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tcc

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Everything posted by tcc

  1. As a regular bedwetter until I was 17, I discovered that I would dream that I was standing in front of the toilet and letting go. I would wake up in a wet bed - my parents were reluctant, unfortunately, to just diaper me at night. As I got older - at first, I slept so soundly I didn't know when I wet the bed - and recognized the bathroom dream, I would force myself to wake up(not sure how I did that) and find I had to go to the bathroom, would get up and go, before I wet the bed! Now, nearing 60, I find my bladder capacity diminishing and urgency increasing tremendously. I think I'll just stay diapered "just in case", since I have had some real embarassing moments I've never had before...
  2. I think for me, my diaper life has become more comfortable. I wear when I want, and to the degree I want - because I CAN. If there's been a change, it is because I am able to enjoy my fetishism on MY terms, as I want, WHEN I want. My "diaper stash" very complete. I am comfortable. THAT is what makes the difference.
  3. Love the new layout of the site. Almost unparalleled and very professional and user friendly. Thanks for hanging in there and give our world a site like this and something we need!
  4. There you go! Nobody should be left alone to be found in a predicament by outsiders. Wife shouldn't be upstairs sleeping while you are struggling. And, agreed with the others that some sort of escape mechanism should be available and in place.
  5. Should not be a problem if the fetishism is out in the open, discussed if needed, accepted or agreed to - BEFORE the rings get traded. If it isn't, a DL or AB is headed for trouble OR a lifetime of hiding, frustration and disappointment. Been there, done that. Can do my own thing, openly, in my THIRD marriage.
  6. Since other sites have come and gone, Fetlife is a great place to connect in the DL/AB world. I like it.
  7. While I like to wear cloth, for travel and daily use out and about, it's disposables. So, travelling, unless I can buy at my destination, especially with the TSA, I just don't do diapers when travelling. Too, with the "package" I like to put together when I wear - soakers of cloth and disposable inserts, and plastic pants - I can't really put together that kind of package somewhere else and I wouldn't be content. My "system" usually lasts most of a day. Now, when it's local travel, like "in state", in the car, depending upon my mood, I go "bundled" or not. And, usually, I take a diaper bag with me so I can get a change or get bundled when I get to where I'm going. I love being diapered on car trips. I usually would have to stop along the way on a long trip. Diapers are so much more convenient. If only I could get my dearly beloved to see and understand and embrace that for herself! LOL I always wonder what the maids think when they find my Molicare "package" in the bathroom garbage. I'm sure they've seen it all already. And, I'm sure the $5 tip left on the night stand doesn't hurt! LOL I usually bring my cloth soakers home in a Ziplock bag after rinsing them. Thus, for an overnight, like to a casino, being diapered the whole time is pure pleasure.
  8. For me, if I am wearing, I use. If I use, then it only makes sense to me, if I can do it, to use up the diaper as much as possible UP to the point of leaking, cloth OR disposables. But, it's not always possible. Part of it is the decadence I feel in being diapered and using when I don't have to be in diapers OR use. And, I think that speaks for a lot of us in our "community"...
  9. I only had one time that I purged and threw supplies away - including a dozen perfectly good cloth adult diapers and plastic pants - and, of course, like everyone else, was back replacing those supplies within six months. I think I had more guilt at "being different", as I felt I was, and with something that surely had to be "wrong", and truly was "out of sync with society", but, for the most part, just wanted to know that I was not alone in my thinking, in my type of desires, and that if MY mind could conceive it, and be turned on by it, others "out there", also could be of the same mind-state. And, all I wanted to do was "connect", somehow, and if nothing else(and this was back in the snail-mail days only, and early days of DPF and like Nugget magazine "Personals" section) just KNOW that I was not alone, not warped, not crazy, not mentally ill and not in need of being institutionalized or seeing a shrink to deal with my diaper "obsession". And, back then, I thought I needed all the trappings of "adult infancy" to legitimize my diaper urges, wear and use. When I got over THAT hurdle, I was good to go. Diapers are easy to hide, easy to use out in public, and easy to be discreet with - being in them and using them - and very practical, and MY choice to have as MY underwear. And, where I got there, I relaxed and have never looked back, and never will. Guilt? Yes. Self-loathing? Never. It's only diapers - a legitimate product for a legitimate need - even if I CHOOSE to wear them and use them, and not NEED or HAVE to...
