Gaylange Posted May 26, 2022 Share Posted May 26, 2022 On 5/25/2022 at 5:55 PM, DLJeff52 said: Gaylange! Great thoughts!! I just had my first "wait how did that happen" moment with finding a wet diaper indicator, having taken your advice to heart! Please do share your update! I love hearing about all the nuances we each navigate! It's not from me actually. I've heard this in a hypno file from Sarnoga or EMG. Pretty sure it's Sarnoga but I don't remember the name of file. It really works with me. 2 Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted June 18, 2022 Author Share Posted June 18, 2022 7 Months! I am very happy to arrive today at the 7 month mark. When I first started this journey, I don't really know that I had a goal. Finding DD really helped me explore a lot of other people's journeys and gain a belief that my desires, as "taboo" as most would consider them, are really just an expression of myself and my desire to be live at peace and be the best I can be to those around me. I can't thank enough those in this community who choose to share, encourage and authentically journey this road together. It has made an incredible impact on me and I hope my sharing does the same for others. Statistics Category Last 30 Days Trailing 30-60 days Last 180 Days Notes Days went #2 in Diapers 97% 91% 83% Now do all the time Days Wet at Night Woke Up, wet, slept 12% 24% 39% Continue to sleep deeper, less and less aware Unsure / Probably one unaware 46% 38% 32% If I didn't drink much before bed, then not sure if early morning is first wetting or not At least 1 wet unaware 68% 51% 37% First wetting is totally unconscious every time Average # Of Diapers / Day 4.5 4 3.9 Because of #2, a slight increase Average # Of Diapers / Night 1 1 1 Better Dry and Babykins Terry Plastic Pants Hypnosis 10% 5% 28% I've been listening to subliminals when I run Here are the standouts for this month. I'm surprised at my desire to continue #2 untraining. There have been sporadic times where I do not have the normal "warning" urge with #2. One time I was sitting down at my desk working and I stood up to go get coffee and poop just came out and filled my diaper with no warning or urge. I am allowing this to continue to happen no matter where I am and have brought everything I need to do quick changes. This morning I was ordering coffee at a coffee shop when it started happening again with only the briefest sensation before it started. I was able to go use there restroom and change and clean up without issues. I do take extra bags to prevent any odor for anyone after me, but found the whole thing easy to manage. My only concern is our family vacation where we drive for an extended period and what would happen in that scenario. I'll have to ponder that further. I believe I am starting to see more of the "spiraling" that @Enthusi and others have mentioned. I notice a consistent stress incontinence and much longer dribbles as opposed to urge based wetting. I've also had several occasions this month where I was legitimately "surprised" that my diaper was wet, not having had a conscious recollection of wetting or granting permission. I haven't changed any of my work habits, so this is all occurring in the same environment and conditions that I've been working in for the 7 months. I have also wet my pants 4 times this month. When I run, I choose not to wear diapers of any kind, but it is understood that if I need to wet, I'm not stopping it either. I run in a rural enough setting where it really doesn't matter what happens. However, the other day I was running and felt poop coming out. This was incredibly awkward as I again chose not to stop it. I was close enough to home to get back and deal with it, thanking my compression shorts some. Three other times I've wet myself in this scenario. I'm totally open to ideas on what people use as they are trying to stay active that won't cause massive chafing. Physical / Medical Skin Care: Calmoseptine continues to be my "go to". I apply heavily in the morning and evening before bed and this has kept things under control. I do apply butt paste after every #2 cleanup to prevent irritation and chafing and this has not been a problem. Thank you to everyone who has posted about being proactive in this area, because once you get a skin complication it is much harder to get rid of it than to prevent it. I have officially received "incontinence" diagnosis from my doctor. This has brought a piece of mind to me for sure. As it turns out, medications I have taken in the past and currently have been linked with "frequency incontinence and a lack of desire to use the bathroom." All this makes me wonder some if my desire is more medically linked than I ever imagined, but regardless, I am grateful for the diagnosis. Diapers and Clothing I am not enjoying the summer type heat, but managing none-the-less. I do like the Better Dry Day diapers, however, the plastic backing makes everything more sweaty, so I'm trying the Tena Super's for daytime wear to find that balance of breathability and soakability! I have increased my onesie wardrobe because I need to have some designated for when I know I'm going to be outside or out and public and sweat profusely versus those that I wear more casually at home. My first babykins double-terry lined cover got a small hole near one of the leg seams after four months of use. So $30 for 120 nights is $.40 per night to have the security of not leaking. Well worth it in my book as I don't really want to take on the cloth diaper logistics. Goals I am confident I will make it at least a year and will then revisit everything, if I even have a choice. I do have a desire to mess while I'm sleeping but suspect that is a ways off and I'm not going to do the laxative or artificial stimulation to achieve it. I am mentally excited and at peace with where I am and know that this is 99% of life regardless of untraining. The fact that going through this has helped me gain greater peace with myself is a tremendous blessing. I hope this somehow inspires others to explore yourself and allow the self-soothing that comes with this journey to be part of your growing health! 4 Link to comment
oznl Posted June 19, 2022 Share Posted June 19, 2022 Congratulations on 7 months! I reviewed my own notes at my own 7 month mark to confirm that you are indeed, significantly more “advanced” down diaper drive than I was at that time. At 7 months I was occasionally experiencing the “waking up wetter than I can remember being responsible for” and my persistent daytime leaking issues were abating in the face of my pee cadence shifting to a permanent “high frequency, low flow, low volume” pattern. I’m wondering if it is the abandonment of #2 control that is accelerating your performance, leaving folk such as myself stuck in the slow lane. I just can’t afford operationally to do that though. I’ve been a bit all over the place lately in terms of diaper dependency but was somewhat relieved (metaphorically and presumably physiologically) to wake up at 1:37am this morning to discover that at some point during my sleep, I’d thoroughly wet the cloth nappy I’d gone to bed dry in some 3 hours earlier. My bedwetting has NOT gone away, it just wandered off for a bit. I’m yet to wear out a single pair of those Babykins terry-lined waterproofs although their duty cycle is reduced by my use of cloth 2 – 3 nights per week. I have 4 pairs on rotation. Like yourself, I started out with the objective of trying one year and seeing what happens. There was nothing at the one year mark that inclined me to change course, nor the 2 or 3 year mark for that matter... I think I’m currently toying with a 5 year re-evaluation (skipping year 4) but these milestone objectives do seem to fade as I approach them. Enjoy the ride! 1 Link to comment
PuraVidaDip Posted June 19, 2022 Share Posted June 19, 2022 Congrats! On the running side, I use Tena plastic backed under my running shorts and apply Chamois Buttr to my inner thighs. This and yard work are the only time I don’t use diaper covers. I’ve run up to 4 miles no issue. Plus I crinkle ever so slightly which I enjoy. Might want to try that out. It makes running less stressful when you don’t have to worry. I’m following a similar path as you, with similar incontinence diagnosis etc. It’s been fun to follow your journey! Diapers make incontinence so much better, not having to worry, or search for a bathroom, unless you’re messy then of course you need to find one but at least it’s without the abdominal pain. For travel, it can be tough. Rest areas are great for changing. I’ve used bathrooms at restaurants, where I go in after the children etc. It gets more complicated solo parenting but not terrible. I was running late to pickup my kids from camp two days ago and went to the dollar general, but they couldn’t find the bathroom keys. I ended up changing behind the dumpster! It was embarrassing, especially because I saw a few people I knew in the store while I was asking for the key. I left before anyone could notice. I would not recommend changing in the open but alas it was my only option. Before that I went to the only gas station and the stall was occupied forever and again I saw people I knew! So that led me to the DG. I find that I must wear either Gary PUL or Northrshore trifecta pants at all times. They help prevent any leaks which inevitably occur for me multiple times a week. I went to an outdoor wedding yesterday, and I keep a camera bag with me. It’s not super hot with the pants. The camera bag can hold my DSLR camera and diapers, but not the used diaper, so that can be awkward to toss the used diaper (in a bag) in the trash after coming out of the stall. I didn’t drink much water, only liquor drinks so I only needed to change once. I tried to time my change when I thought less people may use it. Skin care is a must ~ an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure. I use Medline Sooth and Cool most changes and try and change my messy diapers asap. If I can prevent the rash, that way better than trying to get rid of it. Hope my 2 cents helps! Keep on posting! 