nappyboymids

Thank you - and sure, feel free.

I would describe myself as 100% gay - I experience no sexual attraction to women at all, and never have had - and that includes women wearing diapers. Given that, it only seems reasonable to me that there are people out there who are 100% heterosexual and experience no sexual attraction to the same sex, whatever the context. If I can be a perfect Kinsey 6, other people can surely be a perfect 0. I don't think there's a correlation between queerness and liking diapers. Where I think there may be a point is that (a) because being queer inevitably requires people to address issues of sexual attraction, queer people have also tended to confront other aspects of their sexuality that are non-normative; consequently, it may appear that queer people are disproportionately represented when it comes to fetishes because they're more open to discussing them; (b) there are plenty of anecdotal examples of men who define as straight experimenting with other men if a fetish is involved and they can't find a female partner with the same interest: in effect, their fetish becomes more important than the gender of their partner. An interest in diapers does seem to be predominantly male; one suggestion is that, in relation to sexual arousal, because men have external genitals, they're more likely to be stimulated by wearing diapers than women. I don't know if that's true or not (has anyone done an evidence-based study?) but it may be an explanation in part.

Yes, every night for the last thirty years or so, and two to five times per week for the five years before that. Disposables when I'm away and cloth nappies and plastic pants at home. It's an essential part of my bedtime routine

I agree that this is an ideal and difficult to achieve - but perhaps not impossible: he's @Reddy's comment from the Getting Surgery thread a few weeks ago: "When I jerk off there is leaking. It's always wet, either because 1) I'm feeling inside my diaper, which is already wet or 2) If my diaper is off, pee leaks when I am doing it. When I orgasm, I never have any cum anymore, but instead I squirt pee. One time it hit me in the face. It's kinda funny, and what I like is it feels exactly the same as regular orgasm, to truly have that pumping amd squirting feeling. That was gone for a while after surgery, but all the same feelings happen again now, just with pee instead of cum." That sounds pretty awesome to me ...

No, being diapered and incontinent is very sexual for me. My ideal is to reach the point where I dribble continuously even when I'm hard so that I have either to stay in my diaper during any play or, if I've taken my diaper off, my partner has to be into the idea of getting peed on at some point ... (and having no idea when would be part of the fun!)

Yes, me for sure. It took me a *long* time to find the right stent design but now I have one which works perfectly for me. The only aspect that I'm less happy with is jacking off/cumming which, although intense, isn't as good a sensation as doing it without. Which leaves me with this ongoing fascination with the surgical option although ultimately I don't think it's for me ... So my stent gives me pretty much everything I want - certainly the experience of complete incontinence 🙂

I wear cloth nappies and plastic pants every night when I'm at home. Partly because I love the feel, partly because it's more economical - and I'm old enough for cloth to be what I used when I was young, although I don't really remember that ...

I find BetterDrys are an excellent high capacity medical nappy, available from ABU in the UK; also Drylife Super - more capacity than the Tenas but less than BetterDry, available from Nappies R Us or Incontinence Shop.

So here's another question (feel free not to answer if you prefer not to though!) ... What are your views now on dating? It may be something you're not even considering at the moment but I was wondering how you'd approach that situation - when to tell someone about being in diapers, would you be upfront about the surgery and incontinence desires etc?

Ah, sorry, I misunderstood. I would say the bigger the diameter the better; although most of the O ring will be redundant after it's been threaded through and consequently discareded, you need enough length for the actual threading to be possible (at least the distance from the eye of the needle to its point, and preferably a bit more). If there was such a thing as 'latex string' that would be better but O rings are easy to get and cheap.

@UsuallyDiapered Thanks for the picture - your flanges look very like mine although we obviously executed them a different way; yours is placed in the same position as my inner one (and on the same type of cath). I *think* the diameter was 1mm - I'm not sure you could find a needle with a big enough eye to accommodate more than that. I don't know about allergic reactions - O rings are (I presume) made out of a latex similar to that used in catheters? But if it doesn't work for you then obviously that's something not to pursue. It hasn't caused me any problems but we're all different. @Spargano It did need a lot of experimenting - over the years I've made at least 30 stents so there's certainly been a lot of trial and error (especially error). I honestly think that O rings are far less likely to scratch than aretrieval line - they're manufactured to be completely smooth and at 1 mm diameter they're are no sharp edges, whereas someone once compared a retrieval line to inserting a cheese wire - a bit counterintuitively, the thinner it is, the more likely it is to cause damage. Each to their own of course! Like you I got to where I am after a lot of experiments ...

