Apartment Concerns

[dlsafrica]

Since I moved here in 2002, there have been many demographic changes, as would tend to occur in a metrópole suburb. A clotting store that was open for 60 years, shut because the older female demographic was replaced by a much younger population, despite the fact that this is a university dominated suburb. And here, where I live, it was ah old age home being sold off in titles when I purchased.  I am probably the longest resident here, with the lady a few doors down having moved in 3 months after me.

But now, for the first time, there are also two families with children, one of which lives next door.

It is a challenge keeping (evidence of) diapers from showing up in the trash, as I have shared before.. but now I have to worry about parents of other households finding out, and what they may think.  Now sure, there's many reasons why someone may use diapers, and it should also technically not be anyone's business, but it does make one feel a little more cautious. Hás anyone dealt with this discreetly before and how?

[TinyBunny]

Sometimes my bin liners have split and I've had to leave exposed diapers lying in the public bin.  I'd prefer it if the bag didn't break but if it happens I don't worry about it.  I wear mostly plain diapers though; it's rare that I wear ones with unicorns or trains or whatever printed on them.  You have a solid excuse if anybody challenges you but if they do they would be being obnoxiously nosy; that's my opinion.

[~Brian~]

@dlsafrica

On 12/20/2021 at 5:55 AM, dlsafrica said:

Since I moved here in 2002, there have been many demographic changes, as would tend to occur in a metrópole suburb. A clotting store that was open for 60 years, shut because the older female demographic was replaced by a much younger population, despite the fact that this is a university dominated suburb. And here, where I live, it was ah old age home being sold off in titles when I purchased.  I am probably the longest resident here, with the lady a few doors down having moved in 3 months after me.

But now, for the first time, there are also two families with children, one of which lives next door.

It is a challenge keeping (evidence of) diapers from showing up in the trash, as I have shared before.. but now I have to worry about parents of other households finding out, and what they may think.  Now sure, there's many reasons why someone may use diapers, and it should also technically not be anyone's business, but it does make one feel a little more cautious. Hás anyone dealt with this discreetly before and how?

where I live, I don’t worry about it too much. I live in a building that has elderly and disabled within it. I know that there are several of us that wear and use diapers and incontinence products, so it’s no big deal if they find them in the trash bin. I’ve been using them since 2019 anyway, and this place is been pretty understanding of the whole thing.  This is an elderly disabled housing complex, so yes, we have people that use these products.

I wouldn’t worry too much about having worn diapers, or whether someone sees diapers, because if you have a reasonable reason for wearing them or using them, it should not be that big of a deal.  Whether or not there are children who where are use diapers in your building, that should not be a problem either.  People may wear and use diapers – that is a fact – it could be an adult, it could be a child, or someone who is disabled, so it shouldn’t be a big deal..

On 12/20/2021 at 3:58 PM, TinyBunny said:

Sometimes my bin liners have split and I've had to leave exposed diapers lying in the public bin.  I'd prefer it if the bag didn't break but if it happens I don't worry about it.  I wear mostly plain diapers though; it's rare that I wear ones with unicorns or trains or whatever printed on them.  You have a solid excuse if anybody challenges you but if they do they would be being obnoxiously nosy; that's my opinion.

@TinyBunny

I have the accord liners myself. I have had them get a rip in them, and I’ve had them actually had things fall out of them, but they still work pretty good. The bag has broken or split  on me before, but I don’t worry either, I just put the diapers in the trash bin, and that is that. I figure if someone sees diapers in the trash, they will know that someone wears or uses them, because I live with a bunch of elderly and disabled tenants, it is not uncommon for them to see diapers in the trash.

I wholeheartedly agree with you! If someone “outs you” when they find out but the neighbor is wearing diapers, they would be obnoxious, and they would be calling attention to themselves unnecessarily, and I can guarantee you, the poor person that wears diapers would feel probably about 6 inches tall 3 inches wide. There’s no excuse for this, and someone who has this happened to them would feel pretty crummy.