1 1 Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted August 2, 2022 Author Share Posted August 2, 2022 8.5 Month Update First, an apology for not updating in so long. I'm a nerd. But I also feel like I have a creative side. So you can imagine the conversations that I have with myself! I have tried to provide a picture of what I feel like my "un-training" has become. I'm also thinking it's about time I change the title of my post from Journey to Diaper Dependency to Un-Training Journey as I'm finding myself more influenced by the likes of @Enthusi in a quest for loss of control as opposed to just mentally becoming satisfied with a mental "need" to have diapers on. (Not judging anyone else's journey, just clarifying mine!) As you can see, it is rather confusing, but here's what I notice: though my trend is always towards un-control, there are sections of time where my un-control "regresses". I suppose for some people it may not be a "regression" but lack of forward progress in which case this image would just rotate 45 degrees to the right, but I feel there is some blend of both stagnation and regression. The "phase" of each person's journey, or the amount of time that passes between peaks, is very different and can be a function of a lot of different things: physiological inclinations, mental, personal goals, etc. All that to say, I feel like in many ways I've finally "phased" out from my last update and have something more interesting to report than during the last month or so where it feels like I was just in a treading water state. For that matter, I suppose the "phasing" isn't consistent either, with greater time lapsing between phases the more time passes. Some might say there is a spiraling point, and I agree as once a phase begins, there is a rapid movement toward un-control, but then it seems to inevitably follow another period of waiting. Anyway, fellow nerds go ahead and chomp at this insanity, everyone else thank you for indulging me, now here's more of the update in observation form! Summary 1. I continue to wear 24/7, use BetterDry at night, combination of Tena and Abri-Form during the day. Tena's are cheaper, but I find them good to use when running or "in between" events like right before bed, or if I know I'm just going to be leaving the house in a short time or even in the morning as I'm getting ready for work. I also continue to be a big fan of the Babykins Doube-Terry plastic diaper covers as they have a durability and leak protection that has me never leaking when I sleep, even when I'm on my sides. (Again, I get nothing for mentioning these products) 2. I continue to pursue both #1 and #2 loss of control. I believe and am finding that relaxing my #2 sphincter is helping with general weakness progression and it really is no longer a big deal to clean up. I'm following some of the diet suggestions in the 12-month plan and that has added to the simplicity of relaxing sphincter and the regularity of #2 events. I even have dreamt of myself going #2 in a diaper, which I consider perverse progress! I am noticing that there is a generally weakening of my sphincter which I most notice in how easily gas now passes without my being "held" back. Also, I have been able to always allow #2 to happen in any situation, public or private, without holding it. I have found that plastic Better Dry's plus a plastic cover do wonders to helping cover the odor, along with generous amounts of lavender baby powder and strong deodorant. I've had one occasion where #2 happened around 4am. I didn't notice any odor (had the double Terry-lined plastic covers on over BetterDry), and my wife didn't notice even when she woke up (and she has quite the smell sensitive nose). I've been practicing this for almost three months since I added #2 to my un-training and I am going to continue until the new year before I "test" for any measurable change in control by "trying" to stop it. 3. On the urinary side, I have a number of observations to add. A. I now am wetting consistently at night for the first two wettings without waking up or any awareness. I will still wake up for the third and fourth (morning) wettings. I don't really pay much attention to this anymore as I figure it is at least 12-18 months from other accounts that complete night wetting is possibly even attainable, so I'll treat anything earlier than that as encouraging progress. B. I notice that occasionally I have "unauthorized" and non-stress incontinence related dribbles or leaks just when I'm even sitting. There are times when I will just feel a small dribble of urine escape into my diaper that I can't explain either by a shift in posture that would be attributable to stress incontinence or related to a void that might be post-dribble. C. There are times where I feel my ureter/penis somewhat pulsing or contracting as if it was trying to release urine, even when there is nothing to release. I tend to feel this most in the morning or at other times when I might be lying on my side. Best I can describe it is like a fish opening its mouth to breath every couple seconds, but in my case nothing is coming out. D. Most of my "spontaneous" or "lack of permission" wettings are in the morning. I try to stay hydrated through the day and experience another "round of these type of low volume, effortless wettings in the afternoon. Usually don't have as many in the evening hours. E. I increasingly notice a voiding pattern that is not urge induced, but just releases with less contraction of my bladder. More of a void that, while there is a consistent stream, is not correlated to any sensation either immediately before or during the void. F. There are an increasing number of blur moments where I don't remember when I actually wet. Maybe I'm just getting older, but I do believe this is the blur of your mind beginning to just accept that when there is any urge it is "ok" to go. Just yesterday, I put a diaper on, then 30 minutes later was going to change into a more durable Abri-Form for an outing, and I went to take off my diaper to "save" for another time, but when I removed it, noticed it was soaked and had no recollection, even in that 30 minutes, of having wet. 4. Skin Care. I now consistently apply Butt Paste and the calmoseptime regularly. I use the Lavender Johnson Baby-powder as well and liberally use for EVERY change. I am also shaving my groin area regularly and the combination has resulted in no rashes of any kind over the last month. 5. Clothing. I mentioned the diaper covers I'm using, but still also daily use the REARZ onesies to provide "lift" and support for diapers while out and about. I do wish there were a couple more color offerings than the white and black, but other brands are either all cotton (and thus shrink unpredictably and significantly) or made with less quality. Any suggestions on other affordable REARZ like onesie options are appreciated! 6. Mental. I am still in a great mental space. I have started using 24/7 subliminals again as I fall asleep at night. I find them helpful to relax and fall asleep and imagine they can't hurt in the progression! I am committed to the year timeframe I gave myself last November and am on the verge of extending that to two years with a shift in goal from diaper dependency to loss of control. I know this is nuanced, but in my mind it makes sense! 7. Exercise. I'm now resigned to the fact that I need to wear protection when running and I refuse to give up running. I've had more accidents (almost all #2) when running. When I say accident, running stimulates #2 and I REFUSE to tighten my sphincter so it comes out. Yes, embarrassing and very messy and not recommended. So, I've now found that the Tena ProSkin is a must have for running. It is much less durable, but light weight, breathable, doesn't chaffe and allows me to have protection for those accidents. As long as I change, clean and shower immediately upon finishing I have managed to not have skin rash or irritations. Overall, however, I have not been exercising as regularly as I want. This is a goal for the next season to increase my activity level and lose 10 pounds before the end of the year. 8. Business Travel / Public Experiences. I am now very comfortable with the flying process for business or leisure. My bag is now ALWAYS inspected because I have baby wipes and skin products and enough diapers to last if my checked bag doesn't make it all in my carry-on. Note: I mentioned to the TSA agent I had all my incontinent supplies in my bag and was sure that is what alerted the XRAY technician and she verified that for "medical" reasons you can have more than 3 oz in those bags. I had a 10 oz butt paste that they let me take when they saw all my diapers and creams. I have no problem pulling out a diaper on the plane and heading to the bathroom if needed, but am also needing to change less on planes. I only need to change if I #2 as I use the overnights and plastic covers while flying. I do this as a courtesy to my skin and to those around me. No one has said anything and I quite frankly don't care what they think. 9. Goals. Continue to hold to my goals of relaxing sphincters at all times, regardless of where I am or if it will leak. Exercise 3 times a week, improve diet to soften stools and regularity while losing 10 pounds. Support others on this forum as best I can. Thanks and feel free to ask any questions! 6 Link to comment
zzyzx Posted August 3, 2022 Share Posted August 3, 2022 12 hours ago, DLJeff52 said: 5. Clothing. I mentioned the diaper covers I'm using, but still also daily use the REARZ onesies to provide "lift" and support for diapers while out and about. I do wish there were a couple more color offerings than the white and black, but other brands are either all cotton (and thus shrink unpredictably and significantly) or made with less quality. Any suggestions on other affordable REARZ like onesie options are appreciated! While I'm not sure you will consider this "affordable", I tend to use Tykables oneses and "snappies" rompers. If you are looking for color, sometimes they have solid colors in something other than white. However due to quickly things do or don't sell, I believe they aren't planning to bring back some of the solid colors they sold in the past any time soon. And for white, I have found the ABU onesie / tee-shirt reasonable. I haven't had a (significant) problem with shrinkage on either product. I do run on light/moderate perma-press heat and DON'T run on high heat in the dryer. 1 Link to comment
BabyCat2 Posted August 18, 2022 Share Posted August 18, 2022 Wow i love how you broke it down will be definitely following ❤️ Link to comment
