I’m Confused…Please Help

[Breeze1]

So as of late I’ve tried my first diaper and it was amazing, but I’ve been looking around online and I’m finding myself to be more and more attracted to frilly, pink, cute and soft things. Now by no means am I a sissy(I’m a diaper lover), but when it comes to my diaper play I feel like I want everything to be cute and pink. I’ve looked at diapers, diaper covers, cloth diapers, dresses and everything (not that I would go as far as to wear a dress) and anytime I see it… I want it badly!! Now as you can imagine  this hasn’t been entirely easy for my gf but we haven’t really talked about it. I just don’t know what to tell her to help her understand why I’m feeling the way I do. I’m not gay nor do I want to feel like or be a female or even a sissy for that matter, but pink, girly, cute things… yes please!! But how do I explain it to a gf that’s afraid to see me without my masculinity…please help. 
PS: I don’t mean to shame sissies or gays in any way, power to you all!!

Thanks

[Rachael-Little]

So maybe being a little more girly while in a diaper will help you get into little space,

I know for me I very much prefer being a girl, and well I am gender fluid so that is prob why but without a doubt baby girls are cute in their pink frilly dresses and outfits 

[Snugglebear_69]

There is a very big difference between gender identity, who you are, and gender expression. Being a male and man (I assume based on what you wrote) you can still have a desire for a more feminine gender expression without it having anything to do with your gender identity. Look up the terms and get to know the distinction and thst may help explaining things to your girlfriend.

For example a tomboy is a female, woman with a more masculine gender expression, they don't desire to be a man. Same but in reverse for a femboy. Also concepts you may wish to look up and understand.

[Breeze1]

1 hour ago, Rachael-Little said:

So maybe being a little more girly while in a diaper will help you get into little space,

I know for me I very much prefer being a girl, and well I am gender fluid so that is prob why but without a doubt baby girls are cute in their pink frilly dresses and outfits 

I just find the aesthetic so pleasing…

[Cute_Kitten]

Some social groups say clothes know no gender. Don't feel ashamed for liking something just because it's traditionally "girly" or associated with females. It's not hurting anyone and it's not illegal (though that does vary depending upon your country of residence). Boys can wear pink and have tea parties if they want to. Those are outdated gender/ social norms IMO.  If you like the aesthetic, go for it! Rock it and do you. If you're worried about your gf/ friends etc you can start off in private so you're in a judgement free zone. You can give yourself some time- you don't have to rush to tell anyone else, so take your time until you come to understand and feel comfortable with it. Then when you're ready you can tell others, who may have questions etc you'll be more confident answering when you accept it/ understand it better for yourself. 

[~Brian~]

@Breeze1

8 minutes ago, Cute_Kitten said:

Some social groups say clothes know no gender. Don't feel ashamed for liking something just because it's traditionally "girly" or associated with females. It's not hurting anyone and it's not illegal (though that does vary depending upon your country of residence). Boys can wear pink and have tea parties if they want to. Those are outdated gender/ social norms IMO.  If you like the aesthetic, go for it! Rock it and do you. If you're worried about your gf/ friends etc you can start off in private so you're in a judgement free zone. You can give yourself some time- you don't have to rush to tell anyone else, so take your time until you come to understand and feel comfortable with it. Then when you're ready you can tell others, who may have questions etc you'll be more confident answering when you accept it/ understand it better for yourself. 

@Cute_Kitten is correct! Guys can wear pink very well, purple very well, and other colors. Just because something is pink or purple or looks like something a girl would wear, that doesn't necessarily mean that a guy can't wear it . She says the truth when she says that these are old norms that have gone by the wayside as far as I'm concerned .

for your information: I have several pairs of trifecta diaper covers: about 14 of these our pink ones, 14 of them are blue ones, five of them are white, and several of them are blue. I would follow her advice. I don't think masculinity has anything to do with the colors you wear, because there are a lot of strong men around here that wear differing colors, and it makes them look good. She says that guys can rock pink as well as anybody else, so I wouldn't worry about weather a color is girlier not, because any color can be done correctly and rocked if done right.

I would also probably tell your girlfriend not to worry: there are plenty of guys out there that probably sneak into their significant others underwear drawer, and probably there isn't a guy alive that hasn't tried their girlfriend's panties or maybe they like pantyhose or silk or something else, and they might even like a pretty dress. Just like there probably isn't a person around that hasn't tried a diaper every once in a while in secret, and liked it. There are a lot of things in life that are a little more risque, trying on women's clothing is not considered risque, and some people like it, but that doesn't necessarily make you any less a man than you are.

