Idzy

These days, this may be the best course of action. Any soft-skills, such as written and verbal communication, networking, and just general maturity and common sense will play a big part in how rapidly you progress in a new field or career. Unfortunately, it seems that automation and technology is supplanting so many previously "stable" jobs and careers that there doesn't need to be a "robot uprising" to greatly affect the quality of life for much of humanity, and not in a good way. I wish you all the best in your search for gainful employment, and salute you for your persistence in the face of hardship, in that you're not giving up, nor giving up hope. You will find something, but don't rule out a change of career, even if it means setting a lifetime's worth of experience aside and starting afresh. Even if it's just temporary whilst you still look for work in your field of expertise, any income is better than no income.

As someone who now works in the financial services industry, credit card debt is an awful thing, as is PayPal (who somehow established themselves as "Not a Bank™"), without any regulatory body caring. Having PayPal as your primary source of revenue, unless you do extremely high volumes and can take the odd whack is extremely risky, as PayPal will almost universally resolve all disputes in the purchaser's favor, with sometimes devastating consequences to the seller. So expect this, and ensure that you positively never screw anything up, OR charge a premium for PayPal over direct credit card payments via a merchant service. (Their terms and conditions prohibit this, however it is unenforceable if done transparently at the time the payment method is selected) On my other point, the interest rates charged on credit cards should be criminal, however it is based based on an an unsecured loan that could be lost at any second. They make up for this with extortionate interest rates, fully expecting a certain percentage of defaults. It's just a mathematical formula to them. If you happen to be in serious credit card debt, see a debt consolidation advisor immediately, this will often reduce the interest rate by over 50%, however you will lose the freedom to make new purchases on borrowed money. Work out if you can afford this practically before doing such a thing. Credit cards have seen a lot of people through tough times, and can be repaid once your life is back on track. There is nothing inherently wrong, or evil about them, they are what they are, and you know what you're signing up for. They're a tool, and you can use them properly or improperly. Let me also assure you that there are no "get rich quick" schemes offered to the general public, the only person who may "get rich quick" is the person or people who invented the scheme, so please save yourself the heartache of finding that out the hard way. Collections of commodity items (such as cards - regardless of how "rare" they are) generally don't appreciate in value at all, and if so, do not do so sufficiently quickly so as to make a substantial profit in one's lifetime for it to be a worthwhile investment. If you're looking for an investment, simply buy the Dow Jones index, which has shown consistent average growth over the long term. Unfortunately, there is no substitute for hard and smart work. Always look for a position which maximizes your remuneration, and try to save. Even it's a simple regime of $20 per week, this will add up quickly, and give you a buffer against hard times, and a sense of financial security and control. I know this may sound obvious, but always pay off the debt which attracts the highest rate of interest first, and proactively negotiate payment plans with larger entities such as the IRS or Medical Providers. My final piece of advice is, do NOT try to start your own business when in this position. Starting a new business is risky enough on it's own, requires capital and an extremely comprehensive knowledge of a particular market. Find the best job you can, and work hard, but work smart. Take the best remuneration you can, and exercise some self-denial in terms of consumer goods for a while. You can and will beat this, and when you do, you'll come out of it with so much more confidence and self-respect.

I can certainly agree that the so called "War" on drugs has been a monumental failure. I am sincerely sorry for the situation you are in, whilst in no way comparable to your situation, aside from an accident as a child, I also broke my leg a few years ago, and was prescribed woefully inadequate pain management medication, resulting in many pain-induced falls, and months off work which I could not afford. Unfortunately, after exhausting all other options, and placed on a 9 month waiting list for a specialist pain management clinic, I was forced to turn to the black market to obtain painkillers. Bear in mind, this was for a completely legitimate purpose (largely to enable me to return to work), and put an otherwise law abiding citizen in the way of drug dealers and other hardened criminals, opened me up to the risk of adulterated product, as well as risking a felony charge every time I bought the stuff. Fortunately, after around 6 months the pain abated, and I slowly reduced the dose until I no longer needed it. 3 months later, my appointment at the pain management clinic is due, which I attended out of sheer spite. After enduring a lecture about all the "alternate" methods of managing pain (mind over matter stuff, for people wanting to reduce their use of pain medications), I actually put my hand up and asked "Out of everyone sitting here today, who wishes to reduce the amount of pain medication they are taking, and who is here to receive their first dose of anything to remediate chronic, debilitating pain, yet is not able to obtain any via any other method". As you can imagine, zero people answered to my first question, and the room was abuzz with discussion after my second point. Either way, after seeing the doctor and explaining that due to the waiting period, I was no longer in need of pain medication, as my injury had healed sufficiently. To my complete dismay, I walked away with more prescriptions for opiates than I thought it was legal go give to a single person, despite explicitly stating that I no longer needed it ("just in case"). The world is a screwed up place sometimes. But denying painkillers to those who are in genuine need of it is one of the cruelest things our society can do to people. I wasn't trying to get high, just be capable of walking. Whilst my original comment was in the context of depression, nonetheless, it still applies equally if you're in chronic pain. After all, depression is just a different kind of chronic pain. You never know what the future holds, whether it be a scientific breakthrough in treating your illusive disease, or your body simply recovering on it's own. I'm not a doctor, nor a strong advocate for medical marijuana (I have a terrible reaction to it), however I have heard that it has brought immense relief to others. Perhaps this may be an option worth exploring to improve your quality of life.

