Meeting People While Wearing Diapers

[babyleanna75]

I recently was on a dating chat site were you talk to the opposite sex one on one. Well I found a woman that I had a lot in comon with she chatted with me up untill I told her I wear diapers for incontinence I think I scared her. I wonder what she thinks. And I wonder what if I tolder her about my dl side and on top of that my intrest in the ab side. I am only going to tell people who want to meet me about the incontinence. And if they can handle that see if they will later experiment in the dlab side. I hope I can find someone who can look past the diapers.

[Repaid1]

So are you saying she broke off the chat when you told her that, or are you still in touch with her?

[babyleanna75]

She broke off the chat so no we aren't communicating. It ain't so bad she was not very pretty. We just had things in common . I know there is someone out there that will love me.

[babyleanna75]

I just thought this would be a topic all us who are incontinent and single would be able to benifit from.

[square_duck]

Physical appearances don't really mean much. It's just the cover of the book, you want what is written inside.

I think that you dropped the incontinence thing way to early and scared her away. Incontinence is something personal and should be treated as such, and the topic can be broached at a later time when you are more familiar with each other and dealing with deeper more personal things, which is what relationships are built on.

Maybe think of it this way, treat your incontinence condition as if it was your savings or investment account. You don't go around showing and discussing how much you have with just anyone, just people who 'need to know' such as bankers or investment brokers or when applying for a home loan etc. She didn't 'need to know' atthat time, so it's something you hold back until later.

relationships are kind of like an onion, there are multiple layers as you get deeper and deeper until you get to the 'heart'. More then likely se was looking for friendship first, and you jumped 4 steps ahead, and she didn't need that.

So kick back, make friends "FIRST" then move on with that person who expresses more interest etc.

Being an AB/DL isn't all that you are, it's just one part of the whole which is *YOU* so stick with things you both have in common and if she wants to know more about other parts, then she will ask when she is comfortable.

So kick back, chat and have fun, stop being desperate, there isn't a hurry...Rome wasn't built in a day nor was the Great China wall...it takes time to build a quality relationship too. Show them that you are worth it and a quality investment (in time) and you both will be rewarded.

Or you can keep tripping over your shoe laces and wondering why no one will talk to you. Your choice

[babyleanna75]

Squar duck you can't hide incontinents from somone and she wanted to meet and talk in person. I would rather tell someone online than face to face less embarassing for me. I have had two long distant chats of people who wanted me and told them around the same amount of time and they wanted me to move to where they were. But I am set on staying put in montana.

[Repaid1]

I hide and have hid my being incontinent from almost everyone I meet on a daily basis. That is to include those with a romantic interest. I don't care what underwear they have on. (well as long as they are wearing some) when I meet them or date them. I don't and nor should you think that a intimate encounter is going to happen while in the first few days or weeks of contact. I have been groped, by a few drunk women in my day, and none of them thought I was packing a diaper under my pants...although a few probably thought I was packing more than I have

I concur that while you shouldn't hide this from someone if things progress, but you say you have had two chats with people over the same amount of time and they wanted you to move to them? How long was this chat with the lady you mentioned originally? I mean seriously a hour? Who the heck would even fathom a thought of moving or asking someone to move in that short of time. I would think "FLAG" something is wrong instantly!!

I had a long distance relationship over the phone (Pre-Internet) with a young lady and we talked and exchanged letters for over 3 months, before I asked her to visit? Let alone a year, before we moved in together. Your 37? are things that bad that you gotta take the first thing that pops along? Slow the heck down before you get hurt emotionally or physically by some nut job!! Seriously!

Being incontinent isn't the end of the world, just about everyone I have ever had a serious relationship with totally accepted me as me, long before intimacy was a issue. Funny thing was when it got to that point they were not interested in what I was wearing but getting them off me...oh the joy of a horny girl ripping off the tapes!, better yet was her taping them back on when we were finished!

[bigbrian]

I am curious about what to say or not to say if meeting someone who does need to wear diapers. Honestly, I would be willing to give a diaper change if permitted, but I don't want to come across as too strong or willing. And this is not sexual for me in any way.

[whisko]

i'm sure that i've met a few people that needed to wear diapers, but the topic of underwear didn't come up in conversation. why would it?

[rusty pins]

I've stood talking to friends I happened to run into when out wearing a diaper under my jeans. They had no idea I had a diaper on. No one could tell unless they were really looking for any tell-tail bulk, and I'm sure that anyone I run into, either store clerks or people I know wouldn't expect me to be wearing a diaper! A couple years ago I was very thickly diapered with heavy cloth diapers, huge plastic pants and black shorts on and taking my boat out of a small inland lake. I figured it was an out of the way lake with not much traffic and there was only one other person at the boat launch when I was getting ready to leave. If that person noticed I had a diaper on, so be it since I had shorts on over it and that person would most likely be a stranger I'd never see again anyway. The fellow getting ready to put his boat in recognized me from high school, which was over 30 years ago! He was a year below me but recognized me! We chatted for a few minutes, me in very thick and bulky cloth diapers under my shorts, but nothing was said about my diapers even though I don't know how he could have missed the bulk! Had the conversation come up, I was ready with a story of prostate surgery gone bad. I don't even know his name and most likely will never see him again anyway. Another time about 5 years ago I was in the bait store early in the morning wearing a diaper and my shirt became untucked. I know a few inches of my diaper was visible showing out the back of my jeans. Another fellow followed me out of the store and struck up a short conversation on what part of Lake Michigan I was going to fish. That had never happened to me before, and the first thing that came to my mind was he noticed I was wearing a diaper, saw it showing out the back of my jeans and was interested that I had a diaper on! At least he probably had an interest in seeing if he could catch another glimps of it! He never said a word to me about my diaper, though, or gave an indication that he knew I was wearing one.

