I told my doctor about incontinent desires, diapers, and I asked her for help to get surgery.

[Ferix]

Monday, I had my first appointment with my new doctor. This was an appointment I made specifically with her about my mental health and "urine retention".

 

The appointment was on a video call so we got to see each other. It started out as normally as it could be for a video appointment: we greeted each other and I thanked her for taking the time to talk to me. She verified who I was then double checked my meds, history, and allergies.

 

She asked me if I was there to talk about my mental health and urine retention, to which I said yes. She followed that by asking, "what's going on with your mental health, has something happened?"

 

"Not exactly" I replied. "I need help. You see, this issue I have has been going on all my life. For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be incontinent. I really mean, I am currently continent and I do not want to have control."

 

"These desires to be incontinent are constant and never go away. With time they have only gotten stronger and almost impossible to ignore. To cope with these desires, I wear and use diapers. Wearing diapers has given me some relief to these desires but they never address the core of my problem: I feel like I need to be incontinent."

 

"For all my life, I have turned to diapers to help me cope with my incontinent desires. There probably hasn't been a month in my life where I haven't had access to and used diapers. The older I got, the stronger the desires got and the more I wore diapers."

 

"However, what I was doing was not enough. The call to these desires are so strong, it has driven me to use catheters and stents to achieve temporary incontinence. I know it's highly risky to use catheters and stents, I've actually gotten UTIs from them before and had to get antibiotics from my previous doctor. I never told my previous doctor about the truth of what happened because at the time, I did not believe that it was possible to get help for what I was going through. I was also worried he might take it the wrong way and I wanted to avoid a negative reaction."

 

"I get that using cathers and stents to feel incontinent is extreme; What keeps driving me to use them is because they have allowed me to feel something I have never felt before: to feel like my true self."

 

"In addition to using catheters and stents, I have taken measures to try to untrain my continence. For the last 4 years, I have lived as though I were incontinent and have been wearing diapers full time. To try to lose control, I have spent a lot of time practicing reverse kegals, keeping my pelvic floor muscles relaxed, and never denying an urge. Even with all of this practice, I still feel like I have control and any control I have lost could easily be regained with training."

 

"These desires and diapers have not been bad, in fact, they've brought me a lot of good. Because of diapers, I met my husband, I have a great circle of friends who support me, and I started a business selling cloth diapers that I craft."

 

"Because of my long time involvement in the community and because of my business, I have come into contact with others who have the same desires as me. I have talked to a few people have discussed this problem with their urologist and we're able to get their help. They asked if they could get surgery to become incontinent."

 

"One told me that their urologist was understanding and they were willing to help. They said their urologist was open to a surgical option but they wanted to try physical therapy and meds to try to lose control first. If those measures didn't work, then they would do the surgery. They also spoke with a mental health professional to get an endorsement from them to establish they were mentally sound to get surgery to become incontinent."

 

"They said they did all those things and when that didn't work, they're urologist gave them the surgery they wanted and made them permanently incontinent."

 

"That's what I'm here today for: I need help coping with these desires and I'm done putting myself at risk by using catheters and stents. I'm looking for a permanent solution to my desires and I want to get surgery to become incontinent. I know it's been possible for others to get surgery to become incontinent, one of them was able to get this done in the next state over."

 

"I'm hoping that you can help me by referring me to a urologist that would be open to listening to my problems and helping as well as talking to anyone else, such as a psychiatrist, to establish that I'm mentally sound and clear to get surgery."

 

The whole time My doctor was quiet. She seemed very attentive to what I was saying and then when I was all done she said, "It really sounds like you thought this through and I believe you. I'm not sure if we can convince a urologist to help, especially since surgery would result in a permanent change to remove something that works normal. But if you explain the situation like you did to me, there may be a chance that they'd be willing to help."

 

She continued, "What I can do is refer you to a urologist and a psychiatrist. You can explain to the urologists that you're also seeking help from a psychiatrist and looking to get their endorsement for the surgery so hopefully that can help convince them to be more willing to go with a surgical option."

 

My first thought, " holy crap, that went way better than I thought it would go." I thanked her a ton and that was basically the end of the conversation.