TJ-DL Posted August 19, 2022 Share Posted August 19, 2022 @DLJeff52 I'm one of those pesky lurkers that rarely logs in to DD but I had to reply to this thread. I want to say thank you, to you and all those others keeping track of your untraining. You absolutely inspire me to follow in your footsteps, though I'm not ready yet, I know that in time this is my true calling and in the near future I hope to pursue a similar journey to yourself. Keep up the amazing work! Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted September 29, 2022 Author Share Posted September 29, 2022 10.5 Months I can't believe I'm only 1.5 months away from a full year of 24/7. I must say, I'm quite proud of myself for that accomplishment, as I traditionally have been "victim" to binge/purge or impulsive cycles and finally had the wherewithal (and support of this type of a community) to discipline myself enough to get this far. Overall Summary I am mentally in a place where I feel diaper dependent. When not in a diaper, I wet my pants (yes somewhat voluntarily, but I don't like to hold it at all...hate the discomfort of urge and prefer to just wet or mess). I am physically experiencing a profound pelvic floor muscle deterioration especially as it relates to bowels. The warning or urge preceding #2 has declined dramatically in intensity and the amount of time between urge and release is very short. Yesterday, I was in the car, felt the urge and it started happening. Being in a seated position delayed the release, but the moment I started to stand up to get out of the car, it was an instant, automatic release. Granted my tummy was upset for some reason which made it all easier, but there was no way I was holding it. I have handled incredible messing events on planes, cars, restaurants, running, etc and now have a confidence that no matter when it happens I can handle it. Messy, yes, but manageable quite certainly. I am now a big fan of dude wipes as they are one of the flushable brands. I also have a couple plastic bags with me so that I can either store the dirty diaper in my diaper bag until I can dispose of it or so that I can put the dirty diaper in the bag into a public garbage can without leaving an annoying odor for others. I am pursuing a diet in line with the 12-month program that seems to be helping in the process. Everyday I have: yogurt with flax seed, oatmeal for lunch, an apple, almonds, and something with olive oil. I will say yogurt has in fact reduced the potency of the odor over time. Similarly, my time between urge awareness and urinary release is now approaching zero. Even as I was just typing this, I began peeing, but the urge was so feint, I didn't even recollect it until I noticed I was peeing. None of it was front of my mind. At some level, I assume my brain is still giving permission for this to happen, but it is more like a cameo appearance in a movie and nowhere near the central plot of my thinking. I can't remember the last time I "flooded" my diaper, it is the familiar frequent uriniation of little amounts with a lot of post dripping that occurs. Occasionally, and mostly while sitting, I'll have a "spontaneous" leak that I can't understand because it just happened without stress incontinence or urges being present before I feel the leak occur. This usually happens more in the morning and when I'm hydrated. Nighttime wetting continues in its erratic pattern. When hydrated fully or properly, my first wetting or two will occur without me even stirring. Usually the last wetting or two is where I will regain some form of consciousness immediately before or as I begin to pee. If I am not hydrated, then I will usually wake to pee around 5am or so and I am more aware when this happens. I think the key is to stay hydrated throughout the late afternoon and evening ours so that there is more of a rhythm of peeing as you sleep. I don't subscribe to the drink tons of water right before bed practice. I will also say that I have had a dramatic increase in the number of dreams in which I am diapered, have a wet diaper, am messing my diaper or otherwise wetting myself. My Diapers and Outfits Tykable Snappies are BY FAR the best onesies I have found in the market. The fifth snap and material used are exceptional and last a very long time with little to no shrinkage when washing. They are also by far the most expensive for plain onesies, but in my opinion worth it. The RearZ onesies continue to hold up well, but over time do shrink a little from wash. They are a great value and I tend to wear these when I'm just around the house and need the diaper support. I have given up on boxers or compression pants for everyday where as the onesies are so much more reliable and easier in my opinion. Babykins double Terry-clothed plastic pants are lifesavers. I can't remember every leaking as I use these over my nighttime diapers. Easy to wash, easy to dry, long-lasting...all of which mean I don't need a pad on top of my sheets. I still have one under the sheets over the mattress for a "just-in-case", but have gained total confidence that I will not leak which has made it easier to pee at night in any position I sleep. Daytime Diapers I have found the Tena Proskin Supers to be a great value for daytime wear when you know you will be needing to change within a couple hours. They are almost half the cost per diaper of the Abena Agri-Form M4s that I also use during the day. I use the Tena's for example in the morning when I wake up. I know I will likely go #2 within two hours of waking up, so I use the Tena in anticipation of that before a shower. I will also use the Tena if I'm making a change from an M4 and know I need to leave to go somewhere in a shorter amount of time. The Tena's have proven reliable for exercise and in combination with compression pants, do not cause chaffing when I run. I often choose to run with no diaper and just pee during exercise which is not as big a deal as I thought it would be. I do wet my pants to reinforce the behavior I am striving for, but it is never a big deal as I just pause and stretch to allow the urine to fall straight to the ground through my shorts instead of down my legs. The M4 does give longer lasting coverage so I use that during the day when I'm working at the computer for 4-6 hours and know that I will only need to change at the end of that time. Nighttime Diapers The BetterDry still wins in my book. I've tried just about all of them and for the wicking and cost per diaper, BetterDry continues to stand out above the rest. In combination with the Babykins covers, I have zero worries of leaking. I will also use the BetterDry if I know I'm on a flight or going out in public to sit somewhere (theater / restaurant) for extended time. I do this because (a) it allows longer coverage and (b) if I have a #2, the plastic backing gives longer odor protection as I work to go and change. Where I buy diapers My veteran status, auto ship and store credit per purchase make LLMedico the best place for me to buy both the M4 and the BetterDry diapers. Carewell seems to have a better deal on the Tena line and I buy my Proskins there where they also have military and auto ship discounts that make these diapers incredibly affordable. Next steps My goal was to be diapered for 12 months. I have 1.5 months left on that goal. I'm now announcing a new goal. I am going to extend another 12 months with the expectation that I will be (a) #2 incontinent and (b) be conditioned to pee freely and instantly without conscious awareness. I state this specifically with respect to urinary as I don't think I see myself ever really being incontinent in the medical aspect of the word, but I do think I am seeing my mind retrain to ignore and allow the body to pee freely when the signal is sent that it is a need. My goal is to not be mentally conscious of the event if that makes sense. Why? Good question. I like this life, but can't fully explain why. I like the comfort of padding and diapers now...I can sense a serotonin release if you will when I put on a clean diaper. I like sleeping through the night without getting up, I like the community, I like the feel, I even increasingly like the "little" aspect involved. I'm sure it still serves as an escape if you will, but I like that too and think it is actually a healthier form of escape than I may have chosen to pursue in the past. Appreciate all your encouragement and love your feedback or comments! 7 Link to comment
Enthusi Posted September 29, 2022 Share Posted September 29, 2022 @DLJeff52 thanks as always for your updates. Please keep them coming! From what I can gather the biggest shift seems to be that you identify as as someone who’s incontinent. This is not a small deal. In fact it’s critical you start seeing yourself as someone who lacks the bladder control needed to live without diapers. Side note, this is the area that working with a professional hypnotist helped the most with for me. All of the available files, especially the free files focus on uncontrollable wetting. They don’t get to the core issue of identity, which is why they have middling results. But I digress. 1 Link to comment
PuraVidaDip Posted October 13, 2022 Share Posted October 13, 2022 @DLJeff52 nice update! The tykables snappies are the best. I love reading all the details and we have a lot in common I think. My journey is progressing along similarly to yours. I’m at 9 months now 24/7 but will use the toilet only if extremely convenient (getting out of the shower and BM attacks) or while I’m changing with up upset stomach and rash. I’ve travelled a bunch for weeks at a time (family trip to Europe, family trip Skiing, Camping with friends, multiple overnights with friends, 3 Business Conferences, many close client meetings) and have navigated everything well. I’m not as religious as you to not holding it but just not caring as much if you will and relaxing when I think about it. I use a NorthShore supreme for work, an incontrol hybrid for if I’m casual, and have been experimenting with larger than rearz medium diapers for nightime. I got cloth tenas in Europe because that’s all I could find and they work great for exercising! I don’t wear plastic pants exercising but wear NorthShore pants medium during the day and large at night. I always use a booster unless I’m wearing a Trest. Just went to Changing Times Diaper Company yesterday and got a bunch of samples for nightime diapers. The booster helps a lot I think with leaks. CDTC is in Las Vegas like 10 mins from the strip and the owners are amazing. I got some pajamas and other items that were more little than before and I’m enjoying it. This sounds totally different than you but my wife also encouraged me to buy a pink frilly baby dress to wear with my pink diapers I sometimes wear so that’s interesting! Like you, Cleanup from BMs can be nasty but overall no big deal. I use the NorthShore wipes and almost always change over a toilet. I’ll try and shake or scoop some out with TP if close quarters bathroom. I use TP for the first few wipes and switch to wipes. I’ve heard that the flushable wipes can still clog up plumbing especially in septic pumps if you weren’t aware. I usually just toss my wipes into the diaper and single or double bag it in a heaven scent. The diet thing is so important. When I’m not traveling I always eat oatmeal in the morning, a yogurt or apple snack, and for lunch bananas almonds and pure cranberry juice mixed with water. I eat whatever for dinner but definitely eat less red meat now. My weights still the same because I need to be more careful with sweets. Keep the updates coming! You can do this!! The finish is close and we support your new goals!!! Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted October 13, 2022 Author Share Posted October 13, 2022 12 hours ago, PuraVidaDip said: This sounds totally different than you but my wife also encouraged me to buy a pink frilly baby dress to wear with my pink diapers I sometimes wear so that’s interesting! PVD, Thanks so much for the response!! It does help, somewhat vainly, to hear from people after posting updates so I really appreciate you taking the time to respond! Yes, we are definitely kindred spirits, except that I am INCREDIBLY jealous of your wife's support. I'd love to make these same purchases and wish I could express myself more in this way, but alas, not currently in the cards, so I'll live vicariously through you! I suspect someday we will meet and share a fine beverage recounting our travails! I'm encouraged to complete the year and excited for what lies ahead! Stay strong (or weak as the case may be) in your own pursuits! Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted November 25, 2022 Author Share Posted November 25, 2022 ONE YEAR! I DID IT! I met my goal! I can't believe it...I'm not really a goal finisher, more like a great goal starter, so to not only finish something I started, but to do something that requires an insane amount of perseverance, money and situations laden with embarrassment is one of my greatest accomplishments in life (both sarcasm and truth mixed together!). My updates used to be easy. Track the number of days you did this or didn't do that. Comment on the physiological changes and describe the diets, patterns, hypnosis and other actions I took along the way. Depending on who you ask, all those metrics are either helpful or irrelevant given the uniqueness for both motives and goals we each pursue in this space. The further along I progressed in my journey, the less the metrics seemed to matter, except one: Did I stay diapered 24/7 and never to "hold" either #1 or #2. I definitely succeeded in the 24/7 category with the exception that every now and then I would not wear a diaper and "Intentionally" wet my pants as a perverse way to enhance my commitment or "need" to wear diapers. There were also likely a handful of times throughout the year where I intentionally went #2 in the toilet because situationally it would have made me late or caused an issue related to work that just didn't need to be created. So I basically am giving myself an A+ for achieving this goal. For those of you that find it somewhat selfish that I am giving myself such a perfect score, take heed that as an Enneagram 2, I've learned that even acknowledging that I have needs, let alone being at peace that I can decide if a need has been met satisfactorily is in itself a huge growth goal! I have been struggling somewhat as to how to structure my ONE YEAR update, but have finally settled on two approaches. First, I'll give you a brief summary of my mental, physical and emotional status after one year of wearing diapers 24/7. Then I'll try and come up with what I think may be FAQs based on messages I get or posts I see hit the forum. Feel free to ask any questions I may have missed along the way! Physical Status My bladder is definitely WEAK. I think I probably have 75-125ml capacity. I definitely have little sensation AFTER I start urinating, it just feels like my diaper is getting warmer and fuller. I HATE feeling any sense of pressure that I have to pee. The instant the slightest bladder pressure signal is sent, I crave release. There is a great sense of calm and relief that comes with ridding my body of that sense of needing to pee. I should say, however, that this sensation is less the norm and more the exception. For the most part during the day, I will just release almost automatically and without much pressure or intentional thought. I say it this way because I have learned that one of my sphincters requires consent to release. I would say this "consent" is increasingly becoming a conditioned response that defaults to "always yes" and I can't remember the last time where I consciously stopped what I was doing to direct my body to release. Instead there is a very short time between a slight twinge of need to pee and peeing. Most often, if I am doing something else at the time, I don't even have an awareness of a decision and my first indication that something happened is that I'm wetting my diaper. As for nighttime, I consistently wet the first time without waking up. I would say the 'norm', however, is that I will wake up around 5am and realize that I need to pee and instantly release before going back to sleep. I think I've only had a couple of nights where I went to bed and didn't wake up until my alarm went off in the morning. I treasure these nights, but they are few and far between. With respect to #2, I know my rectal strength is a fraction of what it used to be. I would say that at least once a week I'm surprised with a release of #2 that happens with no pressure sensation or warning. My first warning is the realization that I'm messing my diaper. For other times that I more regularly go #2, there is zero time between the sensation of need to go and release. There is almost never any "pushing" on my part at this point, but rather a natural expulsion that slowly but steadily releases into my diaper. Plastic backed diapers definitely help reduce odor, as does my diet, but regardless, I will go whenever and wherever I need. I have changed in grocery stores, airports, airplanes, amusement parks, rest areas, even at relatives homes. I change quickly enough where the odor never really becomes a distraction to others and have only had a handful of times where I needed to "sit" in a messy diaper for more than 30 minutes before I could find someplace to change. Flushable wipes are a key to have on hand as well as other plastic bags that you can use to secure messy diapers for disposal. I always have a diaper bag/backpack on hand if I am at someone's home and keep my messy diaper in a double plastic bag in my backpack to dispose of later, but otherwise immediate disposal has proven relatively simple. I used to be really worried about someone seeing me dispose of a diaper in public, but now I could care less. I mean I'm not brazenly flashing my diaper, but people in public are generally too self-obsessed to care about what someone else is throwing away. I expect that if I continue for a second year I will likely loose total control of #2 just based on the trajectory this journey has produced and how many more "surprise accidents" have occurred with #2 relative to #1. Mental / Emotional Status The first mental layer I have around all this is that I need diapers. I need them in my mind for three reasons. First, I HATE the sensation of having to pee or hold it. It has become a deep mental condition that at the first sign, I will desperately release immediately and without care as to where what or why. The second is that I no longer have a desire to correct this. I have had fleeting thoughts around retraining, but there isn't a desire, at all. Life is too busy, I don't want to work that hard, and quite frankly, I enjoy not having to get out of bed or worry about bathrooms, EVER. Third, my accidents with #2, moreso than my weekend bladder, are a constant reminder that if I am not wearing a diaper I am likely to mess my pants. I really would rather not mess my pants, so a diaper it is. All of those combine to create a mentality that I "Need" diapers. Do I need them in the sense that if I wasn't wearing them I would helplessly pee myself? Likely not, but am I more likely than not to wet myself if I had to hold it for any measurable amount of time? Possibly to probably. I don't find myself tracking days or nights that I'm wet at all in the last three months, but rather have become accustomed to wearing diapers and just making it a part of my routine. I will say I absolutely LOVE the comfort and warmth of a diaper. On the rare occasions that I was changing or going through a "wet my pants" exercise, the moment I was able to put on a new diaper, I could feel my blood pressure drop and the comfort and feel of the diaper against me is noticeably pleasing. I will only add here, that my personal journey is laden with other desires that have only become more prevalent as I have gone on this journey. Since my early teen years, I've craved to be a female. Everything from the clothing, the physical body, the mannerisms, appearances and actions of a woman have enthralled me. I have cross-dressed on an off throughout my life, I've come close to pursuing various steps in this feminine direction, but life, fear, and situations have kept me from it. I have no idea if it is the diapers and the clothing that I wear with and for diapers, but my desire to explore femininity has exploded in the past three months. Again, I know this is my own deal and not connected to a diaper update per se, but found it relevant only in the sense that for me there is an interplay here that is emerging as a result of my steadfast pursuit of diapers. Perhaps others that have a melange of mysterious desires will see their own pursuit of diaper dependency product a similar, parallel growth in desire. Miscellaneous It is funny how this section to me is almost an afterthought, where in my earliest posts, I saw it as the most significant to provide an update on! 1. I still prefer Abena's and BetterDry diapers and I still prefer LLMedico for cost and service reasons. I also will use a less absorbent Tena diaper for day use because I can purchase these diapers at about $.55/diaper versus $1.05 for the Abena and $1.67 for the overnight BetterDry. 2. I wear onesies every day and don't have any male underwear at this point. The REARZ onesies are great for day use and are still the best value on the market. 