Sissy Room

CHAPTER 11  First Snow and First Kiss The first morning in Tallinn had begun gray. The company apartment on the third floor of a modern apartment building was smaller than Aino had imagined, but stylishly furnished and decorated. At one end of the living room was a light-colored sofa, at the other a small dining table that could comfortably seat only two people. The bedroom was so narrow that only about half a meter of walking space remained between the bed and the wall, and in the kitchenette, two people would have had to constantly move around each other. Aino hadn't come to Tallinn to live spaciously, though. She had come to serve her sentence. The first night went surprisingly well — exhausted Aino fell asleep right after her Pets play on the floor, from which she crawled into bed only in the early morning hours to continue her dreams. Although the transfer to Tallinn felt inhumane, Aino had at least been given a few days off to settle in. It was unpaid, but it was time off nonetheless. By the afternoon, most of her belongings had found their places. Books and notebooks stood in a straight row on the low shelf in the living room, clothes rested neatly arranged in the wardrobe, and natural cosmetics and dental care items had been placed in the bathroom medicine cabinet. Two packs of diapers had been left on the bedroom floor. Aino had already tried fitting them into the wardrobe and the bathroom cabinet, but neither was large enough. She decided to deal with it later. The apartment didn't feel like home, but it did seem like a place where Aino could imagine spending at least a few months. She stopped by the living room window and looked outside. The sky had been gray all day, but now its shade had turned slightly lighter. Aino first noticed a single snowflake that landed against the windowpane and melted into invisibility immediately. A moment later came a second, a third, and a tenth, until the landscape began to fill with slowly falling snowflakes. The first snow. It soon covered the roofs of cars parked along the street and made the park across the way look instantly more beautiful than it had just minutes earlier. Aino stood watching the snowfall for a long time. Was Helsinki already covered in snow too? The vibration of her phone pulled Aino back to the present moment. She assumed it was the building manager or property manager — no one else had called in weeks. Aino startled when she glanced at the phone screen, which displayed Elisa's name. She answered immediately. "Hello." "Hello." Elisa's voice sounded surprisingly cheerful. "How are you?" "Fine, I guess." "That didn't sound very convincing." "Maybe it wasn't." There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment. "Could you come down to the front door?" Aino frowned. "The front door? I'm in Tallinn already, you know." "I know." Elisa chuckled and then hung up completely unexpectedly. Aino was confused. She quickly put on her coat, shoved her keys into her pocket, and descended the stairs to ground level at such a pace that her Achilles tendons ached. Aino pushed the heavy outer door open with both hands and felt the swirling snowflakes on her face. Elisa stood a couple of meters from the door in a dark wool coat, a purple suitcase beside her. In one hand she held a paper coffee cup, its steam rising into the cold air as a thin, curling ribbon. Aino stood staring at her without saying a word. Elisa smiled. "Hello." "...what are you doing here?" "I'm taking my winter vacation now." "Now?" "Now." Aino blinked a few times; a lone snowflake caught on her eyelashes. "But..." "I thought," Elisa said, lifting her suitcase slightly closer to herself, "that someone should help you settle in here." "You drove all the way here..." "I came by ferry." "Right... of course." Elisa laughed quietly and then politely asked if Aino would invite her inside. Aino nodded slowly, but her gaze still hadn't left Elisa. Snowflakes clung to Elisa's dark hair and the shoulders of her wool coat, but she didn't seem to notice them at all. Aino stood in place for so long that Elisa had time to smile at her a second time. *** The next two days passed in surprisingly ordinary ways. Elisa, who slept on the pull-out sofa in the living room, woke up before Aino each morning and had time to brew coffee and set the table before quiet footsteps began to sound from the bedroom. Aino enjoyed the slow mornings — she removed her wet diaper in the bathroom and lingered for a long time in the warm shower. After her shower, she arrived at a ready breakfast table; Elisa prepared delicious fresh porridge and chopped vegetables and fruits into large copper-colored bowls. During the days, they wandered around the city without any grand plans. They found the nearest pharmacy, walked through peaceful parks, and discovered a well-stocked grocery store in the basement of a shopping center. There, Aino stopped to carefully examine almost every shelf's contents, as the product names were unfamiliar to her. Elisa walked calmly beside her, waited patiently, and spoke only when Aino asked something. At the checkout, Aino began arranging her purchases on the belt in neat color order. Red products formed one row, green ones another, and so on. Elisa watched this with bemusement from a couple of steps away; the rainbow of groceries forming on the belt amused her. "Is there some logic to that?" Aino nodded seriously. "Yes. This way they fit in the bag better." Elisa looked at the purchases again