Brian

 

Edited December 22, 2021 by ~Brian~
Edited usage and spelling

[rusty pins]

How many different people live in that building and use that locked dumpster?  If it was just 2 families, you and another I might have a concern.  Otherwise, who will know just which tenant tossed that bag of adult diapers out?  I can't see anyone dumpster diving to try to check out the bag of diapers they might have seen, but just in case make sure you don't toss out anything that has your name on it in the same bag, or same type of bag.  Junk mail or anything if you are worried and want to be safe.

[~Brian~]

11 minutes ago, rusty pins said:

How many different people live in that building and use that locked dumpster?  If it was just 2 families, you and another I might have a concern.  Otherwise, who will know just which tenant tossed that bag of adult diapers out?  I can't see anyone dumpster diving to try to check out the bag of diapers they might have seen, but just in case make sure you don't toss out anything that has your name on it in the same bag, or same type of bag.  Junk mail or anything if you are worried and want to be safe.

@rusty pins

pays to be careful in whatever situation you are in. You obviously don’t want somebody “dumpster diving “to find out what is in a dumpster, or why someone may put a bag of something in a dumpster. I also don’t see a reason why anybody would want to dumpster dive to find out why somebody put diapers in To a waste bin, or a dumpster. If someone does that, they have way too much time on their hands, and they can get themselves into trouble for doing so.  I make it a habit to get rid of all of my diapers in their disposal bags, and there is no mail or any identifying material within them. Even if there was, I don’t think anyone would care about it anyway, because who would want to go dumpster diving. You never know, but it always it’s good to be cautious.

Brian

[steveg]

Wow I live in a huge complex and I am sure i am the only one who get diapers delivered here LOL.  The management has ever signed for my Abena's that are shipped form the VA pharmacy.  My personal though is is who the cares if I am diapered and throwing diapers, they are more worried about the neighbors picking up after their dogs than what I am throwing in the dumpster. only time neighbors complain with when my music or movies disturb them.  

[AwakenEvil]

I think you are a little paranoid over nothing. I don't think your neighbors would give 2 shits if they found adult diapers in the trashcan, and honestly if they did why would they bother talking to you about it. I remember living in the city with several people sharing a large dumpster and tossing diapers as a younger adult, and no one ever said anything, and I am positive we had, dumpster divers looking for anything.

[square_duck]

There is always just switching to cloth diapers and covers. Just wash everything, and don't worry about the trash....??

[TinyBunny]

2 hours ago, square_duck said:

There is always just switching to cloth diapers and covers. Just wash everything, and don't worry about the trash....??

Oh yes I forgot to say that there are probably members here who just shamelessly hang their cloth diapers out on the washing line for all of the neighbours to see.  I wouldn't do it but I bet some members here are doing that, and if you're reading this and you're one of them I have this to say to you: "You must save a lot of pennies from not running the electric dryer, so just carry on."

[steveg]

LOL on cloth diapers, there is nothing like pulling a warm diaper out of the gas dryer, the smell the warmth  almost orgasmic. 

[FretaBWet]

Lol, I do shamelessly put my cloth diapers out on the clothesline. We do save many pennies on electricity but there are other advantages like sunlight (UV radiation) sterilizes the diapers too. Our home sits 4 miles from the nearest paved road, it sits probably 75 yards from the road and our clothesline sits out behind the house. Only family or visitors will see my diapers so it's not very public.

I think worrying about neighbors seeing adult diapers in the dumpster is a waste of energy. Even if someone noticed them they wouldn't bring it up in conversation with neighbors or friends. What would you think if a neighbor came over and started talking about seeing adult diapers in the dumpster. Wouldn't you wonder why they were fixated on it. Any average person wouldn't be thinking about who it was that threw them away. You're not likely to ever hear one word about them.