3. I use Babykins Terry lined plastic wraps over my nighttime diapers and have not had a need for a mattress cover since I started using them. They are bulky but GREAT at keeping any leaks from the diaper off my bed. I also find them very durable (4-8mos life) and cost effective. 4. I am committing to a second year of 24/7. @Enthusi has been a great inspiration to me in this regard. I'd love to get a simple yearly summary from him about his 5 year progression to just see how the 5 year plan looks relative to my first year! I believe that I am at greater peace wearing diapers and see no reason to change course and am not sure how successful I'd be if I tried because mentally I really do not want to. FAQs 1. Do you use creams to keep your skin healthy? I used to use Calmoseptine multiple times a day. Now, however, I have chosen to have laser treatments to remove hair from my legs and groin. This has dramatically reduced the skin irritation. I shower frequently and use the cream as needed as opposed to multiple times every day. I have had NO skin problems thus far. 2. What is your diet? I am trying to lose weight and facilitate loss of control. I eat a lot of yogurts with flaxseed or oatmeal with flaxseed for breakfast or lunch. I have a lot of Almonds and drink a lot of Cranberry juice. I also make olive oil a regular part of my diet. All of this has been mostly for #2 and I have noticed a difference as my stools are much softer which allows for a natural release. It has also dampened the odor, but not removed it by any stretch. 3. What about your doctor? Have you pursued testing of any kind? I did visit my doctor and honestly shared that I was having episodic challenges controlling my bladder during both day and night. I allowed the testing to occur as the doctor suggested, never challenging or recommending anything. His own conclusion was that I likely suffered from some type of nerve issue that could be allergy or medicine related. He concluded that I had a functional incontinence with exact source yet to be determined and suggested I return in 6 months for a reassessment. 4. Aren't diapers obvious and loud? No, onesies dramatically help to keep noise down and diapers where they belong. I have only had to move up one size on my waist for pants and find that compression pants over diapers can be helpful I short-term situations (longer-term could produce chaffing). The cloth backed diapers are by far quiter, but both can be worn in ways that do not make it obvious at all that you are wearing a diaper in public. 5. What has been your most embarrassing situation? I pooped my diaper unexpectedly while warming up to play golf. It was very bad and I needed to change quickly to avoid odor. I didn't really succeed as I had to go through the locker room to get to the bathroom. I can't tell you how many wipes I had to use as a shower was not possible at that point. 6. What suggestion would you make for long-term diaper goals? You should budget about $5 a day on diapers. That translates to almost $2000 a year. If you can't or don't want to commit to that basic cost, then it probably isn't right for you. You should expect that no one else will "get it" and you need to only do it because you want to do it for yourself. You should expect to have days where it will be a nuisance, but just like any other goal, those moments test your resolve not your motive. This community is essential for encouragement and feedback. I couldn't do it on my own and posting my journey has helped me continue on! 6 Link to comment
Little Belle Posted November 25, 2022 Share Posted November 25, 2022 Wow @DLJeff52 you've been on quite the journey! Thanks for the update I've loved following your progress and you write so well and give all the right details. I am impressed by your dedication to your goal - I would also give you A+ ? You went 24/7 about the same time as me so it's been interesting to follow you throughout my first year in nappies. I was fairly incontinent to start with so I've been mindful of drawing any comparisons but surprisingly you've tracked very similarly to me. I've been actively avoiding bowel incontinence and I think the fact you've been allowing yours to diminish has definitely speeded up your progress to your goal. That and your A+ effort generally! I 100% agree with you on the sense of comfort and safety nappies bring and I love them as much today - if not more - than on day 1. I hope you also find peace and clarity with your gender identity - isn't life incredibly complex and fascinating?! Keep us posted on your second year - I am sure it will be lots of fun! 2 1 Link to comment
~Brian~ Posted November 25, 2022 Share Posted November 25, 2022 @Little Belle The irony is that I agree with you as well! Nappies give me The same security, and I can say with 100% certainty I'm glad that I have them! I also love them as much as you do! it takes a big man to be able to admit something that he doesn't want to admit, because he's afraid of something or afraid of what someone would say because of his admission. I have come full circle all the way around, because I know that wearing diapers is the best for me. we're not talking about being lazy or anything like that, but it does make sense for me to wear diapers because it is easier for me to handle. far too many times people don't understand don't understand the security and the ability of A or to give you the support you're looking for. Some of us want it for physical support, some of us want it for emotional support, and some of us like it because that reminds us of what it was like to belittle, and the ability to just let it go whenever you feel it. whatever reason we find that we like diapers, they're all good reasons. diapers do have A reason to exist, and people do need them. i'm just glad I am now part of the particular subset of people that do: and I am man enough to admit that I like them and that I want them! many times, there's been situations where I Have second guessed myself all through my life. There's times when I feel like For example diapers feel good, or they smell good, or something like that. I keep on having to tell myself Or had to tell myself that it was wrong for so long, and I kept on having to repress those memories and put them out of my mind, for fear someone would think of me as a crazy old fool period now I don't have to worry about that: I have admitted that I love diapers and that I like them, and that they feel good, and I can't change the Change the way I am, nor would I. there's a lot of times in my life that I wish I could have gotten to this point three to four years before now, but the Times weren't proper for me to do that, and now I have everything I need because as they say good things come to those who wait. Right now I can most likely say that I am making my progress! by this I mean that if I have to go to the bathroom, I can just release. there are many times when I have to be careful where I release, but I am confident that I can release whenever necessary. i'm even getting to the point where I can wear a diaper without fear of anybody finding out, and it's more comfortable for me than not having One on. Part of the problem is that people think people think diapers are bad, and that is one of the stigmas we have to break wide open and smash! most people don't understand how diapers can help us in many ways. being disabled, I understand that, and having friends and neighbors and even my brother being disabled, I understand that better than anyone else, because I've been there and I've walked in that person's shoes. Even as a young child, I had to wear diapers on and off through rehab stints, because they just didn't want me to have to jump up and go to the bathroom. Most other times I was able to use a urinal, but when I'm in rehab I guess they just wanted me in diapers for my safety. Diapers also help my emotional health as well and my and my security. Now that I have a diaper on, I am not worried at all about what may happen, because it will happen. I don't have to worry about somebody finding making a big deal of it, and even if they did it's no big deal to me. the one thing that made my decision for me was the number of times during 2019 I would have accidents and I wouldn't have any control period I knew exactly what the heck I needed, and I needed it fast, and I also had to realize that it's my body making changes, and that is enough reasoning alone to wear diapers. I don't want to play games with my body, and I'm not gonna let my body win on this one, even if I got what I wanted out of the deal! so many times, my body decides for me what it wants to do, even though I wanted to do other things and it might not be able to do those things all the time period wearing diapers is giving me the security I need so I don't have to worry about something happening that's out of my control period the idea of wearing a diaper is because you don't have control, and that's part of the things that people ask me all the time. They'll ask me what what is it like to totally be incontinent? I tell them basically that it's like having someone he giving you a ton of liquid to drink. you're thirsty, so you keep drinking it and drinking it and drinking it. Your body is like having a gas tank, and once your tank is overflowing, you will get rid of what you don't need. I tell people that it's similar to being A 2 year old who doesn't have any control, and he just goes and goes and goes Until he stops. You can't stop once you start and you won't be able to stop until you empty yourself. if you don't have control, that's the way it feels! People ask me all the time how I deal with it: I deal with it because I must deal with it and because I want to deal with it this way. there's nothing wrong with the way that we decide to deal with our situation, although sometimes it can be inconvenient at times, and sometimes you end up having to change In funny situations or in places where you don't normally have to. i've even had to wear a diaper home when I ended up with a big mess because I could not afford to change at the time period when you get used to having a diaper on like that and you're used to doing it, it's a lot easier to be able to accept it and be able to deal with it with no big deal. What I will do is allow my body to make the choices it needs to make. This is why I wear a diaper all the time period I don't have time for my body to argue with me all the time, because I have things that I have to do and I have places I want to go when people I want to see. most people that I deal with understand my reasoning and my rationale for wearing diapers, although some things I may not disclose to even those I trust. The thing that I like about diapers is it gives me the security and the ability to think on my feet and say I can handle anything now. The most important thing is that you have to accept who and what you are. this may take longer for some people than others, and it might take something happening to that individual make them come to that realization. that doesn't necessarily mean what happens to them is bad, they just have to have some sort of defining light bulb moment that says hey this is what is actually true and I can't change it! it takes a big man to be able to admit that he needs the help, and I have admitted that: diapers have given me the the strength and stability that I need in my life to be able to move forward: very Put me in a down position, and I'm not gonna let incontinence stop me from being the man that I want to be. sure I wear plastic backed diapers, but Even if I wasn't wearing diapers, I would have to make a decision one way or the other what to wear underneath. I have solved my problem, because regardless of what I release, I let my body release it, and I don't feel guilty about doing it. Sometimes it feels good to have a diaper on if you know what I mean, and it just feels right. for some reason it just feels right! Brian 1 Link to comment