Honestly, there shouldn't need to be some sort of "protocol" for engaging someone who is interested in the same product you are. If you were buying a TV or a Hi-Fi, would you have any trouble discussing the pros and cons of different products with them? Those who are medically incontinent are generally very thick skinned about their problem, and usually if you're looking at them, it's likely you either share a need for them, or are doing so for fun. Neither of those will create hostility. I don't know of anyone who has no interest in Adult Diapers just randomly sauntering up to the isle where they're located and taking a good look for no reason. Just like any other product, the feedback of others who've either used them or are considering using them is invaluable. Just be polite, discrete and understanding. Exactly like you would want others to treat you.

OK well there doesn't seem to be any interest in this, so unless you message me on Kik "Idzy84", reply to this thread or message me privately on here, I'd consider this a failed attempt, and we'll try again next year. I really wouldn't want anyone to show up and find themselves alone.

Totally agree. The man was a true champion for our culture, and without his tireless efforts, those of us over 30 would have needed to wait another 10 years to realize we weren't alone. He had a heart of gold and was courageous enough to serve as a good ambassador for all of us, long before the world became accepting of anything which deviated from the mainstream. The website was passed on to someone else, I forget who that was, but the original diaperpailfriends.com domain expired long before abyclub.com. I first found the website at 13, and the profound sense of relief that I was "not alone" is one of the most vivid memories I have to this day. Tommy is certainly a man (or maybe a baby boy) who deserves to be remembered. As far as I know, he's the one who started to bring us together, whether by his publications or via the internet. An inspiration for everything which came afterwards.

Is anyone up for another one? The venue is great, but coming up to Christmas, everyone is frantic and has commitments, but d'you think we could squeeze one last Melbourne meetup in for 2019? Just to give people ample notice, is anyone interested in a meetup either December 7th or 14th at Flagstaff Gardens?

This isn't one of those "don't give up, things will get better posts" there are enough of those and they do a lot of good... But most important is Don't Die. Stay alive. Even if you've got no reason to right now, just stay alive. There's a reason you're still here, you might not know it, but there is. You don't have to wake up tomorrow with all the answers, nor do you have to wake up at all, stay in bed all day. Just don't die! you'd be surprised just how important that is

I do not equate Jehovah's Witnesses with Christianity. I'm a proud monotheist, and a Christian believer, however belong to no organized religion. For me, it is not a matter of coping, but a matter of the most logical answer to our origins. Unfortunately, my work as a scientist and an engineer leads me to believe that Darwinian evolution, as defined in it's canonical text "Origin of the Species" is by it's own criteria invalidated. There are not many alternatives, however as a designer myself, I have a tremendous amount of respect for the design which has been put into our universe, from the vast expanses of space, to the microscopic complexities of the flora and fauna which flourish on our planet. I'm not one to pass moral judgement upon anyone, I am more than content with my beliefs, and will discuss them with anyone who asks. But if you don't ask, it's not a topic I discuss. With regard to the Jehovah's Witnesses religion, I have seen the systematic "disconnection" between family and friends to be immensely destructive.

The most constructive suggestion I could give if you really do want to quit would be to try and strip it back to the bare minimum, and remove as many pleasurable elements from the experience as possible. e.g. no ABDL style products, a purely clinical approach to incontinence, change frequently, no enjoying the warm feeling for any longer than is strictly necessary to deal with the lack of control, and possibly reverting to a pull-up style protective undergarment (notice I'm not even calling them diapers any more) and using the potty whenever possible. This may remove the pleasurable triggers which keep you "addicted" so to speak. Try anti bed-wetting medications, and just adopt an attitude that it is purely a disability that you need to overcome. Try and make it as dis-pleasurable as possible. If you really want to be hard-core about it, you could consider switching to a condom style catheter (or urine collection device) and a bag, which will provide a similar, if not superior level of protection to a diaper, but without any of the subconscious associations or triggers associated with diapers. I really hate to be giving advice on stopping something that you love and brings you comfort and security, but if you've decided that pragmatically it is the most appropriate thing to do right now (you can always to back to wearing diapers, when circumstances are more conducive to it), then this is the best I can think of. This is how I managed to quit smoking, by forcing myself to smoke the most offensive tasting, menthol cigarettes, and that was all I allowed myself. I gave up within a week.

Privacy is dead, If you even have a Facebook account, it's already game over.

Who actually says that? Are they selling something, or just being melodramatic?

Rugrats... Favorite show as a 90s kid, and love Tommy Pickles as a character.

