Diapers In A Relationship

[BBoy]

Please, I am looking for responses from DL's not AB's or other people who are wanting to express their fantasies. I need some honest and frank advice. Please and thanks.

I am looking for info on how others have resolved a sucessful DL-non DL relationship.

My girlfriend is still uncomfortable around diapers and doesn't know how others deal with a DL-normal person relationship. Looking around here there is not much focused discussion of how a DL (not an AB) has a relationship with a spouse that is not into diapers. So I am trying to find some information.

Background: I only wear for enjoyment and rarely pee in a diaper (never do #2). I only wear for comfort and a little for sextual arousal but mainly I just have a desire to wear. Before we started going out a 8 months ago she had never heard of DL's not an interest in wearing. 4 months into the relationship I told her about my desire to wear diapers and she has been very good about it and I have worn a couple of times around her with my clothes on. She is still a little uncomfortable being around with diapers and the sound they make but has said she is okay if I wear they under clothes once and a while.

Some of the questions I have...

How often do you wear?

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship?

Do you wear them to bed?

Do you make out in a diaper?

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship?

Thanks again.

[rickibrat2]

from my point of view you will find it hard to find execpatnce from others it is really hard to find even for those of us that wear for real

[WetterGuy]

BBoy,

I'm a DL and my wife isn't into diapers. Thankfully, she accepts me for who I am. If I had my way I would wear all the time. Out of respect for her, I fight my desire to wear, and I usually wear only 2-3 days a week. Before I met her I wore diapers in bed every night. Now I wear in bed very rarely.

The best thing you can do is show some compromise for your gf and make sure to give her plenty of the things she loves about you. Show her that diapers, while part of who you are, don't define you. She is already giving of herself by being around you with diapers under your clothes. I'm sure that was a big step for her. For now be accepting of that and let her know your appreciation. As you both talk about it and work through it, it will become less of a big deal. And if she leaves you because of it, then your relationship was probably not meant to be.

Peace and best wishes to you.

[Three Rivers]

Years ago I had an urge to bring something different into our relationship, we had been married for over 20yrs at this point in time. I told my wife that I would like to play in diapers, like the kind adults wear. I told her that I planned to use them as well. She said that if that made me happy and as long as the kids didn't see it , that it was ok with her.

I am a true DL, as this is a sexual thing for me as well. Diapers have always brought things to attention later on. I expalined to her that I wouldn't wear them if they ever bothered her, and she said "If it bothers me I'll let you know". She even suggested places to buy them. At first it was just on the weekends. I would go change after work on Friday's and wear on Saturday and Sunday as well, but mostly in the evening's. With our 2 teenage kids in and out of the house on weekends. My diaper time was limited to nights. After a few months of play time, she offered one night to change me out of a wet one, she then proceded to apply powder generously and apply a fresh diaper. It was difficult to keep things from firming up if you know what I mean.

Well I took it slow, and eventualy she has asked me to wear to bed for some other type of play time. I now wear almost daily. Funny sometimes when I get home if I don't change within an hour or so, she'll ask me when I'm going to change. It just takes time for your partner to accept that you are still the same person, and know that it's not evil or strange. It's just a different way to play.

She now like's me in a diaper, and likes to play Mommy every know and then. The AB play is mostly in the bedrooom, but it works for us. Every couple is different. As it has been a few yrs now, she will change my diapers without question(wet or messy). What a women!

You can't force a change or lifestyle on someone without a lot of resistance. Take it slow, communicate back and forth. You need to respect her feelings as well. Remember it takes two to tango.

So to answer your specific questions in order

1. I wear almost daily.

2. I don't wear if she doesn't want me to. (respect)

3. I only wear to bed for play time.

4. Yes

5. Accepts it as my play time

6. none.

I hope this helps you and your quest for change and acceptance.

Three Rivers

[onsie]

BBOY: As a DL, with a wife who really isn't into it, she loves me enough to accept. I wish for more and yet I'm thankful for her tolerance. Hopefully she'll understand its just apart of who you are. Best of luck...

[Guest]

Please, I am looking for responses from DL's not AB's or other people who are wanting to express their fantasies. I need some honest and frank advice. Please and thanks.

I am looking for info on how others have resolved a sucessful DL-non DL relationship.

My girlfriend is still uncomfortable around diapers and doesn't know how others deal with a DL-normal person relationship. Looking around here there is not much focused discussion of how a DL (not an AB) has a relationship with a spouse that is not into diapers. So I am trying to find some information.

