ozziebee

Heya Becca, Great updates, and do please keep us posted. I think I’ve had a bit of an epiphany today, when thinking about my own bowel IC desires. We’ve conversed privately about the process of doing the deed - how one should react when feeling a bowel urge. I’ve had a few hangups on my desire to progress with bowel IC, namely I had it as a child and all that entailed (the cleanups, smells, teasing, punishment, etc), and more recently working towards bladder untraining whilst keeping said bowel continence, then a realisation that I really needed bowel IC too but how to do that (when an urge hits do I actively push, or just let it passively work? What if its an inconvenient time and I fight it?). I’m also on ADISC, and one poster on there has been TPI since birth, and suffers from nocturnal bowel movements. His response was whats done is done, get on with the morning and then go clean up. Foe the past few nights I’ve been having some tummy rumblings, with my bowels working away down there. When I felt a bit of pressure I’d bear down a bit, and fidn that fluffy’s been let off the chain! But no BM. My epiphany today was that I should react to an urge like a toddler would - stop and grunt and carry on, then continue on as if nothing has happened. If I’m due to change at 12, and have a BM at 10 (whilst I’m still working away (at home), I still work, and change at 12. I can’t take 30mins off work at 10am to change, so live with it - whats done is done. Just need to accept it and move on I’m also very irregular down there, as I can go 3 to 4 days between BMs sometimes, which frustrates me I had an interesting experience the other day - I had an unexpected and uncontrollable BM which came completely out of the blue, and was quite soft. Before I knew it, I was pooping. So Im at the stage now where soft BMs I will likely not be able to control. Fine with me. So, how to get some regularity into these BMs?

Buying genuine 2" nappy safety pins is far superior to the ones we get from an ABDL supplier, at cheaper cost, and more of them in a pack. I've bought Pidgeon brand (so not chiniese made, but Germany) nappy pins from a baby supply store, and they've taken a beating without destroying themselves, with no discolouration or corrosion. These have a hard plastic safety cover. Only issue is they are _sharp_, which means the sharp tip can bend causing a microscopic hook over time. I also use a newspaper fold for my prefolds, not a kite fold. This means less overlap (its basically one fold over onto itself), and then I don't pin through the fold, just the outer layers of fabric. I keep harping on about snappies, and these work. I use 8 of them at each nappy change. They're stretched, but not extremely to the point of breaking. 8 of them working together means they all take the strain, so less chance to break. I found the snappies from BigW or a baby supply store work equally well. I'd love to find the Toddler sized ones, but these are rare in AUS.

Snappi’s need to be under tension, for the claws to dig into the material. You can use a snappi like a boingo by having the two long arms together, leaving the short (middle) arm on the other end. The snappi does work if you can have one of the long arms attach to one wing of the nappy, the other long arm attached to the other wing of the nappy, and then pull down the middle arm down the centreline towards the crotch. This will pull the wings together and down at the same time. Add a second snappi in the same layout but about two cm lower, and things will be nice and tight/snug. I use the net fixing pants right over the top, which stops the snappies undoing and moving around. Ill also use pins to backup the snappies.

I concur with the above advice re using cloth nappies at night. I had my first sleep wetting episode the other day, and I've been 24/7 on and off for about 5 years or so, maybe a bit longer. I woke up after a good late afternoon sleep to feel the sensations of wee drops wicking their way up the small of my back, only then to get sucked into the cloth padding. I'm a side sleeper. All of my experiences to date with cloth has been this wicking occurring after a wetting episode. It happens irrespective of whether I'm in cloth or disposables, and lying on my side. I have always woken up before to the pee urges, and still lying on my side had a release happen, with some pee drops wicking away along my butt crack to the small of my back. The sensation is like having ants crawl across my back. Even if i'm lucid, I'll wake up fully, as I'm expecting to leak at that point, as I always have had leaks from the small of my back when lying in bed on my side with disposables. As a result, it's the signal to lie on my back and hope that gravity takes over faster, and have the drops touch and be sucked up by the disposable padding, or cloth padding. So this episode last week was surreal in that I woke up only when the drops were marching across my back. Which meant I'd already wet in my sleep. I realised it wasn't press-out (which cloth is prone to do when saturated), as I'd only just changed a couple of hours before my sleep, and these cloth prefolds can take up over 12-18hours of use before being in danger of pressout leaks. What's the difference here? I think my body and mind both understand that I'm not going to leak when asleep, unlike with disposables. If there's __any__ risk of leaks, I'll wake up to the urges. If one absolutely trusts the cloth nappy to keep one safe from a wet bed, guess what'll happen?

