Where Do You Draw The Line For What Makes Someone A Ab Or Dl?

[Nat]

I am wondering where you guys draw the line for what would make someone a DL or an AB.

Okay I think someone who enjoys kid shows still doesn't make them an AB. But it can be part of it.

Someone sleeping with a stiffed animal doesn't make them AB but it can be part of it.

I also think someone who wears diapers only and doesn't do any baby play or use any baby items is not an AB.

Someone who wears diapers for a need and they don't really enjoy them and they would rather use the bathroom like everyone else, not a DL.

What would people have to be doing for you to consider them an AB or DL?

With me, before I consider an incontinent person a DL is they have to enjoy their diapers and like wearing them and not want to give them up.

Someone who is into wearing diapers or has the desires to is a DL.

Someone who has a desire for a crib or a stroller or other baby items would make them an AB. Same as if they have a nursery or just baby items.

And what would you not consider someone a AB or DL? eg. you don't consider astronauts DLs just because they wear them while they are doing it or you might not consider someone a DL if they have to wear diapers to work because they are not allowed a potty break and they can't hold it that long.

[sarah_ab]

I feel someone who is an AB is well most importantly someone who identifies as that...

but is someone who enjoys acting as and being treated as a baby.

Anyone can enjoy watching cartoons, can like stuffed animals or coloring, but that doesn't mean they want to fully act like a baby, or be treated like one.

As an adult, I enjoy cartoons.

As an adult, I enjoy getting a build a bear when on vacation

As an adult i enjoy sometimes just coloring because its relaxing

none of those things make me an ab.

I am an AB because i enjoy talking like, acting like, a baby, and having someone treat me accordingly. Diapers do not have to be part of a roleplaying session, they are just another propr to make me feel more like a baby, such as a pacifier, or a bottle...

[Diapered Jason]

The way I understand it is the difference between an AB and a DL is the psychological perspective.

For example, I am a diaper lover. I look at diapers as a form of discipline and sexual stimulation. As you can guess I have other BDSM fetishes; however, I enjoy pacifiers, baby bottles, and probably cribs too because that helps complete the experience that I am not in control, but at the mercy of the top, and it adds to the humiliation as well.

I hope an AB posts here as it is likely they would tell you their situation better than I can. Seeing as I am not an AB and have not met an AB, I can only guess, but judging from what I have read, their persepctive pertains more to the inner child. They want to be regressed.

[Diapered Jason]

ha, an AB posted as I was writing my post

[happyindprs]

In my opinion, an adult baby is everything to do with regressing to a babies appropriate age mind set. Props such as bottles, pacifiers, baby food, baby clothes,rattles and stuffed animals help with the regression. The adult babies that I have as friends, like the nurturing, secure and innocent feelings they experience while being regressed. They crave attention from an adult caregiver type of a person to complete the experience.

Diaper lovers, of which I am one of them, love the thought and the feel of diapers. For most but certainly not all it is of a sexual nature. Wearing diapers for practical reasons, or just because they feel so damn good is the norm. Diaper lovers may also enjoy wearing a onesie or using a pacifier on occasion but it is not paramount to enjoying the DL experience. Diaper lovers tend to live in the adult world in real time and do not regress to the baby mind set. They do however enjoy the comfort and security from wearing a diaper.

[Toddler Pampers]

Let's not forget the AB/DL, that is, the person for whom regressing would not be possible without diapers. In this thread, we have heard from an AB who doesn't need diapers to role play, which makes her strictly an AB. Let me just say that I think the AB is very rare. Nearly everyone who enjoys playing baby is a DL, as in, the diaper being an essential prop.

I also believe that most people who describe themselves as DL are really AB/DL. I've said this before, to much catcalling from the audience, that I believe a DL is about as rare as an AB. Unless you wear diapers to feel like an astronaut or an invalid, you wear them to feel like a baby inasmuch as they make you feel safe and secure. These are 'babyish' feelings whether people acknowledge them as such or not.

Finally, I like the feeling, again babyish, of having decisions made for me. I think I grew up with a lot of anxiety which I escaped from by playing baby. A diaper is a metaphor for being relieved of making the decisions you would otherwise need to. Voluntarily giving up control isn't normal when viewed alone, but it is a perfectly rational response to acute anxiety and stress. And remember that you aren't really giving up control, just pretending. Being diapered makes me feel like a baby, which, in turn, diminishes stress and anxiety, making me feel better, obviously.

Let me say, though, that the stress and anxiety I felt thirty years ago is gone. Then I worried so much about the future. Now I don't at all for reasons I won't go into. I would not develop a 'recreational' interest in diapers in my current life, I'm quite sure. So it's interesting that I still very much enjoy wearing them in order to pretend I'm a totally cared for baby. I suppose I must have grown to like how they feel physically, like a hug. Even though my life is great and my future is rosy and clear, I still feel insecure, which I think is a feeling that is a lot more ingrained than stress and anxiety, which are more situation specific.

