do you fell shame in your wetting

[Baby Girl Sarah]

1 hour ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

Great so that means I’m eventually going to have to wear diapers forever I leaked last night too!

( Smiling warmly )  Feel free to get back to us after say oh a year of  having to wear  24 /7   EVERY day 365 days /year. dear  

Careful what you wich fore because  you may one day actually get it    ?    

[Danielgartin6993]

11 hours ago, Baby Girl Sarah said:

( Smiling warmly )  Feel free to get back to us after say oh a year of  having to wear  24 /7   EVERY day 365 days /year. dear  

Careful what you wich fore because  you may one day actually get it    ?    

I just don’t want wet bedsheets anymore I’m embarrassed when I leak in my unprotected bed 

[oldwetter66]

         Just stop teasing each other it is not nice 

 

[Baby Girl Sarah]

7 hours ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

I just don’t want wet bedsheets anymore I’m embarrassed when I leak in my unprotected bed 

Ï believe  you  misunderstood  me dear im NOT teasing nor  do i whant you to feel bad.  What i was trying to do is  to  was to  let you know  that   wearing  diapers  24 /7  is NOT the   bed of roses  that you  portrayed  it to be.   

Im VERY sorry  to have to read  that you indeed  have  this  problems dear   and if in ANY WAY SHAPE or FORM  have hurt  youre feelings PLEASE  understand  it was  NOT  my meaning ?

I COMPLETELY  understand  how bad  you must  feel from both youre current condition and what the doc  said  to you And i have  101 %    RESPECT  for  youre feelings       

Pm`nd  you  as well   so we can sort this out  privately                 

[Baby Girl Sarah]

7 hours ago, oldwetter66 said:

         Just stop teasing each other it is not nice 

 

I havent in ANY WAY SHAPE   or FORM  meant this  as teasing  as i would NEVER  do this  so its all a  misunderstanding  i have both out here  and also more private explained my self  more clearly  in this matter to said  person between me and him.     

Im now leaving this thread  to prevent further  escalating  or misunderstanding ANYONE feel they  need to  come at me  feel free to do so by Pm    and i will be   ready to explain my self  further as clear as i can   to you all as well.             

[stevewet]

21 hours ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

Great so that means I’m eventually going to have to wear diapers forever I leaked last night too!

I have been wearing nappies for over 7 years now.

 

8 hours ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

I just don’t want wet bedsheets anymore I’m embarrassed when I leak in my unprotected bed 

If you wet at night your bed should have a water proof cover over the matress.

[incondl]

The question was if we feel shame. My answer is a resounding no. Wrapping your head around it in the beginning can be hard but after you learn to properly manage it, it becomes simple.

[rusty pins]

If you can't help it, then why should you be ashamed?  That is what I have been saying.  Does a person in a wheelchair feel ashamed because he has a spinal problem?  A person who wears a hearing aid because he can't hear without it?  Likewise a person who wears glasses because without them he can't see very well?  Each of these people can in fact be bullied by others for their situation, like being called "Four Eyes" for wearing glasses or "Baby" because he wets the bed at night.  This can be upsetting when kids and teens do it but especially bad when ignorant adults do it or make comments thinking it's funny.  It's natural to feel upset, angry or down when you get teased by someone, but you should never feel ashamed for anything that is beyond your control.

[Danielgartin6993]

3 hours ago, stevewet said:

I have been wearing nappies for over 7 years now.

 

If you wet at night your bed should have a water proof cover over the matress.

My parents think I’m deliberately peeing my bed when I do this they don’t know my nerves are damaged but the doctor knows 

[stevewet]

42 minutes ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

My parents think I’m deliberately peeing my bed when I do this they don’t know my nerves are damaged but the doctor knows 

How come your parents don't know about your problems.

[Danielgartin6993]

49 minutes ago, stevewet said:

How come your parents don't know about your problems.

Because they don’t know adult bed wetting exists and I can’t pee in a public bathroom unless I do it sitting down, my dad says to pee like a proper man but I’m worried I won’t aim correctly and wet my pants and when I got my hip replacement surgery I had a huge accident it’s embarrassing and I need to have the doctor do a urine retention test to see how much urine my bladder can hold but I’m worried I’m going to leak 

[oldwetter66]

20 hours ago, Baby Girl Sarah said:

Ï believe  you  misunderstood  me dear im NOT teasing nor  do i whant you to feel bad.  What i was trying to do is  to  was to  let you know  that   wearing  diapers  24 /7  is NOT the   bed of roses  that you  portrayed  it to be.   

