I’m still waiting for incontinence to cause me shame and embarrassment.

[Enthusi]

So I realize my story is a bit different in that I was an ABDL who untrained.  But these days I am as diaper dependent as anyone who wears them for medical reasons. 

Over the years I’ve been in all sorts of potentially compromising situations related to being incontinent. This includes getting flagged in airport security resulting in pat downs. I’ve gone to dozens of doctors appointments over the years,  some of which required stripping down to my diaper.  I’ve had had my diaper bag searched at amusement parks and sporting events more time than I can count. I usually buy baggy pants which I take to a tailor with the request to hide the diaper bulge as much as possible. One time I left my work bag somewhere and I got a call saying they found it and identified it as mine because they opened it up and found my name on a some documents, which means they would have also seen the spare diaper I keep in there. I have no hesitation about walking into a pharmacy to buy adult diapers for me to use while at the gym. I usually crinkle when I walk. A few times a year I experience a bad leak when out and about, which aren’t always possible to completely hide. Everyone in my immediate family knows I wear diapers.  Heck one time I fell asleep on a bench at the airport during a layover and upon waking up I realized the back of my shirt had gotten tucked into my diaper.  

So you would think by now someone somewhere would snicker at me or make an offhand comment of some sort. But it just hasn’t happened.  Most people couldn’t care less and act super cool and professional about it.  
In fact because no one in seems to notice or care that I wear diapers, I have become less guarded and nonchalant about them, such as when I go to change in a bathroom stall.  I’ve walked into a crowded bathroom with a clean diaper in my hand…  Rip rip rip rip crinkle crinkle, rip rip rip rip.  I step out of the stall and chuck the old diaper into the trash next to the sink, wash my hands and be on my way.  And STILL nobody has said anything to me. 

Not that I’m complaining…

[Little Belle]

The older I get the more I realise that although we are the centre of our own worlds (or kind of should be) we definitely aren't the centre of everyone else's. Therefore, people don't tend to notice other people all that much really. Not the average looking, average age people anyway. Sure they'll notice the obviously different stuff - obvious disabilities for example - but nappy wearing is just too subtle generally. Some people without a nappy have a huge bum anyway and some skinny people who wear nappies end up with a normal sized bum! Unless you've worn an adult nappy I don't think you would ever expect someone else to be wearing one and wouldn't know the signs (crinkly walk, backpack, choosing the disabled loo stall). 

And I also think the more confident you are about it yourself, the less obvious you make it. For example, peeking round the corner as you come out of a stall with a used nappy bag to see if anyone is there is obviously going to make people look rather than someone just marching out and throwing something in the bin.

Confident is a difficult trick but a trick nonetheless! 

[BabyBoi91]

On 11/12/2022 at 11:13 PM, Enthusi said:

So I realize my story is a bit different in that I was an ABDL who untrained.  But these days I am as diaper dependent as anyone who wears them for medical reasons. 

Over the years I’ve been in all sorts of potentially compromising situations related to being incontinent. This includes getting flagged in airport security resulting in pat downs. I’ve gone to dozens of doctors appointments over the years,  some of which required stripping down to my diaper.  I’ve had had my diaper bag searched at amusement parks and sporting events more time than I can count. I usually buy baggy pants which I take to a tailor with the request to hide the diaper bulge as much as possible. One time I left my work bag somewhere and I got a call saying they found it and identified it as mine because they opened it up and found my name on a some documents, which means they would have also seen the spare diaper I keep in there. I have no hesitation about walking into a pharmacy to buy adult diapers for me to use while at the gym. I usually crinkle when I walk. A few times a year I experience a bad leak when out and about, which aren’t always possible to completely hide. Everyone in my immediate family knows I wear diapers.  Heck one time I fell asleep on a bench at the airport during a layover and upon waking up I realized the back of my shirt had gotten tucked into my diaper.  

So you would think by now someone somewhere would snicker at me or make an offhand comment of some sort. But it just hasn’t happened.  Most people couldn’t care less and act super cool and professional about it.  
In fact because no one in seems to notice or care that I wear diapers, I have become less guarded and nonchalant about them, such as when I go to change in a bathroom stall.  I’ve walked into a crowded bathroom with a clean diaper in my hand…  Rip rip rip rip crinkle crinkle, rip rip rip rip.  I step out of the stall and chuck the old diaper into the trash next to the sink, wash my hands and be on my way.  And STILL nobody has said anything to me. 