[padded_husky]

As an adult, I enjoy getting a build a bear when on vacation

I absolutely second that notion! Going to build a bear work shop is such a special experience! first you pick out your plushy then they help yah stuff it. You got to huggles it till it is stuffed to perfection. then you grab it a heart and you give it a kiss and make a wish on it and they bring it to life! then after you give it some clothes you create a birth certificate and now you have a new special friend.

Anyways, reading this topic has made me wonder what that makes me. I mean I use to consider myself a baby fur but now im not sure what I am. I mean I am not sexually into diapers (well I could be) and even though I am some what of a subby myself, I actually love diapers for many reasons. I outside of the way they feel and the thickness...etc I also like them because they make me feel safe. They give me peace of mind and when I am wearing and wetting them, it is like someone is saying to me "It is OK, everything will be alright!" If given the opportunity, I would wear a onesies and some baby stuff. I would really like to own sleepers and I would really like to own a furry sleeper with ears and a tail. I have a baby bottle but honestly I really don't get into that very much. I mean the bottle doesn't really help me regress any and honestly I find myself having a hard time doing so.

I don't really get into acting or talking like a baby but I would not mind to experience having a caregiver and I would not mind being taken care of but I don't exactly like being a baby either. So does that make me a dl then? I am not really that sexually attracted to diapers at all and although I could get into humiliation of them and some bdsm but that is not why I wear diapers at all. For me it is a special feeling that makes me feel nice. I have always been confused on what an adult kid was. I mean Would that make me a kid furry or something? what is an adult kid anyways?

[diaperbrownie]

There is no major distinction. We have garnered an ability to divy up this lifestyle into sections, but there really aren't any defining boundaries. We all like the same things, and all share common qualities. I don't know why we have fucked up a simple scenario, and created little "clicks" when it's all one giant lifestyle.

[bbgirlmichelle]

What is an adult kid anyways?

In my opinion an Adult Kid is someone who doesn't regress to babyhood. For me, Adult Babies regress to age three and under, which would encompass Adult Toddlers.

I always thought I was an AB because I regressed and liked wearing diapers, but I don't regress to Babyhood. When I'm little, I'm able to walk around, hold conversations (though my speech definitely isn't as refined as when I'm not regressed), I'm able to go and get myself a drink and a bowl of cereal, simple things. I'd say I regress to an age somewhere between 3 and 5 maybe 6, but refuse to give up my diapers and paci.

I think everyone has their own opinion of how they fit into the spectrum, one person's view of AB is not going to be the same as another.

*huggles*

Michelle

[BabyTara]

I think the major distinction is what the individual classifies themself as.

I am an AB (I'm in the 2-4 year range). I love wearing and using diapers, using my binky , bottles and sippy cups , getting bubble baths from Daddy with a lotion massage after, snuggles, cute babyish clothes, coloring... Basically anything that an actual toddler would do or want.

[Diapered Jason]

I think what we are a little confused on is the "safe and secure" feeling as this is an AB tendency. As a diaper lover, I do not have these feelings. Once I finish my orgasm, I longer want to wear diapers. I don't have an age at which I play at.

Secondly, diaperbrownie, there is a major distinction, it is definitely not a simple scenario, or a lifestyle for all of us. For example, as a male DL, I cannot hang out with a female AB. It would not work. While she wears diapers for an innocent reason (I of course respect that), I will want 'for a lack of a better word' to punish her, not to give her a coloring book or a stuffed animal, and I hope for the same in return. An AB would definitely not enjoy that.

[sarah_ab]

in writing responses it might be best if people write what is true for them and not generalize to all abs or dls.... im an ab and it is entirely sexual a form of sexual roleplay ... its about beind dominated and controlled... not about feeling safe and secure for me....

i think this is a great topic because it is allowing everyone to share their own views of themself and their relationship to ab or dl ism

[Diapered Jason]

My apologies Sarah. I realize it might be impossible to generalize ABs and DLs, but I know they are very different.

I am curious though as to why you think you are an AB if it is sexual role play for you. I know by definition you are not an infantilist. You can decline that question if you want to as it is a very private matter.

[Toddler Pampers]

iim an ab and it is entirely sexual a form of sexual roleplay ... its about beind dominated and controlled... not about feeling safe and secure for me....

I always start out enjoying just the feeling of being a baby, that is, having all decisions made for me so that I don't have a thing to worry about. It's when the pee hits my diaper that I start to think how much fun I'm having. Being diapered first feels great emotionally and then feels great physically later on. Not surprisingly, when I'm enjoying how my diaper feels, as opposed to how it makes me feel, I can become aroused. But being diapered is sexual only because it is also emotionally pleasant. Kind of like wanting to have sex with a girl because you genuinely like her, I suppose.

[sarah_ab]

i consider myself an ab because i gain pleasure from being treated like and subsequently acting like a baby.... pleasure comes all different forms ... for me the pleasure is in becoming sexually aroused by the actions.... i know for others the pleasure is in feeling safe and secure... for others in being able to let go of their adult worries ...

i wasnt offended just ive seen many posts where it becomes the fight of opinions regarding whose definition is right .... and so far this isnt that and its really interesting to read how and why people consdier themselves ab or dl or both!!!

