Realistic public babying (pacifiers, strollers, and diapers) and suspension of belief in stories.

[spark]

One of my favorite tropes is a case where the little is infantilized in a way that is somewhat realistic way in the scope of the story.  A girl/boy getting put in diapers and being treated as baby/toddler in the privacy of the home is typically not realistic, but in the context of a diaper story it is completely realistic.

But I've wondered how to incorporate that when the CG and little are in public.      In my mind there is something to be said for the subtle incorporating of babying in a discrete way in public.   Changing the diaper in a family restroom, or private seclude area is realistic in the scope in most diaper stories, but in my opinion it's not always realistic to change the little's diaper in a park in front of friends.

One of the tropes I've seen is to make the little extremely small, such that she easily passes for a toddler, but IMO- that requires a HUGE suspension of belief.   It's realistic to think a miniature  adult passing for a prepubescent child (10-8), but that same person isn't going to realistically pass for 2 or 3 year old.

I think it's easy to incorporate subtle public babying in a diaper story without pushing the suspension of belief too far.  We know an adult can be diapered in public without too much issue, and to incorporate a caregiver in that story adds to the conflict.    However, realistically incorporating a stroller is always a bit harder.  I think most of the time that it happens, it's forced, and a wheel chair wouldn't be infantilizing enough.   The idea is that the little is babied in public like it is a normal thing, but it's not something that would cause outrage if it were really true (in the scope of the story).

One of the methods I've considered is to  utilize a push chair typically used for mobile impairments (mostly older children).   In one case, it would be a middle aged man who is publicly presented a patient with some dementia, and the push chair is used to prevent him from wandering off.  In most cases, merely dressing the person as a baby and pushing him/her in a stroller would not fit in the universe that story is created in, and would get undo attention.

[WBDaddy]

For the record, adult strollers are a thing.  They aren't cheap, but they do accommodate up to 250 pound people... https://www.adaptivemall.com/adaptive-star-axiom-lassen-push-chair.html

[ValentinesStuff]

IThere are other subtle or not so subtle ways. Mommy carrying a diaper bag. Juvenile looking clothing. I have a "Happy 1st Birthday" shirt in adult size from Zazzle. Carrying a stuffie or baby doll. 

Even things like bright primary color clothes.

Overalls, shortalls, or skirtalls, especially if the overalls or shortalls have a snap crotch. Onesies and rompers. https://feltmanbrothers.com/vintage-bobby-suit/ That screams toddler no matter how big the person wearing it is.

[Cute_Kitten]

To keep it realistic, you can also add an adult bib if they're going out to eat, maybe Caregiver feeds the Little, especially if they're in a pushchair/ adult stroller. There's adult bibs (usually called cover ups just like diapers are called absorbent briefs by medical staff, etc intended to preserve one's dignity etc). 

[spark]

1 hour ago, Cute_Kitten said:

To keep it realistic, you can also add an adult bib if they're going out to eat, maybe Caregiver feeds the Little, especially if they're in a pushchair/ adult stroller. There's adult bibs (usually called cover ups just like diapers are called absorbent briefs by medical staff, etc intended to preserve one's dignity etc). 

 

Depending on the context of the story, would that work.  It's easy to create an environment where that could reasonably work in a private situation.   

At least in my case, I know there are items out there that can realistically baby.  We know there are adult-sized baby items exist, but my question is more about how an author can present those in a way that makes sense in the context of the story.

There is always something cool in a story when the treatment is shifted out to a public setting, but I think there needs to some way to allow that happen.  If you have a story that is supposed to be in this reality, an adult being pushed in a stroller would cause a stir.    It definitely would not be acceptable in our world to change an adults diaper in a public setting, or giving somebody a bottle when they are in public.

[ValentinesStuff]

Depending upon the situation and location, simply calling ahead. A friend of mine knows a bunch of Furries that went bowling. They called the bowling alley and got permission ahead of time.

 

I think more importantly is realistic portrayal of other people. If you were to change an adult's diaper in a public park, someone is going to call the cops. An adult in a stroller will get looks, maybe comments, but not a call to the police. The same with a bottle. Wandering around in just a diaper and shirt, expect another call to the police. 

