Things You Shouldn'T Say

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Okey dokey. An error of judgement on my part.

I guess I thought there were more people like me out there, but oh well.

Do I need to change my sig?? Since...ya know.

[Dr_J]

You just need to tone it down as a million people have either told you or have been wanting to tell you.

Allow me to further expand. I'm sure there are more people like you. But the thing is, some of us have been members for quite some time.

Lots....and lots...and lots of people have posted similar things in the past, and we've called them out on it just about every time. It's gotten old, to say the least.

The fact that you believed it was a phenomena means you're either still new to the lifestyle or perhaps you truly find similar stories 100 percent believable.

Darkfinn said it best when he said there were people similar to how you've been acting who make us look bad. The folks who are trying to make a difference can't make a difference when we've got horny, fantasy-infused people coming in and telling us these seemingly outrageous stories. Even worse, you defended it and did not accept the blame when you clearly upset quite a few of us.

Allow me to teach you a thing or two about image restoration theory (thank you Grad School). This is a theory that states when the public finds an individual at fault, even if said individual is not at fault, that individual's reputation is damaged. It takes work to rebuild your reputation and regain the trust and acceptance of the rest of the people.

I won't go into detail on the strategies involved since this would be a four page description, but I will say that you need to take corrective action. That is, tell us what you're going to do to make sure this doesn't happen anymore, apologize (a plain, "I'm sorry for upsetting everyone and will try not to do it again in the future."), and rebuild your image. This can take anywhere from days to years, depending on the severity of the act.

Call me a dork, but Organizational Communication has allowed me to analyze your situation, and I'm merely making recommendations for you for future reference.

Your first step in realizing people are/were upset with you should've been a simple apology. The next step should've been editing your post and deleting it. Finally, if you're not sure HOW to write on these forums (etiquette, etc.), look at the rules, observe other posts, and see how most threads are written. Get to know the "culture" of our community so you can apply it and contribute to our community in a good way.

This concludes my lecture/rant/analysis.

[aleyxsis]

We don't hate you and there is probally alot of people out there like you .But unfortunatlly im beginging to think they look like the comic book guy on the simpsons .WORST EPISODE EVER !! wish i could post a pic of him

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Oh well the difference with me is I don't find any of this sexual.

Like, I may like some things more than others, but I don't get aroused when I see anything diaper related.

I find my stories believable because they are true. Such asthe one in this thread, it happened because I am VERY bad at paying attention to my surroundings.

Absentmindedness isn't a representtive cross section of the community. I am an outlier. Someone who is in the community, but on the edge.

I do understand why its difficult to weed out liars from genuine because I have read through the threads.

I see a lot of hatin' threads (a few members even banned) and a lot of OMG a hot girl changed my diaper threads.

however, what I say is true cuz, ya know, if you live wet/messy like I do, then you have a higher probablitiy of things happening in your life. Which they do. Trust me. I've got real tales to tell. But I won't report them here because I know the flaming will start up again.

I'm not a troll. Trust me. On the Lost board, trolls intentionally ruin things and it PISSES ME OFF. Problem with some trolls is they have access to a large network of computers and when they get banned, just move over one seat and start over. Happens in the Lost board often.

And one dude nicnamed LostFan108 ruined the biggest twist in the show so far, because he was a dick.

[sarah_ab]

i think everyone should go to http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=21529 this thread and then consider making a donation... it will make everyone feel better about themselves.

[diapermanftw]

i think everyone should go to http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=21529 this thread and then consider making a donation... it will make everyone feel better about themselves.

It's one thing to post asking for donations in one place. Spamming it in other threads is another story...

[sarah_ab]

It's one thing to post asking for donations in one place. Spamming it in other threads is another story...

i apologize to the three year old member with no profile and 15 threads under his belt.

i have contributed to this thread in many other posts.. and just felt a little levity in a thread that was being dragged on and on for no reason was required.

I apologize if i offended anyone or they felt i was spamming a thread.

I apologize if my trying to alert as many people as possible about this great opportunity was wrong.

The walk is tomorrow and I will not post again.

If the community feels that my asking for people to simply read another thread is spamming then please forgive me and I will never again make this sort of post.

but if people dont feel that way.. the link again was http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=21529

[dl_ashlee]

Personally I haven't read a lot of what he has posted, but most of what I have read hasn't been all that bad.

