Bettypooh

I think you're in for a treat To many of us disposables are more babyish and the feel is certainly quite different. Plus they're a lot more convenient. I've almost stopped wearing cloth diapers, maybe twice a year now when I want some special treatment or something to cheer me up if I'm feeling bad. Waiting impatiently to hear about your experiences Bettypooh

Laughed so hard I peed myself, not that I mind it Bettypooh

Arrrgh Matey. Needs some piratey stuff it do. Maybe a picture of Blackbeard in diapers It does look nice really Bettypooh

Thanks for this While I knew of the effects, I didn't know these exact causes. I avoid dehydration but sometimes it's needing a nearly constant water intake to keep up with what I perspire away, and I can definitely feel and see the effects of a loss of hydration within a couple hours time on hot summer days. Muscles begin aching when they shouldn't, endurance goes away, and so does the mind Oddly enough I might not even feel thirsty but I know what I must do so I just go ahead and drink something anyway. I still think it's funny that my normally wet diaper is usually the only dry part of me on those sweltering days; with so much bad in life I'll take whatever humor I can find to make it better! Bettypooh

My bladder issues are nerve-related and life-long, mostly exhibited as spasms and urge incontinence with OAB. But in mid-life I was able to avoid accidents except when I fell asleep drunk. In my mid 40's my control abilities began slipping away and I started wearing pads. By my late 40's they weren't enough and I started wearing diapers. I've always had some DL tendencies but had never really explored them so both kind of came along together. Knowing what my issues were I didn't feel a need to see a Doctor over this directly, but I have done huge research online and I've actually deeply interacted with 2 Doctors online over this, so other than a physical examination in-person there's nothing more to be done for me. I guess I should note here that I have no fears of prostate cancer etc or of death in general, so I feel I've done enough already and I won't be going to a Doctor over this alone, but I do highly recommend that for you and anyone else who might see life and death differently than I do. Especially for males, there's a chance that your bladder control issues emanate from something which could be life-threatening and you need to address such as that early when there's a far better chance of successful treatment. Chances are that the Doctors can do little or nothing for your leakage directly, but some treatments do help some people. If that's your lot in life then accept it, do what you have to do, and get on with life. Being DL can make that easier to deal with, but in the actual needing you can expect some of the excitement to wear off- maybe all of it. So maybe just take the path I did and try to enjoy what you can of wearing and not spend so much time focused on the need, since you can't change that part anyway once it happens. Wearing diapers beats the heck out of having visible accidents and/or worrying about them. Bettypooh

That is a question I've wrestled with and my answer is still "I don't know but I'm willing to try". I've met a few intersexed people who lived a 'male' life with a vagina being predominant but having few other 'female' physical characteristics, and they all seemed to be tortured and traumatized by that to at least some degree. Of course that is something they'd lived with and was known by at least some family members and friends which could explain their hurting. I've always wished that I could have talked with them at more length and depth, but the situations kind of precluded such as that. Like you mentioned, I want a world without gender restrictions where nobody thought twice of a man wearing a dress with a bouffant or a crewcut, with or without breasts, and with everyone simply being who they felt like ATM. If that were to happen then I think everyone would find their way through life much more easily and quickly, as there would be no repercussions over difference such as we have now. I can actually see this happening eventually if we stupid humans don't destroy ourselves in toto first. In myself, I was and am attracted to both what are seen as predominantly male and female interests, and I've always been like this. What hurt me most is my being pushed into a maleness I did not want along with being denied a chance to express any feminine aspects until late in life, and even now I deal with that almost daily. We're simply not allowed to be who we are, and it may not be from the causes it seems to be on the surface. A lot of this is from those towards the ends of the gender spectrum who feel like they will lose something if there is any allowance for what lies in between; they want binary gender exclusivity for selfish reasons. They are letting negative things drive them instead of positive ones, and that is all too commonplace today (and probably has always occurred). Even before coming here this morning, I thought about walking to the store wearing a dress. I'd really love to do that, even with no other things about me appearing to be on the feminine end of the gender spectrum. But the world restricts me with no valid reason for it- they are totally wrong but it's me who has to suffer from the wrongness instead of them, and they think this is proper and correct. They would lose nothing in me doing that but they don't want me to do it anyway. All I can conclude is that the ones who truly need psychiatric and psychotherapy assistance are the ones who think they don't need it. And that is the vast majority of humankind... Bettypooh