oznl Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 Congratulations @DLJeff52 on your first whole year of 24/7! I must say you've progressed considerably further down the "incontinence" path than I have after nearly 4 years. I'm still trying to work out if I'm curious or jealous ? I have a sneaking suspicion that my attempt to hold on to #2 control really does put a brake on things here but I don't think the world nor my beloved is ready to deal with a messy oznl so I'll just plug on from where I am: marginal daytime continence and intermittent bedwetting. I both recognise, and am amused by, your complete and utter lack of regret with respect to your decision. One of the tropes of this place is that somebody embarking on such a journey will be warned, lectured or preached by certain others as to folly of their choice and how they are likely to find themselves simultaneously and irreversibly wracked by regret, incontinence and nappy rash by the following Wednesday. What seems to happen in reality is that those who can't deal with the fall out (no pun intended), swiftly self-select themselves out of this race and just go back to enjoying their diapers recreationally, wiser but not sadder. Those (such as yourself and possibly myself) who DO persist, their main regret is that they didn't start sooner. Looking forward to year #2 updates. 3 Link to comment
Kif Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 Congrats on reaching your goal, Jeff! I find it hilarious how similarly our results have progressed as well, despite that I've had to stop/start a few times to deal with gender confirmation surgery. The physical reasons have differed but still tracked similarly, and the mental ones *for sure* have been overall the same. I found myself chuckling with how you described the comfort you felt putting a diaper back, for example, or the mundaneness of the FAQ section (though it is also a reminder of how much you / we grow during this process!) ? 7 hours ago, DLJeff52 said: With respect to #2, I know my rectal strength is a fraction of what it used to be. Just out of curiosity, have you tested how long you can last while standing up? I wouldn't be surprised if you found you *couldn't* hold it like me (not that it practically matters at this point). 7 hours ago, DLJeff52 said: I will only add here, that my personal journey is laden with other desires that have only become more prevalent as I have gone on this journey. Aaaaaaand this is where I realized I was trans last time ? Either way, if it's just cross dressing or turns out more, it's *fantastic* that through all these experiences you've opened up more to yourself! Wishing you the best on that journey as others have pointed out here ? 3 Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted November 28, 2022 Author Share Posted November 28, 2022 On 11/25/2022 at 5:06 PM, Little Belle said: Wow @DLJeff52 you've been on quite the journey! Thanks for the update I've loved following your progress and you write so well and give all the right details. I am impressed by your dedication to your goal - I would also give you A+ ? You went 24/7 about the same time as me so it's been interesting to follow you throughout my first year in nappies. I was fairly incontinent to start with so I've been mindful of drawing any comparisons but surprisingly you've tracked very similarly to me. I've been actively avoiding bowel incontinence and I think the fact you've been allowing yours to diminish has definitely speeded up your progress to your goal. That and your A+ effort generally! I 100% agree with you on the sense of comfort and safety nappies bring and I love them as much today - if not more - than on day 1. I hope you also find peace and clarity with your gender identity - isn't life incredibly complex and fascinating?! Keep us posted on your second year - I am sure it will be lots of fun! Little Belle, Thanks so much for your comments and support! Appreciate your encouragement and please let me know about your own adventures! On 11/25/2022 at 11:28 PM, Kif said: Congrats on reaching your goal, Jeff! I find it hilarious how similarly our results have progressed as well, despite that I've had to stop/start a few times to deal with gender confirmation surgery. The physical reasons have differed but still tracked similarly, and the mental ones *for sure* have been overall the same. I found myself chuckling with how you described the comfort you felt putting a diaper back, for example, or the mundaneness of the FAQ section (though it is also a reminder of how much you / we grow during this process!) ? Just out of curiosity, have you tested how long you can last while standing up? I wouldn't be surprised if you found you *couldn't* hold it like me (not that it practically matters at this point). Aaaaaaand this is where I realized I was trans last time ? Either way, if it's just cross dressing or turns out more, it's *fantastic* that through all these experiences you've opened up more to yourself! Wishing you the best on that journey as others have pointed out here ? Kif! Thanks for your support! Been encouraging to follow your journey as well. Stay strong! On 11/25/2022 at 8:59 PM, oznl said: One of the tropes of this place is that somebody embarking on such a journey will be warned, lectured or preached by certain others as to folly of their choice and how they are likely to find themselves simultaneously and irreversibly wracked by regret, incontinence and nappy rash by the following Wednesday. What seems to happen in reality is that those who can't deal with the fall out (no pun intended), swiftly self-select themselves out of this race and just go back to enjoying their diapers recreationally, wiser but not sadder. Those (such as yourself and possibly myself) who DO persist, their main regret is that they didn't start sooner. Oznl, Thanks so much for all your support over the last year! I think your assessment is correct. And while I don't judge anyone's journey in this space as they are all so unique and to do so would make me the biggest hypocrite of all, I agree that if you just read the dire warnings you may never even start a journey that ultimately is each individual's decision. That said, I can also appreciate that the "glory" or "fantastical expectations" of losing control can be tempered over time with the reality of diaper changes and other life situations! Here's to us and here's to you! 1 Link to comment
~Brian~ Posted November 28, 2022 Share Posted November 28, 2022 @oznl I would never try to "dissuade" Anyone in their journey or on their journey. the only thing I would tell them is the one is the one thing that I always tell them. people think that being incontinent is some sort of easy task, or that it is going to be all fun and roses. we all know that this is not true each each one of us has their own things that they deal with, and each one of us has our successors are failures and time and times when we need to possibly reassess. The only thing that I would tell them is that once they go down this road, it becomes harder and harder and harder to retrain yourself, and the only other thing I would say is that once they become or they think they will become incontinent, they have to make changes to their lives because they have to understand that they will be wearing diapers 24/7, so they will be changing them at any time anywhere. Other than that I would support anyone who wants to embark on this journey. far too often there are people around us in the world who may not support our decision, and that is unfortunate. There are people that need diapers for medical reasons or they need them for psychological reasons or comfort reasons or to make themselves feel like they are whole. I keep saying that there's nothing wrong with the way people wear diapers or use them, so people should not be too worried about it because Is wearing diapers happens and people use diapers every day. it's just everybody else's attitude outside of the community which makes it hard for us, because there are so many people who would probably make Light of us wearing diapers, and then pick on us and do other crazy things. our lives are our lives our business is our business and if we want to wear diapers as our underwear that is our choice. Also people that don't understand why we do what we do, they don't have any idea The struggles that we have to follow or that we have to deal with period they have no idea what kind of feelings that we have to deal with also. they have no idea that most of the time diapers help us in ways that they can understand. All they see is that we're wearing something that should be ascribed to a baby, and that is not true. Adults do wear diapers, and we do have adult babies and adult kids and others designations, so there are people that wear diapers. Some of them wear diapers also because of some trauma that they've had happen in their lives. in my case, I can't tell you how much better I feel because I can wear diapers and because I am wearing