The Error - Final Chapter Added 6/21/2022

[Little Matt]

Here we go. It's been a long, long, long time since I started this. I've restarted it in fits and starts.

I'm nearing the end and I'll be releasing chapters slowly over the next several months. I'm writing ahead of what I'm putting out. I'd thought I might wait until I'm actually done. But I'm really close, so here we go.

Here are the first 18 chapters which have already been published, but are no longer on this board.

 

Chapter 1

This was not the way Thomas Welton wanted to begin his first day at his new school. This was not the way any 13 year-old should begin any day. Tom took every insult to his maturity seriously and this one was particularly grievous. He had grown tired of everyone assuming he was a little kid, a mere elementary schooler. He was officially a teenager and even if he was a little shorter than average, adults should know better than to simply presume he wanted a kid's menu or whatever it was they did to overlook his status as a teen.

These are, at any rate, the things he told himself. Though he was barely aware of it he envied younger kids, the way they didn't have to struggle to prove that they were big and mature and completely independent. Somewhere in the back of his mind the thought lingered that he had wasted his opportunity to simply be a carefree kid on his constant quest to prove himself grown-up.

But no matter how aware he was of those feelings he wasn't about to let on as his mother drove him to his first day of morning daycare.  Her new job required her to arrive early, too early to take Tom to school. So she had found a nearby daycare that offered a bus service to the local schools. Tom thought he could ride his bike to school but was over ruled by his mother who insisted it was much too far for that. So he sat staring glumly out the window taking some solace in the promise that this particular center had an area for Jr High students in his position so he wouldn't have to spend all morning hanging out with little kids and being treated like a little kid.

He was momentarily pulled out of his brooding funk as he felt the car come to stop. This was all quite worse than than he thought. Crude art projects decorated the windows cheerfully colored playground equipment sat waiting to be used. To Tom every detail screamed that this was a place for immature little brats, something that he was not, something he never was. He stepped out of the car and glared at this rugrat jail only to be interrupted by his mother giving him a quick pat on the head before starting her way to the door. Tom gave gave a resigned sigh and followed her in.

Inside the daycare center was a desk marked by a single name plate decorated with teddy bear stickers and bearing the name “Sarah.” And behind the desk the Sarah identified by the name tag sat beaming at the new mother and student who had just walked through her door. Her slightly plump round face and easy smile made her a natural for the part of a daycare teacher, To most of the parents here she was the face of the daycare and her obvious pride and experience in her work reassured them all that this was a safe and comfortable place for their little ones.

“This must be my new student,” she said cheerfully “Tommy isn't it?”

“Tom” he corrected her tersely.

Her eyes twinkled at his attempted protest “I'm sorry Tom, I didn't know I was getting such a grown up boy.” She turned to his mother and gave her a knowing smile before asking “And what school will we be sending Tom to this morning?”

“Stone Ridge Junior High” Tom answered with a a touch of pride before his mother could even speak.

“Well” Sarah chuckled “I guess we really do have quite the grown up here. Before you know it he'll be working here.”

Tom glowered silently as the adults went about their final arrangements
 

“I'm sorry” Karen Welton said “he thinks he's too old for daycare so he's a little grumpy this morning.”

“Well I'm sure we'll find a way to make him fit right in.” As Sarah smiled her reassurances at him Tom couldn't help but notice the odd twinkle in her eye. It took him aback momentarily and he couldn't help but think that however sweet this woman might be she meant everything she said, perhaps in ways he could never quite understand.

With her business concluded Karen turned to her son and kissed him on the forehead “Have a good day at school sweety. I'll pick you up right at three, maybe we can rent a movie or something.”

Tom mumbled a good-bye and watched her walk through the door, leaving him in the care of Kiddie Town Daycare. Sarah called over one of the teachers and introduced her to Tom.

“Linda” she said calling over a younger blond haired woman and handing her a packet of papers “this is our new boy, would you mind showing him around.”

Tom this is Linda she'll show you where to put your things and get you settled in.”

“Come on Tommy” Linda smiled “I'm sure you'll have lots of fun here.”
 

Tom crossed his arms and issued his correction for the second time today “I only like to be called Tom.”

“I'll be sure to remember that” Linda said paying little attention to her new charge's indignation “These are the cubbies we part all our things in, well make sure to get your name on yours.” She explained using the voice she obviously reserved for small children as took his backpack and coat and tucked them neatly into his cubby.

“And over here is the play area we've got toys and games on that shelf over there...”

“I really just need to see the area for kids who are going to the junior high. I'm just here so I can get on the bus, I don't want to play with toys or be babysat.”

“I'm sorry hon but we don't have any other kids going to your school today so we're just putting everybody in this room for now. But I'm sure you'll be able to have lots of fun in here too.” Linda said not breaking her condescending manner at all. She gave the papers Sarah had handed her a second look and shrugged before leaving Tom with some more reassurances.

Tom stomped off and found a chair where we could sit and wait. “What is wrong with everybody in this town?” He thought to himself as he tried to ignore the throng of kids playing around him.

It wasn't long before one of them came up to him with a big red ball in his hand “Hi, I'm Johnny and I'm in third grade, do you wanna play something.”

Tom didn't even look before spitting out “Look, I'm not a little kid like you guys and I don't want to play, just leave me alone.”

“Well sorry,” Johnny rolled his eyes “I was trying to be nice.”

Tom returned to glaring into space as Johnny went off to play. He sat and stewed until it was finally time to board the bus. Outside he found several different buses. He stopped and look around for a second until on the the drivers leaned out the window with a clip board  and called “Uh Tommy Welton, this is your bus.” Tom gritted his teeth at being called that name again but boarded the bus relieved to be done with daycare for the day.

Tom looked out the window and thought about how great it would be to finally establish his new teenage life in his new town. At least he'd have something to balance out his dreadful mornings. He was bought back to reality by the driver calling out “Alright Tommy, this is where you'll be getting off.”

“Tom.” he corrected as he walked hurriedly off the bus. He stepped of the bus and looked around, something obviously wasn't right. Behind him he heard the bus drive off as he tried to figure out what had happened. Finally he spotted the sign on the lawn in front of the office “Sunny Brook Elementary School.”

“Shit these idiots brought me to the wrong school.” Tom muttered to himself. He cursed his luck and walked towards the office determined to clear up this grievous mistake. Little did he know the forces he was up against.


Chapter 2

Tom walked into the office of Sunny Brook Elementary confident that he'd clear everything up and be on his way to Stone Ridge Junior High where he belonged. He went right up to the front desk and wasted no time getting to business “The bus dropped me off at the wrong place, I need to call somebody so I can get to the right school.”

The secretary barely took her attention away from the parent she was speaking with “I'm talking with a grown-up dear, maybe you can review the rules while you wait for us to finish.” She directed his attention to a colorful poster on the back wall and went back to her business.

Tom looked at the poster and gave a disgusted eye roll. It was a list of simple rules aimed at elementary school aged kids. “We let everybody have their turn” it read “We do not interrupt. We always speak politely and say 'Please' and 'Thank you'.” Tom crossed his arms and waited impatiently this was not a place he wanted to stay any longer than necessary.

Finally the interminable conversation ended and Tom strided up to the desk and launched straight into his story.

The secretary put her hand to her chin and pondered the situation for a moment. “There's never been a mistake like this before, this is a very well run district. What's your name hon?”

“Tom Welton.” he replied finally feeling like he was getting somewhere.

“Oh yes, I have a Tommy Welton listed as starting in Mrs. Sanborn's fifth grade class.” She said as though the answer to everything.

“I'm not in the fifth grade and I like to be called Tom. Somebody made some sort of mistake.”

“Is you mom's name Karen?”

“Yes.” Tom replied impatiently.

“And are you going to Kiddie Town Daycare?”

“Yes,” Tom groaned “But only because I've got to take the bus.”

“Well that matches what this form says, I even have your mom's signature with fifth grade checked off.” She said as though she was actually trying to talk him into this.

“She probably just didn't notice.” Tom said exasperated.

“Well I've never seen a error on one of these forms before. Like I said things are very well run here, we don't make mistakes like this. She caught attention of a tall kindly looking man walking through the office and pointed out Tom to him. “This child says he's supposed to go to Stone Ridge but the bus dropped him off here and he's listed as a student here.”

The man pondered the situation for a second “Let's go look this up on the computer,” he turned to Tom and said “We'll be back in a minute son.” And the two went behind a door labeled “Mr. Lessen, Principal.”

From behind the door Tom could bits of their conversation “He doesn't look that old to me either, but do you think a kid would really tell a lie like that.”

The scowl on his face deepened. Adults were always saying things like that. It was stupid, it was perfectly obvious he was a teenager. Maybe if his mother would let him buy the clothes he wanted things like this wouldn't happen. As he sat there he made up his mind that after today he'd insist on being treated as grown-up as he really was.

After a few minutes Tom was called into the office. He breathed a sigh of relief fully expecting that his true status had been verified and he would be back on his way to the school where he belonged.

Mr. Lessen invited Tom to sit and explained the situation to him in a well practiced 'talking to a child' tone, “Well Tommy it looks like everything checks out you're officially a fifth grader. Are you sure you weren't just trying to get out of school today?”

“Yes I'm sure,” Tom said too exasperated to correct the principal on his name “I was done with the fifth grade two years ago. Call my mom and ask.”

“I do intend to speak to your mother, but for now I want to report to your classroom.”

Tom shuffled along behind the secretary angrily wondering what sort of grown-up activities the teenagers at Stone Ridge were up to and not paying the slightest attention to her tour of the playground  Finally they arrived at the door of Mrs. Sanborn's class. “This is your classroom, now remember that you can always come to the office if you get sick or skin your knee or have an accident or if you just need to call your mom.”
 

Tom groaned inwardly “Accident? Did this lady seriously think there was a chance he'd wet his pants?”

“Oh, and I'll make sure we get your uniform ready. You can stay dressed like that today but you'll have to wear from tomorrow on. Have fun”

“Thank God, I'll be out of here after they talk to mom.” Tom thought

Tom walked inside the classroom and thought he'd gag on the cutesy decorations on the wall. The entire classroom was adorned with cartoon animals an various posters bore reminders of the class rules. Tom just reminded himself that this be for today only and walked up to the desk to introduce himself.

“My name is Tom and I...”

“Oh Tommy, you must be the new boy. I hear you think you're supposed to be going to Stone Ridge.”

“I am. And I only like to be called Tom.”

“Well I'm sure everything well get straightened out. We've already got a desk ready for you right over there.” Mrs. Sanborn pointed a desk with a name plate that read “Tommy” in the front row. “I guess we'll have to change the name tag, but that should be good enough for now. All your books are already under your desk.”

Tom sat down bitterly in his desk as Mrs. Sanborn called the class to order. “Class he have a new student today can you all say 'hi' to Tom.”

Tom rolled his eyes as the assembled brats said “Hi Tom” in a juvenile sing-song unison.

“Tom why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?” Mrs. Sanborn invited.

“First of all no matter what this thing on my desk says my name is Tom not Tommy. And I'm only here for today because somebody messed up, I'm supposed to be in junior high.” Tom explained in a loud defiant voice with his arms crossed tight. Tom did his best to ignore the doubting giggles and snickers as Mrs. Sanborn began class for the day.

“Now everybody get out your science books and turn to page 75. Tom, since this is your first day I'll give you first try at this question. What are the three basic types of wave function?”

Tom blinked. “Wave function?”

“Now come on try to remember” Mrs. Sanborn coaxed as all the other students shot their hands into there air eager to answer.

Tom sat and tried to remember ever hearing of such a thing all around him the class grew more and more eager to answer, each straining to lift their hand higher than the others. “I don't know” Tom finally admitted.

Tom's admission elicited one last round of excited hand waving and calls of “Pick me, pick me.”

Mrs. Sanborn looked over the class for a moment “Alright Jessica, can you tell us what the basic types of wave function are.

“A complex vector with finitely many components, a complex vector with infinitely many components, and a complex vector with one or more real variables.” Jessica said smiling proudly.

“Very good Jessica. Now if you remember yesterday we were discussing one dimensional momentum space...”

Tom stared slack jawed at all around him. Everybody in this room, he was convinced, was completely insane. He'd never heard any of this before. Something was very wrong with this town. He hoped that they wouldn't be like this over at the junior high. He sat for the rest of time in complete incomprehension until his teacher announced that it was time for recess.

He wondered out to the playground still in shock from the bizarre scene he'd just witnessed. He looked around and realized that everything in this place was for little kids. With nothing else to do he sat on a swing and stared despondently at the ground.

As he sat a group of boys walked past him. One of them looked at him and asked 'What's the matter Tommy.”

“My name's Tom” he said with a little less conviction than before “and I'm fine, I just want to go the right school.”

“You don't even know basic quantum mechanics ” scoffed the largest boy of the group “you should probably be in preschool or something.”

With that Tom stood up to face him before noticing he was actually quite a bit bigger. “Come on Todd, leave him alone it's just his first day at school” said one of the group.

“Fine” said Todd “I guess we'll just let the pouty baby pout on the swings.” and with that they left. Tom sat back down trying to look as dignified as he possibly could after a fifth grader had just stood up for him. All he wanted at this point was to get through this day with as little notice as possible.

The rest of the day in class went much the same as the first. Tom had no idea what was going on, he just knew he wanted out of this place. Finally the last bell rang and he made a bee line for the office where he hoped he'd find that everything had been cleared up.

inside he found his mother speaking with the principal. “Hi sweety,” she greeted him “I have good news, Stone Ridge is going to let you transfer and all you have to do is pass one little test. Inside Tom told himself that what happened today was a fluke, he could pass any test they gave him with flying colors.

Mr. Lessen gave him his test packet and a pencil and let Tom take the test in the privacy of his office. Tom opened the booklet and his heart sank. If anything this test was crazier than the stuff he'd heard in class today. All of it was completely alien to him. He did his best to struggle through, but all he could do was guess.

Once again Tom found himself staring glumly out the the window of his mother's car. Only this time he was officially a fifth grader again. In the back seat sat his brand new school uniform, a simple light blue collared shirt with the school logo emblazoned  on the front, a figure of child holding a teddy bear in one hand an adult's hand in the other. Along with the shirt was a pair of slacks and pair of shorts. Tom took some solace in the fact that he didn't have to wear the even more babyish uniform of the lower grades. Still he knew everywhere he went he would be unmistakably identified as the grade school student he now was. And he was beginning to wonder if this really wasn't the place he belonged after all.

 

Chapter 3

Tom strode though the entrance of Stone Ridge Junior High. “Hey Tom” called out one of his friends. Tom joined up with his friends who were already hanging out in the hall discussing the usual teenage stuff. There was some talk of how great it would be once they got their learner's permits which none of them were too far away from getting. Somewhere in the distance there was gentle music. It played so softly Tom didn't so much hear it as sense it. Slowly it grew louder and more distinct, it was now clearly a nursery rhyme. Tom glanced around but nobody else seemed to notice. Eventually it grew to drown out the conversation. Tom stood up and covered his ears, nobody else reacted at all.

Tom woke to the electronic screeching of his alarm clock. He reached over and smacked it back into silence, in the quite gray light of morning reality flooded back to him. His new school uniform freshly laundered and folded was already sitting on the chair next to him. He reluctantly went about the business of getting ready for his 2nd day of the fifth grade.

He sloped down the stairs and into the kitchen trying his best to ignore his mother's “isn't he cute” looks as he sat down to breakfast

“Aww honey, it's not that bad is it?” she finally spoke up.

“I just want to go where I'm supposed to go instead of spending all day with a bunch of little kids.” Tom groused.

Karen ran her fingers gently through her son's hair “I know you won't like this but you might not be quite as grown-up as you think.”

Tom scowled, feeling angry at his mother for making such a comment, but mostly because he was afraid she was right. Somewhere inside him he felt a glimmer of hope that somebody might really know the young adult he was always trying to look like, but he quickly pushed it back down and continued eating his breakfast.

Karen rubbed his back “I know it's no fun right now honey, but I think this might be for the best” she said before leaving the room to make a phone call.

At Kiddie Town Karen explained the situation to Sarah who had been sure to inform Tom of how adorable he looked in his new uniform. Karen gave her son a good-bye kiss on his forehead and left him again care of Sarah and her staff. A she drove away she wondered if she would ever reach the little boy she knew was under her son's defiant exterior.
 

Tom found his seat from the day before still unhappy to be stuck in daycare but feeling somewhat less conspicuously mature now that he dressed like most of the other children. After a few minutes he heard a familiar voice behind him.

“Hey, I thought you said you a big kid.”

Tom turned around and saw Johnny from the day before.

“I am” John explained “In fact I'm a teenager.”

“But you're wearing a Sunny Brook uniform just like me, even though mine is sort of different cause I'm in the third grade.”

“Somebody made a mistake I'm supposed to go to a different school.” Tom shot back defensively.

“It's OK if you're not a big kid, you can still play with us over there” Johnny said pointing out some of his friends on the other side of the room.”

“I don't want to play. Why don't you get wet you diapers with your friends?” Tom snorted derisively.

“Fine” Johnny said rolling his eyes.

Tom turned back around and blinked. He realized how immature he looked in contrast to the third grader who wanted nothing more to play with him. He shook his head and dismissed it all as a reaction to the stress he was under.

At school Tom shuffled back into his classroom and found his desk still labeled “Tommy.” Mrs. Sanborn noticed him staring at it.

“I'm sorry I forgot to change that, do you really mind being called 'Tommy' so much?” She asked him.

Tom to his surprise found himself answering “no.” It was a battle he was weary of fighting.

Mrs. Sanborn smiled warmly “Well Tommy, we're certainly glad to have you stay with us.”

As kids filtered into the classroom nobody seemed very surprised to see Tom back in class again. It seemed that the entire world had quite easily accepted him as fifth grader. Class began and Tom could see that this day was going to be like the last. He struggled to gain even the faintest grasp of the material. How could these mere children be so far beyond him?

Finally recess gave him a brief reprieve from his classroom struggles.  Today the playground seemed like entirely different place. Yesterday he had assumed he just a visitor. But today this was his playground, he was truly under the watchful eye of the adults who kept the students safe and behaved. He sat down again in a swing and watched the goings on. After a few minutes he found himself absentmindedly swinging back and forth a bit. He caught himself and composed himself back into the teenager he felt himself to be making a mental note to only do what little kid stuff was necessary to make it through this situation.

The bell signaling the end of recess rang and Tom lined up obediently joined the rest of his class  in a neat line as they waited for their teacher to bring them back into class. Mrs. Sanborn took a quick head count of her charges and led them back into class. On the way in Tom became a aware of an urge from his bladder. Not wishing to make the fuss of asking his fifth grade teacher for permission to go he decided to hold it until lunch.

But as class progressed the need to empty his bladder became increasingly dire. Finally he was forced to raise his hand.

“Yes Tommy?” Mrs. Sanborn acknowledged.

“I need to use the restroom.”

“Now Tommy you should know by now that your expected to take of that during recess. We only have 15 minutes until lunch and I think you need that time to catch up on your bounded harmonics.”

For the next 15 minutes Tom fought his bladder's desperate need for release. When his class finally let out for lunch he made a mad dash for the restroom. There he discovered something very odd. He hadn't noticed before but the button on his pants had a weird sort of latch that had to be worked to open the fly. He sat and stared at it for a moment unable to quite figure out how to undo it. Around him his fellow students ran in and out of the bathroom seeming to have no difficulty at all with this complication. As he struggled he felt his bladder release. A warm wet feeling spread through his pants as he soaked himself helplessly. Along with a sense of utter embarrassment also came a wave of relief and a sense of dread as he realized what he'd have to do.

He came out of the bathroom trying to pull his shirt down in a futile attempt to hide his accident. He found his teacher and fighting back tears tried to explain himself.

She noticed his wet pants before he could even begin his explanation. “Oh Tommy, couldn't quite hold it dear?”

Tom could only shake his head as he followed his teacher to the office. Once there he just looked at the ground while he was led in to see the school nurse. The nurse saw what he was there for immediately “Aww It's OK honey, we'll get you into some dry clothes” she said.

“You can come back class when your done here Tommy” Mrs. Sanborn said as she left him in the nurses office.

Tom turned to the nurse desperate to explain himself “It's just because of these pants, they've got some weird thing on the button and I couldn't get them off.” he pleaded.

He was slightly shocked when she didn't waste a moment reaching over and undoing his button. “You're clothes are just fine. You don't need to make silly excuses hon, little boys have accidents it's nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“I'm not a little boy” Tom almost whimpered.

“Uh huh” she replied as she helped him out of his wet clothes. Tom blushed deeply as he tried to cover himself. She dumped the soaked things into a plastic bag and grabbed a few things from the closet. “Here you go hon, you can wear these.”

Tom sighed slightly as he saw the cartoon print underwear he'd just been handed. He knew he had no choice in the matter so he pulled them on along with a pair of dry pants, this time he noticed these had the same sort of fly. “Thank you” he muttered feeling embarrassed at having been so dependent on her.

“Anytime hon.” She said patting his head. “Now go get back to class, I'll call your mom so she'll know to pick up your wet things.” Tom nodded and headed back to class suddenly feeling much more like a real elementary schooler.


Chapter 4


After returning from the school nurse Tom spent the rest of the day half eager and half dreading the the end of school. On one hand he'd be able to get away from this bizarre place, but on the other he'd have to explain to his mom why he'd wet his pants.

Class ended promptly at 3 and he trudged his way to the parking lot and saw his mother was already there. Drawing a deep breath he climbed into the passenger prepared to defend himself.

“Hey hon, have a rough day at school?” His mother inquired sympathetically.

“Yeah sort of. But it's not my fault...”

“I know it's not your fault, lots of kids have accidents. You just didn't know they don't give bathroom passes here.”

Tom was amazed at the way his mother was taking this. It was as though he really was a child who couldn't be fully expected to handle his toileting. He wasn't sure whether he should accept the sympathy or insist on being treated like someone his own age.

“I guess you're kind of right.” Tom shrugged feeling relieved to get the issue behind him. All he had to do was figure out how to work that odd little latch. For now he could live with the little kid treatment, and in a strange town where he had learn so many new things he was finding it to be something of a saving grace.

Karen smiled at her son and ruffled his hair “That's my boy.”

At home Tom flopped down in front of the TV happy to have another day behind him. He knew the cable had been installed that day and was eager to watch MTV and forget about how he spent the day at elementary school. He cycled through the channels a few times but couldn't find anything that looked anything like MTV.

“Mom?” he called “Do you know what channel MTV is on?”

“The cable company here doesn't have it. Why don't find something else to watch.”

Tom sighed and figured he could easily find something else. But he found nothing at all that interested him. As far as he could tell almost all of them were for old people or least people who understood that boring financial talk, a few had weird movies he just didn't understand. Finally he settled on the one thing he could understand, cartoons.

He hadn't seen this one before, and he had to admit it he was enjoying it. He'd known kids back
at home who still watched cartoons, some were even popular. But he always thought it was all to babyish for him. But here he was and after a long day it was relaxing to just sit and enjoy something.

Before he long he once again felt his bladder begin to call for emptying. He waited for a commercial and went into the bathroom determined to figure out that latch that had defeated him earlier. He'd seen the nurse open it so he thought he knew what to do but he still struggled with it. From Tom's perspective it was rather complicated and required quite a bit of finesse. He fought for several minutes as the urge grew. Finally he decided he'd need help.

“Uh... mom. I sort of need some help. Please.” He called from the door of the bathroom.

“Yes hon?” She said walking up to the door and looking at him curiously.

“It's just this button, it's weird. I don't really know how to open it.” Tom blushed as asked like a toddler for help going to the bathroom.

Without another word she reached down and effortlessly undid the button. “There you go, is this why you had that accident today?”

Tom just nodded blushing a bit more.

“Well that's OK, you'll get the hang of it, all the other children do.”

Tom finished his business and went back to watching cartoons. He'd already been watching for some time and was becoming hooked. The evening wore on and eventually his mother came in to announce that it was time to get ready for bed.

“Mom, it's only 9 O'clock. I never go to bed this early.” He protested.

“You've been staying up far too late, and your teacher say you have a lot of catching up to do so you'll need your rest.”

Tom sulked but decided not to argue that he was too old for this with the woman who had laundered his wet pants. He went up stairs to his room and began to undress. His mother wasn't too far behind. “Still need help with those pants.”

Tom again acquiesced to his mother helping him with his clothes. He unbuttoned his pants and helped him out of them thinking to herself about how cute he looked in the cartoon print underwear.
“You need any more help hon?” she asked.

“No I can do the rest.” Tom said feeling a bit embarrassed.

“Alright, I put some pjs on your dresser if you want to wear them, it's going to get pretty chilly tonight. Good night sweety.”

“Good night, mom.” Tom said as she left the room. He'd given up wearing pajamas some time ago and preferred to sleep in his underwear. Not the underwear like he was currently wearing, he changed out of that, but pajamas were one of the many things he'd felt he'd outgrown.