Background: I only wear for enjoyment and rarely pee in a diaper (never do #2). I only wear for comfort and a little for sextual arousal but mainly I just have a desire to wear. Before we started going out a 8 months ago she had never heard of DL's not an interest in wearing. 4 months into the relationship I told her about my desire to wear diapers and she has been very good about it and I have worn a couple of times around her with my clothes on. She is still a little uncomfortable being around with diapers and the sound they make but has said she is okay if I wear they under clothes once and a while.

Some of the questions I have...

How often do you wear?

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship?

Do you wear them to bed?

Do you make out in a diaper?

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship?

Thanks again.

Only one of my exs has any real problem with my diapers, and even she just took an "out of sight, out of mind" atttitude.

I wear 24/7. Some girls even changed me on occasion, like Tasha. We were camping, and I still can't change myself when laying down, so she did it as a long as I did any necessary messy clean-up.

My current girlfriend isn't a huge fan of them, but she's more than ok with them. Her only gripe is when we get intimate and she takes my diaper off and it ends up on her pile of clothes. Easy to fix.

[prettygirl]

well coming from a woman I had always had the desire to wear,and finally I started hinting around to hubby that I wanted to wear . Yes he laughed at first and didnt take it seriousley so I dropped it. The one day I brought it up again. I said I again how it would be enjoyable and he still thought it was strange but let me try it. Only during a sexual time that is it. I do wear on my own free time with out him knowing and even knowing the desire i have, He still dont get it and really doesnt accept it only for his own pleasure of me wearing during sexual times.He teases me alot as by saying I can wear but then says I could never let you wear for awhile he says he wouldnt feel right.

So I guess even then I have given it time he dont accept it as much as I would like him too and my desires.

So I wear on my days off secretely

I dont wear at night

allowed to wear seldom only during sexual times

hubby not to accepting

and I do think it can affect a relationship because if someone loves you they should understand what you want as long as you are not hurting anyone. Its a need inside that needs to be filled .Whats it to them ,you are not forcing them to wear so I dont see a problem.

Guess it all depends on the person you are with and how understanding they will be to your wants and desire.And how far they will let you go with it.

[AutieAB]

My fiancée doesn't 'get the diaper thing' either but is accepting of me as who I am. Slowly, very slowly is the way to go. Do not push the issue at all, just let it happen. Three Rivers hit the nail square on the head - you have to let her realise in her own time, that it's just part of you and you're still the same person she's known from the start. You may find she starts to want to get more involved (as understanding increases) and of course, equally, you may find that she doesn't.

Despite the fact that I know my wonderful fiancée will accept me no matter what I tell her, I think a contributing factor to her acceptance was that I was completely honest from the very beginning (a few weeks in). I think this helped because she's always known that it's an inseparable part of my persona rather than having it sprung as a surprise later on. I've been stung in the past by my own dishonesty and learned that half-truths are no better than outright lies. It's whole truth or no truth - that's just the way it's got to be. After the initial disclosure (when we talked a lot) not a lot was said for quite a long time but we're now at a point where it can be discussed, where if I'm diapered its no big deal and I get the odd cheeky comment from time to time although I still find it a bit embarrassing (but I kinda like it that way ).

How often do you wear?

Depends on a load of other factors that I'm not going into here but varies dramatically between 24/7 and one a week or less.

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship?

The boundaries are intuitively detected, are generally flexible. I know if I'm on the limit and then I back off (although not without a couple of mistakes). Poop is off limits and I respect that.

Do you wear them to bed?

Also varies. But sometimes, yeah.

Do you make out in a diaper?

We haven't got there yet. Don't know if we ever will but I won't be disappointed if we don't.

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

Well I think she understands that it's just part of me, we've talked quite a lot about what I believe are my 'diaper roots' so to speak and that helped too. She says that she hopes I don't need my diapers one day but she knows that diapered or not, I'm still the same person inside.

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship?

Almost none.

Hope this helped

AutieAB

[baby_joshie]

Well my wife and I have been married for 6 months now. Early in our dating relationship i told her. I dont think she completely understands. She seems to think it is only for sexual gratification. We have played together. made out, and had diaper sex a once. But when it comes to just wanting to watch some TV diapered she gets all huffy/annoid. and she is like ... "you did it last week..." thats seems to be her attidtude 95% of the time.