I do have a problem with him walking around messy all the time, no one wants to smell it. Anyone who has bowel problems is going to get changed ASAP. I certainly have a problem when you say something like I am going to ride a bus today and go #2 while on it because I haven't done that before, it is one thing to say I was on a bus today and the urge came and so I went, but to seek out this situation of you going out of your way to do something like this seems wrong to me.

[Horndog]

Okay, here's a thought: let's not spend so much time railing on this guy.

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Oh snap there's been massive trolling on my other fav board sine the finale of lost is like a month and a half away.

And to DLASHLEE: I did the bus thing but I did not "actively seek it" like you said. I was already messy BEFORE I entered the bus. It was just one thing I haven't done messy.

And I don't "seek out" anything since I trained myself incon. So its not sexual or erotic to me. Its just a lifestyle.

Well, enough about being messy.

I'll keep messy in the SSP forum and keep the wetting here. I just wish more people considered mess and wet as one and the same. I DO think it unfair to dog on me when everyone else can wet in public no problem. I would like to know why wetting in public is Okey-Dokey but messing is a huge NOO. I mean, in both you are releasing body fluids AROUND PEOPLE. IN PUBLIC. SO it is slightly unfair to say it's okay to be wet in public but not messy. That just seems like a double standard.

[Nat]

Messing smells and wetting doesn't really smell. That's the difference.

You can wet in public. No is telling you you can't but allowing them to leak and staying in a wet diaper and it's smelling is not okay. Lot of us find it offensive when you go out in public like that. I've had leaks in public before and I didn't like it. But I didn't go online posting about it. I have a private life and people don't need to know what incidents I had at work or in public. I am sure lot of us here have had leaks at work or in public but we didn't do it the way you did it. We didn't stay in wet diapers and not change knowing it's going to leak and then choosing to wet it again just so it leak. I am also sure lot of us don't go online posting about our public leaks making threads about it the way you do.

Like some people have said, they are sure there are people out there like you but they do not go online posting about it. They also wouldn't go into detail if they were to talk about close calls or talk about public embarrassments. They be too embarrassed thinking they might be judged.

[Bettypooh]

....I would like to know why wetting in public is Okey-Dokey but messing is a huge NOO. I mean, in both you are releasing body fluids AROUND PEOPLE. IN PUBLIC. SO it is slightly unfair to say it's okay to be wet in public but not messy. That just seems like a double standard.

A wet diaper that is not leaking is invisible, and usually emits no odors- therefore it doesn't affect anyone other than the wearer A messy diaper emits odors which others in your presence are forced to endure whether they like it or not- and the vast majority of people do not like that smell !!!

You are part of society whether you like it or not, and living in the human society requires that everyone have at least a minimum amount of consideration for others for it to function properly

A red traffic light doesn't physically stop a car, but it is expected of every driver to stop at a red light whether they want to or not because not stopping is an intrusion on the rights of others In this case a law was enacted to make society's rules clear and because running a red light endangers others. In the case of bodily odors there is no imminent danger to all others so no laws are enacted, but you should still understand the principle well enough so that you don't infringe on other people's rights even when you legally can

Being intentionally offensive to other people is going to bring you trouble in life. Life brings more than enough trouble by itself without inviting more What you are experiencing on these boards is essentially what people in RL are thinking about you when you stink publicly. The only difference is that in RL most people are courteous enough to not say anything because they are not anonymous, while here we are somewhat anonymous and won't have to face you personally for what we may say Thus we are more open to criticize people online so most people do that (which by the way still doesn't make that right). What people say and do online is a deeper look into their real persona. It is what people are like at their deepest level and nothing like the face they put on in public. It scares me to know just how awful some people are and that I am actually living amongst them in the real world!

Even in the ABDL community there are expectations of a basic level of decorum if you want to find acceptance. Going out in public intentionally stinking when you don't have to is going too far for even us! We know personally that we're pretty 'far out there' when it comes to social acceptability so if what you do offends us, you're going waaaay too far with the general public who are much less open-minded And one more thing here that hasn't been mentioned: You're use of scents to mask odors which shouldn't be there isn't fooling anyone but you. That much scent is equally offensive to many of us and some people have severe allergic reactions to this kind of thing- many workplaces have banned the excessive use of perfumes for that very reason. Even homeless people can find ways to maintain a reasonable level of hygiene if they want to- and for the rest of us this is what we're expected to do. Society demands this of us and to be a part of society we must comply or accept the consequences that non-compliance brings. If you don't like the reactions you're getting the only way to change that is for you to change- the world isn't going to rapidly change for you just because you want it to.

