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It never fails to amaze me how non-incons, young ones, especially, constantly try to legitimize being a DL or AB, by wanting to become incon or trying to be. Angela has been able to deal with incontinence over her life, as have many other incons. BUT, watch the threads. Incons that have had no choice, realistically, in wearing diapers for sanitary and sensible protection, seem like they have embraced DL or AB. Indeed, some HAVE. But, there are others that would give up body parts to NOT have to deal with incontinence and all the considerations it brings with it, and that means, most likely, a great deal of the true incon world. The incons we see at sites like this have made lemonade out of lemons... Why people continue to want to legitimize their diaper desires/life/world by "being incon" tells me there is a lack of thought or maturity. Most are young and still living with parents, which, like anything else, precludes freedom of operation. Get a job, move out, get your own place or find a place with another DL or AB - um, maybe develop a friendship/connection WITH another DL or AB, FIRST - and then buy and wear to your heart's delight! WHY need to become incon to make you feel comfortable with your diaper desires/life/world? And, beyond that, WHY does anyone ELSE, especially family members, NEED to know you're into diapers? Do you have a blazing urge to tell them you're into BDSM, or enemas, or gay sex, or whatever? WHAT will it accomplish? YOU'LL feel better; their feelings be damned. And, you want to tell them so you can be around them or run around in just diapers? Would you do that with your boxers or tighty whities? I mean, it's like ANY lie we live to LIVE a lie. Once we 'fess up, WE may feel better about it - and you'll always have to remember WHAT lie you told to WHOM, to not eventually bust yourself, which you eventually WILL - but it doesn't give a single thought to what others are left to consider. Go 24/7 when you can, as you can, and do it to your heart's content. Otherwise, live and let live. Let other people to deal with their own problems... Oh, and after 8 years of college, and with medical technology today, a MD, DO or urologist is going to see through a sham. Does your medical insurance cover all the unnecessary battery of tests you could be asked to have done? And, once exposed as a liar and faker, I'm sure your cred (along with your medical history) will go far with other medicos you seek out. Wear. Use. Enjoy. Leave other people out of it - until you can connect with that ultimate partner that can indulge you how you want to be indulged on a daily basis.

Have had it, numerous times, "from the tap". It was like nectar, slightly sweet and "lo-fat". My ex didn't smoke, ate healthy and limited alcohol. Her children absolutely hated that rubbery teet leaving her full and hurting. So, once she found I rather enjoyed "helping her out"(constant expression via a breast pump can be painful to deal with, besides full "storage tanks" for a reasonably well-endowed woman being a burden), she would even ask, at times, if I would mind draining the tank farm. What goes on in Jolly Olde and the rest of Europe might be fine, but the FDA would have a field day with this idea AND the product. I can't see the US FDA ever allowing this type of a product onto the market. I agree that you can't treat women like cattle, which you might have to do to assure constant and a reliable - quality and wholesomeness - supply. Wet nurses continue to lactate well beyond child-bearing years, but I'm not sure a commune of "Stepford Lactators" is going to be able to be maintained - or members kept pregnant all the time - to assure a reliable supply of main ingredient. Too, once the novelty wears off, especially at that type of price, the business would probably fade away. Interesting idea, however....

Oh, and if it feels like your skin is starting to be burned - and it can be itchy and uncomfortable to begin with - you need to get changed immediately. If you begin to get diaper rash, the discomfort will leave a bad taste in your mouth and you won't want to try what can be a very enjoyable experience!

Depending upon the consistency and acid level of your messy, it can be like a coating of thick mud coating your cheeks as you move around. If it doesn't burn, and it isn't irritating to "wear", the longer you are in a messy diaper, the more you do "normal" things, the less aware of it you are - you'll focus more on wetting, and how much absorption is left - and less uncomfortable it becomes, and the more you ignore it, reminded more, in cases, by the "aroma". I second sitting on the toilet and imagine you are not diapered, and "let go". Once the deed is done, you can't go back, and you simply have to deal with it. It's kind of like a forced messing in a diaper bondage scene, but can help make doing it seem more natural.