and tried for a moment to understand Aino's logic, but eventually decided to let it be. She pulled out her bank card before Aino had even opened her wallet. "I can pay." "You don't have to," Aino said quickly. "I know." Elisa paid for the groceries anyway. Aino insisted on packing the purchases herself, but she allowed Elisa to carry the grocery bags to the apartment. The weather had warmed enough that the snow on the ground had turned to slush; Aino slipped once on the sidewalk but got up so quickly that her pants barely got wet. The walk to the apartment was about a kilometer. Elisa's swimming hobby had strengthened her arms, but she was still relieved when they finally arrived at the familiar apartment building's yard. Elisa prepared salmon and roasted vegetables for dinner. Aino sat on the sofa reading an old novel she had bought from a flea market. The book wasn't particularly interesting, but its slow pace and calm atmosphere did Aino's rattled mind good. Elisa assembled the portions onto plates, lit an onion-shaped candle, and called Aino to eat. The food tasted heavenly — the salmon was perfectly seasoned with salt and lemon, and the side dishes had no faults either. Conversation flowed easily between the women, but as their plates emptied, Aino gradually grew quieter. Eventually, only a lettuce leaf and a couple of fish bones remained on her plate, which Aino moved back and forth with her fork. "Can I ask you something?" Aino asked carefully, her facial muscles tense and shoulders high. "Go ahead." "Did you also face consequences for opposing Juhani?" Elisa felt an uncomfortable lurch in her stomach. She took a sip of water, set her glass down slowly on the table, and only then answered. "No." Aino paused for a moment, let her gaze wander across her own palms, but then quickly lifted her face. "Why not?" "Do you think it would have been better if I had been punished too?" Elisa delivered her counter-question calmly, but there was an edge in her voice that Aino hadn't heard once in Tallinn. That voice belonged to the Elisa that Mikko had warned her about on her very first day of work. "No," Aino finally answered thoughtfully. "Good." After that, neither of them continued the conversation. Aino rose from the table, quietly wished good night, and retreated to the bedroom without saying anything more. Even her evening routine went undone. When the bedroom door had closed, the apartment fell almost completely silent. Despite the conflict, Aino fell asleep quickly — her last days of work in Finland had been so stressful that a massive sleep debt had accumulated. Elisa was left alone in the living room. She gathered the plates from the table, washed them carefully, and wiped the kitchen surfaces with a neon-yellow dishcloth. While cleaning, she constantly shifted her weight from one foot to the other and hummed half-audible melodies generated by her mind. She only relaxed when she turned off the lights in the kitchenette and noticed a pale blue shirt on the armrest of the living room sofa. Aino had worn it earlier in the day around the city but had changed into a thinner t-shirt upon arriving home. Elisa bent down, picked up the shirt, and carefully brought it close to her face. She filled her lungs with Aino's characteristic scent, which was pleasantly slightly spicy. Elisa sniffed the shirt for a moment until she realized what she was doing and moved the fabric away from her reddening face. She remained standing for a moment with the shirt in her hands, stroking the soft fabric with her fingertips as if smoothing out non-existent wrinkles. A momentary image rose in her mind — an overhead view of the conference room where Aino sat alone receiving the punishment Juhani had imposed. Elisa knew she should have been there. Aino hadn't revealed her to Juhani, even though Elisa had led her into the plan. Elisa closed her eyes and managed to stop a nascent tear. She folded the shirt carefully and placed it on the back of the chair to await the next morning. Only after that did she unfold the sofa bed, make herself a bed, and turn off the stylish designer lamp that had adorned the ceiling. ***** The next morning, the previous day's conversation didn't come up again. The weather had warmed even further, melting the slush into water that now glittered on the sun-warmed asphalt. Aino and Elisa prepared brunch in honor of Aino's last day off and set out around noon for a walk without a specific destination. Or rather, they did have a destination — Elisa wanted to visit the swimming hall — but they allowed four hours for a two-kilometer journey. Aino liked that they didn't have to rush anywhere. They walked along the cobblestone streets of the old town, occasionally ducking into small boutiques, and continued on their way until the crowds thinned and the streets grew quieter. Aino had been unusually talkative all morning. She had managed to keep Juhani out of their conversations for a few days, but today she couldn't help herself. "That call lasted maybe seven minutes. Or six and a half. I didn't even hear all of it. But those real estate deals definitely weren't just real estate deals. The extra money was definitely passed on somewhere. I just don't know where. But if he really is doing something illegal, he must be pretty nervous." "Maybe." "Or maybe he's not nervous at all. That might actually be even more worrying." Elisa smiled to herself and noticed that Aino had unconsciously drawn closer to her as they walked. The sleeves of