So true! One thing that has helped me enormously, is to switch to cloth nappies. As I'm a side-sleeper, I get very conscious about pee creeping through my butt crack, and up onto the small of my back, where gravity will take over and cause leaks. Wearing plastic pants at night helps, but there's still that sensation of a potential leak. With my cloth nappies, I'm able to wrap the sides around to my belly far more than I could with disposables. So the side protection is so much more. My cloth nappies also are very high rise, extending up past my belly button. I really do feel quite wrapped and secure in them. So much so that I'm not worried about any leaks when sleeping on my side. Which meant that I detected my first sleep wetting the other day. It's such a mind-altering thing..

I think I have my first piece of evidence that I had a bedwetting event. It didnt happen overnight, but this afternoon when I had a sleep after logging off from work. I work from home, and treat myself to a sleep for a few hours after work. I’ve been wearing cloth nappies for about 4 weeks now, and so was wearing one, relatively fresh too after changing about 2pm. My sleep this arvo was full of dreams, and at one point towards the end of my sleep I woke up feeling pee trickling along the small of my back. It felt strange, but similar to other times I’d been lying on my side and had a wetting happen. It didn’t feel like it was from press out, and I’d not experienced such before when on my side. The only explanation is that I’d wet in my sleep, with the event over or right on finishing as I woke up. A couple of minutes later, the alarm I’d set to wake me up went off. Interesting! I don’t remember any urges beforehand - I was sound asleep. I am experiencing immediate releases on waking up from overnight, and after my afternoon siestas. I wonder now whether this new event will become more frequent too.

Hehe, so unconscious brain needed to work through the ethical issues of pants wetting, and chose that night to do it. Interesting. I'm still stubbornly not autonomously night-wetting (well, not that I can detect), and am waking with an uncomfortable feeling as an indicator that I needed to pee. However, I am experiencing more frequent episodes of waking up into what I am thinking is a lucid state and recognising that I'm already in the process of wetting. The wetting continues unabated until "something happens". Which may be that I wonder whether my nappy will leak, or a drop of pee moves across my skin into an area where pee would not normally go (like up my butt crack and onto my lower back, which instantly brings up thoughts of leaking nappy, wet bed etc), and I wake up completely at that point, which stops the flow. Is this the pre-cursor to a life of bedwetting? I rarely have pee dreams, and almost never have dreams where I am in nappies. When I was going through my periods during COVID lockdowns where I wasn't wearing nappies, I'd have such dreams. My brain seems to be unconsciously quite satisfied that I am ensconced in a nappy. I do go to bed wet. I've not woken up dry in a very long time when wearing nappies. When my alarm wakes me in the morning, and after I wake up from my late afternoon nap, I immediately wet. Sometimes a lot, sometimes not.

