Bad Jokes

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Why did the ancient Near Easterners write only consonants?

 

Because they had not yet learned to control their vowels

[ValentinesStuff]

13 minutes ago, Little Christine said:

Why did the ancient Near Easterners write only consonants?

 

Because they had not yet learned to control their vowels

Dd thy wr dprs?

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Got me; have it ywh

[BabyJune]

A blonde went to see the Gulf of Mexico and asked if Jack Niclaus would be playing in the tournament that day.

[vvp39]

No doubt she drove her Golf....

[square_duck]

I spotted a rare albino Cheetah....it was the least I could do..... ??

[Firefly 35]

12 hours ago, square_duck said:

I spotted a rare albino Cheetah....it was the least I could do..... ??

What color(s)?

[square_duck]

Polka dot colors... ?

[dyperbole]

My grandfather was responsible for 36 downed planes in World War II.

He was the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.

[oznl]

21 minutes ago, dyperbole said:

My grandfather was responsible for 36 downed planes in World War II.

He was the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.

I want to die like my grandfather, peacefully in my sleep, not die screaming in terror like his passengers did...

[Firefly 35]

2 hours ago, oznl said:

I want to die like my grandfather, peacefully in my sleep, not die screaming in terror like his passengers did...

Luftwaffe pilots: "WHY DID YOU REPLACE ALL THE GEARS WITH WAFFLES?!"

[ValentinesStuff]

1 hour ago, Firefly 35 said:

Luftwaffe pilots: "WHY DID YOU REPLACE ALL THE GEARS WITH WAFFLES?!"

Was he syruptitious about doing that?

[rusty pins]

No, just plane nuts!

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

15 hours ago, Firefly 35 said:

Luftwaffe pilots: "WHY DID YOU REPLACE ALL THE GEARS WITH WAFFLES?!"

Mechanics: Because we are Belgian

[Crinklz Kat]

5 hours ago, Little Christine said:

Mechanics: Because we are Belgian

Spoken in "Belch".

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Yes my Liege

[square_duck]

Belchin' spoken in most European bars and pubs..

 

[ValentinesStuff]

6 hours ago, square_duck said:

Belchin' spoken in most European bars and pubs..

 

And Loos, where most people are European, the others are Europoopin.

[dyperbole]

4 hours ago, ValentinesStuff said:

And Loos, where most people are European, the others are Europoopin.

Initially misread that as Laos.  Apparently I have Laos-sy eyesight.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

How Laos-y is it?

[square_duck]

"Hey laos-yyyy. I'm home!!"

[rusty pins]

Makes me wonder if the old song "Skip To My Loo" has it's origins with bathrooms!  Could it have been a way for parents toilet training their kids to try and make it fun to go to the bathroom?  Instead of just walking to the potty when they had to go, the skip to it singing a little song.  Maybe to help reinforce to a kid that they are a big boy or girl and they are telling everyone they are going to use the potty instead of going in their diapers or pants.  Now, "Skip to my loo my darling" makes me wonder!  Is that where Mommy/Wife has the changing table when husband needs his diaper changed?  "Skip to my loo my darling and I'll get that wet diaper of yours changed!"

[ValentinesStuff]

 

I think I'll drop the "to," and just skip the loo.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

When I have to clean my fully fixtured bathroom I always dress as Napoleon* because I am about to meet my water loo

 

*Although I woud feel more at home dressed as Josephine, but we will not talk about that here

 

To which I added a 4th verse

Now in England, one time I chanced to be
And I had to go take a wicked pee
But there weren't not a dang flush john in sight
So I started askin' people left ant right
Waterloo, Waterloo, where can I find a water loo?
Cuz this puppy has to go so dang bad so let me  know?
Can you tell me where to find a water loo?

[square_duck]

I think I have a waterloo in the bathroom..... Don't use it much though....I feel defeated...