Is It A Fetish

[Guest mommystella]

OK cut a long story short we had a major discussion in chat just now over where ever or not diapers is a fetish or not.

I see diapers as a fetish but we all have different views on it so it be great to hear yours.

Is diapers fetish for you?

[Newroad]

IT all depends on the individual. For some like me it's three aspects to verying degrees. some it is purel;y sexual and others simply a lifestyle choice. And for still others simply a need for medical reaons. There are no absolutes when it comes to humans.

[Guest Sissy Haji]

yeah I agree with the previous poster here, it depends on the person, for me its just a lifestyle, I enjoy wearing them, I dont get any sexual plessure from it.

I used to though don't know when it changed tbh lol.

[MysticChild]

One of the problematic issues in this discussion, which often appears in one form or another in this forum, is the uncritical use of terms that to refer to aspects of AB/DL play. This is especially true of how the term “sexual fetish

[tris]

Ah, but you're wrong! There IS an absolute when it comes to humans: We need oxygen to survive, absolutely. But because we NEED it and (and clearly enjoy breathing, as opposed to not) does that make respiration a fetish, too?

[littlemolly]

Ah, but you're wrong! There IS an absolute when it comes to humans: We need oxygen to survive, absolutely. But because we NEED it and (and clearly enjoy breathing, as opposed to not) does that make respiration a fetish, too?

diapers is what ever you want it do be. fetish, lifestyle or anything. does not matter

[Vic]

I want to respond here, but I do want to say that there have been some excellent answers to this question. This question has been gone over many, many times on this site and nobody has given an answer that satisfies everybodies opinion.

Not everyone feels like this is a fettish, I'm not sure myself, and at the risk of sounding like a whiner I'm going to explain why this is so by describing my early childhood, from what I have been able to piece together over the years.

First, I was born in the 50's, and I was the third of five children. My father got on my mother about the weight she was gaining, so my mom asked her doctor if he could give her something for the weight gain. Prenatal care being a distant thing in the future, he gave my mother speed to take during the pregnancy, and she continued to smoke through it as well.

Needless to say that I was born sickly with bronchial asthma, and kept coming down with pnumonia and having to be left in the hospital by her a lot of the time. Because she had a baby and small daughter at home she was not able to spend any time with me while I was there. So I never really bonded with her.

My mom and I have always had a rocky past due to this, and I never really bonded with my dad as he was too busy being a cop to have anything to do with us kids (he was always hard to be around, and was abusive too). So my earliest recollection has to do with me going down for a nap (I was a bedwetter) when I was around 5, and just enjoying the feel and comfort of the diapers and plastic pants.

Since this was the first clear memory I have I can't tell you as to whether this is fettish or not, just that the desire to wear them happened way too early in life to call them sexual in nature. I have always enjoyed wearing them, and yes when I hit puberty they did become a sexual thing for me, but not so much any more.

I know this doesn't really shed much light on the question, but I did want to point out that for many of us this affection for them started early in life.

Peace,

Vic

[sarah_ab]

seems like no one is actually answering the OP's question.

For me, i consider MY ab play a to be engaging in a fetish behavior that would be considered sexual.

Diapers alone are not a sexual fetish for me, as just wearing a diaper does absolutely nothing for me, but put me in a diaper as a way to treat me more like a baby, and then it is a turn on.

But I consider this to be a sexual fetish for myself.

[Bettypooh]

As someone noted already, the original "Fetish"(proper noun) was an object that supposedly held special powers. In the context used here, a "Fetish"(adjective) is defined by the DSM4 standards as a paraphilic condition, where a person is "characterized by recurrent, intense sexual urges, fantasies, or behaviors that involve unusual objects, activities, or situations and causes clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning". This leads to needing to define "clinically significant distress or impairment etc". It doesn't seem to me that any of us here are distressed or impaired being AB/DL's, so I don't think we are "fetishists" by official definition. Having said that, some of us have stated that they wear diapers for sexual purposes so in that regard some may be fetishists.

For me there's a lot more to my diapers than anything sexual. I like how they feel(especially when wet), I like the sounds of plastic and rubber panties, I like the security of knowing my clothes will stay dry, I like the regimen of putting them on, and I like the convenience of not having to use a bathroom all the time. It's not a fetish for me, just an enjoyable part of my life!

Bettypooh

[curiositykilledthecat]

fetish= abnormal fixation on an object in a sexual manner. So yeah it's a fetish (sorry for over simplifying but I digress)

[diapermommie]

For me, yes. I get turned on by wearing them, by using them, and by seeing my hubby wear and use them. Certainly doesn't cause me any psychological issues, doesn't negatively affect my life whatsoever. But, considering I can think about it (from any aspect) and get that turned on, then yes I'd consider it a fetish. Though I probably have more than one...but the definition remains the same. I've always defined it as an inanimate object causing sexual arousal. Then again, there's nothing inanimate about having a partner cooking dinner in diapers

[poppatom]

This has been a fetish lifestyle for me. I have never felt any guilt or shame over this being sexual for me. i never have had any crisis of faith or questioned it. No need to since it brings me joy and doesn't rule my life. i wouldn't have it any other way.

Being a Daddy and diapering my little one is arousing in many ways. it isn't just sexual for me but it is sexual. I am confident and know what i want and need in my life. having something this special and sharing it with someone i love is what its all about for me.

Peace:)

[adriansurley]

If it is sexual its a fetish - if its not sexual not a fetish :-D

[ColinDL]

I consider it to be a fetish.

I like playing videogames, but it doesn't give me a sexual thrill so it's something I like, not a fetish.

