Interesting situation

[NightWitch]

After years of wearing diapers for fun and day dreaming of nighttime incontinence, I’ve found myself with some minor daytime incontinence (due to a new medication). Today I made the leap and started wearing pull-ups. The day went pretty well. I’m just really trying to wrap my head around all this. On one hand, a form of incontinence as always been a fantasy of mine. But now that it’s happening I feel..almost sad. This isn’t quite what I wanted. I have a few events coming up that will require me to be away from any bathrooms for awhile and I’m feeling anxious about trying to navigate these social situations in a pull up. Tell me this feeling goes away?

[feralfreak]

what you might be getting down about is that now you have no choice, as for this feeling going away, that is up to you, how you accept this new reality, just remember, you wear the diapers, they dont wear you, so get some nice absorbent ones and go about your life.

[dlinmsp]

As I approach my 70s, I think back on the decades that I have been diapered.  Having been 24/7 in diapers for over 9 years, wetting has become natural.  I wore diapers the last 6.5 years I worked and no one ever said anything.  I have been diapered for bed every night since 2008 and am just now starting to wet in my sleep.  My day wetting is so natural that I often don't remember it happening. but I usually know that I have to pee.

For me, this feeling has never gone away.  I enjoy each new diaper I wear like it was the first.  Most will never notice our special underwear.  I have never had anyone ask me about my diapers and plastic pants.  I wish I had the variety of choices to use when I was your age.

I also would have liked to have gone 24/7 long before I did.  Diapers are a great journey and one I have thoroughly enjoyed.

[Kawaharu]

What it sounds like is that your at a point where you can no longer wear adult underwear or pull ups and would be looking at wearing diapers instead of adult underwear. It seems like you don't have that choice anymore and may soon have to accept the reality that your gona be in diapers.

For me, being incontinent and diaper dependent is normal and it's something that I am so use to. Diapers are special underwear that most people will never know or understand. 

[AwakenEvil]

Some medication can seriously mess with you. @Glennie And I had some topics on a medication I'm on and it took me about a week to get used to it but if you had a thing for shitting yourself this medication would do the trick I promise. Glad my A1C is down to 6.1 and just waiting on my next blood draw so I can get off this crap!

[Glennie]

On 4/25/2022 at 9:53 PM, NightWitch said:

After years of wearing diapers for fun and day dreaming of nighttime incontinence, I’ve found myself with some minor daytime incontinence (due to a new medication). Today I made the leap and started wearing pull-ups. The day went pretty well. I’m just really trying to wrap my head around all this. On one hand, a form of incontinence as always been a fantasy of mine. But now that it’s happening I feel..almost sad. This isn’t quite what I wanted. I have a few events coming up that will require me to be away from any bathrooms for awhile and I’m feeling anxious about trying to navigate these social situations in a pull up. Tell me this feeling goes away?

dude.. welcome to my full time world. Thank god I'm not on oral diabetes medications anymore because I have a serious intolerance to them. The best thing to have ever happen to me was my drs putting me on injectable insulin.  I had a Dr literally say, just carry extra diapers with you. (yes I am also urinary incontinent, which is very well noted in my medical records). I have struggled off and on my entire life with being clean and dry.  Its no fun when you learn you will literally have almost no control over your bowels. Its seems like a bunch of fun until you are wearing a pair of crap filled pants and you don't remember doing anything to have caused it. It was embarrassing the first few months and I was still in full denial. you can hide a peed diaper for a while to a point, but when you crap your pampers, its gonna smell and people are going to notice, and if by some luck, people don't notice, the constant diaper rash you get from the burning butthole is even worse. You don't get a break from it. The rash just keeps on coming. I finally gave up and started wearing diapers full time the week I had 7 full blown, s.h.i.t. my socks episodes. and yes I meant to say that. You learn pretty quickly that a diaper is really just a fancy containment system that keeps your socks and shoes clean. Gravity is not your friend when it comes to a leaky rearend gasket. I would love to be able to go somewhere and not bring a bag with me or preplan a diaper change. Everyone in my life knows I wear diapers 24/7, because I had to get over hiding it. That means co-workers, friend and family all know, you wear diapers and will require extra time to get changed from time to time. Being incontinent has a tendency to isolate you to a point. some people don't want to take you places because of your handicap. Its sickens me when I hear of people that are going out of their way to cause permanent harm to they bowels or bladder. give it time. live your young life first.. Btw.. not many sexual partners will find it sexy when you have to go take a shower before you have sex, so that you don't smell like a toilet. THINK REALLY REALLY HARD, before you do something dumb. However if you do something stupid, document it well so we have good examples of what not to do

[zzyzx]

8 hours ago, AwakenEvil said:

Some medication can seriously mess with you. @Glennie And I had some topics on a medication I'm on and it took me about a week to get used to it but if you had a thing for shitting yourself this medication would do the trick I promise. Glad my A1C is down to 6.1 and just waiting on my next blood draw so I can get off this crap!

