Im back and the desire is overwhelming

[Ginger]

Hey friends. I've been gone for a few months. Training fell to the way side. Mainly due to alot of home stress. I've landed a good job and will be relocating for it. I am feel the urge to restart my training. I don't know why these purge cycles won't leave me alone. I just want to be 247 so bad. The need for acceptance from my bf is pretty huge. I'm still uncomfortable to let him know that this is a psychological need... I know I've asked for advice before. I could use some again...

[fillemup]

Welcome back. You should always support your desires to wear a diaper. Your stress levels will always be lower while wearing a diaper.

[incondl]

Welcome back Ginger

[~Brian~]

On 3/4/2021 at 1:43 PM, Ginger said:

Hey friends. I've been gone for a few months. Training fell to the way side. Mainly due to alot of home stress. I've landed a good job and will be relocating for it. I am feel the urge to restart my training. I don't know why these purge cycles won't leave me alone. I just want to be 247 so bad. The need for acceptance from my bf is pretty huge. I'm still uncomfortable to let him know that this is a psychological need... I know I've asked for advice before. I could use some again...

@Ginger

Welcome back - Nice to see you again

I have a feeling that you will probably go through the same feelings that you went through when you started your "journey" months ago.  You will feel the "want" and the "need" to wear diapers again, and you will NOT be able to "get rid of" or "purge" yourself of those feelings.  I dare say, that if you have had those feelings, they are NOT gonna go away, and they WILL be with you forever, because of the way we are wired.  If you like diapers, or aspects of the lifestyle, the feelings have been there:  In my case, since age 8.

You WILL go through the "binge and purge cycles" you refer to.  You may also go through times when you feel the need to repress or "tone down" the feelings, but they will still be there, and if you like diapers, or any part of the lifestyle, it happens. You are well on your way, but I think that YOU may accept the need for diapers, but your bf may NOT, or you may have difficulty in letting him know what you are dealing with, or why you want/need to wear.  I believe that the MOST important thing is to take care of yourself, and make sure you are taken care of. 

You do not say whether you are still wearing diapers, even though you may not be able to wear or use 24/7.  I take it that because of stresses at home, or change in location, you are NOT wearing like you were months ago, and this is understandable.  You will have to decide whether you disclose your need, and you will have to decide how far and what to tell him.  Do you think that this disclosure is something that he will be able to understand/deal with, or do you think that it will be a dealbreaker?  I would hope for the best, but make sure that you are ready for a non-favorable response.  It is my belief that if your bf loves you, he will love you for being YOU, Ginger, and I mean ALL of you, diapers and all -  If he truly loves you, he will come around, or accept that you need to use/wear.  -  @Evelyn Dellcerro says it best, when she says that far too many relationships are in trouble because of silly things, like a piece of cotton and plastic with tapes:  I am sure that she could give you additional advice, and I would encourage you to speak to her, and others, as her and her wife love each other VERY much, and they do NOT let something like this come between them. Eve and @Transfusionelle can also be valuable assets as well, as they helped ME accept what I have accepted:  I am incontinent, and a Diaper Lover:  I don't disclose to EVERYONE, but those who know are here, or on a "need to know basis" because they help me, or I TRUST them

The Idea here is that you will have to decide WHO you tell, WHAT you tell them, and make a determination of WHY you may do that.  Whatever you do, be TRUTHFUL, Open, HONEST, Direct, and let him KNOW how you feel.  Allow him to ask you questions, and be prepared to be answer him honestly.  HE MAY NOT understand, or have questions regarding this, and he may want to get more information - He also may not want to participate, but may allow you to indulge, or he may want to be involved.  Or he may NOT accept it at all, and that would be the worst case scenerio.  What do you think he may tell you?  is is open minded and accepting?  

In my case, I am disabled, and most people would understand and accept my rationale, and my reasoning for wanting to wear/use diapers.  You may also have psychological need..., and that is a need that must be satisfied in some way. 