Im VERY sorry  to have to read  that you indeed  have  this  problems dear   and if in ANY WAY SHAPE or FORM  have hurt  youre feelings PLEASE  understand  it was  NOT  my meaning ?

I COMPLETELY  understand  how bad  you must  feel from both youre current condition and what the doc  said  to you And i have  101 %    RESPECT  for  youre feelings       

Pm`nd  you  as well   so we can sort this out  privately                 

    yes wet bed sheets suck I hate them too that is why I wear A cloth diaper and plastic pants to bed!

[Danielgartin6993]

2 hours ago, oldwetter66 said:

    yes wet bed sheets suck I hate them too that is why I wear A cloth diaper and plastic pants to bed!

I prefer wearing disposable diapers to bed because they keep me dry  even after I’ve peed in it

18 hours ago, rusty pins said:

If you can't help it, then why should you be ashamed?  That is what I have been saying.  Does a person in a wheelchair feel ashamed because he has a spinal problem?  A person who wears a hearing aid because he can't hear without it?  Likewise a person who wears glasses because without them he can't see very well?  Each of these people can in fact be bullied by others for their situation, like being called "Four Eyes" for wearing glasses or "Baby" because he wets the bed at night.  This can be upsetting when kids and teens do it but especially bad when ignorant adults do it or make comments thinking it's funny.  It's natural to feel upset, angry or down when you get teased by someone, but you should never feel ashamed for anything that is beyond your control.

I have spinal problems as well, mostly pain, and I need eyeglasses because I have poor eyesight and yes I occasionally wet the bed a little bit 

[Danielgartin6993]

21 hours ago, stevewet said:

I have been wearing nappies for over 7 years now.

 

If you wet at night your bed should have a water proof cover over the matress.

Other people think I’m deliberately peeing my bed when I do it and don’t realize my nerves get damaged from cerebral palsy I know some people need a little protection at night because how the heck do people expect us to hold onto all of that pee and sometimes the urge to go potty is so strong we sometimes wet our beds a little bit and we can’t rest because of it, I’m unprotected and I am embarrassed because of it and I reached out to Depend and they said to wear a Depend Fit Flex to bed, in case I have to go pee really badly that I can’t hold it , my bladder isn’t that strong but it isn’t that big so if i wet it’s not a big leak but it’s big enough to cause my bedsheets to get wet  and Depend Fit Flex should help 

[Danielgartin6993]

And also when I tell my father I need to go pee he tells me to hold it in but that’s part of the reason why my bladder is so weak and I sometimes can’t hold it I’m always worried about wetting my bed because I will wet the bed if I hold it in, I peed the bed when I got a total hip replacement surgery in 2008

[Wookiebaby]

On 1/17/2019 at 5:15 PM, Little Christine said:

Welcome to the world of Benign Prostate Hyperplasia aka BHP (at least that better be it, have it checked to be sure it is not prostate cancer). It is like flies on a manure pile. You will have a bit of leakage now and then and you will have a FREQUENT wicked urge to go. and when you do go, it will not be like a racehorse. If I were so inclined I would have an excuse to at least wear rubber panties and some kind of protection 24/7/52. That is all quite normal

I do not feel shame when I pee however when I mess it's a different story because more people can usually tell that you have to wear these things. Even in the hospital when I'm asked if I need changing I don't like that either. My friend suggested I come here to try to find comfort in it.like a couple of you this is been a lifelong thing and I still get embarrassed about it. Probably because I was teased relentlessly for it. and no I don't really understand why somebody would want this it's not fun, especially when you have diaper rash there's no breaks for me.

[Danielgartin6993]

10 minutes ago, Wookiebaby said:

I do not feel shame when I pee however when I mess it's a different story because more people can usually tell that you have to wear these things. Even in the hospital when I'm asked if I need changing I don't like that either. My friend suggested I come here to try to find comfort in it.like a couple of you this is been a lifelong thing and I still get embarrassed about it. Probably because I was teased relentlessly for it. and no I don't really understand why somebody would want this it's not fun, especially when you have diaper rash there's no breaks for me.