But last night she was reading my mind. she told me before dinner to change myself. I did. and used it #1. later before bed she went all dominant mommy on me and made me lay down and changed me. she has only done that 3 or 4 times in the 2 years she has known.

soo really just go slow and treasure what she wil let you do. I will remember last night for a while. It was nice. she even rubbed by bum to help me sleep. (I think she liked the feel of the rubber pants)

[Loveable_guy]

Three Rivers has hit it square on the head. The one comment I want to add is that while my wife is not crazy about my diapering she has accepted this completely and this has allowed us to grow closer that ever before. She will on occasion order me around and de-pants me while doing the dinner dishes. Of course she knows I am diapered and then takes swats at my diapered ass.

I’ll wear ever day but rarely to bed as I don’t sleep as well. Something about the sexual arousal that keeps me from sleeping.

As all have said, go slow and be sure to give back twice what you receive. If she loves you she’ll come around. And if not better to cut your losses while she is just your girl friend..

One comment for Three Rivers, an empty house is a wonderful thing. Its just the wife and I now, kids are grown and moved on to their own homes. I can wear as often as I like and its great!.

[DLK]

Please, I am looking for responses from DL's not AB's or other people who are wanting to express their fantasies. I need some honest and frank advice. Please and thanks.

I am looking for info on how others have resolved a sucessful DL-non DL relationship.

My girlfriend is still uncomfortable around diapers and doesn't know how others deal with a DL-normal person relationship. Looking around here there is not much focused discussion of how a DL (not an AB) has a relationship with a spouse that is not into diapers. So I am trying to find some information.

Background: I only wear for enjoyment and rarely pee in a diaper (never do #2). I only wear for comfort and a little for sextual arousal but mainly I just have a desire to wear. Before we started going out a 8 months ago she had never heard of DL's not an interest in wearing. 4 months into the relationship I told her about my desire to wear diapers and she has been very good about it and I have worn a couple of times around her with my clothes on. She is still a little uncomfortable being around with diapers and the sound they make but has said she is okay if I wear they under clothes once and a while.

Some of the questions I have...

How often do you wear?

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship?

Do you wear them to bed?

Do you make out in a diaper?

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship?

Thanks again.

[DLK]

Sorry about the first post, wrong button. Well, there are alot of lucky guys out there! As for me, I told my wife when we were dating, she was ok with it at first. However, this has changed over the last 2 yrs, for the worse unfortunately, she cries whenever I have a diaper on in front of her. It is sexual for me and I think that bothers her or makes her feel inadequte. I try to talk to her about it, but its always "not now" or something like that. As for your questions, I only wear when she is not home or when she is on the computer and I'm in another room. I don't mean to waste anybody's time, I guess I don't really have any advice that hasn't already been given.

DLK

[shyguydiapered]

I told my girlfriend very early on in our relationship about my diaper wearing. She wasn't crazy about it but she accepted it. She would occassionally wear but I think it embarrassed her. We have now been married for fifteen years and diapers are still part of our life. She now enjoys them very much and wears on a regular basis.I wear every night to bed and as often as I can through the day.She wears quite often to bed and has just recently began wearing under her clothes through the day.Diapers play a huge role in our love making. My wife now finds it very easy to get extremely aroused in diapers.I realize I am very lucky to have a wife that participates in diaper wearing.I have been extremely patient with my wife and I have never forced her to participate if she did not want to.It is crucial to keep a positive atmosphere and do not criticise your partner if they do not want to participate.Hopefully my comments will help other couples enjoy diapers more.

[evitar]

Personally I was a little sneaky with telling my spouce. she was very new to sexuality, having grown up in a very strict house, and I didn't think it would go over well. I had a job which required me to be outside for a good chunk of the day in the city, and I have a bit of an over-active bladder. There were several times where I peed a little in my pants before I could find a bathroom. Being a DL I had the perfect solution...but I didn't want the then Girlfriend to find out. Im a very disorganized person however, and I knew eventually I would slip up, and have some explaning to do (I had not worn diapers since we moved in together a year earlier, and therefor didnt have any in the house.)

I decided that I would tell her, but down play the excitement about it, and play up my embarasment in having to resort to diapers, which I assured her was the only solution I could think of. To my surprise she was totally cool with it, and thought it was a good idea, I asked her to marry me right there and then.

at first I was very shy about wearing diapers infront of her and would only do it beofre going to work...I would refer to them as my "special undies", and ask if they made my ass look big...eventually I became more and more comfortable with it, and started talking to her about some of the challenges...one of which was diapering my self. To my surprise again she offered to do it for me.