PLEASE don't. They'll rip you off sooner than you can say cat in the hat. Understand investing for yourself, don't trust some dickhead off the street with your money. I mean this with the utmost of sincerity, as I work in that industry. Personally, I give the best advice I can, and work hard for the prosperity of my clients. Most do not. They'll put you into risky funds, just so they can get the commission. If you ever win the lottery, just remember one thing "a fool and his / her money are quickly parted"

Tried that, the boredom kills you. I sold my previous company for a LOT of money, several times that of winning the lottery. At the end of the day, I just started a small business doing easy stuff, that I enjoy and isn't stressful. Gives me a purpose, and in an industry I love. It doesn't make much in the way of profits, but I don't need it.

Yeah, probably don't do that. I'm one of those people involved in investment banking and financial advice. Let me assure you, the industry does not have your best interests at heart. I'd recommend buying property with a high rental yield, or buying a broad index of stocks. Bank deposits are around 2%, so totally useless, and you've got to be a sophisticated investor to do better in the immediate short term. There are lots of funds offering 6 to 8 percent, but if you read the fine print, they're risky as hell. That's not entirely true. If you're actually good at math and willing to take a huge risk. There are times where buying every combination of numbers (guaranteeing a win) will yield a profit, just so long as nobody else wins too... It'll cost you a lot (millions) for the ticket, but you are guaranteed to win, only problem is if someone else chances it too. Gambling winnings are not taxed in Australia, I'm not sure about the US. Make sure to take any taxes into account if attempting an arbitrage win.

Yeah. I'm sometimes in diapers and sometimes not. I really don't care any more, if i wake up mid stream or wake up bursting to go, I'm gonna wet the bed. I kinda enjoy it, so it's not a big deal for me, and for anyone else, i just tell them i've wet the bed my whole life (which isn't a lie).

I let the hotel know just out of courtesy as I rarely leak. In a lot of cases they tell me quietly that all beds are protected. But still, it can't hurt to tell them that you "sometimes" wet the bed. At least you won't get any bills later on.

Lets both be grateful for understanding wives. My wife changes me, and has a good bedtime routine for me. I used to suffer from terrible insomnia, but not any more.

Whoa, you've been through a lot, I'm getting anxious just reading it. Best advice I can offer is to just chill for a bit, accept your desires, and play alone if needed. Forget what anyone says, just do what you want, and get a feel for it. There are LOTS of people just like you, and probably even more people who'd love to take care of you. But simply demanding that the universe gives you your ideal caretaker isn't realistic. It takes time and effort to get to know someone so intimately to share such a relationship. Be patient, and always on the look out. Reach out to people on forums like this, but you really need to make a close connection, which means that you've got to be willing to offer something to them. Be interested in their desires, and if they align with yours, then you've got a winner.

When i was 6 y/o i was involved in an industrial accident which left me incontinent, and without feeling in my lower extremities. As you get older, incontinence is actually a monumental inconvenience, and thankfully after high-school most people have the courtesy to treat you with sympathy and dignity. Only problem is, it still requires a lot of "baggage" You need to prepare, carry changes, wipes, know when you're likely to void, all kinds of nasty stuff. Point is though, if i can get through it and live a relatively normal life, so can you. If it's something that's foist on you by disability, or something you really really want to do. It's possible.

The thing is, do you really want to stop bed-wetting. I totally understand the psychological need to wear diapers, as for a lot of people it started way before puberty, perhaps just after you were potty trained. I was a late trainer prior to my accident, for possibly this reason. It's hard to think back and come to a conclusive answer. But this "desire" is more than a passing thing, and stays with you for life. So in my opinion, it is almost as much of a need as physical incontinence. Don't let my statements deter you, I'm just pointing out that having absolutely no control is inconvenient most of the time.

Personally, I find the extra warmth of premium diapers like the MegaMax to be quite pleasurable and comfortable at night, and pretty much put it down to what @oznl said, that the extra SAP and pulp hold it closer to your body as they swell. Is it something you find uncomfortable? or were just curious about? It still cools down fast enough, so I say enjoy it while it lasts and try to fall asleep before it gets cold

It is unfortunate, but there seems to be quite a dark side to this religion. I've met countless victims of their policies of "disconnection" of family members who leave the faith, the mysterious "watchtower society" in Brooklyn, NY which takes most of the money donated by church members, however doesn't disclose anything about what it spends it on. They also have quite strange views on the refusal of life-saving medical procedures, which are often enforced by parents on dying infants. I'm not an expert by any means, and do not want to vilify anyone, but I've met a lot of people who have been traumatized by their parents who practice this religion. It is entirely possible that they are all outliers, and that at it's core, the religion is sound, however it is something I'm genuinely afraid of after seeing the suffering caused to those who defect from it's ranks.

@oznl does a much better job of explaining it intuitively than I do. 1. There is no chemical reaction which could produce heat. 2. Keeping it close to your body will enhance the sensation of warmness, however never hotter than the point where it it was expelled from your body. I'd imagine that this is what most people (myself included) would want. I don't know whether the statement "chill out" is appropriate, but don't worry. It's perfectly safe, and been looked at by lots of highly skilled and well qualified scientists (even if it's made in China) to ensure it's safe. The team at North Shore aren't silly, and would never expose anyone to something dangerous. Just enjoy the warm feeling without worry, and relish a good night's sleep in warm nappies / diapers.