I don't think "most" is appropriate here, or even "many". I know most positively that I took it in it's full context. I both like being a different sort and like wearing diapers for their own sake, as well as the convenience of not not needing to go pee when I don't want that interruption. To me it's totally practical and logical as well as secure and pleasant. I'm not sure I'd feel this way now without the long experience I have of wearing diapers but I can't rule out that it would have happened anyway. Bettypooh

I'm showing my age here but as a child darn near everyone watched Walter Cronkite do the newscast on national TV. Occasionally he would do a bit more in commenting on things with his personal opinion. One night at the end of his broadcast he mentioned that he'd heard from people of the news always being about bad things. He said this was true, but to consider that "news" is only about the unusual and uncommon, not the regular events which weren't really "news" at all, so that if the bad things he reported on were uncommon, that meant that the good things were the common ones, and that there were a lot of good things going on whether he mentioned them or not. The good exists but you've got to look for it yourself- nobody is going to bring it to you. And don't forget that you can create goodness yourself. I used to hate dealing with the unhappy crabby people at the drive-through windows or fast-food places. It occurred to me that probably all they ever saw were crabby complaining customers which would explain that. I decided I was going to change my experience by trying to change theirs. I gave them a warm smile, said "Thank You" with meaning, and when I could I'd say something nice about them or show concern if they seemed to be having a really bad day. I was always positive with and to them, nothing negative ever. Now my going to the drive-thru is often a highlight of my day with honest smiling, joking, and happiness all round. It's nice to make their day for them, but best of all is that I'm getting so much good from it, and it took so little to do it. So even when it's hard to do, go give someone a smile and some happiness and you'll find that when it's returned you will be getting more from it than you gave because there's still more good than bad going on, you just sometimes have to take the first step in looking for it before it's all revealed to you Bettypooh

I have to disagree with babykeiff because I am one of those who thirsts for knowledge even with things I play no part in, or have no desire to do. I simply like to understand everything as best I can, which I find allows me to see everything else more clearly too. While every Mod or Admin can operate here, I do most of the Mod work in this forum. My approach has been from the start to first protect the Medically Incontinent from harm or bashing as this forum DOES belong to them, and second to not disallow relevant conversation which is not being complained about by the people whom this forum belongs to. If I receive such a complaint or have dealt with a similar issue in the past I will most certainly act on the behalf of the Medically Incontinent when such acts benefit them; that's my job here. Anyone with a complaint or who wishes to discuss how I function here is most welcome to PM me and I will respond to you ASAP. If we can't reach a satisfactory resolution then I recommend you take the matter up with the site owner DailyDi. It is my intent to leave this discussion going until such time that it requires my official attention, so let's not argue the point here where it's going to adversely affect everyone.. Bettypooh

When they perform an autopsy on me, they'll be wondering how it was possible for me to have lived as long as I have. Like an artist, I'll become famous (at least in the Medical arena) but only after I'm dead Bettypooh