 

I remember reading very few stories where police are called for some pretty blatant public actions.

Oddly in a few cases when I asked authors about why no one called the police, but acted as if a grown man wearing just a diaper being walked around in public was normal and acceptable. The reply was "it isn't illegal." It may not be illegal, but that doesn't stop people from calling the cops or having a bad reaction. I don't think my landlady would appreciate me walking to her office in a diaper and t-shirt to drop off my rent check. 

[Cute_Kitten]

1 hour ago, spark said:

Depending on the context of the story, would that work.  It's easy to create an environment where that could reasonably work in a private situation.   

At least in my case, I know there are items out there that can realistically baby.  We know there are adult-sized baby items exist, but my question is more about how an author can present those in a way that makes sense in the context of the story.

There is always something cool in a story when the treatment is shifted out to a public setting, but I think there needs to some way to allow that happen.  If you have a story that is supposed to be in this reality, an adult being pushed in a stroller would cause a stir.    It definitely would not be acceptable in our world to change an adults diaper in a public setting, or giving somebody a bottle when they are in public.

As you said, it all depends on context.   I've used an adult stroller in public before in a story- it was set during Halloween, and the character the stroller belonged to had a physical disability and wore AFO braces. I kept it low key and causally mentioned they got some side-eyes from public eyes, but then people saw her braces and were like "oh okay".  I've had one character feed another character in public- in this case it was Valentine's Day, romantic restaurant. but no bib was involved in that scene. 

To get away with public babying and keep it realistic (or as realistic as possible), I'd say low key and subtlety are key.  Maybe dress the character in bright childish primary colors, or soft baby pastels. Something that's just juvenile enough that the most reaction would be some judgy people raising an eyebrow. "Really? Are you 12?" and just thinking the character has very poor fashion sense. 

I can't see a bottle working- unless it's played off as part of a Halloween costume, or maybe character is dressed up as Baby New Year and is taking the joke a little far. Or it's a frat/ sorority party/ initiation/ hazing.  Or one character blatantly bullying/ tormenting another- but that would get a lot of raised eyeballs in the public sphere. 

Maybe a pacifier worn as a necklace- but not used. Or at an outing to the zoo or aquarium, an adult carrying around a plushy bought in a gift shop. I feel a female character wouldn't raise quite so many eyebrows as a male character would? (People could just assume their holding it for their kid or something).  Personal story- I bought a cute little teal bat plushy from a museum, pre-Covid, and hung it from my purse. No one said anything and I didn't get any strange looks (that I noticed anyway LOL)

 

[spark]

19 minutes ago, ValentinesStuff said:

I remember reading very few stories where police are called for some pretty blatant public actions.

Oddly in a few cases when I asked authors about why no one called the police, but acted as if a grown man wearing just a diaper being walked around in public was normal and acceptable. The reply was "it isn't illegal." It may not be illegal, but that doesn't stop people from calling the cops or having a bad reaction. I don't think my landlady would appreciate me walking to her office in a diaper and t-shirt to drop off my rent check. 

That's why I mention keeping it in context of the story.   If the primary motivation is humiliation of the little, and the caregiver is not concerned, or even wants, to call attention to the little,  it makes sense to put the little in a stroller and point out their state.   Personally- I don't necessarily like those stories because their tend to hype up the cruelty.   If you're writing the story where the humiliation is subtle and private, having the little with a onesie under his clothes, or a pacifier in their pocket keeps the status clear while not presenting in a way that is unrealistic.  Mind you, even the most realistic diaper stories aren't very realistic.

How you approach it depends on the age of the protagonist.   Pushing a young teen, or young adult regardless of sex, in a stroller in public requires a suspension of belief.   There is no way that would be acceptable in a public setting, unless they were presented as somebody who had a high level of impairment.   And that generally would require a willing participation in the deception, which doesn't work in the plots of most diaper stories.    A lot authors use the 'extremely small person' device, and the protagonist is able to publicly present as a little kid.    That's unrealistic, but is the most common plot device used.   I could see the protagonist passing as young as 8, and then you can put that person in a stroller- as long as it's explained in someway. 