 

Now, my next appointment is Friday, March 5th with a urologist. I'll let you know how that goes.

[BrownBobby]

This is VERY good to hear, and I'm glad it went well!  It's amazing how scary it is before and during, and how...normal...things are after.  Hopefully this is the first step in achieving your goal!

[scaredabdl]

I am truly glad you that a doc listened and was willing to support you. I look forward to hearing about your follow up.

[horrorfan]

I'd give it a second thought before having that surgery. It's a lot harder to put something in than to take it out. 

[dlnoir]

Hi Ferix,

I’ve been reading your story and in all honesty it could have been something I wrote myself. I hope it will work out for you, and I hope your doctor and your urologist will help you to see it through all the way. On a personal level I share your desire completely if I could have it my way I would do the same. I have been using stents for years in a row, unlike you and so far I never had any UTI`s. I’ve been using stents since ’06 and since ’13 almost 24/7 so if it was just temporary thing it would have been gone by now. Like you said over time the feeling of wanting to be incontinent grew. I feel complete when wearing a diaper and being urinary incontinent. I do not feel like an AB at all, I do not feel like a DL although it is closest thing I do have to admit. I feel complete and happy when diapered and having no control.

I can understand why some members here on DD warn us to not proceed with our desires. But I think they have no idea what so ever how strong these desires can be and how much strain they inflict on those who do have that desire. Reading your story I do feel you have been thinking about it all the way through so best of luck to you and please share your story.

[Little Sherri]

Interesting, @Ferix - let us know how it goes. Good luck!

[Cute_Kitten]

What a great doctor, I hope the urologist is just as open and understanding!  Best of luck in your endeavors, wishing it all goes well for you.  You've put a lot of thought and effort into this, and it's something you truly desire/ need, you sound very committed to this path and I hope the urologist and other doctors can see that and will help you. 

[yanairiki@gmail.com]

does anyone have reccomendation I'm also trying to find a doctor to talk to and get an operation

[horrorfan]

10 hours ago, dlnoir said:

I can understand why some members here on DD warn us to not proceed with our desires. But I think they have no idea what so ever how strong these desires can be and how much strain they inflict on those who do have that desire. Reading your story I do feel you have been thinking about it all the way through so best of luck to you and please share your story.

I actually do understand. Since I was five I have wanted to wear diapers to the point of giving in, allowing myself to be ruled by my own cognitive distortion, and pushing other people and logic/reason away. However, I also try to understand other perspectives and I read about cases which involve our type of lifestyle, which cases definitely lead into very gray areas concerning law and ethics. I don't wish to really get into it here, but I think it would be very wise to seriously weigh the pros and cons before proceeding. The way I actually see it, we all eventually grow old, lose bodily functions, and end up in nursing homes, while wearing diapers anyway. To that end, in the here and now, that is something to look forward to.

That's my two cents anyway. whatever you decide, good luck and I hope it works out for you.

[Ferix]

11 hours ago, horrorfan said:

I actually do understand. Since I was five I have wanted to wear diapers to the point of giving in, allowing myself to be ruled by my own cognitive distortion, and pushing other people and logic/reason away. However, I also try to understand other perspectives and I read about cases which involve our type of lifestyle, which cases definitely lead into very gray areas concerning law and ethics. I don't wish to really get into it here, but I think it would be very wise to seriously weigh the pros and cons before proceeding. The way I actually see it, we all eventually grow old, lose bodily functions, and end up in nursing homes, while wearing diapers anyway. To that end, in the here and now, that is something to look forward to.

That's my two cents anyway. whatever you decide, good luck and I hope it works out for you.

"I have wanted to wear diapers to the point of giving in, allowing myself to be ruled by my own cognitive distortion, and pushing other people and logic/reason away." Sounds like you don't understand and honestly comes off a bit rude and insensitive. Feel free not to project yourself onto others and please be respectful to those who have different experiences than you.

 

It's odd that you'd come on to an incontinence desire forum to dissuade me from incontinence surgery.  It's like going into a transgender forum and telling people not to get sex change surgery because it's hard to be undone.