Ah, yes, Metformin (sp?).  I'm at a dose that I can tell I'm no longer on the more constipated side of the line.  Not my only medication that has some warnings in this area, but was the last one added and not planning to take the level any higher than I'm currently taking it.  And something you only want to take as part of trying to control glucose levels. 

@AwakenEvilCongratulations on getting down to 6.1 on A1C.

[NightWitch]

Just a little update! I’m still wearing pull-ups pretty much 24/7. It’s been a bit of an adjustment. I had one major leak in the car on the way to work. I’ve had a few leaks at home, but not a big deal. I’m lucky enough to have a partner that is very accepting and helpful. We’ve been incorporating abdl stuff into our sex life for years so the transition into actually needing to wear pull-ups was fairly easy in that aspect. I’m starting to feel a little more acceptance towards my new level of continence. 

[Stroller]

6 hours ago, NightWitch said:

I’m starting to feel a little more acceptance towards my new level of continence.

Acceptance is a good way to start.  Why not use it as part of a big new DL adventure?  I did that by choice, but I've never looked back.  When your medical situation changes you probably won't need to wear pullups any more, but in the meantime go for it and enjoy it.  It sounds like you've got the right partner, so you're not on your own.  And just maybe, you'll decide to stay in nappies anyway.  Good luck!

[Kawaharu]

14 hours ago, NightWitch said:

I’m starting to feel a little more acceptance towards my new level of continence. 

Acceptance is a good starting point. Once you accept that your gonna be in diapers for a long time. It gets easier and better over time.

in my case, at first I didn’t realize I needed diapers but as I leaked more and more. I realize I needed them and knew I was gonna be in them for a very long time time. It’s why now, I’m so use to and completely comfortable in being kept in diapers. I’m use to knowing that I’m not gonna be potty trained anytime soon. I know I’m gonna be kept in diapers permanently. 

[NightWitch]

Hi everyone! 
 Little update! Still dealing with the same issues. I’m still wearing pull-ups to work and outside of the house most of the time. But I have been wearing actual diapers at home during the day. I’m not struggling with any nighttime accidents so only pull-ups at night. So overall things are going pretty well. My partner is still super supportive. 

[NightWitch]

Update 

 I had few events/appointments this last week that I wasn’t totally comfortable attending in diapers/pull ups. And wow was that harder than I thought it would be! I find that I can only go about 45 minutes without feeling like I have to go use the bathroom. I had one close call that resulted in slightly damp panties. But at least it was on my walk back into my house. It felt so great to put on a thick diaper after being out without any protection. Good to know that I can still manage without but definitely confirms it, I belong in diapers. 

[deewet]

Just a friendly reminder that there are some very good and discrete items available today that fit into your regular underwear that will provide protection for most dribbles and small voids.  Why not take advantage of those products as opposed to going out without anything even for special events?

[Little Sherri]

On 4/25/2022 at 9:53 PM, NightWitch said:

Tell me this feeling goes away?

I'm just over 3.5 years in diapers 24/7; after a while, the trepidation you initially feel goes away completely, for most situations, save ones that you have not experienced often. For me, about the only time I have a twinge of anxiety is when I'm clearing security at an airport (the body scanner sees all and knows all), and at medical appointments. A new situation has recently been added to my plate, because my wife realized I haven't used any of my benefits this year, and they reset in January, so she booked me a massage at an RMT clinic. That is one thing I have not done wearing a diaper before. Generally, people stay in their underwear for a massage in this area of the world, so I'll probably add shorts and just decline to take them off if asked. 

[rusty pins]

6 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

A new situation has recently been added to my plate, because my wife realized I haven't used any of my benefits this year, and they reset in January, so she booked me a massage at an RMT clinic. That is one thing I have not done wearing a diaper before. Generally, people stay in their underwear for a massage in this area of the world, so I'll probably add shorts and just decline to take them off if asked. 

I have been having massages for the past 3 years, always in diapers.  I let the massage therapists know ahead of time when I first contacted them I have bladder issues and wear protection (not sure if they were expecting Depends pull on underwear), but I wear a premium plastic backed diaper.  All 3 therapists said it's not a problem, they have other clients with bladder issues who wear protection and one even worked as a therapist at the local hospital giving massages to cancer patients.  I do have frequent need to urinate and when massaging my lower back a diaper is a good idea to prevent accidents.  I have a sheet over my bottom when getting a massage but the therapist does have to push my diaper down some to massage my lower back and I'm sure they see parts of it, but they are professionals and trained massage therapists, not those Asian sex massage places.  Just like a doctor, they have seen it all before. 

[bedwetter59]

I would love to go and have a massage. But I have tried it

[babykeiff]

On 4/26/2022 at 2:53 AM, NightWitch said:

After years of wearing diapers for fun and day dreaming of nighttime incontinence, I’ve found myself with some minor daytime incontinence (due to a new medication). Today I made the leap and started wearing pull-ups. The day went pretty well. I’m just really trying to wrap my head around all this. On one hand, a form of incontinence as always been a fantasy of mine. But now that it’s happening I feel..almost sad. This isn’t quite what I wanted. I have a few events coming up that will require me to be away from any bathrooms for awhile and I’m feeling anxious about trying to navigate these social situations in a pull up. Tell me this feeling goes away?