[~Brian~]

@FretaBWet

1 hour ago, FretaBWet said:

Lol, I do shamelessly put my cloth diapers out on the clothesline. We do save many pennies on electricity but there are other advantages like sunlight (UV radiation) sterilizes the diapers too. Our home sits 4 miles from the nearest paved road, it sits probably 75 yards from the road and our clothesline sits out behind the house. Only family or visitors will see my diapers so it's not very public.

I think worrying about neighbors seeing adult diapers in the dumpster is a waste of energy. Even if someone noticed them they wouldn't bring it up in conversation with neighbors or friends. What would you think if a neighbor came over and started talking about seeing adult diapers in the dumpster. Wouldn't you wonder why they were fixated on it. Any average person wouldn't be thinking about who it was that threw them away. You're not likely to ever hear one word about them.

I would agree with you. If someone is going to go out of their way, and I mean so far out of their way but they are going to either “dumpster dive“ or they’re going to “investigate whether somebody has diapers on their clothes line“ then I believe they have gone way too far, and they have way too much time on their hands. The simple fact is, people wear diapers every day. Whether they be infants, toddlers, young children, disabled,  or adults. There are too many people in the world wear diapers anyway, so anyone who goes out of their way to find out some thing like this Will learn something, and some things that you learn are better left kept to yourself.

As far as I am concerned: I ended up adopting the following “rule” back in 1995. The rule is: as long as somebody is doing something that is not harmful to me, harmful to my neighbors, harmful to the building integrity, or the safety of the people within the building, and this means health as well, I am not going to worry about it. This rule changes when somebody goes out of their way to cause me trouble, make a lot of noise, or end up bringing up things that they have no business worrying about.  Part of the problem in my building is, the There are people who like to “gossip” in our lobby, and everybody has an opinion, and they don’t mind sharing it with others in the room. I’ve even had situations where somebody talks about somebody else, and they make stupid gestures, or they go right after someone because they think someone is getting into someone else’s business. I even tried to help a 95-year-old woman find a Red Sox game one night, and one of my neighbors that was in the lobby thought I was taking over the entire television: I am not a guy that would do something to someone like this, nor What I stop at 95+ year old woman from enjoying her favorite past time: baseball: I am a Red Sox fan, and she was two. My mother and my father taught me manners, respect, integrity, and other things. I am not the type of guy to “Take over“ someone’s TV time when that is one of her favorite things to watch. I would not do that to her, and I would not do that to somebody else that’s in the lobby watching TV. I pay for my own cable, so if I want to watch TV up here I have every channel that I want, and ample time to do any TV watching here in my apartment.

there are people around here in my building that we call “snitches“ if somebody stays longer than they’re supposed to, and I mean I have had someone do that to me, more than one hour after the “time that they’re supposed to“ then somebody will report that to housing. I have had that happen to me on a few occasions, and I’ve gone directly to the Housing Authority, stating that my brothers are here to help me, and that I would appreciate them not getting involved in everything somebody goes and tells them things so I don’t what housing to stop me from seeing my family. Housing has allowed me that latitude, so I don’t have this problem.

I don’t mind my neighbors having issues or questioning me, but I wish that certain people would just keep their nose out of everyone else’s business, it makes a heck of a lot of difference.

Brian

[Dubious]

I threw away diapers in clear plastic bags, not cause I wanted to, but cause they demand that you use clear plastic bags..
Next year this gonna happen more often, as they gonna empty the bins outside once a month, whereas now they empty 2 times a month, and I usually manages to throw out all diapers, but with a monthly schedule I have to take them to the dump more often, in clear plastic bags.
Its free, and I have never had them inspected, but they visible in the container..

In the bin outside I use black bags.

[~Brian~]

55 minutes ago, Dubious said:

I threw away diapers in clear plastic bags, not cause I wanted to, but cause they demand that you use clear plastic bags..
Next year this gonna happen more often, as they gonna empty the bins outside once a month, whereas now they empty 2 times a month, and I usually manages to throw out all diapers, but with a monthly schedule I have to take them to the dump more often, in clear plastic bags.
Its free, and I have never had them inspected, but they visible in the container..

