noticed my struggle, her keen maternal instincts sensing my weariness. "Patrick, sweetheart, are you okay?" she asked, concern etching her features. "I'm fine, Mommy," I assured her, though the effort it took to keep up with the pace was evident in my slightly wobbly steps. Undeterred, Mommy led us to a whimsical teacup ride adorned with bright colors and playful designs. As we spun in our cups, I couldn't help but lose myself in the dizzying delight. Yet, the physical toll lingered, and my diaper, now thoroughly saturated, added an extra challenge to my steps. Our family continued to explore kiddie rides, each one contributing to the sense of childlike wonder that permeated the day. My initial desire for bigger thrills gave way to the infectious joy of the simpler, more age-appropriate attractions. We spent the next hours or so, wandering from ride to ride, taking in all the sounds and colors around us. Next Our journey through the amusement park brought us face to face with one of its most endearing characters – a giant yellow teddy bear, adorned in cheerful shorts and a vibrant t-shirt. The bear's friendly demeanor and welcoming gestures attracted a crowd of excited children and parents alike. “Wanna, go hug teddy?” Mom didn’t ask as much as she commanded, guiding me toward the huggable teddy bear. Jack, nestled securely in his stroller, observed the oversized bear with wide-eyed wonder, as Karen pushed him closer. As we gradually progressed in the line, the anticipation heightened. The oversized teddy bear stood tall, its furry presence radiating friendliness. The atmosphere around us buzzed with the infectious enthusiasm of families eagerly awaiting their turn for a warm, plush hug. However, amid the festive ambiance, an unexpected dilemma unfolded within me. Unbeknownst to the vibrant surroundings, a growing pressure in my bowels signaled an impending challenge. I desperately tried to focus on the lively chatter and laughter, but the urgency of the situation intensified with each step forward. Mommy, completely absorbed in the festivities, held my hand with unwavering excitement. The giant teddy bear loomed larger as we approached, its outstretched, furry arms seemingly reaching out for an embrace filled with enchantment. Yet, as we stood in the line, the pressure in my bowels reached a critical point. Panic set in, realizing that this cherished meeting might not go as smoothly as hoped. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead as I discreetly shifted from one foot to the other, attempting to alleviate the growing discomfort. The line continued to move, and the children ahead reveled in the joy of hugging the giant teddy bear. Glancing nervously at Mommy, I offered a hesitant smile, the internal struggle intensifying with each passing moment. I really wanted to meet “Teddy” and give him a big old bear hug, but the pressure on my bowels were building with each passing seconds. With every step I felt the pressure build and my belly bloat. Soon I felt myself let out a cascade of runny wet fart, with each step. I grabbed my dummy from the front pocket of my shortalls and quickly shoved it between my lips, hoping that my trusty comforter would aid me in my time of need, as I started suckling away, as the goal of meeting “Teddy” Finally, our turn arrived. The giant teddy bear leaned down, its plush arms extended for a warm embrace. Despite the escalating discomfort, I hesitated, grappling with the dilemma unfolding within me. The bear, unaware of the unforeseen challenge, maintained its cheerful demeanor. “Go ahead Honey. Give Teddy, a BIG bear hug” Mommy encouraged, pushing me forward towards the giant mascot Summoning every ounce of courage, I leaned into the teddy bear's embrace, desperately hoping that the discomfort wouldn't escalate further. The bear, committed to preserving the enchantment, interacted with the crowd, blissfully unaware of the unforeseen predicament. As I pressed against the bear's embrace, a familiar warmth spread through me, a sense of comfort in the midst of the rising tension. However, the brief respite was short-lived, as the pressure in my bowels reached a critical point. With a sudden surge of warm liquid, my diaper surrendered to the inevitable, as my bowels emptied themselves into the back of my nappy. A wave of mortification washed over me as I realized the catastrophic turn of events. The warmth spread throughout my diaper, confirming the embarrassing reality. I tried to pull away from the bear's embrace, but its plush embrace held me firmly in place. Despair gripped me as I struggled to maintain my composure. The laughter and chatter of the surrounding crowd seemed to intensify, as if amplifying the depth of my humiliation. I felt a tear well up in my eye, blurring my vision. With a final desperate attempt to regain control, I pushed away from the bear, my diaper now sagging low underneath my onesie and shortalls soggy mess. I turned to Mommy, my face flushed with humiliation, tears streaming down my cheeks, as the pacifier dropped from my mouth. "Mommy, Mommy! I made poppy!" I wailed, my voice trembling with distress. Mommy's eyes widened in surprise, her initial reaction of concern quickly overshadowed by the realization of the situation, as I rushed into her arms, "Oh, sweetheart, it's okay," she soothed, her voice a reassuring balm. " Did you go poppy? It’s okay, Honey, accidents happen, don’t worry." The crowd around us had paused their conversations, their gazes fixed on me. A hush fell over the group, and I felt a hundred pairs of eyes boring into me. The humiliation intensified, and I buried my face in Mommy’s shoulder, the tears continuing to flow. I could feel the warmth of my soiled diaper against my skin, fueling my embarrassment. As she took my hand leading me through the crowd and away from the scene, the whispers grew louder, and I could hear snippets of the conversation. "Did you see that? He pooped his pants!" "Poor kid, I feel so bad for him." "At least he has a loving Mommy to take care of him." The words swirled around me, adding to the chaos of my emotions. I felt like I wanted to disappear, to melt into the background and erase the memory of this humiliating incident. Mommy held me firmly, her comforting presence a beacon amidst the storm of emotions. She shushed me gently, her voice a soothing melody in the midst of the cacophony. Despite her comforting words, I couldn't shake off the feeling of mortification. The warm, damp sensation of my soiled diaper against my skin only fueled my humiliation. As Mommy lead me out of the crowd towards Karen and Granny who had observed the scene from a distance, the tears continuing to flow. The weight of the day's events, the physical strain of the park, and the unexpected mishap had overwhelmed me. “We’re going to find a changing room, he made a real mess of his Nappy. We’ll catch up with you guys.” Mom announced to the rest of the group, before dragging me towards the nearest restroom, tears still streaming down my face. In that moment of vulnerability, I felt a deep sense of gratitude for Mommy's unwavering love and support. Despite my childish outburst and the embarrassing situation, she remained my anchor, her presence a soothing balm to my wounded spirit. "Don't worry, sweetheart," Mommy whispered, her voice a soothing balm against the turmoil within me. "We'll take care of this right away." She navigated through the bustling crowd, her eyes scanning for the nearest restroom sign. A pang of anxiety struck me as I realized we were heading towards the family restroom, a place reserved for babies and toddlers. I imagined the stares, the whispers, the pitying looks. As we reached the family restroom, my tantrum slowly subsided and exhaustion washed over me, my breathing gradually returning to a normal pace. The family restroom, a refuge from the vibrant chaos of the amusement park, unfolded as a spacious haven. Soft, ambient lighting bathed the room, creating a comforting atmosphere within its confines. The walls, adorned with colorful murals depicting whimsical scenes of families enjoying the park, added a touch of playful charm to the space. As we entered, the restroom revealed its thoughtful design. A spacious area accommodated a changing mat, though, in my case, it seemed comically small for my size. The scent of baby wipes lingered in the air, a familiar fragrance that mingled with the subtle hum of the amusement park just beyond the door. “One second baby.” Mommy quickly had my changing mat unfolded on the floor and gently guided me back down onto the soft plastic covered surface. Mommy's hands moved with practiced precision, emphasizing her ability to handle unexpected scenarios. The restroom offered a degree of privacy, shielding us from the lively energy of the amusement park. The soundproofing of the walls provided a sanctuary where the occasional laughter of children outside was a distant melody, allowing us to focus on the immediate task. The bulkier diaper, evidence of the encounter with the park mascot, was efficiently disposed of in a discreet bin. Mommy, with the well-practiced routine of a seasoned caregiver, reached for the wipes and began the cleansing process, each wipe applied with a gentle touch Once the fresh diaper was unfurled, its soft crinkle echoing in the confined space, Mommy secured it with a reassuring precision ensuring the snug fit of the new diaper. The changing room door creaked open, and a mom entered, her one-year-old happily bouncing in her arms. She stopped dead in her tracks for a brief moment, as she caught sight of the women kneeling down in the middle of the charging room in the process of taping her adult overgrown toddler son into a fresh white diaper. Giggles and coos filled the air as she settled her baby on the changing mat beside ours. The colorful, cartoon-themed walls of the family restroom seemed to close in, amplifying the already palpable tension. "Hi there!" the new mom greeted, her eyes momentarily flickering between her own baby and the giant toddler laying sprawled out on the floor in front of her. Mommy, who was mid-diaper change, looked up with a warm smile. "Hello! Looks like we've got a bit of a diaper party going on here." The new mom chuckled, unfolding a changing mat for her little one. "Oh, the joys of parenthood. Diapers, diapers everywhere." As both women got on with their diaper changing duties, a playful atmosphere filled the air. Mommy smiled warmly, "Oh, how adorable is your little one! Such a cutie pie." The other mom beamed with pride, "Thank you! And your little guy here is just precious too. I couldn't help but notice your little one," the new mom finally gestured towards me with a curious smile. "Isn't he a bit big for diapers?" I shifted uncomfortably, aware that my age wasn't the typical topic of conversation for moms changing their babies. Mommy, however, took the lead. "Patrick here is our big baby. He's got his own pace, you know," she chuckled, gently nudging me. The new mom's eyes widened with a mix of surprise and amusement. "Oh, how cute! I didn't realize they made diapers that big." She chuckled. "Oh, I see! You're a big boy, huh?" she cooed at me, causing my cheeks to flush. Mommy joined in the laughter, "Yes, he is. But sometimes, even big babies need a little extra care, right, sweetie?" She winked at me, emphasizing the playful spirit of our outing. The other mom nodded, clearly enjoying the banter. "Absolutely! They grow up so fast, but we have to cherish these moments." Mommy seized the opportunity to make the situation even more entertaining. "And speaking of cherishing moments, Patrick here loves making new friends. Isn't that right, sweetheart?" I glanced at Mommy, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and amusement. The other mom played along, "Well, hello there, Patrick! You're such a big boy to be in diapers, aren't you?" I managed a shy nod, my cheeks burning. Mommy, reveling in the camaraderie, teased, "Oh, he's just a big toddler at heart. Diapers and all!" As the two moms continued their friendly banter, Mommy seized the opportunity to add an extra layer of playfulness. She turned to me with a mischievous glint in her eye. "Patrick, sweetie, say hello to the little baby here. Can you wave to your new friend?" Mommy cooed, her tone intentionally exaggerated. My