Your "reality check" is bouncing, but you can fix that if you want to. If you want to have much of a life in our world I'd suggest that you begin pondering what your actions do to everyone else around you. You can make a way to enjoy the things you like and have a decent life in our world, but only when you live your life in a way that doesn't cause others to immediately reject you. What happens next is up to you- if you don't change your ways the reactions you get here and elsewhere will not change for the better either. That's how the world works, like it or not

Bettypooh

[diamondback6881]

It's one thing to post asking for donations in one place. Spamming it in other threads is another story...

You're a douchebag.

[Nat]

A wet diaper that is not leaking is invisible, and usually emits no odors- therefore it doesn't affect anyone other than the wearer A messy diaper emits odors which others in your presence are forced to endure whether they like it or not- and the vast majority of people do not like that smell !!!

You are part of society whether you like it or not, and living in the human society requires that everyone have at least a minimum amount of consideration for others for it to function properly

A red traffic light doesn't physically stop a car, but it is expected of every driver to stop at a red light whether they want to or not because not stopping is an intrusion on the rights of others In this case a law was enacted to make society's rules clear and because running a red light endangers others. In the case of bodily odors there is no imminent danger to all others so no laws are enacted, but you should still understand the principle well enough so that you don't infringe on other people's rights even when you legally can

Being intentionally offensive to other people is going to bring you trouble in life. Life brings more than enough trouble by itself without inviting more What you are experiencing on these boards is essentially what people in RL are thinking about you when you stink publicly. The only difference is that in RL most people are courteous enough to not say anything because they are not anonymous, while here we are somewhat anonymous and won't have to face you personally for what we may say Thus we are more open to criticize people online so most people do that (which by the way still doesn't make that right). What people say and do online is a deeper look into their real persona. It is what people are like at their deepest level and nothing like the face they put on in public. It scares me to know just how awful some people are and that I am actually living amongst them in the real world!

Even in the ABDL community there are expectations of a basic level of decorum if you want to find acceptance. Going out in public intentionally stinking when you don't have to is going too far for even us! We know personally that we're pretty 'far out there' when it comes to social acceptability so if what you do offends us, you're going waaaay too far with the general public who are much less open-minded And one more thing here that hasn't been mentioned: You're use of scents to mask odors which shouldn't be there isn't fooling anyone but you. That much scent is equally offensive to many of us and some people have severe allergic reactions to this kind of thing- many workplaces have banned the excessive use of perfumes for that very reason. Even homeless people can find ways to maintain a reasonable level of hygiene if they want to- and for the rest of us this is what we're expected to do. Society demands this of us and to be a part of society we must comply or accept the consequences that non-compliance brings. If you don't like the reactions you're getting the only way to change that is for you to change- the world isn't going to rapidly change for you just because you want it to.

Your "reality check" is bouncing, but you can fix that if you want to. If you want to have much of a life in our world I'd suggest that you begin pondering what your actions do to everyone else around you. You can make a way to enjoy the things you like and have a decent life in our world, but only when you live your life in a way that doesn't cause others to immediately reject you. What happens next is up to you- if you don't change your ways the reactions you get here and elsewhere will not change for the better either. That's how the world works, like it or not

Bettypooh

Well said. You said it better.

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Well I stay out of public as much as I can to avoid being offensive to others.

A hermit, I guess you could say. Sunlight makes my skin burn like a vampire.

I just feel we as individuals have a right to live how we want. And I like living this way. Sure, it's not the best way to make friends and it sure doesn't make getting a job easy. But that's what life is about. Living it for YOU and no one else.

You only get one life. Live it like you want to.

[Nat]

Well I hope I won't be seeing you complain about not being able to find a job or not being able to find friends and all that.

I am telling you this because I do not like to see people complain about their issues that can be fixed and worked on and they refuse to do a thing about it. If there was an ignore option, I would put them on my list so I wouldn't have to see those posts. I have known at least two people online who would spam a forum about their women issues but they would ignore all advice people would give them. They just whined and whined and never did a thing to fix it or even listen to anyone's advice. These people irritated me and I was friends with one of them. Go figure and I stopped talking to him because of it. But one of them was finally banned and my friend hasn't whined about women since an incident on the forum.