Any updates, JonBear? In regard to bedwetting (nocturnal eneuresis), my body has generally stubbornly refused to get with the program, like you, JonBear. I am able to release in any position, whilst lying in bed (on my back, on my side, on my stomach etc), and pretty much every morning, when I wake up I immediately wet (with it typically being a bit of a flood). There are also times during some nights where I will wake up to wet, and then go back to sleep. However, lately, I've been subject to waking up at night out of a deep slumber to immediately notice a wetting already in progress. I suspect that it's not the act of wetting, or the urge to wet, that's waking me up, but the sensations of ants moving around down there across my skin, as the pee drops move around (especially if I'm lying on my side and pee drops go across and up my butt crack). I'm often waking into a twilight state, recognising that it's in mid-stream and going "oh wow, this is crazy", but otherwise feeling I'm still asleep. But then something unexpected happens (like a droplet moves across my lower back, or I "fear" I'm about to leak (but never have...)) and I wake up fully. Is this the pre-cursor to more unconscious sleep wetting? I do note that I've not had a childhood history of sleep wetting, so my body has no prior experience with this.

The Rearz prefolds are constructed in a way that there's a third of the width that quite thick (about 8 or 12 layers of cloth?), and the other two thirds are a bit thinner (maybe 4 or so layers?). There's stitching around the edges, and along these thirds, down the length of the nappy. XL should do you fine. For these, you want the width. The rise could be a bit problematic (the XL's are 1.1m long after all), and as a result go a bit higher up the belly than usual, compared to disposables. It's totally possible though to fix a rise issue by folding the front under itself. I use what they call a newspaper fold, to fold these, and some snappies. Get the snappies from BigW or a baby supply store, as the ones that LDU sell have all failed in the same way for me. For the netting pants, I've been using the iD Care Net Pants 2XL Orange or 3XL Grey. These stretch right over the cloth nappy, covering it completely. As I said, I use these to stop the snappies from moving around and exposing claws which can scratch or put holes in the PP's. The side coverage is awesome, if you can tolerate a higher rise than dips give you. With a higher rise, there's much more scope for the top front sides to overlap under the back top sides. If you can wrap the width of the nappy around to the point they're almost touching at the front, you'll get good side coverage. The Rearz prefolds are pretty thick once washed a few times, and this includes the sides. So you get lots of side layers once they overlap when pinned/snappied on. I don't like nappies that end up looking like I'm wearing a bikini. I love those nappies that give me a very high rise granny-style-panty effect. But, then I need high-rise plastic pants to cover it all up, which is totally ok (I love the look n feel of good PP's). Add a onesie to support the whole thing, and you're good to go for quite a while!

Don't ever be discouraged because progress has been slow, or there's been lack of progress, or it's seemingly reversed. I have had a theory that one's continence level tracks along a graph like a sinus wave. There's the peaks, and troughs to the wave, the periodicity, and the amplitude. At first, you'll find very slow progress, then something happens and the graph trends downward. After a period of time, it'll trend back upwards. As you remain in a 24/7 state for longer, the overall picture will gradually show a decline, but there will be periods where you reach almost back to 100% continence, and slide back down again. This explains period of bedwetting, then going back to being dry for long periods. At some point, the sine wave wont reach back up to 100% anymore, and you've lost some of that continence. it may even dip down below the level one would equate with "totally incontinent", but then it'll stubbornly go back up - you find you're dry, and pretty much back at square 1. But alas, the period of the sine wave gets faster and faster, so you won't stay dry for long. Even if you stopped 24/7, and put undies back on, you'll find almost immediate full continence, but you will find that sinus wave has steep sides, and if you go 24/7 again, the curve spirals down again much quicker. Everyone reacts and experiences things differently, some people tend to trend downwards faster than others. Who knows why - economic circumstances, the will to do it, the time to do it, the place to do it? I've not been known to bedwet as a child (only one time I do remember). However, I did have bowel issues until well into uni. I'd been 24/7 for 3 years straight up into the start of COVID, then vascillating between knickers and 24/7 nappies, then onto pullups and 24/7 nappies, and now 24/7 nappies (cloth pretty much totally now). One hangup for me back at the start of COVID was I was 100% wetting, and trying hard not to do #2 - it got too painful holding in a #2 till nappy change time, so I got lazy with nappy changes and started wearing knickers. Then I got sick of that, and substituted my knickers for pullups. But I kept the desire for incontinence, and wore nappies for longer and longer periods again. Then I had an epiphany. I accepted the fact I needed to be bowel IC as well. The difference now is that I am totally fine losing bowel control, and am working towards that. This has helped massively with my mood, and also my urinary continence too. I have very little warning that I'm about to void whilst in a nappy (but curiously if I am wearing a pullup, I can go HOURS without a void, probably because I'm afraid of leaks from floods into pullups). It absolutely helps mentally knowing that I'm wearing cloth nappies that are large enough for me, and are oh so very comfortable, and 99.99% chance of no leaks. I'm currently totally ok with very thick cloth nappies, over which I'm wearing fixation netting pants, and over that is plastic pants, and finally onesies.