When I put on a diaper it turns me on, and I get a sexual pleasure from them. Therefore, I consider it a fetish.

I use that as a general criteria. Doesn't always apply, but that's the way I think of it.

[icrinkle]

Its a fetish for me but its also part of lifestyle becaue its part of my day to day life.

But who cares if its a fetish or not.

[Saschadzg]

Being a babygirl is my alter ego.

[DiaperBoyKR]

This question is probably the core one of the ABDL world, and we'll be arguing it into the ground for the rest of time. For me, this is largely a fetish, or a fetishistic lifestyle, at I'm fairly sure it is for the majority of us. Do I always feel aroused by the diaper itself? No. Do I experience arousal when I am in baby/kid play? Yes, on occaision. Other times, no. Are there members of our community for whom this is not sexual in any way shape or form? Absolutely. There are genuinely people who are involved in the community who came here because of a tie to diapers that doesnt involve a sexual aspect. Whether it be medical, psychological, whatever, diapers or diaper play have no sex effect on them. To them its probably more of a lifestyle.

That said, I don't know why we have to keep arguing this. Its just another way we keep attempting to divide ourselves up according to labels (just like the whole AB vs. DL thing). We are part of a community that shares a general interest....there will be those of us from all over the spectrum. Life's hard enough on us for liking diapers in the first place, we shouldn't be making our gathering places a site where we divide ourselves even more finely.

[babylin]

MysticChild has presented one of the best thought out, provacative explanations I've had the pleasure to read.

I think it needs to be added that a fetish is not by nature a behavior that arises to a "clinically significant" psycoloogical event.

Just because we like diapers does not make us psychos.

When I was an early teenager I found a PLAYBOY and became aroused. Thereafter, anytime I wanted to be excited sexually

I reached for a PLAYBOY. Was this then a fetish?

HAPPINESS IS WEARING COTTON DIAPERS

[Necare]

For me, this is first and foremost a fetish. Pretending to be a little baby is for me is my primary sexual expression. The only exception I can think of is when I used to sleep beside my ex, suckling on a a paci, then it definitely was more of a comfort/cozy occasion, and a non-sexual matter.

[Bettypooh]

"I think it needs to be added that a fetish is not by nature a behavior that arises to a "clinically significant" psycological event."

You are entitled to your opinion, and rightly so. I based my remarks on the current Diagnostic Standards of Medicine manual(DSM4) which is the medical standard worldwide and in courts of law to make determinations of diagnoses. And I agree with their assesment. But where does one draw thew line of "significant" at? Even the DSM states that there are no clearly defined guidelines for that. In the end, I think it is significant if it you think it is. I can't judge that any more than anyone can(even a trained shrink).

"Just because we like diapers does not make us psychos."

Having a condition that is listed in the DSM does NOT make one a "psycho", which is a totally different thing than a fetishist. Just about everybody is "abnormal" to some degree(which is why I believe that we are all 'normal' really)but most of those quirks are mentioned in the DSM somewhere, and it's the degree of difference that cinches the diagnosis.

"When I was an early teenager I found a PLAYBOY and became aroused. Thereafter, anytime I wanted to be excited sexually I reached for a PLAYBOY. Was this then a fetish?"

Yes, at that time it was a fetish because it was more significant than experiencing the real thing. I'm sure that has changed as you grew and I'd bet that while you still enjoy certain erotic pictures(like we all do), it isn't a fetish anymore. As I explored my own gender issues I became very familiar with psycotherapy, psycology, and how the medical and legal communities see and handle these kinds of issues. I did the research and found that much to my surprise, by their standards everyone could be proven to be some kind of nut if someone wanted to do that. What gets my goat is that if the preceding statement is true, then being nuts is being normal! And if it isn't true, then their whole idea of defining normality is wrong! They're supposed to be well educated and yet they can't even see the obvious paradox of their system......which they list as a psycosis, so we get the psycotics diagnosing us as nuts. Oh brother!

Can't we just see that unless you're harming an innocent person, you're not doing anything wrong? So does it really matter of diapers are a fetish or not? Of course not! I think that sums up my own feelings rather succinctly.

Be careful of the things you ask; you may get rhe answers and they may not be the ones that you wanted to get!

Bettypooh

[Youngatheart252]

it's a fetish

To some it's a fetish like Bondage is a fetish

To others it's a fetish like Shoes are a fetish

by either sense of the word the majority of us fall into either of the two categories.

[MysticChild]

There have been some interesting comments in this thread that provide insight into meaning of AB/DL play. The kind of comments I find most edifying are those like Vic’s in post # 7 that provide a widow into the experience of the person and that explore genesis and functional significance of AB/dl play.

I must admit that I am a bit surprised by how many folks who post here seem to uncritically accept the language of the APA’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) and the abnormal psychology paradigm on which it is based. I invite folks who use this language to read Thomas Szasz’s The Myth of Mental Illness. The book was written in 1961 so it is a bit dated, but the basic dynamic that Szasz identifies in referring to mental illness as a myth is still operative. I think that it may help liberate some from concepts that are at best patronizing and at the core fundamentally demeaning (even dehumanizing) to those who engage in AB/DL play. I know that some here choose to enthusiastically refer to themselves as “deviant,

[babylin]

Mystic Child

"What psychiatrists and psychologists label “mental disorders

[dominaj]

The word "fetish" has so many stigmas attached to it. I prefer to use the term recreation or personal preference.

[curiositykilledthecat]

the term fetish is like the term propaganda, both in of themselves were not given to definitons of a negative consequence but rather the way in which each word has been used has created a negative stigmatism.

Fetish is simply a fixation on an object, by original defnition it was not solely sexual ut alas that is what it has become.