Not that I’m complaining…

I will say your title comes off as a little tone deaf. ? (no, I’m not shaming you. I’m just giving some feedback to a friend ?)

I think incontinence, urinary and especially fecal incontinence, can be very anxiety provoking / shame inducing for some people.  So saying, “I’m still waiting for it to cause me shame or embarrassment…” may make a lot of eye rolls . 
 

like, “well, someone is young, inexperienced, and/or thinks they’re invulnerable to fate and time…” 

****

Just to play devil’s advocate (warning: potential triggers below)…. 

What if you were fired from your job because they downsized, and you had also begun to develop bowel incontinence  regularly (especially fecal stress incontinence)… and sure you can take pills for the smell . But they can interact with other meds and don’t really make the smell go away; for some people they don’t work at all. 
 

And what happens when you go for new job interviews? Are you doing bowel preps every single day, maybe 2, and hoping you got everything ? Hoping you don’t defecate mid interview ? Or do you just wing it and hope fate is nice to you?—cu l you know if your bowels release everything mid interview because you sneeze, everyone there is gonna know you shit yourself. And while ADA is a thing…you still have to be able to do your job and they may consider “pooping yourself uncontrollably in front of people” unable to do the task you need to do. Harsh, but quite possible.
 

not to mention, say you manage to get the job… you still have to go to work, but your urinary incontinence has progressed to bowel incontinence due to years of pelvic floor weakness. How is this gonna affect you? Are you just doing daily bowel irrigation? Which is going to destroy your peristalsis—you will basically be doing bowel irrigation for life—or are you just letting yourself crap yourself at work: which you have no clue when it will happen, who with / in front of. 

what if your sensation decreases and you stop noticing how wet something or you’re unable to detect leaks? Sure, changing on a set schedule is a good solution, but sometimes even those fail and you have a massive wet spot on your butt and the whole office sees it but you don’t even know it.
 

and don’t forget the flatulence ! That seeps out now too. It’s sometimes really loud and embarrassing and you have control of that either , and it smellla horrible. 

****
I’m not saying don’t enjoy your life and don’t be your best self. 
 

I’m just questioning if whether it may be better to sometimes walk our lives with some humility. If not for our benefit, then for the benefit of those with whom we walk alongside. 

For many people, sudden onset of incontinence robs them of their sense of self. For others, becoming incontinence helps them find their whole sense of self. 
 

but I think both sides can have to face issues of shame or anxiety. To write them off, I believe, is just asking to be blindsided. 

[willnotwill]

I had serious problems worrying about it and worse being embarrassed when the accidents happened when I was younger.   Now I'm just of the, yeah it happens situation.

[babykeiff]

On 11/13/2022 at 10:14 AM, Little Belle said:

The older I get the more I realise that although we are the centre of our own worlds (or kind of should be) we definitely aren't the centre of everyone else's. Therefore, people don't tend to notice other people all that much really. Not the average looking, average age people anyway. Sure they'll notice the obviously different stuff - obvious disabilities for example - but nappy wearing is just too subtle generally. Some people without a nappy have a huge bum anyway and some skinny people who wear nappies end up with a normal sized bum! Unless you've worn an adult nappy I don't think you would ever expect someone else to be wearing one and wouldn't know the signs (crinkly walk, backpack, choosing the disabled loo stall). 

And I also think the more confident you are about it yourself, the less obvious you make it. For example, peeking round the corner as you come out of a stall with a used nappy bag to see if anyone is there is obviously going to make people look rather than someone just marching out and throwing something in the bin.

Confident is a difficult trick but a trick nonetheless! 

I admire your attidude, strength and intelligence, and only wish that others were as smart as you to realise what you have worked out, but presume that it has taken you both time and some risk for you to come to this realisation. The realisation is that others do not know the size of ones butt, and without that information, cannot derive whether one is wearing protection.

