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Watersports
Pee-play without the diapers!
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On the point of incontinent desires and self harm. I get it makes you cringe @CptKirk. But try to realize that Body Identity Integration Disorder (BIID) with incontinemce is a real thing. I know because I have it. Being incontinent is something I had wanted all my life. Even back before I knew what these feeling meant, before I could even put them into words. I literally felt wrong innmy own bidy unless I was wearing a diaper, but more so with needing to have zero control over my urine. You also have to realize that making ourselves incontinent truly IS what were asking for. BUT it only applies to certain types of incontinence. Mostly functional with little to no feeling. Maybe a slight urge that reminds us at randim times we don't have any control. We are BOT asking for or wanting servere urge incontineme, or pain accompanying every time we have to pee. Or well, you get the picture. We want the "easy to live with" incontinence, not the kind that makes you or I cringe. Yes that means us accepting diapers 24/7. I know you don't want this, but I do. As do many others with this ingrained compulsion. And it IS an ingrained need whichbwe cannot ignore. People like me are driven to need this. It's just ironic the way I ended up becoming incontinent. I wouldn't wish severe painful urges or DSD on to anyone. And here's what I do get with you. IF I ever saw anyone say they want what I have? I'd slap them onnthe back of the head and call them insane. But if I ever saw someone say they were going to so some self surgery on themselves to make it happen. We'll, I'd probably call the police for a welfare check on them. Maybe even try and get them admitted to a mental asylum. Or at the very least go drive to their house and start loudly banging on their door. I totally get you wanting anything like this from happening on the new site. And I'm 100% in agreement with you on it. But you also have to accept that "self harm" doesn't always mean actually harming ones self. It can mean as little as reverse potty training, or even seeking surgery in Mexico from a qualified doctor. When sought after in a healthy way, making one's self incontinent is far from unhealth or cringe inducing. It's accelting that this is just how some of us are wired. But that's just it. How do we make sure nobody crosses the line into doing actual harm to themselves? I know how, by not making them do it by themselves in some dark corner of the web. We have to accept that incontinent desires are a real thing. By giving people a place to talk about it openly. And most importantly, guiding their desire for 24/7 diapers in a healthy manner. I'm sure you've seen me redirect a few people already. Those who want some pill or surgery so they can become fully diaper dependent. Yet I redirect them to start by wearing the diaper and always peeing it it at the slightest urge. This way, with time, they will have exactly what they want. Full diaper dependence via reverse potty training. A type od self harm that isn't actually harmful. That's why I strongly believe we will need an incontinent desires sub forum. It may not be your thing, but for those who it is, they (we) need need a place to talk about it and get that dedicated support. To temper their desires into only what's needed and healthy. Also. I KNOW I read your last post at 1am. It's 4:30am now, and the system says you only posted it 2 hours ago. Except I wasn't even awake at 2:30. Man, these medications are messing with my sleep! -
I had lots of fun with Novelai.net you can also use it to continue long abandoned stories. It pretty much doesn't have a filter -
No potty regret on MESSY MONDAY MORNING in a wet and messy Kiddo Night Premium diaper. I went poopies in my diaper 30 minutes ago while in the kitchen getting coffee and checking emails on my phone. I relaxed, no pushing, while I went potty in my diaper in such a natural way. A slight shiver as warm poopies filled my diaper settling against my perineum may have been the only sign that I was messing my diaper. Walking while I felt the load in my diaper was soothing, followed by the BIG SQUISH sitting here right now. I do get it, that a messy diaper is disgusting to some ABDL's but for me going poopie in my diaper is a simple cathartic pleasure that happens 99% of every morning soon after I get out of bed in my wet diaper. I don't mind cleaning up, only takes me a few minutes to be clean and fresh again. So, no potty regret even when I change my soiled diaper. I suppose the only potty regret that I have is when I have the occasional diaper blow-out, but all is good this morning...at least so far! -
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By Kitty Angel · Posted
127. My Restrictions “A lot of people care about Tess and Spike,” Ffrances said firmly, once we were sitting at the kitchen table and she had properly bandaged my arm. “But from my perspective, it looks like their legal guardians shouldn’t be allowed near the kids.” I opened my mouth to respond in righteous outrage, anger at the pain and at the veiled accusation. Was she really comparing me to that thug? But this was Ffrances, the woman I loved, and in all the time I’d known her she had never shown anything but profound insight. Was she pointing out something that I was too close to see, something that I needed to know? “I would never hurt Tess!” I protested, but her eyes were still on my shoulder. Tess was in the hospital now. I didn’t know exactly what happened, but I knew that Duke Torrance was responsible. I had painted the target for him, putting her in danger. I told myself that I hadn’t meant to; that I’d thought he would only hurt the boy. But that wasn’t what had happened, and I had to accept responsibility for the consequences of my actions. “How could I have known that guy would…” “You could have listened, instead of trying to fit people into the story you see in your head. You