diapers. I don't have to hide what or who I am anymore, and I don't have to worry that someone is going to go tell on me somewhere! and I can also tell you that I'm more comfortable with decision than ever before. I don't have to run every single time I feel the need to use the bathroom. How many times has someone had to get up to go to the bathroom, and then they sit in the bathroom for over an hour, and then they came back And they can't get to sleep? that's happened to me on several occasions. I don't like this, and I'd rather be sleeping in bed rather than being on the toilet all night. Plus wearing a diaper is a way to say: OKI give in, without giving in and in that Way, all I'm saying is that if I have to go to the bathroom, the diaper is there, and it just feels good to be able to release that. it relieves a lot of stress and strife and problems in my head and allows me to concentrate on things I need to concentrate on, rather than things that I shouldn't or that I don't have to. I don't know how much stress I've had in my life that just seems to be too ridiculous, and diapers help me to deal with it. a diaper implies permission for it to be used. When you put a diaper on a baby, you expect him or her to use the diaper, because that is they do. When a diaper is used, you simply change the diaper. when. when you have a lot of stress and you have to let it out, the easiest way to eliminate a lot of stress, is to let it go. a diaper allows you to let it go, and It feels so good to be able to just release, because everything you release in a diaper I think of it as a Having a bunch of stress and things that you don't need in your body or on your mind, and when you release in your diaper that is what you're doing you're releasing all the stress and all the bad things that your body does not need into your diaper. you simply change the diaper and throw it away, put a new one on after cleaning up your business. People May not understand why we do what we do, and they might not understand the intricacies Oh what make us who we are. people simply say or simply think that because we're adults and we're not babies and we don't have medical reasoning to wear diapers, that we're just fetishist or that we're doing something wrong. People are fetishists, but there's nothing wrong with us wearing diapers, there's nothing wrong with us using diapers, there's no problem in us acting like babies and enjoying those particular feelings or living that particular lifestyle. the problem happens when somebody picks on us and makes light of our particular situation by blabbing it all over the place, and then somebody takes something that is innocent or something that is necessary, and turns it into something that would be considered really bad period adults have the responsibility to make sure that They're doing whatever they're doing in an appropriate manner an appropriate place an appropriate time, so it doesn't draw undue attention to themselves. do not do this would put themselves in a lot of trouble, and that would end up opening the doors and you have a bunch of people all over you, and then you'd be in judgment of whole bunch of people, and that's not comfortable at all. I can tell you that since I made my decision, I feel awesome about it! there's nothing better than to have a diaper on 24 hours a day! sure you have to change yourself and you have to clean up the mess and you have to be able to be ready whenever it happens, but the stress level is almost 0 when I have a diaper on because I don't have to worry anymore. A baby doesn't have to worry when it wets itself or it messes itself, because someone is going to come in and take care of it. I take care of it myself, but the stress level has gone down to 0 because I don't have to worry about it any more that's the point. If people would stop worrying about why the people have to wear diapers or why they feel that they want to or whatever, and they just understand that people do it, that would be a heck of a lot easier period of course there are gonna be people that are gonna ask you or me why we would do what we do or why we like what we do or ask us questions about other aspects of our lifestyle, and that's normal. i've run into a lot of people who don't bad an eyelash, cause they understand that people wear diapers, and I even have friends that understand that people like diapers. those are the type of people who understand why We do what we do or why we are what we are. I am not going to change who I am, and I'm not going to deny what I am to anyone! some people would say that are lifestyle is weird or types of words to describe it I. I don't care about that: the thing is I am I am who I am I am what I am, and I'm proud of what I am and who I am and where I have been and how I'm going about my life. part of your life means that you have to understand that you make your decisions based on what is best in your mind. you only live life once and you might as well have fun. I have to wear diapers 24/7 because of my condition, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I can't enjoy having a diaper on, or enjoy the feelings that a diaper elicits! people don't understand that the feelings that a diaper gives you are part of the draw. i'm sure everyone on daily diapers understands that because they are here, and they deal with those type of feelings as well. many people may not feel the same way as I do, that's what makes it unique because each person has their own story and their own reasons For doing what they're doing, and enjoying what they're enjoying. that's what makes it cool because each person is unique and can tell you stories about it. I have cerebral palsy and I'm a disabled individual. i'm also a diaper lover and I am incontinent. i'm not gonna let incontinence run me into the ground and make it sound like I'm such a bad dude that it's impossible to deal with. and continence is an issue that you can deal with period my feelings are things I can deal with, and diapers help me to do that in many ways. The more people that understand that people have reasons for wearing diapers that may not be medical, but may have other reasons, the better shot we have of making people understand that it's mainstream that people wear diapers! diapers are not some secret thing That is so secret and so bad that no one wants to talk about it, but that's the way it has to be in some cases because people would get the wrong ideas then we'd have an issue. I don't: I wear them every day and I enjoy every minute of it. if I have to wear a diaper I might as well enjoy myself exclamation Brian 3 Link to comment
Kawaharu Posted November 28, 2022 Share Posted November 28, 2022 If you don't have a legit medical reason for wearing diapers, expect people to question you why your wearing diapers. Expect people to ask you questions why your wearing diapers and why you have a need for them. Many who want to wear them, should really READ the fine print before they embark on their journey. People like me who have a legit medical reason to wear diapers, it's pretty much normal for us. It's normal for us to be diapered and wearing them all the time. In my case, I have a medical disability that requires me to be in diapers 24/7/365. What many people don't seem to understand that being in diapers is not all rose's and sunshine that people claim to be. It's NOT easy being kept in diapers permanently and it's alot of work. Link to comment
~Brian~ Posted November 28, 2022 Share Posted November 28, 2022 29 minutes ago, Kawaharu said: If you don't have a legit medical reason for wearing diapers, expect people to question you why your wearing diapers. Expect people to ask you questions why your wearing diapers and why you have a need for them. Many who want to wear them, should really READ the fine print before they embark on their journey. People like me who have a legit medical reason to wear diapers, it's pretty much normal for us. It's normal for us to be diapered and wearing them all the time. In my case, I have a medical disability that requires me to be in diapers 24/7/365. What many people don't seem to understand that being in diapers is not all rose's and sunshine that people claim to be. It's NOT easy being kept in diapers permanently and it's alot of work. @Kawaharu Is right when she says that being in diapers is not all Rosie and wonderful and it is a lot of work period people are going to question whether are going to wear diapers for whatever reason, Is Par for the course I suspect. people that have medical reasoning for wearing diapers are going to wear diapers all the time: As such they are going to be wearing them, and they are going to be wearing them everywhere doing everything that everyone else does. the only difference is that they are going to have to stop and they are going to have to determine where the best place to change would be or they're going to have to have their bag to be able to change Whenever they go somewhere. I've had people tell me that because I'm in a wheelchair, it must be really easy, it must be really cool to be able to go fast and be able to pass people and be able to spin around at a minute's notice and be able to do doughnuts and all this stuff. Yes it's fun to be able to do some of that stuff if you are fooling around and you can have fun doing it. the problem is, that there are many people that are in wheelchairs for reasons that are medical in nature, and that none of their fault. this means that through no fault of their own they are in a wheelchair, They might be in a really snazzy looking wheelchair, that might be the coolest thing on the block, and that is awesome, but then people don't realize that they're always drawbacks to being in such a snazzy piece of equipment, being able to do all the things that they can do, like being able to go fast or be able to do things. Like she said, diapers are a fract of life for anyone who is incontinent. they have to be able to find a place to change, they have to know that the places that they go are accepting of that particular part, because you need to be able to have a place to change and do it safely and Do it in a way that will allow it to be sanitary. When you're in a diaper 24/7, the reason is because of your medical status or because you wear diapers for other reasons. I've had a few situations where I absolutely have to make a change: I eat something that doesn't agree with me, and I know for example that Grease likes to screw with my stomach. When that happens, I quickly realize that, and then