[Diapered Jason]

That is actually very interesting Sarah. I think my initial perception on ABs and DLs is incorrect. It appears we have people who identify as an AB and yet receive pleasure from their treatment, while on the other hand, we have people who identify as a DL who are after the 'safe and secure' feeling.

I am theorizing that this leaves us with three groups of people. We still have the AB/DL category, where people are after both the sexual stimulation and the safe and secure feeling. Now I am going to introduce two new categories. The AB/DL(sex) category is a group of people who enjoy this scene for sexual stimulation. The AB/DL(s&s) category is a group of people who are after the safe and secure feeling (s&s). All three of these categories can be broken up into an infinite amount of subcategories (a spectrum if you will) that depends on how many elements, such as pacifiers, baby bottles, etc that you incorporate into your play or lifestyle. It is important to put all other fetishes aside.

Based on this new system, I would put myself in the AB/DL(sex) incorporating about half of the elements a baby would have.

Note: This is just a theory. Let me know what you guys think though.

[rusty pins]

I am a DL and not an AB. I consider myself a DL. I like the feeling of wearing diapers sometimes, the sexual stimulation, the rush I get when wearing them out and about discreetly under my pants and being able to just pee when I want to without anyone around me knowing what I'm wearing or what I'm doing. I do like some cartoons that I grew up with as a kid. That dosn't make me an AB. I hate pacifiers, acting like a baby, roll play, cribs, baby clothes and all that stuff. I do like seeing pictures of cute girls wearing diapers but not particularly when they are playing baby in baby clothes and cribs. To say that everyone is the same because they all wear diapers is B.S.! That's like saying everyone loves all kinds of cake because they eat chocolate fudge cake! They may hate banana cake, yellow cake, spice cake or apple cake and only like chocolate cake. Same applies to people who like diapers. Some may like wearing diapers only, some may go the whole route with cribs, baby clothes, etc. Some may not like diapers at all but have to use them for medical reasons. Yes, there are many catagories and sub catagories for people who like diapers and some people fit more than one catagory or sub catagory. Others are only into one thing.

[sarah_ab]

did somebody say cake??!!

[Diapered Jason]

Sorry Spokane Girl, I guess we don't know where you draw the line between an AB and a DL. To me, AB/DL makes no sense either. Sure, you may say it is the individual that classifies themselves as AB/DL, which is definitely true; however, when it comes to defining ABs and DLs, it creates a fallacy.

It is important to know though that everyone has their own trigger for beginning this fetish/lifestyle, which results in a different perspective and most importantly different behaviors.

[NikABDL]

everyone seems to have there own interpenetration,

Mine is this, someone who finds diapers sexual or exciting is a DL and someone who like the feeling of regression acting like a baby or child is an AB although i like both so not sure which i am.

Both is also possible i think.

[dlover49]

All if not most ABs also like diapers. All DLs do not care for babyish things. It is hard to draw a hard and fast line between the two. If someone shates their likes and dislikes many of us could tell whether this person is an AB or DL. Speaking for myself, I am a DL but some AB leaning things appeal to me, but others do not. My .02 worth.

[Depends1578]

I'm going to throw my opinion in reguardless and say there is no defined line between AB and DL. I enjoy pacifiers and snuggling up under the covers and love women with pacifiers and consider myself a DL. I would say as long as you are enjoying yourself then you don't need to label yourself strictly with this so called "line". And of course there are opposite ends of the spectrum, so thats fine too.

[Missy Q]

What you feel is what you are.

This goes for anything in life. Being given a certain social label because of your actions and/or beliefs isn't accurate nor realistic.

[PArms]

*pulls out can of gray spraypaint*

*sprays your entire screen*

Solved that problem!

Anyway, I did just think of something:

Part of the enjoyment of regressing is not the regression itself, but the feeling of growing up again.

When I was younger, I wanted nothing more than to be seen as responsible and adult like. Now that I'm an adult (kinda), I get that warm feeling knowing that I accomplished something that adults do on a routine basis.

We praise children so that they grow into responsible adults. We don't praise them for making a mess, but for cleaning it up or not making one to begin with. We praise for staying dry in big girl panties (or big boy underwear), not for accidents. We praise for helping mommy or daddy wash the dishes or help make dinner.

I love getting all diapered up and into my childish mindset only to make dinner, wash the dishes, fold the laundry, write checks, yadda yadda yadda. I enjoy feeling adult like while in the mindset of a child. This certainly isn't ALL the time, but there's a lot more that goes into being AB AND DL. That's how I define myself (with a lot of 'little girl' thrown in there, too).

[Thickndry]

I consider a person an AB when they dress like a baby, onesie, use pacifiers, bottles, etc.

Those who are simply DL like and use diapers under ordinary clothes, and may have some other quirks, but generally nothing to do with wanting to be treated like a baby.