Jokes

[babylin]

Sorry, I didn't look back to see if this thread is elsewhere here.

I spotted this anecdote on another site and do not know if it is . So I guess this is a review.

I thought this was a nice funny.

Baby

An 18-year-old girl finally had the opportunity to go to a party by herself. Since she was very good-looking, she was a bit nervous about what to do if boys hit on her. Her mom said, "It's very easy! Whenever a boy starts hitting on you, you ask him, 'What will be the name of our baby?' That'll scare them off." So off she went. After a little while at the party, a boy started dancing with her, and little by little he started kissing her and touching her. She asked him, "What will our baby be called?" The boy found some excuse and disappeared. Some time later, the same thing happened again: a boy started to kiss her neck, her shoulders... She stopped him and asked about the baby's name, and he ran off.

Later on, another boy invited her for a walk. After a few minutes, he started kissing her, and she asked him, "What will our baby be called?" He continued, now slowly taking her clothes off. "What will our baby be called?" she asked once more. He began to have sex with her. "What will our baby be called?!" she asked again. After he was done, he took off his "full" condom, gave it a knot, and said, "If he gets out of this one... David Copperfield!

Happiness Is Wearing Cotton Diapers

[wetman]

What do Texas girls use for protection when having sex?

A bus shelter.

[Rihanna]

What did the judge tell the bigamist?

You can't have your Kate and Edith, too.

[PaddedPat]

What did the judge tell the bigamist?

You can't have your Kate and Edith, too.

I just smilingly groaned IRL. Seriously.

I love puns and wordplay. Such a guilty little pleasure...

[Forced2wet]

How do you kill a circus?

Go for the juggler!

[Angela Bauer]

Prosecutor: Your Honor, the Defendant is an electrician named Sparks. He is charged with battery.

Judge: Having found Defendant Sparks guilty as charged, he is sentanced to 30 days in a dry cell.

Sorry, in 1981 during my first year of pre-law, this was what we considered a joke.

[dlover49]

Q: What do you call a twitchy cow?

A: Beef jerky.

Virtually the only G-rated joke I know.

[DailyDi]

What's the difference between 365 condoms and a tire?

One's a Goodyear, and one's a really good year!

[babbler110]

Prosecutor: Your Honor, the Defendant is an electrician named Sparks. He is charged with battery.

Judge: Having found Defendant Sparks guilty as charged, he is sentanced to 30 days in a dry cell.

Sorry, in 1981 during my first year of pre-law, this was what we considered a joke.

Angela - did you study law or were you hoping to become an Electrical Engineer?

[square_duck]

Prosecutor: Your Honor, the Defendant is an electrician named Sparks. He is charged with battery.

Judge: Having found Defendant Sparks guilty as charged, he is sentanced to 30 days in a dry cell.

Sorry, in 1981 during my first year of pre-law, this was what we considered a joke.

very punny!

[rusty pins]

A guy is walking along a pier out into a lake and sees a young woman in a wheelchair at the very end of the pier, crying. He asks, "What's the matter?" She replies, "I'm 21 years old and never been kissed." The young man bends over, takes her in his arms and kisses her on the lips! He walks away from the happy young woman, feeling he's done a good deed.

The next day that same young man sees the same young woman in her wheelchair crying at the end of the pier again! He goes up to her and asks what's wrong. She replies, "I'm 21 years old and I've never been F---KED!" The young man bends down, takes her gently in his arms, then throws her in the lake and says, "Now you're F--KED!"

[Forced2wet]

Leanne Rimes

No it does nt!

[square_duck]

I bet the defendent is in a state of shock over this, and waiting for the circuit judge, hoping that if he conducts himself well and offers no resistance, he will be released and get to go ohm.

WOW! this joke really got some people wired...I wonder how many more will be plugging into this one

[Angela Bauer]

Sadly for Defendant Sparks, by the time the Circuit Court of Appeals met, he had already been sent ohm. But he had learned his lesson. The next time he got drunk he emptied a flashlight into a sock. That time he was convicted of assault with battery!

[rusty pins]

And durring election time does he go to the polls (positive and negative) and volt? That would be a switch!

[tommyp]

So a mushroom walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Hey you can't come in here, we don't serve your kind!" Mushroom says, "Why not? I'm a fungi!"

[square_duck]

And durring election time does he go to the polls (positive and negative) and volt? That would be a switch!

But once to the polls, he found himself being redirected, because he was not old enough to volt, and was a little short on age. Thinking he was old enough though just proved that he really was just a half watt and a bit dim since he couldn't think, much less read

[battlemage]

So... many.... electrifying.... puns...

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

If I claimed to be able to wear 2t sized rubber panties, would that be a stretch?

[rusty pins]

A bear walks into a 7-11 and says, "I want a candy bar and ......................................... a Coke." The clerk says, "Why the big pause?" and the bear says, "Because I'm a bear!" (Pause, Paws for anyone who dosn't get it.)

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

And to think, I passed up reading Maharishi Mahesh Yogi for that joke: Wotta boo-boo!!

[media=]

Summer 1960

[Floaty_Boy]

A rabbi, a policeman, and a duck walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of a joke?"

[square_duck]

A rabbi, a policeman, and a duck walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of a joke?"

I resemble that remark!

[dlover49]

Masochist to sadist: Beat me! Beat me!.

Sadist to masochist: No.

[Honu]

All these good electrical puns and I'm the double E around here! Anyone else comfortable with Kirkoff's Law and Maxwell's equations?