  10. You need to get away from the lie. Women always have a way, accepting or not, to find out the truth. You need to get a handle on YOUR "diaper thing". When you become comfortable with who you are and what you're into - you're very young and inexperienced in the relationships world(I've been at this over 40 years, and married a third time...) - it makes it easier to 'reveal" your diaper side. It's imperitive, as secrets discovered, and secrets kept, will blow apart a relationship quickly. And, it will destroy trust. Better to have loved and lost - moved on because your kink was NOT acceptable to or accepted by your partner - and do so BEFORE a lot of time and emotion is invested into a relationship, and then do like many others have done, "drop" a diaper "surprise" into a partner's lap - and learn how to meet acceptant-type partners and how to reveal, early on, to best succeed at having successful relationships - with diapers included - and maybe finding, ultimately, "the one". It's all in the approach and in the reveal...
  11. She wears several times a week for you - and it's YOUR thing. She WEARS. And, that's not enough? It never fails to amaze me - and I, like many others, are grateful WHEN a partner wears, let alone those that would kill to HAVE a partner wear - some people just do NOT know how good they have it - until it's GONE. Be grateful with what you have. It's YOUR thing. Revel in THAT and what you have...
  12. One thing about "sociality" is a unique uneasiness a DL can feel being around another DL. I mean, if you're both discreet, you both know you both are wearing and using, but it's not obvious either way. Thus, what do you say? How do you socialize? Do you just talk about the weather? Do you just go about your business and disregard the common bond you have of being diapered without it being obvious, and working toward needing a diaper change right in front of someone else? Kind of like what a true incon would experience as their underwear soaked up leakage as they went about normal activity. At times, it can be a "wink, wink, nod, nod" especially if you're not to the point where you might openly talk about Daily D activity, or FetLife, or Wet Set, or visit of any other diaper sites or diaper photo sites. And, even then, just how long and how much can you talk about DIAPERS? I guess that's what I like best about limited social contact with other DLs anymore, and being able to freely, while discreetly, "do my thing". I know I'm not unique and I know I'm not alone. But, for others, it's another ballgame. Such is life...
  13. You know, if you're going to have a roommate, it seems you would want freedom of movement in your own domicile. You can either be a "shrinking violet" and live in fear of "discovery", or admit you "plumbing" has leakage, and whenever - day, night, both - you tend to wear absorbent underwear to stanch the flow and stay sanitary. That's ALL a roommate has to know. Thus, if you're out padding around in just diapers, while it may take some getting used to for the roommate, so be it. It's a shared situation - say HE wanted to dress up in women's clothes! - and roommates have to understand and accept each other's quirks, or don't be roommates. Relax. Probe. Challenge. Be YOU. See where it goes. You may be pleasantly surprised where it might leave you - like total freedom to be you, with no restraints, in your own home, IN FRONT OF anybody else that's there!
  14. I continue to think that most people, given that they have a particular perception of societal expectations and dictates, continue to try and legitimize their DL side/life/world, and their CHOOSING to wear and use diapers - a legal product produced for a legitimate need, FIRST. Spun into that is the guilt and self-loathing that comes with a person feeling they have failed at upholding expectations of them - and it doesn't matter WHOM has or seems to have those expectations, parents, family, friends, society in general - when they find themselves "different", find that they enjoy being different, and WHAT makes them different, and struggle with self-acceptance first, societal expectations be damned. The AB community wants to be able to freely and openly be an AB, and have it accepted. Unless there comes a "Stepford" project to make the entire society automatons, and oblivious to certain thoughts and opinions that someone who can freely think might have, the AB community is never going to be accepted as those in it would fantasize of it being - adults dressed and acting like a doddering infant and wanting, demanding and needing total care, while in a world of expected responsibility, is simply not going to fly. And, many in the DL world are so wrapped up at being uncomfortable with and not accepting their diaper stimulation, that takes the place of and overshadows potential pleasure, comfort and enjoyment of a simple prop that is also very functional - a diaper - and whatever trappings might come along with it. Good topic, interesting thread, maybe too deep and maybe more deep than the whole situation needs to be. And, simply my humble opinion...
  15. In my humble opininon, if you want to dump disposable diapers into the trash, do it and forget about it. Unless your name is on the diaper(s), how would anybody know they are YOUR used diapers. Now, since REUSABLE diapers - cloth diapers, needing laundering and plastic pants to make them waterproof(as is possible) - don't go INTO the trash bin or dumpster, the problem is eliminated. I see a couple of issues, both of which can be addressed fairly easily...
  16. I really get a kick out of your topics. There are so many levels of likes and dislikes, of turn-ons and turn-offs. Pretty much it's an open discussion of what actually IS of pleasure to the different members of our community... I guess it's what helps make our "community" quite unique, but it's amazing how many different paths the members take and prefer...
  17. OMG. You're into diapers and you don't want to smell like baby powder or a baby? Oh, sacriledge, sacriledge! OMG! Um, just teasing! I LOVE being diapered - DISCREETLY - in public, but it's MY thing. And, I, too, prefer not to leave an "aroma trail" of baby powder. I'm NOT a baby, especially an AB, just into diapers. Woo-hoo!