I have incontinence too but I just get a little wet occasionally because my bladder doesn’t cooperate and is too small and can’t hold a lot of liquid and leaks when I’m sleeping and I can’t hold it in, I have to pee frequently due to cerebral palsy and neuropathy , and twice a night, and  I’m embarrassed when I leak at night because I don’t have anything to wear to protect myself and my parents are ignorant about it but most people don’t think adult bed wetting exists I am 25, and I’m considering  wearing a Depend Fit Flex to bed just in case, that way I’m not embarrassed about having an accident because I had to wear diapers before for bed wetting until the age of 14 and still had the occasional accident until I was 18 until two years ago, I already requested a free sample pack and hopefully they’ll protect me from bed wetting accidents and my doctor said my nerves are damaged forever 

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

3 hours ago, Wookiebaby said:

I do not feel shame when I pee however when I mess it's a different story because more people can usually tell that you have to wear these things. Even in the hospital when I'm asked if I need changing I don't like that either. My friend suggested I come here to try to find comfort in it.like a couple of you this is been a lifelong thing and I still get embarrassed about it. Probably because I was teased relentlessly for it. and no I don't really understand why somebody would want this it's not fun, especially when you have diaper rash there's no breaks for me.

I guess for those who want it, it is some kind of momanticisation of something. I have two memories of being diapered as a toddler and it was no big deal one way or the other. I cannot understand DL at all and AB, from what I can gaterh, is adult notions superimposed upon infancy or toddlerhood. Nothing that I remember of being a toddler is about "being loved" or "security". Those are way to abstract. Mostly I remember physical sensations, being a bit curious or being a bit scared. I do understand "Little". The other two have no discernable "story" in the form of a larger identity.

I really have no comment about IC since I am not and since it is not a choice one makes. I am pretty sure I would hate it. That is why i rarely comment in such forums unless it is something very general or on something I do know about. It is also why I think "incontinent Desires" belongs in the "Lifestyle" section. I suspect that those with such desires get off a bit on the humiliation. Well, they did not live it in real life.

You might seek some kind of behavior modification for your embarrassment problems. it seems like something that would respond to one of the earliest form of behavior modification; Systematic Desensitization. This is used to treat phobias. You probably understand there, since it is not by choice, embarrassment is pointless but emotionally, you haven't "gotten it" since there were other things already strongly in place. SD breakes the cycle that has now become automaticized. What you can do in the meantime is one or both of stwo things. Both of these require practice alone so that you imagin yourself in the situation where you get imbarrassing. 1. Thoughtstopping. Pay attention to waht you are thinking before and when the embarrassment occurs. When you have it down. run through it again and when the thought sequence starts to kick in (this would be done by a therapist ina  more formal setting) say, very loudly, "STOP!!". Do that until you kind of hear it in your head. This has some shock value which breads or weakens the sutomatized link to the embarrassment. Then run through it in your imagination. 2. when you feel the embarrassment setting in, take several quick deep breaths about 10 in less than 20 seconds; a second being the time it takes to say "One Mississippi", be careful not to hypervetallate or you might pass out. There are sensors in the body that  measure the relative amounts of Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide in the blood. When this is done right, they send this data up the chanin of coand and that forces physical relaxation of the body, which breaks the "uptight chain". They are not a cure unless the situation is very mild, but they will provide relief and as a form of  "pre-treatment'[ will make the ultimate cure provided by professionally used Systematic Desensitization or Rational-Emotive Thrrapy much easier. RET is one of the forms of "cognitive Therapy"

[Wookiebaby]

1 hour ago, Little Christine said:

I guess for those who want it, it is some kind of momanticisation of something. I have two memories of being diapered as a toddler and it was no big deal one way or the other. I cannot understand DL at all and AB, from what I can gaterh, is adult notions superimposed upon infancy or toddlerhood. Nothing that I remember of being a toddler is about "being loved" or "security". Those are way to abstract. Mostly I remember physical sensations, being a bit curious or being a bit scared. I do understand "Little". The other two have no discernable "story" in the form of a larger identity.

I really have no comment about IC since I am not and since it is not a choice one makes. I am pretty sure I would hate it. That is why i rarely comment in such forums unless it is something very general or on something I do know about. It is also why I think "incontinent Desires" belongs in the "Lifestyle" section. I suspect that those with such desires get off a bit on the humiliation. Well, they did not live it in real life.

