Bad Jokes

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Maybe; if you weren't trying to sneaker round (How many times do you have to be told; it's "BAD jokes"?! Cheeziz Kryse!!)

The local jeans maker wanted to find a person who would specialize in sewing in fly fronts. He used Zip Recruiter

[square_duck]

Ya hear about the flight training school that was trying to increase business by offering crash courses to aspiring pilots.....?

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Yes, they had to ditch the idea before it got off the ground. It just would not fly

[square_duck]

Bah dah ZING!!

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

When someon told me about the "wind farms" that are supposed to supply electricit and I looked into what the actual price per Kilowatt and found it was 2 to 3 times what conventional powerplants cost and that it would be prohibiative. I commented "That is one expensive blow job"

[BabyJune]

How do you plant a wind farm, with electri-SEED-y?

[Babygeebee]

What do wind turbines talk about? 

Not much. They just shoot the breeze. ?

[ValentinesStuff]

You don't want to get into an argument with a wind turbine, they always argue in circles.

[square_duck]

Wind turbines are really just blow hards... ??

[square_duck]

Ya hear about the cheese factory wanting to hire ???

They are looking for a few 'grate' people.....??

 

 

[Crinklz Kat]

14 hours ago, square_duck said:

Ya hear about the cheese factory wanting to hire ???

They are looking for a few 'grate' people.....??

 

 

 

[Apache Raccoon]

On 7/23/2022 at 7:48 AM, square_duck said:

Wind turbines are really just blow hards... ??

Did you hear about those two wind turbines discussing music?

One turbine asked "What kind of music do you like?"

To which the other wind turbine replied "I'm a big metal fan"

[ValentinesStuff]

On 8/5/2022 at 1:15 AM, square_duck said:

Ya hear about the cheese factory wanting to hire ???

They are looking for a few 'grate' people.....??

 

 

They had an employment test.

 

I shredded it.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

I considered applying until I found it was a family operation owned by the Muensters

[ValentinesStuff]

17 minutes ago, Little BabyDoll Christine said:

I considered applying until I found it was a family operation owned by the Muensters

To bad, you would have been a Gouda employee.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

What if I did not want to brie

[Firefly 35]

I blame the world's problems on Minecraft.  Whenever you exit the game it says "saving world", so that must mean it's corrupting the real one, right?

[Babygeebee]

1 hour ago, Firefly 35 said:

I blame the world's problems on Minecraft.  Whenever you exit the game it says "saving world", so that must mean it's corrupting the real one, right?

I prefer Douglas Adams's take on world:

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened."

[ValentinesStuff]

1 hour ago, Babygeebee said:

I prefer Douglas Adams's take on world:

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened."

Twice.

[Firefly 35]

How many professional engineers does it take to vacuum the floor?  Three. 

One to forget to plug it in.

One to forget to turn it on.

And of course one to run the vacuum over some loose twine and get the brushes jammed up. 

The janitor would then have to explain that that is not the correct procedure for cleaning the floor; surely a professional would know that?

[Babygeebee]

There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don't. 

[BabyJune]

On 8/13/2022 at 7:46 AM, Babygeebee said:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don't. 

Roses are red, and violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

[vvp39]

Where's the groan button?

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

You're  never alone with a split personality

On 8/13/2022 at 8:46 AM, Babygeebee said:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don't. 

Oh; byte me

[Firefly 35]

A few things you should know when buying a new computer:

* RAM is a measure of the computer's durability, usually measured in GB (gigantic bonks).  At least in theory; 1 GB is usually sufficient to break most devices.

* Don't fall for a subcription to EMAIL (Electronic Massacure of Arbitrary Information on your Leisure time).  Otherwise, you'll have no leisure time left!

* For optimal security, use a detonator virus on any hacker who tries to compromise your device.  Typically, these work by igniting the offending device's battery or making it backfeed current into the outlet, causing short circuits.  Very effective.

* Finally, optical drives are typically best for data back-ups as the computer can actually see what it's doing.