 

One thing about my conversation with my doctor that I didn't mention: at the end of the call we had a bit of back and forth where I mentioned that I believe I have a form of BIID: body identity integrity disorder. This creates feelings similar to those cause by gender dysphoria.

 

My doctor seemed to really care and understand what was going on. She knew I was serious about what I wanted so I'm really happy she set me up the best way she could by referring me to a psychiatrist and a urologist to help me make this happen.

 

I'm glad I have the help of my doctor who believes me. I didn't think it would ever be possible to have the support of a doctor, let alone my primary doctor.

 

Thanks to everyone who is supporting me, it's really amazing that this could actually happen and I'll be sure to keep you all updated!

[ValentinesStuff]

I understand where you are coming from. I wish you the best of luck. Hopefully something other than surgery can give you what you want. I only say this because any surgery is dangerous. If surgery is the only option, I wish you the best of skill in having it done. relying on luck in surgery is a bad thing. Be honest with your doctor's is the best advice I can give you.

[Autiesaurus]

That's amazing OP, I wish I had the courage to talk to my doctor so openly, I too have dreams of being bladder IC and would love surgery to achieve it, alas I doubt it will be in the cards for me. Do keep us updated on your progress!

[dlnoir]

2 hours ago, Ferix said:

I have wanted to wear diapers to the point of giving in, allowing myself to be ruled by my own cognitive distortion, and pushing other people and logic/reason away." Sounds like you don't understand and honestly comes off a bit rude and insensitive. Feel free not to project yourself onto others and please be respectful to those who have different experiences than you.

 

It's odd that you'd come on to an incontinence desire forum to dissuade me from incontinence surgery.  It's like going into a transgender forum and telling people not to get sex change surgery because it's hard to be undone.

 

One thing about my conversation with my doctor that I didn't mention: at the end of the call we had a bit of back and forth where I mentioned that I believe I have a form of BIID: body identity integrity disorder. This creates feelings similar to those cause by gender dysphoria.

 

My doctor seemed to really care and understand what was going on. She knew I was serious about what I wanted so I'm really happy she set me up the best way she could by referring me to a psychiatrist and a urologist to help me make this happen.

 

I'm glad I have the help of my doctor who believes me. I didn't think it would ever be possible to have the support of a doctor, let alone my primary doctor.

 

Thanks to everyone who is supporting me, it's really amazing that this could actually happen and I'll be sure to keep you all updated!

This exactly well said.

[oznl]

@Ferix I'm dead impressed with how you have tackled this: head on.  No ducking, no weaving, no BS, you just dealt with it.  I love it.  Whether your ultimately obtain your original objective or not, I think you are going to learn some interesting stuff about yourself along the way and hopefully, there might be some insights to be gleaned for the rest of us.

In your circumstance, I'd like to imagine I'd find the intestinal fortitude to take a similar path.  Although 24/7 for a couple of years, I have not.  Partly because it's not 100% clear to me if I'm really seeking incontinence (although clearly I am toying with it) and partly because for me, stuff seems to be happening a bit in that regard just through new learned behaviors.

Like most other folk, I'm intensely interested to see how this pans out for you.

[BaronBrook]

Hey, fellow person working with a urologist & psychiatrist here. Counting you, that makes five of us across reddit, db, and a few other sites so far!

Here's a few things from my experience. I'm only about a month or two ahead of where you're at now.

1. Urine retention means not being able to operate your bladder muscles. The urologist may understand you better if you bring up distressingly low bladder frequency. 

2. Your doc will probably order a blood draw and an ultrasound, to rule out things like cancer.

3. Your doc will probably take a slow approach, and have you try things like anticholinergics, bladder training, physical therapy with biofeedback, and others. Trying to slowly dial in an acceptable level of bladder control.

4. My psychiatrist has said that very few docs might authorize surgery or injections more quickly if you sign a release, acknowledging that these other steps are unlikely to help. That's a judgement call & might spook a urologist. 

5. My psychiatrist recommended Abilify, to help slow down and sort through emotions while navigating this change. Think you might end up on anything?

6. The BIID angle makes sense! We've been working on this from a DDNoS or cPTSD angle. Diapers & incontinence as solutions to dissociative problems. 

Congratulations on your journey, I hope it goes great & brings you fulfillment!