In relation to confidence being a trick, it is not a trick. It is based on knowledge and information. As a newborn, when one was away from its parents, the newborn was scared and would cry. As the newborn learnt about object permanance, the parent could move to another room and the newborn would not become scared. As adults, we have the ability to rationalise all information, and that itself, allows us to be confident. Other behaviours of mitigating risks and/or trying things out teach us what works and what fails. All we do is implement what works and reduce / elimiate what fails. Your action of 'playing confident' and marching to a bin to dispose of a used nappy rather than 'acting cautious' has taught you to evaluate others behaviour and reactions and therefore, alter your behaviour to portray what you want others to see / ignore. It is almost manipulating your world to your advantage - but that itself, is life, attempting to control anothers perceptions of you.

We are all actors, and repetition teaches us to be masters at our craft - but this is based on our understanding of human behaviour - ours and others. Be careful as repetition also cause us to make mistakes / make presumptions. Project management attempt to control a sequence of events (processes) to obtain a goal. However, goal seeking may work in most cases, in correct project management one must allow for individual processes to fail / not reach defined objectives. This is allowing for failure / and creating other processes as a way to handle that. Projects also 'crash' for unforseen reasons, and/or people not acting in what we percieve they would act.

Confidence is therefore an illusion at best, not a trick and based on what we think will happen. The more confident one is, the more experience one has in that situation - not in its ideal outcome, but more in our handling of the situation when it goes wrong.

Your action of marching out and placing the used item in the bin instead of checking if you are alone is an option, but, there will be the time that a nosey person will want to know what you placed in the bin - and will go check after you leave the bathroom. As a result, I strongly suggest that you avoid that type of action in your place of work.

 

[Little Belle]

36 minutes ago, babykeiff said:

I admire your attidude, strength and intelligence, and only wish that others were as smart as you to realise what you have worked out, but presume that it has taken you both time and some risk for you to come to this realisation. The realisation is that others do not know the size of ones butt, and without that information, cannot derive whether one is wearing protection.

In relation to confidence being a trick, it is not a trick. It is based on knowledge and information. As a newborn, when one was away from its parents, the newborn was scared and would cry. As the newborn learnt about object permanance, the parent could move to another room and the newborn would not become scared. As adults, we have the ability to rationalise all information, and that itself, allows us to be confident. Other behaviours of mitigating risks and/or trying things out teach us what works and what fails. All we do is implement what works and reduce / elimiate what fails. Your action of 'playing confident' and marching to a bin to dispose of a used nappy rather than 'acting cautious' has taught you to evaluate others behaviour and reactions and therefore, alter your behaviour to portray what you want others to see / ignore. It is almost manipulating your world to your advantage - but that itself, is life, attempting to control anothers perceptions of you.

We are all actors, and repetition teaches us to be masters at our craft - but this is based on our understanding of human behaviour - ours and others. Be careful as repetition also cause us to make mistakes / make presumptions. Project management attempt to control a sequence of events (processes) to obtain a goal. However, goal seeking may work in most cases, in correct project management one must allow for individual processes to fail / not reach defined objectives. This is allowing for failure / and creating other processes as a way to handle that. Projects also 'crash' for unforseen reasons, and/or people not acting in what we percieve they would act.

Confidence is therefore an illusion at best, not a trick and based on what we think will happen. The more confident one is, the more experience one has in that situation - not in its ideal outcome, but more in our handling of the situation when it goes wrong.

Your action of marching out and placing the used item in the bin instead of checking if you are alone is an option, but, there will be the time that a nosey person will want to know what you placed in the bin - and will go check after you leave the bathroom. As a result, I strongly suggest that you avoid that type of action in your place of work.

 

@babykeiff I feel seen! You have called me out as my autistic self! I have a blindness to what people think so I've learnt to not care. I am unsure how to behave in a NT world so I play the role of a confident person who has her s*it together. 

I actually think this is why I've been able to adapt to the 24/7 lifestyle so easily - that and the fact it totally feeds my sensory needs to have the safety and comfort of nappies.

I've never been read so perfectly and I am genuinely impressed!

 

[babykeiff]

1 hour ago, Little Belle said:

@babykeiff I feel seen! You have called me out as my autistic self! I have a blindness to what people think so I've learnt to not care. I am unsure how to behave in a NT world so I play the role of a confident person who has her s*it together. 

I actually think this is why I've been able to adapt to the 24/7 lifestyle so easily - that and the fact it totally feeds my sensory needs to have the safety and comfort of nappies.