[diamondback6881]

Well I hope I won't be seeing you complain about not being able to find a job or not being able to find friends and all that.

I am telling you this because I do not like to see people complain about their issues that can be fixed and worked on and they refuse to do a thing about it. If there was an ignore option, I would put them on my list so I wouldn't have to see those posts. I have known at least two people online who would spam a forum about their women issues but they would ignore all advice people would give them. They just whined and whined and never did a thing to fix it or even listen to anyone's advice. These people irritated me and I was friends with one of them. Go figure and I stopped talking to him because of it. But one of them was finally banned and my friend hasn't whined about women since an incident on the forum.

QFT

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

OKay this bothers the heck outta me. I know all the internet acronyms but what does QFT stand for?

The closest I can think is "Quit f*cking t...."

It wasn't long ago I found out what FTW meant. I always thought it meant "Follow the W...."

[Genesis]

OKay this bothers the heck outta me. I know all the internet acronyms but what does QFT stand for?

The closest I can think is "Quit f*cking t...."

It wasn't long ago I found out what FTW meant. I always thought it meant "Follow the W...."

It means quoted for truth.

If you have further abbreviation or acronym questions, I recommend looking it up on urban dictionary (.com obviously)

[babykeiff]

i apologize to the three year old member with no profile and 15 threads under his belt.

i have contributed to this thread in many other posts.. and just felt a little levity in a thread that was being dragged on and on for no reason was required.

I apologize if i offended anyone or they felt i was spamming a thread.

I apologize if my trying to alert as many people as possible about this great opportunity was wrong.

The walk is tomorrow and I will not post again.

If the community feels that my asking for people to simply read another thread is spamming then please forgive me and I will never again make this sort of post.

but if people dont feel that way.. the link again was http://www.dailydiap...showtopic=21529

Sarah_AB,

you have a cheeky way about you, but I like it.

[babykeiff]

Spokane Girl,

very well said.

For those people who insist on using acronyms, I suggest that you do a little research into the true history of them, the core reason they were created, and the little use that have today. Also, I suggest you also research the meaning of communication!

[DIAPERPHANTOM]

Bettypooh,

One of the best threads I've ever read on this site.

You could have just ignored this topic and subsequent posts and said nothing, but you didn’t. Despite the risk of sounding mean or being labeled as a member of the “Board Police

[rusty pins]

This is my take on it and sorry for the long response. Some people really like certian things that others do not. Personally, I'll take a dump in my diaper a couple times a year for fun but when I do I change right away and make sure I don't stink up anyone else's space. To each his own. Since wetnmessy likes to talk in details about his adventures and lifestyle that most others find offensive, perhaps some others on this website who are also into the same things can start messaging or e-mailing him so they can become friends and talk among themselves. That might satisfy his need for telling others the details about his experiences.

The thing you have to realize and not get too upset about, wetnmessy, is that everyone is different and you can't please everyone. Even though there are some others out there who like messy diapers, it's not everyone's cup of tea. That is why there is a special forum just for messy diapers. Frankly, the majority of members don't like hearing about someone wearing a wet and messy diaper for 24 hours before changing it. From what you have said in your posts, you wear one diaper a day and only change it once a day. That brings all kinds of images to one's mind that most people would find disgusting, including some of those who post in the "STINKY, SQUISHY AND PROUD" forum. Even people who are actually incontinent due to medical and physical problems will change their diapers regularly throughout the day. If you like sitting and walking around in your mess and urine for 24 hours at a time, that's your interest and compleatly up to you. The thing is, it's obvious that most people in the forum are turned off by it. You can't get mad at them for how they feel about it.

Likewise, we shouldn't get mad at wetnmessy for his liking to wear his wet and messy diapers 24 hours a day. We can, however express our feelings and opinions on how he goes about doing what he does in public. This is a discussion forum.