their coats almost touched if they took steps in the same rhythm. "It was so nerve-wracking hiding in that print room. I was absolutely sure I'd cough or start laughing in panic and get caught. I've honestly thought about that call maybe a hundred times..." "I can tell." "If the building was deliberately overpaid for, then..." "Aino." "Yeah?" "Did you ask me out for a walk just so you could ask about Juhani?" Aino stopped. She seemed to genuinely think about the question for a few seconds. Elisa raised her eyebrows and stopped beside her friend at the edge of an empty side street. "Well... well, why did you come to Tallinn yourself?" "I already told you. I wanted to see how you're doing." Aino shook her head and took a small step toward Elisa. "People don't usually travel to another country just to see how someone's doing." "Don't they?" "They don't." "Well, why do they travel, then?" Aino looked her in the eyes, completely serious, and then opened her mouth with a small sigh. "Usually people follow someone to another country only if they really, really want sex." Elisa couldn't hold back her laughter — Aino's comment came from completely out of left field. "How on earth does your brain make conclusions like that?" "Statistically it seems pretty plausible." "Statistically?" "Yeah." Elisa shook her head, smiling. "I didn't come for that." "But..." Elisa added after a moment, in a quieter voice than usual, "the thought doesn't feel entirely foreign either." Aino turned her gaze toward the roadside embankment; she hadn't been prepared for an answer like that. "Well in that case, you should probably date someone other than a diaper girl like me," Aino laughed shyly and tried to hide part of her blushing face inside her coat. "It doesn't bother me that you wear diapers." Aino lifted her gaze and whispered in a trembling voice: "Oh..." They stood facing each other for a moment without saying anything. "It doesn't bother me either that you don't wear diapers," Aino finally continued in a slightly more confident voice, making Elisa burst out laughing again. The wind blew Aino's hair across her face, and Elisa instinctively raised her hand to push a few strands aside. Her fingers lingered for a moment on Aino's cheek. Aino wasn't breathing — she couldn't breathe. Elisa's fingertips were cool, but they burned against her skin. The whole world seemed to stop in that moment. The distant hum of traffic, the gurgle of water in the gutter, and the barking from the nearby dog park all disappeared. "Elisa..." Aino whispered, not knowing herself whether it was a question or an answer. Elisa didn't say anything. She leaned forward slowly and pressed her lips to Aino's — gently, almost asking. Aino responded at first with equal gentleness, but suddenly something released inside her. She pulled Elisa close fervently, as if she had been waiting for this her whole life, and sucked a couple of times on her upper lip and tongue. Elisa's arms wrapped tightly around Aino; Aino's fingers found their way into Elisa's wavy hair. Neither of them wanted to stop — the kiss deepened and their touch grew increasingly passionate. Aino's knees felt weak; her diaper was already completely wet, and this time it wasn't because of pee. A passing car honked at them, but neither of them cared. The only thing Aino cared about was Elisa's mouth against her own.   ****** Aino pressed the apartment door shut behind her and kicked her shoes into the corner of the entryway. The sun was setting behind the city's silhouette, painting the sky orange, but Aino didn't see it. She saw only the bed, the pillow, and the white sheets. Aino hurriedly took off her pants, almost tearing them off her legs. The legs got stuck around her ankles for a moment; Aino stumbled but didn't fall. When her legs were finally free, Aino jumped onto her bed on her back and pushed her hand inside her diaper. The thick diaper was still damp from the kiss. Aino closed her eyes and let her fingers wander straight to her clitoris. She didn't have the patience to savor it slowly, nor did she try to be quiet — in that kind of heat, she just had to let go. Aino pleasured herself fervently, almost furiously. She relived Elisa's kiss as she touched herself, imagining those skilled fingers on her clitoris. "Aihh," Aino moaned out loud as her approaching orgasm began to make her body tremble uncontrollably. The pleasure lasted a long time; Aino managed to slow down a few times to prolong her ecstasy somewhat. Finally, she increased the pressure of her fingers, and the fiery orgasm reached its peak, spreading waves of pleasure through her entire body. Aino climaxed with loud moaning in her bed and felt pee begin to flow into her diaper as soon as the waves of orgasm subsided. At the same time, a few kilometers away, Elisa stood focused on the edge of the diving board. She took one deep breath, took a few quick steps, and launched herself. The somersault in the air was clean, almost perfect — her body curled into a tight ball before she hit the water like an arrow. The pool swallowed her for a moment until she surfaced with soaking wet hair and sparkling eyes. Elisa began to swim. She did somersaults in the water, dove and rose, turned around underwater like a dolphin. Her movements were joyful, like dancing in the water. Finally, she settled onto her back to float and stared at the building's dark glass ceiling with an incredulous smile on her face. "Oh, Aino," she whispered softly and licked her wet lips.