I know the feeling of nappies swaying underneath, needing changed. Betterdry love doing this, with the clumping of the wet padding accentuating the sway and feels down there, and the tapes stretched and moved across the front wings to the point they're almost about to disconnect. What I have discovered these past few months is cloth nappies, and how gloriously comfortable they are. I'm using the Rearz prefolds with terry towel square nappies as inserts, snappies, netting pant over the top (to protect the plastic pants from errant sharp snappi claws), and plastic pants over the top. I'm in love with this combo. It's a bulky and puffy combo though. Washing is an issue with these big prefolds, so I wash every few days, but pre-rinse the used cloth nappies in the interim. What I'd like to know is what products you're using to wash your cloth nappies, PP's and such. I'm so used to these cloth nappies now, that I'm not liking the feel and coverage of disposables. Oh, and I drove up your way on the weekend, Oz. I put on a Barry before I left, and by the time I arrived on the GC, I was soaked... So strange! Disposables all weekend, and looked forward to home and a change back into cloth.

Totally me! I'm there for the beer and pretzels, and a few M&M throws from the peanut gallery, followed by copius amounts of browsing the Internet on mobile phone. Fun times!

I either get an urge with pressure buildup to the point it releases, and I have to squirm to release the pressure, or I'm unconfortable for the rest of the trip until I stop and get out of the car - then it instantly releases.

I would not ever consider wrapping something like tape around a member or digit for any period of time. All one would need is a bit of swelling to occur, and you're now in the situation where you have blood flow restriction, potentially in an emergency situation (i.e. need to release the constriction _immediately_), lest skin and appendages start to suffer irreparable damage. DO NOT DO THIS! YOU ARE BLOODY STUPID IF YOU DO! The method that is described in the thread linked to a few posts above is one done by para/quadriplegics to stimulate contractions of the bladder. It works most every time to get the bladder to start contractions, but you need to find the spot some point below the belly button where to press, and you press down rhythmically with a couple of fingers gently a few cm at most. The idea is to just "tickle" the bladder into beginning contractions, and once it starts up, it won't stop until voiding is complete. I do not know whether this action all the time leads to urgency, or a lazy bladder, as I've only used it a few times myself.

Absolutely fantastic writing and story telling. The story is evolving slowly, but each chapter is crazily intricate in their own storytelling ways. Just beautiful stuff. One criticism I have, which has frustrated me since knowing of it. And I totally understand that Patreon is an income stream for you. It's been said this story on Patreon is over 30 to 40 chapters ahead of the chapters here. At one chapter per week, that is a year of updates, to get to where Patreon is today. I'd just love to see chapters here released a tad more frequently. I'm not expecting here to catch up, but maybe in 6 to 9 months be somewhat close?

Squad 51, Engine 51!

Not specifically the above, but I've noticed that if my bowel is moving stuff along down there, and my bladder anywhere near full, the movement will cause an urge and bladder contractions with urine release. So, similar thing. Very weird to feel this in the evening when lying in bed, especially.