@UsuallyDiapered @Spargano There's a slight discomfort inserting the stent as the O rings enter but just as when cathing for the first few times felt uncomfortable, you soon desensitise to it and now there's no problem at all. Just like the bends there's some trial and error about getting the outermost O ring in the correct position. So much of the challenge with stents seems to be preventing inward migration - I temporarily lost my stents when I first started experimenting years ago (fortunately they found their way back out); the outer O ring sits just below the external sphincter (I assume) and stops that, while the inner ring functions like the balloon on a standard cath and prevents outwards migration - put the two together and you get something stable. There's nothing preventing a retrieval line, of course, although I find them irritating (literally) and a 'give way' as something is obviously 'hanging out'. Or you can try a retrieval line until you're confident that the stent won't move unexpectedly (but you'll need something like my sugru 'bulb' at the end of the stent to give you something to grip on to when removing the stent. As for installing the O rings, I 'sew' them in place - you need something like a tapestry needle with a big eye to thread the O ring through (cut so that it's like a piece of string). Sew it through the stent to create a figure of eight. (When going through the stent for the first time (straight through - in one side and out the opposite side), leave a small amount of the back end of the thread (about 1 cm) 'hanging out'; Create the first loop of the figure of eight shape by threading back through the stent at right angles to your original passage, and the second loop going through at the same angle as your original passage but in the opposite direction. Make both of the loops rather smaller than the final result you want. when you've gone through the final time, cut the front end of the thread off, leaving about 1 cm hanging out at this end too. Then very gently pull the hanging ends back towards their exit holes and through them so the ends are inside the stent - the loops will then be the correct size, and the tightness of the hole created by the needle will hold them in place.)

I'm struck in the recent comments about how much the discussion has revolved around angles and how getting them in the wrong place can reduce the stent's effectiveness or just be really uncomfortable. The stent I use (there's a picture on p. 43 of this thread) doesn't have any moulding; it uses 'flanges' to secure it in place and I've found it completely reliable - no problems at all with migration in either direction. It also doesn't need a retrieval line. The flanges do make it a bit more challenging to insert (removal is easy) but practice makes perfect and after two or three times I could insert it and get it in place without any problem. So just thought I'd flag that there is an alternative to the 'angle' approach ...

@Reddy @wetguy13579 I'm really glad you're happy with your decisions and hope you're both looking forward to lifelong incontinence and diaper-wearing. Like so many others, I've followed this thread from the beginning and been fascinated by all the twists and turns. Overall, for me, I think, like @cathdiap and @dlnoir, the stent route is probably the best for me, at least for now. If I had a long-term partner who was as fascinated with and excited about incontinence as me I'd seriously consider the surgical route so we could spend our lives in uncontrollably wet diapers - but for now, I'll read on. Good luck!

Firstly, I don't think @Reddy is trolling - @BrownBobby met him when they both had surgery. Secondly, although I hate trying to second-guess someone else's thoughts and put words in their mouths, my reading of Reddy's comments (although I do find them confusing in places) is that he's frustrated about feeling embarrassed about being in diapers in the locker room more than anything else. If he weren't embarrassed when he went to the gym pre-surgery, that self-consciousness and embarrassment now is probably doubly frustrating. I guess it's just something that needs working through. There are probably people in that gym - and every other - who don't like getting changed in front of others and feel embarrassed about being naked. They will have developed coping strategies for that, whether it's using a private cubicle, artistically draping a towel or just brazening it out. So perhaps this is about adjusting to a new situation; perhaps Reddy didn't anticipate that he'd feel this way. I note that this discussion has been about this particular situation - and not about, for example, being diapered at work, or around family, and changing when out and about ...