Kelly, we've traded thoughts before. I'm surprised to see you come to this site for advice in this regard, but I have a hunch you got a lot of good input before, and came to know a lot of the members here are pretty solid - um, not ALL, BTW, LOL - in sincerity, concern and empathy. The support has been along the lines of empathy. Only you can decide where you want to be - and stick to that decision. You really can't waffle. If you "go for it", out on your own, you force yourself to make it. And, having come to know you, I know you WILL make it. I'm concerned that your boyfriend is a minor, while you are a legal adult. That is another issue. Your father is using guilt to keep you close, perhaps as a buffer to help shield himself from your mother. That you and she were at odd's ends with each other isn't so abnormal or odd, but I don't know the whole story. And, disagreement between child and parents, especially as the child is into their teens and closing in on adulthood, is almost to be expected. I'm sorry to see you unhappy, but I hate to see you used as a shield, and be kept that way by guilt. Love is fine - for your father - but you do have a life to live, and he has to make decisions about his life with her, too. Using another person to facilitate one's own life can be destructive to that other person. I would suggest the book, "Toxic Parents - Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life" by Susan Forward. My ex-wife SO needed the book, as does my secretary, but pride and denial kept them both from reading the book and understanding what power a parent has to control and raise up or destroy their child in their upbringing. Sometimes parents don't even realize the destruction they can cause because they themselves have never properly dealt with what baggage THEY bring along from THEIR childhood! My ex filed for divorce, not because of my DL side/life/world - though she used it against me in the divorce - but because I "didn't make her happy"? What? WTF? Oh, and this was the "Ice Princess" that learned her craft from the ultimate "Ice Queen", may God NOT rest her soul... Be advised that when we are younger, life, no matter how well planned, and no matter what road is taken, can long be in a state of flux and transition. If you can fight to keep yourself from being sucked back into a bad situation - all around, as Dad is not helping you, though keeping open communication with him is fine - and continue to tread water for now, while continuing to keep your focus and lay out an itinerary to shoot for, YOU, of those I've met here, WILL find your way. I only hope that the support you get will be helpful, and all advice considered will be good. One thing I hope doesn't happen here it that, in some cases, not every bit of advice is taken. Since we are all human, and alike, with similar problems, the advice can be only worth what you paid for it! And, I think it's more like an A.A. group - there's no real leader, but it's the "fellowship" that makes all the difference in a member's continuing recovery... Best to you, Kiddo!

Us older ones, who have had to work for a while to get what we do have, seem to lean to holding onto the winnings, and then develop a plan - to make it last longer and go further than immediate gratification. I agree with the Duck. Though, I'm sure, we'd both gratefully deal with the remnants of any win, after taxes were paid, a couple of mil would be great to play with, and make the windfall work for me. Pay off existing debt, which is small right now, in the scope of debt that a lot of people carry, maybe a little to play at casinos with, and invest the rest. I mean, the money didn't come being expected. Squandering it doesn't make sense. Being patient to enjoy greater creature comforts over time appeals to me...

The reality is that you don't have to give up anything to have your diapers, wear them, enjoy them and have a relationship, too. It's all in how you approach your "proclivity", your leanings, your urges, your "addiction". You cannot "drop in" your diaper side/life/world into a partner's lap AFTER THE FACT. You cannot expect a partner top embrace YOUR "thing", especially if they've been "blindsided" by the revelation when it finally comes, and especially if they aren't of the most open mind or mostly "vanilla" when it comes to variations of the so-called "norm" or what is generally accepted in intimate situations. A lot of people SAY that diapers are not sexual for them, but I will bet, in most cases, it becomes sexual in nature, by virtue of the fact that diapering someone IS very sensual and intimate for any number of reasons. When I decided to get back into the dating "market", I tried a variety of things and ways to broach my DL side/life/world with prospective partners. I knew that I would not be able to put my DL away and hide it ever again, nor would I be "unfaithful", indulging myself "on the sly", without my partner knowing what I was up to. Eventually, I would be "busted", and then all hell would break loose if it wasn't accepted. I chose to bag budding and potential long-term relationships rather than have to not be able to indulge a very special and enjoyable pleasure in my life - absorbent underwear! My current wife is even acceptant to nearly 24/7 for me, and the occasional load in my pants around her. But, the "line in the sand" was, at least, acceptance by her, BEFORE a relationship developed, and a lot of time and emotion had been devoted to that relationship. And, even she admits that that was fair. And, like anything else in life that you don't expose your kids to - unless you want to run the potential of losing them in a divorce, for example - your diaper life, and diaper world, needs to be kept behind closed doors. I'd hate to find out that my child was also a DL, but because of MY exposing the child to it early in life. If they become a DL, fine. But, the only way it's acceptable to me is if they discover it on their own. You might have to deny yourself certain things with the life/lifestyle you choose in indulging your diaper desires, but you really don't have to give anything up. And, if you were truly incon, diapers would simply be a absorbent underwear dealing with a problem, your incontinence would be a cross that you would bear, and you'd figure out how to deal with it, and incorporate those diapers you need for practicality sake into your life and any relationship. We tend to make this whole thing too difficult given that diapers are legal, not immoral OR fattening, and the diaper market is huge, brining manufacturers worldwide healthy profits, besides accepted for infants and older people with leaky plumbing. I may have had to bag a few potential relationships, but, on the whole, my DL were only a minor part of why the relationships terminated. I knew whether the connection was "the one" or not. The wife I have now IS "the one". And, along with that came the freedom to be the DL I am today. I never fail to thank God for His hand in answerng my prayers as He did. I'm very content. But, I also had a hand in it. And, most people only have to BE a little PROactive. We can make our own breaks. We have to create our own happiness.