Chapter 9 – My Baby Girlfriend I didn’t see Samantha for the rest of the week as she had other commitments. However, Christina allowed me half an hour on my phone each day to text her. She had agreed to come over at the weekend to meet my mother. I was feeling nervous and hoped that my mother would like her. - I woke up Saturday morning feeling super excited. Today was the day that I would see my new girlfriend again. I eagerly sat up in my crib and waited for Christina to let me out. After a few minutes the door opened. However, it was my mother who walked in. ‘Morning little guy’, she beamed. ‘Hi Mummy’, I giggled, ‘I didn’t think that you were coming until later’. ‘I wanted to come early and spend as much time with my gorgeous baby as possible’, she smiled, ‘it smells as if I came in at just the right time as well’. I wasn’t sure what she meant until I shifted around in the crib and felt the familiar gooey mess in the seat of my nappy. I had reached a point now where I could barely even tell if I had used my nappy or not and was now not only completely reliable on nappies but also on my mother and Christina to check them. After a surprisingly quick change, we headed downstairs for breakfast. I sat in my highchair with a bib around my neck and waited for my cereal. However, my mother came over and placed a bowl of what looked like porridge in front of me. ‘What’s this?’ I asked. ‘It’s creamy porridge’, replied my mother, ‘this was another one of your favourites when you were a baby’. I looked over at the counter and saw the empty jar of baby food. ‘Why am I eating baby food again?’ I questioned. ‘It makes a change from cereal’, smiled my mother, ‘besides, there’s nothing wrong with having a little bit of baby food in your diet. It’ll help you to have softer bowel movements as well’. She then proceeded to scoop up a spoonful of the porridge and brought it to my lips. I accepted it and prepared myself for the taste. To my surprise, it actually tasted pretty good and didn’t seem much different to normal porridge. ‘Nice?’ asked my mother. ‘Yummy’, I replied. ‘Good boy’, my mother cooed before scooping another spoonful into my mouth. The two types of baby food that I had tried didn’t taste too bad. In fact, it tasted nicer than I’d expected. I was almost looking forward to tasting some other baby food in the future. - After breakfast, I was showered and dressed for the day. I had a t-shirt and shorts on which usually meant that we were heading out somewhere. Not long after I came downstairs, there was a knock at the door. I waited eagerly as Christina walked over and answered the door. Standing in the doorway was Samantha who was looking absolutely stunning. She had a yellow dress on which was a lot longer than the one from a few days ago. Christina welcomed Samantha in who immediately came over and wrapped her arms around me. ‘Hi boyfriend’, she giggled. ‘Hi girlfriend’, I replied whilst grinning. ‘You must be Samantha’, said my mother who walked over to greet her. ‘I am indeed’, Samantha smiled, ‘nice to meet you’. ‘Nice to meet you too’, my mother replied, ‘Jake has told me lots about you’. ‘All good I hope’, Samantha said. ‘Of course’, I chimed in. Samantha let out a loud yawn. ‘I’m sorry’, she apologised, ‘I didn’t sleep very well last night’. ‘That’s alright’, replied my mother, ‘you can always have a nap later if you need one’. Christina came over to join in the conversation. ‘Shall we tell them the surprise?’ she asked my mother. ‘What surprise?’ I asked. ‘We thought we’d take you kids out for a milkshake’, smiled my mother. ‘That sounds lovely’, Samantha smiled. ‘Woo hoo’ I cheered, ‘I love milkshakes’. Christina turned to Samantha with a more serious look on her face. ‘Samantha sweetie’, she said, ‘we were just wondering if you would like some extra protection for our trip?’ ‘Extra protection?’ Samantha asked curiously. I rolled my eyes and thought I’d move the conversation straight to the point. ‘Did you want to wear a nappy for our trip out?’ I said. Samantha’s eyes widened as she stared at my mother looking a bit embarrassed. ‘It’s ok dear’, smiled my mother, ‘Christina has told me about everything that you guys have been getting up to’. Samantha blushed before turning back to Christina. ‘You mean…wear a nappy…outdoors?’, she asked looking rather concerned. ‘Don’t worry’, said Christina, ‘I promise that no one will even know that you’re wearing one. ‘It’s not as bad as you think’, I added as I now had plenty of experience being diapered outdoors. ‘You promise that no one will know?’ Samantha asked. ‘We promise’, replied my mother. Christina held out her hand which Samantha nervously took hold of. As the two of them disappeared upstairs, my mother turned to me. ‘She seems lovely’, said my mother. ‘Yeah she sure is’, I replied, ‘I’m in love with her’. ‘I can see why’, my mother smiled, ‘she’s adorable’. ‘I’m so happy that you like her’, I said. ‘I think she’s perfect for you’, my mother replied before giggling, ‘I always wanted to have a baby girl’ I laughed and put my shoes on. Eventually, Samantha and Christina returned. I looked at Samantha who had once again had her hair put into pigtails. I couldn’t tell that she was wearing a nappy. I sensed that she chose to wear a longer dress for a reason. ‘Okay kids’, cheered Christina, ‘let’s go’. - It was only a short car journey to the café but it was long enough for Samantha to begin feeling nervous about being out in public in her diapered state. I held her hand and smiled at her. ‘It’s going to be alright’, I whispered, ‘I’m right here with you’. She squeezed my hand a little tighter and smiled back at me. When we got out of the car, my mother immediately put my changing bag over her shoulder before holding onto my hand. To Samantha’s surprise, Christina took hold of her hand as if she was a toddler and the four of us headed inside. We quickly found a table and sat down. Samantha sat next to me whilst my mother and Christina sat opposite. A waitress came over to take our order. ‘Hi guys’, she beamed, ‘what can I get for you today?’ ‘Could I have a large strawberry milkshake please?’ replied my mother. ‘Ooh I’ll have one of those as well’ added Christina. As the waitress turned to me, I smiled, ‘can I have a chocolate milkshake please?’ ‘Of course you can’, replied the waitress, ‘is that a large?’ ‘He’ll have a medium one thank you’, my mother interrupted. Finally, the waitress turned her attention to Samantha who was playing with her hair awkwardly. ‘Can I…erm…can I get…erm a medium banana milkshake?’ asked nervously. ‘Don’t forget your manners sweetie’, Christina told her. ‘Please’, Samantha added. ‘Not a problem’, replied the waitress, ‘I’ll go and grab them for you now’. As she left, Samantha let out a sigh of relief. Despite her nappy being hidden, I could sense that she was very self-conscious about it. I turned to my mother. ‘Why can’t I have a large milkshake?’ I protested. ‘I know what you’re like with your wet accidents’, replied my mother, ‘the last thing we need is a leaky nappy’. I didn’t have a reply to that. As my mother and Christina started chatting, I turned to Samantha. ‘Are you ok?’ I asked her. ‘I’m so nervous’, she admitted, ‘somebody is bound to see my nappy. I shouldn’t have agreed to wear one’. ‘It’s fine’, I assured her, ‘I’m sat right next to you and I can’t even tell that you’re wearing one’. She didn’t reply but seemed a little bit more at ease. Finally, our milkshakes arrived. ‘Enjoy your shakes’, smiled the waitress, ‘let me know if you need anything’. After she had left, the four of us began to drink our milkshakes. It felt very strange using a straw as I had grown accustomed to drinking from a baby bottle. Samantha on the other hand didn’t seem to have any issue. She was happily slurping away on her milkshake. ‘Samantha sweetheart’, Christina said, ‘don’t slurp your drink, it’s not good manners’. ‘Sorry’, Samantha said and started blushing like a little girl who had just been told off. The four of us were soon enjoying our milkshakes. Just as I drank the last of my milkshake, I felt a familiar warmth inside my nappy. I sighed as I sat there and wet myself. ‘Everything alright?’ my mother asked as she noticed the expression on my face. I didn’t reply and sat there awkwardly. ‘Do you need changing?’ my mother asked. I nodded my head whilst trying to avoid eye contact with Samantha. ‘Good job you only had a medium milkshake’, my mother giggled before turning to Christina, ‘I won’t be long’. With that, my mother and I stood up and left the table. The waitress suddenly walked past us. ‘Excuse me’, my mother called out. ‘Can I help you?’ the waitress smiled. ‘Where are the baby changing facilities?’ my mother asked. I felt myself blushing with embarrassment and wanted the ground to swallow me up. ‘There just through those doors’, replied the waitress pointing to the far end of the café. As we walked away, I noticed the waitress looking down at my shorts suspiciously. I ignored her and followed my mother to the changing room. When we entered the room, there were two changing tables next to each other. ‘Take your pick’, said my mother. I awkwardly picked one before allowing my mother to pull down my shorts and help me lie down on the changing table. As my mother starting to change my nappy, adulthood felt miles away. Laying there having my nappy changed like a baby not only seemed natural but it also felt like the life that I wanted to have. My train of thought was interrupted when the changing room door opened. To my surprise, Christina walked in holding Samantha’s hand. ‘Room for one more?’ smiled Christina. ‘Ooh dear’, replied my mother, ‘do we have another wet bum to change?’ ‘Afraid so’, giggled Christina, ‘this one certainly knows how to soak her nappy’. Samantha started blushing once again as she was lifted onto the changing table next to me. As Chrstina lifted up Samantha’s dress to reveal her nappy, I instantly looked away to respect Samantha’s privacy. However, when my mother started sprinkling my genitals with baby powder, I smiled as I heard Samantha’s nappy being ripped open before Christina reached over to grab a baby wipe. There was something surreal about me and my girlfriend having our nappies changed together but I knew right then that she was the one for me. We remained silent as my mother and Christina finished changing our nappies before helping us off of the changing tables. With my shorts pulled up and Samantha’s dress pulled back down, we were ready to leave. After leaving the changing rooms, we walked over to pay for our milkshakes. The waitress looked at me and Samantha before glancing at Christina and my mother. ‘Did you find the changing room alright? she asked. ‘Yes, thank you’, replied my mother, ‘we just had to sort a little accident out’. ‘Oh dear’, said the waitress, ‘I hope everything was ok’. ‘It was fine’, answered Christina, ‘I think these two probably just drank a bit too much milkshake’. Samantha and I both stared at the floor with embarrassment. After paying, we left the café. ‘That was so embarrassing’, Samantha whispered to me. ‘You kind of get used to it’, I replied, ‘I can’t believe you actually wet yourself though’. ‘I wasn’t sure what else to do’, admitted Samantha, ‘I just assumed I was meant to use my nappy’. ‘Well, at least it’s over now and we can go home’, I smiled. As we got into the car, Christina handed us both a dummy each. I instantly put mine in and started sucking on it. Samantha looked a little nervous for a second before putting the dummy into her mouth. ‘Good girl’, whispered Christina. We set off on the journey back home. I stared out of the window and watched the world pass by as I reflected on the events of the day so far. I was having a lot of fun and felt sad that I had to go back to work on Monday. As I looked over at Samantha, I saw that her sleepless night had finally caught up with her. I smiled as she sat there fast asleep sucking on her dummy. With her hair in pigtails and the dummy in her mouth, she looked no older than a toddler. I grinned when I realised that the cute toddler sitting next to me was my new girlfriend.