My OAB didn't exactly relate like this, but I did discover that when I felt 'loopy' and sometimes almost passed out (especially in the summer heat or when ill), it was being caused by a drop in my blood pressure. I just happened to be at my Doctor's getting my vital signs checked by a Nurse when I had one of my 'spells' and she couldn't get a pressure reading. She checked the equipment, I started feeling better, she rechecked me and I was back to normal. I am both hypootensive (low blood pressure) and hypoglycemic (low blood sugar) but not dangerously so, and treatment isn't needed but I do have to be careful when I feel like I may 'pass out', which so far has never quite happened. I also perspire like you'd never believe in the heat so in the summer I'm always chasing hydration to keep up.I see no difference in my 'spells' whether I'm hydrated or not, but I feel it physically in every other way. My family has a moderate history of low blood pressure and diabetes, but I'm the only one who perspires like I do. It's almost funny that when it's 11 AM and I'm working in the heat, my diaper is the only dry part of my clothing I do have a food 'sensitivity'- not quite an allergy but does make me physically sick- which I am able to avoid. Again it doesn't affect my 'spells' either way. We're complex beings and with me (and possibly you) symptoms can be from a number of causes, and sometimes may be from a specific combination of things. Either through memory or the use of a written journal you should note what you've eaten, drank, and done in specifics for the last 24 hours when you experience odd problems like this. Then by changing one factor at a time to see if it improves later on. Take note of any improvement and maintain what apparently brought that on, then keep going with the changing of one thing till you've found the likely source of your problems and the best resolution you're able to get on your own. Test your results by reintroducing what you have altered one thig at a time to see if it really does make a difference. By this method you can almost always find at least some improvement, or at least know what to expect when you do certain things. And most certainly you need to have your Doctor involved with all of this for advice, monitoring, and to help prevent you from doing something which may be detrimental to you. It can be a long process but eventually you should find all the improvement you can get, or worst-case-scenario find what your body needs direct medical treatment for. Bettypooh

Preferences and reality don't coincide so my vote for thickness may not be realistic, but it's what I'd truly prefer. If I were financially independent I'd be so thickly diapered that it would be hard to miss but I wouldn't be pushy about it in other visible ways. I've no desire to offend or shock anyone but I despise what is seen as "normality" in society and I like making people think for themselves instead of feeling obligated to comply with what others want them to be like. In reality I'm far more practical so I aim to be discreet simply because that's an easier path to travel on Bettypooh

I'd suppose there is something online about this, probably an official site you could research on. Most countries do not want immigrants who will be a burden on their system, but rather want productive people who will help build their economy, so according to your abilities you might get a response either way. I don't see that as being discriminatory, but rather as being protective of a countries limited resources so that their own people can have better lives, which is what anyone would want from their own country. Were it not for the northern latitudes being colder I think I could live quite happily in Canada. But cold is a hard line with me which is why I live in the southern US where cold isn't bad and doesn't last too long. The tiny amount of time I spent there and with online interactions and observations since then has led me to truly admire Canadians who mostly seem to be kind, caring, unpretentious, and polite people who would be the kind of folks you'd want for a next-door-neighbor Of course there are exceptions, but I've seen fewer of those then with most other places. The US could learn a lot from them but that will never happen, and more's the pity for that Bettypooh

TBH there was a time where I might have wanted out of the game, but not now And not ever Bettypooh

Most of the laundromat's here won't let you dry clothes there which you washed elsewhere. Sometimes it's just signs on the wall, sometimes an attendant on duty, sometimes cameras monitoring and someone dropping in asking you to leave Their excuse is always that they want to be sure dryers are available to customers who use their washers, which makes sense when the place is busy but sometimes it ain't and you'll get asked to leave anyway. Some folks are as... well they just ain't nice Bettypooh

Whether by nature or nurture, the amount of urine output is the same; the difference is in how it's released. That will vary with the form of incontinence and with other factors like body position and urethra layout. My best friend had a urethra like a spaghetti strand which needed surgical correction, and most guys will 'kink' their urethra when sitting then when they stand it releases what it was holding. But in general terms, incontinence is usually a slow constant leakage or something close to that which keeps the bladder empty so there's nothing to flood. Betypooh

I act professionally in my business and I expect the same from anyone I'm doing business with. A lack of timely response is unprofessional. It takes almost no effort to acknowledge receipt of a message and to reply that you are not able to respond fully but that you will do that ASAP. Never promise what you aren't going to deliver On the journey to whatever form of incontinence you prefer, just relax and be patient. In time almost everyone can reach their goal, and those who can't are often impairing it by forcing the matter instead of just letting it happen. I always think of incontinence being the more natural state of the body, with there being no need to retain since you're in diapers. Just let it go and in time it will do that all by itself Bettypooh

