Stroller

Congratulations Bob. I took the same big decision to tell my then girlfriend 30 years ago. It's hard to do isn't it? Now we have two grown-up kids and I'm in nappies full-time. We both do our best to look after each other, and it's really worked out well for us. I hope the same comes true for you - good luck with it!

That's what I've always done. I'm wearing full-time anyway, so when those last drops come out doesn't matter to me. And trying to do something about it goes against the grain for me, when I want no control over my wetting at all. It's never caused any problems, if that's what you're worrying about.

I guess there's quite a few of us in a similar position. I don't worry about it much though. If I end up in hospital it'll have to be in nappies. I wouldn't risk going anywhere unpadded now. I've still no idea whether I could stop wetting if the urge came, but frankly I doubt I've got that control any more. So if (or more likely when) I get outed in medical circles I'll have to own up to being IC & face the music I suppose. Which I should think would be referring me to an IC consultant for a lecture on the options: pelvic floor exercises, drugs, surgery. And then I'll say that Kegel doesn't work for me (a white lie), and that drugs and surgery are definitely out. And then, I imagine, they'll leave me to my nappies in peace. My AB side is a different matter. In hospital I'd be desperate for my dummy and Teddy, but I suppose I'd have to manage without. I could do that. And Betterdry nappies rather than cloth or baby prints. What's on my mind a bit more is what happens if I live to be so old I can't really manage to look after myself any more. My mother's in that position now and we have to help her a lot. Who's going to change my nappies when I can't do it myself any more? I can see me having to tell my daughters all of the story at some point.

All that! Apart from the overhanging shirt & Spanx, which I can get away without. I think that's largely because I'm reasonably slim & wear heavy duty oversize cargo shorts in the summer months (& dungarees in the winter). I don't try to wear terry squares during the day - they're really bulky and can fall down. Velcro or side-poppered pocket nappies work much better for daytime for me. I can conceal plenty of soaker power in the crotch of a pocket nappy cover. What you want to avoid is excess padding at the sides and particularly at the front. You can get away with a lot in the crotch and at the back. Good luck with it Little Sherri!

I had sewing my own as a backstop, but now I don't need to. Drying is an issue, and every 2 days our tumble-dryer is going for about 2 hours drying my nappies. It takes that long to dry my overnight terry squares, so anything that can dry in the same time or less is OK with me. Soaker pads that you have to fold up will dry OK, but multi-layer pads won't, in general. Man-made fibre nappies will dry OK, but thick cotton nappies won't. It'd be nice to be able to line-dry in the summer, but we don't have enough privacy here for that to be practical. I can line-dry my onesies though, as they look pretty much like T-shirts on the line if you don't get too close.

No. It's easier for me to wash my own. I'd be supportive of such services being there though, if it encourages more people to change to cloth. As an AB I don't care what nappies I'm in as long as they work properly. As a part-time adult I feel I need to do my part for the environment and reduce landfill and plastic pollution as much as practical.

My old booster pads are starting to reach the end of their life, so I've been looking for replacements. Perhaps booster pads isn't the best term, as when I'm in pocket-style nappies, they are the only absorbent part, so they're crucial rather than an extra. My old booster pads are a few years old, and from a supplier I no longer deal with, as they owe me money for an order not fulfilled a few years ago. The pads are good ones though: cotton and about 50cm by 50m (20" by 20"). Folded in three they work really well and they're very absorbent. Crucially they dry as quickly as the terry squares I use for my nighttime nappy. Sadly nothing lasts for ever though, and the cotton is starting to disintegrate. One by one I'm having to throw them away. So, what could I replace them with that's easily available here in the UK? First I bought a couple of boosters from Nappies R Us. £4.99, and about 50cm by 20cm (19" by 8"). They are quite thin and made of man-made fibre. I wasn't convinced I wanted them for my daily wear - I'd prefer natural fibre. Secondly I bought a couple from Cuddlz. Slightly shorter than the Nappies R Us boosters, £12.99, and made of multiple layers of terry cotton. These work much better, being very absorbent. The downside though is that they take ages to dry. I'm not prepared to keep the dryer running for long enough to dry them out completely, so I'd need to air dry them for a couple of days after their time in the dryer. I can find a bit of discreet space to dry a couple, but not enough for a full washing machine (10 or 12?) so they're not the solution. I'll probably wear them overnight though. Next I went looking for baby nappies to use as boosters. Most were 60cm by 60cm (2ft square), which is too big for me. A booster 60cm long gives me an unfortunate bulge at the front. Then I found some 50m square nappies on Amazon from merrygoround.co.uk. Cotton and bamboo, soft as anything, they give my nappies an extra bounce! £37.50 for 12, and they're maybe 2/3 as absorbent as my old ones. So I'll be using 3 of these instead of 2 of the old ones. I just love these.