could have wondered why Spike is so scared of his stepfather. Spike already told you enough to know that you were causing a big problem. Or if you don’t trust his words, you could have listened when other people told you the same. Tess has said it before. I’ve mentioned it. I’ve heard John Naylor tell you on the phone as well. That’s why they invited Spike to stay with them several times last year: because they knew that it wasn’t safe for him to be around Duke and Walt. You’ve been told so many times, but you just don’t listen because you want a reason to see Spike as the bad guy. You didn’t even listen when I repeated it to you.” And I should have drawn different inferences from the way the guy treated his own wife. I knew that now, and I couldn’t believe that I’d been so blind. “I just… Tess was getting upset. That boy did something to hurt her, and then he wouldn’t take a hint when she wasn’t returning his messages. He kept on bothering her, I thought that his father… Okay, I screwed up. I know that. I’m just used to good families, where the parents are there to keep their kids on the right path. I just… my mental image of criminals like that, they’re the ones who disappoint their fathers, or they’re a whole clan you’d do better to avoid. I don’t like to think of Tess ending up with someone who’s come from that kind of background. You never know what they’re going to do. And it just never occurred to me that there might be a risk to her. I just… I’m telling myself stories. That’s what you said, right? And I was so worried about her, I thought maybe the guy could get him to leave her alone. She’s so vulnerable, so young, and I don’t want to see that innocence shattered. I never thought he would… How could anyone…” “Listen,” Ffrances said. “You want Tess to be sweet and innocent, like you remember when you used to be her babysitter. But she isn’t that person anymore. She’s a strong young woman now. She understands the dynamics of that kind of broken family. She worked out exactly what she needs to do to get Spike away from that situation, so he can grow up in a supportive environment, and so that she doesn’t have to worry about him anymore. Where you saw a stereotype of a criminal based on your complete lack of experience, Tess talked to Spike until she understood the situation. She listened to all the other kids at school. She knows the word on the street, knows how dangerous the Torrance family is. And she’s decided to fix it.” “But she–” “She is not your precious little doll. Understand? I’ve talked to her about this, and I’ve talked to the police. And Tess knows exactly what she is doing. When it comes to dealing with Duke and his ilk, she knows a good deal more than you. All she doesn’t know, right now, is that you are responsible for this latest escalation. Can you give me a good reason why I shouldn’t fill in the blanks for her?” “I never meant for her to get hurt. Please, I’ll listen now. I won’t go near that guy again. If Tess is upset, I’ll ask you what I should do. I promise, I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right. Maybe I can never make it up to her… but please don’t tell her?” I didn’t know what I was more scared of. Even if Ffrances said Tess was okay, I was scared of losing my little girl. But just as much, I hated the thought of losing Tess’s trust. If she knew that this was my fault, she might never be my baby again. Maybe I didn’t deserve to look after a child, if I could put her in danger without thinking. There was nothing I could really do to make amends now, but I wanted her to at least let me try. “Hmm…” Ffrances said slowly. “I think you really just haven’t been thinking things through enough. You didn’t get what you wanted, so you set out to hurt someone without considering the consequences. That’s an extremely childish attitude, you know? While Tess has been acting like an adult the whole time. Maybe you’d do better if you reverse your roles for a while.” “What?” I gasped; I couldn’t even understand why she would say that. But there was no detail that I could put my finger on and say that it was wrong. “I can’t…” “It’s okay, you don’t have to. But if I find out you’ve done something like this again, then you’re the baby of the house until I think you understand what you’ve done. Okay? A punishment that you might not enjoy so much. Or perhaps it would be more appropriate if I had Tess move in with me, where I can guarantee she will be safe. I know we’d have her parents’ support if they heard what you did. But for now… You don’t want her to know that this was your fault. You care about what she thinks of you, and I think that must mean that you care for her in some way. So okay. If you can follow a few extra rules, you can have one last chance.” “Thank you!” I gasped, “I promise I’ll do whatever you say. I can–” But Ffrances wasn’t finished yet, and shut me up with another firm jab in the shoulder. “But!” she said. “You need to show me that you recognise Tess’s independence, and respect her judgement. She is very mature for her age, and she needs the freedom to prove herself. And she’s already shown that her decision-making is better than yours. So from now on, you don’t say ‘no’ to her. Understand? She makes the choices about her own life, and her own future. If she wants to do something, you say it’s fine. If she asks you to do something, you do your best to help her. You can ask for something in exchange if it’s reasonable, but you don’t refuse. If you really think she’s making a bad choice then you can insist she asks me. But you are no longer allowed to tell her what she can and can’t do. She has already shown much better judgement than you. Do you get that?” I agreed, as much as I was worried about putting even more responsibility on the little girl’s shoulders. She was in a tough situation, and when she came home she would need that precious littlespace more than ever to help her recover; but I knew she would resist, and Ffrances was saying that I had less power to make decisions for my little. That sounded