[Ferix]

On 3/1/2021 at 10:30 AM, BaronBrook said:

Hey, fellow person working with a urologist & psychiatrist here. Counting you, that makes five of us across reddit, db, and a few other sites so far!

Here's a few things from my experience. I'm only about a month or two ahead of where you're at now.

1. Urine retention means not being able to operate your bladder muscles. The urologist may understand you better if you bring up distressingly low bladder frequency. 

2. Your doc will probably order a blood draw and an ultrasound, to rule out things like cancer.

3. Your doc will probably take a slow approach, and have you try things like anticholinergics, bladder training, physical therapy with biofeedback, and others. Trying to slowly dial in an acceptable level of bladder control.

4. My psychiatrist has said that very few docs might authorize surgery or injections more quickly if you sign a release, acknowledging that these other steps are unlikely to help. That's a judgement call & might spook a urologist. 

5. My psychiatrist recommended Abilify, to help slow down and sort through emotions while navigating this change. Think you might end up on anything?

6. The BIID angle makes sense! We've been working on this from a DDNoS or cPTSD angle. Diapers & incontinence as solutions to dissociative problems. 

Congratulations on your journey, I hope it goes great & brings you fulfillment!

Thanks for the insight and I hope the best for your journey!

 

I did end up taking your advice today when I needed to answer some questions on an online form for my upcoming urologist visit. I had to answer why I wanted to be seen: I said, "I experience discomfort with a full bladder and the frequency in which I urinate is distressing." I'll let them know about everything else when I have the visit Friday.

 

I'm doing things a bit out of order to what you are doing. I first saw my primary care doctor about incontinence desires last week. This Friday I'm seeing a urologist. I wont have my first visit with a psychiatrist until March 30th. I have never been to a psychiatrist before so I really don't know what to expect or if they will suggest any medication.

 

I anticipate that if I do get a urologist to help, that they would try other methods to reduce my continence, such as medications targeting muscles that control urination to physical therapy, before they opt for surgery. I'll try anything but I wont be satisfied if the results are anything less than permanent incontinence.

 

If there really is a way for a urologist to help me without surgery and achieve incontinence, then I would be happy with that. I just don't see that happening; if something like becoming incontinent without surgery existed, we'd be talking all about that on these forums and I'm sure there'd be more than 5 of us pursuing it right now.

 

 

[Diaperman95]

On 2/25/2021 at 3:49 PM, Ferix said:

Monday, I had my first appointment with my new doctor. This was an appointment I made specifically with her about my mental health and "urine retention".

 

The appointment was on a video call so we got to see each other. It started out as normally as it could be for a video appointment: we greeted each other and I thanked her for taking the time to talk to me. She verified who I was then double checked my meds, history, and allergies.

 

She asked me if I was there to talk about my mental health and urine retention, to which I said yes. She followed that by asking, "what's going on with your mental health, has something happened?"

 

"Not exactly" I replied. "I need help. You see, this issue I have has been going on all my life. For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be incontinent. I really mean, I am currently continent and I do not want to have control."

 

"These desires to be incontinent are constant and never go away. With time they have only gotten stronger and almost impossible to ignore. To cope with these desires, I wear and use diapers. Wearing diapers has given me some relief to these desires but they never address the core of my problem: I feel like I need to be incontinent."

 

"For all my life, I have turned to diapers to help me cope with my incontinent desires. There probably hasn't been a month in my life where I haven't had access to and used diapers. The older I got, the stronger the desires got and the more I wore diapers."

 

"However, what I was doing was not enough. The call to these desires are so strong, it has driven me to use catheters and stents to achieve temporary incontinence. I know it's highly risky to use catheters and stents, I've actually gotten UTIs from them before and had to get antibiotics from my previous doctor. I never told my previous doctor about the truth of what happened because at the time, I did not believe that it was possible to get help for what I was going through. I was also worried he might take it the wrong way and I wanted to avoid a negative reaction."

 

"I get that using cathers and stents to feel incontinent is extreme; What keeps driving me to use them is because they have allowed me to feel something I have never felt before: to feel like my true self."