  18. The reality is, WHY do you feel others need to know about YOUR "thing"? Will it make YOU feel better to hang that detail of YOUR life onto them, and let THEM carry it around, especially if it might potentially damage any relationship you already have? That's the whole key, as I have seen and learned, except when we are dealing with an intimate, or life partner, who NEEDS to know of quirks, if that's what the AB/DL thing IS, in a relationship, WHY does a person feel the need to "share"? YOU might feel better for "getting it off your chest", but what does it do for the OTHER person, who may or may not be able to deal with the revelation, who may or may not be able to accept and/or encourage you, who may or may not be able to continue your friendship - and it can be a very weak reason to not continue - because of it. We, in the AB/DL community are so into guilt and self-loathing because of OUR perceptions of OURSELVES, we want to try whatever we can to find that self-acceptance, and the freedom to do OUR "thing", without repurcussion. The fact IS that it's only diapers. They are a legal, legitimate product for a legitimate need. That beyond incons buy them and use them, by choice, for sexual purposes or otherwise, is nobody else's business. If it's going to make you feel better about yourself to reveal to others, it's your choice to share. Just be aware of the damage it can do, for all the good it might do, too. There are no assurances, either way.
  19. I had forgotten, but one other thing - and we're talking a grown, adult woman with two adult children - I alluded for a while about harboring a deep dark secret that I said I figured was going to push/chase her away, and when the time was right would tell her about. I kept the relationship slow, dating, not going for sex. She even went to the sex offender list for the area AND checked the parole listings for local felons, to see if I was on it. I painted such a dark picture that when the time was right, we took a walk in a park, and sat, and I revealed. Of course, compared to her worst suspicions - see, she too could see that this could very well be the start of a relationship with "the one" - it was, "Oh, is that all?". And, I took her down a short journey of my DL side/life/world. She still is not, after 6 years together, and 4 years of marriage, all that aroused to be a part of things, but as MY "thing", I have total freedom to do what I enjoy, since it doesn't negatively impact our relationship, otherwise. And, since she sees it pleases ME, she knows that her acceptance is also good for HER. I see that she doesn't suffer for me having a DL side/life/world.
  20. With my first wife, I was afraid, but had very strong diaper urges, so I figured it was best to forge ahead and just blurt it out on night. I never really DID get much of a response, but it was obvious it wasn't well accepted or appreciated. It's not what SHE would have imagined to be a part of. With my second wife, a RN, I figured I'd try the "I'm a bedwetter and need diapers..." approach. That only went so far, at first, because I knew she would then talk about my "problem" with my mother, who knew nothing of my DL side/life/world, except finding a pair of plastic pants hidden under my bed, in a box, while cleaning my room one time. Um, I've been into diapers since I was 12. And, after 15 years of marriage, my diaper thing, though it was of little problem, since my then-wife had joined me, and I had photos to prove it, chose to use my DL side against me and as an "ace card", to try and get my kids away from me and child/spousal support. I nipped that in the bud, it cost me dearly, financially, and we parted ways - and my kids were not taken away. For my third and current wife, I made up my mind(when I started dating again, and went the route of online date sites), that if I truly had interest in a woman, before things got very sexual, before much time and emotion was invested, I would reveal my DL side/life/world to any woman I was dating, and out of fairness to HER - AND me. If she seemed to be able to handle it, as matter of fact, or show some interest in it, we'd continue on. If she couldn't deal with it - and I was able to spot the "red flags" starting to flap on the horizon; I could sense a problem looming in the future - it was time to cut my losses, be sad for however long, but move on. And, not once did my revelation come back to bite me - a woman being spiteful and trying to destroy me socially because of my DL thing - because I hadn't been untruthful, or try to hide reality, and we would part as friends or, at least, as adults, understanding it just wasn't going to work out, whether because of my DL thing or anything else. Knowing how strong my DL side/life/world is, I went so far as to say, even with my current wife, that it HAD to be accepted, or we'd need to part. I'd been the compromise route, and that wasn't going to work. If you can't accept, we need to move along. And, for me, that was the right approach to come to, since there was no "secret", and no reason to not trust me, since I had shared something a major - for ME - as this. The only thing I would wish for would be to have my wife embrace a DL side, and join me a lot of the time. But, I HAVE acceptance and encouragement, and way more than I expected I might have. It's still MY thing. She says "Live and let live." She also says "It's only diapers!" Obviously, everybody has to choose their own and their own best time to reveal. But, to me, sooner, rather than later, is what it needs to be...