He turned out the light and climbed into bed. After a a few minutes of tossing and turning he realized that it wasn't just chilly it was freezing. No matter how he piled the covers he was still cold. He got out of bid and slipped on the pajamas his mother had left for him. Luckily they didn't have any cartoon characters on them or anything like that. But they were warm and cozy. Tom climbed back into bed as comfy as he could be and quickly fell into a deep sleep.

 

Chapter 5


Tom made his way through another morning at Kiddie Town and sat though another bewildering day of class. He couldn't understand how these little kids could know so much more than him, how they could be so much more capable than him in so many ways. Unable to follow the day's lessons his mind kept wandering back to the day before and how he'd wet his pants just because he wasn't able to do something everybody else found so simple.

These thoughts became more intense when he once again began to feel the need to go the restroom. The last thing he wanted to do was have an accident for the second day in a row so he sat and thought about how he'd finally undo that stupid latch. At last it was time for recess and he bolted for the boy's room.

He examined it for a minute. He'd seen it worked several times now and had a pretty good idea of how to do it. He made several attempts making some progress, but the mechanism was ultimately too delicate for him. He sighed deeply and walked out to the playground.

He found his teacher and looking at his shoes stammered “I think I sort of need some help.”

“What do you need Tommy?” Mrs. Sanborn asked.

“I just need some help undoing this fly.” Tommy said barely above a whisper.

She bent down close so she could hear him “What was that dear?”

Tommy again whispered into her ear and she briefly gave him a surprised look. “OK, let's get that taken of.”

She followed his into the restroom and easily helped him with his predicament. All the while she was careful not to hurt his feeling but Tom could tell from the way she looked at him that she was beginning to think he didn't even belong in her class. He finished up hoping that nobody had witnessed anything.

At the end of class that day Tom started for the door when he heard Mrs. Sanborn call his name. He turned back around and went up to her desk.

“Tommy, I have a note here for your mother. Could you get her to sign it and bring it back tomorrow?” Tom took the envelope and nodded. He had some idea of what was in it, but he knew he had little choice but to give it to his mom. Not wanting to deal with it right after school he shoved it deep into his backpack and went out to her car.

“Hey sweety, did you have a better day today?” She greeted him.

“Yeah” Tom said shrugging his shoulders.

“I'm have to head by the mall for a bit, wanna come with me?”

“Sure” Tom said.

Tom listened to the radio and watched the scenery go by and began to forget about having to ask his teacher for help going to the bathroom. The car pulled into the mall parking lot and Tom gawked at how huge it was. He was sure there'd be plenty of things for him to do that would let him forget about being an elementary schooler for a while.

 Inside the mall was incredibly crowded. Tom was surprised that such a small town could produce so many people but was to interested in finding an arcade to care very much.

“Hey mom can I go look around, I'll meet you back here in an hour.”

His mom gave him a skeptical look and for a moment he thought she'd say no “Alright, but be back in half an hour instead” she said before handing him some money to play around with.

Tom was thrilled, finally he was getting a taste of teenage freedom. He got a large soda at the food court and began to look around. He spotted an arcade and walked confidently over to it. But when he got inside he paused. He got out a dollar bill and got some tokens from the machine and began to look around for something to play. But as he explored he noticed that the other teenagers were looking at him like he was an invader. He realized that because of his uniform everybody there assumed he was just a little kid who'd probably throw a damper on the fun they were having. It probably didn't help that he was so much smaller than any of them. He was always a bit shorter then average, but these kids simply towered over him.

He did his best to ignore them and just enjoy his time away from adult supervision. He found one of his favorite games from back home and popped in a token. For the first few seconds it was the same game he was used to. But this version was harder somehow. He'd always been able to play for what seemed forever on one quarter, but this time he was dead in under a minute. He stared at the death screen in shock. From somewhere off to the side a kid not much older than himself chuckled “Don't worry kid I wasn't very good at that when I was your age either, you'll get better.”

Tom was about to inform him that he was not some little brat when he heard the voice of the attendant behind him “Excuse me son, is your mom here?”

Tom turned around to face him bewildered that he'd be asking such a question “No, she's out shopping. I don't need her to be with me every second.” He answered.

“Well you need her here, we don't allow anyone under 12 without a parent.”

“But I...” Tom thought for a second and decided that admitting to being a teenager in elementary school wasn't what he wanted to do and that nobody would believe him anyway. He sulked out of the arcade and went to wait for his mom. As he waited he began to feel the effects of the large soda. He decided to wait until he got home where he could at least try to work that cursed latch in private, or worse yet ask for help again.

He was about to give in and go search for a restroom when his mom appeared. “Hi hon, have fun?”

“Yeah I guess” Tom said before hesitating for a moment “I really need to go to the bathroom and I think...”

“Still need some help with that?”

Tom nodded as his face turned red.

“Well come on.” His mother said before leading him off in the direction of the bathroom.

The crowd had grown quite thick and Tom struggled to keep up with his mother. He felt more like a little kid than ever before trying so desperately to stay with his mom but he didn't know what else to do. Eventually the task became so difficult that she reached out her hand for Tom to take. Knowing he had little choice Tom took her hand. He took some small solace in the fact that none of his friends from back home were here to see him being led by the hand so his mom could help him go to the bathroom.

They turned a corner onto the main concourse of the mall where things were even more crowded. Tom couldn't even see where he was going, he was now simply being dragged through the throng. He felt a bolt of panic as his mother's hand slipped out of his. He tried to go around to get back to where he thought she was but he just got pushed back further and further. His need to go to the bathroom was now beyond desperate and there was little he could do to even find his way let alone undo his pants by himself. Unable to hold it any longer Tom felt his bladder release uncontrollably and the warm wetness spread through his crotch and down his leg. Looking down at his soaked pants Tom began to feel like nothing more than a lost little boy.

Tears flooded into his eyes and finally some people in the crowd took notice. “Hey are you lost” a voice from behind him asked. Tom turned around to find a girl who was maybe somewhere toward the end of her high school years leaning down at looking at him sympathetically.

Tom could only sniffle and nod.

“Well let's get you somewhere where your mom kind find you and get you into some dry pants” his new caretaker said as she took his hand. Still lightly sobbing Tom didn't know what else to do but comply. He was led over to a nearby information booth where the girl explained she'd found a lost child.

After getting his name and description the attendant at the booth made an announcement and within a few minutes Tom's mother appeared.

“Oh baby, I'm sorry I let go of your hand. I'll make sure that never happens again” she exclaimed as she bent down to give him a hug. Forgetting himself for a moment Tom returned the hug and rested his head on her shoulder taking comfort in his mother's arms. “And don't worry about hose pants. It's not your fault. Well get you into something dry at home.”

She thanked Tom's teenage rescuer for finding her boy and taking his hand in a firm grip led him back out to the car. At home she took him upstairs and helped him out of his wet things. “I want you to know that I'm not angry at you in any way. But you are going have to figure out how to undo your pants on your own. I just bought you a new bunch of pants and everything they sell here has the same thing.” Tom nodded as he got himself into the dry clothes his mother had laid out. “Now go ahead and watch your cartoons. I'll get all this in the wash for you.”

Tom couldn't believe how understanding his mother was. He couldn't believe how much he was beginning to fit the role of little boy that had been thrust on him. But he didn't want to think about any of that now, he just wanted to watch some cartoons and forget about the day.

Upstairs his mother couldn't help but notice an envelope sticking out of his backpack.

Chapter 6


As Tom sat down to dinner with his mother he could easily see she wanted to talk about something. “I saw that note from your teacher” she said casually.

Tom's stomach turned. He'd completely forgotten about it. “What did it say” he stammered trying to act as unconcerned as possible.

“Well she said your well behaved and that you try hard” she said sparing Tom the comments about how adorable he was “But she thinks you might not be ready for her class.”

That was exactly what what Tom had feared. “But I'm not even supposed to be in her class” Tom said exasperated.

“Now honey, we both know the test they gave you showed you had some catching up to do. Mrs. Sanborn says your really struggling with what the other children are learning. And maybe if you had a little less pressure you could learn how to undo your pants. ”

Tom sank into his chair. “Can't I at least have a little more time to try?” he pleaded.

“She wants to have a parent teacher conference tomorrow. We'll talk about it then. And you know I won't let anything happen that's not in your best interest right?”

“Yeah, I suppose” Tom acknowledged as he glumly went about finishing his dinner. But as he sat he felt a new sense of determination. Like never before he was committed to figuring out that hated latch and proving to everybody he really was grownup. Suddenly feeling buoyed he sat his plate in the sink and ran up to the room to begin.

He sat and struggled for several hours. Several time he almost gave up but he knew this was his last chance to prove that he didn't need to be sent to an even lower grade. Finally he did it. He knew it was odd for a 13 year-old to feel proud about being able to undress himself but he couldn't help it. Quickly he buttoned back up and tried again releasing the latch with little trouble. Like a proud toddler he called his mom in to witness his new found skill.

“I knew you'd get it. Maybe that will help convince the school to keep you in the fifth grade.” His mom said patting his head.

Tom would have ordinarily resented being patted on the head in such a manner but he was far too happy to care. And when his mom reminded him that it was nearly his new 9 O'clock bedtime he didn't feel any need to protest. His simply got into his PJs by himself and went to bed finally feeling at least a little grownup.

At school the next day Tom was still confused by the lessons but he was beginning to think that if he could figure out the latch he could figure out this stuff too.  Even when class ended and his mother and the principal came in to discuss his future he felt very confident.

Tom took a seat next to his mother and waited as the adults exchanged greeting. “Now down to business” Mrs Sanborn began “One of my biggest concerns is that Tommy doesn't seem to be able to handle undressing himself to use the restroom.”

“But I figured it out” Tommy interrupted. He stood up and began to demonstrate his new found skill. He felt a little ridiculous doing this in front of three people but he know it was necessary. But something was wrong, he did exactly what he did the night before but the latch didn't come undone.

“I did it last night, I don't know why it isn't working. Maybe it's broken or something” He said feeling a bit of panic.

“Tommy hon” Mrs. Sanborn said “They all work differently. Every pair has it's own combination if you want to call it that. And most of them have a little computer chip in them that rearranges the way it works every day.”

Tommy looked at her like she was insane. “But why? Why do they even put these on here?”

Tommy could only keep looking at her in shock as she went into an explanation he could barely understand. All he could manage to figure out was that it had something to do with promoting neurological development.

Tommy fell back into his chair wondering how he'd ever figure out all the different latches, especially when some of them even changed. He barely paid attention as the three adults went about discussing his readiness for the fifth grade.

“Well” the principal said “What I'm going to do for now is put Tommy in the third grade and we'll see if we need to something more drastic.”

“Third grade?” Tom said in disbelief “Can't you just send me back one grade?”

“Don't worry you'll have a chance to work your way back” the principal reassured him “But as part of that we're going to expect you to take care of your own clothing. We think in a setting were your won't struggle so much with school you'll be able to learn to handle that on your own.”
 

On the ride back Tom barely spoke a word. In the back seat sat his new uniform, a similar shirt with a pair of short pants and suspenders. The shirt had the name “Tommy” sewn neatly into it. His mother was clearly thinking hard about something and that suited him just fine, he didn't want to talk about this anymore.

Suddenly he noticed she was turning into the parking lot of the local supermarket. “Mom” he finally spoke up “Can't we just go straight home today?”

“I'm just going to get one thing, now come along with me.”

“I'm just going to stay in the car and listen to the radio.”

“Don't you remember how you got lost in the mall? I just want to keep a close eye on you.”

Tom sighed and got out of the car. As he began to step out into the traffic lane he felt her grab his arm. Looking up at her and noticing the seriousness in her face he quickly acquiesced and took her hand.

Inside the store he paid little attention to where his mother was going as he followed her and nursed his wounded pride. Finally she stopped and he looked up at the bright packages lining the store's diaper aisle. He watched in silent horror as his mother placed a package boy's Pull-Ups into the cart.

“Mom please” he began to plead not thinking how he was clearly identifying himself as the intended wearer “I promise I'll try really hard, I don't need to wear diapers.”

“These aren't diapers honey, I don't think you need those yet. But I can't have you coming home in wet pants every day.”

He opened his mouth again to protest but was cut short. “I've already made my decision. As soon as you show that you can use the potty you can wear underwear again.”

He began to speak again but quickly thought better of it.

“Do you understand?” She asked.

Yes.” Tom replied meekly.

“Good boy” She said stroking his head. “I have a feeling this will work out in the end.”

 

Chapter 7

 

When they returned home they both went straight to Tom's room to get him into his training pants. After being helped out of his pants Tom quickly grabbed a Pull-Up from the open bag. He was in no hurry to start wearing them but he at least wanted the dignity of putting them on himself. He looked at the brightly colored thing he held in his hands and a bevy of cartoon characters smiled eagerly back at him. He didn't recognize any of them but they were clearly meant to appeal to preschoolers.

“The little stripe goes in back.” His mother helpfully pointed out.

Seeing no reason to delay further Tom pulled his brand new pants into place. They weren't like real underwear the way the ads said. They were obviously thicker. Tom try to reassure himself that this wasn't a diaper, but he knew it was close.

His mother held out his pants for him to step into. “Now I'm not going to help you with this anymore except for getting you dressed. You'll learn how to do it yourself, you just need to try. And if you have an accident just let me or the school nurse know and we'll help you get into a new Pull-Up. OK?”

Tom couldn't believe the words he was hearing. It was his Pull-Up and he was going to need help from grown ups changing into a new one. He could only nod his acquiescence.

“Good boy. Now go watch TV and I'll get dinner ready” giving him a pat on the bottom.

As dinner approached his bladder began to strain. He'd made a few attempts at the button but quit in frustration. Now the need was getting dire. He walked the the bathroom, every step felt like it could shake loose the flood gates. He struggled again, twisting and pulling at the strange device. But control slipped away from him. This time there were no wet pants, just the damp heaviness of his training pants.

“Tommy, dinner's ready!” He no longer took note of the name. How could he tell his mother he'd wet his Pull-Up after just a few hours of having it on?

He crept into the kitchen still unsure what to say.

“Hey honey. How's your Pull-Up doing?” she asked with an unnerving amount of casual directness.

“Oh... It's still fine.” Tom said looking down.

“Are you sure” she said trying to catch his gaze.

“Yea...Yeah”

She crossed her arms and looked him directly in the eyes “Do I have to check?”

“Alright, I sort of had an accident.”

“I thought so. Let's go get you into a dry one.” She began to lead him back to his room. “You need to tell me if you have an accident. You could get a rash if you don't changed soon enough.”

Once in his room he was relieved of his shoes and pants. “Dry as a bone” his mother commented as she quickly inspected his pants. “Looks like we won't have to worry about leaks.” Tom started to remove his Pull-Up. “Oh honey let me get that, you don't know where to put it” she lowered the sodden thing and helped him step out of it before tossing it in a pail that had taken up residence near his bed. “I'm sorry sweety, I forgot to buy wipes hold on a sec'. She left for the bathroom and returned with a wet cloth in hand.

“Mom, please let me do this” he pleaded.

She thought for a moment and handed him the cloth. “OK, but if I notice you aren't cleaning up well enough I'm going to do it myself.”

Tom breathed a sigh of relief and washed himself as thoroughly as he could manage before stepping into a new Pull-Up and getting dressed again. He went downstairs again for dinner and tried to content himself with this one measure of maturity he was still allowed.

Eventually his bedtime came and all he could think about was getting out of his new juvenile underpants. He rushed to remove the Pull-Up on his own as his mother dropped his clothes in the hamper. “Is that dry” she asked as he walked over to the pail.

“Yes, it's totally dry” he said.

She leaned over and took it from his hand. “Just let me see” she said gently but with a pronounced sense of maternal authority as she took it from his hand. “Yep, dry as can be. Good job” she said as she deposited in the pail. “Why don't you try to go use the potty before bed OK?”

“But mom, I don't need to. And would you stop saying potty. Just cause I've had a few accidents cause of these stupid buttons...”

She raised an eyebrow and Tom relented. Without any impediments he was able handle his business on his own for once. When he came back he found his mom holding another Pull-Up.

“Mom, I don't need one of those. I don't wet the bed. I just have accidents sometimes.”

“I want you to wear one at night for a while just in case. Especially if you're going to be so unwilling to use the potty before bed.”

Tom moaned again and slid himself into his nighttime Pull-Up and got into his PJs.. He was tucked into bed with a good night kiss and drifted off to sleep.

 

Chapter 8

 

Tom could hear his mother already up getting things ready for the day as he slowly came awake. He felt the still unfamiliar snug padding beneath his pajamas and recalled the previous day. As he reached down to feel the front of them he found himself dry and wondered how he'd come to even doubt it.

The door slowly opened and his mother peeked in. “Good morning sweety, did you sleep OK?”

“Yeah I guess.”

“Good” she sat down as his bed “Still dry?”

“Of course” Tom said almost managing to sound like nothing else could have even crossed his mind.

“Good boy” she said softly ruffling his hair “I just wanted to explain a few things about today since there's a lot of new things happening. I'm going to put some of your Pull-Ups in your backpack. When you get to school I want you to go to the office and give them to the nurse, she'll keep them in a cabinet for you. After that one of the office ladies will show you where your new classroom is. Do you think you can handle that by yourself or do you want me to go with you?”

“Mom, that stuff is really simple. I'm not really some little kid. I can handle it.”

“Of course your a big boy” she said chucking him under the chin “I just want to make sure your comfortable with all these changes.”

“Thanks mom, but I'm sure I can do it on my own.”

“Just remember you can have the office call me if you need anything. Now get a shower and I'll get your clothes out.” Tom grumbled to himself as he got out of bed. “And remember to put your Pull-Up in the pail.”

Seeing that she wasn't going anywhere he got out of his PJs and dumped his training pants in the pail. He saw her watching closely to make sure it really was dry.

The shower gave him a rare few moments of privacy and independence. He had a small shower radio that hung from the nozzle. He turned the knob until he zeroed in on a faint and distant station playing something that sounded like what a teenager ought to be listening to. He closed his eyes and tried to take it all in. But somehow it seemed wrong, like something from a place he didn't belong.

He turned off the shower, grabbed his towel, and returned to his room. He found his mother waiting for him with his new school clothes in her lap.

“I almost forgot” she said “The latches on these need to be done when you put them on too. It's supposed to help more with neurological development. It's not supposed to help as much in the later grades so they use a different kind.”

Tom stood in shock as she held out his Pull-Ups for him to step into. “You mean you're going to get me dressed too?”

“It's not a big deal honey, it's just until you learn how to do it yourself.”

He sighed and put one foot and then another into his training pants and his mother soon had him in his brand new school uniform.

“You look nice” she smiled as she made a few adjustments.

Tom looked down at the hopelessly juvenile clothes he'd just been helped into and wondered what his friends back home would think. Even as a real third grader he'd never had been caught dead in short pants and suspenders. “I look like a baby” he complained.

“No you don't. Those are perfectly fine clothes for a lit...” she cleared her throat “I mean big boy. You just have to get used to them is all.”

Later that morning he was again dropped off at Kiddie Town Daycare. He slumped into his usual seat and glared at the floor. “Hey Tommy” shouted an excited voice.

He looked up and saw Johnny smiling at him once again. “How come you're wearing one of the younger kid's uniforms?” Johnny asked “And how come you never told me your name before?” He asked pointing at the name stitched in his shirt.

“I'm wearing this because... well because the teachers are all stupid. And I didn't tell you my name because I don't want to be friends with a big dumb baby.”

Johnny rolled his eyes “I was just asking some questions, jeez.”

Tom looked down again feeling a bit embarrassed by his outburst. He looked up again and saw Johnny walking back to rejoin his friends. He thought almost spoke up again to apologize but held back. In time his bus came and took him to back Sunny Brook.

He walked into the office and up to the desk. “I'm supposed to give some stuff to the nurse and then I have to go to a... uh... different class room.” He explained.

“Oh you must be the boy whose going into the third grade. Tommy Welton right?”

Tom just nodded “Yes, could I just see the nurse and get this over with please?”

“I'm sure you're excited to get to your new class dear, but there's just a few things we need to do first” She took out a form from beneath her desk. “Now what is your P.A.T. Number?”

Tom look at her dumbfounded “I don't even know what that is.”

“Oh a big boy like you must remember that.” She said expectantly.

Tom just shook his head.

“See if he has one of those big yellow cards” suggested one of the other secretaries “They usually give them to the Kindergarteners but he may have one too.”

“I don't have one of those. Can't we just do this later?” Tom pleaded.

“We can just skip that part for now” She looked further down the form “OK, are you a N.E.C.P student?”

Tom blinked “I don't know what that is either.”

The secretary just shook her head a bit “That's OK hon, we'll just call your mother. She'll know all this. Just go have a seat over there.” She said motioning to a row of seats behind him.

Tom sighed and sat down. His legs dangled from the enormous chair as his mom was called to take care of the process for him. He didn't understand much of what they talked about except for the part about how cute he was in his uniform. After a few minutes she hung up the phone and walked over to him.

“There we go hon, all taken care of. Your mother asked me to make sure you didn't forget about your pullups.”

Tom gasped a bit “She told you about that?”

She smiled bemusedly “It's no big deal. Just hand them to me and I'll take them over to Nurse Carlson.”

Tom sighed and tried as discreetly as he could to retrieve them from his backpack and hand them over. He watched as she went a short way down the hall and sat them down on a table just outside a door. “Debra” she called into the room “these diapers are for Tommy Welton. I'll just leave them right here.”

She walked back over to him “Now let's get you over to Mrs. Taylor's class.”

Tom trotted along behind her wondering if he'd even be able to make it as a third grader. Mrs. Taylor's class was just getting underway when they came through the door. “Sorry we're late, we had a few details to go over with his mom.” she explained.

“Oh you must be Tommy” the tall and slightly graying woman at the front of the class beamed “We were waiting for you. You can have your seat right next to Johnny and we'll begin.”

Tom looked over at the empty seat right next to the kid he only knew as some persistent runt from the daycare. He took a breath and sat down. Johnny smiled and whispered “Hey, maybe we can be friends after all.” Tom just ignored him.

“Class this is Tommy Welton. He's new here and I want you all to give him a good welcome. You're in luck today Tommy. We're going to be going over gravitational lensing which should be review from the second grade so you won't have much catching up to for today.”

Tom could only stare as an elementary school teacher once again patiently explained concepts that he couldn't even grasp, every now and then she'd jot some alien word on the blackboard. “Now” she said with one firm clap of her hands “I think we're ready for a little pop quiz.”

As the children around him groaned in disappointment Tom began to panic. He didn't want to be sent back any further but he was sure to be found out as having no idea what was going on now. As the quiz sheets were passed around the room he could only hope that it would at least be a true-false quiz. But when they pale blue sheet landed on the desk in front of him he didn't even know where to begin. He sat, pencil in hand, frozen. While the teacher turned her back to help another student he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see Johnny discreetly tilting his already completed quiz toward him. He quickly jotted down the answers and sat down his pencil just before Mrs. Taylor turned back around.

The quizzes were collected and Mrs. Taylor went to her desk to grade them, instructing the class to begin reading chapter 9. Tom leaned over and whispered to Johnny “Thanks. You really saved my life. I'm sorry about being mean to you, I'm just sort having trouble with teachers and stuff.”

“No problem” Johnny whispered back “Wanna play at recess.”

Tom hesitated but he decided it might be for the best to just try and fit in. “Alright, I guess I can see what you guys do around here.

Johnny beamed “Cool.”

Once recess came Johnny led the way out a series of squares and circles painted on the blacktop. They soon joined by two other boys Tom recognized from his new class. “Tommy, this is Scott and Kyle. We usually play Boxes and Circles at recess.”

“I don't think I've ever heard of that” Tom said.

“Oh it's really easy” Johnny said before launching into a long and intricate explanation.

“Oh OK” Tom said scratching his head. “I guess I can try to learn.”

“Great, just ask if you get confused we all play this a lot so we can help.”

Tom stepped into one of the squares as he was instructed and watched some of the initial play before the ball came bouncing his way. Thinking he'd gotten the hang of it he jumped to catch it.

“No catchies” explained Kyle “That's minus five points for Tommy.”

The rest of recess went on in much the same way with Tom losing points and the other boys displaying obvious patience for their new playmate. By the time the bell rang he was far behind, despite his wounded pride he felt relieved to have finally had a little bit of fun and make friends. Even if he was being treated like an interloping little brother he felt like he was beginning to find a place here.

As he sat down at his desk he realized he'd been so focused on his game he hadn't noticed his growing need to use the bathroom. It was nearly an hour and a half to lunch and he already very much needed to go. He hesitated at first but as the strain in his bladder grew and the clock slowed he raised his hand.

“Yes Tommy, do you have a question?” Mrs. Taylor said pausing her lecture.

“I really have to go to the bathroom.”Tom nearly begged.

She thought for a moment “We usually expect our students to tend to themselves during recess but I'll let you go just this once.”