CHAPTER 10: Crime and Punishment --- Aino didn't know how long she had been sitting alone in the dim conference room when the door finally opened with a faint creak. The first to enter was HR-Majatta, carrying a laptop, who positioned herself at the head of the table with a precise and expressionless demeanor. Behind her came Mikko, whose face bore the weight of heavy exhaustion. He greeted Aino with a silent nod but didn't smile. Last to enter was Juhani. The man closed the door calmly, straightened his dark suit jacket, and sat down in his chair as if it had been just any ordinary meeting. No one spoke for a moment, until Marjatta finally opened her mouth. "Aino," she began in a calm but more formal tone than usual. "This discussion is being held due to the events that took place during the board meeting." Aino nodded slowly. "I understand." Marjatta glanced quickly at Juhani and then continued. "You presented very serious accusations against the CEO to the board. The accusations turned out to be unfounded and caused significant harm to the team." Aino lowered her gaze to the table. "I am truly sorry." Silence fell over the room once again. Juhani didn't say a word; he let Marjatta continue. "We all make mistakes at work," Marjatta said in a slightly softer voice. "But in this case, it wasn't a human error. You essentially tried to prove to the board that the CEO is not fit for his position." Aino closed her eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry." Mikko leaned melancholically against the table and looked at Aino for a long time. There was no anger in his gaze, rather incredulous disappointment. "Aino…" "…I know you. Or at least I thought I did. You're not the kind of person who would single-handedly devise a plan like this against your manager. That's why I need to ask you one more time…" The room fell silent for a few fleeting seconds. "Did you really act alone?" Aino felt her pulse quicken and her senses sharpen. Elisa's face flashed through her mind like lightning in an autumn storm. She heard the woman's gentle voice in her thoughts, remembered her confident yet tender touch on her skin. Elisa wasn't here. Aino knew what she had to answer. "Yes," Aino whispered. "I acted alone." Mikko didn't look away from her. "Are you absolutely sure?" "I am." This time the answer came a little faster. "No one else had anything to do with this." Mikko slowly leaned back. He closed his eyes for a moment and rubbed his head tiredly. "In that case," he finally said, "we are forced to conclude that you have seriously violated the company's internal policies and management's trust." Aino nodded; she didn't try to defend herself in any way. "And it's not just about the board meeting," Marjatta continued. "You have used your working hours for activities that are harmful to our company. The CEO will decide on the disciplinary consequences." Marjatta turned her gaze to Juhani, who nodded almost imperceptibly. "Thank you." Marjatta was the first to rise. Mikko remained seated for a moment longer. He looked at Aino for a long time, as if expecting her to say something more. To confess. To explain. To give at least one reason to believe that everything wasn't what it seemed. But Aino remained silent. "I'm genuinely sad about this," Mikko finally said quietly. It was the only sentence he left behind before he stood up and closed the door behind him. Only Aino and Juhani remained in the room. Juhani didn't seem to be in a hurry. He waited until the footsteps from the corridor faded and disappeared into the steady hum of the office afternoon. Only then did he rise from his chair, walk to the window, and stand looking out at the rain-darkened yard. "Quite a heavy day," the man finally said without turning around. Aino didn't answer. "I don't believe you're a bad person." Juhani slowly turned toward her. "You just made a really bad decision." Aino kept her gaze on the table. "I'm sorry." "I believe you." Juhani returned to the table, picked up his coffee cup, and noticed the drink had gone cold. He grimaced slightly, opened the bottom drawer of his desk, and took out a small silver flask. The cap opened with a familiar motion. Juhani poured a small amount of amber-colored liquid into his coffee, closed the flask, and pushed it back into the drawer. The gesture seemed as natural to him as adding milk to coffee. For a moment, a smoky, oaky scent spread through the room as Juhani began stirring his coffee with a spoon. "Do you know what bothers me most about all this?" Aino shook her head. "That you are exceptionally talented." He tasted his coffee and seemed pleased with the flavor of the mixture. "People like that don't come along very often." Aino swallowed. "Thank you." "Don't thank me yet." Juhani set the cup down on the table. "Trust is the most important quality in this work. Calculation errors can be fixed, but this cannot." He let the sentence hang in the air for a moment. "I can no longer accept you working in your current position. I would have grounds to terminate you, but I've been thinking of something a bit gentler." "What does that mean?" "It means that the Baltic operations will be launching on a practical level in the coming weeks. The Tallinn unit needs people to handle basic processes." Juhani took a folder from his briefcase and opened it on the table. "You'll be there from now on." Aino lifted her gaze for the first time. "There?" "Yes." Juhani flipped through the papers. "You will no longer handle data analysis, forecasting, or reporting. Those tasks will be transferred to others." Each word felt heavier than the last. "Your responsibilities will include inventory counts, verifying basic data, supplier registers, accounts payable processing, and other operational support tasks. Some of them pertain to Finnish operations, some to the Baltics." Aino listened wistfully to Juhani's words. She had spent years learning to build financial models, evaluate investments, and find