cheeks burned with embarrassment, but I obediently lifted my hand in an awkward wave, glancing away from the amused gaze of the other mom. The crinkling of my diaper seemed to mock me as I engaged in this toddler-like gesture. Mommy, not done with her impromptu performance, continued with a giggle, "And what do we say when we meet new friends, Patrick?" I mumbled a shy, "Hi," feeling like a toddler on a playdate rather than a young man on a family outing. The new mom couldn't contain her laughter, finding the whole interaction quite amusing. Mommy, enjoying the light-hearted moment, added one more touch to the act. "Isn't he just the cutest big baby you've ever seen?" The other mom nodded, her amusement evident. "Absolutely adorable!" The two moms shared a hearty laugh, and as we left the changing room, Mommy continued to pat my diapered bottom, adding a final playful remark, "Such a good boy for waving to the baby. Diapers and all!" The sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow on the vibrant rides and bustling crowds as our day at the amusement park drew to a close. Families all around the part slowly started to gather their belongings and prepared to leave. Mommy knelt down beside me, offering a comforting smile. "Time to go home, sweetie. We've had such a wonderful day, haven't we?" I glanced around, the colorful lights and cheerful sounds tempting me to stay a little longer. Realzing I’d spent a whole day at the park and not managed to try a single ride, that I ACTUALLY wanted to try, having spent the whole day ridding stupid kiddie rides and the fact that the the day was ending triggered a toddler-like resistance within me. I planted my feet firmly and crossed my arms, a pout forming on my face. "No go home!" I protested, my voice taking on a whiny tone, reminiscent of a stubborn toddler. Mommy chuckled, trying to soothe my protest. "Oh, but we need to go home now. We'll be back another time and next time we’ll try AAAALLLLL the big rides, I promise." I shook my head, my pacifier dangling from my lips. "No home! Want more rides!" A few onlookers couldn't help but smile at the scene unfolding – a seemingly oversized toddler throwing a miniature tantrum. Granny soon knelt down next to me, putting both hands on my shoulders. "Now, now, my little adventurer. We'll come back and have more fun next time, okay?" She cooed, attempting to ease the disappointment. “I think he’s just overtired, Mother.” Mommy announced to Granny gently moving her aside as she grabbed a firm hold of my wrist. “All the lights and sounds is a lot for such a little guy. Isn’t it, Baby?” It wasn’t a much a question as a statement. My feet dug into the pavement, mimicking the stubbornness of a toddler unwilling to leave the playground. A chorus of "No go home!" erupted from my pacifier-clad mouth as Mommy, realizing she couldn't carry her full-grown son, resorted to dragging me gently by the hand. Passersby couldn't help but glance at the spectacle – a young man, dressed like a seemingly oversized toddler diaper an all, throwing a miniature tantrum, pacifier dangling, and Mommy persistently leading the way. Some chuckled at the absurdity, while others exchanged bemused glances. My cheeks flushed with a mix of embarrassment and determination, my pacifier occasionally popping out as I protested the impending departure. Mommy, maintaining her composure, spoke soothing words, promising future visits and more exciting adventures. As we approached the exit gates, my whiny protests echoed louder. The park staff exchanged amused glances, some snapping covert pictures of the unusual scene. Mommy, with a mix of amusement and exasperation, glanced around, catching sight of sympathetic smiles and a few stifled giggles from other park goers. As we neared the exit gates, my toddler-like tantrum drew the attention of the park staff. Among them was Bob, the older male ticket clerk who had scrutinized me earlier. His eyes widened as he witnessed the spectacle, a mixture of surprise and amusement evident on his face. I locked eyes with Bob, who couldn't help but crack a smile at the sight of a pacifier-wielding "toddler" adamantly resisting departure. Mommy, though slightly flustered, shot Bob an apologetic grin, silently acknowledging the entertaining chaos. "Looks like someone's not ready to leave the fun behind," Bob quipped, a playful twinkle in his eye. Mommy chuckled, attempting to explain my theatrical display, "It's been quite the adventure today, hasn't it?" Bob nodded, sharing in the lightheartedness of the moment. "Well, they say every day at the amusement park is an adventure, no matter your age." He winked, his gaze lingering on me. "I suppose that holds true for everyone." With a final wave, we continued our march toward the exit, leaving Bob with a lingering grin. The park staff exchanged amused glances, and a few even offered encouraging smiles, recognizing the challenges of managing a spirited "toddler." As the exit gates swung open, I cast a last pouty glance over my shoulder at the receding attractions, a mix of reluctance and anticipation in my eyes. Grannies minivan awaited us in the parking lot, a cozy haven ready to transport us from the realm of fantasy back to the reality of everyday life. The distant laughter of park goers gradually faded behind us. As Mommy attempted to strap me into the car seat, my toddler-like tantrum reached new heights. I resisted with all the strength my adult-sized body could muster, making it challenging for Mommy to secure the buckles. Jack, snug in his car seat, observed the spectacle with wide-eyed fascination, his innocent gaze registering the unusual drama unfolding. "Come on, sweetie, we need to go home," Mommy cooed, her efforts to soothe me punctuated by my stubborn wails. Aunty Karen and Granny, busy packing the trunk, exchanged bemused glances but maintained their focus on the task at hand. With a final, determined effort, Mommy managed to secure the last buckle, ensuring my safety amidst the chaotic display of emotions. I sat there, pacifier dangling from my lips, a mix of frustration and exhaustion etched on my face. "Alright, little adventurer, we're all set," Mommy declared, before casting a reassuring smile at Jack, who responded with a gurgle of amusement, perhaps finding my antics entertaining. As Aunty Karen and Granny joined us, Mommy leaned against the car, shaking her head in mock exasperation. "Never a dull moment with this one," she remarked, eliciting a shared chuckle from the family. The trunk securely packed, Aunty Karen patted me on the head in a playful attempt to lighten the mood. "We've had our fill of excitement today, haven't we, Patrick?" she teased, her tone a blend of affection and amusement, closing the car door with a sense of accomplishment Granny, the ever-wise matriarch, offered a comforting pat on Mommy's shoulder. "Kids, no matter their age, always find a way to keep us on our toes," she mused, a twinkle of nostalgia in her eyes. With one last glance at the amusement park, I reluctantly settled into my seat, pacifier still in place, my tantrum slowly subsiding into a pout. The minivan's engine hummed to life, signaling the end of our whimsical adventure. As we drove away, the park's colorful lights fading in the distance In the cozy confines of the minivan, my lingering frustration began to ebb away. Mommy, ever attuned to the needs of her oversized toddler, reached into the diaper bag and retrieved a familiar sight – a baby bottle filled with a soothing concoction. The rhythmic sloshing of the liquid inside mirrored the gentle sway of the car as we journeyed back to Granny's house. "Here you go, sweetheart," Mommy said, offering the bottle with a tender smile. The sight of the familiar nipple and the comforting warmth of the beverage stirred a sense of calm within me. I hesitated for a moment, casting a glance at Jack, who was happily babbling away in his own world. The juxtaposition of the baby bottle in my hands felt strangely fitting yet undeniably surreal. As I tentatively took the bottle, Mommy's eyes lit up with encouragement. "That's it, Patrick. Sometimes, a little comfort is all we need," she whispered, her voice a soothing melody. The silicone nipple met my lips, and with each sip, a wave of tranquility washed over me. The sweetness of the liquid, combined with the rhythmic suckling, created a cocoon of serenity. The car's interior became a haven of peace, shielding me from the complexities of the world outside. Aunty Karen, glancing back from the front seat, couldn't help but chuckle. "Look at him, Susan. Our big boy finally found his peace," she remarked, her tone filled with both amusement and genuine affection. The drive continued, the familiar scenery passing by as the sun dipped below the horizon. In the gentle glow of the fading day, I sat there – a grown man in a diaper, pacifier in hand, nursing a baby bottle. As the minivan pulled into Granny's driveway, the soft hum of the engine ceased. Guided by the strong grip of Mommy, with the baby bottle still in hand, I stepped out of the minivan, pacifier dangling from my lips. “It’s an early bedtime for you, Mister” She declared while guiding me towards the house. The adventures of the day and my previous tantrum had left me groggy and unable to muster a fight. I knew that it was way too early for bedtime, even earlier than usual, but I couldn’t be bothered arguing or fighting it. The thought of being tucked in my Mommy in a warm soft bed, actually seemed like a treat at that moment and I looked forward to being sung to sleep by her soft calm voice. In the dimly lit bedroom of Granny's house, Mommy guided me towards the bed. The soft glow of the sunset worked almost as a nightlight and created a subdued atmosphere, casting a warm ambiance over the room. Despite being in my twenties, I found myself surrendering to the infantile unconventional routine. "Already wet again" Mommy announced, seemingly more to herself, as her finger passed by the by my onesie and slipped into my diaper, before she with a gentle touch, eased me back down onto the changing mat, that had been placed on the bed. The onesie, adorned with playful teddy bears and building blocks, was removed, leaving me clad only in the remnants of the day's adventures – a well-used diaper. Mommy's fingers skillfully undid the tapes with a series of delicate "POP! POP! POP!" that echoed in the room. As the used diaper was lifted away, Mommy continued her commentary in a sing-song voice, "Oh, what a messy little boy you are. Yes, you are!" The playful babytalk created an intimate atmosphere. A stack of baby wipes, scented with a subtle hint of lavender, awaited its role in the nighttime ritual. Each wipe was applied with a gentle touch, accompanied by Mommy's soothing words. "All clean and fresh now, my precious one," she cooed, her voice a comforting melody. My nighttime diaper, as always thicker and more absorbent, was unfolded with a soft crinkle of plastic. Mommy, still immersed in the babytalk narrative, ensured the snug fit of the fresh diaper, fastening the velcro tabs with maternal precision. "There we go, snug as a bug in a rug," she playfully remarked, her affectionate tone resonating with the whimsy of the moment. The onesie, now a dark blue color and adorned with nighttime designs of moons, starts and clouds, was lovingly pulled over my diapered form, completing the transformation into a bedtime-ready "toddler." With a tender kiss on my forehead, Mommy tucked me in, Mr. BunnyRabbit nestled close. “Nighty, night, Sweetheart” She whispered, gently placing a binky between my lips, before she slowly started caressing my cheek with her soft palm. As I settled into the bed, gently sucking my dummy, the voice of mommy just like the night before gently started to fill the room, the melody of a lullaby, the same as last night, calming and soothing echoed in the bedroom. She sat next to me on the edge of the bed, gently stroking my hair as she continued to sing, the volume of the voice getting lower and lower, until it was almost just a whisper. With each verse, I felt the weight of the day lift from my shoulders. The setting sun cast its gentle glow, creating a cocoon of warmth, as my eyes slowly closed and I drifted off. “Good night, my sweet baby.” Was the last words I heard, before my mind went blank.

