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Baby Banker 2018
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MarkSmith last won the day on May 4

MarkSmith had the most liked content!

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About MarkSmith

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    Married Sissy In Diapers Permenently

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  1. It takes some time before you really do not care who is around. I still will not change my diaper around coworkers unless I have a private stall to change in.
  2. MarkSmith

    Need Advice from Straight Male ABDL

    You are quite welcome and I am extremely happy to help you in your current predicament. This is a case were it is honestly easier to share your feelings with complete strangers who do not know you and your partner. We can offer an unbiased and non judgmental view of the situation and provide our thoughts in an honest and constructive way. What is offered is simply advice based off of experience. Ultimately everything is up to you and your partner to decide what is best for your relationship. To answer your question there is no easy way to forget what he has done to you. Forgiveness can occur quickly but in the back of your mind you will remain fearful for some time to come. He needs to understand this. His actions will help to rid you of these fears. Loving you, being honest with you unconditionally, and respecting your feelings goes along way to helping you to forget. It took me some time to learn this. My wife would often check my phone and email accounts and I would become very defensive because of it at times. Eventually I realized what is there to be defensive about? That my wife does not trust me because I emotionally was unfaithful to her? Who's fault was that? The reality was I deserved to have my communications monitored for as long as it took her to forget. I had nothing to hide and absolutely no reason to be upset for her being reassured of that. The proof is in the pudding. Everytime you know he is being honest and forthright you take another step in your heart and soul forward. With time what happened will become a distant memory assuming he has learned from the grave mistake he made. It is very important he understands the true pain you feel over this. That opens his eyes to insure he never repeats his actions. If he loves you he too will feel your pain and he will learn from it. There is absolutely a logical reason for you to not trust him, he was unfaithful. How long it takes for you to get over that is his punishment for making hurting you so. That is how I learned and it certainly did work. Concerning his desires to masturbate in front of another male while diapered is he permitted to do this in front of you? I know it is a very personal question but maybe he just wants to be watched while he sexually pleasures himself in his diaper and told it is okay to do so. In my relationship that is about the only way I experience my sexual releases and for me not only is it intimate but it also reassures me that my wife accepts me being diapered. I need that. Just a thought and once again I hope I do not offend you by asking. A lot of this subject does delve into some tough questions and answers.
  3. MarkSmith

    Should I tell my girlfriend about my abdl side?

    It is scary living in the proverbial diaper closet. In my own marriage I told my wife about my diaper desires immediately after starting to see her. Even being honest with her from the beginning it still took years before she could truly accept her husband wearing diapers. Although I believe in honesty the right answer here is truthfully whatever works for you and your situation. Of course you have to live with the consequences of your decision. I wrote an article that may provide some advice on this subject... I hope everything works out for you and your partner.
  4. MarkSmith

    Need Advice from Straight Male ABDL

    As a married diaper lover myself from the outside looking in I understand both of your sides. Often times when you are on the inside it is hard for partners to see past themselves and their feelings particularly with the partner that has the diaper fetish. We can be very me, me, me, me. The desire to wear diapers can be very strong and controlling. After years of fighting it I finally gave in and started wearing them permanently. Although that was not what my wife preferred it has brought great balance to our relationship and honestly we are better today than we have ever been. We now have a very open and honest line of communication and listen to one another's concerns and fears. I wrote an article that may apply to some of your situation. Some parts do not pertain to your relationship so simply ignore those but other parts of the article may hit close to home and provide solid advice. Here is the link... I know what he did was so wrong through experience. When my wife despised everything about me wearing diapers I emotionally talked to another female about it. I cheated on her. At the time I believed that you had to physically engage in actions to cheat but seeing my wife in so much pain and misery when she caught me helped me to realize I was being emotionally unfaithful to her. She herself had a very real decision to make and not just with our realtionship. For us to stay together she knew she would have to accept me in diapers and that would be the challenge for her. The good thing is we are proof that a relationship can recover from these mistakes and actually turn out better in the long run. The foundation is honesty. Without that the realtionship is doomed to crack and fall apart. Communication is what strengthens the relationship and builds it up. Lastly, love can and will overcome everything...even bisexual tendacies and a man who thinks of himself as a little girl in the bedroom. I am glad you shared his masturbation history with me because this explains things a lot more and in my opinion should make you LESS concerned. When a male first learns to experience sexually pleasure it imprints on his mind. It should be no surprise my first orgasmic release as a young teenager was in a diaper and I have been addicted ever since. For your husband, his first sexual encounter was in the presence of the same sex. He was not judged or frowned upon by his friend for rubbing himself in a diaper. They both enjoyed their first time "feeling good" together so in some way I am sure that is where these desires come from. Him feeling this way he really has no control of as this is how his sexual being was unconsciously programmed. You seem to really understand and accept the reality of this situation. I hope for your husband's sake he understands this because woman of your magnitude do not simply grow on trees. You have had understanding for him and he needs to have the same for you. His change in attitude could be because he is confused. I know I got very aggressive and upset with my wife when I was alone wearing diapers. When you love someone more than anything who has difficulty accepting you or is confused by how you feel it puts you in a very scary place. I reacted to that by basically being a dick which helped no one. I am not the Frued of diaper fetish but I have experienced almost every aspect of this lifestyle. I have learned my desires and moved on from my mistakes but most importantly I have learned to accept the person who is looking back at me in the mirror. Please continue to share your thoughts and feelings here.
  5. MarkSmith