I use baby cloth diapers as soakers. It kind of is the best of both worlds. Cloth wicks up liquid better and makes a better "trapping liner" with "solids", especially for the active wearer. Given that my wife would not be happy with "aroma" from unaddressed "dirty" or used cloth diapers, as opposed to dealing with a diaper pail, and trying to find a real "diaper service" diaper pail like of old, I will use my bathroom sink for up to 4 soakers - with a product like Odo Ban from Sam's Club - to soak out urine, and my tub, with liquid laundry soap and Odo Ban, to soak soiled diapers. Soak time depends upon needed use of the bathroom. I am fortunate to have my own bathroom so I can do the soak thing as I see fit. In a house with a laundry room or laundry area, this same thing can be accomplished. In situations where there's not such a luxury, the trusty old diaper pail may be necessary, and more frequent laundering than I might do. I also, once a soak is done, shower-bar dry the diapers so that I only have to launder when I have a full washer load of diapers to do. A diaper pail without soak liquid in it is, after a time, with no other rinsing or soaking, going to start giving off a strong odor that can't really be controlled or kept in check. A lot of it all depends upon the number of diapers to be dealt with and how often and how quickly do laundry...

Personally, I, for one, think you've been fair and are being fair. I hope he will respond in kind, and stick to any compromise that you both agree upon when it gets to that. And, compromise means you don't both get everything you both want. If you have to, make a list on paper. Add, eliminate and get it balanced, back and forth. If it's in black and white, you can have a record of the compromise and agreement you come to, and when it was come to! Good luck!

The fairest thing to do would be to come to a compromise TOGETHER. He can vocalize what he feels he needs, what he would like to have, and you can vocalize what you are comfortable with and would prefer to see. In that way, he doesn't feel he has to indulge himself on the sly, secretly, and you can live life reasonably secure that he is not running around on you secretly or on the sly, doing things privately and not keeping you in the loop. However, as situations change, for either of you, you both also have to be willing to make changes in acceptable parameters. And, I would reccommend that you NOT decide to tighten the "noose"(parameters) after agreeing to looser ones. That, after the fact, is not fair. Also, if he has not "fessed up" or provided you with any other information he might have held back on, THAT isn't fair and will come back to haunt him. In this crazy DL/AB world, it's the peeps that simply have not been upfront and open from the git-go that get bitten.

I'm going to Vegas and haven't had to deal with the body scanners or pat downs or the TSA. And, for this trip, my wife asked me if I couldn't just let it go for this trip, as I would have to take a suitcase with "supplies" to do that. I don't WANT to. Even though I'm a DL, and I will be discreet, I would have a ball being diapered for this trip, Tuesday thru Saturday. And, I can probably do with one Molicare, with soakers, per day, if I had to. Don't NEED to wear at night. And, the onesie I like has metal snaps in the crotch. But, I also have titanium hips which always set off the metal detectors. So, since I'm almost 24/7 at times, I'm not sure I want to "unbundle", though I could. I'm going to think about it... Oh, and in an upgrade, up to two suitcases per person fly free... LOL