connections in data that others couldn't see. Now she was being transferred to tasks that any diligent employee could learn in a few weeks. "I understand," she said quietly. Juhani observed her for a moment. "Do you really understand?" Aino thought about her answer for a long time. "I understand that I have lost trust." Juhani nodded. "Exactly." He stood up once more, opened the same drawer as before, and began searching for something at the back of it. After a moment, he pulled out a small, cream-colored alpaca plush toy. Aino noticed Juhani smile for the first time during the entire conversation. "Do you remember the alpacas?" Aino nodded slowly. The day she signed the employment contract. Laughter that was too loud. The smell of alcohol lingering around Juhani. A conversation that had ended in a completely incomprehensible way, from mathematics to alpacas. "Alpacas always look like they're a little bit confused." Juhani twirled the plush toy in his hand and finally handed it across the table. Aino hesitated. "It's a gift," Juhani said calmly. "Just take it." Aino finally took the plush toy, somewhat awkwardly, its soft faux fur feeling warm beneath her fingers. "Thank you." "I genuinely hope Tallinn does you good." Juhani's tone was friendly, but something in it made Aino feel smaller than she had just moments earlier. ***** When Aino returned to her workstation, the office was already considerably quieter. The afternoon chatter had been replaced by the hum of the air conditioning and the sound of keyboards from a few rooms. The coffee machine's indicator light blinked in standby mode, and a cleaning cart clattered in the corridor. Aino opened each drawer of her desk in turn. Inside she found three notebooks, colored pens, a spare mouse battery, a mug with the company's old logo, and a sweater that had been missing for several weeks. Aino packed the items into her backpack one by one and then left her office, possibly for the last time. A few workstations away, two colleagues stopped their conversation when they saw her. One nodded, the other looked away. No one came to ask what had happened. Aino stopped at Elisa's door and knocked, receiving no answer. She managed to peer inside through the blinds, which had been left half-open. Everything was in its place in the empty room, but that was precisely what made the sight so strange. Elisa never left the office with her computer or a dirty coffee cup left on her desk. Now that had happened. Aino tried to come up with an ordinary explanation. Maybe Elisa had fallen ill. Maybe she had been called to a meeting. Maybe she had left in the middle of the day to go home. None of the options seemed to fit with what she knew about Elisa. Aino would have liked to stay and investigate further, but yesterday's meeting had turned the office into a place where she no longer felt welcome. ________________________________________ Aino had been heading for the bus stop, but her feet carried her to a damp forest path instead. The rain had stopped, but water droplets still fell from the branches of the tall spruce trees. Wet moss gave way slightly with each step, and the blueberry bushes along the path had already lost most of their leaves. Aino walked without a destination. When darkness fell, she dug her headlamp out of her backpack and followed its beam into the depths of the forest. For the first time in a long while, she noticed she was so tired that her mind no longer had the energy to search for explanations for why things had turned out the way they had. She stopped by the shore of a small pond and looked at her reflection in the dark water's surface. Her face looked gray, lost, and as if it had seen too much. Around her was nothing but blackness. ________________________________________ It was already nearly nine in the evening when Aino opened the office building's outer door with her access card. On her way there, she hadn't been at all sure whether her card would still be active, but her access rights hadn't been revoked at least yet. The lobby was nearly dark. Only a single light burned above the reception desk, its dim halo quickly left behind as Aino walked toward her office. Every footstep echoed in the empty corridor, and the motion-sensor lights created the impression that the building was gradually coming to life only because of her movement. Aino had forgotten her phone charger in the outlet next to her desk. She went to retrieve it and had already returned to the corridor when she suddenly heard voices from the CEO's office behind a closed door. Juhani was speaking on the phone in English. His voice was lower than usual, almost conversational, but in the silence of the empty office, every word was astonishingly clear. "...yes... they did exactly what it was supposed to do." Aino stopped instinctively. She hadn't planned to stay and listen. The intention had been to get the charger and leave right away, but Juhani's words had already captured her attention in a way she couldn't escape. Juhani was silent for a moment, as if listening to a long response, and then laughed quietly. "No. The board believed every word." Aino felt her shoulders tense. "The extra five hundred wasn't a problem. I got the valuation report for the board." Aino closed her eyes. Five hundred—it had to refer to five hundred thousand. Aino had determined in her own calculations that the real estate investments in Tallinn had been about half a million euros above market value. She had thought Juhani was incompetent or careless, but the words spoken into the phone suggested that the properties were deliberately overpaid for. The person on the other end spoke again at length. When Juhani responded, his voice grew slightly impatient. "Listen... the purchase is completed. Your money is clean now. That's the whole point." Aino's breathing became uneven; she could feel her heartbeat in the blood vessels of her brain. The other party spoke again for a long time, after which Juhani