Tom thanked her and quickly walked to the door. Outside he began to run as fast as his overflowing bladder would allow but this time he didn't even make it to the end of the hallway. He'd nearly forgotten abut his Pull-Up, now it was sodden and heavy, there was only enough dampness to remind him of his accident.

He paused and thought. If he went to the nurse right away everyone would surely know something was wrong, Mrs. Taylor might even ask what took him so long in front of everybody. He waited a reasonable amount of time and walked back to class.

When the lunch finally came he nearly sprang from his seat in his eagerness to get out of his clammy training pants. “Hey Tommy” called Johnny “Don't you want to eat lunch with us?”

Tom turned back around “Oh yeah! I just have to do some... stuff first. I'll see you guys in a few minutes.” Johnny just shrugged as Tom sped off to the office.

He paused at the nurses door. She was busy refreshing her supplies. She was obviously younger than

most of the staff, though still very much an adult to Tom's eyes. Tom stood and watched her. He struggled to find the words he needed to say. Before he could say a word she caught him at the edge of her vision and gave him a energetic smile “Hey there Tommy” She said bending down to face him at eye level.

“Did you have another accident hon?” she said sympathetically.

“Yeah, kind of.”

She put a hand on his shoulder “Well let's get you into something dry then.” She walked over to a drawer on the other side of the room, retrieved one of his Pull-Ups, and sat it down on the examination table.

“Do you need some help with those pants?” She asked.

Tom just nodded and she effortlessly undid them and pulled them down to his ankles. She began to help him out of his wet Pull-Ups. “Do you like the Cartoonimals?” She said noting the design.

“Huh?”

“You know The Cartonimals. Cartoon animals. Lots of kids around here watch them every day.”

“Oh uh, my mom just sort of picked them out for me. I didn't even know what they were.”

“Well they're very cute” she said as she pulled out a fresh wipe.

“I do that myself” Tom interjected.

“I was just thinking I should talk to your mother about that” she said as she cleaned her new patient with expert care “You're already getting a little red. She might be a little more thorough.” she tossed the wipe into a nearby waste basket. “Don't you feel better already.”

Tom nodded bashfully.

“I thought so” she said holding out the fresh pair of training pants.

She helped him back into his clothes. “There you go, all nice and dry.” She adjusted his suspenders and stood back up “Now don't forget to come here as soon as you have accident. I don't want to have come checking up on you.”

“Thanks. I will” Tom stammered.

“Now go play with you friends.” She shooed him out the door.

He rushed to join his friends at lunch. “Hey Tommy. Your just in time” Johnny said “We were just talking about Hegelian dialectics. Scott says that negations come from outside the matter being discussed. I say that they're inherent and internal. What do you think?”

Tom looked back and forth between them blankly. “I uh... agree with what you said” he nodded and said to Johnny.

He picked over his lunch while the others continued their discussion. He felt like a little kid at a grown-up dinner party.

As the afternoon wore on Tom couldn't believe how much he had to catch up on just to be in the third grade. Hardly anything made sense to him. When class was finally dismissed he quickly began to gather his things so he could escape and at least have a chance at enjoying the weekend. But Mrs. Taylor called him over to her desk.

“Tommy, I can't help but notice you looked a little confused today. Are you having trouble keeping up with the class?”

“No, it's just that there's some new stuff here I didn't learn before.”

She nodded “I thought that might be the case” she reached into a drawer beneath her desk “We usually use these in the lower grades but it might help.” She sat a brown teddy bear down on the desk. “This is an Interactive Learning Teddy” she explained “It comes loaded with some games to help you learn some of the more basic material. And it even plays lessons while you sleep. It's very effective. I've already talked to your mother and told her all about it. She sounded very excited about trying it.”

Tom stared at the toy for a while. “Well I guess I can try” he said said resignedly. He picked it up and tried to put in his backpack but it wouldn't fit. So he thanked his teacher and made is way to meet his mother, teddy bear clutched firmly in his hand.

Chapter 9

Tom climbed into the passenger seat and started to toss his things in the back while his mother greeted him enthusiastically. “Hi honey! Where did you get the teddy bear.”

Tom sighed “Mrs. Taylor gave it to me” he said flatly “It's supposed to help with learning or something.”

His mom retrieved it from the back seat and admired it for a moment “Well that was very nice of her. You'll have to think of a name for him.” She handed the bear back to her son. “One of our new neighbors invited us over for dinner so we'll just go home real quick before we head over there.”

“Do I really have to go too? Couldn't you just order a pizza for me or something?”

She began to pull out of the parking lot “There's no way I could find a babysitter in time. You'll be fine.”

“But I don't need a babysitter.” He said as defiantly as he could.

The car came to a stop at a red light and she looked him right in his eyes “Honey, even if I thought you were big enough you'd still need somebody help you if you have an accident.”

Tom tried to stammer a response.

“If your a good boy tonight we'll go see a movie. You can even pick”

“Alright” He acquiesced.

Karen smiled and mussed his hair. “I knew you'd come around. They have a teenage daughter, maybe you two could play video games or something.”

Tom arrived at the Lyndens' front door with his face freshly scrubbed and hair neatly combed courtesy of his mother's tending. She rang the doorbell and reached down to adjust his bangs once more. “You look very nice.”

Mrs. Lynden greeted them both at the door and ushered them inside As they entered the dining room room Tom wondered why his mother had mentioned the daughter but not the younger child for whom a a bright red plastic booster seat had been set up at the far end of the table.

“I've set up two places for you and Tommy over there” Mrs. Lyndon said pointing towards the childish thing.

Knowing he was expected to be on his best behavior Tom stifled his complaint and tried to settle himself into his designated seat. Without a word he felt his mother's hands at his sides lift him up the last little bit and place him in the booster before sliding the chair back into place.

The floor was now well out the reach of his dangling feet and he realized he'd need help again to get down. As this helpless situation dawned on him he looked at the place setting in front of him. Among the neat white plates and shiny silverware sat his plastic plate decorated with some now familiar cartoon characters.

Mrs. Lynden saw his surprise and smiled. “Nurse Carlson at your school is a very good friend of mine. We just happened to be talking today and she said how much you like the Cartonimals.”

He wanted to protest that he hadn't even known what they were until she pointed them out on his pull-ups. But that wasn't a topic he wanted to bring up. “Thank you.” he managed.

“That was very thoughtful of you Susan.” His mother said as she sat down.

The doorbell rang again and Mrs. Lynden excused herself to answer the door.

“You being very good, just keep it up and we'll go see that movie tomorrow.” Karen said.

Mrs. Lynden brought two more guests into the living room.

“Karen, Tommy this is Bill and Theresa Burnette from down the street.” She turned to the new arrivals “And this is Karen Welton and her little boy Tommy.”

The adults exchanged hellos and Bill, a heavy-set broad-shouldered man with thin graying hair gave Tom a soft playful punch on the shoulder “How you doing there slugger? Enjoying your new school?”

“It's fine I guess” Tom replied trying to avoid the subject.

“Haley” Mrs. Lynden called up the stairs. “Everybody's here. Would you mind helping me set the table.”

A poised confident looking girl came in and graciously introduced herself. She was probably only a few years older than Tom but, but in contrast to his early grade-school uniform, had dressed for the get together in appropriately formal but still fashionable for a teenager clothes. After another round of introductions she went into the kitchen to help her mother bring out the food.

With everybody settled in dinner was served. Almost everything was well out of Tom's reach so his mother prepared his plate for him and sat it down. Conversation around the table mostly drifted around adult topics that had little understanding of or interest in though Haley kept up with them quite nicely.

Once dessert was out of the way Mrs. Lynden announced that coffee was avalable. “Tommy, we have some video games you might like. Do you want to go with Haley while you chat some more?” Eager to escape the boring adult chit-chat and hangout with somebody around his won age he nodded enthusiastically. As his mother pulled his chair away from the table he avoided anymore assistance by jumping down out of his chair. “Looks like somebody's excited to get some playtime” Mrs Burnette observed “Sorry about boring you with our grown-up stuff honey.”

Tom followed Haley down the hallway and into a spacious room with a couch and some beanbag chairs arranged around a TV. A small chest brightly labeled “toys” sat in one corner.

“I thought you guys didn't have any other kids here.” Tom said looking puzzled.

“We don't. This is just where my mom and I watch the kids we babysit.” Haley replied as she sat down on the couch and picked up a magazine. “All the video games are in the basket next the TV, you can play whatever you want.”

“But I thought...” Tom looked back at her engrossed in her fashion magazine. He realized she wasn't here to hang out with him, he knew his place in this arrangement. With a sigh he sat on the brightly colored carpet and turned on the video game system.

He didn't really care what was in it. Just that it would distract him from his predicament. As it turned out he'd started something called Floppy Bunny's Big Adventure. He'd never heard of it before and the cutesy graphics didn't seem appealing. This was obviously just a game for little kids but he tried it anyway and became engrossed. He struggled at first but slowly adapted to the challenge. The urgent prodding of his bladder went almost unnoticed.

Tom suddenly become aware of the direness of his situation and shot to his feet. “Where's your restroom?” He asked, straining to keep himself dry.

“Oh just down the hall” Haley answered “You don't need any help, do you?”

Tom barely gave it a thought, he couldn't bare asking for help from somebody who should have been his peer. He took off quickly down the hall and began the familiar struggle with his buttons. It was to no avail though, and his training pants were once again the only thing keeping his pants dry.

He sulked out to the dining room and whispered in his mother's ear. She stood up and retrieved her purse from beneath the table. “Excuse us for a second, we just have a little something to attend to” she said as she began leading Tom back to the bathroom.

Once again he was stripped down to his pull-up. She kept a calm demeanor but Tom could tell that constantly getting him undressed was beginning to be a chore. He wondered if a new solution might be in store. She pulled a baby wipe from her purse. “The school nurse said you might need some help with this sweety, so stand still.”

Tom hung his head slightly while he was cleaned up. Next she retrieved a fresh pull-up. “Now I only brought one spare. So we should probably go home soon.”

The lingered at their neighbor's house only a little while longer. Karen thanked her hosts their hospitality and thanked Haley for her help as well. She and Tom headed back home.

When bedtime came around Tom was helped out of his clothes. His mother started to get a night time pull-up ready for him but he couldn't help but protest. “Mom, I was dry all last night. Please. Just let me try one night without a pull-up.”

She paused an looked at him. “Well you did wake up dry. And you were a very good boy tonight at the Lynden's.” She thought for a moment “OK, we'll try going without a pull-up tonight.”

Tom breathed a sigh of relief “Thank you, thank you.” He gave his mother a big hug.

She smiled and patted him on the back “But you have to sleep with you bear tonight, that's going to help you at school. And if you're wet in the morning I don't want any more complaining about wearing a pull-up at night. Understand?”

Tom nodded “I promise” and pulled his PJs up. He was finally feeling like a big kid again. He took his bear and placed it next to his pillow before climbing into bed.

“Good night honey, sweet dreams.” She said as she turned out the light.

“Good night mom.”

As he lay in the darkness he could hear a strange soft humming coming his teddy bear. It was like nothing he'd heard before but soft and soothing. Before long he had drifted into a very, very deep sleep.

 

Chapter 10

In his dreams Tom walked through a forest beside a babbling brook. He came a a clearing and found a large wooden table stacked with candy. At the head of the table was his teddy bear. “Come Tommy. Sit with me.” He felt almost like he was floating right into a chair besides his teddy.

Everything was vivid and real. He could even feel damp grass beneath his bare feet. He looked down and saw he was wearing his pajamas. “Where am I?” he asked.

“You're in Teddy Bear Forrest of course” said the bear.

Tom glanced up and saw clouds forming in the sky. He started to get up.

“No you need to stay here” said the bear. “The more time you spend here the better you'll do in school. Here have some tea.” The bear reached over and poured some tea into a cup that has suddenly appeared. He poured it to the very top of the brim and small trickle ran down the side.

Before Tom could say another thing the clouds above him opened up and he was drenched by the falling rain.

His room was bright and sunny. He could hear his mother coming from down the hall. For a moment he couldn't understand how the rain had gotten inside, how it had soaked him in his bed. But then he remembered.

The door opened and his mother stepped in. “Good morning hon, how are you doing?”

Tom just looked down at the wetness between his legs. “I'm sorry mom. I really tried.”

“Oh no.” She said as she sat down on the side of his bed and embraced him. “It's OK baby, it's not your fault. Just go get showered and we'll talk about what movie you want to go see.”

“Tom's mood brightened slightly “You mean we're still going to do that?”

“I don't see why not. Now go get cleaned up and I'll take care of your sheets.”

Later as she pulled into the movie theater parking lot Karen asked one last time “Are you sure you want to see this movie? It's supposed to be really scary.”

“Mom, I can totally handle it. I'm not really some little kid.”

“We can still go to the Floppy Bunny movie, Haley said you really liked that video game.”

“You said I could pick the movie and I want to see Ghost Invaders.”

“OK, but if you start getting too scared I'm marching you right out of that theater.”

They bought their tickets and Tom strode confidently to his seat. All he had to, he thought, was sit through one dumb movie and he'd convince his mother that he wasn't a total baby. This lights dimmed, the film rolled, and the screen came alive with images more vivid than he'd imagined.

Theaters back home weren't like this. The movie wasn't 3D but he could almost swear the pictures were coming off the screen. Every rustle of leaves, every footstep, every sinister growl sounded like it was right behind him. He could almost feel the breath on the back of his neck.

Without thinking about it he sought out his mother's hand to hold his own. In his horror he inched closer to her, instinctively seeking her protection. Finally he couldn't bare to look at the screen any longer and buried his face in her shoulder.

Suddenly he felt himself lifted from his seat. Gentle hands cradled his back and bottom before his feet finally found the ground again in the brightly lit lobby.

“It's OK baby it's just a movie” she said stroking his chin.

“I know. It was just really... scary I guess.”

She wiped the fearful tears from his cheek. “Do you see why I thought Floppy Bunny might be better?”

He nodded.

“How's your pull-up doing? Did you have an accident?”

Tom became aware of a familiar dampness. “Maybe”

Karen took her son's hand and led him to the baby changing room. Tom was still too shaken to do anymore than go along. She lowered his pants and checked his pull-up. She began untying his shoes.

“I'm sorry Mom” He said “I just wanted to show you I wasn't a baby”

“I know you want to be a big boy” She replied while she helped him out of his pants.”But just remember that it's OK to be little too.”

She cleaned him up and got him back into dry pants. “I have few errands I need to do. Do you feel OK enough to come along? We could get stop at the ice-cream place at the mall if you'd like.”

Tom nodded “That sounds OK.”

“Come on then.” She took his hand and they walked back the car.

The mall parking lot was packed. Tom remembered their last visit and looked around nervously.

“Don't worry” his mother said while she searched for a place to park “I'll make sure you don't lost again.”

She found a spot at edge of the lot and opened the trunk. Tom watched as she retrieved something from the trunk, unfolded it, and sat it on the ground in front of him. He couldn't believe what he was looking at. She rolled a stroller back and forth a few times to get the wheels straight. “Hop in sweety. I'd like to start shopping before the lines get any longer.”

“But that's for babies.” Tom said incredulously.

His mother adopted a patient but slightly sterner tone. “It's for children who have trouble keeping up with their mothers. You remember what happened last time right?”

“Yeah, but...” Tom stopped himself. It was just getting harder and harder to argue that he could by in this strange place without being treated the way he was.

“I'm know how this must look to you but I also know this is better for you. If we have to turn around and go back home there will be consequences.”

Without further protest he settled himself into the stroller. It wasn't awkward and uncomfortable like he'd expected, instead he was nicely accommodated among the babyish designs of the stroller.

“I knew you'd be a good boy. Let's go get you some ice-cream.”

Securely within his mother's charge Tom was pushed into the thronging mall and to a small ice-cream stand near the entrance. He really just wanted to make as few stops as possible, but he couldn't pass up the scoop Triple Chocolate Fudge he was offered. He ate greedily, enjoying the treat so much he nearly forgot his situation. And with the rich desert settled satisfyingly in his stomach and the steady pace of his mother's pushing he began to feel drowsy.

His stroller came to a stop outside a clothing store. His mother knelt down beside him with a baby wipe in her hand and cleaned a stray bit of chocolate from the edge of his mouth. She saw the heaviness in his eyes, she smiled and smoothed his hair. “You can have a little nap if you want honey, I'm just going to be shopping for a while.” She resumed navigating her son through the crowd as he slowly felt himself drift off to sleep.

He heard his mother's voice somewhere nearby as he came back to reality.

“I've thought about it. I'm just not sure yet. It would be a lot easier than taking off his pants every time though.”

“I'm sure you'll make the best decision for him.” An unfamiliar woman's voice answered “Either way he's simply adorable in his little stroller.”

He opened his eyes and glanced around. He was parked next to his mother in a small cafe. The unfamiliar voice belonged to an happy looking round faced woman.

“Look who's waking up.” she said “Hi there Tommy, your mother and I have just been chatting.”

His mother looked over at him. “Hon, this is Mrs. Kerner, she lives in our neighborhood.”

Tom squirmed a bit, realizing the women had been talking about him. “Oh, uh... hi.”

“Are you still dry?” his mom inquired.

“I think so.”

“Are you sure? You were out like a light?”

“Mom I only wet the be... I mean I'm sure.”

“OK then, I won't check as long as your sure. I think it's time to start heading home now anyway.”

Karen paid for her coffee and said goodbye Mrs. Kerner before taking Tom back out to the car and driving back home.

Tom went straight to his room and flopped onto the bed. He'd hoped a weekend away from school would be a chance to be his own age for two days. But he just kept getting treated like a little kid everywhere he went. Worse than that it all seemed necessary.

Absentmindedly he began fiddling with a button on the front of his teddy bear. It's eyes lit up and a speaker hidden within emitted a soft happy song. “Would you like to play the Algebra game with me?” chirped the bear.

Tom turned the bear over, looking for someway to start the game. After a minute he looked around to make sure nobody was watching. “Yes” he almost whispered into the bear.

“Oh good” said the bear “I've been waiting a long time to play with you.”

Tom found the answer and response style of the game immediately intuitive and, for once, the subject matter was something he was at least a little bit familiar. He became engrossed that he didn't notice his mother at the doorway.

“Good to see you enjoying your teddy.”

Tom tried to compose himself “It's OK. I was just sort of bored I guess.”

“I was just going to remind you to try using the potty. You haven't had an accident yet have you?”

Tom's eye's widened and he sprinted past his mother and to the bathroom. Even without the disadvantage of his button being to difficult for him it would have been nearly too late. Fatefully he had another accident.

He returned to his mother to get cleaned up and changed.

“You can stay up a little while longer” she said tossing his pants into the hamper and starting to help him with his shirt. “But it's getting close to your bedtime so I want to get you into your jammies now.”

With the sun barely down Tom was dressed in his night clothes. He spent the rest of the evening watching TV until he was tucked into bed after having his Pull-Up checked and found dry. His mother turned out the light on her way out and darkness fell across his room.

Memories of the movie flooded back. Every shadow seemed to be a ghost and the world beyond his darkened window was cold and foreboding. He took his teddy from it's place near his pillow and held it against his chest. As though sensing his fear it began to play a soft soothing lullaby. He hugged it tighter.

Chapter 11

After a second night of teddy inspired dreams he woke up wet again, this time protected by his training pants. It became a familiar pattern over the next few days. Tom felt himself slipping further and further towards babyhood and it seemed like he could do nothing about it. One evening he noticed his mother searching the Internet for diaper sizes.

On Wednesday morning Tom walked into his third grade class to find Johnny and some of his classmates discussing a new arcade that had opened not too far from school. Everybody, it seemed, had gotten permission from their parents to go after school.

“Hey Tommy are you coming too?” Johnny asked.

“I don't know” Tom said hesitantly thinking of being stuck alone in his Pull-Ups.

“Come on, at least ask if you can come.”

A light came on in his head. This was a way to demonstrate maturity. He could just make his way without any grown-ups around and then they'd all know he was really big. No more holding hands, and certainly no more strollers.

He nodded “OK I'll call her at recess.”

The day's baffling lessons hardly seemed to matter anymore. His plan was in place. He Johnny, and some other kids would walk a few blocks to the city bus stop, ride just a few stops and visit the arcade. He could almost hear his mom telling him how wrong she'd been.

At recess he went to the office with Johnny and Kyle in tow and asked to call his mother at work.

“Hey mom” he began “Me and some friends want to go to a new arcade after school. Can I go?”

“That sounds like it would take an awful lot of responsibility Tommy. I don't know if...”

“Please” he begged “I won't be alone or anything.”

He heard her inhale deeply “OK. But only for half an hour, I'll pick you up there. And you have to stay with you're friends the entire time. And you absolutely have to go to the nurse before you leave, even if you don't feel wet I want her to make sure.”

They were restrictive terms but they were more freedom than he'd had in ages. “Thank you mom.” Tom gushed “I promise I'll do everything you said.”

The rest of the day seemed to glide right by as Tom imagined what other new privileges he'd soon be winning for himself. After the bell rang his group began to make their way to the bus stop. Tom tried to think of an excuse to run to the nurses office but nothing came to mind. He resolved to keep up with his group. He'd only had a small accident, and it was only going to be a half hour.

At the stop Tom peered at the vast array of signs, tables, and maps. “Are you guys sure you know where you're going?” He asked.

“Of course” Kyle replied “We don't even have to change buses.”

“Yeah, I guess it is pretty simple” Tom said nervously as he resolved to try to follow his friends as closely as possible.

The bus rolled up and his friends quickly squeezed themselves into the crowded vehicle. Tom searched for a spot but couldn't even find a place to stand.

“Just get on the next one” Johnny suggested “It's just a minute. We'll wait for you.”

Tom gulped and stepped back down to the empty bus stop. He watched his friends wave as the bus thundered off. He looked around and briefly contemplated walking back to school to call his mom again but he wasn't even sure of the way back. As his panic rose another bus lumbered to a stop. Still feeling lost and confused he climbed on and a took a seat. The bus shuddered away from the stop and immediately took an unexpected turn.

After a trip of what seemed like miles Tom got off at the next stop and scrambled to find the bus back. The signs offered nothing but a tangle of arrows, dots, and numbers so he just got on the next bus that seemed to be going the other way. But soon he was riding through completely unfamiliar streets.

His half-hour of freedom came and went and he was still desperately lost, his bladder bulged again. He no longer cared at all about the arcade he just wanted to be at home with his mom. He decided to abandon his attempts at navigation while he searched for a restroom. He found one near the entrance of a park and darted in. He fumbled with his button briefly but soon the familiar sensation of wetness came gushing. His already wet Pull-Up could hold no more and soaked the front of his short pants. He stepped back outside, tears already in his eyes. As the sun began to sink below the horizon he sat down on a lonely bench, put his head in his hands, and cried.

He heard a car come to a screeching halt and looked up.

“Tommy! I've been looking everywhere for you!” He heard his mother exclaim as she ran from her car.

“Mommy!” The word simply burst out of him.

They embraced each other tightly.

“My baby, I was so worried. Nurse Carlson called to say you hadn't come by. So I went to the arcade and couldn't find you. I'm just happy you're OK.”

“I'm sorry mommy” the word came out again through heaving sobs “Please don't be mad.”

“I'm not mad baby, I shouldn't have let you have so much responsibility. You should have gone to see Nurse Carlson before you left but” she looked at the wet spot running down his school uniform “That really doesn't matter now.” She sat down on the bench and patted the spot next to her “There's a few things I want to explain to you.”

Tom sat warily down next to her as she put an arm around him. “Tommy, I know you've been trying very hard but I don't think you're ready for your school yet.” anticipating a protest she put a finger to is mouth “Now just listen. Mrs. Taylor says you're still having trouble with your lessons and she thinks your friends are helping you with your quizzes.”

Tom looked down. She'd seen right through it all along.

“From now on” She continued “You can just stay at Kiddie Town until I come pick you up. They have lots of toys like your bear and the teachers there can you learn some of the same things.”

“You mean you're sending me to preschool?” Tom gasped.

“Tommy, be honest. Do you really think you can keep up with everything your third grade friends are doing?”

Tom thought about the days events and about how he always seemed to be just tagging along. “I guess not” he admitted.

“And there's one more thing” she said broaching a long unspoken subject “You haven't been having a lot of luck making it to the potty and I've noticed that you're getting up to go later and later.”

“But I can keep trying” He stammered

She shook her head. “Honey. Training pants are for children who just have accidents sometimes. They're really hard to change and their expensive. Now before I went to look for you at the arcade I went out to the store and when we get home I'm going to put you in a diaper.”

“A diaper?”He looked back down at his pants and his protest softened “Do you really think I need them?”

She hugged him “I'm afraid so honey. Are you going to be a good boy and come with me so we can get you out of those wet things?”

Tom looked down at his wet pants and thought of the trouble his disobedience had caused him. He sniffed and nodded “OK mommy, I'll be good.”