...and I woke early in the morning, dummy still in my mouth, still cuddling Teddy. It was about 5:30 so I tried to get back to sleep, and dozed for a while. At 7 I decided it was time to get up. The rain was pouring down on the tent, but I didn't need to leave it yet. Jamas off, nappy off, and a quick wipe down with a very cold wet flannel - eek! Clean nappy on - again an Overnight with two boosters. Plastic pants back on, my bright red onesie with the animal alphabet on it, and my blue 'vanilla' shortalls, and I was ready for the day. Breakfast in the tent, I managed to pack everything in in a gap between the showers. By 8 I was on my way, via the campsite bins to dump my wet nappies - properly wrapped of course. I had business to do near Glasgow in the morning, not AB-related, which is why I had no time to recharge the electric car. By 10:30 that was dealt with, so I headed over to Edinburgh for the next AB meet. Again I got there just before it opened. That's not usually me - I'm usually late - but on Sunday I got it right, and queued with everyone else at the door. This was an event I'd been to before a number of times, so I knew there'd be people there I knew. It's a really good venue this one - they used to be in a really poky building in the city centre, but now they're in a spacious modern building on an industrial estate that works really well. This was an AB-only event, with no nudity allowed, which was a bit of a relief for me after the pony girls and other see-through tops in Leeds. The trouble is, as soon as I see boobies I just want to latch on, and that's not generally acceptable behaviour with people you don't know. Of course I always behave myself, like a good boy, but it can be a bit upsetting. Well I had a good time at this event too, and I managed to be a bit more sociable this time. Sometimes I don't really feel like talking, and I always do a lot more watching. This time I did talk to lots of people as well, including an 18-year-old boy at his first event. I remembered how terrified I'd been at my first AB event about 35 years ago, and we did what we could to put at his ease. He had a good time anyway! This time I didn't join in the games as they started while I was having an afternoon nap, but I watched them instead. Really my little self is a bit too small to understand party games, so I'm better off just watching. The event was due to end at 6, but I left at 5 as I had a 4-hour drive ahead of me. I missed story time But at least I could drive home with my dummy in my mouth, still half in little land. The rain on the motorway was heavy and so was the traffic, so I was glad to get home. I put a top over my red onesie and shortalls before going inside, as I expecting out daughter would be there, and so she was. Dinner was on the table, and as I hadn't had a proper meal for two days I was glad of that. Food, an hour unwinding in front of the television, then shower, clean nappy and bed, with a glass of milk. Teddy, dummy, a few pages of Terry Pratchett, and I was out like a light.

