PRAYING demons from hell come and take me already as I'd HOPE the PAIN ends upon death! JUST KIDDING LOL.....Been a LONG, miserable past 30-36 hours with an excess of pain )"headache" variety only this is NO headache, NO migraine....PAIN is specifically behind my eyes and right now, temples ( BAD sign) and I see 2 of everything. Took me 10+ minutes to type this much, so far. IF you close your eyes and us your thumbs to press IN on our eyes,. the pain is remarkably similar only from behind. LITERALLY feels something is trying t drive my eyeballs out of my skull. GOD this HURTS like HELL with "pulsations of indescribable pain" coming in "waves" at times. my left leg is bouncing up.down uncontrollably about 2x/second....used to be both legs CONSTANTLY when younger, now, this happens mostly when PAIN is beyond "tolerable:. Thinking of trying to , EAT 2 PILLS AND praying FOR SOME SLEEP!

Slept about 90 minutes and can feel I am well OVERDUE for a change! Now going to stand by my propane heater and crank it up a minute or 5 until I am literally too warm! Then change and debate....so  drink coffee OR do U see IF I can sleep some? I have had mini naps after eating 2 and once 3 pills to knock the pain down long enough to sleep 20-40 minutes, 

GOD I HATE MY body's wild overreaction to severe changes in weather and it has been IDENTICAL for almost 23 years now, and NO ONE has a clue WTF the cause is, ONLY treatment that works being IV Dilauded!

MAYBE i STay awake until my Senator's office is open as the HEAD ER Dr *REFUSES* to treat "headaches" with anything BUT Tylenol.  LITERALLY makes you wish you could drop dead! DEAD SERIOUS!

BTW....NOY cold, yet feel like I am freezing,,,,this is the same as it always has been , just with the PAIN, I also feel like I am freezing yet have no fever.I have 2 sweatshirts and a jacket on, under blankets, No matter, my body wildly overreacts to rapid drips in temperature same as the start of this on Jan 18 2004. HOPED the recent sinus surgery would help;;;;;;wrong again!

REALLY hate my life when this happens, which is COMMON from mid/late October (we had high 60-loe 70s, so it was good until Sunday night when it started abd BEYOND INDESCRIBABLE! 

Please forgive typos/mistakes as I CAN'T see straight....use spellcheck to get it as close as possible. This is fucking brutal!!
THIS is responsible for at least 50% of my hospitalizations only right now, I just get treated worse than dog shit and thrown out of the ER over all of my other Dr's objections!!!! May have to allow the :OLD: CptKirk to come to life and smack the shit out of this guy.

I am SO SICK OF PAYING FOR THE SINS OF OTHERS!

PS My Pain Mgmt Dr's KNOW I take 2, 3 pills at once but even then, won't last an hour. They have tried to have me admitted multiple times only they can't due ti a gaoing assgole in the ER refusing to even treat me. Patient advocates will NOT get involved.

I feel totally fucking trapped!

Again, please forgive spelling/punctuation. I CAN'T see well enough to read what I am writing. Normally, my xision, att least close up , is perfect,,,,,hope spellcheck akes this understandable. Took me 40 minutes to write this!

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"Joey's Pacifier" Updated: https://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?/topic/99763-joeys-pacifier/&page=2#comments

Been too long since i ordered diapers and that, I ended up losing a lot off the waist [cause of stimming and unmasking] and i am deeply looking forward to being padded properly again.