I've never been read so perfectly and I am genuinely impressed!

 

@Little Belle

Please don't feel fear by me reading you. What you are seeing is classed as 'confirmation bias'. That is confirming a result in your mind based on one vaugue fact - and then convincing yourself that such is true by either accepting or ignoring relevant details. It is a methodology that some scam artists use to gain our confidence and basically steal from us.

What I have learnt over time is that people are totally predictable and transperant. We are all from the same 'mold' so to speak, and we behave exactly the same. We all have the same fears, hopes and expectations. Your statement re: 'butt size' is true. Your confidence in your actions is not based on your autistic blindness - as you state, but in your observance of how others behave. We are our own worst critics and expect others to see the world in how we see it. As you have stated correctly, everyone, like ourselves, are self centered and only see what we wish to see - again 'confirmation bias'. This is why it is insane to argue with a child / one who obviously (to us) seem less intelligent. You yourself are more observant (one of the traits of autism) in precise details to such an extent that can be blind to the full picture. This gives you a hugh advantage in 'acting' normal so that your actions do not draw attention of others.

In simple terms, your self confidence should exist. You, and I wear 24/7/365 and the only people that are aware of it are our close contacts - those peope who respect us enough not to embarrass us. The rest of the world might notice a difference, but do not have the relevant details to either confirm or deny what they presume. Actually, they have the pseudo details to presume that nobody would wear a diaper in public - and convince themselves of that fact (confirmation bias). This plays to our advantage and protects our modesty.

What I do suggest is that you are careful around those who look for ways to cause trouble - mostly one sees them in places of work etc., and these people are trying to improve themselves on the backs of others - the same people that would shake your hand and congratulate you for a work achievement and at the same time, stick a knife in your back. Normally, these people are so focused on what others think of themselves, they're usually otherwise occupied to get their own work done to any standards.

[~Brian~]

@Little Belle

being able to deal with situations as necessary Is a skill everyone needs to learn. Is how we learn how to deal with situations. being that someone may be autistic, they may find ways that are totally different or alien to those that are not autistic to be able to deal with daily day situations. part of that may that they become more confident as they do things on a normal everyday basis, and for them their normal is their normal. this is necessarily indicating that my normal is not yours, but each person deals with their disability in a different way.

People that are autistic also have different ways of being able to world around them. I have friends of mine that may not be able to speak at all, but they are still able to use either sign language, pictures, or maybe even an ipad which is specifically designed for them to be able to communicate. i've had a friend of mine for example that I went to high school with period her two sons were born and then eventually they ended up Checking out of the world around them, and they originally were worried about them, because both of them were exhibiting the same symptoms. eventually they were able to determine that both of her sons were autistic. One son communicates in a totally different manner to the other but they both love each other very much and they are almost inseparable like two volumes of an Encyclopedia which is 1 letter apart. one of them communicates communicates with sign language while the other one communicates with a ipad. both of them have ipads and both of them are Are specialized because of what they do. one may not use all the functionality of such an ipad, while the other Now communicating with his mother with voice and with writing.

The most important thing is that you should be proud of whoever you are and what you are. you may have autism but autism does not have to have you! that you can walk out into a situation and say OK this is what we're dealing with this is what I got and this is what I'm gonna deal with! They say that kids have to learn the fear reaction so that they don't end up overdoing it, or possibly hurting themselves because they realize that something can scare them. part of the deal of being incontinent is that you have to be in a situation where you accept You accept your particular situation and that you're not afraid of it. @babykeiff Is right when he says that it is awesome that you are able to just walk right out there and deal with it as plain as a pancake on a platter. You've accepted that you need your diapers, you've accepted that you use your diapers, and it is normal for you, and you were not afraid of it nor are you afraid to admit that you need them. part of the deal is that when you're autistic, you may need a Since in certain areas, you may need assistance to learn particular ways to deal with situations. for example, you may do things in a particular way in a particular time period on a particular day, or you may do things at a particular month time or time or whatever. How you deal with things. being able to be forthright and honest and being able to deal with the fact that you are incontinent is incredible. there. there are a lot of people that may not be able to see that, And they feel like it is an embarrassment to them, but if you are able to embrace it and be able to deal with it in an appropriate manner, that is awesome. the next thing that people sometimes have to do after acceptance and being able to understand that this is the way they are common Is to decide how they're going to deal with it. if you have a good attitude about things, and you know that you need them, and you know that they make you feel good, or because of your sensory Situation, having a diaper on is like having a nice warm blanket wrapped around you in the middle of the night, you aren't getting away from that blanket, but that blanket is going to keep you warm and safe. I get it, in fact I tell you go and embrace it all the way that is the way to handle it.