While I agree, BriGuy, it's been fun to watch the continued debate end up in a discussion of "legality". I think even you stated before, the whole issue boils down to INTENT. Accidental exposure is just that, and it is probably agreed that accidental exposure brings more embarassment than thrill to the exposer. And, I'd bet, in a majority of cases, they'd be very apologetic for offending anybody. And, the amount of exposure would most likely be very limited. I'm sure, laws or no laws, of any kind, that true accidental, unintended exposure, would be disregarded and forgotten. I would hope that in a contrived "accidental exposure" situation, that it would be short, even if it were a thrill to the exposer, or with whatever other contrivance was included. I agree with Jeff that it might be a very fine line to walk to pull it off, and have Readymade be able to truly enjoy the experience. Maybe SHE should weigh in to edify us to THAT side of things, to see what it would take to be a satisfactory "humiliation". Would it ruin the surprise? Um, she'd never know WHEN Jeff was going to put her into the situation, and might allow it to be even more elaborate, but risk even less offensiveness to others. Might have been an aspect we've all been missing operating from just one point of view...

You do realize that many infants may start out sucking on a pacifier when the first go to bed, but it ends up out of their mouth - falls out or is spit out - soon after they fall asleep, especially the older they get, and more nurse for nurishment, than just to satisfy the sucking urge?

Oh, woe is me, a constant thread at this site. I don't mean to sound mean, but the issue IS, what we all seek is actually the "end point", the ultimate goal we could have. We have to approach this journey intelligently - and since members need to be legal age to be here, ADULTLY - and, if not like solving a puzzle, if not like a detective solving a case, if not like an adventurer mapping out a quest, go patiently and develop networking skills, in which doors can be opened, through others, to come closer to our ultimate goals. We have to develop a particular "game plan" that works for us and is comfortable. We also have to be realistic - as to what can be, and how it can be accomodated amidst the reality of adult life - and patient. What we seek, since it's not "mainstream", will NOT be "dropped into our laps". Too, we cannot sit back and wait for something to happen. We have to have a goal, we have to develop a plan and we have to be PROactive - meaning we have to "get out there" and make something happen! It can actually be fun to embark upon the quest of fulfillment, especially as we try to satiate our quirk, our "thing". Two marriages, two relationships where my DL was not accepted well and may have had a hand in their demise - 2nd marriage my wife chose to use my DL against me in the divorce - and I was not going to my grave single, nor was I ever going to hide my DL side/life/world again. So, I developed a plan. I am now happily married almost three years, and I'm openly diapered, sitting at the computer, ready to fill my pants, and it's accepted Woo-hoo. I can ask for very little more. But, I developed a plan to make that kind of thing possible. And, she's a stunner. She accepts me, encourages me, and participates with me to a satisfactory degree. However, I developed a plan, was fair, was open and didn't compromise on what I felt I needed and wanted. That's all that a person has to do. Sometimes, they just need to "grow up" to figure out how to "get little" again. It can be done, successfully. But, it isn't done overnight.

I have ordered from these folks, as I have from the Baby-Doll Shop, from the now defunct magazine, Baby-Doll. European diapers are tops, and you can get brands you can't get in the US and models from companies, like Tena, that you can't get here, too. The US FDA has seen to that. US diapers are made of different fluff material on the inside... HOWEVER, shipping alone can be as much as the order itself, especially diapers, due to their weight(after a GREAT initial price) and time for delivery - parcel post, I think they take a slow cargo ship! - and the way larger packages show up is outrageous. I still get AirOliver monthly special emails. I also wish they had an outlet in the US!