Then something strange happened, after a few weeks of diapering me everyday before work she went into a complete reversal, and asked me to be more descrete about my diaper wearing. I obliged and went back into the closet, so to speak. To this day I don't know what happened, maybe I went too fast.

I have started to push the enveloppe again, as it has been a year since she asked me to be more descrete...staying in a wet diaper for a few hours when I get home, crawling into bed after work wearing nothing but a onsie and a diaper, and taking a nap. and she seems to be getting more comfortable with it.

A few weeks ago I had a flu, and told her I was gonna take a day off and stay in bed to get better, and she recomended I wear a diaper so I would not have to get up so much...she didnt diaper me, but she is starting to be more comfortable with it again...which is nice.

[paradox]

I am an AB/DL and i just hatced this onto my gf recently, I tend to wear every other day on average and do wet them. My gf is not ok with the AB side and is ok with me wearing diapers. She thinks its wierd but lets it go because she sees me happier. They might make her uncomfortable but if she is, she does not voice it. She may not participate but at least she is open to it. I am being a lil sly though as i gradually get her more into it

[Saladin1976]

How often do you wear?

- Usually once a month or so

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship?

- I only wear when she's not around. She will wear for me on special request. (I request this no more than once a year, but that's not a rule). Other than that, we almost never talk about it.

Do you wear them to bed?

- Only when she's not at home

Do you make out in a diaper?

- Usually if this is during one of those 'special request' periods, we will always make out at least once.

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

- She's fine with it, under the current boundaries. (As far as I know- it's been 7 years since I told her)

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship?

- I was pretty tense until I told her about it. Since then, things have been great.

[wsdler]

How often do you wear? - Just about every day but I have phases. Sometimes I'm interested more than others. Sometimes I'll be 24/7 for nearly a month. Right now I'm wearing to bed but not so much interested in wearing during the day. I have less desire to wear when the temps go up.

What are the boundaries do diapers have in your relationship? - I don't have a strong desire to see her in diapers or have her wear. Although I certainly wouldn't mind, her participation is not a need or a requirement. In addition unless she had a genuine interest in wearing it would have absolutely no appeal for me. That said we've never discussed boundaries. If she had any, she's the type that would have brought it up.

Do you wear them to bed? - Yes

Do you make out in a diaper? - Yes but it's not a "I want to make out in a diaper" thing. If it leads to sex and I'm wearing I shower first. Watersports is different, she's wet her panties for me and she's peed on me but there's no denyin' that things don't smell that great after you've been sitting in a wet diaper for a few hours. She's never asked me to shower before, I do it voluntarily as the clammy feeling and the smell would make me too self conscious to be comfortable.

How does your girlfriend/wife deal with your desire to wear a diaper?

How much tension has diapers caused in your relationship? - I'll answer the last two together. I'm glad I told her as I have someone to talk to now about my feelings. I've accepted the fact that I'm a DL and have stopped trying to resist it. It isn't hurting anyone, it doesn't interfere with my business or personal life, etc. If I could flip a switch and turn off these strong desires I most certainly would. I've talked about this with her and her point of view was that she was glad this was something I could do discretely with a relatively low risk of anyone finding out. She mentioned that it's much more difficult for cross dressers and people with other such fetishes to be as discrete with their fetishes as the nature of the fetish visibly alters one appearance.

I wear as much as I want and as often as I want. Her only objection is to the crinkling sound and it has nothing to do with the diapers. She doesn't like the sound of certain allergenic pillows, grocery bags... basically rustling sounds. LOL The Molicare Super Pluses that I wear to bed are relatively quiet and the supers that I wear during the day are quiet when worn under jeans and virtually silent with jeans and plastic pants. If I need to be ultra discrete I wear Tena Supers as those are the stealth fighter of diapers in terms of noise.

[willnotwill]

In the last two long term relationships I have been in my GF has found out about the diapers.

The first caught me on the computer and shared some of her own (non-diaper fantasies)

with me as well. We did a small amount of playing (I even diapered her once), but we

really didn't play well together.