Once you learn how to deal with certain situations and you know how you want to proceed, people can teach you how to do different things, and what people have to realize when people are autistic is that they learn different things different ways. I could have three people that are autistic in the same room, and tell them that I'm going to teach them For example how to wash dishes or how to vacuum the carpets, or how to do some menial task that we all take for granted. I tell person one person two and person three that I'm going to teach them how. I give them a vacuum cleaner for example, and Them to vacuum the rug, and some of them may not understand what that means, so I may have to show them, or explain how that's done. once they get that skill, and they understand what they're supposed to do with it, person one and person two may vacuum the rug a little bit different than person 3, but they get the job done, because they figure out how after a lot of hard work to do it the way they think is appropriate. person one person two and person three vacuum the rug, but the way they go about it is totally different which is OK, so long as what they're doing makes sense to them, and they might do things in order, in that order makes sense to them, and if you mix up that order, is what happens is they breakdown because they are in a different position or in a different Situation, and it changes everything they know about how they do things. that is why it is important that people have Autism do it the way they learn best. sometimes you have to Have routines, and that is the most important thing period if you know your routine and you do things the same way the same time of day, With the same equipment, then you learn that that is the way it's done. then you learn that you can change the way that you do things and it's not that big of a deal, and you learn how to be able to deal with each situation. once you learn that you can change the change the way you do things and it's not gonna make a big difference, because you may change the fact that you might vacuum the floor one way going down  one day, and then turn around and vacuum the floor going the other direction all the way up the other day, you realize that there is no difference because the job still gets done you just start at one end of the hallway one day and the other end at the other day. some people have a heck of a time with this.

I gotta say I am very proud of you: you have taken the bull by the horns and decided that this is the way you are gonna deal with your incontinence. You have made the necessary decisions that you think earn your best interest, and you also understand that wearing diapers gives you the security that you need, and because of the feel of the diapers, that gives you the sensory Response that you need. the good thing is that diapers do serve a purpose in both of our situations, and I'm very proud of you that you are able to look the thing in the eye and go I wear diapers, I have incontinence, but it doesn't have me and I'm not afraid of it! because you have made the necessary changes to make easier for yourself, and you accept the reality that you're dealing with, it's a heck of a lot easier to be able to deal with, and as time progresses you won't even think twice: you will wet your diaper, you will know that you did it, and you will make the necessary decision Decision of when and where you think you need to change it. as long as your incontinence does not have you and you have it by the collar, you are the one who is in control of this, even when your incontinence may be the thing that you may not have control of, meaning that if you have to go, you may not have control of when or where that happens, but you got this thing by the collar because you know how you were going to deal with it and you deal with it in an eloquent manner.

*********HUGS********

The thing is we have incontinence, but we also have it by the collar, it may decide when it will show its ugly head, or what will be released, but we're still the ones making the necessary decisions that are in our best interests so that we can enjoy it even if we have to endure it!

Brian

 

 

[Kawaharu]

On 11/13/2022 at 12:13 AM, Enthusi said:

So I realize my story is a bit different in that I was an ABDL who untrained.  But these days I am as diaper dependent as anyone who wears them for medical reasons. 

Over the years I’ve been in all sorts of potentially compromising situations related to being incontinent. This includes getting flagged in airport security resulting in pat downs. I’ve gone to dozens of doctors appointments over the years,  some of which required stripping down to my diaper.  I’ve had had my diaper bag searched at amusement parks and sporting events more time than I can count. I usually buy baggy pants which I take to a tailor with the request to hide the diaper bulge as much as possible. One time I left my work bag somewhere and I got a call saying they found it and identified it as mine because they opened it up and found my name on a some documents, which means they would have also seen the spare diaper I keep in there. I have no hesitation about walking into a pharmacy to buy adult diapers for me to use while at the gym. I usually crinkle when I walk. A few times a year I experience a bad leak when out and about, which aren’t always possible to completely hide. Everyone in my immediate family knows I wear diapers.  Heck one time I fell asleep on a bench at the airport during a layover and upon waking up I realized the back of my shirt had gotten tucked into my diaper.  