This forum is pretty intriguing since the partner WAS told about the "leanings" before marriage. The porn aspect - albeit diaper porn or "soft porn" - tells me that there was something missing, some itch that was not being scratched, some need - probably diaper-related - that wasn't being met. Denial doesn't make anything go away. Within that denial is the false hope and belief that the "lies" being perpetrated were not being told, and that all was well. So, it's very easy to cast blame on his actions for her "hurt". It's a matter of perception, to be sure. You were married - you said you would, and he did too - so there was some sort of emotional and spiritual committment. It's good that, in just FOUR days - from the 1st post to the last one...), the whole situation turned around. As far as the porn, what kind of porn was he looking at? Not naked young women with big boobs. Not women or couples engaging in sexual acts. He was looking at adult women, wearing diapers - bare chested or not, which for most DLs or ABs has very little importance in the "scenes" - doing AB or DL things. It was more the IDEA of the scenes and perhaps he was even putting YOU in that situation, turned on by the situation and the "model" - YOU! I find a diapered adult woman - paid professional model or an "amateur" offering "candid" diaper photos of herself - far more sexy than any Playboy or Penthouse centerfold on earth. That's me. And, my wife, knowing how much SHE turns me on, is not threatened by mere photos of partially clad women - clad in diapers, especially! She's threatened by real-life women from my past, who still might be interested in me, though she doesn't need to be - I committed to HER, and I value my committment! The bottom-line is, and courses in and out of many threads, that it's only diapers! Absorbent underwear. A tactile-sensation prop that is an affectation, an addiction, a fetish, for far more(at least recognized that way by "authorities") males than for females. Diapers are a widely accepted product, with a huge market, that are neither illegal, immoral nor fattening! If you can get over your hurt, not take anything personally, get more informations, and if you can be willing, continue your exploration. And, if you find something you're uncomfortable with(more, anyway), discuss it - even if he is uncomfortable with it - in a calm, non-threatening, non-accusatory way and tone. If you have a question, and it's an issue, maybe HE needs to be more up-front and be willing to vocalize with and to YOU, about the situation. If he can't explain himself, he can't very well explain something to you, and maybe HE needs to do some additional personal inventory. You've come a long way. But, what most partners who have taken things personally and have been "hurt" need to learn is that an open-mind can sometimes lead to a special bond between a couple that no other couple, or each partner with some other partner, could have! You make lemonade from lemons or you let the lemon sour you for life. You have to decide what direction you care to take.

Maybe this thread has already been explored, and sorry if it has, however... TWO SCENARIOS: 1. Reverse "The Emperor's New Clothes" story/situation. You're out in public, in just diapers and say, t-shirt and footwear, but NO ONE ELSE can see that. What they actually see is you in "regular" "normal" adult clothing. Question: Would you go out in public dressed in just diapers even-though there would be NO shock-value? 2. You, as an adult, could freely go out dressed in just diapers, and there would be no repurcussions possible - no disturbing the peace, no public indecency, no haul-you-in for a psych evaluation, etc. However, others could see you as you were attired, and still have their own feelings about it - they just couldn't say anything about it(except privately) or lodge any kind of complaint to anyone. Question: Would you go out in public dressed in just diapers if there was no kind of repurcussion possible(legal, especially) except what others(including family and friends) think privately? 3. Is it that you crave/need public attention(for a thrill, to validate your leanings, to justify you wearing, etc.) or that you feel public freedom would be a catharsis and freeing and you would wear in public such that it was readily seen/evident, if you freely could?

Leave it to Sarah to come through again! Perfect solution for those not comfortable with "a little white lie" and lucid enough to deal with the situation personally...

I find it hard to imagine that at your age, you would even THINK about trying to become incontinent for life, let alone want to. It's like people that get married right out of high school, and go to college married. Life has not even begun and situations change. I'm a DL. I can pick and choose my times to be diapered. In reviewing the situation, it would be damned difficult to have to be in diapers all the time. It's simply not convenient a lot of the time. Geez, enjoy "playing" with diapers right now. Talk to true incons relating to work and relationships. THEN make a decision. As for me, I vote for WAIT!

What Sarah has said. I'm always amazed at the "firestorm" of replies and comments generated at times because of the lack of information provided. There are some darned smart and wise peeps that are members here, with all kinds of information, ideas and wisdom, that can be so helpful and beneficial to others. But, they can't do too much if they don't have all the information to work with. But, that's the way the forums work here. I normally enjoy them anyway. And, again, Hasen, best of luck.