Heya Ivanna, welcome to DD from another Aussie trans (post-op) 24/7-in-nappies girl! There's not many of use Aussies here, so it's great to see another!

Fascinating last paragraph there, which made me think about what the end-state could be like. Given that we are not SCI, and we receive all messages and sensations from down there, and that the act of pooping sometimes elicits pain or pleasure or discomfort, I’d expect we’ll continue to know that our body will be about to poop, and is going through the motions to poop, including pushing. But we will in all likelihood not be ablw to stop it. Like I clench and freeze up down there to try and stop it, and I still get some leakage. I imagine, for me, it will be my bowels telling me it’s time, and no matter what I’m doing, my body will reflexively push. I will lose the ability to clench and stop the urge until it is too late, or my brain will register that oh golly not now moment a moment too late to stop it, and I will have no choice but to let it happen. At this point in time I make an effort to try and fight through the urges to delay pooping until my nappy change. I have noticed lately that my efforts to stop the urges are failing (so i end up with soiled nappies), and it’s easy to just go with it if it’s convenient to change soon after. What is interesting to me is that I’m starting to see 2am urges, and I’ve not had those since childhood. These have not been hard to fight off, but still, these may be foreboding indicators of nocturnal encopresis returning.

I guess this is a Happy Anniversary! Perhaps? In any event, what you wrote was a rather eloquently put summation of the issues around being 24x7, and limitations that imposes. I look forward to the next 4 years of experiences and documentation of same. This tome will one day be used for research by someone!

Hiyas, I have a unique opportunity to travel overseas to the EU mid next year, but am in a bit of a panic about whether to accept or not. I'm at the stage in my incontinence journey where I need to consider how to have a supply of nappies available (I'm 24/7 in nappies these days). I can take a bag or so overseas with me, but I will need to purchase a supply over there (I'll be gone for upwards of 3 weeks or so). I'll be in Germany and CZ. I've never flown overseas before being incontinent. The last time I went over, I began to realise I was having issues, and went to the urologist after I came back. Now, I have the added complication that I'd be wearing nappies. So where would I order nappies like BetterDry or Rearz from in Germany and CZ?

Not quite right @oznl . The client browser will make a connection to the proxy in order to “proxy” the connection to the destination URL. The proxy will make the connection, and fake itself as the client. From the client’s perspective it is talking to the URL directly, but it’s actually talking to the proxy. This works, as the proxy will have its HTTPS certificate in the client’s cert chain, so the proxy's cert will be trusted by the client browser. Thus the proxy can read the client comms and perform URL and such content filtering, and content injection Where this falls over is URLs requiring a client-side certificate, or a client app requiring a server-side certificate for authentication of each other. If a proxy sits in the middle, the authentication/ authorisation process fails. Which is why we see lots of proxy bypass / whitelisting requests at work.

Incognito mode only stops others from looking at the local machine's browsing history. The mode does not provide any security of the browsing session outside of the browser, so URL's and such can still be captured and reviewed if the browser is configured to use a proxy (and they normally are in commercial contexts). It's more likely that the hotel manager was looking at such URL logs from their proxy server, and doing their own research upon seeing such dubious URL's as browsing to DD and such.

Drug testing in sport, one was allowed to drink as much water as required, in order to provide a urine sample for testing. Yes, they would watch as the subject went to the toilet and physically pee into the bottle. Dunno how this would work in a work-setting. You could ask for water to drink, and see how the tester reacts. They've probably seen it all before - people unable to pee for whatever reason.

Hehehe. I have one female acquaintance who has suspected for a long time that I'm in nappies. She's a hoot to be around, and whenever she see's me, she gives me a warm hug, and a squeeze of my butt. I'm sure she knows, and is just checking me, with a cheeky grin afterwards. Thing is, she's an Aged Care Nurse by profession. When I've not been wearing a nappy and she's hugged me, she'd back away with a weird expression, like "why aren't you wearing a nappy?" She's the only one who does that.