So you would think by now someone somewhere would snicker at me or make an offhand comment of some sort. But it just hasn’t happened.  Most people couldn’t care less and act super cool and professional about it.  
In fact because no one in seems to notice or care that I wear diapers, I have become less guarded and nonchalant about them, such as when I go to change in a bathroom stall.  I’ve walked into a crowded bathroom with a clean diaper in my hand…  Rip rip rip rip crinkle crinkle, rip rip rip rip.  I step out of the stall and chuck the old diaper into the trash next to the sink, wash my hands and be on my way.  And STILL nobody has said anything to me. 

Not that I’m complaining…

Heck, being an adult baby, I know I am not ashamed or embarrassed for being in diapers. I'm not even humiliated for being in diapers because they help me deal with being incontinent. Being kept in diapers, permanently for medical reasons, has made my life much easier for me. Even my family knows I am incontinent and I am an adult baby. They are even comfortable with me being an adult baby and treating me as an adult baby instead of an adult. Being an adult baby and incontinent, I am use to stripping down to my diaper and being looked at by medical staff. I'm use to being seen in just a diaper and a t-shirt or onesie on. I'm use to being diapered so much that no one bats an eye anymore.

[Enthusi]

@BabyBoi91  I totally get where you’re coming from, and the last thing I want to do is trivialize a horrifically stigmatizing condition. 
 

Though I think you might have misinterpreted my title. Or perhaps I should’ve worded it better.  

Either way, what I was getting at is that I’m genuinely surprised it hasn’t caused me more problems. As my bladder control worsened to the point where I need to wear diapers, I expected to encounter shame and embarrassment, and social stigma from others. 

And while it may come off as me bragging I assure you that’s not the case. Yes I’m relatively young, but I am not that young. Plus it’s been a few years and there have been PLENTY of times where I had to wear to doctors appointments or while traveling and I’ve had my diaper bag searched too many times to count.   Each and every time I brace for the worst. But it turns out okay each and every time.    That’s what I was getting at.  

[Goerge]

I don't feel embarrassed either. I live in a group home so can't hide wearing nappies 24/7.

[Babypants]

I have a house on a corner lot, with no fencing.  There is a highly visible clothes line in the backyard, and weather permitting, I hang my cloth diapers out to dry.  This is typically twice a week.  I have been doing this for over 35 years, and in all of that time only one neighbor has ever broached the issue-- an elderly gentleman who wanted to know the pros and cons of cloth versus disposables.  Obviously, most if not all of my neighbors know that I am diapered, but no one cares.  My sense is that if you don't treat incontinence as a big deal, no one else will.  And to put this in perspective, let me simply offer by way of comparison the more than 200 sciatica attacks that I have experienced, and the cancer treatments that several of my neighbors and two of my wives have endured (I'm twice widowed).   

On 11/23/2022 at 4:46 PM, BabyBoi91 said:

I will say your title comes off as a little tone deaf. ? (no, I’m not shaming you. I’m just giving some feedback to a friend ?)

I think incontinence, urinary and especially fecal incontinence, can be very anxiety provoking / shame inducing for some people.  So saying, “I’m still waiting for it to cause me shame or embarrassment…” may make a lot of eye rolls . 
 

like, “well, someone is young, inexperienced, and/or thinks they’re invulnerable to fate and time…” 

****

Just to play devil’s advocate (warning: potential triggers below)…. 

What if you were fired from your job because they downsized, and you had also begun to develop bowel incontinence  regularly (especially fecal stress incontinence)… and sure you can take pills for the smell . But they can interact with other meds and don’t really make the smell go away; for some people they don’t work at all. 
 