As far as meeting another person into this lifestyle, it took me two years at least of corrosponding with a local DL before I felt comfortable in meeting him in person, and then it was not for any diaper play at all (We are both straight, he's married with grown kids). We both like to fish, I own 2 fishing boats, so we got together to go fishing one day. Sure, we both had diapers on but the conversation didn't even mention diapers for the first 3 hours! Thats what I call taking it easy and getting to know someone well before getting together. Moving in with someone after only 2 conversations? As someone said, that raises a big red flag in my book!

If you think about it, as has been said many many times over, people just don't notice you have a diaper on under your clothes unless you flaunt it. The last thing on anyone's mind is that the person they are talking to would be wearing diapers, including people you know. They would have to know from you or your family that you became incontinent and wear diapers now, and even if they knew, they most likely would not bring that subject up unless they were really close friends that you see on a weekly basis. If a stranger or casual aquaintence happened to notice you have diapers on, they also would be way to polite to bring that subject up to you! Yes, I'm very careful around town when wearing diapers so I don't run into people I know, or if I do, they won't be able to notice I have a diaper on, but when out of town, I'm never bothered if a stranger happens to notice extra bulk from my diaper or sees a little of it showing out the back of my jeans if I happen to bend down in a store. I don't flaunt my diapers, but I don't worry if a stranger happens to notice in the course of going about my normal business. People just won't say anything to you.

[kevinc]

I have discoered over the years that waiting till you have been with the person for awhile and have had a chance to judge their personality and what it is they cant or cant handle, then telling them if you feel it will work out is the way to go. I agree that you need to be patient and dont rush to tell the person almost like you are excited to mention it. that will throw a person off. showing you are confident about your limitations will help down the road though. For me I have had 2 relationships break off after bringing it up and 4 that have continued. Of course those also eventually ended but that was more due to compaitibility issues and I ended them. Im 30 years old and Im a single dad, I also am a pretty confident person and model as part of my living. Additionally my childhood is full of sobs stories starting with growing up in foster care, being abused left and right and dealing with the incontinence mostly on my own besides my foster parents getting the diapers. I have some points going in my favor but there is some one out there for any one no matter what your personality is and how you look. I have had many relationships over the years even though Im both urinary and bowel incontinent.

[Nat]

I am not incontinent but I treat it as if it's a disability. While people don't go around telling people their disabilities or medical problems, they do when it comes to dating and relationships so incontinence should be brought up too. I can understand why the OP would tell the lady. Better to get it out of the way now than finding out you wasted your time with the wrong person. Unless you are not intending to date, don't tell them. But I would have waited longer to tell the person if I were the OP.

[Billiardnut]

I recently was on a dating chat site were you talk to the opposite sex one on one. Well I found a woman that I had a lot in comon with she chatted with me up untill I told her I wear diapers for incontinence I think I scared her. I wonder what she thinks. And I wonder what if I tolder her about my dl side and on top of that my intrest in the ab side. I am only going to tell people who want to meet me about the incontinence. And if they can handle that see if they will later experiment in the dlab side. I hope I can find someone who can look past the diapers.

[babykeiff]

In my experience, the time to tell your significant other is when you know that s/he will be ok with it. This may be within the first week / month or even after a year.

[bobbiesueram]

This subject is a good one. I have always been right up front about my diapers and with the lady I have picked never turned me down for sex or for friendship. My own wife knew about my diapers when we were in junior high. The diapers never turned her off at anytime. In fact most all of them took extra great care of me. Have I been lucky yes I guess so. But I love sex and I love women as my friends. Even my sister-in-laws have been very great about my diapers. They all buy me a baby item for Christmas every year, it's cute and I just love to see what they will come up with every year.

[Bettypooh]

The concept is called "balance" Diapers are only a part of who someone is, and when you get right down to it, they are a small part of life Plus while they can be a deal-breaker in a potential relationship, they are not what an intimate relationship which is going to last is built on So incon or not, keep diapers in their proper perspective and work on the things that make relationships work first Save the mention of diapers for later when there is something more happening between you than just casual introductory conversation.

[Guest stephdiapered]

I've met strangers and people I know wearing girl's goodnites or proper tape on nappies/diapers

[nappylover78]

I've met strangers and people I know wearing girl's goodnites or proper tape on nappies/diapers

[Guest stephdiapered]

And they're never likely to guess... I've been with people I know are wearing a nappy under their jeans and I wouldn't have had any idea otherwise.

[littleJaina]

We are all FAR more likely to notice someone else's diapers than the average person because we see bulk and think "maybe a diaper"? Most people won't. Even if they notice bulk, an adult in a diaper isn't the way their mind will interpret it.

As for finding someone... A general rule is to tell them after you know you'd like to be close enough to them that they'd be likely to notice, but before you actually put them in a position to stumble upon it.

[Pampered_Cowboy]

i wear all the time but its goodnites so its no noticeable

[babykeiff]

Simply,

[rusty pins]

As far as the original post goes, perhaps it might be best, weather on line chatting with someone you are getting to know or meeting someone in person for the first couple times, to just get to know each other first.