 

"In addition to using catheters and stents, I have taken measures to try to untrain my continence. For the last 4 years, I have lived as though I were incontinent and have been wearing diapers full time. To try to lose control, I have spent a lot of time practicing reverse kegals, keeping my pelvic floor muscles relaxed, and never denying an urge. Even with all of this practice, I still feel like I have control and any control I have lost could easily be regained with training."

 

"These desires and diapers have not been bad, in fact, they've brought me a lot of good. Because of diapers, I met my husband, I have a great circle of friends who support me, and I started a business selling cloth diapers that I craft."

 

"Because of my long time involvement in the community and because of my business, I have come into contact with others who have the same desires as me. I have talked to a few people have discussed this problem with their urologist and we're able to get their help. They asked if they could get surgery to become incontinent."

 

"One told me that their urologist was understanding and they were willing to help. They said their urologist was open to a surgical option but they wanted to try physical therapy and meds to try to lose control first. If those measures didn't work, then they would do the surgery. They also spoke with a mental health professional to get an endorsement from them to establish they were mentally sound to get surgery to become incontinent."

 

"They said they did all those things and when that didn't work, they're urologist gave them the surgery they wanted and made them permanently incontinent."

 

"That's what I'm here today for: I need help coping with these desires and I'm done putting myself at risk by using catheters and stents. I'm looking for a permanent solution to my desires and I want to get surgery to become incontinent. I know it's been possible for others to get surgery to become incontinent, one of them was able to get this done in the next state over."

 

"I'm hoping that you can help me by referring me to a urologist that would be open to listening to my problems and helping as well as talking to anyone else, such as a psychiatrist, to establish that I'm mentally sound and clear to get surgery."

 

The whole time My doctor was quiet. She seemed very attentive to what I was saying and then when I was all done she said, "It really sounds like you thought this through and I believe you. I'm not sure if we can convince a urologist to help, especially since surgery would result in a permanent change to remove something that works normal. But if you explain the situation like you did to me, there may be a chance that they'd be willing to help."

 

She continued, "What I can do is refer you to a urologist and a psychiatrist. You can explain to the urologists that you're also seeking help from a psychiatrist and looking to get their endorsement for the surgery so hopefully that can help convince them to be more willing to go with a surgical option."

 

My first thought, " holy crap, that went way better than I thought it would go." I thanked her a ton and that was basically the end of the conversation.

 

Now, my next appointment is Friday, March 5th with a urologist. I'll let you know how that goes.

You do what makes you happy ot sounds like you have thought it out but from someone who has no choice I would kill to be in control. Just make sure you never do it to your bottom. I am bladder incontinent most my life but just starting to go through the fecal IC in the last year or so and my god I wouldn't wish ot on anyone. So far this week alone I have shit my self about 7 times.   

[Ferix]

Whelp, I had a surprise phone call from my urologist today. He said he had some free time so we went ahead and did the appointment today.

 

I told him everything: I told him about my incontinent desires, life long diaper wearing, my incontinence training, my business selling cloth diapers, and that there are others like me who have gotten help from their urologists. I told him I believe that what I have is a form of BIID and that I experience dysphoria similar to transgender dysphoria.

 

He was an attentive listener and really wanted to understand what I was going through. He said he's been a urologist for 17 years and that he's never had a case like mine. He was also reassuring and said that he wanted to help!

 

He said that he wanted to make sure we go through the proper channels and have a consensus of multiple doctors before we consider surgery as the proper treatment. He said that the type of surgery I was wanting was not something he had done since med-school and said that he was willing to refer me to a university where they have experience in sphincterotomies.

One of my concerns was if going to the university would be covered by insurance. He said that with his referral, it would deem it medically necessary and that the insurance would pay.

 

Before we do that though, he wants to collect all the "low hanging fruit". He first wanted to know if I had any pre-existing urinary problems; He asked if I had any problems that might cause issues, like spinal bifida or sciatica, which I said no. He says he wants to run a couple tests: an x-ray to look at my spine and to do a procedure to look inside the lower urinary tract to see if there's any deformity or scarring. 

 

He seemed pretty eager to help as he was fascinated about incontinence desires. He said he was going to look up what he can about it after our phone call and do his own research.