like it wouldn’t be such a good idea; but I had to accept that I had done a stupid thing, and now I was ready to take the consequences. As far as Tess was concerned, I would have to let her make her own decisions, and accept that I had no authority to overrule her. The hardest part was that Ffrances insisted it wasn’t my responsibility to take Tess clothes, toiletries, or whatever while she was in the hospital. Tess wanted to be a big girl, and in the circumstances nobody was allowed in to see her unless she said so. And, Ffrances said, she had decided that she didn’t want visitors. I wasn’t happy about that, but I accepted that it was Tess’s choice. I sent her a few messages on XV, asking if she wanted anything, or offering cupcakes, but I got no response. Maybe that would be a good thing, in a way. I was sure that she would get bored if she was stuck in there on her own for a long time. She didn’t even want to tell me what had happened, which made sense if she didn’t know about my interaction with the terrible Mr Torrance. I would stay away from her, and she would get lonely. And she would be wetting the bed every night; I made sure to remind her to surprise herself every day. If she didn’t realise the connection between that and her attempts to be an adult, I was sure I would work out some way to remind her. But I wouldn’t mention it; the more she tried to deal with it herself, the worse it would get. She could spot the pattern herself, and she would trust the conclusion more if I wasn’t treating her like a child at the time. When she came back, I was sure, she would really be missing her evenings in littlespace. I would have my baby back, she would be less stressed, and she would be dry for the first night all week. I was sure that would be enough to show her that she needed to be my baby sometimes. * * * The following Monday, I noticed that Tess still wasn’t replying to all my offers of help. I had missed her, and I knew that she needed my support. It might take a little more persuasion to make her realise just how much she was missing me. I hoped that she would be home soon, but until that happened I wanted to make certain that she learned the downsides of pretending that she was an adult. “Are you doing okay?” I typed into XV. “Do you need me to speak to your teachers so you can find out what you are missing? I’m sure you’re doing great there, but remember that you don’t have to keep being a grown-up. You can call me any time. And you’ll surprise yourself by having an accident like a baby the next time someone asks how you are.” I didn’t want to push it too much, but I resolved that my little baby had been on her own for too long, and the stress of being an adult must really be getting her. Now, she would be having an accident once or twice each day, as well as in the night, until she came home and took the time to relax as a child again. I sent another message on Thursday, similar to the last. Two little accidents this time, just to remind her of how much pressure she was putting herself under without me there to support her. And then I had to force myself to put Tess and her problems out of my mind for a while, because I was making sure that all my preparations for the next day were going to go perfectly. Isaac reassured me that the comics would be arriving first thing in the morning, so I could go out to pick them up and then collect Ffrances from her house. Maybe, if I was lucky, I could stop in at PRMCT and visit Tess as well; but I didn’t want to be pushy. The restaurant was booked for lunch, and I was sure that everything was going to go perfectly. After double-checking with the restaurant that I had the right time for our reservation, I felt like I could finally start to relax. Everything was in place for the most romantic proposal. It was a shame to do something so important while Tess couldn’t be at home to congratulate us when we returned; but it was too late to change now after all my plans. I put the phone down, and saw that I had an email from Maurice Kernigan; a preview of the page he had modified for me. There was a silhouette in the centre, surrounded by swirling paper notes with other people’s emails on. It was a symbolic representation of a physical entry into the data world, and fit in perfectly with the way that Kernigan liked to represent magic. There were no flashy lightning bolts here, but physical objects that were little more than a metaphor. It took me about a minute to find the note with Ffrances’s screen name on, and the simple message below it. He only included half the page, which made me wonder if there was something in the top half that he would consider a spoiler, but it was more than enough to make me feel that tomorrow was going to go perfectly. The one thing I wasn’t expecting was a ping from the office computer, telling me that I had a meeting to attend. I wondered what had happened; had somebody in the office added me to a conference I didn’t know about? Was I getting summoned to a superior’s office for some kind of reward or reprimand? But I was surprised to see on the calendar that it had been created by the temp, Carter. And it was coloured gold, to indicate personal business. That puzzled me even more, until I clicked on the meeting and saw what had been entered in the comments field: “Your cousin Tess is at the front desk. Wants to see you ASAP.” I couldn’t guess why she had come here rather than home, but if she was out of the hospital then I knew I had to see her right away. She would be so happy to see me again, and maybe she just couldn’t wait to drop all the adult roles that had been oppressing her for the week so far. I cleared the rest of my appointments for the day, took note of the room number where she was apparently waiting for me, and jogged off down the corridor. I wonder how long it'll be before Tess wants something that Gabby really wants to say 'no' to… What do you think it will be? Will it be soon? And how do you think Gabby will react?
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