She smiled at him warmly and gave him a big hug. “Let's go home.”

After a short drive home Karen walked through the front door with a paper bag full of diapering supplies in her hand and her son following closely behind. “Come on” she said as she led him upstairs. She sat the bag down on his bed and went straight to his dresser to retrieve some dry clothes. “Now just sit down and I'll take care of everything.”

Tom sat on his bed and felt his sodden Pull-Up squish wetly beneath him. He just wanted out of it. His mother sat the clothes down next to him and got a pale green package of diapers from the bag. She opened it and light babyish aroma wafted though the air. She pulled out a single diaper and sat in on top of his dry things. Tom studied the baby animals designs playing across its front, he never thought his Pull-Ups would seem so grown up. A bottle of baby powder was placed next to it.

She undid his suspenders, lifted his shirt over his head, and instructed him lie back. She slid off his shorts and tossed everything in the hamper. Finally she removed his Pull-Up and disposed of it with a thud in the bin.

She took a few wipes and made very sure he was all clean before cracking open the bottle of baby powder. Tom just watched, he was amazed at how much quicker and efficient the process seemed now that his mom was handling it all. She spread a thin layer of baby powder all over him and at last picked up and unfolded the diaper. “Just lift up a bit baby.” She slid it under his bottom, made a few quick adjustments, and taped it snugly into place.

She started grabbing his new clothes. “Now I don't expect you to try to get to the potty anymore, but if you know you're wet you should let me know right away.”

He nodded. At least in resigning himself to this he'd be relieved of a cumbersome and frustrating responsibility.

They both went down stairs and had dinner. Afterward they sat together on the couch and watched TV. He was home, he was safe, and he things he could no longer look after himself were being tended to. It was hard to understand why he'd fallen into this role so easily. He could only wonder what lay ahead. As he pondered these thoughts the weariness of the day began to creep in and he fell asleep on the couch beside his loving mother.

Chapter 12

In the morning Tom was changed out of his soaked night-time diaper and helped him into his third grade uniform again. He'd be getting a new preschool one today his mother promised. His mother got him to Kiddie Town early and began the process of officially enrolling him in preschool, specifically the class they referred to as The Little Ducklings. The Little Bunnies class was reserved for children who'd been successfully potty trained. “You're both very lucky today” explained the secretary “We just had a new spot open up in Ducklings.”

While Tom waited for the adults to wrap up their business Johnny spotted him. “Hi Tommy” he chirped “Sorry about you getting lost like that. We just thought you'd be able to use the bus since you're kind of a big kid an all.”

“That's OK.” Tommy said “It was really my fault I guess. I should have just gone home.”

“Do you still wanna play with us? We've got some really fun ideas for recess today.” Johnny offered.

“I can't.” Tom looked down and heaved a sigh as he made an admission “I have to stay here instead of going to school with you guys.”

A look of realization crossed Johnny's face “Oh, so you're going to be in preschool now.” He paused “You might be a little less confused than you are in our class. They teach really simple stuff like algebra. And the teachers are really nice. And you won't have to keep going to the school nurse to get changed.”

Tom looked back up in shock “You know about that?”

Johnny shrugged “Sure, why else would you keep going to the nurse's office like that. Especially since you always did it after you asked to go to the bathroom.”

Tom stammered.

“It's OK” Johnny replied casually “Maybe we can play after school. That's when they let you preschoolers out to play with us big kids.”

“Uh sure. I guess.” Tom said still stunned.

“OK then, see you later” Johnny said as he bounced off to the big kid's room.

Tom turned back around just as the adults finished with their business. “This is Mrs. Hansley” his mother said motioning towards a young blonde woman “She'll show you around and help you get your new clothes on.”

“Hi” Tom offered as he tried to assess the new situation.

Mrs. Hansley knelt down “Hi Tommy, we have lots of fun things for you to do here. Just say bye to your mommy and I'll show you your new classroom.”

He exchanged a good-bye hug with his mother “Be a good boy” she patted his bottom “And don't worry about getting to the potty. Just let the ladies know when you need a change and we'll see about getting you back into big boy pants later. OK?” Inside Tom winced, he wondered if it was too late to protest this change in status. He'd felt so scared and vulnerable on that park bench that he would have agreed to nearly anything. He wanted to ask her to reconsider, but before the words came he was watching her walk out the door.

“Don't worry hon” Mrs. Hansley as she took his hand and led him through door that separated the preschool section from the the regular daycare “She'll be back to pick you up at the end of the day.”

Two doors where on opposite sides of the hallway. On the right was one decorated with a cartoon rabbit, and the left was a happy cartoon duckling. One small boy was being led from the duckling room to the other. “Good job getting potty trained Andy” Mrs. Hansley addressed him as they passed. Andy smiled back and followed his new teacher through the open door. On the other side of the Little Bunnies room Tom could see into a small bathroom. The door shut behind Andy and he turned to look into his new classroom, several changing tables lined the wall.

Tom's preschool teacher retrieved a pair of shortalls and a striped shirt from a nearby counter. On the bib of the shortalls was a picture of the same duckling that was on the classroom door, a comically large pin held its diaper in place as it smiled eagerly.

“Now let's get you ready for school and I'll show you all the fun things we have here and the other teachers.” She began untying his shoes and Tom took a moment to look around. He was surprised by how calm everything seemed to be. All the children were happily absorbed in toys or painting or being tended to by one of the other teachers. Something about it seemed welcoming. Once he was down to his diaper Mrs. Hansley casually slipped a finger just under the leg gather before moving to getting him into his shortalls. Tom looked around again, one group of children was watching a cartoon that seemed familiar. Once he was securely in his new preschool outfit Mrs. Hansley quickly took out a small pen-sized device and twisted it into the buttons on his shoulder straps and two other snaps on the front of his pants.

“What was that?” He inquired.

“Just a tool for grown-ups, don't worry about it.” She answered patting his head.

She showed him around the various parts of the classroom. There was an area with a toy box, one with a TV, some tables setup for painting, and a playground outback where the preschoolers could play as long one of the teachers was supervising. “You can do whatever you want for now” she explained “But everybody has to be quiet for storytime, and then lay down for a nap.” Two other teachers Ms. Kelly and Mrs. Peterson moved about the room observing things and occasionally shuffling one of their charges off to the changing tables.

With a pat on the bottom Tom was dismissed to find something to do until storytime. He looked back to the TV, something about the cartoon was familiar. He walked over to the group of children gathered around and watched for a moment. Then it dawned on him, these were the Cartonimals everybody had kept bringing up. They were currently involved in comical explanation of simplifying an algebraic expression. Tom recalled the subject from his old school. But this was different, somehow he was interested. Without giving it a second thought he sat down cross legged on brightly colored carpet Soon he was laughing along with his preschool classmates and swaying to the the simple songs.

He never noticed the dire urgency of his bladder until it was already giving way. In a moment he realized he was sitting in a wet diaper in the middle of a preschool watching a kid's show, but he couldn't pull himself away. Mrs. Peterson, an experienced preschool teacher, somehow suspected. As she walked by she quickly reached beneath Tom's shortalls. “Jessica” She said to Ms. Kelly “We have a wet little guy here. Would you mind?”

“Of course not” she replied.

Tom looked between them in shock.

Ms. Kelly knelt down beside him a put a hand on his shoulder. “Don't worry, I'll just put you in a dry diaper and you can go right back to watching your cartoon.” She took his hand and led him to a changing table.

“Do we really have to do this out here?” Tom said.

“Where else would I change your diaper silly?” She replied as as she set a disposable mat onto the table.

“It's just that the school nurse before changed... I mean helped me out of my pull-ups in her office.”

Ms Kelly smiled “Don't worry sweety, we have everything we need to change your diapers here too” She said motioning to a neatly stacked box of powder, wipes, and other supplies “Just let us grown-ups worry about stuff like that”

“No I mean” Tom stammered as she hoisted him up onto the table. He could see his protests would go nowhere. Nobody would see him as and different than an everyday preschooler.

She gently pushed him back onto the padded surface. Then she unfastened his shortalls and quickly went to work. “So you really must like the Cartoonimals, you've been watching them all day.”

“Yeah they're kind of interesting I guess” Tom replied.

“Do you want to try something else after we're done. Maybe try some of the toys?”

Tom shrugged “Sure.”

With a fresh layer of baby powder applied and a new diaper in place his pants were snapped back up and he was taken to the opposite corner of the room were toys of every description filled shelves and boxes. Ms. Kelly gave him a pat on the bottom and left him to play among the other preschoolers.

Tom settled down next to a small toy train set. He looked around for the engine and found a pile gears, wheels, and parts. He scooped them up in his hand, he could almost see how they were supposed to go together. He began playing with the pieces, trying different arrangements. Finally he worked out a configuration that seemed to work. He flipped a switch and all four wheels began to turn. A smile grew across his face. He sat his new train down on the track and he watched with open delight as it ran around the track. Soon another boy sat down next to him and picked the train up. “This makes it faster” he said before taking out a few gears and rearranging them. He put the train back and it took off faster than before. Tom realized that there must be many more combinations. He couldn't wait to try more. But before he could pick the train up again Mrs. Peterson was calling everybody for story time.

Tom reluctantly left his train behind and sat down on the edge of the group gathered around Mrs. Peterson's chair. Today's story, she announced, was Spaceman Simon and the Three Laws of Motion. The title reminded him of something and as he listened to Mrs. Peterson's slow sing-song reading he remembered hearing about this once, something about the scientist who'd gotten hit by an apple. It never interested him, and he never understood it. But in the story of Spaceman Simon it was something he could understand. He leaned in closer to see the pictures and Mrs. Peterson turned the book around to show everyone. Mrs. Hansley began passing out sippy cups to all the children. Tom almost balked but decided to try it, it was warm and sweet. He drank some more while he sat and listened.

He finished his cup just as the story came to an end. The teachers began moving everybody into the nap room. Tom paused in the doorway and looked at the rows of cribs crisscrossing the room.

“Can't I sleep on a mat or something” Tom asked Mrs. Hansley as she walked by.

“Oh these are lot more comfy than some old mat” she said before getting an idea. She grabbed a stuffed rabbit from a nearby shelf “Here you can have this stuffed bunny if you're scared. And one of us teachers will always be in the room.” She smiled and handed him his stuffed rabbit before giving his diaper a quick check and hoisting him into a nearby crib.

“But I'm not scared, I just...”

“That's good” she said giving his head a quick pat “Just lie down and try to sleep.”

Tom sank down to the mattress, rabbit still in hand. Mrs. Hansley pulled his blanket over him. “Good boy” she said softly “after all that playing and starting a new school you need some rest.” She slid the crib's railing into place and moved on to other children. In a few moments the lights were dimmed and lullaby began to play over unseen speakers. Tom laid there and realized he was tired, very tired. The crib's mattress seemed perfect. His blanket was soft and warm. And the music, the lulaby was simple but so deeply soothing. He wondered why he'd wanted to take a nap anywhere else. He closed his eyes and fell alseep.

He awoke again to Mrs. Hansley standing over his crib. “Did you have a good nap?” She said not even waiting for an answer before she checked his diaper. “Let's get you over to the changing tables.”

She helped him out of his crib and took him back to the main room where the other two teachers were busy changing the last of their student's naptime diapers. Tom could only wait before Mrs. Peterson finally came to tend to him.

Once he was in a dry diaper and back on his feet he scanned the room for something to do. His new favorite toy was already being played with. He sat down next to it anyway, just to observe. To his surprise his new new classmates, Mike and Sammy, welcomed him and he quickly joined them in building and playing with new trains. His new friends introduced him to other toys. There were toy robots, cars, and puzzles. Tom could hardly tear himself away from any of them. He barely noticed the hours slip by until he heard his mother's voice from across the room.

He looked up from his toy car and she waved him over to where she was talking with Mrs. Hansley. Still enthralled with all the new toys he'd found he rushed over to her “Hi mom, I was just playing with this cool car thing.” he quickly began enthusing “You can build the engine for it and everything. It's really cool.”

She looked at him with bemused surprise “Well I'm glad you had such a good time. Mrs. Hansley was just telling me what a great addition you are to the class.”

Tom looked down in embarrassment at his display of enthusiasm and tried to shift into a more mature bearing. “Yeah I guess it was alright.” But a peek back at his mother and teacher sharing a knowing look told him it was already too late.

Karen turned back to Mrs. Hansley “How did he do about letting you know when he needs a change?” The experienced preschool teacher dismissed the whole idea with a wave of her hand “We can work on that when starts getting ready to train. Until then we're happy to just let him play.”

“Oh, well I guess I won't worry then either.” Karen said as she gave her son's head a gentle stroke. “You said you had something for us to take home.”

“Yes” she retrieved a brightly colored book from her desk “This is a coloring book we give all our students. We don't really have lessons here but we do try to instill some of the basics. Tommy can go through this at his own pace, it has some puzzles and games that teach basic algebra, geometry, that sort of thing.”

“Thank you, seeing how he liked his day here I'm sure he'll have fun with this too.”

She looked back at Tom “Say 'thank you' to your teacher sweety.”

Tom accepted the book and took a moment to examine the picture of young children among giant algebraic equations. “Thank you, Mrs. Hansley” with more than a trace of genuineness. With that his mother took his hand bid his teacher good-bye and led him out the door. He looked back as the door shut and couldn't believe he wanted to go back.

Chapter 13

Tom sat cross-legged on the living room floor with his new coloring book sprawled out in front of him and a fresh red crayon in his hand. He puzzled over one of the first pages. “Help Farmer Jim put his Periodic Sheep in order of atomic weight” the text at the top cheerfully suggested.

The TV sat silent, he'd shut it off after seeing another ad for Ghost Invaders, his coloring book suddenly seemed more inviting. In the kitchen his mother was having a tense phone conversation. He began absentmindedly coloring the barn while he contemplated what he was to do with this puzzle.

Across the hall his mother's conversation came to a halt. She walked into the living room and sat down with a sigh. She looked over at her son and Tom froze assuming he was in some sort of trouble. But her wearied face turned to a smile. “Already starting your coloring book huh?”

“Yeah, I was just bored is all. I'm trying to figure this one out.”

“Well come over here, maybe I can help.”

Tom gathered up his coloring book and took a seat on the couch. His mother smiled again. “Not there silly” she said as she lifted him onto her lap. She chuckled at his evident surprise. “It'll be easier to help you here” she said brushing his hair lightly before putting her arms around him and taking the book in her hands.

Tom settled into his new seat, relieved he wasn't the cause of his mother's distress and pleased he seemed able to relieve it somehow. She examined the troublesome page for a moment. “I bet there's a periodic table somewhere in here.”

“Isn't that the chemical thing?” Tom asked “I haven't learned that yet.”

“Well that's what this is for” she said thumbing quickly through the book “to help you learn new things.” She came found what she looking for and pointed out one of the numbers. “This chart shows all the elements and their atomic weights” she explained patiently “Each one of the sheep has letters on it that tell you what element it is. Like this H means that one's hydrogen. You just have to look them all up and see which one has the largest atomic weight and put a one next to it, and then do the others in order.”

Tom nodded partly understanding “I get it. But what does all that mean”

“I'll explain while you work on the sheep” she said and reached over to retrieve a box of crayons from the coffee table.

They worked their way through a few more pages. Tom hung on his mother's words and when she praised him exuberantly for every right answer he felt like he'd won a Nobel prize.

“Thanks mom, that really helped a lot” Tom said as he shut the book and began to get up.

“Thank you for making me feel better” she said pulling him back into a hug.

“What was that phone call about?”

“Nothing you need to worry about.” She noticed a sogginess as his weight shifted “We should go out to eat tonight. But first I think you need a change.”

She let him down and he began to leave. “Just stay right here” she said as she retrieved a diaper-pin patterned mat from nearby. “I don't see any reason to go upstairs every time you need a change.”

She laid it out and began gathering all the necessary diapering supplies into a neat row while Tom resignedly laid himself down in front of her. He wondered how much his own behavior was contributing to this casual attitude about his diapers. Did he really seem like that much of a baby?

She worked swiftly and his shortalls were being fastened over a fresh dry diaper before he could complete these thoughts. Together they walked out to the car and started their way to a nearby restaurant.

Venturing out into the world beyond home and the colorful walls of Kiddie Town made him more acutely aware of his uniform. The night-time air was cool on his legs, he grateful his diaper was warm and dry. He knew by now that to everybody else his age was defined by the clothes he wore so he was prepared for the hostess's broad smile and careful tone as she welcomed he and his mother. Her question surprised him though “Will he need a highchair tonight?” she asked.

“No” Tom answered emphatically for himself.

Still she looked to his mother for confirmation.

“No thank you.” She said lightly.

They were shown to their table and Tom was left with a children's menu a complimentary sippy cup of juice.

Karen smiled at the special treatment her adorably shortall-clad son was getting. “I hope things like that don't bother you too much.”

“It's OK. I'm sort of getting used to it.”

“That's good to hear. I think I'm getting used to it too. Getting to hold you in my lap again really helped after a long day.”

Tom's cheeks burned slightly “I had fun too I guess”

“Good, I really hope you enjoy this time as much as I do.”

Tom looked at her with a bit of surprise “You mean you don't mind having to... do all that extra stuff.”

She shook her head emphatically “My biggest job is take care of you when you're too little to do it yourself and I enjoy doing it.”

“But I'm not really...”

“Honey, some day you'll be ready to go back to school, but for now I really hope you can accept this and enjoy being my little guy.”

Tom blushed redder but he felt good knowing his mother saw things that way.

Karen noticed a small smile growing on her son's face “After all you had fun at preschool today didn't you?”

Tom squirmed a bit “Yeah, it was fun I suppose.”

“Well keep having fun and maybe it will all get easier.”

They continued chatting over dinner. As Karen left her money on the table on got up to leave she quickly checked Tom's diaper.

“You're fine for the ride home” she said and then she thought for a moment “You know I saw a toy store just across the street. If it's still open we could go in and get you something. Maybe that car you were playing with today.”

Tom was deeply tempted but he couldn't quite go that far “No thanks mom.”

But his mother could see the way his eyes had lit up “OK, but let me know if you want a new toy and we can go and pick something up.”

The next morning Tom was laying on a rug at preschool absorbed in a Speak-n-Say. He pulled the cord “Apoapsis is the highest point in an orbit” a happy voice chirped from within. He looked through rain washing over the classroom's windows to elementary school school kids trudging to their bus.

Inside the teachers were distributing a morning snack along with sippy cups of milk. Tom took his and surveyed the classroom while he enjoyed his treat. He noticed that Cartoonimals had already started playing so he wandered over to take a seat. Olly Otter was elaborating on square numbers to Gavin Giraffe, who though he was the tallest and implied to be the oldest of the group was most often the recipient of these lessons. Tom settled in and finished his snack.

As the show drew to a close he found himself in the mood to try something new. He walked over to the art section and took a seat. Where he expected to find simple ordinary finger paints or maybe some crayons or brushes there was instead a thumb sized pen with several buttons and dials on its surface. He picked it up and examined it. Around him the other children where using them with unconscious ease. Tom shrugged and decided to figure it out on his own. He pressed the largest button, nothing seemed to happen. He turned a dial, still nothing. Finally he tried the next largest button, the pen vibrated for a moment before firing a giant stream of green ink across the front of his shortalls.

Ms. Kelly was soon by his side. She took the pen from his hand and surveyed the damage.

“Oh sweety, you should have asked one of us for an apron before you started. We're going to have to clean you up.”

Tom could only look at himself in horror. We wondered if there was something even lower down the chain than preschool in store for him.

Ms. Kelly saw his reaction and patted his head “Don't worry. You're not in trouble it's just a little mistake.”

She led him over to the changing tables and undid his shoulder straps and lowered his shortalls to the floor. She then removed shirt leaving him standing in nothing but a diaper. “Oh dear” she said “It looks like it soaked through.”

Tom looked down at himself. If his cartoon-animal print diaper didn't make him look like a toddler then the messy smear of paint across his chest certainly completed a certain picture.

Ms. Kelly sighed and turned to consult with Mrs Peterson for a moment. “I think I'll have to give this guy a bath. Can you cover for me for a few minutes.”

Mrs. Peterson nodded and Ms Kelly thanked her while she gathered Tom's clothes and took his hand. She led him to the other side of the classroom and through a door to a small tiled room. Here a bathroom for the teachers was apportioned with a tub, apparently for situations such as these. For a moment Tom was relieved to be in relative privacy but as Ms. Kelly began to draw a bath he realized what she had in mind.

“I can do this myself” he protested “I always do it at home.”

“I'm sure you can do lots of big boy things” Ms. Kelly said patiently as she reached for his diaper “But this is hard to get off, just let me do it and you can go back to playing.”

Tom dodged her hand with a step back “Just let me try.”

Ms. Kelly adopted a sterner tone “Does somebody need corner time? I'm sure your mommy wouldn't be happy to hear about how cranky you're being.”

Tom froze. He thought about how happy his mother had seemed with him the previous night. Somehow the threat of punishment didn't seem as bad as disappointing her. “OK” he said reluctantly.

He was quickly relinquished of his diaper and helped into the warm soapy water. He was immediately struck by strong pleasant aroma of the bath soap. Something about it was so soothing, so disarming. She began to scrub his thoroughly. Though he could barely discern it there really did seem to be a technique involved in removing this paint, he could only sit while her expert hands did the work.

“Boy you really splashed yourself. Hasn't your mommy taught you to use an ArtPen?”

Tom shook his head “No, I never even heard of it before.”

“I could show you how after you're all cleaned up, does that sound good?”

Tom nodded “Yeah, that sounds OK”

As he got out of the tub she wrapped him in a giant fluffy towel and began to dry him off. “There we go” she said as she inspected her work closely “all cleaned up.”

She hoisted him onto the a nearby changing table and got her newly clean charge into a fresh diaper. From somewhere beneath the table she produced a simple baby blue onesie “You can wear this while we wait for your clothes to get out of the washer.” She said as she pulled it over his head and snapped him into it.

“Oh, thanks” Tom said. At least he wouldn't be wandering around in nothing but a diaper.

They emerged back into the classroom just as everybody else was assembling for story time. Tom was surprised to find himself glad he hadn't missed it. The day's selection was Bubsy Beaver Meets the Colorful Chloroplasts. Tom couldn't help but be aware of being much more thinly dressed then everybody else. His onesie was snapped snuggly between his legs and made him more aware than ever of his diaper. But as Mrs. Hansley began reading he hung on every word.

After story time the children where again ushered into the nap room. While Tom was considering renewing his protests of the day before Ms. Kelly swept him into a crib and raised the side rail. “Don't worry your clothes will be ready when nap-time is over” she tried to reassure him.

Mrs. Hansley came by with familiar toy in her hand “Tommy here just gets a little anxious without his bunny. Don't you sweetheart?” she handed him the same stuffed bunny he'd slept with before. Tom again resigned himself to settle into his crib as the lights dimmed and a soothing lullaby played over unseen speakers. As he drifted into sleep he noticed a faint glowing from the corners of his crib. He barely had time to wonder what it might be before he was asleep.

Tom sat in his living room surrounded by a bevy of toys. He had his teddy bear and his stuffed bunny both close at hand as he fiddled with his toy car. His mother came in and stroked his hair while she sat down next to him. She joined in with him, helping him assemble a new engine for his car. It all seemed so normal and easy, he was happy to have his mother by his side. Then he was standing beside a crib in his own room while she helped him into his PJs. She kissed him on the forehead and offered him his stuffed animals before lowering the rail.

We awoke to Ms. Kelly standing over his crib with his freshly washed uniform in hand. “Come on sleepy head” she said “I'll get you back into your clothes and you can go play.”

Back at the changing table Tom was changed out of his soaked diaper and dressed in his uniform once again, cleaner and well powdered for the journey. “Do you still want to learn how to use an ArtPen” Ms. Kelly offered.

Tom shrugged “Sure.”

Ms. Kelly led Tom over to the art area and got him into an apron emblazoned with the same duckling logo that was on his shortalls. She handed him one of the strange devices and took one for herself before kneeling down beside him. She began to go over each button and dial in slow and patient detail. Soon he was drawing crude lines of his own, only getting a small amount on his apron.

Before long a picture was taking shape. The only thing he could really think of at the time and the only thing he could manage to draw with this unfamiliar technology. Two stick figures, representing his mother and himself, stood happily in front of a red house with smoke rising from the chimney. He knew it was childish but he was proud to have learned something new.

Ms. Kelly took a moment to praise her student. “Good job, I bet you're mommy will put this right on the refrigerator.” She carefully curled the paper into a tube and put it in a small cubby labeled “Tommy.”

Tom busied himself with the toy train for the remainder of the afternoon. Soon he heard his mother calling to him from across the room. She greeted him with a hug and pat on the rear “Mrs. Hansley says you have something you want to show me.”

“Yeah, I guess I sort of do” Tom said blushing slightly but excited to share his new talent with his mother. Mrs. Hansley handed him the sheet of paper and he opened it.