ANIMAL HOUSE In the immortal words of Yogi Berra, Ian mused, it's deja vu all over again. But at least I'm not dealing with asswipes like Marmalard and Neidermeyer. Now, Babs and Mandy are a different story … Turning his head to the left, Ian spotted Candy sitting on one of the couches. She was delicately exploring her upper lip with the tip of her tongue, all the while staring at him, never blinking. Is Candy Mandy? Gotta be … Jee-zus, they are both so unbelievably hot! And where's Babs … er … Becky? Ian craned his neck, but he couldn't spot her. Animal House had become his new favorite film, in no small part because the asswipes all got theirs in the end, and the screw-ups scored all the hot chicks. The Nam had been full of the Douglas Neidermeyers of this world, and so many of them had been fragged by their own troops that the life expectancy of a second looey fresh off the United charter at Tan Son Nhat had been precisely sixteen days. Sixteen days! So, yeah, it's like I'm pledging a fuckin' sorority or something, and the ritual spanking lies dead ahead. What's the name of this outfit? Oh, yeah … The Circle. Oh...kay … fine … whatever … so long as it's not the friggin' Delta Tau Chi. I wonder how much they paid Kevin Bacon for the privilege of lighting up his ass? It was the same chair, sitting in the same spot in the middle of Rita's living room. The same crowd was in attendance. Only this time Ian was straddling Vicki's lap, and Sarah was just one more face in the circle of Harpies, two of whom were plainly relishing his forthcoming humiliation. And yet it was all subtly different. For one thing, Ian wasn't drunk, and he didn't like the way in which Vickie had pinned his right arm and trapped his legs between her well proportioned thighs. His shoulder was on fire, and he knew that it would only get worse if he tried to move. Vickie clearly knew what she was doing. Sarah had been all business, and his inaugural spanking had hurt like hell, but he had sensed throughout that there was no anger in her, and the conviction that she would cause him great pain but never endanger him had been overwhelming. Sarah was no sadist. He wasn't so sure about Vickie. For one thing, she was taking her time, caressing his cheeks and thighs, one languid, sensual stroke after another, the only interruption the occasional passage of her well manicured fingernails over his exposed thighs. Every cell in his body was on fire, Little Ian Junior was badly misbehaving, and all Ian wanted to do was get up, throw Vickie to the floor, tear her clothes off, stick it to her, and pound her and pound her and pound her … SMACK! Ian howled, more in surprise than in pain. SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! The pain was incandescent, four blows delivered to the exact same spot on his right cheek, three of them rapid fire. He would never have believed that a lousy spanking could hurt this bad. Vickie ran her fingernails lightly up and down his left thigh, up and down … SMACK! More fingernails, more soft caresses … SMACK! SMACK! The top of his thigh … SMACK! SMACK! The middle … Then, without warning … SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! The blows rained down on his right cheek, so close, so close to where Vicki had started. Ian screamed. He screamed so loud that he was sure some neighbor would call the police. But Donna Sumner was drowning him out, the disco beat a perverse counterpoint to his own cries. Vickie really did know what she was doing. SMACK! SMACK! Vickie was tracing lazy circles across his left cheek, which had finally attracted her attention. SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Rising and falling … rising and falling … Vickie wasn't holding back … Vickie was raining fire down upon Ian's ass and thighs, lighting them up, crimson everywhere, a few spots already turning a bit purple. Without warning, she stopped. For long moments, the only sound in the room was Ian's whimpering. A shadow crossed Ian's line of vision, what little he could see, his head dangling almost uselessly, his tongue lolling. Someone grabbed his hair, and jerked his head up. Through his tears, Ian found himself staring up into Sarah's eyes. There was no pity there … none at all. Suddenly, he was very, very frightened. . . . . Time stopped, or so it seemed. No one spoke. No one coughed. No one moved. The ritual had reached its first intermission. “Twenty-five spanks, Ian; that's all it took. Twenty-five spanks, and you are bawling like a baby. But that's okay, because you have been acting like a baby from the very beginning. And I warned you that this is what it would be like if you mouthed off, disobeyed, broke your promise to me. Now, have you had enough, or do you want more? You are coming to Houghton with me tomorrow; there will be no discussion about this. The only thing in question is how many times Vickie has to spank you before you give in. Say yes, and it's over. Say no, and you will receive another twenty-five … the price of defiance. We can do this all night, Ian, and we will. I promise you … we will.” “But yesterday …" he blubbered, "yesterday, you said that I could stay with Rita ...” “I've changed my mind, Ian-- a mother's prerogative.” She dropped his head, and looked hard at Vickie. “Let's resume.” Vickie had been absently tracing circles on Ian's now fiery red ass. Her hand paused … SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Left … SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Right … SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! She peppered Ian's thighs, then began the cycle anew. Counting to twenty-four, Vickie paused, aimed, a determined look on her face … SMACK! Ian was whimpering … he had run out of tears. . . . . “You want me to treat you like a baby, Ian; you were very clear about that.” Sarah was squatting in front of him, her hand cupping his chin, forcing him to look into her eyes. “You wanted to be helpless. Well, how does it feel, having your wish come true? How does it feel, knowing now that your mommy is very, very strict, and won't put up with your nonsense? This is your future, Ian … look into my eyes, and tell me that this is what you want-- a mommy who will discipline you every, single time that you step out of line. Happy, now?” “I don't ...” “Oh, so you don't want to be a baby, now? Is that what you're trying to say? You've changed your mind? You want to be my lover, now … my husband? Come home from work to find supper waiting on the table … grab a beer … make love to me with the booze on your breath? Sing Auld Lang Syne every New Year's eve?” “Just look at you,” she sneered; “what a pathetic excuse for a man. And where did you really get shot? Come on, Ian, tell us, because we all want to know, you being such a great, big war hero and all. How many purple hearts did they pin on your chest, how many?” “Four,” he whispered, his voice swimming up from the depths of his pain. “Four.” Sarah looked sharply at Rita, both of them instantly understanding that they had finally achieved a breakthrough. Sarah bit down hard on her emotions, willed herself not to give up ground so painfully won. “Oh, really? And just where,” she snapped, “are you keeping your little trophies, if they actually exist?” “... office,” he sighed, trying to draw breath into heaving lungs; “in my … desk … drawer ...” “Let's go home, Ian. We have a long drive ahead of us, and I'll need to pack a bag for you.” Sarah stood up, hands on hips, looking down on him-- a goddess commanding the heights of Olympus. “No.” It was all that he managed to say, but even in a whisper, one couldn't miss the conviction in his voice. Oh, shit, Rita thought. She was staring at Vickie, who in turn was staring at Sarah with one of those looks that said who the hell are you, anyway? Ian convulsed, and Vickie instantly relaxed her grip. She could feel the sobs wracking his body. But she was staring at Sarah, suddenly realizing that neither of them had derived any pleasure from this spanking at all. But Sarah had used her, turned her into a cheap prop on a movie set of her own design. Vickie wasn't feeling it, and now she knew why. Gently, she eased Ian off her lap. “I'm done here.” It was all she could manage to say. She slowly stood up, her eyes now riveted on the broken but somehow unyielding man curled up at her feet-- a completely naked man whose pain stemmed from a source hidden deep in his past, pain that he had been fleeing for years, taking refuge, like thousands of other vets, in the bottle. She was fine with catharsis, but the way Rita and Sarah were going about it sickened her to her very core. Looking down, watching him curl up into a fetal ball, it dawned on Victoria Robinson that Ian Grady mattered a very great deal to her. She just didn't know why. Pausing only to gather her things, Vickie went down the stairs to put on her boots, open the door, and step silently out into the Arctic night.

LOVELY RITA (NOT THE METER MAID) “We didn't say goodbye,” Ian astutely observed. They had crossed the bridge, forsaking the duchy of cheese for the kingdom of potholes. Minnesota, it was well known, had only two seasons-- winter, and road repair. It was winter, the potholes yawned, and the paranoid side of his nature was actively wondering whether Sarah was deliberately hitting each and every one of them on what laughingly passed for an interstate in this frozen land of 10,000 ice rinks. “More like 17,000.” Ian was kind of, sort of, thinking out loud. “What's that, baby?” Sarah's eyes were glued firmly to the road ahead. She had only busted one axle in the kingdom of potholes in ten years. She considered herself overdue, which was why she was driving her beater. The Mercedes, battery long since disconnected, was sitting out the winter in a converted barn in the far western suburbs. Like the Phoenix, it would rise from the ashes sometime in April. And poor Ian's beater is down for the count, buried in a snowbank right outside my living room window. And it's his only car. Maybe I'll get it up and running for him come Spring … Or maybe not … Sarah stole a quick glance at her boyfriend. He was plastered but, she suspected, not nearly as much as he wanted to be. Still, he had passed the test. Rita had given her a quick thumbs up, so they were good to go. I like the idea of him not having wheels. It makes him so much more dependent … THWACK!!! The right side of the car bounced hard, and more pee squirted into Ian's now well and truly soaked diaper. “Sarah,” he whined, “I need my diaper changed.” “I know, baby, I know. But you'll just have to hold on a little while longer.” Sarah had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. The six of them had variously walked and staggered out together, and Sarah and her friends had let Ian get just far enough ahead so that they could survey the damage. His pants were ruined, his baby pants having given up the fight at some point in the evening. But she did hope to save his winter coat, and she wasn't at all worried about the car seat. She had taken the necessary precautions. “I should have changed back there, at the … at the …DANGER ZONE?” His memories were getting a bit fuzzy. “DEAD ZONE,” Sarah corrected. “And we tried, baby, remember? But your changing pad is pretty small, too small to lay you out inside a Wisconsin toilet. 'Gross' doesn't even begin to cover it.” Wisconsin's bars all had toilets. The law was strict, and strictly enforced. Most of them were even inside. But they were not for the faint of heart. Sarah judged the evening so far to have gone very well. She and her friends had set him up, but it was obvious that Ian didn't suspect a thing. She had said nothing as the beer kept coming, gambling that the alcohol would get him to drop his guard. And it had. His admission, his deep-seated desire to be both her lover and her widdle baby, had been heartfelt. Ian, she now knew, was perfect for her, because Sarah harbored no illusions about her own needs. A single woman in her early thirties didn't have that luxury. She couldn't compete with a twenty year old fresh out of some nursing program, which is where the jerks went shopping when they came to the conclusion that their wives had reached their sell by date. And she most definitely did not like what she saw when she looked ten years into the future. No. Ian was perfect, or as close to perfect as she was ever likely to get. A dominant needed a submissive, not a narcissist whose ego would forever get in her way. Sarah wanted obedience, not competition, but the tricky part of it was that she also wanted a man whom she could respect. And Ian, she had concluded, fit that bill as well. No Robert Redford, but decent looking … she was particularly taken with the unruly mop that passed for the hair on his head. She was forever sweeping it out of his eyes. Not simply bright but quick on his feet, and with a wonderful sense of humor born of a genuinely jaded outlook on life. God, how he could make her laugh. She had asked him about the craziest thing that he had ever done, and what she got for her trouble was Hong Kong, in Technicolor and Panavision. The search for Suzie Wong … getting drunk and being thrown into the street … passing out … waking up in his hotel room, thanks to a kind but anonymous policeman who must have found the room key in his pocket. It was all so real, and she had believed every word of it! The next morning, she had raced to get him to his office a bit early, so that she could rush to the hospital, take over the staff room, and regale her friends with the lurid details of her new boyfriend's R&R visit to Hong Kong. Her increasingly bright-eyed colleagues had roared with laughter of their own, and in the manner of gossip mills everywhere, the story had soon climbed from her own third floor to Rita's seventh. At lunch, more and more of her friends drifted into the cafeteria from every nook and cranny of this vast, cavernous building, everyone wanting to know who the guy was, how they'd met, and the big one, of course … where was this going? Was he the One? And Sarah had held nothing back. They had met, she warned them, in the theater of the absurd, and she gave a blow by blow description of the stereo from Hell, and the puppy like eagerness with which her poor neighbor had sought to placate her. But confusion took the place of gleeful laughter when she described how she had taken him firmly by the hand and led him upstairs for an overdue diaper change. She could see it in their faces as she looked down the long table, the same doubt that had overtaken her and instantly led her to jump to the wrong conclusion. And the laughter died when she described what the military had left buried in his spine. A lot of army nurses had resigned their commissions at war's ignominious end, and they had come home to hospitals such as this, bringing with them embellished tales of the goings on at places like China Beach. They all knew the drill-- a MASH unit stabilized, but the badly wounded were taken out of theater to be reevaluated and treated in Japan, Hawaii or stateside at a facility like Walter Reed. It spoke volumes that Ian had not been scheduled for additional surgery. Unprompted, one of her friends asked if he had talked about the war, about what he had experienced in combat. Sarah sadly shook her head no, and all around the table other heads nodded in understanding. So many of them had been there, and the wall had frustrated them so many times. Sarah described Ian's apartment, the telling absence of family photos, no hint of his service to his country, and the vivid and deeply disturbing painting of the sea giving up its dead. More heads nodded, the implications stark. Without words, Sarah was asking for help, making it clear that Ian had, however unwittingly, become her responsibility. Her gaze had fallen on Rita, in reality a charge nurse in the psych ward with an advanced degree in clinical psychology. And equally unspoken, Rita had simply bobbed her head: she was there, and she would help. Sarah would not have to do this by herself. And it was to Rita Stevenson's town home in a decidedly upscale neighborhood that they were now driving. . . . . Ian opened his eyes and glanced out the window, then frowned. “This isn't the way home. Where … where are we going?” “To Rita's.” Sarah had thought long and hard about this moment. She had decided to jump on the first opportunity that presented itself, and equally to keep her response short and sweet. Ian had to learn that this wasn't a game, and that she meant it when she said that she expected obedience, and did not want it to come laced with backtalk. “But I don't want ...” “I don't care what you want,” cutting him off before he could get another word out. “This is a tradition, and you are now a part of it. We celebrate the end of another brutal week, toast the lives that we've saved, mourn the lives that we've lost, and then we go to Rita's to kick back, relax and, if you want, get more drunk. Just about anything goes … BUT YOU ARE NOT GOING TO WHINE AND CARRY ON LIKE SOME PETULANT TWO YEAR OLD, DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU ARE NOT GOING TO RUIN THIS EVENING FOR MY FRIENDS!” Sarah's voice has jumped at least two octaves. “You are in big trouble, Ian,” she said more calmly. “Big trouble. When we get home, you are going straight over my lap for a long overdue spanking. Do you want to double down and have me graduate from a hand spanking to the ping pong paddle that's in a drawer … the paddle with your name on it? We have an agreement, remember? Heh … how could you forget … IT'S NOT EVEN TWO HOURS OLD! You do not whine. You do not talk back. You obey me, and you do so without question unless you have an