I have to find a place to change period luckily for me the time that happened was when I was at work, and I had full access to the bathroom and could actually make a full change without too much of a difficulty. you Still have to make sure that whatever you're doing you're cleaning yourself up and taking care of your trash in an appropriate manner so it's not a hazard to somebody else. you also have to make sure that when you're changing that your diaper goes on the right way and it's tight enough and all that stuff. i've had it happen where the diaper wasn't exactly put on the way I thought it was and then I found out at a later date that there was more trouble than I wanted. There's always a downside when you have to make a change on the road, and you don't have the right setup. luckily i'm able to deal with these things and I have ways to handle them, but it is kind of hard without being able to drop your pants and be able to take your diaper off and be able to deal with it that way. an accessible bathroom with a change table would be optimum, but very many places that I know of only have the size changing tables for a baby, and unless you're going to a big airport you're not going to be able to do what you wanna do. I don't mind wearing diapers at all: the best thing that ever happened to me was making that decision, because I was having accidents and it was uncomfortable, it was very unsightly, it stunk a little bit, but I dealt with that particular situation in Professional caring way. I want to make sure that I'm taking care of myself, and I don't want to worry if I'm going to have an accident when I go somewhere, nor do I want to be embarrassed when I do something, or I have to use the diaper because of the situation. the diaper is there for a reason, it is medical in my condition, as it is in hers, and people have to realize that wearing diapers is not all that it's cracked up to be, and as long as they're willing to accept the fact that they were have to make some major changes to the way they deal with things, they will be fine. It also helps when you have to For example use the bathroom in the middle of the night. how many times do many people get up in the middle of the night just to walk across the hall to the bathroom to be able to do whatever it is they do, and then they end up doing their business, they end up pulling their pants back up and they walk back to their bed and they jump in and they fall asleep. this happens many times over many many years, and it is the same idea. it gets to the point where we can do it all by ourselves, without even thinking about it. When you have diapers on, you actually have a reason to use them. You may have to adjust the way you deal with things, or how you take care of it, but you have a diaper on, so you can use it for that purpose. ever since I've had wearing diapers, it is a lot easier for me Because I don't have to worry about jumping out of my chair and running across the hall, and then trying to figure out pulling my pants down real fast so I don't make a mistake and have a mess all over the place. if you have a diaper on, you can make the mess in it and then clean it up., it is not that bad, but when you have the major bull outs, that can be a pain. we both know by default that if you're going to wear diapers you're going to make a mess and you're going to have accidents, and you're going to be using them. how you deal with the way You use them is important because you want to make sure that whatever you're doing it does not affect you in ways that would be detrimental. imagine having to change a diaper every time you pee or mess: if you are just going in and using the bathroom and doing your business, and then you walk out, that's a heck of a lot different than if you have to use a diaper, you walk in, you have to take the thing off, you have to clean yourself up, you might have to change your clothes, then you have to pick up all the mess and you have to pick up all your clothes bag it put it away and walk out of the restroom. if you have a major blowout you have to do all of these things. if you have a minor little thing where you just change the diaper you can be in and out in less than 5 minutes if you're good at what you're doing. people have to realize that you give up the Speed and reliability to just walk into the bathroom do your business and walk out. it's a lot different when you have to change a diaper and you have to go through all the steps making sure that you have all your wipes your gloves and everything else that you used and you put that into a dirty bag, and then you tie that bag off and you take care of all your dirty clothes then you put it into your bigger bag and you walk away. Additionally, things can happen when you don't want it to, or when you least expect it to, and as we both know, sometimes you end up going when you don't want to, where you don't want to, and you're not prepared for it. sometimes this stuff happens just like life: you have to be able to deal with many situations and some of them are not Happening at the best times or when you think they should be. the good thing about a diaper is, if you can use it, and then you can change Yourself later, that can be an advantage, but eventually your diaper will be exceeding capacity or near capacity, or it'll be dirty and you must have to change it, so you have to be prepared. you have to have all of your changing supplies with you, and if you need clean clothes, you need to have those available to you so you can change quickly. this and other things make diaper wearing a little bit more difficult for those that may not be used to it. so people that want to wear diapers 24/7 because they want to, because they make them feel good, and all this other stuff, you may end up finding that you are using them a lot more, so you must be prepared for what happens, because it is a major life changing event. Once you do this, and you, and you workout all of the kinks and all of the things that make it difficult and you have a system, it is far easier to deal with because you know what you want to do when things happen. even in you have the best system, things happen and it is not all shine in Roses, and I can tell you from experience that if you have to go home and you have to change a messy diaper, that can be a pain in the butt Because you have to clean yourself up, you have to clean up the floor, and you have to do other things to make sure that wherever you're changing is sanitized. People that know about this Have to make sure that this is done every time they make a public diaper change. Brian 1 Link to comment
JanusLight Posted November 29, 2022 Share Posted November 29, 2022 @DLJeff52 Congrats on hitting the one year mark! That's amazing progress and a huge accomplishment! I've dreamed for many years of trying incontinence training but just never had the chance due to other responsibilities. I'm at a point now where I'd like to start trying again for nighttime incontinence. I bought a case of diapers and downloaded some hypnosis files, but there are still a few things holding me back from making the leap. Curious whether your sleep quality impacted by the training? I'm worried that my sleep suffer due to the discomfort of being in a wet diaper at night and I'll be constantly waking up from the wet / cold feeling. Did you eventually get used to it and do you sleep better now or before your one year journey? Also, do you think it's possible to become trained for just nighttime incontinence, or is 24/7 pretty much a requirement for incontinence training to be successful? Link to comment
oznl Posted November 29, 2022 Share Posted November 29, 2022 16 hours ago, ~Brian~ said: @oznl I would never try to "dissuade" Anyone in their journey or on their journey. the only thing I would tell them is the one is the one thing that I always tell them. people think that being incontinent is some sort of easy task, or that it is going to be all fun and roses. NEVER had you in mind there on that charge Brian ? 1 Link to comment
Hannah YMS Posted November 30, 2022 Share Posted November 30, 2022 Congratulations, @DLJeff52, on one year. Feels great doesn't it? Keep up the good work. On 11/25/2022 at 6:59 PM, oznl said: Those (such as yourself and possibly myself) who DO persist, their main regret is that they didn't start sooner. That and my slow as molasses progress. 1 Link to comment
DLJeff52 Posted November 30, 2022 Author Share Posted November 30, 2022 On 11/28/2022 at 7:29 PM, JanusLight said: @DLJeff52 Congrats on hitting the one year mark! That's amazing progress and a huge accomplishment! I've dreamed for many years of trying incontinence training but just never had the chance due to other responsibilities. I'm at a point now where I'd like to start trying again for nighttime incontinence. I bought a case of diapers and downloaded some hypnosis files, but there are still a few things holding me back from making the leap. Curious whether your sleep quality impacted by the training? I'm worried that my sleep suffer due to the discomfort of being in a wet diaper at night and I'll be constantly waking up from the wet / cold feeling. Did you eventually get used to it and do you sleep better now or before your one year journey? Also, do you think it's possible to become trained for just nighttime incontinence, or is 24/7 pretty much a requirement for incontinence training to be successful? Janus...thanks for the encouragement. I would say that in the very early stages my sleep at night was restless, but it wasn't due to wet/cold feeling. BetterDry seems to be great at wicking moisture, maybe if I was in cloth diapers this would have been more of an issue? I was more concerned about leaking. Also, I would consciously wake up EVERY time I had to pee, so that was problematic as I had read you should drink a lot before bed. Now, though, I don't worry about dinking a ton of water before bed and I seem to have a rhythm of waking up around 5am for my last "wetting" (not sure why but whatever), so my sleep is much better. I'm by no means the expert on nighttime only incontinence as others have made this their sole focus. My only encouragement would be that for either nighttime or daytime, you still have the physiological aspect of "consent" from one of your two sphincter muscles. The ability to "reprogram" this muscle to quickly allow release without a prolonged mental approval process will just take time. Hope that helps! Link to comment
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