I'm sitting here in shortalls with my dummy in my mouth to write this. Mummy's in the other room watching the television. It's a busy day for me - washing day. Monday's usually washing day. Not nappies today - I wash them every other day, and this week is a Tuesday/Thursday/Saturday week for washing nappies. I suppose I should write a bit about my weekend. Two littles' meets in two days, plus a lot of driving on busy roads. I had a great time, but I'm a bit tired now. Thursday morning I switched to disposable nappies ready for going away. I always like that - the start of a holiday, even though this one was going to be just the two days. So on Thursday I washed nappies and started with my packing for the weekend. Plus other stuff such as going over to visit my mother (my birth mother) to check she was OK after recent spells in and out of hospital. On Friday I did the week's food shopping and finished my packing. Both a bit complicated. I wanted to buy food to keep me going for a couple of days without cooking facilities, and I've just discovered that my 50-year problems with my digestion are largely down to gluten intolerance. So no bread, pastry, cake, pasta etc. Gluten-free bread exists but it's all pretty revolting. So my weekend was planned round crisps (that's potato chips for you in the US), gluten-free biscuits, milk (of course) and apples to pretend I was having a healthy diet. Oh, and I took some leftovers from the fridge so I had a decent meal lined up for Saturday night. The trouble with adopting a gluten-free diet is that I don;t really know the ropes yet. As for the packing, I had to plan for two AB events plus a night in a tent between the two. I decided to wear shortalls and an AB onesie for the entire weekend, although I packed a vanilla onesie and a pair of cargo shorts just in case. And I had a top I could wear over the onesie/shortalls, so when necessary I could make the onesie invisible and the shortalls look like shorts. I set off late on Saturday morning for a 1 1/2 hour drive over to Leeds, mostly on the very busy M62 motorway. I took Mummy's car - mine's electric and my schedule for the weekend meant I wouldn't have time to recharge the car on the way. So I had to get used to the gearbox again - I usually remembered to change down before coming to a halt and stalling, but not every time. Anyway I arrived at the venue just before it opened at 1pm, in an industrial area just behind a tyre-fitting workshop. There was a handful of others there already, but nobody I recognised. It was my first time at this particular venue, but I was expecting to find one or two people I knew. I was in my 'vanilla' shortalls - dark blue, with the buttoned crotch and sewn-up flies not at all noticeable. The dummy ribbon was a bit of a giveaway I suppose. My onesie on the other hand was bright blue and featured lots of trucks. I'm always shy, but I did get chatting to people as we waited, and then the doors opened and we filed in. I changed into my Lego shoes and my red shortalls once inside. And refilled my sucky cup with milk, as I'd been drinking from it on the drive. My red shortalls are not vanilla at all. Bright red with huge yellow buttons, including yellow buttons fastening the crotch. And Moomintroll on the front pocket. The event was very good. Lots of littles, some games such as pass the parcel. As usual most of the crowd was much younger than me - mostly in their 20s I'd say. Where are the older ABs? Staying at home I think. The sex balance was about 50/50, and there were some furries, plus a couple of pony girls. Most of the males were in nappies and some of the females, which in my experience is pretty typical. Some carers as well. There was a room set aside for nappy changes, although in the end I didn't need it. I'd put on an Overnight with a couple of extra soakers after breakfast, and it easily lasted the day. I spent quite a long time in a high chair, pretending I couldn't get out, and eventually I was rescued - thank you Evie! The event was due to end at 6, but I left about 5, as I had a 4-hour drive north ahead of me. I said my goodbyes and hit the road. I headed for a campsite I've stayed at before, in the Scottish Borders, and arrived there just before 9, just after a heavy bout of rain. Thankfully it had stopped my the time I arrived, so I got the tent up as quickly as I could, and managed to do this just before the next heavy shower started. So now I was in my tent, dry (on the outside), with the next job being to get showered. This can be tricky at campsites here if you're not conventionally dressed. Still in my tent I took off my wet nappy and dressed again, still in my plastic pants. Then it was a dash to the shower block. Where I discovered that although the shower cubicles had doors, the changing area was communal, and there was nowhere in the shower cubicles to hang clothes. And there's me in a clearly AB onesie, shaved from knee to chin, with a very small towel. Well, there was nobody else in there, so I just risked it. I was lucky: nobody else came in for a shower, so I got away with it. A very quick shower, a very quick rub down with the towel, and dressed as quickly as possible, with heart in mouth. Safely back in the tent I had something to eat, and quickly conked out for the night. Dummy in mouth, cuddling Teddy. To be continued in the next thrilling instalment...

Well, yes there are, but it sounds like we're a lot better off here in the UK than you are over the pond. I went to two this weekend. Both were events for littles and there were plenty of pink frocks around, including one Barbie. Maybe you need to emigrate... Good luck with your search anyway.

If you get the chance, it helps a lot to meet other ABs in a safe environment. Here in the UK there are frequent social events - you can find them on fetlife. It's a big step to take, but getting to know other people you have a lot in common with is a good aid to coming to terms with who you are. You can pick up tips too!

I'm always in plastic pants, even when I'm in disposables. It gives an extra layer of warning when I need changing, and it just feels right.

This is true. Every few months I have to replace the velcro on 2 or 3 nappies. It's not a big deal, as long as you can sew a bit. Buy good quality velcro - there is some cheap stuff around that doesn't last well. I don't think the actual Velcro company make it wide enough for most nappies (although you can double up of course). I bought a load of good unbranded hook and loop a while back from myfabrics.co.uk.