In the bin outside I use black bags.

As I keep saying, it should be no one’s business what the heck we are disposing in the waste bins. My stepdad for example, came in here a couple times, and I have several nice looking shelves in my living room. I have a feeling, that he scans the shelves to see what I may have on them, only because he can see them because they’re open to everyone seeing him. I have asked my landlord for permission to have someone come in here, and measure and install accordion doors or solid doors that can be attached to the wall the wall near the shelves, so that this can be closed off, so no one sees all the stuff out in the open. When I first moved back in in 2007, I love the shelves, but I didn’t like the fact that they were just open to the world and look like a warehouse. That is one of the things that I hate about my living room, and when I say hate I mean hate. It doesn’t seem like anyone decided that it might not be a good idea to have everything open to the world. If these were shelves like a bookcase, or maybe half of a bookcase, I wouldn’t have as much problem with it, but the reason why asked for doors on these shelves is because I don’t think everyone needs to “see everything” on the shelves. I am fortunate however, that my diapers are on the far right side, and even if they do see them what the hell. I just don’t want to hear all the time when somebody comes in “you have too much junk” because everything on that shelf is there for a purpose, I can see almost all of it, about 90%, and it is not junk. If it was, I would put it in the Trash cans. I don’t think everyone needs to “see everything on my shelves” every time they walk through. It makes him think that I am just a junk hoarder, and that is far from the truth, try to keep my apartment clean, and I have several people come in every couple weeks to take care of this.

as I said above, if people are “looking for“ diapers in bags that they are getting rid of, they really have too much time on their hands. People need to use them, or want to use them, and they will use them regardless of what someone thinks believes or says. My parents used to say to me that something may be “none of my business“, and I still remember those words. I don’t care if someone knows that I wear or use, but for everybody else, it is none of their concern, because They don’t have the feelings I do, they don’t have the problems I do, and they don’t have to deal with purchasing them, changing them, disposing of them, or anything else. When I talk to my case manager on the phone, she is very supportive and reiterate that “it’s not a really big deal”, and she’s right it is not: The only way it becomes a “big deal“ is if somebody makes it one. I mean, if you went to a nursing home, I’m sure that they are going to have incontinence products in the trash, or any other types of things that would be used in procedures that are disposable. If they have a “sharps“ that they dispose of, then they have a special container that they put that into, and in each persons room they have a locked sharps cabinet, and each time that it’s fall, it is removed.  

As I said, use the accord System, and their bags. These things are green, and they smell like vanilla. I’m glad I have these, because having a black bag in your shower, it’s not ideal. If you have a diaper that is really bad, and you leave it in your shower bay, and you don’t deal with it, it will smell up your entire bathroom, and then whoever comes in will be dealing with that smell. I try to keep that to a minimum, because what if somebody decides they need to use my bathroom? I’m not going to tell them that they can’t, but I am not going to leave it so that they can smell it, if I can help it, because it would be my responsibility to remove anything that was that bad. It’s just common sense, and it’s common courtesy. I know my parents for example would not leave some thing that smelled real bad in their bathroom if somebody was in the house, and they would get rid of it. So if they do that for their guests, I would do the same. My brothers already know that I use diapers, so it’s not a big deal. My brother MIKE says the only thing that he wants to make sure happens is that it doesn’t smell in the bathroom. If he can smell it, I remove it. Simple as that. I really don’t care what type of bag that I use,  because I have a medical condition, and no one is going to question it.

Because of my accord bags, I don’t have to use black bags for a diaper disposal. I just pull it out, tire off, and throw it away. If I had to use a black bag, I wouldn’t put my diapers within it, unless there was a really bad break in a bag.  When @TinyBunny has had a break, she asked to pick up diapers off the floor and throw them in the trash. I’ve had to have them do that myself, because apparently I missed calculated, but I don’t mind doing it it’s part of the cycle, and it’s part of life, and it’s no big deal.

Brian