 

I did mention to him that I'm open to other options other than surgery, but I really am there for permanent incontinence and hope that we can work together to achieve that goal, surgery or not.

 

The next step is to get my x-ray and I'll have an in person visit with the urologist April 1st to see inside the bladder and to discuss more about the path I need to take to become incontinent.

 

So, I mean, awesome! Looks like the gears are getting into place for this to really happen!

 

 

29 minutes ago, Diaperman95 said:

You do what makes you happy ot sounds like you have thought it out but from someone who has no choice I would kill to be in control. Just make sure you never do it to your bottom. I am bladder incontinent most my life but just starting to go through the fecal IC in the last year or so and my god I wouldn't wish ot on anyone. So far this week alone I have shit my self about 7 times.   

If I could swap continence with you I would! I can only imagine how being incontinent, when you don't want to be, can be the worst. 

I actually want bowel IC too. I have been living as though I am incontinent for the last 4 years. In that time I have never used the toilet, except a couple times when the urge to poo happened in the shower; I just hopped out and took couple steps to the toilet.

 

In my experience, I have found that managing bowel IC is doable. If I anticipate that I will need to mess before I go out for the day, I may take a suppository to encourage a bowel movement before I leave so I wont have one later. That. so far has always worked for me.

[toddwr250r]

Anxiously awaiting an up date, I hope all went well.

[Ferix]

1 hour ago, toddwr250r said:

Anxiously awaiting an up date, I hope all went well.

If you're wondering about my urology visit, that actually happened yesterday by surprise. You can read that above.

 

In short, everything went really well! Both my urologist and my doctor are willing to help. My next step is to get an x-ray on my lower spine to see if there's anything going on that may cause urinary problems. I'm waiting on the referral to go through before I can schedule that but I'll schedule that as soon as the referral appears.

 

After that I will have a video appointment with a psychiatrist on the 30th of this month to talk about what's going on. This will be my first visit with a psychiatrist about the issue.

 

Then on April 1st, I have my next appointment with my urologist where we will meet in person. He's going look inside the lower urinary tract with a camera to check for any signs of injuries or anatomical deformities that may cause problems. He believes that since I don't seem to have any issues with my continence, he won't find anything. Once the procedure's done we'll talk about the path moving forward on how to treat me and work towards incontinence.

 

My urologist seemed very eager to help. He was saying things like "in 17 years I've never had a case like this" and "learn something new everyday" and "It's fascinating, most people want me to bring back their control when they lose it, not take it away" and "I'm very open minded and I don't judge". It's a huge relief that I have such an open-minded urologist: Before the call, I was concerned I would have to talk to multiple urologists until I find one that was willing to help.

 

Everything just seems to be moving surprisingly smoothly. Hopefully things continue to move that way. I'm still very early in this journey so I expect that there's a lot of opportunity for me to hit a roadblock or speed bumps along the way. Whatever happens, I'll keep you guys updated!

[Diapered Dave]

I find this topic very interesting and I'm surprised that the urologist seems like he might help you become incontinent. You always hear about the oath they take of "Do no harm"..... Imagine if someday this is treated the same way as transgendered people are when they want surgery. I wonder how many people we'd have happily becoming diaper-dependent!! I'm already a bedwetter, with an increasingly progressing issue with urge incontinence, so I'd probably sign up to have the surgery myself...

[dlnoir]

6 hours ago, Diapered Dave said:

I find this topic very interesting and I'm surprised that the urologist seems like he might help you become incontinent. You always hear about the oath they take of "Do no harm"..... Imagine if someday this is treated the same way as transgendered people are when they want surgery. I wonder how many people we'd have happily becoming diaper-dependent!! I'm already a bedwetter, with an increasingly progressing issue with urge incontinence, so I'd probably sign up to have the surgery myself...

 

Just like you I find this topic very interesting as I share the same feelings as Ferix for the most part that is. I only have a strong desire to be urinary incontinent and no bowel incontinence what so ever, but in the light of this conversation that is just a detail. It is true a urologist like every doctor will make an oath to cause no harm. Fortunately (for us) that is not just limited to one’s physical health but mental health as well, that is why they involve psychiatrists in order to determine if this is best for the patient. I am sure you know that. Luckily for Ferix his personal physician and his urologist were willing to listen with an open mind and they got the wheels in motion.  I think there is still a long way to go before they make a final decision on the request. I can understand the urologist never had a request like this before and there is a good change after the request Ferix gave him he’ll never get a second request like it…………….. unless.

