Some Questions, Thanks For Replying.

[Guest]

Hello Everyone,

I never believed I would be writing on these message boards, but after being released from the hospital two nights ago I have some questions hopefully the community could help me answer. I was involved in a car accident that left me with Reflex Incontinence due to a blow to my forehead. My mother has helped my recovery process immensely but I will be remaining in a wheel chair for some time. Even though my life has now become sedentary I still have problems with the noise my diapers create, I just dislike the obvious sound and was wondering what I can do to alleviate this issue. Also, what tips or suggestions would you be willing to share on coping or daily living with my Reflex Incontinence?

Thank you all for helping or commenting,

Midori

[Angela Bauer]

Welcome to DD, Midori!

Although my profound bladder incontinence is not the result of physical injury and I do not need a wheelchair, perhaps I can offer some sympathy and suggestions.

While you are seated in your chair or out of bed, you might prefer dusposables with a cloth-like outer layer. Those are quiet and breathable. Velcro tabs can be repositioned.

Classic poly-plastic outer layer has real advantages when you are in bed. Most caregivers find it easier to change poly disposables when the patient is in bed. To reduce that noise wear snug knit cotton undies over the diaper. That also is a good idea with any diaper, to help keep it in the best place when it gets heavier with urine.

"Reflex Incontinence" describes a set of symptoms, which can have many causes. The ways you cope depend on you and the specifics of your condition. The best way to learn to cope is to talk to your physicians and physical therapists.

Something to remember is that there is less than no point in hating your diapers. Until you regain control you will need diapers. Try to find the pleasures of diapers. This website is full of messages from Diaper Lovers and Adult Babies. Consider those activities as coping strategies.

Hello Everyone,

I never believed I would be writing on these message boards, but after being released from the hospital two nights ago I have some questions hopefully the community could help me answer. I was involved in a car accident that left me with Reflex Incontinence due to a blow to my forehead. My mother has helped my recovery process immensely but I will be remaining in a wheel chair for some time. Even though my life has now become sedentary I still have problems with the noise my diapers create, I just dislike the obvious sound and was wondering what I can do to alleviate this issue. Also, what tips or suggestions would you be willing to share on coping or daily living with my Reflex Incontinence?

Thank you all for helping or commenting,

Midori

[Darkfinn]

Angela does have some good advice there. Cloth-covered disposable diapers are very prevalent in today's market... they are much quieter than the plastic ones that you may be more used to.

Please remember this. There are millions of people world wide who wear diapers every day for any number of reasons... so you are definately not alone. Also... the general public is much too distracted with their own lives and doings to notice you much at all... little lone be attuned enough to hear the tell-tale crinkle of a diaper. The only people I know who have noticed my diapers are people who wear them too.

[diamondback6881]

Please remember this. There are millions of people world wide who wear diapers every day for any number of reasons... so you are definately not alone. Also... the general public is much too distracted with their own lives and doings to notice you much at all... little lone be attuned enough to hear the tell-tale crinkle of a diaper. The only people I know who have noticed my diapers are people who wear them too.

I second that. The general public, by and large, is so wrapped up with their own stuff, they won't notice a diaper crinkling.

[Guest]

I thank everyone for the sweet replies, I will definitely look into everything!

[riflemanjon]

i know what you are talking about with the diaper noise. so during the day at work i wear walgreens and cvs fitted briefs they have the cloth outter cover and nobody knows that i wear. after work i change in to a depends. i go throught about 4-6 diapers a day.

[turtlepins]

It gets better with time. I can't wear disposables so I don't know much about the crinkle noises and such. The suggestions offered seem reasonable. I go through an average of 14 cloth diapers a day, wearing one at work (changing every 2 hours when I can) and two or three at home office and in the house.) Everyone is correct on the general public being too wrapped up in their own lives to notice you. I got hugged by 35 people recently and not one noticed, even with the close contact. I have had people say you smell nice. That means I smell like baby powder or baby lotion, and they like that smell. I do too. I rarely think about my diaper when at work, though I do try to check and change every two hours when possible. You just get used to having one on, and it's like wearing jeans, or socks, or a hat!

[hidden]

i had 4 or 5 people randomly gang up on me at work as a joke since i am typically more serious than them about the job and hug me at the same time. i grabbed a spoon that was laying near by as they were doing it to fake defend myself with.

[bobbyc]

Aside from cloth-like outer layer diapers, I have found that Molicares are very quiet diapers and very comfortable as well as being one of the more absorbent diapers on the market. The new design of the Molicare Super, I believe, is THE most comfortable and quietest diaper available. I love the stretchy tapes!

Good luck, keep your spirits up, and keep us updated on your progress.

[Guest]

Hello everyone!

I feel as if my recovery is going swell, finally accepting my incontinence as part of my new life.

My latest quibble about myself is of the aspect of going back to work. How am I supposed to work in close proximity of others remaining smell free? I just don't feel I could tell anyone else about my incontinence. But how will I remain hidden when I cannot control sounds and smells coming from myself.

This has to be the most depressing subject on my mind.

Thanks for any comments,

- Midori

[Bettypooh]

Hello everyone!

I feel as if my recovery is going swell, finally accepting my incontinence as part of my new life.

My latest quibble about myself is of the aspect of going back to work. How am I supposed to work in close proximity of others remaining smell free? I just don't feel I could tell anyone else about my incontinence. But how will I remain hidden when I cannot control sounds and smells coming from myself.

This has to be the most depressing subject on my mind.