“Awww that's very sweet” She exclaimed causing Tom to blush brighter. She put a hand on his shoulder “It's very good Tommy, I'm really proud of you for learning new things.”

Tom thanked her and they hugged again. “You smell really nice too, that was good of Ms. Kelly to help clean you up” She commented. Tom blushed again and couldn't help but wonder if baths would be a part of his future as well.

They both said their farewells to Tom's teachers and left hand in hand. “I'm going to put this up on the refrigerator” She promised. Tom smiled bashfully. Not so long ago the idea would have been unbearably embarrassing. But he knew he'd made his mother happy, and for now that felt better than anything else.

Chapter 14

Tom awoke to the sound of his mother preparing breakfast below. He held his teddy against his chest nestled in the curve of his body. He'd gone to sleep with it beside him, but he always seemed to wake up this way. His sleep had been getting deeper since he'd started sleeping with it too, part of the learning benefits he assumed.

The door slowly opened and his mother peeked in. “Good morning sleepyhead” she smiled “I was starting to think you were going to sleep all day.”

“Good morning mom” he responded “I guess I was just kind of tired.”

She walked over to his bed and pulled back the covers “It's Saturday do you want to try getting out today?” She said as she casually pulled his pajama bottoms to his knees.

“Sure” Tom answered “What is there to do?”

“We'll talk about it about breakfast” She untaped his sodden diaper and dropped it in the pail. “You just keep on waking up wetter and wetter. I may need to get you some thicker diapers before you start leaking.”

Tom didn't even have time to respond to that embarrassing suggestion before she pulled his top over his head.

“Now do you want to take a shower yourself or do you want some help.”

“Mom, I can do it myself.”

She looked slightly disappointed “But you we're so nice and clean yesterday. You're sure you don't want a grown-up to do it.”

“Believe me. I'm sure”

“OK. But if I don't think you're doing a good job I might change my mind. I left some new soap in the shower I want you to use.” she stood up and tussled his hair as she left “Just hurry up. I'll have breakfast ready soon.”

Tom sighed and shuffled to the bathroom. He turned the shower knob and began one of the few personal tasks still left to him. He let the water run over him for a few moments before noticing what his mother was talking about. He picked up the plastic bottle and turned it over a few times. Inside were three chambers filled with clear, amber, and blue liquids each with a small button. They fed into another chamber which seemed to rotate, maybe for mixing Tom guessed. He experimented with it for a few moments without a satisfactory result. When he could get something out of the bottle it was either a small glob or a jet of watery liquid. He put it back down in disgust wondering why everything had be so hard. He picked up the tiny sliver of bar soap that was left, it was small but it would have to do.

Having heard him finish his shower his mother followed him to his room. “Just lie back and I'll get you ready for the day” she said as she pulled a diaper from the bag on his dresser. Tom did as he was told and watched as his mother collected his clothes.

She got him into his diaper and playfully poked his chest “I can tell you didn't use the right soap”

“I couldn't figure it out. Is the normal stuff good enough?”

She held out his pants “You'll need to start using it to prevent diaper rash.”

Tom compliantly stepped into them “But that's what the wipes and powder and stuff is for. Why do I need the soap too?”

“Because that's just not enough” She pulled his shirt down over his head and took a moment to adjust it “I'll give you some time to figure it out on your own OK?”

Tom sighed “Alright, I'll try”

“Good boy. Now let's eat breakfast.”

In the kitchen she sat a stack of pancakes on his plate and got a small sippy cup from the refrigerator. “Mom! I can drink from a normal cup.”

“This is what you drink at school. You're teacher says you like it, it comes from the store like this.”

Tom looked at the cup for a second and thought about the wonderful sweet tasting treat he enjoyed at preschool. But he shook his head. “No thanks, I'll just have some orange juice.” He watched as she set it back, halfway wishing he could just bring himself to ask for it.

She gave him a glass of orange juice and sat down at her own plate. “Have you thought of anything you'd like to do today?”

“Not really”

“Well I have some shopping to do but I heard there's a really nice amusement park here. Would you like to go that?”

Tom shrugged “Sure”

After they were finished Karen quickly cleared the table. She took a cloth and ran it under the sink briefly. “So store first and then park?” she said as she wiped a bit of syrup from Tom's mouth.

Tom tried to recoil from the sudden intrusion but it was over before he could react. “Yeah I guess” Tom answered while he watched her pick up a large blue bag and hoist it to her shoulder. “Mom, is that a...” He stammered.

“It's just so I can carry some of the things I need. It's a big purse really.”

Tom looked at the powder blue thing in horror “But it's got teddy bears and stuff on it. It's all... babyish.”

“It looks just fine. The important thing is that I can change you while we're out. Would you rather have to rush home every time you wet or just never go out?”

“No. But do you really need that?”

She nodded “I just want to take care of you the best I can. Just trust me. Remember what I said about you being my little guy?”

Tom looked down and blushed “Yeah I sort of remember that I guess.”

“Well I meant it. And that means I'm going to do the best for you even if you think it's a little embarrassing at first.” She looked him in the eye “So are you going to trust me on this one or do you just want to stay home all day.”

Tom looked up at her. Deep down he knew she had his best interests at heart “It's OK” he sighed “Let's go.”

They climbed into the car and a short drive later they pulled into a supermarket parking lot. Tom was sure he knew what this was about. And sure enough he was led to the baby aisle and told to wait by the cart. His mother quickly found a fresh package of diapers, larger than the one he had already nearly depleted. Tom watched as she piled extra wipes and powder into the cart as well. Then she turned her attention back to the packages of diapers. She paused at a row of items that promised “Extra night-time protection.” She looked at her son “Stars and moons or animals again.”

“Huh?” Tom replied, not fully understanding the question.

“Nevermind honey, I think I'll get these” she said tossing a package into the cart. Now Tom could see that this brand seemed to be decorated with the same baby animal motif as his current diaper, but this time they were portrayed sleeping on little cartoon clouds.

The clerk gave him a warm knowing smile as she rang up their purchase. “Somebody must be a heavy sleeper.” She said to his mother.

“He's almost soaked through every night. I just hope these don't leak.” She replied.

Tom looked at the ground. Even without his toddlerish school clothes she still immediately knew they were for him.

“Mine was the same way, but these always held up well” The clerk said.

“That's good the hear” Karen said as she collected her bagged groceries. “Have a nice weekend.”

Back at the car Tom's mother took the diaper bag from her shoulder and took a moment to stock it with new supplies. She quickly checked Tom's diaper “You're OK for now. Ready for the amusement park?”

Tom just nodded. He wasn't sure what to make of this public outing but at least it would be something different.

They drove across town and walked up to the ticket booth. Karen paused to retrieve the stroller from the trunk. She turned to her son as she unfolded it “This is just in case you get tired or if we run into any crowds. I don't want you getting lost again.” Tom just sighed and followed her to the ticket booth.

“One adult and one child” Karen informed the attendant.

Two tickets were slid beneath the glass “We have special programs today for kids at the planetarium” the attendant said glancing between the diaper bag slung over Karen's shoulder, the stroller, and the child standing quietly near his mother's side. “I suppose you'll be interested in the Little Astronauts Club. They'll have a puppet show at noon. Just after the big kids have their lab.”

“We just might look into that” Karen said as she ushered her son towards the gate.

Once inside Tom's eyes followed the twists of the roller-coaster before him to its intimidating summit. The ride had been visible from some distance, but here in its shadow it all seemed like far too much.

“I'm sorry Tommy. Looks like we'll have to find some other rides.”

He looked over to his side, a large sign with a red line about two inches above his head announced “You must be at least this tall to rise our roller coasters.”

“Oh, that's too bad” Tom said trying to sound disappointed as he looked back at the frightening mass of wood and steel before him. A group of elementary schoolers passed by on their way to the coaster, somehow taller and somehow unafraid. Not regretting the former for once he followed his mother as she pushed the stroller towards the other side of the park.

They passed under a large archway bearing the words “Tyke's Land” and into a broad courtyard surrounded by festively colored rides. Tom surveyed them cautiously, he could guess which one his mother would suggest.

“Would you like to go on Floppy Bunny's Forrest Romp” she offered, pointing towards tree decorated building into with various animal shaped cars disappeared at regular intervals.

“Sure” Tom said.

They checked the stroller at a small booth and climbed aboard a smiling frog. The ride's machanism clicked below them and they were pulled into a long corridor dressed up fairly convincingly like a forest. The voice of Floppy Bunny echoed from somewhere above inviting them to chase him to his den.

“Want to try and steer?” His mother asked

Tom took a non-committal hold of a steering wheel in front of him as the ride entered a much larger room.

Before them stood an image of Floppy Bunny. Tom peered at it quizzically unable to figure out if it was a projection, a hologram, or some other strange technology. The room shuddered and began to spin as the rabbit began diving behind trees. Tom began to realize that the room was something like a bumper car ride. He found a pedal and begin to move the car forward. The rabbit leaped wildly about and Tom began steering more and more eagerly in its direction. He bounced off a tree and laughed never noticing his mother's bemused grin as she watched him play.

Finally near the center of the room he caught up with his quarry. The mysterious animation disappeared and the lights came up. “Congratulations friends!” a voice echoed “You did a really good job catching me. Let's play again soon.”

A mechanism caught the car and began moving it to another passage and up a ramp. Tom beamed proudly at his mother. “That was fun.”

“I could see” she said mussing his hair “And you were pretty good at it too.”

Tom was too lost in his victory to even bother dodging her hand. The ride came to a halt in the same place they started. As they exited the ride he scanned the other offerings. “Mom, can we go do the maze.”

“Sure hon” she responded while the retrieved the stroller “Just wait up a bit.”

Tom waited impatiently until she walked up beside him. “Can we go now?”

“Not quite yet” his mother answered while casually gave his diaper a quick check “We'll go after I get you changed.”

“Oh yeah” Tom said suddenly remembering his diaper.

Without a word she took his hand and headed for a small nearby building marked with the blue and white figure of a diapered baby. Inside scenes of small children enjoying the park alongside cheerful cartoon characters adorned he walls. Several toddlers were already being attended to by their mothers. Tom was helped up onto a table where he laid back and joined them. She lowered his pants and reached into her well organized diaper bag. In just a few moments Tom was back in a dry diaper helped back down to his feet.

As they stepped back out into the park Tom quickly forgot about that embarrassing interlude and focused again on the maze. He eagerly made his way to the entrance and waited impatiently for his mother to catch up. She arrived and he quickly decided to take the path in front of him. He hurried through a few turns before arriving at an intersection with a sign post indicating the four cardinal directions. A small sign attached was emblazoned with a cartoon penguin trudging merrily through the snow; “Follow Peter penguin to his snowy home” it suggested on bold blue lettering. Tom pondered for a moment. He recalled something from one of the videos at preschool about penguins only living in the South Pole. Excitedly he urged his mother down the southern route. As he continued along this path he encountered more progressively difficult riddles and it each he dashed enthusiastically ahead but took care stay within her sight.

He reached the end of the maze and turned around to beam back at his mother as she pushed the up the last stretch.

“Good job” she said as she approached.

Tom looked down slightly once again realizing his childish enthusiasm. But he was genuinely proud of having figured out the last few bits without making any mistakes.

“Thanks” he said with a hint of bashfulness “It kind of helped that we learned some of that in school.”

She smiled and mussed his hair “I'm glad you're learning so much. She checked her watch “We should start getting home. Are you ready?”

Tom nodded and began to follow her towards the exit. Karen paused for a moment and looked back at her son. With no fun left to have Tom was beginning to feel tired from all his running around. “Do you want to sit in your stroller honey?” she offered sweetly.

Tom shook his head “No thank you.”

“You mean I had to follow you around with this thing for nothing?” she teased.

Tom looked at his mother and smiled. He could see she just wanted to let him rest, and he did feel tired. He sat down in the stroller and settled himself in. In a moment he was being pushed along the park's twisting walkways. Sometime before they reach the parking lot he dozed off.

He came to as his mother was opening the passenger side door. She helped out of his stroller and fastened his seat belt for him as he watched her groggily. She paused for a moment examining his seat belt and seeming to contemplate something. “Just go ahead and sleep sleep sweety” she said kissing his forehead.

“I guess I'm just getting used to naps” Tom responded settling deep his seat and closing his eyes. He heard his mother quickly putting his stroller and diaper bag into the trunk. With fresh memories of the day he'd spent with her drifting pleasantly through his head he drifted back to sleep.

 

 

Chapter 15

It was late after-noon on Sunday. Tom sprawled out lazily on the floor with his coloring book in front of him and his teddy bear by his side. The ignored television had drifted from a cheerful cartoon that had held his attention to some baffling show about elementary school kids solving neighborhood mysteries with quantum physics.

He wished he'd accepted his mother's offer of a visit to the toy store. There wasn't much for a preschooler to do. He looked up at her sitting on the couch engrossed in a magazine.

“Mom, can I get something from the toy store?” he asked.

She looked back at him sympathetically “Starting to get a little bored without any toys honey?”

“Yeah, I guess we should have gone before. I was just sort of embarrassed.”

“I understand” she said setting down her magazine and putting out her arms “You want to come over here and just talk?”

Tom waked over to her and allowed himself to be taken up in her lap. “Can't we go now?”

She shook her head “Sorry sweety, I don't think we have time. But if you're good for the sitter I'll let you pick out two things OK?” She said cheerfully.

Tom groaned “Do I really need a babysitter?”

“We already talked about why you need one” she said patting his bottom.

“But she's a teenager. She's only like three grades higher than I'm supposed to be” Tom pleaded.

“That doesn't matter” she said in a pleasant but firm tone “Besides everybody says the she's best in the neighborhood. And she always brings toys, so maybe you two will have something to do.”

“But...”

She grabbed him gently by the chin and looked him in the eye “Just promise me you'll be good so I don't have to worry.”

Tom sighed “OK.”

She smiled and gave him a big kiss on the cheek “That's my good boy.”

“I guess it might not be too bad” Tom mused for a moment before being distracted by the opening notes of the Cartoonimals theme. He quickly turned his attention to the television.

“Is this the show Mrs. Hansley says you like so much?”

Tom nodded excitedly “Yeah, it's really good.”

Karen put her arms around her son and let him settle further into her lap. “Would you like to watch it with me?”

Tom couldn't help the smile creeping across his face. “Sure.” He settled his head on her shoulder.

“That's Gavin Giraffe” he said pointing out the character “He's my favorite.”

“I thought he might be” She said smiling. The doorbell rang. “That must be Kirsten.” She sat Tom down on his feet and went to the door.

Tom hesitated for a moment. How could he possibly greet this girl who should at least be something close to a peer. He stepped cautiously into the entryway and peered around his mother to girl with energetic eyes who stood in their doorway.

“Thank you for coming on such short notice. You're a real life saver” His mother said.

“No problem Mrs. Welton” Kirsten said with buoyant confidence. She caught sight of the boy peeking warily from around his mother “And this must be Tommy.”

Karen stepped aside and urged Tom over “Tommy this is Kirsten your new babysitter.”

“Hi” Tom offered tentatively.

Kirsten knelt far enough to be face to face “Hi Tommy. I'm sure we're going to get along great.”

“He's already promised to be a good boy” Karen said getting her purse “Didn't you?”

Tom nodded slowly “Yeah.”

Karen turned to Kirsten “Diapers and things are in the basket next to the couch” she said pointing in the direction of the living room “And there's some more in his room. And don't forget to get him in his nighttime diapers when you put him to bed, he tends to get really wet at night. And my phone number...”

Kirsten whipped her phone out of her purse “Already got it. Along with your work, and the neighbors across the street.”

Karen smiled and shook her head “It's good to have someone so responsible to rely on. Dinner is in the fridge, I guess I won't need to tell you how to get it ready.”

“I have it all taken care of Mrs. Welton. No need to worry about a thing.”

“Thank you Kirsten” She gave Tom a hug and a kiss on his forehead “Bye-bye sweety. I'll get home after your bedtime so I'll see you in the morning.”

“Bye mom” Tom said politely still blushing from her instructions. He watched her as she waved and stepped out the door, closing it behind her.

Kirsten clapped her hands together “So should we get started playing a game or getting out some toys. I have some right here” She said indicating the colorful canvass bag slung over her shoulder”

“I think I just want to watch TV right now” Tom said turning toward the living room.

“Alright” she said following him “But you can't be shy all night.” She sat herself on the couch as her new charge stretched out in front of the TV “Oh, Cartoonimals! Cool!” She enthused. “Go ahead and watch your show, I'm just going to call a friend. Maybe you'll want to play when it's over?”

“Sure” Tom said flatly.

“Hey Amanda this is Kirsten” She said to the person at other end of the line “Yeah, I'm just babysitting tonight.”

Tom tried to ignore the intrusion.

“No” Kirsten said correcting her friend on something “New client tonight,. A little boy so I'm on diaper duty tonight.”

Tom tried harder to shut the the conversation out.

“I finished all my homework last night, so no problem there.” She continued “There's supposed a test in Mr. Peterson's class tomorrow but it's just on Calabi-Yau manifolds so I'm not too worried.”

The conversation drifted into gossip about people and events that may as well have taken place on the dark side of a distant planet as far as Tom was concerned. His world was one of cartoons and storytimes and all these things that he'd once expected to be part of now seemed distant and remote.

Soon after Tom's show came to an end Kirsten hung up the call slapped her hand to her knees “Are you ready to play something yet?”

“Sure” Tom relented. He could see this was going to be a boring evening otherwise.

Kirsten smiled “Good, I could see you were really interested in your show. You must really like the Cartoonimals.”

“Yeah I guess” Tom said “Sometimes I think...” He paused wondering if the thought he'd been turning over in his mind was too crazy to say aloud.

“Think what?” Kirsten asked.

“Sometimes I think it might be hypnotizing me or something.” Tom said in hopes of some outside confirmation “Like maybe that's why I need diapers and stuff.”

Kirsten tried to stifle a laugh as she sat down on the floor next to him “You're just a little boy Tommy. I watch the Cartoonimals all the time when I'm babysitting and I'm not hypnotized.”

Tom looked at the teenager sitting beside him so poised, collected, and mature. He could only conclude that she was right. Maybe there really was a difference between them.

She reached over and gave his hair a playful tussle “Don't worry kiddo, I'm sure your mommy will get you all nice and potty trained once you're ready.”

With that Tom became aware of a cold dampness between his legs. He looked down to avoid her eyes.

But she tell something was wrong. “Do you need a change now?” she asked.

“Maybe” Tom reluctantly admitted.

Without another word she pulled back the waistband of his pants and quickly checked his diaper. “Yep, you're soaked.” She quickly found the basket of diapering supplies and began laying out the changing mat. She patted the mat with one hand looking directly at him “Just lie down and I'll get you all ready, then you can pick out what game you want to play.”

Tom balked. Being changed by his mother was one thing, his teachers were something else. But being so dependent on this high school student made a certain point.

Kirsten put her hands to her hips “Remember how you promised your mommy you'd be good tonight?”

But it was a point that couldn't be denied. He looked at her eyes filled with patient authority and laid down in front of her.

“That's better” she cooed as she took a fresh diaper from the basket. Effortlessly she undid his button and slid his pants to his knees. She was a bit more generous with the baby powder than his other caretakers and the smell lingered strongly even as she taped his new diaper into place.

“There we go” she said fastening his pants “That wasn't so bad was it?”

Tom just shook his head. It was always a relief to be out of a cold sodden diaper. It was a comfort he had to rely on others for. And he knew this was someone he could trust as much as any young child would.

“I thought so” she said while she reached for a large bag “Now do you want to pick out a game or do you want to play my favorite?”

“You can choose I guess” Tom shrugged.

She began setting out a board with a path running through a cartoonish forest. Along the way where various sites like a blue trimmed house labeled “Grandma's Cottage” with smoke curling from a chimney or a beaver's dam bearing the name “Bucky's Den.”

“First you spin the spinner” she explained “Then you roll the dice and take a card. Each card has an equation written on it and you try to plug the numbers you got from the spinner and the dice into it so you can move the greatest number of spaces.”

Tom scratched his head as he turned over one of the cards and looked over it's elaborate series of numbers, letters, and parentheses. “This looks kind of hard.”

Kirsten looked in her bag “The other preschool games I have are Calliope's Chemistry Lab and Geometry Land.”

“This will be OK I guess” Tom said casting the card back into the pile.

Kirsten handed him a teddy bear shaped calculator with big bright buttons. “You can use this and I might you give you some hints if you really get stuck.”

Tom took the first turn and furrowed his brow as he looked between the numbers he'd gotten and the strange equation written on the card. He'd knew he'd seen this stuff, but he'd not yet mastered it. He pecked at the calculator for a while and moved his piece a few spaces before turning the dice over to Kirsten. She breezily worked out the problem and moved well ahead of Tom's piece, giving him a quick explanation of how she'd figured out the best way to solve the problem.

The rest of the game continued a similar fashion. Tom made a few mistakes which she quickly corrected and gave him some advice. Soon he was winning and while he suspected she was letting him win he found himself enjoying the special attention that was being paid to him. As he landed in the final square she gave him an enthusiastic round of applause.

“Good job” She said as she began to gather up the game.

“Thanks for helping me with some of the hard stuff. I think I kind of learned some stuff too” Tom said.

Kirsten smiled with a bit of pride “Well I do want to go into early childhood education” to she she quickly amended “That means teaching little kids like you stuff like basic algebra.” She glanced at her watch “Are you ready for dinner?”

“Sure”

“Alright, I'll go get it ready. You can look in my bag and see if there's any toys you want to play with.”

Tom reached into the bag as she walked off into the kitchen and pulled out a toy robot. He turned it over a few times and examined the panel of buttons across its chest. He pressed one and the robot sprang to life its mechanical arms and legs swinging through the air. He sat it down and watched as it walked a short distance before coming to a halt. He tried some more buttons and discovered that he could make it turn, walk backwards, or even reach for things. Finally he found a switch that allowed multiple buttons to be pushed before letting the robot go to perform them in sequence. He watched in wide eyed delight as it ran a simple rectangle he'd planned out. He began trying to work out how to get to pick up one of his crayons when Kirsten called from the kitchen.

“Tommy! Dinner's ready.” she called.

Tom reluctantly left his robot and walked into the kitchen. He found his place set with one of the sippy cups his mother had offered him the day before. He may have protested but he knew there was no chance of convincing her he was too big for such a thing, and in truth he'd come to crave the beverage inside.

They both sat down and started their meal.

“Is Mrs. Peterson one of your teachers?” She asked between bites.

“Yeah, she's nice. I like the way she reads stories.”

Kirsten nodded “She was a teacher there when I was in preschool. She's been teaching there forever so she's really really good at it. Mrs. Hansley must still be there too right?”

“Yeah. And Ms. Kelly too. She's really nice and she helped me learn how to use an art pen.”

Kirsten looked over the the refrigerator “I saw that drawing of you and your mommy over there, that's very sweet and you did a good job.”

Tom blushed a bit at the attention but he was genuinely proud of what he'd managed to do “Thanks”

After dinner Tom spent the rest of the evening happily engrossed with the toy robot while Kirsten sat and read one of her text books on the couch. Through trial and error he was able to create more and more complex routines. He'd just managed to run it in a circuit around the coffee table and behind the couch to pick up a crayon when Kirsten checked her watch.

“Five more minutes till bedtime big guy.” She said.

Tom groaned in disappointment.

“Don't be like that. You have bedtime story to look forward to, I always read to kids who've been good.”

Tom perked up slightly “You're going to say I was good?”

“As long as you don't give me any trouble about putting you to bed, sure.” She said before going back to her book.

Tom returned to the robot and began dreaming of his upcoming visit to the toy store.

A few minutes later Kirsten stood up from the couch. “OK sweety, it's time for bed.” she extended her hand and Tom took it without a second thought. She led him to his room and instructed him to lie down on his bed. She quickly found a neatly folded set of PJs topped with thick diaper and handwritten note reading “Tommy's nighttime things” on his dresser. She quickly removed his shirt and pants before untaping his diaper and disposing of it in the pail. She added a fresh layer of baby powder and slid the extra thick nighttime diaper beneath him “These have the cutest designs” she cooed as she taped it in place. Her voice had become soft and soothing like she was trying to coax him to sleep. After he'd stepped into his PJ bottoms she pulled back the covers and tucked him in.

She sat down at the side of the bed with a book. “Now this one of my favorites” she said “It's called Danny's Adventure's in Dreamland.”

As she began to read Tom realized that for once this had nothing to do with algebra or physics. It was just a kid's book, but he was transfixed. Fanciful illustrations spilled across every page as he heard the story of boy named Danny and his amazing adventures. As Kirsten closed the book and stood up he felt relaxed and cozy and ready for sleep. “Now don't worry about anything, your mommy will be home soon. Good night.”

“Good night” Tom responded drowsily as she turned off the light and closed the door behind her.