 

[spark]

41 minutes ago, Cute_Kitten said:

As you said, it all depends on context.   I've used an adult stroller in public before in a story- it was set during Halloween, and the character the stroller belonged to had a physical disability and wore AFO braces. I kept it low key and causally mentioned they got some side-eyes from public eyes, but then people saw her braces and were like "oh okay".  I've had one character feed another character in public- in this case it was Valentine's Day, romantic restaurant. but no bib was involved in that scene. 

To get away with public babying and keep it realistic (or as realistic as possible), I'd say low key and subtlety are key.  Maybe dress the character in bright childish primary colors, or soft baby pastels. Something that's just juvenile enough that the most reaction would be some judgy people raising an eyebrow. "Really? Are you 12?" and just thinking the character has very poor fashion sense. 

I can't see a bottle working- unless it's played off as part of a Halloween costume, or maybe character is dressed up as Baby New Year and is taking the joke a little far. Or it's a frat/ sorority party/ initiation/ hazing.  Or one character blatantly bullying/ tormenting another- but that would get a lot of raised eyeballs in the public sphere. 

Maybe a pacifier worn as a necklace- but not used. Or at an outing to the zoo or aquarium, an adult carrying around a plushy bought in a gift shop. I feel a female character wouldn't raise quite so many eyebrows as a male character would? (People could just assume their holding it for their kid or something).  Personal story- I bought a cute little teal bat plushy from a museum, pre-Covid, and hung it from my purse. No one said anything and I didn't get any strange looks (that I noticed anyway LOL)

 

I never thought about using a plushie, but that is a good way to connote a loving and comforting caregiver/little relationship.     I read a story awhile ago where the little was between 8 to 10, and she was put in a highchair at a McDonalds.   Based on the context of the story, it passed the reality test.    

I've got a story working where my protagonist is a middle-aged man who suffered unspecified incident (say a stroke) and no longer able to independently care for himself.   The basic conflict is within himself as he deals with his diminishing independence while enjoying the attention and care from his CG (in this case a younger sister).   In this case, I'm thinking of having the guy wander off and get lost in shop.   That makes the need for a push chair realistic 

[Cute_Kitten]

20 minutes ago, spark said:

I never thought about using a plushie, but that is a good way to connote a loving and comforting caregiver/little relationship.     I read a story awhile ago where the little was between 8 to 10, and she was put in a highchair at a McDonalds.   Based on the context of the story, it passed the reality test.    

I've got a story working where my protagonist is a middle-aged man who suffered unspecified incident (say a stroke) and no longer able to independently care for himself.   The basic conflict is within himself as he deals with his diminishing independence while enjoying the attention and care from his CG (in this case a younger sister).   In this case, I'm thinking of having the guy wander off and get lost in shop.   That makes the need for a push chair realistic 

If it's a stroke, you could also easily work in bibs (dignified adult 'cover ups', not ABDL ones with baby prints and things like "super pooper!" written on them) and the care giver feeding him if you wanted to. I don't mean to sound like I'm harping on the bib thing, just throwing it out there as an example of how to work stuff into a story.  Same as the push chair, there are different designs, etc of it, and you can have one that looks more like a big baby stroller- like the one WB posted.  He could wander off and get lost, or as a side effect of the stroke, maybe his stamina isn't what it used to be, or he may get unsteady on his feet after X amount of time and be in danger of falling. All of those would lead to a push chair being necessary.  Or it could be small things, too- like maybe after the stroke his hands don't work so good, so his CG has to help him tie his shoe laces, or he has velcro shoes.  Or adaptive clothing with snap crotches for easy diaper access. 

[ValentinesStuff]

5 hours ago, spark said:

Mind you, even the most realistic diaper stories aren't very realistic.

 

 

True. I think the more important things are both consistency and believability.

 

Is the story consistent. The characters act the same way and have a similar personality traits throughout the story, barring development. Too many times the loving CG will suddenly start beating the Little or humiliate them with no explanation. Also do the characters maintain a constant physical description and size. Again too many stories with a character that is a "normal" teenager and is wearing toddler clothes, sleeps in a crib, etc. Or in one chapter is four feet tall, and the next is getting hand me downs from their baby sister.