I'm in cloth all the time, apart from when we go away and don't have access to a washing machine. I wear cloth principally for environmental reasons. Avoiding disposables altogether is impractical for me, and probably for you too, for the same reason. So you'll have to work on softening up your other half's 'no more disposables' rule. In my experience, pinned or Snappied cloth nappies aren't really practical for daytime wear if you're at all active. They tend to fall down, and they're pretty bulky. I find that pocketed nappy covers work better. The ones fastened with poppers are less bulgy than the velcro ones, which often have a more noticeable front bulge. You'll need a load of soakers to go in the nappies, and you're much safer in plastic pants as well, whatever the manufacturer claims about how waterproof the covers are. I'm generally in velcro nappies in the winter months, under dungarees, and popper nappies in the summer, under cargo shorts. Whatever you wear, they're more visible than disposables, so you need to choose your outer clothes with care. Buy one of every type of cover you can find, and a couple of every soaker, and try them out until you find out what works best for you. The same goes for plastic pants - I'm usually in Gary polyurethane pants, which cover well and are comfortable, but they are pretty noisy. Breathable they are not, which I see as a big advantage. I manage OK with two nappies a day, plus a pinned/Snappied terry nappy overnight. Good Luck!

It's a 'yes' from me. I have to be a lot more careful these days, & head for a toilet at the first sign. No major incidents yet, but there've been a few close calls.

It's just not a problem, for me anyway. That's UK hot weather of course - I've never worn in tropical conditions. I'm OK in a onesie and cargo shorts and a pair of sandals. Although I'm generally in a cloth nappy and plastic pants underneath my onesie, I don't feel any hotter or sweatier than if I wasn't in a nappy. I don't seem to get nappy rash any more than in cooler weather either, but then I don't get skin conditions often anyway.

It's a big change. We were there temporarily for three years, once our younger daughter went off to university. Then she came back, and has been here with us for the past two years. There are signs that she might be off again soon though. We ended up with operating in two different states, depending on whether it was just the two of us in the house... On our own: I can prance around the house in a nappy all I want, I never lock the bathroom door, Teddy is often downstairs on the sofa in the day, dummy in my mouth whenever I feel like it. Mummy brings me a bottle of warm milk when she comes to bed and feeds me. Mummy is totally OK with all this. My wet nappies live in a drybag in the bathroom, & I take them down to buckets by the washing machine each morning. With offspring around: Dressing gown needed when I head for the bathroom, bathroom door locked, Teddy stays under the covers (though not really hidden). My dummy is in my pocket and rarely comes out during the day. I take my own glass of milk up at bedtime - my bedtime remains at 10pm, and Mummy makes sure I stick to it unless there's something special on the telly. Wet nappies now live in the secret cupboard under the bath, and I sneak them down when I can. We're planning to head off for a week's camping next weekend, just the two of us with Binky (dog). That should work fine I think. I'll switch into disposables for the week. If either of the kids were around for that there would be a lot of anxiety on both our parts - there's not much room to hide things when you're camping. Every noise stretches for miles, every bag is near to everyone else. I have to say though that it's a lot easier to keep things private from adult kids than from young kids - once they're older they respect privacy more, and we can give them their own privacy more easily too.

It's another warm sunny day here today, so we've decided it's time for me to switch out of dungarees and into cargo shorts for the summer. I've taken all my shirts and vest onesies out of my shirt drawer, and all my vanilla T-shirt onesies out of the bag under the bed, and I've swapped them round. I've got three new ABU onesies for this summer - orange, purple and bright green. And I've put most of my winter daytime cloth nappies in storage in the garage - the rest will have to wait until after the next wash. They don't really work with cargo shorts as there is a noticeable bulge at the front because of the velcro flaps. My summer daytime nappies have side poppers instead. So tomorrow I'll be in shorts and a onesie, and will stay that way until the autumn. Last night I couldn't sleep properly, so when Mummy came to bed she lay on her back for me to nurse on her for a while. After a bit she rolled onto her side so I could nurse on the other side, until I was sleepy enough. That doesn't happen very often in the middle of the night, but Mummy looks after me when I need her to. I suppose I was nursing for 20 or 30 minutes. Then I was nursing again in the early hours before it was time to get up, I suppose for the same length of time. That happens most mornings, until Mummy tells me I can get up. There's no milk of course, but I pretend, and I feel very little and very close to Mummy. She usually dozes while I'm nursing.

