BabyBoi91

I have come to realize the Internet is filled with trolls who simply want to ruin anyone’s day, and “experts” who want to argue everything and immediately say why someone is wrong. I believe these kinds of people also don’t really live much outside the Internet, or if they do, they don’t function all that well with others. So, I’ve learned to stop taking anything on the Internet personally, and if someone does start personal attacks or just is outright rude, then I will be quick to ignore and move on. It’s not their fault they act this way, and these people aren’t even worth my emotional energy. That said, I think a lot of people simply “want to believe” whatever they want to believe. How many posts can you find (even here) with people extremely certain that “wearing diapers 24/7 won’t make you incontinent, just like wearing underwear won’t make you continent”? Peer reviewed journals already show us that’s not necessarily true. On the same token, people also have difficulty thinking beyond black and white. Either you “are” or “are not” continent. When really, medical specialists intentionally use scales to assess “levels of continence.” It’s not black and white. Lastly, it’s a common phenomenon that people can get angry if they see people happy with something they don’t like, don’t understand, or can’t have. So, they immediately piss in someone else’s cereal. It sounds like this is happening to you. And yes, I recently had the experience (not ABDL related) of talking to a doctor and learning that something I thought was normal my entire life was actually atypical. But when it’s your body and it’s how it works since you were a small child, you assume it’s just normal.

I would say the number one issue with pads is placement/moving, and “direction of flow” (especially with males. They also tend to be poor while sleeping unless it is extremely light and you barely move in your sleep. have you considered using an adult pull-up style “pad”? Like depends has pretty discreet products (they are pretty lightweight tho and usually need to be changed after one wetting which you describe you prefer. They also don’t handle flooding well). Other brands, especially ones with leg guards do better. another option would be to vary your diaper options. Maybe use your current diapers for nighttime / when itay be awhile before u can change, and find a thinner diaper for daytime use / when you know you can easily change. I know some people have talked about having 3 options: nighttime/extended use, standard daytime, and quick use / exercising. but I agree with those above. Find options that work for you. And if diapers are a problem (like you really don’t want to wear and wish you wet less), see a doctor about different ways to help.

When it comes to procedures, I would personally trust the advice of a urologist over a continence nurse for most things. The continence nurse may have experience dealing with patients in recovery/post-surgery, but a urologist is gonna have a much deeper understanding of your body’s needs , ability to discuss benefits and risks, and is medically licensed to actually give treatment overall. if anything, I would compare with a second opinion from a second urologist if you’re concerned (ideally a different practice, but doesn’t have to be, especially if they’re all independently hired by the hospital). That’s totally reasonable when considering a procedure or surgery to get a consult from a non-operating surgeon. Also, doctors not communicating well with nurses is a tale as old as time. Likely he expects then to read visit notes, or if she is in a different system, there may be privacy issues and paperwork missing, who knows. but it’s pretty common.

So, your end question is really medical and should probably be asked to a doctor—more specifically a different urologist or your primary care doctor if they know the answer. Some option: get a second opinion, or request a new urologist. Maybe ask your primary care doc about this. another option: Most hospitals have some kind of “patient advocate” or “patient liaison” system where patients who feel their doctors aren’t communicating well or aren’t listening to them / their questions can talk to someone and get help with their doctors . They do a lot. Mostly because if doctors write these people off, they can often get in trouble from higher up. And even if your urologist is “top dog” in his department, there is always someone above him, lol. Always. These are just ideas though. Regardless, I’m sorry that your relationship with your doctor doesn’t seem that great. Not your fault; he sounds like a “stereotypical surgeon” and may not always be the best at empathy or may get easily frustrated when he can’t just insta-fix something with surgery. Who knows. Hope things improve.

My issue with NRUs is I find they don’t wick moisture away as well as Northshore. while I’m all for trying new things, I find Northshore MegaMax is one of the best for capacity AND wicking—which keeps my skin dry and prevents a rash. some of the newer diapers that boast larger capacities keep the moisture right on my skin, which really irritates it. It could also be a sizing issue. North shore diapers run big for their size, so it gives a little air between the skin and diaper. so for me, it’s not about capacity so much about time until skin irritation. There are some diapers with massive capacity that I have to change after 3 hours due to skin irritation.

I think for I was once at a point where I was “seeing myself as incontinent,” but I think even that was a form of denial (about what I wanted and about where I really was at). now it’s about accepting that I really am incontinent (bladder and bowel), and I just need to not fight it, and work on managing it well.