responded, now sounding almost angry. "I honestly don't care. Nobody can trace the origin now. We are done." Aino noticed she was squeezing the charger cord so tightly that her fingers hurt. At that moment, Juhani's call ended, and footsteps began to approach the corridor from the other side of the door. Aino glanced around. The long corridor suddenly looked far too open, and the low partition of the nearest workstation wouldn't have hidden her at all. However, a few meters away along the corridor was a small print room, its door left open, apparently by the cleaners. Aino took a couple of quick but as silent steps as possible and hid in the corner of the print room. She stood so close to the wall that the smell of white paint made her feel slightly nauseous. The CEO's door opened. Aino feared her heart was pounding so loudly that it could be heard all the way to the corridor. Juhani stepped out of his room unhurriedly, as if he had simply decided to stretch after a long workday. The man stopped in the corridor, looked at the dim open office for a moment, and let his gaze slowly move from one workstation to another. Then he took a few steps toward the exit, stopped once more, and glanced back—Aino thought for a fraction of a second that she had been discovered. But Juhani finally continued toward the exit, took a swig from his flask, and eventually disappeared into the building's stone stairwell. Only after the elevator beeped did Aino dare to pull her face away from the print room wall and fill her lungs with the ink-scented room air. Aino now knew too much—far more than she had ever wanted to know. The company, through Juhani, was involved in concealing the origin of certain sums of money; of that, Aino was relatively certain based on the phone call. Most of the puzzle pieces were still missing, but her brain immediately began assessing the probabilities of different scenarios like a computer. **** Only two days later, Aino stood on the outer deck of the ferry, near the stern, both hands gripping the handle of her large suitcase. The wind from the sea caught her hair and made the hem of her coat flutter restlessly. Aino was cold, but she didn't move inside. She wanted to watch Helsinki slowly disappear behind her. The harbor shrank gradually. The container cranes turned into gray lines against the sky, and the familiar buildings of the city slowly merged into a single pale silhouette. Somewhere above, seagulls followed the ship for a moment before they too turned back toward the shore. Aino lowered her gaze to her suitcase and adjusted the straps of the backpack on her back. She had only the essentials with her; most of her belongings remained in her Helsinki home, which Aino had no intention of giving up. She would live in a furnished company apartment in Tallinn, so she wouldn't have housing costs there. She didn't know how often she would visit Finland in the future or how long the Tallinn assignment would last. Aino's throat tightened. She had been lonely in Helsinki too, but in Tallinn she had no one. Aino had only seen a few photos of her future Tallinn apartment attached to an email. The small flat looked modern and tidy, almost cozy, but the pictures didn't tell her what it would feel like. Would it be quiet there? Would the washing machine leave the scent of the previous occupant's detergent on her clothes? Would the bed have a firm or soft mattress? Aino didn't know. She knew almost nothing about the future. But one thing was certain: as soon as the door closed behind her, she would do something she had been waiting for all day. Aino would take off all her clothes. All those heavy adult clothes beneath which she had tried to be like everyone else. She would be left wearing only a thick diaper, which would push her legs slightly apart. The diaper didn't need to be dry—it would get wet at some point during play anyway. Aino would take out her pacifier and all 27 little Pets figures from the cloth bag. She would build an island for the Pets out of a blanket and a house out of pillows. Then she would play to her heart's content. Each figure would speak with its own voice; they would be allowed to romp and fool around as freely as they wished. The cat could open a café and the crab a laboratory. Sucking the pacifier would feel as safe as always. Aino would get to be small, and no one would come to break the boundaries of her beautiful, carefree world. Gradually, sleep dust would gather in her eyes, and eventually Aino would fall asleep with the pacifier in her mouth, surrounded by white pillows and blankets. A warm diaper as protection for her body would make relaxation complete. BLINK Elisa's face unexpectedly appeared in Aino's mind. It wasn't a controlled thought—it just appeared, as if someone had opened the door to a room that Aino had been trying to keep closed by all means. She saw Elisa in the sauna changing room, changing her diaper with gentle and respectful movements. She heard Elisa's voice in her mind: "Because sometimes a person needs someone to do the things they can't manage to do themselves." Aino clenched her hands into fists. Why had Elisa disappeared? Had something happened to her? Or had Elisa simply... left her, because Aino was no longer useful? Maybe the whole relationship had been just that—power, manipulation, and calculated closeness. Maybe Elisa had never cared. Or maybe what Aino had felt between them had been real. Maybe Aino would never know the truth. The wind grew stronger again. Aino turned her gaze toward the horizon, where Helsinki was now only a thin line between water and sky. Soon that too would disappear. Aino pulled her collar higher and stayed watching the sea that stretched before her, gray and endless. Somewhere on its other side waited an apartment she had never seen, a job she didn't want, and a city where she knew no one. "Elisa... I miss you," Aino said quietly, and let the sea wind carry the words away.

Great story 

Leftovers (again)