  21. My comment is always, "before much time and emotion is invested", a partner should be entitled to your "revelation". The reality is that we, in the AB/DL world make way too much of our diaper "thing" - I mean, it's only diapers, a legal, legitimate product produced for a legitimate need. However, when used as a prop, as part of fetishism, for a partner that isn't into "variations", blindsiding them with diaper fetishism, out of the clear blue, AFTER a trusting relationship has been started, isn't fair, and in most cases the "worst case scenario" is going to ensue. Better to have loved and lost, and cut someone loose or be cut loose early on as opposed to have someone really pissed off because you were too afraid to reveal, and if they can't accept, that you strung them along, living a lie about yourself, keeping a secret. If you're still so afraid, you need to get to really know the partner intimately, and what's going on in all the "nooks & crannies" of THEIR brain. If someone shows NO seeming interest in anything but a vanilla outlook, they won't be right for you. Your secret will always keep you on edge, hoping you'll never slip and reveal or be discovered, and you'll always be hiding something - something you will never be able to purge from your list of desires. It's been tried and talked about a zillion times. Telling a partner, after the fact, and maybe it's the trust issue or it's felt you've been less than honest, usually ends up badly. You also have to remember that diapers are YOUR thing. Even if you DO have an acceptant partner, it doesn't mean they are going to totally embrace diapers and diaper play, and join you, and especially, enjoy diaper play and take it on for themselves. In any reveal, you have to be prepared for all different levels of acceptance, IF you even get that. Um, 40+ years a DL. I've had a lot of chance to explore a whole lot in this regard. Good luck. Oh, and Pampers212 has added a mouthful...
  22. It really is too bad you chose not to reveal BEFORE the relationship. Normally, revelation AFTER THE FACT does not go well. And, if you continue to keep silent - and not take your chances, and not risk just having to move on - especially if she is not inclined to be more than "vanilla", you really would have been better off to have risked the truth, and MAYBE finding acceptance and participation, or parting ways BEFORE more time and emotion is invested into something that won't work out, or cause real problems later on in the relationship. AB/DL urges are incredibly strong, and seldom can be purged from an individual's psyche, even though they are pretty tame and not usually harmful - to anybody - unless they keep a person from having a considered "normal" life, for the most part, otherwise. You made a mistake by not 'fessing up already - or getting to know the person, and figure out how to best reveal from the beginning. I would say it's better to take your lumps, learn more about yourself and what you're into, and figure out how to better handle the situation for and in the next relationship. This comes from the experience of a DL of over 40 years...
  23. I never get tired of seeing how many little off-shoots of the AB/DL world there are out there. Just when I think I'm really content with how I am and what I'm into, something like this thread shows up! LOL For me, I just love diapers, being in them and using them. My preference, too, is "stealth". It's MY business I'm in diapers and into being in them and using them, especially in public, by MY choice. I mean, I'm discreet and don't impose MY "thing" onto anyone else. If someone were to discover I am wearing diapers or notice it, I'M the one in them and using them, not THEM. I prefer to be discreet. I prefer not to push the envelope of discovery. I prefer not to make it obvious, by sight - visible diaper line - or sound - the "noise" of a diaper and/or plastic pants(which I never go without, and usually TWO pairs of plastic pants, especially for added leakproofing in public) and especially not "smell", and that means I don't want to smell like pee and I certainly don't want to make others uncomfortable by parading around with a load in my pants. I know some don't feel complete or can't really enjoy their diaper thing without crinkly noise. As a child of the 50's, it was the swish of soft Gerber vinyl waterproof pants, which replaced Playtex latex baby pants, which had a muted, but "swish" sound as well. I'll take that any day over the "crinkle" of disposable diaper backing. But, see, that's MY thing!
  24. WHY do we continue to think that however we expose or "present" us and our world, it's gonna' help or bring acceptance? We have a partially black president - not female, but "black" - and we're THAT far. So many have the hope the AB/DL world - in terms of acceptance, - will be next. Unless our next president is an incon, it's NOT gonna' happen. Reality, peeps. Keep hopin', but NOT happenin'.
  25. It really is too bad you chose to get married and procreated a child before you revealed your diaper side/life/world to your prospective partner or impregnated her. Typical negative situation in the AB/DL world. Revelation AFTER THE FACT seldom works. Be prepared for 18 years of child support, cut this partner loose, and be more intelligent the next time. Sorry. Same old story. You can try and suppress your urges, but it won't work for long and you won't be happy, You'll always be looking for ways to satisfy those urges, which, when not satisfied, will get stronger and stronger, and you'll end up divorced anyway, with your diaper "thing" brought up in the divorce or in court. Your choice. I feel sorry for you...
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