absolutely compelling reason to disobey. Am I getting through to you?” Ian sank deeper into the cushion, but there was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. This is not, he thought, how first dates were supposed to go. . . . . Sarah pulled up to the curb, and the first thing that Ian noticed was the sheer number of cars in the cul de sac. In fact, they had had to park so far away that Ian wasn't even sure what house was party central. The one thing he knew for certain was that he was about to set out on yet another safari in a very, very wet diaper. The prospect inspired a passing but nevertheless bizarre thought … If we're outside long enough, can a pissy diaper freeze solid? Clumsily following Rita up the road through slush that turned every outing into a muddy adventure, one alcohol inspired bit of whimsy led straight to another … How do you remove a diaper that's frozen solid to a guy's butt? With a blowtorch? Ian really, really wanted to go home. “Are you going to be a good boy for mommy?” Sarah's tone reeked of condescension, which momentarily neutralized the alcohol flowing so copiously through his blood stream. He was in big trouble … he was wet … he was shivering … and he somehow knew that he was about to become the center of attention for a gaggle of nurses who already knew far too much of his life story. What else could go wrong? . . . . “Door's open,” Rita shouted. Ian followed Sarah inside, and looked around. Cramped entryway, with stairs leading both up and down. The classic split level entry design that he had already surveyed at three dinner parties to which he had been invited by different faculty wives. Unattached professors in their early thirties were a hot commodity. Shoes everywhere, and Sarah was in the process of adding hers to the pile. “Let me help you take yours off, baby,” she whispered. “We do not want to track slush onto Rita's carpet.” Ian went to sit on the steps and get to it, but Sarah held up her hand to stop him in his tracks. “Baby, the dam has long since burst. Try not to sit down until we get you changed, because you are going to leave pee stains everywhere.” One by one, Ian lifted his feet so that Sarah could untie and remove his shoes. He felt exactly like the two year old that he was rapidly becoming. “Now remember, baby, be polite, and be attentive. And above all, be respectful. Think of the women here as your aunties, and never forget that paddles come in twos, and that Rita has the second one with your name on it somewhere in this house.” “What,” he squeaked. “Are you seriously telling me that you have given Rita permission to spank me?” “Yes.” “And the others?” “Yes. Ian, this has all been prearranged. My friends are giving me the night off. In a few minutes, one of them will be changing your diaper, and you are going to smile nicely and thank her for her kindness. And if you bitch and moan, you are going right over her lap. So, don't. Just sit back … lay back … and enjoy being the center of attention … loving attention. Think of it like a trip to a very expensive spa, where the entire staff is devoted to fulfilling your every need. Only this visit is cost-free.” “Yeah, sure, the only thing that I'm going to lose is my self-respect.” “That is strictly up to you. No one here is going to belittle you; the worst that can happen is that someone's maternal instinct runs a little wild, and you end up being openly treated like a baby. If that happens, do you think that you are going to win anyone over by going off the deep end? Why not play along? If your ego is secure, a little role-playing isn't going to rock the boat, and what you will win at the end of the evening is friends for life, a group of highly trained professional women who will become your fiercest advocates, and who will bend heaven and earth to help me keep you safe.” “Sarah, okay … all right … I'll play along, but I did not, repeat did not, sign on for this. All right, I admit it, I didn't read the fine print in our agreement. In retrospect, I was far too casual about this … it simply never occurred to me that you would go this far. You spanking me? Yeah, I guess that's reasonable … I'm good with that. But lovely Rita the meter maid? No. Candy? Yeah, maybe Candy, but look me in the eye and tell me that you are okay with Candy changing my diaper, never mind spanking me. The competition's right in your face! Are you blind?” Ian was sobering up fast, and he wasn't happy about it. “I will deal with Candy, Ian; she is not your problem. And if she wins the lottery, you will treat her with the same respect that you would anybody else.” “The lottery?” “You haven't met Vickie and Reiko yet, but you will in a few moments. You're soaked, your pants are a mess, so very, very shortly there is going to be a drawing, and the winner gets the highly dubious honor of changing you into a nice, dry diaper, plus the far more banal task of trying to figure out how to salvage the disaster zone that your overheated imagination somehow regards as decent clothing. If you want to worry about anything, worry about the very real possibility that you are going to spend the rest of the night sitting around in nothing more than a diaper and your baby pants. Oh, but if you treat Rita nicely, she may just be able to come up with a onesie in your size. I gave her your measurements, and she raided the hospital stores, so it is in your best interest to play the suck-up.” Sarah had to all but frog march Ian up the stairs. . . . . “In here,” Rita waved from the dining room. Drinks in hand, Becky, Marge and Candy were comfortably sprawled on two large sofas in the living room, a TV blaring in the background. Sarah smiled at the room in general as she soldiered on. Ian bowed slightly in Marge's direction, figuring that she was the senior of the three. Two other nurses were seated at the dining room table, one of them an Asian woman whom he reckoned to be in her mid-twenties. The other was clearly from the same brood as the four amigas. Both rose from their seats, looking to their hostess to introduce them. “Ian, I'd like you to meet the last two members of our tight little circle. This is Vickie Robinson...” “Hi, Ian.” She offered her hand, and Ian clasped it in both of his own. “It's a pleasure to meet you at last,” Ian replied, his tone warm, insincere, but hopefully convincing. Bar bait, he instantly decided. The cocktail lounges in the airport hotels along the Strip were overflowing with phony-baloney blondes, predators on the prowl for easy prey. A gainfully employed single man in his thirties needed to tread warily. A needy nerd, Vickie decided, but with a very spankable ass! “And this is Reiko Matsumura,” Rita went on, wrapping an arm around her diminutive colleague. “Konbanwa, Matsumura-san. Genkidesuka?” “O kake-sa made genkidesu,” surprise lighting up the young Japanese woman's delicate features. "Anata mo,” she politely queried in return. “Omutsu-gee,” Ian laughed while offering her a polite bow. His voice had fallen a full octave at the end, drawing out the last syllable, signaling his desire both to honor her and to be playful. Reiko clapped her hands in delight. “Ian, you speak my native language beautifully, and your accent is perfect! “Arigatou gozaimasu,” Ian again formally replied, offering her a second small bow. “Reiko, what are the two of you on about?” Rita hadn't understood a word. “Oh, we were just exchanging greetings, and when I asked Ian how he was doing, he said ...” Reiko burst out laughing. “He said that he needed his diaper changed!” Ian could hear laughter erupting all around him, laughter and the warm clapping of hands, but when he stole a quick glance at Sarah, he knew that she was appraising his performance, knowing it all to be an act. Sarah nodded her head ever so slightly, acknowledging the skillful way in which he had won over the room so effortlessly. People who could poke fun at themselves found it easy to make friends. “Well, Ian, from the looks of your slacks, I'd say that we need to get you out of your clothes, clean you up, and get you into a nice, dry diaper and a fresh pair of baby pants pronto.” Rita had given him the proverbial once-over, from head to toe. “So, take off your overcoat,and your jacket, and we'll get the draw under way.” While Ian began to disrobe, Rita fetched a bowl in which he could see several small pieces of crudely folded paper. “Everyone here except Sarah has written her first initial on a scrap of paper and dropped it into the bowl,” Rita explained, handing the bowl to Sarah. “Ian, you will draw a name, and whomever you choose will have the delightful task of changing your diaper, and the solemn task of sitting in judgment on your clothing, deciding with no right of appeal whether it shall be dispatched to the washing machine, or to the trash bin. Let the drawing begin!” Rita and her two playmates joined the others in the living room, leaving Sarah to stand in the doorway, the bowl gripped tight. Ian took his place beside her, nodded vaguely to the assembled throng, his fingers dancing among the scraps of paper, and then he slowly, slowly drew one from the bowl … opened it … “And the winner is … Ree-tah,” he loudly proclaimed into the teeth of a chorus of boos and groans. Ian frowned. He was suspicious by nature, and he really wondered. Before Sarah could retreat, he hastily reached back into the bowl and pulled out a second scrap. He opened it... “Rita,” he announced, nodding solemnly; “this lottery has been rigged!!!!” “That's right,” Rita screamed. “I go first, but everyone will get a chance to diaper the baby! We shall ply him with booze, rivers and rivers of booze, and oceans of pee will crash on the shore! The only question remaining is who shall get to clean his dirty bottom, for Sarah has assured me that, after consuming a mountain of grease at dinner, it is only a matter of time before the volcano erupts!!!” Cheers erupted all over the living room, and Ian couldn't resist. He pulled Rita roughly into his arms, pressing his soggy diaper and ruined slacks hard into her skirt, before breaking out in impromptu verse … “Lovely Rita meter maid May I inquire discreetly When are you free to take some tea with meeeee ...” More boos rocked the room, and then someone threw a paperback novel in their direction. . . . . “This is the guest bedroom,” Rita noted. She had led Ian swiftly down the hall. She had a hospital changing pad spread out on the bed, and an open but still empty diaper pail at its foot. There was a ping pong paddle hanging on the wall above the headboard. Ian gulped, and hesitantly pointed in its direction. “Is that … uh … is that what I think it is?” “I don't know, Ian; what do you think it is?” “Ah … uhm … well ...” Ian didn't know it, but he was shuffling his feet like a four year old who had just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Rita thought he looked adorable. “Uhm, Sarah said that she was going to spank me when we get home … a hand spanking, I guess because I've been mouthy. But she warned me that she would paddle me if I did anything to ruin your evening. And she … she said that you had a paddle too, and wouldn't hesitate to use it on me. Is that true?” “It is,” Rita replied simply. “And you should know that at least two of The Circle are looking forward to spanking you. They tell me that the orgasm is unbelievably intense, and I believe them.” “Vickie.” It was a statement of fact. “Yes,” Rita conceded, “but you will have to figure out the second one for yourself. On the whole, though, it's probably better that you don't know. Now, let's get you out of these nasty clothes.” Rita removed his shirt and undershirt. Both went into the diaper pail. Then she unbuckled and unzipped his trousers. Cautiously easing the soaked material over his baby pants, she knelt and, bidding him to use her shoulders for balance, got him to raise his feet so that she could free his legs. A brief glance told her that the pants were a write-off, but the socks also went into the pail. She would empty out his pockets later. Ian was now standing quietly before her, clad only in a visibly leaky diaper and vinyl pants. He remained silent as she lowered the pants, noting with satisfaction that Sarah had used the four pin method. This was why Ian was experiencing so little diaper sag. The diaper went straight into the pail, and she put her hand on his chest. A gentle push was enough to get him to sit and, without bidding, to lie back on the changing pad. The vinyl pants came next, now sliding easily down his legs. “Ian, I want you to work with me here.” He looked up at her, clearly not understanding what she meant. Rita sighed, sat down at his side, and took his hand in her own. Her grip was gentle but firm. “Ian, what do you think this party is about?” “You're blowing off steam,” he said instantly. “Yes and no. What do you think is the worst thing that can happen to a doctor or nurse?” “Losing a patient.” Too easy. “Not quite … it's losing a patient … doing irreparable harm … because we make a mistake. Fear of it haunts us, Ian, all the good people who should be in this profession-- and it's why the divorce rate is so high, and the alcoholism. A very real Sword of Damocles forever hangs over our heads.” She squeezed his hand more tightly, willing him to understand. “When you told Sarah that the MASH team chose to leave the bullet nudging your spinal cord, an alarm bell went off in her head, and when she told us, that alarm bill began ringing hospital wide. We're a family, Ian, and we look out for one another, help as best we can in the bad moments. And now you are a part of our family.” Rita was shaking her head, again willing him to understand. “Do you think that anyone here is so callous or … or, so wasted that she would spank you capriciously? Blindly? Knowing that a single misplaced stroke could put you in a wheelchair? God, Ian, don't you get it? When Sarah told us that you would need to be disciplined, we paired off in teams .. all of us … and we spanked each other! We took notes, isolated the safe swats from the dangerous, and we sat down and talked it out as a group. All of us, even Vickie, is on board. You will be punished, and the punishment will hurt … it's not a punishment if it doesn't … but you will never be in danger … never!” Ian began to cry, silent tears dropping onto his drunken cheeks. Rita gently caught them on her fingertips. “And that's why I need you to work with me now, Ian … the simple act of changing your diaper has risk, but if we work as a team, we can make the risk go away. Now, I'm going to push on your knees, help you ease them up so that you can hold them up for me. Then, I'm going to slide a fresh diaper under you, wipe you, powder you, and then we will lower your legs and I'll wipe and powder your genitals, pull your diaper up, and pin it … four pins, two at the hips and two at the thighs. Then, I'm going to pull a fresh pair of vinyl pants up your legs, but to get past your hips I will need you to lift … straight up. But under no circumstances are you to turn, however slightly, to left or right. Do you understand me?” “Yes,” he whispered. Ian took elaborate care changing his own diapers, but he had made mistakes, and every misstep had ended in a painful jolt along the sciatic nerve. He too had a Sword of Damocles hanging over his head. He never tried to hide from the fact that the jolts terrified him. “Then, let's begin,” and Rita pressed on his legs to start the process. When they were finished, Rita got a firm grip on Ian's hands and eased him up, taking extreme care not to twist his torso in the slightest. “We make a good team,” Ian offered. And they hugged. “Only because you're a good patient,” Rita smiled. “But then, you've got a good teacher.” Rita once again sat on the bed beside him. “We've got a lot of this figured out. Sending someone to your office at lunch time to change you is a piece of cake, and likewise at three … that's our shift change. The one we haven't got a handle on is mid-morning. Right now, for that one, you'll be on your own.” Ian nodded. “And now,” Rita continued, “I have a really big favor to ask you. But please, don't say yes if this is too much for you.” He studied her, the curiosity written all over his face. “Your first spanking … the one Sarah is giving you? I'd like you to receive it in the living room later tonight, with everyone watching.” “Why” was all Ian could get out. “Because, as surreal as this must sound, we all want to evaluate Sarah's performance. In clinical terms, we want to study how she responds to your cries. Will she know when it's safe to proceed, or time to back off? The only way she'll know for sure is if you are working with her … guiding her. It sounds insane, but she will be relying on you to manage your spanking. You have to work as a team, just as we worked as a team a few minutes ago. And you have to be honest, not cheat even around the edges, because the spanking cannot stop until you show genuine contrition. But more than anything else, you can't play the macho man, guide her as an act of male pride to do something that would cause lasting damage. Ian, she won't admit it, not even to herself, but she loves you … and she's fallen so hard and so fast that it's almost frightening. And you can destroy her. Don't. Don't run away from your feelings, don't hide … share everything that you feel, openly and honestly. Can you do this?” Not when I'm sober … no fucking way! "In vino veritas?” He was offering Rita a deal, this for that. “In vino veritas,” she agreed. They hugged a second time, two strangers who would never be strangers again. Rita had left a onesie on the headboard. She would finish dressing him, and then they would rejoin The Circle.