Lets' see... Well I've got about 10 vest-style vanilla onesies, that I wear under my shirt in the winter months. At the moment they're in my chest of drawers in our bedroom (in my shirt drawer). White ones, grey ones and navy blue ones. I've got about 12 t-shirt vanilla onesies, and they're my daily wear in the summer months. At the moment they're in a bag under our bed, as there isn't enough room in my shirt drawer for them. Mostly in bright colours, with a couple in red and white stripes. I've got about half a dozen AB onesies, which I only wear occasionally at home. I mainly wear these at AB events. I'll be switching from dungarees/vest onesie/shirt to cargo shorts/T-shirt onesie in the next week or two I think, when Mummy says I can. It's starting to get a lot warmer here. Then I'll switch the stuff in my short drawer round.

No - they work fine.

My routine is similar, but of course not identical... I don't change in the shower - I just put the wet nappy in a drybag & transfer it to a lidded bucket as & when I can. I wipe myself down with a wet flannel. I wash my nappies every 2 days. That just fits in the washer, and any longer would mean them getting smelly. I use a long 60 degree wash. I use non-bio washing powder & add a couple of caps of anti-bacterial additive. I can't line dry as there's nowhere with enough privacy, so I have to use the tumble-dryer. With my nappies that takes a couple of hours. Plastic pants get a daily wash in hot water in the sink - no detergent.

No. I approached going 24/7 gradually, for a number of reasons. Eventually I'd been 24/7 for months, and I needed the space so I binned my underwear. I hadn't worn it for a long time. It's all a lot easier if you go there gradually, as you've got plenty of time to learn what works best for you, and sort out any issues. Of course, this approach misses out the potential big buzz of going from vanilla to relying on nappies in one big life change, but realistically it works better. And you can pause or retreat as and when you feel you need to.

That would explain the gap between the comments around here and my experience too. It's a long while since I wore Tena nappies, but they worked OK for me. Their pullups are really good: just the job for hiking trips as they don't chafe and are highly resistant to damage - under plastic pants, which is how I wear them. I wouldn't be without them.

Yep. Many years ago, before I took early retirement, I had my strategy down pretty well I think. Firstly I wouldn't go to meetings unless there was a clear agenda written down that made clear what the meeting was intended to achieve. Secondly I wouldn't attend unless someone competent was going to take minutes, assuming the objectives included dishing out work &/or making decisions. Thirdly if I got bored in meetings my objective was to get the meeting to move on to the next item in the agenda, whatever the outcome. All that meant I managed to get a fair amount of work done.

Well yesterday I finally got round to some repairs on a couple of my cloth nappies. These were a couple of my normal daytime nappies from Dotty Diapers. These are really very good nappies, and I must have worn and washed some of the ones I've been wearing for the past years at least 250 times. They look like lasting a lot longer yet. However, they fasten with Velcro-a-like, and that wears out a lot more quickly. So every year or so I need to replace the Velcro. When new, the hook and loop material used in these nappies isn't top quality. The nappies are made in Pakistan, and the hook and loop is presumably sourced there. I bought a load of better quality hook and loop from Germany a while back (pre-Brexit), and that lasts much longer. So yesterday I unpicked all the Velcro from two nappies, and unpicked the stitching along the top of the front of the nappies. If you ever do this, it's much easier if you have the right tool for it (a seam ripper - they don't cost much). The seam along the top front needs unpicking to allow sewing in the replacement Velcro - sewing through the whole thickness of the nappy is too much for Mummy's sewing machine. Next I cut out replacement Velcro, making sure I got the hook and loop in the right order - loop on the front, hooks on the side bits. I rounded the corners to make sure there were no sharp points, as Velcro can scratch skin. Now they're all ready for Mummy to sew in - I'm not big enough to use the sewing machine. She'll do that over the next day or two, or at least that's what she said. I'll have to keep reminding her until she gets grumpy, and then she'll do it.