 

Believability. Once the initial premise is made, does the story remain believable? No you can't decide at 10 PM that Johnny's room needs to be remade as a nursery, and the next day go out and buy a complete set of adult, or even baby furniture, have it delivered, the room stripped, repainted and redecorated, all by 3 PM the next day. Nor is it likely that every kid but one on the block is a bedwetter wearing diapers, and the other kid secretly wishes he could wear diapers. 

 

Admittedly real world coincidences do happen. A friend of mine was approached by a co-worker that had determined his online AB identity. 

[spark]

19 hours ago, Cute_Kitten said:

If it's a stroke, you could also easily work in bibs (dignified adult 'cover ups', not ABDL ones with baby prints and things like "super pooper!" written on them) and the care giver feeding him if you wanted to. I don't mean to sound like I'm harping on the bib thing, just throwing it out there as an example of how to work stuff into a story.  Same as the push chair, there are different designs, etc of it, and you can have one that looks more like a big baby stroller- like the one WB posted.  He could wander off and get lost, or as a side effect of the stroke, maybe his stamina isn't what it used to be, or he may get unsteady on his feet after X amount of time and be in danger of falling. All of those would lead to a push chair being necessary.  Or it could be small things, too- like maybe after the stroke his hands don't work so good, so his CG has to help him tie his shoe laces, or he has velcro shoes.  Or adaptive clothing with snap crotches for easy diaper access. 

I never thought about using a bib, but that's a really good way to have the character publicly babied in a realistic way.   I have a couple of girlfriends who didn't know about my little side, but would definitely advocate my use of a bib.

[Babypants]

Bibs are commonplace in the real world.  Ask for one when you have a whole lobster set before you, and it will be in your hands in no time at all-- if it didn't come with your meal automatically.  I wouldn't dream of cracking a lobster without wearing a bib, and I always carry my own when going out to eat spaghetti or any other dish served with marinara sauce.  You should be  able to buy one at any hospital or medical supply shop.  And real ones are a heck of a lot cheaper than the ones specifically marketed online to adult babies.

[ValentinesStuff]

@Babypants

https://www.amazon.com/hz/mobile/mission?p=h4MRzlbe7IA%2BxfBrDJ%2FQBJkJsyvlqzYXnmZFKedq%2Fc%2FN6XFYzDF4FradQalbilWgxd0%2B5BAbUcSe6AEezpkDmcfvY4IPKInTCGL04Fi4C6zewcadirmgPCcBFp0EGP7dLLJxd%2Ffbvsa6Ro1lp5gN5N0ahMjMLs3sgBG5rmSVzeZYr%2FBdmT7xtPPXI9woE183gJ0iG2TAGyDQKvcdyLgYVhlkmlZvsN%2BVKI2Eo%2FnzxT%2BI8OCYI%2Fcnef3Vcks4Df769gH%2Blyc0x23ITM4W9TOzl24BHMw23OABJAtfi2sFST0bWD1%2FwpKNz04TSIUsB4Xj%2B3d53o9fbihbezGtI44tIy2Q7P5%2F4vPkCMZBNDZP0%2FDqVtcnaIIjEzx991dkm4cfg%2FG7EgnoqMT5AZLVN2UHQ3OIerNqWGEI&ref_=ci_mcx_mi&pf_rd_r=YP309Z89BXVT7RMX92X2&pf_rd_p=95d3cc2d-d2eb-448e-8fa8-f88a54668d87&pd_rd_r=f817732b-7d31-4a00-a8bf-ffed5ef918df&pd_rd_w=7G2tF&pd_rd_wg=B4n63

 

Oddly these just started popping up in my Amazon feed.

[LittleFenny]

Consistency and believability are as mentioned something you need if you want to story to be realistic or feel realistic even if unrealistic. I recall there was a story posted maybe five or six years ago, I thought here on this forum but a quick search didn't spot it, which if I remember correctly starts with with a person in a coffee shop becoming puzzled as they notice someone wearing a pacifier either on a chain or pinned ribbon. Then more over the next few days. Eventually hearing that it's a fad brought on by some celebrity doing it and other celebrities copying the first. Then instead of just having a pacifier dangling from a necklace or ribbon people have them in their mouths when they aren't drinking or talking. Because the fad shifted when some of the celebrities decided to take it further. Over the course of a few months the 'fanting (or infanting) fad goes further. Not just pacifiers but shirts with children's characters on them, pastel overalls become best sellers, adult rompers, even the character realizes some people going so far as to wear diapers. But just wear them of course, not-- oh, some celebrity decided to go all in and do hard core fanting? And right about the time the viewpoint character starts to see this as normal, the trend setters start doing something else and the fanting fad is over. A few people keep their pacifier necklace or keep rocking a romper but they stand out because that's now passé, really bro are you still doing that? That's so last month.