DATING IN THE DEAD ZONE Ian Grady's head was on a swivel, taking in the vast expanse of the dance floor, and the bizarre assemblage of customers and staff scattered around the perimeter. Well, Toto, he mentally shrugged, I guess we're not in Kansas anymore … In point of fact, he was in Wisconsin. Ian had never been in the navy, but he had nevertheless visited many an exotic port of call. Indeed, he was perversely proud of the fact that he had once passed out, dead drunk, in the middle of a busy road in Causeway Bay. He was ten when he had experienced his first and only crush on an actress, so it was only natural that he had taken his R&R in Hong Kong, wandering the streets in search of his beloved Suzie Wong. But he had searched in vain, finally admitting that the rumor that Suzie had absconded to Japan with Bill Holden, and that the two of them were still there and living in sin … well, it had to be true. He had drowned his sorrows in a bar, and he had only stopped drinking when he ran out of money. Management, singularly unimpressed, had rather rudely chucked him into the street, and there he had promptly passed out. It was a good memory. And now he was in THE DEAD ZONE; more to the point, Sarah had arranged for them to be seated in a lobotomized version of a classic 1950 Woody Wagon. The roof was gone. Save for the back seats, the whole of the interior had been torn out. Some madman had installed a sliding table which, in the manner of a baby's high chair, now had them neatly locked in. Ian wanted to cry. “Look over there,” Sarah whispered into his ear while busily waving at four young women sitting at a boringly regular table on the other side of the dance floor. “They work in the psych unit up on the seventh floor. Left to right, that's Becky, Rita, Candy and Marge. We owe Rita; she's the one who got me the locking mittens that you're wearing to bed at night.” Ian winced. But he had to admit that his fingernails were getting longer. “You have got to be kidding me,” he grumbled. “Do you seriously expect me to believe that your hospital employs a nurse named Candy?” Sarah allowed her professional mask to slip into place. “Yes, and we also have two orderlies named Amos and Andy.” She looked at him sternly. “Don't stereotype.” Ian loved it when Sarah went all Nurse Ratched on him. “Well,” he added in a transparent attempt to change the subject, “they must feel right at home here. I mean, it's like we've entered The Twilight Zone. Rod Serling seated us, and so far both Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin have swung by to take our order and bring us our drinks.” “But I'm holding out for Suzie Wong,” he muttered, apropos of nothing. Sarah looked at him curiously, and then casually ran her fingers over his well padded crotch. “We're across the river, Ian, in neutral territory. And the bars here are open an hour later than in Minnesota. The burgers are great, the fries house cut, and the chocolate shakes to die for.” Still running her fingers over the bulk of his diapers and sensing the smoothness of the baby pants beneath his slacks, Sarah opted to pout. “I thought that you'd like it here, but if you don't like it, we'll finish our drinks and leave. Just don't take it out on them.” She nodded at her friends across the room. “Don't worry, I'll be good.,” he laughed. “But at some point, we need to go over and say hi … you know, the whole 'hi, this is my boyfriend' routine? Nip the hospital rumor mill in the bud, so to speak.” Ian reached for his beer. This was their first real date, and he had a serious case of the heebie-jeebies, but the alcohol helped. More alcohol would help even more, he decided. “Oh, we will, we will … I guarantee you. Rita knows all about you, and I know that she's anxious to meet you.” “You told her … everything?” “Yes … and stop worrying about it,” she added in an exasperated tone. “Ian, how many times do I have to say it? We're professionals. You're my neighbor who has graduated to the exalted rank of boyfriend. You were wounded, it's left you incontinent, and you're in diapers. For the five of us, this is just another day at the office. No one here is going to question your manhood ...” Except me, she perversely thought, and I'm going to keep my mouth shut until I get a handle on why your flag's not even flying at half mast when I'm changing you ... “... so when we get together, please try and be gracious and charming. You can be, you know? Oh, you have your off moments, but for the most part you are far and away the sweetest person I've ever met. The sweetest and the most honest.” But don't get me started on your fingers and tongue! God in Heaven! You play my A-spot like a concert pianist, and how can anyone get their tongue to go where yours does on my G-spot? Talk about premature ejaculation! You get me so wound up that all you have to do is breathe on my clit and I start to come … and come … and come. And then you lick mommy clean, and it starts all over again … they should give you the patent on foreplay! Sarah could squirt with the best of them. Sarah was squirming in her seat, and Ian definitely needed another beer. His eyes wandered about the room, seeking out Janis Joplin. He hoped that the food was as good as Sarah claimed. “And besides,” Sarah went on, not realizing that Ian's attention had wandered. “I think that Rita and some of the others can help us with our little Monday through Friday problem. If I can put together a group to help me take care of you, we can take changing diapers out of your hands altogether.” Which will make masturbation a tad difficult ... Still squirming, Sarah gently but pointedly tapped the spot where she reckoned little Ian Junior was hibernating. From her point of view, one of the best things about the thick hospital diaper than Ian was now wearing was that it doubled as an effective chastity belt. Little Ian Junior wasn't going anywhere, not with the diaper as tightly pinned as a nurse with her many years of experience could make it. For his part, Big Ian was still looking for Janis, but he had changed his mind about the beer. He was going to make it a pitcher. If he had realized that Sarah was scheming to deny him the ability to masturbate, he might have ordered a keg. . . . . . . . . “Hi, Sarah,” Rita exclaimed, “it's good to see you outside the office. And you must be Ian. I'm Rita, by the way, and this is Candy. We've all heard a lot about you.” The two nurses, one a bit older and one a bit younger than his girlfriend, had taken a strategic detour on their way back from the rest room. Rita's hand was outstretched. Ian took it, and to his credit, gave it a warm but gentlemanly shake. “It's a pleasure to meet you both,” he said, “and I hope that we can get together with you and your friends (he nodded vaguely in the direction of Becky and Marge) at some point. And let me apologize for not getting up, but this table appears to be an adult version of a baby's high chair. We're locked in, I'm afraid ...” Of course, by then with any luck I'll have passed out … "... I'm okay … I mean, I think my diaper is still up to the challenge ... but I'm worried about Sarah. What if she has to go?” And that, my dear, is how you ambush the ambushers … Ian looked fondly at his girlfriend who, for her part, was looking somewhat less fondly at him. It was at this terribly awkward moment that Janis Joplin finally arrived. . . . . . . . “Thank you, Ian,” Rita said with a quiet nod. “Yes, we all know that you are incontinent, and we all appreciate how awkward this can be for you. It's not easy to talk about, and it's very gracious of you to get it out of the way like this. And we'd love to join you. As for the table ...” Rita reached underneath, found the lever, and rolled it back. “We've been here before.” Rita and Candy excused themselves, and made the long walk back to their own table. . . . . Sarah slowly shook her head. “I keep misjudging you,” she confessed. “And I apologize. I thought that you performed that little stunt to embarrass me, but you put Rita at ease. Thank you. She's a good friend, not just a colleague, and I want the two of you to be comfortable with each other.” “She's a nice lady,” Ian agreed, “and your friend Candy is hot. Can I have her phone number?” “Stop it, you big goof!” Sarah couldn't help herself-- another round of giggles was just over the horizon. “You are incorrigible … and I do need the bathroom. Don't run off …” Sarah rushed away, leaving Ian very much to his own devices. He wondered if he could persuade one of the four amigas to change his now sodden diaper. But when he stood up and looked down, much to his surprise his seat was still dry. He honestly didn't know whether to feel disappointed, or relieved. It was at this precise moment that both Jim and Janis returned, the one with their food and the other with his pitcher. The food looked good, the beer even better. He ran his hand over the cold glass, catching a bit of the foam in his fingers. He looked furtively around, and with no one watching, began delicately to lick his fingers clean. Ian was drunk, but regrettably, only a little. He sincerely hoped that the pitcher would put him out of his misery. And what the Hell is Ed Sullivan doing here? . . . . Sarah was hard at work. The cherry had somehow slipped all the way to the bottom of her shake, and she was using the mile-long spoon to nudge it to the surface. With an imaginary pat on the back for a job well done, she eased the cherry into her mouth. She bit down, swallowed, then delicately licked the spoon with the very tip of her tongue. Little Ian Junior really appreciated her well-practiced technique. Big Ian was staring fixedly at the spoon. They were both jealous. So easy, Sarah smirked, so easy. “Here we are,” she lamented, “all but inseparable for over a week now, and you keep slipping through my fingers. How can I be so wrong about you so often?” “Huh? Wrong about what?” Ian looked up from his burger, the ketchup smearing his chin. Sarah used her napkin to wipe him clean, not even aware of what she was doing. Treating Ian like a young toddler was rapidly becoming second nature to her. “I've been thinking about it … a lot.” Having taken efficient care of the ants in her pants, Sarah had come back from the bathroom in a pensive mood, and she wanted to give voice to her thoughts, and to her feelings. “When you opened the door, I attacked and you retreated. A dominant and a submissive. It seemed so self-evident. And then, when I pointed out that you needed a diaper change, you didn't react. No denial, no phony outrage, and you didn't turn beet red with embarrassment. And now … Rita. You put her instantly at ease, and you did it so smoothly. So, what I've learned over the last week is that you are really, really good at rolling with the punches … but what does it mean? Are you just humoring me? Toying with me for your own amusement? Or are you genuinely submissive? I just don't get it. I mean, you had to give me a key to your apartment, because when I lock the mittens on you at bedtime, there's no way for you even to open the door to let me in come morning. And when I change your diaper, tuck you in and offer you what amounts to an adult sized pacifier, all you do is open your mouth wide, take it in, and start sucking. Not a word of protest that every day I'm treating you more and more like an infant. Is this what you want? Are you just a big baby, and have I been cast to play the role of your mommy?” Ian nodded. He did not like where this conversation was headed, and he was still sober enough to realize that he needed to head Sarah off at the proverbial pass. “You're right, Sarah.” Ian put down his half-eaten burger. “But only half-right. When you came pounding on the door, common sense told me that this was not the hill to die on.” He reached for Sarah's hand, cradled it, and began to trace lazy circles on her palm. Sarah shivered with pleasure. Ian's touch was electric. “But I am submissive, deeply so, and I'm very comfortable with the one-sided power dynamic in our relationship. I accept that, if this is all heading somewhere, if we stay together, it will be strictly on your terms. I'm fine with that, and I'm fine with being your 'wittle baby' as you so elegantly phrased it. I love having you change my diapers, wipe my messy bottom … I love it all … the attention, the pampering. I've never experienced anything like this before, and it's addictive. You keep me safe and warm, and what can I offer you in return? The divorce cleaned me out, and it will be years before I can even think about being financially comfortable. Hell, I can't even pay for this dinner! All I can do, if you'll let me, give me the chance, is try to make you happy. And I want that chance. I want to be the man who makes love to you, but I also want to be your wittle baby. I don't care how many people think this is weird because to me it feels like, for the very first time, my life is in balance. Ian wants to be the only man in your life, but he also wants to set free his inner child because …” He paused, searching for words. “... because the only way I will ever feel absolute trust in another human being is to become a baby, your baby … trusting you to look after my every need. And the bridge between the baby and the adult is an obsession with