Kif

Okay this may be a bit of a weird question given the serious turn this story took, but has anyone else been imagining Clark as Walter White / Heisenberg throughout most of the story? ? Like...I knowwww he has been described with curly red/orange hair etc but...My head just GOES there and I have no guesses as to why...

Thank you for finding this!! I didn't know that this guy also had a giant Jeep too, it's just as imposing as the Hummer! 0_o; Also: Okay now it REALLY feels like some MistuhGwiffin* just GTA'd a car from some hapless Amazons *that's three Littles in a trench coat, as described in Unfair: A Diaper Dimension Novel

And in case the video gets taken down, here is a screenshot with somebody for scale:

Sounds good, really! Great job! ? I feel like I can directly relate, because I visited my family last year (big flight involved too) after I had just started untraining and instead of not wearing at all I "downgraded" to something else (heavy pads in undies, in my case; parents knew I was into nappies and I felt they might notice pullups). Fortunately I had my own hotel room so I was able to pack regular diapers for the week or so of my stay and not worry about disposal. That said, I was ready to come out and say I needed them at night since I'd had accidents already -- and considering I **did** have an accident at least one night there, that would have been the most mature/responsible thing to do anyway. Overall while it sucked being out of *full* diapers, it was still good because it acknowledged/respected that I had to feel I needed diapers (even if at that point, at best I wet at night sometimes or had mild urgency). It was sure better than completely stopping and going through that stress on top of the visit... And honestly...in the long term these are such extremely minor setbacks. Even my months-long interruption for surgery is minor compared to the years to be spent in diapers otherwise.

Totally!! That's awesome, and it absolutely counts for something imho. Whether that is a 'wet' night or not depends on how you count, but honestly I don't think it's worth worrying about...this sounds like, to me, what I went through before I was wetting completely subconsciously. When I experienced it I journaled/noted it, and eventually they increased until I had a completely unconscious wetting. I bet that if you keep it up, you'll experience wetting on the incon pad subconsciously too! Going to have to note this for myself, if I can manage it! (unfortunately share a bed so...)

I made mine using camping foam pads, foam glue, and PUL fabric. Used a knife to cut the bumpers from more foam pad. 100% not practical for being out-and-about (for that I use literally a single layer of PUL in a plastic bag; takes no space, is cute, and keeps my clothes off the floor), but it's a dream at home. Literally...Since it's camping foam you can actually fall asleep on it...which I diiiid today. ?

I know it's a tad off topic, but I second this! And, I hope to join the ranks of y'all with sustained 24/7 with a bit of trans representation ? I untrain for me and me alone, despite the naysaying, life changes, etc. BUT, not without feeling a tad bit alone in very specific and extremely relevant regards... There's so little info on folks that kept this up despite upcoming SRS, the feelings of conflict involved, having to stop untraining, manage those emotions on top of surgery emotions, and how it has even brought out my little side again to cope...It's complex, difficult, emotional, but rewarding...and I hope to shed some light on it for others in a similar position, to give them a cohesive and ongoing set of experiences. ❤️ (and while I won't say exactly what stage I'm at for privacy reasons, I'll just say that it's going well but will be awhile yet before I post, and I cannot wait to share how it has all gone! ?)

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you SO MUCH for these stories! I'm one of those people that gets anxious and I read some of the other darker stories and just...I'm just so happy to see a happy ending for once. And to not have the suffering dragged out and made so upsetting. Something safe and feel-good that didn't give me such dark scary feelings about my Little side. AND had trans characters I could relate to (and the protagonist at that! I LOVED that twist)! I'm just so grateful! I really needed this now in my life, and you story has moved me so much emotionally. Brought out things in me I'd pushed down and...Just thank you, so so much! ? F*** it, I have GOT to setup an ABDL Patreon account so I can support you with more than just words. You don't have these stories in print now, do you? Also DEFINITELY going to read those stories in order now, haha! Popped onto Love In Dimensions, saw the disclaimer and Rose Silva's illustration and yeeeeeeeep now I just have to go back and read it in order, see what connections and characters you draw up next. You are AWESOME, thank you so much!