Thanks for any comments,

- Midori

I'm glad things are getting better for you

You've always heard that you are what you eat, and in this case it's more true than ever. I'm sure others will give you more specifics, but in general the urine odor is lower when you're diet is best. Coffee and other caffienated drinks (including sodas) are a bad offender, as is letting yourself become dehydrated. I know it's counterintuitive as you would think the fewer fluids the better, but too little water means the concentrations of waste in the urine are higher percentage-wise and therefore it will have a stronger odor. Dehydration also imbalances the body's general health so it's going to try to add an even higher percentage of waste than normal to the body's output to get rid of it all.

Noise is worse to the wearer than the people around you. You'll find clothing that is better at helping you muffle the noise with a bit of experimenting. Something that helps me is to wear a pair of nylon briefs over the diaper, which slightly compresses the diaper and makes it quieter as well as smoother looking under clothing. Really, nobody will notice the noise and in time you'll see that this is true.

Another help is to change often. If you can't dispose of the used diaper inside the bathroom stealthily you can carry your large purse in with you, put the used one in a ziploc bag, then carry it in your purse to where you can safely dump it. Camoflage is another option, such as a couple plastic grocery bags to hold the ziplocked diaper. And do ziploc it as that seals the odors in. Perhaps you can work out a system with the help of a trusted manager so that you can have a more private place to change made availlable to you. If you keep your mind open you can find alternatives that can help with the problem.

As embarassing as it could be, there's always the truth backing you, along with the fact that this could happen to anyone. Being a medical condition it falls under the ADA in cases of harassment or discrimination, a fact that you can use if necessary. There's quite a bit relating to this subject on the boards here though I can't point you to the threads. With some luck you won't have to deal with this for long and you might not have any issues or problems to deal with till then.

Best of luck to you!

Bettypooh

[rickibrat2]

diapers are no big deal any more to most people it is the last thing on there minds as a rule i have been in diapers sense the age 19 when i was hurt in viet man

it iwll make finding others hard some time,s it seem girls find guys that wil love them even in diapers more them males find girls that can deal with it

but what ever you do for a realtion ship to work later you both have to try to meet each others needs

[bobbyc]

As for worrying about smells from your diaper, most high-quality diapers, like molicares, have something in them that helps to control odor. Otherwise, as someone else said, stay hydrated by drinking plenty of water - this will probably work the best. As for messy diapers, change as soon as you can and plastic pants over your diaper will cut down on the smell a great deal in the meantime.

And, while it is very thoughtful and considerate for you to consider the comfort of others around you, as long as you do the best you can to stay clean and hygenic, you have to still remember that we are all human and no one is perfect - We all get bad breath, body-odor, smelly feet, etc.

Good luck to you and know that you have a good support group here at DD.

[Repaid1]

Also as a side note, if your incontinence does fall into bowel movements, you might want to try taking "Nullo" or something similar it helps mask the odor over time. Hang in there!

[Guest]

Also as a side note, if your incontinence does fall into bowel movements, you might want to try taking "Nullo" or something similar it helps mask the odor over time. Hang in there!

Thanks for all the assurances folks, and thank you for this tip aswell.

[Pollyanna Fleshman]

A good diaper that I like and that is very affordable, as well as very absorbent, is the Reassure Super Brief. It is a private line manufactured by HDIS. You can order them from http://www.hdis.com or call 1800-269-4663. They are cloth on the outside, but they work well. Kendel is also another good diaper.

I hope I've helped.

[babykeiff]

Midori,

as you are aware, the plastic on most disposable diapers make noise that is mostly a distraction to the wearer. Rather than try the more expensive brands on the market - cloth covered etc, why not wear a pair of boxer shorts over the diaper. I wear 24/ due to the fact that I am completely incontinent, and what I do to mask the sound is threefold - 1 Wear a plastic pant over them. That reduces the noise created by your inside thighs rubbing the plastic. 2- Wear a boxer short or a pair of swimming trunks over that - that reduces the friction rash caused by constantly rubbing the plastic. 3- Before I put on a diaper, fold it lengthwise to form a pocket in the center. That allows the diaper to absorb close to its manufactures capacity while eliminating the rest of its movement on the body.

If all that fails to satisfy you, why not start carrying a standard plastic bag in your pocket, and eif anyone questions you on the noise, you can show them the plastic bag. Nobody, to my knowledge, is aware of my diapers, and the average person dose not pay any close attention to the crotch of another - for one, that action is stereotyped as being gay, and another, a stranger is not aware of you actual stomach or butt size, so wearing a diaper, most assume that it is just your natural fat butt. It is only an ab etc that will even think that you wear. Even so, what does it matter that you wear diapers. The people are strangers and their opinion doesn't matter.

FYI, I wear Tena Slip Maxi or Tena Flex Maxi. The choice is made depending on how easy it will be for me to change. As you said that you are bladder incontinent and wheelchair bound, why not use cloth diapers. Most plastic pants are whisper quiet. And if you are worried about the smell, increase your water intake. I also take 500mg of activate charcoal capsules which means that my diapers do not smell at all.

[Darkfinn]

I really wouldn't worry about the smell from just a wet diaper. I've been 24/7 for nearly a year now and noone I know has said a word about any kind of smell. I have told a few close co-workers that I wear... however most of the people in the office don't have a clue, and don't suspect a thing. The ones I did tell were absolutely clueless until I said "I wear diapers."

A lot of worries about incontinence and incontinence products are simply in your head. Things take time to adjust to... but after a bit you'll realise that noone really notices or cares and you can get on with your life.