your breasts. Gee, what a surprise! Does it seem so terribly perverted that I fantasize about you lactating, cradling me, gently guiding my lips to latch on and drink your milk? I want this relationship … badly … and for what it's worth, I think that you want it too. I just wish that you could see what I see when I'm lying there, and you're changing my diaper … the tenderness in your eyes, the caring. The bond between us is real, Sarah, real and strong and growing. And I don't want it ever to end.” “I'm glad, Ian, more than glad, because I do want this, but I also insist upon being in complete charge of this relationship. I want you to obey me, and not just because babies do what their mommies say, or they get spanked. I have to be in control because I will never knowingly do anything that is not in your best interest, which is something to which you have clearly given very little thought. If anything, your behavior is so self-destructive that ...” Sarah broke off in mid-sentence, sensing that it was far too early to take him down this path. It would take much more than a week to win his trust. “But I don't expect blind obedience,” she finished. “Stand up to me when you sincerely believe that I'm wrong, but don't ever willfully defy me. Believe me, I will know the difference, and you will not like the outcome. Do we have a deal?” “We do,” he replied, wondering all the while if it was the beer that was doing the talking, or the roughly six inches of tightly pinned and extraordinarily frustrated flesh that dangled between his legs, stubborn flesh that so clearly had a will of its own. Little Ian Junior desperately wanted to come out and play, but the damn diaper was getting in the way. And in the background, the music was louder, and a couple was dancing on stage. Ian thought that it sounded like Chuck Berry, but he wasn't quite sure. Quickie historical quiz: The music playing in the background at scene's end is Chuck Berry's A. C'est La Vie B. Teenage Wedding C. You Never Can Tell D. All of the above E. None of the above

I'm looking forward to Trunchbull getting her due soon!

Matilda couldn’t believe what she was hearing. No! No! No! “Let me see her!” She begged. Mrs. Rodgers had her by the arms, but no matter how much she threw her weight and thrashed against her, Mrs. Rodgers wouldn’t let go. “Matilda, you need to calm down!” Mrs. Rodgers said, but Matilda wasn’t having it. “They don’t know anything yet for sure!” She could barely make out the doctor standing in front of her through her tears. “We’re still running tests, but we’ll let you know as soon as we find anything. Once she’s out of radiology, and get her settled into a room, then you can see her for a few minutes before visiting hours are over.” Visiting hours! She wasn’t leaving Miss Honey here by herself! “Thank you, doctor.” Matilda felt herself get pulled back over to the chairs. “They don’t know for sure.” Mrs. Rodgers said again. “But I know!” Matilda cried. How had she not noticed the infected cuts? She had so busy looking at the scars, she hadn’t noticed the cuts! As soon as the doctor had asked if she had been around rusty metal, the realization hit her like a ton of bricks. The Chokey! The night she had been so late picking her up from Hortensia’s. “Matilda, how could you possibly know? He only said they were checking for Tetanus, it doesn’t mean she has it. He said it could be any number of things.” “B-but-but I felt it!” Matilda said. “In my throat, and she was pointing at it and-” “Shh, Matilda, you’re not making any sense. I know you’re worried, but Miss Honey is going to be fine.” “It could kill her!” “They don’t know if it was even metal that cut her. For all we know, it could be totally unrelated. They’ve already given her a booster shot just in case.” “She was late! Miss Trunchbull must have had her in the Chokey, and she got cut!” “I promise you, Miss Honey was not in the Chokey, she was with me all night.” Mrs. Rodgers said. “The Trunchbull made all the staff sit through a lecture after school let out. We walked off the grounds together. Now, Miss Honey loves to tell me how smart you are. I’m sure you know just how rare Tetanus is, don’t you?” It was true, but, Matilda had been so sure she had felt pain in her jaw. It was a classic symptom, wasn’t it? She tried to remember what she had read about it in the library after she had gotten all her vaccinations caught up. Was it Tetanus that caused jaundice, or was that Hepatitis? She let her face fall into her hands. She couldn’t remember! Her brain felt so fuzzy! Even if she was having jaw pain, why did that mean Miss Honey was too? She knew something strange was happening to her. She had been feeling all these complex and foreign things for days leading up to this, and she hadn’t understood why until today. Maybe they weren’t Matilda’s feelings at all. They had been Miss Honey’s. They had been so strong when they were lying next to each other, Matilda wondered why she hadn’t noticed before. How do you always know? Perhaps it wasn’t only Matilda who had wanted to cuddle last night? Hadn’t Miss Honey admitted she had needed it as well? The sudden urge had overwhelmed Matilda. It was as if she had needed Jenny’s affection like she needed air. Was it because Miss Honey’s complex adult emotions had overwhelmed her? The self loathing. The fear. Feelings of inadequacy, of guilt, of loneliness, of shame. How could one person feel all that? Perhaps that’s why Matilda only noticed it today? Pain was something she could pinpoint. She understood nausea, and headaches, and a full bladder. Matilda nearly jumped when she heard the door swing open. “She’s in room 408 if you’d like to come back now.” Matilda’s heart began to flutter inside her chest. She could feel the sweat forming on her palms. She had been bound and determined to break down the door a mere ten minutes ago, and now as she made her way down the hall, she felt terrified. What was this? Another foreign feeling. She was right outside the door now. She swallowed nervously. It was guilt. Matilda craned her neck around the door frame, afraid of what she might see. What if she was hooked up to a breathing tube? Or an iron lung? Was she conscious? Would she recognize Matilda, or was she delirious from fever? Relief rushed over her as she met Miss Honey’s eyes. She practically sprinted to her bedside. She was awake, and sitting up, and even eating Jello! “Matilda, no, don’t! Give her some space!” Mrs. Rodgers said from behind her. “No, she’s fine.” Jenny said with a croak. She patted the small space on the bed next to her that Matilda had already begun to scale. “C’mere, darling.” There was that longing again. Was it hers? Jenny’s? A bit of both? They wrapped their arms around each other as they rocked side to side. “I’m okay, sweetie, really. It’s all thanks to you.” “I didn’t do anything.” Matilda mumbled into Miss Honey’s shoulder. “Yes you did! You were right there by my side all day, and you were so attentive, you even noticed I wasn’t getting better and called for help. The doctor said if I hadn’t come to the hospital when I did, I could have had brain damage from the high fever.” Matilda shuddered. “I’m okay though. They were able to break it, and they’re giving me antibiotics and fluids. They just want to keep me here for observation.” “Was it from metal?” Matilda asked. She pointed at the bandage on Jenny’s collarbone. “No, it wasn’t metal.” Jenny said with a weak smile, “You want to know what it was from?” Matilda nodded, eyes wide. “It was from that darn cat your dear friend Hortensia put in the Trunchbull’s office on Tuesday. It scratched me when I picked him up to put him outside. I didn’t clean it well enough, and it got infected.” Matilda frowned, That couldn’t be it. “What else?” Matilda demanded. Jenny sighed and ran her hand through Matilda’s hair. “Can’t hide anything from you, can I? Now, I don’t want you to worry, bu- ” “Jenny! What is it?” “We have cupboard spiders.” Matilda blinked. “What? Spiders?” There it was again, the guilt. “I saw a couple the other day, but I didn’t want to scare you. I was going to go back and kill them once you fell asleep, but then I forgot about them. Looks like one of them found me last night and got me right under my jaw. I had a bad reaction, and It made my throat swell up.” Matilda looked up and noticed a bandage under her jaw line, right where Matilda had been feeling pain. She couldn’t help but laugh from relief. She hugged Jenny again, but much tighter. A spider bite? Really? “You scared me nearly to death thinking you had Tetanus!” “Why on earth would you think I had Tetanus?” “Because of the jaw pain! And the stomach contractions, and the fever!” Matilda could feel Miss Honey pull away from her and stare. “How? What? I never told you about the contractions and jaw pain.” “Because I felt it.” Matilda whispered. “I can’t explain it; I just knew.” “The bucket.” Jenny said quietly, her eyes growing wide. “It was always ready. You weren’t making it stay up the whole time?” Matilda shook her head. “Three minutes is my limit. I just sort of knew when you were going to need it and got it ready.” “Matilda, that’s not possible, how could you-” Miss Honey started to say, but stopped as she realized what she was saying. How could you tell a girl who could move objects with her mind what was and wasn’t possible? “I’m sorry, but visiting hours are over.” A male voice said. Matilda turned to stare at him and then back to Miss Honey. “C’mon, Matilda, say goodnight and let Jenny get some rest.” Mrs. Rodgers said, getting up from her chair. No! Not yet! A feeling of panic was rising in her. “Can’t I stay here with my mom?” “Don’t you want to have a sleepover with Hortensia? I’m sure the two of you can get into all sorts of fun trouble together.” Mrs Rodgers said. Matilda shook her head and looked at the nurse with pleading eyes. “You’re allowed one family member to stay, but that’s up to your mom.” he said. Matilda felt Jenny take her hand and give it a gentle squeeze. “She can stay if she likes.” Jenny said, before giving her a warm smile. “Thank you.” she whispered in Matilda’s ear before kissing her forehead. “I didn’t really want to be alone.” “I know.” ……………………………………………. Jenny was both astonished and slightly disturbed at the knowledge that Matilda had developed the ability to peek inside her mind. Well, it’s a damn good thing I don’t have a sex drive, Jenny thought to herself. She could feel her face begin to burn at the “what if,” scenario that teased her mind. Her near constant isolation from the adult world had really been a blessing in disguise. The last thing she needed to do was get “turned on” and have Matilda start asking questions about a new sensation she didn’t understand. Well, that would make two of them. She glanced at Matilda, asleep on the couch, and smiled. She was covered in a thin hospital blanket and appeared to be dead to the world. Matilda had slept through almost every time a nurse had stopped in to check her vitals, only raising her head for the briefest second when Jenny had been helped out of bed and led to the restroom. Poor thing must have been exhausted if she could stay asleep through all the beeping and commotion of the surrounding room. “Hello, Miss Jennifer, how are you feeling?’ she opened her eyes to find the nurse from before standing over her and, Jenny gulped, two uniformed police officers. What? Why? Was this about her having Matilda? Her eyes shot back to the girl as she tried her best to swallow her panic. I haven’t done anything wrong. “The pain medicine is wearing off.” she answered truthfully. She tried to give the nurse her full attention, but her eyes kept wearily shooting to the officers. “I’ll have them bring you something else for the pain, but in the meantime, these officers would like to speak to you regarding your living situation.” Jenny felt her heart drop. No! She wouldn’t let them take her! “Hello, Jennifer, is it?” Miss Honey slowly nodded her head, eyes wide in panic. “My name is Anthony Jameson, and this is my partner, Rebecca Hastings. We have a few questions for you, we were hoping you wouldn’t mind answering for us.” Miss Honey cringed a bit. His voice was loud and carried in the quiet hospital room. She put her fingers to her lips and pointed at the covered lump on the couch. “Ah, sorry,” He said, before lowering his voice. “We received a call tonight regarding a possible domestic abuse situation, and we’re just here doing a wellness check.” Hiss Honey stared at him for a moment in confusion. Domestic abuse? She wasn’t even, or had ever, been in a relationship. “N-no?” Jenny answered. If this wasn’t about them taking Matilda, then what was it about? “I’m a bit confused, sorry.” “It’s okay. There was some concern raised over the marks on your body. We were called to make sure that you and your child were in a safe situation and offer some assistance if needed.” “O-oh, oh no,” Jenny said in a relieved sigh, “Those aren’t from a partner.” “Yes, the caller said something about a family member, your aunt? Or your boss?” Miss Honey’s face fell. “N-no, those, those are from my childhood.” She stuttered out. “I-ts nothing, just an accident.” “Don’t lie.” Jenny heard coming from the side. She paled as Matilda sat up. “That’s no accident! The Trunchbull