Tommybubbles, his family and friends

[Abi]

Tommybubbles was my friends.

No, that's not a typo. He was definitely my friends, plural.

Tommybubbles was not the man we were told he was. He did not suffer a traumatic brain injury 7 years before he joined the site. But he did suffer from periodic bouts of depression and self-harming for most of his life. And he died of an overdose on 26 December 2024. Whether that overdose was accidental or deliberate will probably never be known.

Nearly everything we learned about Tommy in the 2 years he was a member of the site was pure fantasy. Invention. The family and friends who surrounded him were pure invention. But what invention! ALL of his friends and family who joined the site were pure invention ... they were Tommy, posting from  multiple devices. So they have all died with him. Who were they all? I am not sure if I have the full list, but those I know for certain were:

Jackie1 (Jackie)

TOMC1 (Tom)

HAPPY (George)

Goat (Matt)

Mouse (Jonathon)

RIZZO (Sam)

Freak (Gladys)

Hat (Bev)

Ladybird (Rach)

Oscar (Oscar)

DANCING ALPACA (Hannah)

Superted (Teddy)

Dragonman (Phillip)

Katie (Katie - whom we banned for being underage ... but it seems we were wrong about that)

I interacted online with all of them ... and had no idea that they were just invented characters in Tommy's fantasy world. Other characters in his fantasy world, of whose reality I was equally convinced, included (in no particular order) Beth, Jill, two more Katies, another Hannah, Bill, Sid, Mark the son of Gladys, Mark the solicitor, Ted the retired driving instructor, Alice the old lady who died of cancer, Marie, Jim, Sue, Ryan, Simon, Graham, Patrick, Eve, Charlotte, "the Krays" (Jack and Henry), Willow, Lily, Harper, Nat, Ivy, the triplets (Arthur, Holly and Oscar), Leo, April, Bob, Cailtin (Tommy's daughter), Rick, "Shark" and Susan ... and a whole host of minor characters.

Tommy arrived on the DD scene at a low point in my life. The loss of an eye was bringing my teaching career to an end and before long I was signed off work with stress and depression. My sick leave lasted for 6 months, and culminated with my taking early retirement. For most of this time I wasn't able to do much except lie alone on my bed, interacting with online friends through the medium of the internet. It was mostly Tommy's invented characters that I interacted with, and they gave me hope and purpose in life. Advising them, helping them through their problems, and mentoring 13 year old "Beth" who aspired to be a barrister in legal thinking and skills. It would be easy to say it was all a hollow sham because none of them existed and their problems were not real. But that would not be a fair reflection. They gave me hope and purpose and something to get up for in the morning. For that I shall always be grateful, and I shall never forget them.

Tommy's characters were also all about cars ... especially classic cars, about which they were very knowledgeable. It had been a lifelong ambition of mine to own a classic car ... an ambition that I never thought I should realise because I lacked the necessary skills and knowledge. Tommy's characters persuaded me to believe in myself ... and to go out and realise my ambition, so that now I own two classic cars. One of them is even named Marie, in honour of a person who never existed ... "Jill's mum" who had MS, and died at the beginning of December. Only she didn't, because she never existed.

So what should we make of Tommy, a larger-then-life character who broke all the rules and filled the site with his alter egos? He was clearly a tortured soul, finding his outlet in fantasy, and I was drawn into his fantasy world in a way that some would say was utterly unhealthy. And yet ... it gave me hope and purpose in life at a time when all seemed lost. Will I miss him, and them? You bet I will! Am I grieving for him, and them? Unquestionably! Am I grateful that he came into my life, when he did, in the way that he did? Absolutely!

So goodbye Tommy. I shall miss you, and your creations, more than words can ever express.

Thank you for the memories.

Thank you, my friends!

[Wes17]

I will also miss Tommy and his family deeply as he/they helped me through a very tough time in my life.

I hope he finds peace and rest 

Rip my friend 

[snobak]

😢😢😢 he/they will be missed I had no idea he was suffering like this.

 

 

 

[jesse78]

Tommy will be dearly missed, he touched many of us in special ways. RIP💗

[LilFozzyJ5]

I am...stunned

 

[DL-Ash]

😭🐶 Tommy will be missed by me.

[gobphus]

Thanks, Abi, for this touching remembrance of Tommybubbles and the characters he created. How sad that he ended his life, whether accidentally or deliberately. I think you will miss him most of all. It's good that his legacy is the hlep that he provided you and others in getting through difficult times.

My favorite of his characters was Ladybird, one of his most recent ones. Here’s some of what he said as her:

 

“I[’m] rach, i have a 13 year old daughter, single, bored, own a bakery, wear pull ups to wind down and like short pink dresses.”

On the bakery: “I bought it with my mother and brother…A few months ago, transformed it but then got a silent partner to buy my brother who had over stretched himself and my mother who was controlling everyone and my staff walked because of it.”

“I actually miss being a bedwetter.”

I've been naughty today…I was serving a very gorgeous guy and I found myself grinding my wet pullup slightly against the counter…As he left I lost control, luckily the shop was empty lol…Not the first time I've done it too…Did a double Cumming.”