What I'm going to express now is how I feel about it. Wetnmessy, all I ask is that you consider the feelings of other people when you decide to do what you like to do. That means not purposly exposing your lifestyle to strangers or the public in any offencive way. That means that someone who sees your diaper showing out your pants may or may not be offended by it so you should do your best to keep it tucked into your pants. I know you have said that you don't care who knows you wear diapers and why you wear them. Should someone happen to notice you are wearing a diaper and say something to you, instead of saying something like, "I choose to wear diapers and use them", or "I like wearing diapers and wetting and messing my pants and I don't care who knows", consider a less offensive answer and say, "I'm sorry you noticed. I have a medical need for them" and leave it at that. Also, if you must wear a dirty diaper out in public among other people, please use deoderant pills like nullo to stop the smell. I know you have stated that you don't mind being stinky and actually like it, but others don't like it and shouldn't have to be forced to smell your mess when your near them (including sitting on a bus next to someone). If taking deoderant pills and wearing plastic pants dosn't eliminate the smell every time, then keep away from people when you stink.

I also know you have said things about where and how you mess when out in public. If you have to mess your diapers, don't make it obvious to other people that your pooping your pants. Don't squat down, grunt and push out a load in front of anyone. Find a quiet spot where no one can observe you and do your deed that way if you must. Sitting or getting on a bus and then purpously pooping your pants (diaper) in front of a lot of people is just not a cool thing to do even though you may get some satisfaction or thrill from doing it. Just have consideration for people around you who don't want to see or smell something like that. They shouldn't have to.

Now, the last things I'll comment on are our lifestyle, the public and health. Many people do not know about the AB/DL lifestyle at all. Other people know of it but think that adults who wear diapers by choice are perverted pedofiles. Only a few have an understanding of why we do what we do. There have been many people in this lifestyle over the years who have gone to great lengths to try and bring understanding to others of just who we are and why we do what we do. There have been advancements towards understanding this lifestyle, but the minute someone crosses the line it gives every AB/DL a bad name. When we see on TV or read in the paper about the 40 year old who was caught wearing diapers at the playground, or the adult who kept tossing his dirty adult diapers out of his car window, or the guy who decided to go to the store wearing just diapers and a shirt, it gains such negative publicity and sets any advancement in understanding this lifestyle back to the stoneage. If you really want to be a respected an accepted member in this lifestyle and community, you should demonstrate your good faith by first thinking and showing good judgement about what you do in your diapers when out and among other people. You don't have to stop pooping your pants or wearing diapers, just make sure your diapers don't smell, that you don't flaunt them at other people and that you don't make it obvious that your wearing diapers. Don't poop them around other people who will notice what you are doing. Use a lot of discretion and stop to think what your actions may mean to the whole AB/DL community and all of us.

Lastly, while it may seem fun and feel good to you (and probably save you money), It's just not healthy to wear only one diaper a day when you wet and mess it like you do. For the life of me I can't understand how one diaper can hold up for 24 hours of wetting and messing without leaking or compleatly falling apart! Maybe you wear super thick cloth diapers which makes you obviously bulky! Anyway, even if one diaper does hold up to 24 hours of wetting and messing, it's not healthy to your body to wear your excreations constantly. After all, it's your body's waste products and there is a reason why your body get's rid of them. Aside from obvious diaper rash, there could be other health problems connected to wearing a wet and dirty diaper 24 hours every single day before changing it. Once in a while for fun is one thing, but every single day may not be a good thing for your health.

Once more, these are my thoughts on the matter, looking at the overall picture and trying to see both sides a little. Keep in mind that if there are 100 people and 90 of them have one view on the subject and 10 have an opposite view, which view is most likely the more acceptable point of view?

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Well I forget which thread I said it in, but I said it.

That I will quit talking about my mess in ther forums other than Stinky, Squishy, and Proud.

Only there will I talk about my stinkiness and messiness.

Yes, I DO only change once a day. Sure it may be a turnoff to A LOT of people I run into, but it's my lifestyle.

Anyway, yea. My messiness stays in my diapers and in SS&P.

I will only talk about being wet outside there?

Is that cool?

I mean, I don't nearly enjoy being wet as I do ridiculously messy. But II think I can manage. I still like being wet though.

Even now I'm sitting in a very, VERY soaked Bambino, having had three floods today alone, since I drank a lot of water last night.

[rusty pins]

I know you have been making an effort here in the forums, wetnmessy. Once more, it is your lifestyle and I don't fault you at all for doing what you like. My point (and others) is just having consideration for others around you when you go out in public so that they don't have to smell you or see you possibly flaunting your diaper or things like that. My comments are based on what you have stated in past posts. Take care.