did that to you!” “Matilda, please.” Jenny said in a panic. She turned back to the officers. “Everything’s fine, really, it’s from a long time ago and-” “Ma’m, is this person still in your life?” “Well, yes, she’s my boss at the school, but like I said, it was a long time ago.” Jenny said, her voice rising with panic with every syllable. Jenny could see the female officer scowl. “You’re not talking about Agatha Trunchbull from that school over on Churchill street, are you?” “Umm, y-yes.” “We’ve had multiple reports and complaints about her over the years and-” “Then why hasn’t anyone done anything?!” Matilda nearly shouted. Everyone turned to look at her. “She terrorizes everyone! She hurts the kids, throws people out of windows! I saw her throw a girl over the fence by her hair, and she’s stolen all of Jenny’s money!” Jenny could see tears running down Matilda’s face. “All the adults are cowards! Why won’t anyone do anything?” Jenny could see the female officer's shoulders slump. “We get reports, but when it’s time to press charges, we think she gets to them first. Either bribes or threatens them to stay silent. It’s not as easy as it sounds, unfortunately, facing the ones who hurt us.” The officer met Jenny’s eyes and nodded in understanding, but that seemed to make Matilda even more furious. “That’s what I mean, though!” Matilda said, “Everyone is so scared to face her, so they do nothing! And that’s why it keeps happening! Again and again! She knows she can get away with it! If even one person had stopped thinking about themselves and stood up, then maybe the person after would have been spared!” The female officer gently placed a hand on Matilda’s head. “You’re a very smart little girl.” “Which brings us to our visit.” The other officer said. He produced a piece of paper and a pen and set it on the tray in front of Jenny. “We need your help, please give us your statement. It starts with one person.” Miss Honey let out a choked sob. “I-I can’t. I’m sorry, but I can’t!” ………………………………………………………. Matilda sank into the couch in stunned silence. Why? Why? Why? Why? She felt like she had just been punched in the gut. The adults are cowards. Every. Single. One. Of. Them. They were Hortensia’s words, and she had been silently fighting against them for days. Miss Honey was different! Miss Honey would protect them. Miss Honey loved her. Miss Honey was…Miss Honey was…just like the rest of them. No! No! No! No! “Please,” the male officer said, sliding his card on the table. ”Think about it and call us if you change your mind.” Jennifer said nothing. “Hey,” Matilda heard. She looked up and saw the female officer looking down at her. “Don’t be hard on your mom. It’s not easy, you understand?” Matilda could feel the terror and helplessness coming from Jenny, but it was held back with her own rage, frustration, and, hurt? There was a deep ache inside of Matilda. She didn’t want to give it a name, because if she did, she would have to face the fact that Jenny, her Jenny, was making her feel…betrayed. Silent tears streamed down her face. “You’ll understand when you’re older.” You know it's more complicated than that. Life wasn't a story where everything always worked out in the end. There was no hero to swoop in to save the day. Reality wasn't a book where everyone got a happy ending, and good triumphed over evil. It was time to face the facts; she had been living in a fantasy world. Why had she assumed a woman as beaten down and broken as Jenny could somehow face all her fears just for her? Matilda was angry, not at Jenny really, but at herself. When had she lost touch with reality? Matilda sat silently on the couch and watched the officers go. Once the room had emptied, and it was just the two of them alone again, Matilda felt the full force of Miss Honey's emotions. It was as if all the air had been sucked from the room. It hurt to breathe. Matilda looked down at her hands and found them trembling. She looked up at the woman who sat on the bed with her head in her arms on the tray, sobbing. Matilda couldn't stay mad, Jenny was filled with enough self loathing for the both of them. Matilda climbed back up onto her bed, squeezing in between the tray and Jenny. "I'm sorry, Matilda, I'm so sorry!" Miss Honey choked out. "How did I ever think I could be someone you could rely on?" "It doesn't change anything." Matilda said. She was relieved to find it felt true. "I still love you," she said, before adding, "mom." Matilda blinked in surprise. Mom? Miss Honey hadn't looked up, but she could tell she had stopped crying. "Why now? When I feel like the furthest thing from it." Matilda herself was trying to understand it. Why now of all times did it suddenly feel natural? "Because I think before, it felt too much like a fairy tale. Like I would wake up one day and find myself back with the Wormwoods. You were perfect, and everything I had ever wanted, and I think I knew deep down it wasn't real. I feel like I'm seeing you for the first time as a human." "This is the real me, Matilda. A selfish, lowly coward." Matilda put her arms around Jenny and rested her head in the crook of her neck and shoulder. "I still choose you, mom." She felt a pair of arms slowly wrap around her. There, in the seemingly endless darkness and turmoil, she could feel the tiniest spark of hope ignite, like a lighthouse that had stood empty for years had finally been lit, signaling the way home. Matilda didn't know who was the lighthouse and who was the ship lost at sea, but she could feel the storm ever so slowly begin to ebb away, and for now, that was all that mattered. "I love you so much, Matilda." "I love you too, mom." And as Matilda drifted to sleep in her favorite place of all, a thought crept into her mind. She smiled mischievously in the dark. Spiders, huh? I wonder how Miss Trunchbull feels about spiders.

I woke Friday morning thinking it was Saturday, until I realized that the meeting reminder on my phone was prompting me that I had my weekly staff update meeting to call into in 15 minutes. Uhg. The chain holding my wrists had released at some point, but the sleeper was still locked. I knocked on my wife’s closed office door and stuck my head in when invited. She was on the phone, and gestured that I should take the changing pad and diaper stack sitting on the chair beside her and lay it out on the floor. Continuing her discussion with her coworker about resource needs and schedule changes to some program, she unlocked the sleeper and changed me into a dry diaper. Wearing only the diaper and plastic pants, I was handed the pile of wet diapers and shoo’d out. I dropped them in the wash, made a quick cup of coffee, threw on a onesie and some sweatpants, and called into my meeting to begin yet another day of work. Throughout the day I was still doing my best to be conscious about when I emptied my bladder. I noticed that I was trying to not walk near the bathroom door. It just felt wrong. Several times I went to use the toilet, but when I got near the bathroom I just didn’t feel like it. The diaper was easier. Of course, I was consciously using the diaper, so it stayed in control. After focusing on my work for most of the day, it was mid-afternoon when my wife asked if I wanted to go out shopping with her. I gestured at the thick white plastic covered lump around my waist. “No. Not like this.” “It’s OK. I’ll put a more discreet diaper on you, and you can wait in the car. C’mon it will be good to get out.” I sighed. She returned with a Molicare M2, which after she changed me into it seemed as thin as a pair of regular underwear after the pillow-like cloth I had been wearing. Under the snapped onesie, it was hardly noticeable. Manipulating her phone, she unlocked the collar and cuffs, a tiny click signalling that I could pull them off. I dressed in a pair of loose shorts and an untucked shirt over the onesie. I doubted anyone could tell. With the confidence of a discrete diaper, I joined her in the grocery store, relaxing a little with the realization that I could get out of the house without a problem. I hadn’t even realized that I had felt trapped in the house before, and I felt a wave of gratitude to my wife for convincing me to get out. It was the right thing. We were in the produce area when my wife glanced at her phone, then somewhat discreetly cupped my crotch. I was wet. Really wet. Without mentioning it, we both sped up the remaining shopping. Time to get home. After checkout, as we were passing the restrooms, she looked at me. “You should change here. I brought a spare for you.” Realizing just how wet I was, I agreed with her. I poked my head into the mens room and found it empty. Perfect. Not as perfect was when she pulled the translucent plastic grocery containing another diaper, a package of wipes, and a small bottle of powder out of her huge purse, and just handed it to me. I looked around again frantically, but no one seemed to be interested, or care. Quickly tucking it under my arm I entered the room and quickly went into a stall. The change went quickly... drop my shorts, unsnap the onesie, and pop the tapes on the used diaper. Pull it off, pull out a couple of wipes, and clean up a little. As I was cleaning, a few drops of pee fell from the trainer and landed on my shorts. I guess I should have positioned the new diaper to catch the drops... note that for next time. Pull the new one on, sprinkle a little powder, position and tape, snap the onesie up and pull up my shorts. Of course, just as I was finishing up the door opened, and someone walked over to the urinal. I quickly wrapped up the used diaper, and walked out of the stall, discreetly dropping the used diaper in the trash with a ‘thunk’ on the way to the sink. Wash my hands, and I was out of there. I had survived. I let out my breath as I exited the restroom. “You’re getting pretty quick at that,” she said as we continued out the front door and walked to the car. “It’s not so bad, is it?” She gestured towards the wet spot on my shorts. “I guess that’s why I’m changing you, though, isn’t it? When you do it, you make a mess...” I agreed that it wasn’t that bad, but really, I still intended to win the bet. I once again wondered about that, though, as I knew I was already wet when we got home. Not soaked, but the yellow lines were slowly turning blue. I redoubled my efforts to be conscious about it when I was letting go, and it wasn’t long before I was again being changed into one of the thick cloth diapers and plastic pants. She prepared dinner and wine, and afterwards we pulled up a favorite movie that we hadn’t seen in awhile. The cuddling on the couch got frisky, but when she had undressed me down to my diaper, she stopped. I tried to keep things going. She “Let’s go take a shower... you’re kind of smelly, and it’s not exactly a turn on.” She was dressed in only a black bra and panties, and I followed like a lovesick puppy dog as she pulled me upstairs to the shower. I put the collar and cuffs on myself, and our fooling around continued as she washed me in the shower. Free of the trainer, my excitement was obvious, and the restraints only helped to heighten it as I tried to hold her perfect breasts, always kept slightly out of my reach. After toweling us off, she laid out the changing pad and diapers for me on the bed. I did my best to nibble her ear, her shoulder, and anything else I could until she finally turned around, kissed me deeply, and pulled me over onto the waiting cloth. I barely noticed as the tether clicked on as her breasts dangled in front of me. As she slid up and down on me, she laughed as I tried to sit up, to reach her, to hold her. She bent over, her mouth by my ear, and whispered how it was nice to be in control occasionally. Not of everything, just a few things. How it made her feel important to me. How she knew that diapers were important to me, and now she was part of that. How it excited her that someone depended on her. How she didn’t want all the power in the relationship, just a little. How her control of my diapers was just enough. How I looked cute with a puffy butt. How much she loved me. And then, remarkably simultaneously, it was over. We lay there for a little, with her in my arms, still inside her. After a few minutes, she got up and wiped herself off using my diaper, and the pulled it up and pinned it into place after replacing the trainer. Quietly, gently, the plastic pants were pulled up, the cloth diaper tucked in all around, and the sleeper zipped and locked. The cuffs and collar remained, as a reminder of whining about them last night. I said nothing. She gently guided me to my bed, and lay down with me as I fell asleep. ----- That night I slept very, very well, and woke up Saturday morning feeling refreshed. The diaper was very wet, as usual, and the collar and cuffs were still on. I found my wife in her office, scrolling though some data. She turned. “Just checking to see how you’ve been doing, and tweaking the algorithms a little. Only one more day to win this bet!” She smiled at me. “Let’s get you cleaned up”. She unlocked all the clothing, and let me use the bathroom. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t want to go in there. The need to take care of #2, though, overcame the bad feeling, and I suffered through a few minutes to take care of business. I got up and left as soon as I could. Today was household chores day, and we had a bunch of work both inside and outside to attend to. I asked her for a more discreet diaper so I could work outside. Soon I was in a single layer cloth diaper, and after breakfast I proceeded to mow the lawn, trim the bushes, do some garage cleanout, and all the other basic chores that needed to get done. The hard work in the sun made me thirsty, which in turn meant that the thin cloth did not last nearly as long as the thicker diapers, of course, and I needed to stop for a change every one or two hours. Several times I tried to use the bathroom, but it just didn’t seem right, and I changed myself, or was changed, on the couch or the bed. By the time dinner time rolled around we were both exhausted, but the chores were done. We decided to go back to our favorite pub, and after the shower ritual I was re-diapered in an discreet disposable, dressed in fresh clothes, and very very ready for a beer. Halfway through the meal I was unsuprised when the bag that she handed me contained only two thick M4 diapers, but numbed to the humiliation after a week of diapers and two beers the change went uneventfully. My shorts bulged slightly, but the untucked shirt, dark room, and the onesie seemed to provide enough discretion. The used diaper landed in the trash with a thunk as I walked out after washing my hands. There was some good live music going on, and so we hung around for a little while listening and talking. The third and fourth beer made the walk home a little more challenging, but it wasn’t until I got home that I realized just how wet I was, and that the back of my shorts were wet. The diaper had leaked. I tried to get upset at my wife, after all, she was responsible for my diapers! She was supposed to keep my from leaking! What if others had seen? My actual mumblings, though, went largely un-commented on as she helped me in to bed after laying out some dry cloth diapers. I took off my clothes, and lay back and rested as the cuffs, collars, and chains were attached. I barely was conscious as the heavy disposable was removed and the doubled night diaper was pinned on, followed by the plastic pants and the sleeper. The chain between the wrist cuffs and collar was again left in place. As my wife was kissing me goodnight, I had a blurry realization that I hadn’t gotten a punishment shock in a long time. What if it was broken and she used this as an excuse to prolong the training? I didn’t want this to last any longer than it had to. “Honey?” “Yes darling.” “I think the battery in the trainer is dead. I don’t think it’s working.” Her brow furrowed, and she looked at her phone. “Why don’t you think it’s working?” “It hasn’t shocked me recently.” She played with her phone some more, and looked at me sweetly. “No, it’s working just fine, honey. Don’t worry about it. I love you.” Her hand went down, and rubbed the front of my diaper a little. In my inebriated state I just closed my eyes and enjoyed it, quickly passing into sleep. ====== Sunday morning was the big day. Time to see who won the bet. The fact that I was waking up with a very soggy diaper was not a good start. My wrists were still chained to my collar, so I waddled down the hall. I found my wife was still sleeping. I headed down the stairs to try to start coffee. The cartridge based coffee maker was easy to operate even with hands like a tyrannosaurus, and soon I had two cups of coffee. Adding the milk was a little harder, but I managed. Carefully climbing the stairs with two precariously carried cups of coffee, I earned a warm smile as I presented it to my just-waking wife. She propped herself up on one arm to receive the warm gift. “So I suppose you want out? You still think you can win this bet?” Her warm smile was a rewarding thank-you. “Yep, I do. I’ve been practicing the last few days, and I think I’ll be fine.” “All-right.” She reached for her phone charging by the bedside, and twiddled a bunch of settings, entered passwords, and soon there were a few small clicks as all the devices unlocked. “Why don’t you go take a shower and clean up, and I’ll join you?” I couldn’t say no to that. It would be the first time in a week I could wash myself. Soon the water was hot, I had stripped everything off including the trainer, and she was joining me as I opened the door and stepped in. I enjoyed the ability to wash myself, and we both took turns soaping, touching, caressing, and holding each other. It wasn’t long before my excitedness became the main attraction, and I lifted her up and on to me. We stood locked together for a few seconds before I heard her whispering in my ear. She was grinding gently. “Remember the terms of the bet. To win, no more than one accident over the next 48 hours. And if you put on a diaper because you think you’ll have an accident, you lose. Right?” “Right. And if I win you’re going to be the one in diapers for TWO weeks.” I smiled at the thought, as remote a possibility as it was. “And if you lose, you’re going to be put back in the trainer for a while until it’s permanent. But I’m feeling REALLY good right now, and I’m so confident that I’m going to win that I’ll let you have two accidents before you lose.” She was grinding harder. “Because you let me pick what we were going to do today.” She ground even harder, and I was up against the shower wall, huffing and puffing myself. She clenched, reaching climax, as she whispered in my ear, “We’re going to go see my parents.” I stopped cold, any thoughts of my finishing completely gone. “What?” She looked up at me, basking in both the afterglow and the knowledge that she had me. “Since we didn’t go out with our friends yesterday, you said I could pick where we went today. And I want to go see my parents. That was the deal.” It was the deal. She was right. But this was wrong. “You want to expose this to your parents? What will they think? They’ll never talk to me again!” I was starting to freak out a little. I turned the shower off and got out, wrapping myself in the safety of the large fluffy towel. “Hey, you said you were going to win this. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine, right? You think you can win this, right? Don’t worry about it.” “But what if I have an accident?” She had transitioned into her soothing, calm-me-down voice. “You can win this. You can do this, right? And if there is a problem, we’ll just blame it on a temporary medical problem that the doctors haven’t figured out yet, but I’m sure they will soon.” I was calming down. I could do this. “No one can get mad at you for having a medical problem, right? And you’re going to win it anyway.” I could do this. I was going to win this. I found out that she had set up brunch plans for an hour from now, so we finished getting ready. I was very conscious of holding my bladder, and I went to the toilet every 10 minutes, even though I hated going into the bathroom. It just felt wrong. Her parents only lived 20 minutes away, and I have rarely concentrated on one thing for so long. Hold my bladder. Hold my bladder. Hold my bladder. Do not lose focus. Any conversation my wife attempted to start I ignored, and after a few minutes she stopped trying, with a smirk on her face. Hold my bladder. Hold my bladder. I could do it. Hold my bladder. I had never before been so grateful to pull into my in-law’s driveway. I made a beeline for the guest bathroom to drain the few drops that had accumulated since I left home. When I went again 10 minutes later, just as the mimosas were being distributed, my mother in law looked at me curiously. When I went for a third time just 15 minutes after that, brunch was being laid out on the table and I felt her eyes on my back. The fourth time, in the middle of eating, I saw my wife and mother in law whispering when I returned, stopping suddenly when they saw me. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what they were talking about, but what was I going to do? I was very worried that if I didn’t go often, I’d end up having an accident. That was, I was sure, worse than being talked about. ==== I almost made it. I was so close. We were starting to make our excuses about the busy day we had ahead of us. It was probably the second mimosa that did it. Damn alcohol. I was sitting on the couch when my wife’s eyes went wide, staring at my crotch. I froze. I could feel it releasing, and as much as I tried I couldn’t clench. Luckily, there was not much there, and the damage was limited to a very obvious wet spot. “Oh, honey, I’m so sorry!” My wife said rushing to my side. She guided my shocked self quickly into the bathroom, leaving my in-laws staring in shock behind me. I was almost in tears. I had just peed myself in front of my in-laws. I sat down on the tub and my wife sat beside me. “It’s OK. I already told my mother that you were having some problems, which is why you’ve been running to the bathroom so often.” “But I just wet my pants in front of them.” I had a thought. “Urm... did you bring anything I can change into?” She paused. “No, I didn’t. I’ll get something from my father. Let me have your wet stuff and I’ll do a quick wash and dry.” Running a load of wash would take a while, and I just wanted to get home. “Let’s just go. Please. I’ve had enough.” There was a gentle knock on the door. My wife went to answer it, and I heard her and her mother talking in hushed tones just outside the door. Not so hushed, though, that I couldn’t hear parts of the conversation. “...didn’t realize it was so serious... ...just have to get him to the car and get home...” “...seeing a doctor... very embarrassed...” “...from your grandfather... in the garage... be OK...” “...I’ll ask...” My wife came back in, closing the door behind her. She looked at me. “My mother would like me to ask you if you’d like something to wear home.” She paused. “There’s still a pile of stuff from when my grandfather passed away in the garage. There are some Depends. I told her you wouldn’t want to use that.” I didn’t even reply. I just looked at her. Was she crazy? There was no way in Hell I was going to wear her grandfathers Depends. It didn’t look like she expected me to agree, and she handed me a hairdryer from the closet before she went outside to talk to her mother again. I pulled off my shorts, and a minute under the hot blast from the dryer removed the wet spot. After I replaced my shorts, I replaced the hairdryer in the closet. “... get a pad for the seat...” “... I’ll be right back.” Her mother was just leaving as I opened the door. She looked back by reflex, but quickly turned back around and headed for the garage. My wife was waiting. “I’ve already said goodbye, let’s just head for the car. My mother is going to get a something to protect the car seat. Just in case.” She took my hand, and lead my embarrassed and numb self to the front door. Her father was nowhere to be found, and we quickly exited to the car. Her mother was already there, placing a disposable chair pad on the car seat. I assumed it was from the garage, but I didn’t ask. A half-used bag was on the ground, and she picked it up and placed it in the back seat. The big hug from my mother-in-law was unexpected. She’s not normally the touchy-feely-huggy type. She looked me in the eyes. “I’m sorry that you’re having problems, but it’s OK. You’ll make it through it. You’re still young, so just do what you need to do to figure out what’s wrong, and everything will be OK.” She glanced over at my wife, and lowered her voice to where only I could hear it. “You know, it’s not the end of the world if you have to wear a little protection against dribbles now and then. You’re not the only one in the world that has had problems, you know.” My mother-in-law smiled at me. “Just take care of yourself, OK?” She gave me a hug, and I mumbled something thanking her for breakfast and sorry about the excitement and everything as I slumped into the passenger seat on top of the disposable chair pad. The drive home was quiet, and I concentrated on not having a second accident. When we arrived home, I went and took a shower, alone, to try to rid myself of some of the dirty feelings I felt. I had wet my pants. In front of the in-laws. And I only had one strike left. I went into my office to find some peace, but only found a long list of bugs from work that had been assigned to me. I just didn’t want to deal with that on the weekend, particularly this weekend. Even the tech websites that I browsed for a break weren’t interesting. After 15 minutes I started toward the bathroom, but I almost decided that I didn’t need to go. I just felt wrong walking by the open bathroom door. I forced myself to go inside and let out the few drops that had accumulated. Every 15 minutes I did the same, for the whole afternoon. For dinner, I had only water, and kept the fluids to a minimum. I was looking forward to sleeping in the same bed with my wife, but she begged off with a headache and I found myself back in the guest bed with the plastic mattress cover, “You know, just in case...” The diaper pail was still there, and I opened the window to allow the room to air out a little more. I read for a while, and turned out the light. I hadn’t lost yet, but I was down one strike and barely 12 hours into the test.