I honestly had to smile here. I AM a mortician. If you are so badly injured and out of it when wheeled in, your diapers are the least of the medico's concern. That will be dealt with AFTER you are stabilized. And, if you're really worried about the situation, the person you've designated as DPOA - you have thought about THAT, haven't you - can deal with any medical questions/concerns regarding you being in diapers when brought in. Too, if it's that bad of a crash, you will probably have filled your diaper in the instant before the impact as you panic, besides being just wet. If you ended up in a nursing home, you would probably wake up back in a disposable diaper. They normally don't use plastic pants because of the difficulty of applying them to a patient laying in bed. If you wake up in a hospital bed in a hospital room, you will most likely not be diapered, but find yourself lying on a "bed pad", designed to localize wetting and protect the rest of the bedding. And, hospital staff is used to incontinence of varying degrees. Of course, like many post-op, you could wind up with a catherter in you, assuring you won't be peeing yourself or the bed, willy-nilly, which allows them to monitor how your body is doing - input of fluids versus outflow. As far as post-mortem situations, if you die in a car crash, an autopsy will be performed, meaning you will be stripped of all the clothing - including your diapers - to facilitate the procedure. With hospital cases, I rarely pick someone up who is in diapers. Nursing home cases, assisted living facility cases, hospice residence and hospice at home cases, frequently the dearly departed is diapered. And, given I am the way I am, I whole-heartedly allow them to "go to glory" diapered! As for me, hospital-wise, I'd rather ride the situation out. I've been catherterized, which is an interesting experience since I'm not an incon - I could feel my bladder emptying - but I'd rather be and would have rather been diapered. Um, kinda wasn't my choice... I have, however, gotten my wife to agree to see that I "go to glory" diapered - she is 7 years younger, so I'm just assuming she will be able to accomodate me - and I prefer cloth and plastic pants. It's possible, but it won't be as easy as disposables with no plastic pants. I smile when I think about it. I would like to know if she actually humors me. Something tells me I'll check out believing she will, but I will never know! LOL Sorry this reply sounded serious and got to morbid, but it's a great topic and the responses have been marvelous. What ABs and DLs - even the incons! - can come up with to wonder about, think about and obsess over! LMDAO

Jeff - Having been accused of being one of those "conservatives", I think you're on the right track. If she can be satisfied with the minimal exposure you're talking about, I don't think that would be much of a problem, even with her in a smallish skirt, so when she bent over, there'd be little doubt as to what her underwear was, again, if it appears more "accidental" exposure. Those that have expressed conservative views, I don't think, have been condemning. I think we've been more concerned about having any more damage done to our community than has already been done by the HNGs and peeps that just don't think about what they're doing, and in being selfish, while they are getting their kicks, perceived as okay by them, how it affects others. Like others, I feel an "inadvertant" exposure, and even the beach situation, is not so traumatic, and, in fact, help desensatize some to the fact that there are adults who do wear diapers, and while it's not widespread (or so most think, until you bundle ABs and DLs with true incons), it happens and is a fact. And, in most cases, as has been said, if it doesn't appear the exposure is for kicks, there will be empathy and disregard. That helps make what we do and how we do it more acceptable, on the whole. It may not be understood and/or embraced, but then, it's our thing, as other things are to other people. Thanks for listening to what others have had to say and recommended. I'd love to hear how the scenario plays out, and how she feels/felt with what happened.

Um, I think the idea is that, for a lot of peeps, if one's poop didn't stink, they would do it more - mess to clean up or not - and probably do it more out in public. The whole issue IS that fecal odor is normally offensive to other people, and even to poopers themselves. The idea is to not be offensive to other people, forcing them to deal with our "thing". That isn't fair and is patently wrong. Those that would poop in public, delighting in having other people know it, do not help our cause - of any hope of having acceptance of freely being a diapered adult in public...

The vignette has such a serious overtone past the fun playful part. I actually think it's very well done. It's a little over the top in regard to the potential of reality, but, you know, it COULD happen! It's really an interesting little episode. Makes one wonder who came up with the idea, who actually wrote the script, and how it got sold for production...

With all of the angles people here are trying to come up with to justify and legitimize their diapers and wearing of them, getting hauled into an ER and having them discovered after a car accident, it's a perfect situation - if you're not near death - to just let what happens happen. The idea of irresponsibility and what you say being a lie seems a little over the top at a time like that. Seems pretty tame compared with STDs and "stuff stuck up their ***. There are a number of scenarios that could then transpire. And, "white lie" or not, if questionned, and rather than have to explain why you came in diapered, you can simply say it was because of need, and leave it at that. So, explain why, or simply prolong a "white lie" that you are living by being in diapers, if you didn't actually need them, when you got into the accident. For me, I'd want to ride it out. For most in the AB/DL world it would be a perfect way to be "out", almost "legitimately". Diapers are a legitimate, legal product, that are on the market for a reason, and they are available and used in the medical world. As long as you "play along", and aren't openly acting excited about acting out a fantasy, it doesn't have to be such a dastardly deed, and might be a memorable story for one's diary! To each, their own strategy...