There are ways to deal with this:  In 2020, I finally decided that I was going 24/7:  That means Diapers, Diapers, Diapers:  It was for my safety,  Physical health, sanity, mental and  psychological health and convenience.  Lets think of it this way:  Ladies that are menstruating wear pads to deal with their period's "discharge."   If you are already doing that, you are wearing "protection" for that reason. so diapers are just more padded and comfy - Remember, a diaper is just a "special set of undies that you can pee and poop in". - THAT'S IT - If it is comfortable, and you can deal with it, and your bf is open minded, you have a shot - but DON'T Lie to him, or mislead him. 

I believe you have a "need" to wear, and that you should:  But make sure to have a discussion with him:  Especially if you plan on restarting your "untraining" and you will be going 24/7, BOTH ways, like me:  psychological need is a "need" so don't overlook it:  if you accept that you need diapers, and you are committed all the way, [which means you will eventually have ZERO control either way, because you will recondition yourself to use your diapers for everything, and you will replace your undies with diapers, and that you will be totally incontinent] THAN I believe that you will feel better, and the  reason I say that is because if you don't have to HIDE the need, and you can satisfy the need, because you can wear and use openly you WIN:  because YOU and ONLY YOU and those whom you disclose the need to, will be the ONLY ones who know, and what you do behind your doors is your business: You don't have to feel "guilty" or like it's "taboo". LIVE it Girl ***HUGS**

Let me put this into a mathematical equation for you:

@Ginger + DRY Diaper + Food + Liquid  EQUALS WET Diaper + Messy Diaper - STRESS and WORRY EQUALS @Ginger Happy and Contented

Meaning, If you are wearing a WET and MESSY Diaper, well, then YOU are in HEAVEN, Right??

There ya go Hon - Simple as Pi

Good Luck

Brian

Edited March 5, 2021 by ~Brian~
Added Additional Information

[Ginger]

1 hour ago, ~Brian~ said:

@Ginger

Welcome back - Nice to see you again

I have a feeling that you will probably go through the same feelings that you went through when you started your "journey" months ago.  You will feel the "want" and the "need" to wear diapers again, and you will NOT be able to "get rid of" or "purge" yourself of those feelings.  I dare say, that if you have had those feelings, they are NOT gonna go away, and they WILL be with you forever, because of the way we are wired.  If you like diapers, or aspects of the lifestyle, the feelings have been there:  In my case, since age 8.

You WILL go through the "binge and purge cycles" you refer to.  You may also go through times when you feel the need to repress or "tone down" the feelings, but they will still be there, and if you like diapers, or any part of the lifestyle, it happens. You are well on your way, but I think that YOU may accept the need for diapers, but your bf may NOT, or you may have difficulty in letting him know what you are dealing with, or why you want/need to wear.  I believe that the MOST important thing is to take care of yourself, and make sure you are taken care of. 

You do not say whether you are still wearing diapers, even though you may not be able to wear or use 24/7.  I take it that because of stresses at home, or change in location, you are NOT wearing like you were months ago, and this is understandable.  You will have to decide whether you disclose your need, and you will have to decide how far and what to tell him.  Do you think that this disclosure is something that he will be able to understand/deal with, or do you think that it will be a dealbreaker?  I would hope for the best, but make sure that you are ready for a non-favorable response.  It is my belief that if your bf loves you, he will love you for being YOU, Ginger, and I mean ALL of you, diapers and all -  If he truly loves you, he will come around, or accept that you need to use/wear.  -  @Evelyn Dellcerro says it best, when she says that far too many relationships are in trouble because of silly things, like a piece of cotton and plastic with tapes:  I am sure that she could give you additional advice, and I would encourage you to speak to her, and others, as her and her wife love each other VERY much, and they do NOT let something like this come between them. Eve and @Transfusionelle can also be valuable assets as well, as they helped ME accept what I have accepted:  I am incontinent, and a Diaper Lover:  I don't disclose to EVERYONE, but those who know are here, or on a "need to know basis" because they help me, or I TRUST them

The Idea here is that you will have to decide WHO you tell, WHAT you tell them, and make a determination of WHY you may do that.  Whatever you do, be TRUTHFUL, Open, HONEST, Direct, and let him KNOW how you feel.  Allow him to ask you questions, and be prepared to be answer him honestly.  HE MAY NOT understand, or have questions regarding this, and he may want to get more information - He also may not want to participate, but may allow you to indulge, or he may want to be involved.  Or he may NOT accept it at all, and that would be the worst case scenerio.  What do you think he may tell you?  is is open minded and accepting?  