Hehe, yep! Gosh I relate so hard to this, but I've been too squeamish to dump money into some premium diapers...so I stuck with cloth...but every day, I sweeear I'll just say f**k it and do it. I mean, I like how disposables feel anyway...But then exactly what you described will happen to me, lol. Thaaaat said, it would feel pretty neat knowing I need the diaper for the distance between bed and the shower despite the buyer's remorse ? For real though, I do agree in how it seems subconscious...there were soooo many cases where I reviewed my journals and wet nights, and there def was some connection for me between (low) mood and wet nights. Aaaaalso alcohol...I rarely drink, and everytime has been nearly a guarantee of waking up wet..

Ohhh wowwww, that's quite a thing to have thrusted in front of you. ? Sounds like you're taking it okay--hopefully it just gets brushed under the rug and that's that! I can definitely follow your line of logic -- nobody is going to look for evidence of diapers unprompted, but yeah if it comes up they may notice. Hopefully it doesn't come to that, and if it does hopefully you and your friend group take it well? I'd be a nervous wreck for dayyys, myself...seriously, kahunas to just analyzing it logically and at least projecting some kind of coolness around it...

Thanks a lot! I don't want to detract too much from Becca's thread, but I'll say you're 100% right on how importance acceptance is, and seeing how it fits into your life. Life adjustment and acceptance took the bulk of those 6 months for me (maybe for Becca too?), but once it's out of the way it's sooooo much easier to let the physical changes happen!

Congrats on 6 1/2 months! Aaaaas this is about where I had to put a pause on things, I can confirm that retraining at that point is possible. How you described your first day pretty accurately describes how it felt for me though I thiiink you were a bit more leaky than me haha. I'll look forward to following your progress! I wish I could keep up the same schedule but eh, I'll cheer you on from the sidelines! ?

This. All this. Have been a bit nervous to respond in this thread as a trans woman, this kind of stuff just gives me the heeby-jeebies and in my experience leads to a quick slippery slope. Assuming we're talking about somebody that wants GCS (again, just as much variety in the trans community y'all, not everyone wants surgery or hormones though many do), what has been said about medical costs following a "by choice" surgery can certainly be said of GCS too...Like, one couuuld say "oh, hormones are optional you could always stop them" before surgery, and then they have that surgery and now those hormones are necessary (for example in MtF, orchiectomy or vaginoplasty can remove the testes). Then, one could say "oh, now you've burdened us with supplying your hormones the rest of your life gahhh". But guess what happens with folks that are happy and have their needs met? They're productive members of society, they contribute, grow, live their lives, touch the lives of others in a good way. I think what a lot of this "cost of X" stuff on the individual misses is the benefit of just being able to live your life and contribute to society as a whole. Speaking of this personally...It removes the fog. I can do and be sooo much more than before, because I don't have this constant burden dragging me down. Yeah I have to take hormones every day and will have to for the rest of my life, yeah my body would be "mutilated" in the sense that I'll never reproduce normally...But I'm happy. Family and friends noticed how much more energy I had, how much more present I was. Coworkers noticed how much more productive I was. I started to aspire to do more in my free time than self-medicate to numb the pain, and contribute outside my sphere. It was all a net positive not just for me, but everyone else in my life I touched.

Congrats! Glad you're alright with all that is going on, and mad respect for helping out!

Ah cool! I don't like to use the salvedge edges typically, and I used terry instead of flannel. Could use the salvedge in this case, but the bolt is too wide so I don't. Ohhhh I looked up a hem and I see what you mean. I can see how that'd work, thanks for bringing it up! ?

Only caveat I have for this is without finishing the edges they'll unravel along the cut edge. Didn't mention it in my post, but I highly recommend a serger / overlock machine for that work. You can use a regular machine, but since it's not specialized in that kind of sewing then it can take 30-45 minutes to finish the edges of a single flat (assume you are doing its equivalent of overlock stitches). By contrast, I can push out one in less than 5 minutes on a serger. If all you have is a regular machine though, I definitely don't recommend cutting corners by doing a zig-zag stitch...while it's faster, it's only marginally better than unfinished edges. Otherwise, probably more worth time/money to just buy them pre-made in the links above if you don't have time/knowledge to use a serger. (it's not as hard as you think, but I say that coming from having used a regular sewing machine for years already)