And what happens when you go for new job interviews? Are you doing bowel preps every single day, maybe 2, and hoping you got everything ? Hoping you don’t defecate mid interview ? Or do you just wing it and hope fate is nice to you?—cu l you know if your bowels release everything mid interview because you sneeze, everyone there is gonna know you shit yourself. And while ADA is a thing…you still have to be able to do your job and they may consider “pooping yourself uncontrollably in front of people” unable to do the task you need to do. Harsh, but quite possible.
 

not to mention, say you manage to get the job… you still have to go to work, but your urinary incontinence has progressed to bowel incontinence due to years of pelvic floor weakness. How is this gonna affect you? Are you just doing daily bowel irrigation? Which is going to destroy your peristalsis—you will basically be doing bowel irrigation for life—or are you just letting yourself crap yourself at work: which you have no clue when it will happen, who with / in front of. 

what if your sensation decreases and you stop noticing how wet something or you’re unable to detect leaks? Sure, changing on a set schedule is a good solution, but sometimes even those fail and you have a massive wet spot on your butt and the whole office sees it but you don’t even know it.
 

 

It has been my experience that activated charcoal, taken daily as instructed, will eliminate the smell.  But as always, if you are taking other medicines, either prescription or OTC, you should consult with your physician before doing this.  It might also prove useful to consult with a dietician experienced in this area. I stay away from foods that are slow to digest and produce hard, compacted stool because I'm prone to pudendal nerve entrapment as well as IBS.

[Kawaharu]

23 hours ago, Babypants said:

I have a house on a corner lot, with no fencing.  There is a highly visible clothes line in the backyard, and weather permitting, I hang my cloth diapers out to dry.  This is typically twice a week.  I have been doing this for over 35 years, and in all of that time only one neighbor has ever broached the issue-- an elderly gentleman who wanted to know the pros and cons of cloth versus disposables.  Obviously, most if not all of my neighbors know that I am diapered, but no one cares.  My sense is that if you don't treat incontinence as a big deal, no one else will. 

That's like that where I live as well. I have neighbors that knows I am diapered and lucky I have a neighbor who's a nurse practitioner. She knows I am diapered and is totally okay with me being diapered around the neighborhood. She even diaper checks me and many times offers to diaper change me, which I am okay with and I let her do all the time. Even my neighbor knows I am an adult baby and she's totally accepting and totally understanding.

[Babypants]

You are fortunate to have neighbors who are not only understanding but willing to help.  Trust me, changing your own diapers during the course of a sciatica episode can be really bad news.  But all of my neighbors are also in their seventies, and without exception have medical issues of their own that make mine seem trivial by comparison,  Keeping things in perspective is one of the keys to enjoying life's daily opportunities to the full.

[Kawaharu]

7 hours ago, Babypants said:

You are fortunate to have neighbors who are not only understanding but willing to help.  Trust me, changing your own diapers during the course of a sciatica episode can be really bad news.  But all of my neighbors are also in their seventies, and without exception have medical issues of their own that make mine seem trivial by comparison,  Keeping things in perspective is one of the keys to enjoying life's daily opportunities to the full.

I am fortunate to have neighbors who understand, support and accept me being diapered and being an adult baby. They help me with diaper check and diaper changes and even are okay with me being diapered around the neighborhood.

[stevewet]

I don't feel any shame or embarrassment about my need for nappies 

[Kawaharu]

20 hours ago, stevewet said:

I don't feel any shame or embarrassment about my need for nappies 

I'm the same way as well. I don't feel any shame, embarrassment or fear about my need to be kept in diapers. I know I need them and I know I belong in them. I know I am never ever getting out of them and I know potty training is never ever gona happen for me. It's why I am not scared about being diapered. Even being diapered in front of people, I am so use to it and it feels normal for me. It's why for me, being in just a diaper, t-shirt or onesie on is so normal for me.

[messybutt2]

Although I'm not incontinent there are days my bladder just doesn't hold up like it used to , I'm only 37 and I'm normally always in diapers by choice as I'm a truck driver and it helps with driving . I've often wondered if my use of diapers almost 24/7 could be the issue or reason because of it. I do enjoy my diapers but ik most people or rather I've heard that most people that are incontinent have their days that they wish they didn't need them. 

[ken2988]

There are a lot of days when I wish that I wasn't incontinent, but I really do not have much of a choice, and they only remedy is to wearing diapers 24/7.  There is no doubt that wearing diapers 24/7 accelerates you incontinence since you learn to allow yourself to pee as soon as you feel any pressure in your bladder instead of trying to hold back the pee.  The lack of control leads to your sphincter muscles (the muscle that holds back pee) getting weaker.