@NightWitch Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you aproach this, your body has made the decision to sate what it percieves you want and use the diapers instead of witholding it. The uncertainty and anxiety that you are feeling will subside but it requires you to fully accept your situation rather than fight it.

Options:-

1: Go back to diapers full time.

2: Toilet train.

Resultant of 1 - Diapers /  pull-ups etc are just a choice of underwear, nothing more, nothing less - and it it this you need to convince yourself. Also, wearing diapers 24/7/365 need changes in behaviour etc.

Resultant of 2: There are training methodologies that exist (similar to what you went through as a child) in potty training, but that type of training is not suitable for most adult lives - it is very inconvenient to be naked from waist down and spend your days in a rooms where there is a potty in the corner, and the floor is of a type that a wet or messy accident can be wiped up easily.

Conclusion -

You have to make a choice in whether you

• re-potty train and deal with the normal accidents that a toilet training child would have to deal with for the next number of years. A child will have accidents in increasing rarety until they are about 16+. This equates that potty training takes between 1 - 16 years to complete, and for many, this is never really achieved.

OR

• Accept that you are now are diaper dependent, and alter your underwear accordingly.

You are in a better situation than most in that you have a supporting partner, and a lot of support on this site amongst others.

Anxiety is based on fear, and the fear is that someone else will find out. Who do you fear will find out, and even if they do, what do you think will be the result. This, you can discuss with your partner, and both of you can work out the issues and a protection mechanism to help you. These fears are normally without any basis, and usually, people are surprised at the support that they get from the person / people they fear the most.

I wear, and use diapers (wet & mess) 24/7/365 myself due to control issues. I, and others on this site, have been dealing with the need to wear diapers a long long time. Yes, over the years I have lost so called friends and also gained new friends. It has made me more tolerant and accepting of others, and I think that it has made me a better person. Yes, I do have a partner who is fully aware of my diaper needs, and I have found that both work and home life has changed for the better and the fears that sometimes show their ugly head is just my mind creating fictious scenarios that never exist. Anxiety is normal, but we as humans are well capable of handling this... and it will make us stronger and more self reliant. For me, it has brought my partner and I closer together where my partner knows me even better that I know myself. It has taught me what actually is of value, and what (or whom) is disposable.

[babykeiff]

On 11/21/2022 at 2:25 AM, NightWitch said:

Update 

 I had few events/appointments this last week that I wasn’t totally comfortable attending in diapers/pull ups. And wow was that harder than I thought it would be! I find that I can only go about 45 minutes without feeling like I have to go use the bathroom. I had one close call that resulted in slightly damp panties. But at least it was on my walk back into my house. It felt so great to put on a thick diaper after being out without any protection. Good to know that I can still manage without but definitely confirms it, I belong in diapers. 

@NightWitch I didn't see your update before  this post . It seems that you have made the call to change your underwear type rather than re-toilet train. I do hope that your anxiety has subsided and that you are in the process of addressing the rational and irrational fears you portrayed in your post.

You may already be aware, there are full mat thick baby like diapers for adults as well as discrete medical type diapers (still functional enough to last a few hours) where you might be self contious and anxious in a public / semi-public environment which I suggest you get for such occasions. Changing your wardrobe so that you wear tights and a dress instead of tight jeans etc can also help hide the diaper bulge. In reality, most people do not notice another adults underwear unless it is flaunted. Only you and your partner know the rough size of your bottom, so trying to work out if someone is wearing a diaper or has a fat butt is not usually that easy. Yes, we can tell if a baby / toddler is wearing a diaper due to the scale of the diaper as opposed to the size of the child, but on an adult, the question is now "does this diaper make my butt look fat" rather than "does these jeans make my butt look fat". Wearing tights / underwear and a dress over a diaper - then the diaper is impossible to be noticed.

Over time, you will gain confidence in the ability of a brand of diaper to suit your needs. This confidence will make you stronger.

Enjoy yourself, and accept the confidence that wearing diapers give you.

[NightWitch]

Update:

It’s been about 10 months of taking the medication that is causing my issues. About 7ish months of using some sort of protection (pull-ups or diapers) 24/7. I have attended a few events without diapers and was able to successfully keep myself dry (only because I had easy access to a bathroom). A family member commented on my constant bathroom use and I did mention being on a medication that was causing frequent urination. So idk I guess if they found out about the diapers it wouldn’t be that big of a surprise. I’m finding that I feel much more comfortable in a pull-up than in regular panties. It takes a lot of concentration to keep myself dry. I gathered up the courage to wear a megamax diaper last month to go holiday shopping. It was nerve wracking but nice to not worry about using the toilet at all while out and about. No nighttime issues (other than waking up to wet or try to use the bathroom a couple times a night) so far. Although, I still fantasize about training myself to become a bedwetter. I would say that I’m feeling pretty good about where I’m at now. Some days are still a struggle, but it is what it is.