I can understand Rusty's 'academic' interest in this. He's well-explained his own story on DD many times over My distant brother recently had surgery that left him with no urinary control, and related to me of his using a 'sheath' cath and bag, as he couldn't use an indwelling type. He was having problems as night being a restless sleeper so I discussed my own issues with him and recommended something better than the institutional pull-ups his doctor had recommended. He hasn't mentioned anything since then save that he still needs the bag, which he's comfortable with. He did mention it was kind of convenient to not have to stop what you're doing to go pee sometimes I didn't relate my whole situation, omitting the DL parts, but I did discuss my loss of control and how I handle it with diapers. I also have a sister who wears pads, partly due to effects from her hysterectomy and partly due to her aging. She's somewhat open with that, but doesn't seem very comfortable discussing it. Bettypooh

I have at best ten seconds between becoming aware and having an uncontrollable stream emerging. Sometimes it's less. At home I try to get to the bathroom since I wear pull-ups here, and I use them like training pants. Elsewhere I just let it go as there's no stopping it so there's no point in trying. When I was able to wear real diapers constantly I never tried to retain anything so the urges were few and far between which I was happy about since I spent half my life fearing and fighting them. They're not as bad as they once were but I still have no idea of what quantity will emerge Bettypooh

My earliest memory is something like a snapshot of me standing in the living room wearing Training pants. I somehow know I was smiling and that Mom was there somewhere behind me, but she's not in the 'pic' I have. I do remember that we had that same big console TV set in later memories which is why I'm certain it's a real memory. It's the only diaper-type memory I have and I can't say when or where it was at since we moved several times when I was really young. Bettypooh

Side-sleeping pretty much equals leaks for most folks. Wearing cloth-lined plastic panties over a disposable seems to be the best fix short of going for all-cloth. No matter what your preferences and habits, bed protection is wise since the only certainty with using diapers is that sooner or later you're going to have leaks. Bettypooh

An adult-sized playground would be nice Bettypooh

On leaks, they don't happen with a properly-fitting diaper until it's soaked. It sounds to me like you should try different lower taping techniques and see if that helps. I've worn several different style diapers which had more capacity then my preferred Moli's that leaked long before my Moli's (and Tena's) would which is why I think that fit matters most with capacity second to that SAP's don't absorb quickly, only thoroughly, so you need the waterproof fit to give them time to work. Even with my laissez-faire attitude toward leaks I'd still rather avoid them. In time leaks will get noticed by someone who you might not wish were the one discovering them Sleep is a gray area where you can be semi-awake without realizing it as long as nothing triggers a fuller waking. I drift between knowing I'm awake just before the stream begins to being more awake before realizing I need to pee then instantly letting go and relaxing back to sleep instantly, sometimes not being awake when the stream finishes. And once in awhile I wake to discover I'm soaked with no memory of that whatsoever I don't place any value on any of that as long as my waking is no more than momentary, because more than that ruins my good night's sleep The most important part of any of this is to be happy with whatever is happening, even if you want to go further. If you're happy and relaxed your journey will be faster and easier Bettypooh

For many years all I had was a folding clothes drying rack that I hung a small fan onto one side. Regular clothes took about 12-24 hours to dry and 6X2 diaper squares of Birdseye took 36-48 hours to dry. Without the fan times doubled. Drying went a lot faster when I put the rack over a forced-air home heating vent (which I don't have now). The little box fan was cheap, and cost almost nothing in power. Now I have a real electric dryer and it adds about 15% to my power bill The same diapers take about 1 1/2 hours to dry in it. It's nice having a dryer but I can do without Bettypooh

My tummy protrudes way too much now What I've had to do is to fold the outer cover inside down to the padding in front to keep the diaper from sagging in the middle. You can do that in the rear as well. It makes a world of difference in fit Bettypooh