Sometime during the night he came half awake. He smelled his mother's perfume and felt a kiss on his forehead. He drifted happily back to sleep.

 

Chapter 16

“Good morning honey.”

Tom looked up at his mother smiling at him “Good morning mom.” He yawned and without even thinking rolled over on his back while she lifted his covers and began pulling down his PJ bottoms.

“Kirsten said you were a pleasure to babysit” she said while she undid his sodden nighttime diaper “So we can go the toy store on our way from from school if you want.”

Tom smiled and rubbed his eyes. His teddy bear was still nestled under one arm even as he was changed “I guess I thought she was a pretty good babysitter too.” He said.

She lifted his PJ top over his head “That's good to hear. Now go get in the shower and don't forget to try that soap.”

In the shower he looked over the strange bottle once more. He'd been shown more than once how it was meant to be operated but he just couldn't get it right. His morning shower was his last true refuge of maturity and afterward he'd walk right back into his mother's arms to be diapered and dressed for the day. He sighed and sat the bottle back down, he did the best he could with the bar of soap and finished up.

As he lied down on his bed his mother took a diaper from the bag and looked him over. “Still having a little trouble with that soap huh?”

“Do I really have to use it? I just can't figure it out.”

She slid the diaper underneath him and reached for the powder “Don't worry about it I'll just give you a little help tonight before bedtime” she said as she shook out some powder and taped his diaper in place.

“Can't I just take an extra shower or something?”

“It's just a little bath, it's no big deal” she paused and poked a finger to his chest taking a slightly sterner tone “Now don't give me any trouble or might have to rethink the toy store.”

Tom quieted himself and stood up to be helped into his clothes. “That's better” she said adjusting the straps of his shortalls “I bet going to bed feeling all nice and clean will make you forget all about it. Now let's go get some breakfast and get you to school.”

At preschool the sun shone brightly through the large windows, brightening the room's already cheerful hues. It was the first bit of sun in days and as Tom sat with his morning snack and watched cartoons his teachers were busy preparing the class for a trip to the playground. Ms. Kelly came by to give his diaper a quick check before declaring him ready to go out and moving on to the next student.

Once all the students in need of a change had been tended to everybody was ushered outside to a playground sat in the corner of the yard surrounding the entire daycare complex. Tom hung back for a moment while his classmates mobbed the swings and slides.

Tom found an empty swing and sat down. He let himself dangle while he watched the others, unable to bring himself to participate. Soon he felt a pair of hands at his back. He turned around to see a red headed boy smiling back at him. “I'll give you push” he said excitedly.

Tom nearly laughed. He wasn't quite a giant here, but he was certain that such a small child wouldn't be able to budge him at all. A moment later he was arcing through the air. Another sturdy shove as he neared the ground sent him to even higher. His shock at the strength of his classmate soon gave way to the simple joy of being on a swing. He'd forgotten what it was like to feel the wind in his hair and the the short weightless drift as he hit the top of his swing.

Finally he noticed something off on the other end of the playground and skidded to a stop. In his excitement he took off running. The merry-go-round had been a favorite of his and he wanted a chance to try this one out. He leaped onto it as slowed. He expected that one of the teachers might give it another shove but instead another boy hopped off and gave it a heave. Tom held tight as the merry-go-round lurched suddenly. One by one boys and girls hopped off to give the ride a forceful spin. Tom wondered if this was something else where he was barely keeping up with his new peers.

With a ring of a bell Mrs. Peterson called the class into a disorderly line in front of the door to the classroom. As they marched inside a quick diaper check sent each child either to the changing tables or directly to the nap room. Mrs. Hansley pulled Tom over to tables.

“Did you have fun outside” she asked as she sat him down.

“Yeah” Tom admitted as he lay back“The swings were pretty fun.”

“Looks like you got a little boo-boo” she said.

Tom looked the small scrape on his elbow “I guess I got that on the merry-go-round. I didn't even notice.”

“Don't worry” she said untaping his heavy diaper “the LumiGro will help that while you're taking your nap.”

“LumiGro?” Tom said in bafflement.

She fasten a fresh diaper to his hips “It doesn't just help you get big and strong, it helps your boo-boos too.” She smiled and handed him over to Ms. Kelly who led him to the nap room and helped him into his crib.

Tom gazed at the soft blue light emanating from the corners of his crib. Now he knew what it was. Now he knew why he'd been the runt of his elementary school classes and why even his classmates here were so surprisingly strong. It dawned on him that he might belong here more than he'd realized. The lights went down as the teachers left the room and the familiar lullaby began to play. He snuggled the stuffed bunny that had taken up home in his crib and fell softly asleep.

He awoke to the sound of his crib being unlatched and lowered. Mrs. Peterson hooked a finger into his diaper. “Wet again? We might have to start charging your mommy for extra diapers” she teased.

He was ushered back to the changing table and sent to play with the other children. He sat and contented himself with some toys while he eagerly awaited going with his mother to get his own. When he saw her come through the door he could barely contain himself from bounding over to greet her.

“Hi mom” he said cheerfully

“Hey baby” she chuckled “Looks like somebody's excited about going to the toy store.”

“Can go right away?” he asked

“I don't know” she teased “were you a good boy today?”

Mrs. Hansley laughed as she handed Karen the sign-out sheet “Tommy is a joy to have around. You should have seen him today in his crib with his stuffed bunny. Just adorable.”

Tom blushed bright red “It's just really comfortable in there”

His mother finished with the sign-out sheet and gave his hair a ruffle “Come on cuddle-bun, let's go get you some toys.”

“Moooom” Tom groaned “Cuddle-bun?”

“I'm sorry there tough guy” she said lightly tapping his chin with a playful fist “You still want to come with me for some toys?”

He nodded excitedly and without waiting for it to be offered or even giving it a thought reached for her hand and walked with her to the car.

As they walked into the toy store a bell attached to the door merrily announced their arrival. A kindly faced older man with a pair of bifocals perched on his nose looked up from the counter and smiled warmly at them. “Welcome to Children's Kingdom. Can you help you find something?”

“My son is here to pick out some toys”

Tom looked around him there was more to this place than toys. A large section to his left trailed off into a selection of more practical needs; furniture, clothes, and other sundry items.

“Preschool toys are right over here” the man said motioning towards a circle of colorful shelves.

Tom walked over and found himself surrounded by a colorful array of boxes and displays. Some toys he recognized from school, some were new. He looked over a few that had been taken out of their boxes and put on display while the adults talked behind him.

He picked out the same robot he'd played with the night before and a toy race car kit like the one a school. On his way back to his mother he passed a crib just like the one he took his naps in at school. He paused stared at it. For a moment he considered asking for it. It was always so comfy and he wanted to be able to keep up with the other kids.

He felt his mother's hand on his shoulder.

“Find something else you want?” She asked.

“No, just looking” Tom said pausing just a little too long to be believable.

“It's OK if you'd rather sleep in a crib. I was thinking of getting you one but I wasn't sure you'd like it.”

“Don't they have any regular beds with those light things” Tom asked the shopkeeper.

He shook his head “Sorry son. The effect stops working after a while, so none of the big kid beds have them.”

Tom looked back at is mother “OK, I like the one at school I guess.”

She smiled “I think that's a good idea honey.” She turned to the shopkeeper “When can you have one delivered?”

He quickly looked over a sheet of paper “Looks like we can fit you in tomorrow.”

“Great. Sign us up, and he'll take these two toys too.”

As they climbed back in the car Tom sat his new toys in his lap “Thanks mom.”

“You're welcome honey. We can make this a weekly treat for being a good boy if you want.”

Tom nodded excitedly “I'd like that. There's some other stuff I wanted too.”

“Good, I'd like to get some extra sheets for your crib, just in case your night diaper doesn't hold out.”

Tom blushed slightly “ Do you really think the crib is a good idea?”

Karen nodded emphatically “Yes I do. You're going to have to sleep in one for a while if you want to be a big kid.”

“I guess it will be alright for a while” Tom mused. As his mother pulled the car into traffic he wondered how long a while would be.

At home he waited patiently through a diaper change before finally getting to open his new toys. He pulled a bag of robot parts from one box and unfolded a large sheet of directions. After a few attempts he managed to get the most basic first stages done on his own but he found the rest of the instructions trailed off into far more difficult territory. “Ask a grown-up or other big person for help” the instructions cheerfully suggested.

“Mom?” Tom called hesitantly from his spot on the floor “Can you help me with this? Please.”

She looked up from some papers she was working on and smiled “I guess I can take a break.”

She sat down beside him and put an arm around his shoulder while she studied the directions. “This part goes with that part” she said pointing to some pieces laying on the carpet. She guided him through the rest of the process pausing several times to handle more complicated steps. Finally he snapped the final piece in place.

“Alright, good job” his mother said giving him a gentle pat on the back.

Tom happily turned his new robot over in his hands “You helped with most of the hard stuff” he thought for a moment and gave her a hug and a little kiss on the cheek “Thanks mom.”

“Awwww” she cooed as she hugged him tightly and returned his kiss “You're welcome sweet boy.”

She embraced him for a moment longer before giving him a pat on the bottom “I need to make dinner. Why don't you play with your new toys?”

Tom picked his robot back up and spent the rest of his evening keenly absorbed in is new toys. He paused for dinner chatting happily with his mother about his day before breezing out again to living room for more playtime.

After a while his mother tapped her watch. “It's getting close to your bedtime” she said with calm authority “Let's get you into the tub.”

Tom looked up at her with pleading eyes “Can't I just keep doing that myself. Please.”

“Once you learn to do it yourself you can, but I'm going to help you until then.”

“But...” Tom started.

“Don't you want to be a good boy like we talked about before?”

Tom quietly took her hand and she led him upstairs to the bathroom. She started the tap before turning to get him undressed. “There we go” she said as she unfastened his diaper “just sit down in the tub and I'll get you all nice clean. You'll feel a lot better, you'll see.”

Tom stepped into the tub and sat down. He watched as his mother took the bottle of soap that had given him so much trouble and deftly worked its mechanism to soap up the water. She squirted out some more on a washcloth and began washing him head to toe.

Tom wasn't sure if it was the nice warm water, the pleasant calming smell of the soap, or just his mother's loving care but he was slowly able to just relax.

She gave him a little tickle under his arm “I told you” she said and began to lather up his hair.

Tom just closed his eyes and felt the soap and water wash over him.

“There we go all nice and clean. Now just step out and I'll get you ready for bed”

As Tom got out of the tub she wrapped him in a big fluffy towel. He peeked out at his mother from it's generous folds as she dried him thoroughly “Thanks mom. That feels a lot better. Sorry I tried to argue with you.”

“You're welcome honey” she said as she finished up “And I know you're just trying to be big. You're still a very good boy. Now how about some PJs and a nice bedtime story?”

“Bedtime story?” Tom asked.

“Sure” his mother responded while she hung up his towel “Kirsten said you seemed to enjoy it. So unless you're just in a hurry to get to sleep...”

“OK” Tom said with a amused smile “I guess it was pretty nice.”

In his room Tom lay back on his bed while his mother gathered a fresh nighttime diaper and baby powder. As she began applying the powder he asked “What story are you going to read.”

She smiled “Something special I think your going to like.”

She slid the extra thick diaper beneath him and taped it snugly in place before helping him into his PJs. She tucked him in as he settled down in his bed with his teddy bear in his arms.

“I just saw something today while I was getting lunch and it made me think of you” she said taking a large thin book wit h sturdy pages titled The Story of Gavin Giraffe.

Tom blushed slightly “That book made you think of me?”

She sat on the side of his bed “You said he was your favorite and I thought we might give it a try.”

She open the book and began reading the story of how Gavin came to join the other characters and how, at first, he thought he was bigger than everybody else. Tom held his bear closer and found himself laughing at the voices his mother had chosen for the characters. In the end Gavin understood that he had a lot to learn from the others and they all became friends.

She closed the book and stood up giving her son a kiss on the forehead “Good night sweety” she said softly.

Tom sat up enough to give her a kiss on the cheek “Good night mom.”

She turned off the light on the way out and closed the door quietly behind her. Tom closed his eyes and thought about his mother finding that book and thinking about him. He knew he had play his part to make this strange situation work out as well as possible for both of them. And it seemed more and more every day that it might be an easy part to fit into. He hugged his teddy bear to his chest and drifted off to sleep.

 

Chapter 17

Tom fished out his last spoonful of cereal while his mother talked on the phone.

“Thank you” she said “If I'd known this was a school holiday I'd have planned ahead.”

She listened for a moment and laughed “I hope he's not much of a problem, he's usually very well behaved. I'll just need to get his diaper bag all packed and I'll drop him off.”

Tom tried to look interested in the remains of his orange juice while these arrangements were made.

Karen ended the call and sat at the table smiling. “That was Mrs. Burke, I think you know her son Johnny from when you were in Mrs. Taylor's class. She says she'll be able to watch you today.”

Tom looked back at her. “Yeah I remember him.” He recalled a time, not long ago, that he would have protested such an arrangement. Now it would seem ridiculous. He obviously needed some kind of supervision. “I think that will be alright.”

She smiled a smoothed his bangs “I think so too.”

They arrived at the Burke's doorstep, Tom's freshly packed diaper back slung over his mother's shoulder. Tom let his arm hang loosely from her grip on his hand and looked at the large welcome mat while she rang the doorbell.

Johnny's mother answered the door with an enthusiastic “Hey guys!”

“Hi Marie, nice to meet you” Karen said as she shifted the diaper bag to her hand “This is Tommy.”

“Hi Tommy” she said bending down to meet his face “Johnny is so excited to have you over today.”

“Hi” Tom replied sheepishly as his mother handed his diaper bag over to Mrs. Burke.

“This should be everything he needs, he only goes through a few diapers a day” She said “Thank you so much for taking him on such short notice.”

“It's no trouble at all” She said offering a hand to to Tommy “It'll be fun to have a little guy around the house again.”

At that Karen looked at Tom dressed in his preschool shortalls and smiled. She knelt down and gave him a hug “Be good for Mrs. Burke.”

Tom hugged back “I will.”

She let him go with a kiss on his forehead “Good bye sweety. I'll be back as soon as I can.”

“Bye mom” Tom said as he took Mrs Burke's hand.

Karen stepped towards the car as Mrs. Burke led him inside and closed the door “Wanna go see what Johnny's doing?”

She led him to Johnny's room and rapped lightly on the already open door. “Johnny I have a little visitor for you.”

Johnny looked up from a set of models he was working on “Hi Tommy!” He said enthusiastically “We're gonna have a lot of fun today I just know it.”

Tom smiled warily. It was good see his friend again, but the circumstances were so different now.

“You two have fun” She said cheerily “And let me know if you think you need anything” Tom noticed her nod in his direction and pointed look at Johnny.

“I will Mom” Johnny said she walked away.

Tom walked across the room to Johnny's desk. He glanced around at the various intricate looking models and shelves of inscrutable toys. “What are you doing?” he said in the most casual manner he could manage.

“I'm just making a model of the Battle of Hastings” Johnny said with a small measure of pride “Of course no one really knows how the English side was set up but I put the front line all the way to the river just 'cause it looks cooler.” He looked at Tom who only nodded slowly but eyed the soldiers with excitement. “This guy over here is William II of Normandy” Johnny said gearing down his explanation “And this is Harold II.”

“That looks really cool. But I don't know who those guys are.” Tom admitted.

“That's OK” Johnny said setting down one of the models “Let's find something we can both do.”

Johnny opened up his closet and began reaching into the back. “I haven't played with this for a while but it's lots of fun' He said as he as retrieved a box depicting several Kindergarten-aged kids playing with some sort of large crane. He sat the box down in the middle of the floor and opened it revealing a well-organized set of metal pieces and engine parts. “What do you want to make?”

Tom looked everything over “I don't know. It looks kind of complicated.”

Johnny smiled “It's OK I know what to do with the hard parts. How about a crane like the one on the box?”

“Sure” Tom shrugged as he sat down beside his friend.

Tom worked on the base while Johnny put together several motors as he tried to explain a few things about torque and armature. Tom just nodded and focused on linking his pieces together. Before long they came to the point where one of the motors was to be attached. Johnny handed him an unfinished motor and stepped him through adding some of the basic components. As his sketchy understanding grew he watched their creation become a working crane. He took the controls and, with a sense of accomplishment, began picking up and moving some toy cars Johnny had spread out.

“Neat huh?” Johnny said

“Yeah, this is cool” Tom replied.

“Hey guys, I've got some snacks for you!” Mrs. Burke shouted from downstairs.

Tom rushed down with Johnny and found two places set up in front of the TV. “I'm sorry Tommy” Mrs. Burke explained “I couldn't find any sippy cups but I found and old bottle. I know you're a little big for that but I hope it's OK.”

Tom looked for a moment at the small plate of fresh cookies and the pale blue baby bottle beside it. “Oh” Tom said trying to register as little embarrassment with her well intentioned hospitality as possible “That's OK.”

He sat cross legged on the floor while she turned the TV to some cartoon he hadn't seen before. Tentatively he tilted the bottle back and brought it to his lips. The liquid inside was delicious, like what he drank from his sippy cup at preschool but better. He began drinking in earnest until he felt his diaper being checked.

“You're good for now” Mrs. Burke said patting his head “But not for long if you keep drinking like that.”

Johnny came back from a quick trip to the bathroom and settled in beside Tom. “Oh I used to watch this show all the time” He said..

“What is it?”

“The Triangle Trio” Johnny said taking his glass of milk “its about basic trigonometry.”

Tom as cross legged and drank slowly from his bottle as he watched with growing interest. When he found himself laughing alone he looked over and saw Johnny wasn't paying attention.

“We could try watching something you like” Tom offered to his friend.

“This is OK” Johnny said batting away the suggestion “There's really just preschool stuff on right now anyway.”

The closing theme of the show prompted Mrs. Burke's return to the room.

She placed her hand on her knees and looked down happily at Tom “Now that we've had a snack I think it might be time for a nap” she knelt down next to him and checked his diaper “And some new pants too. Come on, we'll just let Johnny have some big kid time.”

She took him by the hand and led him upstairs to a small guest room where a large comfy looking bed had been outfitted with a fold-out railing and a collection of stuffed animals. Tom's diaper bag had been been set on the dresser and she quickly retrieved his changing mat and fresh diaper from it. She laid the changing mat across the foot of the bed and turned to get more supplies.

Tom knew exactly what was expected of him and he laid back on the mat without protest or complaint.

“OK sweetheart just lie down and..” she said before she turned around and saw him lying there. “Such a good boy” she smiled. She quickly undid his shortalls and began removing his sodden diaper “Getting all this stuff out of storage made me think about how much I miss having a little guy to take care of around here” she said wistfully “Johnny's gotten so big he hardly needs me any more.” She got him cleaned, powder and into a dry diaper before pulling back the covers and allowing him to climb in. “Now just try to take a little nap” she said tucking him in “and we can go to the park after you get up.” She left him with another bottle, pressed a button on a small blue cube on the night stand, and quietly closed the door behind her.

Tom held his bottle and looked curiously at the cube as a soft lullabye began to drift faintly from somewhere inside. He could still hear the sounds of Johnny downstairs watching some program for big kids and as the gentle music filled the room and sleep overcame him he wondered when he'd be big again.

Mrs. Burke roused him by shaking his shoulder and he found his bottle pressed to his lips and half empty. In his other hand a plain brown stuffed bear was clutched loosely to his chest. “Looks like you made yourself nice and comfy” his babysitter observed. With scarcely another word he was changed out of his nap time diaper and brought down stairs where Johnny was already ready for a trip to the neighborhood park.

Mrs. Burke, diaper bag slung over one shoulder, held Tom's hand all through the several blocks to the park while Johnny walked briskly ahead excitedly detailing all the things they could do at there. When they arrived she knelt down and place a hand on Tom's shoulder. “Just let me know if any of these big kid rides get too scary” she said indicating another smaller play ground at the bottom of the hill “There's another playground for preschool kids over there if you'd like.”

Tom looked up at the odd playground equipment towering over his head. A set of swings seemed to have some sort of elaborate mechanical contraption at it's top. While down at the bottom of the hill was small arrangement of cheery looking plastic rides much like the ones he'd seen anywhere else.

He watched as Johnny dashed off for the big kid equipment and considered his options. “I think this will be fine” he said.

“OK hon, I”ll just be right over there on the bench.” She gave him a pat on the bottom.

He joined Johnny at the swing set.

“Sit down Tommy” Johnny said “This is one of my favorites.”

Tom sat himself in one of the swings and watched as Johnny flipped two switches and rushed over to the neighboring swing. “Don't forget to hold on” Johnny cautioned as he sat down.

From above Tom heard whirring sound and his swing began to sway back and forth. “Oh neat” Tom said “It's all automatic” a hard metal clink sounded and the swing thrust them both higher. Tom tightened his grip but smiled “I like this one” he said happily.

“It gets a lot better than this” Johnny replied with a grin.

Another clank and the swings flew still higher. Now Tom was being lifted out of of seat. He held tighter and watched the ground fly away from beneath him. He took a breath and told himself to hold it together. A whirring sound came from above and Tom wrapped his hands desperately around the chain as the swing began to spin. It spun faster and faster as he heard Johnny laughing with delight beside him. Finally he let out a small yelp. Somewhere in the whirl spinning around him he saw Mrs. Burke reach out for the switch. Slowly everything wound down until he could take a dizzy step off the swing.

Mrs. Burke knelt down and placed steadying hands gently on his shoulders “Are you OK sweety?”

“Yeah I'm fine” Tom said with evident embarrassment as he leaned against his caretaker for support.

“Sorry Tommy” Johnny said “I thought you'd have fun.”

“That's OK” Tom replied. As the world started to settle around him he became aware his diaper being checked.

“Oh dear, you are absolutely soaked” Mrs. Burke rose to her feet and took his hand “Let's go get you changed and then maybe we can try out the other playground. Johnny might want some more big kid time.”

As Tom was led down toward the diaper changing room he looked back at Johnny happily jumping back on the swing. Once inside he was hoisted onto the the nearest changing table. “I'm sorry about all that” she said as she retrieved supplies from the diaper bag and began undoing Tom's shortalls “The other playground looks like a lot more fun don't you think?”

Tom nodded “It looks more like the one at my school. That one doesn't have spinning swings or anything like that.”

Mrs. Burke slid a fresh diaper under his bottom and taped it into place “I think so too. Let's go give it a try.” She set him on his feet, took his hand, and led him out to the playground.

She paused for a moment to assess its offerings. “Would you like to start with the sandbox?”

“Sure” Tom said unenthusiastically, disinterested in the sandbox itself but eager to avoid being hurtled around by another automatic swing set. He sat at the edge of the sandbox and absentmindedly ran the sand through his fingers.

He paused and looked at the sand curiously, something about it felt different. He took a small handful and squeezed it his hand. Surprised to find that it held its shape he knelt down in the sand to see what else it could do. He quickly learned that could easily mold it into almost any shape he wanted or break it apart again by rubbing it between his fingers. Without any thought to appearances he lost himself in constructing a grand sand castle with grand archways and towering parapets. His inexperience showed in the rough uneven walls and sometimes his structures collapsed but he carried on playing taking earnest pride in his childish looking structure.

He was putting on some finishing touches when he heard footsteps behind him. He looked up to see his mother smiling at him. “Hey sweety, that's a great castle.”

Tom stood up as she knelt down to hug him “Thanks” he said returning the hug “The sandboxes here are really fun.”

“I can see you were enjoying yourself” she teased as she brushed sand from the seat of his shortalls. “You're covered in it. You'll definitely need a bath tonight.” She looked over to Mrs. Burke “Hi Marie, I hope he wasn't to much trouble.”

Mrs. Burke gave Tom's cheek a pinch “He was a joy to watch.” she handed over his diaper bag “I'd be happy to look after him again if you need it.”

Johnny bounded down the hill “Bye Tommy. I hope your mom let's you come over to play again soon. Maybe you'll even be ready for the big kid swings.”

Tom glanced at the menacing swings at the top of the hill “Yeah maybe”

“I think Tommy might prefer the sandbox for a little while” Mrs. Burke said.

“Well thanks again.” Tom's mother said as she took his hand “Hope we'll see each other again soon. Bye guys”

Tom looked contemplatively at the sandbox wondering how much longer he'd be playing in playgrounds like this one. He felt his mother give his hand a squeeze and looked to see her nod in the direction of Mrs. Burke and Johnny. “Oh yeah.” he quickly remembered himself “Bye Mrs. Burke. Bye Tommy.”

Karen turned and began walking her son back home. “Just so you know, I stopped by the house earlier so they could deliver your new crib.”

“Can't I sleep in my bed one more night?” Tom asked fearing he already knew the answer.

His mother shook her head “Sorry sweety, they took it down to make room. You'll like it once you get used to it.”

“I guess I can try.” Tom said sounding somewhat deflated.

“That's my good boy” she replied mussing his hair slightly “Now let's go home and get some dinner.”