If guys can wear jeans or T-shirts,girls can wear the same thing . If guys wear girls clothing it is not illegal, so don't worry about that . This would be an opportunity to show your girlfriend that you can wear pink and other girly colors , and show her that you can look handsome in those colors. If I can wear pink trifectas over my pink diapers, you can wear pink or purple , and experiment with the girl's clothing, you just have to make sure that your girlfriend is OK with it. It might take her a little bit of time to warm up to the idea, but it doesn't make you any less a man if you like pink purple or other color dot was formally associated with the ladies .

good luck!

Brian

[Breeze1]

1 hour ago, Cute_Kitten said:

Some social groups say clothes know no gender. Don't feel ashamed for liking something just because it's traditionally "girly" or associated with females. It's not hurting anyone and it's not illegal (though that does vary depending upon your country of residence). Boys can wear pink and have tea parties if they want to. Those are outdated gender/ social norms IMO.  If you like the aesthetic, go for it! Rock it and do you. If you're worried about your gf/ friends etc you can start off in private so you're in a judgement free zone. You can give yourself some time- you don't have to rush to tell anyone else, so take your time until you come to understand and feel comfortable with it. Then when you're ready you can tell others, who may have questions etc you'll be more confident answering when you accept it/ understand it better for yourself. 

I agree but I think it’ll take awhile to kill the shame completely.

2 hours ago, Snugglebear_69 said:

There is a very big difference between gender identity, who you are, and gender expression. Being a male and man (I assume based on what you wrote) you can still have a desire for a more feminine gender expression without it having anything to do with your gender identity. Look up the terms and get to know the distinction and thst may help explaining things to your girlfriend.

For example a tomboy is a female, woman with a more masculine gender expression, they don't desire to be a man. Same but in reverse for a femboy. Also concepts you may wish to look up and understand.

Thanks for the advice we had a nice long talk and I’m not sure if we made any progress or not but I think we both feel better.

51 minutes ago, ~Brian~ said:

@Breeze1

@Cute_Kitten is correct! Guys can wear pink very well, purple very well, and other colors. Just because something is pink or purple or looks like something a girl would wear, that doesn't necessarily mean that a guy can't wear it . She says the truth when she says that these are old norms that have gone by the wayside as far as I'm concerned .

for your information: I have several pairs of trifecta diaper covers: about 14 of these our pink ones, 14 of them are blue ones, five of them are white, and several of them are blue. I would follow her advice. I don't think masculinity has anything to do with the colors you wear, because there are a lot of strong men around here that wear differing colors, and it makes them look good. She says that guys can rock pink as well as anybody else, so I wouldn't worry about weather a color is girlier not, because any color can be done correctly and rocked if done right.

I would also probably tell your girlfriend not to worry: there are plenty of guys out there that probably sneak into their significant others underwear drawer, and probably there isn't a guy alive that hasn't tried their girlfriend's panties or maybe they like pantyhose or silk or something else, and they might even like a pretty dress. Just like there probably isn't a person around that hasn't tried a diaper every once in a while in secret, and liked it. There are a lot of things in life that are a little more risque, trying on women's clothing is not considered risque, and some people like it, but that doesn't necessarily make you any less a man than you are.

If guys can wear jeans or T-shirts,girls can wear the same thing . If guys wear girls clothing it is not illegal, so don't worry about that . This would be an opportunity to show your girlfriend that you can wear pink and other girly colors , and show her that you can look handsome in those colors. If I can wear pink trifectas over my pink diapers, you can wear pink or purple , and experiment with the girl's clothing, you just have to make sure that your girlfriend is OK with it. It might take her a little bit of time to warm up to the idea, but it doesn't make you any less a man if you like pink purple or other color dot was formally associated with the ladies .

good luck!

Brian

I know I’m not hurting anybody but I worry that I’m hurting my gf. I don’t want to make her feel like I’m just gonna do what I want all the time, but on another hand do I just deny my interests and forget them??

[diapered charles]

Took me over a decade to get over the guilt myself. Sometimes we are our own worst critics. 

[Bumptylee]

16 hours ago, diapered charles said:

Took me over a decade to get over the guilt myself. Sometimes we are our own worst critics. 

I’m glad you got over it! Same here. I introduce special people in my life to Bumptylee.  Being gentle with yourself and open with what you like and want is a revelation. 
 

Any GF who doesn’t understand me isn’t one I want in my life. 

[diapered charles]

My advice for OP is to talk about it more often especially to supportive people. I suggest a kink aware therapist. I started with an awesome therapist in grad school. It wasn't easy at first but it became so and she eventually enjoyed talking diapers with me. She researched ABDLs and had a bunch of questions for me one session. I miss her sadly. She moved away. 

[JP403]

I kinda have the same misunderstanding to an extend