    Need Advice from Straight Male ABDL

    In my opinion the writing on the wall is that he has some bisexual desires. What is very unhealthy about this situation is that he was basically emotionally unfaithful to you which is completely unacceptable. Group masturbation around friends is not completely uncommon in a normal male heterosexual environment. I was in the military in close quarters with many men who often would openly masturbate in front of others. At no time did I believe they were bisexual they just simply had no manners while they were trying to get theirs. Another thought that is possible is that a gay male may entertain his diaper fetish more to his desires. As a very real diaper lover who lives this fetish every second, of every minute, of everyday of his life I have an idea of how I want to be treated as a little. If that idea is not met exactly how I see fit then I throw a temper tantrum. Most of the times a female partner has problems completely accepting and more importantly participating in their lover's diaper desires. This can cause a man to look for the gratification he seeks elsewhere either in the gay community or the professional sex community. I could make one post on an adult website and have a gay daddy tomorrow. He may just want someone, anyone to diaper him and treat him as a little. I know my wife has insecurities about my sexual orientation because I want to be her lil girl in pink diapers while she goes around and finds real men to sexual satisfy her. Despite wanting this and enjoying it so very much I could never find myself as a partner with a man. The thought of kissing a man is repulsive which is so weird because the thought of giving one of my wife's lovers oral sex or cleaning her up afterwards is something I desire the most. It is hard to explain human emotions and desires. We are all so different and that is what makes for such mystery. It really seems to me that he needs to learn how to be honest with both himself and his better half. Before I was honest with my wife I was caught up in countless lies about wearing diapers and it was very stressful for our relationship. When I finally did admit the truth she did hear thing she did not want to but it did establish an open line of communication and a better understanding for one another. Now the thought of not being honest with her is unimaginable. I hope everything works out for you two. You seem to be a very loving and accepting partner and your man needs to realize that as well by honoring you with his honestly. The truth will set you free.
  6. MarkSmith

    Getting Rid of Your Undies

    I went from a boxers drawer to sharing my wife's panty drawer and now to a drawer full of protective briefs and fixing panties. My boxers have long been removed. I am not exactly sure what my wife did with them. I know that she did not remove them to humiliate me, she simply needed more room for my protective panties.
  7. When you wear diapers often and in my case all the time it is inevitable that you will run across defective diapers from time to time. Most diapers are mass produced in China with very little quality assurance testing. The most common problem you will find is missing tapes. All I do is snap a few photos of the defective diapers and send the pictures to the place I bought then from along with the amount that are defective. Generally I always end up with extra diapers in the long run as company's usually will ship a pack for two or three defective diapers. Diapers cost way too much money to be defective. If you purchased them from a reputable source they definitely should be replaced as soon as possible.
  8. That is how it goes. With as much as I travel I am constantly changing my diaper in crowded airport public restrooms. Every airport is different as far as accommodating stalls and the privacy you are afforded from the size of the cracks in them. At this point I generally just let my diapers rip without a care but sometimes I do find myself a little bashful. I have only ever come across one other changing in a public restroom and you are right there is no doubt what is going on in your stall.
  9. MarkSmith

    Spouse Question

    I definately agree there are men that are too vanilla for diapers. My wife could never tell her lover that I wore diapers as he would have been completely freaked out. I do however personally believe that it is easier for most men to accept their partners in diapers than it is woman. My second wife would often dress as a schoolgirl in public often times even wearing a diaper under her skirt. All I can say is the guys and even some woman went absolutely crazy. I do not think I would get the same reaction walking around in my Disney Princess dress from woman, just saying.
  10. MarkSmith