 

Chapter 18

Tom stood in the his room looking over his new furniture. In the middle of the room was a large cherry-wood sleigh style crib neatly fitted with baby blue sheets patterned with nursery rhyme characters. His teddy bear was dutifully stationed in one corner. Beside the crib was a large rocking chair.

To replace the convenient changing area his bed had offered, a changing table now stood against the far wall. “What do think?” his mother asked as she stocked it with diapers.

“Do I really need to sleep in it with the rails up and everything?”

“You do at school don't you?”

“Yeah. But that's just for a little while. I mean those light things still work even when the rail is down right?” Tom pointed out hopefully.

“Yes they do.” She replied as she stood up and approached her son “But your much safer with them up. It's a really big drop if you fall out.”

“But I won't” he looked pleadingly into his mother's skeptical eyes. She began to shake her head and he took a new tact “What if I need you for something?”

She knelt down and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder “Aww sweety, would you like it if I checked on you during the night.”

He looked down. As much as he wanted to tell himself this was all just a gambit it was just as much of an admission. “I just what to be able to go to your room if something bad happens.”

She lifted his chin and looked him in the eye. “You really are worried aren't you?”

She relented “Well I suppose it's better than having you try to climb out.” She smiled “But I'm still going to start checking on you.” She pressed a finger playfully to his nose “And if I find you've rolled out you're getting locked up nice and tight.” She punctuated her teasing with a quick hug and light swat on his bottom. “Now how about some play time before dinner?”

That night Tom sat in a tub filled with warm soapy water while his mother gave him his bedtime bath. She hummed softly as she scrubbed him. “Close your eyes so you don't get any soap in them honey.”

He shut his eyes and listened closely to the tune as she lathered his hair, somehow it seemed familiar though he couldn't place it.

“That sand just got everywhere” she observed as rinsed the soap from his head.

“Sorry, I guess I didn't notice.” Tom said opening his eyes again.

“Don't apologize” she said holding up a large fluffy towel “That's what I'm here for.”

She wrapped him in the towel as he stepped out of the tub, dried him thoroughly, and led him back to his room. She let the towel fall to the ground as she lifted him onto his new changing table.

She softly hummed the tune again as she powdered and prepared him for his nightime diaper. Tom searched his mind for anywhere he could have heard it. His extra thick diaper was fastened snuggly around him before he could find the memory.

“There's something extra that came with your crib” his mother said retrieving something from the changing table.

Tom watched as she held up a footed sleeper printed with little cartoon race cars. “They had a few to choose from” she smiled “and since you like playing with your toy car I picked this one. Would you like to try it on?” She looked at him hopefully.

Tom blushed slightly at being the object of his mother's maternal thoughtfulness again. But deep inside it felt right. He smiled and nodded “Good choice mom.”

She set him on the ground and helped him into his new PJs. “What do you think?” she said as she zipped up the back.

Tom took a moment to feel the padding beneath his feet and soft warm fabric swaddling his body. “It's really comfortable.”

“I knew you'd like it” she took a book from the dresser and sat in the rocking chair “How about a bedtime story?” holding her arms out invitingly.

Tom smiled and climbed into her lap. It took him a moment to fit himself in comfortably but he found a cozy spot with his head resting on her shoulder and a view the pictures depicting Mortimer Mouse's Moon Mystery.

“Mortimer Mouse was getting ready for his trip to the moon” she began as she gently rocked. “Somebody was stealing cheese from the cheese mines and only the world famous detective could find out who.” As she turned each page she held up the pictures for him and Tom listened closely to every word.

As they reached the conclusion Mortimer was questioning a strange mouse the space patrol had found sneaking around the moon base.

“'I'm a professional moon explorer” she read in a squeaky voice “and I've come here to climb the tallest mountain on the moon: Mons Hadley.'”

“'This explorer a fraud and I can prove it.'” She read, giving Mortimer a slightly more distinguished voice “How did Mortimer know?”

“I know that one.” Tom smiled “The tallest mountain on the moon is Mons Huygens.”

“Let's see” she said as she turned to the last page and read “Mortimer knew that any moon explorer would know that Mons Huygens is tallest mountain on the moon.”

She closed the book and smiled at him “Did you learn that at school?”

Tom looked down bashfully “Yeah, they're got a Speak-n-Say that has a lot of stuff about astronomy on it.”

“That's what you should be doing sweety” she said as she hugged him close and continued rocking “Just play and learn and don't forget that I'll always be here.”

Tom just closed his eyes and let her rock him “I know mom.”

“Still want the side of your crib down?” She asked.

Tom nodded.

“Alright, I'll be in to check on you in a bit.” She said as she stood up and set him down.

“Thanks mom” Tom yawned.

She turned back the sheets and helped him into his crib.

“Good night sweety” she said with a kiss on his forehead.

“Good night” Tom replied closing his eyes.

Soon after she had clicked off the light and closed the door behind her Tom was fast asleep. Sometime during the night he was dimly aware being gently pushed from the edge of the crib being tucked back in.

The next morning Tom was sitting on the floor at preschool building a railroad with some of his classmates. He vaguely remembered some of what he'd learned from building the crane with Johnny while he pieced the engine together. Finally he set it down on the completed track and watched with pride as his train chugged steadily around curves and up hills.

He was absorbed he barely noticed when Ms. Kelly came by to check his diaper and round him up for story time. He found his place in front of Mrs. Peterson who sat patiently with a book in her lap while the children gathered around here. “Good morning everyone” she said sweetly once they were all assembled.

“Good morning Mrs. Peterson” Tom replied in unison with the rest of the class.

“Now before we start the story does anybody know what important day is coming up?” She asked.

“Founder's day” answered most of the class.

“That's right. And who knows what that means?”

“It's the day when they started the town.” answered one boy.

“That's right Josh” Mrs Peterson replied “And for Founder's Day all your mommies and daddies will come to class. So we're going to learn a new song we can all sing for them.”

As his classmates clamored excitedly around him a sense of dread sunk into the pit of Tom's stomach. He'd grown to except so many things in this new life but singing a preschool song in front of an audience was yet another step back. He sat and contemplated a way out while Mrs. Peterson read the morning's story.

After story time we was whisked away for a quick change into put down in his crib for naptime. He looked at the bars around him and thought of the one slim outpost of maturity he'd managed to maintain at home. He feared losing more it but as he took hold of his stuffed bunny and closed his eyes he thought about how the comforts of being a preschooler seemed so right.

Later that afternoon he exchanged hugs with his mother as she picked up him up from class. “Your teacher says you guys are going to put on a show for us.” She said excitedly “I can't wait to see what you guys are planning.”

Tom looked at her smile and abandoned any notion of getting out of it. He just couldn't disappoint her that way. “It's just going to be song.” He said.

“Well I'm sure you'll do a great job.” She said taking him by the hand and leading him to the car.

Later, before bed being put to bed, he was given his nightly bath and was a story as he cuddled in his mother's lap. During the night he woke up to his mother rolling him back from the edge of the crib. “Just go back to sleep” she whispered as she kissed him on the forehead and smoothed the sheets over him.

In the morning Tom ate breakfast while he watched her get ready for the day. “It's a good thing I've been checking on you” she said “You can try sleeping with the side down a little while longer but I may have to find another arrangement OK?”

Tom began to object but stopped short. He could see she was serious, and he knew she was right. “OK mom.” He answered.

“Good boy” she said “Now let's get you to school.”

As Tom sat in the car watching out the window he wondered what the other arrangement could possibly be.

 

 

And the first of the new chapters

Chapter 19

By late morning at preschool Tom had thoroughly engrossed himself in his favorite toys and he felt a twinge of disappointment as his teachers began herding the children together to begin practicing their Founder's Day song. He reluctantly trudged toward the piano where a smiling Mrs. Peterson greeted her students.

“OK children” she said clapping her hands together “Today we're going to learn a new song for all our mommies and daddies. Is everybody ready?”

Tom looked down at his feet and wished he was somewhere else while his classmates all voiced their enthusiastic ascent. Mrs. Peterson plucked out a few notes on they keyboard and began leading the class through the song. The other preschoolers followed along repeating the lines after her while Tom tried to stay unobtrusively in back, moving his lips but barely paying attention at all.

He felt a tug on the strap of his shortalls as Mrs. Hansley pulled him aside to check his diaper. “You don't need a change, why are you so cranky today?” She asked him quietly.

“I just don't want to do this song. Can't I do something else?”

“Don't be shy.” She said placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder “Think of how proud your mommy will be when she sees you singing.” She turned him back around and knelt beside him. “Just sing along with me.”

Tom, knowing he could no longer get away with faking it, finally paid attention to the words.

“Concordia parvae res crescunt.” Mrs. Peterson sang.

Tom gave Mrs. Hansley a puzzled look.

“It's Latin” she explained. “Some of the words are kind of big, just follow along and do your best.”

The phrase repeated several time and Tom tried his best to remember and pronounce the words.

“Crescat scientia vita excolatur” continued Mrs. Peterson.

Tom took a moment to wonder what the kids in higher grades were doing and be thankful this was all he had to face. He struggled on through the rest of the song taking some small comfort in the fact that his classmates had some difficulty as well. The class moved on to snack time and Tom pondered how he'd ever learn this song as he ate his milk and cookies.

By the time his mother was taking him home he had a plan, he'd fake sick the day of the performance. He wouldn't embarrass himself stumbling over some preschool song in front of an audience.

“So how did the rehearsal go?” She asked as she pulled out of the parking space.

“OK I guess he said” he looked over at his mother, the woman who bathed him and changed his diapers, and abandoned his guardedness “Some of the words are really hard. I don't know if I can even remember them.”

“You'll do great I'm sure, I'm just so proud of you.”

Tom watched out the window for a few moments before turning back to her “Are you really proud of me?”

She looked genuinely shocked at his question “Of course I do sweety. You're learning so much and adjusting to all this new stuff so well. I can't wait wait to see you show everybody else too.”

“Thanks mom” Tom thought for a moment “I'll do my best for you.”

She smiled at him at him and gave his hair a ruffle “I know you will.”

His thoughts of faking sick began to melt away. He could almost see himself singing his heart out alongside his fellow preschoolers and making his mother proud.

After dinner he sprawled himself out in front of some cartoons and played with his small but burgeoning collection of toys while his mother relaxed with a book. Even if she wasn't actively watching him, knowing she was close gave him a certain peace of mind.

She noticed him looking back at her. “Do you need a change?” she asked raising an eyebrow.

Tom shook his head “No, I don't think so.”

She smirked skeptically and sat down to give him a check.

“What do you know? All dry and clean. What were you glancing around for?”

Tom laughed at his mother's teasing and shrugged his shoulders “Nothing.”

She took one of the straps of his shortalls and rolled him onto his back. Grinning she placed a finger to his side.”Are you sure you don't want to tell me”

“Mooom” Tom half-groaned half-laughed.

She slid a hand under his shirt and reached under his arm giving him a light tickle. “I'm not really even ticklish anymore” Tom said even as he began to squirm a bit.

“Oh really?” She said as she tickled faster. “Then this won't do anything at all” She laughed as she twitched her finger across his skin.

Tom resisted momentarily before breaking into giggles and trying to roll away.

“You seem pretty ticklish to me.” She said grinning as she withdrew her attack.

“Maybe a little bit.” Tom said as he caught his breath.

She checked his diaper again “More than just a little” she laughed “It's probably time to get you ready for bed anyway.”

She got him out of his newly soaked diaper and into a nice warm tub.

“I got something for your room” she said as she started scrubbing his back.

“Really, what is it?”

“You know how you were worried about putting the sides of your crib up?”

“Yeah?

“Well I got something that will let me know if you need me for anything.”

“You mean a baby monitor?”

“Well we can call it a kid monitor if you prefer, but yes. Now lift your arm for me honey” Tom complied and she gently soaped up his side “You don't mind do you?”

“I guess not” Tom said resignedly.

“Good boy” she said as she squirted a dollop of shampoo into he hand “I know you're probably disappointed about needing these things, but I just want to make sure you're safe. And it can't be that bad knowing I can keep an eye you can it?”

Tom looked down, wondering for a moment if she could read his thoughts.

She saw the bashful smile creeping across his face “I didn't think so. Now close your eyes.” She lathered his hair. “I need to get you in for a hair cut soon” she commented as she worked.

Tom stepped out of the tub and into the warm thick towel his mother was holding. She dried him off and ushered him into his room. She gave him another pass over with the towel before lifting him onto the changing table. Tom was momentarily surprised by the increasing ease with which she was able to help him up. But his attention was soon diverted to the new device sitting on a table next to his crib.

“It's got a camera too” She said as she retrieved a thick night-time diaper from the diaper stacker. She slid it under his freshly scrubbed bottom, taped it in place, and dressed him in his Pjs. “Now how about a bedtime story?”

She sat in the rocking chair and motioned for him to sit in her lap. He settled in while she took a book from the table “There's one more thing” she said getting one of the bottles he'd had at Mrs. Burke's house from the table as well. “I heard you like these.”

“Thank you” Tom said slightly embarrassed but thankful for the treat.

She began to rock gently as she held the nursing boy in her arms and read from the colorful pages. Tom barely followed the story. He was tired and the rocking was already lulling him to sleep.

She paused “Are you ready for bed sweety? We can finish this book later.”

Tom just nodded and rubbed his eyes.

Karen smiled “OK, up you go.” She rose from the rocking chair, helped him into his crib. Through the encroaching fuzziness of sleep Tom again noticed how easily she did this, his own effort was scarcely required.

She pulled the blankets up to his shoulders and after making sure his teddy was within reach she handed him his still half-full bottle. “Now if you need me you can just call alright?”

“OK mom.” Tom replied.

“Good night.” She kissed him the forehead and raised the rails into place.

“Good night mom” Tom said nestling himself into place.

She turned off the lights on the way out the door and Tom was left gazing through half-closed eyes at the dimly glowing light from his baby monitor. He could remember a time it would have been an unbearable intrusion. Now he seemed adrift in and endless sea of babyhood and the idea of there even being a shore faded further away every day. Some part of him still wanted to be a big kid to the outside world, but here at home this felt right. He drank from his bottle while he contemplated these things and was disappointed when the sweet warm formula ran out. He let the empty bottle roll from his hand as he fell asleep.

Some time in the middle of the night he came half awake and found a full bottle in its place. He smiled as he took it to his lips.

 

[Pierry Louys]

Awwww so happy to see this story back 

[BabySofia]

I have always loved how you created a world so much more advanced that it made sense he was too little. Glad to see that you're working to finish this as it was one of the great unfinished works out there!

[dmavn]

argh, why you havta write such a good story… it’s almost 4am and I’m supposed to be up at 7:30…

 

 

[Les Lea]

This is one of those tales that I've read and reread in the hope that one day it might be finished.

Hugs to you for coming back and adding to this glorious piece of regression.

Absolutely love it.

Les

[maly]

Thanks for continuing the story.

Maly.

[Little Matt]

Chapter 20

From the passenger window Tom watched the world pass by, busy with it's morning routines. Adults rushing to their cars, teenagers loping their way to high school, kids waiting for buses, lives distant from his own.

Up in the sky he spotted something that at first glance looked a bit like a hot-air balloon. He looked closer mystified by the floating contraption. It was suspended from a balloon, like what he'd seen before, but below hung a brightly glinting mass of silver gears. It seemed able to propel it's self back and forth with ease.

He watched in wonder as his mother pulled into the school parking lot. He unfastened his seat belt amd climbed out of the car as the craft disappeared behind the building. Without a second thought he stepped behind the car where he could get another view.

“Tommy!”

There was a squeal of breaks and a car came a hard stop just short of where he'd inattentively stepped into traffic. He stared at the car in shock for a moment before his mother pulled him aside, giving the driver a wave and an apology.

He looked up at her and saw the nearest thing to anger he'd seen in a long time. He averted her gaze and pointed off to the strange thing making it's way toward the horizon “I'm sorry, I was just trying to watch that thing over there.”

She took a deep breath, looked up at the odd object, and back at her son. Her expression softened into sympathy. “It's OK baby, I'm not mad. But...” she trailed off before kneeling down “You still have a lot to take in don't you?”

Tom nodded, wanting nothing more than to win her approval again.

She put a gentle hand to his chin and gave him a soft but serious look. “From now I want you hold my hand whenever we're around cars. OK?”

Tom nodded eagerly.

“And whenever else I ask” she raised a finger to make a point “And no arguing, just do it when I say.”

“OK, Mom.” Tom said.

“I was thinking that I should do some more more things to keep you safe anyway.” She stood and extended her hand.

Tom took it without any further prompting. She led him by the hand all the way into the building and into his preschool class. She chatted for a few moments with Mrs. Peterson, still keeping his hand in hers.

Tom looked around at the classroom he could have already been running off to, but knew he had to stay in place. Eventually she let go and put a hand to his shoulder. “Good boy, just hold my like that from now on.” She gave him a good-bye kiss “I'll see you later sweety.”

Tom watched her walk out the door his mood buoyed a bit by her praise. He was a bit embarrassed that it meant so much to him, but he just couldn't help himself. He turned around and joined his classmates, sitting on the sprawling carpet and playing with toys. Before long he was collared for a diaper check, found wet, and taken to be changed.

“Were you having a little trouble with the song yesterday?” Mrs. Hansley asked as she unsnapped his shortalls and pulled them down.

“Sort of, it's just that the words are kind of weird.”

She nodded as she untaped the sodden diaper “I thought so.” She tossed the diaper away and grabbed a fresh one from beneath the table. “I think I have something that will help. Just let me finish and I'll show you.”

Tom waited while his bottom was cleaned, powdered, and lowered onto a fresh diaper.

She snapped his shortalls back into place, set him down on the floor, and again reached under the table to retrieve something. Tom watched as she clipped a ribbon with pacifier at the end to his shirt.

Tom looked at it skeptically. “How is that going to help?”

She took it and held it up for him to see. He could see soft colored lights twinkling beneath the translucent outer layer. “This helps children like you say some of those big complicated words.”

“How?” Tom asked.

She tried to explain something about muscles in his mouth and tongue as simply as she could but it was well over his head.

She held it up to his lips “Do you want to give it a try?”

Tom thought for a moment and cautiously took it in his mouth. Almost by instinct he started sucking on it. Immediately it was relaxing, he was reminded of lying in his crib with a bottle. But there was something else, a small pleasant tingle that he guessed was a sign it was working.

“I thought you might like it.” Mrs. Hansley smiled. “Now go join the other children. It's story time” She turned him around in their direction and gave him a gentle swat on the bottom to send him on his way. Tom found a spot among the other preschoolers and sat with his pacifier in his mouth as Mrs. Peterson began reading the day's story. He sucked contentedly, feeling peaceful and calm. Around him many of his classmates were doing the same, some even beginning to nod off as nap time approached. And in a few moments they were all herded over to the cribs and tucked in.

Tom lay in his crib with is eyes closed and continued to enjoy his new paci as the lights were dimmed and his teachers turned on soothing lullaby music.

He awoke from his nap feeling especially refreshed. He was changed into a dry diaper and sent to play for a while before the class was again assembled to practice their song. He thought of how much his mother was looking forward to this and tried as best he could. It was still difficult but he could feel the words somehow slipping just a little easier from his mouth.

Late in the afternoon he was playing with a toy train when he heard his mother's voice behind him.

“How you doing there.” She said

“Mom! You're early” he said with surprise and impulsively gave her a hug.

She laughed and hugged him back “I thought we might get started on the weekend a little early. So what's this?” She said looking at the pacifier hanging from his shirt.

“That's just to help me learn the words to the song” he said blushing “I only use once in a while.”

She smiled “I bet.”

As they exited the building Tom took a few long strides toward the car before he heard his mother clear her throat. He stopped and put out his hand.

“Just try to remember, OK sweety?” she said before leading him on to the car.

“Now there's one small change I've decided to make.” She opened the rear door to reveal a car-seat positioned on the back seat. “I really should have done this earlier, you'll be much safer back here.”

He cast a glance around the parking lot, wondering who could be watching. This was still the sort of public babying he still felt some resistance to.

“But I like seeing things from the front” he said taking a half step back.

“The view will be even better from higher up.” She said nudging toward to the car.

Tom took a breath and stepped forward and tried climbing in but found it awkward.

“Need some help?” His mother asked.

“Maybe a little” Tom replied as he tried to negotiate the climb.

He was surprised to feel his mother's hands grab him from behind, lift him off the ground, and adroitly deposit him in the seat. He looked at her in shock. This was the first time she'd helped him up without any participation on his part. He wondered if she'd been holding back, letting him feel more independent than he was.

“There's a really good gym at work.” She said, noting his astonishment.

She quickly brought secured straps over his shoulders, across his waist, and between his legs; fastening them together in a small hockey-puck like contraption. One look at the strange mechanism and Tom knew he had no hope of either doing it or undoing it himself.

“Comfy?” She asked

Tom nodded.

“Better than that seat up front huh?”

Tom wasn't prepared to admit it yet, but it was. In fact it seemed shaped just for him. “It's OK” he offered.

She smiled. “Good to hear. I should have done this a long time ago.” She paused and smoothed his hair “I thought we could go to the toy store and then get some dinner. Would you like that?”

“Yeah.” Tom said, perking up enough at the mention of the toy store to put aside the slight embarrassment over being stuck in a car seat.

“OK then, let's go.” She shut the door and walked around the driver side of the car. As the the car pulled into traffic he acquainted himself with this new feeling. His feet dangled in the air, the harness held him snugly in his new softly padded seat. He felt safe. And his mother was right, his elevated perch gave him a better view of his surroundings. He was quickly absorbed in watching the world go by from this new vantage point.

The car came to a stop in toy store parking lot. Tom couldn't help it, he loved the toys he found in this town, and he was excited to find a new one. His mother came around to the side of the car.

“Need some help? She asked already reaching for the latch.

“Yes, please” Tom responded a little more eagerly than he wanted to.

She chuckled slightly and easily undid the restraints before lifting him from the car and setting him on the ground.

Tom turned in the direction of the store but just before he could bound off toward the store he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“What did I say to do?”

He stopped and took her hand. “Sorry mom.”

“That's OK honey. But it's really important so you don't get hurt.”

She escorted him to the stores entrance and turned him loose on the aisles of brightly colored amusements. As he roamed through the store taking in all the exciting possibilities, he same across an intriguing display. A set of odd looking building blocks had been constructed into a sky scraper with working lights. As he looked closer he saw it could be opened to reveal rooms, and even a working elevator.

He snatched up a box and hurriedly trotted over to where his mom was chatting with the college-aged woman at the counter. “Mom, I think I found something.”

She took the box and inspected it for a moment. “I don't know, this is kind of expensive. “ she said in a half-kidding tone “Are you sure you're going to remember to hold my hand?”

He squirmed as he saw the clerk hold back a chuckle. “Mooooom” he groaned.

“Are you?”

“Yes, I promise” he relented.

The new toy was scanned and payed for. She handed it back to him

Tom grinned as he took the box.

“Have fun” the clerk said as she gave gave him a wave.

As they stepped out of the store Tom reached for his Mother's hand.

“Good boy” she said giving his hand a gentle squeeze “I knew you'd remember.”

Tom was already happy to get his toy, but even the mild praise made him feel a little flutter.

He was led back to the car, set in his car seat, and fastened in.

“Would you like to go get some pizza? There's a place I heard of you might like.”

“Yeah pizza sounds good.”

Tom's eyes widened as they arrived at their destination. A towering wall of swirling blinking lights advertised “Barnaby Bear's Pizza Palace.” A giant animatronic bear smiled and waved into the distance above the words “Pizza, Games, Fun.”

He continued staring as he was lifted out of his car seat and sat down on his feet. The lights shimmered for a moment and slowly transformed themselves into an animated scene of Barnaby Bear playing in a band alongside another character. Tom blinked as he watched it somehow transform into 3D.

“Neat huh,” his mother said as she took his hand.

“I bet this place is really cool inside,” Tom enthused as he tugged with a bit of excitement on her hand.

She chuckled at his evident enthusiasm. “Well lets go get a table.”

And together they walked toward to the entrance.

 

[Pierry Louys]

Awww this chapter is very heartwarming!! Love that Tommy is being so carefree and happy with his new status 

[kerry]

Just wanted to chime in and join the people thanking you for coming back to this. As another writer with unfinished work out there, I know how difficult it is to get back into the mindset and I'm glad that you have.

This has always been one of those stories that absolutely pushes a lot of the right buttons for me, but it also has lots of unanswered questions. What was going on with that phone call Tommy overheard in one of the early chapters? How can this town even exist without its successes making national news and being copied everywhere? Without its people becoming the most important scientists in the nation? Did his mom grow up here? (Otherwise, how did she even know about the place and why has she never been even a little bit surprised at Tommy's regression? Not to mention her unusual strength...) If she did, how could she not have known what Tommy would find in the schools? Or did she, and decided to move there anyway? And about his potty training: how did he go from a boy who was appalled at even the suggestion that he might wet his pants at 13 to needing diapers so quickly? Will the LumiGro, which we were told loses its power as kids grow up, even work on him? He's thirteen even if he looks younger. And he is coming into this town so late...can he even "grow up"?

