Do you think we are a different breed than most ABDLs, or just further along the continuum?

[Enthusi]

I have a lot of ABDL friends in IRL who love wearing and using diapers just as much as I do.   But none of them share the same urge I had (have) to be diaper dependent and stuck in diapers for life.  I’ve always wondered what’s up with that. 

[Kif]

I've wondered that myself, we definitely appear to be a minority within this minority. 

Like, there's a few people I know that are untraining (or heavily flirting with it) but a lot seem just interested in keeping it a scene. And, for those that *are* interested in aspects of untraining even that has variation: some just want bedwetting, others only daywetting, and some all of it. 

Which...if you count folks like me that want *all* of it, puts us in a minority of a minority within a minority.

AND THEN... *rambles incoherently* ?

But seriously, I am curious why that is for some of us too. 

Without doing some kind of survey, it's hard to tell. The thread Kali is following (that we have existing continence issues and deny them) seems to work for some folks, but not all. It definitely applies to me to some extent (or...maybe entirely considering my denial tbh).

I used to *want* to say it's something trauma related but...having worked through soooo much of that this past year (I feel I'm done tbh), I can't help but wonder if it's less that and something just...innate. I've honestly felt this way my whole life, and the way I've been treated because of that is what led to a lot of the trauma I worked through (not the other way around).

And so the more I've come to move on and accept myself, the more I've come to just...see myself as someone that has potty issues, and separately (but almost as strongly) as Little. They feel almost like two independent sled dogs...they're both pulling and agreeing on the overall direction, but they're different somehow and I can't explain why I feel that way. And I don't exactly feel like I'm at the helm either...maybe sled dogs is a bad metaphor haha ?

[Unseendl]

I see it as a couple of different ways.

I’m not directly a part of the LGBTQ+ community, but a really good friend I’ve known since we were in high school, has started transitioning earlier this year. After talking with her and asking her a few questions, she stated that she always knew something was off, but it took her many years to understand what it actually was. Once she figured it out, she finally feels normal, for what normal is to her.

That's how I see this kink/love/characteristic; we're all human beings who just happen to enjoy diapers and the like, but what is "normal" to one person is not going to be the same to another. This part just happens to be normal to me/us, and as such I know at least I just feel "normal" when I'm in diapers

[cathdiap]

My incontinence desire and diaper fetish are a manifestation of an underlying feeling that I have never felt one of them. I am a loner, almost a hermit and a conspiracytheorist. More of an observer than a participant of life and yet, here I am, alive and walking around like I am one of the many, but not knowing what the heck I am supposed to be doing here in this insane world. Being incontinent puts me in submission and leaves me comfortably numb in my diapers. I like to think I am the only one this crazy, or at least one of the very few. 

So in short, it is a coping mechanism. 

[CodHero24]

I always felt like If I was diaper dependent, I would no longer be "weird" for wanting to wear diapers..

Because at that point, I would be wearing them because I need them...

I always wear to bed now, and on long car rides, airplanes, etc.

[Kevin140]

I thought for a long time that I didn't belong here either. Because I don't follow the whole 24/7 or bedwetting program.

But OAB is what I wish for, a bit of control but sometimes not making it to the bathroom in time. Knowing that I can't hold out much longer having to wear diapers for these situations.

Simply not being able or having to control everything anymore, but not giving up everything.

[dlnoir]

Good question and frankly do not have any answers, I can only draw from my own thoughts, feelings and experience. I however do not think we are further down the line in the continuum we are just following our desires and maybe dreams, my take on it. On a personal level I have rather strong memories going back to the age of three years old wanting to be back in diapers and fortunately I was allowed to do so. I was allowed to wear them but not allowed to use them this felt very wrong to me and in a way conflicting. I can’t say I feel like a baby throughout the day for I am a diaper lover at least that fits the bill best although if I wake up in the morning and my diaper is soaked front to back it feels very babyish and I need time to get that feeling out of my system. In general I get out of bed an hour earlier then what is actually needed for me to get ready for work. I really like the fact that I have no control over my wettings as it make me feel complete and how it is supposed to be. These two worlds are miles apart, on one hand being an adult taking its adult responsibilities and on the other hand being diaper dependent in order to feel complete and functional. With functional I mean focused on my adult tasks. I do belief that it is some sort of coping mechanism only how it came to be and why it manifested itself on such an early age (in my case) big question I don’t know do not have any answers.