I don't have specific brand recommendations, but https://www.incontinentsupport.org/chap4.php is pretty on-the-money about how much you need. For night-time I'll generally need 2-2.5 lbs of diapering, and it's quite bulky -- the only reason I don't go higher is because it can become quite painful on my back to lay on that much bulk. So, I cut back on fluids just so I can get away with thinner diapering and be more comfortable. I'll note that I do think the kind of fabric you use matters a lot. Weight will probably be roughly the same (somebody please correct me if this isn't quite right), but the bulk will be different. 2lbs of birdseye with Zorb soakers will be less bulky than the same weight in terry diapering; I have a bit of both, and the only reason I've not switched to birdseye is just difficulty locating it in Europe. On a related note, they seem to prefer All-In-One diapers in Europe rather than cloth and plastic pants...Not quite sure why. Personally I prefer plain cloth and plastic pants. I can buy the plastic pants once, and then serge/sew the cloth flats really easily at home -- so sourcing them is easy. Plus, since they're all flats I can replace/repair each piece independently as they wear out. Finally, I can layer them above to achieve the absorption I need (provided the plastic pants are big enough). Anyway, hope that helps!

Yep! For me, this happened a few months into my second go at untraining. I realized what had held me back was my fear of being judged by others. I realized that I didn't care about the folks that were hostile about it, because I didn't find anything valuable or constructive in it. Only folks I really cared about were the ones that cared about me in turn -- so if they had a problem with it, then it was probably something I also cared about (for me, that'd be smell, keeping things clean and discrete, skin healthy, emotionally healthy, etc.). Outside that is catastrophizing...not something that is worth paying attention to, anyway. Anyway, after that realization, it clicked and I was happy with it.

This, for me. When using diapers for both, it makes zero sense to consistently use diapers that last longer than 4-5 hours (financially). That said, I really did find myself craving something different from the usual medical no-name. I think in my next go-around I'll stock some ABDL diapers for fun, just to add some variety for fun's sake. ?

Glad this was helpful! But, I'll caution that like others have noticed, bedwetting is a bit fickle. The first time I tried untraining it lasted only two months...but for whatever reason, in those two months I was wetting 4-5 days per week by the end of it, and this last time around it took me nearly 6 months to reach a similar point. I don't fully know why, hence why I suspect bedwetting is a lot more subconscious and psychological than we think (up to a point, earlier on...I'm sure Kali is right too, with the physical aspects starting to contribute at some point). I used to sit as well! At some point I switched to standing (forces me to take breaks every few hours, just to sit down for a bit), and I had very few leaking problems after that. Any and all times I've leaked have been sitting down at my desk in the office, or sitting on the couch watching stuff on the computer. But, I also had male anatomy at that time...typical leaks were due to the "dam problem", out the sides on the front (plus, at some point I had to stop caring which direction I was pointed anyway because it was causing me to hold subconsciously). For those times in the office, Oznl's advice was spot-on...plastic pants with a terry liner were pretty non-negotiable anytime I left the house, really. Even with that and a Tena Ultima I needed to be super vigilant about sticking to changing schedules while in the office...and I still had to carry backup pants and liners because I'd still leak sometimes.

Thanks for sharing! You're being very meticulous, and it's helpful for comparison! Can relate a lot to what you've been going through with nighttime. Eventually I stopped thinking about it, and suddenly I found I wasn't waking up anymore...just finding myself wet in the morning with some still in my bladder. And that progressed from having some leftover in my bladder to eventually less more often. It was roughly: dry waking up to pee, but falling asleep before doing it waking up to pee, and sometimes remembering to do it. feels like a chore to try, just want to sleep, but push through it. waking up to pee and remembering to do it. feeling less like a chore, more relief. vaguely waking up mid-pee sometimes waking up already wet, but mostly full bladder. questioning if it wasn't just waking up to pee and forgetting. sometimes waking up more wet, and less-full bladder. feeling less convinced I woke up and simply forgot -- marking it as waking up wet sometimes. waking up completely wet and mostly empty. convince I wasn't waking up at all, confidently marking it as waking up wet. waking up wet continues to increase in frequency throughout, but really picks up at this point. Maybe was once a week, maybe nothing for a few weeks for the first 4 months or so...And then months 5-6 it picked up really fast and it started becoming really consistent and feeling like it was every other day because suddenly it was. Also, good idea with making messing everyday an active goal. I lost track of that at some point myself and ended up only going every few days or so, I think it probably hurt my progress because of that (even though I wasn't holding back when I did go). Will keep that in mind for myself!