So many questions; that's just touching the surface. I'm happy to think we will finally be getting some of the answers!

[Sarah Penguin]

I'm gueissing this going to be exciting because it will be full of random teenagers having a horror  themed birthday party themed around tom's most favorite spookyflick. tom will swear of pizza.

[Little Matt]

Some of those questions will be answered. But I like a little of mystery. One the fun things about writing a story in an iterative fashion like this is they it morphs in your head over time. Some of my plot holes have become plot elements.

I'll answer the Lumigro thing right here though since the story may not have explained it well enough. My idea was that it stopped working after using it for some period of time. Since most kids use it in their cribs it's effects have been used up by the time they transition to beds. You can use it at whatever age but it's effects will weaken the more you use it. There's not enough demand for them in beds for them to be made.

 

[Doodlebug]

Oh my god, Little Matt, you have no idea how cool it is to see you back. I love this story - not just for the obvious things, but for the genuinely creative spin you've put on this trope. It's a whole universe with all these neat little gadgets and norms, and I just know that what fits into this story is just the tip of the iceberg of all the knowledge you've got in your head about it. 

The fact that you came back after all this time shows just how much effort goes into stories like these. I know I'm not alone in appreciating it. Thank you.

[LittleFenny]

Whoa! I'm pretty sure I remember the start of this one from earlier. I share many of the questions Kerry gave and I too am sitting here impressed at someone picking back up a story that's been sitting unfinished.

I'm guessing his mother is from the town originally, but how word of the place and its technology hasn't spread... Is this a Eureka? Like with the TV show, a town started specifically as a place to invite some of the best and brightest to move to and serve as a hidden center of research. A place the government knows about and realizes has become decidedly non-mainsteam but has a blind eye turned to that because of the success in raising generations of above average learners who have developed wonderful new technology.

I'm wondering how quickly Tommy might start to catch up. Even if he was well behind his local age-peers, he may still be able to catch up scholastically faster than he might expect. But, he seems to be adapting to the regression enough that I expect that there are shenanigans of some kind (possibly the lumigro thing is encouraging the loss of continence and acceptance along with the subliminal learning). I wonder if he'll be ready to give up the new closeness to his mother even if he's ready to go back to grade school in the new school year. If this town so readily embraces this, I wonder if they might be much more willing to have a student still be in diapers or training pants.

[Sarah Penguin]

Quote

 

The only full baby experences tommy are missing are being fed baby food and being put into a highchair. I can totally imagine imagine there being special brain boosting effects that like cribtech stuff will stop working after a certain amount of exposure so all the real babies are ahead him because that has beern added to the towns babyfood for decades at the plant.

[maly]

Please sir can we have some more? ?

Maly.

[Little Matt]

Chapter 21

They walked inside and were greeted by a smiling hostess.

“Welcome to Barnaby Bear's,” she said “table for two?”

Tom glanced around. Two entrances led off from the lobby. From one labeled Barnaby's Big Canyon came a cacophony of digitized explosions and the shouts of older children. From Little Bear Valley from a gentler wave of beeps and bells and happy giggles of preschoolers.

The hostess looked at Tom in his shortalls with a pacifier dangling from his shirt. “I'm guessing you want Little Bear Valley?”

Tom looked up at his mom. He wondered what her response would be, but he was pretty sure he knew the answer.

She thought for a moment. “What do think hon?”

Tom was surprised. He wasn't sure what to say. Little Bear Valley looked more inviting but he couldn't quite admit it. “I want to try Big Canyon,” he said with some hesitation.

The hostess looked to his mother for confirmation. “I think we'll try being big tonight,” she said with a hint of skepticism.

“OK, just follow me” she gathered menus and headed for Tom's chosen section. As they came through the entrance Tom saw why they called it a Canyon. From the top of a spiraling staircase, he had a full view of a vast cavernous arcade from which a chaotic din roared. Down below elementary school-aged children ran rambunctiously through a maze of complicated-looking arcade games. Their parents were seated in another section leaving their kids to play independently and free of supervision. It was a view into a world Tom had almost forgotten about. Suddenly a pang of worry gripped him. He hesitated at the top of the stairs. His mothered paused “Something wrong?” she asked.

He looked at the ground “I think... maybe Little Bear Valley would be better” he admitted.

His mother smiled “This does look pretty crowded, let's try the other room.”

Tom was surprised to feel more relieved that he had the option than embarrassed that he took it. He followed the two adults as they reversed course and headed for the other room. There they found a wide-open space, filled with colorful games and other activities. Small children happily ran about playing among themselves, some nestled for a rest in their parents' laps. From a stage featuring The Barnaby, Bear Band came happy music.

The tables were long with bench-like seating allowing families to mix as their children found new playmates. The hostess led them to a table. As they sat down she knelt next to Tom and strapped a watch-like device to his wrist. “This will let you play all the games and there might be a surprise later.”

He thanked her and after his mother had ordered a large pepperoni pizza she left with a pat on his head. Tom almost immediately started to head over to the games.

“Wait,” she called after him “Just come here for a sec sweety.”

He walked over to her she quickly checked his diaper. “You're fine for now. Go have fun.” She gave him a swat on the bottom as he hurried off to play.

He spotted an odd-looking machine at the edge of the play area. It had no monitor, no controls, nothing that would give it away as an arcade game aside from the label “Rescue Rick” emblazoned on the side. He walked over to it curiously and examined it for a moment. He stepped carefully onto a small platform in front of the strange thing. Almost without thinking, he waved his wrist over the round pad that protruded from the front. The machine beeped but nothing else happened. He'd decided it was broken when a helmet suddenly lowered onto his head. A goggle-like device fit itself across his face. He blinked and took a moment to focus. He was in a brightly colored cartoon world, as he moved his head around the scenery followed.

As he took it all in he became aware of a voice encouraging him to reach out his hands. As he did he saw two animated hands stretching in front of him. He moved his hands around and wiggled his fingers. Somehow his cartoon world hands moved in sync. A fire hydrant materialized in front of him and instinctively he took a step towards it. He could feel the platform gliding beneath him like a treadmill and he moved forward in the virtual world.

This was the most amazing video game he'd ever seen. The goal, he quickly learned, was to attach a hose to the hydrant and then put out a fire in as little time as possible. It was very clearly geared toward a preschool sensibility. With a cheerful dalmatian tagging along to offer advice and encouragement. But everything about it simply appealed to him. After a few rounds of increasing difficulty, he finally failed to beat the timer. A voice from the speaker gently broke the news and praised his efforts before the helmet was lifted from his head, bringing him back to the real world.

For the next short while, he sprinted from machine to machine. Tom knew his friends back home would have dismissed them all for being too cutesy, too babyish. But he was having far too much fun to care. He was so caught up in play that he was slightly startled to feel a hand on his shoulder.

“Having fun sweetheart?” his mother asked.

He nodded enthusiastically as she knelt beside him.

“It sure looked like it.” She checked his diaper and nodded. “I thought you were looking a little droopy. You're just about to leak. Let's take care of that,” she said taking his hand.

Reluctantly Tom allowed her to lead him from his fun towards the changing room located conveniently just off the main area. Inside were several changing tables, some already occupied by toddlers being changed. She lifted him onto a table and paused for a moment. Smiling she took his pacifier and popped it in his mouth. “You've been playing really hard, just relax a moment baby,” she said.

As she started gathering all the necessary supplies from the diaper bag the door opened again and a tall smartly-dressed woman entered trailed by a boy excitedly relating a story about one of the video games he'd been playing. They walked over to the one available table next to Tom and his mother. As he was lifted into place he pointed a pudgy finger at Tom and exclaimed “That boy is in my class!”

Tom blushed slightly. He was getting used to being changed in front of other people, but to be pointed out was new. He meekly returned the boy's enthusiastic wave.

The woman looked at Tom nursing his pacifier and smiled. “Cute” she commented “I wish I could get mine to take a paci sometimes” she joked as the boy continued to chatter on.

“Thank you,” Karen said as she pulled Tom's pants to his ankles “He's cute too. I'm sure he'll grow up to be a great conversationalist.”

“Oh no, don't even say 'grow up,” the woman chided kiddingly “I'm not ready to lose my baby yet. I just love having a little one to look after. One minute you're teaching them linear equations and the next they're out of the house.”

Karen nodded. “I feel very lucky.,” She said and smiled playfully at Tom. She shook some powder out onto her son's bottom before setting it down on a fresh diaper. “I'm Karen Welton by the way. And this is Tommy,” she said as she taped the diaper onto the now blushing boy.

“Nicole Wilson and this is Josh. Nice to meet you.”

They continued to chat as they exited the changing room. Tom felt Josh tugging on his arm “Let's go play in the ball pit” the younger boy suggested excitedly. He looked up at his mother skeptically. “You two go ahead and play,” she said letting go of his hand “I'll come get you when the pizza's ready.”

Tom wondered how a ball pit could be more fun than the games he'd already played. And while it was one thing to play alongside children like Josh when he had no other choice, this seemed different. Josh sprinted towards a glass booth and tugged open the door. “Come on” he shouted.

“Go on,” she encouraged again “I bet you'll have lots of fun.”

Hesitantly, Tom followed him inside and took a seat amid the plastic balls, feeling rather unimpressed. Josh closed the door behind them and waved his plastic bracelet over the nearby reader. Suddenly he found himself sprawled out on the bottom of the pit as the balls beneath him lept into the air.

Josh giggled at his plight. “You're supposed to stand up, silly.” He said.

Tom got up on his feet and looked around him in amazement as the multicolored balls began to swirl around the room. Josh squealed with delight as he dashed around. For a few moments, Tom just watched as Josh ran about the enclosure sometimes grabbing one from the air only to throw it back into the whirling current. Other times he'd plow through a cloud of the plastic things sending them ping-ponging into others. Tom stuck out an arm and let a few bounce off his hand before grabbing one and tossing it into the air. He watched it rejoin its peers and felt a grin cross his face. In a moment he had joined in right alongside his companion taking pure joy in the toddler-oriented amusement.

He'd completely lost track of time when he hear a gentle knock on the door. He turned to see both his and Josh's mothers standing there. Josh quickly swiped his bracelet again and the balls fell back to the ground. The younger boy opened the door and hopped out chattering happily about his experience. Tom followed bashfully, knowing he'd let himself get caught up in something juvenile.

“You must have been having fun,” his mother said “You really didn't hear me calling?”

“I'm sorry,” Tom said as they both headed back toward their table “I guess I just got caught up.”

“That's OK. I'm glad you were having fun.”

As they approached the table Tom noticed two pizzas and two sippy cups alongside. “Mrs. Wilson and I were talking and we thought we could all sit together,” His mother explained.

It hardly mattered to Tom he was beginning to realize that he was starving. He sat down and the group began eating. The conversation drifted to and fro over various subjects until the topic of potty training came up. Tom tried to focus on the animatronic band that had just started playing but he couldn't help listening in on what the two mothers were saying.

“I think it's going to be a while before we're even thinking about getting this guy in big boy pants.” She smiled at her son who sat enraptured by the show oblivious to the topic under discussion.

“Even then it might not stick” Karen averred “We hit a little snag and had to go back to diapers. And I think it might be some time before he's out.”

Tom blushed a crimson red “Moooom.”

Nicole chuckled slightly “There's no reason to be embarrassed. No matter how big you think you are all I see is a little boy like Joshy. He's not embarrassed at all.”

“It's just that...” Tom trailed off unsure of what his point was.

“You're way too cute to be thinking you're a big boy. You should just be happy you have a good mommy to take care of you.”

Tom just blushed brighter.

“That's what I keep trying to tell him,” Karen spoke up “And sometimes I think you're starting to get it,” she added poking him in the ribs.

Tom squirmed in his seat. To his relief, the music started to pick up causing the conversation to pause. Slowly he was finding himself more and more drawn into the show. The characters on stage were so lifelike, and the music was catchy. Before he knew what he was doing he was swaying along and even mouthing the words of the chorus. He glanced around the room and realized he was doing the same thing all the other children were doing. A sense of self-consciousness began to intrude on his fun until he noticed his mother smiling at him enjoying himself and continued doing as he was.

After a few songs, the music faded away and the stage lights dimmed. A happy voice came over the speakers “OK boys and girls it's time to play Musical Catch,” Tom just gave a puzzled look around the room as all the other children began to eagerly raise their bracelets in the air. “Now everybody reach up really high, and whoever has the ball when the music stops wins a Barnaby Bear Teddy Bear.”

Tom sat frozen, unsure whether he should participate. “Go ahead honey,” his mother encouraged. And he hesitantly raised his arm. A jaunty tune began to play and to his astonishment, a blue ball of light began to bounce around the room from bracelet to bracelet monetarily causing each to vibrate and flicker.

The ball hit Tom's bracelet three times, each time flying off towards another child's. On the fourth time the music came to a sudden halt and his bracelet grew bright red.

Tom just stared in disbelief for a moment. The waitress who had shown them to their seat stepped out into the middle of the floor in front of the stage holding a small teddy bear and beckoned him over. Not knowing what to do next he looked to his mother. “Go on honey,” she said “You won.”

Warily he got up and slowly made his way across the floor. A wave of “awws” came over the room as he did. The waitress knelt as he approached. “And what's your name,” she said into a small microphone before tilting it towards him. Tom looked over the crowd and saw the sort of gentle smiles one reserves for small children. He realized that no matter his size or age, they saw something truer about him. He breathed in slightly. “Tommy,” he said surprised at how naturally it came.

“Well congratulations Tommy, here's your Barnaby Bear Teddy Bear.” the waitress said as she handed him a big brown teddy dressed in a flannel shirt. Tommy took it and quickly walked back to his mother to another chorus of “awws.”

She smiled at him as he sat down next to her. “That's a cute bear,” she said as put an arm around him. Tommy nodded and smiled back at her. He set the bear in his lap and nestled up against her as he watched the rest of the show.

[D503]

Adorable chapter, and such an awesome story, thanks.

[Pierry Louys]

Really love this story ! Always bring me a smile to read a new chapter

[maly]

This is such a sweet story. Thanks.

Maly.

 

[Enthusi]

Great story! 

[Little Matt]

Whoops, just noticed that a paragraph got lost somehow. It's not in my local document either so I must have goofed somehow. It's right where he wins the bear. I've rewritten it as best as I can remember. Sorry if that bit didn't make sense.

[Sarah Penguin]

[parkintochter]

I love how he slowly regresses because he is unable to take off his pants alone.

 

But a little thing that is kind of odd is that he never has to use the bathroom for number 2. I'm not a big fan for messing but I think it is a missed opportunity. I'd love to read him asking his mom about the potty and she just says no.

[Pierry Louys]

2 hours ago, parkintochter said:

I love how he slowly regresses because he is unable to take off his pants alone.

 

But a little thing that is kind of odd is that he never has to use the bathroom for number 2. I'm not a big fan for messing but I think it is a missed opportunity. I'd love to read him asking his mom about the potty and she just says no.

I asked this same question years ago and the author says that he don’t feel comfortable describing poopy scenes ! So he says tommy poopy in the background of the story the part that don’t show rsrs

[Little Matt]

I've been writing some bits were the reason he needs a change is ambiguous. The last thing I want to do is yuck anybody's yum, but messy stuff just isn't my thing. I've tried writing it and the results just weren't very good.

Anyway, here's another chapter. I think I might be able to pick up the pace a little bit. Could be done in about a month maybe.

 

Chapter 22

Tommy laid awake, his eyes still shut. He could smell his mother's coffee already brewing in the kitchen downstairs and hear a bird gently singing in the backyard tree. Under one arm he held his new teddy while the other bear stood guard over one corner of his crib. He nursed drowsily on the last of his nighttime bottle.

He heard the door creak carefully open. The sound of footsteps slowly approached. He opened his eyes and looked up at his mother.

“Good morning baby. You looked so cozy I didn't want to wake you up.”

“Good morning. It's OK. I was just resting.”

“In that case, let's get you ready for the day.” She lowered the side of the crib and scooped him up. Tommy was once again surprised at how casually she could do this. And t only seemed to be getting easier. She laid him down on the changing table and began getting him out of his sleeper.

“There's a nice big park by the lake. Would you like to go? We could have a nice walk, get some lunch, and they even have a zoo.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Tommy replied as he was relieved of his night-time diaper.

“That's what we'll do then,” she said as she retrieved a fresh diaper from beneath the table. She quickly cleaned her son with a baby wipe and powdered him thoroughly before setting his bottom on the new diaper. She taped him up, let him down on his feet, and walked over to his closet.

“I got you some new things,” she said as she gathered a few items of clothing. She turned around. In one hand was a pair of blue corduroy shorts. In the other, a white sweater knitted with a smiling bunny's face on the front. I just thought this was too cute to resist. Do you like it?” she asked almost pleading.

It wasn't any more babyish than his school uniform, but it had been some time since he'd been dressed in something hand-picked for cuteness. Even so, as he looked at her hopeful expression, Tommy felt like he had to give something back. If his mother wanted to see him in this outfit, he wasn't about to refuse. “It looks good mom.”

She smiled “Glad you like it.”

She helped him into the shorts, snapped them up, and adjusted them into a comfortable position. “Almost there,” she said as she pulled the sweater down over his head, and helped him get his arms in. She took a moment to straighten everything out and looked him over. “You look sweet” clearly pleased with the results as she clipped his pacifier to his sweater.

Tommy could see that things were still changing. A very short time ago she'd have said something like “handsome” even if she meant the same thing. “Thanks, mom,” he said.

She made them both a batch of blueberry pancakes for breakfast and they sat together and discussed their plans for the day.

“I need to go by work before the park,” she said as she got up and got his diaper bag. “I just need to check on something.” she sat it down on the table and began assembling the day's supplies.

Tommy felt a pang of disappointment, he didn't want to waste time in a boring office. “Do you have to?” he said.

"I do,” she said as she got a wipe from its package “Are you going to be a good boy and come along without complaining?” She cleaned a bit of syrup from his mouth.

Tommy squirmed a bit at the cold wipe but didn't protest. “Yes mom,” he said resignedly.
She produced a comb from within the bag and went to work fixing his hair. “Good boy.”

“You don't have to do everything for me,” he said, though he allowed her to continue.

“I just want you to look nice. You don't really mind do you?”

“Not really, I guess.” He thought for a moment “Do you?”

She laughed “No sweety, not at all.”

Once she was satisfied she shouldered the diaper bag and led Tommy out to the car, taking care to grab some spare diapers from the stash in the living room. Once he was secure in his car seat they started for her work.

Tommy started to wonder what his mom's work looked like. He knew she was some sort of scientist, but he never really understood what she did. As they pulled iup he gazed in wonder at the huge glass structure that rose into the sky from a flourishing garden. Inside he could make out what looked like a waterfall rolling down one side of the atrium.

“You work here?” he asked in amazement he was released from his restraints and set on the ground.

“I bet you didn't think I did anything cool huh?

Tommy took her hand eagerly and made they made their way across the parking lot. Inside the building, he looked up in awe at the waterfall roaring down over a mossy rock face that ran up the side of the towering atrium. The sheer size of it made him feel small. As the approached the elevators he felt a squeeze on his hand and realized his mother had been holding it all this time.

“Neat huh?” She said.

“Yeah, this place is amazing.” He said in wonderment. He looked to his right and saw what had to be the gym his mother was talking about. It was full of strange-looking pieces of equipment that glowed and hummed. In one corner a woman hoisted a large weight over her head with little apparent effort.

“Is that the gym you use?” Tommy asked

“Yes, some people like to come in on the weekends.”

As they stepped into the elevator he did nothing to pull his hand away from hers. They were inside well away from any danger posed by a car, it simply felt nice.

The elevator dinged at their chosen floor and they walked a short way down the hallway and into a sprawling room filled with rows of cubicles above which were banks of monitors showing lists of numbers, graphs, and what appeared to be diagrams of new inventions. He imagined that some of them must be even more advanced than all the strange devices he encountered since moving here. In one corner a monitor displayed a map of the world studded with dots each of which had a future date next to it.

They came to the cubicle labeled Karen Welton where they finally entered. She quickly set down the diaper bag and turned to a woman who was working in the cubicle immediately across from her's. “Janet, I'm so glad you're here” she greeted her coworker “I just need to go into the lab for a moment. Could you watch this guy for just a second?”

Janet turned from her work. “Oh hi Karen, I didn't see you come in. Yes, I can watch Tommy.”

“Thank you” Karen replied letting go of Tommy's hand. “He shouldn't be much of a bother and it will only be a sec.” She knelt down and looked Tommy in the face “Be good for Mrs. Weaver. I'll be right back.”

Tommy nodded “OK mom.”

“I know you will,” she said and gave him a kiss on the cheek. She turned and thanked her colleague and hurried off to complete her errand.

Mrs. Weaver spun her chair around to face the boy. “Hi Tommy!” she said smiling “It's nice to meet you. Your mommy's told me so much about you.”

“Hi” Tommy replied feeling a little self-consciousness as he looked over his mother's desk and noticed several pictures of himself scattered among diagrams of molecules and pictures of what looked like a giant windmill. “Nice to meet you too.”

He looked at the strange blueprint Mrs. Weaver had on her monitor, it looked something like a satellite dish pointed straight up with a set of thin antennas rising from the rim. “What's that thing?”

“Oh, this is a Storm Catcher. When a storm passes over the city these attract all the energy out of it then it can be used to make electricity. The storms get really loud though. And the lightning does some strange stuff. Some kids get scared.”

Tommy dismissed the notion. As much as things had changed he just couldn't see himself being scared of something like a little storm even a loud one. “I don't think I would.”

Mrs. Weaver chuckled “I'm sure you're very brave. But they're pretty loud, and the lightning gets really wild so it's OK to be scared.”

Tommy just nodded and looked back at the pictures sitting on his mother's desk. “Does she really talk about me?” he asked.

“All the time,” Mrs. Weaver replied with a grin. “She's really proud of how well you're doing in preschool. She told me all about the little picture you made for her. And just yesterday she was bragging about how cute you are sleeping in your crib.”

Tommy blushed. But he smiled too.

“And” Mrs. Weaver continued “I know she's really looking forward to hearing you sing with your preschool class.”

“Oh yeah,” Tommy replied having genuinely forgotten about it “Some of those words are really hard.”

Mrs. Weaver nodded “Lots of little kids have trouble with them. But I know you'll try your best and make her really proud.”

He looked over her desk again “What's sulfur dioxide conversion?” he asked.

“Just something your mommy is working on.”

They were interrupted by her return.

“Thank you, Janet. I hope he wasn't too much trouble.” She said as she set a folder down on her desk.

“Not at all Karen. We were just chatting. I think he might need a change though. He's squirming the way mine used to when they were wet and didn't quite know it.”

She knelt down and checked Tommy's diaper. “Good eye as always,” she said as she shouldered the diaper bag. “Thanks for watching him. See you Monday.”

She took Tommy's hand. “Don't forget to say bye.” she admonished.

He resisted moaning at this unnecessary motherly reminder. “Bye Mrs. Weaver,” he said.

“Bye Tommy, bye Karen. See you Monday.”

She led her son back out of the office and further down the hallway.

“Let's get you changed,” she said as she opened the restroom door.

Tommy was almost surprised to see a standard restroom with no obvious advanced technology until his mother waved her hand in front of a panel and a changing table emerged from the wall.

“Why do they have those here?” he asked.

“Because lots of people like me have to come into work with kiddos who are still in diapers” she lifted him up onto the table “and sometimes we need to change their little bottoms.'

Tommy rolled his eyes “Mooooom.” A hint of laughter crept into his groan.

She laughed “Well it's all true.” She slid his shorts down and undid the tapes of his diaper. “And we get to show off our cute little guys to our coworkers too.”

He pretended not to pay attention but the blush coming over his cheeks gave him away.

She took his ankles and pushed his knees towards his chest lifting his bottom from the wet diaper.
“Thank you for being good for Mrs. Weaver. I can tell she enjoyed chatting with you.”

“She was nice. She told me about those storm catcher things.”

Karen nodded as she opened a bottle of baby powder. “She's working on an improvement to the design. Those things make some really amazing storms. I sure hope they aren't too scary.” She dusted his bottom and set him down on a dry diaper.

“Are they really that scary?” he asked with a slightly worried tone.

“Lots of kids think so,” she said as she brought one end of the diaper up against his stomach.”

He thought for a moment “I don't think they could be that scary.”

She gave him a skeptical smile as she taped his teddy bear festooned diaper into place. “Well if they are too scary I'll be here for you.” She pulled his shorts back into place and set him down on the ground.

“Thanks, mom, but I probably won't be scared.”

“I'm telling you just in case sweety”

Without prompting he took her hand.

“Now let's go to the park. It should be a fun day.”

And together they walked back to the car.