In my case, I am disabled, and most people would understand and accept my rationale, and my reasoning for wanting to wear/use diapers.  You may also have psychological need..., and that is a need that must be satisfied in some way. 

There are ways to deal with this:  In 2020, I finally decided that I was going 24/7:  That means Diapers, Diapers, Diapers:  It was for my safety,  Physical health, sanity, mental and  psychological health and convenience.  Lets think of it this way:  Ladies that are menstruating wear pads to deal with their period's "discharge."   If you are already doing that, you are wearing "protection" for that reason. so diapers are just more padded and comfy - Remember, a diaper is just a "special set of undies that you can pee and poop in". - THAT'S IT - If it is comfortable, and you can deal with it, and your bf is open minded, you have a shot - but DON'T Lie to him, or mislead him. 

I believe you have a "need" to wear, and that you should:  But make sure to have a discussion with him:  Especially if you plan on restarting your "untraining" and you will be going 24/7, BOTH ways, like me:  psychological need is a "need" so don't overlook it:  if you accept that you need diapers, and you are committed all the way, [which means you will eventually have ZERO control either way, because you will recondition yourself to use your diapers for everything, and you will replace your undies with diapers, and that you will be totally incontinent] THAN I believe that you will feel better, and the  reason I say that is because if you don't have to HIDE the need, and you can satisfy the need, because you can wear and use openly you WIN:  because YOU and ONLY YOU and those whom you disclose the need to, will be the ONLY ones who know, and what you do behind your doors is your business: You don't have to feel "guilty" or like it's "taboo". LIVE it Girl ***HUGS**

Let me put this into a mathematical equation for you:

@Ginger + DRY Diaper + Food + Liquid  EQUALS WET Diaper + Messy Diaper - STRESS and WORRY EQUALS @Ginger Happy and Contented

Meaning, If you are wearing a WET and MESSY Diaper, well, then YOU are in HEAVEN, Right??

There ya go Hon - Simple as Pi

Good Luck

Brian

I truly believe you are right. And I know its the right thing to do. We HAVE gotten closer as a couple, and honestly I don't see him leaving me over my need for diapers. I hope to get further along in my UN training and hope to stay away from purging. I AM wearing again. He gave me a hug earlier and felt it on me. Kissed me and said he loved me so. I think that or HOPE that is a good sign. I just feel so complete while I am in a diaper and even more so when I use it BOTH ways. It's just what I need to do. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! It's so great to have a good supportive person to talk to. Thank you

 

[~Brian~]

1 hour ago, Ginger said:

I truly believe you are right. And I know its the right thing to do. We HAVE gotten closer as a couple, and honestly I don't see him leaving me over my need for diapers. I hope to get further along in my UN training and hope to stay away from purging. I AM wearing again. He gave me a hug earlier and felt it on me. Kissed me and said he loved me so. I think that or HOPE that is a good sign. I just feel so complete while I am in a diaper and even more so when I use it BOTH ways. It's just what I need to do. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! It's so great to have a good supportive person to talk to. Thank you

@Ginger

I think that You GOT it, hon - I KNOW that what is RIGHT for ME is based on what I believe.  I know that you are on a journey, and I also know where you want to end up - Eventually, you WANT to BE 24/7, both ways.  I KNOW i am right here, as you stated that yourself.

If you are intent on proceeding and restarting your "Un-Training", and you are wearing again, you are back on track - If he KISSES you, and says "he loves you" you have a special young man here - Make sure that you let him know what is going on - You have a psychological need to wear, DON'T let that get you down - DO IT - and it sounds like you have a good sign here   I doubt that you will see him leave over your need for diapers.  If he does, that only means that he is not the right match, but let's NOT worry about that one yet *HUG*

1 hour ago, Ginger said:

I just feel so complete while I am in a diaper and even more so when I use it BOTH ways. It's just what I need to do. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! It's so great to have a good supportive person to talk to. Thank you

I know you do - I feel the same way -  Feels Good doesn't it? Now, all you have to do is talk to him, and help him understand what is going on, then, once you and him have an understanding, THEN the FUN starts again, because then you will NOT be under as much stress!  If there is anything else I can help you with, you can always reply here or shoot me a PM

You are WELCOME @Ginger, the pleasure is Mine, as always

Good Luck!