By the end of the story it's not so realistic. Really? People will cheerfully take their coffee shop coffee in a bottle and suck it down while filling their diaper, just because a couple of movie stars, a rapper, and a twenty-something brat born with more money than many countries are doing it? But because it started both small and with that you could picture some celebrities doing, and then took a small step each time it didn't feel utterly unrealistic in the way a story that started with someone showing up in a full ABDL outfit and saying, "Yeah, but everyone's doing this after Famous Celebrity showed up on Famous Show like this," would have felt.

I had a story idea in which I wanted a world that was no a diaper dimension or simple fetish fantasy but in which there was greater acceptance of the idea that some, not most but some, of the adults around you might be wearing diapers. If I was to suggest a rule it's that if you are going to stretch the 'reality' of the story then you need to double down on the consistency. Don't just have someone walking around with no one blinking at the waistband of a diaper peeking out of their jeans, try asking why this world is different and what follows on from that change. In this story idea a good thirty or forty years earlier you have a combination political and religious group, The Pure, that while it was never anything but a small minority of the population was also very loud in making demands and initially seen as politically useful. Various incontinence and disability groups alternately saw The Pure as useful for getting changes they wanted and also pushing to remind people that, "Hey! Not everyone you see in a diaper is one of those people, most of us are just trying to live our lives not make political points." So by the time of the story there's better availability of quality diapers, you might get a second look if someone notices the North Shore package in your cart or realizes you use one of the handful of changing rooms in the office building rather than the toilets right down the hall, but they're not likely to be shocked. "Oh, I hadn't realized that about Joe," rather than, "O.M.G.! You won't believe what I just discovered about Joe!" On the other hand in the setting of the story if you had a teen or adult dressed like a toddler and being babied in public, that would still get stares and depending on where possibly requests that they go do that somewhere else. The setting is more diaper positive but such behavior would still be inconsistent with the societal mores of the world. If you want that in a story then you need to ask what changes take place such that it doesn't violate the social mores.

[quietlyhumiliated]

On 4/13/2023 at 8:42 PM, LittleFenny said:

I recall there was a story posted maybe five or six years ago, I thought here on this forum but a quick search didn't spot it, which if I remember correctly starts with with a person in a coffee shop becoming puzzled as they notice someone wearing a pacifier either on a chain or pinned ribbon. Then more over the next few days. Eventually hearing that it's a fad brought on by some celebrity doing it and other celebrities copying the first. Then instead of just having a pacifier dangling from a necklace or ribbon people have them in their mouths when they aren't drinking or talking. Because the fad shifted when some of the celebrities decided to take it further. Over the course of a few months the 'fanting (or infanting) fad goes further.

I do believe that this is a story of mine called 'Now Trending.' It was posted here a few years ago, but I think it got erased/purged/vanished (with a bunch of other stories I had shared around that time). Here's a link to the story on my Tumblr though: https://www.tumblr.com/quietlyhumiliated/133633188600/now-trending?source=share  

Thanks for reminding me of this - it was a fun thought experiment to think about at the time. And you should flesh out your idea into a story!

[Babypants]

My late wife was a great seamstress, and she made baby outfits for us to wear to Halloween competitions.  I took first prize four times, and her costume was always in the top five.  I won by simply behaving more outrageously than other contestants, including my wife.  Waitresses loved bringing me baby bottle after baby bottle of beer.  A good time was had by all.

Suspension of belief is, therefore, a flexible concept.  What is not realistic in one setting might seem gritty realism in another.  I always encourage would-be writers to think character first, plot second, and props a distant third.  A writer can (and in fetish literature frequently does) center a story on a prop, but the more it dominates the work, the more likely it is that the writer will have to take liberties with reality to keep things fresh.