At one point, I tried doing an "everything and the kitchen sink" kind of bag with my work laptop and changing supplies in it, but it was wayyy too big and bulky to fit in a messenger bag. I could carry it, but felt suuuuper awkward and definitely couldn't make an excuse carrying that around at lunch. So, I split it up and put my changing supplies in my purse and the rest (laptop, etc) in my backpack. It might sound awkward too, but it's a lot more popular with the other folks I see commuting on the train to work. And by 'purse' for a dude it could just be a smaller messenger bag that would be just as inconspicuous. In my purse I keep my main changing supplies: 1-2 diapers wet wipes bigger plastic bag (for wet clothes or plastic pants) smaller plastic bags (for bagging messy diapers) backup plastic pants backup plastic pant liner (single-layer terry fitted garment) 0.5x1.0m PUL cut in its own bag (so I don't transfer floor germs into my purse) It's all discrete enough to fit in my purse (smaller than a full tote bag, but that's my style), and I just carry my purse everywhere with me. I did find any kind of conventional changing pad would be too bulky to fit, and too small to protect me from the floor. So, I got a cut of PUL fabric and used that instead...no need to surge the edges or anything. It isn't padded, but it keeps me and my clothes off the floor during messy changes, and it folds up into practically nothing. I keep it in its own bag to prevent transferring floor (or diaper) germs into my purse. Only other note is that I can only fit 1-2 diapers at a time in my purse, so at some point in the day I need to transfer an extra diaper (or two) from my backpack to my purse. So, in the backpack I keep a smaller little opaque zipper bag with a spare diaper in it (I made my own out of dark denim); it's a bit more discrete to transfer that to my purse than an obvious diaper.

Maybe? The first time I tried untraining, I went from dry at night to wetting 4 or 5 nights per week with very little daytime awareness in a span of two months. I pursued both, so I didn't hold back at all. I wanted to lose my continence, quite a lot. The second time, a similar process happened to maybe 75% the previous try and over 6 months or so...I was only wet every other night or so by the end of it. I wanted to lose my continence...but I also knew I really couldn't and would have to stop for SRS so while I put my focus on it I couldn't fully commit. The physical after-effects were a bit more insidious. The first time around, I had stronger post-void drip than before and more urgency. The second time around I've noticed now that I uncontrollably drip when laughing...not a lot, but the difference is it happens despite me focusing on not letting it happen. I started to spiral and still have bladder control. I'm dry at night and day, aside from dripping when laughing. Atm, I tolerate it...I know stopping is temporary for me, and have every intention to return to it when I can and spiral further. Not doing anything to continue the spiral, in fact I'm deliberately clenching etc to reverse it. Not there yet I think they're congruent / related. And, I think it is both the bedwetting pushing the spiraling and the spiraling pushing the bedwetting. Generally speaking, I advanced the more I relaxed and let things happen and did what I could to feel safe in bed...And the more I wet the bed, the more during the day I didn't noticed when I wet or how much. I've been through both, so to speak...one happened in 2 months, one happened to 75% in 6 months. If I had to guess, there's maybe an emotional connection (as I've noticed during high-stress I progress less), and a sense of permanence / commitment (the first time, I didn't see any barriers/reasons to stop and progressed much faster than my most-recent trials where I knew it wouldn't last from the moment I started). But, at the same time in either case I've been able to progress and while I've retrained there have been some lasting (while minor) physical changes despite the above. So I'd lean on some of this being in the head, and some of it being in the body...but the body changes take a long time. Lots of the folks that I've seen with full incontinence from this have been doing it several years, and I have at most 8 months under my belt...So, of course I wouldn't expect to see many physical changes. BUT, I have had them so it shows that whatever untraining I've done has had some lasting changes no matter my mood or motivation... The way I see it, it's just a matter of time for me at least.

I didn't experience the same kind of sensations inside, so could be difference of anatomy? I had male anatomy at the time, so while I didn't experience that kind of stuff inside I did experience annoying tingling and twitchiness at the head of my ... thing ... for several weeks. Completely forgot about it until you mentioned it!

Seconding this. It seemed that in-general when I was more...at peace?...with untraining, I would wake up wet more often. Whereas when I struggled with it or was stressed out too much, it just wouldn't happen. That said, there's definitely some amount of wetting habituation too. As I'm deliberately detraining a bit atm (will retrain after some time), I have had at least one night where I woke up mid-pee but have otherwise had dry nights more often; before, I wouldn't wake up at all. I'm more aware, so I'm waking up when it happens but my mental and body reflex is still to wet without thinking about it and I have to deliberately stop it.