 

I wonder whether anyone else heard these particular tales from “Ladybird”.

[Abi]

The tales I heard from Rach (Ladybird) were very different. She may only have been a recent innovation so far as membership of DD was concerned ... but she has been central to the story pretty much from the outset.

Her 13 year old daughter was Beth ... who was 11 at the time Tommy et al arrived. She was known to Jackie1, who was her hairdresser. Beth was parked with her grandmother Sue and uncles Matt (Goat) and Ryan when her mum went off for a job in Germany. Only ... she wasn't going for a job ... she was going to an expensive German rehab clinic to sort out her mental health issues. She just didn't want Beth knowing about that.

Beth's angst at seemingly being abandoned by her mother was a long-running theme, until eventually Rach came back from Germany and moved in with her mother. Rach couldn't stand being with her mother for very long as she called her "overbearing" and blamed her for her mental health issues. So she moved out with Beth to a rental house owned by Tommy ... and that was the point at which she joined the site.

I heard lots of stories of the bakery from her ... but not about winding down in pull-ups (although she did sometimes say she was wearing one to bed when she'd had a lot to drink ... and occasionally came on very embarrassed in the morning to admit that it had been wet when she woke up) or short pink dresses.

[Babygeebee]

I am completely shocked. He was always fun to chat with. I had no idea he was suffer so or the extent of his extended family. They were his friends and family and that's how I will remember them. Hail and farewell Tommy. 

[~Brian~]

8 hours ago, LilFozzyJ5 said:

I am...stunned

 

Me also! I cannot believe what I am reading and maybe it’s just because it just doesn’t seem to have head home yet! I know there are people who may play multiple roles, or they might have split personality or something where you have several personalities that are involved in one person or two people. All I know is the Tommy that I knew, and all of his “friends“ were supportive of him all the way down the pike, and unfortunately, I have been out of action for approximately 2 1/2 to 3 weeks as I dealt with my own issues and my own problems. This will not be the place where I discussed that but I will do something to let you all know what happened to me during the last couple of months.  Just like @LilFozzyJ5 I am stunned, and I don’t exactly know how to process this other than to say that I do understand that there are people that can suffer from multiple personality disorder.

I also would like to state that I wish only the best for Mr. bubbles. May he rest in peace, regardless of where he came from and how he got here. I guess there are people who deal with this type of thing, all the time, and depression can hit any of us even I have dealt with depression this Christmas time. And I can tell you that it was a pain in the neck, and I’m still dealing with the aftermath of some of the things that happened to me.

May Tommy bubbles and the rest of his entourage that he created in fantasy always rest in peace and love, knowing that each of us might have had some sort of interaction with each of his “characters“ but as I said, I’m still stunned, I’m sorry to hear that he passed away, and I know that it can be hard for people that deal with that situation that he dealt with.

thank you @Abi for letting us know of the situation! As I said, each of us had our interactions with Tommy bubbles, and the rest of his crew, and each of us will have unique memories of each person that we interacted with as part of his communications.

RIP @TommyBubbles you will be remembered always, but you always will be missed!

Brian

 

[SpiderBaby]

Wait Tommy's dead?!

I'm just absolutely stunned! I'm at a lost for words. Tommy was one of my best friends! I mean I always knew he had issues but I never thought that all of his friends were literally just his imagination. This is absolutely sad!😭 I had no idea he was struggling with so much. I wish I could have been there for him more. I'm just in shock and I need time to process this. If you reading this Tommy, I love you and you're one of my best friends! May you rest in heaven and finally be the baby you've ALWAYS wanted to be!

[LilRugrat]

No. No no no no no no no no no no no no

[olympus]

Wow! I did not know that all those "people" were a creation of his imagination. Stunned that he is gone! RIP Tommy!!!

 

[Dee Cee]

I heard this , somewhere…”some people , ya just can’t reach” ….

[DiaperboyEddie12]

wow I am speechless!  he was a good friend.  And I had suspected that all those people who you mention @Abi that it was really Tommy as whenever he was not here they were and then one would dispear and another one would come about.  But I am sad the real pers.

this really breaks my heart!

[froggy]

I will miss tommy bubbles.  But wow on the alter egos.

froggy

 

[Abi]

4 hours ago, Dee Cee said:

I heard this , somewhere…”some people , ya just can’t reach” ….

Try the musical "Carousel" ... Bascombe the ship owner to Timony the policeman.

I think it may have been "ya just can't help" rather than "just can't reach" ... but either way, it's totally apposite, isn't it?

[tommyneedsdiapers90]

Absolutely breaks my heart 

[Dee Cee]

No , it came back to me ….. I was from “cool hand luke” , the the part where Luke had escaped , for the second or third time , and when they finally tracked him down , he was beat , and run to a frazzle, and that little guy , the warden sez , is lookin down on and he sez , a little , speech and I ain’t going to repeat the whole thing , but it begins “some people ya just cian’t , reach “, and in the movie its longer , but that part I do remember ! Watch it and see !  But thanks for , reaching out , sorry about your , loss .