 

[kittengirl173]

On 12/29/2022 at 11:22 AM, Kif said:

I used to *want* to say it's something trauma related but...having worked through soooo much of that this past year (I feel I'm done tbh), I can't help but wonder if it's less that and something just...innate. I've honestly felt this way my whole life, and the way I've been treated because of that is what led to a lot of the trauma I worked through (not the other way around).

I think for me, a lot of my little explorations is trauma-based, but I was probably always going to have a childlike wonder to my personality. Incontinence seems to make sense on top of that because it helps aid in my carefree, excitable nature.

To answer Enthusi's question, I think some of us who want incontinence are littles who age regress for non-sexual reasons (though ABDL may of course be in our sexuality as well for some of us), and so it's natural that incontinence also appears as something we identify with. it's hard to say why we want it so much though.

[diapered_jeff48801]

I think it's just something that's always been with me. I've always wanted to be back in diapers for as long as I can remember.

I used to believe it was trauma based, but upon reflection, I recall a desire even before the trauma (although it was kicked into high gear following it.) It was also nonsexual before it became sexual, but is now a mix of both.

I guess I'm just complicated lol.

 

[kittengirl173]

I guess what's hard for me is I don't know exactly when my trauma started. It started for sure when I was 12 and my parents didn't accept my gender, but there were also parts before then that suggest my parents didn't treat me well either before. I do know that I've loved diapers for a long time. ❤️

[Hannah YMS]

To answer OP's question directly, I say there's a good chance we're a different breed among the rest. In the end, we're all ABDL but there are almost an infinite number of breeds of us. You're either into untraining or not, and if you are, for almost whatever reason, the reason probably doesn't matter.

I share @Enthusi and @Kif's innate need to be incontinent. It's difficult to understand why. I'm at the point where I've accepted it and I am actively untraining. There may be one dividing line (not that we need any). If you've been put through humiliating situations in your life (I'm looking at you, hospital visits) due to the need to be incontinent, then I'd say you've reached a tier where you're willing to do almost anything. It's one thing to pursue 24/7, it's another to change your entire life in spite of embarrassment and humiliation, divorces, and other bad stuff.

[PlstkBakdnghtnday]

I think having a partner in this to encourage you and your compulsion to wear and need diapers is something that could make all the difference. Whether it's a kindred spirit, or someone who just loves you for who you are, acceptance I think is the biggest part of answering why.

[MrTheFox1157]

I have good memory and my memory starts from when I was 3. Long before diapers were sexual I had dysphoria about not wearing and needing them. As a kid it felt like a part of me was dying pooping in the toilet. My partner is just a big as an abdl as me but he doesn't have a desire for 24/7 and with his bladder of steel and how poop shy he is, he would have a really hard time untraining too. I guess the difference is I just have major dysphoria about it.

[eatenbywo1ves]

Many can a-test to answer "Uhhh since I can remember, always I guess... maybe?" when asked one question.

While I might be a world class moron I have been lurking or involved in some manner for 20-21 years cause of a fucking goodnites ad in a magazine.

Premiumly "autistic" about the dumbest shit like "HOW DO I GET MY TAPES PERFECT?!?!?"
 

You don't, none of us ever do and I still find myself occasionally doing whole gotta make things look right against making sure its fitted correctly...

Honestly we are pretty tame and run of the mill honestly, the rest of those nutjobs not us are the issue/different breed.

Yup, perfectly normal we are.

[stevewet]

On 12/29/2022 at 3:00 PM, Enthusi said:

I have a lot of ABDL friends in IRL who love wearing and using diapers just as much as I do.   But none of them share the same urge I had (have) to be diaper dependent and stuck in diapers for life.  I’ve always wondered what’s up with that. 

I guess most people want to be in charge of when they wear nappies and not be stuck in them all the time.