Brian

Edited March 5, 2021 by ~Brian~
Added Additional Information

[Ginger]

I woke up wet! I'm excited! Maybe all of the training I have done intermittently over the years will help to make this attempt more fruitful. I'm hoping so.

[BaronBrook]

You can lower the impact of these binge & purge cycles.

Try to write out the various steps you mentally go through. What drives the binge, what drives the purge, etc.

At every step along that cycle you can do things to lower the impact. The goal being to find a comfortable and sustainable middle ground.

Try to find something that you can do all the time to take the edge off.

[sparklezBear]

On 3/5/2021 at 5:43 AM, Ginger said:

I don't know why these purge cycles won't leave me alone. I just want to be 247 so bad.

I won't add much as It's hard to shine a light to @~Brian~'s reply. 

For me, the purge cycles were driven by shame. Many years ago when I did purge, it was always because I felt guilty and shameful, that I might be rejected by others. 

The only cure for this is acceptance. In my case, I accepted that the need to wear nappies (and consequently be in nappies 24/7) was part of me, just as much as the colour of my hair. Sure, I could dye it for a little while (purge), but it always comes back. It's entirely innate. Or at least it is for me.

I wish you many more wet mornings .

[Ginger]

Well, it's been 13 days and I'm still full time! I'm  really hopeful I won't back track. I have had two genuine accidents (happy ones) which re affirms my need!!

[~Brian~]

@Ginger

Congrats, and I hope that you will be able to continue. and won't backtrack - Sounds like you are on your way, and you have already had some accidents, so that's GREAT - and YES, remember, you DO have a Need, and that WON'T Change   *HUGS*

Have a Great day, and keep us posted

Brian

[carsfan]

@Ginger I’m really happy for you if diaper dependency is what you really want( it sounds like it is) 13 days is remarkably quick to be having genuine accidents. Keep up the good work 

[Ginger]

This isn't my first attempt. I have been off and on 24/7 for the past 4 years. Each time I manage to lose a little more control then when I purge, SOME control is regained. Each attempt at becoming dependent shows progress a little sooner than the prior attempt. Which is great, I hope that means full and complete loss is inevitable ?

[Ginger]

Still 24/7! Waking up wetter than I was at bedtime, and everything has gone into my diaper!!! 

[~Brian~]

7 hours ago, Ginger said:

Still 24/7! Waking up wetter than I was at bedtime, and everything has gone into my diaper!!! 

@Ginger

It seems that I am also doing the same:  24/7, and  I am really WET, but that is awesome, because the diaper is holding, and i just got UP, and it is NICE and squishy - I have gone at LEAST 4 times, and each time it has gone into my diaper.

Brian

[diaperuser]

Welcome back. Glad you are back to wearing 24/7. Wish you the best in becoming diaper dependent.

[Ginger]

Just wanted to check in with you guys and give you an update! I am still wearing and using 24/7! My level of happiness I dramatically improved. Thank you for your support!

[~Brian~]

5 hours ago, Ginger said:

Just wanted to check in with you guys and give you an update! I am still wearing and using 24/7! My level of happiness I dramatically improved. Thank you for your support!

@Ginger

That is always nice to hear - I am also glad that you are happier - I know I was, when I finally made the decision I made back in 2019 and 2020 - I simply wasn't willing to let incontinence and accidents win, when I can control them the way I choose

Brian

[Ginger]

Hi friends! Just an update. I am still 247 and with no regret! I have lost some control in both bowel and bladder. Tho it seems bowel control is being lost quicker than my bladder control. That part seems to have plateaued a bit. I assume that is to be expected. I still have that last minute urgency feeling before wetting. But it's harder to stop the flow and it is alot more often than before I started un training. As for my bowel control, I usually just feel the pressure for a moment right before I release and I know longer push even in the slightest bit. Just pressure, then release automatically. I'm very happy about that part. ☺ I also am staying quite regular. I didnt expect that part. I assumed I would go more often but I am thankful for the regularity as it fits nicely with my schedule. Anyway, that's an update for now!!! ?