    Spouse Question

    I think a lot of it also has to do with the fact that males are wired differently than females. First and foremost females are programmed by both nature and society to find the most attractive and strongest male to have offspring with. A man in diapers genarally does not fit this image and therefor is often times unattractive. If we reverse the scenario men usually find woman very attractive in a submissive role and does it get anymore submissive than your female partner wearing diapers and wanting you to be her Daddy? Also, woman have maternal instinct. Generally it is hard for a woman to accept both her baby and lover in diapers because of that. Her instincts tell her to protect her children. Most men just do not think like this. Lastly, a lot of woman feel they are replaced by diapers and have a hard time accepting their partner wearing them because of this. It is very emotional for them. I imagine that most men would not feel this way as we are so sexually charged all the time....you know, always thinking with the wrong heads. I guess what I am trying to say is that we put less emotions behind a diaper fetish and relate to it more sexually which is exciting for most men. Because of all this I agree with @mamabug that woman as littles are much more easy to accept simply in part because the sexes are so different.
  11. MarkSmith

    Undercover Sissy At Work

    Sissy day at work again...
  12. MarkSmith


    Thank you. I guess I will not make my wife happy lol.
  13. MarkSmith

    The draw to incontinence

    That is why I shared my desires. I have met people that like to wear diapers because they humiliate them but I have never really come across anyone that decided to unpotty train themselves so that they can experience fulltime humiliation. The draw evolves over time as well. After wearing diapers for a year and almost being completely diaper dependant I would say that I could never take my diapers of now because of the comfort and security they provide. Do not get me wrong I still need the humilation diapers provide for me but I have grown to love and need diapers for other reasons now too. For me NOT wearing diapers was the unhealthy balance in my life. My life, my relationships, my inner being are all significantly better now thanks to my draw to incontinence and there is no going back for this padded princess.
  14. MarkSmith

    The draw to incontinence

    Honestly for me my personal draw to both diapers and desiring to become incontinent has nothing to with babyhood or wanting to go back to a different time. The draw is simply all about my need to feel constantly humiliated. Diapers and not being able to control going pee pee in my pants satisfies my desires on a continually basis and serves as a reminder to my inner sissy I am less of a man. This stems from being abused as a child as humilation was used on me as a normal punishment and as a way to remind me I was lesser than everyone else. Why and how that turned into what I desire sexually as an adult only Frued can answer. Before wearing diapers permanently the constant need for humiliation had a negative impact on my life. It consumed my thoughts and desires. It is hard for everyday, normal life to provide a constant reminder of humilation and I felt lost and lonely without it. Diapers and more importantly lossing control of my bladder has quenched the desire of my never ending need to be humiliated. Everytime I move, everytime I walk, everytime I pull my pants down I am reminded I am less of a man. While in a meeting with my bosses or while laying next to my wife or while flying on an airplane or changing my diaper in a public restroom stall I always know and so do those around me sometimes. Diapers alone for me were not enough. Feeling my wee wee uncontrollably leak pee pee meant I would forever now have to wear a white badge of shame. Now I have no choice and have to wear diapers. Really the best part of all this is I can do all this all while being a successful father, husband, and professional. I can wear a pink princess diaper underneath my clothes and no one knows the difference accept the one who needs to know the most...me.
  15. MarkSmith

    Just Thinking Truly becoming an Adult Baby

    There is definatly a lot of learning and preparation that goes into making any kind of commitment fulltime. Wearing diapers permanently may be desired but actually making it reality is very challenging. There are so many things that you must overcome both physically and mentally that simply waking up one morning after a happy dream and declaring you are going to wear diapers the rest of your life you will almost assuredly not succeed. Some things were extremely difficult for me to overcome when I decided to wear diapers permanently. First and foremost understanding the inevitable binge and purge cycle that almost all of us experience and how to overcome the purge side of it. Once you have made a serious commitment to being diapered fulltime if you find your self in the middle of a purge cycle you literally have to force a diaper back on despite your mind telling you not to. The mind is a powerful thing and it can play tricks on you that make wearing diapers permanently very difficult. For me the hardest thing to overcome as a diaper lover was the post orgasm lack of desire to be diapered. As soon as my semen would leave my body I was ready to rip my diaper off until next time. When diapered permanently your diaper must stay on even after this. It took years for me to be able to do this. I cannot even really explain how I overcame it....it just happened one day. Life as you knew it before changes. That does not mean life is over and you adjust to your new diapered life. Eventually you barely even know you have a diaper on and the feel of not being in one even when in the shower or drying off makes you hurry back to your padded protection. You will become mentally dependent on diapers way before you have a physical dependancy or need for them. This can happen for you. You just need to learn all the ins and outs, ups and downs, and all around before it can really become an obtainable goal. Before I started wearing permanently and shared my desires here many members on this forum took the time to help me reach my goal. I often times read things that I did not agree with or felt did not depict my desires but many times what was said was exactly what happened. Listen constructively to the advice given here as you just will not find better wisdom backed by both diapered experience and expertise.