My current wife found my stash and was really curious and so I went through a whole

weekend practically of showing her everything. From then on for about five years or

so I was diapered every night. She even made me really nice cloth diapers. Some

times she'd keep me diapered all weekend. I got to a point where I decided I didn't

want to wear everynight so we stopped, but she's still cool with it and if we weren't so

darned busy we'd play more.

[CDLover]

My wife knew of my interest in diaper wearing and wetting before we married. She is accepting and has even participated in some play time. She is not interested in changing me though.

Last night I didn't wear diapers to bed and she commented, "You're naked tonight?" as she expected me to wear diapers.

One of the things that has been said here and should be said again, is that first you need to be honest with her and at the same time be respectful of her desires. My wife asked that I don't wear EVERY night.... so I try no to, even though I now sleep better while diapered.

Good luck.

CDL

[AutieAB]

One of the things that has been said here and should be said again, is that first you need to be honest with her and at the same time be respectful of her desires.

Good things come to those who wait

and

You only reap what you sow

[meretrix]

I told my wife when I was married to her for 5 months. She didn't understand it and I let her think about it for several days. I told her I felt comfortable in them and they also sexually gratified me. She didn't understand still and said she didn't want me wearing them. I pushed it on her agian about 2 weeks later and she got very upset. We almost split over it. I dropped it and now I don't wear. Though I still think about it now and then. That's it..

[Guest diapered469]

How often?: A few times a week

Boundaries?: Definitely no messy changes (I rarely do that anyway) and she's still pretty leery of changing a wet one...she's done it a couple times in a couple years since she's known.

To bed?: Yes. I mentioned a few weeks ago that they help me have good dreams; she suggested i wear every night. but I still dont some nights.

Make out?: Diapers are usually post-sex. If we do start making out while wearing, its usually taken off fairly soon.

How she deals?: She pretty much takes the "you're not hurting anyone else/it's kinda cute" approach to it. She knows they're just a small part of me...sometimes she won't even mention that I'm wearing one when she didnt know i put one on.

Tension?: I guess the biggest tension they might bring is the fact that I'm unable to come when I have sex with her (I've never been unable to come with a woman through any means...I guess because of my fetish.) Which leads me to my question: Has anyone else had this problem and overcome it? If so, how?

[Loveable_guy]

I told my wife when I was married to her for 5 months. She didn't understand it and I let her think about it for several days. I told her I felt comfortable in them and they also sexually gratified me. She didn't understand still and said she didn't want me wearing them. I pushed it on her agian about 2 weeks later and she got very upset. We almost split over it. I dropped it and now I don't wear. Though I still think about it now and then. That's it..

You about six months late talking to her about this fetish. Don’t push it or you may very well loose her.

When I decided to spring this great love of diapers on my gal of 25 years we were at a point in our lives that if we did split it would not effect the children, both grown by then.

I would hold off on any more surprises or you may find your things on the front steps

[BabyChris121675]

I was in a good relationship, but it was not diapers that did it in, we were just too different. She and I were a couple for nine months, but we got too sick of each other.

I told her about the diaper thing, and she was ok with it, but did not like the idea of playing, cause she found it weird, and unusual. Still, as I said, that was not what caused the relationship to break up. We are still good friends despite there being a distance between us cause she got a job in another part of Ohio.

Just gotta be positive about it all I guess, and not take the baby thing too seriously, I guess.

BabyChris121675

[RMS401]

My love for diapers has waxed and waned over the years, sometimes disappearing completely. But just as I got married I also took a job in which I traveled a lot, giving me plenty of time to get into trouble. You know how it goes: you're in a strange town where no one knows you and you can buy or do anything you want without fear of being recognised. Well, that was all I needed and I was back into diapers.

I finally screwed up the courage to tell my wife about this and she did not take it well. She seemed so devastated that I promised I'd quit immediately. I don't think I have to tell you how that ended. A couple years later I confessed that I had been unable to quit and that this was a part of me. We sought counseling, but the guy was a jackass and did absolutely nothing for us. All he did was talk incessantly about why I might have this fetish. Thanks a lot, doc.

Just as I was about to offer to quit again, my lovely wife told me that she'd try to make peace with it. That was about two years ago. She still wants nothing to do with my diapers, has never seen one, and if I have anything to say about it, never will. This is something I do only when I have the house to myself (like now). She knows I do it (and is probably trying not to picture me in a diaper right now), but just doesn't talk about it.

Diapers will never be a part of our relationship, but our marriage is good enough in all other ways that I don't think it will be much of a hindrance, either.

-RMS