In a way I think to process to determine what is right will not be whole lot different from a request given by a transgender to help them to find whatever they need or desire. I am very happy to see that health care is more and more aware of these people whom carry this burden, for a burden it can be, I think. Within the Netherlands there are an estimated 200.000 people with transgender feelings and a smaller number will actually see it through to get surgery and whatever else is needed.

Now I have no idea how many AB`s and DL`s there are (worldwide) but one can only expect that there is even a smaller number of AB/DL`s who go around with a strong desire to be actually incontinent. I have seen a couple of psychiatrist over the years when I was struggling with myself and most of them if not all never heard of AB/DL`s, their live style or desires. It could be that even the psychiatrist has to do some research to get a feeling with the AB/DL life style and what is can be like. Like I said, it is a good thing that health care at least became more aware of trans genders and their feelings and struggles. Hopefully the psychiatrist Ferix will be referred to will do some good research if he or she is unaware of AB/DL to make the right decision for Ferix. And I hope he or she will see and become equally aware that the desire we have can weigh heavy on our shoulders as well.

 

[Diapered Dave]

If this became more requested in the medical field, I could imagine that the doctors might come up with something like a medically implanted long term stent, that could be left in for like a year or so. Then they could tell the patient "Ok, we want to be SURE this is right for you, so now you are incontinent beyond your control, and we'll see in a year if you still want this permanently.." That way, the patient could experience the desired incontinence, make sure they didn't change their mind about it, and the doctor wouldn't worry about a patient coming back later, with regrets. I'd sign up for a deal like that myself.

[BaronBrook]

On 3/4/2021 at 2:04 AM, Ferix said:

Thanks for the insight and I hope the best for your journey!

Thanks! It's good to hear that your own journey is progressing quickly and without hurdles.

On 3/4/2021 at 2:04 AM, Ferix said:

I wont have my first visit with a psychiatrist until March 30th. I have never been to a psychiatrist before so I really don't know what to expect or if they will suggest any medication.

Well, it will help if you have a clear idea of what you want help with when going in.

I got meds because I also wanted help to feel good about diaper training. Logically, I know it's a positive change. Emotionally, I'm not there yet. 

March 27th I'm looking into the possibility of doing diaper training on an in-patient basis. Which might be a way to speed things up, but might not be a good fit.

On 3/4/2021 at 2:04 AM, Ferix said:

If there really is a way for a urologist to help me without surgery and achieve incontinence, then I would be happy with that. I just don't see that happening; if something like becoming incontinent without surgery existed, we'd be talking all about that on these forums and I'm sure there'd be more than 5 of us pursuing it right now.

Well, a large number of abdls use informal bladder training. 

We're probably the rare few who have the means and the need to try formal help.

What has helped me make progress so far has been a weekly incontinence log. Just a spreadsheet that lists time of day & if I used my diaper or not. 

Then I can look back over the week for patterns & behavioral fixes that can be made.

 

On 3/6/2021 at 7:21 AM, Diapered Dave said:

"Ok, we want to be SURE this is right for you, so now you are incontinent beyond your control, and we'll see in a year if you still want this permanently.." That way, the patient could experience the desired incontinence, make sure they didn't change their mind about it, and the doctor wouldn't worry about a patient coming back later, with regrets. I'd sign up for a deal like that myself.

I'll ask about this the next time I see my urologist. So far, the closest thing to an instant, long lasting, and temporary treatment I've heard anything about is a chemical sphincterotomy. And those often don't have the desired effect, or they can damage you in the long run.

[Diapered Dave]

2 hours ago, BaronBrook said:

I'll ask about this the next time I see my urologist. So far, the closest thing to an instant, long lasting, and temporary treatment I've heard anything about is a chemical sphincterotomy. And those often don't have the desired effect, or they can damage you in the long run.

"a chemical sphincterotomy"???? What, like Botox?