You might seek some kind of behavior modification for your embarrassment problems. it seems like something that would respond to one of the earliest form of behavior modification; Systematic Desensitization. This is used to treat phobias. You probably understand there, since it is not by choice, embarrassment is pointless but emotionally, you haven't "gotten it" since there were other things already strongly in place. SD breakes the cycle that has now become automaticized. What you can do in the meantime is one or both of stwo things. Both of these require practice alone so that you imagin yourself in the situation where you get imbarrassing. 1. Thoughtstopping. Pay attention to waht you are thinking before and when the embarrassment occurs. When you have it down. run through it again and when the thought sequence starts to kick in (this would be done by a therapist ina  more formal setting) say, very loudly, "STOP!!". Do that until you kind of hear it in your head. This has some shock value which breads or weakens the sutomatized link to the embarrassment. Then run through it in your imagination. 2. when you feel the embarrassment setting in, take several quick deep breaths about 10 in less than 20 seconds; a second being the time it takes to say "One Mississippi", be careful not to hypervetallate or you might pass out. There are sensors in the body that  measure the relative amounts of Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide in the blood. When this is done right, they send this data up the chanin of coand and that forces physical relaxation of the body, which breaks the "uptight chain". They are not a cure unless the situation is very mild, but they will provide relief and as a form of  "pre-treatment'[ will make the ultimate cure provided by professionally used Systematic Desensitization or Rational-Emotive Thrrapy much easier. RET is one of the forms of "cognitive Therapy"

Wow, this actually helps quite a bit. However I do suffer from general anxiety due to the fact that I can't see very well and therefore cannot discern faces, and it's hard for me to figure out exactly what people are thinking. therefore I obviously assumed more than what's actually going on but I am totally going to give this a try thank you ?

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

43 minutes ago, Wookiebaby said:

Wow, this actually helps quite a bit. However I do suffer from general anxiety due to the fact that I can't see very well and therefore cannot discern faces, and it's hard for me to figure out exactly what people are thinking. therefore I obviously assumed more than what's actually going on but I am totally going to give this a try thank you ?

I have the same problem as you but I do not have the anxiety. What I have suggested works well against anxiety until you can see a professional, who you should tell all of what you told here. My eyesight is such that I could have made the same call in the Saints-Rams game as the refs and have a legitimate excuse. Maybe your eye doctor can help with that general anxiety thing. Medical professionals should have links to things that help

[Wookiebaby]

I am currently registered with the cnib and I have being since I was very small. And when I was a child nothing like this really bugged me even when I was teased at school. however things began to change in high school when I noticed my real limitations and how fast are my peers were moving as opposed to me. plus people in general will just lie straight to your face even if you can see properly and I do get a ton of help. my phone is the best thing that has ever happened to me, I wish this technology existed when I was younger it would have made school a whole lot easier LOL. I do currently see a counselor and he understands why I have anxiety about this particular thing. because of the way I was raised I was basically told that I was no different from anyone else and therefore could do anything and be anything, I believe that until high school.Unfortunately visual impairment isn't my only disability there's four or five other things that stop me living a normal life.unfortunately there is also been times where nurses or other people would ask me directly why I have incontinence who changes me and all that jazz. So instead of answering 20 questions, I choose to do a lot of things myself and I'm usually very independent. which is kind of a killer because there's no way I could be completely independent I need help with many things, even basic things like shopping. But that's not what this discussion is about I do feel shame when I mess and that's what this discussion was about thank you for that comments and the suggestions I will put some of them into practice for sure I feel truly respected and listen to hear thank you very very much.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Krazy]

I wet because it's part of the role-play and my mummy says I am banned from using the toilet when I have got my nappy on! She also says I am a good boy for wetting my nappy because that's what nappies are for! 

All part of a soft, caring and loving scenario and role-play.

I also love the warm, heavy and squishy feeling of being wet. Wetting is good, no shame in it, so enjoy it

[Danielgartin6993]

6 hours ago, Krazy said:

I wet because it's part of the role-play and my mummy says I am banned from using the toilet when I have got my nappy on! She also says I am a good boy for wetting my nappy because that's what nappies are for! 

All part of a soft, caring and loving scenario and role-play.

I also love the warm, heavy and squishy feeling of being wet. Wetting is good, no shame in it, so enjoy it

Do you wet while sleeping I’m considering wearing a Depend Fit Flex to bed because I’m a little incontinent because I leak a little bit of pee while sleeping sometimes 

[Krazy]

15 hours ago, Danielgartin6993 said:

Do you wet while sleeping I’m considering wearing a Depend Fit Flex to bed because I’m a little incontinent because I leak a little bit of pee while sleeping sometimes 

I am a fussy sleeper and get too hot at night, so its boxer shorts only. I have worn over night on a few occasions thought and wet during my sleep.

 

[Danielgartin6993]

2 hours ago, Krazy said:

I am a fussy sleeper and get too hot at night, so its boxer shorts only. I have worn over night on a few occasions thought and wet during my sleep.

 

You don’t wear diapers every night what if you wet your bed?