I will say your title comes off as a little tone deaf. ? (no, I’m not shaming you. I’m just giving some feedback to a friend ?) I think incontinence, urinary and especially fecal incontinence, can be very anxiety provoking / shame inducing for some people. So saying, “I’m still waiting for it to cause me shame or embarrassment…” may make a lot of eye rolls . like, “well, someone is young, inexperienced, and/or thinks they’re invulnerable to fate and time…” **** Just to play devil’s advocate (warning: potential triggers below)…. What if you were fired from your job because they downsized, and you had also begun to develop bowel incontinence regularly (especially fecal stress incontinence)… and sure you can take pills for the smell . But they can interact with other meds and don’t really make the smell go away; for some people they don’t work at all. And what happens when you go for new job interviews? Are you doing bowel preps every single day, maybe 2, and hoping you got everything ? Hoping you don’t defecate mid interview ? Or do you just wing it and hope fate is nice to you?—cu l you know if your bowels release everything mid interview because you sneeze, everyone there is gonna know you shit yourself. And while ADA is a thing…you still have to be able to do your job and they may consider “pooping yourself uncontrollably in front of people” unable to do the task you need to do. Harsh, but quite possible. not to mention, say you manage to get the job… you still have to go to work, but your urinary incontinence has progressed to bowel incontinence due to years of pelvic floor weakness. How is this gonna affect you? Are you just doing daily bowel irrigation? Which is going to destroy your peristalsis—you will basically be doing bowel irrigation for life—or are you just letting yourself crap yourself at work: which you have no clue when it will happen, who with / in front of. what if your sensation decreases and you stop noticing how wet something or you’re unable to detect leaks? Sure, changing on a set schedule is a good solution, but sometimes even those fail and you have a massive wet spot on your butt and the whole office sees it but you don’t even know it. and don’t forget the flatulence ! That seeps out now too. It’s sometimes really loud and embarrassing and you have control of that either , and it smellla horrible. **** I’m not saying don’t enjoy your life and don’t be your best self. I’m just questioning if whether it may be better to sometimes walk our lives with some humility. If not for our benefit, then for the benefit of those with whom we walk alongside. For many people, sudden onset of incontinence robs them of their sense of self. For others, becoming incontinence helps them find their whole sense of self. but I think both sides can have to face issues of shame or anxiety. To write them off, I believe, is just asking to be blindsided.

Yes, obesity and DM2 are the biggest culprits with adult incontinence. as far as potty training, parents in the 2020s are potty training earlier than they were 10 years ago in the US. The average age a child becomes potty trained is now 2.5 years old . The average age of starting potty training (again, average) is shortly after turning age 2. this is in contrast to the 2000s / 2010 time when the average age of potty training was age 3 or higher. and in the 80s, it was not uncommon for children to be potty trained in their late 3s or early 4s. So while people may think that disposables “make parents lazier” or somehow disincentivize toilet training. The decrease in age over time doesn’t support that. And while some people brag about toilet training at 18 months, toilet training too early can actually be quite harmful as it can lead to urinary / fecal retention. Ironically , toilet training Too Early actually has a high risk of childhood incontinence due to instilling behaviors that lead to retention (and retention can often lead to incontinence in children).

Some of this has been echoed above, but i would say: 1) having an understanding of oneself that this is what you really want and it’s ok if this takes time. Heck part of the process imo is this understanding crystallizing. But I think that many of us agree that the biggest hang ups are mental. And I think many of those “mental barriers” go away once you realize: “No, this is right for me. This is what I want. I know this.” fantasy is fun and has its place, absolutely. And desire also plays a role in our lives. But once you have that level of “clarity” about wanting change, then I the change can happen rather quickly, because the mind and body are ready.

Please ignore this person . He is giving actually dangerous advice . do NOT ever take activated charcoal without the direct supervision and instruction of a doctor, especially if you have other health conditions or take other medications as activated Charcoal can neutralize certain vital medications and/or cause life-threatening electrolyte imbalances. this person is NOT qualified to give any kind of medical advice and has admitted before that they are NOT a health care professional of any kind. I usually leave this guy on ignore cuz he’s a fraudster, but he’s starting to give life threatening advice again .

Yeah, I agree that having a trash bin is very helpful for handicap stalls. I’m guessing for some places its less practical. also, no clue why some other responder is shouting all-caps at “people on this site”… ?‍♂️

So these actually do work pretty well. So do just basic “disposable underwear” Either way, the effect is completely unnoticeable in certain types of garments — especially jeans . if it’s more you don’t like the feeling yourself, then that may be different , but again you may find that denim holds everything snug . jsut an idea for if you don’t want the bulk of a diaper (personally I would probably just use the disposable underwear but the inserts may be cheaper .

Tbh , from my perspective, the person you are referring to may have a history of giving “expert advice” and sometimes even [very incorrect] “medical advice” about things he maybe shouldn’t be giving advice on. He has acknowledged that he does not have any medical or psychological expertise, but is eloquent and frequently works in jargon to sound like he does, imo. I feel like his posts would be better suited if they were merely sharing his own experiences and not always telling people what to do. Sometimes he has even given people dangerous health advice in my opinion, so as someone who is a health professional, I usually remind people, “Please be careful about following advice on the Internet.” To reference OP, I think you’re doing a great job. You may not even have to drink a “ton” of water , although early on it can certainly give you more opportunities to wet. The best thing you said is that you “try to relax and let it flow”—that’s great! One of the biggest parts of untraining is getting to a point where you aren’t focused on untraining, where you accept that your body will just do relax / release when it needs to. ?

Yes, over time if you intentionally “disuse” muscles involved in bladder control, then you can develop bowel weakness as well. This is due to some (not all) of the pelvic floor muscles being involved in both. after about 3+ years of urinary incontinence , I began having occasional bowel accidents as well—usually more stress incontinence to begin with. It was a little unnerving at first but I eventually accepted it and am fine with it now. when I talked with my doctor about it, he said it definitively can happen this way.

I think everyone approaches hypnosis differently, but everyone can be hypnotized. if you’re looking for specific suggestions, Champtehotter has lots of content on his Patreon (some is also on WMM). On WMM, there are several good creators like sweetdreamshypno, MindMaster, and EMG. For prerecorded content, it can be difficult to find a creator that you really like and also content that matches very closely with your goals. You can sometimes use editors to help take out sections you don’t want, but this doesn’t always work. as far as the actual approach, I don’t think there is one “right answer.” Some people may prefer to focus on regression or age play aspects of using their diapers, while others may prefer to just focus on incontinence—I fall mostly in the latter category but I’ve had success with both. if you can afford a few sessions with an erotic hypnotherapist who has experience with ABDL goals, I highly recommend that route as several people here have had success working directly with a hypnotherapist.